Going Deep with Chad and JT - Ep. 19 - Royal Wedding, Parental Nudity, and Goiters
Episode Date: May 23, 2018Chad and JT dive deep into Chad's wetsuit problems, their thoughts on the royal wedding, the Real Housewives series, goiters + a dude named Goiter, parental conflicts and nudity, influential female fi...gures, tricking out Honda Civics, legends, beefs, babes, and much more! Check it out! For bonus content, check our patreon: www.patreon.com/chadgoesdeep
Transcript
Discussion (0)
Stokers what's up guys how you guys doing welcome to going deep with Chad and JT this is Chad coming
in hot with my compadre what up hello what up Stokers how you doing I'm doing well man I have a little bit of a cold that I'm shaking off, but it's shaking off, so I should be good.
Yeah, you seem to have recovered fairly quickly.
Yeah, it was rough two days ago, and I definitely hate being sick, as does everyone, just because there's so much shit you want to do, and you're just not supposed to do it.
So I have to sit with my feelings, which is the most uncomfortable part.
It's like a hangover, but you're not really sure when it's going to end.
You're like, hopefully this day quill or the night quill will take care of it.
And then you wake up and you're like, fuck.
I want to get back in the gym quick.
It's good, too.
My girlfriend, she's on me.
She's like, make sure you're taking counterattack.
You can take up to eight pills a day.
She basically hands me the Mucinex and i'm like all right fine yeah
yeah because my like default would be like just drink some tea yeah someone was like uh telling
me that the key is just take a day and just lay in bed all day don't do it like just don't do
anything so you can get over it quickly as opposed to just prolonging it by um doing whatever yeah just rest yeah
because that's the key the lord built the earth in six days and on the seventh day
he rested yeah i wonder what god was doing when he was resting probably jagging off whoa
sacrilege dude i want to say that about the almighty was unloading one dude i mean he
probably went no fat for those six days.
I'm just going to say.
He probably went no jagging off.
He was full as fuck.
And he's like, I need to release.
Dog, as a child of Catholic school.
Yeah.
And someone raised in the Lord.
Well, I'm just speaking my truth.
And if I can't do that here, then what is this?
Where did the semen go after he spewed?
Oh, maybe it's the clouds those
look like jizz whoa dude yeah so when you're flying on a plane you're literally cutting through
jizz super lightweight jizz omnipotent jizz nice dude yeah all seeing jizz dude i'm feeling good
i went surfing this morning i um i was uh i was about to go in the water and i noticed i have a huge hole in my
wetsuit in the gooch area so i was doing like that stretch where i i grab my hands and you like pull
them over your head you know what i mean you go down kind of stretch your like shoulders or whatever
i don't know what you stretch but it feels good and uh my balls just like dipped out of the hole
whoa and in that moment at my first thought was
my first feeling was embarrassment i was like oh fuck and then i actually i thought about you in
that moment and your nudist ways and i was like you know what just let it hang and i did yeah i
was just you know pulling my dong out looking for someone to set boundaries but everyone just gave
me green lights and was like keep pulling dong par, par. Yeah. And I was like, all right.
Yeah, keep pulling.
I was like, if it's not that bad, I guess it's cool.
Yeah, I dipped my toe in the water.
As one might say, in this instance,
it was my nutsack in the water.
Hopefully next time when I stretch, dong will let loose.
Oh, you want your dong to come out.
I want to hang dong yeah i'm
glad i'm having a positive influence on you thanks like damn chad started hanging dong like recently
i'm like yeah he's been doing this podcast yeah i used to have get togethers in my house just 10
naked dudes walking around just greek as fuck dude yeah i was like this is sparta not the sparta
where we fight invading armies to defend democracy. The Sparta after the war where everyone's just kicking it, drinking some wine, hanging dong, talking about fun times they had before.
Yeah.
It's a good Sparta.
Oh, yeah.
When I used to go into my mom's room to get a few bucks to go to the mall or something, she'd be sleeping and her jugs would just be hanging out.
Oh, I remember you told me that.
Yeah. So I'd wake her up and I'd be like, Mom, can you put away your boobs? And she'd go, Oh, my Gods would just be hanging out oh i remember you told me that yeah
so i'd wake her up and i'd be like mom can you put away your boobs and she'd go oh my god oh sorry
john thomas and she'd hide her boobs yeah and she'd be like it's not a big deal it's just a woman
and i was like yeah it's freaking me out put your boobs away yeah which she would be in her room or
in the living room in in this story i was telling in her room but yeah her her she wore low-cut uh pajama tops
so her boobs were popping out like regularly that makes me uncomfortable yeah do you tell me about
it like mom can you put your tit away and she's like don't don't shame me john thomas don't shame
me for having boobs but your tits out mom i was like uh i'm not trying to shame you i think you're a great lady
i just can't live my life seeing your jugs this much yeah and then she was like then kill yourself
and i was like wow powerful stuff lady yeah she's passionate yeah yeah i was gonna i was gonna say
i've been watching a real housewives of like all the different cities with my girlfriend.
And I, dude, I've never related to anything more than I relate to Real Housewives.
Oh, for real?
It feels like the most close depiction of what life feels like to me, what it felt like growing up, what my family felt like.
Oh, interesting.
Like when I see them fighting on there, they're like, hey, fuck you.
Leave my fucking sons a baptism.
You know, all you fucking do is say this and that and then you don't fucking deliver get the fuck out of here
and then they're like you're gonna fucking talk to me like that at the fucking baptism
fuck you you piece of shit i'm like yeah this is what it's all about this is how people talk
yeah it's real some people say it's fake like it's all orchestrated i don't know when i look
at it i'm like this is as real as it gets you're coming in to say no yeah dude yeah i i dated this girl for like four days
and in those four days we watched real housewives of miami and uh i didn't really relate to it like
you did but i was really taken away by the picturesque scenery it was like i need to go
to miami and bronze and then i was just like
the dudes like fist fight on real housewives of new jersey oh they do yeah they're just like these
like five free bowling balls just like running into each other full speed yeah i'm like dude
you're old like you're gonna break something but they're like afterwards they're like i'm ready for
you anytime anytime you come to one of my son's birthday parties just be ready for this i'm like
fuck dude my son's birthday's party you got for this i'm like fuck dude my son's
birthday's party you got kids you're fighting like that it's pretty hilarious i guess my dad
one time went to a toga party at his brother's house when they were in their 40s and my dad
found out that my uncle they were selling their hair care company and he found out that my uncle
was doing like a knockoff company that was like a similar product that they were going to sell
like cheaper but my dad was worried it would undermine the sale of the uh of their company you know
because there'd be like a competing brand so um my mom said that they got in fistfights in their
togas yeah and that their dongs fell out and they like came tumbling down the stairs and she goes
my dad's brother's older she goes jimmy beat your dad up and i saw him naked and jimmy has a bigger
penis and my dad was like shut up mom my mom said that in front of like 10 people
she was like jimmy won the fight and my dad was like he was just wearing it like whatever fine
and then she was like and it was funny because his penis was bigger and my dad was like all right
dude that would be totally i'd be so pissed i'd be like how do you
know it's bigger you know grow or not show early yeah exactly it's like when i went streaking um
after a senior year or no senior year of high school it was like a tradition we all go streaking
but it was cold that night you know and i'm like my dong is not living up to its potential
yeah so i was like running around and then like chicks were looking and I'm like
don't look at me like this you know like
this is not a freeing experience
this is just like
my balls are like
it still haunts me to this day because
I don't think they saw my full potential
when I bring that story up
to my dad still to this day
he's like yeah Jimmy
shouldn't have done that
he's still pissed? well he's just he's not pissed he's like yeah jimmy shouldn't have done that that's all he says
well he just he does not pissed he's just like i did the right thing did it undermine the company
no no i think he i think my dad got his way and they they 86ed it oh they did yeah what's your
opinion on the royal wedding are you into it dude i'm stoked i'm just pissed i'm not i don't have
royal blood that's the only thing i can think whenever i see those i'm like fuck i could you know i want to i want like a title you think
he'd be good as a prince or a dutch i think i'd be good at kicking it what's what's the dutch one
i don't know duke the oh dude i think i'd be good at kicking it you know um i don't know whenever
my dad would take me to the country club i was always kind of aggro because
like i didn't want to tuck in my shirt so i'm sure i'd have some issue with like you know the
customs of like royal functions you know they'd be like wear your sword and i'm like but i want
to wear my vans you know what i mean but whenever i see it i'm just like man that would be so cool to be like a
royal dude it does seem pretty cool i would just like feel so under the microscope you know what
i mean like if i like wore something goofy like like you're saying like it'd be on every magazine
and they'd be like prince idiot like you know wears a shirt that has its origins and like some racist thing from
like the 40s and i'm like i didn't fucking know that like you should have known that like you're
gonna be on tv you're a prince and i'm like dude i'm dumb yeah like why you guys keep putting
cameras on me i'm dumb i don't know why i'm southern all of a sudden you'd be a funny prince
because he'd like the news people come up to you and they expect you to be all like proper and
stuff he'd be like well look i, look, I'm a sex addict.
I just jacked off like 10 times today.
And it's just I'm going through some stuff.
And they're like, Prince JT, keep it together.
And you're like, I'm sorry.
I think it's a virtue is to be honest.
I owe it to my constituents to keep it real.
Someone broke it down to me, though.
They're like, you know what's good is instead of being honest about the mistakes you make, how about you try not making those mistakes?
I'm like, that's kind of my identity at this point.
So you're asking me to strip a lot away.
Yeah.
What about, but are you, do you like Meghan Markle?
I think she's babe.
Yeah.
I don't know much about her.
I don't know either.
She looks good.
I like Prince Harry.
It's funny that when they were young, Prince William was, like, the heartthrob.
Yeah. And Prince Harry was kind's funny that when they were young, Prince William was like the heartthrob. Yeah.
And Prince Harry was kind of like the goober.
And then as they've aged, Harry's like the heartthrob and William looks like 80 years old.
He's like 30.
I thought Harry was always kind of the badass.
Well, he did become the badass because William went, I think, more like the academic conventional route.
And then Harry joined the British Special Forces. like i think more like the academic conventional route and then harry joined like the british special forces and he was like really adamant in like public statements that like i want to be
treated like every other soldier you know what i mean he's like i'm not you know i'm not a prince
right now i'm just a soldier in the army and i'm a grunt like my brothers yeah that's cool
do you think they'd ever send him into battle it's tough to say because like um i read this like
winston churchill biography that like kind of stripped down some of the narrative fantasies that he kind of helped perpetuate.
Like that he was in this when he like got deployed when he was in the army or when he was a journalist to like it was India or somewhere in Africa.
And he was in jail and they're like and he broke out of the jail and escaped.
And then in the biography I read there like his family paid for him to be able to leave yeah and then he made it look like an
escape so he'd have a better story to tell when he got home smart yeah it was super smart i mean
like you know it's it's it's still a story that people reference when they're like dude churchill
was a badass yeah so like i mean it was it was brilliant marketing on his part but i'm like
always skeptical of any supremely wealthy or or a well-off person like
telling a story of like how they were you know gritty yeah would you marry him oh sorry go ahead
do you think what if you like he saw a battle and they're like bullets flying he's like never mind
like can you guys i need some human body shields it's'd be like, yeah, fuck this.
I'm going to go back to the castle.
I would like a ceremony before I leave.
Let's have a nice party, shall we?
What about sports betting being legalized across the United States?
I didn't know that happened.
Yeah.
That's cool.
Yeah, they legalized sports gambling.
I didn't know that was a... i don't know anything about that world i i actually i'm i consider myself a pretty lucky dude there's one
time i was is my brother's bachelor party and um you know the way it is usually with my brothers
they're like let's go do an activity they're like chad doesn't know anything about it we're
gonna bring him along so we went to like a horse race and they're like chad's go do an activity. They're like, Chad doesn't know anything about it, but we're going to bring him along. So we went to like a horse race.
And they're like, Chad, and my older brother's like, Chad, I'm going to put you in for a race.
And I'm like, for sure.
And he's like, what are some numbers?
I rattle off some numbers.
He's like, all right, horse names, whatever.
Again, I'm not familiar. he just did it all for me
and i ended up winning the superfecta which is like the hardest thing to win
and they're like damn chad how'd you win that i'm like i'm just a lucky dude you know i just
didn't really think about it you know i just sort of won the superfecta like it's pretty tight
when i went to vegas i think what you're speaking to is a real corollary because like when i went
to vegas with my boys like um my buddy who was like the most stingy with cash and like the most
competitive would always lose right away like he's like i'm only gonna play five dollars a hand
and i'm gonna make this last and i'm gonna make this 50 bucks last for like three nights and then
like 20 minutes and he'd be like i'm broke i lost everything he'd be like well yeah because you're
like so fucking stressed out dude and i was like, yeah, but feeling like you don't have to win will help you a ton.
That is kind of the key.
I think the world feels it.
Yeah, there's a lot of things with, I think with so many things in life,
it's just like, dude, quit trying so hard.
When you try so hard, that's when you get a hernia and fuck your nuts up.
Yeah, it's like work hard but don't like
don't try to make everything happen in the moment yeah don't force it yeah it's so hard
it is so hard when you want something so bad it actually leads into something i wanted to talk
about that's not really topical but just of interest to me is like um how growing up in
orange county like the best thing you could be was chill you know what i mean like the coolest
guy was always the most relaxed guy you were like dude andrew like nothing gets him bothered he just
like goes with it like literally you could throw anything i'm gonna be like chill you're like whoa
yeah how'd you do that how'd you not feel any of that turned out he was just you know smoking a
shit ton of balls but like um yeah i was like i've like now you know people will be like
par you're chill and i'm like nah dude not i've just learned from years of growing up in orange
county to bottle the psycho yeah yeah you always call yourself a psycho and i'm just like you're
fine you're like no i'm bipolar i'm like are you i think think I've just given myself a wider berth to make mistakes.
Yeah.
I'm like, oh, you are bipolar.
Oh, okay.
Yeah, you did forget to grab me that coffee when he said he'd grab me one.
I'm like, yeah, I'm bipolar.
Yeah.
Yeah, I don't know why people don't use that stuff more to their advantage.
You know what I mean?
You can get out of stuff so easily if you just leaned into like whatever uh ailments you were dealing with
that is interesting people are like no i don't want anyone to know i'm like dude it's a gift
i'm perfectly healthy i'm like you've got a goiter the size of my a cantaloupe what's a goiter
it's a fucking ball that grows out of your fucking neck i don't know that's a great word goiter yeah dude i love that
dude what's that goiter fuck i don't know man just fucking grew it's like some nickname a dork
hey goiter get over here sorry goiter get over here what up dude hey what up goiter where were you today oh man my dad got pissed at me dude i fucked up bad dude
i left my room a mess and i accidentally peed on the floor instead of in the bathroom and my dad
is fucking mad dude goiter as you know the only reason you're friends with us is because we make
you do crazy shit oh yeah the only reason i'm friends with you guys is because you make me do crazy shit am i right yeah so um i think today how about you go put a dynamite stick in a cow's ass
yeah dude i know just the dynamite stick and i know just the cow's ass you do yeah bro oh he
doesn't know how cow's ass is. Oh, yo. He's stupid.
Also, can you pick us up some Taco Bell?
Yeah, bro.
Goiter's on it.
Goiter.
Yeah.
Chug eight liters of soda right now.
Oh, they all was about to do that anyways.
Yeah, bring it over, bro.
What is that, Dr. Pepper, dude?
Yeah.
Oh, wait.
Did you tell me to chug it through my butt or through my mouth?
Through your butt.
Yeah, I figured.
We established this three days ago. You don't chug anything through your mouth goiter goiter accomplished what do you think about this
whole uh china u.s uh trade war i was gonna consider it for my beef a beef of the week
oh is it your beef of the week no no i was considering it but then i was like you know what
chad keep it local do you have you read into it much no not, not really. Have you ever heard Jermaine talk about Chinese tools?
No, what does he say?
They're garbage?
Yeah, he's like, was that Ribboni?
He's like, is that a fucking Ribboni saw?
Dude, look at these idiots cutting wood with Ribboni saws.
Why don't you go American, you fucking assholes?
This is why I voted for Trump.
Are the American tools better?
Apparently. he says the
chinese ones break down all the time interesting it's not because he's i mean maybe he's a little
bit racist but like it's it's also uh he says that he's uh he's had bad experiences dude one
time i was uh we were in uh nevada buying when we were driving through and um
this is my dad my brother and there's a firework stand like dude let's stop at the firework stand
we stop at the firework stand my dad's like super cautious and he's he's like yeah there are a lot
of rockets here um could these light a house on fire and we're in this like old kind of like
firework shop and this old guy in like a rocking
chair and like the corner like the dusty corner we didn't even know he was there he like stands up
and he looks at us he's like you're goddamn right they can and we're like for sure dude and then he
sits back down dude i think there's people like that peppered throughout the world who like are um their their role yeah their destiny is to give ominous uh warnings to to naive people that was totally his role strider's
brother one time told me he was playing racquetball and they weren't wearing glasses or goggles and
this guy came up was like wear glasses and they were like what and they turned the guy had one eye
and he just disappears after yeah but the thing is like you don't even know if he lost that eye
playing racquetball you know what i mean but it works for anything you know like you could go up
to a guy fishing and be like hey watch the way you're throwing that lure you're like what i'd
know how to throw my okay dude i was i was i was driving in the car this isn't a current event but i was driving in the car
yesterday and dude pink has some jams man for sure for sure for sure i heard 2002 jam
just like a pill it's her best song i was i was driving yesterday serious xm that song came on
i was like oh fuck pink you know how to rock it. It's a very, very good song. Yeah.
I was really stoked.
I want to get Pink props.
Yeah.
The thing about Pink, though, is she was never, like, someone I, like, she was never, like, a Britney Spears for me or, like, you know, Ariana Grande, where I'm like, I want to,
like, totally hook up with Pink.
It's just like, oh, she seems tough.
And, like, she could kick my ass.
And she'd probably disapprove of me.
I think she'd like you a lot.
She talks about it in one of her songs.
She goes, I hate that damn Britney Spears.
She's so pretty.
That was like her being vulnerable.
Oh, yeah.
She told the world like, yeah, I do wish I looked like Britney Spears.
Dude, Jessica Simpson in Dukes of Hazzard.
Yeah.
That was insane.
That music video?
Unbelievable.
I watched the trailer for that movie.
I was like, I can't go see that in theaters because I'm going to have to bail to the bathroom to unload some feelings.
Yeah.
That means jag off.
Because she's too hot.
Yeah.
She's too hot.
Then John Mayer got in all that trouble because he did an interview and he was like, Oh man, when I dated Jessica Simpson, she was sexual napalm.
He said that?
Yeah.
That's so funny.
He got in trouble for it.
Sexual napalm.
That doesn't seem that offensive to me.
Nah, but you shouldn't be talking about what it was like to bone a chick to the whole world.
Yeah, I guess you wouldn't go on the Today Show.
Yeah.
We got a new segment guys we're doing a new segment this week uh called the movie quote of the week it's our favorite movie quote
from the past week my movie quote of the week uh my movie quote of the week is from the uh movie
gattaca from 1997 starring ethan hawke uma Thurman, and Jude Law. It's a
story about a sort of dystopian future where what your job is and what your life is is determined
at birth based off of your like biological makeup. So the main character played by Ethan Hawke
has like weak lungs and desperately wants to be an astronaut, but just doesn't have the makeup
for it. So they make him be a janitor,
but he doesn't accept that.
So he ends up taking over the identity
of somebody else who could be an astronaut
and he pretends to be an astronaut
and no one thinks it's possible.
No one thinks it'd be possible
to impersonate someone like that
because you wouldn't be up to snuff
when it came to the actual doing of the job.
But he has so much willpower
that he ends up being able to fake it.
And his brother who had like superior genetics, uh, can't believe it. And so at the end of the movie or sorry for spoilers guys. So, um, they do this thing as brothers where they
swim into the ocean. And once one of them gets too scared that they're too deep or too far out,
one of them says chicken or something like that. And so the two brothers are swimming
and the older brother who's like supposed to be stronger is getting worked.
And he's like, Vincent, Vincent, how are you doing this?
How did you do any of this?
And Vincent says, I didn't save anything for the swim back.
That's my movie quote.
What's your movie quote of the week,ad um so as a kid i loved the matrix
um it was like my favorite one of my favorite movies and i would always like in the pool i
would always do matrix moves like i would i would run up the wall and stuff underwater and i'd you
know pretend i was dodging bullets and stuff and um i think one of the best quotes from that movie is when neo is he's just
been out he's just been unplugged from the matrix matrix and he like looks at the dude mouse or no
he looks at tank and he's like jujitsu i'm gonna learn jujitsu and like I thought that was like the best quote of the movie
who is your
babe of the week
babe of the week
my babe of the week
is uh
I'm super stoked on this one
my babe of the week
is Mila Kunis
from I'm Forgetting Sarah Marshall
wowzers
so I don't
yeah I don't want to just
I don't want to just go
Mila Kunis in general
I want to go Mila Kunis
from I'm Forgetting Sarah Marshall
because whenever I see that movie
wait why do you keep calling it I'm Forgetting Sarah Marshall because whenever I see that movie... Wait, why do you keep calling it I'm Forgetting Sarah Marshall?
I think I wrote in forgetting, but they auto-corrected to I'm.
All right, so yeah, Mila Kunis, you're my baby of the week
because every time I watch that movie,
she just fully exemplifies the kind of lady that I would like.
A girl who chooses Hawaii,
a girl who is down with a beach, who likes surfers, who is super chill, but like, you can tell
she has a lot of sexual energy in the B room, a girl who, you know, just really,
when you like kick it with her, she just like, she has this like look of
understanding, but like super cool and like, just like so hot. And, um, it's just like every time I
watch that movie, I'm just like, I'm like, Mila, yes, you portray the ideal lady, you know? So,
uh, you're my babe of the week because you know it's just um you really just
like killed it in that movie and you really just made me you know yearn for true love because you
know a lot of times especially in society today society today i feel like people can kind of like
brush they'd be like oh love's whatever you know you should just like eat power bars and i'm like
granted that's like something you can do but But like every time I watch Mila Kunis and Forgetting Sarah Marshall,
I'm like, but I want that more than protein. Yeah. She radiates in that film.
Yeah. Who's your babe of the week? My babe of the week is Miss Breen. Miss Breen was my senior
year of high school English teacher. Miss Breen was 21 years old when I was 18.
She graduated college as a junior and immediately went into teaching at a private school where
you don't need a full teaching credential to teach.
Miss Breen and I were tight.
We were thick as thieves.
There's no sort of lurid story here.
It was just pure friendship.
And was it a little bit boundaryless and weird? Absolutely.
But there was nothing untoward. I used to go to her class every day, ditch other classes,
ditch art, ditch psychology, ditch math, and just go hang out in her room. And we would just talk
about life, you know, and we were sort of at the same place. And I really just connected with her
and I was a bad student, but she always stood up for me and, you know, gave me opportunities to be better, which I really appreciated. And we still talked for you know i was coming from like a boundary list moral relativist kind of perspective and i think
we both helped the other one mature so thank you for being a killer english teacher thank you for
you know all the good talks she also told me that she realized after i was her student
that you can't change someone. Nice.
Yeah.
That's profound.
I'm jealous that you had so many influential female figures in the school system in your life.
Oh, yeah, because Janet featured Focus, too.
Yeah.
I feel like I...
Well, I was so scared of chicks,
I needed some women that I could be honest with.
Yeah.
I think I had some like,
some kind of like macho-ness about me where I was just like,
if I'm talking to a chick,
it's because it's sexual.
You know,
I never,
I don't think I was mature enough to be like,
be like,
you know,
she can support me and like,
you know,
mentor me.
I was just like,
I'm hanging out with dudes and my bros.
Although I do have my sisters and my mom and they're I love them so much. So
Maybe that's all I needed. I think I felt so much pressure to be a lethario to be a class a dick slinger
Yeah, that the fact that I wasn't
Was a point of great shame for me
So it's nice to have some older more mature women who could see that in me and kind of say hey
Even though you're
not like filling dong bags you're still a good dude dude having dick slinging aspirations and
not fulfilling them and just sort of leaving them lingering out in the ethos is like super can really
put a damper on your full on your whole just ego and just psyche you're like i'm supposed to be slinging cock but now i'm just
slinging like video games i remember one time i cried to miss breen i said my dad wants me to
fucking be getting laid all the time and that's just not who i am
i actually don't think my dad cared that much yeah I think he just wanted me to go easy on
myself but at the time I was putting monumental pressure on myself to be the man yeah and with
Miss Breen I could let go of that so but I was still the man at dinner would you dad like so JT
slinging dick yeah my dad would be like so boys you laying the pipe yeah and i'd be like in my head i'm like oh fuck
i'm not laying any pipe i've never laid pipe yeah i was like were you honest i'm afraid no
it was like the only thing i like you know now i'm super honest but then i you know i had a lot
of shame yeah i'd lie to people yeah but actually i was i was honest a couple times i think i was
honest throughout high school that i was a virgin but then once all my because all my friends were
virgins but then once all my friends lost their virginity,
I was like,
I'm not a virgin.
They were like,
how'd it happen?
I was like,
I was on,
I was in a different country and you guys will never meet her.
And I lost my virginity and it was great.
My dad always just assumed I was slang all the time.
So like he just like family functions.
He'd be like,
yeah,
Chad's slang.
Well,
you're beautiful.
Oh,
thanks.
Have you be like,
yeah,
Chad's slang.
I'm like, not really, but thank you dad. So I you been like, yeah, Chad Slang. I'm like,
not really, but thank you, dad. So I just didn't, yeah, sort of, I just didn't correct him.
Yeah. One time these girls came back from the bar to my crib with me and some of my friends.
And like, I was just like, I'm just gonna be a nice guy. And I was just super nice to them.
And then we just had a lot of fun hanging out and talking and joking around. And then they both
slept in my room together and I slept on the couch yeah and then later that day i was playing like pickup basketball
with a few of my friends and a few of my dad's friends and one of my dad's friends was like
like i missed a layup and one of my dad's friends was like yeah jt can't finish that's why the girls
were sleeping in his room while he was on the couch and like 30 people laughed at me yeah damn
they were all like and i was like yeah i can't imagine being Yeah. Damn. They were all like, ah! And I was like.
Yeah, dude.
I came back to my nephews, like their friends, just like, yeah, little Charlie came and slung
dick.
And I was just being a gentleman.
Like, I was like, oh, they're not into it.
They can just sleep in my room and I'll drive them home.
It's so funny when you get a little bit older and you look at it from their perspective
now and you're like, that was like super fucked up up yeah but at the point you're like i guess that's
what older dudes say dude i there's a story um this is uh mark um but uh he uh there's a story
about this guy i don't know the full story but so this guy that he knew somehow or another got
linked up with arnold schwarzenegger in like a pro-am
golf tournament or something so like they were golfing together and apparently just
arnold was just like tossing back brewskis probably tossed back like 20 brewskis which
i'm just like you're fucking beast like i just admiration through the roof and he's like please
tell me are you are you laying pipe or what are you laying pipe on where you laying pipe he's like please tell me are you are you laying pipe or what are you laying pipe huh
where you laying pipe he's like he's like yeah you know here and there he's like come on i'm
an old man you know tell me are you laying pipe and he's like um he's like yeah i guess he's like
well tell me this when was your last blowjob huh and my accent is fucking dark shit i think it's
pretty good it's pretty good.
Well, tell me.
When was your last blowjob?
When was your last blowy?
When was your last blowy?
He's like, I think like a week ago.
And then Arnold leans back with his cigar.
He's like, how did it taste?
And just starts laughing.
That's awesome.
That is a phenomenal Arnold story. Yeah. I wish my accent sorry stokers my accent was fucking how did it taste my accent chokes donkey dicks who's your uh
who's your beef of the week um my beef of the week is with uh ass clown um ass clown he um so senior year of college we um you know ass clown he drove a classic
honda civic around like 2 000 times so the ones you've seen fast and furious super stoked on it
that's when they had their best body types no doubt yeah and it was a piece of shit though
like he didn't trick it at all like literally when you drove the muffler would scrape on the street
and you just hear this and he's like what is that he's like it's the muffler would scrape on the street and you just hear this
and he's like what is that he's like it's a muffler dude and so um so uh my boy mason and i
we took it upon ourselves to we're like you know what this is a fast and furious car we need to
treat it like one like this is it has called lizard our house and he does and he has like a
car that's not fast and he has a fast
meters car that's not fast and furious type so we're like all right we're gonna fix this up so
we go to AutoZone and we're like dude let's get street glow and some stickers we get street glow
stickers put them on put on the street glow on his car which looked legit it was blue street glow and ask him we kept
him we kept him um he loved xanax so i think we just gave him xanax and he he nodded off for like
a few hours you know classic distraction move and just like where's that where's uh ask clown
oh he's blacked out in xanax like nice right let's put the street glow on so we do that um and uh we do that and then he
sobers up and we're like ass clown what up dude like we got a surprise for you and um mason who's
just a beast he like we like bring him outside this is in our college town we bring ass clown
outside and mason pulls up in the street glow honda does some donuts in the street and like pops open the door
and with like beats blaring and we're like we tricked out your car dude congrats and he got
so pissed he was just like what you guys put streak on my car fuck you dudes like you can't
just take my car and put streak on you can't just put stickers on it and just like think that i'm
gonna be okay with that like what the fuck and i'm like whoa dude like i think this is on par with when you know vin and jesse created paul
supra you know like i think you should be grateful and he's like no fuck that take the street glow
off take the stickers off i want my civic to be a piece of shit i'm like ass clown like fine you know and
i love you dude ass clown but like to be honest like after that experience i lost a lot of respect
because i was just like you can be passionate about movies and stuff fast and furious but if
you're not real about that passion then like i think that just shows a lot about your character dude so so that's my beef my dog there's a lot of
love between us right yeah and that can't be broken yeah so can i respectfully be contrarian
on your beef yeah while i agree with you aesthetically and what you did to ask clown's
car don't you think the thing that he was most upset about was that you guys removed his autonomy in designing the car i see your point
par and i love you and this love cannot be broken but i just want to counter with fuck ass clown and
he should have been stoked on the street glow but thank you for i'm always open to different
differing opinions but um ass, you can suck my dick.
All right, my Beef of the Week is with another teacher, Miss Kniep.
Miss Kniep was my seventh grade earth science teacher.
She just straight up didn't like me, and I get it.
But this is one instance where I think you can see why we had beef we go to catalina for
seventh grade science field trip you go for a couple days it's fucking fire dude you're hanging
out all day playing tennis playing football hanging out with the girls in the class without
too much adult supervision it's really freaking fun and cool we're going snorkeling we're going
on hikes we're checking out the
surrounding environment catalina's got a lot to offer not to brag but i also uh led a raid of the
girls cabins on the second night you dog you fucking dog i remember being out in front of about
75 seventh graders i started in the front i was the slowest kid in the class by the time we got
there i was last yeah but that was just a fierce feeling of like William Wallace type, you know, empowerment where I was like, let's go. And then we just bomb rushed the girls. Cam ran through and all the girls were like, ah, ah, ah. But having the time of their lives and we were just ransacked and who knows what we were looking for. And I was the last one back. I stayed behind enemy lines. I hid under a bed and like all the girls were in their room like I can't believe that did you see they all came in here and I
just started giggling my face off and they were like oh my god JT's still in here and like eight
chicks beat me up and I was like oh come on ladies relax and they were all chucking me out of there
and then the teacher like grabbed me by the ear and was like get out of here but even the teacher
had like a wicked little smile like that JT'sT's encouraged. And I'm like, what up, dude?
I'm just trying to have a little fun on Catalina.
Whatever.
It's all good.
Other minor thing that happened when I was there, this one kid, Josh, was that you'd
pick your tennis partners.
And I kept getting picked because I'm pretty good at tennis.
And then Josh said, we only pick JT so that he'll be our friend and make us popular.
And I got super pissed.
And I was like, fuck you, Josh.
I'm good at tennis.
Don't ever talk about me like that again.
And then he was like, fuck you, dude.
I'm just telling the truth.
And I was like, that's your truth.
Don't fucking project that on the rest of the class, bitch.
All right.
My serving volley skills are fire.
Then I fucking huddled up into a ball and I was like, who am I?
All right.
That's probably getting cut
But here's my
So here's my beef with Miss Kniep
We're sizing up for the last day
The last day is valuable time is of the essence
Everyone gets to pick what their activity is going to be for the day
I'm like in the back 80th percentile
Of the line
So I'm not going to get first dibs
I get up to the front your options are hike
Like microscope Kayaking Everyone, like microscope, kayaking.
Everyone wants to do the kayaking.
There's only one spot left on the kayaking.
There's like 20 kids behind me.
I'm looking at like seven of my seventh grade teachers.
I am the biggest troublemaker in class.
I have a horrible reputation.
I have a 1.0 GPA.
I look at the teachers.
I look at all the kids behind me and I go, does anybody want the last kayaking spot? So I basically offered up to other people.
The teachers go, JT, wow, you are a sweet kid. The priest goes, I have to tell you,
this was the one who ended up being a molester. He goes, JT, sometimes you just do the sweetest
things I've ever seen. You're a good kid.
Then Miss Kniep goes, he's a manipulative little weenie.
Don't believe any of it. Miss Kniep was right. I was virtue signaling. I wanted to look like a
good person to the teachers and to the kids. There's no doubt she nailed me,
but the optics of it were terrible. The other teachers were like, Jesus, Kniep,
chill out. He's 12. And I signed up for the hike and I walked away. But the thing is,
her beef with me was right. I was trying to look like a good dude but but when you're a teacher and you're calling
out a 12 year old for when you call a 12 year what am i trying to say there's no good way to
say you think a 12 year old's a shit heel of a person and so i just walked away and kniep we
beefed we both saw each other i saw me and you and you saw you and me.
And a few years after I graduated, she sent me a Jimi Hendrix movie on VHS and said, Hey,
I hope you're well. I think this movie is the real deal. I think you'll really enjoy it.
So thank you Kniep for extending that olive branch. I never watched the Hendrix movie.
I don't even know why you thought I was that big of a Jimi Hendrix fan.
I don't think we ever talked about it, but I appreciated the gesture nonetheless.
Can I, as you did for me, can I present a contrarian POV?
I'm super vulns right now, but yeah, hit it.
Don't you think maybe you should be grateful to miss kniep
for exposing your true self so you could be more honest to the classmates
chad i think you're too smart because you're seeing actually what i'm feeling which i'm
thankful to her for doing that because she laid bare what was obvious and i want to live with obvious truth all right my dog
who's your legend of the week my legend of the week is um my legend of the week is ass clown
yeah um ass clown dude you're a fucking beast ass clown i met him in college and we met freshman year
and uh it was just it was like that first week where i'm like whoa you can party a lot here this
is awesome and i was just so stoked and i was just like all right i need to find my bearings i need
to find my squad i need to you know i need to make this place worthwhile I need to live it up to the fullest. And I go into one of the fraternity houses, Blue.
I go into Blue House.
I don't know what it's called now.
But I go into Blue House, and I see a squad of dudes standing in a circle.
They're sparking up a J.
And I see Ass Clown at the head of it.
He's like, all right, I rolled this up.
Who wants in on it?
And I'm like, yo, what up, dude? I want in on it. What's of it. He's like, all right, I rolled this up. Who wants in on it? And I'm like, yo, what up, dude?
I want in on it.
What's your name?
He's like, Jack.
I'm like, for sure.
And then we hit it off from there.
And the thing is, this guy is a bull in a china shop, dude.
We became pledges.
And he would just continually fuck things up for us.
But it was hilarious.
He'd show up to like the
pledge stuff just hammered and we just have to like do push-ups and stuff but like i was laughing
the whole time because ass clown was such a piece of shit though but it was like hilarious you know
and then like you know we went to cabo we went to cabo and senior year break, we were just living it up. And first day, Ass Clown is just off the rails, you know, just blacked out.
And he comes up to me.
He's like, dude, you want to go streaking in front of these chicks?
And I'm like, no, but you do you, Ass Clown.
First day at Cabo, he gets kicked out of the hotel in Mexico.
And he had to go, like, hitchhike to some other dude's place.
And he totally ruined the trip for, like, uh, he had to go, like, hitchhike to some other dude's place, but, uh, he, and he totally ruined the trip for, like, four dudes, but it was awesome, like, it was hilarious, you know,
you can just, like, ruin stuff, but it's so funny that, like, you're just, like, I love him even
more now, so, um, and that was hilarious, but, yeah, you know, he's just, like, he's constantly
having freakouts and just, but it was just, like, the most entertaining stuff of all time,, he's just like, he's constantly having freak outs and just, but it was just
like the most entertaining stuff of all time.
And he's a super good dude with a good heart and he just wants everyone to have fun and
be happy.
So, um, I see that in you ass clown and, uh, I just want to say I love you dude and you're
a legend and thank you for all the good times.
Oh, oh, and one time.
Okay.
So we were like juniors in college and college and uh we were partying in front
of some house and he comes up all disheveled and stuff from this dorm and he's like and we're like
dude where where are you coming from he's like i'm coming from dawn the fucking dorm like what
were you doing in dorm he's like these kids were talking shit to me so i went to go fight him
and they kicked me in the fucking balls man so apparently he went to go fight these freshmen
and like three of them and like he
went to go fight him and just straight away this dude just kicks him in the nuts.
All right my legend of the week is Justin Bieber. Oh nice. Yeah as I said I'm a moral relativist
so like I put all the bad things you do into the context of the circumstances you're in.
I think that Biebs obviously had some embarrassing moments, like when he egged his neighbor's
house or when he like hit that phony layup while playing pickup with his friends.
And then he mad dogged the camera like he was hard.
Like to me, those are mistakes that douches make, but that doesn't mean you're going to
be a douche for life.
You're just a douche because you're in a period of doucheness in your life.
And unfortunately for him, his doucheness was under the microscope where we could all see it so i always felt like he was kind of whack but that
he would figure it out and then we should all give him time and boy did he ever figure it out
when he came out with that album in 2015 purpose i sorry, what do you mean?
Love yourself.
Incredible jams. I think better than any Timberlake
album. Wow.
I put it above any Usher album.
Whoa. And I put him at the peak
of like pop R&B
heartthrob
charts. I think he's number one.
And I think he's only getting better. I think him
hopping on that Despacito song was fire everyone got annoyed by that song but i never did i thought it was just
one of the most danceable tracks i've heard yeah and that's my kind of thing when it's earworming
like that and right when it hits you your butt just starts shaking you know like juno diaz who's
in a lot of trouble right now for some uh ugly he did, he described a girl's butt as she moved like she had a bell for a butt.
That's what Justin Bieber does for me.
He makes my butt swing.
Yeah.
I really like all the art you're putting out,
and I'm glad that you seem to have matured a lot,
and I knew you had it in you, dawg.
That's beautiful.
Thank you.
That's really beautiful.
All right.
Would you ever see a Bieber concert?
Yes.
Dude, I want to see it.
Let's do it together.
What's up, Stokers?
This episode of Going Deep with Chad and JT is brought to you by Kevin Farr, an attorney at law.
Did you, a friend, or a loved one just have the worst night of your life getting busted for a DUI?
Getting popped by an undercover squeeze thinking you were just paying for love?
Getting thrown in the slammer
for squaring up with a boogie boarder who dropped in front
of your barrel? Don't worry
Kev's got your back. Give Kevin
Fard, attorney at law, call at
213-290-6464
and ask how he can defend
you!
That's 213-290-6464
or kevinfardlaw.com
That's K-E-V-I-N-F-A-R-D-law.com.
Serving Southern California.
This is a legal advertisement and does not constitute legal advice or an attorney-client relationship.
Epic.
And I just want to go off book here and say, Kevin, you're a fucking beast.
I love you, dude.
And he can fix any potential sitch you find yourself in.
Well done.
Dude, we got a lot of fire questions this week.
We're diving in.
Yeah.
What up, Chad?
What up, JT?
What up, dude?
Me and my boy Colin have been thinking of ways to up our stoke,
and we decided that watching every Paul Walker movie over the summer
would really get us amping.
Do you have any advice for the order to watch the movies in?
We were thinking going crony, but wanted to see if you guys had any input. Walker movie over the summer would really get us amping. Do you have any advice for the order to watch the movies in?
We were thinking going crony,
but what,
but wanted to see if you guys had any input.
Also,
what is your favorite non fast and furious Paul Walker movie?
Jake.
Dude,
I just think for the sake of time management, because it's going to be so hard to make a list.
I just go crony.
That's just my first instinct.
Yeah. Off the top top i agree with you the
only thing i might do uh to better enjoy it might be to go reverse cronny to go benjamin button on
it oh you dog and then i think so by the time you get to the beginning you'll be looking at the most
innocent and sweet version of paul yeah and that could be a nice way to part yeah and uh so what's your favorite
non-fast and furious paul walker movie favorite oh that's a favorite movie's always a tough question
um i'm gonna pick a comedy and a drama i'm gonna go with pulp fiction and old school no what are your favorite non-fast and
furious paul walker movies oh paul walker movies um but i'm keeping that in uh
into the blue it's just so feel good it just makes me want to go to the beach
good it just makes me want to go to the beach um so my favorite you know it's hard because it's not really a paul walker movie but i would probably have to go with uh she's all that
nice but you know what every paul walker movie is a paul walker movie regardless there's no
small parts only small actors and paul is proof of that he was loomed large in that film hey guys
i had a tough school year emotionally.
Oh, well tell us more.
And ended up putting on about 20 pounds.
I've been back in the gym and feeling better recently,
but with summer approaching,
I've been ghosting on my past hookups.
I can really pipe.
I believe you.
And I don't think the majority would care about my weight,
but I think I'm a bit too self-conscious
as of now to have fun getting naked.
Should I be up front with them
or just keep barely replying and mostly ghosting them? The thing is getting naked should i be up front with them or just keep
barely replying and mostly ghosting them the thing is if i cared about my relationship with them i'd
have already said something and probably have been hanging with them so is it healthy to forego sex
until i'm feeling confident or would it be better to die back in cheers joe
dude i think hesitation leads to no asian. I would just dive back in, man.
Don't let this...
Because the more you prolong this,
the more you're going to just get more self-conscious.
And then you just eventually, when the time comes,
eventually when you decide you want to get back in the sack,
I think your confidence is going to take a major hit.
So, dude, don't be ashamed of your bod, dude.
You don't know how you know if someone
gives you shit for it be like hey yeah i'm working through some through some stuff but
i'm doing intermittent fasting and i'm doing sprints so i'm gonna be back as a beast in no
time so why don't you go fuck yourself and just hop back in that sack dude be proud of who you
are love yourself dog yeah dude from the way that you're writing this i can tell that you still have
a pretty good body i think uh the sexiest thing you can do is not be self-conscious about how you look.
Because here's the thing.
Everyone's self-conscious about how they look.
So if you go into these situations with these ladies and you feel total comfort with their body,
you unwittingly give them like a green light to feel totally comfortable with their body.
And that's what really makes for great sex, is people who are comfortable with each other.
What up, Chad? What up, JT?
Embarking on a journey of love,
I found myself talking to a total hog.
Hogs are what my closest colleague and I call babes.
Shout out, Corey.
Yeah, I don't think you should call them hogs.
When I read that, too, I was like,
hog? I think it's referred to as dong.
Yeah, it's just kind of an ugly word.
But here's what I got hog tied in a
bit of a predicament so this babe and i were totally kicking things off straight until this
dude asked her to prom which she said yes to i thought that it was for my chances so i moved on
and started conversation with this other girl who i've had a great time hanging out with but it
turns out the first girl has a crush on me and so does the other i hate having to choose between the
two because they're both such great girls and i don't want to hurt either of them emotionally what do i do do i keep playing
the game and talking to both of them or do i pick one and hope it plays out if i pick one who who do
i pick i've been torn about this topic for the past few days and i'm afraid time's running out
you guys are both great philosophers of the modern age true and also seem to be masters in the art of
love not quite yeah so i hope you can guide me to ride the proper wave here.
P.S. Love the Sick Pod.
Listening to you guys every Wednesday gets me mad.
Gets me and my boys stoked for the weekend.
Not mad, sorry.
To put back some stones.
Thanks for all the great energy, Nathan.
Did he give details as to either one?
No.
He's like, which do I pick?
Yeah.
Well, I think, I mean, it's high school,
so you can go to a dance with one girl and end up with another girl.
But I did that one time, and it really hurt the girl's feelings.
Yeah.
And in retrospect, I was sort of a douche.
Yeah.
Like, I was riding high off the hog.
Whoa, accident.
Because I had won Winter Formal King that night.
Yeah.
So I was feeling no pain.
But in retrospect retrospect it was super
insensitive yeah and the girl i won't the girl i ditched was the queen and i did sure to hook up
with another girl yeah i ditched my queen just hearing you talk about it sounds like a bummer
and the other one she chose to go with you know whoever asked her so you know and the truth of
it is dude it's it's high school so like everybody's boundary list
like you and this other girl might end up together but just make sure you treat the girl you don't
pick with respect you show her a good time and you give all of yourself to the moments you guys
have together but not in a way where you lead her on. I know it sounds tough. That's what's needed.
Good stuff.
What up, boys?
Hope you're having a stoked day.
Thanks.
Thank you, we are.
First of all, your podcast is a fucking beast,
and I became extra stoked to learn you guys get as motivated from David Goggins as I do.
I'm writing to you guys
because I find myself in a situation
where I am best friends with this girl
and we are tight on all levels,
but I want to take it to the next step,
but don't know how to do it in a way where I don't ruin our friendship.
We have hooked up once earlier in the year and considered it a moment
considered in the moment kind of thing,
but I sense there might be mutual attraction between the two of us.
So I want to take it to the next level,
but I was wondering you if you boys had any good tips besides obvious ones.
I've told her that I consider her my wing girl and she's helped me with other
girls, but the fact of the matter is I want her to be my calise not anyone else hope you
guys can help a fellow dog out p.s i was wondering what was your take on han from fast and furious to
me he was always my favorite because he had sick fucking flow was banging arguably the hottest
mega bib in the series gal gadot i felt like after fast and furious one and two paul became less of a
stoke machine and less more of a serious guy anyways peace elliot first off
han is a beast and i think his cool relaxed attitude while also pulling chicks was comparable
to not on paul's level but almost so major props to han um but yeah dude i think you know you've
got you have feelings for this girl tell her how you feel go for it yeah you're telling us not to tell you like obvious stuff but dude there's no magic to this shit like you just gotta sit her down
or maybe you don't even have to sit her down but one night when you guys are out lock in talk to
her and then at some point say hey do you want to come into my room and make out yeah and she'll be
like what are you serious and he'll be like yeah i'm dead serious dude the makeout invitation is
always a solid move it's very benign and you know just letting letting them know how you feel take it for a good
time and then suck face joe p as a fellow fast and furious oh this is from our dog joe p as a
fellow fast and furious fan i was curious to know your thoughts on the movie point break i'm talking
about the original 1991 classic with the legends pat Swayze and Keanu Reeves,
not the 2015 Atroxity.
For the little groms who are too young to remember
or know the movie,
it is essentially a cut-and-paste plot,
but instead of racing cars,
insert surfing and skydiving.
And instead of Paul Walker and Vin Diesel,
insert Keanu Reeves and Patrick Swayze.
I know my dogs have seen both,
so my question is this.
Point Break or the first Fast and Furious,
franchise not included?
Now, before you answer, Chad, here's a little reminder of some of the
cast in point break, Anthony Kiedis, John Philiband, turtle from North shore, Lori Petty
and Gary fucking Busey. I am so sorry to put you bros on the spot like this, but these are the type
of questions that run through my head on a daily basis. Keep up the great work, bros. Fuck Puzio
and fuck that sandbag and bitch boy from the previous pod
we haven't decided yet if we're gonna name that guy sandbag and bitch boy or pistols
so weigh in guys yeah with what you think is a better nickname i like sandbag and bitch boy
yeah pistols i think that gives them a little too much credit all right chad you've been put
on the spot the parameters of the question have been set which film do you prefer
dude i mean in this instance it looks like all the cards are against me you know this is a movie
about surfing with a fire cast but i will not betray paul fast and the furious i mean i love
point break don't get me wrong dudes and i love the way the lieutenant talks about coming
lieutenant talks about how how much cum Keanu Reeves has
and just the whole surfing vibe and all that stuff.
But Fast and the Furious is something I can watch every day
for the rest of my life, so I'm sticking with Fast and the Furious.
Let me say thank you for the scholarly question, Joe.
Yeah, thank you.
These are the kind of conundrums that we're afraid to take on but are absolutely necessary for our development, you know?
Because you've got to make tough calls if you want to be a big dick baller and just a nice guy.
I am going point break.
In a world where we're confined to uncomfortable workspaces, where so much of our God-given natural yearnings are curtailed, that sometimes the only way to truly be free is to live radically.
That's an excellent point.
And I'm kind of using the wrong terminology, too, because Patrick Swayze says at one point they only live to get radical so they'll never understand the gift.
I think this brings to light – and I don't want to make assumptions here.
But I think with movies what you gravitate towards the most is like the overall message or like the way it makes you feel.
Is that correct?
Like the,
the philosophy or the,
I think for me it's the characters.
So when I saw Fast and Furious,
I was like,
I want to be like Brian O'Connor.
When I watch Point Break,
I'm like,
I don't really want to be like either of those guys,
Bodhi or Keanu. I think Point Break, I'm like, I don't really want to be like either of those guys, Bodhi or Keanu.
I think, yeah, I don't know if there's a moment in Point Break
that says,
that says like a kind of poignant as when Vin,
as when Vince talks about when he attacked the guy
who killed his dad in the race, you know?
And he talks about his 10 seconds of freedom.
Hey, bro, so recently in firefighting training,
I had a really bad injury.
I'm sorry, man.
Thank you for what you're trying to do.
That involved me degloving my heel and almost losing my foot.
Wow.
I've already had two surgeries,
and I'm on my way to a full recovery, most likely.
Because of this injury, I'm on bed rest
and can't do very much.
It's already been five weeks of just being in my room,
which sucks because I am not a home buddy.
The first few weeks were nice and restful,
but recently I've started to get really frustrated
that I can't do anything.
You guys have any tips on how to keep my stoke up
in the painfully boring time?
Love you, bro.
Alex.
I think I would look to you in this instance
because of
your extensive vocab i'd say hit the books my man get educated yeah dude read barbarian days it's a
memoir about surfing and growing up and it's uh it's really well told and i think you'll relate
to a lot of it even if you're not a surfer really getting a good story you'll you'll feel like you're
kind of being taken away. One of my biggest regrets
is I didn't read as much when I was a kid, so
hit those books.
Get
learned. And chicks are impressed
if you read. What up, bros? I got
a serious situation on my hands. Ever since I came
into this world, my stoke sack has
always been a little empty. In other words,
I only have one nut. I've kept it a secret
all of my life until one wild night with the boys. They were blown away by the fact that I've been lugging
around one massive stone the whole time. They think it's awesome and love to crack jokes,
which honestly has made us closer. No girl has ever known though. I guess it really isn't that
noticeable given the fact that the few women who have played with my paddle ball set haven't said
anything. It just kind of gets me down thinking that a girl won't be chill when she learns that
I'm a Lance instead of Neil. Do you guys think girls really care when they're on the tour de france
versus the first space mission of the moon i'm curious as to what you guys think i'd ask no one
else for advice on this unless they were savvy vets like you too much love keep the pads come
keep the pods coming jake dude as long as you own it and you just be like yeah dudes i have one nut
and own it be proud of it you know love it and I think I don't think I
don't think the key is not to worry about what they'll think or what other people will think
about your lack of nut I think it's to um just be proud of who you are and uh you know let that
confidence bleed through yeah dude I don't think you have to go as far as I would go like I'd
change my Instagram to like one nut Jake and just like get out in front of it
and really like almost throw it in people's faces that I'm like proud of what I have.
But yeah, I think you do.
There's zero shame in this.
I think you're just as strong as any man with three nuts and you're going to prove it every
day in the way you live your life.
Because that's really what having nuts is about.
It's about putting them on the table and living right.
And I also think that, dude, we respect Lance Armstrong more because of what he accomplished with one nut.
And I also know a guy, Gavin Escobar, who plays tight end.
I think maybe he still plays for the Cowboys, who has one nut.
And he's playing NFL tight end.
And no one thinks less of him because of that.
We all respect him more.
playing NFL tight end and no one thinks less of him because of that. We all respect him more.
So whatever you're able to accomplish in the face of the obstacles that life has provided you is only going to define you more as a stronger and better and more heroic person.
So charge into life with this one nut and show us all what a man can do.
Hey bros, I love the podcast and have a predicament. So here's the sitch. I was
smoking with my weed inexperienced bros, Adam and Ben and at Ben's house. My one friend, Adam, obviously greened out. He act all over a bed, nothing smells and there's no evidence So here's the sitch. and a whole pizza Adam ordered and forgot about after the vomit cannon was fired. He admitted the weed, but now he's grounded for a month,
but summer vacation is in a week.
How do we keep the stoke in the friend group up
if we are down a member of the clique?
Thanks.
Also, Chad, you really bring the ethos,
and par brings the reality.
A perfect duo.
Thank you, dude.
Thank you, dude.
Plan something together
to when your buddy gets out of the doghouse.
Maybe have something to look forward to, you know.
Maybe plan like a trip to like a water park where you do mushrooms.
I don't want to encourage you to do drugs, but yeah,
maybe plan a trip so you guys can all just sort of like froth on that
until he's out of the doghouse.
And then you go like water skiing or jet skiing or something.
And then you all just sort of, you know, fire it up together and become beasts.
JT?
You're down a man.
So every dude in the crew brings their own unique skill set
and their own unique attributes.
So everybody in the crew is going to have to personally chip in,
emotionally, personally, socially, to make up for the loss. And you guys
are just going to have to congeal as a new team and still win ball games while one of your studs
is away. That was beautiful. And make sure, you know, keep him abreast. Don't forget about him
when he's grounded. He's going to be feeling isolated. So, you know, make sure you're texting
him and, you know, not like giving him FOMO, but definitely trying to let him know that he's gone but not forgotten
and that you guys are eagerly awaiting his return.
And then also, if you guys step up in his absence,
then when he comes back, the whole team will be stronger because of it,
and you guys will be able to do even more work out there in your world.
As always, this podcast is brought to you by Douglas Zubikant.
If you're boning make sure
you bone with douglas because that'll make it smooth and uh thank you guys so much for writing
in make sure to join our patreon for bonus content um keep writing reviews we love those keep writing
in questions sorry if we didn't get to yours we're trying to get to them all but there are a lot of
questions so we're working towards my dogs and uh stay stoked guys thanks so much for tuning in episode 19 yes
sir episode 19 of the going deep chatting jt podcast later dudes sorry for my snivels
you