Going Deep with Chad and JT - EP 259 - Dillon Francis on Calvin Harris and Chad's Real Identities!
Episode Date: October 5, 2022What up stokers?! This week we got the legend Dillon Francis on the pod.  Get 20% Off and Free Shipping with the code [GODEEP] at Manscaped.com. That’s 20% off with free shipping at manscaped.com,... and use code [GODEEP].  Head to Titan.com/GODEEP, and you’ll get a free $25 investment into another one of Titan’s portfolios. Â
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Manscaped, clear out the leaves.
It's your tree trunks.
Time to shine.
Let's start the show.
What's your theme?
Go deep.
Chat and change.
My elocution is better.
Oh, fuck.
Your what?
Elocution?
Elocution.
That's added to my dictionary right now.
Add it, dude.
Dude, JT will add vocab to your... I like it.
Yeah, I'm big on it, dude.
Your vernacular is going to be hot.
I can't wait.
I just scribble down words every day.
I'm like, I'm going to toss these out.
You're going to use this one in?
Mm-hmm. Yeah. He taught me constituents constituents what's it what does that mean i don't know is that is that uh like uh your group your constituents i think so yeah i think politically
it's like your squad okay is that right politically yeah the squad behind me. Are you very political? Am I?
Not really.
I kind of want to move to Norway.
I've been talking about that.
I've been talking about moving to Copenhagen.
Copenhagen's great too.
Where is that?
Is that in Denmark?
Yeah, Denmark.
That's all in Scandinavia.
Yeah, they seem like they got it figured out over there. They do.
Except Stockholm right now.
Because they got some crazy racist people.
Oh, really?
Oh, yeah.
Everyone's getting a little more nationalist, right?
Yeah, they are.
Everyone's like, we got to shut it down.
Enough of this multicultural dream.
Yeah.
It's us against them.
Dude, that's exactly what's happening there.
It just sways that way.
I mean, it goes back and forth.
Yeah, you kind of think progress is always going to go in this direction.
No, the pendulum has to go back and forth.
It can't be just progress forever. forever we gotta have one person to just throw
a wrench in the wheel and be like nah man we're going back a couple days there's gotta be a tug
of war there yeah have you ever dj'd out in like eastern europe yeah yeah i've i actually was i did
norway recently i forgot what where i played it was like christ christiansen land christiansen
land is that a festival or a place?
You're talking the wrong guy, dude.
I thought you meant religiously.
Well, I feel like the warehouse parties out there
and stuff like that look pretty nuts.
I've done those before, like London,
but not recently.
I haven't been back to London in a while.
Do screams, like when the whole crowd roars in Norway,
is there an accent? I'm being serious to you
Dude, I guess it's dumb. But can you hear a difference in there like do roars in different countries sound different?
They all sound the same now. I want
It sounds the same everywhere sounds the same everywhere it sounds the same
everywhere
the one that's the
funniest is
in like Scotland
and
anywhere in the
in like London
England
UK
I don't know why
I said it like that
but I did
so I'm gonna own it
I was like
it sounded
London
England UK
they say
they do whoop there it is
whoop there and it's throughout the whole
show it'll like it'll die down and then it'll come
back real big like what is it so the whole
crowd will just go whoop there it is
yeah that's pretty cool
it's really good because then you know if they're into it
if they're not saying that at all at your show you're like
alright this is bad
are you like acutely aware I'm gonna put it up next time are you like acutely
aware of of because i guess with stand-up you know it's like you get laughs yeah but like i've
always wondered when you're doing like a show like do you feel it when the audience is really into
it yeah oh for sure yeah you can tell yeah you can tell when it's like like i bet there's crowds
that you've had to like break you know to finally get
on your side totally so that happens a lot uh not a lot actually like vegas is very much that place
though if they're not into it at the beginning you've got to break them by playing songs that
they that they know and love a couple times so that they'll be like holy crap man this guy just
played like beyonce into jay- Jay-Z into Calvin Harris into this.
I love this dude now.
So then that's where you can literally say anything
and they're like, this guy's so funny, I don't care.
Or this guy's so good at music, I don't care.
So do you have your break in case of emergency?
Like a playlist that will always resuscitate the crowd?
Oh, yeah.
What's on that?
It's this edit that I have of Calvin Harris.
It's his song Slide, but it has Beyonce's single edit that I have of Calvin Harris it's his song slide but it
has Beyonce single ladies put onto it whoa it's like one of the best edits
I've ever made I think slides one of my favorite songs yeah and then when you
add Beyonce I mean come on all the single ladies Frank Ocean what a singer
so good yeah he put so much soul into it yeah can you back to the accent thing
like that cuz with british
music you can't hear that they're british when they're singing no you can't at all no it all
sounds like it's from the same place i mean even actors too that kind of pisses me off sometimes
can you do any accents uh i can do like a good australian one oh i have a good one too yeah
let's hear it no no dude how you going long did... I'm actually really bad at it.
How long did it take you to get here, mate?
For me, it was a three-hour drive.
Fuck, mate.
I was going down to the servo, and I got me a ciggy, and I don't know.
No, keep going.
No, it's good.
What, you chiefed your cigarette?
I did like a...
I'm trying to think of all the good...
The Bogan people from Australia have...
Bogan.
They're like Pauly Shore.
Yeah. I feel like theyauly Shore. Yeah.
I feel like they have the best little...
What's the word?
A lingo?
Quips.
Oh.
Yeah, lingo and quips, too.
They let it rip fast.
They got something for everything.
Yeah, everything's just off the dome, and they don't care.
Welsh people are like that, too.
But you can't even understand them.
No.
They're like...
I learned a good rule of thumb for Australia accents. The E-R is say bada yeah that's very true i did a pilot presentation where i had to
have an australian accent i think i'm the reason they didn't go because my accent was like i was
like oh cranky they're like this guy's australian i'm just like why'd you hire me i mean that could work though
sometimes in your favor of like it being so bad that it's good right yeah jt and i did the scene
where he's like a drug dealer and we both had like a day to learn australian accent
jt's like you want some drugs mate you know i was being bad on not on purpose but i was like
my only option is to lean into this yeah i think I think I just looked around and I was like, fuck it.
And then I was like, you want drugs, mate?
I might.
It's really, I just, I gnarled my face up a lot.
I think that helps with accents.
If you're like, I want you wanting drugs, mate.
It helps, though.
The director after, he's like, very good commitment.
We'll be calling you guys, maybe, someday.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
I just got to say, your voice is like Xanax is it dude yeah burt kreischer said both you're actually you know both your guys's voices are
kind of like very like soothing he called us xanax yeah he said hanging out with us was like
hanging out with the xanax who said that burt kreischer yesterday yeah he's absolutely right
oh i feel like really calm right now really Really? Yeah, that's so nice. I appreciate that. Thank you. I always, in like podcasting, like,
I'm always like, do I need to be more like energetic? Do I need to be sort of like... No.
No? Thank you. No. I worry about that too, yeah. It's like, do we need to
turn it up? I actually turn down when I get on a podcast. I think it's great.
If you talk to me off camera, I'm like, what's up? I'm getting like more comfortable.
Yeah, relax, man. Take a load off. Whatever you need to do. camera, I'm like, what's up? I'm getting more comfortable. Yeah, relax, man.
Take a load off.
Whatever you need to do.
Are you for real right now?
I'm for real.
Dude, thank you.
I feel good.
Yeah, let's just chill.
We don't even have to talk.
If the conversation ebbs and flows, we can edit it.
Whatever you guys want to do.
Yeah, I love your style, by the way.
You're rocking the Vans.
Thank you.
Similar, good pants, good tee.
Yeah.
I feel like we mesh well.
We have similar fashion.
I think, well, I mean, we're kind of all from,
I'm born and raised Los Angeles,
and I think we all kind of did the same thing growing up
because, as I was saying, I tried to surf.
Didn't go well for me.
I can longboard.
I was a dick dragger.
I will say that.
Nice.
Not proud of it.
But I could do drop knee, and I could do a 360. So that was like the only redeeming thing I had to like any surfers. So like if anyone were like, cause I used to go to Hawaii a lot to surf with my, my dad. And at that time, that's when I got, I got stuck on a rock with a shortboard and I just abandoned it forever. So I went, I was, I would always go out to like the surf spots as a boogie boarder and
when i did drop knee everyone was like you know what it's not locals only you're a local now it's
legit or i guess it is locals only still but yeah but you're a loke yeah exactly that's cool yeah
dude i remember guys on their like myspace profiles would put like 60 drop knee 40 prone
like they'd put their ratio for how often they did either.
That was like how they identify.
Holy shit.
Those were their pronouns.
I wish I would have known to do that.
Yeah, it was important to know that about your crew.
Yeah.
What their style.
I was definitely 60% drop knee.
Nice.
So that helps.
You want to be over 50.
Yeah, definitely.
If you're doing more prone, like that's not good for your body dude i wikipedia'd you your dad was in alternative medicine yeah what does that entail
so anything from like chinese medicine uh chinese medicine really and then like he studied in japan
for uh i think it was like three months and then China for two years and
does acupuncture. Uh, he used to do massage. He still sort of does. Um, but like cupping
or anything like that, but he does like Eastern meets Western medicine. So like if, if whatever
he can't do, whatever he can do in Eastern won't work for you, then he'll be like, Hey, okay, look,
you know, you got to go take
antibiotics for this because i don't have any chinese medicine that's really going to get rid
of this so so he starts with the eastern stuff yeah fail safe he's got the uh the western stuff
exactly that feels like the right process yeah and then a lot of it's like lifestyle change too
yeah did he uh incorporate that into you like your childhood your childhood, organic foods and all that kind of stuff?
Yeah.
I had to like, man, we had to take these pills called, what were they called?
They were like the most disgusting green pills and they were tiny.
You had to take 20 of them for breakfast and it tastes like you were just throwing like-
20?
Yeah.
Would you take them one at a time or how many would you throw in at the same sometimes you would do one at a time
because dude all 20 when you're a kid and it's like it tastes like wheatgrass mixed with grass
mixed with like soil and broccoli and probably like spirulina or something like that so it's
just like these awful green tastes and as a, you already hate broccoli and all that stuff.
So you would try to do like the full one.
And sometimes you would throw up.
Yeah.
My brother and I.
That's badass.
So then sometimes like the one by one would just feel so much better because you're not like.
If you both, would he make you readminister?
Yeah.
Really?
That's funny you ask that.
No, I know my friend, his dad, different thing.
But my friend's dad was like a psycho weightlifting coach.
Oh, my God.
And he would give his kids muscle milks every morning.
No.
And one day he looked into the back of the kid's car
and he saw eight undranken muscle milks,
and he drove over to where his kid was at his friend's house,
and he made him drink all eight muscle milks in front of him.
Hilarious.
On the moment.
And no surprise, that kid doesn't weight lift or play sports yeah no he went the other way he was like it's not worth it if my
dad's gonna be you know uh forcing me to take protein after drinking eight muscle milks i don't
think you'd be able to drink any protein shake no you're done it's kind of like that thing where
it ruins it when you get like my brother got sick on enchiladas
He doesn't eat enchilada exactly. Although I heard recently he went back to him
She's honest, but it'd been like 15 years. Do you that's that's a long time dude long break
Did you rebel against that sort of lifestyle? Are you into it now? I tried to yeah
So I'm into it now tried to when I was younger
Dude, I used to have temper tantrums of like why can't we be like everybody else and
go to gelson's right or like bristol farm there's this place actually called mrs gooch's oh nice i
don't know if you've ever heard of this i guess it only existed in la horrible name yeah for a
health food restaurant i mean it's you know it's that's the undercarriage of your balls yeah gooch is is it the mom's taint i thought
it was the guys well i just say missus i assume it's oh yeah it's like this is mom's taint it's
like a very small tiny taint but because they have like a longer taint we've been talking about
taints a lot so we're kind of experts oh yeah what is it some chlorella is that a good damn
how did you find that that's what? That's what you had to eat.
Those I think might be... Good find. Oh yeah, no.
That's it. That's exactly them.
Do you take them now? I should.
I stopped taking them.
You seem like a healthy guy. I'm trying
to be. Actually, I recently
got a blood test done. I knew I was
eating a lot of sugar.
My girlfriend
were addicted to sugar me too it's bad
we were eating like a pizookie a week from bj's no we were making it on our own that's so fun
it's so fun it's so good what's a pizookie oh it's a pizza cookie yeah it's a cookie and you put
vanilla ice cream on top yeah and you're supposed to eat it with a group of like five people,
but it was just me and my girlfriend.
That's so nice.
And it was great, except for I got my blood work done recently
and I'm like pre-pre-diabetic.
You got two pre's.
I got two pre's.
Good.
Stay there, brother.
So it's good, yeah, but it's also bad because it was like 0.1
and I was going to be pre-diabetic.'s tough cuz like I've given up a lot of stuff like a lot of drugs and a lot of bad behaviors
And then here sugar I think is just always like the last house on the block where you're like
Well, if I give this up, what do I have left?
Like I need to be fucked up on something or else then if you feel miserable you have nothing to blame you like
I guess this is just existence
It's nice to have sugar like what's the's the fucking sugar well dude i i quit coffee
i don't drink i haven't drank for nine months now whoa um the only thing i do now is like
microdosing mushrooms how often um uh i do a one month on one month off i just do what my friend
kurt tells me to do.
He's the shaman.
He's a legend.
Yeah.
Do you feel a difference?
I do.
I feel happier.
And like,
I feel,
um,
I feel like more inspiration,
uh,
than,
than I used to.
So it's like,
it's definitely helping fire whatever neurons it needs to.
Shoes are the best.
Yeah.
Of all the drugs drugs i think they're
the best but i can never microdose because i'm just i'll do a little bit i'm like i'm not feeling
shit and then by the end of the day i'm just like really effed up you're just dosed i'm just on
mushrooms i mean there's a lot of people that do that though as well so yeah when rogan got
canceled the last time somebody asked him they were like how did you get through it he's like
i did mushrooms every day for like two weeks. And I was like, God bless you.
That's how I started microdosing.
My friend, uh, my friend, Matt Wilson,
he was sober for God knows how long, long time.
Like he runs with the tour management circle that I, that I'm with,
or well that my tour managers with. And, um, and during COVID,
he like got into mushrooms and was making them not taking them
and then through talking and researching him he was like man you know what i'm pretty depressed
right now through covid and everything sucks and like i don't have a job so i'm just gonna
i'm gonna take i'm gonna microdose and he microdosed and he was like i've never felt
happier the whole time i was doing it wow and then now he has like his whole little microdosing regimen kits and and yeah he's making like little chocolate bars now i got
some in my bag i have to take a little break because last time i took him i got into an
argument with my girlfriend so i'm like all right i gotta take a break but but i'm excited for the
next time i'm probably like a month away from it but i, me too. Yeah, I'm like this. Yeah, that's going to be fun.
I'm going to ride a scooter that day.
Was it hard to, with your lifestyle,
was it hard to step away from partying and drinking and all that kind of stuff?
No, I did a lot of it.
Because being born and raised in LA, I feel like you start really yeah like really young it's like
the movie 13 yeah i mean i didn't start at 13 though but i i mean i think i did enough for
for myself maybe maybe there's if another person was in my shoes like it wouldn't have been enough
for them but i i think like i started going out like 16 17 and you know i did my array of drugs and and drinking so um and then as i got into
um what's it called as i got into djing and starting to get a career before that happened
i had to go to a life coach um the story is like very intricate, but basically to speed through it, I'd learned how to make music in Atlanta and I came home and I'd already not been going to community college.
I dropped out.
And so, and I came back home to my parents.
I was like, look, I learned how to make music in Atlanta for three months.
Let me just stay in the back house and make music for a whole year.
If you put 10,000 hours into something, you can become a master at
it. And I won't do anything but that. And my dad's like, all right, cool. I like this idea. And if it
doesn't work, you go back to college and you're going to be paying rent here. And if, if, uh,
and if you're staying here as well, you have to go and see a life coach. So I was like, all right,
cool. Sounds like a good deal. So I stayed in the back house for a year, just working on that. And
I had to go see this life coach. And every single time I saw him, the main thing he kept pile driving into my head was like,
if you don't drink as much as the people that are in the business that you're in,
you're going to be leaps and bounds ahead of them because your whole business is that you get free drinks and free whatever you want.
So if you stay away from all that stuff, you're going to be really good.
How did he know that?
Was he,
he's been through everything.
Like he's a life coach.
That's like done everything.
He was gay,
bisexual,
married,
divorced,
everything.
Like he,
he has gone through life where he's like,
I can literally tell you what you need to do in any situation.
That was such a funny list of what he's done in his life.
It was all in the same wheelhouse.
Look, this guy had the bona fides.
He fucked dudes.
He fucked chicks.
He fucked one dude.
Then he fucked a lot of dudes.
I'm like, all right, that checks out.
But then he's like built his own businesses.
He'd gone through all the arrays of everything.
But honestly, that does matter to me too. like if someone had a diploma up in their office like my psychologist he's like i fucked a
thousand people man i've been married six times i'm like this guy's been through some shit he gets
it he's got the life experience quota matched i mean that is like i mean a big part of our life
experience is just like us wanting to find a partner and settle down I think I'm reading this book about like how society evolves and it's all
built off of like just trying to create relationship harmony yeah basically all
violence in the past was like dudes being jealous or or not getting laid
basically and then wars just broke out like hey we need to create like religion
and governments and economies to keep this shit.
All because of not getting laid.
Yeah, to quell.
Dude, I had a similar thing, though, when I started doing comedy.
It was like, I quit drinking for, like, three years.
Oh, nice.
And I was told, like, the same thing of, like, I never go on stage drunk.
My first, my second time, I was blacked out.
Oh, my God.
How did that go?
I don't know.
Well, I think I'm, like, a very nice drunk, so I was just on stage just, like, saying nonsense.
But it was so funny because it was, like, I just started comedy, and, like, Andy Dick was on the show.
Oh, wow.
And I was, like, telling everyone, like, dudes, I'm doing a show with Andy Dick.
You know, it's, like, one of those first things where people are, like, what?
And then, but, yeah, but yeah then i like quit drinking and then like
there's something about uh being all around all of that but like being sober and then like
learning your craft yeah and it just felt like everything compounded in like cohesively yeah
makes sense no as you're more present yeah for what you're doing then like if you're drunk
you just think that everything is good in that moment yeah there's nothing for you to really
better yourself from that but when you're sober like there's one thing that that i'm not gonna
notice that you're gonna notice in your set that will technically probably make you a better
comedian even though i wouldn't be like oh that thing that he did was bad but it's something that
you're gonna be like all right well next time I'm not going to do that.
I'm going to say this and I'll get it like a little bit better of a laugh.
Yeah.
Like even for myself, like DJing, I'm like, oh, OK, that mix worked when I was drunk because anything works when you're drunk.
Yeah.
Because you don't feel anything.
Yeah.
Like you're just listening to something.
You're like, oh, well, I really like the next song.
So like even though it's just completely out of key, this works for me.
I can imagine, too, if you're like hammered too you're just like man i am crushing it
you're like everyone's loving it dude and then like you look at a video and there's
just like you know like a totally because if you're on the aux cord at a party and you're
hammered you think you're just like oh yeah you think you're a guy laying down the hits i mean
i have done some really funny things though uh being very
drunk yeah um like one time at a festival i was playing uh there's this genre called melbourne
bounce it was a huge this the song was a huge song and uh like even at the drop it says everybody
everybody make it bounce and what you would do is you'd bounce to that yeah and so i was i was so
drunk and i really just wanted to listen to t-pain buy you a drink yeah and my friend travis was right
on the side and we both love that song so i was like you know what people aren't gonna bounce
today so i echoed the song out and i just played like dude biggest shift in bpm change yeah and i
just played buy you a drink and i just got
on the mic and said y'all just got fucking t-pain motherfuckers and it worked out yeah it did work
out yeah like the combative nature of it i mean there was definitely some people that were very
bummed on molly that were like i just ruined their whole like you know the momentum of of whatever
like part of the roller coasteraster they were on for themselves.
But for me,
I felt great.
Did you,
do you do that a lot during your sets where you're like,
all right,
the audience expectations are going this way.
And for my own personal fulfillment,
I need to jack it in the other direction.
I think I was,
no,
that was,
that was a very like in the moment thing of like,
man,
I just feel like really listening to this song.
Have you ever
been combative with the audience sometimes sometimes like sometimes the audience won't
be into it and you're like you know what if you're really not going to be into it i'm just
going to play for myself and then you just end up playing songs that really nobody's into what
are those songs i guess you don't want to say because it would but like what's a or what's a
genre of music that doesn't work at a festival?
Man, that's a good question.
I don't know if I would do that at a festival.
Like I think more of the times that that happens is it really depends on like if you're playing like a club night.
That's like very much like a club.
That's like a supper club that like they have their clientele that come in and, and just want to do like bottle service.
And that's it.
Like sometimes that's where a place where most people aren't going to see me, they're
going to like ball out and it's the experience.
Yeah.
They want the experience rather than like, I'm going to go see Dylan Francis play a show.
Yeah.
Their focus isn't on you.
Exactly.
So then during that, it would be like more playing like fun deeper
house stuff um that that's usually like where i'm just playing for myself or like playing weirder
stuff that i that i haven't even tried yet have you ever seen a couple on the verge of hooking up
but you didn't know if they were going to get all the way there and then to throw an assist to the
dude you put on the perfect song to get that moment?
No.
You just made me, I'm going to look now.
Yeah, because if I was you,
I'd feel like I was kind of like engineering
what was happening out there.
That's a really good idea.
I need to do that.
Are you watching the bottle service people?
No, no, not really.
What are you looking at?
Sometimes I'm just like looking around.
Oh, nice lights. Yeah. not really what are you looking at sometimes i'm just like looking around yeah i know if you're being the ceiling's tall sometimes i do yeah no that makes sense
yeah you look around those clubs you're like holy fuck yeah i i know if because do you look in the
do you look in everyone's do you this is a good question do you like look directly into someone's
eyes occasionally a couple times a set you do sometimes I?
But then I feel weird cuz I'm like wait, but what this person thinks I'm like intimately looking at them
You are
But I don't want to be why not
I'm taking oh
Well, yeah, it doesn't have to be you. I guess I contact is
You're staying a one one person the whole time.
Some fat dude.
Dude, he might think that I'm into him.
Right.
And then I got to explain later on.
Robin Williams was doing a play one time.
He made hard eye contact with me,
and that literally made me feel like I could be a comedian.
That's amazing.
It did kind of mean a lot to me.
Okay, so now I got to do that.
He just stared at me, and I was like,
he sees that I can do it.
I could be making DJs while you're making comedians.
Exactly.
I saw Damon Albarn
at the Gorillaz.
We were at Life is Beautiful Festival.
One of the best festivals ever.
And he grabbed some guy by his face
and he's singing to him.
And the guy was totally into it
where he's just like, oh, oh. But I feel like me, I'd be like, because you're on the guy the guy was totally into it where he's just like oh oh but i
feel like me i'd be like i'd be like because you're on the jumbotron you know and i'd be like
i feel like look around be like thanks dude like i don't know how i don't know how i would react
um if fred durst did that to me i'd i'd fuck you'd be you'd be into it i'd be like oh oh
i want you to break stuff and And I'd be like, oh.
I think it's different for a singer.
For a DJ, we're not doing, like, we're playing records.
Right.
We're doing some stuff.
Yeah.
But, like, that's where I think for a singer,
I feel like it's a little bit, like, more showmanship.
But I feel like if I'm staring at somebody,
I feel like someone's just like.
No, you got a nice, dude,
especially if you haven't been drinking for nine months, I can feel the light in you Yeah, it's it's light. I think it would be light. All right, good. Yeah, I think i'm gonna start doing it more
I'll take some videos and if you really do let me know
Yeah, i'd like to see it if I were in the crowd taking everything I learned from this podcast
I'm going to apply it to real life
If I were in the crowd
And like it's about to drop and you pointed at me
I would lose my mind. All right, I'm gonna add that one in. Yeah, the genre. I'm really bad at that
I truly am like really bad at that sometimes cuz like I think
And I have been thinking about this like breaking out like
this I have a safe space and the safe space is like being behind the CDJs and like just like
vibing on my own.
And like, I'll look at I'll scan more so than like eye contact.
But but yeah, I'm going to do that now.
I'm going to make more eye contact and I'm going to point on the drop of something.
It's got to be a dude.
Yeah.
I'm going to do everybody.
Yeah.
Yeah.
No discrimination. I might just do do one of these yeah yeah yeah
sending people ablaze the genre of music i i won't be able to pronounce it correctly i'm sorry
i'm sure you have to correct people all the time i'm excited to hear it well i was just going to
say it's very good tone in the house right yeah and it's called i want to say mama fuko but that's not it there's not even an f in it no what is it moomba tone
moomba tone moomba tone that's not that hard moomba tone yeah um it's like reggaeton and then
the the original the original song that like created the genre this um afrojack afrojack made the remix of this song called moomba and
then this guy dave nada one of my friends he slowed it down and uh put it at 108 and then
called it moomba tone and then that's how the genre name was born do you listen to that when
you're yeah i like i like that stuff yeah because I never watch comedy really. Yeah. Yeah, because I don't, for whatever reason,
maybe it's just because I see so much of it.
That's, no, okay, so yes, I don't listen,
like I don't listen to that much electronic music
when I don't have to.
What do you normally listen to?
Bossa Nova.
What's Bossa Nova?
Bossa Nova's like really relaxing jazz.
Walter Wanderly is like the greatest organist ever.
And he's like one of the main dudes in,
in Bossa Nova.
And the organ is,
which instrument is that?
Um,
it's the,
it's piano.
Oh,
okay.
It's like the church.
Yeah.
Oh,
nice.
And that's your favorite thing.
I've definitely heard one of his songs before.
I have?
Yeah.
Okay.
When you hear it,
it's,
it's like,
it's,
it's elevator music.
And that's what you like to listen to? Love it's like it's it's elevator music and that's what
you like to listen to love it just because you want to be in a peaceful place makes me so happy
i i swear to god try this one time and then let me know how it works put on a bossa nova playlist
when you are making breakfast or something and you're starting your day i swear to god you'll
be happier so you're not even are you listening to it because you like the musical arrangement
or yeah or you listen to it just because of the effect that or because you like the musical arrangement? Yeah. Or are you listening to it just because of the effect?
Or both?
I love the musical arrangement.
I like that it's not jazz jazz.
Nobody really likes jazz.
Hard to listen to.
Hard.
Especially with all the random key changes.
Jumps and stuff.
You're like, hey, man, relax.
Yeah.
Okay, well, calm down.
More fun to read about.
Yeah, exactly.
You read a Norman Mailer essay about it.
You're like, this shit rips.
And then you put it on and you're like, this shit's awful.
No disrespect.
I know I just don't get it.
No, I just don't get it either.
I'm sorry.
But this is like more digestible.
It's not really jazz, though.
I don't know.
It is, but it isn't.
Who are some artists that you think are kind of of overlooked like uh by people by like the masses
basically but you think are actually kind of have more to them or or worth revisiting that's a good
that's a like in in anywhere any genre any genre any genre that's a good question um the blood
brothers i feel like they got overlooked oh yeah or they
had this group called neon is it neon black i think that's what uh johnny whitney had that
i was obsessed with them i haven't listened to it in a while so maybe i'm wrong maybe it should be
over do you think people can be wrong about that stuff um like do you think there's objectively
good stuff and bad stuff yeah yeah i think i agree too
because some people will be like no it's all just subjective and i'm like to a degree but
yeah some stuff does suck some stuff really sucks and some stuff awesome yeah like the
sopranos is for sure awesome but i mean man that's you know this is a really good this is a
really good question because
like if you really think about like
Basquiat's drawings like
they are children-esque
I'm glad you brought him
up yeah I've done a couple rotations
at the Broad
and every time I go through Basquiat I'm
like it's not hitting
I'm like it's not there
is some cool stuff there's some that I really love but there's some where I'm like, all right,
this is like, this is legit. Could be like a kid drawing this. And,
and I'm not no, no shade.
The modern art stuff's tough with that.
It's tough.
Because with Picasso, I definitely see the craft and I'm like, okay,
that's a genius. I feel like I can see it every time I see a Picasso.
I'm like, that's genius. But with Basquiat, I'm like, I don't, maybe I just had to be there like New York in the
eighties and like, you know, doing some heroin.
Yeah.
I mean, yeah, there's nuance in Basquiat, you know, and, and, and there's a lot of ideas
there.
Yeah.
But I don't get him unless I read the little placard.
Exactly.
And that's a bit tough.
I mean, I've watched enough Netflix, like that if it's not explained by just this,
the placard might not save you.
Right.
And you might not win that $500,000.
That was a good pull with Basquiat, too,
because that's definitely one of the guys where I'm like, no.
Well, because I went to art school here in LA.
I went to LOXA.
And that was one of the things that we had to talk about.
We had to do constructive criticism for a lot of people's art and one of the things that always
pissed me off was boskiot because there were some kids that tried to like copy him and i definitely
noticed it wasn't as good as as him but i was but it still pissed me off because i was like i just
don't know like was is there some rich dude that's like yo these are worth
this much money and that's why they're so cool and then so and then you know through the grapevine
everyone's like basket basket i don't know what happened just the momentum of it yeah with these
with these gallery owners that are like yo we gotta pump the price of this for some reason
people love this dude i don't know why you know let's sell them for this i think it's the name
the name's great basket he was a cool dude good he's gotta be good. He was a cool, hip guy.
He was.
Like, his life, I think, probably...
I mean, the fact that he died young and that he came from a non-art background.
He was a street artist, right?
Yeah.
I mean, all of that, I think, adds to it.
Definitely.
I'm just being subjective of the art.
Me too, yeah.
Not the story.
No, story's great.
Movie, the movie's good.
Everything about it is great. that uh the movie is good everything about it it's amazing
great but that's where like going going back to what you're saying where like can like is there
bad things and is there good things like yeah i definitely think there is and there's some bad
boss got ones but then that's when again someone will just say that's subjective because there is
going to be some person that's going to be like man i love this man it's so sick and they
can explain it in a way where I then see it through their eyes.
Yeah.
But I can't convince myself that it's for me.
Yeah.
Which is,
that's the thing about getting old.
You just get comfortable not liking things.
Like I used to be embarrassed when I didn't get things.
And now people are like,
did you like that?
I'm like,
I didn't get it.
And I feel very powerful when I say that.
I'm like,
I don't get it.
Like,
you know what?
I appreciate that.
I watched Mulholland drive.
Oh wow. I need to, I need to pick that one back up again have you seen it before i saw it so long ago that's a it's a
long time ago yeah like david lynch and you're watching it and you're like
i just looked over to my girlfriend like this is a thriller this is like surreal
i'm watching it i just look over i'm like i don't know what's going on
and he's like what analysis and like what's going on and he's like way
analysis and like that's the point and you're like all right he's like i'm david lynch i meditate i
do tm like this is fucking and for 45 years he's just been churning out that he's just churning
out stuff that doesn't make sense and you're like yeah you got to go and read a reviewer to like
make sense of it but it's just their opinion as well kind of the same time period too like he hit his peak around the same time as basquiat i want to
say like 80 when was basquiat super relevant like 80s right i thought it was the 90s fuck it might
be off man is it might be the 80s though let's let's fact check that yeah let's google it
that's funny i just i just watched a movie recently what was it called I'm
not gonna remember the name who is in it but the film was nice nice Kate Blanchett
keep that her name yeah yeah yeah he was 80s cuz he died in her husband no not
from the same time it was recent okay it It was the most long drawn out movie ever. Oh, like what happened to
what the fuck?
It's about vampires.
Oh, no. Oh, Tilda Swinton.
No.
It was Cate Blanchett? Yeah.
Was it Tom Hiddleston?
No. I really want it to be that one movie.
Wait, am I thinking of the right person?
No, I'm thinking of the wrong person. It was not her.
Are you thinking about... I think I know
Is it The Last Lover's Alive by Jim Jarmusch?
No.
It's a horror movie.
Vampires. And it was put out
in 2019.
2019 Vampires.
Alright, well for the people listening...
This is a horrible segment. I'm sorry.
I'm even bringing this up
no I think this is fun
I'm gonna find it right now
this is what it is when friends hang out we google shit
I love horror movies
I'm a big like I just love
watching them at home
you a big Halloween guy?
not a big Halloween guy
I love horror movies too
do you have a favorite?
favorite definitely it's gotta be Hereditary or It Follows.
It is, right.
Hereditary was like, got me back in full force.
I tried to watch that by myself two years ago.
I watched it three times.
By yourself?
Bobby Lee was the one that, I was on his podcast.
Yeah, yeah.
And Bobby was like, dude, it's the best movie I've ever seen in my fucking life.
And I'm like, all right, I'll go see it.
And he's like, will you go see it tonight?
Yeah. I was like, yeah, let's go see it right now yeah after the podcast he took me to um the arc light we sat there and watched it and i was like
oh my fucking god yeah i need to go watch it again that's crazy and so i watched it by myself
and then i watched it with my other friend that i was like you have to go see this yeah it's that
good he has another movie coming out right who are you aster i don't know that guy i haven't seen any of his i never saw midsummer
you gotta don't midsummer's people love that one it's more dark comedy than than like scary scary
um i mean i definitely laughed at some parts like the part where they're like pushing him
into i haven't seen midsummer oh you haven't no i need to watch midsummer
it's like a horror movie during the day.
I like that idea.
What is that?
It's called House of Darkness.
Oh, I haven't seen that.
I do not watch this movie.
I'm so sorry to have put this on blast like that.
Because I also love the dude that's in it.
What's his name?
Justin Long.
Yeah, yeah.
Justin Long's in it.
It's Kate Bosworth.
Oh, Neil LaButte.
Oh, Kate Bosworth.
Neil LaButte wrote it? And, yeah. Kate bosworth oh neil labute oh yeah neil labute
wrote it and yeah kate bosworth and justin neil labute's an animal he grew up yeah they are
he where neil labute the writer he was a playwright he grew up mormon and then he would
just write these like really like scathing plays mostly about how like men being assholes and women
being bitches that's well man this is i guess that's kind of what this movie is ish really but
yeah i mean like he's they're scummy they're always really scummy he's not i unless i i like
kind of tuned out on some parts i may have but he didn't seem too scummy um well like he thinks
he's gonna have a threesome or he thinks he's gonna have a yeah threesome well first he thinks
he's gonna have sex with this girl they they go to her
house i'm gonna ruin the movie it's horrible spoil the whole thing yeah i'll spoil the whole
thing fuck that movie fuck it straight up justin long fight me which i actually i met him a long
time ago but do you think you could take him yeah for sure you just take him to the ground oh dude
i would sweep his leg so fast i watched cobra kai so that's a good show yeah if you watch martial
arts movies you can do it you can. Yeah, you should be does that
It'll be running through my head as he like comes at me and I'm like, all right cool sweep to the leg
And then punch to the heart and then you'll see the other one. You'll do this one where you like, ah the one-inch punch
Yeah, I might not do anything but I'm gonna get it off and you're gonna freak him out
Yeah, cuz he's gonna be like, holy shit. I'm about to die. Yeah, die yeah and then he's like oh you might have a heart attack just from panic yeah
exactly you could beat his ass with a dodgeball
too yes but uh but in the movie it's it's he gets to their house or her house
I think and he thinks it's just her and then they go inside the house she's like
yeah it's just me and they're talking and he he drinks a drink and and then
all of a sudden her sister
comes down and her sister's like fucking weird as well they're all just weird and he's like all
right cool and his friend calls him and asks him to like get pictures of her naked and he says no
and he's like i might have a threesome man it's crazy and then they go into another they go
upstairs and and she starts telling it dude it... Dude, nothing happens in this story as well.
It all takes place in this one spot
and no action scene happens whatsoever.
And it's just them talking.
And they ask him to tell a story.
Or they're up on the balcony
and they finally go down and start drinking some more
and they ask him to tell them a story
and he tells a story about meeting them
and then them having a threesome as a joke,
but not as a joke, you know, the guy thing. And then they're like, how about you tell a story about meeting them and then them having a threesome as a joke, but not as a joke.
You know, I think.
And then and then they're like, how about you tell a story?
And then she tells a story about them being vampires and killing people.
And then he dies.
That's the whole movie.
That's the whole movie.
Nothing else happens.
That's what happens, man.
Dude, I couldn't believe it.
Even if my girlfriend was like, what the fuck did we just watch?
I just feel like we just wasted so much of our day.
Yeah, that's a big F you to the to the audience yeah that's like him having that he
does that he has a little fun with you he like makes you feel bad for watching his stuff that's
exactly how it's because he grew up you know not being able to express himself so i think he's like
he just wants to get you to say fuck you to him he's a little bit of a sadist i think okay
then that makes more sense that's my reading on him he got it right he did it you're you're you're you read a lot huh i used to read
a lot of plays and when i was first in his stuff i thought that ugliness was the realist version
of humanity and now i'm a nicer person i'm like i don't know why i was thinking that i was like i
shouldn't have read all those fucking and then yeah it was kind of like that that was like when incel rage was
like high art oh wow yeah and now it's like we're a little more self-aware about that stuff yeah
now we're the other rage yeah like all those plays were just like incel rage yeah it was all dudes
just being pissed at chicks it's crazy does that inform your music at all no there's no incel rage
inside of me. Thank God.
Yeah, I get none of that from you.
I wonder if my music would be better, though.
Nah.
How has the scene changed since you started to now?
How has it changed?
It's really interesting to see the ebbs and flows of music going in and out of popularity um like moomba tone is not that
popular anymore i feel like what happened is major laser technically made like the best
moomba tone song because it is that it is the genre but i don't think anyone considers it that
just because it's like the best pop song ever with lean on um that's that's moomba tone yeah
that's that's pretty much it's a great song yeah
when i heard that song i like those are one of those like have you ever heard a joke where you're
like fuck i wish i thought of that yeah sure that was one of the ones where like when i heard that
i was like this is this is the one of the best songs i can picture that where were you when you
heard it um i was with diplo actually played it for me and i was like holy shit what are you doing
with this record and he's like oh yeah it's dj snake and i are making for me and I was like holy shit what are you doing with this record and he's like oh yeah it's DJ Snake
and I are making it together and I was like wow
did Diplo say like did he know
he was sitting on like
I think he did but I also think he
like I don't know if he
knew that it was going to be that
he's just in a con like he's
like so in a hamster wheel of just like
making music that
I don't think he gets caught up in ever thinking like,
all right,
this is the one.
All right,
this is the one.
I think he just,
he just loves,
he loves making music and he loves DJing.
That's what's like so inspiring about him.
And when you guys are producing together,
what's that workflow like?
Um,
he's just,
he's like,
he just knows so much about different music happening around the world
constantly.
I used to be really good at that.
And he still somehow is better than me at that.
I was better than him at a certain point in my life.
And then like he became better again.
That happens, right?
But it's crazy because I should be better than him because I'm younger.
But no, he surpasses always.
That happens with us and all of our friends too
like you'll be funnier than someone one week and then like a couple months later you're like i think
this fucker's funnier than me you're like what was i doing wrong like it uh it's it's interesting
but it's i think it's overall it's beneficial yeah absolutely to be friends and and that like
pushes you more because being competitive
and everything like that but but yeah that day he played me that record i was pissed uh he's done
that a couple times for for for some records and then i'll always do the mistake of like what are
you gonna what are you doing with that and then if he says like nothing but i'll take it let me let
me get the vocals and i'll i'll rework something and then that's when that's when he knows that's
when he knows that's where i up and he he's like oh yeah I do that with my friend
Reggie he doesn't do stand-up and he'll come up with just the most amazing jokes
I'm like you're gonna put that in anything and he's always like no I don't
think I'm gonna put anything okay okay and then like a week later my hey that
idea you had would you be mad if I talked about it in my own voice and he's like i don't know man i mean it's
flattering but i think it's yeah people but it's people get protective he doesn't for sure people
it's natural i think to be like well come on it's my idea yeah go ahead do you and diplo sort of
like came up together right or did he no he was bring you into the scene he he brought me in. He, what was it?
So I had found out that he was into that genre, Moombahton,
and I was only like recently starting to make it.
And I remember when I heard that, I hit up my manager immediately.
And I was like, hey, can you please send this record to him?
Like I heard he loves this genre right now.
And like, I feel like he's really going to like this.
I did that thing where like you con one of your friends where you're like he's really gonna like this i i did that thing
where like you con one of your friends were like hey i got i found this new record like you should
hear it yeah played it for him and he was like whoa who made this and you know you're like i did
so i did that to my friend and when that happened i was like all right cool i think i like
i think i got something yeah something good enough to be like i know that asking this favor from my manager is like the right thing to do.
So he's like,
all right,
if you really think so,
like,
you know,
that's like,
you got one shot.
They listened to the song and if they don't like it,
like you're,
you're gonna have to wait till your name gets brought up another way for them to
like you again.
So he sent it over and immediately he was like,
send me back a message.
We're like,
yo,
he loved the record.
Like would love to meet you. So I like, I followed him on, on Twitter and I was like sent me back a message like yo he loved the record like would
love to meet you so i like i followed him on on twitter and i was like hey man i heard you like
the record like what's up he's like hey where do you live and i told him i lived in la and he's
like yo come to the studio so that night oh yeah i went to the studio and we talked and i like
he wanted to just sign one record and i was like i was such a hustler at the time where I was like yeah well we could do one or like four
more yeah I already got four and like I swear they're good and they're all
moomatone and well and and then I didn't even have four right I went back
immediately to my house I just started making music right were you just like so
full of energy oh yeah cuz I just my shot this is it yeah you had like eight
miles sound oh dude do not miss I was do I put the beanie on everything and I was just rocking with my fucking
computer,
dude.
But you did it.
Yeah.
He liked those other songs.
Yeah.
And he,
and he put out the EP and,
and then from that I was able to move out of my parents' place,
get a place downtown and,
and start like making money.
And did you find it was easier to make music after that?
Once you had some momentum?
Yeah. I, yeah, I never had a like um i mean my music sucked for a year and a half like truly was just garbage and you knew it was bad yeah no no i didn't now i do but it was it was like it was the
it was i understand why it was bad now looking back at it and there there were still
elements in it where like the sounds were right just the the overall construction overall
construction wasn't right so so yeah it was bad but it was like it was everything that you needed
to get through to like to be able to make it you good song for a while yeah exactly which i didn't even know what i like i didn't know that i was making myself more technical by making songs every day like in
my head i was just like all right ten thousand hours right just got to keep doing keep doing
so you read that gladwell book and that just like reshaped what i don't think that gladwell book
when did that come out um what was that one like the tipping point or outliers outliers yeah that
was probably like oh six, I want to say.
I'll look it up real quick.
06, wow, no.
So I didn't read that.
I didn't know it came out then.
But yeah, the way that I heard about the 10,000 hour rule was A-Track.
A-Track sat in his basement when he was like 14 and did like the DMC.
I mean, that was really close.
I guess.
Yeah.
Are you bummed?
Yeah.
I mean, dude. But not that sad. emc i mean that was really close i guess yeah are you bummed yeah i mean dude i would have been like yo it came out like yesterday came out 2016 you're a good guy if i could hug you i would
but uh yeah i forgot what i was saying uh just having such a good time the 10 000 hours oh yeah
so i did the 10 000000 hours. Oh, yeah.
So I did the 10,000 hours.
But during that time, I didn't realize that you're learning structure.
You're just plugging away at these stupid songs where one day you're like,
oh, maybe I'll try this way.
And you're not realizing that you're like, oh, I'm trying this way because I heard a song subconsciously and wanted to try the structure of theirs.
Would you show the songs to your parents? Oh yeah, they hated them. Really? Yeah my mom
even came out one time and she's like can you just shut the fuck up I'm trying
to take a nap. Yeah because you were in the back house. Yeah so she could hear and her room was
right next to it. Yeah and and when you're making music it's like you're
stopping and pressing play like to get everything
right to like get the lfos right did your friends and like teachers and like surrounding people did
they believe in you um there was a couple people that did and a lot of the people that didn't that
was like fuel to the fire yeah like there was some people um that i remember them being like yeah
like very like shrugging me off yeah and it was great like i loved it because i was like all right
this is like i'm gonna prove them that i can fucking do this yeah i love those moments yeah those moments
are the best where people like you know do something i remember someone from college like
man you need to get a real job really and like yeah i just remember those specific moments where
you're like well you're like this is the like this is what tony rob talks about. This is it. This is the moment.
This is the fuel.
He just gave me a huge Duraflame.
I'm going to light that shit on fire.
I'm going to come back here and I'm going to fucking shove it in your face.
I don't know if Tony Robbins says to do that.
How's your family life?
Yeah, exactly.
Because mine's fucking great.
In school,
were you ever kicked out of class for for making
jokes yeah kicked out of school yeah he was kicked out a lot so i got kicked out a bunch and and that
was like another that was another thing where i remember kids in my high school like i i had so
much fun making people laugh like just being the outburst kid um and i would get kicked out of
class all the time and one of the things were like I remember the teachers
did like a what do you want to be when you grow up thing or like here you can
choose a couple things and I forgot which ones I chose but I remember this
girl in class was like what you can't do anything like you're just a funny guy
you're get kicked out of class all the time like what are you gonna do and I
remember that and I was like man like it's so weird that because i'm like making people laugh i'm i'm considered like an idiot right and
that was like i was lucky like the teachers would literally be like they'd be like what do you want
to be i was like i think i'm gonna be an entrepreneur they're like you should just be a
comedian you can't shut the fuck up like they kind of pushed me in the right direction but i think
you're right too like there's there's no place for that kind of personality in like a school structure and like i won funniest
at like my small high school everyone else who got a superlative got like a scholarship based
off that superlative like if you're like best athlete you go to a you go to play yeah you go
play soccer ucla you win like smartest you go to like berkeley or princeton or something like that i'm one funniest just like
you 10 junior colleges let's go like where's my scully like we get to we get to do a you know
we get to i don't know what do we get to do we get to just figure it out yeah but i was like my
parents were like very supportive too i want to ask you who do you think is the best vocalist
the best vocalist? The best vocalist.
Mo's up there from Lean On.
I've always loved her voice.
But like if we're really talking about this, Sade.
Oh, okay.
She comes around like 10, you know, 10 years at a time to tour.
Her voice is incredible.
And what do you think makes it so special?
She doesn't care about anybody except for making music
and doing tours every 10 years.
And is there a sound in her voice
that you think is...
Is it like the range that she's at
or like herself that she puts into it?
I think it's like what she puts into it
and the flow of her voice. It's just i think it's like what what she puts into it and the flow of her
voice it's just like it's so gorgeous yeah because i was like it's like as we mentioned frank ocean
is he like a good technical singer or is it more just that you feel like you can like the lyrics
that he's singing you can hear that in his voice like the pain or the frustration or the
i mean he might be a better
passion i mean i think they're both really good writers i don't know like shoddy definitely
doesn't use auto-tune um or probably tune maybe she does tune her her vocals i don't know maybe
i'm making stuff up for shoddy that i shouldn't no don't i don't know no but i mean i could be
right now someone's gonna like jump in the comments.
Yeah, someone's going to be like, yo, I actually, I redid her voice in Melodyne and I found out that these were like pushed up.
They can do that.
Yeah, maybe.
So they know if someone's tweaking their voice at all.
I mean, a lot of people do.
Like mostly everybody does actually.
At this point?
Yeah, at this point.
Everyone's like, I mean, all those Blink records were like Blink-182 was melodined.
Tom can't sing that great.
Oh, interesting.
You've seen them live.
I have a bunch.
Yeah.
Angels and Airwaves.
Yeah.
And it's not perfect.
It's good, but it's not like the records.
When did that shift?
When did we go from...
Well, I think that's always been around,
but I just don't think it was as relevant
when everyone started talking about autotune.
I think it shifted when T-Pain came out with autotune
and everyone was like,
yo, autotune's a piece of shit.
But then Kanye did the autotune album
and then all of a sudden,
every person has autotune on now.
And there's Hyperpop that has auto-tune vocals
So like because everyone points to 808 and heartbreaks is like kind of being like the peak of that
Yeah, and changing the trajectory of music post that. Yeah. Did you feel that when it came absolutely?
What was it about that? Because he was like
What he was old I feel like he did was was well kanye was like no this is like i'm gonna
make a whole fucking album that has this beautiful auto-tune on it because you know auto-tune is
beautiful it makes you sound fucking great i love like all of it or not all of it but a lot of it
yeah like you're you're in the pocket for everything so like melodically it's just amazing
for the human ears where there's no dissonance in your voice to be like, ooh, well, they were singing, you know, and their voice lifted two semitones.
And does there still have to be a good quality to your voice for it to work in auto-tune?
No.
You could sing.
So I could be Post Malone.
If you wanted to be.
But I saw Post Malone live and I was like, he's fucking amazing.
Post Malone, but that'll be the difference.
Post Malone will be able to sing beautifully
I mean you can put Auto-Tune on for your live show
they can put it on the mic
I did it on my mic one year for Hard Summer
and they put it in just one key
and it was the funniest thing ever
because I wanted to sound like Travis Scott
so I just kept saying it's lit
dude that's awesome
the first usage of Auto-Tune as we all know, is share, believe.
Is it?
Oh.
I mean, beautiful.
That's the first time I heard it.
Yeah, you're right.
Have there been any artists that you've worked with
that you've been completely starstruck by?
Calvin Harris.
Yeah.
And Skrillex.
Yeah.
Those are the two monster producers,
and when you work with
them you can just tell like their ears are trained so well um like when i was working with skrillex
like the way that he eqs a kick instantly just knows the frequency he wants and like
you know i'm not that decisive when it comes to like picking out a kick drum yeah but he is and
that's something where you're like wow you've been doing this for that long that you're like I know exactly what?
I want this this to sound like right now. Is it who's the godfather of DJing?
Godfather of DJing
Like like picking records correctly or or just like making the party be incredible
I think I think the guy who sort of launched
the EDm movement
djam probably djam yeah right oh interesting because he he really helped it with it in the
in i guess in la and i and i think the states because he was obsessed with daft punk at the
time and and he was the only dude that was playing dubstep in top 40s clubs,
and that could mix it well enough so that people weren't like,
what the fuck just happened?
And he was one that was bringing out different artists from like,
he was bringing out the Bloody Beatroots from Italy,
and Justice from France, and all them to come and and play in la so i feel like that helped a
lot and uh and he just yeah the amount that he was like pushing daft punk right yeah yeah i remember
discovering daft punk and he was also like one of the best djs just just the way that he was able to
like mix like there was i remember there was a remix of kid cuddy's day
and night and then there's a michael jackson song that has is it night and day yeah i think it's
like to beat it yeah or something it was something like that i think there's a michael jackson song
night and day maybe i'm thinking of a different record but but he basically mixes those two
together yeah and only he would be able to do that. I think I heard that in the surf video.
Really?
I think it was like to beat it, maybe.
It might have been.
He was like, the mixes he had were just mind-blowing.
Working day and night by Michael Jackson.
He was right, yeah.
Good shit, bro.
Nice.
It wasn't that beat it one.
But I watched that Clay Marzo.
That is something though
dude clay yeah clay marzo he was at macaronis in indo
and uh and um and uh yeah i've heard in college i like it was like to beat it or something i felt
i was like i can't find it yeah and i was like so good i thought i found it are you more inspired lately
by comedy or music like where's your brain at when you're like comedy right now so you're coming up
with more comedy ideas than yeah yeah and what are your influences for that um i think it's like
i was i was massively into uh in the Hall and The State.
Nice.
See, The State is something I don't always get.
Really?
Like Stella, I don't get it.
Stella, I was half and half on that.
I did really like it.
The State, I love.
But I also think that I was never into The State before it was The State.
I got into it after.
Like Wet Hot and stuff?
Yeah, exactly.
After watching that.
So I think that this is where I'm talking about.
Like after I knew the characters, I could go back and anything they did to me would be funny because I understand like the nuances of their comedy.
Right.
And I think it's like Tim and Eric, too, where like.
A couple sketches will work.
Yeah. And then it'll sink in for you and if you really understand tim and eric then you're like oh i
totally get like you know it is a lot like a lot of inside joke stuff that like you have to know
and then if you don't like once you get it then you'll be like oh now i understand why it's funny
but it's still not that funny but it is funny and then if you can understand like what the kind of logic of the humor yeah yeah but you do need like like wet hot's more mainstream than
i feel like stella's so if you watch that you can get it and then go back and be like okay now i
know what the thing is yeah exactly so and i mean even when i first saw first like the initial
episodes of kids in the hall i got confused i was like
who's this talking bird lady you know and but now it's like one of my favorite things ever
oh my god that that that's still i think kids in the hall is like my favorite i'll go back to it
yo you should it's they are their stuff was incredible that's like dave foley yeah canadians
man great comedian the funniest sctv which i haven't seen doc no it's called comedy punks was incredible. That's like Dave Foley. Yeah, Canadians, man. Great comedians. The funniest.
Really?
SCTV, which I haven't seen.
No.
It's called Comedy Punks.
It's on Amazon.
I'm going to watch that tonight.
Yeah, it's great.
Fuck yeah.
My buddy Miller showed me Letter Kenny.
Have you watched that at all?
No.
Isn't that a band?
No, it's this show.
Oh, that's Slater Kenny.
Slater Kenny.
Yeah, Cary Brownstein's band.
What was the show called?
Comedy Punks. Comedy Punks. I need to watch this. Slater Kenny, another band this show. Oh, that's Slater Kenny. Slater Kenny. Yeah, Cary Brownstein's band. What was the show called? Comedy Punks.
Comedy Punks.
I need to watch this.
Slater Kenny, another band I don't get, but they have one song that I get that I listen
to all the time.
I don't even know any of their music.
They have this song, Modern Girl, and I'm like, this is fucking shit.
I might know it.
I might know it.
They're like badass.
We can listen to it after this.
Yeah, I'm down.
Dude, that would be really nice.
Yeah, we're going to.
Cool.
Dude, it's a date.
All right, I'll see you then.
All right, perfect.
Cool.
No biggie.
I'm getting kind of hot in here.
Are you?
Yeah.
I think I'm catching a vibe.
Should I put on the AC?
No, dude, keep it on.
All right, yeah.
I want to sweat.
Yeah.
I want to feel it.
Wait, what were you going to say?
I don't know.
You were going to say something that I really wanted to hear.
Letter Kenny.
Okay, yes. Yeah, my buddy. It's a Canadian's a canadian show oh okay i'm running for like eight seasons
hold on okay i've i've heard of this i haven't ever watched it though isn't it on amazon it's
on amazon or hulu yeah it's on one of those two yeah yeah yeah but it's really really funny but
it's okay it's like sort of like schitt's creek where it's like people in america are starting to
discover it yeah but it's really it's but it's very canadian humor where they's like people in america are starting to discover it yeah but it's really
it's but it's very canadian humor where they just like i love canadian humor they yeah it's like
hockey dudes they just beat the shit out of each other they're like always fighting and uh yeah
yeah and so like yeah there's like all these like undiscovered gems in canada i gotta watch that
yeah yeah but yeah like i've been going to more I've been going to more comedy shows than I have
Like just dance music shows or anything to go see, you know, cuz usually it's great to go see how other people are performing
and
Yeah, haven't been I haven't seen any people perform except for like I went to see fahim anwar he's amazing dude so good so fucking hilarious so many
skills so many skills why he can dance so well unbelievable yeah and uh but it was his night
where he does like where he tries out material tries out material amazing and he's really
prolific he has so much material yeah it's crazy um and then i saw trevor wallace uh because he
came to vegas so he invited me to his show and I watched him.
And the thing that's so funny is I didn't know that comedians go for that long.
I'm so used to just going to the comedy store and seeing.
20 minutes.
Yeah, that's what I would think.
I mean, if I was a comedian, I don't think I would be able to go longer than 15 minutes.
Just like an hour. Yeah, you get tired of yourself. After a get tired of yourself after like i've been talking for a fucking yeah man hour
and 30 minutes is a long time he did 90 minutes yeah wow ever did yeah whoa that's a long wrong
yeah i mean i guess most of the time headliners do like an hour yeah but but people will do 90
minutes like their specials will be that maybe it was an hour 15 but but i would yeah i was blown away because i was like all right cool so like what are you gonna do it's like 20 minutes
and he's like nah an hour and i was like wait what how do you have that much material like yeah he's
a beast that's that's tough to do he's so prolific he's very inspiring he just churns out stuff i
didn't know that he was that he was a comedian before doing the youtube videos that's happening
with a lot i mean a lot of our fans don't know we do stand up it's like I think when they come to you
through those things yeah they come to the live show and they think it's gonna
be that they're like yeah they're like they'll be doing like City Council
speeches on stage I don't know if that would work I need to come to the next
live show oh yeah we did open mics trevor oh you did yeah that was recently right
uh just coming up came up with him oh okay yeah because i saw a flyer recently that um
what's his name mark marquez marquez and i was like dude i really wanted to see chad yeah yeah
i've been a big fan for a long time oh thanks so yeah all the the the paul walker thing was like
i was like this guy understands me in my body
Yeah, you met Paul. I did I did we talked about this before but yeah, I met I met Paul
Before he passed I think it was like a year before that
but I was I was dating this girl in Orange County and her brother had gotten ill and
When we went down there we we went to the hospital and I was only family members allowed inside and Paul
met with with her and and the family and because they'd all been really close and
and I don't want to go into too much detail because it's not my story to tell
but yeah I met him and he was like one of the nicest dudes ever where you're like holy shit man this guy's like super
nice super good looking drives a cool car not an asshole dude wow he seemed to have a lot of
gratitude yeah for what life had given him yeah I feel like he pops even more in life as much as he did on screen yeah yeah yeah
dude i mean the thing that's crazy is like the the way that i got like my number one song was
through his last movie really yeah because get low was the theme song for was it fast seven yeah
yeah and that was the one where he was where he passed during during that
filming so um it was crazy that like there's that connection as well yeah of of that that
happening through that so they reached out to you and they're like we're gonna put you on the
fast seven soundtrack uh yeah it was it was uh i think it's universal um they had been they were
already like kind of likeped the song in.
And they were like, do you have any other version of this song
that's cooler or something?
Because it had been out for a year or something.
And I was like, no. This is as cool
as it gets, I think.
I don't know
if I can make a cooler song.
Were you insulted?
What do you mean cooler?
I have a faster
version yeah yeah so i gave it to her and she didn't use it she ended up using the original
thank god yeah but but they were like yeah you're you're getting used in the trailer for so it was
in the trailer and that's how the song blew up even more wow yeah it was crazy yeah how did that
feel like how amazing i mean when they told me that, I was like, this is incredible.
And then you finally get the number one song in the world?
Maybe it didn't go to number one, actually.
I'm sorry.
I lied to you guys.
No, I didn't know.
I'm embarrassed.
No, whatever it went to, it was something.
It was like number five?
Hey, we're right there.
We're knocking on the door.
It was like when iTunes was around.
Dude, that was the best.
When you could just go into iTunes and see what the top 10 songs were.
Yeah, exactly. You could just know easily instead of being like, all right, is it on the Spotify charts or is it on the viral charts? was around that was the best when you just go into itunes it's yeah top 10 songs yeah exactly
you just know easily instead of being like all right is it on the spotify charts or is it on
the viral charts i don't know trust any of that stuff yeah it's much more streamlined yeah nice
but yeah that's how i fell in love with you guys was uh was through that oh thanks man
do you want to answer some listeners cues absolutely all right um
brought to you by the legends that of course at manscape manscape thank you so much for keeping Do you want to answer some listeners' cues? Absolutely. All right.
Wrote to you by the legends at, of course, at Manscaped.
Manscaped, thank you so much for keeping our trims,
for looking after our hawks,
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I'm talking about the orange part being your sack
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manscape clear out the leaves eat you tree trunks time to shine all right
let's get back to the show I'll do I I went to college briefly with a lenny um
oh really yeah I It was 2005?
It got to number five?
Which is my favorite number.
Dude, good correction, too.
You figured it out fast. I was embarrassed
and I needed to scramble in my brain.
Number one in Australia.
Number one in Australia?
Alright, perfect.
I lived in a garage my sophomore
year. Oh, wow. And El elenium i think his name is nick
yeah nick because he was only i went to santa clara university he was there for like a semester
or something but he just like appeared in our garage you know and we're like who is this dude
and he like partied with us for like a few weeks uh-huh and they stayed with my buddy mason
and then he just disappeared and he became elenium and we're like we're like you know like like five or six years later
dude out of the ashes like who was that dude where'd he go he like came into our lives and
then he just like left he disappeared and became the biggest dj in the world it became millennium
and then everyone's like do you know that Nick's millennium?
I was like, what?
And then I feel like
I'm wearing like millennium shirts.
I'm like, this is crazy.
Was he drinking at the time?
No.
Yeah.
Or yeah, because that's...
How old are you?
31.
31.
How old are you?
34.
Okay, 34.
I'm turning 35 next week.
Whoa.
We're all in the same age.
Happy birthday.
Thank you, man.
How long have you been dating your lady lady for like a year and a half now
No, but I've known her for a really long time and she's the best. Were you always into her?
Was it? Yeah, I told her like when I first met her ten years ago
I was like, I hope I get to date this girl. Hmm at one one time, right and
And it just didn't work out then but it was like for the for good reason
because we were both shitty people back then and our relationship product like would have fizzled
out i i know what you mean yeah so she's moving in soon and yeah have you lived with a gal before
uh i have and like i think the right when i got my first place this girl moved in with me and then
i was like holy shit this sucks
dude my girl just moved in but it's been uh it's been great well i mean well i think in when you're
23 like i didn't understand what i was getting myself into yeah yeah and then now that i'm like
i mean she's already been basically living at my my house so uh or soon to be our house yeah you know um no no i uh
thanks man i needed that yeah yeah no i because i like when she's like moving i was like nervous
because i was yeah i was like because i feel like it can go either way where it can be like really
great or like really suck yeah and it's been like amazing which has been great but it's like uh that's such
a good feeling when they move in yeah this is like even better than when we did oh dude it's
it's amazing i yeah i'm so happy i mean we were already like through the whole year we've been
with each other pretty much every single day like she came on tour with me the last tour that i did
in europe oh fun um and then i mean honestly i think we've had maybe a month away from each Like she came on tour with me the last tour that I did in Europe. Oh, fine. And then,
I mean, honestly,
I think we've had maybe a month away from each other,
like a cumulative leave of days.
Yeah.
So that's not,
she's like,
yeah,
it's like,
great.
So easy to bring around.
I hope I'm the same for her.
For sure.
I'm sure.
Yeah.
Is she,
is she in the band?
Yeah.
Did she in music as well no she's she
does hair um so she works on the show called good trouble and then um uh what's it called
and she's done a bunch of other shows and then she has clients that she'll she'll do hair for
she do your hair yeah haircut looks good thanks i actually need to get it cut again because it
grew it's like i started taking finasteride i'm'm on it, bro You're on finesse right for years. Really? Mm-hmm. Why I was gonna lose it. Okay
Yeah, I saw it starting to go. I was very preemptive about it. Like yeah moment. I saw this that going backwards
I was like no shot. Yep. That's so funny
My dad was like because I do the blood test with him and he was like yo your DHT is too high
I was like, what does that mean?
Just like give me whatever I have to take. He's like, all right, cool.
I'm giving you these, these they're called Finney's. And I'm like, what,
what are Finney's? Finesterides. I was like, all right, what do they do?
They block your DHT from going to elevated.
And so now I'm at 30 for my DHT.
And I haven't had any side effects from it.
Some people say your dong starts to feel like a rubber attachment.
I'm glad to say I still feel very at one with my dong wait is that true yeah holy shit i'm glad i haven't had that one either and then it it um they say it could make it harder to make a baby but so i
have some friends who are on it who get off of it when they get into that okay when that
but then i just googled it the other day and they're like nah dude like it's it's you're not
right dhd doesn't really affect that.
It's if there is a difference, it's like fractional and you still gotta be careful.
But yeah, I mean, my hair has been growing back so fast now because of it.
Looks great, dude.
Thank you.
I need to take that blood test because a lot of people have been commenting.
They're like, they're like, dude, you're receding.
But this has been my hairline forever since high school.
Then you're, yeah.
But I don't know but I don't know
I don't know if it's everyone's commenting that I got you going to my dad. I'll set you up, dude
Yeah, I want to take that test because gotcha picking up my script today for one month more. Yeah. Yeah
Yeah, dude. I love it. And if my DHT is not we're gonna go hang out in LA just take our finesse rides together drinking espresso
Otherwise known as the fucking dream.
Yeah.
Yeah, that sounds nice.
Once you're 35, that's kind of the peak.
People don't understand.
Unless they're in their 30s, like, taking finesse ride and drinking espresso is heaven.
All right?
You got all your bases covered.
Shit melts in your mouth.
You got energy and you got hair.
I want to get there, dude.
I have four years.
Dude, don't worry.
You'll be there soon.
You're on your way, bro.
If my DHT's at normal levels,
I'm going to screenshot and send it to all you fuckers.
Yeah, you should.
But yeah, being 30, you know, 30s are interesting.
Things do start like hurting more.
Oh, yeah.
I'm getting a lot of ear hair that she's got to pluck out for me.
That was interesting.
I never believed that.
My first lawyer that I had,
he was turning 40
when he was still working with me.
We're still good friends.
But he was like,
man, Dylan,
getting older is pretty fucking whack.
I was like, what do you mean?
He's like,
well, you got to shake more than once.
That's for sure.
Yeah, you're leaking all the time you're just leaking fluid it's true you got to shake more than once now yeah like i'm
shaking a little bit more than than i used to my tubes are just yeah yeah yeah they don't it's not
like a stop motion anymore it's kind of just like a little bit of dribble i like dribbling in my
pants a little bit it feels primal like for real i'm like
yeah nice good just get a little moisture down there going yes and then and then yeah he was
like ear hair he's like watch out it comes like even if you think it's not you gotta watch out
for that yeah you know when people don't take care of that stuff like i might have some nose
hairs right now but i'm pretty good at i'm pretty good now too because dude mine will start going
crazy and i'll be like what the fuck am i doing and then i had friends i had friends who had them in high school and they just wouldn't like oh man i'm like
what are you doing like the people that are already 40 in high school yeah the best dude you know
what's good for that is the weed whacker your nose hair trimmer oh yeah escape yeah i actually
have that's that's for the yeah that's for the. Did you use the lawnmower? Yeah. But yeah, I also use this one when I'm feeling down.
Dude, you're hawking that well.
Thanks, man.
Yeah.
What do you mean hawking?
Sorry.
When I'm hawking into my nose and using the incredible weed whacker.
Yeah.
That's made by Manscaped.
You got it.
That's how you do it.
You guys want to answer some cues?
Yeah.
All right.
Boyfriend won't drill.
Sup, Chad and JT. First, I just want to say I'm so all right boyfriend won't drill sub chat and jt first
i just want to say i'm so happy for the both of you and your netflix show i'm stoked that your
dank and wholesome messages are now reaching a wider audience here's my sitch my boyfriend and
i have had numerous conversations about the fact that we have different libidos we don't have sex
as often as we used to and a big part of that is that my birth control has me all fucked up
he doesn't try to guilt me or make me feel bad but here's the thing he won't jerk off and every time he tries to communicate to me
that he isn't fully satisfied i feel a twinge of bitterness because if he would just jerk off i
feel like this wouldn't be an issue he says that he doesn't jerk off because it would only make
him hornier and make him frustrated and he doesn't want to take it out on me is this a thing i just
need some male perspective we still have sex one to two times per week,
which I feel is a lot considering we were both full-time students and have jobs.
But I just saw a thing on Instagram that said a man needs one orgasm a day to
maintain a healthy prostate.
So now in addition to feeling guilty that he's not nutting,
I'm also worried about his prostate.
Please advise.
No.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Don't worry about his prostate for sure yeah don't eat a
nut every day I mean actually that's like a really good thing to like that's
like it's it's been sports yeah you retain your seed yeah for sports or if
you need to do well and like boxing matches or on school tests or anything
like that little retention it sounds like it sounds like uh they need to get like
sex sex sounds like a chore for them right now yeah i need to make sure it doesn't feel like a
chore and there's a lot of in between yeah there's a lot of in between between no sex and sex there's
a lot of things you can do in the it doesn't all have to be his way or no way yeah i think you
guys could find a healthy middle ground with something that works for both of you because
she clearly cares about the guy a lot yeah and it sounds like he cares about her a lot too i do
understand that thing too where sometimes in the i'm better about it now but in the past i'd be like
frustrated that my girlfriend didn't want to have sex. And then I just wouldn't go beat off.
Like I'd want to stay frustrated or I felt like if I retained it at some point, I would convince her.
Yeah.
I remember I went on a trip to like Joshua Tree with an old girlfriend.
And I was so horny that weekend.
And she was like, hey, babe, I don't think I want to have sex this weekend.
And I just didn't jack off.
And I ended up like, you know, I was testy.
And then my dad was like, why don't you just go beat off? off and i'm like that's genius um you always gotta beat off but sometimes when you
have that like that uh you want to like hold on to like the tension almost you're like i want to
be angry now yeah horny but that you can't do that now it's like being angry and horny is bad
that's you at your worst you're so reactive yeah. Yeah. Me. And then I think, I don't know.
Couldn't they like just kiss while he beats off or something like that?
I mean, she could beat him off too.
Right.
I didn't want, I didn't.
Yeah.
Yeah.
I mean, I don't want her to do something that she's not feeling, but.
I mean, if she's not feeling that and they're in a relationship, I don't know if it's really
going to last.
That's right.
Right.
Like nothing's better than a good old handy.
That's what I'm saying.
You know?
Yeah. Thank you, man. Yeah. Taking out the spit or lube doesn't matter dude using a hand yeah you
add that to the one or two times a week hey and if like you're scared of like what's you know
making a mess just put a towel down yeah yeah and he can bust on his chest come on yeah exactly
i've never been afraid of that every yeah every dude loves his own load yeah you know for sure like a hot thick load and just look at what i did
whoa yeah do you know i could do that yeah impressed are you impressed they're never as
impressed as you are with do you love me more now you're always like look at what i did they're like
a big deal it's amazing it's actually. It's actually amazing. My girlfriend actually said that.
You don't understand.
This is a lot.
This is amazing.
She actually said to me the other day, she's like, nice load.
And I was like, thank you so much.
That's a nice compliment.
Damn, that's a good compliment.
Right?
One of the best.
Not a big load.
But also, for the retaining stuff, she should change her mindset.
She's motivating him.
He's probably out there crushing it.
You know, if he's retaining his seed and he's unreleasing it a couple times, he's probably out there getting shit done you know if he's retaining his seed and he's only releasing it a couple times he's probably out there getting shit done yeah it's not bad
yeah you're not having sex you're you're going out there and you're like you're really doing it
you're staying busy yeah yeah so i think she should be like she should be she should be stoked
sit down and talk to him be like you know what i'm really proud of you for retaining yeah and like
when i feel right let's make this like not a chore and i want to do it i want to
make you feel good and honestly nothing makes a girl hornier than not putting pressure on her to
have sex like if if she's like if you're like coming a little horny and she's like babe i don't
feel like it's now you're like and you can get to a place of acceptance quickly and just like oh babe
no worries cool i'm gonna be go playing some league and just hit me up when you're ready
you'd be surprised like how often they'll be like i know we can actually have sex now it's always something
counterintuitive yeah um all right dank wife's approval brothers of stoke and activism greetings
from your fellow student of stoke good tidings to you before my question i want to let you know
you've added to your conversion rate with the netflix show wife, who is not typically a schmole,
had a hard time getting into the podcast,
but after seeing your bro's incredible journey
of tribulation brodom, she has seen the light.
She's been quoting historic lords around the casa
and I've never been happier.
Thanks.
Oh, that's so sweet.
Anyways, here's the question.
My wife won't let me trim a mohawk
into our one and a half year old's dome.
Is that unchill of her or reasonable?
We'll let you bros decide
if she denies the judgment of the council should i just carve in some serious flow and ask for
forgiveness afterwards any guidance would be greatly appreciated late cash monday
um i think it's you know do you want this kid to be badass or not? Yeah. That's a good question.
For sure.
To ask her.
Yeah.
Put it on her.
Yeah, you want him to be just like a little bitch-ass kid?
Yeah.
Or do you want him to really troll the playground
and just have power?
Yeah, do you want a Khal Drago kid
who's just going to mount his horse
and then conquer the earth?
Yeah.
Some kid makes a sand castle,
he just steps in it.
Yeah.
I would also say, too... But just politely right he's like a polite punk dude the best kind yeah can i step
on this sandcastle it's just for my my whole my thing you can see the hair oh of course thank you
and then he steps on it you can see the hair. It's kind of just my thing. My parents have designated this.
Yeah, I think that's the best route.
And then also, dude, I think a big part of all these things in every part of life is just knowing when to fight and not to fight.
You got to save your fights a little bit.
So maybe you give her this one and then she lets you give him a tattoo when he's three.
And you're like,
Hey,
I let it slide on the Mohawk.
Yeah.
But he is getting barbed wire across his torso.
I agree.
That's,
that's a way better fight to,
to,
yeah.
And then you got credibility.
Cause she's like,
he doesn't always push back.
He let him have,
you know,
the Cristiano Ronaldo haircut I wanted instead,
which is the worst haircut. Did you ever have that haircut?
No.
You never went short on the side, spiky on top?
No.
Have you had long hair before?
I used to have.
My mom wanted me to be a girl.
Oh.
Yeah.
You're Ernest Hemingway's mom.
Yeah.
Well, not like, oh, I hope you're a girl.
She didn't dress you like a girl and stuff like that?
It was like, oh, she was bummed because she wanted my brother and then to have a daughter.
So it's like, you know, just like good and equal balance but but yeah i came out and um and then she just never cut
my hair i had like these like crazy curls i had good long hair but i definitely looked like a girl
nice yeah it was cool that is cool i could i'll try to show you guys pictures like there it was
good flow we'll listen to that song.
Yes.
And then we'll look at the photos at the same time.
And the song is called Modern Girl.
Wow.
Dude, a lot of stuff is just connecting today.
Yeah, good synergy.
Sup, bros.
My name is Titus Cornpop,
and I got a question that's been making my stoke pretty questionable.
So I've been dating this chick for a year now,
and she's great, and I love her.
I know this is going to sound shallow and not PC, but I've started to notice that she've been dating this chick for a year now and she's great and I love her I know this is gonna sound shallow and not PC
But I've started to notice that she's been getting a little poundage and I don't know how to go about telling her that I don't
Want her to get big. I really like this girl, but if my dink isn't attracted to her
I don't know what to do. If you could shed some light on my situation that would help for sure
Let me know. Also. I have watched the Netflix show. I also I have watched the Netflix show yet
But me my we have I guess he hasn't watchedflix show yet but me and my we have i guess
he hasn't watched it yet but me and the boys are planning a watch party nice dude thank you
dude i gotta say man if you've noticed she's put on weight she's definitely noticed
yeah people are pretty uh aware of that stuff so i would tread tread lightly lightly dude
very lightly this is a like the laser grid and
entrapment that you're trying to get through and uh i don't know is there an answer to this
no i don't i don't have a good i don't have a good answer um i'm also like not i i would i'd
be fine you like with it yeah like you know. Yeah, girls put on weight in their bones most of the time.
Everyone fluctuates.
I fluctuated.
Sure.
Yeah, I don't know if there's a great answer.
I think you just have to have faith.
Yeah.
Just have faith, brother.
And then just see if you can, you'll still get hard, dude.
Definitely.
You just think about some weird shit in your brain say something kind of crazy and
before you know it you'll be popping like nothing happened it's not it's not what you demand from
life it's what life demands from you man you just got to find a way that's what's so great about the
brain there's so many ways to get horny yeah definitely think about one of those old classic ones you used to look at yeah man i
remember the good old penthouse ones yeah belladonna dude oh my god my brother and i used
to keep them up above these like light fixtures in our bathroom because we had we share the room
and and the magazines not a cool thing to share magazines though. Cause you know, yeah. This comes back to load.
They get sticky.
Load gets on them.
It's so much.
Yeah.
It's not cool when your brother says that you have a huge load.
No,
it's not.
No,
you ruined the paper dude with your huge load.
You're like,
uh huh.
Yeah.
Say it again.
Yeah.
I fucking did.
Yeah.
Yeah.
I didn't even notice your load. Yeah. Yeah. Say it again. Yeah. I fucking did. Yeah. Yeah. I didn't even notice your load.
Yeah.
Yeah.
You got to say magazines were not the easiest thing to use.
No.
Like the computer is so much more.
It's so much better.
You're seated there.
Yeah.
You put your landing down.
Yep.
The magazine, it was always kind of cumbersome.
Yeah.
It's kind of hard to sit and then also have it laying down
and and doing that because you kind of have to like you're kind of bent over right so like you
like if i was ever doing it when i was younger i would always be like you know kind of in like a
the like a what is it the um that yoga position uh downwardward dog. Downward baby dog.
Yeah, downward dog.
Downward dog.
That's what it is.
Downward dog?
Child's pose.
Child's pose?
That's what it is.
That's what it is.
I've been so locked in, man.
Yeah.
So you'd be in child's pose.
Nice.
That's an easier way,
but then that's how you fuck up the papers.
Or you get a drafting table.
Yeah.
Have you been caught doodling your noodles? On a music conductor stand? Yeah. Have you been caught on a music conduction conductor stand yeah
have you been caught doodling your noodle yeah i did i got caught by my dad how'd that go it was
so funny um the only reason it's funny is like it was embarrassing as fuck but right it was so
funny because i had come back from coachella this was before I was playing any shows there or anything like that.
And I hear the door open.
I thought I had locked it.
I hear the door open.
Like, fucking, you know, I was out.
You know, you do, like, the gym shorts.
So it's like you can, like, kind of be out of the underwear and the side.
And immediately, like, this.
And I'm like, what are you doing in here?
You have to yell yeah and he's
like wow guess there wasn't enough girls at Coachella and he stood there for a second let
it sit in and then just close the door he burned he burned me so bad he made you sit in it yo yeah
sit in the tent your dad sounds like a cool guy dude he's cool way cooler than me that is cool
it fucked me up.
I was like, dude, what a burn.
That was some alternative medicine right there.
Right there.
I got one time I was watching.
I've had problems with masturbation doing it too much,
and I probably got too comfortable with it in my youth.
And I was watching.
I probably told this story before,
but we were watching Monday Night Football.
It was me and my brother and my dad on the couch.
It's like Steelers, Jags.
We're just watching.
And then I got like, we'd just walk around in our boxers in my house.
And I just rub my dick a little bit.
No big deal.
Maybe rub it twice.
Totally lose sight of what I'm doing.
And then I just hear my dad turn and look.
And he goes, what the fuck are you doing?
And I looked down
i did what you did i just yelled at him i was like nothing shut the fuck up bitch
and my dad was like jesus christ and then i turned to my brother who's like oh he's like
my champion and has my back and I look at my brother's like
Yeah, have you ever been oh, yeah, yeah, I went to a boarding school. Oh, wow. Yes. I was in dorm and wait
Why did you have to go to boarding school?
I'm I almost siblings went okay. Yeah, my parents I was spoiled
They try to do it to me for like you know
yeah if you don't shape up yeah no it wasn't because i was a bad kid unfortunately uh but uh
no i like dude we got so comfortable with each other that like people would walk in and you just
keep going you'd be like really yeah yeah it's all dudes wow although it was funny you know i'd catch kids and i'd prop the
door open with the trash cans dude there's one kid harrison like was running up he's like no no no
no his boner just coming up i remember one time i was at someone running at you with a swaying boner
disarm yourself so we uh i remember one time i was at
my house though and we had like a back door and our buddies walked in through our back door and
i was watching backroom casting couch oh my god classic great yeah great one nice anal scene
and uh and they just they just knock on the window.
Then they come in.
And I still like it was so clear that what I was doing.
I'm like, what's up, dudes?
Just like shut the laptop.
It was so awkward.
Hey.
There's no.
Yeah.
I want to know someone that's like played it off so well that they've made the other person feel awkward for coming in on them. We've talked about that.
If you could sit in the pocket and just be cool,
you can flip the power dynamic quick.
Be crazy, right?
Yeah, this dude John at my boarding school,
I came in one time and he was just like, get out.
Yeah, but I like what you're saying.
You're just like, oh, yeah, is this about the lawnmower?
Oh, yeah, yeah, no, I'll get to it're just like, oh, yeah. Is this about the lawnmower? Oh, yeah.
No, I'll get to it after this.
In conversation.
Yeah.
And just throw him a wink.
Yeah, throw him a wink and you just get back to it.
And you're like, are you going to stay or do I need to?
What are we doing here?
And they'd be like, dude, Dylan's the fucking man, dude.
I caught him masturbating and I didn't flinch.
Didn't flinch.
Immediately already knew what I was going to come in and talk about, too, somehow.
He's so present.
Yeah. immediately already knew what i was going to come in and talk about too somehow he's so present yeah
the guy he's just operating at a very high level all right you ready for the next part did you are
you prepared okay cool i didn't prepare oh it's on the spot i sort of prepared well we'll let you
go last then so you can uh okay chad who's your beef of the week my beef of the week is um economic experts they just love to
be right dude they're just like this next couple years are gonna be rough you know it's gonna be
there's gonna be a huge downturn this is like the great recession you're like shut the fuck up you
know they're just debbie downers does anyone even know what the economy is i don't i don't even exist not really i think
these just they're just professional bummers they just come in they're like oh it's gonna be
depression you're like you're just a nerd shut up already got depression man and and did they they
and did they they always like to be like i'm the guy who called the great recession of 2008
and you're just like all right if you called it, why did it happen? Yeah? Yeah? Yeah? Yeah? Does anyone like the I called it guy?
No, I told you so yeah, dude. Well the mistake was made
Yeah, so I just find a different job quit or at least be more vocal. Yeah, that it doesn't happen
Yeah, yeah, right be more sort of like you know what I think it's gonna be okay
Yo, I called it's going to be okay. Look at the dollars.
Yo, I called.
It was going to be a good time.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
He's like, guys, the dollar, I think it's going to be good.
Gas prices are going down, dude.
I like that guy.
I want that guy.
Yeah.
That's my economic. Yeah.
Yeah.
I like that.
Sorry, no go, baby.
No, nothing.
yeah i like that sorry no go baby no nothing my beef of the week is uh just getting uh ambushed by a perverted uber driver not physically but just with his stories of his perversion
we're just driving it's all good he's like oh you live by the grove i'm like yeah he's like i used
to bring a lot of dates there i'm like me too and then uh from there he just went into sordid tales
of some real um unchill mischief and then i'm like dude i don't even know you dog maybe it was on me
but i don't know he was just a weird weird guy and then afterwards you're like do i review him
one star but he knows where i live like i was just like
i think you shouldn't tell anyone anything perverted for three hangs yeah it's got to be
on the fourth hang that's a good call thank you yeah i was taken aback a little bit and he didn't
especially for an uber driver too just to be that comfortable with you and he didn't seem like the
type he was like i guess no one does but he was like really nerdy and sweet and then it just like incel rage and
he didn't know his perversions were perverted he thought they were like charming and light-hearted
yeah and i was like this is a different vibe dude yeah who's your beef of the week my beef of the
week is eli roth oh yeah former guest of the pod really yeah beef of the week is Eli Roth. Oh. Yeah. Former guest of the pod.
Really?
Yeah, but let her rip.
I would love to fight him.
Dude.
No, just kidding.
I wouldn't.
I wouldn't.
No, but I really hate his movie Green Inferno.
Oh, dude.
I watched that, too.
Right when you sent me that, I was like, okay, I can finally bring up this beef I've had
with him.
Go.
He also, he just seems really serious.
Is he a really serious guy?
Or is he fun? I don't know. He's kind of both. Yeah, it's a little pompous. Let's see. He seems like he would be Hollywood. He loves Hollywood
Okay, that's not my vibe
I asked him once cuz I got this sense from when we were playing in a softball game with him and I said I
Don't know why I guess if I but I say you ever think about being a model and he said yeah, of course
He said, you ever think about being a model?
And he said, yeah, of course.
Oh, my God.
Yo, that's crazy when you're that, like, when you're that, I don't know what the word is.
Just like you're already so sure about it.
Like if someone said it to me, I'd be like, no, what?
I could?
I could just tell by the way he was standing.
And he looks great.
Like he's handsome.
But, yeah. He's definitely a handsome dude.
He's definitely a handsome dude.
But, yeah.
But what's the beef with Inferno? My beef is Green Inferno was just absolute.
I didn't need to see all those people die in those ways with those cannibals.
It was dark.
It's fucked up.
It's just not even a fun thing to watch.
I mean, he's the originator of torture porn.
Yeah.
Which makes me angry because I don't like torture porn either
which is like like the saw stuff like the saw one i feel like was like a really good idea and then
all of a sudden it was like all right guys how many cool ways can we make people die which i
don't that's i don't know final destination no i do like father's nation too but hostile
hostile to fuck me up and then yeah i watched that for a... Is Hostel 2
where they cut off his dick with the clippers?
Or is that Hostel 1?
I can't remember, but I just remember the hot girl
and he has a saw,
and he accidentally cuts her face with it.
Oh, dude, see? Fuck, why?
Yeah, and I was like, and she's so cute, too.
I was like, oh.
It's brutal. And dude, Green Inferno.
Dude. Like like pops the eyeball
yo that one uh man it like the tongue off dude it makes it's making my body parts go inside sorry
no no it's cool dude but yeah that's that's my beef i watched it i was like yeah it's so
what the fuck is this yeah yes but i watched the whole thing by accident. Yeah. It was a complete accident. Yeah.
Because I had an opportunity to stop it and I didn't.
I know, man.
But yeah, that's my beef.
It's good beef.
Thanks.
Chad, who's your babe of the week?
My babe of the week is Adam Sandler.
Great babe.
He went up at the, we were at the improv last night.
He went up at the lab.
Wow.
And like we watch stand-up all the time.
We never, you know, it's like when you watch comedy a lot,
it's a lot to like make you laugh.
Yeah.
Like stand-up because you just see it.
But I was like dying laughing.
Like I've never, I haven't laughed that hard at stand-up in years.
Oh, that's amazing. And you just watch him up there and he's just such a master.
He's just so, I love him too.
He has such like a good sort of like self-aware thing going on where he's just like i don't know like his whole thing
of just like you can tell he just loves comedy yeah and he's just very sort of like humble and
he just loves telling jokes and he's just making people in the audience like this one guy this one
old guy was laughing so hard that it was just like he couldn't control it.
And it's just such like a, it's like the best thing I've ever seen.
And he like pointed out, he's like, that's nice, sir.
And the guy's just like laughing so hard.
And he's just like, his stamp is so like whimsical.
He just tells these stories that he just like made up, you know,
but they're just like, there's probably kernels of truth,
but he just goes into this really like whimsical territory where it's just like made up, you know, but they're just like, there's probably kernels of truth, but he just goes into this really like whimsical territory where I was just
like,
um,
I don't know.
It's just so fun and goofy.
And there's no one else who has his style.
His stage presence is like very unassuming.
Yeah.
Very humble.
Yeah.
And then,
yeah,
those,
those fake stories that he makes up.
Yeah.
They always feel like kind of right and true in a way,
but they're all just made up.
It's like pure creativity. Yeah. He is still one of my favorites. Like, yeah. up yeah they always feel like kind of right and true in a way but they're all just made up it's
like pure creativity yeah he is still one of my favorites like yeah i i mean i i still feel like
grown-ups and grown-ups too is like so funny because it feels like uh i don't know how many
people like that in the world but like it feels like you're watching a group of guys that have
all been friends forever like whoever wrote it it really it comes through as and i don't know if they're all ad-libbing on the day but it looks
as if those dudes have just been saying jokes to each other forever yeah we might i don't i've been
asking myself this too like would you rather be ben stiller adam sandler adam sandler oh fuck but
ben stiller is so good too like i think ben stiller's like a little more artsy especially now but he
seems like he's very hard on himself and maybe he doesn't enjoy it as much as adam sandler
who just seems like he's known who he is the whole time he's written and he's got his crew
of friends and they're in every movie and like it's it's like dude little nicky still i rewatched
i rewatched that and it is one of the best movies still the boobs on the head yeah dude and Ronnie Dangerfield like get over here
people just love it it's so good yeah daddy I fucking love big big daddy so
good yeah I don't even happy Gilmore yeah yeah i mean bill madison happy mr mr lady fucking gets it's
so good sorry no i'm ruining your your love i was gonna be a stick in the mud because i don't
really like any of his movies but i like adam sandler i think that's what's powerful about him
is like i'm just glad he's stuck to who i really appreciate that that you're not that you don't
that you're saying that. Oh, really?
It sticks back to our, what's it called?
Our art talk earlier.
I love Happy Gilmore and Billy Madison.
But yeah, Big Daddy and Little Nicky, I was always like, or Mr. Deeds.
But I'll do Q&As on Instagram and everyone asks me questions about Adam Sandler.
I don't know if there's anyone more beloved than he is.
Yeah.
He might be the most beloved man in America I think I think also everyone just loves how like he seems like he's
just such a normal dude and then the fact that he just wears you know like t-shirt yeah t-shirt
and basketball shorts yeah which is the most comfortable attire ever possible yeah last night
he's wearing like a Hawaiian with like the collar was like
kind of half popped half not and um i mean he's just he's just a good dude he's been married to
that the same woman his wife was i think i saw his wife at the bar and she was just laughing
watching and she looked equally joyful i mean they seem like they have an incredible relationship
because like in an alternate reality it could have been horrible where like adam sandler's doing all these
movies because she's always kind of not the main character and you know she's always like a side
side character peripheral some girl that's that's just like sort of acting in there and and then is
gone for the rest of the movie yeah Yeah. And it could have been like,
babe,
why am I not like the love interest in every one of your movies?
And it hasn't been that.
So I think that they have like,
trust and understanding.
Yeah.
Trust and understanding and like an incredible relationship. And it looks like he just still is having fun in comedy beast.
I think that's the goal,
right?
Yeah.
You just want to be having fun.
You want to be inspired and having fun as long as possible yeah dude uh my baby of the week is uh running into friends in other cities
I I think there's something about I was in New York and I went to the stand and I just ran into
some comics that I'm that I know but we're not like super chummy but all of us running into each
other in New York it was like just a fast track to us,
like bonding. Like we were all just like, dude, dude, dude, dude. And I had that when I was in
Austin for moon tower comedy festival. Like it's just, I don't know. There's something about,
it's almost like when you go to camp, the friendships just get accelerated or we used
to do this religious retreat in high school and everybody would just bond once you get out of your home base
everybody kind of lets their guard down and I don't know it's just a
It's the best way to hang out with people you're sort of friends with absolutely. Yeah, that's that's that's great
You must have that a lot right? Yeah, I mean it happens every now and then but it'll be really cool when like
You you'll land somewhere and someone will be like wait. I heard you're in town for this wait you're in town for this too oh my god let's go let's go well actually this happened recently
and my mind was blown um so do you know who mark rebia is yeah hilarious yeah i uh i did his like
twitch show a while ago and then i hadn't seen him since but we've been talking about trying to
make music and he's been touring like crazy. So
I landed in
Vegas and he text me he's like hey, I heard you're in town I saw like your face because because I have a residency over there and and I was like, oh my god
Where are you? He's like I'm downstairs in the wind at encore. I was I'm coming down right now
I come downstairs and I'm like, what are you doing here? And he's like, oh I'm playing life is beautiful tomorrow
But I came in early from London to get some sleep blah blah blah and I'm like, what are you doing here? And he's like, Oh, I'm playing life is beautiful tomorrow. But I came in early from London to get some sleep, blah, blah, blah.
And I'm like, well, this is amazing. Let me, let me show you around the lobby.
I showed them around the lobby and, and as we're going around and I'm like,
well, I got to go, I forgot what I was doing. Um, but I was like,
I got to go do blah, blah, blah. And, uh, and he's like, okay, cool.
And as we're walking back, he's walking me back to my room. I see my friend Christian who goes by Jameson. He's like an R and B singer, but I
hadn't seen him for, I swear, I think 15 years. And him and I used to make music every day.
Like it was before my project ever broke. I toured with him. He had this big song and we got,
we got put on like, um, direct support for backstreet boys so we did a whole
tour with the backstreet boys wow yeah and and i would open up five minutes before christian and
then christian would come on and do like 15 minutes and then the backstreet boys are gone
that's awesome it was so fun yeah and and i was like when i saw him i was like so mind blown and
we're actually getting in the studio this saturday but it was like that you know we're like just that instant bond happened again it was like wait you're here
i'm here i haven't seen you in 15 years so that's like completely the babe is that's a great babe
nice who's your babe of the week you guys are my babes of the week yeah i have to that's nice i
mean when i when i saw the show i don't know why i feel like i had been following
one of you guys maybe it was you but um but i'd seen your i'd seen a bunch of the um i feel like
i follow the podcast on tick tock because my favorite one that i've seen from the podcast
was when you guys were talking about investment and you were talking about investing in bear flag
which is one of the best places ever except for sweetfin i would do that too um yeah sweetfin's great too it's really good we should
get some after this um but i but yeah so anyways it was really cool once you guys reached out
because i was like holy shit you know i didn't expect that to happen and it's just such an honor
to be on i think you guys are so fucking oh dude that's just the coolest guy i gotta say man you're
really easy to talk to you're like a very present and approachable guy i almost
said that like an accusation you're like listen dude you're too present and appropriate and it's
pissing me off it's nice dude yeah it's upsetting me but i like it it's cool now the feeling's
mutual i mean i saw when you uh when you I was like, oh, fuck.
I've been listening to your stuff and knowing about you for
five years.
Something like that.
But then I was with Mark Hayes
and you texted him. I was with him.
And so I was like,
maybe you do the pod.
Oh, yeah, absolutely.
Anytime you guys want me on, I'll come on. we're gonna have you back yeah yeah anytime you need a guest
i'm here we do drafts we draft our favorite things i think you'd be good at drafting yeah
yeah what drafting what do you mean like we'll draft like our favorite like appetizers oh yeah
that sounds good our favorite like uh action movies oh yeah but i feel like you got a good library in your dome i do i could do
good on that yeah i could do well there it is there it is right my dad would be stoked you guys
know zedathan too oh yeah yeah great guy yeah i don't know why he dropped the athin though i didn't
even know he had yeah that's his real name really yeah in the 1980s like germany
wanted to make more babies so they tried to like put out names that were like more interesting for
the world and for germany and so like they put out like names like zedathan because he's like
such a popular interesting wait what was the plan yeah so they could make more babies
how does that work i'm just fucking with you. Oh.
Dude, he's a really sweet guy, too.
He's so sweet.
Yeah, yeah.
I just like adding an F in on him.
I don't get shit, dude.
That would have to be in the state category. I'd be like, whoosh.
I wanted to see if I could get you to be like,
wow, yeah, no, I remember that.
I wanted to see if I could get you to be like,
wow, yeah, no, I remember that.
But no, he's the sweetest guy I've ever... Incredibly kind guy.
I'm happy that you guys sunned your perineums over there.
That was fun.
It was an honor.
Yeah, sure.
Where does Zed come from?
What's that name, actually?
Zed is, like, what they call a Z.
Oh, really? Yeah. In Germany? Yeah. actually I said is like what they call a Z oh really yeah oh in Germany yeah I
mean I feel like it over mostly in Europe they like say Zed even in like
the UK yeah yeah Z is not Z over in Europe so I think yeah I think I think
he just put Zed and was like alright put Z, put Z-E-E-D. Z-E-D-D, not Zed.
But are all their other letters still just the one letter?
Yeah.
I don't think the letter Zed is spelled Zed.
But when they say Z instead of Zed, they say Zed.
Yeah.
But for like A, they still say just A.
They don't say Ad.
Yeah. Ad. Right. Ad. Say Aaron. for like a they still say they still say they don't say ad yeah right aid say aaron about h
they'll say h h yep oh yeah i'm so mad yeah that would be yours h h dude did you ever like before
because you obviously go with your name yeah did you ever consider like a oh yeah i had a horrible
names dude yeah do you have any yeah oh man okay one of them was kid kiddo like and my idea was
like oh dude kid oh didn't last another one there's this guy named scream so i was like what if i'm screech you guys think dj screech yeah i think people because there's another guy named dj ac slater
oh yeah well not dj but ac slater yeah yeah so i was like all right but then i was like this is not
a good idea yeah and then um what were the other ones uh i think i tried to do just java
at one time bad name it's like script like javascript is that where that came from yeah
sweet fuck yeah man i didn't stick and then and then i heard of calvin harris's name and i was
like all right well if calvin harris is going by his real name i think dylan francis is like in
the pocket it's a good name calvin harris isn by his real name, I think Dylan Francis is like in the pocket.
It's a good name.
Calvin Harris isn't his real name.
Yeah.
What's his real name? No.
It fucked me up, too.
I know.
Adam Wiles.
Oh.
Yeah.
And I'm not joking about that.
Yeah.
When people find out you have like a different name.
Yeah.
They trip out a little bit.
Yeah.
They freak out.
I mean, I freaked out because I.
Wait, what?
Nothing. What's your real name? i had this app tom yeah your real name's tom allen i'll leave i don't believe
it no no it's true it is no way are you finding this out right now yeah how was i supposed to
know we're leaving this in yo what tom allen yeah you sound like you killed somebody
dude tom allen well okay so we did the videos and i was like the character was like a
it was way different from me so i was like like i'm gonna be a chat i'm gonna be a fucking douche
yeah you know it says i'm gonna be a chat but wait on before you explain this that makes so much sense now
because kroger is from kroger's right oh no okay oh singer nickelback oh yeah i'll sing of kroger's
the the market do i wish uh i uh smart so i um yeah but then once we started going the character
evolved more into me yeah basically a childlike version of me.
Just naive.
And then we sort of like popped off a little bit,
like went viral with the Seoul City Council.
Yeah.
And then I had like two separate Instagrams.
One was like Tom and then one was Chad.
And then people would find the Tom one.
They'd be like, oh, it's a character.
Like they'd get really disappointed.
And so we were talking to like our agents. they're like what she what should i do and they're like you
just be chad well he was kind of boxed into it like every we thought everyone would know as a
joke because it's the same name as the nickelback singer yeah and then when the first video went
viral like news articles were being like and then chad kroger went into city council and we're
like okay this isn't even just like like these are journalists who are like taking it seriously
yeah and so we're like i guess you gotta stick with it but the it's everything he does is himself
it's just with that different name yeah but people once they find out about the name thing
will be like well then everything's a lie.
So we'll have like his mom on the podcast and they're like, that's not really his mom.
And I'm like, well, dude, it's not that sophisticated of a ruse.
Like it was just an accident that happened.
But I call him Chad.
Yeah.
He's chatting my phone.
Yeah.
But you might pivot back the other way now no i mean
well i think that especially with the show and stuff we wanted to maintain this sort of
the world we created yeah and have it sort of all sort of streamlined but like when i do other
acting gigs i credit as tom tom so i think i think listen I don't really know what to do. Look, man, I can, I understand because the amount of times people like,
like Calvin Harris used to not want to hang out with me.
Like we, before, because I tried to make music with him before and he was like, no.
And then I finally met him in, where was it?
Miami Music Conference. And when I met him, he was like, miami music conference and when i met him he was like oh hey we talked
yeah and then i left and he texted me he's like whoa you're pretty normal yeah you know and i i
guess like i was just very crazy like i heightened myself right online yeah of like kind of like i've
always been obsessed you know with, with like the Charlie Day
style character. That's like the stupid guy that's like, you know, so people always just
assume that that was just who I was and that I wasn't doing it because, you know, that's what
social media, like social media to me was like, I had this class at Loxa called new genres. You
could do whatever you wanted. And we, me and my friend used to make these videos you know going back to laguna beach but we used to make fun of
laguna beach where it was like us pretending to be every single character yeah and then when
instagram came around you're like oh cool like this is kind of like a way where you can do comedy
stuff yeah again and like just put it out there and i was never a comedian at all and um but you
know that's it's it's funny because that's kind of the same thing that happens to me like people and I was never a comedian at all. And, um, but you know,
that's,
it's, it's funny.
Cause that's kind of the same thing that happens to me.
Like people would be like,
Whoa,
you're like really calm.
Right.
Like,
well,
yeah.
What do you like,
do you think I'm just going to fucking like throw things and let's go and
fucking burn this.
Well,
and what's crazy is even someone like Calvin Harris who understands that
there's a level of performance to being a public facing person still thought it was yeah
thought i was just insane yeah we just take it so i wish i had the old text because he was like
dude we used to think that you were like insane right like yeah like a liability yeah interesting
and then you're very relaxed yeah easygoing dude yeah interesting yeah i i uh with dating that was
like a thing where
you know people girls would on dates they'd be like i had a totally different idea of who you're
gonna be i thought you were gonna be stupid yeah yeah no exactly yeah they're like i thought like
chad and i'm like my name's tom um but uh yeah i don't really know what to do because it's sort of
like i guess the the whole nickelback thing like that's why it really know what to do because it's sort of like, I guess the whole Nickelback thing.
Like, that's why I know.
Now knowing that, it's really funny.
Yeah, I had no intention of, like, it becoming.
I was like, oh, Nickelback guy.
That's hilarious.
Yeah.
But I don't really know, you know, because, like, if it'll, like, they'll be sort of, like, I'll become known as Tom.
I don't know.
I'm just going to let it happen.
Just let it ride right
now yeah yeah yeah it's funny too we did like late night appearances last week and like a lot
of the comments are i thought the guy from nickelback was gonna be there where's the guy
and like people in the crowd were there expecting the nickelback so there is something still
hilarious that's an incredible incredible troll yeah yeah yeah and it's like at kimmel like a lot
of people like their tmz was interviewing people there and they're like yeah i'm here for jack
kroger like nickelback i love him they're like wait and the comms like wait so this isn't a
nickelback episode but you were even you were even a little like jarred when he found out his real name yes well
it's always jarring because it's not like well calvin harris though like fuck me yeah yeah yeah
right it fucks you up because you don't expect like calvin harris when you see calvin harris
like that's calvin harris yeah i don't see i don't see him as an adam wiles right that's his real
name yeah wow right it's like so it's so i think because it's so drastically
different that's what it is too because like with but so many like tom allen is drastically
different from chad kroger it is yeah chad and i probably people see me way more as a chad than a
tom you i could see you as a tom potentially it's the allen the Allen. Yeah, I'm Allen Tom Allen sounds like do like
Alright, I'm gonna go and talk to my lawyer Tom Allen, dude
Yeah, when I when I first started stand up I was sort of like I was so like I was trying to figure out I was
Like do I go at Tommy?
Like I'm like disarm some people. Yeah, I like to like Tim Allen more relax
Maybe that's where I'm getting messed up too.
Yeah, yeah.
Tim Allen.
Tim Allen.
I do love Tim Allen.
Not his real name.
Not his real name.
Dude, that motherfucker.
It's not?
What's his real name?
Tim Dick.
Hilarious.
Tim Richard.
Tim Richard.
His last name is Dick.
His last name is Dick.
Wow.
Maybe I'll just keep changing my name.
Maybe like five years from now I'll be like fucking Zach.
Yeah.
That's a good name for you.
That works.
Yeah.
Fucking Zach.
Fucking Zach.
Fucking Zach. That's a good DJ name.. That works. Yeah. Fucking Zach. Fucking Zach.
That's a good DJ name.
Your last name is Zach.
First name is fucking.
Fucking.
Mr. Zach.
Call me fucking.
You can do your middle name as fucking and have Chad as the first name.
Chad fucking Zach. Then you can do the opposite where you were like, oh, no, I go by my middle name fucking.
Yeah.
I go by fucking.
Chad fucking Zach, dude.
Yeah.
People are like at the DMV. Chad fucking Zach, dude. People are like,
at the DMV,
they're like,
fucking right?
And I'm like,
it's Chad,
that's my middle name.
Yeah, but I go by
my middle name right now.
But yeah,
you can call me Chad
or fucking,
whatever you want.
Dude, I forget where we even were
in the process of the pod,
but...
I think Legend?
We just did,
yes, now we're doing Legend.
Legend.
And we can end it
after that
Chad who's your
legend of the week
legend is JetBlue
first class
you know
daddy's getting
a little bougie
sorry
daddy's getting bougie
so we did
Seth Meyers
and they flew us out
oh nice
and we did
first class
JetBlue
which I was like
JetBlue first class
is nice
dude
what's it called
how much of a difference it made in my happiness oh which I was like... JetBlue First Class is nice. Dude. What's it called? It's sad how much the difference it made
in my happiness. Oh, yeah. I was
stoked. The food is
great. Unbelievable. The food is mint.
Oh, yeah. That's what it's called. JetBlue Mint.
And then, you know, it flattens out
to a bed. You know,
free movies, you know,
and we had Miles Teller two rows
behind us. Oh, nice. So he threw Top Gun on.
I threw Top Gun on.
What did you do to look back on him?
Dude, that's the thing.
I was trying to get him because he's very quiet.
He's in the corner.
We're like, Miles, do something.
Take out the drumsticks already, dude.
Yeah, like, can you fucking talk to us?
So every time we'd go to the bathroom, I don't think he looked.
But I was trying to get him to come back.
And I'd be like, give him a huge thumbs up.
And we were on an airplane.
The movie's about airplanes.
I mean, it all felt super synced up.
Yeah, it felt like our moment.
Do you think that's his worst nightmare now?
Where he's like, God damn it, dude, I've just been getting so many fucking...
Just getting hit with these.
Aye aye, rooster.
All day.
Dude, that was...
That's kind of cool to the plane
rooster yeah rooster you're gonna puss out on this one or you're gonna you're gonna not think and do
um but uh it was just an incredible way to fly i yeah i uh i could fly forever like that i could
just fly yeah just be in that first class thing.
Mint.
Beautiful.
It's great.
I've done it a couple times.
I bet for some gigs they fly you out nice.
That's got to be awesome.
My favorite one has to be...
What's the one in Dubai?
Emirates.
Air Emirates?
Emirates.
Wow.
Yeah.
Even just the normal business class there,
the first class, I've seen videos of it.
Yeah.
It's insane.
Really?
The business class in it is still insane as well.
You've got a little thing where you can press down
and drinks pop up on the side.
Really?
A minibar built into the chair?
Yeah.
Wow. and drinks pop up on the side. Really? A minibar built into the chair? Yeah.
What are you talking about?
It's full on just the bougiest way to fly ever. If you think mint's bougie, nah.
Yeah, dude.
That's normal.
That's like peasant.
Yeah.
Yeah, that's peasant bougie.
Emirates is like, I've only flown it one time
and it was insane.
That's awesome.
Yeah.
Now that's sort of why my life goals
is to experience the
you should you should go do some comedy in dubai one time yeah i would like to show out there i did
yeah how was that it was interesting um it was where was it near um it was near that hotel
atlantis oh cool sure i forgot what the place was called but it was so there's certain times where
you can just ask your um i mean well i do this i asked my booking agent to like send me places that i really want to go
yeah so like the first one was norway yeah and i went to oslo and i i played a show there it
actually turned out to be really good but dubai was another one where i was like i really really
really just want to go to dubai i don't care if I play for five people. Yeah, she's like that might happen
Yeah, and I was like, let's do it. And I think I played for maybe 13 14 15. Yeah
It was it was you know, and it was there was a holiday that had just happened as well
Yeah, and I think it was where they couldn't drink
So that also affected the night, but I didn't care
15 I think it was the people that didn't care about the night.
Oh, the rule breakers.
Yeah, the rule breakers.
Oh, nice.
Yeah.
Matthew McConaughey, I see a lot of rule breakers in the audience tonight.
I didn't know you're allowed to break the rules over there.
I'm surprised.
They seem like they're a high conformity society.
Yeah.
Nice.
But it was great.
I mean, it was such a cool place.
We went,
we went,
um,
sand dune snowboarding and riding on the ATVs.
Yeah.
Hell yeah.
Really cool.
That's so cool.
Yeah.
That's what we've been starting to travel just around the country,
but it's so much fun.
Like we were talking about it.
It's the best.
I'm stoked.
It's so fun.
My,
uh,
my legend of the week is ice cream. I don't know if there's anything better. It's the best. I love it. It's so fun. My legend of the week is ice cream.
I don't know if there's anything better.
It's true.
Just get a scoop of ice cream.
You're always going to be satisfied afterwards.
And it comes in so many different versions.
When you get it with something that's like a little crunchy.
Oh.
Like a cookie?
A cookie.
The Pazookie legend over here dude
i do that was already on the ice cream as my legend when you brought that up and i totally
get it man i would feel no shame over it i mean you're just living the dream it's and you look
fit you're good thanks i got back in i haven't eaten any pizookies recently i also think too
when you eat that ice cream your brain goes all right i gotta work this off at some point i'll just do 20 minutes on the peloton and i'll balance it out i
wasn't though you're just doing the pizooks just the pizooks yeah that's nice bonding the reason
also that i i i so i was working out a bunch a year and a half ago before my girlfriend and I started dating, when we started dating,
like,
you know,
protein farts are real.
And,
uh,
I was very scared that I was just going to scare her away with just like
really,
really,
really terrifying,
man,
bad to lose someone over flatulence.
Exactly.
It's the worst way to lose someone.
So that's,
that was a reason why I like,
I didn't work out.
And then,
and then I kind of just had this downward slope of
just eating pizookies and and really just
You're eating pizookies and then also getting like Cocoa Pebbles. I turned into a child for a year. That's nice
It's like new love so it makes sense why I was was pre pre diabetic
Is there anything better than cereal nothing I mean started actually ice cream
Pre pre pre pre pre is there anything better than cereal nothing? I mean sorry actually ice cream
One in I think ice cream one and then cereal to their boat. Yeah, sorry someone asked us if someone had a very
Scram like is there anything better than
Close I think someone asked us if cereal was a soup and that was oh wow provocative. Right, yeah. Oh, that was in Hawaii.
But doesn't soup have to be hot?
Gazpacho?
That's horrible.
It tastes terrible, right? Get it out of here.
Have you ever had a good cold soup?
No.
They all suck.
I've never been interested in gazpacho.
No, I mean, I like a hot soup that needs to cool down a little bit.
Yes.
But a soup that comes out cold?
No.
And it's always at a nice place, and you're like...
It almost feels like it's an ice cream, actually. a bizarre tasting one with veggies in it yeah no shot yeah
out of here bro um who's your legend of the week wait wait before i say my legend to go back to
cereal i used to go to my friend dean's house because my parents of course were like super
duper healthy so at my at my friend's dean's house his parents would get like count chocula
lucky charms at all the cereals under the sun they would have like five boxes i kid you not i would
go through two of them and yeah the mom would yell at me because she'd be like what are you doing
these are for the young children in the house i'm living yeah i'm living i was living this is my
you just got out of jail oh
man stay out yeah I had my arm right where my bowl was protecting it took it
took it took it yeah it's once he pop you can't stop yeah I mean the mini
wheats frosted mini weeks they always had those the big wheats frost amazing
yeah the red box fog and you're like college age and you just put it in like a like a serving
salad bowl yeah you do the
bowl that has the handle on it yeah
walk around it like a king yeah
walk around and there's my big fucking bowl
basically like Genghis Khan
I'm a king
that's how
I don't really drink that much either yeah
so that's how I treat myself
that's what I was doing. After a big thing.
Yeah.
We actually, after Seth, we got banana splits.
Oh, that's amazing.
It's fun.
Just at a diner in New York.
Dude, yeah.
Oh, that sounds great.
We got a big bowl of cinnamon toast crunch after we shot our show.
Amazing.
It's like, you got to cap it off with dessert.
That's what Bruce Springsteen said.
Every time something good would happen, you'd go get some ice cream.
Yeah.
Really?
The boss.
That was his game plan.
Great dude.
Because I don't think he does drugs or drinks.
So that was his like.
That's his vice.
That was his vice.
Yeah.
It's the last one.
Sugar's the last one.
Yeah, it is.
You don't hear about a lot of people blowing their life up over sugar.
It's like, I lost my wife.
It's like, why?
I couldn't stop eating Butterfingers.
She's gone. What about diabetes? Well, you might die, but you're not pissing the people off in your life as much. Yes, that's true
Yeah, yeah, you're right. You're not like a bad dad. Yeah, he ate a butterfinger and he fucking hit me
Yeah, my dad was a piece of shit
Yeah, like why it's like he ate a lot of food from 7-eleven and then just run down the street
Screaming just find him at Baskin Robbins
just naked. I'm so sorry.
You're supposed to be in my Little League game today.
She's like eating a king size
kick ass dog.
Get out of my fucking room.
You and your blizzards Dutch.
Alright, take us home.
Alright, my legend.
My legend is scary movies.
I recently saw Smile.
Okay, so I saw two.
I'm going to shit on another Justin Long movie.
I'm sorry, Justin.
Barbarian?
I know.
You're taking him to task.
Dude, hit me up, though.
I really love you.
He's a very nice guy.
I mean, I met him when I was younger, and he was so nice.
Paul Walker nice.
But you're not disparaging him as a person.
You're saying his work is bad.
Great actor. No, no, no. His work was not bad in it. It you're not disparaging him as a person. You're saying his work is bad. Great actor.
No, no, no.
His work was not bad in it.
It has nothing to do with him.
His work as an actor, incredible.
Right, but I'm misunderstanding because I feel like what you're saying is that it's like the stuff he's in is all bad across the board.
Yeah.
Well, okay.
This is a big personal opinion on Barbarian.
The other one, I think anyone that's going to watch House of Darkness, it uh barbarian i've heard mixed reviews some people thought it was really really
scary there for me it was like this part that happens in it i feel like should have happened
later and and i don't want to ruin the movie for anyone because that one actually i do think is is
good enough for it there's merit yeah there's merit and it was it was a fun watch but smile i saw it was it last night or no two nights ago or no it was last night holy shit
finally like a really really good scary movie incredible pop-up scenes and not a shitty ending
that was like oh man you know well i found out they like like hypothetically i found out the
ghost like surfboards and we sent them off and we're free.
Yeah. Not that type. It was so good.
Oh, I got it. And I was just so stoked because I love scary movies.
Like I'll go on to Apple and like every night my girlfriend I will look and try to find a new one for us to watch.
And then we've done that whole thing where you go on TikTok and look up like 10 scariest movies.
Yeah. None of them have really been that good so this this made me like yes scary movies are back right let's go it
was great and like the intro scene with where they do like the title card it reminded me of like
psycho like they made a whole like weird sound for flashing the the smile. And it was, I watched psycho for the first time,
like a month ago.
Great.
Phenomenal movie.
Great.
And it just get in two scenes.
You're off to the races.
And then it pivots from one kind of movie into another kind of movie.
It's like a really,
uh,
I don't know.
Just like,
uh,
best advanced storytelling.
Yeah.
That Hitchcock guy.
Yeah.
He's,
he's,
he's,
you know,
he's done some good stuff.
He lived up to the billing. I was like, you're fucking good at this. Yeah, that Hitchcock guy. Yeah, he's done some good stuff. He lived up to the billing.
I was like, you're fucking good at this shit, man.
And then the guy who plays Norman Bates.
How cool is it?
Think about being Hitchcock and starting a way of filming like that.
It's crazy.
And then they still make movies based off his ideas.
I watched that Kimmy movie, the new Soderbergh one with Zoe Kravitz.
And it's Hitchcockian.
It's like she overhears a murder then you know people are trying to get
her now and you're like dude this was 80 years ago when he originated this stuff and it still works
smile is kind of like uh have you seen it follows yeah no dude gotta watch it yeah a24 you can't go
wrong with a24 nail it every time so good you'll really like it yeah smile and it follows
smile and it follows it follows you can watch on netflix i think okay which you can also watch your
show on netflix as well i'm pretty sure please do no i love scary movies no press but that'd be sick
um but yeah that it follows is is probably one of my favorite ones as well.
Hereditary, It Follows, and then now Smile is in there of the top scary movies that I've seen.
Did you watch The Black Phone?
No.
Is it good?
I liked it.
He plays a good... It's...
Yeah.
Is the ending bad?
When I watched it, I thought it was going to be really weird, like ghosts coming out of nowhere ghost kids it's more like a really sadistic serial killer oh okay um and uh
yeah i like it all right i'm gonna watch that tonight i wasn't like i wasn't like that's
amazing but i was like i was satisfied good okay i thought it was a good ending i i you know i feel
a little bit i'm sort of like unsure of it so i don't want to say like it's great and you watch it and you're like oh fuck
no no I'm not even thinking that you're saying that but
you're the
the preconceived notions
that I had about it you've kind of taken
them away which is good
yeah no it's good
because from the commercials I thought it was
a different style film
it's like a sadistic killer but there's some like
sort of like um what's the word where it's like a sadistic killer but there's some like sort of like um
what's the word where it's it gets into the sort of like surreal territory a little bit okay um
i like it i can't wait to watch this and get mad dude let me know you think you're like dude i'm
never gonna trust you again yeah horrible horrible risk dude recommending something to someone yeah
it's a portal into your preferences.
Yeah.
You got to treat us kindly with that.
Yeah.
Be gentle.
You're right.
I will.
I will.
No, I'm going to watch this not thinking that it's going to be amazing.
Okay, cool.
Yeah, come on.
That's the thing.
You know what's a really good thing?
Actually, this will be the best way to end the podcast, I think.
Or you can just end it right now before I even say it.
Is going into something, thinking it's gonna be
the absolute worst thing yes yeah it's the best thing to do ever i've noticed that for even like
when i know a show is gonna be really good yeah i'll be like dude it's gonna be the worst show
of my life because if you think that going into it and it's anything above that dude you're gonna
have the best time of your life at that show that's why i like don't worry darling because
it got so panned and then i went into and i came out I was like hey I actually kind of like that
so the twist kind of worked for me yeah let's go exactly yeah like if you go
into something with a high expectation it's always gonna be bad all of life
better with low expectations right but then sometimes I think life is too
shitty and I'm gonna be a little above that you know that's where the pendulum
will slip yeah it's just a constant tug of war. Same thing as letting immigrants in.
And we'll end it there, guys.
Thank you so much.
Dude, honestly, it was such a pleasure having you.
Thank you, man.
You were like a really good podcaster.
Yeah, you're so fun to talk to.
Yeah, you're very fun to talk to.
If you need a third, I'm in.
Hey, let's go if you need advice these guys are really nice
you wanna know what to do where to go when you need someone to guard you. It's nice to have the girls beside you.
Go with me.
Go with me.
Let's go deep.
I'm going deep.
I'm going deep.