Guys: With Bryan Quinby - Guys: Episode 40 - Wine Guys with Riley Quinn

Episode Date: November 14, 2023

We had Riley Quinn from Trash Future on who is an actual Wine Guy. We talked about the Snoop Dogg wine, we learned a bunch about what can fuck a wine up, we look at whether or not bourbon guys or wine guys, look at a Tony K style vinyard review and some wine gadget reviews https://twitter.com/raaleh https://www.patreon.com/trashfuture There is much more Chris at youtube.com/noteveashow and twitter.com/notevenashow and of course https://www.patreon.com/notevenashow And for more Guys content, streams and SHOCKTOBER: a deep dive into shock jocks you can click patreon.com/murderxbryan twitter.com/murderxbryan and twitch.tv/murderxbryan

Welcome to Guys, a podcast about guys. I am Brian. My co-host has notes of cat piss and gasoline it's chris james what the fuck quick chris james is a sauvignon blanc he is yes oh wow so okay so a little bit of shade being thrown at a sauv blanc right out of the gate from our guest i don't know anything about it i don't drink alcohol at all and i when i did drink alcohol which was a long time ago i did not drink wine unless it was you know if it was free yeah like a last resort type situation where i really wanted to be getting drunk you know and our guest i'll go ahead right our guest is riley quinn from trash future a wine

guy what's up riley hello i was gonna say that uh there are some bottles of wine in uh just sitting in the backs of pubs that have developed thick patinas of dust on them uh that i have considered as last resorts also so now see for me i would think well if they got a bunch of dust on them that means they're old and therefore must be good and that's not correct uh like so many things in the, it's old, so it should be good, but it actually, literally, they say it tastes like cat piss. I had never seen the negative words for what it tastes like, but a lot of times they'll just say it tastes like alcohol i'm like and as a non-drinker i'm like well that's what it's supposed to taste like i hate to inform you that alcohol wine is supposed to taste like alcohol it has alcohol in it yeah it notably yeah notably has alcohol in it it's one of the main selling points. And I think we'll get into that a little bit.

But to me, I think there's a lot of wine guys that are older people that like to drink alcohol. And so they're like, hey, this is a more sophisticated way to do it. But they're also interested in being a little bit drunk as well. Please do not reveal our secret. At the end of the day, all the scoring, all the Robert Parker, all the Hugh Johnson, all of the notes, all of the... Why are you saying those names?

We don't talk about guys these are some of like the original uh wine guys yeah so here's the thing about wine right the main thing about wine and why a culture of guys in a strange set of bits of language we're talking about it have emerged which is that you cannot know what a wine is going to be like until you open the bottle and commit to drinking it you do not know okay so it could be so even if it's like you're saying like a producer like somebody who's like got a really good you know oh this guy's got a great this people these people have a great reputation it's aged it has it could be good you never know it could actually be bad yeah well mean, there have been I was at a restaurant in Spain last year where against my own better judgment, I ordered and this was to go with like a slightly strange dish of grilled lobster brain.

What I thought lobsters didn't have brains well grilled lobster head basically okay yeah grilled lobster head really really cool sorry that's a lot of shade being thrown at lobsters from brian over there i hate lobster i don't eat seafood at all no i don't no i understand okay you hate eating log okay yeah fair no no no no i i also lobsters have claws and they can hurt you so i don't like that either i so i'm just gonna i see so i'm a genius and riley you're talking so this is because this is important too it's like yeah when you eat food it's like you have to have a certain kind of wine that's basically that's basically what a sommelier is because if you're eating if you're eating in an upscale restaurant i'm not chances are if one is chances are like you're

saying okay well i'm getting the i don't know i'm getting a prime rip for example easy to pair but you know let's let's say right or like like a filet mignon right filet mignon a little bit higher uh fat content um and a little bit more tender probably you're going to go with like a like a merlot based bordeaux why now just now now why do you sorry yeah let's let brian let me clarify the scene is this restaurant playing loud rock and roll music because that's a problem in that case it doesn't matter how good the sommelier is they get one star they get one star yeah uh look i only go to restaurants that are very very snooty so i can be d snyder from twisted sister and freak out the sommelier by jumping on the table and playing guitar

oh that's bad yeah no no so basically so philly mignon right not very much it's a leaner cut right so you want to have like you don't need more acidity to balance out the fat like really what you're looking for with wine is balance you want the different things sugar alcohol um you want these things at acid you need them to be in balance good lord it doesn't mean that there's always the right ratio of them to one another but if one is too overpowering then you're not going to enjoy the rest of it basically sugar and acid and um alcohol my god what are we talking about one of my teenage parties i would eat a lot of candies and i was uh also high on acid and uh drunk on alcohol as well as a joke we're talking about three o'clock in the

morning in the quinby house when we're talking about sugar you know oh yeah brian brian is a famous midnight sugar eater is so is there a lot there's a lot of sugar in wine uh there's some again it varies right there's some wines that are more dry which means they have less dissolved sugars some wines that are more sweet and again it's like one of the crazy things about wine why it's so hard to just like straightforwardly compare them to one another by the way this all went from a comment that i made earlier which is that all of this filigree all of this ideology all of this is so that people can feel like they're improving themselves when they get a bit pissed. Yeah, exactly.

And I respect that. I respect that. Like jumping through all these hoops to like, as long as of course, I've dealt with alcoholism in my family and my life and stuff. And so when it gets serious, but if you're just masking a little bit of mild alcoholism with your kind of good time wine tasting, I kind of have respect for that. I think it's fine i i mean i think it's a weird thing because the first thing i wanted to do on this episode before we even got to any of the material i have is kind of try to figure out because we've done one other alcohol

episode and that was bourbon and that's not true we've also done cask ale we've also done um oh yeah real ale are you into that riley have you ever had uh real ale because real so i'm for listeners who aren't who listeners who i'm just meeting for the first time despite my accent i do live in britain yeah um and this is like there is such a type of guy attached to real ale that can only be understood as graying ponytail and utilikilt, which I'm very glad that you covered. But I'm not really a real ale guy. I really just drink wine. So is there much like there isn't a lot of crossover between those two groups? I wouldn't imagine there would be.

But the bourbon thing was also. So there is more of a dignity to wine i've found and i'm going to tell you why yeah we read a lot of bourbon guys who were like seriously sneaking bourbon in under their coat and putting it on the shelf so their wife didn't know they were buying bourbon now i went to the subreddit. I went to WineBerserkers.com and a few other sites. And a lot of times what I'll do is I'll search wife on those things because that's where the funny stuff is. You know what I mean?

That's where guys are like, oh, you know, my wife won't let me buy a 700 bottle of bourbon or whatever and they're like complaining about it uh and i didn't see a lot of that now what i did see a lot of was guys being like uh you know my wife the funny one i saw yesterday was uh somebody's wife ordered some wine thing a passport or something that, ordered some kind of box of wine of different wines. And the guy's like, hey, I was just sitting at home minding my own business when this big box of wine came here. Can I open it and look at the bottles? And everybody's like, well, of course, like what's your wife's mail? And I think she wanted it to be.

think she probably wanted it to be but i found i'm i'm gonna start out here with i went to wine berserkers.com which is the premier wine site that's surprising because like the name doesn't seem like you know like it seems so classy but then wine berserkers seems like kind of like a almost like a rough name for them this is so this is a huge trend actually in like wine marketing the last few years okay of uh so it's especially like new world wines although a lot of like australian or american they'll have like quite um rough names so like one yeah like one of the most expensive wines in the world what's called a cult cabernet from napa so cult cabernets are like from your californian wines that are um like made in small quantities and beloved by bankers basically uh screaming eagle is one of the most expensive wines in the world really yeah we're gonna get to one in a little bit that seems to, I'll say it now for people, but we're going to talk about it a little later.

There is a wine that seems to show whether you're a real wine guy or not. And I don't know if you know about this, Riley. The Snoop Dogg 19 Crimes wine is really fucking. So I was reading, I'm trying to find a site where they review wine right where regular people review wine not like wine and hamburgers or whatever that website's called i i don't i can't believe i just said hamburgers like that was the last food it would have been but uh the the that like they were like hey you know i usually you they said what site do you use to find good wines and they said vivino oh yeah and uh somebody the next reply was well they gave

the snoop dog wine a 4.7 so i'm thinking it's the wrong site and so i went to reddit and i searched for it and we're gonna read a bunch of reviews of it but it seems like if somebody says that's good it is like the worst thing you could possibly do in the wine community but i could i mean that seems like it just has more to do with the preconceived notions and stuff like no it has to do They're all buying it because it has Snoop on it. It isn't like they're not. It doesn't read as like racist or anything like that. I just mean, not even racist. Just like I wasn't even thinking explicitly racist.

I was just thinking of like this fucking celebrity musician, like rap artist, you know, like that just has putting his name on wine. And it's sort of like, you know, almost like perverting this beautiful institution that we have or something. Yeah, like, is that not the case? There are so many celebrity wines, some of which are actually regarded as being pretty good.

So I come from, before I moved to the UK, I am Canadian originally. Oh, sweet. Me too. I live in Canada. i am well brian's not he lies about it and where's the toronto blue jays happen yeah where did you live in canada i grew up in town called niagara on the lake which is canada's wine southern ontario's wine country yeah i knew that i've been i usually go to i grew up in southern ontario's wine country what do you mean i like grew up in ohio you grew up in columb. It's wine country. What do you mean? You grew up in Ohio.

You grew up in Columbus, Ohio. It's a state in Canada, Ontario. It's a province. I don't know how I got to explain this to you. It's called a province. What if Canada's classic states? It's a province. They call them provinces.

Also, can you tell me three more cities in ontario uh no no not you not you riley oh sorry i think you're quizzing me he's like yeah you niagara in the lake snob you don't know anywhere else from here i know you know them ryan no brian don't look it up stop i'm not looking i'm not typing winds typing Windsor. Okay, that is what I've got. Toronto. Yeah, he's looking at something. You can see his eyes reading it.

We don't need exam proctoring software to see that you're looking at a screen list of cities in Ontario. I'll teach you what I'm looking at, okay? This is from Bob Wood on Wine Berserkers, and he says, Belpente Murto Reserve. He's reviewing it, right? And he goes, nose of cranberry, rh reviewing it right and he goes nose of cranberry rhubarb nose nose of cranberry that's what he said nose of cranberry rhubarb what does that mean nose of cranberry means what it smells like yeah but so that because that but don't they say notes isn't that though it's different okay the nose can have notes yes and it's notes are the things that you smell or

taste so like for example if you taste something you're like yeah this kind of tastes a little bit like green pepper or whatever you'd say notes of green pepper if you're smelling it you'd say notes of green pepper on the nose if you're tasting you'd say notes of green pepper on the palate not on the tongue just have to let my girlfriend in sorry riley not on the tongue just have to let my girlfriend in sorry riley's got to go let his girlfriend not on the tongue they say palette why not nose and tongue dude chris they say everything fancily yeah i know i understand that but nose doesn't seem that fancy you know but yeah i get it i get it listen i and i i think i understand what you're saying in the beginning about them

being fancier and and in some ways i don't want to say better than the bourbon guys or whatever but yeah it definitely seems like it would be something they would do with their wives but it does seem more i don't know so it almost seems more respectable for some reason it's a different kind of person that i think yeah i like more than i i don't personally no i don't it's not that i don't like them more i just don't dislike a bourbon guy in that way like i think that yeah but but i i think there are some pretty awful wine people like really really rich really rich older wine people who are like you know country club type people for sure i think are but i mean we're maybe riley we're talking to riley right now who is a wine guy and he's back by the way um and he he's not a bad he's no he's good that's what i'm saying yeah i'm telling you that i think the wine guys are less.

I mean, we know they love to get drunk and we know that they get so mad. I'm about to read this thing here. He goes, a little meat and a telltale myrtle spice. Seems to change about every 10 minutes. Similar palate with a weight that goes back and forth from thin to substantial and mouth-filling. Fine-grained but substantial tannins that argue for bottle age consumed with ancient heritage adele a local sheep's milk soft ripe and cheese a sourdough baguette and pate de bambi i don't know what that is sucks that's pate from a deer yeah it says sucks

don't buy it i poured most of the bottle down the drain so the first response is from randy bowman and he said uh having the palate of a yak has its benefits now so is that is he saying he has the palate of a yak or the other guy the other guy does yeah the other guy doesn't like the wine so he goes having a pallet of a yak has its benefits like yeah that's a pretty strong insult i appreciate that i also something that sticks out to me too is it seems like there is a lot of wine being produced all over the world and there is a lot of different things happening to produce that wine and when it comes to bourbon it's just kind

of like a couple of guys with some barrels and then they like pappy van winkle says this is the good one and then everybody marks it up nine million so i think not to say it's completely legitimate the wine thing but it seems like the the the like um price of the wine has some more legitimacy to it rather than just being pumped up by this like internet market you know depends to me it depends okay so it depends it's yeah i agree this has to be propped up by an internet market i would think some ways but do you think i'm just saying less so less so than than bourbon i can i can kind of explain how wine gets its price and let's just leave off hype and um let's just leave off hype as like a

big part of it we're going to explain the other bits it's tough for me i'm very hyped but yeah i'll try all right so basically when you're making when you were making wine what you're interested in is like the best description of winemaking i've ever heard is that it's an extension of farming um you want to have the grapes that are um that are healthy so you don't want to be using 100 of the grapes that you harvest you want to be using maybe the top 10 of the grapes that you harvest from your property if you're making wine from grapes that you grow on your property right would it be safe to say if you were if you're a wine producer it'd be good to be a one percenter you call your you say i'm a one percenter i only use a freaking one percent best grapes and would you be considered sort of a god i would say i i use just the single best

grape per hectare yes that's what i'm saying you go through and then you have it like you actually put it to a bunch of tests and then you only pick the one best grape. And then, so you produce one bottle of wine, you know, one tiny bottle of wine made from one grape. No, no, no. You had over many years and then you eventually you make one bottle of

wine and you sell it for like a lot. So sorry, sorry, Riley, sorry, sorry, Riley. I apologize.

No, it's trying to, how dare we fool around in this comedy podcast. You're trying to give useful information. I know I annoy people sometimes chiming in with complete nonsense that doesn't help anything. Well, that's the thing.

On this podcast, you usually talk about the guys, but it's not often you talk to the guy. Yeah. I mean, sometimes we have. Sometimes... I'm trying to think. we had tom on who was a bourbon guy at some point but not currently yeah not currently we have like people that are sometimes we'll have a guy that is exactly like the guy and then other times we'll have a guy

that's the exact opposite of the guy because that's also has its funniness i do want to say though if you're in a hobby or you do a thing like like uh if you do one of the guys things one of the guys we covered let's just say like fucking the real ale guys they want to be in the one the top one percent of the hobby like that's the goal when you get into something like this and you're doing this like very seriously, you want to be in the top 1% of the thing. You want to be the 1% of people that actually, and I've seen a lot of this, you want to be in the 1% of people that people think actually understand wine, which it seems like a lot of wine guys don't actually, that's like a very hard thing to come by. Yeah. So it's like, there's a lot of wine guys don't actually that's like a very hard thing to come by

yeah so it's like there's a lot of people who are really excited about about wine i think there's a number of reasons for that uh it's i think a it's like it just has this history and this mystique of being a kind of um of being something that is that is refined but that also has lots of stuff to it, that it's something you can get interested in and stay interested in and just devote more and more and more of yourself. One of the things I think is that drives people

to obsession with hobbies is the ability to specialize. So once you start liking wine, you're not just picking white or red, you start picking countries, regions, grapes, producers, almost like producers, almost like rock stars that you might follow you know so it's like jean-louis chave is like the king of the rhone valley yeah that's what i'm saying at least there's so many of them and not just that one like pappy you know like at least

there's a bunch of like golden gods that you can look up to and it is kind of it has like a sports feel almost to it as well you know that like oh shit look who came out with like you know something you're cheering on your like favorite region to come out with like a great new wine also can i ask i want to ask this like is there some premium and sort of being the guy that discovers the good wine or is it basically like hey they use these kinds of grapes in this part of the country so this has to be good wine so there's no such thing as anything that has to be good wine yeah we that's what i learned early on you never know until you open the damn thing up and taste it brian that's the only way to know for certain and part of what makes a wine expensive is oh there's a few things

that can make a wine more or less expensive right one of them is that a lot of cheaper wines and also some more expensive wines have to taste the same all the time like a gas station wine like an off-license wine like we call it here like a casillero del diablo has to taste the same every single year at every single off-license across the uk it always must be identical which means there's a huge amount but also they have to make a huge amount of it and they can't they don't sell it for very much money which means that they have to use quite a lot of relatively substandard grapes and then they have to do an enormous amount i don't know what cassio del diablo does by the way i'm not looking to their process but most of these mass market wines will then go to like conventions of chemicals and colorings and stuff

and then just basically chemically flavor the wine so it tastes exactly like they want it to taste no thank you not for me i'll be spitting that out and not in the way that you're supposed to do it when you're doing your wine tasting but here's the funny thing some of the most expensive wines also do something not entirely dissimilar they may not do it with chemicals but the big champagne houses right so like um like moette and that's only based in champagne otherwise it's called sparkling wine i actually have a champagne review here for a little bit and then but that's for something from the region champagne region of france right brian i'm just using the no piece of information. No, I don't think it is. That's actually a sparkling.

That's champagne. Brut refers to the level of sugar, so that means it's drier. You're fucking smart as hell. You're really smart. I'm not trying to make you uncomfortable here, but you're like you have answers for something,

and you're so well-spoken about it. And then there's me over here. I mean, I've podcast for a living, and I had a decent life, and I don't even understand how to do that. You know? What I was saying about champagne, though, just quickly, is that that Veuve Clicquot

has to taste the same every bottle every year if it's non-vintage, which means they don't remark the year. It has to just because people count on it to taste the same. And if it doesn't, they'll complain like they would if apple juice tasted different at the grocery store. Or it's also just the different traditions of winemaking. Because that's the other thing. Depending on where you are, winemaking is incredibly regional. So Burgundy has a different set of traditions than champagneundy has a different set of traditions than Champagne, has a different set of traditions than Bordeaux.

And also rich mahogany as well. Come on, Brian. We're having fun, man. What the hell? We're chapping around. We're joking. So I have, let's do this. Because the most wine, wine guys I found were reviewing snoop wine 19 they love

reviewing so how long has snoop but wine been around for what's the what kind of a wine is it where's it where's it called 19 crimes and the one we're gonna read is a that's not a real year that's not a real year no we're gonna read a 2020 cali red okay 19 crimes now this guy on reddit red okay 19 crimes now this guy on reddit derelict drams i read this and it's a little long but i promise this guy is what i believe to be a wine guy okay through and through uh spoiler alert this is not good i got this as a gift from someone a while ago unfortunately i can't remember who it was if that's a gift that would have been purchased. Unfortunately, I can't remember who it was. That's a gift that would have been purchased at a gas station. Yes.

That would be a gas station. You're saying that was a last-minute gift, Riley? That's a last-minute gas station gift. That's an on-the-way gift. Brian, read that last sentence again because I think it's a good one as well. Unfortunately, I can't remember who it was. If I could, I'd never talk to them again. Okay, so this person potentially does have a drinking problem or something like that because it's like this is

a big thing that happened and you don't even remember who gave you the wine well and i'm currently trying to get through some of these lower tier bottles to make more space in my wine cooler you can just throw them out you don't have to drink them you can just get rid of them riley i'm starting to think that this guy likes likes his drink you know what i'm saying i'm sorry i gotta make my way through these bottles to make space i can't believe the only way i'm going to declutter my house is to drink all of the booze in it god sorry that i threw up in the bathroom honey it's a space issue i needed to make space i also like the guys that say this is more of a third bottle of the night kind of wine

you mean like when you're completely drunk and you could be drinking grain alcohol and it wouldn't matter sweet that's one of my favorite ones that they say ordinarily i wouldn't bother doing a review of something i can't get through even a single glass of but this one was so particularly offensive to me i feel incumbent upon me to help spread the word lest some unfortunate snoop dog fan should be wandering the aisles of their local liquor store and stumble upon this and feel like they've actually discovered something like like a 60 year old elected democrat like who is that i know well first of all also like kamala harris if a snoop dog fan bought the wine i can guarantee they're not gonna have the same critiques they're not gonna even understand what a good wine you know they're not gonna be tasting it in the same way they're gonna be like

at the end of the day did did I feel intoxicated on alcohol? And if they did, I think they'll be happy customers. Well, let's start with the color, which is undoubtedly the least offensive part. It's dark and opaque, quite purpley for a Cabernet, closer in appearance to something like a Malbec. That is quite unusual. Like that's the Cabernet wouldn't ordinarily be that color. Yeah. He goes, I don't know. Could this person be wrong? appearance to something like a Malbec. That is quite unusual.

Cabernet wouldn't ordinarily be that color. Could this person also be wrong seeing it in a weird light? Looking at it in a weird light or something? There is a defined process to how you taste a wine in a structured way that involves looking at it against a piece of white paper

so you can calibrate. I'm'm not joking that is what people do that makes total sense to me yeah that's the weird part is that like they're doing this with wine with snoop dogg on the book why bother yeah unless you say when i was so when i was like 13 and first on the internet i used to like do what i think of as probably the most annoying thing i've ever done which is because i was like when i was 13 i was like drawing the atheist a and stuff like that kind of thing you know if you need to know that's that was me at 13 and so i used to like i was really concerned that there i had basically i don't know the politics of someone who likes green day and i was concerned that like george bush was going to install a theocracy and that was going to somehow affect canada um and that i was i used to like making myself mad by

reading christian movie like christian reviews of mainstream films there's like they're like oh there's a little bit of bad language. I'm trying to have me not have bad language. Like that kind of thing. To me, this sounds like an adult purse, an adult reviewing a present that they got snidely so that they can make them mad on the internet. And get what I was doing at 13.

Yeah. It's very childish because I don't know if they add anything to affect the color, though judging by the notes that are coming later, I wouldn't be surprised. Almost certainly they do. That's the only way you can make wine a mass product is by chemical intervention, because you can't replicate the natural processes

at the scale you'd need to make 19 crimes wine. Yeah, you fucking fine idiots you morons on the nose this smells like wine in the absolute barest sense there's some vaguely grape-like aromas muddled with what the hell is that wet wood cough syrup a container of something long gone off at the back of the fridge it genuinely smells like it could be something infectious it's cough syrup one that's used often to describe the taste of it yeah it genuinely smells like it could be something infectious. I'm not sure about that. It's cough syrup, one that's used often to describe the taste of it. Yeah.

Yeah. But perhaps that's the point. You're only meant to put it in your mouth rather than spend any length of time trying to pick it apart. Let's start. So that. I hate to get mad at this wine reviewer, but, like, he's saying sarcastically the thing that's true. You're just supposed to drink this. This isn't for wine aficionados.

It's like walking into a kid's movie and being like, well, there's very little sophistication in Paw Patrol 2. This is all very surface level stuff, to be honest. Well, Vivino has... It's like an adult man being like, I would love to fucking kill Justin Bieber with a wrecking ball.

It's like, okay, cool, we get it. You're not a teenager. We're very impressed. Well, Vivino has Snoop Dogg reviews too by regular people. This is a 2.9 star review. And he goes, Wine in the name of Snoop Dogg, hoping for cutting edge bulb flavors and fierce nose.

Unfortunately, a bit more of a labrador puppy not one to be added to a must try again list so uh no one who has who's who's having a what sorry this is i'm now stuck on how like on this sort of wine edgelordism that you've discovered which is something i've never seen before yeah it is it is these guys are like they want to throw out like really good insults and they're the kind of insults that if you were writing a movie a rich guy a really rich out of touch like where it's like like the same movies where like an old white guy would rap someone who Dee Snider would absolutely fuck with in a music video from Twisted Sister oh yeah

the kind of guy who would be sitting with a monocle in a fancy restaurant and then Dee Snider would run up to him and say he wants to rock and then he would fall off his chair backwards and he would say well I have never but they're

tasting a gas station wine. Yeah, they're trooping on it. They don't understand that they're much more aligned with the Dee Snider character in that music video. This guy, he's a rapper who says the first shizzle thing. He's the one who did the first shizzle thing. This is his wine. He can't be talking about the notes or anything. You want to know who makes a wine that is worth talking about the notes of is Dan Aykroyd?

Of course he does. He also makes the Crystal Skull stuff. Vodka. Yeah. Well, Russell gave it 2.0 stars, and he goes, well, this is just awful. I'm getting flavors of tobacco mixed with dish soap in this wine. It should not have been made. Sorry to the winemaker, but I've tried to be generous with my two stars.

I'm sure the winemaker is just fine. Probably lives in a big house. It's like getting mad at the brewmaster at Bud Light. Yeah. Really what these guys are doing. Sorry, your stuff's a little watered down, sir. guys are doing you know sorry your stuff's a little watered down sir and then the guy from bud light is like the guy from 19 crimes is like on vivino and he's like like oh no my gas station wine's not being well reviewed it's

like i did i mean i was ah man that's terrible i I was going for, like, laundry detergent. Yeah, and I let Snoop Dogg down. Like, and that's the real tough thing for me, is, like, this man put his brand in my hands, and I did not succeed with it. You guys are talking about the winemaker. I'm worried about fucking Snoop D-O-double-G himself getting on this forum and reading some of these incredibly, you know

unkind statements about his wine that can't make him feel good no well rebel rebel element bought it on amazon and he said it's almost drinkable not a good effort one star i tried this wine at a friend's house whose boyfriend limits her to 30 per bottle for wine okay i mean listen it sounds controlling but it could just you know it could this could be an issue of um budgeting you know it was intriguing that snoop's likeness was on the bottle but just like the slot machine beat the devil watch out just because he's sorry what that is the slot machine gripe Are we supposed to know... Is this a slot machine gripe? Are we supposed to know that this is a famous slot machine? This guy's mad at slot machines and Snoop Dogg. But he's like, we should all understand.

You guys, we all know that one slot machine. Well, yeah, this kind of reminds me of that. It's like we've all dealt with. It's like how only Berlin has famous bouncers. It's like only America could have a famous slot machine. It is. It's Beat the Devil and then there's a Snoop Dogg

version of Beat the Devil. Is this just someone who's been routinely gotten over on by Snoop Dogg affiliated products? I wanted to have nothing but snoop dog affiliated products in my consumption basket and i have been bitterly disappointed by all of them the snoop dog have a food i wonder if this person is eating the snoop like he travels

the country when he hears there's a new snoop dog product yeah but he hates it he hates it with his life do you have no integra dizzle do you have no integra dizzle at all sir come on he's let down every time you know he's like fucking damn it i thought it was gonna be good he goes just because he's being paid to promote it doesn't mean it's a good idea i tried it at room temperature and i'm a forgiving critic really but this blend is not very alluring maybe her bottle was transported here on a Humvee from Afghanistan like that actually does make a difference is how the bottle is transported and stored oh like um so I couldn't figure out why it like the military brought they shot they shot the wine they put gunpowder in it

no no no like like that's the that's that's the thing it's like it's you it. So much of this stuff seems like it doesn't make a difference. But because what you're doing is winemaking is basically a natural process you're trying to control, but you're trying to interfere with it as little as possible if you're trying to make a high-end wine, then all of a sudden stuff like... And the older it gets, by the way, the more sensitive it is to these things because a lot of those early body elements like sugar and alcohol and stuff, and you might call primary flavors like fruit or whatever, those mellow out over the years and it gets more complex. And a balanced wine will age very nicely in a way that you won't be able to... It will taste different from a young wine. It will often taste a little bit less full-bodied, more delicate and all this. But as that happens, as those compounds that form become less stable, it's like phenol compounds and stuff. If it's exposed to light or shaken around a lot, then all those compounds can break

down and you can just get something that tastes unbalanced in vinegary. So if it's like left in direct sunlight, for example, for more. There are wines that I've bought where like I have had to arrange my travel of them going back somewhere. Because I've taken them back in my suitcase or whatever, where I've had to make sure like they're in like the right kind of room so that they're not like sitting in the boot of a car, for example. I'm not going to make funny about that either. Listen, you can. You really can. I feel like if I was reading a post on Guy's podcast and somebody was talking about it,

we might have like a little bit of a laugh at that. But like I said, I mean, we're all nerds for something. And it's not hurting anybody. It's making it's making you happy you're not out there on the internet you know giving people a hard time about what they're doing with wine so oh yeah it's it is absolutely like it's absolutely a nerd thing and some of the other wine guys that i know from the internet the vast majority of them are like finance guys on the buy side so they're not like the um big swinging dick sell side guys uh they're

the like you know usually they weigh like like private equity or hedge funds or whatever um and they are much more they're they're they're just huge gigantic dorks but there's a lot of rich people are into wine too but i guess maybe not in the same way they just really spend oh a lot of there are some rich people as well who are super, who are super into and knowledgeable and nerdy about it. Because that's what I think about when I, when I think of, when I think of wine,

like just like through, through like, um, culture, like TV and movies and stuff like that. When you think of people being really into wine, I think of like upper crust, um,

rich people, because I guess the best wines are so expensive as well right like so you'd have to be to the other the other thing that's something i was sort of driving at at earlier is like the relationship between quality and price is not linear it's not as though each additional dollar you add to the price will add a certain amount of quality and that's like beyond even just like things being overhyped a lot of it will just be things that are very particular or hard to come by, or like it might be the best expression of something. So I'll give you an example, right? So in France, there are lots and lots of different regions, right? One of the most famous is Bordeaux. Bordeaux has a river running

through the middle of it. And then there's the left bank and the right bank Of those rivers Right bank Bordeaux's have one winemaking tradition Where they tend to use one kind of grape Like when we talk about a winemaking tradition That's a lot of what we talk about is what kind of grapes do you use And also like how is it grown Who owns it So in Bordeaux most of the grapes are grown on property

Owned by the chateau The chateau is like the castle with the winemaking Burgundy for example totally different thing Winemakers don't tend to own their plots, or they might tend to use the same plots. Sometimes they do, sometimes they don't. It's way really chaotic in Burgundy. But Bordeaux, right bank, left bank. Right bank tends to have a tradition where they use one of a few grapes. So Merlot, Cabernet Sauvignon, Cabernet Franc, some Malbec. And then the left bank tends to be more Merlot dominant. All that means is if you're then saying, OK, I like left bank Bordeaux's. I really like this Merlot dominated style.

I want the best expression of that style. So I'm going to go get something from Chateau Petrus, which has like eleven point five of the best hectares in Bordeaux. from Chateau Petrus, which has like 11.5 of the best hectares in Bordeaux. And a lot of that will also mean like elevation, soil type, drainage, sunlight exposure, like all of those things will matter. And they'll have, it means you make more of your grapes are usable, more of your grapes are high quality, more of them will be fully ripe, and so on and so on. And so then Chateau Petrus makes a very small amount of wine that is the pinnacle of what is possible to make from the land in the left bank of Bordeaux,

from the Pomerol region, right? All of those things together mean that Chateau Petrus is super expensive because they don't make very much of it, and it's the pinnacle of what is possible to do with that kind of thing. That doesn't mean that it is 10 times as good as a 60 pound bottle of wine. It just means that it is the best you can get from there. There are some places where it's like the best you can get from Australia or from like some,

from the, I can't, where's Penfolds? The best you can get from the Barossa Valley in Australia, they use a different kind of grape there. They useiraz right and so then it might be as expensive but is it as good it depends if you like shiraz or merlot now i have a question if i drink it i get drunk and then i can make as excuse to smoke cigarettes absolutely you can yes no no no i actually read some somalias talking about like a guy's like i I want to become a Somali. I quit smoking cigarettes two months ago so that I could pull this off. So, of course, because it's going to it's going to stop you from being able to smell properly because you're going to always be smelling cigarettes. And so you're going to always say this has notes, the nose, the nose of cigarettes.

And then everyone's going to say, we think you got actually mouth of cigarettes, buddy. I love cigarettes. Wait, do you smoke cigarettes, Brian? No. I quit. He's so disappointed in himself. You can be a sommelier. Congratulations.

Yeah. I mean, listen, I don't smoke cigarettes either. I quit smoking cigarettes many, many years ago as well. Yeah. I used to love them as well. And I still do like this smell of them. You know, if I smell someone else smoking a cigarette, then I do. Riley, I have a question for you. What's the most expensive bottle of wine you've ever bought?

If you don't mind saying. Brian spent like $40,000 on a Lego set. So don't feel bad. I spent $400 on a Lego set. What's your most expensive Lego set, Brian? The one I'm building right now that is the grand piano that was like $415. And that one's actually sick because it's like a player piano that you can actually make play, right? Yeah.

But what is your most expensive one, Riley and was it good or was yeah that's what i was that was my follow-up question was going to be like did you regret the purchase did it live up to the hype i'm interested in that as someone who's really into it like what was the circumstance of you dropping a large amount of money on why yeah um so the circus so i've i'll sort of sidestep the question a little bit with oh don't you be careful with that we're hard-hitting journalists and we will not let you get out of that which is that sometimes sometimes like i i have other wine friends and so we'll often have like dinners where we all bring bottles. Oh my god, I'm so sorry!

What was that? That was like an accident! Oh my god! Brian has a soundboard that was Opie from Opie and Anthony talking about a French fucking beer. He's in my wine club, actually. I lean forward and a bill of my hat hit the button can you imagine it's like so like condescending as well like riley's like talking about like like having wine parties with his friends and brian's like oh that was like i'm sorry but that is people are going to go out. It's pretty wild for that because I don't know.

Look, I understand that you guys are the D. Snyder in this situation. Yeah, I got it. My sister just got here and they were talking. So I went to shut the door. I shut the door. I grabbed my headphones to put on and I leaned forward in the bill of my hat. At the bottom left.

You guys should have seen Brian's look when he did that. Oh, yeah yeah of course because i was another one i could have called it a flub a lot easier and at first i was like that was an accident remarkably remarkably rude too because we like asked him the question we're like really interested in what he's talking about and then you toss it this aggressively loud oh ha ha all right please continue all right all right so i let's see i'm just gonna go on cellar tracker to check the price so basically we all have these like wine dinners and people will bring different bottles yeah uh this this friend is like he's uh you know like a guy with some money. He brought a 200-pound bottle of Jean-Louis. How did he get it in the place?

That's a little humor for the North Americans. What, did he have to use a goddamn pallet thing to bring it in there? Holy crap. I thought the same thing immediately. Yeah, of course. It would be very funny if he did come in with a hand cart I thought the same thing immediately. Yeah, of course. We're a couple of fucking idiots. It would be very funny if he did come in with a hand cart waggling his eyebrows theatrically.

Just, yo, this is expensive, but our currency over here, it's pounds. Yeah, that would be a great sight gag. Yeah, a great sight. Everyone in the restaurant would have been like, yes. Oh, so this is, wait, so this is at a restaurant? No, so restaurants, we like to find restaurants that let us bring our own wine. Okay, but you have to pay them. It's owned by a friend, this one. So you don't have to do the corking fee or whatever it's called?

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Because that is a thing, right? I know this is real basic shit that you're like, well, yeah, fucking of course, corking fee. But some of the people listening don't know all of this. So you take a wine normally to a restaurant they what is the price like what would how much would they charge you to depends it depends if you like if you know them oh no you don't know them i don't know anybody that's that's the thing a lot of a lot of places like won't let you bring

wine but if they do they'll let you and then we'll charge you a fee and it depends how well you know them um there are some places that like also specialize in it where it's like we are a upscale restaurant but we specifically encourage people to bring their we have a wine list but one of our like unique selling points is we we like let you bring stuff from your cellar it's like four it's a restaurant for wine nerds we'll have a good list but also we'll be really like we'll like have a corkage policy and they i don't like 20 quid maybe they're about 20 quid that's also pound 20 pounds in case you guys are wondering quid means pounds as well i only know because i i like i'm really interested in footy you know yes well i found wait hang on we haven't even got the freaking I thought you said 200. Sorry. So it's 200 pounds. It was a... That's cheap.

It's a late 2000s Jean-Louis Chaves, this guy from the Rhone Valley, Hermitage Blanc. So it's like a white... It's a white wine, so made of Viognier, or Viognier, Marcin, and Roussan, which are three of the white grapes.

I've talked about winemaking traditions. Some places use different grapes. In the Rhone Valley, those are the white grapes that I've talked about winemaking traditions. Some places use different grapes. In their own valley, those are the white grapes that are mostly used. But that's cheap. 200 pounds. How much is that in like... A lot.

Like 250 bucks probably. That's what I'm saying. That's very cheap to me. I thought... I'm not trying to disrespect you, Riley. I thought it was going to be like thousands of dollars. Well, you can get a wine for thousands of dollars. You don't do that shit.

Okay. Respect. Respect. Okay. You have $42. If I had the money to do it, I would. You would. Is there like some wine is like you would love to have, but you can't.

Okay. There's a lot of them. There's a list. Yeah, there are a whole bunch. There are wines I have on my like to try list. There are also like some wines that like I want to have at you can't okay there's a lot of them there's a yeah there are a whole bunch like there are wines i have on my like to try list there are also like some wines that like i want to have at certain years for example like certain regions that i like and producers that i like in those regions and i'm like and you can do your research right you can okay well what was a year where in like bandol so bandol is like a region of provence that i where i like the wine that they make it's

mostly made out of more vet which is again a red grape so ince where I like the wine that they make. It's mostly made out of Morvede, which is, again, a red grape. So in Bandol, they make Morvede, among other things. And because of its position to the... It's positioned slightly towards the sea, so it gets salt breeze. But also, there are certain years where it will rain at the right times. It will be sunny at the right times, be roughly the right temperature. Do you have time to do other stuff you just not really so much stuff about it i am like i can't like the amount of knowledge that you have on it is like floor it's flooring me genuinely that you like you know so much we've ever had on the show yeah oh by by such a long shot it's not even close it's wonderful the wine hobby rewards that

kind of obsession because then what you can do right is you can look at at wines and you can say oh my god i know that like you know 2022 or not so but recent like 20 um like 90 like like 2000 or 95 i know those were like like particularly great years like like bordeaux for example i've heard that so that's what that means when they say that was a really good year it just means whatever there was something different in the weather or something like changed in the process of it naturally that made it better is that essentially what that means like when yeah yeah yeah absolutely it's like that's like a common thing that you hear a lot like oh 95 was a great year for bordeaux you you know, or whatever. What that means is that that region experienced favorable weather conditions.

Gotcha. And because like, for example. That's kind of cool. That's kind of cool to me that it's like it's indicative of something actually like different in the world, like nature. Like, you know, like a naturally occurring thing happened that made this better, you know, without wanting to get too romantic about it. I mean, the one of the reasons I want to get romantic brian is he's got no problem with that one of the things that i think people find so compelling about wine is that it is a way to experience a particular time and place and a particular winemaker's vision of how best to

express that um so you can you are tasting 1995 and at the end of it you feel a little silly you are a little drunk you're kind of oh hey what are you doing over there you're kind of giggly and everything nothing wrong with that i got so i got so wrapped up in it i forgot that the main point about it is to get a little drunk but not so drunk like you drank an entire bottle of bourbon yeah that's yeah so i went looking for the best wine tastings in the united states like that my when i went to university there was a wine tasting team oh yes i know i know they do it competitively i did know that so what what is that brian what do you mean by that brian you went to try to find the best wine tasting in what way like well they're they taste i googled it and found the best names i i went through and i said this is the best name then i went to yelp and uh i put it in there so that we

could read some reviews from some wine of some of the greatest places in the world oh so this is great places to to taste wine and they make no wine there that's what i was gonna say it must be like the vineyard like that's the best place to taste it because it doesn't have to do the this is i've learned this stuff in this episode now from riley is he doesn't have to do all the travel and stuff so you're getting it straight away without any of that you you know, outside forces. So that is the best place to get it. So this is a vineyard called Domain Carneros and is, I believe in the Napa Valley region, which is famous wine place. That's famous.

John Y went, gave it one star and he said, no go. Oh no. Yeah. He's not happy. This has been a must stop for us whenever we're in the wine country and to pick up our wine selection every two months most everything about the grounds in my original review still stands very good review five stars the place is stunning and the wines are excellent is that some music it's gonna be a music a volume issue what do we like water was too cold what are we talking here because this sounds like it was great tony k yeah unfortunately

the last several years has become less and less enjoyable for us to stay and partake of our member benefits complimentary tasting tours etc i always feel like we are inconveniencing the staff by our presence. Today, I encountered two service animals in as many minutes of being there. What? Why? I do not want to be stepping around any doggy do or have puppy piss on the walls. Is this a joke? No, this is true. What service dog is a puppy?

And also, yeah, that doesn't exist. They have to go through training. But also, like, sorry, there was two people that needed service animals? How is that the winery's fault? That's a coincidence, I guess. Also, it's not anyone's fault. It's nobody's fault at all. It's actually just a reality of existing in the world that we all deal with from time to time.

He goes, it's bad enough San Francisco is a no-go zone due to all the human crap. Oh, I see. Oh, it's an insane person. Oh, I see. It's a person like this who doesn't really care about other people. He reads the fancy sort of way he's talking in a way he goes uh we all know that they can get these fake service animal vests and certificates for cheap on amazon or ebay sorry no no no no i believe this this person is making

a mistake here because they're thinking of the fake like um emotional support animals or whatever i don't think there's people who are getting fake service animal things and claiming that they're so i've never even heard of that concept he does say what's next emotional support parrots or flamingos can my friend bring his goats um domain carneros needs to grow a pair and kick these people off of their Premises They can't do that That's so illegal

It's completely illegal They would be shut down I think I mean doing the right Thing sometimes Is hard to do And the right thing is to Kick these people out Because they're blind You might not feel like you're and the right thing is to kick these people's kick people out because they're blind

yeah you might not feel like you're on the right side of things kicking out these blind people uh but you are bring back real service for the members and the public this is what puts you on the map in the first place you know what put them on the map in the first place was no animals so it was not it was probably the wine they may come for the wine but leave due to the abuse by the staff we sure did sadly today was our last day there and we canceled our membership of over 10 years and i only replied with something so i hope it was go fuck yourself and don't and don't come back no i he goes that these 10 pound dogs were most definitely not service animals you chose to look the other way in search of more dollars pure and simple you cite california law but ignore the part about verification of

eligibility as a service animal uh why should a winery be verifying eligibility hold on hold on hold on we don't want to get any puppy piss on the wall so we need to be can we check those vests we've had a big issue with the amazon vests just getting ordered in can we just verify these vests they just have a different thing on the end scene where we can tell if it's real or not i would like to this person i think it's i think i don't mind saying this i'd like to to hit this person yeah I think it's, I think I don't mind saying this. I'd like to hit this person. Yeah. A one-star review because people brought service animals.

And just the way, like, being abused by this, like, I'd like to hit this person. I'm sorry. That might not make me a bad person, but I'd like to hit them with my hand. As a wine guy, I'd like to dismiss them from our ranks. Okay. You do not count them as one of your...

I do not accept this person as a fellow wine guy. Well, Markham Vineyards... That's in Ontario, no? I think it is, yeah. Because I did get one. I did get a few Canadian ones. But Markham Vineyards was reviewed by Scott P. It got one star. And he says, of the eight vineyards I reviewed by scott p it got one star and he says of

the eight vineyards i visited on a recent trip only one had wines i rated as low the tasting was poorly thought out and seemed unorganized and the person doing the pouring was more impressed with the sound of his voice than with representing the vineyard well and can i ask before we move on riley is there a is when you go to like a tasting of some sort with a with a somali that's that's taking you through he's he's come up with this thing yeah so i did that pretty recently i did one of those in august um because i was they're supposed to talk right they're supposed to be talking quite a bit that's the whole kind of idea of it right i was i was in um i was in italy for a friend's wedding and we was near like one of my favorite wine regions and the italy slash the world uh which is montalcino where they make a wine called brunello di montalcino

um and there was a winery there uh called paggio rubino where i and some university friends went for a tasting. And yes, the person who was pouring it didn't just silently come up and pour some glasses and then walk away and leave us to guess what you were drinking and what we should be looking for. Yeah, you don't like you're paying. It's like saying, like, we went to this stand up comedy show and the guy on stage wouldn't shut the fuck up. It's like that's how it feels to me to say that the sommelier came up and he wouldn't stop talking.

Well, this goes back actually to something I was saying really early on, which is when you want to spend money on a bottle of wine in restaurants a lot of times or even at a winery and they're trying to sell you wine, you can't know what it's going to be like until you try it and so the sommelier has to be able to talk to you in a way that you're going to be able to get a rough idea of what it's

going to be like when you drink the wine otherwise you're not going to buy it especially if it's at the high end of the market you're not going to they're not going to be like it's red it's fine go for it unless they have some kind of crazy good reputation. But even then, you're just using the reputation as a proxy for the description. Well, Scott, you'll find out with the next sentence why Scott is actually mad. He immediately assumed

we knew nothing about wine. Oh, there we go. This guy is like, he's just sitting there the whole time going like, yeah, I know that. Yeah, of course. Duh. Here's another strange sentence. Let me get to this next strange sentence and we can talk about why he's mad.

He goes, the immediate slum we knew nothing about wine, parentheses, wrong assumption, and came across like a con man teaching a kindergarten class. Uh-huh. I don't... So this is another one of... Is this a Coen Brothers movie? I don't...

All I could think was kindergarten cop. But that's a cop, not a con man. This is another one of these people who is trying to complain in a way that makes them sound fancier than they are. I know, because nobody, I don't know, somebody, if you're listening to this and you want to tag me on Twitter, Blue Sky, and say what it means to say came across like a con man teaching a kindergarten class. No, no, no, no, no. I get it. I can clear it up for you. He just came across like a con man teaching a kindergarten class. Oh, no, no, no, no, no. I get it. I can clear it up for you.

He just came across like a con man. They're two separate thoughts that aren't meant to be joined in that sentence in that way. So it's like he came across like a con man. And then also like he was teaching a kindergarten class, like talking to us like we were children. So like addressing us like we were completely ignorant and knew nothing. But he also kind of came off like a con man. That's how I take it at least this guy is one of my favorite kind of guys which is you know he goes to like a tour we we had we dealt with it in the bourbon tours as well all the time where

it's like they go to this tour and somebody's like explaining stuff and they know it and they're mad about that you know they're just like i already know all of this stuff how dare you don't how dare you you don't like understand and know all of the things that i know before why don't you let me give the tour exactly that's really that's really yeah riley that is it that is honestly and at the end of the day that's what this guy wants he's like what but what should have happened was this dumb fuck should have understood who the big man was and he should have fucking turned over the reins to me and he should have fucking was this dumb fuck should have understood who the big man was. And he should have fucking turned over the reins to me. And he should have fucking sat down and listen. That's such a standard dumb guy fantasy,

which is like the, we need someone really good at video games to fly the plane. Yeah. Just applied to something fancy. That is very funny. That, that is like a total dream to be on a tour and then the guy's like well this one has notes of whatever and he's like actually it has notes of

something else and then everybody in the tour group is like this guy should it's like when you do stand-up comedy it's marine todd it's marine todd oh sorry were we you do stand-up comedy. It's Marine Todd. It's Marine Todd. Oh, sorry. Were we talking about stand-up comedy? I don't know, Riley. I used to do stand-up comedy. I don't talk about it a lot because it's not a big part of my stuff, but I used to do it. Were you going to say something about stand-up, Brian? I could maybe get in there.

Yeah, or podcasting or any of that stuff. Oh, I've done that as well. I've done that as well. Yes, me too. And it's kind of like when you talk to people who don't do it and then they give you a bunch of advice and you're like yeah okay well like okay what do you know about this you know but uh perhaps i just caught the wrong guy it happens to make matters worse though he did not recognize that we already paid when we booked our reservation and charged us again that you can be mad about

well that is fair double charge i think you could take that up you could probably get a charge back there take it up with management unfortunately i hadn't kept track either some charge up front others don't but when i realized the double charge and tried to rectify things with the reiner winery winery i was ignored still waiting for a response. Rhinery, rhinery. Rhinery, yeah. Now in four weeks, somebody's going to say rhinery, and I'm going to be relaxing in Alaska, and it's going to drive me crazy. It probably didn't help that I came from another tasting down the road

that was a lovely professional experience with outstanding wine. Yeah, and they let me drive the bus. And then it probably didn't help that I had nine or 10 bottles of wine at that tasting as well. And I was extremely intoxicated at the second one. We went to TripAdvisor also to look at some Napa and Sonoma wine country full day tours. Riley, do you have to do you have to run or I do? Yes. OK, no problem. Do we, Ryan, how much more do we have? We can finish it. We only have a little bit more to do. So we can finish without. Ryan, how much more do we have? We can finish it.

We only have a little bit more to do, so we can finish it without you. What more do you have? I usually... I booked out an hour. Oh, shit. Yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

We can... Let's just... We'll do these last... I probably have like two left before we go. And we can call it... Why don't we we do like this it would be really funny if if riley like had to run and then he left the episode he listens back and as soon as he leaves we're just like what uh let's do this uh i'm gonna share this with you riley and chris so that uh you can see what this is this is the coravin timeless sick special edition wine preservation i hate to be that guy but these are really useful

three hundred dollars worth the price worth the price i'm sorry like the um if you okay this person just fucked up the using the coravin sorry oh for sure for sure no this is because that's the other if you open a bottle of wine a clock immediately starts ticking as to when it turns into vinegar and so this is a thing that just lets you pour glass it uses some like clever like gas replacement technology thingy that allows you to just pour little bits out of a bottle of wine without like fully opening it i see yeah though that's just someone who fucked up using their core of it it's quite useful the best reviews in the world on amazon are that um as you can see from the attached photo the corvin six actually removed the cork from my wine it's a

very expensive corkscrew the force from the gas will remove your corks this was an expensive bottle of katherine hall cabernet sauvignon and i wanted to preserve unfortunately i did not waste one of my vintages on this piece of garbage but i want to use a corkscrew i have plenty of them in my kitchen but if i want to use a corkscrew i have plenty of them in my kitchen drawer in addition it's kind of a rip-off plenty why don't you just why don't why do you need you don't need corkscrew i have one i'm a i'm a wine hobbyist i have one yeah it seems like just one in addition it's kind of a rip-off the package was supposed to include three argon cartridges and it only included one don't believe the videos. Don't believe the reviews.

Caveat emptor. Avoid this piece of junk. I'm not going to believe you, ma'am. I'm going to believe my new friend, Riley, who is one of the smartest guys I know and knows everything about wine, and he told me it's good. And I'm not going to listen to Jay Alexander,

who's probably Jason Alexander, George Costanza from Seinfeld. I don't respect his opinion at all. Have you seen a wine chiller cooler stick? Three in one. It's a stick you stick in your wine to make it. I wouldn't put stainless steel in the wine. Okay. And just to be clear, I just want to say Jay Alexander was another review on screen.

People didn't hear that. Just so you don't think that i'm completely nuts you know this is again like you would actually you can use like little pourers that what they do is they put it through a sieve so it gets aerated faster just basically means it decants more quickly because the process of wine aging is the exposure of that chemical those chemical compounds to oxygen that slowly causes them to change i see so if you the wine, the reason people like decant wine or pour it through a little thing or make a little slurping noise when they drink it

is to just get oxygen through it. Because when there was someone earlier, it was like, oh, it tastes like one thing and then it tastes like another thing 10 minutes. And 10 minutes later, that's oxygen reacting with it. And it can happen that fast. These things actually are real. Wow.

Yeah. Jay Alexander says, I wanted this so bad. I love a cold wine and don't always have a bottle in the fridge. So in the past, if I opened a bottle off the rack, I'd just throw in an ice cube, which was fine, but not ideal. This sadly was not up to my expectations. Two issues. You cannot put in a full bottle. As soon as you stick the cooler stick in the

bottle, the bottle overflows, which should have been obvious to me, but I was too excited to use it. This is someone who really wanted a drink. You weren't excited. Come on, come on, come on. He needs to get a buzz.

Wasted quite a bit of wine. Once I did get it in it get a buzz yeah yeah wasted quite a bit of wine once i did get it in i don't think it worked great and chilling the wine and it pours out so slow with that nozzle again he's just complaining he's just complaining that he didn't get wine fast enough yeah he just wanted his precious wine fast enough and he wanted it cold he wanted a nice cold wine you know you wanted a nice a nitro cooled wine well they should do that so before we go the presti store on amazon sells 100 plastic champagne flutes that are disposable and they're for parties okay fine makes sense so far i'm with you riley has anyone ever brought a wine to one of your wine parties and it was so bad and everyone was like, oh, stinkeroo. I'm actually going to be honest with you guys. When I was really into natural wine in 2015, that was me.

You brought one that everyone was like, ugh. I used to bring stinkeroos all the time before I was like, wait a minute, natural wine, well, trendy, sucks. I'm just going to have a good wine now so did your friends did they like say stuff at the time or were they they did they were just like yeah yeah yeah yeah there was a there was something in my in my friend group called riley wine which was like weird and unapproachable natural wines from like small because i was like oh it's so cool it's like a small producer in france who uses only like natural yeast and it's unfiltered and you taste it. It's like this tastes like apple cider filtered through a gym sock.

It just happened to be really trendy in London at the time. Gotcha. You guys caught up in the trend. Caught up in the trend. I got caught up in that. So here it is. These party cups, I call them. This guy goes, half of these were unusable because they fell apart embarrassing

us in front of our reception guests having read the other reviews we opened one package and assembled them ahead of time to check but that one was fine save yourself money and embarrassment and choose something else i wish i had believed the other reviews this reviewer jacked off to being embarrassed in front of all their party guests. It's funny when you're like, this thing I didn't make, I'm embarrassed about this thing I didn't even. Like, I wouldn't fucking care if I bought them and they fell apart. It's like, fuck, I bought these off Amazon and they fell apart. There's shit.

Brian does not care about embarrassing someone at a party. Just ask his freaking sister or whatever at their wedding when he was the DJ. Just ask his fricking sister or whatever, their wedding when he was the DJ. Well, let's get out of here, guys. It is. Riley,

tell people where to find you before we go. First of all, boy, it's been a delight to come and talk to you about wine today. And our car, third secret cohost, Opie, however,

I would hit the button. I'm not good. Yeah. If you like, if you're a british person or like british stuff uh i do a podcast called trash future that's about not really that but about how technology is terrible um and is tearing everything apart uh brian's been on a couple of times yeah uh so uh you know check uh check we talked a lot about like the way that like electric vehicle companies were hijacking the hopes and dreams of Ohioans to scam them. So do check that out. But thanks a lot for having me again.

Yeah. Thanks for coming. We'll talk to you next week with menswear guys with Jesse Thorne. Bye. Bye, everyone.