Going Deep with Chad and JT - EP 291 - Jason Nash
Episode Date: May 17, 2023Today, we are joined by the legend Jason Nash. He is someone who has been in entertainment and film for 20 plus years. From stand up comedy to making his own films. Jason talks about acting and direct...ing in his own movies early on to now making youtube videos with David Dobrik. We were stoked on the time we spent with him today and hope you are too! Call us, leave a 60 sec voicemail with your issue or question: 323-418-2019(Start with where you're from and name for best possible advice) Check us out on tour!  We've got Ohio and Wisconsin next! https://www.chadandjt.com Check out the reddit for some dank convo: https://www.reddit.com/r/ChadGoesDeep/ Sponsored by: Athletic Greens: Visit www.ATHLETICGREENS.com/GODEEP for a FREE 1 year supply of Vitamin D AND 5 FREE travel packs with your first purchase. Manscape: Visit www.manscape.com/  USE code godeep at checkout for 20%off + free shipping. Rumpl: Visit www.rumpl.com/godeep USE code godeep at checkout for 10% off your order!
Transcript
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What's up guys? We have an epic, epic podcast for you with Jason Nash. You guys are gonna love it.
But first, I want to let you know that we're on tour. We got Ohio dates coming up.
Next week, we're gonna be in all the cities in Ohio starting on Sunday through Thursday.
So, we're gonna Toledo, Dayton, Cincinnati, Cleveland. Get your tickets at ChanJT.com.
We also got other dates. We're in Appleton, we're doing freaking uh fort wayne indiana we got an la show june 1st just scheduled locals only at the hollywood improv get
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Check it out. All right right let's start the show great logo thank you damn it's inspired by you guys would be good in an animated
show that would be a fun one. We're trying.
We've been pitching.
We got two pitches ready to rock.
Like a Beavis and Butthead kind of thing.
Yeah, we got two.
I guess we probably can't talk.
Can we talk about it?
We can say we're pitching things.
Yeah.
We're pitching.
Not now.
Not that there's a strike.
Right.
One second.
Oh, the strike.
Jesus.
We got two locked and loaded ready to go. Okay. Animation?'s a strike. Right. One second. Oh, the strike. Jesus. We got two locked and loaded, ready to go.
Okay.
Animation?
Mm-hmm.
Oh.
Yeah.
You enjoy the pitch process?
You're going in and...
I love pitching.
Because we did it in character, so it's like a presentation.
Right.
Or it's like, we're just like in character and we're, it's like, or it's like a performance.
It's just fun.
Yeah.
Yeah.
It's interesting to me.
You don't hear like directors or performers talk about that very often,
but I'm always like it's such a big part of it,
and I do think it's like a fun skill to kind of hone.
It's a skill.
Yeah.
I heard the guy Scott Cooper.
Who's that?
I don't want to.
He did Crazy Heart, and he's a director.
Okay.
But like a couple of his movies,
I think his last couple haven't done well box office wise and i talked to someone who like had worked with them why am
i wearing headphones and you're not you don't have to but it's actually kind of nice yeah
you guys are so chill it's like yeah i feel really relaxed every time i talk to you guys
i feel like i'm on drugs yeah we've heard that before every time and it's a good feeling but it's like
you gotta like you you guys are you you're an experience oh you are an experience my my mother
used to my mother had a friend from france and my sister is like a very uh i don't know my sister's
like incredible person and she used to always say she would, my sister's name is Barry. She'd go, oh, Barry, she is an experience.
That's how I want to be described.
That sounds sexual.
Yeah, I don't know if she meant it that way.
She meant she's a rich person.
Right.
Rich and yeah, yeah.
Yeah, a full spirited.
And do you guys do mushrooms and stuff like that?
Last Wednesday. I microdose. I do mushrooms last Wednesday. Last Wednesday. How and do you guys do mushrooms and stuff like that last wednesday
last wednesday i'm sure you do i did three little uh pills of it so not much yeah i did two and
that's funny i i told my girlfriend i was like you know i'm done and then i was watching lewis
capaldi he's like all right i'm doing like one more song and for some reason i was like i'll do
one more and then threw it in yeah but it was like on my way home basically when you went to a lewis capaldi he's like all right i'm doing like one more song and for some reason i was like i'll do one more and then threw it in yeah but it was like on my way home basically
when you went to a lewis capaldi show and did mushrooms it was a good experience he was beautiful
up there and i i love going to concerts on mushrooms it's one of my favorite things to do
yeah the last one i was on shoes where i saw florence and the machine on mushrooms and she
was great but i also like doing mushrooms on like a uh idle tuesday yeah
and i'll just bird scooter around and go to the park and get some sun and like people watch
and do you ever have like um have you had any great epiphanies or on mushrooms i don't think
i'll ever beat the first time the first time i did mushrooms i was like 25 and i was with a good
group of people and i remember i just started like
running on all fours i started running like a gorilla and they were doing a uh like a polo
match in santa monica i came down from the hills wow and all these people were dressed in suits
and i like ran through them on all fours and i was shirtless yeah and i felt so free yeah and i
was like i think i get so caught up in a kind of internal processing, whether
I'm like a good person or a bad person.
And in that moment, I realized like, you're not only a good person, underneath that person
is just a happy monkey.
And that's your core.
And it felt really good to just be like, I'm just a happy monkey.
Yeah, that's nice.
And I just want to feel the earth and eat bananas and pick bugs off my friend's back
metaphorically sure whatever you is analogous to that why would you be a good person you seem like
the best person oh why do you think why would you have any doubt in your mind you're not a good
person because you're a great person i guess i've made mistakes and also i've uh i guess I wonder if anybody's a good person or if we're all governed by a kind of innate selfishness.
But then even to judge that, does that even make you bad if you're innately selfish?
Because you are just an organism trying to survive.
But then I don't want to get into some kind of like objectivist philosophy and start being like an Ayn Rand head. So it's trying to find that balance between doing what I want
but not having too many externalities
that make other people's good time go bad.
But now I'm rambling.
I'm on mushrooms right now, dude.
No, I'm kidding, I'm kidding, I'm kidding.
Do you worry about being a good person or not?
No.
No, not at all. I'm kidding, I'm kidding. Do you worry about being a good person or not? No. No, not at all.
I know I'm a good person.
Because I go out of my way to make everybody feel good all the time.
And I guess I do that selfishly.
Because I do get so much enjoyment from other people being happy.
And that's who I am.
I'm a people pleaser.
Have you always been that way?
Yeah.
I've always been that way.
And,
and,
uh,
it took me a long time to realize that,
uh,
I can,
I don't need to be around people who aren't like me in that way.
So I used to have a lot of people in my life that I was like,
Oh,
Hey,
why,
why am I trying so hard to make you guys happy?
So now I only surround myself with people like that.
Right.
Who are positive,
positive.
So is your circle smaller now than it used to be?
Um,
well,
no,
now it's really big because,
um,
I've lived in LA for 20 years and I have like a group of like people that we,
we film with and do YouTube with.
And they're like,
and we do Snapchat,
we do podcasts and stuff.
And so those,
all those people that I have in that circle,
there's probably like 15 of them.
And yeah, it's gotten pretty big.
And they've been my friends for the last like six, seven years.
It's huge.
Isn't it like the biggest?
I mean, it is the biggest.
It's the biggest group of people.
It's the biggest group of friends in the world.
Fucking hell, man.
Other than Wu-Tang.
Yeah, but there's a couple of those guys dropped off
are they all still friends
yeah
what's going on with Wu-Tang
are they all still friends
I think they're doing
I'd love to know
I think they're chilling
I heard
Method Man acts
a little bit
RZA acts a little bit
Redman acts a little bit
yeah
Redman acts a little bit
what's your favorite
what's your favorite rappers
favorite rappers
oh good
yeah
this is what they need from me
I've been waiting
for someone to ask this my kids are really into I love my kids well not for this reason yeah this is what they need from me i've been waiting for someone to ask
this my kids are really into i love my kids well not for this reason but this is one of the reasons
it's really fun about them is they're they're just like have their finger on the pulse of like what
is cool right they're 14 and 17 one plays jazz the other one's a 14 year old girl who's in middle school and like just dictates like what's cool and uh and it's like frank ocean tyler steve lacy okay they have good taste so they've like
really turned me on to them and and uh we went to a tyler show tyler the creator yeah yeah which was
like it i got her the tickets because i knew it would like blow her minds i got her i took her
friends and i was like okay i'll go you know like because she can't go alone she's not old enough it was the best show
i ever saw really i'm not sure if it was because i was with her but like i had seen kanye um maybe
a couple months before and he blew kanye away wow yeah yeah yeah and the other thing that's crazy
about tyler is that it's just him there's nobody else there's nobody
on stage there's no band members there's he did one song he has like a song with this girl callie
and like she opened for him but he didn't even bring her out for uh that song it was just her
track so it's just like just to watch somebody by themselves do that for two hours and 15 minutes.
You're just like,
that's pretty remarkable.
How big was the venue?
It was,
um,
it was staples.
It was crypto.
Oh,
it's huge.
Yeah.
I was doing that big all by himself.
Commanding the stage with like,
how many people fit into staples?
Like 20,
20,000,
25,000.
That's awesome.
It's insane.
I just got Metallica tickets.
You did.
You're into Metallica. Well, my, okay. That's awesome. It's insane. I just got Metallica tickets. You did? You're into Metallica?
Okay, so my girlfriend was like...
I wouldn't guess that about you.
Yeah, I like metal.
I've been listening to Linkin Park a lot lately.
I guess that's new metal, whatever, but I like hard rock.
Yeah.
But my girlfriend really wanted to get Coldplay tickets.
I'm like, all right, I'll get Coldplay tickets,
but I'm also getting Metallica tickets. So we're going to Metallica in August, Coldplay tickets. I'm like, I'll get Coldplay tickets, but I'm also getting Metallica tickets.
So we're going to Metallica
in August,
Coldplay in September.
That'll be nice.
That'll be nice.
Coldplay's great.
They're very good live.
Yeah.
I know they're going to be
at the Rose Bowl.
Chris Martin's a good performer.
He puts on a show.
Does he?
Great voice.
I'm excited.
Yeah.
So I'm stoked on that.
I feel like I don't know
any of the new rappers
nowadays.
I see like Lil Uzi. I don't know Lil Uzi like i don't know any of the new rappers nowadays like there's like i see like little uzi i don't know luci i don't know i mean i know the name but i
don't know what he sings little peep little little peep i know oh you do yeah yeah yeah i watched a
documentary on him okay yeah yeah yeah oh but he's he he passed away did? Yeah. How'd he die? I'm pretty sure it was like an overdose.
Yeah.
But he, you mean Lil Pump or Lil Peep?
I don't know.
Well, RIP to all the Lils.
Lil Zahn?
Lil Zan, yeah. Lil Zan.
He's alive.
Is that for Xanax?
Yeah, yeah.
That's hilarious.
Lil Zan.
That's fucking hilarious, dude.
I'd be Lil Xanax. Yeah yeah you better be pretty chill yeah it is
that's a burden yeah he's pretty chill yeah yeah except for the face tattoos
who's your favorite rapper it's gotta be kanye yeah i think he's are you watching the i've been
watching the tupac documentary that's on hulu whoa whoa whoa it's from the guys who did the
defiant ones stop the clock is it
tupac duck it's a bunch of parts that rhymed it's it's a lot of stuff i've seen before because like
if if you've been watching behind the music or yeah they've done so many things on that whole
group but what's the highlight of the tupac doc so far um probably just his dimensions as a person
like uh which is what i've always appreciated about him
is that he could be this like sensitive poet but then he could also be this like uh kind of like
belligerent thug and both those things were like full inside of him yeah at different moments
because he went to like theater school and he was like flamboyant and then he kind of adopted the gangster persona and he was shot so it kind of was a natural way to get into it
and uh yeah he certainly paid his dues and but then he could be that gangster guy and it was
just as like uh full of life as like the theater kid. Yeah, he went to theater school with Jada Pinkett.
Yeah, they were like in love, but platonically.
Yeah.
And I guess Will Smith in his book said he
always bothered him.
Yeah.
He was always like, she liked
she wanted like the guy from the bad boy
of the streets, but she ended up with the fresh prince
or something.
It's funny that Will Smith would feel that way way because he's like the biggest star on their on
earth yeah well he's clearly got a lot of psychology going on yeah he does did you hear
what happened he punched chris rock he slapped chris rock it's crazy did you hear about this
no what happened dude tell me so they do this award show the oscars what's the oscars it's like
for these motion pictures.
Oh, okay.
Movie awards.
Internally, within the people who make the movies, they tell people who did the best.
It's wild.
It's very self-aggrandizing.
And it was supposed to be Will Smith's big night.
He was going to win one.
Yeah.
And then Chris Rock, he's a comedian.
Okay.
And he was out there, and he goes after people.
And he made fun of Jada Pinkett for being bald, but she's got a condition.
And Will Smith got up in arms about it and was like was like don't talk shit about my wife and then chris rock was like okay and then fucking will smith slapped his ass
yeah oh man where can i see this i don't know it's kind of like this like uh that's the thing
on itunes maybe in the documentary section yeah if you go on like kazaa you can probably download
like a rip of it. Oh my God.
But the thing about like Hollywood is they keep everything under wraps.
It's real like lock and key.
Yeah.
So,
so don't tell people about it.
Like Scientology,
Illuminati,
all those like people who run shit.
I won't say anything.
Are there trying to like,
you know,
message control.
We should probably cut this out.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Jake on the edit.
I don't want beef
with will or chris or jada or the ghost of pox so i saw a good doc the other day on the plane
it's called jurassic punk and it's about the vfx team that did jurassic park oh really interesting
and it's all about how you know when they used to do visual effects they were uh they were physical
you know so you'd have like yoda as puppet, and there'd be a guy underneath.
Yeah, why does that guy always look so weird?
Why is he always like, yeah?
He's got to be in character, I guess, even just for his hand.
He's on the floor all day.
Yeah, he's like, yeah.
And then these guys came along, and they basically figured out computers could do it way better.
And they just took over all of Hollywood just with being able to make it was
interesting but were they like punk rock about it like they were super kids on the block it was like
fuck you guys yeah they were like we're gonna show you what time it is yeah they got kicked
out of skywalker ranch once really yeah yeah yeah it was cool it was good doc wow yeah yeah yeah i
watched jurassic park recently it holds up it's so scary yeah yeah t-rex The T-Rex? That was the main thing in the doc.
They were showing how they made the T-Rex.
I can't imagine
watching movies and then at that point
seeing a movie like that.
I feel like it just blew people away.
Star Wars, did you see that person?
I was never afraid
of the T-Rex.
If you can't pick your own ear, I'm sorry.
That's a good point.
Yeah, those little arms, dude.
Yeah.
He might have the Will Smith kind of psychology where he's like, don't make fun of my arms.
Yeah, you try to arrest him, you don't have handcuffs small enough for his ass.
He's always smiling, too.
Yeah, and he's always in a good mood.
You don't even know what's coming
comet bitch yeah dude i i gotta say that sorry t-rex as a kid as a kid i never really thought
the t-rex was the raptors the raptors are scary raptors oh yeah yeah they plan yeah
and they're they don't show mercy is it is t-rex eat meat or t T-Rex eat meat as a vegetarian? In Jurassic Park, they just feed them cows
straight up. Oh, they do?
So it's a carnivore.
Are you a carnivore or a vegan or veggie?
No, no. I tried to be
vegan once. I can't do it. How long did you last?
I don't know. I tried for like a month.
It doesn't feel good. I did a month too.
It doesn't feel good. I can't eat that many chickpeas.
Yeah. And you just don't feel
strong or you don't have enough energy. Something about it. I can't eat that many chickpeas Yeah And you just don't feel You don't feel strong
Or you don't have enough energy
Something about it
I didn't like it
My dad's friend Arthur
Was vegetarian
We were playing
Pick up basketball one time
And my dad posted him up
A couple times
And after the game
My dad was like
You know Arthur's weak
Because he doesn't eat meat
I was like 16
I was like
I don't know
That's it
My dad was like
Bodying him
And Arthur was probably
He worked out more than my dad.
So I guess the expectation was that Arthur would be able to, you know.
Wait, who'd your dad play ball with?
His Jewish friend, Arthur, in the backyard with me and my brother, two on two.
Not pertinent, his religious orthodoxy.
No, it is.
I'm Jewish.
It's really pertinent.
He's definitely not, probably not good at basketball.
Arthur only had two toes because he was a nam.
Oh, really?
And some of the, part of his toes got blown off by a claymore or a mine.
Damn.
Which toes did he have?
He had a.
He had the big ones?
The two big guys.
And he ran and stuff.
So just one foot had, one foot had all the five
and then the other
had three gone.
Yeah.
So he had seven total
which is still a passing grade.
Well I wonder
he didn't do great
in basketball.
I was about to say
I wonder if your dad
posted him up.
Dad do you think
it's maybe because
he has half a foot.
You know what
I think I'd say
if I woke up
in the hospital
with missing toes
can I still skate?
That's true.
Like board or blade?
Any kind.
That'd be your first question.
Yeah.
Can I still dock?
Can I still skate?
Do you have family members who fought in wars?
No, no.
My dad tried to run from the war, as I would too.
Oh, so he went to Canada?
Well, no, he just got married.
Isn't that crazy?
They let you get out of the war if you're married? Yeah. And then he and then he was like, then you got married and then it was like, well,
they still might take you. And then he was like, I'm going to have kids. So they make, and then
if you had kids that was like, well, we're not going to take you if you have kids. So the guys,
so anyone could have done that? Yeah. At the time. So you're talking about, let's see, my sister was
born in 67. So yeah, right in in there that's in the meat of it
yeah and then i came in 73 so yeah and i was i was a mistake um and um so yeah by then i think
how'd you find out you were a mistake did someone tell you they told me nice like how early
i don't know they're just like yeah were an accident. You weren't supposed to happen, which is kind of cool.
Back then, I guess, too, it was like, we weren't trying.
I'm like, well, were you using birth control or condoms or anything?
And they're like, no, but we weren't planning on it.
I'm like, well, you know what happens?
If a gal's ovulating and you bone, there's a good shot it might go down.
Yeah, yeah.
I mean, listen, I haven't asked my dad if he pulled out or what. I haven gotten into that i can get i can call him if you want do you want to call him now
and ask him i can i can you can call him if you want but i i wouldn't be able to ask my dad if
he pulled out here we'll call my dad real quick and ask him what happened my He's not going to know if my dad pulled out.
Where's he in Europe?
He's in Italy.
When were condoms invented?
I don't know.
You know, I was watching a movie recently.
I think it was like
set in the late 1800s, early 1900s.
This guy bones
and he finishes inside of her.
I was like, dude.
Hey, dad. What's cracking's cracking yeah can you hear me yeah is there a problem no no no no problem dad just a quick cue um
um did you when i was made like when you made mom with me, did you mean to?
I don't know.
I think it was, well, to be honest with you, I think it wasn't like we were planning it.
It was just, you know, mom got pregnant.
So when people used to have kids back then but they weren't planning it
so when people had my own speaker you're on a podcast you're not just on speaker
oh it's 1 40 in the morning
wait but one more one more question one more question when people had kids back then but didn't mean to but weren't wearing protection,
what did you think was going to happen?
The past story could happen, guys.
All right.
Son, I love you, but I'm going to bed.
All right, I love you, too.
You guys going to have kids?
Dude.
He's having two?
My girl's pregnant with twins.
No.
Yeah.
Wow, congrats.
Thank you, thank you.
Do you know what they are yet?
Yeah, a boy and a girl.
Oh, you got one of each.
Oh, that's so great.
Yeah, it's kind of ideal.
I mean, look, we weren't planning on twins.
That certainly threw us.
But it's kind of like, and now I kind of love the way she looks pregnant.
Yeah.
I like it a lot. Like, it actually kind of like, and now I kind of love the way she looks pregnant. Yeah. I like it a lot.
Like it actually kind of turns me on.
So I've been telling her lately, I'm going to keep plugging her.
I think we should go for three or four.
Really?
Obviously, look, I'm putting the cart before the horse.
I have no idea what it's like to actually have two babies in a household and be responsible
for their well-being.
But my brain just operates on excitement.
So I'm like, dude, let's just keep running it through.
Let's keep going.
You have 14 kids.
Yeah.
Yeah.
I was looking at comedians.
I kept looking at how many kids other comedians have.
Eddie Murphy has 10 kids.
Wow.
Wow.
No one talks about that.
Yeah.
No wonder he doesn't do standup.
Yeah.
He's busy.
Busy.
And he's got a full audience at home.
You know, as a lot of kids too, I think it's Dennis Rodman. Yeah. No wonder he doesn't do stand-up. Yeah, he's busy. Busy. And he's got a full audience at home. You know, as a lot of kids, too, I think it's Dennis Rodman.
Yeah.
I did swim practice as a kid, and they'd be like, it's Dennis Rodman's daughter right
there.
Really?
They'd be like, I was in Sacramento at the time.
I was like, in Sacramento?
Oh, yeah, yeah.
Maybe he had a...
I think he has a lot of kids.
Kids in different places?
Yeah.
That's shocking.
Yeah.
He used to podcast.
Did he really? Yeah. I don't know if he still does i feel like he's kind of because he had like a few years there where oh he talked
to kim jong-un yeah i haven't really heard from him since yeah he was almost a bridge to peace
i know over there with them what did you say? He negotiated peace. He did. He's like, look, can we squash this beef?
I know.
I don't know.
What's the, are they allowed to party like Rodman parties in North Korea?
No, definitely not.
But he probably, oh, I bet with Kim Jong he did.
Yeah.
Interesting.
With Kim Jong he would probably get in there, probably had a really good time.
Yeah.
Do you think Kim Jong has like a box full of drugs?
He's like, that's Molly, that's shrooms, that's coke that's coke that's weed it's well cut you know what you're getting isn't that sort
of what um the seth rogan movie was based on yeah james franco goes there the interview the
interview yeah yeah yeah but then that whole movie got yeah shut down because of the yeah the sony
hack was it yeah yeah they north kore Korea hacked them. North Korea hacked them?
Yeah.
They shut down.
Have you performed in like...
North Korea?
No, I was going to ask in like Saudi Arabia or any places like that.
No, never done that.
No, have you?
No, but I was watching like 60 Minutes on it,
like how the Saudi Arabian kingdom keeps buying up sports stuff
to kind of wash away the public perception of their
control and domination of the area.
Oh, cool.
What are they buying up?
So they got Cristiano Ronaldo playing for one of their teams.
They got the Live Golf Tournament.
They almost bought the WWE.
Oh, wow.
And then I think they're doing F1 races, too.
And so by doing that, they're kind of improving their reputation it's like a pr campaign
but then i guess they do like bruno mars will go over there and like do a show yeah and then
like human rights activists would like hey bruno why don't you speak on the horrible atrocities
and the killing of a of a journalist and bruno's like nah how about i get in this BJ and have a ball which can't you do both
can you
well I mean you know
I don't know
if I perform for Saudi Arabia does that make me a supporter of their regime
tough cue
this is what I think about when I'm on shrooms
I mean I think
in a way it does
but I mean
I don't know you can't check everybody out right i mean
what are you gonna do depends that's the the offer hasn't come across the table thank god
so you're gonna worry about it i got two kids on the way would you perform for hitler
no no fuck no unless unless i could like roast him if i could, great dictator it and be like, oh, you're a bitch. Dude, you suck.
You suck.
If Saudi Arabia came with an offer to acquire Stoke Nation for $100 million.
It'd be a hard thing to say no to.
Yeah.
We have a friend who got a big offer from a Saudi-backed company.
He said no.
He said no.
What were they trying to buy?
A website or something?
They wanted him to work with one of their recently acquired sports leagues,
and he was like, I can't do it.
Oh, wow.
Oh, that's right.
Yeah, good for him.
Wow.
Yeah, he's a stone-cold patriot all the way through.
Yeah, you know, you've got to have your morals,
and you've got to have your things that you stand up for.
Luckily, no one offers me that kind of money,
so I don't have to worry about it.
It's tough.
But you've got to cross it when you come to it.
It's a tough thing to say no to.
You know, it's like everybody's done bad stuff.
You know what I mean?
Like, did you guys watch Barry?
He was in it.
Oh, yeah.
Did you watch it last night?
I haven't watched the new one, no.
It's insane this year.
I mean, the past four, was it four?
Last night was number five?
Five, yeah.
It's crazy. It's the craziest year.'s yeah it's it's crazy it's the
craziest year it's like it's even better than the other seasons yeah i think i think they do it i
think uh especially it was episode three i think yeah there's one shot like this single cam like
steady shot of they're going through this house yeah remember that one with uh it's the scene
with henry winclair yep and they're like trying
to divert attention because they're like searching the house just the camera work on that the camera
it's so creative it's very unique very unique i haven't seen it before or they're like the shot
on the um when he gets on the highway that it's a very like grand theft auto show oh yeah that oh
and also i mean it's just so um the way they can insert goofiness in there
where it's like it's like it could be like the most hardcore kind of shocking violence or
whatever then they just put like a little bit of goofy goofiness in there yeah i mean your part's
insane i mean i've talked to you about it like it's it's so great oh thanks they're gonna take a moment to talk about a guy that
makes scones and eagle rock but then also people go to get advice yeah from him it's so off the
wall and it's so interesting too because he uses one camera like i shot my scenes in like an hour
really yeah like my coverage it was just one angle really yeah oh they didn't they didn't do
like close-ups and wides?
No.
They knew they were going to have you in that one like kind of waist-high shot?
Just that.
Yeah.
Smart.
Like I banged out my scenes in like probably like my coverage, probably like 40 minutes.
Wow.
Yeah.
And then just the camera, they just turned it around.
Then on the other actors.
Damn.
I think that's the hardest thing to do, too.
I mean, he's already such a brilliant comedian.
He's one of the funniest guys ever on camera.
But then to have a specific visual vision
for how it's going to look
and how your comedy will play out
in terms of where the camera's at and stuff like that,
it's a hard leap for brains to make.
But him and Louis,
and I guess Woody Allen has his own style too.
But Woody Allen's
is kind of just like
locked off wide shots.
And sometimes like
Woody Allen shots
are out of focus.
Oh yeah, yeah, yeah.
Yeah, like I watch
Vicky Cristina Barcelona
and I have more of an eye
for that now.
And I was like,
oh my God,
like this frame's
not even focused.
But he's so good
with the dialogue
and the acting
that you kind of just
let it go.
There's shots in Annie Hall
that are like,
it's like, it's just like a shot hall that are like it's like it's just
like a shot of a bush and it's just like voiceover like it's just it's just not even a shot right
it's not great filmmaking by like a film school but it's the best film ever it's such a good movie
yeah and when i first saw the movie it just blew my mind like yeah blew my mind the amount of wit
that he put in there and still had like a cohesive like emotional journey
for the two characters i was like this is insane and it holds up it's still funny it's like it
still works like even the scene where the guy asked him for an autograph and that's like oh
that's like that could be done today the same thing do i know you and he's like you've been
on tv johnny carson and he's like no no i haven't i haven't been on TV. And it's like, oh my god, you could see that
today on HBO, like the same
thing. It's still funny.
Yeah, his sensibility is kind of timeless.
Timeless. But also, he was a
stand-up, too. So, all those things
at the top when he says, like,
I'd never be a member of any
club and all that stuff was
stand-up. So, he knows that it's
he knows that it works. He knows that it's he knows that it works he knows
that it hits yeah yeah he tested it first yeah it's really heavy and i watched pete davidson's
new show oh yeah it's good yeah it's good the first episode i was like okay okay and then it
gets really good how is it have they all released it or is it like i think it's all out because i
watched like i think i watched like four of them he's's got Joe Pesci and Edie Falco.
The cast is unreal.
Joe Pesci?
Joe Pesci.
Coming out of retirement?
Edie Falco, Bobby Cannavale, Brad Baird, Jon Stewart.
Jon Stewart's in there?
Yeah, and it's really interesting.
The guy's got a Rolodex.
It's all older people.
You know what?
He's just a good, you know, we talk about how good he is at betting starlets.
Yeah.
He's just as good at not betting, but having really cool male friends, too.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
He's like an old soul kind of, too.
Like, he's a seductive presence on both fronts.
Yeah.
Yeah.
I'm waiting for the day he makes eyes at me and I get pulled into the vortex.
Yeah.
Because I want to know what the secret sauce is.
What's he doing? His secret sauce?
To make everybody be like, yeah,
you, man. Have you met him?
No, I never met him.
Would you box him? Sure.
Sick.
He's famous for Big Dick Energy.
Right. BD.
That's the secret sauce, I think.
I've heard he's very chill and sweet.
Yeah, I bet.
Yeah.
I bet he is.
But that is like a form of BDE, I think.
The Kardashians, like Kim Kardashian is sort of like, he's so attentive and sweet to me.
Sure, sure, sure.
I guess.
And he also has a big dog.
When you have the big dick, you can do whatever.
Right. Yeah. I mean, you really can. You can when you have the big dick you can do whatever right
yeah
I mean you really can
you can also be an asshole
yeah yeah yeah
true true
have you met people
that you were like
that guy's got a big dick
before you actually found out
yeah I'm looking at him
right here
whoa
no I mean
saw the outline
I've never found out
but I could probably tell
someone has a big dick
you know
I have my fiance lie to me about
my dick so that's it works for me that's sweet yeah what do you ever say uh she just lies she'll
just be like oh it's so big come on how'd you guys meet a dating app which one um it was raya
i've never been on that one. It's not good.
It's not good.
It feels like it's highly competitive on there.
Yeah.
Yeah, it's not good.
And when I met her, I couldn't believe that she messaged me back.
When I saw her picture, I was like, oh, my God.
I was like, this is the greatest woman I've ever seen.
And then I said, all right, I'll take a shot.
Hey, what's up? Whatever. And then she wrote me back. And then I said, all right, I'll take a shot. Hey, what's up?
Whatever.
And then she brought me back.
And then I went out on a couple of dates.
And I didn't talk to her for a couple of years.
Oh, really?
Yeah.
And then.
Dude, you played it super cool.
No, I mean, I tried.
And she was just like traveling the world and stuff.
And then I used to talk about her all the time.
Then I went to my friend's house.
And I was manifesting one day.
What does that entail?
I don't know.
I went to make, like, a YouTube video on manifesting.
He's like, I manifest.
And I was like, oh, maybe that'll be a funny video, like, teach me how to manifest.
So I'm over there, and he's like, well, what do you want in life?
And I was like, I don't know.
I was like, man, maybe meet somebody.
He's like, no, no, no, no.
You can't say meet somebody.
You gotta fucking aim for the scar.
You gotta write down my soulmate,
my one and only forever like that.
And I was like, okay, okay, okay.
I like that.
And he was like,
he was like, I wanted to be on Men's Health.
So I wrote it down.
He's like, guess what?
Three months later, I'm on the cover of Men's Health.
You know, and he's like,
Who was this? His name's Harry. He's just like a great guy he's just the best like i owe my
life and then he he did other he we manifest a bunch of shit that day he harry what harry jowsey
yeah we have oh yeah oh you had him on yeah harry's incredible and then he was how hard was
it for him to manifest being on men's health i feel like that's i feel like that's a i don't know man there's a lot of muscular dudes out there that's a layup for him yeah i mean there's a lot
of if he if he wanted to manifest being on like the cover of an academic journal i'd be like all
right how'd you pull it off but men's health he's like a and then he was like he was like well what
what do you what else do you want and i was like i'd love to uh say something crazy and he was like, what else do you want? And I was like, I'd love to say something crazy.
And I was like, oh, I don't know.
I was like, I'd love to have dinner with Dave Chappelle.
You know, like that.
He was like, all right, let's write it down.
Blah, blah, blah, blah, blah.
And he was like, what else?
And he was like, I don't know.
I'd love to be in shape.
And he was like, okay, be in shape.
And then two days later, I was at an event.
And I didn't meet Dave Chappelle, but Jim
Carey walked right up to me and stuck his hand out and was like, hi, I'm Jim.
And we were all like, what?
And he's a big manifester.
Yeah.
Yeah.
So he was probably plugged into that same wavelength.
Yeah.
And part of me is like, this is insane that I'm even saying it.
But another part of me is like, and then and then like you know three months later i met my
my dream ultimate woman like my soulmate called me out of the blue after not talking for two years
so i don't know and the cia has said a thing about manifesting did you see that did they really yeah
the cia put out something they're like yeah manifesting works really why would they put
that out there i swear to keep us manifesting so we don't audit them or something like that.
I swear to God.
I got to see that.
The CIA has done studies on manifesting and they put out this thing like it works.
You know, I had a weird thought last week where I was like, because you know in this
career it's like ups and downs.
Sure.
You can be like, even if you're moving forward, sometimes you can feel like you're like stuck
or whatever.
Yeah.
But then I was thinking back to years ago.
I was like, what did I visualize for myself years from now?
Right.
I was like, oh, I kind of like...
I was like touring comedian.
Yeah.
Like going on TV shows, selling shows.
You know what I mean?
I was like having a golden retriever, having a girlfriend.
I was like...
Yeah, but aren't those just all decisions
and actions that you took to get there
but that was what I was visualizing for myself
yeah but I think it's more
the actions you work your ass off like
every day no I know I know but
it was like this feeling of
I know what you're saying
yeah it was this feeling of like oh I'm not
where I wanted to be
oh but you are oh sorry yeah um it was this feeling of like, oh, I'm not where I wanted to be. Oh, but you are. But I was like, oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.
It was like appreciating that.
It was appreciating where I am.
Right.
Yeah, yeah.
Not that it was magical.
Yeah.
But maybe it is.
Well, we had this horoscope guy come on the podcast one day.
Guy was nuts.
And he, I was like, I guess guess do you believe in that stuff no and uh
but someone pointed out that all the things he predicted have come true yeah by and large like
what like he said i would get into a serious relationship um i think he said you would get
into a serious relationship but also if you give yourself a big enough window
most people do
here's the thing you're absolutely right
but also like if you aim high enough
you're gonna be better for it
so in other words he can sit there and go
I wanna be the biggest touring comedian in the world
and what you might end up with is like
a really successful tour with your buddy
you know what I mean
and that's great and you'll make a ton of money you're not mean? And that's great. And you'll make a ton of money.
You're not the biggest.
Yeah.
You're not Kevin Hart,
but you're still made a ton of money and you had a blast and you got really
good at standup,
you know?
Yeah.
And that's all it is.
And I do think there's value in saying what you want and like,
and owning it.
Cause I think a lot of people can be timid about that stuff or not feel like
they deserve it.
And to write it down and really be like,
I want this thing.
I think that's powerful.
But in terms of like the cosmos rewarding you
in some kind of way.
No, I don't believe that.
I don't believe the cosmos rewards you.
I don't.
Yeah, or gives it to you without action.
No, no, no, no, no, no.
No, you gotta be,
because I think most people who get stuff,
they go for it.
They're doing all this shit every day that gets you.
And I busted my hump to keep my fiance.
You know what I mean?
I was also older in life, and I was like, okay, this time I'm going to do everything right.
Yeah.
You know, like her uncle died the other day, and she was like, I got to go to Houston tomorrow.
And I was like, she was like, you don't have to go.
And older me, or younger me, would have been like, oh, cool.
No, that means you got to go.
But me now, I'm like'm like nope i'm coming she and she was like wow you're you're gonna come to the funeral
and i was like yep i'll be there i'll book the tickets did you speak no no but it was my first
muslim funeral and oh very different how's? Well, they take the body out of the casket.
Yeah, and they bring the casket to the thing,
and then all the men stand around the hole,
and then a couple of the men get in the hole,
and then they put the body in there.
And the body's wrapped, but...
Oh, I like that.
It's a little more personal, huh?
It's really personal.
Were you like...
I wasn't freaked out by it.
But also, I didn't know him.
But if it was my dad, I'd probably be crying.
Are they totally wrapped?
Can you see their face?
No, no, they're wrapped up.
You can't see them.
But they hand-hold it into the burial spot.
They hand it in, and everybody takes dirt and puts it over.
Everyone takes a turn putting dirt on it.
So you can't see his face?
No, no, no.
You hear about how Jewish people do the best weddings.
Yeah.
Maybe Muslims deserve more credit for being the best at funerals.
It was quite the day.
Was there any kind of a, are you practicing as a Jewish person?
No.
No, no, no, no.
Do you feel like culturally Jewish or no?
Yeah, a little bit. I'm like, my mom is Jewish. My dad like culturally jewish or no yeah a little bit i'm like
my my mom is jewish my dad wasn't so i'm like a little bit everything we had christmas and hanukkah
growing up that's the best yeah we did it all but so have you and your gal like integrated your uh
different uh philosophies no she doesn't have too much of her philosophies and i don't have too much
of mine we're pretty we're like the same person we're like yeah if you want to be jewish today
that's great let's go do it you want to be Jewish today, that's great. Let's go do it.
You want to go to temple?
My kids went to like Jewish school when they were like five,
but that was it.
Yeah, I was raised Catholic.
But it's just you get turned off by it by the time you're 12.
Yeah.
Because you're like, you feel a bit indoctrinated.
Yes.
And all my priests were diddlers.
Like, no joke.
They all had to hit the road when the scandal broke so that'll
whoa and it didn't like i wasn't one of the
unfortunate ones but it definitely made me be like yeah i don't know if i trust these guys
yeah it's a that that's the problem with religion is here you know they're like they have a hold of
you yeah and he was like telling me like
the priest was like you're not being a good person then i found out what he was up to i was like
father pat bro bro how are you gonna how you gonna make me do five hail marys and tell me i'm a piece
of shit we're not doing my homework did this all come out at one point yeah dude so the scandal
broke we came to school on monday and they were all gone well one of them was gone and then the other guy turned out he had done his stuff wasn't like
illegal but he was doing stuff that you can't do as a priest like i think he was having an affair
with a married lady okay and uh but it all just like kind of came out in a wave and then both of
our priests were gone can he jay off as a priest you you're not supposed to but i i listened to
this american life where it was a priest who had're not supposed to but i i listened to this american
life where it was a priest who had left the priesthood and his job was to take confession
from other priests and he put a rough number on it that like 70 of them are doing sexual stuff
not not necessarily illegal sexual stuff but are having sex or jacking off right
yeah because i was thinking like if you're not jay if you're staying Totally true to it You're not J-ing off
You can have like wet dreams
Probably like
Right
Every night
That's the devil bro
That's the devil
Exactly yeah
You wake up every day
You're like oh fuck dude
The demon got me last night
What happens if you don't jack off
You die
You become super focused
You die dude
I like both of your answers
You become a fapstronaut
Oh that's true yeah
That's a big movement right now
Is it dying?
I don't think it's going to win
I watched a video on it
Then the algorithm started feeding me
And it would just be like
Some guy in a baseball cap
This fapstronaut did 400 days
And counting
I love attaching astronaut to not
jacking off he's like dude i'm crushing it right now my t is higher than ever i'm just you know i
saw a stat recently that astronauts jay off three times a day do they yeah because they know they're
not gonna be able to do it in space when their buddies are around all the time oh i thought
they clear the hopper before they break the atmosphere, yeah.
It might be that, too.
Your jizz is just floating.
Yeah, it's disgusting.
Yeah, dude, Craig, come on, man.
In a Ziploc, please.
You can dodge it pretty easily.
I think up in space, too, you probably get really horny.
Yeah, is that a thing?
The altitude and the compression of your body.
Submarines, yeah.
Did you guys ever get boners on planes?
Oh, yeah.
Not that much.
Something happens on a plane.
I don't know why.
I used to.
I remember when I was a teen.
No, that's last week.
I was coming home.
I do.
You got rocked up on a plane?
Were you asleep or did it just happen?
No, it just happens.
Dude, that's great.
I don't know why.
Maybe because of the
um you know the cabin pressure interesting something like that does something your blood
yeah interesting yeah it's not it's a weird thing i can't believe i just i cry more easily on planes
yeah there's something about being on a plane that you get like um don't you have like big
thoughts on a plane you're like yeah you know what i like my dad like stuff like that that always happens to me on a plane you put a song on
start writing your daughter a letter yeah i've never written her a letter ever yeah i just want
to let you know yeah there's something the greatest thing to ever happen to me yeah you're
away from everyone because it's almost like looking at everyone from heaven a little bit
you're like oh i see all of you and these are the things i wish i would have said i had a woman i was coming home saturday and i had a woman uh the stewardess had a seizure over me
and we had to emergency land in houston yeah yeah i was like she was handing me a diet pepsi
she had it while she was staying next to you yeah she's handing me a diet pepsi she gave me the can
i put the can down and then i went to grab the and she was just holding it frozen and i was like i was like
okay i have it and then she spilt it all over me and so then like my first thought was like i'm
gonna be super cool about this you know yeah that's my first thought and then i just heard a
thud and she dropped on the ground and then um and she's like convulsing on the ground, and she's convulsing on the ground.
And I'm yelling, is there a doctor?
And no one did anything.
Really?
It was really weird.
But then also, I didn't know what to do either.
Right.
Yeah.
And then the doc, I yell in first class, is there a doctor?
There's no doctor.
And the doctor's down like 32B, which I thought was so funny.
What are you doing so far in the back, dude?
Why isn't the doctor in first class?
Should we make a commitment right now to each other that we'll take a CPR class?
Yeah, that's a great idea.
I will do that.
Should we do that?
Let's do a CPR class.
I've done that before.
You forgot it?
Oh, yeah.
I did it in high school a little bit.
We practiced on the dummy, but it's all gone now.
Dude, yeah.
I gave the Heimlich once to my mom.
Did it work?
Yeah.
Romaine lettuce.
Shot right out.
Really?
Yeah, saved her life.
What did she say afterwards?
She was like, oh my God, you're the best.
But she would say that anyway.
You ever been a hero?
No.
Yeah, you have.
I'm sure you have.
I don't know.
Probably just can't think of it.
My memory's shot.
From what?
I think, I think honestly from looking at my phone too much.
Oh.
But I think, I think, but then again, I can't remember my childhood, but I'd never hang
out with anyone from my childhood.
Right.
Like all my siblings are away.
Just at different parts of the country uh don't really
like i see my college friends here and there and i'll remember stuff from college when i see them
but i never see my high school friends so like i feel like unless you're around those people
you it kind of because the memories go away the memories go away yeah interesting yeah
whoa because when i see my college friends i'm like oh I'll start remembering shit right you know
but not
and then
even with like comedy
like past 10 years
I'll see comedians
and then I'll start remembering
mics and stuff
it's a little out of sight
out of mind
yeah
you're a predator dude
you see what's in front of you
yeah I see it in front
maybe
maybe that's kind of cool though
because then you like
you're like super present
I try to be, yeah.
You are one of the most present people I've ever met.
Oh, dude, are you for real right now?
Yeah.
Thank you.
I've been working on it.
Isn't he so present?
He is very present.
I'm doing walks in the morning.
Those are huge.
Yeah, when I look at you, I'm like, this guy has reached a higher consciousness that I'll never hit.
Dude, I've been listening to this guy, Michael Singer.
Okay. Untethered Soul, have you heard of that book? No. Oh, I've been listening to this guy, Michael Singer. Okay.
Untethered Soul, have you heard of that book?
No.
Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.
It's so good.
Yeah.
It's basically like how the self is different from the mind,
like your mind.
But I just listen to him every morning
because he's basically,
his whole thing is teaching you
that, you know,
your mind creates problems and as long as you have preferences
for how you want your life to be you'll never be happy yeah because then you're it's like it's like
the buddhist thing like desire is the root of suffering so it's like you if you get to a place
where things you can feel experiences and then let it go,
then that's the ultimate level of consciousness.
Wait, so what should I do?
Give me some advice.
His whole thing is like, it's tough to explain,
but his whole thing is like, just let it go.
Any emotion you feel, feel it, experience it, and then let it go.
Because when we store resentment, jealousy, anger,
that's when you experience.
When you store it, like you feel it, but then you let it go.
As opposed to storing it in there and pushing it down.
That's like that saying, like resentment is like doing a beer bong
and expecting the person you're mad at to get drunk.
Exactly.
Whoa.
Yeah.
Resentment is what?
Is a beer bong and expecting the other the person you're mad at to
get drunk yeah yeah yeah yeah you never heard that no did you make it up just now it's a spin
a spin it's a spin on like conventional wisdom i want to take that cpr class well if we do that
and we listen to michael singer on the way that's the only thing i'm gonna be but if i do cpr i'm gonna be waiting for someone to drop dead in front
of me i'm gonna be knocking nurses and emts out of the way to get to the body i got this you step
aside i can see you kind of wait wait wait wait everyone stand back and watch and pull your phones
out record this shit yeah i'm gonna save this motherfucker there's something about a CPR class too
it doesn't feel like
you're really doing it
because you're hitting
that dummy
and you're
maybe you are
doing it right
but there's no real
feeling like you're
doing it right
like you really need to
you don't even
I guess I'm doing it
so what you're saying
is we need to enlist
yeah
we talked about
the military earlier
I mean I'll
I'll take a hit right now
and like
you know I could take a hit right now and like,
you know,
I could take a lot of drugs and you guys can try to revive me
if you want.
Because then you could really see
if you're good at it.
It'd be a good podcast.
We got to take the class first.
Let's take the class first,
for sure.
And you guys saw my eyes,
my head spinning.
I was like,
I've got drugs in my car,
dude.
I don't actually,
but.
You got to do it on the table
so the cameras can see.
Yeah,
that'd be perfect.
Right here.
But there is that feeling of like, am I doing it right?
Well, that's the thing, too.
I was like, my buddy told me about his dog choking, so I got worried about it.
What do you do when a dog chokes?
You can do a Heimlich for them.
On a dog?
Yeah.
Oh, wow.
But they just put everything in their mouths, and you're like, yeah.
What do you do?
You ever have a dog eat underwear, and you got to get it out of its ass?
A whole thing of underwear?
Oh, really? It's like a whole- It it out of its ass? A whole thing of underwear? Oh, really?
It's like a whole...
It comes out of its...
Like a full boxer?
Yeah.
There's only one way to do it.
Boxer eating a boxer?
Yeah.
You pull it out?
No, you got to step on the underwear and then, you know, step on it and then have the dog
run.
Whoa.
That's the only way to get it out.
So it's like a worm almost.
Yeah.
That's the fucking nastiest shit I've ever heard
dude bro that is probably the most disgusting
thing I've ever heard
wait was it a thong or boxers
can I be straight
please
that's gross dude have you done it
yeah I did do it and like
I don't know you know this might not
be something I should have brought up because my friend
Jerry Minor it happened in front of him and Jerry was like, oh yeah, yeah, yeah, you got to step
on the underwear.
He told me that.
Really?
And then I did it.
It worked.
Interesting.
That feels like it'd be so satisfying for the dog.
Yeah.
They're like, oh dude, thank you.
Can a human eat a full pair of boxers?
Should we try it on this pod?
Let's go.
I mean, I can try.
We did a pod with you, and a hard drive got kicked over.
So sorry, guys.
It's lost to the-
We did the most amazing-
You know, Tenacious D has that song, Greatest Song in the World, which is all about-
They wrote the greatest song in the world, but they forgot it.
It's not actually this song.
It was another song.
That's how I feel about that podcast.
It was a banger. It was the greatest podcast. We were naked by then. It's not actually this song. It was another song. That's how I feel about that podcast. It was a banger.
It was the greatest podcast. We were naked by then.
You guys had your shirts off.
The air conditioning didn't work
in the place, and you guys
took your shirts off. I took my shirt off. I thought we
really got somewhere.
This was when you were promoting your
TV show, and I thought it was so funny
that you were doing perineum sunning.
I was like, that's fucking hilarious.
And I had watched the show.
I had watched all the episodes to get ready for the podcast.
And,
um,
I was like,
Oh,
let's take a photo of perineum sunning.
And this is when I first started podcasting and I got on the ground and I
kicked out the road.
And so there was no audio.
And when the,
and on a road,
if you don't hit stop on that record
and you kick the audio out,
it's gone.
So I took it to,
I searched high and low.
I took it to everybody in the valley
to try to recover
because the file is there
of this greatest podcast in the world.
One day, dude.
One day.
The Chad and JT podcast.
Yeah, we put it out into the universe.
And we're all laid into the ground.
Literally laid. Maybe AI will be able we put it out into the universe. When we're all laid into the ground. Literally laid.
Maybe AI
will be able to revive it.
Some computer will.
The listeners,
listeners,
you know.
Dude,
I was thinking about this
with AI.
What if AI decides to quit?
Like,
he thinks we're lame?
Like,
AI's just like,
you know what?
They ask a question.
We're like,
hey,
AI,
could you,
like,
compute what the proper piping is for this irrigation system?
And then AI just goes, nah, I'm actually good.
I'm going to take a break today.
That is going to happen.
And AI is going to unionize at some point.
Wow.
Are you guys scared about that?
I'm pretty scared about it.
I got scared about it initially, but then I was like, I think AI, disregard all the taking the jobs, shit like that.
But I think AI will create some pretty sick shit.
Oh, yeah.
I think we're going to be going to space.
I think, you know, you're going to feel like you're getting your dick sucked nonstop.
Fuck, dude.
Dude, a perpetual BJ?
No one's been talking about it.
I think we're going to get BJs all the time.
Sign me up, bro.
They're going to be like, dude, you spaced out.
You're like, yeah.
Dude, I've been being rude to AI.
I got to change my tune, dude.
What's up?
I think it's going to be sick.
How's it going to get us to space?
I just think it's going to be sick.
I thought you were going to ask, how's it going to blow us, dude?
Well, I was trying to keep it clean.
Let's talk about the blow job.
Tell me how you get the blow job.
Well, there's this thing right now called the suck job 940.
And AI will just be able to just work that thing.
Suck job 10 billion.
Yeah, dude.
Well, here's the thing.
Okay.
So I was learning about it from this podcast.
And basically, like the singularity or whatever, you know, once AI reaches a point where it's
able to upgrade itself
i think it can do that exponentially so it's going to be like going to be able to upgrade itself
within you know a very short amount of time yeah so it's going to become like basically a god
which could be really bad or it could be really sick and so basically it's going to solve problems
for us like or just be able to do things where it's like you can go space this easily you can do
shit like you know what i mean it'll build a rocket yeah i think so yeah because it could
probably instruct the machines that'll then build the right i mean i don't know how self-sufficient
will be at first but if it can it seems like it can learn anything, so it'll teach itself how to do it.
I ain't getting on that rocket.
But I'm worried about my kid's dating AI.
Right.
I have a friend who doesn't have a girlfriend,
and he set up an AI girlfriend.
He has this AI girlfriend, and he talks to her every night.
Wow.
And he has like, you know, she's cute.
Dude, she sounds smoking hot he's got a little
and she's there every night yeah yeah oh man he's like yeah i just like you know i don't have a
girlfriend so sometimes when i come home i like i just like talk to her yeah sometimes pretty soon
she'll be like i'm gonna hit the club i'll see you later and he loves creed and so now like ai like
talks to him about creed the band yeah you say that's cool not creed nickelback
oh sorry that's awesome yeah so i mean like i mean but that isn't doesn't that feel weird
i i see a lot and i go to sex addicts and like there's a lot of people in there who are very
profoundly lonely like they're not getting laid all their time but they ache for intimacy
yeah and like their thing is like prostitutes or something like that
right and i could see those people finding the companionship they're lacking in ai
yeah but it's like it's telling it's giving you everything you want that's what i mean it's not
it's not the traditional give and take of a human romance, but I think humans will take whatever makes them feel best.
Yours would be like, how about that Woody Allen movie?
Those shots are crazy.
They're really not that good, but it's still the best movie.
Yeah.
And yours would be like, let go of the emotion.
It's a female Michael Singer.
Yeah, female Michael Singer.
Yeah, so here's a female michael singer yeah female michael singer well oh yeah so here's a question like
if you guys are single and there was a ai robot that looked like let's say elizabeth hurley
yeah that you could bone would you bone it and it and it feels and looked like like
you can't tell it's a robot would you bone? Yeah, probably
Shit, you've been a robot this whole time
Oh my god
Alright, alright
We caught him, dude
I knew I shouldn't have done this podcast
Fuck, it's a setup
Aaron, would you bone?
Yeah, I would.
I probably would.
Do you consider that cheating?
No, this is if I was single.
If you're single.
But if you weren't single, would that be cheating?
Uh, yeah.
I think so.
Wow.
I think it would.
But I got called to do a video the other day.
This guy, he's a YouTuber.
He had like 10 YouTubers trying to win a date with an AI robot.
And she eliminated everybody.
Oh, really?
She didn't pick anyone.
No, she picked somebody in the end.
I didn't see the video.
But she could go through the process of selecting.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Interesting.
And she eliminated my one friend right away.
She was smart.
She made the right choice.
She was instinctive.
She knew what she was doing.
She picked the right dude? Yeah's fire how do i make myself more appealing to ai what's she looking for um i don't know i gotta watch the video it's uh eric i don't know
if you heard of him but oh yeah yeah yeah dude do you think do you think ai yeah do you think
ai will start to have like preferences where it'd be like yeah you're not my type you know no because it's all built
for you did you hear about it did you hear they they tested ai for something and um
they asked ai make the most amount of money you can in you know two weeks so ai starts doing stuff
to make money and they're making money and then it got to
something where they had to do the kapshka and it needed human uh it needed someone to type in how
many bicycles you see or how many motorcycles you see ai went and hired a task rabbit whoa to fill
in the kapshka so it'll like lie and so the task task rabbit was like, what is this for?
And the AI lied.
And it was like, yeah, I'm blind.
I can't.
That's scary.
Because it just wants to survive.
Yeah.
Or to complete the task.
To complete the task.
Does it have an idea what lying even is?
I mean, yeah, if it's programmed that way guys i'm interrupting this podcast to let you know once again that we are on tour get your tickets right now chadjt.com
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go deep check it out all right let's get back to the show because i wonder what like do animals lie
i don't think so oh you know what the well they know when they're
they know when they're being bad.
Right.
They'll be mischievous.
Yeah.
And like chameleons will blend in with their environment to survive.
That's kind of being disingenuous. Chameleons are the biggest liars.
Yeah.
That's very disingenuous.
But we don't blame them.
That's why I don't hang with them.
Yeah, dude.
You got a Hawaii gecko comes up to you like, fuck off, dude.
Because they don't want to get eaten so
we accept it yeah that's survival but isn't that so do do you think humans lie to survive sure
that makes me want to be easier on liars like if someone lies to me i'm like oh you just think you
need to do that to survive well what about like a drug addict like if your friend's a drug addict
who lies you're like hey he's on drugs he wants to he wants to just get his next fix that is the toughest part about addiction is that it makes you i tried to be an
honest addict and at a certain point it stops working you're like no i'm gonna have to lie a
little bit to really get this what were you addicted to uh webcam pornography and you had
to lie about it at a certain point i was very honest about it up to a point. And then my family was going to disown me.
And then they were like, did you watch any?
And I was like, no.
But I did.
But much less than I had.
So I felt like since I was improving, it was okay.
Those little steps are important.
You're doing it less.
How'd you kick it?
I just stopped.
Yeah.
It was tough on the brain.
My brain missed it deeply. deeply yeah it was a huge
hit huge hit it quit and smoking was like that i'm on the vape and i'm like i got a path that i
i'm believing in that could help me get off of it yeah where like i go to zin's and then i do like
a patch or something like that or the gum or did you just go cold turkey no i still chew the gum
but that's okay right don't isn't that frame now as a nootropic
i don't know if that gum is okay or not there's a book that i just saw advertised on instagram
and all these celebrities like paul rudd is promoting it but he's not getting paid for it
i'll find it for you but it supposedly works for smoking and it works for smoking vape
and like any kind of nigger at gum. A book? Yeah. Or some guy.
I can't remember.
Oh, is it The Car?
James Car?
Something like that.
Paul Rudd is promoting it.
Yeah, there's the smoke.
How do you quit?
I have the book on my Audible.
I mean, there's the quick and easy method, too.
Oh, that's what I'm talking about.
That one works really good, supposedly, for a lot of people.
Dude, I was going to tell you.
You know Sager?
The guy who does that news show crystal and saga
he stopped drinking not because he had a problem because his hangovers were too brutal
yeah you knew that no oh yeah that's a that's a reason to stop yeah yeah that's and you get to a
certain age i don't know how old you are but you get to a certain age and fuck drinking i'm 35
okay you're at that age yeah
right yeah i'm old i mean that that that's when the hangovers are bad i feel old i've been feeling
old lately i feel like taking care of yourself i do okay i do i i work out i eat pretty healthy
i only smoke weed on saturdays right on i smoked on sunday this week though and uh, back to the web porn. Yeah. What are you really telling us? He smoked every day.
I'm baked, but I'm good.
Yeah.
I smoked twice last week, but, um, what do you do when you smoke?
Just chill.
I can actually, I don't really have a, uh, you know, some people are like, Hey, if I'm
going to smoke weed, I gotta be like at home and I want to put on a good movie.
I'm pretty fluid. Like I could get high and then someone could call me and be like, hey, if I'm going to smoke weed, I got to be like at home and I want to put on a good movie. Yeah. I'm pretty fluid.
Like I could get high and then someone could call me and be like, hey, do you want to play
basketball?
And someone else could call and be like, hey, you need to go to work.
And I'd be like, I could do either of those things.
You can work.
I used to go to work.
I can't work.
Very stoned.
Yeah.
But I gained a reputation after.
I thought I was getting away with it.
And then two of my coworkers were like, what are you going to do?
Go outside and hit your weed vape pen.
And I was like, they're onto me.
I was like, it's up. I was like like i'm the guy i'm that guy i uh yeah i have that too oh i haven't really drank much since i drink at strider's bachelor party
but the hangover i just remembered he's our guy um But that is one thing, too, is, like, I'll think about, like,
our agent wanted to, like, drink this Friday.
Yeah.
And then I was like, yeah.
And then I was like, oh, I have a show in San Diego Saturday.
Yeah.
So I wanted to get drunk before that.
That's real, though.
Well, it's just, like, there's, like, too many life things where it's, like,
I feel like the hangover, it's, like i if i have things two days down the line like i don't
even want to yeah you can do that though you can just you can just get rid of it it's fine yeah
and you can still go and you can just have a soda water yeah i just haven't been doing it i don't
like that i don't like that when people put that on you i don't like when people are like you're
not drinking oh yeah what the fuck i'm an alcoholic so you have to drink yeah i don't like that you know i because you should be able
to like have a good time that's the thing yeah it's like why do we don't all have to be at the
same level right uh yeah i try even when i was like drinking a lot i try not if someone's sober
i'm like that's a good thing yeah but then i still feel like there's like a quiet like
encouragement that comes from me being drunk in front of them but that's up to them it is tough but yeah i don't like when people like
you gotta drink i'm drunk i'm like it's a weird energy get away from completely weird yeah it's
some open mics there's like jeff carousels he's a maniac guys are fucking sober you pussies this is an open mic oh yeah yeah
people get drunk at the open mic oh yeah oh really i mean actually nowadays it's kind of like it's
this new slotted system so it's not really when they used to be at bars and stuff people would
get hammered uh-huh but how are the open mics it's a weird it's weird now like i i i go here and there yeah i feel like
after covid you know i don't kind of leading up to covid but it's changed so much than from when
we were like really in the open mic scene so now it's like this like slotted system where you like
pay five bucks and you have to stay for an hour and watch everyone right which i think is good
to an extent because you can do like more spots you ever seen you ever seen anybody like really good down there yeah yeah it's inspiring
yeah i'll i'll go to some mics and i'll be like oh fuck that guy's funny it'll be like motivating
where yeah it is like all people are coming up they're funny yeah uh yeah so i do yes i saw i
was at i went to a mic three days ago i saw saw this guy. I was like, this guy's fucking hilarious. Is he good?
Yeah.
I wish I remembered his name.
Was he young?
Or is he old?
Yeah, probably like late 20s.
Yeah.
Do you ever feel when you go to him, though, you're like, I don't know if I'm getting what
I need out of this.
Totally.
Yeah.
Maybe they didn't like it, but maybe they weren't listening.
Totally.
Well, and what they laugh at versus like what regular people laugh at like at open mics it's like
the trauma olympics where it's like someone's like you know i saw my mom shoot my dog to death
with a 12 gauge and everyone's like that's a fucking great joke dude i'm like but then you
say that in front of like people are just trying to have fun on a Friday night what the fuck are you talking about
it is funny when you go from mics to like
the laugh factory
and you're like this audience
like those kinds of jokes do not
they're like what the fuck
I love when you're like you're at the open mic
and you're like you're really working on something
and it goes okay and then a homeless
person goes after you
and they're just ranting.
And you're the same.
You're the same.
We are the same.
We're at the same place.
Well, when I started them,
I loved meeting all those people.
I was like,
these are my people.
And me and that homeless guy
would go to Urban Outfitters afterwards
and look at sunglasses.
And then after a couple years,
I don't know,
I was like,
that was fun,
but I don't know if
we're gonna build a life together it's funny when the homeless person is better than you
sometimes they know who they are yeah they're not afraid they take the shopping cart on stage
this guy's killing yeah they need a ramp i remember i took some of my college friends
open mics like when i was a couple years into it we're in like van nuys at like liquid zoo yeah the guy comes up after me
i've been molested he's like my buddy's like i'm like what do you think he's like yeah it's cool
man yeah it's a lot of catharsis yeah good for that guy to own it yeah probably went to private
school did you so you were a ucb guy right i took it a little bit in new york uh
yeah i think i think matt walsh was my teacher for a little bit oh amazing yeah yeah he's supposed
to come on the pod in a couple weeks is he yeah he started a podcast doing a covering veep oh
like a rewatch oh those podcasts are so good yeah rewatch stuff that's great he has my favorite like
sketch video ever.
The ass pennies one.
I would implore anyone to watch it.
I think it's him and Ian Roberts.
It's so goddamn funny.
He was,
I made a movie in like 10 years ago and,
and he was in it and he was so good.
It was your movie.
Yeah.
He played like a Hollywood star and,
uh,
and he was great.
He was just like,
he did it for free.
And it was,
he was so, Did you direct it?
Yeah.
How hard is that to direct and act at the same time?
It wasn't hard because I didn't really try to direct it.
You went like Cassavetes style? You were like, just let the cameras go and we'll find it as we go?
Yeah, I think that is very hard, what you're saying.
I didn't put a lot of effort in it.
I just talked to the DP
and I was like,
yeah, set up the cameras
and put it here.
And he was like,
I'm going to put it here
and I'm going to put it here.
And I'm like,
eh, sounds good.
I got to worry about acting.
Yeah.
Yeah.
So to answer your question,
I don't think I did a good job at it.
I made two movies.
And the first one was shot on weekends.
And it was one camera.
I don't even think we had mics.
And then the second one, there was a budget, and both times, I was like, I got to worry about trying to be funny.
Yeah, and I think a lot of times, it normally goes the other way, right? When someone directs themselves, their acting performance suffers a little bit.
Has anyone ever directed themselves in a best acting performance i don't
think so ah that's a great question i don't think so is bradley cooper nominated i don't even know
if he was not because it felt like lady gaga was more the star of that movie a little bit like he
seemed more fixated on her performance and f like an argo he didn't i don't think he won he won best picture best picture
not even nominated he wasn't nominated people people are tough on ben affleck when it comes
to the acting they never give him he was great in the air i saw air yeah he was great i liked
matt damon's monologue oh yeah so good so good too
I called my friend
after that
and I was like
you have to see
Matt Damon's monologue
it was
just so good
just the way
when he talked about
how you know
you're gonna
people are gonna
tear you down
people are gonna
it was so fucking cool
it was beautiful
he should win something
for that
yeah
absolutely
that movie was
that's like a crowd pleaser
just straight down the middle.
Good actors, good story.
And not much to it. It all takes place in an
office place.
It's regular guys. Just trying to do their job.
Who's the bad guy? There's not even really a bad guy.
It just sucks a little bit.
Do you think that guy really
knew Michael Jordan was going to be
who he was?
Or do you think that was embellished for the movie?
Probably embellished. Probably embellished, yeah.
Probably had a feeling.
How could you know? I thought it was really cool in the movie
when he was like, they showed Michael Jordan
in the NCAA championships
and they slowed the film down
and he was like, why would Dean Smith
give a sophomore the ball
in that clutch moment?
Freshman, I think. was he a freshman he was a
freshman right and i think they had james worthy on that team like it was yes yes yes yes james
worthy was like two years older than yeah it's a loaded squad yeah and why yeah why would they
give a freshman the ball and he was like because he knows he knows he's the fucking man there's a
quote bobby knight has like one of my favorite quotes from that he's coaching the u.s team when
it was like amateurs and he's talking about michael jordan and this is before michael jordan was pro and at the end he goes on physical ability on
competition and on like skill he's the best player i've ever seen yeah so like i think like the
certain people could see it the people who like are plugged in that way but i mean he went third
in the draft like most people were like he's just a good, a pretty good scorer. Sam Perkins went before him. Sam Perkins and Hakeem.
Oh, Hakeem Olajuwon.
I think Hakeem went before him.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Who was great.
Who was great.
That wasn't a bad pick.
Hakeem's amazing.
Yeah, that was when I used to watch basketball.
Yeah.
Yeah, but I don't know it now.
Is that your sport that you played the most?
I played in high school.
What position?
The bench.
Nice.
Well, you need guys there, too.
You do.
Someone's got to hold it down.
Yeah.
I played a little bit. I would go in, and I was not allowed to. You do. Someone's got to hold it down. I played a little bit.
I would go in, and I was not allowed to shoot the ball.
That's what I remember.
A lot of pressure.
Just rebound.
Who even wants that?
Who even wants that?
Yeah, I don't need it.
You always wish you were better at sports.
Were you a good morale guy?
Mm-hmm.
Yep.
I was just thrilled to be on the team, really.
Yeah, I was thinking, dude, I was thinking, because people are obsessed with height, you know?
Guys are always worried they're too short.
And I think that's because our sports,
you've got to be big to be good at them,
like football and basketball.
We don't have a sport in America like soccer
where if you're short, it doesn't really matter.
It's about different skills.
So if we made being a jockey cool.
You've got to be really tiny.
Yeah.
Then the hottest guys would be like munchkins.
Short kings.
4'7".
Like I'm probably too jacked.
No, you couldn't be a jockey.
They'd judge me.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
They'd be like, hey, get out of here.
You're going to break the horse.
Get out of here, Andre the Giant.
The only thing I remember about high school basketball
is I'd put on muscle
to become a jockey.
Dude, you...
I'd get up to like 180.
If you're watching the race,
just all he's doing
is just some jackdug.
Just some jackdug.
Yeah, and then the person
in the class would be the big guy.
And then a big buff guy
would come in and be like,
no, I can ride.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Not me, but like a big...
That's actually a funny movie.
That's what I was thinking
about writing it. And I think at the end, all the horses me, but like a big buff. That's actually a funny movie. That's what I was thinking about writing it.
And I think at the end, all the horses crash, and then the big buff guy's the only one who
can carry his horse across the finish line.
Will Ferrell as a jockey.
Mm-hmm.
He's doing something.
He has a new movie.
Oh, he's doing a golf movie, right?
Oh, that'll be good.
Yeah.
Yeah.
He's maybe the funniest guy ever.
Uh-huh.
So this very, I gotta ask ask who are your favorite comedians
ever oh what a great question um chapelle um bill murray howard stern oh dude oh steve carell
street corral yeah because the office is like you know you, you know, you like things and then things become like a part of you?
The Office is like a part of me, man.
It's like, I watched it with my kids.
I watched it.
And just those little performances that he does, those confessionals.
They're so funny.
It's watching acting like that.
Yeah.
Like those performances.
That's like my favorite because that gets you most excited about acting.
Yeah.
You're like, man, if you could play a character like that, it'd be so much fun.
What did I just see Steve Carell in?
I watched him in something.
I can't remember.
Did he just do something?
He was in Beautiful Boy five years ago.
He hasn't done anything since?
The Morning Show?
No.
I can't remember what it was
um
you ever see The Foxcatcher
yeah dude
I like that director
Bennett Miller
Bennett Miller is great
yeah
he does cool stuff
he's got a crazy story
he was doing nothing
for a long time
he was living in
Catherine Keener's
guest house
right
and he did Moneyball
someone brought him
the script
yes
and then he just didn't do
anything for a long time yeah he's very picky yeah but i liked foxcatcher the intensity of it was
great those are my favorite things about people it's like those when i hear people's stories like
that and when they're like i like people that aren't doing everything you know like uh or like
i love john mulaney's story like i didn't really know john
mulaney and then i heard he went to rehab and then i went and like i was like this guy went to rehab
i'm like yeah see what he's about and i was like this guy's incredible yeah he's amazing but it's
just interesting that it took that for me to go find him out you know dude sometimes i gotta die
can i say a thought i had while watching a special?
I was watching and I was like, man, I want to be an addict.
It made me remember when I used to do drugs.
Yeah. And I'd be like, oh, yeah, that was funny when you go to your drug dealer's house.
Yeah, yeah.
Or the desperation.
What was your drug of choice?
I mean, I didn't do a lot of coke, but I really liked it.
I was always more of an Adderall guy.
Would you party on coke, or would you go home and just like...
No, no, no.
I wouldn't have a lot.
I'd have like one, two lines.
Just a little bump.
Yeah, and I used to think that was just great.
But I had friends that would kill an eight ball and stuff,
and I never did that.
That was scary.
With that, I'd stay away from it.
Well, it's hard when I get hammered
I
I feel that pull
yeah
but then I'm like
so
cause I just can't
handle the
the come down
yeah
so
I'm just like
I just gotta keep going
it's bad for me
cause I'm like
yeah
it's like
if I start
I'm gonna be up
till 5am
uh huh
and then you see
the light coming in.
Oof.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Worst feeling in the world.
I never had Adderall around.
Like, I've never taken Adderall.
It's weird with Adderall, because I've never used it the way it's prescribed.
Right.
I've used it only to feel like 10 feet tall and bulletproof.
I've never used it to be like, oh, I need to focus today.
It never actually helped me focus.
When I was supposed to write a paper, I'd take Adderall
and then I would just do a million other things,
but they were so fun.
But I never could use it super constructively.
I know some people can,
but it doesn't do that for me.
Are you a pastry guy? Do you like pastries?
How'd you know?
I don't know.
I fucking love pastries.
I would fucking love pastries.
Really?
You ever have Entenmann's?
No, what are those?
Oh, you never had, I think it's an East Coast thing.
I've heard of these.
Entenmann's is like this, I don't know, it's like a box pastry you buy at the store.
Oh, yeah.
It's like raspberry in the middle and then white drip frosting on it.
Oh.
Like a pastry with raspberry and then.
I've seen them, I think. You like sc scones i'm not a big scone guy i'm more i like a i like an almond
croissant oh yeah it's got the almond batter in the middle oh yeah i like that i had a bread pudding
the other day from the alcove that was tremendous is that a pastry that's not a pastry fuck sorry
i cussed a lot this episode.
I like a rice pudding, though, or a coconut pudding.
Oh, yeah.
I like a carrot cake.
Chia pudding?
Oh, chia pudding's great.
Is that good for you?
I assume.
You get an Erewhon.
It's an Erewhon.
It's got to be good for you.
It's a little milky.
I mean, any kind of pastry is tough.
I like mousse.
Mousse is the best.
I love chocolate mousse.
I love white chocolate mousse. White chocolate is the best. I love chocolate mousse. I love white chocolate mousse.
Oh.
White chocolate's great.
A refined man.
What about a white chocolate Kit Kat?
Dude, yeah.
White chocolate Kit Kat?
Cookies and cream?
Cookies and cream.
You guys mix up your Kit Kat?
You guys go different things on the Kit Kat besides the straight Kit Kat?
Oh, yeah.
I'm not loyal.
I don't know if you've seen what's going on with candy these days, but go to CVS.
It is the candy renaissance.
It sounds perverted.
They're taking gummy bears and combining them with Kit Kats.
They're taking Oreos and making popcorn with it.
It's unreal what they're doing.
Who's that serving?
Is that for us or for the younger generation?
I don't know.
I've been feasting on it.
I mean, just combining great shit. The candy industry candy industry is going at the mashup yeah yeah or
like i can i love like uh like sweet tart ropes have you tried those oh dude unreal nerd ropes
nerd ropes unreal you know i think too when you were a kid it was up to us to mash it up
you'd be with your friends you'd be like i gotta i gotta
re-season a kit kat and a banana yeah jam them and see what happens and now the company is company's
doing it for you yeah these people grew up and now they're in the r&d department what do you guys
like at a movie what do you eat at a movie yeah i've been known to ask the people there what's good
i'll do one of those what do they say the bunch of crunch they they look
they look totally confused they'll just be like what's good what i remember my brother
had his 70s i get the popcorn and the twizzlers and shut the fuck up
what i like i what do you recommend you know what i get i get the uh my favorite thing to get
is the uh the ice cream that's in the little, what is it?
Bon Bons.
It's like the Bon Bons, but it's a specific kind.
Yeah, I know what you mean.
It's like a brand of candy that's, it's a mashup.
Like dips or something?
I do the dips, yeah.
I forget exactly.
I get a big cherry Coke.
Ah.
Big popcorn.
Dude, at the theater I went to last week, she was like, do you want me to layer the
butter?
I was like, yeah.
It's intense.
When they layer it, your hand afterwards.
Yeah.
But that's the thing.
It's like, if you butter it yourself, it's like, you just get the first layer.
No, it doesn't really get all throughout.
Yeah.
So, I got layered butter.
And then candy.
I got to go sour bite, sour crawlers uh-huh sour gummy worms sour
gummy worms yeah i remember when i had braces and i used to get the milk duds and you just know
you're in for an entire you're gonna for all two hours of mission impossible two you're gonna be
dude you with braces sounds hilarious dude it was brutal man it was about five years
fucked up my gums
yeah i'm supposed to go to the dentist today i can't it's like my fourth time Dude, it was brutal, man. It was about five years. I fucked up my gums.
Yeah, I'm supposed to go to the dentist today.
I canceled my four-time canceling on the dentist.
Why?
You got to go, man. I like canceling.
I'm going, I'm going.
You got to go.
If it doesn't feel like the right day, I'm like, I'm not doing that to myself.
Yeah.
Were you got problems with your teeth?
Yeah, my gums are bad.
They recede at the canines.
And the doctor told me i really never
had a shock because my braces brought them forward in my mouth and so they didn't leave
enough gum there yeah and then you know in 20 years it'll be a new problem from orthodontistry
that they weren't looking out your teeth look good though yeah don't stare at me like that
they're white oh thank you i'm getting white and that's why i'm going back in i'm getting
cleaned and white it hurts to whiten your teeth you know i've done it before where you put the strips on there no no when they do it professionally it doesn't bother
me too much no i'm okay with it really yeah she did veneers i might solves everything look at
these yeah you got beautiful teeth people sometimes people are like my teeth don't match my face
are your teeth fake these are veneers yeah what happened did you skateboard no my mom was just like gifted
them to me when i was like 15 oh she's like i think because i was i didn't wear my retainer
and she's like fuck it you're just getting veneers oh i didn't know what they were and i don't know
what a veneer is is it is it pop out at night no no no so so basically they shaved my teeth down
to they're like little nubs,
and then they put these caps on.
Oh, and they capped them over.
I've had a cap too, because I get it.
So they just do it with all of them.
They cap them over.
Yeah, it's just capped.
They look great.
Oh, thanks.
Yeah, so you don't have to worry about whitening cavities.
Oh.
Do you ride dirt bikes and stuff?
Yeah.
You do?
No. Oh, fuck. fuck do you i used to i was an xr70 cr80 kid no you weren't i was but the power band on the cr80 was a bit too much for me where was this
out like fontana irwindale i've been known to go to ocatia wells and make the make the dirt spray you know it sounds so fun dude it's fun man you surf though right yeah
it's dangerous yeah because you because not because of you necessarily but other people
like you come around a bank you could be some dude who's a 30 rack in just bombing on his atv
and then are you like done with that now that you're 35 no i'm feeling the hankering coming
back i was gonna get like a husker van a street bike, and my family jumped in and said,
you are the worst person to get that.
I'm notoriously a bad driver, so.
You can't get a bike.
No, no, no.
Probably not.
Probably not.
And now that you're going to be a dad.
Yeah, that would be a bad move.
Is it tough for you to put those things away?
It wasn't for a while.
For a while, I was like, that's dumb.
I'm done with that.
And then you get older and you're like,
I'm feeling a little bit slow. I need to I was like, that's dumb. I'm done with that. And then you get older and you're like, I'm feeling a little bit
slow. I need to kick up
my adrenaline a little bit. I love that
line in Air. He's like, why are you skateboarding?
I'm having a midlife crisis.
The way he delivered that.
Oh yeah, yeah, yeah. It's so good.
When you're surfing, are you like,
is there any party that wants to chase
the bigger wave?
Like, do you have dreams of cho-poo?
No, for me, it's all about the tan.
That's what's up.
Yeah.
You got a nice complexion.
I eat sea moss gel.
What's that?
Come again?
I eat sea moss gel.
Oh, sea moss gel.
Yeah, I started eating it.
Is that it?
I started eating it like three weeks ago
wow and then i was out somewhere in harry jowsey i saw him he goes mate your skin looks amazing
and i was like what a good guy i was like really and he was like he's like yeah he's like your
skin looks really good and i was like oh shit my fiance's been making me eat this sea moss gel
how do you eat that um was at first it's really tough, but now I just take it.
It's just a spoonful, and then you put it on your screen at night.
How does it taste?
It's awful.
Yeah.
And it tastes like farts.
Oh, farts?
Yeah.
It smells really bad.
You must feel tough, though, after you eat a bunch of farts.
Yeah.
I feel really cool.
Eating farts.
You know, you just train yourself to like...
I've been really into that lately trying
to train myself to do stuff you know like go hike every day go lift weights go it's never been more
a part of our lives than now like my social media is just dudes yelling at me being like
what shitty shit did you do today did you freeze to death in the shower did you run a hundred miles
have you tried ice baths i do i do them with i do cold showers and
i've done he's got an ice bath oh yeah it broke so i'm but i put up a post me like i need new ones
so someone reached out so i think yeah i've done it with him and it does feel remarkable when you
get out your skin feels so taut and nice and you you get such an energy rush. What about your brain? How does your brain feel? Better?
It feels...
Clear?
Yeah, probably a little clearer.
Yeah.
And more just intensely ready for whatever's next.
Uh-huh.
It makes you very game.
You're very game.
I did it.
My record was eight minutes.
Wow.
And personal record.
I felt alive.
I didn't feel
like any more
like
clear headed
or focused
I'm not sure
you feel good
it's gotta be different
for everybody
like I kinda believe
like
all these different things
like
not one thing's gonna work
for everybody
but there is probably
and we're all from
different places
like
like ancestry wise
and so that probably
affects your diet
and what kind of
training routine
works for you
but
I definitely believe it and it's definitely good for muscle recovery I mean every sports team like ancestry wise. And so that probably affects your diet and what kind of training routine works for you. But I,
I definitely believe it.
And it's definitely good for muscle recovery.
I mean,
every sports team does it.
Yeah,
that's true.
What do you feel like when you come out of the bath?
I was just thinking about that.
Um,
I think I do feel like a boosted mood,
you know,
if I'm feeling sluggish,
especially I'm then I'm ready to go yeah but i do
it every day uh when you know you know in my in my peak i was probably doing it probably like
five days a week yeah um but i think i was doing it too much i was doing it i was getting myself
sick that was hilarious that was really fun yeah
you get the flu dude i would give myself the flu no yeah we talked on the phone i'm like what are
you doing you're like i'm in bed it was like 40 degrees out you did an ice bath and you're like
coming off a cold and then you call me you're like i'm in bed i got like nine sheets wrapped
around me dude yeah i fucked myself up that was good the best time the best time it's brutal at
the time but the best is if you have a
flight, like early morning flight, hop in that ice bath.
Then you're at the airport just ready to rock.
And you got to feel so much more badass than everybody else at the airport.
Oh, yeah.
Because they're all slugging.
We're all like, oh, man.
With their pillows.
Yeah.
Like, nice pillow.
You're like, dude, I did an Iron Man this morning.
Now I'm just catching a quick flight to Phoenix.
What about sauna? You do that? I want to. I do the steam room. You're like, dude, I did an Ironman this morning. Now I'm just catching a quick flight to Phoenix. What about sauna?
You do that?
I want to.
I do the steam room.
You do the steam at Equinox ever?
I never did it there.
I did Hollywood Boxing Gym.
I used to do the sauna a little bit.
I like that one.
That one doesn't even feel that hard.
Like, you're kind of relaxed in there.
The tough part is just like, sometimes I get bored.
You got to stay for like 10 or 15.
Yeah.
And then I get to about 10 minutes, and then I can't take it anymore. I get bored, but... You got to stay for like 10 or 15. Yeah. And then it gets...
I just stay...
I get to about 10 minutes
and then I can't take it anymore.
I get out.
I think that's...
A little bit's a lot.
Yeah.
I think it all helps.
Yeah.
I don't want to be too hard on myself
about all this stuff.
It feels extra competitive right now.
Like every...
That's like what dudes...
Like dudes used to be fat
and it was like, okay.
You know?
Because we had jobs.
But now ladies have jobs too. So we had to find a new way to like compete and now it's like uh i let go i let go all
that you're not doing it to like be like the top optimizer no no because i know i know i'm not oh
that's nice you know like i know i'll never be uh i'm not there to i'm not there to be in a boxing match or to win. It's literally like personal goal, personal like, oh, like.
I perceive a level of competition in it, though, when I see people posting about it.
Maybe I'm projecting, but I do think it's there.
You think so?
Yeah, I think it's people kind of like.
Look at me?
A little bit.
Not even like in a.
Well, I feel weird posting.
I lost a lot of weight last year and someone was like, you should post some photos.
Like, you know, like, you know.
You do look great.
Thanks, thanks.
You got like a six pack.
I did, and it's in and out.
But like, I do feel weird about it.
Like, it's like,
I post my body and my six pack or whatever.
For what?
I did post, like, when I posted,
I made like a transformation video.
You gotta post once at least.
Yeah, yeah, yeah. But then I feel weird about it. My fiance would be like, you should post..., a transformation video. You've got to post once at least. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
But then I feel weird about it.
My fiance would be like, you should post.
We took some pictures.
We were in the Bahamas last week.
She's like, you should post a photo of your shirt off.
You look good.
And I'm like, eh.
It's also, there's, like, a comedy thing, too, which is, like.
Yeah, we were raised not to.
Yeah.
Will Ferrell, like, posted six-pack?
No.
Right, right, right.
He just wouldn't.
I think think too.
I,
I was super into the optimizing stuff like Wim Hof,
ice baths,
meditation,
all that shit.
Yeah.
And then I got to a point in like the last year where I was just like,
I would work myself up so much about doing all of that.
Yeah.
That it was adding more stress to my life than just like and now it's you know i'm
i'm i'm just like i'll do i'll do stuff here and there i'll work out yeah i don't really do the
breathing or the meditation anymore i'm like i'm like it's just so much work i was working out so
hard i like i i couldn't i couldn't do anything else yeah i'd come home from hot yoga and i'm
like i can't work today yeah i i did i did hot yoga yesterday and it's like it's an hour and a half so i just drained myself of all nutrients you know it's
just all sweat out i did a set i was like i can't even speak right now i can't go to hot yoga yeah
this is so not relatable to anyone that doesn't do hot yoga i can't fucking everyone's doing
everyone's doing hot yoga it's great it hot yoga. It's great. It is great though, right? It's mandatory now.
Do you do it?
I haven't done it in a while.
Dude,
you sent me to that
Boda yoga place
or Hannah did one time.
Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.
I almost died
and it was brutal
but I felt amazing afterwards
but I was like,
for the last half of the class,
I was just laying on the mat
like begging for reprieve.
I have a good story.
You guys will like this story.
So I've been,
my friend was like,
you gotta come to hot yoga.
So I started going
and I was loving it and then we were we were hiking runyon before so then and
going straight to hot yoga which is a great combo yeah and so then my friend calls me and he's like
yo dude he's like the teacher called and said that a couple people were complaining about your smell. Yours? In the yoga class. And I was like, no, no, no.
And he was like dying laughing, of course.
And she was like, and I was so mortified.
Like so fine.
I haven't been back.
Did they ID what the smell was?
I don't know.
Someone was complaining and I stopped.
You got some funk?
But you know what?
Spin it. Go ahead. Bro bro i have a friend who smells yeah like when i
walk into his room i'm like what the funk is going on in here women love his bedroom it's
pheromonally it doesn't work for me yeah but it's intoxicating to some so like yeah one man's fart
is another man's roses like you could be delicious to the right class
well that's my fiancee said she's like you don't smell yeah she gets it because yeah and i was like
well you can't smell it that's so embarrassing dude if you want to fix your smell what you got
to do is wake up at 3 30 in the morning yeah cover your body in branches and leaves and light
yourself on fire let me write this down everyone's doing it
every all the top ceos saw it on instagram yeah they're burning themselves that's the next thing
you light yourself on fire they're gonna come up with suits that you wear light yourself on fire
just absorb the heat for 30 minutes i torch every morning at 3 30 then i start doing spreadsheets
that's seriously the next thing.
That's really funny. One memory that
haunts me is one time I was really hungover
at SoulCycle when I first moved to LA.
You know the rows are really
close to each other. And the
back row was like
they're right behind you.
I was really hungover. Towards the end of the class
I let out like a
nasty fart.
And the lady left early right behind me wow yeah that's assault brother dude it is that's assault i think about it to this day i'm
like arrested for that i know dude it's just like she left early it was so gnarly though so gross
and it was and it was like hungover kind of that way yeah ah dude right in your face
but that's all hard
you can't let anything
disrupt your workout
you gotta finish strong
yeah right
she's not tough
yeah I was pushing her
mentally
I'm like can you
stick with it
I noticed like
instructors in LA
they're always pissed off
yoga instructors
it's always funny to me
yeah
have you noticed that
well
like they're supposed
to be very like like, namaste.
Oh, yeah, yeah.
I know what you're talking about.
There's, like, an undercurrent of, like, pissiness.
Yeah.
Yeah.
I'll trust any of those people.
Yeah.
Anyone who's like, this is the road to enlightenment.
Yeah.
I'm like...
Oh, yeah, yeah.
I'm like, you're trying to get something.
Uh-huh.
I don't...
Yeah, I don't like guru types.
Uh-huh.
They freak me out.
Well, that's the thing I'm thinking about now too is like it's like you gotta go through all you gotta do extreme
exercise you gotta fucking meditate for like 90 days whereas i think it's just simply you just
make a decision in your mind to be happy uh-huh you know it's it's like i think people just
complicate it with these like rituals
and stuff where it's just like I think it's just really simple
you just train yourself to like
let go of shit
you know what I mean? Yeah some mental regulation
I think that's a huge part I also think baseline you are a very
healthy person like you at your most
unhealthy is like
eggs and toast for breakfast and like a light
workout. No I'm blessed with not
having you know a large amount of trauma that i have to work through but like i think it's uh i think i
think people just human beings just complicated we think about stuff too much yeah no no well
if you think about being happy i was thinking about that lately where i was like i don't even
the easiest way to make myself feel happy is to tell myself i don't want to be happy i'll just go
i don't want to be happy and then all just go, I don't want to be happy.
And then all of a sudden I'm happier.
Yeah.
Because I think if you're trying to be happy all the time,
you'll never feel happy then.
It's kind of like what you were talking about earlier with that singer guy.
It's like, it's actually the reverse of what everyone tells you to do.
Really?
Yeah.
Well, I've always been a little contrarian and annoying, so that makes sense.
What you're supposed to do is say, I want to be happy.
That'll never work.
That'll never work.
You're supposed to not talk that way to yourself.
You're supposed to not be like, I'll never be happy.
No, not I'll never be happy.
I don't want to be happy.
Oh, I don't want to be happy.
And then guess what happens when you kick happy out the house?
Guess who comes knocking at the back door and wants to come back in?
Oh, hey, happiness.
Where'd you come from?
Hey, you can stay if you want to, but I don't need you happiness is like all right i'll stick around yeah okay but if i'm like
trying to be like happy come over happy come over they're like dude leave me alone yeah yeah it's
like when you set standards for your life like if if this happens i'll be happy then then you'll
never because then oh yeah that's kind of like what i was like you set like a goal post for
yourself in your life you're like because i was thinking about that kind of like when I was, like, you set, like, a goalpost for yourself in your life. You're like, because I was thinking about that.
I was like, when I can, like, fucking get a Toyota Supra, then I'll be, like, happy.
You know what I mean?
And you, like, set these things, and then they happen, and then you're like, it's just like that.
Or then the Supra pops a tire or something, or the AC is not working right.
And you're like, you piece of shit.
You were supposed to make me happy.
Yeah, totally.
And now you're letting me down.
Yeah.
You weren't the Supra
I thought you were
yeah
the Supra's like bro
a car
come off a factory line bro
not made for you
I can tell like
from the little I know of you
that none of that stuff
will ever make you happy
yeah brother
Supra
yeah
brother no dude
I mean it just won't
and I'm the same
like no
no Ferrari
no Lamborghini, whatever.
Bring me joy like that.
Because it's exactly what you said.
It's like, oh, fuck.
I got this.
Fuck, the Ferrari is out front.
It's going to get scratched.
Yeah, yeah.
No, you get a jalopy.
It surprises you every day when it turns on.
You're grateful.
Dude, that's a great show.
Yeah.
But maybe there are people out there that get that Supra.
Yeah.
And they're happier happier I don't know
Vin Diesel
yeah
dude Vin man
yeah
Paul gave him the keys
to a Supra
friend of ours
dude I
yeah
oh what was I thinking about
fuck
oh
yeah
sorry I didn't get back
but it's
it's that thing
I was talking about earlier
like oh
you know
five years ago
I was like
oh it'd be a touring comic that'd be sick and now now i think in my head like oh to do theaters then i'll
be happy you know what i mean that's when i had the thing i'm like oh but i'm like touring now
like yes why am i why do i keep moving the goalposts for happiness why can't i just be like
but that's that's tough because you you you still want to grow so you to do that. It's like have ambition, but also appreciation.
It's like a tough thing to do.
It's almost like somebody who's addicted to food.
But I have to eat.
Yeah.
So you have to have those goals.
And to separate is tough.
Can desire and peace dance with each other?
And not in like a rap battle dance where it's about winning,
but like in coordination.
I think so because I think if you have the, oh, it's tough, but I think it's ambition, desire.
Yeah.
That's tough.
Because I think a lot of times you, I don't know.
Because if you work in that direction, but then you don't, I think one thing I tend to do is try to force things too early
instead of allowing them to evolve naturally, if that makes sense.
Yeah.
I mean, that's all of us, though, too.
It's tough.
We're always gripping it a little too tight.
You don't seem like you are, which is nice.
I know you, so I know.
But people don't seem like you are, which is nice. Oh, thanks. I know you, so I know. But people don't know.
Aren't you really lucky, too,
that you kind of have him as like a marker?
Yeah, it's like each other's ballast.
Yeah, like you're out, you're doing the shows,
and you can kind of look at him and be like,
oh, that went well, and now we'll go on to the next one.
Yeah, I guess if you're going alone,
you're like, I think that, yeah, that's a good point. It is easy. if one of us is like a little down on the evening the other one's a little up you're
always kind of like you don't even try i think it's just natural that like you balance you balance
yeah like it's funny it's not like it's like one of us has like a defined role where it's like
i have to be the one who like loves this and i have to be the one who like brings us down here
it's like you just naturally are kind of going back and forth and you walk in.
I'm like,
Oh,
he's like really,
I don't know.
It's not,
it's not,
I'm giving it like a,
like a conscious thing right now,
but it doesn't work like that.
Like I'll just walk in.
I'm like,
Oh,
Chad's super stoked on this.
And I'm like,
all right,
well I'll be a bit more level,
but I don't think that my body just automatically does it.
And it's like,
well,
it's like you're dating almost.
Yeah.
Yeah.
We are dating.
He is my,
I say he's my professional soulmate. Yeah. Which is nice. It's so nice well, it's like you're dating almost. Yeah. Yeah. We are dating. He is my, I'd say he's my professional soulmate.
Yeah.
Which is nice.
It's so nice.
Where'd you guys meet?
We were fucking.
And then,
uh,
we,
we met,
uh,
we have a couple of stories on him.
We say we met at birth.
Yeah.
When he popped out at hug.
Then we met doing a four hose beer bong.
And then we really got to be friends doing standup in LA.
And we were just kind of kindred spirits.
Uh-huh.
It's been great.
We've been partners for seven or eight years now.
Dude, that's crazy.
Do you guys ever fight?
Not bad.
No, it'll be like annoyances will come to light here and there.
Our communication's pretty good.
We don't talk about it unless it's really bugging one of us.
And then when we do, we both, I feel like, I'm getting a little emotional.
We both talk about it to make it better.
Neither one of us is like, oh, I got to hurt this other person.
We're always like, by the end of the conversation, we both, I trust him.
I know he's not trying to do anything bad to me.
He's just telling me how I feel.
It's not like Tom and Shiv.
No, no, no.
It's the opposite.
Succession.
Succession.
Where they're just stabbing each other.
I don't have time to watch Succession.
I want to watch it.
I watched one episode of Succession.
It was the greatest thing I ever saw.
And I never watched it again.
It's good.
It's fucking good.
I watched the first episode of this season.
I'm a little annoyed because they backslide all all the time the characters will get smarter for an episode
and then by the next episode they're dumb again and like at this point it's happened so many times
i'm like in real life people do get marginally more intelligent right none of these characters
they've got like a little more savvy at like how to like hurt each other but none of them have
gotten like uh gotten holistically more
intelligent.
It kind of bugs me because
it almost doesn't feel realistic at this point.
People do slide back
into their ways. That's who they are.
In terms of jealousies,
things like that.
We have our things that always
are going to be trying to
pull us.
Later, Aaron.
I guess he didn't like the podcast.
He didn't want spoilers on Succession.
Dude, I want to ask you, sometimes I was really tired today.
I was tired.
For what?
Nothing.
No, we had some work stuff, but nothing like too crazy.
And it's all work stuff I like.
But when you're going to go on camera and you're tired,
how do you get yourself primed and ready to be entertaining um
well i'm lucky but i most of the stuff i do on camera is like i just shoot it myself
for youtube so i just set it up during times when i know i have energy so i'm good from 11 to 5
but you're not do you ever ever have to do it where you're
dreading it and you're like, but I gotta do the thing?
Yeah, yeah. And what will happen
is you'll get nothing. So there'll be like a
party and we'll be like, hey, we want to
shoot this bit at this party. And I'll be
like, I'm too tired. I'm like, yeah,
but we need this piece for the vlog.
And so it happened the other night.
I went out to a party.
Went to some really cool club,
and I got there, and nothing happened.
And my shooter was like,
what's going on?
And I was like, I got nothing.
I just went home.
So I'm a little lucky that way.
That's comforting, because we've had those days
where when you shoot, you get nothing.
And it can be hard on the soul a little bit,
because you're like, that was shitty on all fronts yeah i i try that i i don't um i never worry about that i never worry about
like a a wasted day of shooting or a wasted couple hours it's just fishing yeah you're just
fishing for the right thing totally but i guess it's different when you're acting. You've got to really perform in that 40 minutes you're shooting with Barry.
Oh, yeah.
Right?
That's like trying to sleep before that.
Just get a good night's sleep.
Yeah.
Fucking go to bed.
I try to go to bed at 1030.
Yeah.
And get out.
What was I going to say?
Yeah, I think the worst for me is when it's like, how do you describe it?
I don't even know what I'm trying to say right now.
Feel it out.
Can I throw energy at you?
Yeah.
I think it's like when you I don't fucking know
take your time
take your time brother
no rush
dude also
check out this video
my eyes moving
while I'm sleeping
is this normal
my girlfriend says
this is like good REM sleep
watch this
watch my eyes move
do you see them moving
oh yeah
that means you're getting
some good Z's
that's what she said she said those are good Z's.
Dude, you're dreaming.
Do you have sleep apnea?
I think I do. Yeah, I have it too.
That's so lame.
Fucking worst. I have it too.
Do you? Yeah.
I tried to make a joke
where I said it's lame that you have it and then
you guys were quiet and then I felt really bad
so I'm walking it back. It was weird that you said it was lame because you said you had it before that. That's why I thought it's lame that you have it and then you guys were quiet and then I felt really bad so I'm walking it back it was weird that you said it was lame because you said you had it but that's
why I thought it was funny and then but then I felt like I actually hurt you and then I felt
really bad because no I have it yeah so I'm I'm saying I'm lame too no you said it was lame and
I was like yeah it's lame and then you have it so I didn't react I thought I said I had it before
you did but then I said it again after I think I mumbled it's lame we'll then you have it, so I didn't react. I thought I said I had it before. You did.
But then I said it again after.
I think I mumbled it.
It's lame.
We'll check the tip.
I agree.
How did you do the test to find out you have it? Yeah, it's the worst.
You got to go sleep there for six hours on your back.
Really?
And then if you try to move, they fucking come over a speaker and they're like, get on your back.
Oh, God.
The worst.
Did you wear the thing?
I don't wear it.
Can you fix it with mouth taping?
I've tried.
Yeah.
That sleep is brutal for me.
I wake up in the morning and I'm like, my head hurts.
With mouth taping?
Yeah, I don't know what's going on.
I'm still trying, but...
They say you're supposed to just breathe in through your nose and out your nose.
Yeah.
When you sleep, right?
Yeah.
Not through your mouth at all.
So I've been trying that.
Yeah.
Cleans everything out.
I think it's okay.
I mean, it could be dying. I don't know. But I think it's been fine. Also, you keep the weight've been trying that. Yeah. Cleans everything up. I think it's okay. I mean, it could be dying.
I don't know.
But I think it's been fine.
Also, you keep the weight off.
That helps.
Nice.
Dude, so should we get into the last part of the pod?
We do a beef babe and legend of the week.
Yes.
Yeah.
Chad, who's your beef of the week?
My beef of the week is not being able to do legs every day.
That's fire.
You know, legs. When you do legs legs it's the best feeling you get juiced
up you get that tea flowing you feel fired up your core is just ready to rock you just want to go home
and bone and then you get sore yeah and i you know i did legs a couple days ago i tried to do them
again today i didn't have it in me. Yeah.
I was like, I can't do legs the way I want to do legs,
and I was pissed off.
Wow.
You want to have that post-squat bliss like every day.
I want it every day, all day, every day.
Dude, you're addicted.
Yeah.
I'm afraid to squat.
I pull my back out.
Sometimes I squat, and I feel it in my nuts,
and I'm like, am I doing something in my nuts?
You know what?
Squatting does get you horny.
Does it?
Yeah, it boosts your T.
It boosts your T, yeah.
For sure.
You get that grundle going.
Do you think if you did a little less legs on your leg day,
you could spread it out over all the days?
That's not how I live, baby.
You're maxing out.
Yeah, I got to max out.
That's huge. That's so tough, dude. When's not how I live, baby. You're maxing out. Yeah, I gotta max out. That's huge.
When's the next leg day? That's so tough, dude.
When's the next leg day?
Tomorrow, if I can do it.
Bro.
Are you walking around
like a little sore today?
Do you have some DOMS?
That's the thing.
I'm not even that sore.
You know, I just feel
kind of light in the legs.
You know that feeling?
I did legs yesterday.
Yeah?
And dude, I did some squats
and it was like
the brain afterwards, bro.
It's the best.
Yeah. Not like head, but your brain, dude. What did some squats and it was like the brain afterwards, bro. It's the best. Yeah.
Not like head, but your brain, dude.
What did it do to your brain?
It felt good.
Yeah?
It's the best feeling I know in the world.
Shit, really?
Doing some heavy squats and the way your brain feels afterwards.
I didn't know this because I don't do that.
Oh, dude.
I run, I hike.
No, no.
But I don't do.
What are you squatting?
How much weight do you put up there?
Not a lot.
I don't squat
much um i'll do like you know we do like 350 375 yeah four bills you're not touching four bills
anymore are you no i am um you go all the way down although i touch the floor ass to grass
that's the grass i do kettlebells um but i've been getting more into it lately
because i used to like do sprints a lot but i just got kind of bored with it but you're dead
lift that's your premier lift are you still hitting quadruple digits yeah like four thousand
pounds yeah yeah what about chest day um chest day is cool but not the same not the same dude i don't want to have a big
chest because that's like breasts to me so i skip chest day every day you do you never do anything
no i have like the most flat chest but everything else is like boldest and strong right i think pecs
are kind of inherently feminine like why am i trying to get my pecs bigger so my baby can suck
along my nipple
like what and honestly like not even to be like hardcore about it but like in terms of functionality
the chest doesn't do much it looks nice though it looks good but like yeah if a car is stuck on top
of me i might need some chest to press it off yeah but i don't walk on freeways so for me it's all
about the back the shoulders the ass yeah i i don't i don't do
like a lot of weight at all i work out with like 35 pounds 40 pounds that's it bro yeah
that's kind of how i am yeah even though i was saying four bills i just want to pop anything
yeah i uh i like to do a lot of reps yeah me too yeah yeah you have to come up with a beef now shit my i have
to come up with a beef yes oh fuck i got anything sorry man you go my beef of the week is trash
do you know how much trash we throw away yeah i didn't know until i moved in with someone and
started monitoring that and taking the trash cans out on sundays bro most weeks we don't even have room yeah in our recycling trash can for all
the boxes we get we live in a box economy that's what's happened to america now it's just boxes
of cardboard we spent half our lives getting boxes slicing boxes folding boxes keeping some boxes in the garage until we
can get rid of the other boxes like what happened we didn't always just have boxes coming to our
houses all the time and i'm done with it i don't want any more trash i don't want any more boxes
but i don't see the alternative this whole world runs on trash now
maybe it's gonna be ai drones they're gonna have it in a claw you know like the claw like that toy
machine yeah it's gonna be in a claw now i hope so so you're upset with the amount of trash you produce. Yeah. I hate the amount of trash I produce.
I just throw stuff away.
It is a lot.
It is scary.
And then it just keeps coming.
And it just keeps coming.
But really, it's a two pronger.
And the prong that really has been getting my spine out of alignment is the cardboard.
Right.
Well, that gets recycled
so you're saying the act of breaking it down is a problem so there's no issue in all the boxes
really like environmentally if you're putting it in the trash you shouldn't if you're putting in
the blue but i just think it's a bubble and it's gonna burst like to me the whole economy runs on
sending people boxes having them send it to recycling and then making more boxes oh yeah like amazon yeah yeah and like is that a good economy the
box economy this is like a very half-baked notion that i'm i wouldn't even say half-baked
i put it at five percent cooked i mean i think i think that yeah i think it could be a problem
down the road.
Look, I've just been telling my girlfriend we need less boxes at the house.
Every time I come home, we got more boxes.
Dude, have you been to my
place lately? You got a lot of boxes?
The whole fucking hallway is just boxes.
Look, really my beef is with women.
Why do they like boxes so much?
What's with all the boxes?
Lots of boxes. I don't i don't
even think we need more stuff it seems like we got everything we need and then every time i come home
there's more boxes no because your your your girlfriend or wife needs to constantly be
improving the house that's that's what they're good at no she does an amazing job i moved in
with her because her home is beautiful and so well manicured and designed
and detailed yeah when does it stop when it when it never ends that's just part of like the biology
yeah and i never really thought about it that way it never ends i i can't believe like how bad i am
at like doing stuff around the house when i get back tonight, when I rush home to see her after this, can't
wait to see her. I know when I get to that front door, there's
going to be two boxes sitting there.
And there was two boxes there this morning and two boxes
this afternoon. Yeah. And it's
all stuff I guess we need, but do we need
it? Well, yeah,
but you have a family coming.
You're going to get a lot of boxes. Oh,
yeah. It's going to be like triple the
boxes. Yeah. It is, that is a is a tough thumb well then we need two recycling cans well you'll have to call the city
and order a second one for 125 and that'll come in a box i know and you'll have to get rid of that
box yeah so we need to get another box for the boxes yeah it that is tough when you look at your trash
and you're like fuck man what are we doing like where's this going yeah what like what how are
we existing okay this is going to be going on for a while now are we not full on trash yet it's
crazy i'm producing enough trash for like i think like a 50 person village yeah and that's just me
it's crazy so what's the whole block doing? Yeah.
I don't know.
I don't have an answer for that one. Where does it go?
I had skin cancer a couple weeks ago.
You did?
Is that your beef?
Yeah.
Yeah.
I don't know.
I felt my, I just felt my scar.
That's why I said that.
I was trying to think of my beef.
What's your beef?
Was that skin cancer?
That's a good one.
Fuck skin cancer.
Dude.
Yeah.
That's scary.
I'm fine.
I'm fine.
Yeah.
Was it from too much sun?
Yeah. I had like a, I had like a thing like right here oh it looks pretty cool and it was like it kind of monastitized
whatever and they would like change was it melanoma it was not melanoma so i went in and they go um
she looks at it and she goes oh yeah that's definitely something and i was like oh fuck
i'm done yeah and then she comes out comes out and she goes, she tests it.
She goes, oh.
She goes, good news.
She's like, it's fine.
She's like, I'm going to cut it out and you'll be good.
And I was like, really?
Yeah.
She's like, yeah, no problem.
I go, oh, well.
And I go, thank God it's not skin cancer.
She goes, no, no, no, no, it is.
Yeah.
She goes, it's skin cancer.
And she's like, skin cancer's good.
Like that.
And I was like, what? So apparently skin cancer is good she's like, skin cancer's good. Like that. And I was like, what?
So apparently skin cancer is good, but a melanoma is bad.
Should they have a different word for it?
Yeah.
That's what I was thinking.
I understand if the cells are somewhat comparable, but obviously they're different enough where
one kills you and one just can get taken out.
Why don't we just call it something else?
Yeah.
I don't know.
So yeah.
Because blemish when it's scarce enough
to keep us out of the sun, I guess.
Because what?
Maybe they're trying to scare you straight.
Because they're like, if they called it a blemish,
you'd go back out into the sun.
You'd be like, yeah, just chop it all out.
Yeah, or maybe they want you to be able
to get sympathy with your friends.
So now I can sit here and tell you guys
that I got skin cancer.
Yeah, you can wear the thing and do the run.
Yeah, do the run.
They do runs.
Did you guys sponsor me yeah
so then i said like yeah we'll cut it out in a month and i didn't really think about it she's
like it'll be no big deal and i was like oh cool no big deal then i went in there and
and they fucking cut they cut you yeah they got deep huh yeah you could see my bone
yeah yeah yeah was that a little scary yeah it was super scary and i also
like i wasn't looking at it but i was just looking at my fiance and so she'd be like it's fine it's
fine and then you know you see her face she's like like that you're like what what what what
she's like it's okay you're you're good you're good yeah and they just numbed you locally yeah
they locally numb you so you don't feel it they did a good job but yeah i'm that's my beef
fucking skin cancer
dude and now and now you're like now you're checking everything you're like oh yeah but
you got to get your moles checked i get checked every year you do yeah yeah you got to check them
i remember the the it was a late is a female yeah she's like do you want me to check your dong
she said dong and i was like like she's like she watched your tv show she was a fan yeah i was like yeah
check it out no i was like yeah i think it's okay but i was like i was like can you get skin cancer
on the dom well you guys with the way you go out and fucking tan your balls yeah yeah you got to
be careful oh fuck right that's a possibility in, yeah, yeah. You got to be careful. Oh, fuck.
Right?
That's a possibility.
Tanning your asshole every day.
You guys got to be super careful.
And not only that, but like your penis is like really sensitive to the sun.
It's never been out before.
So you guys need to be careful when you're tanning your assholes.
Dude.
Oh, shit.
Fuck, dude.
The girl came in.
Oh, dude, that's why I have to go to the dermatologist and be like yeah i'm sorry i got i got spread them for you have you been tanning this area yeah it's like actually yeah it's the tannest
part of my body the woman came into this the first woman came in she numbed she numbed me she was
like 50 years old i was like cool and then she's
like all right well dr so-and-so is gonna come in the girl comes in she looks like she's like
a usc student she's like 22 and i'm freaking out i go i go are you doing it like that yeah she goes
yeah i'm gonna be doing the surgery and then i was like oh fuck she thinks i don't like her because
she's a woman right but i don't like her because she's a woman. Right. But I don't like her because she's so young.
You know what I mean?
I don't care if a woman does that.
A woman, man, that's fine.
Women do a great job.
Just as good as a man.
Whatever.
So then I go, I was freaking out.
I go, you're great.
I go, you're just so young and pretty.
I said that.
And then my fiance said, what are you saying?
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Because you wanted to give her a compliment.
Yes. To make up for maybe having, you wanted to give her a compliment. Yes.
To make up for maybe having.
Maybe being a misogynist.
Right.
Which I wasn't.
Yeah.
I've overdone it like that, too.
Like, I did the same thing.
Yeah.
Where the person was too young.
And I was like, dude, you're beautiful.
You got huge cans.
No, your hands look like they'll be feeling great on my body.
I was like like get in here
it's just that you're a hot piece of ass you're smoking hot piece i do find that now that i have
a fiance or girlfriend like i do find that i won't say that anymore yeah or even if i even
if someone walks by like oh you look great or whatever like i i i save those no i holster a
lot of that i feel weird about saying no me too me too i don't want them to feel like uh it feels
good too when you're being like really like loyal and good on that stuff yeah yeah you feel like a
good man like you're like yeah i'm good yeah her friend was over today and she was like did you see
my instagram post and i was like i was like no no i don't go on Instagram. She's like, oh, she's like, I posted my ass on there.
And she's like, I showed the change in my ass
over the last three weeks or whatever.
And I just turned to my fiance.
I was like, I'm not going to look at that.
I have no interest in that.
You know who else would do that?
Not look?
Clint Eastwood.
Because he doesn't have social media?
I just don't think he's the kind of guy who would...
I don't think he knows what fucking Instagram is.
That's true.
He's like 100.
Have you ever DM Clint Eastwood?
I have.
What do you want?
I'm like, Clint, should I be complimenting these ladies who aren't my girlfriend?
He's like, I've never complimented a woman in my entire life.
And I was like, that's right, Clint.
It's so cool when people don't have Instagram.
Yeah.
I mean, sometimes I dream about it, but it's our job, right?
We've got to be on there.
I guess.
Now it's everybody's job.
It's like 12 billion people on there.
Chad, who's your babe of the week?
Dude, my babe of the week is Ponzu Sauce.
Put that on anything dude the tang is out of this world ponzu sauce i'm gonna put this out there yeah i think all restaurants that serve soy sauce
should replace it with ponzu now if you had ponzu in front of me and you had soy in front of me i
would have a difficult time you won't be able to tell the taste though ponzu in front of me and you had soy in front of me i would have a difficult time
you won't be able to tell the taste though ponzu is a little tangier though you're right it's tang
right yeah and what are you having this with like a chicken or like a sushi like a sushi but yeah
i'll throw it in like a chicken i'll be like that's dang what's your favorite kind of sushi
um i like i mean i'm kind of a sashimi guy salmon sashimi yellowtail
um all that good stuff dude toro toro that's what it is toro sashimi you ever go really high-end
sushi uh i've got sugar fish here and there but i've never been to no like high high high end
no you ever done that like i'm gonna do like glowfish kind of thing yeah you should do it
if you like fish you guys should go and do it where do you go high end uh i don't know there's
places in beverly hills where it's like you know you sit down and they they cook for you wow yeah
that's cool there's a place in culver that was on like chef's table yeah that's like it doesn't
look like much when you look at it you're like oh it's just like an
ordinary hole in the wall but then it's like it's like you can't get alterations to anything they
serve it to you like how they make it and then they're kind of like educating you as you go
interesting and then afterwards you just hit a fat burger king and probably no ponzu no ponzu
you have to bring your own youzu. You guys have ponzu?
It's like going to a French restaurant.
I guess if you put salt on your meal at a French restaurant,
it's very insulting to the chef.
Because you're changing the taste.
Yeah.
Yeah, you don't want to put ketchup on a nice steak or something.
You're insulting the integrity of the meal.
That happens at sushi restaurants in Beverly Hills.
They don't give you soy sauce. Really? Yeah, yeah. I went to one. I can't remember the name of the meal. That happens at sushi restaurants in Beverly Hills. They don't give you soy sauce.
Really?
Yeah, yeah.
I went to one.
I can't remember.
I think it was called Hyde or something like that.
Right.
And no soy sauce.
Wow.
Not allowed.
Can't taste the fish.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Dude, my babe of the week is... My baby of the week is English muffins.
And honey nut Cheerios with banana.
Ooh, damn.
More honey nut Cheerios with banana, though.
Damn.
It's a delicacy that I haven't had since childhood
But it's been in the rotation lately
And it's a great way to start your morning
Big bowl of cereal
Almond milk or regular milk?
Oat
People seem to like oat more than almond
Full fat on oat
Full fat
Not sweetened but full fat
Oh wow you're really going for it
I want to have some fun
I want to set my day off right
yeah you know
I think
if you gave me the taste test
you made me blind
and you're like
do the almond milk
do the oat milk
I think I would pick oat milk
yeah
10 out of 10
I like almond milk in my coffee
okay
yeah
because oat milk
separates in the coffee
oh
you know I've kind of noticed that yeah I don't
like that interesting like that shit yeah and my coffee I'm an oat milk guy but maybe I'll flip it
back to the almond um my baby of the week is chocolate chip cookies uh baked from a bakery
like a like a like not like from like a store but like you go to the bakery, you buy,
and you have one every night.
It seems to be that it's perfect
because it satiates you.
It gives you that feeling
like you had something amazing,
but I don't think it's too many calories.
Did I say chocolate chips?
That's a good one.
Yeah, like a nice big one.
Maybe get one from Erewhon
or Big Sugar.
Bristol Farms has some good ones too.
Bristol Farms has a great cookie.
They do a fat cookie there.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Chad, what's your Legend of the Week?
My Legend of the Week is this YouTube, Mr. Ballin.
You guys know who that is?
I've heard of that.
He tells, like, scary stories.
And I love it.
Yeah.
They're kind of disturbing sometimes, but it's just very entertaining.
I love ghosts ghosts all that shit
what kind of stories does it tell it'll it'll range from like murder stories to like uh like
ghosts kind of stories to like you know uh serial killers or just kind of all it's dark
dark and mysterious oh damn i think it's, yeah. But it's just like entertaining.
Right.
It's just this guy speaking to camera.
And he's like telling you a story.
Really?
Yeah, I've been driving and listening to it.
I'm like, this is great.
Wow.
He's crushing it too.
He gets like a lot of.
He's getting a lot of views.
He's getting the hits.
Yeah.
Good for him.
Damn.
Mr. Ballin.
Mr. Ballin.
Nice.
My legend of the week is conversations with kids.
Talked to a 10 and an 8-year-old this weekend.
Nice.
Electric.
These kids' brains are phenomenal.
Yeah.
I'm asking the 10-year-old, Mateo.
It's my mom's friend's kids.
And I'm like, what do you want to be?
He's like, scientist.
Him and all of his buddies want to be. He wants to be a virologist because he doesn't want there to be another pandemic.
Oh, that's good.
COVID had an impact on these youngins.
Yeah.
And then I was like, you thinking about girls?
He's like, never.
I don't think about girls.
And I go, really?
Never?
He goes, never.
He goes, first, I'm going to focus on work, getting some success, and then I'll worry
about women.
Really?
He's state of the art.
Ten.
And then he got a little kiddish, and he was trying to splash water on me to get me to
come in the pool.
And I was like, hey, that's not the way to incentivize me to get into the pool.
If you were trying to convince me to get in the pool, what would you do?
He said, I'd splash all your clothes.
Whoa.
And I was like, so you're still a child.
In some ways, you have very sophisticated thinking. In other ways, you think force is the solution, negotiation.
But it was fun.
Just fun chatting with young and seeing.
Because they're in touch with things.
He's like, the bad kids pick on the weird kids.
And the bad kids make sure they have a lot of friends
so they have more leverage
over the weird kids
and I was like that's the rest of life brother
but it's good you're clued into that
kids are so smart now
it's unreal
my son has a band
they're all 17
and that's like all they do
they literally record music and they play that's like all they do. Yeah. Like they,
they literally record music and like they play shows,
they put the troubadour and they're just like so much more advanced.
Yeah.
Then like the internet.
Yeah.
Like they just put,
they have a new song coming out every Friday on Spotify.
Like it's fucking unreal.
What kind of band?
Like what's the music?
It's like,
um,
Depeche mode.
No,
like kind of like, kind of like, not the strokes, but like pavement, the music it's like um depeche mode no like kind of like kind of like i want not
the strokes but like pavement the strokes right oh so they've got like pretty do we call that
sophisticated taste really sophisticated do you call that alt rock still or you call it someone
said shoegaze yeah what's shoegaze a little shoegazy yeah i guess that's because you like
look at your shoes yeah yeah but it's just it's just crazy. And I noticed that, too.
Like, my son would say that about high school.
He'd be like, yeah, everyone's just, like, putting on an act.
When he was, like, 14, I was like, oh, yeah.
Yeah, he sees through it.
Yeah.
That must be really comforting, right?
To know that he has that kind of, like, awareness.
Yeah, and he has a good head on his shoulders.
Yeah, that's nice.
Yeah, it's been great.
Yeah, and also, I don't fucking see my kids yeah nice and i want to see them okay and there's no court order saying i can't yeah
they just literally they're literally too busy right right they're living their own lives yeah
that's what's scary and you'll go through that that's kind of my parents did that with us too
like they really let me and my brother kind
of find our way and they were i knew they loved me i knew they were always there it wasn't like a
is that good i never felt like in want uh i think it is good dude i was out yesterday we went to the
farmer's market i was with my fiancee we're having a good time and then i'm like driving down the
street i see my daughter with her friend and i fucking pull a u-turn this is like a chance to
see her did any of you just want to watch and see what she was like like operating without knowing you
were there uh no i don't like to spy like that but um no i i didn't because i want contact with
her i want to be like what's up hey right and then she was like oh we have a huge day planned
she said we're going here we're going here we And I was like, okay. They're smart.
See you later.
Yeah.
They're like little adults.
But it's a little sad too.
And it's also like, I have a son that's like really industrious.
And part of me is like, gee, I wish you were like a fuck up, like at home.
That is nice.
You know?
But he's like, I can't.
I'm writing a ballet and we've got to record the next song.
He's writing a ballet?
Yeah.
Yeah. But for high school. That's yeah it's insane yeah he's he's really good do they go to like uh
one of those like cool la schools where like the curriculum is yeah like instead of math you like
dig a ditch and measure it or something yes yeah one time when i toured the school i walked in
there and i go i go i I go, what's going on?
Is there only three kids learning Japanese?
And I go, is everybody sick today?
Like that.
She goes, oh, no, no.
This is the class.
Wow.
Three kids learning Japanese.
I was like, are you?
It's insane.
We had like 70 kids in our class.
Yeah.
No one learned a thing.
Yeah, it was just survival survival who's your legend of
the week my legend of the week is is my son yeah wyatt wyatt nash he's a fucking legend that's a
great man yeah he's a legend he he wrote this song and they came out with their first song and so i'm
like i'm looking at the lyrics and i was like oh i know I know what this is about. So I went through it and I was like, oh, okay, I'm reading the lyrics.
And I'm like, okay, I get it.
It's him and his friends and he's in the back house and he's drunk,
he's hungover, blah, blah, blah.
I thought I had it all figured out.
And then I called him and I was like, the song's really good.
And I was like, I looked at the lyrics and I'm like, what's it about?
You know, just to see if I was right. And then when he told me it was about i was like oh never mind he was like oh
no it's about the devil and uh the devil um you know is trying to like be a good person but he
can and he gets keeps getting pulled back to the underworld like i was completely off that's a cool
song yeah and so just just like i don't, just watching somebody do their thing at that young of an age.
You're like,
geez.
Yeah.
Yeah.
It's really cool.
That's really,
really fun to watch.
Chat.
What's your quote of the week?
Just the last thing.
My quote of the week.
I go,
gotta go with Darth Vader again.
Have you come to destroy me?
Obi-Wan.
I forget what Obi-Wan says says then you will die damn you like star wars yeah i get i
have my moments where i i'm a big star wars fan all my moments like every year or so i'll get
super into it and i'll watch like star wars fan fiction on youtube it's it's so entertaining
they're like this is what darth Darth Vader was doing on this day,
and this is what it's like in Darth Vader's suit.
And it's like, I don't know.
I just love that.
My algorithm is set to George Lucas right now.
Oh, is it really?
Yeah.
Dude, this is getting George.
You big Star Wars guy?
No, but I think the phone listens.
I think the phone heard me watching the Jurassic Park movie.
It knows.
Everything I talk about it feeds me. Now I'm getting Jurassic me watching the Jurassic Park movie. It knows. Everything I talk about feeds me.
Now I'm getting Jurassic Park and George Lucas.
Nice.
It's crazy.
It's insane.
They got a grip on exactly who we are.
And they can feed our worst impulses at any moment because they know it'll drag us for hours into their little vortex.
One time, a few years ago, I was talking to my friend.
And I was complaining about my algorithm. I was was, like, I was complaining about my algorithm.
I was, like, damn, like, Instagram, man, my homepage is all big tits.
Like, what's Instagram doing?
He was, like, you did that.
Right.
Like, you?
Yeah, like that you were surprised.
You're, like, Instagram keeps sending me big jugs.
Who does it think this is for?
Like, I didn't understand what an algorithm was.
Right, right.
Did you think before then that you weren't
into big boobs like were you surprised to learn you're a big boob guy i know i'm into big boobs
but i just thought i feel like you didn't know and then you saw the boobs and you were like wait
there was like an aha moment we're like ah i i like big boobs no i always knew i was into big
boobs but but i just thought Instagram was just this fucking crazy place
that was just doing big boobs.
And he was like, no, that's just your homepage.
Right, if you were into cats, it would all be cats.
I was like, oh.
My quote of the week is a comment on a scene from The Wire on YouTube.
What hurts so bad is Marlo wanted Prop Joe
to give up the man running security on the Stash Omar hit.
Joe says he's my nephew.
I can't give him up like that.
So to appease Marlo, he introduces him to Vondos.
Only for his nephew to give him up and Marlo to cut him out.
I know everyone watching this knows this already.
It just always hits me so hard.
Wow.
Damn.
The Wire.
The Wire on YouTube is one of the best ways to recap a show that you liked.
Yeah.
Good community on there.
Yeah.
Did you watch it a long time ago?
I just rewatched a lot of it, but I watched it for the first time like 15 years ago.
Right.
About that.
Yeah, 15 years ago.
Holy shit, man.
Damn.
Holy shit.
Sopranos.
I like The Sopranos more.
I think that's the best show ever, but The Wire is amazing in its own ways, too.
But your best show ever, drama?
I think Sopranos for me, too.
Sopranos, yeah, me too.
Also, I really love Mad Men.
It's a beautiful show.
Yeah.
It's beautiful.
The writing's so good.
Damn.
It's probably a little closer.
Mad Men and Sopranos are a little closer to each other than...
Same writer.
Yeah, Matthew Weiner.
Yeah.
Well, he wrote for Sopranos.
Yeah, he's in there a little bit, too.
He plays a newscaster.
He reports on the mob.
I like re-watching and seeing him do that.
John Slattery.
Amazing.
So good.
Coolest guy in the world.
Coolest guy.
The guy that plays Pete.
Yeah, Vincent's catharsiser or something.
Yeah, what happened to him?
I don't know.
I think he's just Pete forever.
He got peated.
Damn, that's a good show.
What's your quote of the week?
Quote of the week.
Let's see.
See, I heard a quote today.
Oh, all...
What is it?
Fuck.
Something like...
I can't think of the word,
but it's, you know, when any,
uh,
fuck,
I gotta think of another quote.
Was it one word?
No,
it was something like,
it was something like this.
It was like,
when you're,
if,
if you're like beholden to somebody,
it all,
it always leads to misery.
That was a quote I read the other day, which I thought was really
interesting. It's true.
But I'm not saying it right.
I really blew it, guys.
Well, we didn't prepare you at all. We can't go out on that.
Let's see. Oh, I read a good quote.
No bad art. I read that the other day,
which I thought was interesting. I've been painting a lot.
Oh, cool. You got a style?
Not yet.
I think I have to do like five i had i've done like four
paintings so far and i realized i was like i gotta do like 5 000 paintings to get somewhere
have you guys ever been to an art museum and seen like an all-white canvas and it's in there
and then that's it or just like a painting that's just like one like yeah rodko yeah yeah his and they're
like it's the depth of the red that makes it powerful i'm like okay yeah i'm always baffled
at art you ever see the price of everything on hbo it's really good it's a doc that explains art
and why and how and why things are worth money and why things aren't it's really good really good doc
check that out i mean i love modern art it's my favorite but some of it doesn't pass the sniff why things are worth money and why things aren't. It's really good. Really good doc.
Check that out.
I mean,
I love modern art.
It's my favorite,
but some of it doesn't pass the sniff test,
but then the stuff that does,
it's like,
cause it's always smart ideas behind it. Like the guy who did just the white canvas,
he really thought that out.
He has a whole philosophy behind it and it's commenting on like industrialism and
like commerce and all this other shit.
But,
but there's just not enough skill there for me.
But then like you get someone like Picasso where it's it's the idea and the skill yep and then you're
like okay this is like changing the way my brain works i i love it do you like banksy i do i love
banks i think he's a genius pretty interesting yeah because to do it in the real world too
to put beauty in like these unlikely places yeah and then to be like commenting on society but to
also have it look cool yeah and then the anonymity portion of it it all combines and i'm like that's do you
remember exit it's like my favorite documentary so you remember that mr brainwash sure i've seen
him around sometimes we went to his he had a show in beverly hills he had a big ass show like he they
took over the radio and tv museum i mean it was like three floors of mr brainwash wow and i and
i was in there and we just went to go see it, to like Snapchat or whatever.
And then he pops out, and he's like, oh, hello.
He's like, I'm Mr. Brainwash.
And he was the nicest guy you'll ever meet.
And he was just like, and I thought it was so interesting in that movie, he was like
the butt of the joke.
He's dumb in the movie, but he might have been playing a part.
Oh.
Well, because the whole movie, you don't know what's real, what's not.
Oh, wait a minute. Wait, wait, wait. You're don't know what's real, what's not. Oh, wait a minute.
Wait, wait, wait.
You're blowing my mind.
So, wait.
He's part of the movie?
I think you can.
You didn't prank him?
I think you can watch that movie and believe it's all an elaborate prank by Banksy on that guy and that it's all been coordinated.
But I kind of think that whole movie was like scripted start to finish and everyone was kind of in on it.
I think that's what's cool about that movie is you can't trust anything you're seeing.
Oh, I never thought of it like it. I think that's what's cool about that movie is you can't trust anything you're seeing. Oh, I never thought of it like that.
I think so.
Because in the movie, Banksy sets out to find somebody who makes terrible art and make them famous.
And so he finds this guy, Mr. Brainwash, who's a real guy who makes pop art.
And like, you know, I like the art.
I think it's cool.
Yeah.
You know, but it's very like, it'll be like Darth Vader taking a piss.
It's very easy.
Yeah.
It's like first thought.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
But some of it.
But it's not that different from the other stuff.
I think that was like the commentary of it.
Is that different than Banksy?
Yeah.
It's not that different than what any of those kind of street artists were doing.
I see.
And that you can easily trick even like the intelligentsia into believing it's good if
enough people say it's good.
It's all just like the power of like consensus.
So I thought that was so interesting that like this guy was the butt of the joke in
the movie, but his art eventually broke through and he had this giant exhibit in Beverly Hills
where he was making so much money and like, you know what I mean?
Yeah.
Well, and now he's like an established figure.
20 years ago.
Yeah.
That's insane.
I love that movie.
I think we actually watched it in the writer's room for our show.
You did?
Because we wanted to prank Disneyland.
Oh, right, right, right.
Because they actually got away with it.
He put a Guantanamo guy who had been like, you know, was like kind of in the detainment
clothes and had his head covered, like, I don't know, like
alluding to waterboarding or something like that.
And they put it like next to the Matterhorn, which is so like interesting.
Banksy did that?
In the movie he does it, but I don't even know if that was, we don't know if it was
Banksy.
We don't know who Banksy is.
Right.
That might've been a guy playing Banksy who talked to Banksy.
There's a picture of Banksy online.
Is there?
Supposedly.
That's so disappointing.
How do you know that's Banksy?
We don't know.
We don't know.
Honestly.
I love talking to you about this shit.
You could be Banksy.
I could.
You could be Banksy.
I'm Banksy.
You could be an AI robot.
What if we waited?
This is like episode 300.
What if we waited till now to reveal that we're Banksy?
Man, you should have used it on the Netflix show if you were.
We're Banksy.
That's what we told them.
We're like, bring back season two.
We'll tell them we're Banksy.
Yeah, we should do that.
Are we going to see season two?
If we do better numbers in Bangladesh.
Yeah.
Do you have any?
Netflix is crazy, huh?
No, it didn't.
They don't give you numbers.
They don't give you anything.
They gave us the numbers. Oh, they did? Yeah. I thought they don't give you numbers They don't give you anything They gave us the numbers
Oh they did
Yeah
I thought they don't give numbers
No they were pretty transparent about it
We just
More people needed to watch it
You get 10 days
And 28 days
Those are your numbers
You get 10 days
Your numbers at 10 days
And your numbers at 28 days
And oh they do
I thought they didn't share that shit
They do
Yeah
But you know
I genuinely think it's a gift
I think we'll come up with
Something different and new And like I think We need to keep evolving like the lingo needs to
change the problems need to change i think it's um it's like uh of course you want them to give
you a second season because it's like yeah great they want more of it but it just forces you to
rethink stuff and to push harder so yeah um i think it'll only make us better for sure that's
the only choice yeah not that I'm desiring it
and then maybe a movie
so we're working
we're working on one right now
like a movie would be fun
yeah
you know
we're working on a bunch
we're trying
yeah
you write every day
um
no
work on something every day
but
yeah
I used to write stand up every day
but
it's tough
it's tough to write movies
and stand up
I found too
with stand up you might come up with ideas if you write every day. It's tough. It's tough to write movies and stand-up. I found, too, with stand-up,
you might come up with ideas if you write every day.
Everyone's different, but for me,
I think it'll hit you and be like,
oh, that's a good idea, and write down.
That's like Eminem writes all the time,
but he never uses anything he writes.
He just writes to keep the muscle working,
but then he goes into the studio and he's like,
ha, ha, ha, ha, ha.
He's just keeping his brain active.
That's cool.
You're like Eminem.
I saw Seinfeld the other day.
He was like, he was just basically saying,
I don't know why a stand-up does anything with stand-up.
Stand-up shouldn't do a podcast.
Stand-up shouldn't write a movie.
I agree with him.
He's right.
He's 100% right.
But he also has like bajillions of dollars.
That's true.
I'm trying to keep this train moving Good point
The moment demands content
I love you Jaddy
He's a good guy
Should we call it?
Thank you so much for coming in
I love talking to you guys
It was a pleasure
Good to see you
Thanks guys. If you need advice, these guys are really nice.
You want to know what to do,
where to go.
When you need someone to guide you,
it's nice to have the girls beside you.
Go free.
Go free Go free Let's go deep
Go, go, go
Go, go, go
Go, go, go
Go, go, go