Going Deep with Chad and JT - EP 310 - Classic Solo Chad and JT
Episode Date: September 27, 2023Today the Stokelords are cruisin' out into deep waters! Another classic solo pod! Chad and JT start the pod with some spanish to help hit the overseas markets. JT gives us an update on being a dad and... Chad dives into why sometimes he feels shame instead of stoke! We get emotional, genuine and rip some classic old school stories! Come see us on Tour!Tickets on http://www.chadandjt.com Call us, leave a 60 sec voicemail with your issue or question: 323-418-2019or write in to chadgoesdeeppodccast(at)gmail.com Check out the reddit for some dank convo: https://www.reddit.com/r/ChadGoesDeep/ Episode Sponsered by:Marine Layer Clothing:  Find your new favorite fits and get 15% off @marinelayer with promo code GODEEP15 at https://www.marinelayer.com/GODEEP15. #marinelayerpod BlueChew: Get your first month FOR FREE just pay the 5$ shipping visithttps://www.bluechew.com and use Code godeep at checkout.
Transcript
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Guys, welcome to the podcast. We got a classic, classic solo episode for you.
Just getting, we get emotional, we get deep, we get philosophical, we get silly,
and it's a blast. So, thank you guys for tuning in.
Also, we are coming to a city near you. We are back on the road.
We got Irvine tomorrow. If you're in the Orange County area,
tickets are going fast. time i looked i mean
they're it's almost sold out so if it's not sold out yet make sure you get on that you get your
tickets so uh you don't miss the show we got we got kevin on the show we got strider on the show
we got joe on the show it's gonna be a heater um then we're also coming to san jose chico
nashville charlotte new york minneapolis bozeman bozeman's almost sold out the second show so make And then we're also coming to San Jose, Chico, Nashville, Charlotte, New York, Minneapolis,
Bozeman.
Bozeman's almost sold out, the second show.
So make sure you get on that.
Detroit, Denver.
Get your tickets at chadandjt.com.
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All right, let's start the show.
What's your theme?
Go deep.
Chatting, chatting.
Oh, yeah.
Oh, yeah.
Let's do the bongo drums on the booty cheeks and let's grill up some paella
because we're in España.
What's up, Stokers of Stoke Nation?
This is Chad Kroger coming in with the Going Deep with Chad JT podcast.
I'm here with my compadre, John Thomas.
What up?
Buenvenido, boom clappers.
Oh, muchacho.
Hombre, ¿qué pasó? Oh, muy bien pasó muy bien estoy bien y tú
más y más y si no más y menos es verdad si la vida de la vida del americano es como más y más es yo piensa que si yo creo que sÃ
porque
queremos tener el mundo
con todo mi corazón yo quiero todo el mundo y toda la gente adentro del mundo.
SÃ, sÃ. Yo quiero todos los objetos del mundo.
Yo quiero el forest, el rainforest, el Amazon.
Para mÃ.
¡Ah, qué fuerte!
SÃ, sÃ. Yo quiero América del Sur.
Pero el Amazon es peligroso, pero tú es más peligroso.
SÃ, yo soy el jefe del Amazon.
El jefe.
Us, man.
Este podcast es en español.
Sorry, guys.
We've been getting a lot of notes from the higher-ups at ATC
telling us we've got to be bigger overseas.
So call it cynical.
We decided to come out the gates in another language.
If you didn't understand that, I hope the vibes were still present.
Yeah, I feel like Spanish is one of those languages.
Maybe not, but I feel like Spanish and Italian,
if you're listening to it, you get the...
You get the flair of it.
Yeah.
Yeah, you get the romance of it.
They're nice to listen to.
Yeah.
At least to our ears.
I wonder if ears from other places here, like, I wonder if like, if there's a country where
like German sounds romantic.
Yeah.
They're like, ein, zwei, vier. And someone's like's like oh my god he's sexy dude dirty talk in german
just it just already sounds like moaning yeah can you imagine if like a little like karate
yeah you know that uh uh like a maybe a rom-com
where it's like he wants to be romantic and he's like trying to win back the love
and he has a stereo above his head and he's like he's like i need to speak in german to win her
over don't die every day i've been thinking about you i miss you to the point of frustration yeah
dude we should talk about this.
We had, I think was our last episode?
No, two episodes ago was Hormozy.
Yeah.
Alex Hormozy.
And like some of the listeners were like, fuck this dude.
Yeah.
Which is cool, but I thought it was uncool.
I liked him.
I thought he was a great guy.
I was super excited to have him on.
And I thought he was a great guy. I was super excited to have him on. And I thought he was a good talker.
People were like, oh, he talks a lot and makes basic points.
I'm like, but there's something to be said about being a clean thinker
and being able to articulate what you're trying to say all the time.
Yeah.
It's not easy.
The art of simplicity.
He gets there.
Yeah.
And look, does he put some foo-foo around it?
Yeah, but it's nice to listen to.
It sounds good. Yeah, and on top of that like a lot of people were resistant like oh no we don't need another one of those like coaches for how to make millions of dollars and stuff i'm
like i don't know i that that bothered me because it's like there are people there are snake oil
salesmen who are just trying to you know know, get you to enroll in their program.
So, you spend money and you make them money and all that kind of shit.
But it's like, you know, to be that resistant to it off the bat, it's like, you know, I would at least entertain.
Give them a shot.
Yeah.
Yeah, it felt a little, I think we want to be open-minded.
It felt a little closed-minded to me.
That if someone's an entrepreneur and that's how they spin it,
that automatically they're like a bad guy.
And I talked to one stoker on the phone because he's a bad dude.
I was like, well, tell me what you know.
And then he said he was unethical, but then it wasn't unethical.
He up-sales people at his photography places.
And then he's like, but that's gross manipulation.
I'm like, I don't know.
It sounds like regular kind of business to me. And then people were upset because he referenced,
he did the classic, like it's always a little bit of a mistake, but he referenced Hitler as like
making a, you know, you could learn from Hitler. People were like, why did he bring up Hitler?
There's a million other examples. I'm like, yeah, but his whole point was, is that it was funny to
me. People were like, he brought up Hitler. He's a bad guy.
But his whole point was you can learn from even bad guys.
Yeah.
So maybe you could learn if you think Hermos is a bad guy, maybe you could even learn from
him.
So his lesson was kind of built into the criticism people were giving him.
Yeah.
And too, I don't, I don't like vilifying successful people.
I think that's a loser's mentality.
Like, because someone's successful doesn't make them a bad person. No, because because someone's successful doesn't make them a bad person.
No, because someone's not successful doesn't make them a bad person either.
Exactly.
You should judge them by, you know, how they sit in front of you and what they're like.
Yeah.
And on top of that, he was like, he was a really sweet guy.
He was very nice.
We hung out afterwards.
Yeah.
He gave us bites of his food.
I know, look, I know like some stuff like that.
It's like, oh, he was nice to you.
So that means he's a good guy.
Like he could, you guys are getting played a little bit
I'm like I get that I look I have my antennas up for that I'm skeptical of
people yeah but he was he seemed nice we spent three hours ago you seem like a
great guy yeah he's busy guy too he gave us he gave us you know hours of his time
he works out it works out he's jacked he's like uh he sent us nice messages nice guy yeah i don't know why i
went there we were having a great time i uh no but that did bother me too because i was really
excited for that podcast and the the initial because i think i received some messages from
my friends shout miller what up miller and they were stoked on it they were stoked on it because
and he hadn't heard of him before and he's like i like i like the way this guy speaks i like the way he thinks
and stuff i was like yeah you know i and but i also understand too if you're for me if i'm listening
to a podcast if there's a podcast i like um let's take shane gillis's for example i like when it's
shane and matt right and when they have a guest i'm always kind of resistant to it. So I see that side.
Because especially if it's someone I don't know, I'm like, man, I just want the banter between them.
I don't want this extra guy in the room.
He's going to throw off the whole thing.
So I understand that.
And you do get bummed when someone you like cosigns something you don't like.
I understand that.
It can be disappointing that way.
Yeah.
But, I mean uh i thought
he's a great guy and uh yeah i i you know he's just jacked and he loves his wife i think it's
cool yeah that's that was a lot of the videos i liked of him was was him and his wife talking
about each other yeah they seem really sweet and like they've really been through it the one about
her saying she'd live under a bridge
with him.
Yeah.
Oh my God.
So romantic.
Yeah.
That's like ride or die.
It's ride or die.
Beautiful.
And I'm going to trust him
until Coffeezilla
comes out with a video
but I don't anticipate that.
Look, I can flip.
That's the thing.
Yeah.
Coffeezilla drills you.
Dude, I mean,
he's gotten so big. I'm sure Coffeezilla has looked into thing. Yeah. Coffee Zilla drills you. Dude, I mean, he's gotten so big, I'm sure Coffee Zilla's looked into him.
Yeah, Coffee Zilla's definitely looked at a couple sheets of paper and been like, not
yet.
I need a little more.
Yeah.
I do love Coffee Zilla, though.
He's great.
Yeah, who's going to Coffee Zilla Coffee Zilla?
That would be huge.
Look, everyone's a target. Dude, yeah. No one's safe. The, who's getting Coffeezilla Coffeezilla? That would be huge. Look, everyone's a target.
Dude, yeah.
No one's safe.
The $10 million podcast studio?
Or his studio, whatever.
That's how much it costs?
I think he just says that.
Oh, that's funny.
What else is going on?
How are the kids?
Good, dude.
They're so cute.
Me and Aaron were talking about them before we started.
We have a night nurse. We have help, so i can't really complain but i still do complain and they're so
cute and like the lights are starting to come on in their brains more like they're two months old
so things are their eyes are getting more like uh cognizant like you can see that they're actually
seeing things like they're like whoa whoa whoa whoa and sometimes they'll look at you and then they'll be
like and now they're smiling they'll do this they'll go yeah and then you're like oh you little
devil you little devil and yeah they're just so cute their necks are strong now so they can
pick their heads up and go
and and uh they have indigestion so every time they're done drinking drinking their formula
milk that's about kind of like just you can see them learning how to process
uh food and it's just um it's. It's just awesome watching them process food
Wow, I was gonna say they I
Had something I had when do they start eating like regular food? Oh, I don't even know a
Year damn that long
So they're gonna be on this roll up. Yeah, it's great. I love burping them. I
Love kiss. They don't like kisses yet. I'll kiss them and they go... Oh I know what I was gonna say. Do they... so when babies are born or for a
while do they just see shapes? Yeah so for like the first couple weeks I don't
think they really see much. Then once they're a couple weeks old they can see
like 12 inches in front of them and it's black and white and it's like kind of
yeah like fuzzy shapes yeah and then uh once
they get to like three months old i think the world kind of comes into focus wow so we're right
around the corner on it do you have you heard the theory that like you know infants babies young
children are more in touch with their past lives oh interesting like have they gave you any
inclination as to be like yeah it's like a world war ii general back leo leo has the sadness of someone who's seen some yeah he'll he'll he'll uh it'll
feel like he's seeing behind right it's crazy yeah i'll look at him like are you okay and he's like
oh yeah sorry man yeah i just somewhere else for a little bit i'm just remembering iwo jima and he's
like you wouldn't understand i'm like i've seen all the movies he's like, you wouldn't understand. I'm like, I've seen all the movies. He's like, it's not like the movies.
It's different when you're in the shit.
I'm like, all right, well, do you want me to get you something to drink?
He's like, yeah, beer.
I'm like, you can't drink beer yet.
You're just a baby.
He's like, don't tell me what the fuck I can drink or I can't drink.
All right?
None of you understand shit.
Spoiled little fucks.
I'm like, whoa, do not talk to your parents like that.
And then he just, he hauls off.
I mean, I heard him when I called you the other day
and he was just going off about just war.
He's like, he's saying you don't get it.
Dude, so I go into,
I go to check on him the other day.
Sorry.
I go to check on him the other day and uh he must have been having a full scale
like flashback because i go in the room and all the lights are spinning i don't even know how he
got him to change and there was like war music going on and he was laying on his twinsie pillow
and he he had his pacifier pointed out like it was like a rifle. And he was just scanning the room for Charlie, he kept saying.
Yeah.
And I was like, Leo, Leo.
He's like, friend or foe?
Friend or foe?
But it's all crying.
So he's like, wah.
Wah.
But I can understand him.
He's a kid.
I can understand him.
And he didn't trust me.
He made me leave the room.
So I just let him.
Look, here's the thing.
You can helicopter parent, but when you're doing that to a baby that has PTSD from being a war hero in past lives,
you don't want to be in a helicopter because they'll throw an RPG at that thing.
Totally.
I don't know if it's accidental or not, but he FaceTimed me from your phone.
And he was kind of just staring at it being a baby but i took so
much in where he's like do you know what it's like to watch your friend die in the mud he's just a
cog in the war machine and you're just parts being thrown out there into the shit and they're not
worth that goddamn thing and you're like what am i fighting for what is this war and i was like whoa i was like dude it's sunday morning
and then he just hung up that's beautifully said that yeah i'm actually kind of just proud of his
eloquence yeah been showing him movies and stuff that's fun like on the weekends we'll just family
time watch movies we've been watching some good stuff a lot of adventurer movies like the right stuff lost city of z i watched that recently it's good
which one lost city of z yeah do you like that one it's good right yeah it's badass i listened
to i listened to this guy uh on rogan talk about the jungle paul seri or something so whatever the
rosalie paul rosalie and so i was like i gotta listen to it i gotta watch the last city of z
it's intense dude the jungle's intense yeah i love that the guy's like a good lib back in the day
though he's like no i think these people are awesome they deserve the same treatment as anyone
else yeah nice dude that's how i'd be if i was back then i'd be that kind of adventurer yeah
very open-minded not xenophobic and just looking to connect and what does he say that they like
had a civilization or that that he goes against...
Yeah, so the Westerners are like,
no, no, no.
England, Rome, we came first.
Some kind of white origin to modern society.
And then he's like, no.
In Bolivia, that's where it all kicked off.
They had the most sophisticated culture in the world.
And all the old white honkies are like,
whoa, blasphemous yeah how dare you you ignoramus you man of fanciful ideas
you're a fool and he's all I am NOT a fool I am brave and courageous and
loving and I'm like you are you are those things what do you think happened
to him and his son they're dust yeah they're dead me I mean well guy was a little, that's the other thing I like about the movie, is
that like he is like a good guy like that, but, you know, there's an arrogance to that
too, where you just feel like you can trust everybody.
You don't know who these people are.
Yeah.
For the most part, most of them are very nice, but there's gonna be a couple people in there
who, just like anywhere else, want to do harm to you.
So do you think they ate him or do you
think he became a god both yeah yeah because i believe in that stuff i do like that this is just
spoiling it like so him and his son die at the end and like he's been a bad dad because he's always
on the road chasing adventure but then his son like gets the bug for it so you feel like it's
this happy ending where they're together exploring and and then they just get murdered by a barbaric tribe.
No judgment.
But it's still almost like a happy ending.
Yeah.
Because they lived.
They were out there doing it.
Right.
I want to do stuff like that.
Do you ever wish that you were living in the jungle,
just amongst nature, just connected?
I don't think I'd want to live there full time.
I don't think I could handle that.
I like my creature comforts.
I like my phone.
I like reading in the bathtub.
I have two gym memberships.
I like cycling between my gyms.
I don't think I'd want to give up on that.
I like doing stand-up.
I don't know what the clubs are like out in the jungle.
I mean, it's outdoors. I mean, dude, we got enough trouble selling tickets in secondary markets. I don't know how we're are like out in the jungle, but... I mean, it's outdoors.
I mean, dude, we got enough trouble selling tickets in secondary markets.
I don't know how we're going to sell in Bolivia.
I mean, it's outdoors shows, too.
Yeah, those are the worst.
The laughter doesn't bounce, yeah.
Yeah, they might be doing daytime gigs.
Yeah.
Yeah, I'm not doing that.
What about you?
You seem like you could swing it.
I think I would like it.
I think being connected to nature would be nice.
I just don't like bugs.
That's one thing.
Dude, I'm like, I don't know if you noticed, but mosquitoes are...
I've been getting chewed up.
Where do they come from all of a sudden?
My legs are...
I read an article.
So apparently because there's so much rain, it's like a combination of all the water from i think last winter all that rain and now the heat
is created like the perfect uh storm for mosquito breeding so they're just everywhere those fuckers
dude i hate mosquitoes but dude i was like going to the jungle and getting hit by like a bullet ant
or something sounds horrific what's a bullet it it's a ant that shoots
bullets into you Second Amendment warrior that's another thing that white
white men think they invented anything they invented guns bum I know these
fucking and these skis did yeah I did I heard in like Bolivia they're trying to
like take the guns away from the ants yeah yeah and then so answer like flying
into Congress and like over my dead wing
yeah you can take it from my cold dead wing yeah ants have wings oh you said ants not mosquitoes
some ants have wings i think there is flying ants yeah i don't even want to but i didn't even mean
i fucked up for sure i don't even want to but it worked out yeah well i mean you know they could
call their legs wings you know i don't know want to. But it worked out. Yeah. Well, I mean, you know, they could call their legs wings, you know, I don't
know their culture. Yeah, it's different everywhere.
That's crazy.
There's some ants at my place right now.
And I was looking at it,
this ant, and I was like, it's kind of cute.
They're not bad looking.
Well, it's like that Mitch Hedberg joke. He
tears legs off. They're just snowmen.
That's really funny.
Tony Baker always had a good
joke about insects that we'd feel worse about killing them if they blinked yeah dude yeah if
they just went like this we'd be like oh wow that's that's us yeah they're just not quite
like human like enough they're just they need a little more a little dressing of anthropomorphism
yeah a little dressing a little littleism little dressing little drop
I have no qualms about splatting a mosquito
though
it's fun killing
you know sometimes like when I'm sensitive
though it's a really good
feeling like if I kill a spider
I'll go full avatar on it
where like I'll this happened a couple weeks ago
I took the magazine I was just like
schwack
and then I like dropped to my knees and I was like I'm sorry for taking your
soul from this earth I understand that you know I had to do this I had to do
this to protect my family I hope that I am karmically in balance and at peace
please move on to the next realm like I'll like speak to it like that yeah
which feels good it's good you gotta do that
i think you gotta you gotta measure you know when it's just cruel and when it's obligation
yeah once they're on the on the premises if it's something that can hurt but mosquitoes don't but
like still they gotta go yeah i mean there's there's a couple of spiders around my place orb weavers. I looked it up
They're not poisonous. So there's one by my garage. I'm like I
Just let it chill. I'm not gonna kill it
interesting because
He's just there. He's existing and
I saw him building his web. I was like good for you dude and he's probably
getting mosquitoes it's very sweet and so I'm like am I just becoming a psycho
hippie or no keep going hey hello hey what's up you want to say hi on camera
have people met you before so Mike Bertolino pleasure runs ATC Chad's
letting a spider live in his backyard because he respects its life and it's
yeah or it's an orb weaver I'm not really a spider killer I'm a spider
capture and that's what we're talking about right now yeah thanks yeah I was
feeling like I'm like am I becoming like too much of a psycho hippie or is it are you afraid of spiders no i'm afraid of nothing is
it is your your girl afraid of spiders she is i explained to her though that this is an orb weaver
so it's not poisonous if the the brown weird looking body it just has a big back yeah yeah
but the brown widows i do kill because those are poisonous they are
yeah i don't really kill any of them my kids are afraid of every single spider you could possibly
find and then i'm the one who has to go out and capture them the only bug that really i will kill
is a cockroach oh yeah yeah and mosquitoes right oh yeah yeah you don't even count that right they
gotta go like a parasite yeah yeah
all right all right nice have you been getting teared up by torn up by big time I got I got
chowder the other day my wife got one of these things it's like a vaporizer that you sit on
the counter and it's just like you can't even smell it but it's it kills all of them I think
it just deters them oh in our room and that seems to be working. Nice. Outside.
It's brutal.
I have to look into that.
Good to know.
All right.
We started off the pod
in Spanish
like you told us to.
Oh, good.
Nice.
Yeah, because we told,
yeah, of course.
Yeah.
Appreciate that.
We're going to be big
and we've been talking
about South America a lot.
Ending the demo.
Exactly.
I think it's going to hit.
Do you post speak Spanish?
I saw your post.
Yeah.
You were doing Spanish. Yeah, we spoke Spanish. He's a little better with it. I think, you know, I am Latin, so I think it's gonna hit yeah I saw your post yeah yeah we spoke he's a
little better with it I think you know I am Latin so I think I got a little more
of the body gesticulation but I think when it comes to diction he's blasting
me I lived in Spain for a bit got it yeah she's from Colombia the whole nine
people even hear what I'm saying maybe we just wanted just wanted to mix it up, bring some energy in.
But thank you.
Yeah, of course.
Well, I just got to the office.
I'm going to go upstairs.
Good having you on.
Have a great pod.
Thank you.
Good to see you guys.
Yeah, you too.
We're doing presidents next on the draft.
Oh!
Oh, yeah.
Oh!
Wow.
Yeah.
Well, we got 46 to choose from, right?
Yeah.
Yeah, it's the race to who gets Trump.
Can you take
a two-term president and vote on the different terms oh you agree oh i don't know
yeah which one which clinton section was better i don't know. Research. Enjoy. Thanks, man. I'll be tuning in. You gonna do that live?
Yeah, for sure. When is that?
Like three weeks. Three weeks?
Yeah, we got a lot in the can.
Alright, I'll be interested.
Maybe next week. Yeah, maybe next week.
Later, brother.
That was nice.
Yeah, man. I mean, I think that's nice. It does feel like
leaving the
spiders alive. That's not feel like leaving the spiders alive.
That's not you being a psycho hippie.
No,
that's just social media driving us to,
to more extreme perspectives on stuff.
Yeah.
I guess I've been,
I've been listening to Swami G Vedanta.
Yeah.
You've been into this.
Yeah.
I was listening to the law of karma,
his lecture.
And he's talking about a guy who
he knew as a child who would crush centipedes for fun and then later as an adult he got his
legs got crushed by a truck and he goes fuck yeah and he goes he goes when what was his best action and i was like oh fuck dude whoa
it makes me regret the uh the duck i shot in the face four years ago
you're gonna get shot in the face bummer i blame my brothers that's wild yeah that's like uh like in high school i'd streak a lot you
know and then uh my baby boy pissed on my face the other day good well you also pissed on someone, too. Yeah, that's true.
I did pee on someone one time.
Barely, barely.
It's a buddy.
Big regret of mine.
But now that it's all been rectified.
Yeah, water under the bridge, piss under the bridge.
Yeah.
I hope.
It's all karma.
It is karma.
Yeah, I wonder about that.
Do I have good karma?
Do I have bad karma?
And is that even something you can control it can it be inherited can you inherit your parents karma uh i don't think so i think i think uh
yeah i don't know like the kennedys have bad karma but also amazing karma. Like, yeah, how do you even measure their karma? Right. When they get to be, like, this significant, fantastical, like, Camelot type thing,
but then they all got to die and fucked up shit has to happen to them.
Yeah.
I mean, I guess I wonder if you can get karma, if you inherit your parents karma maybe you know let's say it's like
logan roy you inherit his karma in a sense yeah i think you do too i think you i think you do
inherit your parents karma because especially if it's like a logan roy situation where those kids
like live off of his wealth then undoubtedly they're inheriting the Karma because they're literally using his karma mm-hmm but uh
yeah I think I think there is something about being stamped by you that's like
what Sam Shepard's buried child's about like the guy's trying to drive away from
his family he looks in the rearview mirror and he's like he's like I saw the
mask of like every person in
my family on my face and they just kept going and going and going and every breath i took marked
them forever like marked me forever as like one of them and i i think that's it i think i think
people try to like break away from their from whatever their family is but it's always gonna
be in you you can't help it it's in you genetically it's in you it be in you. You can't help it. It's in you genetically.
It's in you cosmically.
That's like Place Beyond the Pines is about that too.
These kids go way far away from their families,
but in the end they get collided again,
and the kid ends up being just like his old man.
Yeah.
I like watching the first half of Place Beyond the pines the first two sections are the best yeah and then the third one you're like why why are we how did we even get
here oh brutal those first two are sick though and they're like totally different movies yeah
like the first one's like a bank robber one the second one's like a serpico one and yeah and so
you got b coops and you got goss it's good stuff yeah but then it's like yeah you get into that
with his kids and stuff and they both suck they suck they i i just i i have a really tough time
watching kids who suck in movies you know what i mean yeah shitty kid actors when it's a good kid
actor no it's like dakota fanning and man on fire you're like whoa not not kid actors just bad kids
oh kids who act like shitheads like
like criminal kids yeah yeah yeah yeah because did you like did you like the jonah hill skateboarding
movie no because you said it was like too relatable and you don't like you don't like
pen 15 either because you found that no you're very sensitive to that stuff yeah i i think um
maybe maybe it's some like shame over how i was in high school, even though I wasn't, like, bad.
I was always a nice kid.
I was just, like, I don't know.
I think it's just, like, this where you're like,
oh, I was developing, I wasn't mature,
and I just don't like to look back on it.
It just puts you into that sensitivity.
Yeah. I think probably, too, this, like,
inherent shame
around disappointing your parents oh yeah i think i don't have that you don't have that no no no no
i don't worry about this i worry about that i mean of course i do i've had a couple moments
like i remember i got in trouble in junior high and the principal was like what like uh
how do you think your dad's going to respond
when he hears about this?
And I just broke down crying and I was like,
oh my God, they're going to be so ashamed of me.
But I don't think about it like moment to moment.
I mean, I definitely,
and then the other time when I was like
watching a ton of webcam porn,
I remember my mom was like ashamed of me
and that really hurt.
And that's what got me to get better
was that like she,
you know what it is with my parents,
it's so hard to make them ashamed of you that when you do do it it's pretty brutal but
they have such a high tolerance for that stuff that i don't worry about it but but when i do
when it does happen i know i really fucked up because i'm like i'm like they'll let me basically
do anything and be okay with it i have deep shame yeah you got a lot of shame huh deep do you have
guilt or just shame what's your shame
so like what's a shameful thing you did um like when you did heroin yeah would you you're ashamed
of that yeah interesting um yeah i guess but you didn't keep doing it i don't think it's maybe shame is not the right
word i think it's like uh uh maybe a feeling of judgment on yourself though right yeah um
from my parents i think but they don't not my mom but they don't know right
From my parents, I think.
But they don't know. Not my mom.
But they don't know, right?
No.
That's interesting.
That's like, yeah, like in the book Bleachers, it's about like a psycho football coach.
One guy's in like Vietnam and he's going to die in a river.
And he has the coach's voice in his head.
And he hates the coach because the coach is such a hard ass.
But he says the coach saved his life because he had the coach's voice in his head being like,
survive, don't give up in this river.
So like when you do something bad you
hear you can like feel your dad watching you a little bit. Yeah I think I think
it's fear of maybe it's because I'm the one of the youngest ones and you know I
have siblings who've done well and so it's like this fear of fear of not living up to them have they done
better than you though yeah I guess it's all subjective even on TV a bunch you
get recognized at the airport people take photos with you that's nice you've
been paid quite handsomely for a few things. I know because I was there.
I feel like you've done,
it is tough.
I remember I had an ex
who was a stand-up
and she was like,
my parents think I'm an idiot
and this is stupid that I'm doing this.
I'm like,
she had been on TV.
She'd done TV shows and shit.
And I was like,
and I'm starting to feel that more now.
Now I'm like,
am I an idiot for trying to do this?
But it's easier when other people talk to me about it
because I'm less judgmental of them than I am of myself.
But I'm like, do they know how hard it was
for you to even get to that point?
You know what I mean?
Yeah, I think they do.
I think it's, I think, and my family's been great.
They're all really supportive and sweet.
So, and I'm really
close to my parents too I you know call them a lot I think maybe maybe it's
maybe standards I set for myself sure but it's a good thing it's comparison
it could be competition too which I don't think is a bad thing either yeah i think yeah and i think uh i think maybe
this you know i think i think i feel like my older siblings are smarter than me that's probably a big
thing and so a lot of times i just feel like a dumb ass that's hilarious yeah you just feel dumb
all the time yeah just like like my oldest oldest brother will talk to me about something.
I'll ask him about investments or a contract,
and he'll start speaking in this language.
I'm like, fuck, I'm an idiot.
You know what I mean?
No, I feel that way too.
If my dad starts talking to me about what I fucked up with,
like with some financial stuff, I feel very small.
Yeah.
You know?
And I'll have to, there's a part of me that will be like,
well push back, don't let him bully you.
And then I go, well, you actually don't know
what you're talking about, so you need to just sit in this.
And if you feel small, well guess what,
that's how it is right now.
So just go and see if you can suffer through it.
But I don't think that's fixed.
We're not always gonna be, there's things we're stronger at and then there's things we're weaker at, but we'll catch up on the weaker stuff.
Like, it's a long life. Yeah. No, totally.
That's at least what I tell myself when I'm like, when I'm getting like talked down to on something,
especially when it's the money stuff, I'll be like, I'll feel real small. But then I'll remind myself,
I'll be like, that's just for now. I'm like, you're gonna learn this. You're gonna get the
hang of this. And then one day, you might not be the best at it, but you'll be able to hang
with anybody. And it's just like, I'll just like, kind of pump myself up and be like, feel small
now. Don't worry, your moment's coming. You'll be bigger later. Not even in a way where I'm gonna
like dominate anyone, but just like where I'll like, feel strong in myself.
No, totally. And no, I think it's that. that I mean that's why I like all this philosophy stuff because
it helps to put your mind in the right spot of like of like all these all these
feelings I'm feeling up this shame or guilt or like feeling less than that's
all just my mind. Yeah. It's creating scenarios. It's creating comparisons.
It's putting me in a place where I feel like I'm less than for some perceived reason where
that's all just my mind making up that shit.
And there's no, you know, you know, it's, it's, that's all, it's not real.
Yeah.
Or even, it's not real.
It's all, but I don't even think it's a bad thing your
brain does that i i think it's like there's something weird about how we like identify
more with the negative parts of our brain like if our brain has a negative thought
there's a part of me that's like oh my god like why does my brain feel that way that must be
like that must be all of my brain yeah like. Like people did that with Hormozy where they were like, that was something that people
did with Hormozy where he would, they were like, oh, he's insecure.
Oh, he has low self-esteem.
That's why he's successful.
I was like, of course.
Yeah.
We, a lot of biographies will do that.
Like I'm reading the Elon Musk book.
They'll be like, well, his dad was mean to him and he feels less than, and he never felt
accepted.
And that's why he's so successful.
I'm like, why do we always make it the bad thing is the reason that someone does something
good?
Yeah.
Like, that's in all of us.
We all have that little bad thing.
Yeah.
That's not all of you and maybe that's a good thing that you have a little of it.
I don't think it's bad that your brain is mean to you sometimes, basically.
No, yeah, I think too, like, I think self-awareness is great.
I think it's great to an extent to where, you know, you're not...
When you lack self-awareness, someone who lacks, completely lacks self-awareness and
they're just have no...
It can be the funniest person but it can also be the worst person.
Yeah, you're a very conscientious person.
You think a lot about stuff.
But I do enjoy people who lack self-awareness.
Those are your favorite people.
A good douche.
Yeah, you love them. I know.
Yeah, a good douche is just the best.
I think it's freeing to be around them.
Yeah, because if you want to think about yourself less and they're never thinking about how they're perceived yeah that's pretty
powerful yeah especially with what we do you know we're supposed to not be self-conscious but you
know what's funny like uh uh one of our comedian buddies she's a babysitter for like one of the
biggest comics in the world uh-huh and i'm like what's he like she's like dude he's a total basket case stress cadet like uh so anxious and like guilt and shame
ridden yeah he's the man he's the man but he's uh i don't think he's having a good time with it
we're all especially in this culture we're all striving towards that like material success yeah
sure it's really like that's that's the pinnacle. That's what it is.
But then you hear time and time again all these stories
about people who are just miserable at the top.
And then you're like, well, like, yeah.
And so it's like if you can just, if you can,
I don't think it's, and you know, it's like that whole thing
of like just being happy now.
And people think, well, are you going to lose your drive
or like you're
striving for stuff i'm like i think you can i think you can be both if you find joy and what
you do yeah you got to enjoy just the process of of doing stuff i'm getting there more more than
ever i feel it now probably because i have the kids now and so i feel more like lucky when i
get to go do stuff yeah it's a
yeah it's a it's a gift and then but you know I still get frustrated like if we
put this podcast out and it doesn't crush I'll be in or I don't get positive
comments I'll be mad but then I'll just move on to the next thing yeah yeah
you're always gonna be hooked into the response a little bit but that's okay
yeah it's just the ups and down I'm frustrated and mad and comparing myself
and competitive all the time.
But that's okay.
I think it's only bad to be competitive if you're sure you're going to lose.
They're like, oh, compare and despair.
If you compare yourself to other people, you're just going to feel bad.
I'm like, maybe for a little bit, but what if you're comparing yourself to someone
and then you end up surpassing them?
Then you might feel pretty frigging awesome.
But then you'll just find someone else to compare yourself
and I'm like yeah yeah that's called life that's the process yeah like that's
what Michael Jordan did Tom Brady did I know those guys are miserable but I like
him I listen to the interview Tom Brady he doesn't seem miserable the PBD one or
whatever I've only seen clips from it how was it I thought it was great I love
him he's pretty badass right I'm not friends with the guys on the other team.
He's like, I had to be angry.
See, it's all things that
if you listen to a self-help person, they'd be like,
don't be like that. Don't be angry.
Don't be hateful towards other people. Tom Brady's like,
I was hateful every day of my life.
I'm like, yeah, dude. And then people are like,
oh, well, you know, did it work for him?
He's going through a divorce.
Maybe he doesn't have really good... I'm like, dude, I think he's fulfilled. I him? He's going through a divorce. Like, you know, he doesn't, maybe he doesn't have like really good,
I'm like, dude, I think he's fulfilled.
I know it's not gonna be perfect for anyone.
We're gonna have messy lives,
but I think he's doing all right.
And he's scrappy too.
Like he really, he was, he's never,
he's never like, he was never like a prodigy
when he was young.
He really just, he really earned his spot.
His dad, his own dad was like,
like Tom Brady would be like,
I'm going to be a pro football player.
And his dad was like,
maybe just be happy with what you have.
Like his dad's brain doesn't work
like Tom Brady's does.
Yeah.
And he had the best dad in the world.
His dad was wonderful.
But,
no,
he's maniacally driven.
Yeah.
And no one believed in him.
Yeah.
A couple of people.
He had like a college counselor
who like really was a good guy
and stuff like that.
Dude, speaking of that, father, sons, and sports,
have you been keeping track of this Colorado thing with Deion Sanders?
Only vaguely.
Dude, it's been amazing.
It's a shame that we haven't done a pod in a while,
so I can only talk about it now after the hype train has kind of been derailed.
They got their asses smacked by a really good Oregon team on Saturday.
But, dude, it was a fun couple weeks.
Deion just took over college football just by force of personality.
He annoyed me at first because he would do all these videos of him talking to the team,
and it all felt like, I don't know, braggadocio and self-aggrandizement.
But worth it, bro.
He put Colorado on the map.
Like, their games were doing more views than, like, the best SEC teams.
And everyone wanted to see them lose.
And his son's the quarterback.
And his son's very poised and cool.
And I like him a lot.
And can throw a pretty ball.
And they had just the most exciting game.
All the other coaches, like, it was bringing out the worst in other coaches
because they were kind of jealous and annoyed by Dion that they were, like,
one coach was like, Dion wears cowboy hats and like sunglasses he's like
I take off my hat and sunglasses when I meet people you know I was raised right and then it
was like oh shit he's talking shit to Dion and then they would play each other and there was
like late hits and all the teams were super fired up and it was just the most exciting
like uh must-see tv for a while there hopefully Hopefully it maintains, but now they've lost, so I kind of worry it's going to be like,
it'll be half.
But yeah, they had this game against Colorado State
that just went till like midnight West Coast time,
and it was fucking thrilling.
Just thrilling.
I'm just so grateful to Dion
for bringing all that excitement into my life.
Yeah.
And he seems to really love, dude,
he seems to be very loving.
Like one guy, his wide receiver receiver dropped a big critical pass and when he came to the
sideline Dion's like hey man you know your dad's watching you right his dad's
like in jail he's like you know your dad's in jail right and he wants to
watch you and tell all the other guys in there that his son's balling out you
know that right the kids like uh-huh he goes all right come here gives the kid a
hug yeah he hugged him after a big mistake I think that's what I really like about Dion.
I think he really loves those kids.
I think he's a good guy.
I'll be let down if he's not, but I want to believe he's a good guy.
So you think people were pushing for them to go undefeated, right?
Yeah, they just wanted them to win as long as they could.
And then you just wanted the fantasy to keep going.
But they just don't have, it's really the O line and the D line they
just they're not powerful enough yet to keep up with like the really good teams
Oregon looks like they have like a really good team and and then they're
playing SC this coming Saturday they'll probably get smacked again SC's got a
bunch of killers was Colorado a big contender before this year no they've
had really good teams in the past like in the 90s, I think they won a Natty,
but they had five downs on a drive.
There's some controversy around it.
They had Cordell Stewart back then,
and then when I was young,
they had a really good team with Chris Brown.
Was there running back and forth for 2,000 yards,
and they trucked Oregon and the Rose Bowl,
I think it was.
But every 10 years,
they'll have a really good team,
but not consistently.
Was that before he came out with the song Run It? Chris Brown? Yeah. Whoa. No the running back Chris Brown was K-R-I-S. Different Chris Brown. Oh. Yeah.
Oh damn I was like damn that guy's talented. Chris Brown could maybe do it. He's a good
athlete. He can run and jump. He's talented. But you're a football guy now.
Are you sad about the Jaguars?
That was a tough loss, and I did get some Jags fans reach out to me,
and they're like, this is all your fault.
Really?
Yeah, they're like, too much Jag talk, dude.
You jinxed it.
Wow.
They put it on you, dude? They put it on me, yeah.
So what about the last 20 seasons of them kind of blowing?
They've had two good years. It's all on me, dude. Fuck. Even the Mark 20 seasons of them kind of blowing? They've had like two good years.
It's all on me, dude.
Fuck.
It's all on me.
Even the Mark Brunel team, huh?
Even when I wasn't vocal about it, it's the energy I put on that team.
Dude, the Byron left which years?
Why'd you do it?
I mean, you know what?
As a Jags fan, I got too cocky.
I got too cocky.
I was like, the Texans is a shoo-in.
I thought so, too.
Yeah.
Texans are scrappy, though.
That quarterback's actually pretty good, that rookie. Dude, yeah. And so it was a tough-in. I thought so, too. Texans are scrappy, though. That quarterback's actually pretty good, that rookie.
So it was a tough
loss yesterday. Tough loss.
But I do feel good about them.
As we said on the phone or Zoom or whatever,
they have tons
of potential. So you think they'll
turn it around? I think they'll have...
Yeah. They're going to go
to the Super Bowl. They're going to the Super Bowl? Yeah.
Let's go. You're not losing faith. faith no and these other Jag fans are jumping off yeah they're jumping shit
yeah um so did you watch the whole game no how much were you able to pay attention to
honestly not much because I was just doing a bunch of shit um I watched a play I watched
the second quarter oh you watched the whole quarter.
It was solid, baby.
Yeah, yeah.
I get bored with this sometimes, too.
Yeah, yeah.
Not since I had kids.
I kind of tricked.
I didn't even know I was tricking myself.
When me and Hold Me Close were first dating, she's like, you're not crazy about sports,
are you?
I'm like, I mean, I love them, but I don't have to watch them.
And now, I'll be like, give me one of the kids.
I'll just take a kid, go to the other room for nine hours.
Yeah.
Just watch football, dude.
Was she worried he'd be crazy about sports?
I think she had an ex who would get really bummed out when the Patriots lost.
And I will say Southern California fans are a little different
where we don't have a built-in fandom.
We have the Lakers and the Dodgers,
but it's not as deep as if you're a Chicago or a Boston or Philadelphia
guy.
It's not like when Maurice gets depressed when the Bears lose.
Yeah.
I got to tell you, I feel bad for Maurice.
Dude, I've been picking on him hard about it.
I do a joke now.
I don't even think he knows I'm doing it.
Yeah.
So whenever the Bears are getting waxed, which is every week, they'll be down like, I think
they lost like 35-0.
That's brutal.
I'll call him and act like I don't know. Yeah. And I'll just like, you know, I think they lost like 35-0. That's brutal. I'll call him
and act like I don't know.
Yeah.
And I'll just go,
Joe, what's up, man?
He's like,
why are you calling?
And I'm like,
just to say hi.
But I know he's bummed out.
I go,
why, what's going on?
He's like,
don't fuck with me,
John,
don't fuck with me.
And I go,
are the Bears losing?
He's like,
shut up.
And he just hangs up.
My girlfriend's a Raiders fan,
so I was,
you know, pulling for them, but they look bad too, dude.. And he just hangs up. My girlfriend's a Raiders fan. So I was pulling for them.
But they look bad too, dude.
Dude, I got fired up on Taylor Swift being at the game.
Dude, I was watching that.
I saw that.
That was awesome.
That actually excited me.
I don't know why.
It blew my mind where I was like, because they were watching.
And I thought I heard them say it because I was kind of half paying attention.
And I was like, wait, is T-Swift at the game?
And I didn't know Travis was 33.
I didn't know he was.
I thought he was like a younger guy.
He's a man.
But he's like, is he one of the best tight ends in history?
Yes.
Yeah.
He's definitely top five.
Yeah.
I would go, I would go Gronkowski number one, even though he doesn't have the longevity
of who number, but at his peak, he was the best.
Then I go Tony Gonzalez.
Then I go, dude, it might be, Kelsey can't block that great, but he's the best pass catching
tight end besides those other two guys.
Yeah, he might be three or four.
It's like Gates or him.
Yeah, he's right there.
And then some older guys like Kellen Winslow and stuff.
He's right there.
He's top five all time. her her being there didn't affect
him no he played good which I was really worried about cuz when Jessica Simpson
dated Tony Romo Romo had some bad games and everyone was like fuck Jessica
Simpson yeah the Cowboys fans look she's ruining everything yeah and dude like it
will happen if Kelsey has a bad game it it will look bad. Fortunately, he's not a quarterback, so it doesn't feel like the head part of it is as
fragile, but he played good.
He had a touchdown.
I think he had like 80 yards or something like that.
Yeah.
And dude, I don't know.
I'm happy to see her dating him.
I think he's going to be good for her.
I think it's cool.
He's not some sensitive artist guy.
Yeah.
He's a fucking burly
badass footballer i was not a fan of maddie healy no i didn't think they were good for each other i
like i like his music too but you know him being the edgelord guy and her being you know like the
ceo of pepsi it just didn't seem like a good match she's an all-american good football guy dude just
an all-american and dude he called his shot he was i listened to his podcast sometimes he does
with his brother and and uh he tried to give her his number yeah like on a bracelet bracelet yeah yeah
good for him dude yeah dude guys i'm interrupting this podcast once again to let you know that we
are on the road so get your tickets at chad and gt.com we're coming to sydney near you
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All right, let's get back to the show.
What's up, guys?
Daddy got back early and just drained my lizard
and Aaron, how you
doing over there?
I'm good. Just
telling JT before the show, I'm
sore than I've ever been
in a long time. Were you lifting?
Slip and slide.
Oh, dude.
Were you slip and sliding on some concrete?
No, no. just in the backyard,
showing my daughter and my niece how it's done.
Did she love it?
She's too small to really do anything.
Yeah.
So I would just grab her like a wrestler
and just kind of throw her down the,
like basically bowling with my daughter.
That's awesome.
Throwing her down the lane.
Dude, my girlfriend was like, should we get a slip and slide?
But I don't think we have enough room on the grass.
Yeah, you gotta have some room.
Yeah.
It's gotta be pretty flat.
But you know what?
Thinking about it now, we could just use my neighbor's lawn.
The one who called the city on you?
Yeah.
Oh, dude.
Yeah.
Get his ass.
You're going to call the city on me?
Then I'll slip and slide on you, brother.
Schwing.
You ready?
Yes, sir.
Dude, by the way,
the strike is tentatively over.
Yeah, the strike's over.
I hope we got a good deal.
I hope the writers...
Wait, so it looked like one of our agents said it's over for the writers.
So the actors haven't come to a deal yet?
No.
Because they...
But this, I think, from what I've heard, this will create the framework for the actors' deal.
So it'll be probably faster than now we'll do congrats all
the hard-working people on the the writers side and on the acting side for
a fight in the fight and beat in that room and you know yeah sticking to their
guns are you guys ready for Grey's Anatomy to come back let's go dude next
are you fired up is next summer summer going to blow for movies?
No, next summer is going to be the best because they pushed all the movies from here to there.
So like Dune and like this sexy tennis orgy movie.
Yeah.
It's like a smaller movie, but me and my gal were pumped on it.
That's getting pushed.
A lot of hip stuff got pushed.
Okay.
So no, next summer is going to be the fucking balls, dude.
Oh, sweet.
I mean, if you're into Dune, I think Dune sucks.
But I'm excited to see the second one.
Yeah, I'll see the second one.
Did you like it, Aaron?
It was all right.
I mean, I felt.
Or did it suck?
No, it didn't suck.
I just fell asleep during it because it's just long.
How could you not, dude, when the frigging Arthur Arthurnakis are coming to kill the Burakai?
Just a bunch of words.
And then in the end, it ends with a fucking bar fight, dude.
Chalamet kills some rando.
Oh, yeah.
Like, who is this guy?
This guy's not even somebody.
I'm like, he's like below a henchman.
He's just some dude who's like on the peripheral.
Like, hey, I'll fight you.
And then they're like, oh, I'm supposed to care about this scrap?
Okay, cool.
I'm like, he's a prince.
He should be killing another prince or princess.
Make it interesting. He will. He another prince or princess. Make it interesting.
He will.
He will.
They're just setting the table.
But guess what?
I like to eat.
It's a long-ass table setting.
Yeah, exactly.
It took forever.
My friends love it.
Swing.
My friends are nerds.
You hear me, Brooks?
I'm just kidding, bro.
I take it back.
What up, Chad and JT and esteemed guests of the pod?
Calling from Boston as a 23-year-old stoker
because I'm currently at a crossroads.
I'm dealing with a young man's complex,
deciding whether I want to pour my heart and soul into my career
and take over the world
or just get by and fuck off somewhere beautiful or wild
like Amsterdam or something.
The question I've been asking myself recently
has paralyzed my decision to either,
one, move out of my family home into the city for my job,
stay at home to save up to buy some land,
three, just work to pay off my student loans
and then move somewhere wild.
Some outside perspectives from you guys
would be fucking wicked.
Please keep me anonymous.
Why does he want to be anonymous?
Did he specify his, does he have a job right now uh or he's trying to decide
if there's something that he wants to pour his heart and soul into move out of my family home
into the city for my job so it sounds like he might have one but it's uh he might also just
be cocky where he's like oh i'll have a job if i want one right i think i think he has one dude i
don't know look Look, whoever's going
to give you advice on this is just going to be speaking from their own desires of what they wish
they did. Yeah. Like right now I have a family and I can't leave. So to me, I'm like, Oh, go
somewhere wild. But when I was able to go somewhere wild, I would have told you to stay at home,
buy some land and meet a lady and make a family so just know this whatever decision you make you're gonna always kind of in the back of your
head want the freedom to do the other thing so what i would say is since it's early you can't
buy land and make a family and then go fuck off so while you have the opportunity now
go fuck off because you can always decide not to fuck off mm-hmm I think to
look you look envision yourself 20 years from now if you look back would it will
you be more stoked on yeah you know if 20 years from now if you're like man I'm
really glad I you know went dove headfirst and becoming CEO of Kellogg
that'd be cool or if you're stoked on going to Amsterdam and, you know,
getting fingered in the red light district, whatever you, that's on you,
whatever you prefer.
I would say, dude, there's only so much time for adventure too.
There's only so much time your brain and body can handle it.
So get it while you can, you know, Richard Linklater,
one of my favorite filmmakers, he lived on an oil rigger for like a year that's awesome just read the classics and then he came back and he made these wonderful
films that describe the human experience in a way that is unique to him but he can't do that now he
had to do that then so i would i would go go to amsterdam get a job out there as an arborist
eat bread and then come home and make a family and then you can tell your family about
all that cool shit you did because you don't want to tell your family about all the cool shit you
wish you did did he uh did he work on the oil rig or did you just live on no i think he worked on it
yeah that's cool dude i wish i had done that and before that he played college baseball like the
guy's got some experiences that's cool yeah he's a cool Dude. You'd get so tan on an oil rigger.
Bro, it'd be pretty insane, right?
Yeah.
Maybe too tan.
Offshore.
If you can even imagine that.
Deep blue horizon.
But dude, there is no wrong answer.
You'll make the best of all of it.
Swing.
Okay, here we go.
This is from...
Okay, here we go.
Hey, Chad and JT, I have a question about the B room.
How do I politely decline a second round?
Sometimes after making whoopee, my boyfriend will get hard again and want to go for round two.
What a beast.
But I know it's not a full boner, and the ensuing encounter is bound to end with me awkwardly saying I'm done
after his dick deflates in my cooch.
I've been there a million times.
I don't want to hurt his ego because I know he worked hard to get that second win,
but to be honest, it's more of a breeze.
He's 29, so I don't expect him to have the stamina of a horny teen and i am fine with one round done
well how do i reject his semi yeah well i would definitely wouldn't say it's because he's not
full hard um or you can say that and maybe it'll toughen him up and he's the kind of guy who can
handle it i respect the out of that too i respect the fuck out of that too. I respect the hell out of that.
I got to stop saying the F word because it doesn't work for clips.
I would just tell him you don't want to have sex a second time.
Yeah.
Be very direct.
I'll just be honest.
Be like, you know, babe, one pounding is enough for me.
And you, and, but be very complimentary.
You pounded me well like i'm
worn out my whole body feels light and tingly like you really worked it and um you know another one
is just uh it's not going to work for me so i think you know just just save it up for you don't
want to you don't want to do continuous poundings you you want to save it up and make it special each time you don't want to do it just because you can you want to do it because
your whole body and soul is into it and that's what i felt that first time and now
you know let's watch the conjuring franchise perfectly said dude
i've been watching the conjuringuring franchise. It's good, dude.
Annabelle?
Scary.
What's the deal on that?
Well, they got the Conjurings.
They got Annabelle.
And they got The Nun.
Oh, The Nun.
And The Curse of La Llorona.
But I haven't seen that one yet.
Wow, that's a deep cut.
And The Nun, wouldn't recommend it.
Annabelle, very scary.
Okay.
Well, so they're batting a pretty good average.
Dude, yeah.
Crushing it. Hey chad and jt and
whoever else is there at the moment i'm writing in to just ask how i should deal with this situation
i'm the fringe guy of my friend group what you guys would call the schmole i recently found out
that the guys are all playing games and in a group chat without me i'm just trying to keep up the
stoke with my buddies but man i'd be lying if i said i wasn't hurt i never thought we all we had
a schmole in our group but it just dawned on me that it's me i
love my buds but there's a part of me that doesn't want to be around guys that don't want to be
around me how do you guys think i should handle this should i embrace my role as the schmole
or should i find a new group of buds that enjoy me love you guys and all the positivity you guys
put out there it's a tough one you got two options man one and you're justified in either route one if you're
young enough and you got low enough self-esteem because you're young not in a bad way just because
you're young and you don't know what your worth is yet you'll just make yourself so badass because
it's not a fixed position to be the fringe guy a fringe guy can move into the inner circle
it just takes some determination and you got to suffer you got to suffer the indignity of being on the outside for a while.
But if you keep fighting, you make yourself chill, you make yourself relax, you make yourself fun,
you're going to get in that inner circle.
But maybe there's a part of you that will always feel bad that you had to fight for that from your friends.
So if you feel like that's too big of a cost, you move on.
You get new bros.
Both things are tough, but you can do both.
Yeah, I think that's well said. I don't know if i have really anything to add to that i um
but you know what there's there's another thing you can do make them miss your presence yes not
need them dude yeah if you don't need them i mean mean, I haven't seen Kevin the Schmole in probably two weeks.
I think about him every day.
Yep.
And just him and I just reenacting like a back alley BJ, which is kind of what we do.
No one does it better.
Yeah.
We don't actually do it.
We just reenact it because it's funny.
It is funny.
I would do it.
I'd be serious about it.
I'd act like I was really getting had i mean that's your style oh fuck fuck that feels good god damn that's good
i mean in the back alley like wait this just got weird yeah this is weird i was like no no no no
it just got right um that's tough though man i'm sorry you feel that way. Look, I remember one time I was filling gas at the gas station.
I saw two of my buddies and my brother driving in a car.
They were like, what up?
I lived down the street.
I was like, where was the fucking phone call?
And look, sometimes people just want a break from you.
It's normal.
But it stings, man.
But you'll be all right.
You just got to fortify yourself and be like, look, I'm good either way. I know who I am. I know I belong in the inner circle and maybe I
just got to prove it to these guys a little bit or go find some other guys who will want, who know
that I'm, I'm that guy already. Um, all right, here we go. Last one. Sorry to start this message
off as a bummer, but my girlfriend Taylor, 30 years old, just found out a week ago that she
has a brain tumor. She had surgery to remove the tumor this week and is now on the long road to
recovery. One of our first dates was to one of your standup shows. We've since been again,
and both times she whispered half the jokes to me right before you said them because she's been so
many times. She's that big of a fan. She's a teacher and likes to listen to your podcast on
the way home from work. I think it helps her relax after a stressful day teaching the youths.
I know this isn't your typical thing, but she's got a long road ahead and plans to
listen to the show to keep her spirits up when she can if you can have any advice on how she
can best recover and stay positive i know she would be stoked to hear from you she's from
redondo beach and has been a fan since day one if you guys do respond on the pod please let me
know which episode it is so i can make sure she listens to that one thanks again for in general keeping everyone's spirits up and doing what you guys do her name's taylor taylor taylor we're thinking about you we love you
you got this dude this is the thing about stokers and this is what i've learned from a lot of the
ones we've met they're better than us y' Y'all are sweeter, more open-minded, more kind-hearted, and more durable people than we are. So I'm taking
inspiration from you. I know you'll stay positive, you'll stay light, and you'll stay
with a full heart through all of this. I know there'll be some tough days, but it seems like
the hardest stuff's behind you. And on your long path to recovery, I just hope you have closeness with this kind fella who's looking out for you and cares about you so much
and that you guys have a bunch of beautiful experiences and we're here we're here for you
you can message us we're ready to rock through this with you taylor you've got the full froth
of stoke nation right behind you we're supporting you'll get through this. You're on the road to recovery.
And we're just pulling for you.
We love you.
Just feel that love.
I'm shooting you with a machine gun right now.
Firing me up.
And I'm turning.
These are love bullets.
Da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da.
Da-da-da-da-da-da-da.
You can't see it right now, but they're red.
No, they're pink.
Pink.
Pink, yeah.
Yeah.
They've got pink
tracers on them yeah and then they explode into confetti we're shooting
pink tracer rounds that yet all times and and you sound like you got a great
guy here he's a thoughtful dude you're a good guy dude and what are you up for
it let's all grab a poke bowl dude I'm down sweet fin hey come to our show in irvine too we'll say what up afterwards
that's nice um all right we got to do one more because this one is just as big what up stokers
this is a hot heavy and a long one before i met my girlfriend i had some experiences in the lifestyle
i've been a bull to multiple hot wife couples I've driven through a polar vortex to a large city to have sex with someone I met on reddit
I have experienced as a dominant in BDSM. I've even been to a few glory holes safe to say I've done some things
I love my girlfriend and she's the one for me
She knows most of this about me most of it turns her on she does not know about the glory hole
Experiences we do have a pretty exciting sex life, and I do what I do a lot to keep her satisfied
But I've been craving these experiences for some time we've dabbled in the lifestyle
It's been a year or two since we've had an experience, and it's clear. I want this more than her. That's okay. I
Don't want to rush it, and I want to make sure we do things at her comfort
This guy is just bursting at the seams dude this guy guy is trying real hard to be good and he's
like, no it's okay I can handle it I'm good. No I'm not a prisoner of my desires.
Yeah let's go apple picking again. I love to apple pick. One thing that I miss is
the total relaxation of an expert BJ from a stranger at a glory hole.
Brother man, I think we all know what you're talking about.
Nothing is better than the connection with my girlfriend, but this is different.
I know, clear, honest communication is the way to go.
She's even said she wouldn't judge me if I said something about attraction to gay sex what i'm getting to is asking is there anything i'm missing with trying
to bring this topic up to my girlfriend i want to bring it up but make sure she feels acceptance
security purpose and identity respectfully d dude what a name what an email dude d
uh first off dude the way you describe the tranquility of a
First off, dude, the way you describe the tranquility of an expertly crafted BJ at the Glory Hole, thank you.
Thank you.
This guy's got a big aid on him, you know?
He has a need to obliterate himself through extreme sexual behavior, which I respect.
He's got an engine on him, and it's revving up.
And he's been doing his best
to keep
coloring inside the lines, to keep it on the track,
to not go into the wall doing 100.
But look, dude, the beast inside you is large
and it's only going to get louder. You've got to find
other ways to work it out. I don't know. Do you dig
the bungee?
Take a bungee jump? He got a bungee jump.
He's got to do other things that are kind of extreme.
I think this guy's got a base jump. Base jump that's what i'm saying though but some kind of jump
yeah something exhilarating yeah take take all that excitement and adventure in the sexual area
let's see if it fits somewhere else yeah let's see if that can get some of it out yeah and then maybe
you catch a beach while you're base jumping. Dude, I was thinking that. Whoa!
Somersaulting through the air.
Whoa!
Whoa!
Whoa!
You could try wind jacking, too.
Have you heard of that?
No, what's that?
It's where you skydive with your dink out,
and you let the wind just flap it into fully wrecked.
Whoa!
I mean, dude, you would love that.
But, dude, I don't know, man.
It sounds like you have a great girlfriend.
It sounds like she's super cool.
She's very understanding. And yet, you don't know man. It sounds like you have a great girlfriend. It sounds like she's super cool. She's very understanding and yet you don't want to do
Don't drag her into something that's gonna make her feel bad afterwards. That's never cool or fun And I don't even think dude. I
Think you just got to live with having a little bit of that animal go unfed in you
I know that sounds like a bummer
I think there's ways you can feed it that feel
safe and productive for you and your gal, but
I don't know if this animal needs to eat all the
time. I think it's okay
to have a little bit of stress, a little bit of conflict,
a little bit of unresolved desire there.
I think
too, there's
things you can do. You can
create your own glory hole in your house
and simulate that
experience exactly but it's not gonna have the same rush no because it's probably not just some
you know in the closet trucker on the other side who just somehow has a gift wow that's crazy that's
what it is and he'll never know if that's what that was he could also think maybe that's just
some hot housewife who loves to feel nasty.
But
it's probably more the trucker guy.
It's probably for sure the trucker guy.
But it's that mystery
that you can build it up.
I don't know, dude.
This guy's aware of himself.
He's feeling it in real time and he's
owning it. But just don't make
your girlfriend do anything to you. Don't make her get nar you know and she she might even say yeah
i want to get nar bro come on don't make her get nar talk about it dirty talk about it but don't
don't don't don't drag her into the nar yeah he's like swayze and point break it's like
she doesn't need to rob banks she likes that you rob some banks but she doesn't need to rob banks
i don't mean that to be like you know oh, oh, women can't rob banks, too.
I'm just saying this person doesn't seem like a bank robber.
There's other women are bank robbers.
They belong in jail.
In jail.
Keep them away from society.
Solitary confinement for you, ma'am.
Swing.
What do you think, dude?
This guy's just going to have a fucking boner the rest of his life.
It's tough, dude.
That's your punishment, dude.
That's your karma.
I mean, yeah, when you were reading that description,
I was like, this guy is in constant torture.
Yeah, he was hard when he was talking about that expert BJ.
Man.
Is there a directory for glory holes like how's yeah dude there's like a like an app and it like pops up like little
bubbles you know yeah oh man 30 minutes to van nuys it's four o'clock like pokemon go and they're
like closing soon and then you read the yelp reviews and it's like two and a half stars yeah
someone's like not even expert bjs at this one how do you know if someone's behind there like do you say like hey
there's someone there i'm gonna i'm about to enter and then they're like you know it's like a
trucker trying to play yeah it's me dude the trust you have that someone's not gonna like
just schwack your dong dude i know like what if it's some like you know
Dennis the Menace kind of mischievous not kid but like adult man Dennis the
Menace on the other side is like yeah bag oh the trust the trust you put in a
stranger that must be a hard pop like when you come because you're like you're
like dude this person could like hurt my dong and then instead it's an expert beach what dude oh what dude the anticipation life bro life giving you
gifts when it could hurt you you know it's like a piranha cuddling you to use uh one of chad's
favorite phrases you could get right angled dude if you get right angled in a glory hole then you're
stuck forever yeah it's like when someone's like chasing like the good guy in an action movie and he like shoves a broom handle through like the doors you
know and then they're like oh dude what would you rather have to uh confess to your wife that you
got gonorrhea from a stripper or something or that you got right angled at a glory hole oh dude the
gonorrhea with the stripper, way easier. Yeah.
Yeah.
I mean, there's so much for her to process on the right angle at the glory hole.
But she'd be like, why are you peeing sideways?
And you're like, oh, my dick points west.
It's like having your shoulder pop out and you got to reset it.
Yeah.
It's like your dong's just sort of flapping like that and you got to pop her back in.
It's kind of a sequel to, like, 127 Hours.
Yeah.
I want to go to a urologist and be like, dude, how many right angles have you seen?
Dude.
I know, a guy who looks at the planets.
Yeah.
You're like, well, I've seen Jupiter.
All right, next part.
Chad, what's your beef of the week?
Dude, my beef of the week is the game against the Texans yesterday. I mean, the Jags. Come on. Come on, next part. Chad, what's your beef of the week?
Dude, my beef of the week is the game against the Texans yesterday.
I mean, the Jags.
Come on.
Come on, bros.
Sorry, bro.
It's the Texans.
It's just tough showing.
It's tough.
And I'm sorry to the Jags fans who think that I jinxed them.
I'll read their first names so I can formally apologize.
Let's see.
Kyle and Quentin.
I'm sorry.
But I'm going to continue talking about the Jags as much as I can.
And that's the way it is.
They should have won yesterday.
Amen.
Dude, I got multiple beefs.
Beef Uno.
I'm going to get old man here.
Targeting calls in college football games. So if you like jam your helmet into another guy,
you get thrown out of the game now because they're trying to take out those
like head to head collisions because, you know, concussions and whatnot,
which I'm all for and make the game safer.
But there's a huge hypocrisy in it.
Offensive players will lower their helmet and bring the boom on a defender.
It's total targeting just the other way.
And it never gets called on them.
And there was a specific example two Saturdays ago.
Like, I think it was in the LSU game.
Their safety got thrown out.
I'm like, oh, come on, man.
It was so bang, bang.
Because sometimes the defender will lower his helmet,
but he's going for the body.
And then the offensive player will lower his body
to absorb the hit.
And then you get called for targeting.
And it was like dumb, dumb to me.
And then on offense, I think an LSU player even got a highlight
for lowering his helmet and bringing the boom on a linebacker.
And I was like, he should be thrown out.
Look, I don't think either guy should be thrown out.
I know we've got to make the rule matter, though.
And then if you don't throw him out, there's no stakes.
And then guys will just take the 15 yards.
But I don't know.
I can't help but see some inconsistencies there.
And then my boy Fitzpatrick for the Steelers got called on.
I mean, look, we won the game.
It's no big deal.
But it looked like he let up.
It didn't look like he really brought his hat.
My other beef is with Bill Maher, who I'm a huge fan of.
I know people, like, I love Bill Maher.
I think he's hilarious.
I love his show.
I like that he seems to shoot from the hip.
I like that he's wrong.
I like that he's not afraid to be wrong. He's a great douche. But boy, yeah, to your thing, loving douches. He's like kingpin of that. But dude, he was way too wrong on this thing.
Trying to bring his show back during the strike. Like, what are you doing, dude? And now he looks
like a real bozo because the timing of it, the strike was going to end in a week. Yeah. Like not getting good advice from whoever his people are.
But that's the thing.
He's the kind of person who doesn't care what other people think.
And I know he says he was doing it for the other people on the crew who needed a gig.
But come on, bro.
You can't scab like that's BS.
You've been on the air for like 40 years.
How much more TV time do you need?
I don't think your show is going to get canceled.
Like, I don't know.
I just thought it was super fucking whack. And as someone who's a fan of his i was like a little bit
disappointed like i was like oh come on bill you know i'm rooting for you man but yeah not cool to
scab not not cool i know he's a great douche but that was that was what happens when a great douche
douche is in a direction that doesn't, you know, align with your douche values?
Understand your douche.
Chad, who's your babe of the week?
My babe of the week is Tank Bigsby.
Oh, yeah.
Dude.
Good name.
Dude, fucking.
I think he scored a touchdown yesterday.
Anyways, he's a beast.
Tank Bigsby. You know, I. Your football fandom's yesterday. Anyways, he's a beast. Tank Bigsby.
Your football fandom is insane.
Dude, I know.
I was like, I'm going to do all Jags.
But I've been a fan for three weeks.
So I could bullshit and try to act like I know things about these players.
I don't know anything.
You like his name.
I like his name.
And you like Trevor Lawrence's hair.
Yeah.
Hey, that's enough.
It's a start i'm just being truthful and honest here that's tank bigs me he's but he's my babe that's all i got um i got a couple babes so we haven't done a pod in a while
so i got a couple babes uh first babe a new one that popped into my head what are those pants dude
dude uh do we have these on air yet look at these so i've had these for like
a year and a half i never seen them before i haven't put them on isn't it weird when your
friend wears something new and then you're like it's it's a sensitive it's a gentle thing yeah
you know what i mean but it shocks the system when your bro wears something new you're like
am i okay with this i'm okay with i like them i've had them for like a year and a half i never put them
on until how do you feel i feel great you know that's what matters bro i'm trying to be a little
more more funky you're taking adventures yeah yeah you're going a little schwabby i like being funk
yeah yeah locals only too i love that yeah it's good shit um dude one of my babies of the week
too is it's two bro hugs i had i i was at the
comedy store on thursday i mean this guy he's having a kid we were talking afterwards and he
was like dude did you know like when babies are born they look like the dad i was like yeah
evolution made it that way so dads wouldn't dip on the mom like they'd see the kid and be like
yep that's definitely mine i gotta hang around he's like also dude did you know that why women
moan and i was like no he's like he's like well actually women used to moan in like caveman days because when they were moaning it would bring more guys over and then
more guys would have sex with them and they could get the strongest sperm or the most chance for
procreation and then i was like so if a woman doesn't moan it's because she doesn't want more
dudes to come over and she's really in love with you and then me and him looked at each other like
that's why our chicks don't moan and then we both just hugged i'd never talked to this guy before i mean i'm just hugged and then after we stopped
hugging we were like man that was awesome and i was like dude dude's just ripped dude chad who's
your legend of the week trevor lawrence dude he looks like petroglyphs from troy and uh i see a
lot of potential in him i like you know when i games, they look like good passes.
He's got a cannon.
Dude, yeah.
Yeah.
He's 6'6".
He's tall, dude.
Yeah, long.
6'6", pretty fast, dude.
Man.
6'6", 225 with like, I don't know, probably like 475 speed.
Can you imagine being just a fucking steed like that?
No.
Sometimes I'll stand like where I'm doing dips at the gym.
Yeah.
And like look down on everyone from that vantage point.
I'm like, it doesn't fit me.
It doesn't work.
Yeah.
But I like that they exist.
I like watching Trevor Lawrence move out there.
It's wild.
Dude, I said 4-7-5.
He ran a 4-7-8.
Coming out of high school.
So that's probably, I don't know if that's electric.
Electronic.
Yeah, he's a beast.
electronic yeah he's a beast dude my legend of the week are videos of dads at baseball games catching foul balls or home runs while holding their kids yeah there's like 20 of them that you
can just watch and so his dad he's got his kid and then like he's got his like two-year-old
daughter and then the ball comes flying so oh oh he grabs it and then you'll just see him like
stick the ball in there and go yeah and the crowd just goes ballistic yeah it's the
coolest thing in the world it's a very modern dad thing yeah it's like you know dads now we hold our
kids we're with them all the time but at the same time there's that man party that's like i gotta
catch this ball and when you're able to do both at the same time it's this beautiful marriage to
me of like being sensitive and present but also not losing the part of you that just needs to make sick grabs yeah that's
tight hell yeah and then chat i was gonna mix it up instead of a quote of the week are you ready
for something new oh yeah thank god yeah it's the best haircut you ever got.
Alright, I'll tell you.
So, this happened to me last May.
Pretty recent.
Shout out to Myra.
Is that the same lady?
Yeah.
The one that we used to see in West Hollywood together?
Yeah.
No, no, no.
You saw Myra during COVID. Right. In Pl vista yes she's still she's like how's john he's always stoned
she said that she's no she says he came in stone one time was i baked probably
i think that was the day i got the vaccine and i was just kind of wiped out. Maybe I was baked.
She says it like laughing.
I'm sure she thought it was charming.
So I was like
a lot of times people give me haircuts
and they'll go for like the Bieber.
They'll make the back
short but then the sides long.
And every time I look back at photos, I'm like, that looks horrendous.
It makes me so mad.
But then with her, I'm like, look, let's keep it high and tight.
Keep the flow, but keep it high and tight.
But give me some length back there.
She did it perfectly.
She nailed it.
And then I'd see it in photos.
I'm like, that's exactly what I've been going for for 30 years she
figured it out she cracked the code yeah what about you third grade fantastic
Sam's this guy Dino ended up moving to Seattle he met the right guy and put a
little hydrogen peroxide in my hair to make it to give it some red dude and then
he chemically relaxed it so it was straight and then i did like kind of a zach morris part oh
that's sick and dude i i walked out of there i took my shirt off and i walked up nailie gale road
in jeans with my shirt sticking out of like like a tail out of the back of my jeans and i was just
catnip for freaks dude the fact that i didn't get abducted is the shock of the century i mean i was
just patrolling my sweet little tart ass right up the street and just feeling myself six ways from
every day and it was it was just one of those moments It was one of the best hours of my life. That's tight.
Then I got home and I pet my dog, Taz.
And then I fucking got smashed by my brother in Samadden and it's just the best.
That's tight.
Dude, that was way better than mine.
Really?
Yeah.
Yours was more about the hair though.
That was about the hair, yeah.
Mine was like not my hair.
I looked like I was just, dude, it was just, you know what it was?
The boy bandera.
Hey, are you, NSYNC's coming back.
Are they back?
They're back.
Dude, can I just put this out there?
Yeah.
They look terrible.
They don't look good?
No.
Oh, yeah, they're old as shit now.
They should have got more work done yeah but you know what good for them for being out on that trail especially you chris kirkpatrick well timberlake looks a little sad to be there too
look i'm psyched they're back together but it's a little bit like he's like oh now i'm at the
nostalgia time yeah like we're all running from that we're all running from it shout out to jc chazay jc chazay he's
probably the most talented yeah he can sing dude what's your what's your favorite nsync album
oh good question probably no strings attached i think that's when they really nailed it
that's when they nailed it celebrity's pretty good but i think the first one's really good
i forget yeah tearing up my heart tearing up my heart I want you back
yeah
it's got some bangers on it
it's tearing up my heart
yeah it's all good stuff
um
alright dude
should we call it
yeah
dude
good solo
yeah it's fun
solo dolo
uh
guys
thank you so much for listening
thank you for being stokers
spread the word out there.
And stay fired up.
Yeah, get some tickets to our live shows, dude.
Yeah.
All right, late.
Booty hole.
If you need advice
These guys are really nice
You wanna know
What to do and where to go
When you need someone to guide you
There's much to have for those beside you
Go and see
Go and see
Let's go see Go and see I'm going deep I'm going deep
I'm going deep