Going Deep with Chad and JT - Ep. 69 - Sam Tripoli Joins, Conspiracies, Living Your Truth
Episode Date: May 8, 2019What up dudes! Welcome to episode 69! We are joined by stand up comic, podcast host Sam Tripoli. We dive deep into the world of conspiracies - talkin about the moon, UFO's, what the CIA is u...p to and everything in between. We also have a deep conversaysh about how living your truth equals freedom. Dive in! Check out Sam's podcast "Tin Foil Hat"! Sam's Insta/Twitter/Youtube: @samtripoli
Transcript
Discussion (0)
Alright, I'm gonna get off my phone.
What's your theme?
Going deep.
Chad and JT.
Oh, what's up Stokers of Stoke Nation?
This is Chad Kroger coming in
with the Going Deep with Chad and JT podcast.
We got episode 69. This is a big event.
Whoa!
You didn't tell me it was a big one.
Yeah.
We got my compadre, John Thomas. What up, up dude what up stokers boom clap and we are joined by sam tripoli yeah stand-up
comic who what's your demographic on this podcast i think call high school late high school college
to like early 30s i'd say one in 10 emails is from like a guy with kids.
Yeah.
Senior, I guess. It feels like most of the people are people,
the people who write in are like kids at the end of high school
and they don't know if they should like stay with their girlfriend
when they go to college.
Nope.
Yeah.
Move on.
Move on.
Bang everything that moves.
I'm open-minded to it.
Nope.
I like that.
Well, you know.
Hit it all.
Hit it all.
Hit everything. Good looking, know. Hit it all. Hit it all. Hit everything.
Good looking, short, fat, ugly.
Fuck everything.
That's what I say.
And then when you get bored, you get a little older.
Hello?
Oop, I hit this thing.
God dang it.
Yeah, I've never seen someone handle the mic like that.
Am I ruining your podcast?
No, no.
No, not at all.
Yeah.
Well, do you think some guys aren't meant for that life, though, of hitting it all?
I think you got to do it.
Can you hear me?
Is it going?
Wait.
Aaron?
There we are.
There we go.
Thank you.
Feet on the ground.
Thank you so much, Aaron.
Are we recording right now?
Yeah, we're still recording.
Are we still recording?
Sorry for that technical delay.
Can you edit that out?
No, we have to keep that.
Perfect.
Sam knocked out the audio.
Because he's so horny. Did I or the cia do it i don't know it's out there we're gonna get into it we're gonna get into it we're gonna go deep i think you should date i don't think you
should date until you're ready to just give up chasing stuff around what age you typically think
that is or do you think it's a mindset or 35 35 yeah that's
why and then you hit 40 and you become an invisible man yeah so do bang everything moves till 35
then slow down girls don't marry any guy under 35 it's a giant waste of time they're never going to
be settled down they're going to be a wandering eye women gotta date older men because older men are like
pet rocks you leave them in the corner you come back an hour they're still in the corner you know
what i'm saying yeah but do you have you don't have any boys who like married their high school
sweetheart and it worked out i'm trying to think i know one guy who got married right out of college
and he's still with him he's super happy but marriage in my family has been a fucking train
wreck dude just like yeah like everybody's except for my cousin Frank, everybody else, crash and burn.
Have you been married?
No, but I've been with my girlfriend for like 15 years.
And when did that start?
35?
No, you're-
No, no, no.
I mean, 30.
So, and then, I mean, dude, I wish we would have gotten married.
I could have gotten divorced by now
you know i'm saying i could have like called it a day and every day i google fake my own death i
just i'm figuring out how i can just you feel you feel by mexico no i love her to death but it's
just like her breathing drives me nuts you know what i'm saying it's like you just get to these
little things where you just want to you sleep sleep over there, I'll sleep over here.
I got a dog that just fucking, I pay for everything.
I get no sleep.
The dog sleeps perpendicular.
It's chaos.
They always want to do things together.
I'm a lone wolf.
I got to go off on my own, do my own shit.
Yeah, you've done well at that.
You're very independent.
You've built your own following.
It's cool. Well, I had to because if I didn't, I wouldn't do,
nobody puts me in anything, which I'm not complaining now
because I've created this really wonderful thing,
but I don't get put in anything.
So I got to do all my own shit, which is a blessing
because when shit goes bad for me, I'm so used to it.
I just keep moving forward.
Yeah.
The people who get everything early, they get really,
they get like soft, you know,
and it's just, they expect everything to work out.
And then at one point, the train goes off the track and they don't know how to deal with it.
That's why you don't want to get anything early.
Look at the guys who hit late and how great their careers are.
Marin, Burr.
Rogan, to a certain extent.
To a certain extent.
Like who he is now.
Joey Diaz.
They have great careers.
Yeah.
Because it took so long for them to get it.
Yeah.
They worked out all the kinks.
They did all the stupid shit.
Now they're kicking ass.
Yeah.
And you know what else?
Another thing I noticed.
And their audience trusts them because all their stuff is like self-generated.
Well, they're real.
Yeah, exactly.
They're real and raw.
And that's what I would tell everybody.
Go hard in the paint.
This political correct thing just is not working.
But what if you just are a politically correct person well then you'll do really well like if you look
at like uh but i'm saying whoever you are be be that you gotta be that guy but you're the heart
in the your heart in the paint oh yeah dude always dude i remember actually when i first started
doing comedy you were one of the first guys i saw at the store and i love the uh no dude i loved it
uh because i love that sort of like don't give a fuck attitude you know what i mean I saw at the store. And I love the... I'm sorry. No, dude, I loved it.
Because I love that sort of like don't give a fuck attitude.
You know what I mean?
Dude.
Like the first thing I saw you do
was like you were like acting out
Kim Kardashian sucking a dick.
Do you remember that?
Yeah, dude.
It was so funny.
Oh, because she's sleeping.
I love that.
Oh, yeah, dude.
It's like that porno
made a billion dollar empire.
Yeah.
Dude, I love New York. Do you watch that? I used to watch... Is it back? No, no. It's like that porno made a billion-dollar empire. Yeah. Dude, I love New York.
Do you watch that?
I used to watch.
Is it back?
No, no.
I'm talking about 2005.
Oh, yeah, back.
The Rock of Love and all that shit.
Oh, I loved it.
Oh, I loved it.
The best.
I love it.
Just brain rot.
Yeah.
It's just fun.
Yeah.
Just, you know, I mean, like, here's my whole opinion.
Reality television and minimalism was created to get rid of talent.
Yeah.
Like, I just shot the see W show, right?
And the director who's my friend is like, dude, you're overacting.
I'm like, I'm an over actor.
Yeah.
That's how I do it.
Yeah.
Well, go small.
No, that's not who I am.
Yeah.
You want to rock?
Let's rock.
Yeah.
Minimalism.
I'm like, you watch these really pretty people do minimalism because they can't act.
You're just like, how hot am i so like reality television is about getting rid of writers and actors and minimalism
and acting is getting rid of acting yeah so you can just put mannequins out there so the beauty
is to make what you guys did is with your own youtube your own instagram build your own pirate
ship and sail dude it's fun yeah well what else um where are you from sam
i'm from upstate new york just outside syracuse a little place called courtland new york
courtland has the highest rate of incest and welfare recipients in the entire state of new
york nice yeah we're shady all that oh yeah dude Yeah. I mean, my area, I call it ghetto country, like hood farmers.
Yeah.
Like, they're redneck, and they are hood.
And it's like, I mean, we have cow crossings and meth labs.
It's like shady as shit.
Do you go back a lot?
Oh, yeah.
My mom's there.
Nice.
I think I'm going to shoot my special there.
Do you like going back?
I love seeing my mom and my friends off and running.
Do you have old buddies that you can keep in touch?
Yeah.
Yeah.
They're all
married so i see them here and there you know but i love it dude do you like playing with their kids
no i don't like to play with anybody kid it just creeps me out you feel creepy well i feel like
you like i'm just gonna swear at any moment and i'm gonna be the bad guy but they might the kids
might like you because they'll i mean the kids they can feel authenticity yeah i mean they all
got porn on their phone so i mean they don't really care about swear words i think the parents care more you drop some truth on them yeah oh yeah
just get these kids early yeah you know what's so funny i do joke about how like um the first
conspiracy is santa claus if you think about it like it's the first time everybody's in on it
except for you right and they're all lying to you and they're blackmailing you with it they're like
if you don't do this you're not gonna get guests right like fuck and then one woke kid just comes goes it's all right right yeah like
that's how it was i've always been my dad was a very interesting person because he told me like
he goes never believe anything in what you hear and half what you see right yeah you always tell
me someone disrespects you you fucking go harder at them that's the worst advice to give to somebody
in the fucking world especially in this town right you think he do you think he lived that out
oh yeah man the blessings of my father's i learned all the mistakes and i saw them coming
yeah yeah for sure but i mean he would um right i went to i went to upstate new york i was class
clown in sixth grade class clown in uh 12th grade and i flunked first grade don't you think they
should give scholarships for that if you're like
the funniest in school?
You should get something.
Like if you're the best athlete.
You should get
some recognition.
I got no offers
from Ohio State.
Were you classed?
I was voted funniest.
I was.
Yeah.
Now,
did you get chicks
in high school?
No.
I got none.
Yeah, none.
None.
I had a couple girls
I fooled around with,
you know,
but then you go to college
and it's just on.
Dude, college was the best.
Where'd you go?
Santa Clara.
Oh, it's the best time.
And these kids are all going there and they're all getting outraged and everything's about protesting and everything's, you're ruining the best years of your life.
Yeah.
College is literally like being a rapper.
You're supposed to be in like swim trunks on a lawn, blacked out.
Dropping molly, banging everything that moves.
I don't remember doing-
Wearing rollerblades.
I don't even remember doing homework.
Does anyone remember doing homework?
It is fun.
I studied philosophy.
That was my major.
And people were like, who's your favorite philosopher?
I'm like, what?
Yeah.
What are you talking about?
Who is a good philosopher?
I don't know.
Plato?
Plato, Kant.
Nietzsche?
Descartes.
Nietzsche's pretty good.
I consider Viktor Frankl a philosopher.
I have no clue who these people are.
Have you gotten into philosophy at all?
No.
Coe?
No.
Sartre?
I went to school.
Sartre's good.
Oh, is he?
What makes him good?
I don't know, but I remember him being good.
Are there any chick philosophers, Aaron? Yeah, his wife de bovar and she what what was her philosophy she was big
in a feminist give me half your shit no no they were like partners in crime what's your show do
you like to watch i'm watching barry right now watching veep um always go back to seinfeld
and then just youtube it up youtube On Truth. YouTube your podcast.
Oh, thank you, dude.
Dude, buy a tinfoil hat.
Check it out, guys.
Dude, yeah.
For life.
How long have you guys
been doing it for?
A little over two years.
It's fun.
I love it.
I love it.
It's fun.
The world is way more crazier
than anybody thinks.
It's so much better.
Yeah.
I love the UFO talk.
I love Farsight of the Moon.
All that kind of stuff.
The moon's weird, dude.
All the kind of space.
The Moon is weird.
Should we dive into that?
Yeah.
The Moon's really weird.
It's the only thing in the universe or our galaxy that perfectly rotates around the Earth.
And it doesn't spin.
We always see the same side.
It's too big.
It's like it's bigger than Pluto.
There's no reason why it should be stuck in our gravity force.
It's the biggest moon in the galaxy, right?
Yeah, it's bigger than Pluto.
Yeah.
Wait, what?
It's bigger than any other moon.
Oh, our moon is the biggest?
Yeah.
That's right.
The biggest.
That's damn right, dog.
And it doesn't make any sense.
It makes no sense.
How did it get there? There's cultures't make any sense. It makes no sense. Well, how'd it get there?
There's cultures that say there was a time with no moon.
The moon affects the tide, right?
Affects water.
We're, what, 80, 90% water?
95% water?
Affects our moods, too.
Is it that much?
Yeah, when someone goes, oh, it's a full moon,
that means something, dude.
Yeah, I forgot.
Wait, so what's your theory on how it got there uh do you really want to hear it yeah please i think
it's an energy collector i think for what for um both our souls and just our fears and anger and
like that's why everything's so crazy right now there's a group of people whose whole job is to
make us super miserable all the time,
make us fight, and it feeds off that energy.
So the moon was created by people.
It was created by the belief is Anunnaki, maybe.
Yeah, you think it was Anunnaki?
Yeah, and then they created Reptile.
Who's Anunnaki?
I don't know much about them.
They're like aliens that...
Have you ever heard of Planet X?
No.
There's a, what is it, Aaron?
10th planet?
Yeah, that's what Eddie Bravo's jujitsu is named after, 10th planet.
And supposedly there is a super advanced alien species there
that came to Earth and created us.
And that's the missing link between us and monkeys.
They put their DNA in us and created us in the Sumerians and the Sumerians came out of the the the caves
with full language full laws of society tools and science wait so you really so
you really do think it's on you Anunnaki yeah when you start thinking about
Anunnaki it starts making sense so they us, we were supposed to be like a kind of slave thing. We're a slave colony, a slave labor, and
we were supposed to mine gold. That's why gold is so important, okay? And then they created this
kind of ruling class, which everybody calls the lizard people, right? And you kind of go back in
history, there's always been this ruling class, i nobody knows why they're the rulers why did we have pharaohs why do we have royal families
why do we have this elite group that's always in charge and the belief is that they are they
were made direct descendants uh they're more reptilian they have more reptilian uh brain than
us that's why people call them lizard people and their job is to hoard us and control us.
It's like it goes all the way.
There's always been some ruling class that's ran everything and made us all fight with each other.
And how come all the presidents except for one are related?
Wait, are they all related?
Yeah, all except for one.
And it's not Baraka. But where does that information come from?
Well, so this one girl, she was in like, I want to say fifth or fourth grade, right?
She decides to do a project.
And she wants to do all the family trees of all the presidents.
And so she starts doing it, and she comes to find out,
when she does all the family trees, that they're all related.
Except for who, Trump?
No, I think Trump's in there too, man.
He's a super elite as well.
I forget the name of the one president,
but it's one president that was not in with them.
The rest of them, all related.
Clintons are related to everybody.
I mean, like someone's saying like Brad Pitt and Barack Obama are related.
It's like this weird.
I can see that.
Are you a David Icke fan?
Yeah, I love him, dude.
I saw him when i was 16 my cousins
hans and chapman took me to see him and they're both kind of like um similar thinking well you
know he was in la and they banned his show his movie oh really yeah he's just in la supposed
to have a movie premiere yesterday and they banned it two hours before which i don't understand what
is he saying that's so crazy my snapping a a lot of photos. They always talk about the secret societies.
My stepdad was in a secret society.
Oh, what was it?
Not Skull and Bones.
Another one.
I don't know the name.
It's that secret.
It's that secret.
But he said, maybe I shouldn't talk about this
because he's like, don't talk about it.
But they would just booze, I guess.
What do you mean?
In like a basement.
That's what he said.
That's not much of a...
Did they run anything or was it just like... No, he just said they would just meet up and just booze together guess what do you like a basement that's what he said that's not much of a did they run
anything or was it just like he just said they would just meet up and just booze together they
ran shit on the pickup basketball court for sure yeah so but i don't know but it's like it's not
school doesn't sound like a secret society sounds like um like trying to be school a weird poker
game maybe i don't bill clinton had that clever response someone asked him about that like
republican place bilderberg the yeah is that the one in like northern california no no that is um
where the fuck is that something with the giant owl yeah i remember but someone asked bill clinton
is that where all the republicans get drunk and pee outside it's uh bohemian grove there we go
some shady shit back there dude when did you, uh, thinking what you were being told?
Wasn't like what actually was,
um,
is,
I mean,
I,
I really knew that JFK was full of shit,
uh,
that the whole,
that whole thing made no sense.
Um,
I remember when,
uh,
the iron chic and,
um,
hacksaw Jim Duggan got busted in a car together drunk and i
was like oh my they're supposed to hate each other yeah now they're fucking friends it's all a lie
so then bill clinton his whole you guys are too young for bill clinton but during his whole
presidency it was just like he fucked fat chicks and all this shit and it was all these awful
like fucking like all these sex scandals and then when it was done, Trent Lott was getting his painting put in the Library of Congress.
And so it shows up.
Trent Lott shows up.
Newt Gingrich shows up.
Oral Hat shows up.
And Bill Clinton shows up.
And I'm like, why is Bill Clinton there?
And he's smiling with everybody i'm like these
guys tried to ruin you and that's when i go oh dude they were just lying to us they're all
fucking friends yeah and then you take a look at like trump and the clintons their daughters are
best friends they're like so you don't think he's like a renegade no word is is that he gave uh he
uses consent his casinos to launder drug money money for cartels because
he's going broke yeah so he would launder money for them so he's always been in and then the cia
runs all the drug stuff so it's just really interesting but i just want to talk about
chicks let's go no but i was wondering do you ever wonder though like what if you're wrong
uh i mean like i'll always if I'm wrong, I'll admit it.
I mean, Aaron thinks I'm more wrong than I am, but I'll admit it.
But how but how would we know?
How will we know if if we're wrong about these theories?
Well, I mean, time will show that you're probably more right than you are wrong.
Like 9-11.
Right.
We were like, dude, it's inside job.
Over time, we find out that you know the saudis fucking
funded it john brennan cia basically created it but most people still think it wasn't an inside
job right no i think more people now think it was an inside job and then the rest of people are
idiots that's sort of the stuff like the ufos with like the ufos there's all this evidence out there of
ufos and like existent but people just don't care you know what i mean like like they'll put out in
the news but like in that one episode with sean joshy's i said he's like there's all this like
concrete evidence of pilots saying they see ufos and sometimes they put it in the news but it seems
like the general population just
doesn't it doesn't take hold well they the u.s government came out and said yeah we have a ufo
program and nobody gave a shit yeah nobody gave shit instagram still taking pictures instagram
models still taking pictures of the buttholes ass up face down couldn't care less that we have a
ufo program nobody cared i just think people are slowly but surely weaning off the corporate news
and slowly but surely just not really like you know what i'm just gonna take care of myself and
be a good person and not give a shit about all that stuff do you think a lot of people are like
they'll like see this kind of like true stuff on the internet or whatever and they'll believe it
but be too scared to be vocal about it there is that too there's a lot of people
afraid to say something what are they afraid afraid of judgment or afraid of the government
doing something judgment uh ruining their standing in the community yeah i think there's a lot like
societal kind of yeah i'm guilty of it yeah implications or whatever yeah dude listen to
me matt the most honest you are to whoever you are, the happiest you'll be.
When you start making business decisions in your life for like how you're going to conduct yourself, what kind of art you're going to create, you're just going to be miserable because you're chasing something that's not guaranteed.
When you are you to the bone and you treat people well, you're going to be able to go amazing places.
We live in assimilation, dude.
I know people think I'm crazy.
It really is assimilation.
The more and more you look into it, it's assimilation.
You know, do I believe in?
Okay, so I believe in assimilation, right?
There's people who believe in like flat earth.
We live in a dome.
Anything's possible.
I've done no research into it, so I always tell people that.
I was raised thinking it's a ball, It's a globe. I still think that but I've done no research into it
I've never looked into it. I've never done the test that they tell me to do to see if it is a ball
I just go with it. Yeah, but what I really do is that we live in a simulation that is conducted
Maybe under a dome and that just like when you see on Star Wars a holodeck,
now there's this whole, you can go all these amazing places on the holodeck,
but you're still in the middle of the holodeck.
So I do believe in space, and I believe in all that shit.
But I just think it's all part of the simulation.
And just like The Matrix, The Matrix was a documentary.
We live in a video game.
I can prove that that's not true. Okay. No, no, totally. Go for it. That it wasn't a documentary okay we live in the video game i can prove that that's not true okay no no totally
go for it that it wasn't a documentary well obviously but the point is it's like when he
says that you can control all yourself just like any video game right there's rules to the video
game uh super mario can't fly you can't fucking do karate you can't shoot fireballs there's rules
there's rules of this one you
can't fly in a simulation okay that because they want you to be what's that mario can actually do
mario can't shoot fire if he uh if he touches a flower he can he turns red and white can turn
you're right and then he flies if he gets no i was thinking donkey kong i was thinking donkey
kong sorry about that you're right in. In the Super Mario game, he can.
That's what I'm here for, guys.
Thank you.
I hate Aaron.
Open your mind.
But it's just interesting.
I just think that.
So the point of that whole thing is that you can control your destiny.
If you want something to happen, you can will it to happen.
I'm totally on board with that.
It's for having the intention and the vision and just working towards it
and just sort of having that positive kind of,
uh,
you just,
I,
I,
that's why I kind of,
you know,
you have to kind of obsess over it,
dedicate your life to it and you just work towards it as opposed to kind of
letting,
like I deleted the news apps from my phone because I'm like,
why am I,
why am I letting this affect my day?
They're lies.
They're all lies.
Why is this going to,
this is going to put me in a bad mood where it's taking me
off course from what i'm trying to do it's all lies they're just lying to you to manipulate you
i've learned through my podcast what is up is down it's an upside down world everything you
believe in isn't real they were all just lies for fucking millenniums they've been lying to you
so it's like don't worry about just control you and treat people well don't
steal don't hurt don't harm anybody and you'll live a wonderful life that's my aunt and just be
a hard worker and you'll be work smart not hard i think it's great i love it dude my life has
changed in two years just by just realizing fuck everything yeah and when you you know when you do
your art be you man go hard in the paint i not saying you got to scream and shout and be filthy.
Whatever you are, amplify that shit.
Yeah.
Don't try to please everybody.
Cruise ships are full of everybody who played the game.
Yeah.
And it didn't work out.
And now they're on a cruise ship doing jokes.
And I have a lot of friends.
God bless them.
But it's like, man, the people who are true to their shit with the internet, you can find
your following.
Yeah.
And they will grow with you.
Yeah.
And it's beautiful, dude.
And you don't need a...
Dude, I ripped into Judd Apatow.
I like laid into that motherfucker.
Nothing happened.
Yeah.
Have you seen Judd since?
He called me.
So some...
Texted me.
Oh, what'd you guys talk about?
He texted me about Brody and then I never heard from him again.
And to be honest with you, I don't give a fuck.
But when he called you...
I don't have anything against him did you guys did you guys
talk about because no we text he's just for some for some context uh judd uh trashed louis ck after
the set got leaked of louis performing at a club and he didn't know he was being recorded and he
did some jokes about the parkland kids and judd apatow said he was punching down and it was
representative of our culture's inability to feel empathy and
then sam you responded by saying what uh i'm on team lou ck go fuck yourself judd apatow
you're a weekend warrior you do this when you took a cheat code to get to where we are basically
yeah that's what yeah i think that is what you said you know it's like and again you mean in
the stand-up community because he left stand-up became like a super successful director and now
he's doing stand-up again and got a netflix special well he his family were mean in the stand-up community? Because he left stand-up, became like a super successful director, and now he's doing stand-up again and got a Netflix special.
Well, his family were big in the entertainment business.
Right.
Oh, and you also think he kind of soft pedals how much of an advantage he had.
Yeah, for sure, dude.
I mean, for sure.
Imagine, do you think Judd, listen, I have nothing against him, man.
I moved on.
It's good.
But do you think Judd Apatow would ever tell any directors the rules of comedy, of directing,
what they can or cannot do?
He'd never do it.
Right.
He would never do it.
He'd be fucking ran out of Hollywood.
Yeah.
Right?
Oh, you can't do this.
You can't.
I mean, dude.
Yeah.
Who's selling tickets?
Bill Burr, Joe Rogan, Joey Diaz.
Dude, Anthony Jezeldink
Cause they're fucking raw
What about Mulaney
But he's not in LA
But he's funny dude
I mean he's a great writer
But I would say that's him
Yeah right
That's him
I guess that's the thing
I'm always saying
Jerry Seinfeld's a very clean guy
It's not about being like
It's not that there can't be
A good PC comedian
It's just that
Anti-PC comedians
Should be allowed to If you're a politically PC comedian. It's just that anti-PC comedians should be allowed to...
If you're a politically incorrect person, you should be that on stage.
Right.
Well, I don't know.
I see a lot of idiots, though, who aren't good enough at those kind of jokes doing those things.
And all they're doing is...
And maybe that's just the process.
But they're doing...
Those guys like Bill Burr are so brilliant that they can take those offensive subjects and make them palatable to a huge audience but i see a lot of like white belts doing trying to do bill burr
so but if you think do you think if they did clean material be going better for them are they just not
great comics well i just think like some of that stuff requires like black belt skill and like
maybe you don't know until you practice to get there yeah but but yeah but bill burr did start
off doing clean material, right?
Like he did say
for the first like six years
he didn't like curse and stuff.
Maybe.
Maybe because that's
what he had to do.
But his big thing
when he blew up
was when he was screaming
at Philadelphia.
That was a big moment for him.
Well, that was very authentic
like you were talking about.
He was doing clean material
and then he came to LA.
He got like a sitcom
and then it went under
and then it's when
he dedicated himself to stand up and that's when he sort of found his true self and i always kind
of wanted you know it's like find your true self it's like i think a lot of us are like for example
i was grown up i was taught to be very polite and all that kind of stuff so like when do you
kind of know you're being your true self? If you're saying something yourself offstage, you should work it onstage.
Gotcha.
You think everything, every thought?
Yeah.
Whatever you do offstage should be amplified onstage.
Do you share everything about your life?
Yeah, pretty much.
I'm convincingly going to be blackmailed by the CIA,
so I just talk about it onstage.
I'm the same way.
You know,
like I fucked a couch when I was in like fifth grade.
And like,
I talk about it.
I'm convinced they're going to fucking tell me that.
Pay attention to what,
what you're saying in your head offstage.
Yeah.
And write that down.
Turn everything into a joke.
Yeah.
Everything.
Yeah.
Your thought,
if you see yourself saying something over and over again,
bring it to the stage.
That was kind of a big moment for me where i was like because when i first started stand-up
i was like yeah everyone was doing lucy k so i was like oh i got to be self-deprecating vulnerable
and then i took a step back i'm like what do i really care about it's like my hair
you know what i mean there's nothing talking about that and that's where that started to connect
that's something that's important to you that's why it resonates yeah because it's authentic yeah
that's me if you're sitting down and like dude listen not all clean comics are assholes
but most asshole comics were clean okay it's just the truth dude dude I've been around for a long time the nicest guys
out there David Tell, Nick DiPaolo, Bill Burr, Joey why because they get that they get it out
on stage and they could just and they're just laid back they don't have to bottle it up when
people start making business decisions on stage it affects their mentality i'm telling you i've seen it happen a thousand times look at
ellen she's a notorious bitch she's a bitch why because she's dancing with kids on that's not i
mean i don't think i mean deep down inside i don't think that she enjoys that yeah but she's done it
to get to where she wants to be well so who's like who's like a nice comedian on stage like uh ellen's a good example
um that's an asshole or that's is there any nice comedians who are nice steve steve uh steve simone
is clean as shit and then literally the nicest human being ever met brody stevens was one of
the nicest people he ever met yeah i mean we could just go down the list is that an enjoy it tattoo
you have yeah that's cool oh you got it tattooed yeah
actually passed which is weird because they didn't know which hand which wrist to put it on
because they jerk off with this one right so i was like do i want to have brody it's the right
message i'm like he's 10 gay so i said fuck it dude that's one of the best clips on the internet
10 have you seen that oh when he's on rogan i love so i'm so sad he's gone yeah you
know but again it's like he just let uh he let the industry get to him fuck the industry do you
yeah you guys are doing it with your youtube yeah yeah you're one of our first big supporters
thank you oh you guys are funny from the start i love that clip oh thank you yeah the house party
clip sam was one of the first guys to share it.
And you guys are smart, man.
You work the internet, dude.
I try to tell everybody, like, I'm Harriet Tubman.
I'm telling these slaves how to fucking escape.
That's what the eyes are, the internet.
Work on your YouTube.
Even if you're not even in entertainment, work on your YouTube.
And also because we just start doing this stuff ourselves,
that's sort of where it's like our truest art, I guess,
because it's what we love.
You're great at it and you're fearless.
And that's what makes it work.
You guys have no fear.
Oh, thank you.
You know what else is like that?
Steve Randolph.
I think I have no fear.
Oh, yeah, yeah.
I think I have a lot of fear.
Well, what it doesn't show in the video is you guys go into some shit
and just stay in the pocket. That's a that's fine thank you yeah it's fun the
adrenaline rush is fun yeah I tell people when they're dealing when they're
doing crowd work when they're dealing with hecklers don't think just talk
first did it take a lot of work to get to that yeah I feel like it does no
you know so interesting man is like I've had a very interesting life i was never good at school and the only thing i've ever
been good at is just ripping people new assholes i don't know why it's just been a thing i had
is that new york well so i i came from a generation where all the kids all their parents got divorced
and it was the first generation that happened to and it was fucking them up Yeah, their skull they couldn't handle it and they were really broken
I mean you think about it being like the first generation where that happens and there's no like
Precedent or anything to relate it to and it just and they became very angry bitter
Nasty, so at some point we just stopped fighting with each other and we just and my parents stayed together until my brother left high school but um we became very nasty with each other like verbally
we would just fucking annihilate people we'd go to this pizza shop and we'd sit in the booth and
if you sat in this one particular seat you would just get lit up by everybody and you just learn
you had to learn how to return fire very quickly. And it just became a natural thing that happened to me.
Was there places you guys wouldn't go?
Was there like a no-fly zone?
No.
They used to call in college a triply low blow.
Like I would say it.
And I would say it.
Did you ever feel bad afterwards?
No.
No.
I mean, that's what I do, dude.
That's just what I do.
And it's just like I talk mad shit.
And so I got really thick skin at this.
So I go to college.
And like I had like two girlfriends in high school. And so I got really thick skin at this. So I go to college and like, I had like two
girlfriends in high school. And so I go to college and funny guys, suddenly sexy. And it's just on
join a fraternity. And I'm just lighting everybody up. That's my, I just lied. They, they, they don't
want to fight me because then if you fight your friends, you lose and they try to spark. And I
just light people up. So I started doing standup and I remember I do a show at UNLV and they try to spark and i just light people up so i started doing stand-up and i remember i do a show at unlv and i went to unlv and i've done two shows there i've bombed both
times bombed at my colleges so i i do show early and my friend who would come from la he's like
hey dude there's another show later tonight here i go you can go up twice in one night he goes yeah
i go oh fuck i'm gonna go and it was at this place called played against sam's so i go up there and i'm doing stand-up and this drunk mechanic comes up
to me and he starts talking shit to me and dude it was like when neo just goes and he goes i'm
the one i just fucking ripped this guy and the place explodes and i'm like whoa i know kung fu right yeah and from there it's always
been my thing dude that's cool but then i you know crowd work i think is too easy so i like
to write jokes but then it took me a long time to learn to be a good joke writer and that just
takes time and it's just but i love it dudeup. How much time did it take you to build your first hour? I didn't put out my first hour until I was 10 years in.
I think you should put out content now.
Boom, boom, boom.
Put stand-up now?
20.
I mean, 20 minutes, 20 minutes, 20.
I do like putting out a smaller set.
Do smaller sets.
I've been doing it for like five years, and I don't want to –
I've been really hesitant to put out any stand-up stuff
yeah i get that man okay then don't do it maybe waiting over a couple years but
people get so like oh it's gotta be perfect you know ari shafir said something to me one time he
goes triply you're always trying to work up here everybody else is working down here yeah their
expectations are so much lower and not that you should lower your expectations should always work
hard and demand the best.
But you have to kind of be like, it's good enough, man.
That's a good point.
Yeah, there's something about putting stand-up out, though.
It's harder.
Because it's different.
You just don't know how people watching a screen will react to it
as opposed to a live audience.
Do you know what I mean?
Or is that just something you get over once you start putting it out?
I'm at a place where I'm more comfortable saying the craziest shit to a crowd.
But I don't know if I want that crazy thing I said to exist forever.
Oh, yeah.
No, you do.
The crazier it is, the more you want it out there.
Dude, I mean, we're just talking Kardashians, right?
I mean, that is train wreck publicity, marketing.
They make the biggest train wreck they can, and everybody comes to see it.
So the crazier it is, the more you put it out.
I'm just getting tired of it.
I don't know if I'm as tough as them.
They're, like, tough.
Dude, you went in front of a fucking city council and fucking argued about house parties.
Like, that's pretty fucking brave, man.
This will probably come out by the time the videos come out,
but he sang Toxic by Britney Spears in front of them yesterday.
Dude, that's brave, bro.
I guess that feels more true to me than like...
But your stand-up's pretty true to you.
Yeah, my stand-up's pretty authentic, too.
Yeah, thank you.
Here's the thing. I'm 46 years old.
You look great.
I should be irrelevant.
I should.
I should be at an age where I've been pushed out.
But the younger generation thinks there's rules to this shit.
And that's why they're not doing anything.
So old guys, I remember Bill Burr said,
he's like, dude, now it's old guys are the edgy ones.
Yeah.
Oh, yeah.
We just go out there and I just say,
I go, what can I talk about?
And then I write jokes about it and I go up on stage
and I talk about it. And I just call them out on the bullshit like comedy has real world consequences
so nobody ever went to a comedy club and went on a fucking crime spree but i but i do i don't know
man i do i i mean this is like the least violent time in human history but i do think that like
getting to meet some of the people who listen to our podcast like the depth to which something and i'm don't mean this in a braggy douchey way but like
it's it's it's something i've experienced like the depth to which people stuff can hit them like it
can change their perspective like even like commercials the notion is if you do a joke
about something means you don't like them that's just ridiculous right like the notion that like i can't talk about funny things black people do is ridiculous because people are like oh we're
just gonna go back to separate fountains like black people don't do funny shit and i can't talk
about it it's dumb if i'm fucking doing hate speech yeah hate that shit but these rules of
comedy so that fucking white chicks can feel
comfortable with themselves i do joke about it's called oppression math and they just let some
people say stuff and some it seems like also with your podcast you're able to build a fan base
because that's when you sort of i've only known you since you've done it but it seems like you
you were able to just say this is why i I believe. I don't give a fuck.
Yeah.
Like, I believe in, you know, Anunnaki, all this kind of stuff.
And that's when the fan base just grew because it's sort of your truth.
Be original to yourself.
Yeah.
Now, you can play the game and hope it hits, but it doesn't hit for everybody.
Yeah.
But authentic people can find a fucking crowd.
Yeah.
Yeah.
And that, to me, is amazing.
And they won't leave you they'll just keep
growing with you yeah and that's what you want to do like i did a show in tacoma me and eddie bravo
and i was on stage i'm getting laughs i'm like wow this sounds like burt kreischer laughs like i
found my crowd for bill burr had a great saying he goes until you're famous every show's an away
game yeah i've heard that and then when you're then when you're
um famous every every show's a home game now i'm not famous at all but within this group of people
i'm famous and it's just like boom boom boom and it's like such an amazing thing because i'd rather
do that because i've been a wandering fucking ronin know, just playing any crowd for like 23 years.
And like I was born and bred at the comedy store, came out of Vegas, went to the comedy
store, stayed there forever and just went on the road when being raw.
I mean, like you think politically correct right now is weird.
It used to be super conservative.
They were the original censors.
Can't say swear words.
Can't talk about sex.
Can't do all that stuff.
That was censorship came from the right.
Now it's coming from the left.
And feelings.
We got feelings.
But nobody goes to shows anymore because nobody gives a fuck.
Pissing people off is an emotion.
They enjoy it.
Gets them out of their fucking head.
Yeah.
Just go for it don't pull
punches and don't apologize who are you talking to I'm talking to fucking you on
stage don't go oh I shouldn't say that if you think it say it right be what do
you what about the culture at large it doesn't exist it's fake it's it's an
internet it's an internet social social media, mainstream media bullshit.
But do you think most people outside of performers are being too PC?
I think when you're at work, like the office, you got to be PC.
But I think when people leave there, they want to fucking hear the truth.
Right.
But you just mean in comedy, though.
Yeah, and here's another thing.
Now we don't know who the racists are.
Nobody talks about who they really are. comedy though yeah and here's another thing now we don't know who the racists are nobody talks
about who they really are i like knowing who the assholes were the racists and the scumbags and
the sexists and all those fucking people and the homophobes so i wouldn't hang out with them now
everybody's we're creating a culture of liars just like in washington washington dc our politicians
lie to us we know and we just accept it. Now you've got to be a really
good liar to make it deep into
entertainment. I say, fuck
that. Be you.
Be authentic. Your
biggest crowd might be 300 people
in any fucking market. That's still
pretty fucking good.
While you're trying to be Seinfeld.
Dude, I used to co-headline with
Sebastian Mascalco.
He just played the Madison Square Garden four times.
If I did him, would I be there?
No.
I'd be fucking miserable.
You got to do you, dude.
Don't worry about what people think.
Worry about what the people that love you
and feed them.
Fuck the haters, dude.
Don't come to the show. If I don't't walk a table i haven't done my job i love walking tables i love it get the fuck out of here yeah you can't hear it's
and guys dude nothing's worse than guys who get mad at dirty jokes like you're a scumbag
you know it yeah you're you're into weird shit right and you're getting offended by words it's annoying
that's like patrice said um whenever he felt like he was losing the audience he would just go harder
and they would stay as opposed to trying to win them back that's when he'd lose i'll give them
five minutes if they're not on board i'm grabbing i'm fucking hijacking the plane and i'm flying
into a building okay you want to do this. You want to do this, dude?
You want to do this?
I'm going to go fucking hard.
Yeah.
My whole philosophy since I started was your will to kill has to be stronger than their will not to laugh.
Yeah.
That's nice.
That's cool.
Wait.
So we were going to,
I was going to catch up real quick.
We do some sports talk with Chad.
Let's do it.
He's one of the smallest sports fans I know in terms of the size of
his fandom. So we're
in the second round of the NBA playoffs.
Chad, can I get your picks?
Who do you think is going to win
in the most high profile matchup
between the Golden State Warriors and the Houston Rockets?
Warriors at this moment are up 2-0.
Golden State.
It's golden.
That's the best analysis i've ever heard my life yeah who do you got it's golden baby portland trailblazers versus the uh denver nuggets
i love chicken nuggets so denver boom that's it i like that pick eastern conference we got
philadelphia versus toronto philadelphia versus toronto it's one one
76ers versus the raptors raptors or toronto um you know i'm always pulling for canada so
you guys ever gig there no i've never you should it's the best go to toronto you'll love it i've
heard it's i heard it's amazing all the chicks are hot they're all it's the biggest melting pot
it's like san francisco just with fuckable people.
Oh, nice.
So you got Toronto.
Toronto, yeah.
And then in the last one, who do you have?
The Boston Celtics or the Milwaukee Bucks?
Let's go Milwaukee.
I like that.
I like Milwaukee beers.
Are you a sports fan?
Yeah, big time.
What about you?
Yeah, you do a sports podcast.
I love it.
I think this is the best round of playoffs I can ever remember.
Are you a Raiders fan?
Raiders?
Dodgers, Clippers.
Oh, Clippers.
And then I have second teams, which are, I like the Bills because I'm from that area.
Yeah.
I like the Angels because I'm from that area. Yeah. I like the angels because I like Mike trout and then a Nick fan.
Cause I was a patch queuing.
What do you think about this landing zone conversation that's happening in the
NBA right now with a hardened?
Cause he jackknifes his legs out.
So there's,
there's a big argument whether he should get those free throw.
I don't think he should.
I think the only time a foul should happen is if the ball is still in your hands.
Right.
If it's all left to your hand, you could fucking hack him for all I give a shit.
It doesn't affect the trajectory of the ball.
It's too much touchy-feely.
It's too much, man.
Steph Curry, I mean, I love him to death.
I think he's the greatest shooter ever to play.
For sure.
But they just let that guy tiptoe down the tulip through the fucking lane hit him who do you think is gonna win the title well if golden state gets
through this yeah i think it's gonna be golden state i think durant's leaving in the offseason
i think this is the last year yeah but if they don't get past houston it's it's over uh i think
i think boston's gonna come out of the East.
They got a lot of talent.
They probably have the most good players on one team.
They're very deep.
I mean, Al Harford is the most underrated player in the history of the NBA.
Think about all the shit he's done.
Won two championships at Florida.
Went to Atlanta.
More underrated than George Mikan.
Yes.
It's close, though.
Good point.
That was very close. Old white guy who moved like a ladder versus
I think they had to change the rules
for Mikan. They had to make the lane
six feet wider to stop him from
dominating in the post.
I think you're talking about Walt Chamberlain.
He was the next one. No, he was before
Will. He was one they didn't let black people
play. No, I mean, Will, they changed the rules after mike and like wilt they changed he was already gone but yeah
mike was the first one but they gave mike and credit for it's like hey it's will but we're
no so mike in place they changed the rules then wilt comes in they changed the rules again well
dude that's what uh that's how you know you're a great player When they make rule changes for you Yeah
I think LeBron James is going to fall off
From his ranking
On top of everything
I think if Kevin Durant wins, there's an argument
He's better than LeBron
It's an interesting thing
Normally right now we answer questions
From a
Did I ruin this podcast?
No
Before we go into questions i just
gotta because this is so near and dear to my heart what's going on in malibu with that underground
military base is that base yeah summer is this submarine like port yep dude it's out there dude
what about the fire we should cover some more because you got some other ones. What about the fires, man? Oh, yeah.
So we saw metal melt.
Metal melts at 1,500 degrees.
The hottest a forest can get is 1,200 degrees.
No, excuse me.
Metal melts at 2,500 degrees.
The hottest a forest fire can get is 1500 degrees
how did that metal melt?
wait how do we know that's recorded I guess
what?
that a forest fire can only get up to that temp
so you think
direct energy weapons
you really believe that? 100 are what are direct energy weapons
uh they're just basically the base that has the direct energy weapons is located in
north california and basically if you look at the way the fire burnt
houses burned houses didn't burn they incinerated and trees
were left you're like well sam there's waters in the trees okay why was there a fire there's a
drought oh but i thought there was a drought why would the water be in the trees if we had a drought
it doesn't make any sense you don't see metal melt like that from a forest fire so you do you think
they started the fire or they like or it's like a direct energy thing that just sweeps across?
So Diana Feinstein's husband is part of a billion-dollar
high-speed rail system that they want put in California
that goes to Las Vegas,
and it goes right down where the fire was.
It would be too expensive to buy all that land.
Oh, interesting.
So you think that's why they did it?
There's something called Agenda 21,
which is they want to move everybody into big cities.
They don't want anybody in the country.
They want everybody in big cities.
That's a big push to do that.
Get everybody in the city, get everybody in the cities.
Look at where
they burnt look at all the weed places they went they burnt all those weed farms down
because all these fucking corporations want that weed money dude it's like it's crazy dude wow
that's crazy it is dude it is i mean those fires were freaking nature for sure dude i i know people
came up to me when they were in Santa Rosa
said they saw people relighting fires.
Oh, I've heard that, yeah, yeah.
I saw the burn marks in Santa Rosa.
It was interesting.
What are those?
Like where the fire went.
Oh, interesting, yeah.
What did it look like?
It just looked like where a fire was burned.
So not that interesting, but I saw where it burned.
Cars melting.
I saw the carnage, yeah.
Cars melting with trees sitting right by them.
Yeah.
Weird.
You got any other ones?
Do I have any other ones?
UFOs, I mean, the formation, 1952.
Like, Mandela effect, that's cool.
Donald Trump, the time traveler.
Well, you know, I think we do have time travel.
I think the CIA and the government have figured out how to time travel.
So it's interdimensional?
Well, yeah, there are multiple dimensions,
which the Mandela effect's all about.
So the CERN thing, which is a particle collider has been smashing smashing smashing particles to see how small they can get
to and the smallest one they've gotten to is a uh basically um something that's the form of a
pentagram how crazy is that wow so you get this uh so ever since they did that they think they ripped a hole in the fabric of
time and and everything's just interweaving oh so there's all these things that people remember but
it's not that yeah you remember like queen song at the end of the song how's it go
what's the last line of what of the queen song um we are the champions no time for loot because
we are the champions of the world okay sing it how's it go because we are the champions. No time for loot. Because we are the champions of the world.
Okay.
Sing it.
How's it go?
Because we are the champions of the world.
That doesn't exist.
You don't sing that part.
Of the world isn't part of the song. But everybody remembers it as part of the song.
Oh, yeah.
There's tons of stuff like that.
Tons of stuff.
But what's the cereal box?
Wait, so. isn't there a
cereal box yeah i forgot i forget what wait so are you saying that they the someone working for the
illuminati started chanting that at the end of the when people were singing the song no that's from a
different dimension people think we're in a two you Oh. So like they sing it that way in...
In a different reality.
In a different reality where Queen did put that part of the song in.
There is a belief that there's...
And it sips through somehow through like cosmic osmosis.
Yeah.
There's so many dimensions that every decision you make,
there's a dimension you may be able to decision.
I really dislike that theory just because I love my life so much.
I don't like the idea of the different decisions.
Yeah, the reality where you're not into tanning.
Or a reality where you married your high school.
Go to Little Baron Trump, the book.
Oh, yeah.
Donald Trump, the time traveler.
So Tesla.
The guy or the company?
The guy.
The guy.
See that?
Click that where it says the first book.
Click it.
See that book?
Now open it up a little bit.
Like kind of fucking spread it open.
You know, like widen it.
Widen it.
There we go.
Now look who that kid looks like.
Who does that look like?
It looks like Donald Trump.
It looks like Donald Trump's son, Baron Trump.
That looks like his dog.
That's almost like a fidget spinner.
That book is called Little Baron Trump.
It was written in the 1800s.
So you think that's like
their earlier incarnation of Baron Trump?
Well, so Nazis killed Tesla.
There's a Nazi said he choked Tesla out.
Before the government went and got all Tesla's plans,
Donald Trump's uncle, who went to Yale,
went there and grabbed all of his plans,
including his time travel plan.
So there's people who think that you could time travel and that, and that they've had time travel for a while. And that's how they can, they find
out who's going to win, who's going to win the presidency. They go back, they blackmail them,
they control them and all that shit. It's like the ultimate weapon of destruction.
Now here's an interesting thing. When, you know, Iraq, we went in Iraq. Oh, it's weapons of mass destruction.
Everyone's like they didn't find any.
There is a belief because that area is a place called Mesopotamia.
That's where Mesopotamia was.
And that's where all the wars are forever.
There's always fighting over that area.
Why is that?
Well, it's very special, the civilization of mankind.
And there's this belief that there's a Stargate in Iraq.
And that was the weapon of mass destruction
and that when the U.S. soldiers went into Iraq,
they didn't start fucking attacking cities.
They went to all the museums and started taking artifacts out.
That was the first thing U.S. troops did in Iraq.
Not gauging war, they went and they took out all these old artifacts
from way back in the day in Iraq.
Where did you hear this?
I've studied it.
Why did they do that?
Because it's...
So there's this thing called eagle versus serpent, right?
And this is old, old, old knowledge.
The eagle represents overlooking power, control.
Like the eagle flies higher it's higher
it's looking down it's controlling everything that's what it symbolizes the serpent symbolizes
knowledge okay and over time they demonize the serpent and the snake so people would not look
into the snake and the snake isn't actually what the big thing is.
The snake basically is like a caterpillar that turns into a moth.
It becomes a dragon.
And that is the higher form.
That's a symbolization of the higher form of knowledge.
So that's the battle of everything.
When they say knowledge is power, knowledge is freedom,
that's what they're talking about.
The more you know, the more free you are. So it's's eagle and you'll see all these fucking flags with the eagle on because that is over
that is authoritarianism control the big brother and then the the the serpent which is like when
you go back to adam and eve the serpent came and gave them an apple it wasn't sin he gave them
knowledge and that's why they left the garden of eden but that's the big thing over time so um mesopotamia is this place where all
the sumerians were ancient ancient things and they had a time machine they uh basically stargate
where you could time travel through and that's what they say they went in there for
okay okay i want to talk about chicks. Let's talk about them. Yeah.
A lot of our questions will be about that.
First question we have from Brian.
I ruined this podcast.
I'm sorry.
Boom.
Clap, Stokers.
I'm speaking out in regards to a problem I've been having recently.
Whenever I'm drinking milk, I can't get the thought out of my mind that I'm drinking cow jizz, and it's degrading and disgusting.
How do I fix this and be able to enjoy milk again?
Because it's not jizz.
Right.
That's why.
I agree.
It's not from a dick.
It's from a nipple.
I was going to say just eat the cow, but that's better.
Maybe like jizz.
Yeah, maybe hide inside.
Why do we still drink milk?
We're the only mammals that do that.
I don't know.
How about that?
Stop drinking milk.
It tastes good.
Why do we drink it? Nobody else does it in their adult age. I don't know how about that stop it tastes good well it's why do we drink it nobody else does in their adult age i don't drink it but either unless it's in a milkshake
and then i i like it i like milkshakes i do please keep this anonymous hey big lifter jt and surf icon
chad i have quite the predicament on my hand sorry for the lengthy message but it's important
so i've been with my girl for a few years. We started dating in high school. We're at the same college now
We're super happy together, but I wouldn't have written in if everything was perfect before we started dating
I had a crush on one of her friends. I've been crushing since seventh grade
We've always been in contact and we're decent friends not super close though over the years
I go through times where I crush real hard and I'm going through one of those times right now
What do I do? I could 100% see myself marrying marrying my gf but i need to figure this situation out do i keep quiet for
the rest of my life do i tell my girlfriend and work it with work it out with her and likely not
be able to talk hang with my crush anymore do i leave my girlfriend and follow the girl who must
be my one true love thanks guys keep doing what you're doing what's your thought how old is this kid sounds like he's towards the end of
college yeah i would say don't tell your girlfriend that'd just be a weird yeah don't tell her yeah
that's just really gonna get in her head and yeah f with her without getting any positive out of it
you won't accomplish anything yeah lie they'll save you trouble. But also maybe you got to really minimize contact with this other person
so you don't let that get too out of control.
It seems like he's playing out a fantasy.
Yeah, have fun.
Do it while you can.
Are you saying do it?
Yeah.
Go for it?
But sleep with her friend?
No.
Or just jerk off to it.
But you can fantasize about it.
Right, yeah.
You can definitely masturbate to it. Yeah. So jerk off to it. But you can fantasize about it. Right. Yeah, you can definitely masturbate to it.
Yeah.
Just jerk off to it.
Yeah.
Listen.
Yeah.
It's interesting, dude.
It's just like, I don't want to give bad advice, but it's like, dude, you're young.
Have fun.
Go have fun.
Yeah.
Don't cheat on your girlfriend.
If you want to sleep with other people, break up with your girlfriend and go do it, man.
Right.
This is the time to do it.
I know everybody thinks forever it's going to last forever.
But once you hit 40, you become the invisible man to 20-year-old chicks.
So bang everything that moves.
I want to tell you guys a weird thing I heard yesterday.
Hit me.
Hit us.
If you're having a teethache, drink your pee.
Why?
You're talking to the right guys.
I'm telling you, man.
Supposedly, like like it's not um i
forget what someone's tell it's almost like pee is almost like um your teeth don't get enough
blood so there's like it's not that it's like um waste it's more like just body fluids and you
drink your your urine and it it soothes your teethache.
Dude, we had a health guy on, Troy.
He's like certified health nut in Venice.
And he does urine therapy where he drinks the middle stream, he said.
What's the middle stream?
Not the initial piss, not the last drips.
Oh, he lets it pee, throws down a shot, boom.
Yeah, his friend, who's also a health instructor,
posted on Instagram yesterday a photo of his face covered in blood, and then the caption said that it was the menstrual blood from his girlfriend.
O negative.
He told me what kind of blood it was.
Probably healthy did.
He's a healthy guy.
He looks great, but I have to wonder if he'd look the exact
same without applying the menstrual blood well you know it's like uh through uh big pharmaceuticals
we natural remedies have been just pushed away demonized and there's many things you do naturally
that you don't need any prescription to do uh yeah that's i like that episode a lot too because
holistic kind of medicine
gets kind of pushed to the side
because you can't make any money off that
there's no money in prevention
there's only money in fixing the problem
yeah well no not even fixing the problem
just having you be a patient
for the rest of your life
yeah
when is the last time they cured something
I wonder if
because my dad's a doctor
I don't think doctors
are that sinister but i just think that's sort of how it's set up just because it's for profit
listen your dad's probably a wonderful guy i'm not talking about him no i know i know yeah i'm
not talking about i asked my doctor if drinking your pee could help yeah and he was like no way
man and then another doctor confirmed that i've. I've asked like the last three doctors after.
But I think a lot of this holistic stuff, it like looks cool, but there's not much.
Drinking pee looks cool?
Like, I think, yeah, right.
That's a good point.
You're on Pornhub.
I think people are like, oh, it's natural.
Like it's piss.
It makes sense that we'd be healed by what we evacuate.
But I don't think there's much research into it.
Well, I mean, I'll tell you, man, you start looking into these holistic doctors.
They say they've cured cancer.
This one guy died after, say, cured AIDS.
He brought in the patients.
He was on trial.
He brought the patients in with their doctor.
And they're like, yeah, he cured me of AIDS.
And he got killed.
Oh, yeah, yeah.
That's what they do, man.
Aaron won't believe it, but they do, man.
They don't want. Aaron, I'm with you. Dude man they not aaron won't believe it but they do man they don't
want and dude you know i'm with you dude they have a cure for cancer in cuba oh they do yeah
they've been curing cancer for a long time in cuba but they don't have it here because there's too
much money in cancer and they want thin the herd as well so it's like it really sucks i mean dude you look at mexico the the holistic medicine that they're doing down there rehabs putting people on ayahuasca
and all that shit it's unbelievable all right we got another i'm sorry no yeah and it's just
living a healthy healthy lifestyle so you don't have to enter that system you know i think you know getting your discipline with your mind eating
right sleeping enough i do breathing exercises i love them working out working out just stay on
top of it what you do yeah yeah but getting the sun not too much but enough to get the vitamin d
hey dogs i'm in a newish relation about three months and i'm worried that all my boyfriend
wants to do is bone don't get me wrong i a good bone, but I feel like we don't know
each other as much as we should. I often find my stoke tank drained after we hang out because it
feels like we hook up to avoid talking. I really like the guy, but I want to go deeper.
Interesting. I think I've been, with my new girlfriend, I've been too horny. Like she got
a UTI and she was spending the night at my place.
And she's like, oh, I forgot to take my UTI pill.
So I was like, so does that mean it's going to be longer before we can bone again?
And she was like, yeah.
I was like, I'll drive to your place right now.
We'll go get that pill.
But I was so like intense about it that like even though I was offering something nice,
she was like really turned off.
She's like, we don't have to have sex.
And I was like, what?
And then it took me a while to be like, all right, I'm gripping it too tight.
It's a game you have to play, man. You you know you got to take care of them you got to show
them tension you got to listen to them you got to do all that stuff and if you're good at they give
you ass that's how it goes and they love it too yeah your boyfriend just needs to relax a little
bit and that'll turn you on a bit more have a conversation yeah listen it's interesting to be
interested yeah i mean you're always going to be able to
bone have a conversation then bone because she likes boning too i think the whole thing is that
girls don't like women love that stuff dude the big secret is that women have way more sex than
men think dude like i know a female comic not gonna say her name but she's like yeah sometimes
i'll bang three guys in a day like female comics are different, though. I wouldn't date any of them.
I think they're a little different in their sexual appetites
from what I've noticed from people who I've dated outside of comedy.
Really?
Yeah.
Maybe.
I just think women...
Maybe not.
Listen, Matt.
Imagine if you were in a place where the opposite sex wanted sex all the time.
You'd have sex all the time. You could because you like
it. That's women. They're constantly getting
hit on all the time and
they're wonderful not letting anybody know.
That's why drug dealers always get busted
because they're guys. They don't know how to smuggle
shit. Women know how to fucking
do a long con. My hot
gay guy friend Jared, like I went
to a gay bar with him. I was like, bro,
the amount that he got hit on, the amount of like sex that gay bar with him. I was like, bro, the amount that he got hit on,
the amount of sex that was available to him.
I was like, if I was gay-
There's no defense.
If I was gay, I'd never stop fucking.
And if I was handsome like Jared.
And guess what?
That's what they do.
They don't stop fucking.
Yeah.
They fuck all the time.
No, it's a lot of gay dudes
at the sex addict meetings I go to.
Oh, yeah.
I go to those too.
I go to-
You go to SAA?
I go to some-
We're not supposed to say.
Yeah, I talk about it.
I go to an AA meeting because it's SAA? I go to some. We're not supposed to say it. Yeah, I talk about it.
I go to an AA meeting because it's near my place.
It's all gay guys.
And it's the most honest meeting I've ever been at.
I pray that people have, they can find somewhere where they can be as brutally honest as these guys have let me be.
How long have you been sober?
I now have 150 days.
In AA? I've had five now have 150 days. In AA?
I've had five years at one point.
In AA?
Yeah, I don't drink.
I used to do coke.
I don't do that anymore.
And I'm weaning myself off everything.
Yeah, right?
It's a little bit like whack-a-mole.
You get rid of one and then another thing kind of slides in.
Yeah.
All my hobbies are felonies pretty much.
So that's what I shine at now i can't do
them anymore so i'm a boring person well i don't know if you want this on the pod we can edit it
out but the crack story oh yeah the time i smoked crack with that guy that's so funny what happened
so i just moved to la and um i was just walking around la the first day i was in town and uh i
saw the silver robot guy that's in the on on hollywood
boulevard and he's dancing he just stops and he looks at me goes dude you're gonna be a star i'm
like fuck yeah i've had guys say that to me in la too right yeah so i go back to my week i go back
to this apartment i lived in it was a weekly and on the floor with like shady people and i go to my
i go to my door to unlock my apartment i look down the hall who's their silver robot guy
he's on my floor i'm like holy shit hall. Who's there? Silver Robot guy is on my floor.
I'm like, holy shit, Silver Robot.
What's up, buddy?
He starts breakdancing right there because he's like Daniel Day-Lewis of Crazy People, right?
Always in character.
So I'm like, what are you getting into?
He's like, hey, man, you want to come hang out?
I'm like, fuck yeah, dude.
So I walk down and go in his room.
It's messy as fuck.
But for the next like half an hour, he just breakdanced for me.
I'm like, yeah, go.
Go, Robot. Go, Robot. You're fucking great. So after half an hour he just breakdanced for me i'm like yeah go go robot
go robot you're fucking great so after half an hour i'm like bored he goes i go hey man what do
you want to do now he goes i don't know man you want to um smoke some crack i go what he goes i
got crack i go i don't do crack i did coke so then i smoked crack with him for like two hours right
we just smoked crack and uh so after two hours, I'm cracked out of my skull.
And I go, Hey, robot, I'm bored. He goes, I don't know, man. Why don't you let me suck your dick?
How about that one? I go, why? He goes, Hey, dude, don't you don't smoke my crack and not let me suck that dick. I go, dude, you didn't tell me there was a second part of this plan,
man. We were just going to do smoke crack and do crackhead shit. And he tried to jump me. I
punched him and I ran down my apartment. There's so many stories like that in the program too you know what's so funny
about aa you have a story you ever go to na meetings no i never you're just another motherfucker
i mean that is the gnarliest of gnarly they have great i love doing na comedy shows like they'll
be like hey you want to come do an na mean do stamp fuck yeah
dude they shot heroin in their dick are they gonna get offended by fucking jokes no it's great you
can t off they laugh at everything they're uh yeah they're so honest too yeah i performed at a
rehab facility and the people are you realize that like a lot of people who are in rehab aren't like
they're not bad people they're very like sensitive sensitive people. Well, dude, it's like, why are street drugs bad and pharmaceutical drugs good?
Right.
Why are drugs a felony?
Who are you hurting?
You're hurting yourself.
Now, if I go steal something or I go mug somebody for, that's a crime.
That's stealing.
Okay.
But I'm doing drugs myself.
I can stop doing drugs.
I've done it.
I've stopped, you know, i used to fucking do a lot
coke i don't do it anymore but i can never stop being a felony and it's just meant to get to keep
you in the system in the system in the system do you mind me asking what preceded your last relapse
i mean i i just i get in my head all the time so i smoked weed okay so that was you didn't like
go into like a binge or anything? No, no, no.
No, no, no.
But you had to reset your time?
Yeah.
And so you were distressed
and that was it?
Well, my head,
I can't turn my head off.
I'm the same way.
You'll see me,
I talk to myself all day.
Me too.
I never write jokes.
I've never written a joke.
Do you think you're-
I talk to myself all day.
Do you think it's manic?
No.
It's just your chemistry.
It's just my chemistry.
I'm not bipolar.
I'm not, you know, I'm just, I have an active brain.
That's your frequency.
And that's, you know, I got on like Ritalin or Adderall for a second.
My brain, like, I'm like, fuck that.
I like being crazy.
Right.
That's who I am.
What does weed do for you?
It makes me paranoid.
I want to beat off the whole time.
So I just sit staring at the door like,
the fucking CIA is coming.
That's exactly what weed does for me.
And I enjoy that.
Yeah, I enjoy the paranoia.
I enjoy the intensity of it.
I kind of like questioning everything.
But I'm very agitated when I do it.
I don't like to hide.
I used to like to drink.
And then at the comedy store,
there was a lot of coke at one point. So you know at the comedy store there was a lot of coke
at one point so i was doing that and there was a lot of coke and fucking and but now it's like i
want it's like i'm an old man i don't want to do it anymore i just want to go get go home sleep
was there anyone who's was sort of like a mentor to you when you first started that where you're
just like or someone that inspired you a bunch that you kind of wanted to be around um pablo francisco
was a big um a big big well bill hicks was big you knew bill bill hicks no but like when i started
he was he was a big thing so inspiration yeah he kind of how he like how he went hard in the
paint on that shit richard pryor sam kenson you know uh and Dice Clay, Eddie Murphy. I loved all that raw shit.
I loved real shit.
So I started in Las Vegas,
and they had only one open mic every other week in the entire city.
There was one open mic.
So I'm like, fuck it.
I'm going to start my own thing.
So I basically started the L.A. comedy scene.
I had the Las Vegas comedy scene i had an open the las vegas comedy scene there was nothing they
would the local comedy clubs wouldn't let locals play there so we had to make our own thing so i
literally had a comedy show every night in a bar at a different bar then uh i have my own improv
troupe and a bunch of casinos so that's that's how i did i've been producing comedy since like 93
and that's kind of why i do it at been producing comedy since like 93. That's cool.
And that's kind of why I do it at the store.
I've always been producing.
So I've always had to produce my own thing.
And I come from Vegas and they're super raw up there.
Super raw.
All right, we got another question.
Yo, what's up, guys?
Big fan of the pod.
For this question, I'd like to stay anonymous.
Okay, here it is.
I am a senior in high school and I get super nervous before I hook up with a girl,
especially at parties.
I don't have trouble with the steps leading up to hooking up, like flirting with a girl, creating that attraction. I can through it too. And just fucking be a G, dude. Believe in yourself. No means no. get shot down i still get in my head and overthink stuff he needs not dude just know she's going
through too and just fucking be a g dude believe in yourself no means no she doesn't want it stop
but just be confident and go in it's good enough yeah give her some smooches you can do this yeah
dude and you're gonna kiss a little goofy that's okay something sniff her armpits that's the shit
you ever sniff armpits maybe Maybe build up to that.
Have you?
It's so good.
Yeah.
I licked my girlfriend's armpit last night. I'm pretty gross.
I get in there.
You get into the armpit?
Oh, I mean, I get all over.
Oh, yeah.
Are you an ass-eating superstar?
You know it.
Yeah, dude.
All right.
This is the last question we got.
This stoker wrote in on the Instagram.
He said, I accidentally flooded my dorm building when I touched one of the fire sprinklers,
not knowing that they go off extremely easily.
Everyone had to be moved out for the week.
The school released an article in their newspaper a few days after the fact with my name,
making me sound like I planned a premeditated thing.
I've already faced consequences from the school, but I feel pretty bad about.
Besides some of the dorm dudes being pissed at me, I can't even go to get coffee
without people I don't even know
staring and pointing at me.
I'm trying to stay positive,
but it kind of blows that everyone assumes
I'm super schmole,
that I'm some super schmole
that ruins the dorms and stuff.
That probably sounds pretty jumbled.
I tried to fit the different stages
of what's going on
and short as message as I could.
I think you did a good job
of describing the events.
Here's what I've learned about life.
Nobody's thinking about you, dude.
When you learn that,
it's a very blessing.
Nobody's thinking.
Those people are all
white knuckling their life,
trying to get through their shit.
It seems like they're looking over you.
Yeah, they're like,
that's the guy who pulled it.
At the end of the day,
nobody's going to remember it.
By this time next year,
nobody's going to give a fuck.
Yeah.
Don't sweat it.
They're not, dude, I'm telling you, man, nobody's thinking about you.
Everybody's dealing with their own bullshit and trying to survive.
And if someone's treating you like shit, they're probably treating everybody like shit.
And it will all come out in the wash.
Be a nice person.
Admit, hey, dude, yeah, it went weird.
Fuck it.
I don't know what happened.
And you'll be fine, dude.
Yeah, it's just another part of
his story and dude you're supposed to fuck him yeah i think i think in the long run it'll be a
funny thing that it happened yeah yeah and i don't think you're not a schmole because you didn't do
it on purpose and that'll be figured out over time people will realize that you're not like
someone who does stuff like that yeah time will heal yeah dude sam thank you so much for i feel like i tanked it no that's
great you crushed got deep it got everyone everyone's gonna be i love both you guys i
think you guys are doing such great things oh thank you thank you man what you're doing right
now is only the beginning thank you and it's only gonna grow you guys are super creative you guys
get the internet and uh you built your own
pirate ship and you're going to be doing amazing things and you know things will happen that you
want to happen when it's time for it to happen until then just enjoy the ride dude yeah paul
mooney told me that when i was young it's like dude the time you're running around just doing
gigs that's the fun stuff when everything's a check that becomes work and it changes everything yeah dude paul mooney j i'm a i'm a regular at the comedy store because
of paul mooney oh that's oh yeah i've heard that story sat down with uh mitzi and told her to make
me a regular without him i wouldn't probably wouldn't be there i love you guys i think you're
the best i love you too i'm gonna go to the bathroom but do you want to do a yeah yeah
sounds good dude sam thank you so much i I love you, bud. Dude, I love you too.
No, it was awesome.
Let's go, poops.
Thank you.
You guys are the best.
Aaron, can you let me know about that 2 o'clock?
It's a really big guest.
All right?
What's up, Stokers?
Hope you enjoyed the ride so far.
It's just me, Chad, right now.
JT is draining his one-eyed snake,
and it's really going to let loose because we just had a green juice man so much stuff to think about but the only thing I can
think about right now is green juice you know why why did the universe choose green you know
some may say it's because of chlorophyll.
But I think there's a higher thing there.
It's like, you know what?
Green is going to be it.
That's going to be the thing that gives you vitality.
That's going to be the thing that makes you want to just freaking eat and then drink.
You want to eat and drink green if you want to have huge biceps like Popeye.
And then you want to just, you know just hop on a ship and steer it.
Because that's what human beings are meant to do.
They're meant to get on these vessels, go onto the ocean, and steer.
And just navigate the waters and then find something epic and gnarly like south america or
north america what up dude my dog jt just drained his dragon yes sir how'd it go it was nice man
nice that was a whirlwind that was great yeah He fucking cracks me up.
Yeah.
All right.
Chad, who is your beef of the week?
My beef of the week is with Dairy Queen.
What up, Dairy Queen?
I usually love you, but I'm beefing with you right now.
So we were in a show in San Diego last night.
On the way back, I wanted to get a Blizzard.
It closed early, so I didn't.
So I'd like to extend a sincere fuck
you to the dairy queen and san juan capistrano you're my beef because i didn't get to have a
blizzard after the show that's it who's your beef my beef of the week is with a game of thrones
whoa yeah i watched the recently super hyped episode battle for winterfell this i'm talking
about it the th Thursday after it aired.
And I have to say I was underwhelmed by it.
And I couldn't say it in the moment
because I was with a lot of people at a viewing party
who very much enjoyed it.
And I didn't want to be the pee in the Cheerios,
but these are my genuine feelings.
I think Game of Thrones has kind of lost its way.
Since they got past where the books were,
they lost a lot of the meticulous storytelling,
the logistical realism. I know it's not not realistic but they were much better like when it when people
traveled it felt like it took actual time for them to travel now they just jump to a new part
of the globe and uh with like nary a scene between and i think the thing that they're really lacking
now is that they're just not as ruthless as they were at the beginning of the show.
They would make you fall in love with a hero and you're so accustomed to the
hero winning that you just expect them to always be there.
And then they would fucking take his head off without a second's notice.
And you were like,
holy shit,
this is real.
Like the real game of Thrones is brutal.
And now it feels like it's set up too much to just make the fans happy.
And it's just playing to the audience. Yeah. And it's good guys versus bad guys. And it feels like it's set up too much to just make the fans happy. And it's just playing to the audience.
Yeah.
And it's good guys versus bad guys.
And it's like, we know you want this good guy to have this heroic moment.
So we're going to give it to them.
Yeah.
And they used to not give that to us.
Yeah.
And I think that it was just a better Game of Thrones.
And now there's so much about like, this is the biggest episode ever.
Like you thought Battle of the Bastards was big.
You thought Blackwater was big.
This is going to be even bigger. And I just don't know if that's even where the show thrives is in creating the bastards was big. You thought, um, Blackwater was big. This is going to be even bigger.
And I just don't know if that's even where the show thrives is in creating the biggest battle scenes.
Like I've seen bigger battle scenes.
It felt like in Braveheart.
Yeah.
What made game of Thrones good.
Wasn't that.
And I go ahead.
No.
And I just feel like it's good,
but it kind of reminds me of breaking bad where it gets to the last season.
And they're so worried about just making us happy and serving this big beast
that they kind of stop making hard artistic choices.
We got your foot on our neck and then you just crack it down.
Yeah.
Like the end of Sicario.
It seems like what's cool about that show.
I mean, I watched the first two seasons and I lost HBO.
So I lost my way with GOT.
But I watched The Red Wedding.
Dude. That's what I I watched The Red Wedding dude
that's what I mean
The Red Wedding was dank
and you know what
there's a couple episodes
left in the season
so maybe that's coming
but this big battle episode
just didn't do it for me
and either did The Night King
as a villain
yeah
I never understood who he was
I wanted an episode with him
yeah
I just
I was never as afraid of him
or as in awe of him
as I was of like
Tywin Lannister
yeah
yeah I think what's cool are the
the mind games and the the the basic the the maneuvering the cunning yeah like peter dinklage
yes and like all those other people of how they they're able to use the power of persuasion to
get there what they want that's that's cool to me and i think a lot of that stuff is gone because
they don't have the books anymore
for source material.
Yeah.
Where you're taking this huge source material
and you're paring it down.
Now they're just kind of like,
I know he's still helping,
but it feels more concocted.
Yeah.
And then,
what was I going to say?
Fuck.
Oh, and then like another thing
that I thought they missed out on
was that like Daenerys and Jon,
now that what we know about Jon,
I don't want to do any spoilers,
but the reality of who
deserves the throne can legitimately be called into question now. And they both have their own
armies and they're fighting a mutual enemy. But I thought they should be arguing between them over
whose army should suffer more losses. Because then in the aftermath of that, who's ever got
the bigger army is going to have more claim to the throne. But none of that three-dimensional
thinking was in the episode. The planning for their fight battle was so dumb i was like none of these
people should be on the throne they're all dumb they're bad at their jobs yeah all right that's
my beef of the week nice chad who is your babe of the week my babe of the week is uh amy driscoll amy driscoll what up she reached out to us um yes amy she's let's go she's
in a battle uh against cystic fibrosis um she's currently awaiting her second double lung
transplant whoa in north carolina so huge operation but you got this she has to go through a pulmonary
rehab workout program every day to keep her body in good shape for the transplant.
She wears her Stoke shirt and listens to the podcast while she's there.
She's making sure her Stoke tank is always full so she can crush gym time.
So I just want to give her major props for it.
She's got this big double lung transplant coming up,
but she's maintaining high levels of Stoke, and she's in the fight,
and she's just like, you know what?
I have this huge thing looming, but I love it.
I love the ride.
I love life still.
I'm stoked.
I'm amped.
And I just want to give her major props.
That's how we got to live life.
We love you.
And she says, I'm living proof that anything is possible
when you fight for it for sure
she encourages everyone to be a registered organ donor and uh you can follow her story
at amy's cause.org that's a-i-m-e-e-s-c-a-u-s-e.org so stokers check out her story uh amy you're our
babe of the week anything you want to say it means a lot to us that you wrote in and that you're sharing your journey with us
yeah thank you yeah you're in a babe and a legend
who's your babe my babe of the week is fausta um i don't want to be gauche but i had two nannies
growing up amelda and fausta i already already shouted out Imelda who used to drive
me home from school and let me flash my dong out the window. And actually my butt, just my butt,
sorry, I overstated. But Fausta was my other nanny and she's the fucking greatest. She's so sweet.
We had a nice conversation yesterday. I hung out for a while and I just realized like,
she's basically like a mother to me. Like we've just been through so much together and like,
I got to tell her good news about us.
I think yesterday was the best day of my life.
Yeah?
Yeah.
Nice.
Because I woke up at my GF's place.
We snuggled.
Then she moved my car for me because it was illegally parked.
And where she moved it, I still got a ticket,
but it was cute that she tried.
Sorry, babe, I had to burn you.
Then me and Chad had a really exciting uh
Chad goes deep meeting with someone that we could add to the team uh behind the camera and then um
then I went down to San Clemente and I hung out with my moms and hung out with Fausta
and we just had a nice talk and she's the best and then um and then we had a stand-up show in
Encinitas and I ran and I came and uh I read and then we had a show in Encinitas. And I ran, and I came, and I read.
And then we had a show in Encinitas.
And Encinitas, we had so many fans, and they were the fucking best.
They were so cool.
And then we both had good sets, and then we drove home together.
It was fun.
It was a good day.
It was a good day.
I had In-N-Out, Flying Dutchman.
Maybe the best day of my life.
You had three, right?
Yeah, I had three today, too.
It was a great day i got a problem but faust you're my babe of the week because you're just
fucking awesome and funny and hilarious and just such a solid figure in my life and provided so
much stability for me through my high school years and i'm i'm uh so lucky that i i you know
get to kick it with you still so love you fausta what up fausta all right dude who's your
legend of the week my legend is alex p alex p what up you guys may know him from uh my spring
break in cavo stories he and i were just two soldiers in the fight you know we fought and
we raged harder than ever chocolate chocolate combaca baby that's what we got after we got
those uh adios motherfuckers in a freaking pitcher.
And, dude, we both woke up hungover.
But we powered through, and we raged as hard as we could.
And he came to the show last night.
Wanted to give him a big shout-out.
And his brother, Andrew, what up?
And the rest of his squad.
Thank you guys for coming out.
And he's expecting a kid.
He just had one, I thought.
No, it's, like, coming in, like, two months.
Oh, that's what he was saying. In one, I thought. No, it's like coming in like two months.
Oh, that's what he was saying.
In eight weeks.
Yeah. Okay, nice.
So, dude, major congratulations on that.
Stoked to meet the little one.
That's going to be amazing.
And stoked you're living it up in San Diego, my dog.
Chad, what is your quote of the week?
You know, I forgot to do a quote.
Dude, my quotes are a little rough.
So I had one quote that I was going to do of Anthony Jeselnik on the Joe Rogan podcast
saying that men aren't evil.
Men who do evil simply mistook it for happiness.
And I was like, oh, that's so true.
Like people just do bad shit because they think it'll make them feel better.
But then I heard Yuval Harari on Mark Zuckerberg's podcast. We were going to talk about that. I think we uh, Yuval Harari on Mark Zuckerberg's podcast.
We were going to talk about that. I think we touched on it. So boring. Mark Zuckerberg's
podcast is so boring, but Yuval Harari said, let's not forget that some of the people with
the highest self-esteem have done some of the worst things in human history. And I was like,
oh man, maybe I'm wrong. Maybe some people do evil and they just don't care. Chad, what is your quote of the week?
You know, we both listened to the Mark Zuckerberg podcast.
Yep.
I didn't understand it at all.
You listened to a different episode too.
The one on law?
They're just talking, you know, and I'm we just can you just tell me if you guys are
watching me watch porn or not right um there is there is a feeling like mark isn't there a lot
more interesting stuff you could be addressing yeah but i thought i'd go with this quote because
it's the first episode mark's like he's like i challenge. I challenge myself to write AI or learn Mandarin.
And then this year I'm doing a podcast.
And I'm like, you know what?
Your nerd jargon is bugging me.
And the fact that you chose to learn Mandarin seems kind of pretentious to me.
Or write AI.
But I like the core message there.
Yeah, of get after it.
Of challenge yourself.
So that's my quote. No quote no dude like the picture of him
that they use for the podcast you're like mark like i don't want to go low hanging fruit here
but it's like one of the nerdiest photos i've ever seen like you couldn't get a photo of yourself
picture yeah and it's just so boring yeah he just He just is not a dynamic speaker at all.
He does a lot of like ums and shit.
He's like um, and I think I'd like to unpack that in two general directions.
I think for one, you can separate the systems of social media from, you know, AI.
And then you're like, snooze alert, dude.
You know what they should do?
I just had this idea.
Yeah.
They should get like cool translators they don't need someone to translate you know like a different language
although it is when i hear them talk i'm like this is kind of a foreign language but they should have
like people like us to be like to translate for them yeah you know to be like all right dude so
yeah we're not really stoked on, um, this
coding. So we're going to go with encryption. Encryption is basically like, you know, if you're
trying to get into the beach, but it's private. And so, you know, you're blocked off by David
Duchovny's like private gate. Imagine if the podcast sounded like that, people like, yes,
tech. I love it. Yeah. If, if, if your message isn't getting across, maybe you're not communicating it effectively.
Yeah.
Try using different words.
Have some solid dudes like us translate what you're saying.
Fuck yeah, dude.
I'm down.
All right, dude.
That's it.
That's it for episode 69.
I'm going deep in chat, JT.
Thank you guys so much for tuning in.
Thank you to San Tripoli check out his podcast
tinfoil hat
and you can check him out on
Instagram let's see what
it is
it's just Sam Tripoli
so yeah thank you guys
thank you Sam for coming on and JT
what up thank you for doing
for being an integral part of the being the second half of this pod i don't know i don't
know why i was thanking you i was like thank you for doing them i'm like you're you are the pod
no you're the pod yeah we do thank you for uh we do do it for uh mind melding with your high yeah samski for uh
siamese twinning me on the does that make sense yeah i'm happy to be an extra head on your body
yeah i mean that you too yeah These guys are really nice
You wanna know
What to do
Where to go
When you need someone to guide you
Just have them throw these signs
You're going free
You're going free Seems to have the throat beside you Going deep
Going deep
Let's get deep
I'm going deep
I'm getting deep