Guys: With Bryan Quinby - Guys: Episode 71 - Renaissance Faire Guys with Jesse Farrar

Episode Date: June 11, 2024

We brought Jesse on to talk about Renaissance Faire Guys and plenty of other things. My sister told me that I should be a renaissance faire insulter so we looked at the most famous insulter. We looked at the nuts and bolts of how to speak at a faire and some of the things that grinds their gears You can find Jesse at https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/your-kickstarter-sucks/id1204911385 and https://www.twitch.tv/gooffkings There is much more Chris at twitter.com/thecjs and of course https://www.patreon.com/notevenashow And for more Guys content, streams and SHOCKTOBER: a deep dive into shock jocks you can click patreon.com/murderxbryan twitter.com/murderxbryan and  https://bsky.app/profile/murderxbryan.bsky.social   Guys has a Post Office Box now! PO Box 10769 Columbus Ohio 43201

Here ye, here ye. Welcome to Ye Olde Guys is a podcast about guys. I am Brian and my mundane co-host is Chris James. What's up? Oh, shit. This is it's been a while since there's been one that I just have absolutely no idea. I'm a randy. You're a Dane. A Dane. I know a Dame. A Dame is a lady, right?

And that time. But what's the name? is a lady, right? In that time. But what's a Dame? Like a mundane, just like a boring person? Loser that doesn't go to Renaissance Fairs. Okay, well then yeah, that's pretty accurate. And we have as our guest, Jesse Farrar. You're not mundane. You're probably a big time Renaissance Fair guy. I know you love leaving your house. OK, well, I don't like that. That's how I'm. That's not good. That's what you're saying about me.

That seems like a problem. No, I haven't. I haven't been to a Renaissance fair. No, you're right. You you pegged me there. Oh, sorry. Different episode. Oh, yeah, that's every episode of this guy. Honestly, though, has anybody like this is one of those ones where I sort of only know Renaissance Fair guys from like popular culture, you know what I

mean? Like from like making fun of them kind of on shows or movies or whatever. And I don't I guess they probably exist. Brian's about to tell us about them. But I would imagine a lot of them are just like the younger people are doing cosplay now and it's sort of taken over from the renaissance fair stuff. Maybe I'm wrong. My sister is a cert. My sister and her husband are certified first of all swingers and renaissance fair guys. They use part of it right. People say it is I can't find any real evidence, but I think that's cause they're trying to hide it. I mean, I mean, you found some evidence. It's not exactly. It's not evidence of widespread, but you know, the only Renaissance fair people you know are also swingers. Yeah. And fluffy. The,

the, the term fluffy is like a thing in their community and it means the way that women push their titties up at the Renaissance fair. So there's a lot of talk about titties. Yeah, they wear those push-up... I definitely do know they seem... I know when I look at them, you know, of course I go, oh, go, go and all that. But then also I started thinking to myself like that really seems very uncomfortable and like a degree that's like beyond the pale for beauty is pain. Yeah, I've been told that I'm not sure I understand it, but I have heard that. I don't wear anything comfortable, Chris. So I can look good. You know, well, looking good. Are you are you doing are you doing video of these? Is this video going out? No, it is not.

So no one's going to see your outfit. Oh, man. I got this nice shirt on I bought in Toronto. I want I wanted to give you a chance to talk about your swag. That's why I'm cute. I'm setting you up here to let's let's let's speak on it a little bit. Tell us about the shirt. Tell us about the hat, whole thing. Yeah, let's hear about this this outfit Yeah, definitely it sort of does it seems like a little bit maybe from a different era But it is kind of a cool look as well like not in a bad way the 90s the 1990s

Okay, I would say late 90s but but but in a good way like it's like kind of got that cool retro kind of feel to it. You know, what's the brand I bought it at some hypey store in Toronto. Is it grim? Grim? It says what's as that winners and losers. It's winners and losers. And it is a every time I wear it and there's a picture of you, people do compliment it. And then I'm wearing Lululemon shorts. The, uh, not only your five inches, no, no, no, no, no, no. The 10 inches with the cargo pockets on the side, but no zipper.

And then, uh, some Adidas shoes and a hat. I mean, my hat, my skeleton guy, had, I think it's a Las Vegas team Las Vegas minor league team. My wife got it for me. So I uh, you know, but I mean this is not What they call in the renaissance fair community garb Um because that I this is what I wear every day. This is not a costume. This is I see so you're every day Yeah, jesse's got a jesse. You got a good outfit on as well. I do want to say. And I think it's probably why he brought this whole thing up.

He's no loop back around to him so he can talk about his fan. He's got a pink, pink Marge Simpson hat and a I guess it's like a teal shirt with a pink logo. I don't I don't see the brand because of my phone. It's a it's a Nike shirt. Yeah. I don't see the brand because of microphone. It's a Nike shirt. Yeah, I got the Nike shorts. Oh, wow. Yeah, yeah.

And he's got this Nike socks as well. He's fully matching. I mean, this is just, it's never been more clear that someone has started a conversation in order to talk about this. I'm wearing just a standard, I'm wearing an orange long sleeve Stussy shirt and it looks great. California. Yes. Oh no, I think it might have originated in

Vancouver. We're talking Renaissance Fair guys. I know. I'm looking because I do have a man that we're going to check in with his name is Christophe the Insulter and something that my sister is, as I said, her and her or my brother-in-law are really into this stuff. She makes your sister is a swinger. Was that something that was like common knowledge? I gotta tell you the truth. I don't think she's sucking him fucking. I think her husband. He's in. She's a mess. Oh, what? Wait, wait, wait, wait. Wait, is this is stuff I've heard. I haven't talked to her in like five years, but no hearing from other people

in a family that are they have a deal. You OK, so you're estranged from your sister. Is this a sister that you ruined the wedding? Wedding, this doesn't, she and I have a great relationship. One of the reasons I'm busy tomorrow is because I'm helping throw a graduation party for my niece who is her, I'm not DJing it, okay? Don't, I would.

Brian, you have to be more respectful of your listeners. You are saying like 10 to 12 things that we could talk about for the whole episode. Yeah. Like rapid, like give us a second to breathe a little bit. So, okay, so you are you are estranged from your sister? No, you're not you're good friends with your niece, but you'd haven't talked to her in five years But you are gonna see her tomorrow. I have two sisters. Yes. There's two different people Okay, I was gonna I do know this from just doing all these episodes of Brian and talking to him. He has two different sisters here. That's confusing enough.

One lives in Louisiana and is a cobbler and makes chain mail for a living. Very cool. Oh yeah. And the other one. Oh man, she's cool as fuck. She's the most annoying human being you've ever met in your life.

Brother, I was being genuine. I wasn't like making fun of his sister. I was saying that's cool. A cobbler like that's I mean it's like the stuff we're talking about today. Right. Right. It's kind of cool. She seems like an interesting person runs like oh yeah she's great. Yeah I mean she's she's very annoyed. She's just an annoying person. You know if you anywhere near the Gulf Coast, she calls and screams at you for not coming to her house. My brother, she knows she how does she know you're there?

My parents are real close to her. My she's real close to my parents. But my brother, yeah, so we're like related, right? Their daughter. Oh, yeah, like my parents have this weirdly close relationship. So anyway, when I she got married. Yeah. And I was like, oh, you know, we're going to go to the wedding down in Baton Rouge.

And we got a Baton Rouge. We drove down there. This is like in 2003, 2004, we drove down there. The wedding was a goth wedding was done by a druid. And my sister was wearing what she called a blood red dress. It was red and her husband was dressed like, like, I don't know, like an interview with a vampire kind of guy. OK, OK. Yeah. I get married.

We went to a biker bar and they danced like real weird. You know what I mean? Like old timing. And that's the two things I remember. And the third thing I remember is my grandma was like, you should write for a TV show like Seinfeld and I was like, Oh, yeah, I should that would be a good idea That's actually a job. I should go look for yeah Yeah, you um, you should sort of try may start think about trying to work with them nowadays as well

He's got some cool projects on the go as well currently my sister Being a little more realistic. She wanted to be a little more realistic. She was like, you know what you could do? You could go to the Renaissance Fair and be an insulter, which I guess is around and insults people. Now we're going to meet Christoph the Insulter today. He's the most famous Insulter, but I don't think I could dial in. Well, he's not the most I mean, that's obviously the

Roastmaster General Jeff Ross, second most famous. Well, this guy is Christoph the Insulter and he's very famous and we'll be making it through his video, but let's do some, let's, let's read some stuff here. I hate Jeff Ross. I hate that guy. I do too. He sucks man. What did you see? Did you see it? He killed at the Tom Brady roast He absolutely slayed it was it was an execution I-82 he Was an execution I just watched this I can't even stand looking at him anymore

So ugly he looks so I know it's not him anymore. He just looks so ugly. He looks so, I know it's not nice to say, but he looks so physically ugly. He looks ugly. He looks so gross and he looks like sweaty and nasty smelling even. He just looks gross. The reason I said it is because just like an hour ago,

I watched like 10% of a very, very long tick tock video from Dane Cook. And he started out like, let me talk about the controversy of the Tom Brady roast. And I don't even know if there is one. What was it? What? I didn't, I don't even know. He, he didn't like the first two minutes of it talking about how much

everybody fucking annihilated. So I was like, well, I'm out. But he was really, he was, he being praised all over Nikki Glaser and, and Jeff Ross. And then, but, but the striking thing about Dane Cook to me is also how extremely ugly he is as well. He became very ugly. He made himself ugly.

I feel like Jeff Ross, it was inevitable. He couldn't stop it from happening. Dane Cook did it to himself. And Jeff Ross looks like he got blasted by like an ugly ray, like something. Yeah, it was a car accident. Yeah, he looks like he should wear it. But not he. He looks like, yeah, he looks like a guy like something's happened to him in a superhero movie.

Yeah. You know, with a real regret. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. He looks fucked up bad. Well, the the the first thing we're going to do here, I did find this post and I'm just this is just kind of like the way they talk here. It says, hear ye hear ye. Does anyone know any promo codes for norcal rim? Look at a brother in up this also. Can I get a diddly diddly also?

Also, I am looking for the night to say no. Oh, so hang on though. He's this person's kind of being a little silly. I don't think this person might be making fun of promo code. Yeah. And a reply and says I can't find any discounts on ye old Google. That's good. And then the OP is like, nobody responded to it and nobody like

upvoted or anything. And he goes, Wow, not even a chuckle. I thought that was a knee slapper for sure. And then he gets a reply and goes, Oh, sorry, for sooth and an odds bodkins even. So that was just a, is there, I have a question for you, Brian, cause we're, we're, you know, 12 minutes in here. And I understand we do about an hour or so of these episodes. They're going to be talking like this the whole time. Talk like this. I'm going

to tell you the truth. There is like, do they ever sort of just talk in a normal kind of way? Well, I read that one first on purpose. Uh, I did get a ren fair glossary here, so we can, uh, so anyway, the bathrooms are called privies and those are porta potties. Uh, dragon is a aircraft that flies over. So if a plane flies over your Renaissance, you say dragon flew over my Renaissance. Ignore it.

Yeah. I mean, don't just ignore it. It ruins the vibe. Carriage is an automobile. Yeah, that I guess it depends. I think you are like, ideally, you want to be doing the Renaissance Fair out in like a forested area where there's no cars, right? You want to be able to sort of detach yourself from society in that way.

Yeah, but the reality is, is they're all at like the fairgrounds, right? Yeah. Well, they're just over the parking lot, right? It's a parking lot. The one that's here is really in the worst place of all, because it's like equally as far away from any of the major cities. And but that's good. Like it's bad for getting there, but it's good in the sense that it is.

Is it at least remote? Is it at least like where you can sort of suspend your disbelief? You know, well, I don't think you can do that. Is it in cave in rock? No, that would be cool, wouldn't it? I've been to a thing at, well, it was a Buckeye like the year I went to gathering. I did get this list of good toasts that they do.

Somebody said, hey, can I get a toast? And I was, so I was like, this may be good. And he goes, Zachy says, uh, here's the cheat and stealing, fighting and drinking. If you cheat, may you cheat death. If you steal, may you steal a woman's heart. If you fight, may you fight for a brother. And if you drink, may you drink with me. Like, I listen, I guess like in the heat of it, do you know what I mean? Everybody's kind of like, everyone's a bit rambunctious and they're a bit drunk. And there's sort of that.

Like I can understand that might that might hit. You know what I mean? That might like, like that might like have some power to it. But when you just hear Brian saying it, it really sounds fucking corny. And I want to say that we're pretty far into the episode, but they are seem like nice people. They don't. Yeah. Yeah. Nice people having fun.

Like I like it. But I don't mind it either. I don't think and especially like, listen, they're literally they're not getting up in your face. They're they're going off and doing it in their own area. They're just going in and having fun. There's nothing wrong with that. What is the, sorry, not to derail, but what is the, have you guys done like a power ranking

or like a top three, bottom three for like guys, the most annoying, like most evil guys? Not officially. Or like least evil guys? Yeah, not officially, but we have definitely discussed it. You know, it's come up. We hate past a far in guys like chive guys, like not as far as evil, but like the most annoying most annoying.

Um, and yeah, as far as I guess the most. Yeah. Who have been really evil, Brian? Have you been like who have been really, I guess, maybe lost prevention? Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Guys, those guys are kind of fucked. Obviously we don't agree with their, you know, their stance on a lot of things. So like politically, but yeah, they are annoying.

But yeah, I hate, I hate, I mean, I hate Michael Nolan's. Kevin Smith guys too. I mean, listen. Kevin Smith, not Kevin Smith, I mean listen Kevin Smith not Kevin Smith guys Chris hates Kevin Smith not that here I hate Kevin Smith because I hate Kevin Smith due to him having a patreon Now bothers me it bothers me. Yeah. He has a patreon Ryan's a subscriber to it Ryan Not anymore. I got the coin and jumped off to it. Brian, not anymore. I got the coin and jumped off. Here's a little bit of the nuts and bolts of a Renaissance fair

stuff. And this person says, help with wording. So I'm part of a dance troop that performs at Ren fairs in the spring and fall seasons. And I'm looking for better words to say for debit cards or credit cards. Any help would be appreciated. Thanks in advance. This must be a big issue in the community these days. So I'd love to hear some responses. Here's one. My fair accepts lady Vita, lady visa and sir master card.

Like master is already one of the things. Yeah. Comes up. This guy goes, I've always heard the lady visa, the master of the card, the Duke of Discovery and the new world express for American Express still makes me giggle. They accept discover cards at the rent. I don't even know discover cards.

They don't even know those don't even make their they're not allowed up here in Canada. Like these are master cards. You can use those definitely, but I've never even heard of that. Nobody, there's nowhere you can use a Discover card. I think like Kohl's will take your Discover card. Yeah. This person says, we said last Visa, MasterCard and New World Express,

but then we had not been discovered yet. Meaning we don't take Discover. Okay, there you go. They got their payment process or in line. I like that. That's smart. I do this person. Brent says we don't take cards directly.

So the guy who does the hawking for the group I'm in suggests that people can use their magic rectangles to look at the Queens Royal code or QR code, if you will. Magic rectangles. I don't like the magic. I don't like this thing. Cause you know what I mean? Like everything that's modern is like just calling it magic. I don't like the magic. I don't like this because you know what I mean? Like everything that's modern is like just calling it magic. I think is a bit lazy. You know

what I mean? Like I like the other well, actually no one's really come up with a good play in my opinion. This is all like like I think that's a problem that you just have to deal with maybe because you could do cash only. You can do cash only. My pitch would be, and I think maybe like real world people wouldn't like this, but for immersion purposes. And I think for the people who are there to do this anyways,

they might actually get off on it a little bit. Do the Dave and Buster's like coin exchange at the beginning. Oh yes. And you can like flop the stack of coins up onto the guys. You know what I mean? You have like your little script in the background. But then I guess at some point you are still having to do those initial transactions using that card.

And then we're back to square one with having to play away that. But I do like that as an idea. Maybe that one guy at the currency exchange is a wizard. And that way we just blanket that and say, he he's like he exists in his own wizarding realm. He's a wizard. Yes. Yeah.

The next person says debt rectangle. Right. And then we got I had someone ask, will you be paying by cash or magic? And I was so thrilled. I haven't heard it since, but I always hope for people to use fun words for cards. That I do like. I do like, will you be paying my cash or magic? I do like that.

It's just sort of, you know, I know I said calling everything magic is, but for some reason saying it in that way, I think that is pretty good. I'm still stuck on this. I'm sorry. It shouldn't be a wizard. It should be an alchemist. I'm still thinking about it. It should be an alchemist. I'm still thinking about it. It should be an alchemist.

He can turn your useless paper or static electricity or whatever into precious gold and you got your gold coins. I think let's just go to the Renaissance fair and let's just do this and we can make a little, what do we take 5% off of the currency? 5% off of it. What's 5%? What's 5% at the end of the day? It's not a

large portion of the a hundred percent. And then we jack it up to 10% on the way out when they have all the unused coins. Well, yeah, you got currency fluctuations. It's out of our control. Maybe instead of coins, it could be like gems. And then you just get some fake like diamonds, not diamonds, but you know what? It ruins and what? I don't know what it is. Oh, Brian. Brian's dumbass trying to rip people off with diamonds. How about this one? Something maybe like guild or kingdom card.

We accept cards from the kingdom of masters, visa, AMX, and even the apple and Samsung magic infused items. All the previous suggestions are great as well too. That one didn't land. That part didn't. But the first part was pretty good I think. Yeah, I do kind of like that. The kingdom of whatever, you know?

Yeah, I like that. They haven't really- Because you could pay with credit in those times potentially in a more like, in a different kind of way where you'd say like,'m you know I'm a member of the royalty of this and like you know so that would be a similar thing. Bring back the uh maybe uh maybe the listeners don't remember this but I certainly remember this from my youth the old time way of doing a credit card was not with an electronic uh keypad it was with a little

It was with a little carly happy. I barely do remember that. You know what I mean? I think we were kids when it was. Yeah. When it was, I never used one. I want to be clear. I never used one, but I did love it. I did try to use it one time.

I told this story a long time ago. There's this grocery store by my house that was going out of business. Oh no, that was a check because they were going out of business. And I was like, I'm going to go in there. So I go in there and I buy six cartons of cigarettes and I get in line and I'm like, let me write you a check here. And they were like, we're going to go call your bank. And I was like, never mind.

I don't need any of this stuff. You were attempting a check fraud. I was attempting to check because I figured if it bounces the stores out of business anyway. So you attempted check fraud. You were immediately found out by the person you were trying to defraud. They immediately looked right at you. And how old were you at this time?

22. So you can imagine. Remember that skinny picture of Brian where he just looks like the least trustworthy guy in the world? He looks like, least trustworthy guy in the world. He looks like, you know, he comes in there, I'll have six cards of smokes. Just let me write you a check young man. Now I know, Brian, I know how much your listeners hate it

when someone else says you were doing something insanely stupid and illegal. So I won't say that. Yeah, well, I mean, that- I know it really rubs him the wrong way when you say, Brian, that's like the dumbest thing I've ever heard anyone say or try to do. Yeah, they defend him. You know what? We need to stick on topic, please. Aaron says, I know this is probably a random question, but it's been milling in the back of my mind all week

For those of you who bring your own mugs to the fair and fill them at the pubs How do they charge you for it at least at my local fair you pay and he says X XX for a glass of mead or beer Usually one of those six to eight ounce plastic cups or you pay for the yard I'm making tooled leather mugs for my lord and I, and I would like to have them filled with mead. Our mugs would be more in the 16 ounce to 32 ounce range. Do you go up to the barkeep or wench early in the day

and figure out a cost? I would love to know how you do it. I mean, just buy the thing and pour it in. That really hurts immersion, I think, if I have to say. Some people are drinking out of those things, right? Yes, and Muffin says, I'm a beer wench, and if you bring a mug up to my pub that will hold more than one beer,

we will pour you two and charge you for two. If both glasses don't fit in the mug, the patron must stand at the bar and finish what's left in the plastic cup before walking away. Oh, so she's being a little, I don't know that that's a hundred percent. She's just kind of saying she's in the spirit of it. Yeah.

Well, and everybody at these things is really drunk is one of the main lessons I learned watching this or researching this is everybody at this thing is fall down drunk. That's kind of cool then. That makes it cooler to me. And I don't drink alcohol personally. We've discussed that many times. Brian, I don't think any of us do, right? None of us drink alcohol really.

But I do kind of, that does seem like it might be more fun. Like a bunch of really drunk people trying to do this. Unfortunately, like everywhere else in America, there is that tricky business of, all right, I'm hammered in public now to just a way to my carriage. My Lord. I mean, it's a problem. You know, you think some people may have an issue with their getting their carriage home.

Their horses, their horses might fall by the wayside of the cobblestone path on the way back to the castle. Yeah, I think there could be- Can we call me Lord, somebody to come and fetch him in a carriage perhaps. Quick question, how do you call the Lord has taken his? My Lord has taken his carriage down this road every single day for the past 10 years. And now all of a sudden my Lord's fucking needs somebody to drive him home like a baby. I mean, how

nervous how? Because I think about it like this, there's a person, if there is, if the guy's not driving home, super drunk, there is a person with them that's driving home and how annoyed that person is about four hours into the fair. Because I know when my lord or my lady gets really, really drunk and then I'm stuck like being like, Hey, you know, uh, let's move. And she won't do it. Uh, that drives me nuts. So classic though. That's like the old, that's like how it was though. You know, you'd have this rich, like, um, drunken person ordering around their driver. You know what I mean?

The person who's like just annoying the shit out of them. And like, that's absolutely correct. My Lord, you know, like has her spitting in their face. That's being married right there ain't it guys? Oh don't we all know it ache. Come on guys that's how it is sometimes I sometimes I feel like the peasant who's getting spit on by the queen of the manor. I wonder if I'm simply a jester to be laughed at.

She used to be a jester. You were like for a while. You don't know. I don't like to talk about it, but I did use to do some modern day jester. Yes, Lord Frazier of love. It says I'll walk out to the truck and fill my mug. It takes three Heineken's to do that. Wow. That's a big mug. That's fill my mug. It takes three Heineken's to do that. Wow.

Big mug. That's a big mug. That's a big mug. And it's too big. Not to reveal myself as a total stiff, but is this the operation that we have here where people are bringing in their own booze and their own like vessels and stuff like that.

And there's like milling around in the sun and then getting in the car at the end of the day. That seems awful. Yeah. You got it yeah you got it you got it now now that's the answer it's a but it's a bad idea to have three that amount of beer in a mug because it is we know it's going to get warm you can't drink it fast enough you know especially you're outside in the heat i think the hinduk can actually pour as warm so that shouldn't be an issue with that brand but anything good yeah you think the Knights of the Roundtable had cold beer? You know, I think they were probably drinking real ale. You know what I mean?

The shit that we learned about before. So I think that's what I wonder if at these rent fairs, that is a thing that happened. I would imagine it probably is right. Well, this person says, and that's why most fairs don't allow you in the gate with anything in your mug and then Lord Frazier replies and says who said I'd make it to the gate that things empty before I walk a hundred yards tis the flask of flasks of Loki that sneak inside with me so he brings a I am what is known as dependent on Doth alcohol. This guy sounds like he has a drinking problem. Do you know what I mean? Like, I think you get that at any of these kinds of events too, where it's like, oh, okay, you're telling me there's a place I can go and be drunk and it's like,

it's okay. Yeah. And they just go there for that purpose. They don't even care about Renaissance. It's also giving Reddit guy exaggerating his life in a way that he thinks sounds cool. I just, I imagine it happening. He pours one in the mug and then gets to the gate. And then the security guy says, listen, man, I can't let you bring that in here. They're selling booze on the premises

It's just we're gonna lose our license if you come in with that and he goes like what am I supposed to do? Seven dollar beer just go ahead without me just go I'll be there in a minute. Finishing his finishing and he's finishing it in the bubblies on his tongue or like stinging his tongue. He's saying, oh, and then yeah, that's I think Jesse's right. Then he's like, yeah, and he's got like one tiny little flask that's like a little bit of liquor in it. Yeah.

When Lady Renee asks, does this bother you? Or am I just being too crabby? We love the musical acts best at the fair. Our regular favorites and acts that are new to us. We try to buy the performer CDs as do many other patrons. Hence, CDs. What What is this? As do many other patrons. Hence, after listening to our CDs time after time, we like others know the words to most of the songs, which is great. However, it

drives me absolutely nuts when we sit down to hear a musical act and somebody or bodies. It depends on many how many start singing along not you get mad. I mean, that does happen and it seems like these are the exact type of situations where sing-along would be encouraged. Is this like the ultimate sing-along is the Ren Fair? Like everyone, like you were saying, girl, like we're up on the table, yeah, clashing the glasses together. Like when else would you want to even do that? glasses together like when else would you want to do that? Yeah, at a concert I understand and even then it happens all the time and people like it but like I do understand if you got like people beside you and they're like belting out you

know the T-Swift song and they can't sing for shit and you just want to hear Swift you know you just want to hear Swift go off then that's. But this is just a red fair. These are not like, I guess they're important acts to them, which I do kind of like that. How it's, that is kind of cool to me how there's like this community and now there's these musical acts that are like, Oh shit, like the fucking, you know, the dear thing sheep dogs, you know that, you know what I mean? And now they have this like people who owe them and love them. And that's, that to me is cool. I like that. Well, what about if I said, some of the singers are not in key or even defined as good singers, I ended up hearing them, which I really don't want to, instead of the performers I wanted to hear, does this bother

anybody else? What do you do since the performers never asked the audience to stop singing? I don't feel it's my place to ask the person next to me or in the row ahead of me to please shut up. But it really makes me go bad. Just move if you can, if you can't get away from it, then whatever. But yeah, just move away from it. And no, you can't tell people to stop singing along at a rent fair. Is the question what do I do to get them to stop singing?

Is that the question? Yeah. Noise you or what do I do to get it? What do I do to get them to stop singing? Is that the question? Yeah. Noise you or what do I do to get them? What do I do? How do I like, you know, how do I deal with it? Grow up. You have to live in a world with people. So unfortunately, that's when is this from? When is this post from? This is a journey. I think. Yeah, 1352. What? It looks to be 2010. It's on a four. Oh, okay. So CDs is more reasonable than I was. Well, we're here to sell at the place

where you can't say master, where you have to say master of cards or whatever. Yeah, I wonder how they. Magic. I'm sure they have some like, would you like a magical disc of my tune? You know, like stuff, some crap. So Richard Bayer says not as much as the people that talk on their cell phones or someone

sitting next to them. Chompers, chompers. We've all chompers literally exist everywhere. This is a thing that you think they only exist at a jam band concert. And then you learn that they're literally walking around chomping people everywhere Ye old chompers. Oh Sat some a hole sitting behind me were so load Loaded I couldn't hear half the songs the more of do knee was singing. So no fuck you missed the more of do knee

That's what that is dope to me. It's like and then other people would read that and be like, oh, fuck it. More of that. They're the best, you know, like they fucked up the Lord of Dunie, you know, having yes, having that built in niche is cool. I think what I'm missing is are they singing? Are they doing originals or are they doing like the standards

like that? Uh, that that that that like what are they like?, are they doing originals or are they doing like the standards? Like, da da da da da da da. Like, what are they, like what are they singing? I wonder, it's like, my man is a big number. You know, like if you sing, like beer hall stuff. But I wonder if they're doing like originals or if they're just, because there is so many of those old, like, Yes.

You could be doing and no one knows if, you know. That's the classic concert thing, right? if you go to see the band and you want to hear the stuff that you liked when you were younger and then they're like all right and now we got four songs from our new album everybody goes and takes them pissed right yeah imagine they have a new album out the fucking Lords of sorry and they have like a new album and they're like going in a different direction. Yeah, putting down the loot and like picking up the electric guitar and everyone's like, oh, no, what's this?

Stint on stage and people are like, I really don't know. Well, let's let's speaking of celebrities, Christoph the Insulter is one of the biggest celebrities in the Renaissance Fair world. And since this is the job that, you know, my sister thought I should have, which again, could never dial it in to either it's either going to be too hurtful or not hurtful enough. Like that is fine. Yeah, the line at all. You're a habitual line stepper to Dave Chappelle sketch. But the is it

just to be clear? So did the did they tour around and go to different ren fairs then? Yeah, yeah. That's what sister makes a living because she can sell chain mail all year round. You know. All right, here we go. This is before the nanny cam. All right, here he goes. Why did he say nanny cam? Those don't exist in this world. You know, here he is, there's a picture of him.

For the next half an hour to an hour, some of you will pay me handsomely to insult the bejesus out of others of you. Now, there may be skeptics among you who don't believe you have a bejesus, but wait until I've paid enough money to insult you and you will feel your bejesus being violently ejected from you. I do not like this. I don't like this guy even a little bit. I don't even, I can't even find anything to like.

Well, when you hear his his gimmick, you'll believe me, his gimmick is genius. I will say that. Jesse, how are you feeling about him? You know, I do a lot of embarrassing stuff for money, but I think this would be even me. It reminds me a lot of the pirates episode of bar rescue, except for those guys were in it because they fucking absolutely loved it.

And this guy feels like a mercenary. I have no respect for that. Pretty show and I mean it. This show is not bawdy. It is not suggestive. It is not suggestive. It is not merely risque. It is butt-ass nasty. This show is not a tip-driven show. This show runs on commission. Ask me what's the difference. A tip-driven show, which is every other show here, and artists or artists take the stage.

They do something they hope you will enjoy. They sing, they dance, they juggle shit. They light shit on fire. They sword fight themselves. They, I don't know, staple one foot to the floor and walk around in a bloody circle wearing terry cloth shorts too tight and a net hanging out. Whatever they do, they do it. When they're done, they pass the hat, you tip them and that's great. And that's how it should work. But that's not how it works here. Ask me how's it work here. All right, when we find out how it works here, to me, this guy, like, listen, he's not how it works here. Ask me, how does it work here? All right. When we find out how it works here. To me, this guy, like, listen, he's not funny at all.

He's not funny. It's very not funny. I will say Christoph the insulter. I apologize if you hear this. You're not, it's not good. It ain't funny. Years ago. I would not be this funny 16 years ago.

I could find some new or He's still doing it. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. He wrote a book recently or over these years, too I think he might be you know, he's a he's a he is a star in this community. So here we go When I say this show runs on commission I mean it runs on the fuel of you paying me to insult your friends. When you run out of friends, alas, I swiftly run out of show. Ask me, how much does it cost?

The more money you pay me, the worse I insult your friend. This is a very sort of elastic form of abuse. You can choose to pay a minimum is $10 because we are many and I am few, but for at least for $10 you can get it done I I've got a really recommend you man up and fork over a 20. Ask me why? Because for 10, you know, it's not your friend. But for 20 I'll insult your friend enthusiastically skillfully and well and thoroughly deeply

10 Friend for 20. I'll insult your friend So for 10, I don't insult your friend. For 20, I'll insult your friend. For 30, 40, or 50, I'll insult the shit out of your friend. And for $100, your friend will not be your friend when I'm done. Oh. This should be tighter if we're gonna deliver it like this.

This should be a, there shouldn't be any, there shouldn't be any, you know, the pauses. I mean, this needs to be, you're asking for a hundred dollars to do nothing. You have to be, this has to be a tight pitch and it's this is a bad pitch, but everybody, it seems like maybe this like, is it, is it possible there's some nepotism happening? He's, it could be a nepo baby of some kind. It could be the son of the Lord of some kind because he doesn't he seems like he's Skating by on his name, you know, they seem like so excited, but he's not delivering anything at all, you know

Okay. Yeah And I haven't heard him do it as insults and Anna the reason I brought him on now is because Anna says I Find it joyous when Christoph the Insulter gets a hold of a phone wielding boob and we get to vote him or her as the grand insult T for that show. Oh man. Imagine being the grand insult T and like, just because he doesn't know any of them. So he's insulting their physical appearance. Well, no, he actually is. I'll get you. He's about to do one insult here. So there's an insult for every budget. So thank you. Yes. We missed the disclaimer. You came in time for the film, but here we go. How much we got total there. We got 15. 15 total. There we go. Daina. Very well.

Daina. She doesn't cost much. Oh! There you go. Daina, you've got beautiful legs. It's just a shame we never get to admire them together in the same place at the same time. Oh!

What? Daina came to the Renaissance Festival. She's holding her cup nervously, twisting her hands together. She doesn't know what to do with her hands when they haven't got a dick in them. Wait, does he know? I don't know. I think he's only got I think he's only got, I think he's only got a set amount of insults and he kind of works. You know what I mean? I don't think this is improv improv improv improvised. I think it is a little bit. I think it's some of it is some of it is, but he's definitely got his set jokes that he's hitting and it just is kind of weird.

That one was saying too bad we can't see them in the same place because they're all spread apart. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. They're still in the same place for all intents and purposes. I mean, you know, you can see them in the same place in the room and the play. At the same time, I was saying, they have nothing to do with it.

At the same time, they're right there together. They're spread out, but you could look at them with your eyes at the same time. That was a little wordy. That was a little wordy. That was a little wordy. It didn't work so well. The other one he's just like she had no what to do with her hands when she doesn't got a car when she's not giving a hand job. She's used to giving

a hand job. She's so promiscuous that she's constantly giving a hand job because I always picture now maybe this is like a current. This is like a current thing I think of Renaissance fair today as like exceedingly you woke even because they are Turning they well, it's sad to say Chris, but it's true I think of them as the very inclusive place for nerds and all different kinds of people Who are into this culture and stuff like that? So I wonder whether he is doing the if woman slut and if man gay guy, like what else are you doing other than insulting like you dress badly

or you stink maybe or whatever, but it's super physical. Yeah, it all has to be physical. That's why those like horrible roasts where the people don't know each other and they're just making physical appearance and there's only just so many jokes you can make or fat jokes or fucking whatever. But yeah, they play so badly here of all places. I don't think I gotta pull back a little bit. Are you are you're you're you're telling me that the the Ren fairs have gone woke because because that

to me that feels like it will be the last bastion of right, you know, because this is literally a time when almost ironic, isn't it? How we couldn't even have this space as a freedom. Oh, I would say there's some pretty good articles in some pretty bad publications about that. Yeah. Well, and, and he, so there are 18 and up sections of Renaissance Fairs where you can get drunk and as there, there's more pieces in those sections. It's like a little bit. You too, okay?

By the way, I got a compliment, Brian. Your display behind, I have not seen this yet. This is a great display back here. He's finally, his wife has been bothering him to get a display table for so long and he just hasn't done it and he finally did it. And very exciting is that he's working currently on his first ever mock M.O.C. My own creation. He's always just done straight from the box, uncreative shit.

So we're really excited to see that and what he counts up. It's been a while. So here's a question asked on the forum. What single thing at fair hurls you into the depths of rage? So, okay. Maybe for some people might be not, not they. Yeah. That's my happy place. Yeah. Customers who go to fair purchase a sword

that ask or otherwise attempt to sword fight everyone in costume. Apparently people who have a few drinks in them and a sword in their hands, forget that we're actors, not actual sword dueling people. So that's a drunk, got drunk sword guys showing up trying to. Well, now these swords, these swords aren't named right? They're not, they're not handing out swords. They are like real sharp swords to draw me not sharp, but like actual metal. Probably yes. Probably things that can hurt people though. Yeah. Like a blunt object. Yeah. Yes. Yeah. Like I, it's like it's a sword.

It's not sharp, but it's not. That's why you should be wearing chain chain mail though. Right. I mean, you shouldn't be walking around unprotected like that, or at least have a squire with you to, of course drop on the blow. How about captain Cornelius Howard Duckman said, people walking around fair plugged into an iPod or texting like crazy. Come on people, there's a whole show going on just for you, pay attention to it.

Those people who ruin the fun for everyone. The downers who think the girls should cover up or that sword fighting looks too real or the whip crack sound too much like gunshots. Those are woke people. Those are woke people. Woke people are coming in there and woke people who are saying like, hey, you know, we don't

need to take women's breasts just like out on display all over the place. But it, I do agree. They should do the Dave Chappelle, Joe Rogan comedy mothership thing, right? Where they put the, what are they called? There's a name for them as well. Yonder bag, which is actually a good Renaissance word. You wouldn't even have to change it. Totally yonder bag. Yonder bag. Yonder bag. And then they put the, you should be doing that. You should not be able to bring

in a phone into the Renaissance Faire. Like that's bullshit, because then it's like you could be working so hard to suspend your disbelief and to get in that. And then all of a sudden somebody comes by with their phone and ruins it. That's not fair.

This person says, and this sounds like a nightmare. Belle Vivre says, my little things are common. Parents who are too drunk to control their children. Yeah. Cross spawn, I call them. Teenagers who are loud, obnoxious, ill behaved and make fun of other people. Oh no. Yeah, that's Kristoff's job.

Oh no, but that's, I'm, pitch, yeah, yeah, they're not, I'm picturing that these insults that these teenagers are making are much more cutting. And you know about- Okay, okay, I'm not even gonna, I'm not gonna stand for that slander. Brian, let's hear another one from Christoph the insult. Let's hear another one from Christoph. I wanna hear what he's got. Oh!

She was hoping the Renaissance has- Oh, come on. There'll be some enchanted fairy land, some forest of dick she could frolic in, unicorns with dicks for horns, bottomless, bottomless leprechauns, multi-colored dick rainbows. Dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, because somebody will message us and say, no, he needs leprechauns. There used to be these things called leprechauns. This guy, I think he's again, I think he just doesn't have it. So when he's like, you know, he's like meant to, he's like sort of frothing it up, getting it like, you know, he's like getting going, but he doesn't have it. So he'll like, you know, he'll go and just trip

over his words or fuck up something in the middle of it when it's key, like Jesse said, for those things to be tight when you're delivering them in that way, you know? Leprechaun! Here we go. Here she is. Dicks on her face like windshield wipers on the drive home Data Data, I'm not saying you're a whore. Please don't think that I'm not ask me why

whores cost money Jesus Christoff in there like this is like You could say this is like too far to say to a stranger you just met I would say yeah. Yeah. Yeah LR says younger danes who give you dirty looks because you're in garb and they think you're they're so much better because of the Normalcy of their life being normal is so overrated. What about your sheep? These people are getting made fun of yeah, they're a lot a lot of their

Frustration seems to be with teenagers mocking them I can sympathize, you know, you do go to this place and you feel like finally I'll be amongst my people You know my my nerds who are not gonna they're gonna look as stupid as I look and this is what it's all about And then you know, you have an interloper in there saying like, I was just bored on Saturday and this was $3. So here, yeah. Well, let's go, let's take some fucking LSD and go laugh. People are having some fun.

Shoplifters, no excuse. That will piss me off for days. It's not my stuff, but I respect this shop and the hard work My mistress puts into each and every doll. You got to get yourself a loss prevention officer I mean a simple simple you give them a Quota for callers and boom it'll be it'll be cleaned up. No time loss prevention night of no time. Lost prevention night. A loss prevention warrior. I would kind of adds to it like doing the Disney World thing of having like the stormtroopers there but it's like nights that

are like wandering the but they're actually actually do work there. You know, it's kind of you have costume security like it is some Yeah, I saw somebody asking do security guards dress up and like half of them are costumed and half of them aren't you know? And I think the ones that are costumer are probably volunteering which is wild because it costs like $55 to get into these things per per ticket. So Yeah, it's yeah, I mean, yeah, you got a you got a pale I mean I was gonna say you got to pay Kristoff the Ins insulter But no he that's additional and he negotiates on stage, which is so I don't I don't like that

I have a have the bucket up front and have somebody come and put it in there and then you need to train yourself to See what a $10 bill looks like from the stage. Don't go like don't be an auctioneer up there with that Just so I don't I don't like I know there's something about really seems weird like literally I like auctioning off comedy like it just it seems surreal to even watch somebody doing this you know we know as as actual but it's like you still have to be like let's be slick about like you gotta grease the skids you got to make it approachable for someone to want to do this yeah waddle doodle smart ass says well loud misbehaving drunks and loud misbehaving children are approachable for someone to want to do this. Yeah, waddle doodle.

Sardos says, well, loud misbehaving drunks and loud misbehaving children are annoying anywhere. And you find them not just fair drunks I can deal with, but heavens forbid you say anything about someone else's kids. It seems that's the only time that parents notice the little bastards. Then they go off on you for daring to tell them how to tell you how to raise them. I love when they asked me or my wife if we have any, we'll say no. And after seeing y'all, we don't want to. So, so this is so control your children control your child.

Listen, I'm a new father, I'm not quite at the age where I'm having to worry about controlling my children. But I can imagine both of you guys have experienced it. Sometimes it can be very difficult. Well, and they go sometimes you're doing your best and it's just not good enough. And oftentimes some fucking dipshit stranger who has not been dealing with all of the stuff all week and just sort of interjects thinking that they know anything about the situation can actually just exacerbate it and make it worse and is incredibly annoying. Well, he also says I don't really let that kind of stuff ruin my day though. Sounds like

you do. But I think sometimes I get more fair related stress outside the gates. Like this week I was banging my head against the law and a kilt forum trying to explain to some people that seem like they've never had a day of fun in their lives while we dress up and do what we do. Oh yeah. And unauthorized kilt checks. Now that would make me mad. I don't know what, like if people are walking up and looking at the guy's kilts, like up their kilts, but yeah, that's illegal brother. Yeah. Yeah. I was a woke. That's another woke thing where it's like, I can't even look up somebody's guilt anymore with those information.

I got a couple of reviews here. This is this one's from Amazon and this is for a chain mail. I can I can share this now. This is now this is a conflict of interest for you. Yeah, listen, you're going to be talking shit on it, of course, because your family's in the bit in the industry. But this could be my family and i have no idea you know what i mean like i don't know what their name is so this is the chain mail we got here it's a armored chain mail hood viking larp 16

it's 16 gauge chain mail for okay those wondering i mean that's something i know about here's the first review one star wondering wanderer says rusty and covered in oil. I get it's not bad already, but it had oil on it So bad, it was literally seeping through the cardboard It was shipped in I sent it back as soon as a as soon as the silver option I guess I don't know what that was. He he got cut off. But then this guy goes wait. It's not bad already I don't know what that was. He got cut off. But then this guy goes, wait, it's not bad already. No. Yeah. This other guy goes that this arrived disgusting with visible oil soaked through

the box. Okay. So there's sort of think they might have an oil issue on. Yeah. That was a brown color. I tried to wash it in my dishwasher and it looked rusted. There was no way I was going gonna let that sit on my face. Disgusting. I think you're not supposed to wash it in the dishwasher.

Not that that's necessary, not to blame the- Yeah, I don't think it's dishwasher safe. But who knows, who knows, you know? But yeah, if I got it and it had a bunch of brown oil all over it, I'd probably take it back. Well, you know what what I wouldn't do I wouldn't run up a big oily piece of metal through my dishwasher where all my dishes go you wouldn't you wouldn't want to maybe oil some of them up not even on it's not even on its own maybe just the resident yeah UT arm says super greasy and smells bad. Not even possible to wear.

So it also smells bad. OK, that's Adam. You know, it says do not buy this and another. I sent as a gift. Both arrived covered in oil. It was. Why are they oiling them? I have no idea why there's so much oil.

It's just so funny. Every one star review was like it's dripping with fucking oil. A little oil I think is probably fair to expect, right? A little bit, but soaking through the... there should be like an inner... They should be wrapped in a plastic and then maybe in a box from there, right? But I imagine because of the weird way, it's like it's chain, it's metal, but it has to also be like forming around you. So you're going to need them to be it to be oiled up a little bit or the chain, the links or whatever that they need to be greased.

Yeah, a little bit of something. But but yeah, it sounds like maybe they went a little overboard here. Yeah, my parents asked my sister and see if you got to oil it up. That's a good yeah. You ask her, why don't you? maybe that's a nice way for you guys, a little olive branch and all of a sudden,

maybe you guys are going, you're meeting up and hanging out next thing you know, just send her a message, say, hey, I had a question about the oil on chain mail. You want to know what, when our relationship went bad? Yes. Only, only, only if you're okay saying it, because as a reminder, you don't know how to edit the show. So you know that it's going to be

the show. She, she caught us huffing gas under the deck. My parents, wait a second. It just got bad. It's just like, I don't trust you. I can't be around you. Wait, wait. So, but you understand now that the tough and gas is very bad. And I agree that huffing gas isn't good, but you don't have to snitch. But she was concerned with you and she didn't know how to deal with it herself at the time. But she was concerned that this thing that is known to be one of the worst things you can do as a person. Is there a way to pull up the subreddit now for the episode when it comes out? I want to have it going. Well, you don't want to go on there. They're, they're, um, they don't, they, the people on the subreddit, they got all kind of issues. They don't even know what, what they're mad at. Wait, so this is, okay, this was in the last five years you kind of...

No, no, no, no. This happened a long time ago, but that's when he knew that they would never be closed when she quit. Also we got to pick our lunches during the summer. My parents would go buy the stuff and she was always picking stuff like tuna melts and macaroni and cheese with peas and tuna. And I'm in Vienna being a little bit funny here because there's

a comedy podcast and I think it's appreciated. The people listening appreciate that. But comedy is therapy too, isn't it? Yeah. Yeah, it can be. And but I just I wonder if maybe you should let those things go. Maybe it happened to you years ago, but it's your sister, right? It's like this is your full sister stepsister.

But yeah, I mean, it's fine. Neither one of us are hurting to talk to each other. Yeah. OK, OK. Now, here's a review of the New York. Why don't you start huffing gas again? No, I don't want to do that, baby. OK, it just feels like one. I don't know. It feels like maybe the thing or the gas thing.

Right. Yeah. Why give them both up? What is it? Yeah, you made your choice and you didn't stick with it. Should I get off the pod? I don't know. You got nothing. You made your choice and then you didn't stick with it. You should have get off the pod. I don't know. You got nothing. This person says, yikes. If you enjoy waiting in line a lot, go. If not, stay home. Just to get it.

There's just one guy who's just like, well, I'm heading over there. You know, he's just to get in the parking lot takes huge patience. It's a cute concept, but they let in way too many people. What is this for? Sorry, remind me. This is from TripAdvisor for the New York Renaissance. That makes sense. Do you know what I mean? New York, everything is over. There's so many

fucking people there. Yeah. Also, wouldn't you be happy like the thing you're going to has some support? You're like, oh, this is cool Like there now but to a level Jesse, you know what? I mean, there's a level because it does get annoying if you like, you know There's like that place that you like going to for a burger or whatever and then it's like oh, it's sweet that they're doing Well, but then all of a sudden it's like you got to wait for an hour and five minutes

I don't I don't I don't have that issue. It's very weird I the rare times I've gone to, you can do this all the time. Chris, you go to the movie all the time, maybe less nowadays. Hey, sorry. I just want to say this. I just got to go ahead. Ariel said, you know what? I think we're about seven weeks. It's going to be longer than that when this episode comes up. But she said, you know, I think you can go to a movie. And so I've gotten to go ahead to go to a movie. I'm going to be going back soon. Sorry. Let's go. No, I'm happy. You know, you talk to go to a movie. I'm gonna be going back soon. Sorry. Let's go No, I'm happy

You know you talk about going to the movie and like you will little you will legitimately go to the movie and there will be people Seated on either side of you in the movie theater, right? Like you're just in the row and there's like a guy here There's like a lady over here. Yeah, that's fucking insane to me. Like you have no idea how crazy that is to me That will buddy. I've been to a movie before where the entire movie theater was full, you know, like the entire theater, except for the front two rows were full. And oftentimes if I go see like an IMAX movie or whatever, the whole IMAX theater will be full. Yeah.

That wouldn't change me as a person. Yeah. And, and Vancouver is like not a big, big city. You know what I mean? But like, I definitely, I have a younger brother who I do talk to. Okay, so when you were huffing gas, he was like, he came by and gave you the thumbs up and then went to a room.

Well, he was wild. He was a wild party. He's a musician and stuff. He great, great guy. Step brother as well, actually. The gas guy? You have gas? He, I mean, I don't-

Is he a gas guy? I don't know. Who did the gas guy sing? You have gas? He, I mean, I guess guy. Did you guys see? He I don't think he did definitely did some, you know, he was a music guy, played in bands and stuff and did like electronic music. So I think he dabbled with some drugs, but I don't know. The gas wasn't huge around these parts. Gas wasn't the big go to for, you know, we definitely. You might have called it.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Maybe you're, no, we don't call it petrol. That's in the UK, Australia and stuff. But yeah, I was just gonna say, I go visit him. He lives in like a rural area called Powell River. If you wanna look it up, but I go there and just the space that you have to do things. And like you say, you go to restaurants,

that's never busy, the tables are spread out. It definitely, whenever I do that, I'm like, I wanna be in a place like this. It would be happier. It is kind of annoying. You go to a place, people are right on top of you all the time. I don't mind that.

This person says many of the more- Yeah, you're one of the guys, but you're the guy who's on top of you. Yeah, you don't mind random people being on and also you're the guy who you literally don't. Yeah, you don't remind my random people being on top of you all the time. I mean, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, But the magic on a show with our scene do pen was infuriating If he tries to take anything from you do not let him Okay Fear that didn't make it reappear Arsene took my shoe and I let him because I didn't expect him to do what he did next Arsene proceeded to throw my shoe behind the stage and into the dirt

His assistant retrieved my shoe and gave it to our scene to give back to me our scene then proceeded to throw the shoe again On the Sun over the audience When the show ended I had to retrieve my shoe myself with a pole that someone not someone from the show But some random good Samaritan found for me to use no one from the show helped to get my shoe myself with a pole that someone not someone from the show but some random good Samaritan found for me to use no one from the show helped to get my shoe back nor did he apologize. You start this guy gave the show two stars. No, not the show I think gave the whole experience two stars, right? Because he

liked all the other they liked all the other stuff. The falconry and all that stuff was great. But just the idea of doing a review of a magic show, like I just want to be clear. If the magician asks you to give him something, do not give him something. So like terrifying and ominous. I just love that, man.

I love that review. This guy, two stars on unorganized mess. He goes, visited this festival with my four year old and boy, what a mistake. This place is a giant cash only money trap. Everything in this entire place costs money after money for absolutely nothing. The actors walking around seem either drunk or high and say very vulgar, inappropriate things around children. This is a giant role play festival for adults who on any other time of the year probably never leave their home. I really felt sorry for some of

these people. Do yourself and your family a huge favor and skip this one. That is so funny to act like you're above it when you were there. You paid for it. You sought it out and went and you're like, Oh, look at these fucking nerds. Listen, I understand that. And I do understand a little bit of that thing where you go to an event and you pay money and then you get inside and it's like, Oh, now it costs eight more dollars to go in this area. Or, you know, just for this cost this amount. And it's like, God, now you've got me stuck in here. And if I want to have a halfway decent time, it's going to cost five times more than I thought I was going to spend.

That is annoying. But everything is a money grab that costs money. If you're going to go to something like this, you have to understand, really can't expect that it is a sale. Wait a minute. And it is a it is a fair like it is a fair, not the cutesy old timey way, but in like the modern way of thinking too, right? Where you get the ticket, there's tickets for the rides, then there's the concessions.

Did you think the $20 entry fee that you got $5 off with because you brought a Pepsi can in to redeem? Do you think that covered your funnel cake too? Like, I mean, I did it. Well, I didn't think so, but I was hopeful. That was your first mistake. A bit disappointing. We went with three couples who had children from 11 down to five years old.

The kids weren't too happy either. The website states that there are rides after all, it's a fair, which, by the way, you can't expect rides at the Renaissance. They say after all, it's a fair. Yeah, I know. I you said rides early, but yeah, no. When I think of Renaissance fair, I don't think of rides. No, I think of experiences, though.

Definitely. Yeah, we found three rides. They were a barrel, a camel. And I can't remember the last one. I don't know. No explanation of what any of that is. Hamel ride. I don't know.

What's a barrel? Camel ride sounds like something Brian would be offering. I want to his little forums. Oh, yeah. Yeah. I had our camel rides at the Quinby hose. Bring your own towels.

OK, well, they home like you stomp in there somehow. Right. I don't know, buddy. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know how your fucking six brain works. How you come up with this stuff. This next line is the most I've ever identified with a reviewer. We all wanted to leave after a half hour. Yeah. I'm like that everywhere. The employees

are calling out for you as you walk by to buy them to basically beg you to buy anything possible. I told my husband, I think this is more of a drink fest for adults than a fair for children, a big waste of time and money. If you notice, or I shouldn't say didn't notice they no longer advertise on TV anymore. That should have been my first hint. I, that one, I don't know if that follows. I also don't understand the conception that this would be for kids. I don't think I've ever thought that. I think people think that

if there's costumes, it's for kids and that should change now because I live by the convention center and I go through it all the time. And when these cosplay people are here, it's definitely not for kids. You know, they're all, what do you mean by that? Like titties are hanging out. Who's some of the titties that you've seen hanging out there? Like what's the, I don't know any of the characters because, uh, they're all anime people and stuff when I walked through, but there's like super here. There's like a wonder woman with her titties out and stuff like that. It just, I mean, it's just not a thing. I don't think that like any, I mean, I guess there's probably like kids cosplay things or kids friendly, but I don't think you can expect a place with cosplay to be child friendly. I don't think if, if my parents probably could have expected that because it doesn't wear

costumes back then. Like, how does she know they don't advertise on TV anymore? Like, how much TV does she watch that she knows? Is it they don't advertise on TV anymore? So they obviously don't have money. Yeah, the quality is dropped or whatever. There's, you know, it's like less legitimate now, I guess, or something. Well, our final review comes from Plevin for the Ohio Thing and he goes did not open the gates till 45 minutes late So they open the gates 45 minutes like what is something to be mad at? I'm not saying

You know is again we don't these these are unreliable near unreliable that these are very proven liars in a lot of Unreliable. These are very proven liars in a lot of circumstances. You cannot trust these people. They obviously want to make themselves look as good as possible in these scenarios. They say the fair is open 420 minutes in the day. When the gate opens 40 minutes, I lost 10% of my fair time. Wait, hang on a second. Did he say 45 to start and now it's down to 40? No, it's down to 40 down to that makes the math easier. But so it's already kind of, you know what I mean? Like we're kind of pushing it. Yeah. Kind of unsure about the time exactly. It leads me to believe it was probably closer to 30, 25,

maybe even, you know? Yeah. Yeah. Do you think they offered us a 10% refund or state the fair was extending its time? No, I don't. I don't think so. Do I think you stayed the entire time the fair was open? No, I do not. I do not think you did. Oh, there's no harm, no foul. I'm with you in that. He probably seems like a guy that would sort of stay the whole time. I guess, no, no. Oh, yeah. Maybe he waited around in order to get a refund. But I think Jesse's correct in that he didn't. It's not like he got there. And he's like, wasn't able to do all the things he needed to do being

open late. He was just a little bit annoyed by it. But it's like, yeah, sometimes, you know, shows and stuff, maybe not fairs, but shows sometimes they just they happen later. You just wait sometimes. You know we learned that with Steve Aoki. Yeah, sometimes one nice thing about that is you had the buffet. Yeah, and they don't have cake, so that's a they didn't throw the cake at the end.

He didn't do the cake throwing. I don't know if you know Steve Aoki, but he throws a cake or something. He does the audience but sometimes See something of a of an epo baby, isn't he if I'm not mistaken? Yes, his parents are rich. I believe I believe yeah, he's Don't am I wrong? Don't they own a big restaurant chain? I Thought his dad restaurants Oh Benny Hanna I mean, I know right I whose whose dad owns Benny Hanna. That's him, isn't it? Rocky Aoki. Yep. Yep. Japanese cuisine restaurant chain. Benny Hanna and his, um, his father. His grandfather was a wrestler.

wrestler. No, yeah, I swear to God I'm looking at he is the Japanese and the third child of Rocky Aoka. His father was a former wrestler, so I think his father Rocky Rocky Aoki. Sorry is was a wrestler. This didn't come up during your research for the. Aoki guys episode. Well, we just did DJ guys and we were more focused on the fact that the beans were very cheap at the Steve Aoki Beans it's a problem. They're cold and cold beans. Yeah. Yeah, you don't want cold cheap beans So he was a powerboat racer to Wow Family this guy's sick aoke partially. Oh, he funded a crew.

I think he funded this. Oh, no, he did do the power boating. God, I'd love to power boat. That would be something for me. I gotta make enough money to get a boat. Well, that is Renaissance Fair guys, which I'm going to do more searching to find out. You know, know, it's, is the same as the Jeep guys episode where everybody kept telling me these guys are like perverts and I couldn't find people like, Oh, you know, I know about it.

And I'm like, that doesn't help because I have to find people. I have to find something. I can't line as their sex guy. I like a public, but you have to find a public Journalism. Yeah, you can't take this it can't find it. I'm gonna have to go with them Well, I don't know if I can bring a microphone recording Rick Salter Sort of late just the fact that he just went straight to that that sort of like leads me one more chance

Give him one more chance Brian pull him up one more time and see if straight to that. That sort of like leads me to one more chance. Give him one more chance, Brian. Pull him up one more time and see if he does something that's not Cox Cox. Yeah, let's hear him. Let's hear him doing another because we've only heard one. We've only heard one. Maybe that was just we just have maybe who knows? Listen, maybe she really looked like she loved cock and we couldn't see her. You know, maybe it was a completely appropriate roast and it wasn't a misogynistic and inappropriate. Okay. I got to move forward a bit. Here we go.

She was wearing a hat that said, I suck cock and I love cock. Cut that out. Okay. Don't cut that out, okay? For 20, oh, insult your friend! Okay, here we go. Alright, I moved it forward a bit more. Come on, come on, Kristoff. She's holding her cup nervously, twisting her hands to her horns.

Bottomless, bottomless, we know the wh. We know the horns. Horns cost money. Here we go. Here we go. Here we go. Okay. What Dana offers is free. And even at that price, some people think she's overcharging. Really? Okay. Where's my money?

In fact... Oh, God. No, no. She needs to find some kind of a promotional plan to help her move that product by as a County jail. In fact, you've got to be more careful about who you let sleep with you. If you let one more convict inside you, you're going to qualify as a County jail. Let's get past it. Come on, Dana. Come on. Dana's got her. We got the 15 bucks on Dana's got her we got the 15 bucks on Dana That's all 15, but like so I want to hear what it's like for a hundred dollars You know is he like I'm gonna kill your parents

Say for a hundred Wait a minute here. We got one here. We got another video insults by Christoph part one Don't like the way this is starting okay so uh message just came on the screen that said back it up so we can read this right um so there's just it's black screen and white writing uh on the screen as the video starts all right um and it says in, Florida began sentencing juveniles to adult prisons. How is that? How could that possibly be relevant?

Maybe the joke is based on it. You guys don't know yet. Okay. And then it said wrong. In December, 1975, a 15 year old robbed a bank in July, 1977. Wait, I couldn't read that. It went way too fast. In December 1975, a 15-year-old robbed a bank in July 1977. Wait, I couldn't read that. It went way too fast.

When I say that as a damn shame, I mean you don't know how sad you'd make me. You badly infected puss-weeping sheep penis. If I had got my boot and tracked a tick against the wall, the stain will be more appetizing than you. You don't know how sad you've made me, my god, there's nothing I can do to beat you. You are a trash and unpopular turd. You are a trash and unpopular turd. So, you know, the ho stuff is actually better. Yeah. Go back to calling calling him

slot. That's actually that's a lot funnier. I think I wonder if we can find okay Brian some of it. I will. We don't Brian's now just going through YouTube looking for the insult her clip. I'm seeing videos so we can see if there are whoa. You want to see a new one like his own channel. Welcome to the stream. Christoph will be talking about you Sunday. That's him. That's him. Oh, he's older now. Can we just click quickly and just see what he worried about what he's going to say but. Oh, oh, this is a to see what he's gonna say, but.

Oh. Oh, this is a stream. I think he's streaming. Oh yeah, he's he's a streamer. Uhm? Well, and stream OK, I don't know what it's doing. Brian style beginning to the stream. Does he insult people on stream? I would imagine that's probably his gig, right? That's what 2020 is. That's a lot better of a setup, I think. Yeah, his YouTube channel is just called The Insulter.

He has one video. Oh, he's probably on Cameo, right? Oh yeah, this is basically what he's doing here. Let's see. Hello, heart disease. Okay, thanks so much everybody. Thanks for listening. Jesse, where can people find you? Oh boy. Well, hey, thanks for having me back. Go off Kings is the Twitch channel and the

YKS. Your Kickstarter sucks. Is the podcast. Please go. Two of the best things you're keeping out. YKS with Jesse and Mike, you guys, you know, both of them and love both of them. So if you somehow listen to this and have not gone and listen to like, yes, genuinely go listen to it, unless you're on the sub Reddit, don't I don't need. Yeah, we don't need it. Negative. We don't need red. No, there's really nice.

I want to be clear about whatever's going on on that. No, last time I checked, which was granted a long time ago to be clear tonight about whatever's going on on that subreddit. No, most people, last time I checked, which was granted a long time ago, you know, but- Oh, it's gone to hell in a hand basket. It was a lot of positivity and a lot of nice people saying nice things, truly, on the subreddit, yeah. We'll see y'all next week.

Goodbye. Bye.