Going Deep with Chad and JT - Ep. 79 - Uncle Joe Joins, Prank Calls, Crossfit Gym Names
Episode Date: July 10, 2019What up stokers, in this very special episode we have Uncle Joe joining in to bring his no-nonsense charisma, a few call-ins, and some epic prank calls to our buddies! It's truly dank so tune in.... Check out our t shirts at www.chadgoesdeep.com!
Transcript
Discussion (0)
What's your theme?
Goin' deep
Chad and JT podcast. Coming to you live with episode 78?
Nine?
Something.
We're up there, dude.
You guys should know the number.
Nah, dude.
I don't care about numbers.
I'm here with my compadre, John Thomas.
What up?
What up, dudes?
Boom, clap.
We're here with the hog master himself, the master of dong, and the master of stoicism,
Joe Morisi.
What up?
Hey, what's up?
Thanks for having me.
It's been a while since I've been on.
You guys have been big time in me, and it's good to be back.
Oh, man.
Dude, coming in firing.
Were you holding that in for a while?
No, I just, you know know i've been busy it's
okay um uh i was just talking to your girlfriend actually where uh on instagram oh really yeah
nice what did you guys talk about i was hoping you would ask um she asked me uh if i was working
saturday and i am she's coming to the comedy store with uh
a friend oh nice yeah and then i accidentally hit the video chat button
you dog um do you guys video no she didn't pick up you which is kind of insulting yeah um i don't
know why i have like i have like a nervousness in my body i'm happy you guys are chumming it up
but i'm but it scares me a little bit.
Yeah, it was an accident.
I guess the idea of another guy FaceTiming my girlfriend, I'm like, what's going on here?
Yeah.
That's why I keep the phone.
But if it stays in my pocket, it's too.
Did you let the phone ring?
Or did you like notice and then you hung up right away?
I saw it said connecting and then I tried to minimize it.
Oh, you didn't mean to do it?
Yeah, I didn't mean to do it.
I'm not going to video chat your girlfriend.
Well, I wasn't sure, but I mean, like, if you guys are getting along good, it's good.
I want you guys to be tight.
I mean, I always ask you.
I'm like, you like her, right?
Yeah.
Yeah, stop asking me that.
Yeah, and then, no, but I'm not going to video chat her.
It was an accident.
I gave a ha-ha-ha.
Yeah, I told her to go to the store on saturday
because i because she was thinking about going on like monday or sunday i said saturday would
be better well monday's a good night too sunday no i i would yeah i'd go are you going pretty
much every night any night except wednesday or sunday is good i don't think so wednesday oh
we're gonna be gone yeah, I'm gone.
Oh, yeah.
Yeah, I'm going to be in San Francisco.
I know.
My phone's blowing up.
I know.
I'm getting a lot of calls.
Today's the call-in episode, so Stokers are calling in right now.
Calling in a lot.
Yeah.
Well, sweet, dudes.
Good to have you on, Joe.
How are things going?
Things are going good. I've stopped eating late at night. Joe. How are things going? Things are going good.
I've stopped eating late at night.
Yeah, how's that going?
Are you able to maintain that discipline?
Yeah.
Yeah, because I don't like...
Because when I gain weight, it all goes here.
The jowls.
I look like a snake swallowing a mouse.
That's where my weight goes, too.
It just goes here.
It's gross.
I can't look at that
shit when you look puffy yeah you know are you doing 10 minute abs now instead of five
uh i was doing eight oh eight minute abs yeah that's a good number yeah there's no five minute
abs yeah there's that famous uh something Mary. Yeah, it's seven.
I got another idea.
Seven-minute abs.
Oh, I remember that.
Yeah.
No, I just do a lot of cardio.
I'm only doing eight-minute abs like one day a week now.
Dude, there's something about Mary.
One of my first memories of childhood was watching that with my siblings
and the part where he zips up his dong in his zipper
and then the ambulance comes to unzip it.
And they're like, all right, one, two.
We got a bleeder!
Yeah.
Yeah.
That was a fun cut.
Yeah, that was good stuff.
Ben Stiller's so funny in that movie.
He's so good.
And then Matt Dillon, the big chompers yeah guys my uh one line
in something about mary that i love the most he's um arguing with norm the pizza delivery guy
and then he's like he's like um norm's like oh you think mary's really gonna fall for you some
guy who like farts laughs at smelling his own farts and then matt dylan goes
you were following us
yeah matt dylan's really funny in that yeah dude the way you even like to shake that thing like
even the rice-a-roni line yeah you said where does he say he's going to what city i'm moving to miami
yeah miami i work for Rice and Roney.
For Rice and Roney.
Isn't that the San Francisco tree?
Yeah, Rice and Roney.
Isn't that the San Francisco tree? That's awesome.
Yeah, they're expanding.
Dude, my brother needs a name for his CrossFit team.
Yeah.
And I thought maybe we could brainstorm some ideas.
What?
Yeah.
It's him and two other dudes.
They're going to lift heavy.
How about the lame asses
no that's not gonna work what about the i'll let him know what about the squat squadron squat
squadron i said joe rogan sauna oh i like that how about the lightweight elk meat what the
lightweights yeah like throw off your competitors yeah the squat squadron you said yeah the disciples
of the or deadlift disciples
I said Moby Huge
I said Brad Pitt's tan
And my brother's like
What does that mean?
Why Brad Pitt's tan?
I'm like
Cause it's inspiring
Yeah it's pretty funny actually
Yeah
Take that Bill
It's actually funny Or Brad Pitt's hair take that, Bill. It's actually funny.
Or Brad Pitt's hair.
Brad Pitt's jawline.
Brad Pitt.
We just only send Brad Pitt.
I think just call the team Brad Pitt.
Yeah, just Brad Pitt.
That's pretty good.
My struggle.
My struggle.
Not a Hitler reference.
Reference to this book by Karl of Norsberg.
Norsgaard.
Sorry, dude.
I was thinking maybe like elk meat, bacon wrapped sausage.
Stuffing.
Sweet potato.
You got blue on your... Thanksgiving dinner i got blue on me from the
blue drink yeah um what i mean what is it what is a crossfit team you know it's a group of guys
and gals who are jacked and love moving heavy stuff yeah on their but and their time off. Maybe the getting after it's.
Yeah, but you got to send a message to your opponent.
So I'm like, you know, I was in the shower just brainstorming.
I'm like, you know what?
Like if they sent like a message like, oh, these guys are like, you know, like if they went with a name like Compassionate Dudes,
that would sort of make the other team underestimate them.
Wait, there's competitions?
Yeah, I like that. Compassionate Dudes or the other team underestimate them. Wait, there's competitions? Yeah, I like that.
Compassionate dudes or the tank destructors?
I thought CrossFit was just like a training thing.
I didn't know you could compete.
Oh, yeah, there's the CrossFit Olympics and shit.
Oh, yeah, I feel like I've heard of that.
I went to it in San Diego.
My buddy Ferraro competed.
So badass, dude.
I was going to tell my brother Joe's hog,
but I don't think Joe's hog is famous enough yet.
Well, give it a run.
Tell him to workshop it.
Would you want people to name their CrossFit teams after your dick?
I don't think so.
Would you want them to name them after you in general?
Yeah, they could do that.
I'm going to lift dead lifts like joe does laundry yeah yeah if i could be an inspiration that'd be cool what about household chores for their name
i like that yeah lateral raises squats deadl. I'm just circling the wagon again.
Is that a...
Are you allowed to say circling the wagon?
Heavy guitar riffs.
What do you mean, are you allowed?
Who can offend the people of the Oregon Trail?
I don't think I said Oregon.
Right.
I don't know I said Oregon. Right. I don't know what you mean.
I was, like, nervous that maybe, like, circling the wagon was something that, like, US soldiers used to do to, like, Native Americans or something.
I don't know.
I think you're right.
I did also P. Diddy's Yacht. I think you're right. All right.
I did also P. Diddy's Yacht.
I like that.
Yeah, that's good stuff.
All right.
Thanks, dudes.
I'm going to send this their way.
Maybe like Team of Rivals.
Team of Rivals.
Checks and Balances. It's not bad. checks and balances.
It's not bad.
Synergy.
My dad's nuts.
What about my dad's nuts?
Warren Buffett's foresight.
Warren Buffett's investment team. Warren Buffett's investment team.
Warren Buffett's advisors.
LaDainian Tomlinson's training staff.
That's what we do.
I think you got a lot of suggestions.
Dude, I was thinking about this too. What would be your guys' death row meal?
Like you need to get one meal of your choosing before they kill you what would you go people keep asking me that
did you ask me that recently no that's a good question why is that a topic of conversation
i thought of it because i was like i've been so into my diet lately i was like would my last meal
still be keto you gotta stick with it yeah no because i don't want to feel all foggy and like
kind of bloated when they uh yeah you don't want to feel bad about yourself when you're getting
electrocuted yeah you don't no i want to be like all right later dudes yeah like you're amped yeah
exactly and then after they'll be like man maybe we shouldn't have killed jt he was like kind of a
he had good energy.
And I think if you're amped enough, they can't kill you.
Yeah, dude.
You just are electricity and it just runs through your body.
That's real.
Yeah, there you go.
That's real.
They lethally inject you and you just fucking take a nice nap and you wake up and then you escape and you move to Florida Keys.
I heard when they were going to execute Ted Bundy, the executioner was really struggling.
He's like, he's so charismatic.
Right.
And they're like, don't forget what he did.
And he's like, all right, fine.
Just plunged himself.
Yeah.
We were talking about executioners last week, too.
It's a heavy topic.
Yeah, it deserves to be considered in more than one episode.
Joe, what else is up, dog?
How you been, dog?
How you been, man?
Pretty good.
Did my hair in the bathroom.
What's going on in the home front?
Do you not do your hair in the bathroom usually?
No, I mean here.
Oh, nice.
Yeah, it looks good.
Have you had any big developments at the apartment lately?
We saw Joe in the future today. Yeah, that was funny. Have we had any big developments at the apartment lately? We saw Joe in the future today.
Yeah, that was funny. There was this 85-year-old guy outside just sitting in a walker,
just watching guys do construction on his building,
and he was just watching them from three feet away.
Yeah, it was hilarious.
Took a picture of the guy.
And Joe sees him, and Joe goes, that's me in 50 years.
Which is what I had been thinking too.
Yeah, just monitoring what's going on.
I sent it to the group chat.
Of everyone in our building, you're probably closest with the landlord and building owner, Ilya.
Yeah, probably.
Who's in the group chat?
There's some different comics.
Um, alright.
I've heard you call yourself
Ilya's Eyes and Ears.
Well, I like to be
on guard, you know.
We got some new cute neighbors.
That's exciting.
Oh, you do?
Yeah.
Yeah, they are, but they're, you know.
They're what?
A little young.
Yeah.
How young?
They're like...
I think like barely 21, 22.
It's too young.
Do I sound like a creep?
No.
All right.
Kind of. No. All right.
Kind of.
No.
Damn it.
You're a creep, dude.
Well, the guys who lived there before were like the most evil,
was one of the most evil guys I had ever met. Yeah, these girls, I got to say, brought a fresh young energy.
They have a cat.
That just walks around and is kind of nice to pet and stuff.
Yeah, well, I'm not going to touch him because he wanders around outside. Right. energy they have a cat that just walks around and it's kind of nice to pet yeah it's kind of well
i'm not going to touch him because he wanders around outside so right but yeah but yeah if you
want to touch him and get his germ dude i got a post-it on my door from our neighbor it's like
please don't slam the door i'm like i see you like multiple times a day No I agree with that though There's too much slamming of doors
I don't really slam the door
You do that a lot
I slam the door a lot?
Yeah it's just when you're leaving
Just close the door
Don't throw the door and walk out
Like you have a second
You're right I do
Just close it
You're talking about the front door?
The gate one?
Because I'm a bad at it
Yeah the metal one
I mean I come out like,
Can't stop addicted to the shindig.
That Red Hot Chili Pepper song is just blasting in my head.
Like, I shouldn't hear that screen door slam from my bed.
You hear the back door when I leave?
No, the front metal door.
The front gate door, right.
I do slam the fuck out of that thing.
And that's probably, and Greg's even closer to it.
Dude, maybe I'll just respond to the post and just be like, I'm busy.
Yeah.
You know?
But I would just tell him.
Yeah.
I would just say, hey, yeah.
If you don't have time to close the door nice, you must be on the run a lot.
Yeah, that's what I was just saying.
Or on the go, not on the run.
You're not a fugitive.
All right, guys. Today we're doing a call-in episode,
so we're going to take some calls from
some stokers and see what they
want to chat about.
Sounds fun.
Hello?
No, no, no, don't worry about it.
Hello?
Aaron, will this play on the
recording that people get?
Oh, okay.
Even though I can't hear it out loud?
You can hear it on the headphones.
Yeah.
Hey, man, what's up?
Welcome to Going Deep with Chad and JT.
What's up, dude?
Hey, what up, dude?
I'm a huge, huge stoker here, so how you guys doing?
Good.
Good.
You got Joe here, too.
Hey, man, what's up?
Oh, Joe, what's going on, bro? doing good good what's happening all right so uh should i just answer the question yeah please dive in
all right so uh here here we go so i'm actually at a prom right now just one of my family friends
i asked him to go last night because she couldn't find a date.
I just met a lot of people that I just don't know,
not looking forward to it.
So I'm just looking for
your guys' advice
on how to, you know,
mingle a little bit,
get some good convos,
and maybe have a good time
instead of what I'm expecting.
At this prom?
Yeah, this prom
with my parents,
my friends, and it's their daughter
and they asked she she asked me to go that's kind of forced into it you know here's what i would do
i would um come in chill super chill like i don't think i'd talk for like the first 45 minutes
just shake hands say hello to everybody get kind of a lay of the land. Then once you've kind of made out who everybody is in the group,
you see what roles they fill, kind of what their interests are
and what kind of conversation they like to have,
you start going at them one at a time.
Like when there's slow moments and they're off by themselves,
you go up, you start chatting to them,
you find out what they're interested in, you talk for a couple minutes,
and then you keep it moving.
And then I think from there you'll have built a nice foundation,
and then it'll just be smooth sailing.
All right, for sure, for sure.
I'd like to propose another tactic, if I may.
I'm thinking, dude, you've got to make your presence known,
and you've got to make it infectious, so you go straight for that dance floor,
and you rip it up.
Did you hit that dance floor?
Yeah.
That's my plan. We can go with that. Just rip it up. You and you rip it up. Did you hit that dance floor? Yeah. That's my, honestly, that was my plan.
We can go with that.
Just rip it up.
You know, tear it up.
For sure, for sure.
Get it going.
Everyone remembers the first guy who starts dancing
and gets everyone moving.
And you could be that guy.
This is a huge moment for you.
You think?
Yeah.
You know what?
I think you're right, Chad.
Yeah.
Take this moment and grab it by Joe's balls.
Nice.
I mean, I would say be the silent observer, like how JT said,
but you got to go with what your gut's telling you.
Yeah, that's true.
Your gut is the ultimate determining factor.
All right, for sure, for sure.
But don't grab Joe's balls like you said, Chad.
Mm-hmm.
Yeah, just his metaphorical balls just because they're huge and you know what dude focus on making sure your date's having a good time
because this night's really about her so i would that's right yeah i would uh make sure that you're
like the best date you can be yeah good call good call because All right, sure. It is cool if you're cool, but if you're too cool, you know, you might not have time for it.
Yeah, yeah, yeah, for sure.
All right.
Thank you, dude.
All right, thanks, dude.
Later, dude.
Peace.
See you, bro.
All right.
Dude, great abridged by that guy.
Quesh, apreech.
He's a smart kid.
That dude was 37, right?
Yeah.
Yeah.
Aaron, do you know him?
He sounded familiar.
So you're calling people, so it's not call-ins.
We're calling them.
That's cool.
Well, just when no one's calling in the moment.
Oh.
Hey, what's up?
This is JT from Going Deep with Chad and JT.
Can I put you on the podcast? Hi, Chad. What's up, J oh hey what's up this is jt from going deep with chad and jt can i put you on the podcast what's up dude all right man you're on with chad and jt what up dude
what up chad how you doing we got joe here hey man what up uncle joe what's up
start talking boys so i'm down in a Gatlinburg Tennessee with a famous
Dollywood amusement park is and my mission the whole week has just been to
find Dolly and marry Dolly so I've got all the other ladies all the sweet nice
employees give them a little dance and a little tango ask them a couple questions
and I know they have Dolly locked up somewhere Dolly is Dolly? Dolly Parton. Dolly Parton, famous cartoonist.
Oh, right, right, sure, sure. Yeah, Jolene.
Yeah, Jolene, that's the one.
And so I'm asking them all,
and I need to find
Dolly. She's unfortunately married,
but this young
buck's going to end that.
I'll promise you that. I just need some help
on trying to pursue her and trying
to get her out of her cage.
Aaron's got you.
This is Aaron, the sound guy.
Word on the street is she's actually quietly not into dudes.
Oh.
There you have it, man.
Aaron just threw a big wrench in there.
But, dude, I don't think that should keep you from pursuing a lifelong friendship with Dolly.
So stay on your track.
Yeah, your passion for her is palpable. So, you know, I think you've got to pursue this as much as you can.
You know, maybe if the employees aren't giving it up, you do a huge grand gesture.
You know, maybe you freaking skydive into Dollyland or something.
I will make Dolly love me,
boys. Nice.
I like the conviction. Good. Stay committed, dog.
Yeah. That's also a lyric.
Thanks, boys. I just want to say...
Oh, nice.
Thanks, man. Thanks for calling in. We really appreciate it.
Of course. Of course.
Y'all have a good one. You too. Yeah, you too.
Thanks for calling.
Mind if I say that
oh I love it
Joe you can say
anything you want
I don't know what
he was talking about
I've heard Dolly Parton
yeah is actually
quietly a lesbian
and has full sleeve tattoos
nice
that's why she always
wears long sleeves
oh wow
hey what's up man
this is JT
from Going Deep
with Chad and JT
can I put you on the podcast
hey what's up man you Going Deep with Chad and JT. Can I put you on the podcast?
Hey, what's up, man? You're on with Chad and JT.
What's good, boys? Is Strider there?
No, unfortunately he's not. He's on a vacation with his Khaleesi.
Joe's here.
What's up, Joe?
Hey, man. What's happening?
So I basically just had a question on... So I'm from Florida. I go to school there.
So I basically just had a question on, so I'm from Florida, go to school there.
And like, I was looking for some tips on what to do when there's no waves.
I'd have fun, stuff like that. Because the boys stoke levels just, they just drop drastically when there's no waves.
Especially in the summertime.
You got to stoke your other passions.
I mean, sometimes external factors are going to cut into the joy that we normally have but we got to find a way to fill that joy back up so i mean whether it's
skating bmxing playing vids kicking it with your boys and have an honest conversation whatever it
is you got to just do more of that bronzing yeah what do you like to do other than serve i mean serve party how much how much are you partying
not too much not too much school too so what's what's it down what's it i'm curious though
what's a rager look like what are we doing uh it depends if it's if it's the week probably just
hanging out at the boys' house, just chilling.
But if it's the weekend, hit up some bars, hit up some clubs.
You know how it goes down.
Yeah, for sure.
Maybe get a little more innovative with your partying.
Try some different games.
Throw in some flip cup in there, but maybe put a little twist on it,
like flip cup near a cliff. No, don't do that. Okay
I don't know what I'm talking about
Or maybe just watch Point Break and do what they do
What are you sure for sure dude, what are you studying?
I'm doing ocean engineering. Whoa nice
What do you want to do with that? I'm not 100%. Whoa, nice. Nice. Lord of the Decks. What do you want to do with that?
I'm not 100% sure yet, but maybe like naval architecture, something like that.
Oh, that's what my brother's doing.
Word.
Yeah.
He's on a barge with a hard hat right now, just flexing.
Word, word.
All right, man.
All right, well.
I'm just going to give a shout out to a couple of my boys. Yes. For sure. All right, shout out, word. Alright, man. Can I give a shout out to a couple of my boys?
Yeah, for sure.
Alright, shout out Chris. Shout out Max.
Shout out my boy Liam and Caleb.
Word.
They sound like you guys.
Yeah, for sure, dude.
Alright, later, dog.
Peace out.
We were getting a call coming in.
It would have been fun to take the call.
Well, we're going to call him right back.
If the person doesn't answer, that's embarrassing, right?
I can cut it.
Hey, what's up, man?
This is JT from Going Deep with Chad and JT.
Can I put you on the pod?
Hey, you're on.
How we doing?
Hey, you're on with Chad and JT.
What's going on, boys? What's up, Chad, JT?
What's up, Uncle Joe?
Hey, what's up? What's up, dude? I got to start including that. Joe, we're kind of from and JT. What's up, Chad, JT? What's up, Uncle Joe? Hey, what's up?
What's up, dude?
Joe, we're kind of from the Midwest.
We're from Michigan.
Oh, great.
Yeah, I'm from the Chicago area.
Yeah.
Oh, I got to say go Red Wings, though.
Sorry, Uncle Joe.
No, it's cool.
I respect them.
Hey, so let's get into it, boys.
What's up?
All right, so me and Brad.
I'm Mitch, by the way.
I got Brad here.
What up?
I just graduated college.
Nice.
And what the hell to do?
I got to increase my stoke here.
You're in Michigan?
Yes, yeah.
Come to the West Coast.
That's what I was thinking, dude.
It's just getting a bronze seat here in Michigan.
It's pretty brutal weather-wise.
Yeah, dude.
Maybe take a road trip.
Nothing better than a nice road trip.
You know, explore the country.
Get a van.
Well, Michigan's fun.
Why don't you guys just get a lake house for the summer and spend the summer by the lake?
Like they did in American Pie 2.
American Pie 2.
Yeah.
Yes.
And just be the legends of the lake.
So, we're from a small town.
So what's your thoughts on getting up and just leaving, packing up and just going? Packing it up and going to the big city.
I think if you're thinking about it, you should give it a try.
God damn it.
What if we're low in the fundal area, though?
Yeah, you boys got an extra room at your place?
No.
Maybe for like a night if you're my cousin.
I'll Airbnb it by you guys.
We can catch up, get some beers.
You got to teach me how to catch some sick waves.
Sounds good.
So what's the, are you thinking of going to Chicago or are you thinking of coming to L.A.?
I want to go somewhere warm.
Yeah, I'd rather go L.A.
Like Chicago's the same weather as here
Yeah but in summer it's good
It is
Yeah Michigan summers are great
We can always come back here
Yeah nice
How'd you guys become friends?
Oh
We've been
Since kindergarten
We're 22 now
We've been best buds
Since
Since we were fucking
Six, seven years old
Yeah right
I think we met each other in kindergarten
Nice Dude you know what You know what actually inspires me For the summers Is uh since we were fucking six, seven years old. Yeah, right. I think we met each other in kindergarten. Nice.
Dude, you know what actually inspires me for the summers
is Kid Rock's music video for All Summer Long.
Yeah.
Oh, yeah.
That makes me want to hit a lake.
It's a good Michigan reference, too.
Yeah, yeah, Michigan.
Hit a lake with some Budweiser's
and then find the love of your life for three months.
I love it. I think you just saw Kid Rock in Nashville. Yeah, yeah. Hit a lake with some Budweiser's and then find the love of your life for three months.
I love it.
I think you just saw Kid Rocket in Nashville.
Was he good?
He was unreal.
He showed up out of nowhere
with John Party and Big and Rich.
Oh, nice. I love John Party.
Incredible.
If I was you guys,
I would at least do the 4th
in Michigan. The 4th of July is at least do the 4th in Michigan.
The 4th of July is more fun in the Midwest, in my opinion.
Oh, we've got a nice 4 or 5 years, and we wake up at the crack of dawn and drink some beers for America.
Yeah, that's what's up.
Yeah, that sounds good.
It's good you guys have each other, too, so if you do decide to move, you can jump in with somebody else.
That's what we're hoping.
I feel like it would be a lot easier to move with someone than alone.
It's way easier, yeah.
Yeah, so American Pie 2 and Kid Rock all summer long.
Yeah.
Yeah, that's all you need.
That's all you need.
That's going to raise the joke right there.
I love it.
All right, man.
Good luck, boys.
All right, fellas. Have fun.
Hey, we're back.
Thanks, fellas.
Thanks, dudes.
Tell Strider to say hello as well.
Yeah, tell Strider to say what up.
For sure.
All right, boys.
Take it easy.
Thanks, boys.
Hello?
Hey, what's up, man?
You're on with Chad and JT and Uncle Joe.
This is Going Deep with Chad and JT.
Hey, dude.
Yo.
What's going on, boys?
Nothing, man. Hanging. How you doing?
I'm doing well. Just getting to the grocery store.
Oh, nice. What's your call about, my friend?
We're just seeing how you had many callers today.
I've had a good amount.
JT's been blowing up.
I can't believe I'm actually talking to you guys.
I just love all y'all's fast and furious coverage
and just y'all's inspiration for Paul Walker.
Thanks, dude.
All that shit cracks me up.
Man, I wish I had more to say.
I saw a Cali number.
Ah, shit. Well, it's all it's just like being streamed right now like no it's recorded no no it's recorded so we can oh right on
yeah we can all turn if needed if you have anything to say you could like pay homage to
joe's hog or something yeah i'd appreciate that what was that? if you have anything to say
you could like pay homage to Joe's Hog
or something like that
yeah man I wish Joe's Hog
has a nice life
and keeps growing and what not
thank you that's very sweet
what do you guys got going
y'all been hitting a lot of the waves out there
for sure dog hey man we're just gonna keep
pushing it was good talking to you, brother.
Hey, good talking, man.
I wish I was a better call.
No, you did a great job.
Thanks, man.
Hey, we'll catch it on the air.
All right.
Later, brother.
All right, later.
Bye.
We're going to keep pushing.
Call from Hudson Cockroft.
Oh, Hudson.
Hell yeah.
Is this Huddy Ice?
To send a voicemail, press 2.
Hey, what's up, man?
This is JT.
You're on with Chad, JT, and Joe on Going Deep with Chad and JT.
No way, I am?
Yes, you are.
Yeah.
Oh, my God.
Okay, so I have a Paul Walker statue petition right in front of me.
Is this hoodie ice?
Yes, it is.
Oh, dude.
Quit DMing my girlfriend.
What?
He DMs my girlfriend.
Why do you do that, Hoodie?
Because you weren't responding.
So I had to go through your girl.
He's trying to go through different angles.
You can't do that.
I also went through JT's girl as well.
What?
I admire the persistence, kind of.
Yeah.
Are you a weird guy normally?
No, not really.
Fair enough.
So you have a Paul Walker statue petition?
Yeah.
So you went to Santa Clara University, right?
I did.
Yeah, so this is in Cupertino.
Oh, nice.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
So I went to Cupertino.
They laughed me out.
And I have 200 signatures.
Nice.
And they basically laughed.
I even wore a tie and they laughed me out.
That's a bummer.
So I'm wondering if I could get your endorsement or something.
Yeah, we fully endorse the petition.
I can add your two names, your three names.
For a Paul Walker statue?
Yeah.
Yeah, 100%.
Yeah, for sure.
Yeah.
Thanks, my dog.
Yeah.
You're the best.
Thanks for supporting
the statue
alright dude
good talking to you man
tell my girlfriend
I said what up
me too
I will I will
later dog
bye
yeah
you gotta DM
JT's girlfriend too
yeah
dude the ball's on
everybody too
you'll be like
why are you doing that?
They're like, it's cool.
You're like, all right, yeah, I guess it's cool.
Hello?
Hello, this is Jake.
I'm sorry I couldn't get to the phone.
I'll give you a call when I get a chance.
Should I leave a message?
At the tone, please record your message.
When you have finished recording, you may hang up or press 1 for more options.
Yeah, I'll save a voicemail.
recording. You may hang up or press 1 for more options.
Save a voicemail.
Hey Jake, this is Joe from the
Going Deep with Chad and JT
podcast. Pick up your phone.
We're trying to get a hold of you.
Got him.
Thanks man.
Figures a Jake wouldn't answer
the phone. Alright, I got one.
Want me to do this one?
Yeah.
Hola, mi amor.
Hi, mi amor.
This is Joe from the
Going Deep with Chad and JT podcast.
You're on live with Chad and JT.
What is your question?
Mom, you're on.
Hey, Monica.
Hi, guys.
How are you?
I'm doing fantastic.
How are you?
We're good.
We're good, recording the podcast.
Okay, do I have a question for you guys?
I don't know if you have one.
I guess I have a question for you, Mom. When Noel
stole my car, remember
when that guy stole my car?
Of course. Why didn't you and
Dad ask him
to bring it back? Yeah, that's a good question.
Because you told
us not to do anything. You told
us you were going to handle it on your own.
Oh, yeah. That makes sense. I appreciate
you guys giving me that.
Yeah. You say
this is bad enough,
it's embarrassing, and you were
really upset because
you said we were nice to him
and for him to
do that was really
disrespectful to us
and to you, and it was really
embarrassing to you, so you didn't want us to do anything
you say I deal with it
oh that's nice you guys are nice
way to be independent
yeah why didn't do anything
exactly and we respect
the way he wanted to deal with it on his own
so we step back
what else is that mom
we trust your judgment,
my love.
Well, I didn't
do much in that case, but I appreciate
your trust. What's going on, Mom?
What are you up to? No, but the funniest
part when the car was brought back, remember
me and your brother?
Yeah, you guys were having fun collecting the evidence
and it really upset me. Oh, with
gloves, and Christopher had a pen in his hand so not to touch that, you guys were like having fun collecting the evidence and it really upset me. Oh, we wore gloves and Christopher had a pen in his hand so not to touch that, you know, not to mess up the fingerprints.
And we have a paper bag and Chris is moving things with a pen and we have the gloves on.
And you scared the – you threw us out of the garage.
You think this is funny?
Get out of here!
Chris and I walk away with the glove on.
Yeah. You're hilarious,
man. It was funny.
No, it was funny.
We thought we were like,
how do you call those shows?
CSI?
CSI.
Yeah, we were all
prepped for the job
now we walk in the house
with a towel between our legs
well I appreciate it
mom
that you guys at least put some effort into it
I am loving everything
you're posting on Instagram
oh thanks mama
I love you guys you guys are so funny mom will you tell
the story of uh when dad and uncle jimmy got in a fight at the toga party oh my god no it was it was
a it was a moulin rouge party moulin rouge right moulin rouge and it was was Tracy's 40th and Jimmy's 50th.
And it was amazing.
I mean, everybody went out of their way.
They rented the elephant from the movie.
Everything.
It was an amazing party.
So your dad got into an argument with one of...
He used to be one of the suppliers for the chemicals for the shampoo.
And your dad started fighting with him arguing and jimmy
is really close to him and jimmy was was in the pool at the moment so he heard they were arguing
and and jimmy came in a towel with a teacher on and a towel and the funniest part is they
start rolling on the ground and they start start, like, fighting each other.
And Jimmy's style came off.
And Jimmy was naked.
And when he looked down, my comment was like, oops, I married the wrong brother.
But it was ugly.
I mean, they really went at it.
And it was funny because one of them is half naked, and it was like, oh, my God.
Thanks God there weren't so many people left at the party.
Just like, you know, the last ones that are always the closest friends.
But, yeah, it was bad.
They really, really, really got into it.
That sounds, Mom, thank you for sharing that stuff with us.
Anytime. Call me anytime.
I'm loving this.
Thanks, Monica. Love you, Mom.
Love you guys.
Bye.
Love you too, babies. Bye.
That was a good call.
Yeah, that was fun.
Dude, Huddy coming in.
Just DMing our GFs gfs yeah it's pretty bold he's a bold dude he comments on like everything
with a lot of requests and he you know he was he was clowning on me
to her like he'd comment on our photos and he's like i have more steez than chad i'm like
oh he was doing that stuff?
He's like, I'm more hung than Chad.
And I'm like, what are you doing, dude?
Dude, yeah, I don't want to pile on,
but there's a lot of dudes who have that kind of energy.
Like I ran into a fan of ours at the improv, and he was drunk.
And I had some old friends from high school there
who had brought their girlfriends, and he was super fucked up, and he goes drunk and i had some old friends from high school there who had brought their
girlfriends and he was super fucked up and he goes to strider he's like who's that girl dating
and then strider was like him and pointed to our old buddy from high school and he went
really he doesn't even know us and he's talking shit on how our buddies don't deserve their
girlfriends when was this this was after the last locals only stand-up show. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Hilarious.
Yeah.
No, but I got love for Hudson
because he's pushing for the statue.
Yeah, his heart's in the right place.
He's just trying to get our attention.
Yeah.
I don't really understand the tactics, but...
That's what he's doing.
He just wants you to respond.
I respect the tenacity.
That's very magnanimous of
you dude how's that new phone that you know it it like it freaks me out with the you have this
button you get used to it super quickly did you yeah and the and the face recognition on it is
insane yeah it's great like yeah you don't need that button at the bottom that's how you get used
to it that's how you open it with face recognition yeah it's your face that's crazy but it can like see your face from like does it and the person
who sold it to me at the at&t store said like if you look enough like the person it'll still work
for facial recognition oh it shouldn't like they had a brother and brother and brother do it oh
really not even identical and it worked does that does that worry you that they're recording your
face like that dude i'm starting to
get worried about all that stuff like the idea that your phone is recording you and targeting
ads to you even when you're not actively using it it's just like listening to you that's something
that people are worried about right yeah yeah yeah that scares the hell out of me and then
someone's talking about getting an alexa you know alexa which sounds cool because you'd be like
alexa play lincoln park or something but then for sure if they say alexa's just listening to you all the time yeah and dude i like say
awful shit sometimes especially when i'm driving yeah oh yeah like there's enough in there to like
get me ostracized from the public for the rest of my life whoa you better watch it. Maybe I'll just put, maybe I'll just, you know,
put Alexa in like a safe
most times
and then when I'm boning,
I'll put Alexa out.
So they're like,
damn,
this guy's just boning
all the time.
Oh,
right.
This guy's the man.
And then I just get ads
for Douglas Lube
and Manscaped all the time.
Yeah,
for like gigolo clothing.
Yeah,
for fucking kimonos.
Yeah, and then, dude, I was on a on a wheels you know one of those little scooters that we like to ride around the wheels is the one that's
not a stand-up one it's like a mini bike that you ride and dude it connected to my bluetooth so i
could play music on i was like oh dude what a perk i can blast my music while i ride yeah and then it
wanted to connect with my contacts too oh i like, the mini bike company wants all my contacts?
Yeah.
Like, what the hell's going on here?
Yeah.
I don't know if I'd be listening to music riding one of those anyways.
I don't.
I listen to podcasts.
No, I wouldn't be listening to anything.
I'd be aware.
Of the road?
Yeah.
I know, dude.
But I need that little lowercase d danger to process my feelings sometimes.
Okay.
What is that? Lowercase d? Like like it's not actually dangerous you know it's
just like riding no i think it's actively dangerous yeah but you're right you're right
but on the street of the sidewalk but compared to like past processing behavior it's it's lowercase
d like i used to do like drugs or something like that joe do you do you listen to music when you
drive a lot yeah when i drive, but not You're a country guy
Yeah, I listen to a lot of country
When I drive, it's very relaxing
Do you like how they romanticize
Like, the small town life
In country music?
Yeah, I mean, I guess
I mean, I really just like the
Yeah, I mean, I guess
The lyrics are fine But I just, I like the rhythm are fine, but I just like the rhythm and the...
Do you have a cowboy hat?
The soothingness.
No.
Do you dream of one day owning a ranch and like...
No, I'm not a cowboy.
I mean, I'm a city guy, but...
Do you want to be a cowboy?
No.
You sure?
A little bit.
I feel like you'd be a good cowboy.
I could see you...
I could see you... I'm not a cowboy. cowboy. I could see you. Not a cowboy.
Well, I could see you very.
You're definitely not a cowboy, but you're kind of a cowboy.
No, I'm a city slicker.
Well, you can't ride a horse, but if I put you in jeans and a cowboy hat,
no one would think twice about you looking the part.
Yeah, I'd sport it.
Yeah, you've got the ruggedness of a cowboy.
The stoic masculinity.
Yeah. I could see him slaughtering animals in very like honorable way you know i don't know but
i see the thing i like about country music is that like small town like if there's like something
very like content about it sure like in the zach brown song homegrown the chorus goes i got some
good friends that live down the street,
got a good-looking woman with her arms around me,
here in a small town where it feels like home,
I've got everything I need and nothing that I don't.
Yep.
Amen.
Amen, right?
Yeah.
And especially when you've been in a city for a bit,
you start to really feel that.
You're like, maybe there is something smart about that simplicity.
For sure. There's none of that in la no no that's why yeah that listening to that music kind of calms you because this city's so busy and rat race you know do you guys dream of retiring in
like a smaller town one day i dream about it but i would never want to do it like i need uh i don't
think so at least where i'm at right now i need never want to do it like i need i don't think so at
least where i'm at right now i need the hustle and bustle and like the kind of manic energy in the
city yeah but i do definitely feel like oh it'd be nice to take a break but i know if i but but
the day i do that i'm gonna be like oh i need to get back to it you know yeah i heard about this
guy who he's retired in puerto vallarta and you're like, it's a nice place to vacation,
but like to like live there.
Right.
I don't think I can do it.
that'd be brutal.
We ran into a lot of those people in Cabo.
Yeah.
And they're,
they're moving at a different speed.
Yeah.
Like they kind of just like walk up slow,
look around.
Yeah.
They got nowhere to go.
They pull out like a half toasted joint.
They take a couple puffs.
Yeah.
They're like,
Oh yeah.
What are you guys up to?
Yeah.
And they don't have that like, what's going on?
Is everything going the way it's supposed to?
Like, are we on track?
Are we on target?
Let's go.
I like getting stuff done, you know, just like going through your day and being like,
I did this.
I did that.
I did this.
I did that.
There's lots of traffic.
Yeah.
I like that kind of day.
Some people don't.
You like traffic?
No, just like, you know, it's like.
Well, like yesterday we did like, we went from, where was your audition on Tuesday?
Burbank.
Oh, okay. So you're already in Burbank.
I went Venice to Burbank to West LA back to West Hollywood.
Whoa.
Yeah.
Why?
Because that's what the day, that's what was happening damn that's
that must have taken like five hours dude I crushed some pods yeah what pods you listen to
dude I listen to Mark Norman I was gonna actually make him my babe of the week but uh I'll switch it
up Mark Norman's a great comedian I listen to him on the underground comedy podcast I just think
that guy has such clarity when he talks about like the comedy scene and culture at large and he's because he's edgy but he's like really thoughtful about how he
deploys it yeah that's cool yeah i've been so listening to that most recently what about you
guys uh we'll have them listen to i've been listening books on tape actually dude's smart
yeah what are you listening to um was this a book I mentioned last week?
Sounds very memorable.
Oh, I know.
Fuck, what's it called?
I don't even know what he's listening to.
You're really taking it in.
Yeah.
What is it?
It's about how...
The nice guy one?
Yeah, no, that's what I've been listening to.
But I've also been reading, oh, Fingerprints of the Gods.
It's about how this guy is saying that archaeology, as we know it,
might not be as accurate as we think.
Really?
There was probably a lot of other civilizations before,
and that big cataclysmic events sort of wiped out the earth,
and that's why we don't...
So there's no evidence of any past civilizations?
There is, and a lot of archaeologists now are pretty dogmatic in their beliefs,
and they're like, any sort of contrary evidence to what they think,
they just don't accept it.
Okay, that's very interesting stuff.
Yeah.
You're into that? Yeah why would yeah i don't know i was i was thinking maybe you'd go deeper on it why does it interest you because you never really think about that
right yeah and you think you know if there are civilizations that got pretty advanced and then
got totally wiped out how advanced did they get you know right what were their iphones oh so you're saying we we kind of take it for granted
too that we're at this level of like advancement but that it could all just be taken away in a
in a blank if there's a comet or an asteroid or whatever then later dudes yeah every run is
temporary yeah no one you know you don't win a title every year forever. Yeah. What have you been consuming lately, Joe?
Like food-wise?
Come on.
I mean, I haven't been reading or listening to anything.
I just work a lot and work out.
Hang out with Julie?
Yeah, hang with Julie
a little bit, not much.
I just asked because you went to lunch with her yesterday.
She's annoying.
She bothers you, yeah.
No, I mean, she's cool.
I shouldn't say that.
I feel you, dog.
But yeah, I mean, yeah, I'll go to lunch
after this. I'm going to the eye doctor.
It should be good.
How are your eyes?
They seem good.
I just need new contact lenses.
You wear contacts?
Yeah.
I didn't know that.
Yeah, you wouldn't.
All right, let's keep it moving.
Let's get into the beefs and stuff.
Yeah.
Chad, what is your beef of the week?
My beef of the week is with cotton shrinkage cotton what up i'm tired of you shrinking on my ass dudes you know i like shirts and i like a
very specific fit and oftentimes i'll go to a store maybe j crew maybe pack sun maybe tillies
maybe banana republic maybe whatever.
And I want to get a nice shirt.
I like basic shirts.
I like solid colors.
And I like a very specific fit.
Not too small, not too big, just right in the middle.
Probably a larger fit.
And oftentimes I'll try on the shirt and I'll be like, this fits well, you know.
And I'll ask the dude, I'll be like, is this going to shrink a lot?
And he's like, nah, not too much. And then the shrinkage comes in, it's ruined, you know and i'll ask the dude i'll be like is this gonna shrink a lot and he's like no not too much and then the shrinkage comes in it's ruined you know it's true and i can't wear
the shirt the same way i wear the shirt and it does not make me feel good you know you know when
you put on a shirt and you're like i just don't feel good in this shirt that's what happens i'm
like i wasted money on this and now i'm wearing a shirt that doesn't make me feel good
because the cotton shrinks.
So cotton, why don't you stand up to the dryer
and say I'm not shrinking with you.
Well, this is what you have to do.
You have to wash your clothes in cold water.
Do you do that?
I do warm.
Okay, well, that's your problem.
You're welcome.
But it is hard to keep them from shrinking.
Wash your clothes.
I know I'm no laundry expert.
In cold water.
Really more of a novice.
All right, Joe.
The color cycle, wash.
Joe, you're hijacking his beef.
I appreciate the honesty, though.
Joe really sticks it to you.
And now I'm going to wash with cold. but does it not wash as well when it's cold
it's fine
does it not wash as well
no there's still soap in there
I didn't say don't use soap
right does it get it out as much as the hot water
yeah why do they have the options
okay
keep shrinking your clothes
I'm asking why.
I'm not arguing with you.
Because
certain things you want to wash
like towels, sheets.
Right, boxers, socks.
You want to wash warm.
But the shirts you got to be careful with.
Yeah.
Alright.
Because that stuff doesn't shrink.
Dude, I do laundry sometimes too and my clothes still smell afterwards.
Or like the stain doesn't come out of my jeans.
Like it's a pretty frustrating process.
I mean, our washer and dryer at our building is what?
Like a 6 out of 10 on the washer and dryer scale?
Yeah.
We can't overload it.
That's the thing too.
Right.
You got to keep it real low.
You got to keep it, you know, to keep a you know like a medium size load yeah even where the line is where it says don't go above
this you should probably if you're being smart stay 15 below that yeah i'd say a couple inches
below it right are you familiar with your machine do you have good rapport with it um
you know i can't say that i do have good rapport with it you know we have
it's kind of a you know tough relation because it takes too many quarters i think and i'm
kind of beef with it for that i'm like why do you need to take a dollar 50 for one wash
it is crazy you know and it keeps going up yeah yeah next place i get i'm getting my own washer
and dryer and a hammock dude having a washer dryer
in unit oh it's huge i don't have a dishwasher too i forgot about that oh yeah like my girlfriend
has a dishwasher and she's like i'm gonna wash the dishes and it took her like two minutes
yeah yeah whoa yeah we have a dishwasher i forgot about the dishwasher we got a dishwasher but we
don't have a full-size fridge. We have two mini fridges.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Joe, who is your beef of the week?
My beef of the week is ground beef.
I really like ground beef tacos with a little bit of zesty spice to them.
You don't really get ground beef too much anymore, with a little bit of zesty spice to them.
You don't really get ground beef too much anymore,
and there's a few places that have ground beef nachos and ground beef tacos,
and my mom used to always make ground beef tacos for us when we were kids,
and I really miss ground beef.
It's great stuff. Ground is my beef of the week.
I like that. I like that. I love ground beef, too great stuff ground is my beef of the week i like that i like that i love ground
beef grind it up i had flying dutchman before this dude i went to costco i got a bunch of
ground beef you know like two pounds or something grilled it all up got some la victoria taco sauce
and some avocado and went to town oh that sounds. That's a nice way to spend a day.
My beef of the week is with Monte Teo,
former linebacker from Notre Dame University,
played for the Chargers for a couple years.
I think he's a free agent, even though he's only 28.
I bet you he could still play pretty good.
But when he was in college his senior year,
he was a Heisman contender,
which is pretty rare for a defensive player.
But that Notre Dame team barely let up any touchdowns.
But what also propelled his Heisman campaign was that he said his girlfriend
was sick with leukemia while he was playing.
And then she passed away and he was playing in her honor.
And then Deadspin did a report on it and found out that the girlfriend
didn't actually exist.
Yeah, that was wild. report on it and found out that the girlfriend didn't actually exist and then uh monte came out
and said that he was duped by a a cousin of his ronnie tui sapasopa i don't know if he's any
relation to the tui sapasopas who play in the nfl um but uh and and that the guy faked a woman's
voice and that he was too embarrassed to admit to everybody that the relationship was only online
because they think he was a weirdo and it was all just
a very bizarre story and in the end i don't believe him yeah he was catfished yeah i don't
totally believe that he was catfished i know that's kind of like a cynical way to look at it
but i just think uh he thought it would be a good way i don't know i just think he knew he knew
something and uh it was just such a weird thing.
And my brother had just graduated, or my brother was at Notre Dame at the time,
and it was hard to watch him make faces every time someone brought it up.
He's like, oh, yeah. Oh, God, yeah.
Yeah, it's not good.
So, yeah, you're my Beef of the Week, Monte Teo.
Weird story.
Yeah, it was.
Yeah, one of the weirdest ever how do you think
did catfishing
was there a form of catfishing before the internet
pen pals
but the day to day
intensity of it must have been so much less
yeah
you get one like once a month
and then I guess the guy admitted that he catfished Monte, Ronnie.
He said he did it because he was like in love with them
and that was like the best way to get close to him was to like fake being a girl.
Weird.
And yeah, I just still think Monte knew something more than he let on.
Oh, yeah.
Yeah.
He's in the NFL.
You don't think you could get like a real girlfriend?
Yeah, yeah. He's in the NFL. You don't think you could get a real girlfriend? Yeah, exactly.
Chad, who is your babe of the week?
My babe of the week is Daisy Ridley.
Daisy Ridley plays...
What's her name in Star Wars?
Rey.
Rey.
Rey.
Thank you, Aaron.
Rey.
She plays Rey in Star Wars? Rey. Rey. Rey. Thank you, Aaron. Rey. She plays Rey in Star Wars. It was just, you know, I can't imagine the unbelievable amount of pressure to take on
the main role in the new chapter of the Star Wars franchise.
That's huge.
And I think she's done it well.
She's a major babe.
I think she's done it with grace.
She handles a lightsaber like a boss.
You can tell the force is deep within her.
So I just wanted to commend her for taking on the force and taking on this new chapter and doing it with style.
So that's why she's a babe.
Nice.
Joe, who is your babe of the week?
It's going to be my sister.
She's having her first child in a few weeks.
And it's going to be a baby girl.
Yeah, she's due mid-July.
And it's very exciting.
I'm very happy for her and her husband, the great people.
And I'm looking forward to being an uncle again.
Yeah, and she seems to be doing well.
She's feeling good.
She's very big.
But, you know, that happens.
Nice.
Yeah, pregnancy crazy.
Yeah, she's eating a lot, you know. For for sure my babe of the week is uh greg warner
i don't know if i've uh given him enough the week before but it's long overdue he's a great guy
uh used to be my road dog when he lived in los angeles but now he's in new york so now we're
like uh you know just pen pals we call each other a lot and uh i always enjoy talking to him and one
of the things i like most about him is that uh he deepens my appreciation for art like when i used to get into his car he'd
be like all right dude listen to this kanye west song and he'd really make me sit there and pay
attention and uh it was a really deep experience because i i would i felt like i was hearing it
through his eyes or seeing it through or hearing it through his ears or seeing it through his eyes
and uh i always really appreciate that about him so you're my uh babe of the week greg warner and he was fun to party with nice yeah he's a good guy
solid guy he lived in downtown though and joe hated that i remember that yeah yeah i mean
well it was just funny how he would talk it up and we would just say this is trash
and i mean it was before they were even building up.
Like, downtown now is pretty cool, but this was a few years back when it was.
I still think it's trash.
Yeah.
Every time I go down there, I'm like, I hate this.
Yeah.
Yeah, it's a weird vibe.
I'm not into it.
And he was just all about it.
Like, let's go to these bars and making us come down.
I mean, he had a cool place
that we had like a like a like a loft yeah yeah he had a cool downtown loft um but yeah it was
funny how he was so into living downtown and just loving that downtown vibe yeah it's a little weird. Chad, who is your legend of the week?
My legend of the week is my new niece, Taylor.
Nice.
Whoa.
My sister-in-law gave birth to a new baby girl yesterday.
Taylor, welcome to the world.
Cutest baby ever.
She looks, you can tell she looks like my brother.
She has dark hair kind of
blue eyes very cute baby and he says she's super sweet he wrapped her up like a little burrito
and she's just in her little um hospital carrier thing just chilling being sweet so welcome to the
world i can't wait to show you the art of tanning um i'm stoked to be
your uncle you know um i hope you listen to this podcast someday maybe like 10 years from now you
can really take it in and uh understand what i'm talking about but i just want to name you legend
you're a freaking legend welcome to the family i know you're gonna dominate this life for sure
yeah no that's for sure you're gonna dominate this life and For sure.
No, that's for sure.
Good to say.
You're going to dominate this life, and you're going to crush it,
and I'm going to be there to support you all along the way.
So stay stoked, little baby.
Stay stoked, baby.
And I'll see you in August.
Joe, who is your legend of the week?
It's one of my best friends back in chicago he um you know he's been a he's a chef and restaurant owner and the business that they do is so great that they just expanded to a bigger
restaurant nice they needed more room because there's just so many people coming in and out
more room because there's just so many people coming in and out and they bought up a bigger space um you know just because everything is he's hitting on all cylinders and uh this is a guy who
when we were younger when we were partying and you know uh we'd be out late at night he'd be like oh
i gotta get up for work and he was he was working hard at a very young age
and kind of like you know deserves all the success and you know it's good to see him flourishing now
because he put in the work early um whereas a lot of us were partying while he was working and
getting up early and putting in his time and now now it's paying off, and it's great to see.
Dude, nice.
That's the definition of hard work.
Yeah, that was a nice legend, bro.
Thank you.
It's cool to see someone thriving in the restaurant business.
Yeah, he really is.
It's just unbelievable.
Nice, man.
Those are great legends.
My legend of the week is S svetlana andriva she's a uh boxing
coach in russia and she has a really fire instagram account and i just love watching her uh teach
everybody how to box she's like always grabbing guys and she's like no no
and her punches are like incredible like she looks like, like, mop up every henchman and kiss the dragon.
And, yeah, I'm just a huge fan of hers.
I love her technique, and I love her energy in all of her videos.
So, Svetlana Andreeva, you are my Legend of the Week.
Nice.
Chad, do you have a quote of the week?
I do.
It comes from the frickin' wisest man ever yoda nice he's a
little green wise yeah i don't know if he's a man he's a green creature that's wise he seems like
he's a man of whatever species he is i think he's just really old and he's true right i think he's
like 900 years old green guy yeah i think he's like 900 years old yeah for sure i think he's just really old and he's true right i think he's like 900 years old
green guy yeah i think he's like 900 years old yeah for sure i think that's what happens when
you become 900 a lot of wisdom yeah you just get green in big years and you forget decades oh
that's like what happens to every human yeah that's true it'd be funny to see a 900 year old
joe you think you'd look like yoda Yeah, it'd be interesting. It could be a week from now.
It's true.
So, this comes from Yoda.
Train yourself to let go of everything you fear to
lose.
All may I do is, Joe, train yourself
to let go of everything you fear to lose.
Yeah, that's better. Dumbass.
Yeah, I like that better.
That makes sense. Yeah. Yeah, that's better. Dumbass. Yeah, I like that better. That makes sense.
Yeah.
So, yeah, train yourself to let go of everything you fear to lose.
Whoa.
That's awesome.
Joe, what is your quote of the week?
All right, my quote of the week is...
That was louder than, like, an M-80.
Sorry.
You fucking grunt like you got, like like a full train station inside of you.
Because I had something.
So my quote of the week is,
I'm here to eat ass and chew bubble gum,
and I'm all out of ass.
You said that.
I just made it up. I thought it'd fun you made that up that's great that's amazing
wow dude you're a real poet bro thanks i love you that was great to hear
do you like eating ass so i'm gonna chew i need to chew gum now because i'm not
do you did you get the joke yeah i got it all right but do you love eating ass
and not particularly. Really?
It was just a bit.
All right.
All right, dude.
My quote of the week is from the book I'm reading,
Karl Ove Norsgaard's book one, My Struggle.
I guess he wrote eight of these.
It's a pretty big achievement to write eight books about your own life.
I dig it.
And it's a long one.
He's walking around with this girl, Hannah, that he has a big crush on.
And up to this point in his life, he hasn't had much luck with the ladies.
And he's really keen on this one.
And she said, she said, I would have liked her father.
Would have, I wondered.
Hmm, I mumbled.
He sounds nice.
Laconic.
What does laconic mean, she asked, her green eyes looking at me.
Every time she did that, I almost fell apart.
I could smash all the windows around us, knock all the pedestrians to the ground, and jump up and down on them until all signs of life were extinguished. Yeah. ryan matter of fact perhaps exaggeratedly matter of fact i said sort of understated yeah that's a lot of energy from a glance passionate love yeah dudes what else
uh what else we're going to san francisco this weekend yeah we're gonna be in sf saturday and
sunday i'll be in la dude and then then we're doing a podcast about Entourage.
The episode
One Day in the Valley.
Which is an epic episode.
Johnny Drama talking about how much
he hates the Valley.
I told you, I only go to the Valley November
through March. And even then, only
Sushi Roll.
Nice.
It's a great episode. And thenince gets everyone to do coddy um oh and then
he goes to the high school party and rages with the high school it's such a good episode rolling
black out or threatening the box office weekend for aquaman yeah so he just goes and rages he
disconnects vince is great at disconnecting yeah yeah yeah it's almost like he's so good at
disconnecting it's hard to imagine him actually, it's hard to imagine him actually working.
It's hard to imagine him engaged and committed to something.
Yeah.
Yeah.
He's just chilling.
He's just a chiller.
Chilling hard.
Joe, what are your plans this weekend?
A couple shows, work.
Yeah, it should be good.
That's it.
Any new material you're working on?
Yeah, some.
How's it coming? Fine.
Nice.
Is there anybody else you guys want to call?
Should we call Julie?
You think that'd be fun?
I think she'd be good, yeah.
You guys down?
Yeah.
You want her live on here?
Yeah.
Yeah, I mean, we could try.
She might be at work, though.
Your call has been forwarded to an automatic
Yeah I think she might be in the
Operating room
She's busy
We could pitch your brother
She told me she had a busy week
We could pitch your brother on our CrossFit names
Oh let's call him
Do you want to call Kevin
Oh yeah we could call Kevin next Yeah. Do you want to call Kevin?
Oh, yeah. We can call Kevin next, too.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
We can call my brother, too.
He can do a movie review.
You're sick to break him up that way.
All right.
We're one for three.
Thank you.
Who else can we call? Do you mind if we try my other brother yeah and then my brother's ready to do a review of a movie
sweet what movie you'll have to hear it
what's up hey uh you're on you're on the podcast marco what's up? Hey, you're on the podcast. Mark, congratulations.
Congrats with the new baby.
Yeah, congratulations, Mark.
Thanks, guys.
This is Joe.
How's fatherhood treating you so far?
It's awesome.
Yeah?
She just powered through like an hour's worth of food.
That's awesome.
Whoa, nice.
Trying to get her to grow.
Nice.
Nice.
Yeah.
Oh, you're going to be good at that.
How tall do you want her to be?
5'8 plus.
Solid.
Yeah, that's my only job right now in life is to feed her and to feed the wife so she can feed her.
Dude, I didn't think about that job that you're going to have, and now I'm thinking about how good you're going to be at that.
Yeah, that's what I've been training for.
Yeah, you've been training for that for like five years.
You're going to dominate.
Yeah.
We need her to get a full-ride athletic scholarship
so I don't have to save for college.
What sport are you thinking?
I think track and field.
That's where my money is.
Dude, she probably can't, but a lot of smart families in Orange County
would train their sons to be long snappers in football.
Oh, yeah.
Because it's like a position that no one's really good at,
and then their kids would get scholarships because there's not many long snappers.
Yeah, you bank on that niche.
Yeah, exactly.
Yeah, it's something like that.
I don't know exactly how it's going to play out, but mom was all state track so that's that's where my money is yeah my sister-in-law her parents they cycle
like a ton and her mom is she's just like she does triathlons a ton oh so the genetics are top notch
oh yeah and bromwyn uh bromwyn ran track right yeah she was an all-state hurdler. And you were a good sprinter, right?
Yeah.
Yeah, not bad.
Yeah.
Not bad.
You were a wide receiver in high school, right?
Yeah, and tight end.
That's right.
Nice.
I still hold the eighth grade field record for shot put as well.
Oh, I remember you dominated that.
Yeah, yeah.
I forgot about that.
Yeah.
I remember Trent, we were that. Yeah, yeah. I forgot about that. Yeah. Do you remember Trent?
We were playing flag football, and I got both his flags, and I stomped on him.
Do you remember that?
Yeah.
Just dominated Trent.
Just dominated.
Dude, I got both your flags, bitch.
All right, well, we just wanted to say congrats.
Oh, wait.
Thanks.
Did you talk to Joe
Joe's here too
yeah hey Joe
I was just watching your post from today
with all three of you
so keep up the good work
yeah hell yeah we're having fun
thanks man
congrats on Taylor
yeah congrats
thanks guys thanks for the call
talk to you later
that was great you could hear how excited he was Congrats, dude. Yeah, congrats. Thanks, guys. Thanks for the call. Yeah, yeah. Later, man. Talk to you later. Talk to you later.
That was great.
You could hear how excited he was in his voice.
He's pumped.
Call Kevin.
Yeah, I can call my brother, then Kevin, and then can we call one of your parents, Joe?
No.
No. No.
Dude, should we try Strider too?
Yeah.
Hey, what's up?
What up, dude?
What up?
This is my brother, Chris.
Hey, Chris, you're on the podcast.
What up, Chris?
Hey, what's up, Joe?
Hey. How you living, dog? Who else is on there? the podcast. What up, Chris? Hey, what's up, Joe? Hey.
How you living, dog?
Who else is on there?
Just Chad.
What up, dude?
What up, dog?
How you doing?
How's work?
Good, man.
Nice.
Chris, you're probably the biggest cinephile I know.
Can I get your latest review on a film you've seen?
Yeah.
I've actually been slumping a little bit. The movie i saw was uh godzilla king of monsters oh was it good uh well i'll get into it yeah sorry
jump the gun there might as well jump in yeah i will say that it looks dope a lot, but almost too much.
Right.
Like, there's, like, everything in it is treated with, like, such reverence and awe.
Like, even, like, the keyboards and, like, command centers that you're just, like, it just kind of wears on you for a while.
What's that?
You're overstimulated?
For sure.
And it's also, like, over two hours sure and it's also like over two hours and
it's just like yeah whoa like everyone's just constantly being blown away they just kind of
you just kind of lose it and i will say that by the end it's uh it's pretty exhausting do they do
the spielberg awe shot you know the spielberg shot where they show the person's face being an awe
and then they cut to the monster yeah there's like they do that about 60 times yeah they go
to that well a lot too much it's also something that they did a lot in the first one um especially
uh ken wantonabi's uh uh he's like a cryptozoologist or something.
I don't think it's real.
I remember that.
Good job, title.
I'd say my favorite scene was probably when Ken Watanabe tracks Godzilla down to his lair after a fight to, spoiler alert, although know, before the third act, so it's not too much.
And Godzilla just took a beating, so he's just taking a fat nap in the center of the earth.
And Ken Watanabe goes in there to set off a nuke to juice him up for his final fight.
Whoa.
And in there, like, a nice little moment where, like, a sleepy Godzilla kind of awakes from a slumber.
a nice little moment where like a sleepy godzilla kind of awakes from a slumber and it's kind of checking this dude out who's just got a big bomb and he's just slowly dying and he's like what's up
i'm gonna jack you up and then you know the showdown happens which is pretty cool that's
awesome that's like miyagi working on daniel's son before the final battle yeah and it's pretty
and like his lair is pretty dope.
It kind of looks like it's just beyond Atlantis,
but they don't even talk about that.
And there's just lava pouring everywhere,
and he's just snoozing away.
Nice, dude.
It's pretty cute.
Yeah, but overall, I'd say probably about a 2 out of 5.
Ooh.
Definitely wait
for it to just come on cable.
No need to rush out to the theaters
to see this one.
Good to know. Thank you, Chris.
Anything good we should be watching?
I don't know, man.
I just watched Euphoria.
Is that good?
Is that the Zendaya one?
Yeah, on HBO.
I watched the first episode.
It's like an hour ago.
It looks heavy.
It's pretty unfun.
Oh, yeah.
Yeah.
You should tell these high school kids that trying to get laid and doing drugs,
you know, can be cool.
It can be fun and activity, but they're all pretty vicious.
Yeah, I turned it off once the one girl was like
giving herself shots in her bruised butt i was like okay oh yeah you hadn't gotten the meat of
the episode oh lord oh lord and uh you see a nice eric dane prosthetic wiener that was cool nice
i couldn't slip it on a jimmy hat that was that was uh but again it's just not
fun like that should be fun but it's not it's just creepy or like sexually violent yeah i think
you really crystallized that we want dong and media right now to be fun dong not yeah not awful
dong because i mean that that story's that story's already been hurting us enough.
All right, man.
Well, Chris, thanks for giving us your review, dude.
It was nice having you on the pod.
I'm sure we'll have you back soon.
Sounds good.
I'll see you this weekend.
Love you, guys.
Hey, Chris, good hearing from you.
Good talking to you, Chris.
Thank you for the review.
See you.
All right.
Later, dudes.
What's funny about a movie like Godzilla,
it's like I don't necessarily know if they're going for the good reviews
when they're making that movie.
Like when people criticize it, do you think they even care?
My brother called that.
Like there's not going to be, like you'll never hear,
best picture, Godzilla, King of the Monsters.
I don't think they're going for the big awards.
I think they're going for that visual stuff.
That's what they want.
They're going for a movie that looks cool.
But you still got to tell a good story.
Well, I don't think they even care.
You and my brother had a Rocky Star II relationship because I had a Fourth of July party,
which was probably the best Fourth of July party I've ever been to.
Nice transition.
So I didn't like you saying that West Coast doesn't do Fourth of July as well as World of Thrones.
Well, I mean, typically, no. I mean, you're not even going to be here do 4th of July as well Well I mean typically no
I mean you're not even going to be here
For the 4th of July
So if the 4th of July was so great
You would stay
I have a bachelor party I'm going to
You're not even going to be in America
I'm going to be in Newport
Can I come?
Yeah that's what's up
That'll be fun I'm glad I'm having a cruise
If I wasn't going to Cabo, I'd be with you.
But I'm going for a bachelor party with my bros from Orange County.
We're celebrating America.
Yeah, way to go to Mexico for the fourth.
Yeah, what are you doing?
Why are you guys – I don't understand this.
I understand it completely.
I don't know what you're not understanding.
At my great Fourth of July party, you and I got tilted on some Adderall,
and then you met a nice girl, and you went into the garage,
and you – was the car unlocked?
You broke into a car and you started having sex in it or you were about to have sex in it.
Yeah, the car was unlocked.
I didn't break into anyone's car.
I came downstairs to get a condom and I accidentally – I saw you in there and I got so excited I opened the door.
And then the alarms to the car went off.
It turned out it was my brother's girlfriend's brother's car.
So my brother kicked you out of the party for desecrating the car.
And then I ran to the top of the stairs and on the balcony and I went, Joe.
I was like, dude, I'm sorry my brother kicked you out.
And he turned and he said, it's all right.
He had to stand tall for his lady.
And then he walked away.
The thing is though, we didn't even do anything.
We weren't like in the middle of it.
We were like maybe on the way to doing it.
I wasn't naked or anything.
Right.
I'm stoked for you, though.
But now you guys are dick as thieves.
Yeah, that was years ago.
Yeah.
All right.
Yeah, we got another call, guys.
What should we talk to?
Should we talk about the names?
Yeah.
Oh, he called back.
Hey, Bill.
Hi.
Hey, you're on with JT and Joe.
Hey, Bill, what's up?
Hey, Joe, how are you doing?
Good, man.
We're doing one of your favorite activities.
Someone wants to say hi.
Oh, yeah.
Hi, Chad.
I'm eating churros.
Oh, hey, Charlie.
She's eating churros?
Is it Charlie? Yeah, it is. Hey, Chad. I'm eating churros. Oh, hey, Charlie. She's eating churros? Is that Charlie?
Yeah, it is.
Hey, Charlie.
We're at the taco place eating churros with the kids.
Oh, that's awesome.
Well, I hope you guys are having fun.
Yeah, it's sort of Strider's domestic bliss dream, right?
Yeah.
Oh, yeah.
I should put you guys in touch.
You guys can talk shop.
Yeah.
We wanted to go over the names we sent in.
Does anything tickle your fancy?
Hold on.
Let me pull it up.
Okay.
And then what direction were you hoping to go with the name?
Did you have any kind of themes you wanted to touch on?
Did you think about Joe's
hog?
Oh, you didn't send him that.
I like the idea of Thanksgiving dinner.
Yeah.
It's got a robust feel.
It does.
You gotta just stuff it, right?
Yeah, stuff it. Team stuff it.
Oh, yeah, that's good.
Put some nice glaze Yeah, stuff it. Team stuff it. Oh, yeah, that sounds good.
Put some nice glaze on top of it. Maybe put some
citrus in the cavity to keep it moist.
Yeah, I could imagine you guys talking shit to other
teams by pouring syrup on one
of your guys.
Yeah.
Well, if you guys come out east,
soon you'll have to meet up with a squad.
A squad squad. It would be an honor to lift with you guys for sure east, soon you'll have to beat up with a squad.
A squad squad.
It would be an honor to lift with you guys for sure.
Yeah, we'll do some curls.
Hammer curls.
Hammer curls.
Right.
I'm in.
The hammer curl is better for the long head of the bike. For CrossFit, do you actually use hammers for the hammer curls?
I mean, I would think so.
That was a legitimate question.
Yeah, it's a serious question.
It's a fair question, yeah.
It'd be more fun that way.
I heard you use like an axe.
Do you want to say hi?
Can you say hi?
Hi.
Hey.
Is this Jane?
That was Jane, yeah.
Hey, Jane.
How's she doing?
I'm not putting you on speaker because we're in a restaurant. She's doing well. She has a cupcake purse. Oh, yeah. Hey, Jane. How's she doing? I'm not putting you on speaker because we're in a restaurant.
She's doing well.
She has a cupcake purse.
Oh, nice.
Right now with a kitty in it.
Oh, that's fun.
It's actually, maybe you want to tell the guys that it actually was yours
and you just gave it to her because you were done with it.
Oh, nice.
It was yours?
It was Chad's when he was a kid yeah
i love that thing my cupcake purse yeah that's awesome yeah i love that i love cupcakes yeah
you should still be rocking that yeah uh jane can i borrow it
uh we just talked to uh mark and he uh he's pretty amped on fatherhood
oh yeah i think uh i think he's pretty amped on fatherhood.
Oh, yeah.
I think he's pretty pumped to feed this baby.
Yeah, I mean, what he doesn't realize is the baby can't just eat steak right now.
It has to be nursed.
And you can't start lifting until you're about four or five years old. But if they cook the steak right and they make it, like, extra tender,
maybe it'll go down like baby food.
Yeah.
I'm up here.
He'll find a way.
Beef puree?
Yeah.
You liquefy the beef?
Here, I blended up some cod liver for you.
Eat up.
I know.
I shot a turkey in May, and it's in the freezer.
And he goes, well, what do you do with the entrails?
I'm like, I threw them away.
And he goes, why don't you
eat them? I go, do you eat
turkey entrails? He goes, no, but
maybe it's good. I'm like, okay, why don't you eat it
and tell me what it tastes like
and then I'll keep it.
Oh, man.
That's hilarious.
Yeah, he wants to be a
snout to tail eater.
Yeah, he wants to eat the whole thing.
He wants to eat the whole buffalo, like we said in Native American culture.
Yeah.
I imagine I'll get a text from him someday that he's buzzing off entrails.
He used, like, the skin to, like, make clothes,
and he used, like, the claws to make glasses or something.
Alright, Bill.
Thanks for taking the call.
Okay, well, you're welcome. Sorry I'm at the restaurant
now with the kids, so it's hard to chat.
Have a good rest of your day.
Okay, boys. Thanks for the call.
Bye, Charlie and Jane.
Let's try my dad real quick.
Oh, nice.
And then maybe we'll prank call somebody to end it.
Oh, we should do prank calls.
Prank Kevin.
Oh, yeah, we'll prank call Kevin.
But he'll know it's us.
Yeah, isn't there a way to disguise that?
Your call has been forwarded to an...
Oh, damn it.
He's being evasive, I bet. No, that's not fair to him. He might just Oh damn it He's being evasive I bet
No that's not fair to him
He might just be busy
He's being evasive
Yeah evasive
Well cause he just
It went quickly to voicemail
Which means he shot it to that
But I'm all over him
Alright here we go
Let's just fuck with Kevin
Yeah Yeah hey you're on the podcast bitch Yeah what's up small fuck with Kevin.
Yeah.
Yeah, hey, you're on the podcast, bitch.
Yeah, what's up, Small? Wait, don't come at me.
What's up?
What's up, Kevin?
Hey, Kevin.
Yeah, what's up?
How you doing, brother?
Good.
What are you guys talking about?
We're just chopping it up with the people in our lives.
We're curious how you're living.
I'm doing fine.
I don't know why you're calling me in the middle of your podcast
after all the attacks you've made on me.
Do you guys have any questions?
I'm excited for your bachelor party,
and then I can't make it to the wedding,
but I think that's going to be a wing dinger.
What are you most excited about for the bachelor party um just being in close
quarters with all you bros well i do have you mentioned that joe bailed on the bachelor party
yeah i'm not going why because i'm going to chicago that weekend yeah he's gonna miss out
damn what about you chad are you coming yeah i'm coming all right i venmoed you oh yeah you did venmo me yeah guess who hasn't venmoed me
yet jt yeah sorry i'll venmo you dog my bad all right epic um kevin is there anything you can say
to all the stokers out there do you have a message for them? Yeah, keep stoking. Don't judge somebody by their first impression.
Why not?
Why not?
Yeah.
I don't know, because you've got to get to know somebody first.
On first glance, you might think somebody,
hey, this guy's not cool, he's not chill, he might be a schmole,
we want to book him out of our group.
But if you take a bigger look at him you might realize that you know you might
actually be the schmo interesting other person might be good you're preaching self-awareness
dog i love it also if you uh if you if you need to uh wax your board, remember circles and stars with the base coat and then the wax.
Nice.
Thanks, dude.
Thanks, Kev.
Good talking to you, Kev.
Thanks for getting vulnerable there.
Okay.
Thank you.
Yeah, yeah.
Let me know if you have any other questions.
Keep your stoke up.
Later, brother.
Later.
All right.
Peace.
All right.
I think two more.
We'll do Hannah, and then we'll do Strider, then we'll hang out how can we prank call how can we like call from a different
number star six nine does that's that's the thing i think that's the number that previously called
maybe we prank call my cousin danny
yeah we'll plug it into one of your guys's phones yeah your cousin danny yeah what what's the angle
here yeah um we'll say that he um he's been staying at one of our rental units in um in um
lake what's one of the lakes that people go to in california lake elsinore yeah yeah at havasu yeah at havasu he's
got one of our timeshares at havasu and it's wrecked yeah and all three of us own it and
we're pissed yeah sorry we're doing this to you cousin danny you're a great guy
hi is this daniel yes daniel hi um i'm a timeshare owner
in Lake Havasu you're currently in one of my
units now I understand you and your
friends like to have a good time and that's
all well and good but you've absolutely
destroyed the
property it's wrecked
I don't know
there's red solo cups
everywhere it's stains
smashed table I don't know what you guys did to the toilet
Jizz stains
Jizz stains
Jizz stains
Shit stains
One of your friends
Probably you
Took a shit
On our new
King sized
Master bedroom bed
Yes Mr. Thomas
Yeah I masturbate on that bed
Yeah
Danny you're good I'm good Yeah, I masturbate on that bed. Yeah.
Danny, you're good.
I'm good.
We'll keep pranking him.
Keep pranking him.
We'll get him.
You just all over.
I mean, I got to commend you guys because one of you guys has a huge load. I don't know if it's you or one of your buddies, but aside from my anger from all the damage,
one of you guys has huge balls.
I just want to commend you for dropping a big one.
Yeah, it looks like Elmer's glue in there.
Yeah, you're going to pay us back for all the damage, and then you're going to connect
us with your friends who has the big jizz loads, because I'd like to take them out to
dinner.
Yeah.
I want to figure out what he eats.
Is it oysters?
Is that what it does?
You and your friends are slim and shellfish?
Oh, black beans, huh?
Yeah, it's black beans that does the magic.
Well, I can't have those carbohydrates.
Danny, do you know who this is?
Of course I do.
Did you know it was me from the beginning?
Yeah.
Yeah, you didn't disguise your voice at all.
We don't talk that much.
That was bad. All right bad Alright well I appreciate the feedback
How you doing dog?
I'm good how about you?
Good good man
I'll text you after this
And we'll talk about some shit
Okay
Alright miss you dude
Alright miss you too
I gotta take a piss.
Kevin says you called me mid-beat session.
Kevin said that?
Yeah.
That's why he was so tender.
The guy's getting married.
He's fucking beaten off.
What a pervert.
Go have sex or something, you know?
All right.
Hey, this guy, one of my buddies is a huge fan.
He's pretty hilarious, too. Should we prank him? Yeah. Same prank? Yeah, something. All right. Hey, this guy, one of my buddies is a huge fan. He's pretty hilarious too.
Should we prank him?
Yeah.
Same prank?
Yeah, yeah.
Same prank.
I'll disguise my voice more.
We did not get Danny for a second.
Can we do it from the bathroom?
Hello?
Hi, Mr. Connors?
Luke Connors?
Yes.
Yeah.
Hi, my name is Rick.
I'm a timeshare owner over here at Lake Havasu.
It seems that you rented one of our properties,
and I gotta say I am looking at it,
and it is trashed.
You know, the only problem with this
is that I listen to your voice all the time.
Oh, crap, dude.
Hey, it's not funny, bitch.
You know, I was ready to dig in and go for it.
I was just like, I'm not going to be able to do this because I'm acting.
This isn't real emotion, okay?
You guys have to disguise your voices.
You call me, hey, this is Chad from the fucking timeshare place.
Just say your fucking name.
Damn it.
Dude.
You think you're going to fool a guy on the 949 with this bullshit?
Yeah.
I knew something was up.
Damn, dude.
Yeah, I don't know.
And I think most people are pretty sure that they're not in a timeshare.
Dude, yeah, but, like but how's it looking, man?
Are you interested?
Yeah, right, right.
One of your buddies shot a huge load all over the wall.
We just want to figure out who was it.
Yeah, we want to know who your friend is with the monster loads, Luke.
Who is it?
Oh, man, which one of them?
Which one of them?
So many guys to choose from.
Too many to choose from.
Yeah, how are you doing, dog?
I am good.
I was just at work, and I think we just got hacked by the Chinese because we were about to send all this money.
And Hong Kong is on us, okay?
We got servers all up our ass, guys.
I really got to go, okay?
I got problems to solve, dude.
I got to call the FBI.
Wait, for real? Yeah. I really got to go. Okay. I got to, I got problems to solve, dude. I got to call the FBI. Uh,
for real.
Yeah. Like I just found this out and,
I was like,
the guy was like,
Hey,
I was just about to click my mouse and I saw this and now we're like pulling it back and
it looks like our servers and stuff.
And guess what?
I'm the only one at our company that knows.
Whoa.
Uh,
so I gotta go.
All right.
Later dude. Dude. Hey, wait to go. All right. Later, dude.
Dude, hey, wait.
Oh, man.
Guys, you guys are freaking legends, dude.
Oh, thank you.
I listen to this thing every week.
I freaking love it.
I mean, I can't even.
I think, Joe, dude, I'm here in Chicago, man.
I'm trying to monitor your Twitter, dude.
I'm trying to see you out here.
Dude, he went to the bathroom.
Oh, listen, I love you bros, dude.
Keep it up, dude. The Stoke could bros. Dude, keep it up, dude.
The stoke could never be higher, dude.
Love you, dude.
National stoke levels are rising.
That's awesome, dude.
Thank you, brother.
Thanks for taking the call.
I love you, dudes.
Good luck, dude.
Love you, too.
Hell yeah.
Oh, I'm on it.
I'm on it.
All right.
Later, dog.
Peace, dudes.
Bye.
Hannah just called.
Should we call her real quick?
Yeah.
Should we try to prank her?
Yeah, let's prank her. And she knows we call her real quick? Yeah. Should we try to prank her? Yeah, let's prank her.
And she knows we're calling.
We're going to get her good.
She's going to be so confused.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
All right, here we go.
What's up?
Hello, is this Hannah?
Hannah Dickinson?
Yeah.
Why are you talking like that?
This is my voice all the time.
And I have a...
This isn't about my voice, but whatever.
You recently rented a timeshare from me and my partner in Lake Havasu.
And you and your friends wrecked it.
And one of your friends either jizzed or squirted everywhere.
He jizzed.
He jizzed.
It was jizz. It was aed everywhere. He jizzed. He jizzed. It was jizz.
It was a huge load, Ms. Dickinson.
Huge.
Well, yeah.
My friends do good work.
Whoa.
Nice.
Nice.
How are you?
Did we get you?
Yeah, did we get you?
Were you pranked?
I mean, no.
You didn't call from a private number next time.
Yeah, we're getting better as we go along though
we'll figure it out
pranking's hard
then we'll get you good
why are you pranking
is this just what you're doing now
well we're doing the podcast
we're stretching our legs on the podcast and trying to try out different stuff
guys
I get a lot of requests to be on your podcast
this doesn't count as a guest visit
you're on right now the floor is yours whoa Guys, I get a lot of requests to be on your podcast. This doesn't count as a guest visit.
You're on right now.
The floor is yours.
Whoa.
How are you calling me?
We've got a thing here.
Specific.
Yeah.
It's a cord.
I'm a tech guy.
The thing is tech for cord.
Who's on the phone? Hannah. Oh, hey, Hannah. This is Joe. Oh, hey for cord. Who's on the phone?
Hannah.
Oh, hey, Hannah.
This is Joe.
Oh, hey, Joe.
What's up?
Oh, not much.
I just went to pee.
Now I'm back.
Well, Joe, you didn't seem very excited to see me when I saw you at the comedy store.
I didn't.
I saw you for like a second.
You were like running around like Miss Busybody.
What?
I don't know.
You were just... Well, you didn't stop. I was working.
Alright.
Are you in town still?
No. I'm in New York.
How was Clusterfest?
It was alright.
It was fun.
It was fun. It was great.
Yeah, I saw you change your answer once you realized
you were being recorded.
Yeah.
Nothing I say is going to be honest from this point out.
What else is good?
Can you give any advice to the young stokers out there,
Hannah?
About what?
Life.
I don't know.
Carried deodorant with you?
That's good.
It's good.
It's hot.
People smell here.
I started getting stinky yesterday.
I got really stinky in Simpsons Go.
Do you like it when a guy smells a little bit?
Because I like when I smell a little bit.
No one likes your smell, JT.
But the pheromones, for ladies, isn't it like it ignites? B.O. is the pheromones isn't like for like ladies isn't like it ignites bo is not
pheromone yeah bo is yeah she's not talking that's probably a good thing for me to hear and for other
people to hear too yeah jt do you also like your own fart smell i could see that no i don't i don't
like farts at all in fact i don't fart and no one in my life farts. Dude, literally, Chad and I have never farted in front of one another.
I could see that.
We've been friends for years and we've never farted in front of one another.
Never.
And still.
Because you haven't had sex yet.
Yeah.
Right, wink, wink.
No, we have.
Yeah, exactly.
Exactly.
We have boned.
You were there directing, Hannah.
And suck it.
I stole that from David Tell well
this has been fun boys
you didn't get me but
next time
call from a private number
nah I don't want to be dishonest
we'll get you with the social security thing
and say that you owe the IRS like 5 grand
that is true
so you could get me on that
okay good we'll be ready because it's coming
good to know
and I always swallow my load so that would never
happen
strong sign off
you just turned on a lot of the listeners
yeah well tell them to follow me
bye
bye Hannah good talking to you see you at the comedy store turned on a lot of the listeners. Yeah, well, tell them to follow me. Bye. Bye, Hannah.
Good talking to you. See you at the comedy store.
Anybody else, guys? Are we good?
I think that was good, right? Yeah, that was good. That was fun.
Yeah, that was a lot of fun. Dude, good move.
Good new calling people.
I think calling people is fun. Did you guys try to prank
Hannah, too? Yeah. Nice.
Didn't go great. Yeah.
She knows my number. Yeah, yeah.
I think one stoker suggested doing, like, a the week oh that's fun yeah yeah maybe we could i mean we have a meeting
to get to yeah dude we could call someone and act out our side of the movie scene and then just have
them like not knowing how to respond to it yeah that'd be fun yeah that could be the way we prank
people by like acting on them yeah i love it yeah that's great um all right i gotta go i think from now call in episodes are going to be calling out episodes
yeah yeah yeah and we'll curate who we call a little bit but we appreciate the stokers that
called in we love you guys thanks for so much for calling in guys it's great stuff and hudson
uh i appreciate the tenacity dude you know i love, I love you. Yeah, sorry I got like, I was a little mean to him.
Yeah, I felt kind of aggro towards him, but deeply apologize.
I'm just not used to it.
Quit messaging the broads.
Yeah.
Or I think Sally can handle it, but.
No, she can't.
Well, she hasn't said anything.
I think she thinks it's funny.
If it gets to a point then yeah
but i think at this point it's still pretty innocent and fun yeah and new yeah sorry if we
got aggro with you hasn't sorry dog guys as always we were brought to you by manscape making sure
your trims are pubed making sure you take a nice razor to your nuts and you don't cut your nuts
you just cut the hair and you make it look good like a freaking garden gnome in christmas time trims are pubed trims are puked okay yeah what yeah i'm down
joe have you manscaped recently yeah yesterday actually i remember you said you're doing that
yeah yeah you only have to do it what like four times a week to keep it
taken care of yeah Yeah, it just grows thick, yeah.
This was fun. You're an avid man.
This was super fun.
Yeah.
Thank you guys for listening.
And, yeah.
See you guys later.
Yeah, fun times, guys.
Boom claps.
See you guys later, guys.
Bye.
If you need advice
These guys are really nice
You wanna know
What to do and where to go
When you need someone to guide you
There's lots to have and throws beside you
Go and see
Go and see I'm going deep. I'm going deep.
I'm going deep.
I'm going deep.
I'm going deep.