Going Deep with Chad and JT - Ep. 92 - Strider Joins, Guinea Pigs, Dong Talk
Episode Date: September 11, 2019What up stokers, in this episode we are joined once again by relaysh maestro, Strider Wilson. We start off with some epic dong talk, dive deep into the prison economy, guinea pig love, some relay...sh discush and much more! Dive on in. Boom clap and jabwow. Check out our t-shirts at www.chadgoesdeep.com
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oh sugar me up and lick me down baby this is chad kroger coming in with the going deep
chat and jt podcast guys welcome to episode 92 i'm here
with my compadre jean thomas what up what up dude and uh we are once again joined by the
the relish freaking architect frank lloyd right dude dude that's what's up dude frank lloyd right
would freaking work himself he
would use the landscape his his surroundings did his famous house falling water in the chicago area
he also was the first one to put a garage attached to homes did you know that really ahead of his
time usually the car the garage was farther away i mean made for more interesting horror flicks if
you ask me oh for sure you know is um is halloween the same film
although i think that was in the 70s so that already happened but anyway dude uh it's too
high of praise dude i mean he's such a forward thinker dude you know i was i was just wondering
so there's a lot of great artists people say oh he was ahead of the times or she was ahead of the
times but do a lot of people ever say oh that artist they were behind the times dude interesting dude like is there a great artist
who or a great innovator well not innovator because that would mean that would necessitate
forward i guess i don't know but i feel like is there an artist who's behind the times and is that
maybe what everybody so why everyone loves dave chappelle's special so much yeah where they're
like oh he's like in an acronym anachronistic he's kind of saying no yeah he's saying no he's a little big loud voice saying no yeah that's what i was thinking i don't know if
anyone's ever said it like that but i think there's people who like that's what they're
feeling they're not playing by the rules yeah that society is creating for them and they're like
no it's 1990 for me still right there probably has to be dude i mean like you know some sort of painter that was just
painting like very very very real portraits with insane good oh that's true you know what i mean
yeah because like todd haynes like he's he rips like uh i think his name's douglas cirque style
from like the 1950s but he's making movies now so he's like doing throwback stuff they're like old souls or quentin tarantino
yeah there's a lot of spaghetti westerns yeah in a sense um is that homage if you're behind
the times is it considered homage or ripping i guess it depends on if you've done original stuff
true originality if you're even doing stuff that's like rooted in classical techniques or
themes or or just aesthetics you're still putting a modern twist on it, though.
Totally.
But some people just straight throwback.
Dude, it's our Dan Carlin style.
We have our brains that we think of from our time.
It's so difficult for us to place ourselves in the context of that era.
Imagine 200,000 men on horseback, well-trained men, attacking your your city what would be your psychological state of mind
would you stay and fight or would the terror of the sound of their hooves hitting the earth
in concert scare you into cowardice dude that's a spot on. That is a spot on. That's a Daryl Hammond level.
If you're not familiar with Dan Carlin,
JT just freaking drilled
it, dude. What's the podcast
again? Hardcore History.
Because it's hardcore.
He's straight up autodidact, dude.
He taught himself all this stuff because he's straight up passionate,
dude. And he does not shy away
from the gruesome details
of history that your textbooks might skip over
or just give you the statistic of.
He dives into it.
If you did a history podcast,
what portion of history would you emphasize?
Because Strider would do dank-ass relationships through history.
No question.
Like a World War II relationship.
Oh, how you maintain a relationship while you're at war.
At wartime, correct.
And specializing in like...
Specializing in like...
Say anything alive with the power of glory and love.
Oh, fire.
Maybe tackle the Dear John letter as a chapter.
Yeah, you specialize in letters.
Yep.
Yeah.
You could be like the guy and her in World War II.
Great call.
Interesting.
What would I focus on?
Probably ancient Greek philosophy.
Right.
Fire.
Socrates and Aristotle.
Beast.
Just laying it down you know um just the original bros just waxing poetic i think i'd like to dive deeper into that and tell
people what's up talk about virtue and whatnot dude i was gonna say though i did i did an homage
to buster keaton today i tripped but it was modern because i was wearing vans really did he invent like the pratfall
is that him i think he was the first dude to do it in movies and do it like really well right i
mean i think that's probably been around for since caveman commedia dell'arte italians yeah like out
in the street dude just making it happen dude you're a killer my dogs do legends dude what period would you do dude I
think I would focus on nudity throughout history but not like not like in a
sexual way I just be like what dudes were dropping dong yeah every era so
like I drop you in the 1200s you know what is that is that medieval and you're
like who's dropping dong at this point what what city what country what attitudes
yeah i love that dude i feel like if like people from the past were to see how we drop dong now
and like what's in style they'd kind of be like get real guy they'd be disappointed yeah because
like in like greek times you see those sculptures like average you know uh humble dongs and then
now it's just like these monster hogs like we
have joe who's not here right now but we can feel his hog presence but people are kind of like
that's what you're putting out in the culture like yeah when the 1980s happened and bigger was better
yeah it kind of affected everything but it really affected dong droppage dong totally dong standards there's no question about it you know
i couldn't help but think like through history about dong dropping and one of the dankest movies
of all time of course braveheart features a they actually employ that as a tactic of uh intimidation
when they all lift their kilts which i guess would be a dong raising because they the kilts to show i never perceived the scene that way that they were trying to threaten
the british with the size of their dongs i thought it was more like disrespect towards their like
the person who was trying to have the paternal like uh station in the relationship oh i thought
it was fuck you i thought it was like they were shoving it in their face that it was a well-known stereotype
that Scottish hogs were way bigger than British.
That's what he said.
And I think the important takeaway here is when a dong is dropped, it isn't just a shock display.
There is multiple angles and multiple takeaways when a dong is presented.
Well, that's why when I've done analysis on the times that I've been naked,
away is when a dong is presented.
Well, that's why when I've done analysis on the times that I've been naked, I always try to apply pretty rigorous dimensions to it.
You know, I don't just take it on its face.
I'm like, what was in play here?
What was I trying to accomplish?
Correct.
A lot of times, and not always, sometimes it's comedic.
And, you know, this could be argued, what's one of the most important things in comedy?
Timing. You don't just lead with a dong drop although you could it's a power it's a power move it's going
to be a hook but when you would drop dong it would be at a really precise time and really really
drive home whatever point you were making like thank you sorry officer i don't have my pants i
can't show you my id that was yeah, yeah. What goes through your mind?
I'm curious.
Is it a comedic,
you know,
is it like you want to make a comedic,
have a comedic effect or do you really want to be like central?
Like,
you know,
like Daniel Day-Lewis,
I guess when you drop your donk,
because you're like the nudist of this squad and say,
thank you.
Yeah.
Um,
for me,
it really splits into two categories the
first is like it's a party and i want everyone to feel like anything goes you know what i mean
not so far as like you can do mean shit you can't do mean shit but insofar as like get loose you
know what i mean so when i dropped dong i remember one time before a fourth of july party i had
we rented an airbnb and we were looking to to throw down and everybody was kind of tired because we partnered on the third but now is the
fourth and i didn't know if the guys had in the reserves so to kind of get everybody going i threw
him a fruit bowl which is where you put your parts between your legs and you moon somebody
and the joke is it looks like a fruit bowl i don't think it looks like a fruit bowl but that's
just what it's called so that's what i'll call it i've heard it called the goat is it looks like a fruit bowl. I don't think it looks like a fruit bowl, but that's just what it's called, so that's what I'll call it. I've heard it called the goat, too.
It got everybody hyped.
Yeah, I was there, and I have to say everything is ringing very true.
My friend's girlfriend actually came up to me and she said,
Hey, JT, when you did your fruit bowl, that was the funniest thing I've ever seen.
Really?
Yeah.
Wow.
I was like, really?
She's like, that was so funny when you did
the fruit bowl and i wanted to be like why but that's inappropriate so i just kept it moving
and i mean to quote a dank movie that we saw a man on the wire why is such an american question
when you're doing art and i will go as far as to say when you drop dong there's definitely an
artistic element to it um why why feel the necessity to ask the question why
just knowing your essence and knowing your being it's it just is right yeah i'd like to say just
because it does right correct i'd like to talk about if i may the etiquette of the viewers
um because i've seen instances where drum dong's been dropped um i actually
called it the goat the fruit bowl right but i like fruit bowl it actually looks more like a fruit bowl
the goat i'm not really sure maybe if you're looking at goat from the back it looks like it
perhaps maybe it comes down to if somebody uh has circumcision or not i mean not to get too blue or
too graphic right right but it could um change
the imagery yeah yeah so yeah goats they look like dudes hogs when their legs are but anyways as far
as i understand it surfers say fruit bowl snowboarders say goat oh for real oh that's a
clear distinction yeah i'll take that and i think it's because there's more goats where you snowboard
and there's more fruit bowls where you surf the ongoing cultural battle
a fire call yeah goats are up in the mountains hopping around on rocks and yeah who doesn't
have a fruit bowl out when they're freaking unbelievable inclines yeah oh it's unreal like
when you watch goats traverse a mountain face yeah you see that hawk yeah you see their penis yeah
it's their body is built for their surroundings and i would say jt's dong is built
for his surroundings it's a very maneuverable not to get too detailed comfy confines of my
girlfriend's vagina comes right out yeah yes yes yes i um yeah so the etiquette like this guy he
flashed a fruit bowl and this guy luke so taylor dropped it beast you know very artistic i think i know where
this is going i don't like it luke comes in don't even kicks it i knew it no way nice job luke his
dong was long enough to get kicked lowbrow much whoa yeah dude and on chill we had like uh me and
like four other guys this was freshman year college we
had like a long talk with luke we're like dude like that was an artistic display like you don't
just go to the moma um and just tear down the leonardo da vinci correct the mona lisa's in
it's in bulletproof glass yeah for that very reason you don't go up and kick it yeah um that's live art um and uh he
was really sorry and he like he went on a bender after that but we got back there's an impulse in
a certain kind of guy and you know i've been guilty of being this guy then when you see an
exposed sack you want to smack it you want to injure it you want to make it go away. And I wish we gave kids kind of training grounds to de-learn that impulse.
I know.
I don't know what it is.
It seems innate.
I mean, maybe they're water polo players.
You know, the dodie tap is a common water polo move.
I was never into the dodie tap.
I did not like the dodie tap.
I know I sound pious, but it's the fact.
Maybe it's an evolutionary thing.
It's like I see the potential of your procreation right there,
and I'm going to squash it.
Right.
They're going right after your next generation.
Wow.
A lot of people think Darwin came up with his theories on evolution
from going through the islands.
What were they called?
Galapagos.
The Galapagos.
On the HMS Beagle.
He'd see
the different uh species on each island and see the way that they evolved differently
i think darwin actually came up with his theories on evolution on the boat the beagle on the way
over there when he saw the dodie tapping right he's like why are these men dodie tapping each
other he said to stop the other one from reproducing because it's all about that
evolutionary advantage. Yeah.
True.
And there's nothing like a crew of dudes.
They're literally a crew.
I would say that's probably the straight up etymology of the word.
That's a phylum right there.
Thank you, dude.
And so what other crew of dudes than your own bros do you start doting with, figuring things out together?
And so, yeah, dude, I think that's what you're saying is very very very dank i've heard that if you're if you're colorblind that means your dad got kicked in the sack while giving a
fruit bowl sean have you heard that i have never heard that no yeah it's uh wait sean is your mic
on you hear me yeah i hear you oh is it coming through yeah i'm just checking dogs all right
um but yeah if you have colors if you have trouble seeing the color red
it's because your dad got freaking twanged when uh you flashed his fruitball while fruitballing
and if if uh someone's father was from the midwest or the color of iraqis he would have been
of course goading i think there's a japanese film that translates to Honor Through Life.
And it's about a guy tracking down the guy who dodie tapped his dad really hard so that he can dodie tap that guy.
But in the end, they're both trying to dodie tap each other in a big mud pit.
And they keep missing each other's balls.
And they end up beating the shit out of each other to death and you realize that if you try to dodie tap everyone who dodie taps you
you end up dead dude that's a really really uh interesting point and it just sparked something
in me and i fully agree with what you said and it's tough that two such high trained uh martial
artists because they're so high trained are missing each other and hitting each other and
you would presume effective points oh They're not martial artists.
Oh, they're not martial artists. Sorry,
I went in with my blind judgment.
I apologize. I repeal that.
I've never seen it, but that's what I think.
I love that. You know how
in Brazil they invented, what's
the... Capoeira.
Capoeira. And then there's like Krav Maga.
Do you think
these things, you know they had to hide it
like they had to devise capoeira because there was like slave owners and they had to like perform
dance but really it was defense mechanism i'm not sure what no you're right dog came from yeah
but would you say that like just straight up regular karate is with just like i took karate
i became an orange belt three stripes, and then I started playing soccer.
And you would just do like,
Barney was the name of my sensei,
Sensei Barney.
And he would just teach us like,
really, you would get in a low stance,
you'd be low,
and you're usually a kid.
And when you throw a jab,
that's directly to someone's dong.
You know what I mean?
Like that's...
I could feel it in that thrust.
I don't know what my point is
or if i'm 10 dong strikes dude jt will you please share the story about your sensei yeah dude i
think i've told it on here before but um my brother and i were uh both uh testing for our
junior black belts it's like the black belt you get before you're not a lesson because you're not
a real black belt but you've put in the years and uh it was it was intense and it was two days you go there all day you go home then you
come back you're all day and there was also some uh psychological aspects to it because sensei john
had my brother and i in there and then um he had us write an essay and he listened to us write the
essay and like through the door he listened he's like who wrote the essay and i'm like all three
of us sensei john me jeffrey and my brother and then he's like, who wrote the essay? And I'm like, all three of us, Sensei John, me, Jeffrey, and my brother.
And then he's like, no, you wrote the essay.
I listened through the doors.
You were bossing everybody around.
I was like, oh, okay, I'm sorry, Sensei.
I don't think that's true, though.
I was like in defense mode, but he was right.
And then I was like, fuck.
And then he's like, JT, what animal are you?
Because our Kempo system was based on five animals.
And I was like, I'd be the crane because I use your power against you.
He's like, no, JT, you would be the snake.
He's like, if you were on a desert island with your brother,
you would kill your brother and use his body for meat and his skin for a tent.
And when they came to rescue you, you'd be smiling.
At this point, my brother and I start bawling. We're like, no. I you'd be smiling at this point my brother and i start
bawling we're like no i'm like i would not kill my brother my brother he wouldn't kill me sensei
john sensei john was like he would kill you chris
it was deep deep trauma deep deep trauma you're gonna imagine sensei john like his studio apartment
later that day he's like i taught those kids a valuable lesson you gotta imagine how much i must
have been annoying that guy for five years for him to just lash out like that and fucking destroy me
he gave me the black belt down he was always cool to me but that was one moment where he really broke
me down do you think he in his house alone he's just doing moves like dude yeah and him his wife mo was also at the martial arts academy she
was a black belt so badass they were a uh advanced family when it came to self-defense do you think
they think sparring was foreplay oh for sure no question i think about it all the time. If I dated Ronda Rousey,
I'd be like, put me in an arm bar.
And then I'd tap.
Now some kisses.
Fuck yeah, dude, that'd be so chill.
Let's go.
That would be so sick.
Guys, what else is going on? How you guys been?
Freaking chilling, dude.
Football season started, fired up on that for my tasty action and my tasty fantasy.
What do you think about Antonio Brown getting suspended today
for threatening his GM?
I saw OJ Simpson's reaction.
It's on Barstool, that's what I saw.
What'd OJ say? He's like, come on, man.
You know,
first I draft Andrew Luck,
then I got Antonio Brown.
What are you doing? Just cash...
Football complaints? Yeah, he's like,
don't just cash your fancy checks
and go home, man.
Dude, part of me thinks OJ is such,
and because he's probably a psychopath,
that he's just doing that
because he knows it, like,
can get people to be on his side a little bit,
like, garner some support
from people, like,
making him connectable.
Like, I think, like,
he doesn't even play fantasy.
Yeah.
He's probably just like,
people know fantasy.
Yeah, I'm going to take the fantasy angle
and they'll like me.
Yeah.
And it's like, yo, dude.
I was thinking about how crazy it is that he's just posting videos now on Twitter.
Why do you need that attention?
Yeah, it makes you hurt for the family, like Nicole Smith's family.
Because you're like, oh, they don't need to be seeing this.
And this is the only time in history where they would be seeing that.
You know what I mean?
True.
Like 600 years ago, you wouldn't have to deal seeing this and like this is the only time in history where they would be seeing that yeah you know what i mean true like 600 years ago you wouldn't have to deal with like
yeah their social media posts but it's uh yeah it's tough hey twitter world it's yours truly
so strange but yeah dude ab man the freaking guy dude i mean i think the owner is kind of
being like dude you gotta be or not the owner but the gm like dude just a lack of professionalism
dude i mean yeah so you think it's all both i didn't read the story so was was the gm was being
a little bit like combative with them like in his interviews and stuff even the stuff that you see
in hard knocks totally you take little you take jabs at them you know but so did jerry jones with
ezekiel elliott and it didn't implode this way i mean i agree with you i do i think i think the gm's not the sharpest guy
but ab is just so weird dude he's too weird like i meant to say last episode like the central
character in this season's hard knocks is antonio brown's weirdness correct so true to the guy
you just see him you're like what is going what is going on yeah he's weird but he's so successful
and so like amazing at what he does
you're like well i guess that's how you have to be to be the best but there's other guys who have
been great who aren't like that like jerry rice is like he wasn't like dancing with the stars and
it's very charming and nice that's the point i made last year i made the same my my legend of
the week was julio jones for not being weird yeah yeah he's still amazing yeah but everyone comes
from a different you know antonio brown came from, like, nothing, and, you know, who knows?
Yeah.
I don't know.
No, that's the thing.
He's the best receiver in the NFL for the last 10 years,
so maybe he should be able to be, like, eccentric.
But he's taken it to such a degree, it's like.
Totally.
It's too much.
Yeah.
But speaking of O.J. Simpson, so speaking of prisoners,
did you guys read this article on the prison economy?
Yeah, dude.
It's insane.
Yeah, the guy studied.
It's an article in The Guardian, and he studied Angola prison, which I guess has a population the size of like USC.
Yeah.
And then is bigger than Manhattan in size.
Really?
Yeah.
It's that big?
Yeah.
I missed that part.
And he just talked about the different ways that
people make money there spend money and how it all operates i mean dude the wages the prisoners
are getting and i mean you know you're reading this article and you're like oh these are criminals
they you know he front loads it saying a lot of these charges and it's this is about the state
of louisiana it's not like a federal thing or a national national or like you know in california
where we are just straight up legit chilling by the coast.
And but it's like the prisoners make like, what, 20 cents an hour.
Yeah.
And then the rate of inflation of how things like back in like when that was established
in like the 60s, like a pack of cigarettes was they were making like four cents, but
a pack of cigarettes was 50 cents.
So you could actually make that in like, yeah, it used to take a day of work and now it takes
a week of work to get a pack of cigarettes so they haven't like matched it which they need
they need to like i think the prison systems are like so and you know beyond my knowledge like
grossly insane it's crazy that there's privatization um but like dude yeah i love the
underground markets yeah it was all pretty fucked and then like the infractions you know they're
like if you get one infraction it could set you back to zero.
I was like, Jesus Christ.
That was the craziest thing.
You have to be perfect for 10 years.
Yeah.
And some of the mistakes aren't even like intentional.
Yeah.
And you're like, and that sets you back.
Like that would be pretty demoralizing.
You get called trusted.
Like this guy was, he was trusted because he had 10 years, like immaculate record.
Then he gets accused of stealing a wrench from like the tool shop.
Yeah, just the accusation.
Yeah. Yeah. So like, it's brutal. if you start at the bottom you have to work there's not an option not to work at the prison um which i think is a little unfair because i think if you want to be derelict
that should be allowed but uh the first job you get is like picking cotton or picking uh green
beans yeah and it's a tough job because you have to like kill weeds and throw them and if you just
accidentally hit some dude with some dirt
and then he decides to brawl with you,
that means that you can't get out of that job for another 10 years.
Yeah, and then it could reset your penalty time to zero.
Is that what?
Yeah.
Did I read that correctly?
Yeah.
Fuck, man.
So gnarly.
Yeah, the whole article made me be like,
I don't want to go to prison, which I guess is a good lesson.
I stay away from all prison TV shows. I never watch any of them i'm like that is my worst nightmare i'm not
watching it yeah because my dog loves miami and miami's like the opposite of prison every
anything goes in miami yeah nothing goes in prison i would not do well no i wouldn't either
because i don't think any of us would but but you'd have a better shot than me because like
we'd both be on the loved side not the lover side and i think you would get loved by a stronger
prisoner than i would what does that what does that love include all the bells and whistles
yeah just protection and all the trimming and like lots of daps oh for sure yeah definitely
dude definitely um dude. Definitely.
Dude, but I mean, it was interesting about the dots that they have, like these systems.
Like now they're talking about currency.
We're obviously from dank movies like Shawshank Redemption, which is one of the most legit movies of all time.
They would trade like prisoners would trade cigarettes or paper or toilet paper.
And like they go into they break down like currency and like what makes currency valuable has has to be like divisible it has to be like everyone needs to buy into it like it needs to hold its own that like everyone you know has to have um i guess like trust among the users
of it it has to uh hold value in its own thing a cigarette is a value in its own right and then
there's like one more and it can hold future value yeah and it holds future value so it doesn't just
diminish so you can store it and still make you can store it and still have your value protected and
cigarettes qualify as that but now like i guess in this prison they banned cigarette smoking in
2015 so they need to like adapt and people want cash so they've like got these prepaid cards on
the internet and they're just like they'll have someone on the outside text them and i think
phones are contraband too baby oil is contraband because it could slick your arms and
make you difficult to wrangle for the guards all sorts of gnarly things and uh it's a bummer in
case they want to wrestle yeah or in case you want to drill yourself really really nicely good
call and he's up yes legit dude yeah so like um it was interesting when i heard about that that
guys are using prepaid gift cards as like the currency to pay guards so they can smuggle in drugs and stuff.
And I had a friend who actually did that for porn when we were in high school.
He would buy gift cards, and that's how we would pay for porn sites.
Yeah, so he was kind of on the same level of innovation as these prisoners.
Because you can't trace it, and the money can be spent anywhere.
It's pretty interesting.
Yeah, I like the idea. Sorry, kids. If you're young and you hear this don't do it no don't do that yeah you have to do i'm just giving my friend be credit for being a creative
thinker but you know what i think that energy could have been better served elsewhere absolutely
probably wouldn't have been as funny on the podcast now true you're an economist yep um
yeah i like the idea of how things like when you're in prison,
the value of these worthless items just goes way up.
Totally.
It's funny how it's like a small economy.
Yeah.
It's like its own little country.
It's got its own system.
Yeah.
The guy selling pecans was the king.
Oh, the best.
He would pre-sell the batch. He'd get money in advance of the pecans coming out. Yeah. selling pecans was the king oh the best he would pre-sell the batch he'd get
money in advance of the pecans coming out yeah or pecans dude i'm coming in with a whole thing
of planters peanuts dudes i'm gonna be rich yes also dude what scared me too was because it because
there was just a small sentence in the article that said there's censorship in the prisons
and i was really disheartened to see how much stuff they don't let the prisoners watch or read
because they're afraid that it will like inflame them or lead to criminal activity.
But it's such a broad description of what can be censored that they censor a lot of stuff that they shouldn't.
Yeah.
Like on the more serious side, like criminal justice reform magazines.
Oh, really?
That like tell you about the bullshit and sentencing.
They won't let them read that because they're afraid it will inflame them.
Yeah.
At least in Louisiana, I think.
But then they
can't look at porn and i'm like all right i get it you don't want a bunch of horny guys running
around but at the same time they're still like human beings like they should have access to what
they want to look at you know what i mean if it's not directly criminal yeah yeah also i feel like
if you've i mean once you've drilled yourself, you're probably a little bit more relaxed.
You know what I mean?
That's true.
I mean, look, everyone's different.
Everyone responds differently.
But, like, I mean, maybe it was just because there's not, well, they're working a long day, too, in this prison.
Like, eight hours a day.
I mean, dude, horniness is raw, pure energy, dude.
You know, you got to get rid of that and channel it in a healthy way, hopefully.
Maybe they have healthier sexual appetites though you know they're not like craving like
lots of anal now because you know they're just they don't have unrealistic sexual expectations
because they're not looking at porn yeah so maybe they're craving more of like you know i want you
know to light candles and you know go watch like like a water fountain and eat some cheese and then
just missionary for like 20 minutes slow.
Love it.
Because they're not exposed to porn.
Perhaps it is a blessing.
And I think that's even better.
You know what, dude?
Yeah.
I'm fired up on that.
I'm fired up as well.
I feel like that's what you like a little bit.
Yeah.
Oh, dude, I love to look at, you know, like if I see a snake plant, dude, and it's a good deal on it.
Sprung.
If I see, you know, my credenza, you know, the lights coming in just right when I'm coming in from work and it's dancing off that the Kermit and the Phil marble that sits on top of that dank mid-century wood.
Yeah, dude.
What if you see a succulent? does that do oh it fires me up
i love succulents especially my place doesn't get the best or shouldn't say my my gf and i's place
doesn't get the best natural light so succulent really and i think an important element in fantasy
is the reality element the attainability element of course it's always fantasy it's just outside
our reach but if i see that succulent i could really see it living in my place and i could really see my gf and i getting fired up maybe even as a centerpiece
have you ever that really fires me up and makes me want to just straight up you know
enjoy you know part in my you know i love hearing that you love succulents vagina dude
dude because you see you evolve into a dude who loves succulents i guess me fucking hyped bro
dude fuck yeah dude i look dude, dude. You guys, dude.
This is like 0%, like not even like 0%.
Sometimes it's a little bit annoying
when someone's like,
dude, one day you'll get it.
But dude, I seriously think so.
And I think you guys
are already ahead of the curve.
Like one day you guys
will freaking just get fired up
on succulents.
I didn't know what a succulent was
until like a week ago.
My GF was like,
I was like, I was like, whoa, babe, what's going on over there?
She's like, that's a succulent.
I was like, what?
Yeah, dude.
And then she laid it down on me and I was just like, I was just like, whoa.
And that was it.
Dude, even thinking about that experience, like that you had with your gf like that that like that unique experience i mean for you i mean if i have a nice unique experience with
like about my gf like that i could take care of myself in the shower to that idea i could take
care of myself in the shower do i just told you no of course not you you know with your girlfriend
that's your intimate moment dude that's your intimate moment dude right but in similar
situations like with me
like when i found that good deals on craigslist with my gf you know i could take care of myself
you know nice yeah so i'm just saying maybe try to be self-sufficient yeah try that out dude i'm
gonna think about a credence tonight when i draw myself i think you'd be well served
i'm glad to know what you're gonna be thinking of what are you gonna be thinking of i already
drilled myself so i might take the night off so you're good what you're gonna be thinking of. What are you gonna be thinking of? I already drilled myself, so I might take the night off.
So you're good.
What, are you gonna watch a movie or a documentary or something dank?
Yeah, for sure.
Fuck yeah, dude.
Yeah.
What did you think about it?
I don't, you know, I don't want to get too...
My girlfriend.
Fuck yeah, dude.
Nice.
Fucking sick, dude.
Fuck yeah, dude.
That's so sick.
So chill.
That's so awesome.
That's what's up, dude.
Yeah. That's so cool. No, there that's what's up yeah that's so cool
no there was two of my girlfriends
in the fantasy
whoa
and they were hooking up with each other
so this was sci-fi style
straight up clone style
that's sick dude
dude it's pretty profound
you guys could have been in Cuba
because they clone each other down there
you guys were like
you fucking hit the boat
you're like
she's like I'm a fiend for a mojito dude
fucking
and you just hit that boat
just straight up Colin Farrell style
what's going on with Cuban
Cuban cloning
because you know how like they say like they do experiments in cuba because of fidel
castro and like they like clone goats down there you guys hear about that really no yeah there's
like i remember like reading straight up articles about that back in the day like because like fidel
was living a long time and uh you know obviously what goes on in that country is different laws
than what we have here and so they're like yeah they have like would do these like mad scientist experience down there what's up i thought they cloned mojitos oh if i
could come sorry but uh anyway i was just really going with uh did you say clone mojitos i love
that it's a great call sorry to interrupt either no dude i mean i'm pretty much done i'm just saying
you know dude speaking of a country that could use clones we read another article that's in
switzerland it's illegal to have just one guinea pig for the simple fact that switzerland's government doesn't want the guinea
pigs to be lonely i love it so you gotta have two guinea pigs so that they can kick it i love it
and that took me such good protection under the law dude that took me right at the heartstrings
because i had a guinea pig in college at our house cream pie his name was larry and uh it i was like man i really did larry wrong
because we didn't get larry a buddy um he raged with us a lot you know um you know he chugged
out of his little like sucker metal straw and hit that freaking wheel a bunch and then like
raged with us like we brought him out and he just fucking you know got pumped but brought the ruckus yeah i'm just sad to know that larry didn't have a uh
a squad member with him but it is chill that he was taking care of the turtles he didn't even
know about it he had that metal straw dude that little thing like that oh dude yeah he like tongue
darts it and gets the water out of it that's how you get it g pigs are definitely environmentally
conscious it has to be one of the most thoughtful laws in the world like for the government to be so
tuned in and just microscopic in their protections that it also protects guinea pigs like that's very
thoughtful government work dude and then like i love what the article did yeah i love this photo they talk about how
guinea pigs when they're lonely when they're by themselves are prone to feelings of isolation
and loneliness and they they put a photo of three guinea pigs right next to each other
and they all look like they just got out got out of some sadness totally you know what i mean like
they look like they're like dude i was by myself for a while and it sucked. And I love when articles do this, when they have an image that really accompanies what the message is.
You see a lot of this when guys get accused of sexual harassment.
They always use, like, the grossest photo of the guy.
Totally.
And you're like, he did it.
Yeah.
He sweats a lot.
Yeah.
He's got a lazy eye.
They're bolstering the thesis of their freaking article.
For sure, dude.
Dude.
But, dude, you are correct.
These three guys are just chilling with each other,
definitely looking like maybe they watched
freaking Manchester by the Sea or something
or whatever that would be equivalent to
in guinea pig experience,
maybe just posting up alone.
And then, dude, an example of how regulation
can sometimes spur innovation,
now there are services in Switzerland
where you can rent a guinea pig
to keep your other one company. I saw that's a fire job dude if you cruise around with a bunch
of guinea pigs just posting up in like your like imagine just birding around with the crate of
guinea pigs just cruising making other guinea pigs happy that's fucking sick dude in switzerland
must be a nice place if they're they're out of laws to make so they're like guys what should
we do next or like this guy's like guinea pigs dude and we were giving them some heat on the
last episode because of nestle trying to steal all the water yeah but we go both ways with
switzerland yeah hey i give them credit when they do the right thing when they protect guinea pigs
dude yeah i also like how they have a law that you're allowed to own one cat
it doesn't need a companion
however they do want it to be able to
see other cats through a window
now how do you enforce that you don't but it is written
in there
but that's what the suggestion is
it's strongly suggested
how much time do you do if you
don't comply with this guinea pig law
because I don't want somebody to end up in an Angola
style prison where they're
having to you know
fight for a Russell sweatshirt
for five years I think you go DMV style
with this you write a ticket and you gotta go
watch some videos dude you know like a
driving school type scenario
you gotta have a divorce dude in a room
talking to you about hey this is what
you gotta do
we're all here we all gotta drive safe and here's the is what you got to do. You know, we're all here.
We all got to drive safe.
And here's the thing.
And I try to do stand-up comedy.
But these are the guinea pigs.
So it's like that type of scenario.
You know, sad guy, 45, divorced, you know, failed comic,
just in there, just teaching you about guinea pigs.
Dude, I had a driving school teacher who, like,
told the most rando stories where he'd be like,
one guy was driving past me doing 75 and flicked me
the bird. And he was clearly
working out some
stories that he still had anger over.
So he tells me to pull over
and I get out of the car
and he says, what's your fucking problem? And I say,
sir, don't curse.
Next thing you know, he
beats the hell out of me.
He beat me to within an inch of my life.
How's that for road rage?
You're like, dude, whoa.
He beat the hell out of me.
It was my birthday.
He just keeps adding sad elements.
The passenger, who was a driving school student, was terrified.
And I tried to assure them everything would be all right until the point where I lost consciousness.
I want to note it for the record.
I could have defended myself better physically.
However, I felt concern for the student there, and I wanted that student to feel comfortable.
Therefore, I took the beating.
I was teaching him a lesson.
Yeah.
Don't fight back.
Take the beating.
You did wrong on the road.
Do I go to the corner of Crescent and Oakwood and smoke a cigarette on the anniversary of every evening that that happened?
Yes, I do.
Yes, I do go do that. And and yes i do reflect upon it by myself it's cathartic now we're gonna get into left-hand
turns yeah exactly yeah three-point turns let's talk about them uh dudes we read one more article
and this is the most important because it was about
a guy we really admire brad pitt fuck the man new york times just big spread on him
sounds good dog thanks i mean it's pitt dude he has that effect and he sounds like a guy who's
really got it together i'm very happy to report that brad pitt is doing well dude i love him more
and more every day this article made me love him dude it made me just when i pulled up the picture i was in third grade dude and i forget what movie just
came out but brad pitt was in a movie and he just like dude when i was in third grade i saw brad
pitt and i was like this guy's fucking cool yes and there was some kid named jason in my class
and his last name was close to mine because we were all sitting pretzel like waiting to go into the classroom and he even knew who brad pitt was and this guy had a great quote and he goes
brad pitt women want him men want to be him he said this in third grade dude hilarious this kid
jason my mom my mom talked about brad pitt not she loved brad pitt she still did she still talked
about him a lot as well yeah she loves brad pitt and uh i would you know my mom would get people magazine every week and i'd read about
and read up on what brad is up to and i'd just be like you know but even in recent years though
he's just i feel like he's really shown his um how deep he is well he's gotten sober his range
some clarity on his feelings yeah and with acting too his range
oh yeah he's killing it he's having a big year he's got a james gray movie coming out that could
be a banger yeah and he just did really good work and once upon a time in hollywood maybe his career
best work so and subtle it's weird to think brad pitt's having a moment but i kind of feel like
this year could be his like best year that he's ever had oh i'm just so far though his hair
deserves an academy award for sure 55 years old yeah and he's hotter than any 30 year old oh no
question and he genuinely seems like he doesn't like he appreciates that he's the hot cool guy
but that he's not he's still not totally comfortable with it yeah the article really
makes it seem like he just kind of keeps getting thrusted into the spotlight
and he kind of reluctantly is like, all right, I know I'm the coolest and the hottest, so
I guess I'll be there.
Dude, I don't want to, you know, you talk about this, dude.
You talk about how these hot, how hot dudes don't always have it that easy, dude.
And this is a case in point, dude.
Yeah.
It's the burden of their, their hotness gives them increased visibility at all times and
increased expectations.
Yep. And I think that can really grate on people. Their hotness gives them increased visibility at all times and increased expectations.
Yep.
And I think that can really grate on people.
And, dude, I used to get mad at him when he would, like, do the actor beard.
Correct.
He'd put the actor beard on and I'd go, what are you hiding that from us for?
Yeah.
I felt selfish.
Let me see. You felt entitled to it.
Yeah, I did.
The jawline?
Yeah.
Yeah.
And you thought he was kind of being like spoiled by correct by not showing it
to us correct like kind of thumbing his nose at us i felt the same way maybe he just needed a break
yeah i like that i like when they talk about his uh how he grew up with a very stoic dad and that's
sort of like he's like you know don't say much just you know hard work stay strong fight through
it and now he's getting into emotional vulnerability yeah which like i
kind of relate to not to like compare myself to brad but like um no because my dad's super stoic
you know and he's just like i'm just gonna do surgery give me a scalpel and i'll fucking do it
um but like you know and i was like i was like yeah i gotta be the same way you know stay quiet
just keep working and freaking hang dong.
But I've been learning about emotional vulnerability more like this year.
And it's so freeing.
So if you can find a combination between the two, I think it's a dynamite combo.
Yeah, because you're kind of getting out of a prison.
Yeah.
Of your own kind of like fear.
Like I went back to my high school this weekend.
Yeah. And I kind of went back to my high school self when i was there i was surrounded by all the kids and i was back on
the same campus and i i got all mixed up and i felt all weird and i realized like i was such a
pain in the ass when i was a teenager yeah and for a lot of reasons but i think one of the biggest
reasons was is that i was super sensitive and i didn't have any i didn't feel like i had any place
to talk about that sensitivity i didn't even feel like i knew how to talk about that like i didn't
feel like i had a language to talk about it yeah i didn't know what words to use yeah it fucked me
up yeah and then i read about brad now like 55 finally being okay with like being a sensitive
guy and being afraid and all these different things that everyone feels even brad pitt and
i'm like man we really do a disservice to all the dudes
that we don't feel safe being that way.
Yeah, it is a very pleasurable feeling to talk about honesty
and talk about what's going on.
Yeah, you feel good.
Yeah, and you process it.
I sort of internalized all of it.
It's sort of like the opposite reaction where I would just get like, I was just quiet.
Right.
And I would just be like,
he's so shy.
And I'm like,
yeah,
cause I have a lot going on.
Okay.
Yeah.
I would act out.
I would like run around naked or like break something or be loud.
Yeah.
Yeah.
And you guys have,
remember we did those personality tests.
You have the similar personality.
Yeah.
You're a more extrovert,
more introverted.
Makes perfect sense. Yeah. But dude, you you're all you're making fire points too and
and uh and uh pit it said in the article like when he's describing what he's wearing
and he's like he has a roomie tattoo a rummy i don't know his name r-u-m-i yeah he's the
and i looked this up dude because i was interested in during the article he's a 13th century um he's from persia uh islamic mystic sufi mystic poet
and what like his main quote is and i don't know what brad pitt has tattooed on his arm i'm not
sure i didn't look that up but it's exactly what you guys are saying it's like dude you're saying
these moments from your high school childhood you're saying these difficult times and you know
maybe this is more exaggerated but he's like like, Rumi's big quote is like,
keep breaking your heart until it's open.
And it's like, did you keep having... That's the quote that Pitt had?
I don't know if that's his quote.
Oh, that's one of Rumi's quotes.
But that's like the main Rumi...
Like when you Google Rumi quote, that's the first one.
Yeah.
But he's got...
I was reading all of them.
There's so many.
I was so afraid to break my heart.
Yeah.
Bro.
I was so afraid.
But that's what emotional maturity is.
It's you become
more comfortable as you get older with kind of who you are and how you react to things and when
you're younger it's so hard to do but you go and not like break your heart like i need to go get
dumped but like as in life experience go try things fail a little bit grow from it learn
and then you'll become human and dude it's a constant effort thing, it's a constant effort thing because I'm discovering now in my relationship
that I wasn't fully letting her in
because I was afraid to get my heart broken.
Totally.
Just all in and be like,
all right, all my stock is with this.
Not all the way where my whole livelihood's on this person,
but my romantic heart.
And then I was like,
oh, I'm not going all the way with it.
I'm not fully trusting this person
because I'm afraid getting my heart broken. dude it's why it's very salient i gotta do it
i gotta just you have to break it i gotta get in there like a kit kat bar and just crack it
snap it open but it's one of those things that when you say it now we're like makes it makes
sense you gotta do it but in the moment it's so hard but if we get ourselves hyped on it right now
then we'll all take this energy and it'll help us do it.
Yeah.
Dude, he's like the original dude of Stone Cold.
Let's do it.
Yeah.
Do you know why Kit Kat bars are so good?
Because you break them.
Right.
But honestly, there's no better feeling.
I've learned this a lot in my like a month and a half in sobriety of like personal growth where you can feel yourself like getting
like like and so when you're able to sort of like switch your point of view on like
shitty things that happen you know when like heartbreak for example when you're able to be
like yeah this sucks and this hurts um but this is making me wiser so like i like i'm grateful
for this pain because yeah now i'm you know my emotional intelligence
is skyrocketing even though i want to go you know uh just play mario kart for the rest of my life in
the basement and that's fun to do in moderation like the yeah i was like more of like a depressing
like hiding away no you're right for the rest of your life sounds too long yeah yeah and it's a
disservice to all the people who want to see you above the attic or above the basement talking to us.
Yeah, it's retreating back to comfort.
That's what I was thinking.
Play Mario Kart 4, play with your boys in the living room.
Yes.
And get a rotation going.
There's a Hemingway quote I like where he says,
The world breaks us all and it makes us stronger in the broken places.
Yeah, yeah.
Yes.
Dude, Rumi says,
Where there's an open wound, that's where the light gets in. broken places. Yeah, yeah. Yes. Dude, Rumi says, where there's an open wound,
that's where the light gets in.
Yeah.
Says that, dude.
Jordan had to get beat by the Pistons
to come back and be a champion.
Yeah.
You don't win the championship on your first go-around.
Look at Giannis this year.
You gotta get your ass kicked.
And then he learned some lessons
and then he come back.
That's why whenever I get sick,
I hate it so much.
But I'm like, this is going to make my healthy times 10 times better.
Because now I'm like, I was sick and now I'm healthy.
And now I'm just so amped on life because I have full function.
Totally.
You're not taking it for granted.
Right.
It speaks to what a beast Brad Pitt is.
That his low point is like the year he produced 12 years a slave and they started in world war z
he's like that's when i knew i had to change i was like still we're doing really small
i'm like dog you're still crushing it but i appreciate that you want to crush it even harder
yeah and you know what now the movies are a little bit better and his performances are a little bit
better yeah and then i read an article about him from that he did with gq in 2016 when he first
got sober and he sounds like he has more clarity now,
although the difference is they were quoting him verbatim in that first one,
so maybe he'd sound goofy in this one too if they did.
But he was smart enough not to let them do that this time.
You can feel his clarity now,
and you can sort of see it.
Once Upon a Time in Hollywood, looking at him,
as opposed to movies from five years ago and stuff,
you can just see he looks vibrant and healthy yeah and just like uh just wise and like he's realized that life is more about feeding your
pitbull in like the coolest way possible oh fuck yeah that pitbull in that movie is so sick yeah
no dude i love pit i love pit but like we said with switzerland dude you know we're gonna recognize
the positives we're gonna recognize when it's negatives now pit
in that article with his sobriety he was like on a what what exactly happened on that plane he was
like he was yelling i heard he was yelling at angelina jolie and then one of and he was drunk
and one of his kids who's 15 stood up to like stop him from yelling and he knocked the kid
back into his seat, but hard.
I mean... I gotta say, though, I mean, I'm not trying to speculate,
but Angelina sounds a little icy.
No, I think she did tear him down,
but I think he let himself get torn down, too.
Yeah.
Because he wanted to break his heart.
Yeah.
But I think...
I'm sorry.
No, you love Pitt.
I love Pitt.
I love Pitt, too. I think we all Pitt. I love Pitt too.
I think we all do.
Dude, we were crescendoing on Stoke, and I hate it to get us fucking right here.
It's actually pretty interesting.
Like, I was on a vacation with my dad, my brother, and my brother's girlfriend.
And I asked my dad, I was like, whose side were you on when Jolie and Pitt were first pregnant?
I'm like, whose side are you on?
He's like, Pitt.
And then I went to my brother's girlfriend. I was like, whose side are you on? He's like, Pitt. And then I went to my brother's girlfriend. I was like,
whose side are you on? Jolie or Pitt?
And she went, Aniston.
Whoa.
And then I went back to my dad. I said, Dad, whose side
were you on? Pitt or Aniston? My dad went, Pitt.
Just across the board, support
of Brad Pitt no matter what.
I think we all feel that to a certain degree.
We're like, if Pitt does something wrong, we're like, nah, dude, it's Brad Pitt.
You know everybody else was fucking with him.
Come on.
Come on, it's Brad Pitt.
And I do believe it.
I do think he's a good guy.
I do think he's a good guy.
Was your dad saying Brad Pitt from Troy in his whole sentence?
Was he saying that?
That's what my dad was thinking about when he saw it.
Brad Pitt from Troy.
It's nice with Brad Pitt, too, that you can choose between like the two ideal male body types you can go
with muscular and Troy you can go with skinny ripped dude fight club I want to talk about this
dude I want this is like very stupid and a weird thought but I had it in my mind I was like you
know there's religious iconography and like you know and Hinduism you know there's like gods look
a certain way because it's symbolic like one will have eight
arms or appear blue because of a reason or um you know and it islam there's muhammad and like you're
allowed to draw uh the god for certain religious reasons and then orthodox christianity they have
like a lot of um you know in western religion there is too but like i don't know about like
i was you know raised catholic and stuff but like all the you know jesus is always like white and stuff and it's like well that's factually
wrong like he would be a middle eastern he's from the middle east he would be more tan and look what
more what you know modern america would look you know uh stereotypically claimed to be like a
muslim even though he was jewish and all this but right and i was like dude can't we just take the
liberty in ourself look when i remember when I was a little kid,
I thought God was just the priest at our church.
Like literally when I was praying at night, I was like,
God looks like that old priest. And that was fine.
It didn't matter what I thought he looked like.
And all I'm saying is why can't you just picture God just being like,
you know, Steven Seagal or something with a sick haircut,
just ripping in a Jaguar. Yeah. You know, he's still omnipresent.
He's still omnipotent.
Steven Seagal, if you want to...
He's a character, dude.
But his look. He's got some
bad... You don't want a Wikipedia Steven Seagal.
What'd he do?
He made his assistant a sex
slave or something. Oh, dude, then yeah, that's
a bad call. And this is way less of an
offense, but if you watch the
Daniel Cormier john
jones first fight for light heavyweight champion they uh keep cutting to daniel cormier's training
partners in the audience who are both ufc fighters and they're giving him advice and then you just
see right next to them and here above them steven seagal go combinations like giving advice
to the guy in the ring dead serious that's how we got to hollywood
he was somebody's trainer michael ovitz the guy who uh made ca big started ca tom tom segura has
a great bit about him have you heard it no oh it's so good what's he saying but he's just like
he's like uh how he became a cop in like louisiana and made a show about it and he's like well you
might not know about me because I'm a cop.
He's all bloated now and doesn't have the same range of motion.
He's training these Marines or whatever.
These cops for self-defense.
He's like,
if a guy comes at you, you got him in the throat
like that.
He'd kick him in the groin like that.
I heard he can fight pretty well.
It is true.
Based on athleticism of all the martial arts actor stars,
he's probably the least range of motion.
Yeah, he didn't age well.
He never threw a hide kick in any of his movies.
I don't think he ever threw a hide kick.
Yeah.
He did a lot of flippy flip, hands in your face stuff.
Yeah.
But he was great at it.
David Spade, I think, said he was the worst SNL host ever.
So hard to work with.
Really?
No comedic timing or anything.
Just brutal.
He took himself serious.
He's like, is that a joke about me?
They're like, no, it's not.
He's like, all right, no one's making fun of me.
He's so sensitive.
You know who God is for me?
Who?
Stone Cold Steve Austin.
Oh, I'm fired up on that.
Oh, dude, in Austin 316?
Just crushing brews in heaven.
He's just crushing brews in heaven all the time.
He's one of the greatest orators that ever lived.
I really believe that.
He's giving the devil the stunner.
Chad, can you lock me into the...
That's amazing, dude.
What else is cracking?
Just chilling, dude.
Freaking...
What's the score on the game yeah someone's gonna check right now
oh do i've been rock climbing i love it yeah i love rock climbing and stoker some stokers
reached out i also met a fire rock climber slash stoker at the gym making what up dude
um thank you for introducing me or me you're saying what up to me my first time at the gym
he just approached me he's like if you ever need help with climbing let me know and i was like
thank you dude but nothing better i fucking it's so it has everything you know it's a good workout
you chalk up your hands um it's there's creativity works out these muscles you know it's just like and you you get you know freaking up to big heights
you know it's it's fear it's creativity dude i think this goes back to you know you wanting to
study the greek era you know for how chill it was because there's guys bronze sharing their thoughts
you know in public settings and there was discourse you know yeah um but dude also at the same time
you got to think you know there was the olympics they of course had olympic lifts but dude they would straight up rock climb dude they
would get a natural straight up workout and i think that's what that goes back to like just
seeing you just glistening do they let you take your shirt off in that gym or no oh for sure that's
sick yeah dude you got your shirt off you're climbing up that wall you're taking the more
challenging course or not yeah i love that dude i just i want to find an outdoor one so i can because i mean there's no better scene than mi2 so tom cruise rock climbing it's such a
good opening so sick and i mean dude cliffhanger what a dank movie dude so dank so dank dude what
i love about rock climbing too is that like the best rock climbers they don't they're not like
jack dudes that you know are
like super intimidating they look like kind of like thoughtful maybe like artsy dudes who have
grip strength for days dude yeah i think i remember you were telling me about when you were rock
climbing i was fired up on it and i was like i was watching american ninja warrior and they were
talking about you know this uh this lady that was competing and. They were saying her grip strength,
and she probably weighed like 100 pounds,
and it was the exact same as an NFL lineman's grip strength.
Really?
You told me?
Yeah.
So pound for pound, she's stronger.
That's crazy.
Legit, yeah.
I've got to pee real quick, too.
My dog.
Dude, when you come back, I'm peeing, too, dude,
just so we can keep it going.
Drain the lizard.
Do you need to pee?
Should I go now?
No, but let's chill for a little bit.
Dude, I'm fired up.
What are you going to crush tonight?
Are you going to watch a movie?
I'm going to keep reading this book,
The Breaks of the Game, by David Halberstrom
about the 1980 Portland Trailblazers.
Nice.
It's so good, dude.
The details are amazing.
That's sick.
Yeah, and you really...
He's so good at writing about the characters' point of view
and who they are and stuff like that,
and he does it quickly. it's like in a paragraph but dude the best part is is that we know
clay thompson and there's details about his dad in there because he was on that team
that are so different than the michael thompson that we kind of grew up around yeah yeah like he
was a wild card when he was a young man and now he's you know he's on the radio and stuff
so you know he's got personality but he's so uh just kind of buttoned up in a way you know what
i mean he's always pretty strict but in this book you're like oh he wasn't always that way
and so he was a young man yeah and dude i mean speaking of michael um thompson and uh dude i
mean the bahamas with hurricane dorian dude dude. Tough. Crazy, man. It's brutal right now.
So hopefully they're getting some good relief.
I was listening, like, Tom Brady set up, like, a foundation.
I guess him and his family always go there.
Really?
Yeah.
Something to look into.
Maybe now's a good time, too, to give some love to the Halim family.
Oh, yeah.
Alex, dear friend of ours, passed away.
And, yeah, he was just a tremendous guy.
And I know it's cliche, but, like but like seriously this guy had so much energy yeah and intensity and just like megawatt personality and it's like
a huge light to go out big time it's yeah he will but definitely you know be missed selfishly by us
but he will live on and you knew
you knew him better than i did yeah met him in fourth grade i remember like the very first day
i saw him he was in someone else's class and the way our classrooms were built up like there were
doors connecting all of the elementary school school classes and he was just the only student
allowed to just walk around and just like talk to teachers and like hang out like he was like
unreal he was like he should have been a troublemaker but authority figures liked him
and i think it's because he was so charming so charming and so unbelievably smart he's a surgeon
like yeah i was a went to uva for medical school and was a hand surgeon and yeah i think his mind
just worked so quick he's like all right i got it Let's go to the next thing. Yeah. He needed a lot of stimulation.
Yeah.
But he was one of the funniest guys I ever knew.
Oh, so funny.
Literally, I was just running back the memories I have with him, and he's so goddamn funny.
Oh, just genuinely hilarious.
Yeah.
We were outside a bar one time, and this drunk guy was hitting on our friend, and he just
had a plastered face.
And our friend Alex just couldn't stop going, wait, dude, wait dude seriously but hold on that's not really your fucking face is it
and the guy was it's so mean but the guy was so hammered he's a hole and then alex i'd be like
alex stop stop stop and then a couple minutes later the guy would respond so what was everybody
doing and alex would just start laughing go dude please come on you're not serious
he's like that's not really your face right please come on man i can't look at your face and the guy was that's all he was hilarious and alex just
would call it out yeah oh yeah but he was also a really nice guy too and really cared deeply
about his friends and he could feel that from his really close buddies at the memorial like
mike asperger and eric ruland james pre Prado, and Tom Hall. They, they, Fab Five.
Yeah,
they had a really special connection,
and the way they talked about him,
really spoke to what a great guy he was.
Oh,
totally.
Um,
dude,
should we get into some questions?
Yes,
but can I take a leak first?
Yeah,
I'll do,
I'll do the mid-roll.
Oh,
perfect.
How you living,
dog?
I'm good,
how are you?
Good,
that was a fun shoot today yeah it was fun
i almost feel like like you're right like it's two different things too yeah yeah
let's get into the questions dudes all right my dogs first question subchattinjt this is my second
time writing and i don't know if you guys have read my first quest but it's all good my stitch
right now is i'm i'm sitting behind my friends kind of drunk while they play 2k and i'm just not having a good time at all this is usually how
these things go when i'm in this environment drunk me goes to dark places mentally similar
to jt when smoking weed for a few weeks that's true um not good for my mental health i tell my
buddies often i want to rage with a big crowd and maybe some chicas for a better vibe,
but they just want to sit around and get stoned and drunk
and play 2K. Nothing wrong with that, but that's
all they want to do and not my play.
I'm not trying to be a schmole, but this environment,
this isn't healthy for me. These guys are the real
ones, though, and the only ones I hang with anymore,
and if I'm not with them, I'm at home reading
Sigmund Freud or contemplating the infidelity
of existence and wanking it.
I think I'm a schmoll and i don't
know if i should just detach completely or keep trying to find ways to have fun with them sorry
for the long explanation but i just don't know what to do by the way your guy's pot is fucking
great and he made me a little more positive since i've started listening puzio's a bitch but deserves
redemption because we all got a little puzio in us and jt read on the road by jack kerouac it's
got some epic quotes and i think you'd love and appreciate the philosophical antiquities in it.
What?
This guy's a legend, dude.
This guy's a smart dude.
He's a good dude.
Yeah.
I would say mix and match, dude.
You obviously want to try different things.
You don't want to sit around playing 2K
and that total respect for that.
So put yourself out there.
Find some people who maybe you want to go do
square dancing at the local saloon um or you want to like sort different
colors of m&ms i don't know what you want to do but go do those things but you also love your
squad it sounds like so also kick it with them but it doesn't have to be the only thing don't
feel so boxed in um because in because self-care is important.
So you've got to make sure that you're feeling fulfilled.
And then you can take care of your dogs in the correct way.
Dude, I think that was a fire response and very quickly created.
Oh, thank you.
Dude, I think these guys do sound like cool dudes.
And if they're not really fulfilling you all the way you want to be fulfilled, maybe read
that Sigmund Freud behind them while they play 2k and they'll maybe at first they'll
make fun of you, but they'll get used to it.
Just do it a bunch of times.
Just bring that book to them and then you'll feel like you're improving while you're chilling
and you'll, you'll, you'll check both those boxes.
And then dude, maybe, you know, uh, you got to push outside a little bit of your comfort
zone.
Maybe try to find some new people who will be your going out people when you want to
do a bigger thing.
Yep.
And, uh, yeah, that's tough, man.
I mean, I've, I've gone a couple of years without having those people in my life and
I just, you know, dug more into the reading and the watching movies and the learning stuff but uh but it is a vital part of life so you know they're coming just stay on the lookout
for them and when they do come you know just have fun here it is dude and this i think you know this
question came from the universe on a certain day what did we lead this podcast talking about dude dong dropping dong firing
your crew up jt on the 4th of july dropped his dong it fired everyone up maybe you got to go up
in front of 2k and do you know depending on what region of the country you're in either fruit bowl
or goat your bros and don't just do it and say now let's go do something be like look be a little
proactive be a little proactive
be a problem solver you want to go out to like a rager or something let them know when the rager is
let them know the facts get them a little fired up tease them a little bit let them know there
might be future gfs there and then you fruit bowl then you go then the squad's fired up and you know
that's going to work for a night you know and then other nights you're chilling and kicking it but
when you want your variety sometimes a little dong drop which maybe
can help you out in that scenario yeah in a nice and close setting like that with people you trust
yeah you could do some puppetry with it too you know like makes a match you know do the hamburger
do right the helicopter if you are endowed like joe the wristwatch yeah a great movie move i wish
i could do i can maybe bleed do a um a pink pocket watch yeah
pocket watch maybe yeah and dude that's part of booze is that it sparks feelings of like
uh being isolated or or not being fully fulfilled you know that's that's a chemical component of it
and i'm not even saying it's altogether bad because sometimes it's good to reflect on that
stuff yeah and kind of clarify and like kind of really realize what you need but i think it's cool that when you were feeling that way you wrote
into us and that you you know drew up that pretty fiery email and that you sent it off hoping for
some feedback i think that's pretty productive use of that feeling yep that's proactive fired up
i like how thirsty for knowledge he is yes yes that's one of the
highest signs of intellect dude is intellectual curiosity dude what up my dudes let me proceed
this by saying that i love the pot and your mission is spread stove anyways i'm writing
to you guys in regard to a tricky love situation so me and my best friend have been super tight
for about six years now we've seen each other date others and whatnot over the years but it
was always cool because we were truly just friends it's pretty much always always been platonic between us. However, recently I've realized that there
definitely seems to be an underlying love component. Not to worry though, truly strong
friendships can have love too. I'm not talking physically right now. However, others see the
connection when we go out and they see it very romantically. Literally everywhere we go,
everybody thinks we are the best couple. We actually were told we were the cutest couple
at a fancy party we went to this summer,
but people couldn't believe that we weren't actually together.
That's just one of the hundreds of examples there are.
Getting on to the issue at hand, I just left,
and we will be apart geographically for the next seven months.
Distance has never hurt our connection before.
The last two years had the majority of time spent being distant from each other,
and if anything, it brought us closer together.
She's truly one of the best human beings I've ever met and never ceases to amaze me right before i left she
asked me if we could do a music festival together when i get back of course i'm stoked on that i've
always wanted to go to this festival and going with her makes it pretty much perfect after being
around each other so much the last several months i'm scared because i'm developing romantic feelings
and i don't want it to ruin this french this festival the friendship or both i would love to
hear what you guys have to say of this situation i'm sorry if it's a bit long-winded
but it's as short as i can make it to try and explain it all keep spreading the stoke and good
vibes i think this goes back i mean i know i've repeated it a few times but you got to break your
heart kind of thing you know i mean i think there's i think i think probably subconsciously or maybe
even it's starting to become consciously you both want this relationship but you're scared
of um losing it or losing what you have but um you know if it's you've got romantic feelings and if she feels the same way,
I'm not sure if she does.
I think, yeah, but, you know, I think you've got to go for it.
Although they are going to be away from each other for a while,
so maybe not try to, but, you know.
It's six years, though.
I think you're right to feel like this guy's really into her.
I feel like you're really into her.
It sounds like it, yeah.
I think you might even be in love with her.
Yeah.
And I don't know how you tell her that.
I don't know what the best way to do that is,
but I think you need to find a way to do it.
Yeah.
Because I think it could go on unresolved,
and you guys could just end up dating different people
and ending up with those people.
That's a,
a route.
That's actually not as bad as it sounds,
but I think it's better if you tell her how you feel and then you go that
route.
If it doesn't work out.
No question.
And it sounds like she might be into you too.
That's what I'm thinking.
Yeah.
Yeah,
dude.
It was a no brainer from the get go.
It's a not,
it's not a matter of if you tell her how you feel
because you do it's only a matter of when and now when and how and i got two uh suggestions for you
my dog first the how not i wouldn't do that the music festival i wouldn't like go there and make
it about that thing and then you know just i mean maybe the moment creates itself but i don't know i would
just steer clear of the music festival what i would do is and you probably know what in your
own mind think of a dank time that you guys had together a dank spot that you went to together
that you really enjoyed something not even romantically or just in your friendship or
you know maybe a pokeball place you guys always crush or a burrito place you guys always crush
something mundane something simple that you guys do together and the next time you're there you let her know at that spot
but how does he say it i would just say exactly what he's saying in this email
i fully i love you as a friend we love each other as friends i love you as a friend i don't want to
jeopardize this i can't be honest with myself and i won't be honest around you if I don't tell you that I've developed romantic feelings from you.
It kills me if this changes our relationship going forward as friends.
I totally understand if that makes it weird for you.
This is a risk that I thought about for a long time.
But I have to tell you this because there would be an element of dishonesty in our friendship that I don't want to bring into it.
You know how I asked a girl to win her formal time or to, yeah, to winter formal. She was
driving me home and I was like, hey, so like, and I was totally, we were friends. We were just
friends, but I really liked her. But I was like, I was like, what are your plans for winter formal?
And she's like, oh, I think I'm going to go with my friend, Max, who goes to another school. He's
like a really cool guy. And I think we'd have a lot of fun. And I just got swelled up with this feeling that i needed to ask her and i was like i just ran with it i was like
you know what we should just go together and she was like what i was like why don't you and i
just go to the dance together i think that'd be fun i think that'd be a lot of fun and then she
was like okay like i think there'll be a moment where you're just like you can't take it anymore
and yeah but it needs to be in this calendar year.
And then you just say something.
Just fully mean it.
I like both ways.
I like the way you said it.
I like the way you said it.
I'm going to throw in a little, you know, fun way you could change it a little bit.
Love actually.
Show up to her doorstep with boards, everything written out
and you're just looking at her
you know, just shuffling through
telling her how you feel through poster
board. Also, dude
I mean, look, all of these are great
all of these are very grounded and amazing
but never count out the
option, which is always an option
of getting yourself an all leather outfit
and a high powered street bike
revving your engine outside of her house at 3 a.m waking up all the neighbors being one for
theatrics and letting her know on the spot say hop on let's take a ride she says go fast you say hold
on tight and you guys rip it i mean i'm fired up on that scenario sean what do what do you think? I've kind of been in this situation
where I was friends with someone for a little while,
and then we got together, and it was very short-lived,
and then a lot of time passed
where we were still really good friends,
and then we started getting close again,
and all those old feelings are coming back for me,
but I didn't know if it was happening on the other end so i um knowing that she's not one to be good with
confrontation i actually drafted an email and i sat on it and i kind of i just wanted to be true
to myself without like making her uncomfortable and i thought this ended up being the best way
to do it and um and then i sat on the email for like a week just like making sure like you know there's
no mistakes in there or i'm explaining myself you know as accurately as i can and then one night i
was just sitting there and i just hit send and i was like all right i did it i did it and um
um because she's not afraid of because she's afraid of confrontation in a lot of ways um
i i pretty much gave her an out to not have to
like respond to it you know i didn't i didn't want her to feel pressured at all um and in her own way
she kind of responded in a way that kind of amounted to like i respect the fact that you
did this and that you told me all this and i don't want this to hurt our friendship either.
So I think as long as you're being true to yourself and you're respecting her comfort,
you got to say what you got to say.
And did you feel better for having sent the email?
Oh, that was absolutely the moment I did it.
I mean, definitely my heart started racing
because you can't put that back in the box
once you send it out.
But,
um,
like even now that was probably like,
like a year ago or something.
Um,
I can like live in my own head,
you know,
more easy.
Right.
Knowing that I did that for myself.
Yeah.
And there's no fear of like,
what if exactly?
Yes.
Yeah.
Good on you,
man.
Yeah. Hell yeah, dude. fire it up on that that's
awesome what's up my dogs i'm a long time stoker and a first time query maker just want to say i
love the pod and i've been able to take my stoke to new heights with the help of you two greek gods
now i write into the masters of raging with a you're too kind with a simple but truly important
quest i'm throwing an end of summer bash this weekend at my dad's house while he's out of town
i was wondering what are some
things you fellas look for in a typical
and a totally epic rager. The house
has a huge backyard with hot tub, fire
pit, and large lawn for
games.
I like what I'm hearing.
I'm thinking all of that plus some grilling and maybe
a kiddie pool is a good start, but what am I
missing to really set this rager apart?
I was wondering what tunes you guys love to hear at a fire summertime backyard party.
Thanks for the help and keep up the good stoke.
Billy the Goat.
Yeah.
Billy, I think you're going to have no problems throwing a great party.
I think your head is in all the right places.
I would just tell you this.
Make sure nothing too bad happens.
But other than that, I think you have a good thing coming.
Yeah, I'm trying to think of an added element you can throw in there.
Maybe throw in like a dancing cage, but not in like a weird way.
Right, not in an objectifying way,
but like it's open to anyone who wants to volunteer to get in.
Maybe a bounce house.
El Squidro has like a similar area.
Yeah, right, right. to anyone who wants to volunteer to yeah maybe a bounce house el squid row has like a similar area yeah right right yeah so that so it's not like trying to get people in there in like a gross way
but it's more like you're not trying to get strippers it's more like we want you to express
yourself now there's anything wrong with that if it makes you want strippers to choose it yeah for
sure if it makes you feel more comfortable you can express yourself in this cage i love that dude i
mean rage cage rage cage i mean dude have plenty of tables set up for Pong.
Dude, have plenty of other games set up.
Maybe tournaments.
Yeah, tournament style.
Love that.
I would say as far as music goes, maybe the outdoor music is more just like laid back summer tunes.
You know, some Mellencamp.
You know, maybe some throwback stuff.
You know, dude, just got to have some Osprey.
Got to have some Sublime on there.
Just mixing it up.
And then inside, maybe there's a dance area.
Maybe there's a dance cage inside
where you're just bumping some beats,
you know, some stuff with some rhythm.
People can really enjoy themselves.
Yeah, and you know,
be mindful of the neighbors too
when it comes later on.
You don't want the party to get rolled.
I'm of two minds when it comes to music.
I like having different rooms with different tunes.
You know what I mean?
So people can pursue the vibe
that most works for them but i also think having
everybody on the same wavelength is so vital to a great party i think for the music that i would
suggest is just play some genuine oh yeah i know it's overdone because of magic mike but i was
bumping it long before that although i do love it in magic mike it's true like that's gonna get
people's hips grinding.
And then his other songs are good, too, like Differences and In Those Jeans.
Both underrated backers.
Some Kevin Little.
Kevin Little, Turn Me On.
Kevin Rudolph.
Kevin Hart.
Yes.
Mix it up.
All kinds of Kevins.
Yeah, Kevins really bring it.
Bacon.
And then, dude, yeah, Iins really bring it um bacon and then yeah and then dude yeah i think
really setting the tempo with your own dance moves and your own excitement like if you're partying
hard because a lot of people throw parties and they get too worried if everybody else is having
a good time and it kind of stresses everybody out and it's hard not to do but if you can be the head
of the party and be having fun everyone's's going to follow that. True. Get yourself a button down shirt, dude.
Maybe Hawaiian vibe like my dogs.
And then every hour, you undo one button, dude.
And you start at the top.
You work your way down until that shirt's off.
That was so far.
Yeah, I would throw in some keg stands there too just like you know just hurt your dominance
in a fun way yeah and it's a fun ritual like when you go to a party and you see people doing that
you're like this is a real party yeah people are doing keg stands yeah correct it's fun and people
are always a little nervous about doing that stuff because they're like i don't want to be bad at
doing a keg stand yeah so don't be afraid to be bad yourself at doing the keg stand
because then you're giving everybody else permission just to give it a try yeah be a
social animal you know get on top of that keg and start throwing out cups you know everyone have a
good time like oprah yeah if someone if you get a cup you get a cup yeah if you see someone like
kind of like meandering about like i don't know what to do give them a cup and just say look
we're all buddies tonight i may not
know you but we're gonna have make some epic memories dude i always took a lot of pride in
that when my friends had like a family member in town that when when we went out partying i made
sure that person was having fun because i think it's a huge part about a good party is that everyone
feels included you know what i mean my first night in college like i was like
you know i i went to my buddy chase took me to this house party and i was kind of like you know
i'm like all right what's this gonna be i walk in this guy's standing on a keg throws me a red
solo cup i chugged down a i think it Keystone light, and I loved college from then on.
You know, from then on, they're out.
I don't know the phrase I'm trying to say.
That was like the BCAD moment.
Yeah.
Yes, good call.
Yeah, that's when Stone called Steve Austin's son.
What's up, Senseis of Stoke?
I've got a confusing stitch on my hands.
It's really boking my stoke, and I need your advice.
If you could keep my name anonymous,
there would be legitimate appreciation from my side as my boys
from OZ also listen to this fire
pod. Basically, my best friend's sister
is a total babe and has thrown off
major vibes that she's keen for me to plunder
her booty. Dudes, the glances she
gives me are epic. They make my
hog stand stiffer than when I see Riley
Reed help her stepbrother with his homework.
I regularly visit their apartment and find myself
going there in the hopes of her being there more than my dog the more i see her the more i feel
like she might be the one but my dog sensing these intimate vibes from our silently sexual
communication has told me that he's not down for me to get diggity with his sis total boner jam
usually i follow my heart and let my dong piece do the talking but he recently found out i
clobbered his girlfriend before they were dating i didn't tell him earlier out of respect and hope for their
budding romance and his vocalizes concerns about his our lack of reciprocation regarding respect
towards each other let me be clear dudes i freaking love this dude and never intentionally
disrespect him i told him that i want to pursue his fire assist romantically to no avail and feel
like if i do raid her treasure chest and sleuth load and my dog finds out he won't forgive me as this is the one sexual misdiscretion too many what should i
do dogs you're my only hope in these trying times peace i saw some uh looks coming from you i mean
do you first of all we do appreciate riley reed's work i like that reference um i don't think you
know i mean all the step-sibling stuff
that you see on the adult websites
feel like it's being forced on us. Maybe there's
people into it. I'm not judging.
I'm not judging.
But anyway, dude.
That aside, I do appreciate
a lot of the
vocabulary he used
making that a very entertaining read.
And some of it I thought could be improved upon. I don't think clobbered was the best that's terminology yeah he's he's controlling
his own narrative i don't believe what he's saying that he wants to pursue his sister romantically
because you're using a word like clobber no you want to make love you know some of it you know i
appreciate the effort but it was just uh it was a telltale sign dude i mean it just threw up a big
red flag if you cared about your buddy, and he told you.
There's plenty of girls out there.
I mean, the words you're using just make it sound like you really don't have her best intention.
And it sounds like you've heard advice that we've given before,
and you knew how to counter some of those things when you wrote
this so that you could get an answer that you want but dude my dog i'm not going to give you
the answer you want i think it's a no-go dude i think it's a no-go and i think you got to change
your outlook a little bit you know think about uh you know if people are going to get hurt you know
um if you're actually looking for something real with his sister,
as opposed to just like a,
a big time plunder,
you know,
that might,
you know,
you,
that you,
it might happen.
And then you'll probably feel kind of shitty about it afterwards.
And it won't be worth it unless you're actually pursuing something real.
And you know,
we didn't hear once in this article.
All we heard was we didn't hear anything about her dude if you were really stoked on her you would have written
a lot more naturally about her yeah how she got you stoked dude not to harp on the language thing
too much but the title of this email was also slamming my best friend's sister oh dude dude
yeah bro any guy who was talking about my sister that way it if it was like slamming JT's sister, I'd be like, I think I'd prefer this guy not to do that.
Yeah, dude.
The email title should definitely be making love to a girl that I'm into.
She's my best friend's sister.
Yeah, like should I marry this girl or should I cut out my heart and die alone?
I'd be like, all right, I'm listening.
Yeah.
Correct.
Who is this guy?
Sean, what do you think?
Man, I think, think well first of all
bro code first and foremost um and if and if you're trying to you know modify the bro code
and tailor it to this particular friendship then that's going to require some honest and
considerate conversation um and i don't know that's kind of the only thought i have on it
well dude that was well said. Fuck yeah. Fuck yeah.
You have to have that talk, dude.
Either, either it, maybe it's over Mario cart.
Maybe it's while watching a game.
Maybe it's while crushing breakfast burritos, but you got to have that talk too.
All right, dudes, should we get into the other stuff?
Hell yeah.
Chad, who is your beef of the week?
My beef of the week is with my dog Dylan.
Um, it's good.
It's good. That goes back to the college days one night
dylan and i we were just crushing metallica and bud light platinum simultaneously which is an
electric combo that definitely gets you to ride the lightning voice crack there don't stress on
it i'm charmed by it i love i'm charmed yeah thanks dude and you wrestling with it is even
charming so you know what?
It's great to watch.
I take back what I said.
Do whatever you want to do.
I fucking love it, dude.
Roll with it, baby.
Thanks, dude.
Roll with it.
Thanks.
So yeah, Dylan.
So yeah, we were crushing Metallica and Bud Light Platinums, riding the lightning, just
getting down, starting to get destructive in my room.
It was all safe.
We just destroyed a chair.
It was plastic.
And it deserved to get fucked up.
And yeah, then it was a safe, you know, we just destroyed, like, a chair, it was plastic, and to serve to get fucked up, um, and yeah, we were, then we were, you know, it was a fire pregame, we were getting ready to go out, and, uh, I walk out, and I close the door for some reason, and, uh, I think out of
habit, and he walks through my door, um, like, broke it, like, hulk's through it you know like foot through fist through
whole body through dang and i gotta say it was a fire move i was impressed i was stoked i was
like dude that was awesome but it does uh it's to have major consequences on the privacy of drilling myself.
Yes.
I'm not sure if I said those words correctly.
It's because I'm fired up because, like, I couldn't drill myself correctly for, like, three months.
I think so.
Because there's a freaking hole in my door the size of a human body.
And this, he's six feet.
So he freaking blasted through that door
and every time you know and yeah i drilled myself sometimes and yeah i had an audience
because of dylan dude that just pipes up some memories for me my buddy robbie my brother and
i one time we're like hey we're ditching you robbie we ran into my brother's room
and pretended to lock the door so robbie ran right through the door and we're like it wasn't even locked he's like how was i supposed to know but then it turned
out to be a cool skill to knew to know he had because my cousin was locked in a bathroom and
the water started leaking through the bottom floor because the bath was overflowing and i couldn't
get into the bathroom and i said robbie break it down he cracked the door down and my cousin was
passed out in the back. No way.
But he was all right.
But it was like, thank God Robbie could just handle the wood.
Lay the wood to the wood.
Ride the lightning with wood.
He's got power.
Not much grace.
I played pickup basketball with him.
Fouls every time.
Fouls every time.
But good guy.
My dog.
Who's your Beef of the Week?
Dude, my Beef of the Week is Jerry, dude.
My freaking downstairs neighbor from my GF and I's apartment.
And he's not my Beef of the Week because he chain smokes constantly
and he gets on our AC and blows into our freaking bedroom
when we're trying to sleep or, you know, be intimate.
But he is my Beef of the Week
because he's been doing this unbelievable
thing lately dude it's been summer so it's been hot out dude in la right now it's hot and it's
muggy it's weird we get a late summer dude july was nice august wasn't too bad september october
we're scorching over here dude record he always comes in october in la anyway dude so my front
door is open because that and i'm only going screen door style to let in some cool evening air.
But because I've been doing this lately, I've been hearing Jerry, who's always been Postmates-ing.
And, dude, I'm not even exaggerating.
I think on his last seven Postmates orders, he's ordering a soda.
First of all, dude, just go buy soda at the market and have soda at your house
dude he's postmating postmating a drink which is already a risk in my opinion dude and then he's
complaining when it gets there he's going there's no ice in this i said i want there to be ice in
this when i get here and he has this demanding tone to the postmates person who he doesn't know
so there's no ice in here i ordered it this long ago and it's traveling i'm like dude
have you ever got a drink before like and it's hot as fuck out right now and he's like dude
there's no ice and we'll send it back and won't accept it and just that's so unchill
yeah dude so jerry's might be for the week. I mean, but even then, again, finding Stoke in this,
I have been able to laugh at how absurdly ridiculous it is
that he's so mad that his drink shows up with no ice, dude.
Sometimes you order, like, if he was being smart, dude,
and I didn't have soda at my place,
I would just get a soda with no ice,
knowing that I have ice in the apartment dude and then i got
more soda out of it so does he have a freezer yeah dude hook yourself up do you scratch your
own back baby meanwhile he's just freaking stressing out dude i don't know man he's not
thinking straight dude was he buying like a 16 ounce fanta yeah dude he would like postmate
shake shack or something and be like Just a soda.
No, no, no. He would get a meal, but with a soda.
Oh, okay. Shake Shack or whatever.
Fresh corn dank or something like that
with a soda with ice in it.
Do you think he gets a thrill from the gratuity of what
he's doing? I think.
The gratuitous nature of what he's doing? I think exactly right.
I think he does, deep down, derive
some sort of sick pleasure out of this.
Sad note, one time a co-worker of mine at Valet was hungover and needed coffee really bad,
and he post-mitted himself an iced caramel macchiato, and someone rolled up and they go,
Hey, is Dave here?
It was like a $9 latte.
He's like, Thank you so much.
I love that.
It was amazing, dude.
It was a fire move.
But yeah, dude, Jerry, I mean, dude, he's just got to change his ways a little bit.
For sure.
Dude, my beef of the week is my panic and my anxiety.
And it does this weird thing where I'll be on the freeway and I'll just get super anxious.
And I'll be like shaking.
And then I'll be worried I'm going to pass out.
Or I'll get a thought that I can't get out of my head
that I'm about to turn the wheel or like do something like, um, horrible while driving.
And I just, I hate it. Cause then I just sit there and I white knuckle the wheel and I'm like, no,
you're okay. You're okay. You're okay. And then, so coming home from, coming from Orange County to
LA the other day, I actually got off the freeway and just took the long way home. Cause I was like,
I just can't deal with the freeway right now. then it came again today you and i were at the lachma uh the museum in los angeles and they have an escalator that
goes from the first floor to the third floor so it's a big escalator like one of the biggest ones
i've ever seen um and i was terrified the whole time that i was gonna like jump off because i'm
i'm scared so i can't sit in the fear that's what the problem is so i want to just get out
but you can't get out you got to sit in the fear you know what i mean yeah because there's no there's no start over if you
make a mistake like that so you just gotta sit in it and i just hate that my panic and anxiety
is doing that but you know what it'll be all good i'll figure it out let's go this is part of it
dude you're talking you're sharing the feelings man i mean i think that's a part of a big part
of people that are afraid of heights dude a friend of ours mom wouldn't even drive on the freeway i think yeah i relate to her
so much yeah because it's like and i'm getting more and more of it as i get older like my anxieties
are getting bigger yeah my confidence in certain areas is getting bigger but my anxiety in other
areas is getting bigger too it's like everything's growing together i think it's uh it's definitely a
natural human response though i mean i i've like before we're gonna go on howard stern or something i was visualizing
the worst myself saying the worst things possible just because it's so
it would be like career ending right you know or like rock climbing too i just i can't i can't get
the thought out of my head of like the thing happening, like me falling horrifically or something.
Right.
And does that help you be sharper then and do the opposite, you think?
I don't know because it freaks me out because I'm like,
because I have that in my head, am I going to like, is that?
Are you going to manifest that?
Yeah, make it more likely to happen?
Right.
Or am I so anxious about it that i'll be
i'm like more aware so that i'll be more careful right um i think it's a balance right yeah i lean
more towards the it's making me more careful kind of thing but then there's always that because
i don't know dude i had a volleyball coach this guy really great guy tom ashen dude r.i.p legend
dude um and he would have us this was in
middle school everyone just at the end of practice lay down and visualize and he'd go he first he'd
talk us through he's teaching he's like here's the play serve comes in the pass is received see
your teammate who's doing that pass you're playing this position the ball comes a little bit out of
system means it didn't go through to five feet from the net slightly to the right out of system play where
are you going to go where are you going to adjust and i think it's just that exact practice but with
your stresses of like you know it's tough when it's you know a height thing or driving on the
freeway it's obviously in with the anxiety and panic but it's like seeing what you can control
is what it comes down to because it's not being able to control things and it's like when it comes to stern or doing a stand
up set or something you go everybody has those feelings dude i have those feelings i'm gonna
fuck up i'm gonna say something dumb dude i'm gonna say like if i'm talking like if i know i'm
talking to somebody i'm not allowed to say something it's like they're like hey someone
you know it's like try not to think of elephants exactly immediately but i think you just need to sit down and literally like imagine like tom brady that shit of like
navigate away and of course it's never going to go that way but if you have a path if you see
something you can you have something to get back on track with you know give yourself that thing
to get back on track with and i think something that does help me is like and i do want to get
past it but i do think it helps me to be like,
all right,
I have this anxiety and I can try to pretend I don't and just keep driving on
the freeway.
Or I can just add 30 minutes to my drive time,
even though it kills me to be inefficient and just feel safer on the way
home.
And just accept to myself that I have a certain level of panic that changes
the way I have to behave.
I think that's huge.
I think I've been okay with it and being like,
look, I'm just a guy who can't drive on the freeway sometimes.
That's just who I am.
Like, I'm not crazy about it, but I'm not mad at it.
Whatever.
I love it.
My GF will be all right if I get there a little bit late.
As long as I'm safe, you know?
Yeah, then you just adjust.
You adapt.
This seems like it's something that's coming up more recent.
You know, you plan.
The night before, what's your day look like tomorrow?
Boom, like that.
But now we have a job coming up that we're most likely going to do,
and it's going to necessitate a flight.
Do you think it's going to happen?
Yeah.
Have you heard anything?
I talked to them a little bit about if I can make the –
I have a big work offer,
but it conflicts with going to my friend's rehearsal dinner for his wedding.
So I'm a little bit conflicted.
I talked to my dad and my brother and stuff.
I'm going to call my buddy now and see how he feels.
Oh, did you talk to your reps?
Yeah, I talked to them and they think that we can make it work if I take a red eye on
Friday.
Okay.
So I'd miss the, I'd miss the rehearsal dinner, but I'd make it for the wedding, but I'm one
of the groomsmen.
So it's, it's, uh, it's not an easy choice to make.
Gotcha.
But hopefully my dog's all right with it.
I do feel like I'm letting him down a little bit,
but I also feel like he'll understand.
But we'll see what he says.
I haven't talked to him yet.
I think he'll understand.
But, yeah, you definitely got to talk to him.
You're doing all the right things.
Chad, who's your –
To add on to that whole thing, if you get those thoughts,
maybe you could sort of switch the point of view a little bit and be like be like um this is this is helping me
if that makes sense right no this is making me more aware of the dangers so i'm safer dude
sometimes i actually think when i'm super anxious like that i'm actually driving better than i do
yeah when i'm sort of like when you drive high i've heard like you know you drive better because
you're so paranoid.
Right.
But just having the feeling, I'm like, my brain literally makes me feel like my hands are turning.
My brain's like, your hands are turning.
Your feet are doing weird things.
I get feelings like that all the time.
It's terrifying.
Dude, I always think, like, dude, even in camp rock climbing, I'd be like, what if I just moved this thing down?
Like, why am I thinking that thought?
Like, where does it come from?
You can really, you know, drive yourself wild doing that i know it's just chronic seinfeld's like very weird seinfeld did a talk with wale the rapper which was
interesting and he talked about while i was like talking about crazy thoughts like that and
seinfeld's like who cares every day i walk on my balcony my first thought is jump off yeah i just
don't do it it happens whatever he's like so comfortable with the
neuroses that he almost doesn't have any anymore yeah you know what i mean yeah yeah it's sort of
like that i read this book on like anxiety it's like don't try to push out the thoughts
sort of recognize them for what they are right so that you can live comfortably with them and
just sort of uh um you know you know that they're coming in, but know that they're just thoughts.
They're not, you know, manifesting into actions.
Yeah, take the feeling in, express it in a healthy way.
They live and die without impact sometimes.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Chad, who is your babe of the week?
My babe of the week is the rock climbing wall.
You guys have been courting each other for a while
you know i've been looking at this climbing wall it's similar to the guy who wrote in you know
it's been like does that rock climbing wall have a sister dude that like dude i'll ask
i'll freaking ask dude i'll be like yeah um i uh you know me and the rock climbing wall wet
me and the rock climbing wall met when I was about
seven years old strictly platonic um strictly platonic I climbed and I was like this is legit
and I was like dad freaking belay which is the rope term and we meet again
uh some years later rock climbing climbing wall, and what up?
I'm developing romantic feelings for you now because I love what you do.
You know, you challenge me.
You help me with my creativity.
You help my grip strength.
You help me overcome fear.
And, you know, it's legit.
And I freaking love the rock climbing wall. You know, it's legit. And I freaking love the rock climbing wall.
You know, it's a beautiful thing.
And I love rocks, dude.
Fire, dude.
Geologists, what up?
Big what up to the geologists.
I mean, dude, how do I refer to my GF as my rock?
Right?
I mean, it just only fucking makes perfect sense, dude.
Only makes perfect sense. only makes perfect sense and what
should a lover do but help you grow and you guys grow together wow dude which leads nicely to
strider who is your babe of the week my babe of the week of course has to be my gf and um
i'm not ass i say that but i mean it's just it's without say for me um and dude for this week
dude she my babe of the week for a simple reason of what she did today
dude dank little text message she sends me she goes should we go on a date together tomorrow
night do you know how fired up i get on that dude and before i can even respond dude i'm literally
typing the word movie a question mark into my phone she goes i'm thinking we see a movie
fucking just dialed in like that dude so how are you not my babe of the week when she's just keeping me, you know, keeping it fresh with a fun date.
Dude, even just using, like we were talking about earlier, words are very important.
She could have easily said, let's just go hang out tomorrow, right?
Or, hey, you want to see a movie?
Of course I'm stoked.
Of course I'm fired up.
But now that she's like, hey, let's have a nice little date night, raises the stakes of the evening, going to make it a little more charm factor fires me up sure she's fired up so just really dankly and i relate to the words of that guy
saying bone my email or bone my sister and the or sister and email thing i'm really struggling
speaking plunder her booty plunder her booty even when i said the rock qual thing i meant to make a
callback joke of saying oh is this is this Rockwall's somebody's sister?
Like maybe the trampoline sister,
but I fucked it up.
I fucked it up.
Interesting.
But everyone fucks up.
Everyone fucks up.
Yeah.
But anyway, just my GF
for just being a straight up legend, dude.
Frigging loving and caring
and even in text and word.
So, fart out.
Dude, my babe of the week is podcasts.
Oh, nice.
I love medium of podcasts, dude.
And I'm not even speaking from the going deep point of view.
I'm just saying I love listening to them.
I love being informed by them.
Some of my favorite information-dense ones are like the Ezra Klein show
or conversations with Tyler or Dan Carlin, Hardcore History,
who we talked about earlier.
Or I listen to the 30 for 30 on the Sterling saga when he was forced to sell the clippers and dude it was great
it's great entertainment made the drive tune from Orange County breezy and then the thing I really
love about podcasts though in and is like um when we talked earlier about not being able to talk
about being sensitive and not being able to talk about your feelings. Like the first time I heard dudes doing that was in podcasts.
I was listening to what the fuck with Mark Marin and the Pete Holmes podcast.
You made it weird.
Like they were so unabashed and clear in how they felt and like what scared
them and what they wanted and like career envy and like all these things that I
thought you weren't allowed to talk about.
And they were just letting it rip.
I was like,
that's what made me want to do podcasts and and do stand-up was just
hearing how open those guys got to be I was like man that looks like fucking fun that looks like
the best way to live and I don't think I ever would have got to feeling that way without podcasts
not that I'm always that way but I'm trying and I think podcasts really were the roadmap for that
stuff so I'm just grateful for the form.
And my favorites, though, I got to say, are Bill Simmons and Joe Rogan.
I think those two and Marin are the three best ever at podcasting.
Those are my rankings, dude.
I love it, dude.
And, dude, even right now, we're essentially just hanging out and being honest.
I get fired up every time, dude.
You're like, dude, get your valet shift covered.
We're potting it up.
I go, I'm there, dude.
Fuck yeah, dude.
Don't care how fat the tips get.
Nothing's fatter than my freaking stoke when I'm hanging with my dogs, dude, being emotionally honest, dude.
You know how they say you should find mentors?
I think podcasts has allowed us to find hundreds of mentors.
Yeah.
You know, and I always feel so lucky for that about how there's
like youtube and podcasts so you can find these mentors and like gain this knowledge from these
wise people and you don't have to do it in person so you can just expand your knowledge base times a
thousand now that's amazing have you listened to q a with with Jeff Goldsmith? No. Oh, it's great. I've been listening to it a lot.
That sounds good.
It's with filmmakers.
Nice.
What's one I should check out on there?
Quentin Tarantino one was good.
The Arrival one was good.
The guy who wrote Arrival.
Yeah, the guy who wrote it?
Yeah.
I listened to him on another podcast, on Compliments podcast.
Interesting.
He made there 12 different alien ships that land on Earth because it was 12 studios that
rejected his script.
Yeah.
You know, the whole idea is no one understands what the aliens are saying.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Oh, that's amazing.
There's another one.
The guys who wrote Overboard, which we have met they did a wedding crashers guy right
nice that was a cool one yeah they're great guys they were cool dudes yeah man yeah that will feel
seen in wedding crashers is like oh good good yeah more for me and you dude i like dude i've
seen i've watched that on youtube so many times dude died in a hang gliding accident what an
idiot yeah dude just very few scenes have made me more giddy so totally i'm like just the pathos and pain he's playing but at like this total
shielded level oh it's just amazing with the nunchucks oh dude yeah around the show yeah what
the fuck do you want yeah it's so funny dude and then do you do you really feel like owen wilson
in that scene we're like oh no this guy's out of his mind and then when you see that he slept with
a really beautiful woman yeah what yeah yeah i know it then it was like yeah i will i will have some i love it i
will have some i love his physicality when he's leaning back he's like hey babe yeah you do
whatever you have to do oh yeah yeah and dude and you know this is his point of view but he's like
hurt i got hurt i got hurt at funeral yeah dude the way he's moving
his hand just like this dude his physicality too when he says he died in a hang gliding or no and
he goes oh no when he finds out that vince vaughn's getting married he goes what an idiot and he kicks
the desk idiot he's like i can't do it he goes oh oh oh, oh, oh. And my crotch is eating you.
It's amazing.
That looks like the most fun Will Ferrell ever had acting.
Oh, man.
I love those bit parts.
Even to bring it back to Pitt.
Pitt, a character actor in a leading man's body.
I mean, Will Ferrell does great character acting.
Leading stuff is good.
I love those roles that are smaller that they just make everything out of.
Yeah, critics said Brad Pitt's best when he's subordinate to another star in a movie.
Like in Ocean's Eleven, he's subordinate to Danny Ocean.
Or in Fight Club, he's Ed Norton's alter ego.
Or in Once Upon a Time in Hollywood, he's like the Aaron guy for Leo's character.
But I choose not to subscribe to the critics' point of view on this.
I would rather subscribe to Pitt
or maybe Farrell's
when making that decision.
Pitt in this example is like,
yeah, you know,
on the call sheet, whatever,
they're not number one
in that scenario,
but like, dude,
he's not even thinking about that.
He's like, dude,
I've got a good role.
Let me go execute this thing
and fucking bring it
and explore myself while doing it.
Done, dude.
That's how you make it great.
But does he like
not being number one on the call sheet? Relieves yeah yeah maybe there's that does it allow him to focus
more on the acting i think so i think yeah there's less less uh external responsibilities you have to
you know adhere to i guess he can eat in scenes like i feel sometimes when you watch chris pratt
you're like he's lost a little bit of like charm almost yeah yeah it doesn't look like he's having as much fun now when he performs.
It looks like he's got the responsibility of $100 million on his shoulders.
Right, yeah.
I feel the weight of the franchise is on him.
Yeah.
And, dude, we love a comeback, too.
Like, we were talking about Pitt.
You've got to fall a little bit.
You've got to kind of, even though he was a success, but he had a low point.
Has Pratt had?
I mean, he went through a divorce.
He went through a divorce.
And he got a lot of heat for doing some thoughts and prayers tweets.
Yeah.
I don't know how acutely he felt it, but if it was me, I would have been like, this sucks.
Totally.
Yeah.
Chad.
Are you guys?
No. But, no. Rip? totally yeah chad are you guys no but no rip uh i thought i thought and then i was like nah everything's fulfilled i love it love it dude just like we were saying earlier i'm
nice nice this has been fun it's been a good one fucking love it sean what up sean what up what's up chad who is your legend of the week
my legend of the week is buster keaton dude i've been crushing buster keaton films this week too
i crushed college and the general uh because i've been trying to like you know expand my knowledge
base and just like you know i was like i gotta learn from like the first guy and just see what he did
and you actually learn a lot when you watch those films like you think like people think oh silent
film's gonna be boring as fuck i've learned a ton watching that you know just like story structure
and his deadpan he's just like he's the fucking man dude and also like i watched the general which
like most of it takes place on a train a moving train which
you know they didn't really have they have cgi they just had like these things they had basic
ass cameras so they were all doing it in real time like a moving train he's running all over
it he's like the first tom cruise dude you know this guy this is love that yeah the original tom cruise um just some facts about
him so he's basically you know the first comedic actor director i guess in film history right
would you say yeah i don't have enough of a cinematic he's up he's up there i think he is
yeah yeah i think he's the first to do a ton of things in film because he was there at the
inception basically yeah so he's known for his guys check out buster keaton
films you know you can just youtube them the general is the most famous one uh buster keaton
is known for his consistent stoic deadpan expression which earned him the nickname the
great stone face um the original stuntman he's he dude he's doing parkour all over the train in the general his
athleticism is insane it's crazy and uh with just consistent gags in between what they look like at
high difficulty too because he's like doing all this stuff he has all these gags laid out throughout
totally um and uh he worked on silent films consistently from 1920 to 1929, and Robert Ebert called him the greatest actor, director,
in the history of the movies.
And Orson Welles called The General the highest achievement in comedy
and possibly the greatest film ever made.
Dude.
Dang.
High praise from a couple of legends.
Yeah, so I just want to give him props.
What up, Buster?
You're a legend.
Dude, and good on you for sitting through two Buster Keaton movies, dude.
Yeah, I was more stoked on it than I thought I'd be.
You are eating your cultural vegetables, and that is not easy, dawg.
Dude, I love that.
Straight up bee sprouts.
Yeah.
With no...
No bacon or balsamic on it.
Right, exactly.
Thank you, because that's the only way to have bee sprouts in my book.
Strider, who is your legend of the week?
Dude, my legend of the week,
it's got to be my GF, dude.
She freaking showed me this dank picture,
and I mentioned it earlier because it's on my dome,
of a snake plant, dude.
And I mentioned Jerry smoking ciggies in the apartment below us.
And a snake plant is great for the air,
and it also
thrives not thrives but oh my my speaker went out can you guys sit here are we still yeah we're
good all right cool dude it friggin dry all right it's back on nice dude that was like straight up
in that scene in saving private ryan when they're storming d-day when he the grenade goes off and
he's looking around and he's like captain captain we gotta move um so i'm just freaking you know straight up captain millering it right now
uh and anyway dude she showed me the snake plant it's great for the air in your apartment it really
raises your stoke having living thing around because you know right now we have our fake tree
which is sick it raises our stoke but i'm gonna be very fired up to get uh get that snake plant
going so we're on the market for that and it's nice to have an activity that we can do together you know kind of when we're chilling watching a
show or something like that or something's on the background we can be on our laptops and be like
oh what do you think of this one oh sick where should it go it's nice to freaking plan dude
just nice to freaking plan stuff the dank stuff with rgf dude being a part of each other's future
so that's really what the snake plant represents for me so fired up for that that's legit legend dude thank you dude dude my legend of the week is a multiple time legend
of the week winner it's my dad fuck yeah he was in town because the high school i went to the high
school that he actually founded um and i'm thankful for that because i don't think i would have been
able to graduate from any other place uh decided to dedicate a building to him. So we went to a mass, which I hadn't been to in a while,
and then we had a lunch afterwards,
and a lot of people got up and spoke about my dad.
And it was just beautiful to hear what people had to say about him.
Like the head dean, Eric Stroop, he came up there.
First he talked about what a difficult student I was to corral,
but all in a positive way which i really appreciated
and then he just um he said that after every meeting my dad would come to his office and ask
two things how are you doing and what do you need and that uh he never asked for anything in return
which i mean i don't know if it's the case but it was nice to hear and then just so many teachers
got up and just said things about my dad that were um basically the i don't know some
of the best stuff people can say about you just that he was reliable and that he cared and that
uh and that they could count on him and uh i really do think that's my dad and uh i'm just uh
yeah jacked on the whole thing i got to give a little speech about him i trashed him a little
bit at first i said he wasn't a good caregiver was like, you ever had a massage from the guy? He's got hands like stones.
But I said he is good at taking care of people.
And yeah, in my life, I contend that to be true.
And you know, my dad has so many dimensions.
Like he's a crazy motherfucker.
But I think he's done a really good job.
And yeah, I'm proud of him for getting the building named after him.
And some of you know he's battling pancreatic cancer, which is a tough thing to deal with but he's handling it really really well
although i do wish he'd eat a little bit healthier but uh you know the dude's the dude that he is
and uh i'm i'm very thankful for it so what's up dad love you that's great dude he's a legend dude
legend chad what is your quote of the week?
My quote of the week comes from this dude, Shad Helmstetter, who's like this self-talk guy.
He's like, you've got to do self-talk, dude.
Make sure your self-talk is on point.
You're eating healthy food.
You've got to eat healthy mind food.
That's his whole thesis.
So, a lot of people ask me that.
They're like, what's the self-talk thing?
Shad Helmstetter, to answer your questions, dudes.
But he said, give life to your dreams, give strength to your visions,
and give light to your path.
Fire, dude.
Love that, dude.
Strider, what is your quote of the week?
Selfishly, I've got to do two. The second second one's very quick and the first one is uh i think goes out to our buddy we mentioned earlier
our our buddy who passed alex halim and i read this uh roomie or rummy i'm probably saying it
wrong and i'm gonna have to paraphrase the quote too because i read it today but it really stood
out and it was like there are no goodbyes um goodbyes are only for people that
love with their eyes because people that love with their heart and soul there are never goodbyes and
i think that stands out at this time you know even though alex is not with us it's not goodbye
because we still love him and so that's that's legit um but then my actual uh quote of the week
that i got the other night i was crushing a dank film called Some Kind of Wonderful, dude.
And there's a character in this movie.
Bro, that's one of my favorite stories.
It's a fucking great John Hughes movie, dude.
It's one of my fucking favorite, bro.
Dude, Chad, dude,
we got to crush a John Hughes movie together.
All three of us got to watch
some John Hughes together.
Freaking dank movies.
You might know Ferris Bueller's this huge one.
He did The Home Alone.
He's a beast, dude.
Writer.
And dude, Some Kind of Wonderful.
Character Duncan, dude. Dank little. And, dude, some kind of wonderful character.
Duncan, dude.
Dank little Bowie song playing in the background.
And, dude, he comes into this.
I don't want to spoil anything.
I won't give you the moment.
But he looks at this guy that you don't like.
And he goes, I don't smell nothing but chicken shit.
And, dude, fucking fire line, dude.
Fire. That is one of the best lines.
And his delivery, dude. in the context around it the
dan carlin context around it is fire dude so fuck yeah dude that's legit yeah
all right what's your quote hold on one second i gotta get a new phone dude dude i have a freaking
iphone 5s look at this thing dude if you're on the video look how great it is dude i don't have I gotta get a new phone, dude. Dude, I have a freaking iPhone 5S.
Look at this thing.
Dude, if you're on the video,
look how great it is, dude.
I don't have gigantic hands,
but imagine if this was like an iPhone X in my hand.
It'd be like an under the giant style hand.
This is a visual thing, so I apologize for that.
But if you're familiar with an iPhone 5S,
it's tiny and I love the size.
And I read this article on iPhones.
It's actually like the top three iPhone. I think the 10X, the most recent one, is the dankest.
Then like the iPhone 8 is apparently very legit.
But baby, don't fucking sleep on the 5S.
This thing has been so true to me for so long.
I got this thing brand new when it came out.
Knock on wood.
Battery's still good.
That's a sick rhyme.
And so just fired up.
5S. Well, I'm just paraphrasing basically to you but Marcus Aurelius has a good quote that's in the
new like stories of old YouTube channel about stoicism and gladiator I strongly
recommend it and I'm gonna butcher it but he basically says every man has two
lives one the life that he leads and then the second is how we all think of them after they're gone
or how we all think of her after she's gone yeah i love that that's beautiful man
yeah all right chat what's your phrase for getting after it um
to get after it i say let's turn these jeans into shorts oh i fucking love that dude little arts and crafts your way oh yeah snip the denim
baby reveal those calves and snip the denim is a good one too let's snip the denim is nice yeah
dude i'm just firing dude hashtag snip the denim
what's yours dude um i got one it's from a um a lifting coach when i was doing volleyball in
college dude coach mams dude and this is a very common one but i'd never heard it was the first
time i heard it and we're putting up some weight dude and i was doing some hand cleans nice and he
goes we're cooking on propane now nice and i like that dude that's fine i like that mine is from the
brad pitt interview that we read.
He was talking about how he partied in the 90s and he goes, I used to just get bonged
into oblivion.
I bonged.
That was great.
Hilarious.
Beast, bro.
I used to get bonged into oblivion.
Bonged into oblivion.
I used to get bonged into oblivion.
He just goes, ha, ha, ha, ha.
Ha, ha, ha, ha.
All right, dudes. Guys, this was fun. This was great, guys. This was amazing. they just goes ha ha ha ha ha ha alright dudes
guys this was fun
this was great guys
this was amazing
always
always excellent
to have Strider
around my dog
dude
back at you dude
freaking back up
both my bros
we will see you soon
fuck yeah
probably in like
a week
yeah
for sure
for sure
or I'll see you tomorrow but the stokers i mean yes um
or will i see you tomorrow sometime yeah sometimes we have zed in the park
yeah oh saturday yeah oh wait we got to talk about that real quick oh right right we want
to save it for another no because it's so much to talk about all right i'll save it for another
yeah teaser teaser yeah but we party with Zedd. We party with Zedd.
Zedd got us into a party.
He's legit.
They're the best.
I'll probably cut that part.
Yeah.
They were great.
We're going to Zedd in the park this Saturday, guys.
Check it out.
Should be legit.
Zedd.
Epic DJ.
Even better, dude.
Guys, stay manscaped and stay stoked.
Keep giving those fire reviews, dudes.
Those help us out a lot to spread the Stoked Nation.
And then, yeah, just stay legit, dudes and ladies.
And you guys want to say anything?
Boom, clap, Stokers.
And as always, we're brought to you by UCI Baseball,
led by their pitching coach, Daniel Babona,
and their head coach as well.
I'm just not as tight of dogs with him,
but I hear he's a really good dude from Danny.
If you're a young dude who can swing and throw,
you definitely need to go to UCI.
They should call it UC Newport Beach because it's right there.
Hell yes.
And of course, Douglas Lubricant, the best in the biz.
Guys, you want to bone, and you want to bone well,
and you want to bone smooth.
So when you bone, bone right with Douglas.
Tons of flavors.
Original, sherbet, raspberry, razzmatazz, and anal.
Anal tastes the best.
Fuck yeah.
Stay stoked, bros.
Later, Sean.
Later, man.
Thanks, guys.
Thanks, dude.
That was fun.
Yeah, that was good.
Thanks for staying late. No, no problem. Thank you. Thanks, dude. That was fun. Yeah, that was good. Thanks for staying late.
No, no problem.
Thank you.
Not a problem at all.
You guys are a treat to listen to.
Thanks, man.
Thank you.
Thank you. If you need advice, these guys are really nice.
You want to know what to do and where to go.
When you need someone to guide you, there's no time to have a girl beside you.
Go in the dream.
Go in the dream. I'm going deep. I'm going deep.
I'm going deep.
I'm going deep.
I'm going deep.