Guys: With Bryan Quinby - Guys: Episode 3 - Karate Guys with Jon Gabrus

Episode Date: February 28, 2023

Hey there, in Episode 3 of guys we take a look at Karate Guys. Me and Jon Gabrus (101 Places to Party Before You Die, Action Boyz, High and Mighty) talk about guys who lie about knowing karate, people we've seen use karate and we also check in with Black Belt Magazine in 2023 and some old ones I got from Twitter user @Boco_t so give them  follow too You can find Jon on twitter as @gabrus Want more Bryan? check out patreon.com/murderxbryan twitter @murderxbryan and also twitch.tv/murderxbryan

Hello, welcome to Guys, a podcast about guys. I am your host, Brian. Quindy, Murder Brian, whatever you know me as know me i'm that guy because i think this is how it's opened all three episodes just be not knowing what name to call my stuff so we've already done sex guys and we had an incredibly fun time doing that and classic rock guys now we're doing guys i don't even know uh i have as my guest this week John gabrus hey Brian murder quimby X or whatever the your name is yeah but branding is not my strong it's just I for years you know you do this for a lit once once you're doing this for a living and you still have that

stupid like kind of attitude of like i'm not gonna you know i'm not gonna be a brand well it's crazy one part that one part i'm not gonna try too hard at this job because i don't like to try hard at work and then it's like but this work is work i'm choosing to do and it's my own it's not like i'm uh working on behalf of someone else and i still won't even try that hard like i'm like it sucks right i do a lot i've done a bunch of shows with jesse farrar and and mike from your kickstarter sucks and they're like really funny dudes and really sweet guys every time i do something with jesse he dms me i was like why don't you fucking post about it so people see it i'll retweet it i'm like you don't have to tell me

i'm embarrassed to do that actually when you say karate guys do you mean like the famous like movie star karate guys or do you mean guys who are just really into karate because they're both equal levels of freaks like it's too it's like i'm both sides on that right like i know that you say your dad was a karate guy like just a literally like way into karate correct is a kind of it's weird um so i i grew up with this guy named mike who was also a karate guy but he would never say he did karate right it would be like shotokan or something oh yeah i mean technically my father was a taekwondo guy but for the sake of this

conversation to not infuriate martial arts experts and with the venn diagram of martial arts experts and podcast listeners um i don't want to ruin it when we say karate we mean martial arts yeah whether it's wing win chung kung fu or uh taekwondo or kenpo or shotokan or tiger shulman or what's the Israeli one? Krav Maga. No matter what it is, you know what we mean. Quimby and I are a certain age. In the 80s in America, everything was karate and arguably Asian phobic or whatever.

But we grew up in a world where karate was paramount. It was nearly magic. It was in movies. it was in reality. And then we were sold a false bill of rights by karate grifters, which are too real of a thing. Especially in the suburbs. I'm from Long Island, the suburbs. It's like a little bit of money and all of a sudden everyone's kid is doing karate. And in LA you see that the most in like the valley in burbank it's like of course that's where you know daniel larusso trained but every single fucking like block has

a karate studio on it in the valley it's it's like the land that time forgot it's so weird to me because when i was growing up and and i i the guy mike i knew that was like a karate dude like he was like borderline in a way kind of magical to me because it was like he could fuck me up and you know what he would do and i'm telling you he did this way too late in life because i was 19 we were both 19 years old and we worked at kroger and he would come up behind you and put his hands like a certain way and be like i could have killed you right there you know that's one move i could do to kill you uh quick aside question how tall is this guy mike like just a a touch taller than me oh right not a small person because i knew a couple of small guys who

are constantly way later in life like 16 17 like bending your pinky back until you go like ah ah and they're like just give up and you're like okay man we're like standing outside of i'm going to get my car like i'm too old for you to vinnie to grab my fucking pinky and bend it back but those guys were always like little guys that i think needed to assert some stuff karate shit like breaks people like i'm for a ton i'm sure for a majority of people it instills discipline fitness some flexibility stuff that's all good for you but there's a not zero portion of people who go mad with karate power you know what phrase is insane but yeah i mean it there are people who go mad with karate power it's weird right because like on the outside looking in we know about like four things about karate right we

know there's belts and we know that the highest belt is a black belt but then there are degrees to black belt and for a guy like me especially growing up in the 80s and early 90s a black belt just meant you could fuck anybody up in the whole world it didn't mean what it actually means which is you got a nice belt for exercising like you committed to something for several years which in itself is a big victory but it does not not something you should proudly like i was a black belt at like 14 or 15. like come on what could i anybody up around me no could i you know break a board can i do a k? Could I know the names of a few moves? Yeah.

Could I spar someone my age and not get annihilated? Barely. My dad was a black belt. Me and my brother were both black belts. And it was just, there's a level of like, and I take this from someone who's done improv classes. There's a little bit of a level of like, get through the program. You can almost like, with time and money buy your black belt more or less or yeah there's like a little bit of that energy out there of course that's what i had heard from a few people that

like most karate is or the belt system is a way to sell belts more than it is at some schools it's like everybody gets now look i'm not some everybody gets mad because everybody gets a trophy i don't want to be that way but everybody gets belts like you don't i don't know there's a test right yeah and you take a yellow bow test a green bell test a blue bell test whatever whatever it may be but Brian you're stumbling on something here because it is but there is something about the mechanics of proving yourself and and getting a step up that it works like video games you just want to level up you want to get the you want to get the plus two sword instead of the plus one sword like that shit and karate marketing or you know bringing americanizing karate martial arts instruction activated that they were like people are going

to want to know their progress people are going to want to beat level one of mario and hear the music and jump on the flag and fireworks and then we can go to this underwater level uh it's perfect it is such a perfect uh i don't want to say scam but for the people that are scamming i don't think you could ever do anything better because parents of young kids really just want to get rid of them for an hour like i you know you drop them off they're doing fucking karate and you can i don't know go smoke cigarettes or something like oh it's it's like a human dog park in that way too for like parents like take this kid for an hour you know like try to instill some discipline in them at minimum tire them out and like i'll come take them back

and like what that was us like every sunday morning we had uh taekwondo and then my mom would pick us up we would go get uh bagels and then go to church and like a gi with a starter jacket over it like standing it's funny to think about too because it's like yeah that you get you get a gi and that is super cool but then when ufc came out uh it became like uncool now to wear a gi you have to be like a guy that that wears like tight shorts or whatever because yeah you have to be in like street clothes yeah and mma sort of is what fucked up the the old time karate thing because i i grew up with this fucking guy too who not mike i'm gonna tell you a little bit more about mike's mike claims

that he was he tried out for the green ranger and also sometimes was the green power ring when he's in the costume and for and you grew up uh where was this groveport ohio yes where they shot famously shot power rangers yeah and it's just like as we know as adults those actors that we saw in the power rangers were not the people in the suits that was the converted like that was already shot from a different show they added the high school elements to like the imported show fucking mike told it good mike was the shit dude he but but like there was also a this my friend's girl you know like when you have a friend and they got a sister an older sister and you hang out at their house

you just think this the older sister is like the coolest person in the world and god help you if she has some of her friends over and there's like six random extra boobs in the house you're supposed to be hanging out with your friend and you're just like uh can we go back upstairs for a second like i don't want to be in the basement they're all upstairs they're playing in the living room let's hang out in the living room yeah why are you trying to get away from the girls let's go hang out with the girl they're four years older than you yeah they have no desire to engage with a 13 year old and you're like oh hi Sarah it's me Gabriel she started dating a guy that I've had this happen a bunch in my life i'll tell you a quick story

because this it wraps that way my my sister back when uh uh god i would have been 94 or 95 was dating a guy who said he was the voice of buster bunny on tiny tune adventure and he had money like he had a neo geo and like you could tell he had some money quimby we are you're one of those people that i never really knew in life and then when we meet it turns out we had like such parallel lives the idea of neo geo meaning money is like the realist fucking shit in the world and it's so specific to a time and to a type of guy and we are those guys dude my parents felt so bad that we sold our house and didn't have a new house to move into we had to move into our grandpa's house and our grandpa like hated us like not hated us but he was like a widow 75 year old who now had fucking three feral boys living there and he rented us neo geo for

the summer from video games and more and we were like this is the richest i've ever felt was playing fucking wind jammers in my grandfather's and i told that story as i got older a lot of like dude we had neo geo for one summer and as i got older people were like the look on their face i'd realize how sad that sounds it's like the one summer when I lived at my grandpa's house we had well I I he had the neo geo he brought it over and he told us for some fucking reason uh that he uh he's the voice of buster bunny I got the neo geo everything's going cool with him or whatever and then he goes like this he goes I'm like well why don't you do the buster bunny voice for me like could you do the buster bunny voice and he was

like i'm not i'm contractually not allowed to do it unless i'm in the studio damn he had the fucking defenses already set smart impenetrable you don't know how contracts work or how the entertainment business works but like i thought it was the coolest shit on the planet and then like a minute the fucking second i walked out of my house and told my friend they're like he's fucking lying dude dude that's the realest shit the barometer of your other friends where you're like actually my friend from religion is the jump rope champion and they're like what are you like you the second you have to repeat the specifics you realize how bad of a lie how badly you were duped it's like no his dad is jackie chan but he is white and it's like come on everyone's like what and you're like

oh right yeah no with one inkling of someone going are you sure i've realized how fucking like the bullshit i've believed buster yeah and those lies are so so i got what caught one time telling two girls from my school that i got in a fight this weekend and like the story i told was from the movie the boy who could fly and they were like isn't this the premise of the boy who could fly and i was like uh oh yeah right well you know it's pretty similar maybe that's where he got the idea from the guy like so humbling yeah that is that is something but this guy lied about buster bunny stuff which i think is the greatest lie of all time the contract thing

the contract thing was so genius my sister really fucking believed him and there's nothing you could say to him because like i said he's got a 600 game system back when they were like 120 dollars you know uh probably spent every penny he had on that trying to live that like fake life like obviously i'm a famous vo artist i have a neo geo i'm playing metal slug 2 over here i'm gonna live forever he was great but so this one that my friend's sister amy was dating a guy who said he was a kickboxing champion and that like there's nobody on the street that could beat him up now i do believe in kickboxing champ like that they would whip somebody's ass and i always believed this guy was just an ass kicker never saw him fight years later ninth grade hanging out with my boy sean there is a kid named angel at the school and

you know we made fun of his name of course yeah but he'll kill him what do you want to do and uh he's big he's like ripped you know and he knows karate and nobody wants to with him nobody and i have this friend named sean who is i don't know he's just a shit kicker really you know he just but he fought they get into an argument angel fucking it's like let's fight after school they get ready to fight angel does a round house kick to sean and sean just absorbs it and punches his life out one second and i looked at it and i was like maybe maybe karate is doesn't work that's so awesome i saw the kick he did around he went on it looked so perfect dude but it hit him right across his

chest and anybody can take a kick i mean by some most people yeah half-assed roundhouse to the chest yeah you can be i think we could survive that yeah i've just never seen somebody just take a blow not even not even for a second be like that really hurt and then the dude just punches the guy immediately and the dude just goes down one punch he goes down and so now like it always felt like these karate guys like kind of coasted on the fact that karate coasted on the fact that karate was this exotic thing back then because mike never got into it the mike dude that i knew he never got into one fight in school and he was the type of dude that people would pick on but everybody was like oh yeah you don't mess with mike he knows karate and just he never nobody ever tested him one fucking time.

I feel like credible. Yeah, that's I feel like karate and martial arts has had this like bell curve of like when it came out, it was totally cool and mysterious and badass. And maybe I happen to be the ages that play with this as well but i remember being like two years after getting my black belt never mentioning the fact that i did karate like you know like i remember it being like the mid to late 90s and just being like shut the fuck up man do not like you you could still get worked by an older guy a bigger dude can still kick your fucking ass you're not you're soft no you don't want anyone to challenge that you know it's kind of dorky now in hindsight and you're like and then with the proliferation of ufc and mma it only looks cornier and cornier but now coming around to it again i'm in my 40s obviously and i'm nostalgic for that era and you know all my

movie heroes were all martial artists now i'm taking like adult martial arts in a fucking park here in la and it's got the exact blend of people you think it does the you it's got some guys who are i swear to god i'm the green ranger it's got some guys that are like uh i'm an absolute psycho just looking to put and then i it's got some people who are like i use this to go tell other people i take martial arts and try to scare them it's so real to meet adult like to choose that subculture and and walk towards it and just see the other people that are choosing it a couple of the guys are like would be amazing kickboxers boxers whatever they whatever martial art they fell into they're just like stud athletes who are like i want to compete and i want to win and then there are guys like me who are like you

know bruce lee always believed like some corny ass fucking i had like white guy who's like you know the belief system and it's just like i'm embarrassed by it but i'm owning it and when i was a kid i was not embarrassed at all and owning it and then the middle I was embarrassed and avoiding it but like it's such a true bell curve of who gives a fuck but I mean if you're doing it for exercise that's that's totally like it's it's exercise it is the guys who want to fight yes that you're like it's not gonna work dude like like once you're once you're 19 or i'll give you 25 you should be almost never you should never be fighting once you turn 20 something years old you should just never get in a fight you should be avoiding them at all costs there's no point no one i know this is a hack thing to say but if you fight as a grown-up there are zero winners like beating somebody up

is not cool anymore getting beat up sucks uh having a stalemate getting broken up like a fight getting broken up all that shit sucks don't do it anymore but yeah i i people who have never been punched in the face are the ones that are like i want to fucking go out there and fight and you're like man i've been punched sometimes and it's it actually doesn't feel very good it really fucking rattles you i've been punched in the face in like 15 years and i ain't trying to get a refresher on that like i do not i haven't i think it would have had to been when i was 19 may have been the last time I got it. Well, no. Yeah, 19. Because I got fired at a job. And I drove back up to the Kroger and fucking stood in the middle of it and said, I was calling off sick because I wanted to go to Lollapalooza.

And I had been really drunk the night before so i was already hung over and i was like you know what i sound sick i'll just call off and i'll go to lollapalooza and he told me i couldn't call off or i'd be fired so i got in the car and drove up there and said come the out now ken you're not so tough now that you're not my boss yeah i i'm in it like i it just i i i don't my i'm very weird about like not weird about it but like pain is something that i complain about but it doesn't like none of that stuff really bothers you know like I'm scared to death of a rollercoaster but somebody punching me or something like that I'm like what happened before so I did some googling around uh black belt magazine which i'm sure you've my dad was a

subscriber i would read that he would not let us look at it until he had finished it cover to cover and so then it would get moved into my into our bathroom the young the kids bathroom me and my two brothers who are also in the and then i would just look through that and i've talked about this before but i'm sure you remember boys life magazine had those awesome ads in the back for like hovercrafts and like the only magazine that had those back page ads beat i mean i'm assuming there's like pornographic ones but black belt magazine the shit they were selling in the back of the magazine was fucking awesome it was like ninja claws for climbing trees grappling hooks little like tabby shoes that split your toes and stuff all this shit i wanted so bad but i fucking loved black belt

magazine yeah well a friend of mine online uh boko underscore t got a shit ton of uh black belt magazine from the past and he's scanning them and posting scans of some of the funnier stuff oh that's awesome he sent me a few and the ones that i really responded to were the letters to the editor one thing i want to say first is one of the myths when i looked for karate myths the one that made me laugh is you have to register your hands with the police department oh my god that was such a real thing and people oh uh i think it's called out in the uh the once my time in hollywood brad pitt says some to bruce lee like to the fake bruce lee he's like yeah everyone has to do yeah of course they're deadly like some like that and it's like yeah i remember hearing that so much that's a

mitt oh that's a classic yeah it's funny too because it's like well i remember when i was a kid i i actually saw through that one when i was a kid because i said wouldn't like mike tyson have to do that too though yeah like wouldn't a guy that's like a boxer that punches really hard have to register because his hands are also lethal weapons but i think in their mind but they're in my mind when i was a real little kid it was because they could like pull your throat out yeah something in my mind it was because like karate was a step above boxing it had like a little bit of a mysticism to it and like who knew what you could get hit with a fucking haiduken at the bar or whatever uh well the dim mock that's something i i did a lot of looking into. Oh, dude, I'm obsessed with Count Dante.

So don't even get me started on. You want to talk karate guys. Count Dante is like the OG karate guy. He is like loosely who like Frank Dukes from Bloodsport is based on because this dude swore he fought in Iron Fist tournaments in like in overseas and this guy has such a great fucking story and he and his books were always in the back of these black belt magazines count dante would later become like a hairstylist in chicago slash uh martial arts instructor and then would eventually get in some hot water for him and some students planting improvised explosive devices at another dojo during what that was deemed the dojo wars and like i don't

know like it's like one of those blurrings of legends and reality that i have no idea what's true and what's not but count dante is like he has like a tony stark goatee and like a perm he's a very very and dim mac which brian mentioned is the death touch the shot that could allegedly kill you uh jean-claude van damme as frank dukes demonstrates that in blood sport when he hits the brick and breaks the one below it and that's when the guy's like the democ hoops did that on daytime tv which used to be a lot weirder when we were kids yes dude you would see like i'm goth and i drink my own piss and be like that just on at one in the afternoon you're like she's kind of hot i'll watch this whole thing oh god yeah it was always so weird too when you had they had the famous people on the shows and

it's like you would you would watch like a daytime tv show and they would have like a fucking celebrity like like not like tom cruise and then the next segment would be like frank dukes breaking a board and then the next segment would be like somebody cooking a meatloaf true four quadrant programming but i'm like a 12 year old boy watching all of it like oh yeah this is all important to me dom de louise like you know like just like learning who old celebrities are to other people and shit oh my god dude i was just telling my wife this the other day but when i was a before i was even a teenager maybe 12 or 13 like very young like my favorite movie was arthur and i don't think i like quite understood what was going

on or anything and i don't know why it was like my favorite movie but i was obsessed with arthur and when arthur ii on the rocks came out i begged my parents with arthur and when arthur 2 on the rocks came out i fucking begged my parents to take me to see arthur 2 that's so funny that our generation is the generation where like things that like our parents didn't like we didn't have programming made for us per se like besides like true kid shit like cartoons transformers and gi joes and stuff but there wasn't stuff that was made for just us. So our parents would squeeze, like, hey, this is what's on TV right now. I'm like a little kid watching Jeopardy every night.

And I'm like, I don't give a shit about any of this, but now this is all I'm able to get. So as a little TV addict, I was just so happy. Sorry, jump back to daytime TV. Frank D frank dukes breaking bricks put up your dukes break some bricks but i i was going to read you a letter a few letters out of black belt magazine and uh the first one is and this is such an online thing this is like this is this happens to this day now your writer is a student he calls himself your writer by the way i don't i don't know what that weird language situation is i don't like it your writer is a student of judo and also has a full working knowledge of the motion picture production

i am interested in producing a motion picture feature film for theater release the theme of which will involve judo along with christian emphasis wow now this is the weird part this is that's not the weird part i just don't even know like because he says the reason for this letter is to ask if you would publish this letter and hope that it will bring me in contact with someone of large means, such as a philanthropist who will sponsor the film. Locals in my city would make some investments. $100,000 would be needed from the sponsor in the movie company. This is not a stock offering and could not be under federal laws and regulations.

this is not a stock offering and could not be under federal laws and regulation however if there were to be a philanthropist who would consider this loan i'll be glad to supply full details there's a chance of very good profit from this picture but of course the motion picture industry does involve a great deal of speculation and that's from c kennan robertson from spartanburg south carolina he wants to make a movie this is a kickstarter right here except back then you could never fucking you wouldn't be able to envision crowdsourcing right so it's just like i need to find a fucking philanthropist like and it's like you're not even a philanthropist gives the fucking charity. You're not even, you're making a Christian judo movie. That's so crazy.

That's so fucking funny. Cause like it's you're right. It's so modern to be like, I have this idea and I believe, despite I can see how the mechanics kind of work around me. And this is like not the path at all but i believe that i should be able to make this movie and it will be super successful it's like brother do you know how many movies are being trying to be made do you know how many judo movies like like just the idea and we're because we're all such protagonists and and i think the online era lets us see how much

ever let us see each other and see how much people believe themselves to be the protagonist so it hits in this extra layer this extra thing that we couldn't previously see before now it's so just naked and like this is so like i think i solved it judo with christianity and no no i'm a he says i have judo knowledge and a working knowledge of the entertainment industry. I'm in. Here's 100 grand. But that's all I needed to hear. Like, that's the presumption. That's what it is.

The presumptuousness, the presumption some people have of like the shit I get in my DMs. It's like my friends having a birthday in uh a suburb outside of detroit and they are a huge fan we are unable to pay for your flights or hotels but we would love it if you could make it and come by and we uh we're all big fans and we love weed and beer or whatever it's like okay i'm 41 years old i don't even want to go to parties i'm invited to. I'll tell you what, I host a new metal podcast. And if you saw the messages we get from people that are like, nobody knows about Slipknot more than I do. It's like, what?

I mean, we're not even like a fact show. We just reviewed the album. But we recently, this is such a the album but we recently we are this is such a aside but we recently got this this guy like messaged us in on patreon and um he basically was like oh i have to find it because it is wild uh basically he he says, yep, okay. I haven't heard one second of your podcast, but I signed up for your Patreon because I feel like I need to be involved

in a Nu Metal apologist discussion. Let me be frank. Nu Metal was the most artistically bankrupt, idiotic, cynical, and probably toxic genre in music history. It really sucks, but I would like to offer my assistance and expertise on an episode I haven't listened I think it sucks but I'd love to that is people in a nutshell like I I refuse to learn anything about politics I don't want to

but if I was in congress i'd fix it look hey have me on your podcast i've never actually tried to do comedy or even like learned as to anything about you but i think you need someone like me on your podcast because i'll bring i have people in my family that have that energy like that are like my father-in-law yeah most of my family is like i'm actually the funniest one in the previous podcast I was doing, it was like a laugh leftist thing. And, and my stepdad or my father-in-law was like, you should bring me on so I can argue with you. And I'm like, I don't want to do that. Like, I don't want to make a fucking podcast where we just argue with each and i'm like i don't want to do that like i don't want to make a fucking podcast

where we just argue with each other here's one uh a letter to black belt i am one of the subscribers to your magazine and find the editorial section in some instances very helpful there is a question or saying that comes up once in a while that i have not been able to find the answer to at least some of the inquiries that i have mailed out have remained undanswered this guy expects this guy expected a letter back like like he keeps sending letters to black belt magazine and nobody is responding to and he's like what the fuck man i'm asking you guys questions you don't answer but he goes off does one that become proficient in judo and karate have to register with police departments? I think this is an undue restraint upon one's freedoms unless, of course, he has a police record

and the town, city, or what have you requires a registration under the police powers of the particular body involved. A prompt answer for the above inquiry would be greatly appreciated frank fullerton judo instructor texas western college and karate instructor fort bliss texas in texas you don't even you can carry a gun around on the streets without like a permit i don't think you need to register judo hip tosses as well i love this guy though because this guy is just like you know what man uh i don't know if i'm gonna learn judo if i have to register with the government yeah he's like a weird anarchist like he's like i don't involve i don't believe in like uh registering that's his bacon i was gonna

do judo but i can't deal with all the red, the red tape in getting my hands permitted as lethal weapons. I can't afford the registration fee for the lethal weapon. I'm getting my fingers registered as a sex toy. Here's one. And I had an old girlfriend that claimed that she was a Akito expert. That's the Seagal martial martial art that's the one that uses your opponent's momentum and force and gravity to your own advantage uh i love aikido she wouldn't tell me what it was she would never show me one second of it i don't know why she told me it we were 16. i wasn't like a karate guy at all i I was more like, I guess the best way you could describe,

like they called us hoods in high school. The thugs are just an idiot. You know what I mean? Just a dumb fucking idiot that was doing crime all the time. And like, she was like, yeah, we were called dirt bags.

That's true. And she goes like this. Yeah. Yeah. I can't really go out and get in trouble because i know aikido okay cool i'm gonna tell somebody else's story real quick a guy co-host action boys with me ryan stanger he told this story he was on a ski trip with some high school buddies and they got in a fight with some kids from another school and they were like our friend danny knows karate and he's gonna come back here with us and whoop your asses and they

were like yeah go ahead bring danny over same we all know of like you've seen karate guys get knocked out a bunch like it's like it happens the dorks in my high school who did karate who fought with like actual like guys who developed early mental physically were able to dominate so you're like all right yeah bring this karate and he said that this guy came down from the mountains like all right this is danny all right and then that guy proceeded to beat the at all three of them and my buddy played college football and was like uh uh tested with the pros like he's not he was like an absolute stud athlete and his two buddies are also studs and this kid from another school like punched him in the stomach kicked him in the

head like worked them all over and they like they literally were talking about it like i can't believe it really happened like a guy yeah he showed up like a movie kicked the shit out of three bullies like we were bullies and we got our asses kicked I love when that happens I got beat up though the first time I ever got beat up I was just just bullying this kid just being mean uh and for some reason this was the line I was like you got Bobo shoes and he just clocked me and then jumped on top of me and stuff because I had pictured this is the problem with guys like me and you that watched action movies growing up when we were kids like in my mind i see how i could win

the fight and then every time i got into a fight after that none of the mechanics work right no it's also in you never the second you get hit in the face like they like they always say like your plan goes awry the second you hit in the face or whatever. And they are right. The second you hit the face, your eyes tear up and you feel like a child, like no matter what you imagine, the second your eyes are tearing up, you're like, oh, or you get the wind knocked out of you. It's like so instantly infantilizing or humbling that you're just like, oh, and you're like, I don't want to fight anymore. I've never even used karate in a fight. I've been in like a couple of fights in my life. And the one fight that I actually even did well in was because I dropped my swimming bag because it was before swim practice. And the kid who wanted to fight me looked down at it.

And when he looked down at it, I just punched him as hard as I could at the face we hadn't he was like do you want to fight or not and i just put my bag down and when he i realized he wasn't looking i just swung and hit him right in the face and started like punching i just jumped on him and i was like everyone's like gabrus won that fight and i was like i cheap shotted like a dork like a guy only way to win though that is in in 99 of fights because when I was growing up uh there was this belief that if you throw the first punch you're the one that gets in trouble and then the person who didn't throw the first punch they just send you home if the police come or anything like that they're like you you didn't throw the first punch you're fine doesn't matter how bad you beat him up because he threw the first punch so guys would stand and like push each other

and hope that yes beg for the shot dude I remember a guy on his knees with his hands behind his back going just hit me right in the face right now like like people just wanted the permission to like be like it was self-defense like it's what scummy i'm having flashbacks to like some of the scummiest i've ever done well the thing is i i learned because i had a my buddy sean who fought angel i talked about earlier he never lost a fight and it was because like if you pushed him and said throw the first punch he'd be like okay and he would throw the first punch and that is how you win it is especially with untrained fighters the best thing you can do is just bring the fight like start the fight it's like guaranteed of fucking

and that's like goes against the karate teachings right like and you have to like teach yourself like you because in your mind like in my mind if i got into a fight i have like a combination of punches that like if i'm standing right like i'm doing it right now like that thing where you look like you're about to fight and it's like uh that never works and i don't know what it actually does and my punches like i hit the guy and your wrist bends yeah you hit like you your wrist hits like this like you go to do a hook and like your wrist hits like dude the one two of the worst injuries i've ever gotten in a fight one one time i did get knocked out from a blindside punch another time i hurt my own hand punching someone because i hit

them in like in the shoulder didn't hurt them at all and i like jammed four of my fingers it was like i was like if that's the karate lesson though is they do teach you how to punch or hit or chop yeah well and honestly that brings you up above like 33 percent of people in your age and weight, whatever dynamic. If you can throw a punch without breaking your own wrist, like if you've punched a heavy bag before or a mitts or another person or a, you know, a Makiwara board, which I still have in my parents' basement. My dad had one of those hand toughening boards that he put on like the pole that is like a house support in the basement. So the house would shake as he would punch it. There's like both staffs.

I should get some pictures of my parents' basement. There's like a bow staff, a wooden training sword, all my dad's belts like on a display with like a framed, like this certifies John Gabrus. My father is also John, uh, certifies John Gabrus as a second dan black belt in uh tung su do taekwondo or whatever it was so fucking crazy my dad was such a dork

and like like he was a nerd guy like i would have been mean to him if he had gone to school with me he's like a computer programmer in the the 80s and everything and i remember thinking i wish my dad was badass like i'd go over to my friend's house and their dads would be like tough guys and you know screaming and drinking beer which my dad didn't do any of that so it was really great for me actually it was probably way worse for them i'll tell you that as someone who had a real tough guy dad a high school dropout who like worked customizing cars and as a boat valet like just a fucking real true i thought i was a dirtbag my father was like a true true dirtbag and that life was not fun no i'll take a computer

program and dad who's around and sober over what I was dealing with any day it's kind of funny though for me just to imagine like an adult with three children doing a hand toughening board like in the basement toughening his hands up so he can do better karate there was a period in my dad's life where he got so obsessed with martial arts and like Steven Seagal that he like grew out his hair into a ponytail and like whispered, started like whispering everything he said, sort of like, you know, like sort of became soft spoken. Like, well, you know, you got to like, he just kind of adopted this and we would be like, what the fuck? And he had a lot of these crazy ass like pseudo martial arts beliefs like when we went to a restaurant he would want to be able to see the

door from his seat in case anything went down like and i'm like that what the everything was like never leave your back exposed johnny johnny would you see when you're at the beach like this someone could come up behind you and you know sucker punch you everything was like some this is you got to make sure rubber band on your wallet always be walking ready for action like everything was always like people are ready to kill you any chance you get i and it's like he he may have been right i don't know i maybe the times kind of changed around him a little i think with like litigation and social media like fighting began but my dad lived this like believed himself to be like kai chain kang or whatever legend continues the thing was back then though is that like all of your information comes from

like the local news and the news and the newspapers. And if all of the information that comes in from outside of the house is either like gossip about, you know, your mom's friends or whatever, and then news of crime, like just fucking constant crime. I can see sometimes people like sometimes people can't believe how, I mean, I see it now. I live in downtown Columbus and my in-laws live an hour away and they won't come to my house they're afraid to come to downtown columbus ohio not it's not even like a bad neighborhood and nothing goes on here i walk here all day all

over town and they don't want to come down my father-in-law was supposed he's a veteran first of all and he was gonna his somebody fucking my brother-in-law talked him into fucking going to dc for some one of those things where people ride their motorcycles for the veterans or whatever no i don't know how that plays out or what yeah yeah he he would he was like fucking complaining because he couldn't take his gun there and so like if you if every if all of your inputs are telling you that there is nothing but crime then you're gonna be like a person it's like crime's gonna fucking happen when i was in eighth grade we went to dc and they prepped us through a whole day about how to deal with if somebody did crime

or if somebody pickpocket you and like that it's crazy it's dude it's so funny you say this this is actually a topic we've been talking about in my house. Like my in-laws are like, the city is crazy now. You know what I mean? And it's like, I lived in New York City for 10 years and you never thought that. Now you hear, like, where are you getting this info from? You don't know anyone that lives in the city right now, yet you're saying the city is crazy right now. My mom was just visiting me in LA, took her out to Palm Springs for her birthday weekend.

We're driving back from Palm Springs. She's so uninformed about it. Every time I'm like, where do you want to go when you come out? Is there anything you want to see? Because she's just going to be kind of mad that we didn't take her to some place we didn't know she wanted to go or whatever. She sets us up for failure, sets herself up to be able to complain. And quick aside, it's always like, well, I always want to go to San Diego. I'm like, all right, well, that's like me coming home to Long Island saying i want to go to albany it's not like it's not exactly as

easy as you think it is we have to kind of set that up we can't go to san diego for lunch but let's talk i can get you and she knows nothing about any and then we're driving she's like where is this so-called tent city and i'm like how are you living on long island and so informed on tent city and la and then my aunt asked me about tent city it's like well i don't know if i want to be walking past tent city and i'm like i'm so are you guys talking about like skid row we have multiple tent cities in la i'm not bragging at this point but it's like like it's part of city life and what are you so afraid of i'm not afraid of it and it's in my say i all i feel is empathy sympathy and i'm sad for the situation and you guys are afraid of it in your i live in an apartment on the street i have i have unhoused guys who

ask me for throw pillows and stuff like i feel like i i'm giving away off my porch out of like uh kindness and fear like uh yeah hey i just don't my house up here's some stuff you know like yeah like we're the cool guys on the block and my family is like i don't know california is like under attack and I'm like what the that puts you and we see that sort of like we see the sort of global ramifications of that and you said something earlier Brian I'm going to try to tie this all together somehow you said like guys like us who grew up watching action movies I I'm revisiting them now with my podcast action boys for a few years now really going in on them they're so

fascist they're so pro-fascist i i i can't believe movies made a 12 year old gabrus hate internal affairs like how can i have an opinion on internal affairs in the police department but i'm like they won't let the cops do their job and now i'm like 40 and like understanding movies and i've moved past and i i again i think we agree on a lot of this kind of stuff and then i just see people who are brain poisoned from those movies like and not in a way that they're aware of where they are like well in that situation i would know what to do if i had my gun on my hip in dc i would be safe i wouldn't hurt myself for someone i love by accident never i would be a fucking hero i know

exactly what to do if i get in a fistfight i know not to go to tent city because that's where all the gang of capoeira thugs are hanging out or whatever is in their mind like a bunch of jamaicans with fucking machetes or uh you know insert nationality with insert weapon here that all these movies we watch grown up people really believe that shit i know and cops are heroes to all these people too and like i i have cops in my family and friends and it's like i don't even think they're like they're villains a lot of times they're some of my worst friends growing up are the ones who are cops now and i thought they were heroes too i thought the only thing that could i thought the only thing better than a cop was like a guy an extrajudicial killer who was like you know like

it's funny that you bring that that you talk about because i always felt like like a lot of how people think like the cia works and is like from watching 24 yeah and i think 24 had a fucking i think it had a real life implications when they were selling the iraq war that that like there was a genuine belief that a guy could have all that stuff happen over 24 hours and like barely avert like any crisis and it's like i think i think there are a lot of people who who believe that like that's how things work yeah and meanwhile the people we're sending are like 18 year olds with like no other direction left and like like you know like a lot of people choosing to go and more power to them but a lot of people who are like this is the only salvation for me is this and i'm go and we

think it's like a keifer sutherland is over in like hell no dude it's kids it's children we're sending children in these situations dude I think you're 100 right so many of these shows and movies and again I'm gonna try to get it back on topic here alongside I think martial arts in the 80s and 90s to but when mma kind of ate martial arts lunch mixed martial arts kind of ate uh everybody's taekwondo kickboxing karate all that eight ninjas oh ninjutsu juju oh god my i love ninjas love ninjas anyone who's a real ninja in real life is insane and i i can't i can't help but be i cannot help but be pumped to meet someone who's like i actually study the ninja arts like it's amazing but mma is kind of like they bastardize martial arts to make a better

uh fighting system that works for this specific type of competition and is good for self-defense because it has grappling and combat and and hand to hand in it but it's attracted like not the same vibe as the old like uh Eastern uh martial arts attracted people where it was like I'm peaceful I'm learning stuff I'm learning to now it's like everyone who does if I went to if you went to a party where it was a hundred people who took Wing Chun Kung Fu I'd be like that could be kind of weird and interesting I would not go to a party that was a hundred people who trained at an MMA gym it would be like totally right it would be like going to a strip club without strippers it would be like the like nightmare don't speak like that and that whole shift is like a weird shift

of the Overton window of martial arts where it's like, now it's like, it used to be for good guys. Now it feels like it's for bullies. It's for tribal tattoos. It's like for, it's for cops. It's like, right. One of the funny, like, this is something,

here's another letter to Black Belt magazine that'll put you right back to your time growing up with what you thought about karate. I just purchased a copy of your magazine and I enjoyed it very much. I have heard much about Aikido and I was wondering if you knew of any competent schools of instruction in the New York area. competent schools of instruction in the New York area. One of the stories that I have heard regarding this art of defense is that there is an old master who in using Aikido can dodge bullets. This is rather incredible. And I was wondering if there was any validity to that. Now that's someone has to write.

Well, you know what? I, I, it doesn't sound realistic realistic but it could be true i should write black belt magazine find out if it's real like that person's partner i'm assuming it's a man that person's wife is going like honey you cannot dodge bullets with the key you know he's like i'm waiting for a letter back from black belt magazine to confirm if i could it's like you're gonna get killed on the streets you cannot touch bullets it feels like if you could somehow buy the rights to black belt magazine and make a movie just based on the people that sent letters like if you went through and picked all the best letters from the letters to the editor and just made a movie based on that it's like it's almost

a true story but it's actually a bunch of lies and yeah you make like an anthology series that takes place in like 89 and we just follow these random fucking karate guys across the united states all like with black belt magazine being the central figure could you that sounds like a child wrote that letter and could you imagine like that's like there are grown men who were wondering that at the time that's how big karate got it was a lot of people were doing it a lot of people were selling it to kids for money like you know kid how much can can an eight-year-old really be a black belt in fucking martial arts like can i can a 10 year old be a master of self-defense i doubt it i doubt i doubt it but if you can get the parents to pay for the belts fuck it but the amount of adults who are taking

martial arts is fucking crazy too well that is the next thing i wanted to do uh this is gonna be the last thing we're gonna do but this is also from black belt magazine which is something i'm gonna uh uh i'm gonna subscribe to black belt magazine hell yeah i need to get my hands on that i mean have you walked by the magazine rack at a at a store over in the past like years? I have not. It's insane. It's like, this is a whole magazine about 9mm. Right. They've gotten so niche that that's the only... Dude, last year for Kix,

I thought I was ordering a few Soldier of Fortune magazines off of an eBay thing, and i kept getting out bids so i bid on like three and i was like all right and i woke up the next morning having won all of them and not realized that they were like 30 magazine boxes so i got like 90 soldier of fortune magazines and i gave them away to a bunch of action boys listeners but they were fucking crazy they were like on the cover was like a guy in snow camo with an uzi and it's like things are heating up in the balkans it's like wait what this is like the articles were bananas it's about like the merits of different submachine guns but also about elite forces and then also

about minor conflicts around the world and you just know there were people who were like i gotta get to belarus and get involved like it's fucking crazy oh yeah somebody that reads that i mean there's a lot of people that read that magazine that are never gonna do anything but there is like a one percent of the people that read that magazine that are like i gotta get on a fucking plane right now and and go to columbia and take down pablo escobar i read this amazing article in the New Yorker about um the foreign uh troops that are in Ukraine like uh people who went to the Ukraine to help defend them from the Russians and the article it's like a bunch of American ex-operators from Afghanistan

who are like we're I'm doing the opposite of what I did in Afghanistan. Instead of rooting out insurgents, I am an insurgent. It feels insane. A lot of cool shit like that. But one of the highlights of the article is a bunch of people showed up originally when the call went out and it was a lot of ex-cops and fucking weird right-wing guys and shit. And the people being interviewed for the article are talking about it.'s like apparently the training base was like attacked by like uh artillery fire in like the first week and like 80 of the people dropped out like all the guys all these guys are like oh i'm getting the fuck out of here like the only people who stayed were people with actual like in combat experience like everyone else was like oh fuck i've been a retired cop for five

years maybe i i'm too heavy to like bend over and pick up ammo i should get the fuck out of this country right the guy with the donald trump rambo flag and he's like fuck this i'm fucking out of here you know that's that's another thing my father-in-law does have by the way that donald trump rambo uh thing and he also has a format a doormat on the way in and says don't blame me i voted for trump and every time i go to his house this is the wildest shit to me he has a gun that he shows me in his bedroom not in like a um threatening way not no it's more like how impressed are you that i have a gun isn't this really neat brian and like he also though has a trump sticker on his fucking uh bed headboard and i just find that to be the craziest shit in the whole world

but i could see him thinking like i could see him if this was 10 years ago i could see him thinking like i could be a real asset out in ukraine right well that's where the right wing shit gets even crazier because it's like the guy who you worship is like pro-russia but you're going because you're also just so hell bent on violence or thinking that you're an important part of uh america that you're gonna go there to fight like it's there's so many layers of weird that the overly trump love like i get it fine you voted republican shit everyone has different beliefs you're incorrect unfortunately but the stuff where it's like i know a like 60 year old millionaire from connecticut who at his 60th birthday had a trump cake and like a trump

cutout that he was taking pictures with and his his 60th birthday was after Biden had been in office. And I was just like, I couldn't believe it. I could 60 dude. I know. And I'm like, you're a millionaire. You've won already.

You're retired. You have a wine basement. You have a wine cellar in your house. You have one. What the fuck do you need? I don't even think Biden being in charge would affect your life that much man like it doesn't even change for you I know I know and in the way that they like it is very weird to me to be a guy that I'm I'm 43. And if I'm a dude that like,

I have an ironic, funny picture of Jonathan Davis from Korn, where it's like almost like a centerfold picture of him that somebody mailed me. It's very funny. And I framed it and put it up on my wall as like a funny thing. But there isn't like, especially a politician, there just isn't somebody where i'm like man i gotta decorate my house and whoever the even bernie sanders i was like i'm not dead

i don't want like a bernie sanders t-shirt no i don't give a about any of this yeah i mean like i i met it all matters to me but i don't like it's it's crazy enough that I wear a Giants jersey on like Sundays. Like to me, that's even a stretch too far. It's like I'm not going to play. They're not calling me up to come in there, but I like to play along and be like my team. And I feel I know that the New York Giants have no loyalty to me. And I don't like but the way the parasocial relationship people have with politicians is like it's embarrassing like i'm i if aren't not to not to quote the great sebastian maniscalco but aren't you embarrassed aren't you like shouldn't you

be embarrassed by this behavior well back and also like you just think about 15 years ago 20 years ago or when we were growing up there there just wasn't anybody that wasn't people in my life hated every politician. Yeah. Politicians were just bad. And I don't even think they were cops. Yeah. We're like, we got it. We got to have them.

But we hate them. them like i knew guys now that i have a friend that i grew up with that me and him did tons of crime together and he got into a fight with his school his son's school because his son's a football player and they wouldn't let him carry the thin blue line out to the field like it ended up in the newspaper and all this stuff and i'm like dude we used to do such evil wait you have you have stumbled on something that i've been saying so much i we we used everyone used to hate cop everyone who's so pro-cop that's not a cop now don't you remember being like 12 and being hassled by the cops i i'm a white kid from the suburbs and i cops were fucking tackling us for drinking in the park flashing their brights hitting us with flashlights all this annoying shit we had a cop we called officer kruger because he was like freddie kruger and everyone hated him

and he was like the town cop and we everyone him. And including three of the guys that I was friends with that all hated him. Two of those guys, like two out of three of those guys are cops. They're probably evil too. Like, I'm not saying that your friends are evil, but they're probably the evil kind of cop. Yes.

It doesn't make sense. I know that you grow and you change change but there's never been a part of me that's like i really deserve to you know get beat up by the police when i was a teenager for for smoking weed or something and i would say 99 of the people i know who are cops if i like asked them why they got into it they would start talking about the money the overtime the pension and they're out in 20 years and i'm like okay cool i don't think that's worth it to have a gun and hate everything and be could look at everyone else around you as enemies and targets like that's that's terrifying and and i think you were sold to like a false idea of like oh well it's 20 years and i'm out but like it seems to fuck with people's heads being like it's it doesn't all this to say

like karate we were sold on cops we were sold by movies that these are the things that were good that would help stem the flow of like and it turns out that was all like all the shit that we were being told was like fascist. And now now we are dealing with like a fascistic takeover. It's crazy to think about. So Black Belt magazine did a recent article of how are they still in publication? I'm sorry. Yes, this is brand new. I'm subscribing are they still in publication I'm sorry yes this is brand new I'm subscribing you're right I'm gonna subscribe June 9th 2020. Jesus how is every other like industry crumbling but black belt magazine is still going into 2020. it's so awesome gotta be sick to read though it's got to be so good this is 10 reasons you should open a

dojo plus three extra by floyd burke in june 2020 by the way you should not open a dojo in june 20. if i could go back in time and say don't open one now it will maybe wait two years and then open your dough 20 it's like two months into the pandemic. Let's get a bunch of kids in a small room breathing heavy. The first reason is school owners often say, I stopped working the day I opened my own business. And they're right. You'll get to do what you love, teach martial arts. No matter how many hours per day you may spend at your new school chances are you won't regard it as work now that's not true at all it just there's zero truth to that

you're because i complain about doing this bro i was just about to say take it from two guys who make money talking like about stuff they want to talk about. And I'll tell you, it still feels like work and I chose it for myself. Now I'm sure running a dojo seems like fun until you have a fucking leak in the bathroom. That doesn't sound like a good time. Well, number two says the dojo will be yours. You can run it the way you want and you'll have to answer only to yourself. You'll have the freedom to set your own schedule and your own hours. You get to choose all the people who help you run the facility, which means you can set up routines and procedures just the way you want. Now that's all good. I do kind of agree with that, but also you have to be open

during hours that people want to come in so you do get to pick your own hours like i get to pick my own hours but if i owned a place that depended on people coming there you probably couldn't walk for seven hours a day no no absolutely not number uh three you will be oh this is a good one right here. You will enjoy being economical when buying inventory to resell in your pro shop. Of course, you'll also need mats, heavy bags, striking shields, a few BOBs. I actually don't know what a BOB is. I don't know.

Maybe, I don't know. And some training weapons for the dojo floor but you can acquire everything for much less than it would take to just buy one machine in an auto repair shop for example if you were like thinking should I open a dojo or an auto repair shop it's dojo 100 percent dojo 100 cheaper than buying one machine from an well then i was gonna be a mechanic or a sifu i guess i'll go with sifu since uh the the machine that raises the car up costs more than a fucking speed bag you gotta wonder you gotta wonder dude like how many dojos go under every year like it just has to be i i drive by a sebu con karate place all the time and i walk by it and it has been open for the 13 years i've lived in this neighborhood but i never see fucking anybody in there and anytime I see that I just think it's a front it's like for an evil Ninja gang or something dude I I'm just realizing now that there's probably people

who have like no real love for martial arts that have opened up a school for the just purely the business part of it it's not a good it's the worst investment i mean it's such a misuse of your time if you're not fully into it like you find yourself being like look i just need like the way like people become cops because it's got a good salary and you get out in 20 years it's like you know running a dojo is actually kind of smooth sailing it's like great i have no karate experience no kids experience but i'll be teaching eight-year-olds hammer fist and fucking inside out block or whatever roundhouses and sidekicks you just wonder like there it is not in the 80s this was a great fucking situ a job to have but any karate or you have to put a gi on in 2023, it just, it's not, I mean, Cobra Kai might have given them more business.

Like, maybe, like, people are like, I want to learn because I watched Cobra Kai. Which, hey, look, you know, I don't like the show necessarily, but the fights are very cool in that show. Like, the people seem to know how to do. The show is crazy. It's like a comedy and it's the oc at the same time like i i don't understand how it works i don't love it i don't hate it but it's just like old people doing karate young kids doing karate like i'm like i don't even give a fuck about any of the characters in it and when i turn it on i can't turn it off like yeah warrior blew my

fucking mind well warrior i'm a huge i'm a diehard fan of warrior i i know if if that fucking zazlob dude cancels the next season of warrior i will i'm gonna go karate him dude it has to come out i'm so amped for season three yeah uh i know i get worried every time they're like oh they decided not to make the supergirl movie and i'm like oh what does that say about warrior yeah i know i get worried every time they're like oh they decided not to make the supergirl movie and i'm like oh what does that say about warriors yeah i know it's like warriors even like lower fucking ip and but i'm a huge fan i'm a huge bruce lee fan as the guy who's uh we'll jump back to the 13 reasons why in a second yeah but uh your guy who wrote the letter of like where can i learn reputable aikido I went through that via

Google in LA. I decided I wanted to learn specifically Jeet Kune Do, which is Bruce Lee's martial art. I have the town Jeet Kune Do on my bookshelf over there. And I wanted to be like, and so I'm like, if I had Black Belt Magazine and letters to editor, I would have written a letter and be like, do you have a recommendation? I found I found this guy there was two one was an hour away and one was 20 minutes away the 20 minute one is in a park so I do go to a park a couple days a week and do karate out in the open do Jeet Kune Do out in the open with other adults it's I feel like TV you're on tv too i know i know i feel insane i feel crazy i'm like showing up there like what are you doing like uh i work in entertainment like i want to be like i host a travel show i'm a comedian this box uh people walk by people no doubt but i mean that's cool though like your thing it's totally cool and fine for you yeah it's

not anti my image right it doesn't blow up my spot people are like he is a freak loser that's like his whole brand he's an adult a child adult it's like fine let's give it to him but i that's how much martial arts has stuck with me is that I still train and I want to do it more. If I could afford a private instructor to come to my house and teach me martial arts every day, I would just that will be that's how you'll know I've made it. When I'm like super rich, I will have a daily martial arts lesson in my house and I'll become like a fucking crazy like fingertips pushups guy who has like all kinds of weird gear and shit. crazy like fingertips push-ups guy who has like all kinds of weird gear and shit action star too like well yeah maybe if you can learn a little bit of choreography i mean i look at like bob odenkirk and i'm like that motherfucker learned how to do it like i felt like when he did it that was the time where i was like you know what i can fucking do it probably like if if given the opportunity i think i could

be like a john wick yes dude i swear to god this was like john wick all these movies like inspire me i'm like these guys are not they didn't have years of martial arts training before this they just got and i'm talking about from the acting perspective they just got into it like tom hardy is like a legit brazilian jiu jitsu guy now like he's like entering in tournaments and like that it's like you can learn stuff i'm like let me learn stuff now and it feels crazy to want to learn as you get older like especially something humbling like physically where you're like you know you have like a like a 19 year old kid being like it's like this dude and i'm like i can't move my leg like that he's

like i don't know what to tell you you're like i'm sorry like i'm i'm 41 and obese man it's gonna it's gonna take me a minute i mean it's like when i do like uh workouts like on the tv when when every once in a while i'm just like oh i gotta get a youtube workout up you know it's time to start working out and i refuse to do the modified version but i get hurt every time every single time but i'm like i'm not gonna oh i'm flexible i'm good and i'm not i'm like the least flexible i'm like a board basically put the full weight on there i'll be fine it's like wait what you've never even done this before it's like racket let's go my wife is always like you need to stretch and i'm always like it takes too much time i don't have time to stretch i never stretch and i know i should stretch every fucking thing i do and i was even working out for a while at a gym lifting weights

never stretched when i got there at all i just went in there lifted the weights stretch if i don't stretch i feel insane like because we used to roast my dad for he would always stretch in public because he was a martial artist he would like at our at my brother's soccer game uh notice i didn't say at my football game that we'll deal with that in therapy. But he would like put his leg up on the bleachers and like stretch and like, you know, he would be like in like tight jeans doing like full like leg up shit like, you know, like weird. And I'd be like, oh, my God, how fucking embarrassing. And now I'm the guy like I'm out for a walk and I'm waiting at a red light. I'm dropping down and touching my toes and like stretching my back and hamstrings grabbing my ankles to do the quad stretch I'm like I've just fully become this

monster number four running a dojo is the most honorable way to make a living you'll be serving your fellow citizens by teaching the way of the warrior which will enable them to defend themselves as well as their family and friends i can't believe a guy talks about the way of the warrior in fucking 2023 like i feel like i need to do a full series and talk to black belt magazine writers please i would fucking i i'd listen i don't even listen to any podcast i'd be down yo that is so it's the most honorable thing you could do is teach a five-year-old the way of the warrior i teach a whole family of add kids the way of the warrior and i think it's gonna i think it's the most honorable job i could have

okay how about this how about number five you'll be helping them acquire what you have better health and skill and self-defense the only way to get these benefits is in the dojo so you might as well make it your dojo okay okay as a businessman man you know hey if i was a better businessman i'd have more money he his ideas aren't like out of left field that makes total sense in a way like but it is yeah it the 2020 of it all is where it just the argument comes undone every single time for me well number six you'll be able to do martial arts as much as you want you'll be getting paid in essence to train teach and work furthermore you will be able to attend martial arts seminars and shows while writing off the associated expenses the same goes for trips to train with an out-of-town instructor or master

now that is true for people that don't do like an entertainment thing it's like you really can just be like well uh i had to fly to i had to fly to la to interview somebody right and you're gonna get that paid for that's so fucking funny like that it's like and think about all the tax breaks you can get on karate seminars it's like a big selling point i want to go to a martial arts convention like a convention not in columbus they do the arnold classic which is an arnold schwarzenegger i love i want to go so bad oh if you come i will go with you i live like one mile away oh fuck dude i will come i will go to it i've been meaning to go my whole life the arnold classic has been like i've always i love strength sports and physical like i love all that too i mean you gotta see you gotta

see columbus during the arnold classic it's the wildest place in the world it just is like it's full of like really ripped or big huge guys and every restaurant downtown is basically running like a two steaks for $20 deal or something like it's all like protein and steak and stuff dude the fucking sewers in Columbus for that week must be bananas my sister works in a restaurant my sister used to she still works in a restaurant in a hotel right by the convention center but she used to work directly across the street at a restaurant and uh you know i know a few other people work restaurants too and they do say during the arnold classic the toilets get clogged i can only imagine yeah i mean because where i walk every day i walk through the convention center so all when they're doing it arnold classic i'll just walk straight through it i was out there a couple years where i walk every day i walk through the convention center so all when they're doing

it arnold classic i'll just walk straight through it i was out there a couple years in 2020 when they did it they had the guy maybe it was 2021 they had a guy outside hustling people at arm wrestling and this is like happening in the street in just a town this guy's standing outside and he looks kind of he's a famous arm wrestler and i don't remember his name and i took a picture of him online and people were like oh my god that's him but he doesn't look tough and he was just fucking whipping ass on all these like big ripped guys out in front of the place yeah this is like being at the kumite of the place yeah this is like being at the kumite the iron fist tournament number seven you will enjoy a health and fitness boost these are the real necessities in life because you have

nothing without them as a dojo owner you'll be immersed in an environment where being healthy is encouraged similarly it'll be a place that lets you evolve mentally and spiritually you won't be in the rut that most people find themselves in, where they're surrounded by folks who don't seek enlightenment or self-improvement. This is why most people come to your dojo, and you can follow the path right alongside them. Wow. Hey, it's good for the self to be creative, and owning a dojo will inspire you in this area. You can create as many of your business and promotional materials as you wish brochures

posters fine T-shirt teaching aids and so on. I like that too. You can fucking make a brand dude But that's so funny. Like that's so not a pitch for a guy who's really into martial arts Just think dude, you can make all these cool presentations in arts and crafts. It's bro i'm just a fucking third degree black belt i don't give a fuck about oak tag you can draw a tiger you can get you can you can fucking make a shirt with a tiger on it dude imagine you got a tank top with a fucking tiger on it how sick that would be oh man that would be so sick number uh nine everyone is into social media these days running a dojo will serve as the impetus you need to get up to speed on the technology you'll also enjoy knowing that

your social media posts will carry your positive message to masses far larger than your student body oh i do like well you know you'll have an excuse to get on Twitter. That should be nice. I got to start following more dojos on Instagram. I would love this. I mean, that big dojo life. Have you looked at that? Yes, where they have the photos of old dojos and shit like that. Or even the ones where they have instructors saying they can do the death punch and and shit like that like they have they

have like guys they it's true scams on there especially on instagram the mcdojo life thing i i like will scroll through it and it's so funny what people think uh martial arts is so this last one is a good dojo will make an impact on your community hoping one will also give you a platform to have a positive effect on people in the community when you see kids who were raised in your dojo go and live happy productive lives you'll take pride in the part you played in their success operating a dojo can be a boon to your family okay uh if you're married and your spouse is in the martial arts your marriage can become even better if you're married and your spouse is into martial arts your marriage can become even better if you're those are two huge ifs if you're married and if she's into martial arts as

well uh doing my wife is not into martial arts dude like just do you have kids if so know that raising them in your dojo is a unique experience there will be plenty of upstanding people to help out and all of them can impact a child's life in a positive way so i hope we've talked at least one person listening to this episode of this show into opening a dojo yes i mean and if not you have 10 plus reasons uh why you should so So like wrap your head around that. I would love if people would tag us on Twitter if they are adults who still do martial arts. I'd love to hear from other adult martial artists and what they are getting from it. Not. Yeah, I'm not saying I'll respond or even hit you with a heart on it, but I am very curious if there are other adults who are doing martial arts

that intrigues me a lot and is there a martial arts convention that me and brian should go to let us know what's whatever the biggest martial arts convention is i want and if if it's the kumite in hong kong i'll go we it's an expense for us we'll do an episode about it we can make it a tax deduction i will go i will go to a martial arts convention if it's any obvious i'll come i'll come to you to go to it i i i will i'll go we'll probably be going to the arnold classic together but also i will definitely go to a martial arts convention with you that sounds fucking awesome that would be great well john i want to thank you for doing this please um it was incredibly fun it's always fun to do stuff with you.

I mean, man, every time we hang out is what I'm calling this. Every time we hang out, I feel like more and more I'm like, you're like a weird fucking cousin of mine. We're so fucking similar. It's crazy. It is. It's fucking nuts. Well, tell people where to find you.

I'm at Gabrus on all social media. If you're listening to this, you're probably a fan of Patreon. If you're a fan of Patreon and a fan of martial arts, might I recommend actionboys.biz, my action movie Patreon. We have over 300 episodes now, so you can jump on for a month, listen to a bunch, jump off, do whatever it takes financially. And then we have free episodes, too. You can search those wherever you get podcasts, get a free episode get a little sniff get addicted um they're average to be three hours long about movies that are average 100 minutes

long so it makes it's brutal and weird but i if you're at all into it check it out uh yeah dude oh and uh i will be fighting in this year's coup if you could support me please i'll be managing him we should start a gofundme to send me to a kubitay hey i'll go i'll be your manager i'll tell you you know watch out for this guy's chop or whatever i mean i watch wrestling you should know some yeah it the only thing is you you are my manager but you insist i do the christian judo and i'm not i'm not a fan hey look i do christian stuff well this has been so fun uh we'll see you next week i actually don't know what oh dave navarro i believe is the guy that will be

focusing on dave navarro so a specific guy that's a good guy he's got a lot going on he's got a lot of angles a lot of depth you can get into there goodbye bye it has