Guys: With Bryan Quinby - Guys: Episode 75 - Stand Up Comedy Guys with Dan Licata
Episode Date: July 9, 2024Oh my goosh! we found a new guy! He trained Whoopi and one of the hosts of Your Mom's Home. We learned how to deal with hecklers and a loud room and we talk a bit about our experiences performing at... various levels of the stand up scene. Dan Licata is at https://x.com/danlicatasucks and https://www.instagram.com/danlicatasucks/?hl=en and his new special For The Boys is right here. As always There is much more Chris at twitter.com/thecjs and of course https://www.patreon.com/notevenashow And for more Guys content, streams and SHOCKTOBER: a deep dive into shock jocks you can click patreon.com/murderxbryan twitter.com/murderxbryan and  https://bsky.app/profile/murderxbryan.bsky.social  Guys has a Post Office Box now! PO Box 10769 Columbus Ohio 43201-
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Welcome to Guys, a podcast about guys. I am your host and comedian, Brian Quinby. And with me is my modern day
court jester, Chris James.
That was usually even salt me.
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Well, it's kind of I see that because if a guy said I'm a modern
day court jester, I would that I would think that's very dorky.
Yeah, that's really kind of lame.
And also, by the way, the way you said,
I'm your host and comedian, that didn't sound good.
And you actually sound-
I thought that because I say comedian magician
on my little thing, because as we all know,
let's get our guest on here.
We have stand up comedian Dan Licata.
Hey, Dan, how's it going, boys?
Check this out, Dan.
You see it?
No, you can't.
You literally can't see.
I apologize for this, Dan.
I'm sorry about this.
This is now you can kind of see it because he's blocking it with the light with his thought. It's a light up thumb that he got along. Oh, okay. I'm a comedian slash
magician. I'm mostly magician. That's pretty cool. There is a lot of you know, Dan, you
know this doing there's a lot there is a lot of crossover. You'll do shows where there's
like magicians on there, then they're trying to, you know, get their comedy chops up or whatever, for sure.
I like to keep those two camps as separate as humanly possible. But I, I respect, I respect
anyone that tries to do something different in this business. So yeah, totally.
There is a guy there. I, we've talked about it on here. We even read some reviews for
it on the bonus content. There's a, they're, they're completely separated in my city. There's open mics and
there's comedians and then there's a just for magic place that you can go to that like 90 people fit
in there. It's been open for several years and I still can't figure out how. Is it open? There's
open mic magic there you're saying. There is. I should go to that. I mean, I should go to an open mic magic show.
To me, there's a lot of appeal to an open mic magic show.
A lot of appeal to it.
I can't explain exactly why,
but I feel like it might be one of the better shows
that you'd be able to watch in 2024.
I'll go perform on one.
Just go up there and do my thumb.
Yeah, Dan was so genuinely confused as all the guests are
because we brought up a couple of times.
Before when it wasn't the summertime,
Brian could do that trick and it would,
you could at least see the light up thumb.
It's a good trick.
It's not a light up, it's my thumb.
With the summertime light, the sun coming in his window,
it just washes it out completely and you can't see it.
Yeah. Also, I don't know what size computer monitor you guys
got. But just Brian, your your entire frame. It's probably one
inch. So it's really squinting and like, I don't know what I'm
supposed to do. I got a gigantic I'm on I'm on a big screen. I'm
doing it on like, you can imagine a big screen, but like
a one of those big ones that has the big back on it
as well, like old school.
So I'm sort of, I'm casting onto that.
So I can see clearly.
Well, we have, I have a screen share up
because what we're gonna do is what they call
in the business, a runner.
What's going on here?
Who is this that we're watching a video of?
And what, when you say-
It's gonna be a runner through the whole-
Oh, I see.
I see.
A runner.
They say that in comedy.
Oh, it's a runner.
I gotcha.
So I'm doing good.
I just want to clarify.
I don't really talk about it.
There's contractual stuff and I'm not really allowed to talk about it that much, but I
used to do a little bit of stand up.
And I'm curious, is this stand up guys?
Are we talking about stand up?
Are we going to talk about people?
Because there are fans of stand up.
There are like stand up comedy guys who are like fans of stand up.
I know I don't put out YouTube stuff.
I mean, Dan, we'll talk about it at the end.
Dan just put out a YouTube special, hilarious special.
You would get comments on there. I'm sure my friend Gavin, who we had on Jam Band, guys,
he just put on how to clip on YouTube. And his was not his comedy channel. It was like,
don't tell comedy or something like that. And so he got like-
I know the anti dry bar comedy. Yeah. Okay. And he so he got like just random comments.
Do you know what I mean?
Like just and there's some fucking wild like, oh, I see.
You're pretending to be a little bit stupider than now is like enjoy
spending time with your target audience, you know, and like really.
We're not talking about those guys.
Can I tell you the sweet spot for this episode?
Okay.
Was to me guy that is mostly 90% an enormous stand up comedy fan, but it's either about
to do an open mic or is doing open mics.
That was the perfect guy for me to find.
And then maybe we'll have some more like stand up like bigger
or people commenting on it critics of it people that have
gone and seen it.
We have a lot of stuff this time.
We have reviews and and you know rich rich.
I mean, it's a rich vein to find stuff about stand-up comedy
online way too much of it.
Well guys, I know you guys have both dealt with this.
Me, not necessarily, but sometimes hecklers
show up to your show.
Oh, forget about it.
It's the worst.
Yeah, worse than single guys.
Scum of the earth, yeah, absolutely.
They usually are single guys.
They tend to be single guys.
They're causing a lot of trouble at the show.
That is not what I learned.
No, exactly.
I don't want to be. I don't want to be at risk of coming off as not being
necessarily woke here.
It does tend to, in my experience,
it generally was a drunk women who were doing it.
It wasn't exclusively, but that was the majority of it.
Usually, drunk Caucasian women is what I found
were the majority of hecklers.
I would agree in my personal experience.
Personal experience.
I would agree.
That's the whole Reddit is like,
well, if you're dealing with a heckler,
you're probably dealing with a woman.
And it's like, okay, so this guy,
BigHunkDaddy on r slash standup says,
meanest shit you've ever said to a heckler. Oh, this could be because I've heard some stuff, you know
Sometimes people will get real just offside with it, you know, not even funny
Yeah, he goes just what the title says folks
I want to hear the darkest insult humor you've pulled on a piece of shit in the crowd for whatever
some shit in the crowd for whatever.
Making sure that the people understand like I am hostile towards them. Like I want to hear like I, you cannot say anything here that I will not take
your side on like extra props for going so hard.
People in the audience actually felt bad for laughing and a proper story
behind what led up to the, how would you know if they felt bad for laughing?
How would you know?
That would have to be something you decided.
I guess you would in order to pull this off.
I think you'd have to know the person personally.
You'd have to be able to speak to them afterwards, you know,
to get there like which they do sometimes have comment cards.
I remember the comedy club that I worked at before.
Rest in peace to the comedy mix in Vancouver.
That they used to have comment cards and they were very valuable.
Who would you like to see?
Fucking, you know, tenacious D.
Maybe they would.
I mean, they're just like every person was just like,
like saying shit that just not a single helpful product other I don't think.
Well, Ratsosloman said at a corporate Christmas party,
a couple hundred in the audience, one table near the back,
a couple of guys and girls just kept talking loudly during my set
and the host set before me.
Me. Hey, that table in the back.
Are you guys married?
Dude, no. Me. I figured if you had a wife, she'd tell you to shut the fuck up. Hey that table in the back. Are you guys married dude? No me
I figured if you had a wife she'd tell you to shut the fuck up
Apparently everyone else was sick of them too because a short applause break ensued. Oh shit. That's that's how you know, you've right. I mean
You're kind of iffy about that, right Dan you make that comment and you're kind of like how's this gonna go over?
But then they then the comedians best friend the applause. When they're on when the crowd is on your side,
that's when that's when it gets dangerous though, because then you're like, okay, they're on my side,
maybe I'll go a little maybe I'll go a little farther and say, hey, you probably probably don't
have a wife because you don't have a dick and you need a dick to have a wife. Am I right? And then everyone goes, whoa,
as we recently learned on the stream, you've probably got three balls.
Oh yeah. That's a great insult.
You probably got three balls. It was, that was from a Renaissance fair.
And it's all there like a famous insulter.
He said that to somebody and he was, we were like, that's okay.
This guy goes, that's a good one.
If they were married, you could have said something like you're both
perfect for each other or too annoying to marry someone else riff.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
You could say that.
Well, here's another riff by the guy.
He goes, I'm guessing your marriage counselor doesn't get a word in edge wise.
Oh, I like that.
Bringing in an imagine.
Yeah, bringing in an imaginary person into the into the heckler roast is always good.
That's a great.
That is really a convoluted.
Just bring in extra storylines and just like confuse everybody.
This next thirsty hank says
Oh, yeah, no, no, you're good.
Oh, no, it's great world building. That's what you want
to do.
That the comedian extended universe. Yeah. Bring in because
this guy goes thirsty.
Hank says, quote, You must have heckled your hairdresser too.
But you but you don't know what if they had great hair?
You don't see them.
Hey, you don't know.
Do you know what I mean?
You're just saying that.
That's not a catch.
All that only works for somebody with a bad with noticeably bad hair.
And then he gets one reply to that and it goes, Savvy.
I got Chris
get water out of my.
Somebody's.
That is the least.
Although that one has 20 up votes.
I thought I...
Where is this?
Where is this?
This is on Reddit, rsanda?
Yeah, these guys are good.
This person says, I accidentally called an audience member a fuckwit once while I was
MC.
The audience laughed though, so all good fuck wit
that has to be a british comic i feel like it might be sometimes to get a little like
but what do you mean you accidentally maybe they meant to say i trying to like let's go to say
something that sounds like it you know a nitwitwit or whatever. But yeah, I mean, listen, as long as the audience is on board,
we all know that that's the end of the day.
That is it's a democracy on stage and the votes are the laughs.
And so if you get those.
I want to make a comment also about this,
the person that said I called an audience member a fuckwit.
Their little avatar is a pineapple. So I have to let people know that they might be in a lifestyle. said I called an audience member a fuck with their little avatars of pineapples.
So I have to let people know that they might be in a lifestyle.
And we don't have to get into that.
We don't have to, we don't have to talk about lifestyle related things
in every single episode.
Yeah, we go.
Just move on.
Ninja lip says, here's his, here's an angel.
How old are you?
Uh, heckler I'm 22. Sweet. I wish I had a time machine
so I could go back 23 years and give your parents the money for an abortion.
Oh buddy, what are you asking of his age? Yeah, Joe unnecessary.
Oh, he says you can just say I wish I could add a time machine so I could
go back to before you're bored. No, no, no, no. You got to say the number of years you
would have to go back. I wish I had a time machine to go back nine months before your
birthday and then have your parents get an abortion. Big hunk daddy says he's the LP he goes I have a
recurring fantasy of bringing up a heckler's mother for to them
for them to say my mother is dead back to me so I can reply
Ah, I see the guilt and shame of birthing you finally caught up
to her.
you finally caught up to her. Whoa, whoa, whoa.
You have a...
That guy is a seriously strange individual.
Like a legitimate psychopath.
I have a recurring fantasy about mocking somebody's
dead mother.
Yeah.
And saying that it was your fault,
probably that she's dead. Yeah. I mean, that doesn't was your fault, probably that you.
Yeah. I mean, that doesn't go too far at all.
We can agree that that's going to shut a heckler up.
Look, if you're going to heckle, you're opening your shit up to a world of pain like that.
Don't sit in the front row then if you don't want to deal with that type of shit.
If you don't want to be blamed for your mother's suicide, don't sit in the front row then if you don't want to deal with that type of shit. If you don't want to be blamed for your mother's suicide, don't sit in the front row.
Any trauma that you experienced in your life is fair game.
The second step into my world.
I'm trying to make you cry.
Yeah.
I'm trying to make this awful for everybody in the room.
I'm trying to make you cry.
And if you ain't crying from laughter,
I'm gonna make you cry thinking about your dead mom.
Okay?
Yeah.
This guy, Mark Merrick says,
I did a show once where Eric,
Mark,
Mark,
Merrick Bathory.
Sorry.
Merrick Bathory says,
Okay.
I did a show once where two drunk women 25 ish
We're heckling so much as being loud disruptive and answering the comedians hypothetical questions sounds drunk sound
They sound drunk, you know a little boisterous. We've all yeah that does happen
That's those are harder to deal with honestly
Yeah, because like the other people you just take head-on, but it's just like as comedians always say it's like hey
They're enjoying the show but but they're just, did
they're also disrupting it?
The nightmare of the comic, you know, keep you up in a cold sweat on the road.
You know, it is, it is.
So this guy goes, um, after several other comedians went up and asked them to stop.
I decided to throw out my set and try some crowd work.
Oh, good call.
I started with them, ask a few basic questions, told them they were a couple of attractive
young women, then that they were exactly why men watch porn with the volume off.
These are good.
These are good.
What the hell?
That's that's that's like basically like so his insult is just like I am so fucking horny for you.
I'm gonna angrily jerk off to you later.
I am looking at you and I just feel sexual thoughts.
This does, man, I hate that I really hate to admit that this is giving me the slightest bit of deja vu.
The one time I was doing a show and these two women were heckling all of the comics, but yeah, it was sort of polite heckling. And then I was trying to tell them to shut up. And then I was
doing crowd work on them. They said they were teachers. And I was like, okay, what school do
you teach at? They said PS2. I'm like, Oh, I fucking love PS two, I used to
play Tony Hawk on there, whatever, it's going fine. But
then something something shifted where they were like,
wouldn't stop talking. And I was just like, Well, you guys are
clearly the shittiest teachers on planet Earth. Your students
clearly hate you, they definitely don't respect you.
And they started throwing pretzels at me.
I was trying to catch the pretzels in my mouth.
Maybe I went a little too far.
Where was this?
Where did this gig happen?
Oh my gosh.
It was at the one of the worst to call it a venue.
Was it a, it wasn't a corporate gig.
That was a comedy club.
Oh no.
It was just a bar that could comfortably fit seven people but
Shouldn't have had a comedy show going on to be fair that Dan
That's something that I because I've barely done
I've like done six months of open mics and like that one thing I learned through doing that
Was that like a lot of open mics are just kind of assaulting
people with comedy like people who went to the bar after work to sit down and
have a few drinks and they get there and there's a comedy show happening like
that's mostly what you're doing and then these hecklers are like you're sitting
there trying to talk to your friends from work? I would say this, like, you can do whatever you want. You know what I mean?
It's fine. You can talk, you can turn away, but you just say you might get caught in
the crosshairs of a mentally unwell person without the charisma required to
pull off, you know, that type of insult comedy.
You know, who knows?
This person said, I had a whole progressive set of heckler
lines threatening to follow them home and kick the blocks out
from under their house.
They got darker and darker as I went on.
My borderline psycho persona helped.
But the meanest turned out to be my take on one of the oldest
lines in the book.
Do I come to your job and shove the donkey off you?
Only time I made an audience member cry.
She was with a work party and I still kind of feel bad about it.
So what is the.
Well, I think we're talking donkey show here.
Yeah.
But like, so that's that's a variation on that.
Do I come to you?
I don't come to your job and knock the dick out of your mouth.
It's more edgy though, because it's a, it's a donkey.
Remember that story I told on the wrong.
I don't know if it is even to be honest, I think it's putting the donkey into it makes
it more like comical and sort of cartoonish in my mind.
I think it takes a donkey that in reality, but I think in the joke, it's just more vulgar
to say slap the dick out of your mouth
I think that is more vulgar. Yeah. Here's one Brian McComedy says
I was on his phone looking at Facebook videos when I asked him about it mid-set. He said it's funnier than you
That's the first thing I've heard so far that is like legitimately cutting and
And it's from an audience That is that's the first thing I've heard so far that is like legitimately cutting and like
and it's from an audience. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And he goes, I turned to the audience and just said, I like a guy who likes to doodle on his arms because his whole arm was tattooed.
And it was the first thing that come to mind to say I clearly struck a nerve because he just got
up and left. I mean, I think at that point, this is this is in reality.
What happened? He's like, this fucking shit sucks.
Like he's getting on his phone and he's like looking at something.
He's like trying to plan where he's going to go or whatever.
And he's like texting his friends.
He's like, hey, what's going on, man?
And he's like, why are you on Facebook?
It's fucking funnier than you, dude.
Like he was just a normal guy.
He's like, this shit fucking sucks.
And then he's like, oh, yeah, the doodles on your arm.
And the guy's like, are you fucking kidding me?
I can't even put the fucking arm on.
And he got up and walked away.
And he told the story a bunch of times himself, you know?
And it was a much better story from his perspective, I bet.
What do you doodle on your arm while you slap the donkey's dick out of your ass?
Well, let's learn something else.
It was it was because it was the first thing I could think of. He's like acknowledging that, like, man, I know it wasn't the strongest.
Yeah, yeah, he is.
So here's a quote.
Well, here, let's start this.
We're going to take a look at how to build a comedy
Who's gonna tell us this this is Greg Dean stand-up comedy classes. He's a
We don't know like see I've heard of it I do
But I mean Dan you're like in the industry
More so than either of us and in the comedy industry you tour you tour stand-up
And you know you play comedy clubs and
things like that. So do you know Greg Dean?
You know, in my 13 years of doing this, I've never crossed paths with or heard of Greg
Dean. So I'm excited to see what he's all about.
So what you can get, if you search stand up comedy classes, you get Greg Dean and David Sedaris
master class. Well, David, I've heard of David Sedaris, his master class.
I didn't know he didn't get to end up.
He doesn't. But here we go.
This guy's electric.
Trust me.
Trust me.
Hey, they're aspiring comedians.
Welcome to.
Hang on. Hang on. Hang on. Hang on. This doesn't seem this doesn't seem.
This this guy is notably notably old,
so I would say that like maybe his understanding like
does he understand modern stand up?
It is a little bit different, I would say.
Maybe. Oh, he understands stand up, buddy.
Hey, don't you fucking worry.
Okay. This is the free seminar my level one workshops and classes okay they're available
in person in Santa Monica and on zoom. LA. Santa Monica.. I just hang on. So he's in Santa Monica.
He's in LA.
He's in the Los Angeles area.
He is Hollywood adjacent.
Yes.
Yes.
Yes.
Yes.
Yes.
So that's probably the very first thing you really need to know when you get into standup
comedy.
And there are a plethora of skills that you need to know in order to be able to just do that.
I don't think that's true.
They're really shocked by how much they actually have to learn.
No you don't.
No, no.
Hang on.
Sorry.
It takes a lot.
You gotta do courses.
No, it doesn't take anything.
I just want, I've said this before and I hope you don't take this as an insult, Dan.
As someone who's done stand up
I think it's very much one of the easiest things to accomplish
That's why you will see people who
Really struggle to accomplish anything else
They will manage to get up at open mics and you'll see them sort of maybe struggling in other areas
But they do manage to it's because you just can show up there and talk.
Yeah, they'll let anybody do it.
It's maybe it's maybe difficult to be good at it, but I would also argue that
I don't even think that's true. I just think you have to be funny.
Yeah. Well, let's this guy flubs more than me, too, by the way.
It's great. Here we go.
Because you're the writer and the performer and also your director, producer
and
Oh my gosh.
Did you ever think of it like that?
I'd go a step further. You're also, you know, in a lot of instances, your own
camera operator boom boom. You're also, you know, in a lot of instances, your own camera operator, boom, boom, like guy.
You're the, you're the, uh,
Video head.
Hair and makeup.
Yes. Let's think about it here.
Transport, transport.
You know, I think you're doing a lot of that.
Yeah, no.
I would say, I mean, you're not,
if you're getting to a level where you're, say,
doing a special, I would imagine you're not if you're getting to a level where you're, say, doing a special,
I would imagine you have a director, right?
Yes. So you'd have a director, you would have maybe a producer, you would have people who
would be doing some of that stuff. But he's talking about just as a comedian when you're
starting out.
Yes.
PR person, you're everything. So we'll prepare you for all of those things.
I wanted to go through them and show you all.
He doesn't seem to know what he was gonna say
before he started this video.
Is one of the things I really like about this.
All of the different things I teach,
cause not all stand up comedy teachers are like.
Some of them, many of them will put you up on the street.
Brian, Brian, did you hear that?
Uh, sorry, Dan, we just did an episode on Toastmasters and we
learned about the Toastmasters and that's a big no no to be
putting your arms and eyes.
This guy could probably stand to go to the Toastmasters.
He seems like someone who would have gone to the Toastmasters.
He would probably be really good at Toastmasters joke master. Not with all all those odds and ums. No. Yeah. Yeah. They let him know.
Even at a major club. And uh,
I personally think that's too soon because they don't really teach you
anything. That's what this is about.
So I can talk about what I actually am going to teach you to do.
This guy's good. All right. And I think you'll be a little shocked at how much we're covering
Tonight and the class itself will cover a lot more
So let's move right along. Okay
Congratulations, you do just
Turn your dreams into reality you'd be surprised how many people sign up for this free class and don't even show up for it.
We'll come back to you, Greg.
We got some stuff to read.
I'm going to sign up for this free class.
Not even bother to show up. I'm going to sign up for this free class. Not even bother to show up.
I'm going to sign up for the Zoom meeting.
Yeah, a lot of people who are just like,
oh yeah, that seems like a good idea.
And then the morning they're just like, wait a second, what the fuck?
Why would I talk to this old guy about stand up comedy?
I might do my laundry instead. Yeah, it's been piling up and like, yeah, I don't know.
I've never I've never seen this guy on any of the late night programs.
Can you can you he's is that a Hollywood walk of fame behind him?
No, I mean, it's it's a star.
I Hollywood star from the Walk of Fame.
I mean, is this guy is he like maybe an old did he used to be a legitimate stand-up?
You know what? I mean like in the Steve Allen days or something. I haven't been able to find him
Doing anything. Okay, so here
Well, I got some reviews too that I thought I thought we could look at for some famous comedians
Oh good. Is this on Ticketmaster?
No, I should have done Ticketmaster.
I did Rotten Tomatoes.
Oh, Rotten Tomatoes. That's funny as well.
You're saying reviews of people who have taken his class is.
No, no, no.
This is reviews of like a famous comedy special or whatever, like a DVD.
These are just audience reviews.
But yeah, Ticketmaster, this is one thing we learned on the show, Dan,
is that Ticketmaster has some really fantastic reviews people who are reviewing on ticket master are really fucking weird
Oh, yeah
Bill burr live at red rocks
Review when is it which which built which year is this from?
2022
He had the literal red rocks behind him.
Yeah, because it's a place called Red Rocks.
I like that.
I like that because it really drove it home for me.
I was a I like that kind of thing.
People are saying it was too on the nose.
I like it.
Is that that outdoor like venue in Denver or something?
Yeah, fish plays there a lot.
Fish plays there.
Which is the man we love.
If you're into jam band guys, if you're a jam band guy.
We're a couple of tarpers.
Well, no, we're not.
And one of us actually is.
And it's let's not get into it.
Bill Burr, live at Red Rocks, Mountain M gives it five stars.
And he says one of the best stand up shows I've ever watched.
Every joke hit and I came away a better person.
A better person. I don't think that that can happen.
I'm a Bill Verstead.
Maybe it can.
I guess I shouldn't doubt his journey or whatever, but I think
that it's like you're missing the point if that happens.
I feel like maybe this guy.
Well, maybe this guy was like really mean to his wife.
He was and he was really bad before.
So it was like he just needed like, yeah, if you're really bad,
I guess you could watch a Bill Burr special and it could make you better.
Well, Google G, though, has he disagrees?
He goes horrible.
I just deleted all his movies and
made my staff of over 160 do the same. He and his wife can go
to hell.
Deleted all of his movies and made his staff do the same. The
staff part I think is very strange.
If you got any bill burr, yeah, any Bill Burr staff memo on the company server, make
sure that's gone by the day.
Come in and the fucking the receptionist is watching F is in family or whatever.
Hey, hey, hey, hey, yeah. Come on. Get that off.
Paul B says Bill Burr is one of my favorite comics, but I didn't find a special hilarious or particularly clever
despite a couple moments of actual humorous insight.
It mostly came off sounding like so many aging comics sound
like they've kicked the keg.
He spends most of his time rehashing greatest hits jokes designed to play
to a fan base that chokes down as red meat like a T-Rex that was forced to fast for a month.
Ooh, that's a really, really brutal review for an older comic to read, you know?
That seems almost personal, like he might know Bill Burr and be trying to hurt his feelings,
you know?
Yeah, a real disdain for Bill Burr fans as well, not just...
Yeah, maybe everyone who... I saw Bill Burr fans as well. Not just.
Yeah, maybe everyone who I saw
Bill Burr, I've seen him.
I saw him in Vancouver
at the Vogue Theatre many
years ago.
I went and watched him.
The person, someone I knew got
had a ticket.
They worked at the venue and they
got a really good ticket.
But the crowd was so fucked.
The crowd was like so out of
control and they were heckling and just completely...
And they were his fans, you know, but they were just fucked.
And I was like, what? He must kind of hate this, performing to these kind of people.
Yeah.
And Dan, what were you?
I mean, just speaking, going back to the heckler takedowns we were talking about earlier,
I mean, Bill Burr has kind of got the most famous one when he just.
Oh, yeah. When he goes on that day. Philadelphia. Yeah. You guys love.
So you got a statue of Sylvester Stallone, you know, Rocky.
Yeah, that was a really famous.
And so I guess he probably does attract a lot of people who are like, come on, come on, on, Bill, do, do me, you know, like, get me now.
I would love it if the first thing Greg Dean teaches is just like, all right, so you're
probably going to get heckled. You're going to want to tell them to suck your dick.
I think that virus tour, that the, the Bill Burr standup thing, I think that led to a lot of these
takes down brutal heck, brutal take down of a heckler. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.
Cause they weren't really going on before that.
And then all of a sudden bill bird does it and people are like, I'm going to,
I'm going to fucking kill a guy.
Only I forgot that that old,
that heckler thing only happened because in part due to Greg Opie Hughes,
I know that's crazy to us.
Brian does a thing, Shocktober, and we like do all the shock talks and stuff. So we talk a lot about we follow Opie's current career.
Now we like, we, we, he's going, it's going well for him. He does a,
he does a live stream from this bar that he's a regular at, you know? And, uh,
and yeah, that's what he's up to mostly now, but yeah,
that's kind of crazy to think that something like this.
This was an ONA tour.
So like he has some responsibility for this, like huge changing moment
in standup comedy, for the worse.
Yeah. And I'll tell you one thing about Opie's modern career.
He'll teach you a lot about ticks.
So no fuck off, man.
Don't even make people people. I think people were really mad at us about playing that clip
We played it on the stream just they were mad because it's it was so boring and it made people so bored
They were like so mad about it
This guy goes what's to say if you like bill burr comedy, then you'll love this don't listen to the critics score
They hate it because it's not the opposite of woke
So it's gonna try to figure out what that is. Whoa
No, wait, if it's not not the opposite of woke
Focus on what the opposite of woke is woke
woke
Not the opposite of woke is woke
Pablo the opposite of woke is unwoke. So they're not the opposite of it is woke. Pablo, the opposite of woke is unwoke.
So then not the opposite of it is woke.
So they hate it because it's woke.
The critics, I think that I think that it's safe to say that person made an error.
They did too many negatives.
They were trying to be clever with it.
They should just say
they hate it because it's the opposite of woke.
That's what they meant.
What does Pablo have to say?
He goes, Bill knows comedy.
I'm sure this show offended someone, which is a good thing in comedy.
It's good.
If you're not ruining someone's day, you're really not doing it.
It's good to offend somebody.
I mean, I guess it's good.
I suppose it depends on the type of person you're talking about.
I think maybe they're trying to refer to like that really easily offended person.
And so if you're doing anything that's edgy, then you're doing something that's good.
But yeah, just the idea of like,
you offend someone that is good.
What's Greg up to?
Let's check on Greg Dean is.
Fear, fear.
Wait, wait. Whoa. It is fear. Fear.
Yeah, yeah. He seemed that I'll go back 10 seconds.
Here you go.
People sign up for this free class and don't even show up for it because fear.
Fear. Fear.
I understand stand-up comedies
terrifying yet
We have a lot of things to help you through that too and a big part of that is knowing what you're doing and feeling prepared
so
Congratulations just for being here because a lot of people want to but very few people actually take the steps
to, but very few people actually take the steps. So how to become a comedian? There are three levels to my particular classes, okay? So the first one is the one I'm talking
about here.
That's kind of an interesting structure. And with the levels structure, it allows me to
charge more than one time to you for these classes. If we just have the one single
level it's more difficult for me to justify an additional charge.
Guys, he has both pay seminars, textbooks, and workbooks. And I read a review of one
of the workbooks and he leaves a lot of blank space for you
to write your own stuff in the workbooks.
That's smart.
That's what comedy is a lot of it's about writing, but you're saying that maybe it's
makes the book seem like it has more information in it that it does because a lot of the pages
are blank.
Yeah, so write your own jokes here.
That's brilliant. Smart, actually. I say, write your own jokes here. Brilliant.
Smart, actually. I think people,
they definitely utilize that when they're doing
those self-help things or whatever,
or you want it to seem more substantive and have more in it,
you'll put some blank pages.
Put your thoughts on there.
Yeah.
Now, it's a 200-page book.
One, how to build a routine.
Very important. That's really the first step
because you're not going to feel good going to
the open mics or any of the shows.
Until you have something to do and feel good and
confident about that routine to get up in
front of people and take a shot at it.
Once you go through this class and everyone is required, it is a prerequisite.
And you'll understand as I go through this webinar
how important it is because there's so much language
that I need to teach you about.
Oh, good.
That's important, that's important.
You gotta know the language of it.
Because the reason for that, it's like it's sure you can do well.
You can start doing well in comedy. You'll find success.
But what the fuck happens when you're in New York City?
You're at the fucking table at the Comedy Cellar.
And all of a sudden, fucking Colin Quinn and Jim Norton are fucking
throwing the terms around and you don't have any idea.
Now you're going to look like an absolute fucking idiot.
You got to speak English.
That's rule number one.
What if one of them says, called nice call back and you're like, I wasn't on my phone.
Like, yeah, call back.
What are you talking about?
Tag. Oh, yeah, you're right.
Come on, Greg.
After right after that.
OK, once you finish this class, you go right into my level two classes,
which is writing an actual show and performing at the improv.
Hang on, hang on, hang on. That's
that's the same thing, building a routine and writing a show.
Yes. And also could.
Yeah. I mean, perform at the improv as well.
Now, that's how was I this always pissed me off as a.
They call it the improv.
It's not it's a stand up.
All of this written beforehand when you go.
That'd be like calling a hospital, a feel good place.
Yeah, it's just not accurate.
I'm telling you, that's really powerful. Go through that a few
times to start to get really get some material. Level three is
then we start giving you some special level three, how to be an
MC and how to do crowd work. Those will really accentuate
accelerate.
How to do crowd work is like teaching people how to do.
It's literally just speaking to people.
I know.
I think having a human interaction with someone and trying to be funny, you know,
like, hey, let's have a conversation with someone and like, let's try to be funny.
Like, what is there to teach about that other than like just stupid little tricks
that everyone's already used a bunch of times?
I don't know. That's yeah.
This guy did ask the question how to quiet a loud talking crowd.
Is there any way to quiet a loud talking crowd?
I was performing at a bar last week and the crowd wouldn't stop talking or being loud
no matter how loud I got.
Or even this guy just like yelling man.
He keeps getting his voice louder and louder.
And this is what I was talking about when my only experience in doing standup
was going to places that were not standup venue.
I'm going to an open mic tonight and I have gone to a couple recently.
I had a kid. So And I also stopped doing standup
before that, but I use the kid as the excuse now anyways. But I'm going to a couple and
it's at a comedy venue. And so it's a nice venue, good lighting, good mic, it's run by
comedians and it's just other open mic people in the crowd.
You know, the other open micers are the ones watching.
That is, no, it's tough, but it is.
I've said this so many times.
That is, I truly believe that is what an open mic should be.
It should be that and that only.
Like a dead open mic where people are performing
should just be performing to other people who want to do comedy.
Maybe if they're not on the show, they're there because they're thinking about getting into it or whatever. Just regular people
shouldn't go watch an open mic show because it's so bad. And it will make
them never want to watch a comedy show ever again and turn them off of comedy.
And so I think that's ideal. Brian, the idea of you doing it at a fucking bar
where people don't like that is the worst shit. That is the worst shit. An open mic
at a bar where there are customers who are fucking paying and they don't want to be there
is such a fucking nightmare.
The bar I performed at a lot is the first place I went and it was kind of, I don't know,
it was just a place that like the other places didn't seem like it would fit me. This place did. Um, and they had this really nice back.
Was it dirty? Hmm. Nevermind. Like dirty humor.
No, the place, the venue. Like, why did you say that it like fit you? Like what
you said to like the other place? I'm like, I'm not like, like a grungy kind of
like, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. It was less of the like, I'm not like like a grungy kind of like, yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah It was less of the like
Like it wasn't like a comedy club sort of thing, but it was all we didn't call that alt
Yeah, I guess I'm all that's a new it's a new type of alt comedy
That's a lot of people are doing these days that I don't fucking get for the life of me
But it's not a big not in the comedy clubs that I go to.
I go to some of the more old school comedy clubs, you know.
And yeah, I mean, I sure I think I would have.
So anyway, I go to this place.
It's a really nice place.
It has a back room.
People can choose to go back there and watch the show.
So they decide after a while we're going to renovate this back room.
And of course, the open mic guy that ran it was like, well,
what are we going to do with both the open mic?
And they should have said, you're not going to be doing it
for a while.
But instead they said, we'll just move the stage into the
bar area and you guys can do it there.
So you were really just there were people there after work
or there were people there like at night wanting to talk to each other on a date
and you're standing in this room and everybody's talking.
Nobody's paying attention, not even the the other comics are like hiding.
It was fucking hell.
I really think it's like bad for a person to experience that.
I really do.
I think it's like being ignored by people just like standing there and like, oh, I've
spent so much time and like this is important to me.
And I think this stuff, I really want to get out here and people to hear it because I think
it's funny.
And then to be ignored in that kind of a way, I think is like damn, it can be damaging to
you as a person, you know?
It is.
On the other side of it too, you just feel bad for these people who just worked eight
hours.
Oh, they 100% are in the right.
Yeah.
They should not be having to.
You're ruining their like, they're hard earned, like they've worked all day to get to this
moment and be able to do this and unwind.
And you're ruining that important moment for them.
Like this is it's really bad for everybody involved.
I think you're you're also in that moment.
At least I don't think I was like this, but I do know the other more
seasoned comics at this thing were like.
Fucking insulting the audience,. We're like fucking insulting the audience
and we're like really mad about the people talking
and talking shit about them.
And I was just like, come on man.
That's a big thing in comedy,
but it's a completely different scenario.
You have to recognize it.
If there's a cover and you're at a comedy club or whatever
or a theater and people are talking in that way,
yeah, that's brutal.
They're ruining it for everyone else.
But like, yeah, as we just discussed,
that's not what's happening here.
You're ruining their night.
Yeah.
It's interesting here.
This guy says a lot of bar shows are scenarios
where even prior or Carlin couldn't even win over the crowd.
So true.
That's a true statement.
There are definitely comedy shows that I have seen where the best comedian in the entire world at
that time could not have won the crowd over because they weren't going to listen to what
anyone had to say. They didn't care at all. You know, well, he gets a reply that says prior
would have won them over. Who you kidding, bud? Oh, yes. Dan, where did you start stand up by the way?
I'm just curious about what open mics were like when you started doing comedy.
I did maybe a total of three open mics in Buffalo before I moved to New York City and started here.
I would say I started in New York though,
but I did maybe three in Buffalo. When I was like, first one I did, I was probably 18,
too young to be doing an open mic.
And I remember I did,
it was going to make me sound like a terrible person,
but I did an original impression
of Terry Shivo at TGI Fridays or something.
Of course, it got absolutely nothing even though my friends assured me it was very funny
and very unique.
What kind of venue was it?
Was it a?
Really grungy bar?
One of those like, yes, CBGB type vibes.
I got you.
That was where I like to be.
What ended up happening with me really was like that there was this other bar
that was on Ohio State University campus, and it was just weird guys.
Yeah, it was just weird people sort of wandering
in it was more of a working class sort of thing and the people in there maybe weren't there for
comedy but they would give you a shot and that was the place I ended up you know doing really I
often did very well at that place and I actually I did so many jokes about like drugs and stuff
like that that this guy offered to do meth with me after the show.
Like he was just like, you want to go back there and smoke some meth?
And I was like, no, I'm OK, brother.
It was it was cool.
I but like, yeah, I didn't realize that.
He didn't realize that he just caught you a bit late. Yeah.
When you said you're doing it in Buffalo, like I feel the reason I quit was that if I were to be in Columbus, Ohio, it's fucking pointless.
Nobody's ever going to see me.
You know what I mean?
And so you're really just doing it for yourself at that point, which is fine.
Do it.
It's not entirely.
I mean, you're right by a touring comic could come through and see if that's the only chance
you know if you have a comedy club in town and you can like open for a
Headlining comic then a headlining comic could see you and be like, oh man
You're super fucking funny and then like ask you to come out on the road or whatever and that could help you
So but you're right the the opportunities if you plan to stay in like a smaller market like that is pretty fucking
You know shot in the yeah
It's pretty pretty unlikely
Yeah, and I didn't I I thought like I thought it was a waste of time
And I was never going to get that opening for a comic because I wasn't gonna go do the funny bone
Which is the uh?
The comedy club in town. I had no interest
It's in a fucking mall.
And I was and, you know, I was snobby.
I was like, I'm not going to perform with my
the other side of the wall is the buckle.
You know what I mean?
Like I and also in my ear, you thought you were too good for that?
No, I just thought it didn't fit with what I did.
OK, you know what I mean?
I don't like you. Oh, I see.
Because you were like, you're like, now fuck the man.
We have this.
Okay. It's just 2011 people that listened to the old podcast,
know what kind of humor I was doing at that time. You know what I mean?
It was very dirty and grungy and it was about fucking, you know,
it was about like, I was a white trash guy talking about it.
And like, it just didn't fit at a place like the funny bone.
And the other side of that is,
is a certain amount of fear because in order to perform
at this comedy club, you had to perform to just like
the owner and a talent.
That's bizarre that they make you do that.
That's kind of weird.
But you, but you, by the way,
you could put at a fucking comedy club,
you could definitely do that comedy.
I think that you talk, you know what I mean?
I think it would have gone over fine.
Dan, what were you saying, Dan?
No. The cool thing about being in a mall at least is,
if you want to find some people that dig your style,
you go to the hot topics, say,
hey, I'll buy you that Terrifier 2 backpack if you come check out the show.
Oh, shit, like, like because they do that in New York, you're barking or whatever,
but you're barking around and you're fucking that's that mall parking.
Oh, I'll throw down for that Bride of Chucky Zippo lighter if you come check out the show.
You got a full house full of people that are going to be.
Hey, Orange Julius or Dairy Queen, what are you looking for?
You know, you're in the food court.
Yeah, that's how it all barking, ball barking, you know, would be fucking next.
I got it. I got to tell you what's across from the comedy club
at at the mall that I go to, which would have been really good for me now,
not back then as the Lego store is right.
Frank collects Legos or whatever,
but I don't want to get into it.
Well, I'm saying that I could bark at the Lego store.
You went to that thing and you were like,
are you an A-Fold?
You do some MOCs and stuff like that.
I could go there and be like,
Oh, you into Legos, man?
I've built a lot of these Lego sets.
You could definitely get a full,
you could go in there and you know so much about Lego
that you could be like, Oh yeah,
I'm going to perform a fucking Lego based set.
And then you don't have to have all Lego based jokes.
You just fucking get a couple of references in there, whatever,
or like just sort of shoehorn it in and then sort of wink at him,
not at him when you do those ones and they'll be happy.
This guy goes, here's here's some more hints for dealing with a loud crowd.
Windmill Ruiner says, talk quietly.
You'd be amazed how curious people get when the guy on stage is whispering.
I've actually seen that work before.
I'm not even joking.
I've seen somebody that,
but you have to have that incredible charisma.
You have to have that.
But there's this guy named Darryl Lennox,
he's an American comedian,
but he'd come up all the time.
He's a blind comedian who had his eye surgery up here in Vancouver,
so he would always perform,
but I've seen him in like the worst room ever. And then he just, yeah, he quieted down and started like speaking really quietly. Like,
but he commanded the room in a way normally that was like, but yeah,
I have seen that work before.
My good buddy, my good buddy, Joe Paris. Oh yeah. Oh yeah. You know,
he'd come out,
he would adjust the mic for a full like 30 seconds before he said a word and then people would sort of just be like, what's going on?
And quiet. Yeah, totally.
Oh, he's great. Well, let me ask you this, Dan, because this guy gives some advice that I thought might be a little interesting. And then you have the most experience, I think, out of the three of us. This guy goes, move into your most dangerous material.
People will pay attention if they hear something they don't like.
You have to resolve it to actually be funny and make paying attention to it worth your time.
So would you go into your most dangerous material?
Oh, I don't know what I go into, like all of my material because it's like fucking try to find something not dangerous
I think like yeah, maybe there's certain buzzwords like that might peak people's interest
Like if you say if you have a joke about let's say pedophiles or something and people say what's he done?
Yeah, it could work. A guy did say power words.
Have you ever heard of power words either one of you know,
this guy says our words could work like tits, danger and asshole.
So the power of the power words are tits.
What are they? What are they?
It's danger, asshole, etc.
Someone's talking about danger? What?
You gonna say danger?
What if I heard you say tits?
Tits, danger, and asshole are the most powerful words.
They're power words.
Those are the most powerful words that you can say are tits danger and asshole.
You do not want to put them around.
I love to hear Carlin's, a new version of Carlin's.
Oh yeah.
Some of the words of the three power words.
The three powerful words.
The three power words.
Let's check in with Greg.
Your comedy career because when you get out there,
you're going to see most of the MCs out there are terrible.
When you become a really good MC and you have some material,
everybody's going to want you on their stage.
And it's not really a level four, but really after that,
what we find is people pass up the open mics really quickly quickly and they get into working rooms and then
it's just like them working comedians like the huge is like that i don't know if it's
in the simpsons like huge profits was that what's that where there's just a diagram where it's like
the idea then the arrow and then huge profits but they don't really have the where it's like, I know your idea, then the arrow and then huge profits,
but they don't really have the connection.
It's like results.
You are now a working comedian.
You bypass the open mic.
Yeah.
Oh, you have to do some, but you do less.
On average, you have to do less open mics then.
Oh, you did the classes?
Oh, did you do all three levels?
Oh, okay. Yeah, you'll be opening for Joe Rowe
Yep, quit your job. Go ahead, go ahead and quit your job
Go ahead and quit your job if you're coming close to being finished with level three the MC stuff
Yeah, you can go ahead and give you two weeks
You have a car, right? You can because they have comedy condos, which I've heard a lot about
You have a car, right? You can because they have comedy condos, which I've heard a lot about. And have you, Dad, have you actually stayed? Do you stay? Are there comedy condos in America a lot?
I've only stayed at like two in my in my I have stayed in in Calgary.
I don't know if you performed in Calgary, but yeah, anyways, I stayed in a famous comedy, you know, a classic, hey, check behind the
check in inside where they put the, you know, where they put the fucking, you know, the
dishwasher detergent, I left a little goodie in there, you know, and you go there, it's
the oldest driest weed you've ever seen.
Unsmokeable.
A little bit more Greg. Depending on how hard you work at it. Right now what
we're talking about is level one how to build a routine. All right here we go. So here are
some of the things that my students are saying about my classes. Greg teaches you how to
actually write a joke. I mean you go to a nice thing like and no one oh
I don't know famous comedian or I don't know he's coming in one year. These are testimonials. Yeah, he's one
He's a bit of a one channel
This is just testimonials from like his students, but they're not they're not like I
Well, I don't know this guy and he doesn't even give his name
His name if he was famous, right? Yeah
There knows what a joke is and then you go there and you do and then you tell one and you actually get laughs
I'm like most other people
Can I just can I just um buzz over saying maybe so the these are comedians you're saying and you're trying to help them to
become working comedians and you have this video that you're posting that has you know,
thousands of views on it and you don't even put their name on it. So weird. I just put their
name on it. Maybe somebody looks them up like that's the whole name of the game. You're like
teaching a class on this and you're like not giving them this
expo that seems kind of rude.
Stand up class ever so I don't think I never would have done it if it wasn't for him.
You helped me to.
Oh my god he's so quiet you probably can't even hear what he's saying.
Yeah yeah yeah yeah it's crazy.
What makes me funny and then help me bring that out.
And makes me also feel more safe to try new things and kind of be more. Thanks Greg.
We're talking about comedy, right? This is the biggest shortcut. I'm talking about years of
shortcut into learning and through the process.
Years of shortcut. Well, there you go. My students talking.
Well, there you go. I mean, hey, so for all of you, there you go.
If for some crazy reason you weren't already convinced, I don't know what the fuck I'm talking
about. I probably settled it for you.
He's about to say something that kills me.
Burnt in the results that they got the last one that talked about how
this is a shortcut, he became a paid
headliner within one year and three months of taking the class
you were you were looking at right now.
Really that quickly.
What's his name?
Of course, he worked hard and people ask,
how did you do that?
What's his name, Greg?
I just-
Greg, maybe give him a shout out.
It sounds like he's a working comic now.
He could use a promo, maybe a first name.
Can you give me a first name?
Maybe I could go off of that.
I could look up first his-
Maybe if he has a unique first name,
I could potentially look that up,
stand up comedian and find it. Maybe any sort of information that could help me
find this guy maybe I could snip his picture and put it in google image search I could google
reverse image search it and see I mean yeah I guess in Greg's defense he is giving us the option
to reverse google image screenshot reverse Google image search and then boom.
So he's doing some promo in a way.
Give us some more Greg.
He told me to do and that's pretty much it.
He embraced the technique.
He took the other seminars.
He took the class about how to make money.
All of those things and worked really hard
and followed the kind of not the formula,
but the steps.
Headliner.
Okay.
So I just want to add that this royalty free jazz music is really adequate.
Oh, yeah, I love guys to do because we watch this guy, Michael Nolan, and he's better than
Greg, I think, at doing this kind of thing because he does this
thing where it's constantly zooming in but it never slowly it's very slowly zooming into a place
that it never gets to it's really really difficult to watch actually but yeah this guy's music is a
little too loud in the mix as well it's coming in like a little bit too loud, which is good because it means you don't forget about it. Yeah, it's present. Here he goes. He starts giving
some advice here. What anybody can do with a little bit of hard work. Next, I'll talk about
my credentials. There we go. Super fun about me talking about myself. So this is rather short,
and I'll have another video that goes more deeply into.
This second, hang on, can you pause it? This is just, I am getting terror. My red flags are going off here. I'm getting the vibes of a con man here. You know what I'm saying? I know this part,
it's in me, you know, but my credentials are in me. I don't like to get through it. It fascinates
me. Another thing that we'll do about that. a comedian that doesn't like to talk about himself.
Kind of a unicorn, aren't you?
Yeah, that does not make sense at all.
It sounds to me like maybe you don't have the credentials.
But let's hear it. We don't know.
He's a very old guy, so he's had a lot of time to do.
He's been around for the whole time of comedy, basically, I feel like.
Well, here he goes.
Down in my lifetime, which is a lot of odd things. It's fun. But just first of all,
I'm a paid regular at the Comedy Store. As far as I know, I still am.
Okay. Well, if you're a paid regular, by the way, you know that you are.
Okay, well, if you're a paid regular, by the way, you know that you are like the one the people who are paid regulars are friend, someone I know staff told have you know, she's recently
became a paid regular at the Comedy Store. She's very funny. Canadian comic. Does she
know? Yeah, she knows she is because she's in that she's in constant communication, I
would imagine with the club, you know, seeing about when she's performing.
The paid regulars means you're regularly performing there. They're giving you a call every week
to see what your availability is and then putting you onto the show.
He also the picture is the picture is the comedy store. And it's the it is a they have
it signed by all the community like there's so many signatures all over the world. And he has, yeah, he's he's taking the little it's like a forensic photo,
you know, like he's got the red box around this little part that you can't see.
And he's got the zoomed in thing, the two red lines
showing you that it is indeed Greg Dean.
Now, it could, of course, be doctored.
Or you could. I've heard people sometimes will go and write their own names on the thing.
Oh, I think that people do that all the time as a bit.
They sign it, they do it like content creators online
have like their fans go and sign it for like their name
or like a inside joke or whatever as a goof.
Yeah, I mean, the artists, graffiti artists
just having a laugh, but also this guy says as far as I'm concerned,
as far as I know, I'm still a paid, right? I mean, I don't know why I wouldn't be. Here
we go. Can you back up? Can I hear them say that again? Time, which is a lot of odd things.
It's fun. But just first of all, I'm a paid regular at the Comedy Store.
As far as I know, I still am, even though I haven't performed there in years.
My name's on the wall.
Just go to the Comedy Store, you'll see my name down there.
And I got that a while back.
But as far as I know, I'm still a paid regular.
I've just retired from stand-up.
Next is teaching stand-up comedy.
I was the first stand-up
comedy school in the world. Okay, hang on a second. So now we're on to your teaching career already.
Yeah, yeah. This is kind of like, do you know what I mean? This is kind of like your manager,
like some football, European football manager, and he's talking about his playing career. And
he's just like, you know, I played played for the youth B side for two seasons.
Anyways, let's get on to my managerial record now.
So now you're in telling everyone else what to do.
I mean, your only thing is to say you were paid
regular at the Comedy Store,
which I don't know how we could verify.
There's just so many names on that wall.
He can't verify.
He can't verify it. He can't even verify it. You know what I mean it's just you'd expect
like there's just like a some sort of something you could actually show like a stand a set
on the Tonight Show or whatever. Yeah. HBO thing or whatever. Well there's, I promise. I started in 1982. Wow, there was a class here and there, but not a school.
Not a full blown school with books and curriculums
and a process for you to actually learn step by step
the things you need to do to become a standup comedian.
Here are some of the places that I've taught.
I've taught at the improv. I taught at
the Comedy Store in Hollywood and La Jolla and San Jose. The Comedy Nest in Montreal.
Oh Canada.
Weekend there. That was a whole lot of fun.
Oh, hang on.
And he actually did it for one weekend there.
Well, what is that? You can just rent out these spaces. I think is what's going on here.
I've performed at the Comedy Nest.
It's a very good comedy club.
That was the comedy club where I saw Rick Glassman
intentionally get no laughs for 20 minutes.
It was pretty funny.
He told everybody in the green room that he was going to get
zero laughs that he promised that he would get zero laughs.
It was a pretty good crowd and he went up and got zero laughs that he promised that he would get zero laughs. And it was a pretty good crowd. And he went up and got zero.
That's great.
Here he starts here in the U.S.
Also, I work with Tony Robbins for a spoof about eight months, I would say.
It was a great experience.
I was his actually his personal assistant.
What?
I end up credentialed.
Oh, my God. his personal assistant. I would book if he was going to get lunch somewhere, I would call the restaurant, see if they had any tables available. And I'd have to remind them is
a is a bigger gentleman. so he might need some extra
seating space you know credential I think you know we're going to say a while okay and if you
know anything about what he teaches which is NLP I'm an NLP master practitioner and master trainer
yeah I'm sure you got all the things for free along with Tony.
I did a 30 foot fire walk.
Great metaphor because you think you can't do it.
Listen, can I can I can you can you pause it?
Have I mentioned on the podcast before that?
Have I talked about the fact that I've done it?
I went to a Tony Robbins thing and did the 30 foot fire walk.
Oh, how was it? No, I.
So it was a work.
It was like a place I worked like some shitty office job, like administrative
job or whatever that I had when I was younger.
And the job sent a bunch of the people there like I didn't pay for it.
OK, it was like paid for by the job.
And I did not.
I just want to be clear.
I was never like, oh, this is good.
I think this could be helpful.
There was never, not even when I was younger
did I think that I thought it was funny the whole time.
It was very funny to me.
I was having a really good time.
It was out at UBC Thunderbird Stadium,
out at the university.
And, but I remember they did the fucking 30 foot firework.
That's the big thing you do you go and see this
shitty seminar where he just basically sells you his Tony
Robbins University. So the whole thing is a big sales pitch for
why you need to go for the whole $1,500 thing or whatever. And
then you do the fire walk. But the best part about it was it's
some lady fully fucking burnt her feet.
You can't do it. Oh buddy, because you have to run across fat.
You just have to run across.
It's very easy to do.
You just have to run across and then you just don't feel it.
You know, but yeah, this lady just like didn't she just like kind of stopped out there and
like got severe burns like an ambulance.
That's here's more credentials.
You can. That's the big teaching is, oh my gosh.
Goodness, I can't possibly do that.
Oh my gosh.
Oh my God.
You guys are almost as bad as me.
We talk about flubs a lot out here because Brian, he has a lot of famous fl Marbley mouth. Yeah, he and he like called Bill Murray, Bill Murphy and chill.
That was a he's a he's a he's a kind of a buffoon in a way when it comes to that kind
of thing. He's mocked. He's mocked heavily. And Dan, you're gonna love this. The people
people will take his flubs and he's like, Oh, you know, he finally escapes the world
of his flubs, his podcast where he's like, Oh, finally, I
can relax and not be, you know, confronted with these errors
I've made. I'll go watch wrestling, AEW wrestling, my
favorite wrestling promotion. Now what's happened twice is two
people have gotten signs on TV with his flubs on there to
confront him about his flubs on his favorite fucking wrestling show.
So shout out to those two people who did that.
Very, very good. Keep them coming.
Yeah, whoever you are, please do Oh My Gush next time.
Yeah, do Oh My Gush.
Oh My Gush is super, super good.
But yeah, that is all to just say that like, I
think Brian is really enjoying this, the kind of being able to get in on it and like, Hey,
look, we're now I'm on the team. We're all making fun of it. You know, like in school
or whatever, he's really living this up. Let's hear it again? Oh yeah, oh yeah. Here he goes. It's the big teaching is, oh my gosh.
Goodness, I can't possibly do that.
Oh my gosh, goodness.
Oh my gosh is such a good one.
You kind of go, well, what else in the world
do I think I can't do and I can.
Yeah, I bet I can fucking fly.
I bet if I jumped off a building, I could fucking fly.
Powerful. Next is my alumni.
Oh, good. Good. How many people?
I can't cover them all.
It literally goes too many to name.
Let me do it. Even first of all, we Goldberg.
Oh, hang on, hang on, hang on.
No way. Wait, wait a second.
I doubted this, but here's a direct quote from Whoopi Goldberg.
I studied with Greg Dean and see where I am today.
It's also not an endorsement at all. It's like I study with him and I see where I am
today. Doesn't credit Hayden or anything.
Yeah, there's no correlation between the two.
This is such a, I mean, that is the most fake quote that I've ever heard of enforcement.
I studied with Greg Dean and can you imagine Whoopi Goldberg just saying, I studied with
Greg Dean and see where I am today.
That sounds like her to be honest.
To be fair, that sounds just like something.
Yeah, I mean, I haven't been watching.
I don't watch the view very often.
So maybe that's that's a normal way for her to talk.
Berg, I trained her back in the day and she's just back in the day.
Back in the day, he trained is very vague.
I trained her back in the day. In what capacity, where?
Sister Act.
Sister Act era.
You would have never got Sister Act without Greg.
And look where I am today.
That was one of my students didn't believe me
and wrote her and she wrote him back.
No.
No.
Okay.
Okay, hang on, hang on.
I just imagined something incredible.
And that is that Greg Dean said like, because he doesn't know our email, the student doesn't
know the emails.
Greg Dean is like, Oh, here's our email.
It's whoopi Goldberg 14 at gmail.com.
And he went and got the fucking email.
This next one you're gonna love. Anthony Jessel. Are you? Okay, hang on. Here's more modern day Jessel Nick. Yeah, this guy is a he's a big time comic, you know, for tours around. I haven't seen
him do stand up lately. I will say that I think
he has some of his early stand up specials. I think he had some really, really good jokes in there.
Like, yeah, he made me laugh a lot. I have no idea what his current stuff is like, you know,
his quote here is magnificent. You'll hear what I mean. He was dark and he said, okay,
now if it's an honest, Yeah, that's who you really are
That's fine. You know, that's so good being like being like, oh, yeah
Jessel Nick was like should I do dark?
And I was like, I if it's who this is this is I love this guy so fucking like this is like
Jim Norton does a character called Doug Bell, who is this like, you know, I used to be on the show, Doug Bell.
Then glad to meet you, you know, like, you know, and this is like the stories he tells, you know, like every person like owes him their career kind of, you know, I just love the idea of this like yeah, Jessel Nick and then fucking let me I mean, you know
a fucking Dean cook came up
He said, you know should I I don't know about using physicality in my set and I was like
I was like Dane if that's who you are, man, you gotta do it
Let's hear a shit
Okay, I want you to dance please. You know, Carrot Top, he came to me and said, should I pull a bunch of fucking weird ass
props out of a suitcase?
I said no.
I don't know.
I don't know.
It doesn't feel right to be pulling the stuff out of the suitcase.
I said, Carrot.
I said, Carrot, if that's you, you gotta do it.
That's too much, too fucking much.
That's who you really are.
That's fine.
You know, and you see, I learned joke writing from the best.
So that was his quote.
That's as cool as I learned joke writing from the best.
So you're not you're not in his.
Doesn't say comma Greg Dean.
Yeah, no, no, no mention of you in that quote.
You are making a lot of assumptions.
Could be anybody.
Anybody.
Anybody. Yeah.
Sherry Shepherd.
I don't know Sherry Shepherd.
He's on the view.
Oh, okay.
On the view.
So he's got a very view-based, you know.
Here we go. She's one of my students as well. She's done really well. view based, you know.
Here we go. She's one of my students as well.
She's done really well, has a lot of major television shows,
performs all over with a lot of my other students like I saw recently.
They were on the same bill was Christina P.
She goes by Hang on a second.
So this is this is from your mom's house podcast.
Yes, she's Canadian, I believe. She's house podcast. Yes.
She's Canadian, I believe.
She's a fellow Canuck.
Okay.
She is married to Tom Segura,
who is known as the rich comic.
He's known as the wealthy comic.
Very rich.
So she is very wealthy.
She's very, very wealthy.
I used to listen to your mom's house podcast.
So I've listened to a lot of Christina Pajitsky. She is funny. She's definitely, very wealthy. I used to listen to your mom's host podcast.
So I've listened to a lot of Christina Piszczicki.
She is funny.
She's definitely made me laugh, but I will say there's,
there's something about her.
She's not, she seems genuinely mean sometimes
in like a bad way sometimes.
But anyways,
Greg said, if you're mean, go for it.
I was just gonna say, maybe she's embracing the word of Greg Dean.
It is very interesting.
This is an eclectic group of people that he has taught.
Now, what do you think chances are these are just people he maybe talk to about comedy?
Yeah, like had a conversation at a club.
Yeah, like I can't imagine I mean I
Could these people you could reach out to them, right? You could ask them. Did you in fact take his comedy class?
I might do that. I know this is seems rude
I I don't want to scrutinize the guy's business too much, but I might reach out to it with some of these tools
They you know, I also heard quote as well is like I took a comedy class and I fell in love with it.
Not giving Greg Dean any sort of credit or anything.
Is he taking credit for anybody who's done a comedy class of any kind, regardless of
whether or not he does he feel like he's like built curriculum because he's been doing it
for so long that like, you know, he's kind of like, Hey, he's kind of Howard Stern, everyone's kind of borrowed
from him. Anyone who's teaching a comedy class, they've got a little Dean in there. It's safe
to say he invented classes. Yeah, don't close. No close. He's got Netflix special, Mother Inferior,
and your mom's home podcast.
Oh, I'm so gross.
This guy is a legend.
This guy is a fucking legend.
This guy, we have to check in with this guy again.
We're going to end the episode soon,
but believe me, Greg's gonna be out in the stream.
Yeah, we could just do this forever. It's just crazy. I just realized we've been going for almost
an hour and 20 minutes. It really does not feel like this is really, I don't know. This has really
been a lot of fun. I hope the audience is enjoying listening to this because this has been probably
the most fun episode for me to do. I don't know if you title your episodes, but maybe it could be, Oh my gosh, your mom's home.
I got to put that in, like I'll put it in the description.
Yeah, the description.
Oh my gosh, your mom's home.
Yeah, and he's almost done here, so.
I fell in love with it,
which is the class and standup comedy.
So I could go on for quite a while yet.
I think points been made, I think here.
Next is my books.
All right. So here we go.
Now here's some books.
Well, no, I don't want to watch it.
It's just we're going to we're going to end.
We have to end. But it just needs he's he's it has not been very long.
He's already into, you know, something we have to end but it's just needs he's he's it has not been very long He's already into you know something you have to buy
I'm gonna buy his book of his you know, like the book is very important. You have to have it
It's good, you know, it's not in place of the class
It's like an aid that you have to have with the club. He Goldberg has it
Whoopi Goldberg has 10 of these books. She swears by it.
Here, look at this quote from her.
I read a book the other day and it was good.
We'll be over.
Oh man, this was so fun.
And we have a new character.
He can be added to the list of Tom and Bunny
and Michael Maniel.
We can watch him on the stream.
We can watch him.
Maybe we can try to find him performing.
I got yous.
Ron the liar.
Oh, but Dan, tell people where to find you.
You can find me on social media at DanLakataSucks.
And if you'd like, please check out my standup special
for the boys.
It's on YouTube.
I filmed it at my old high school
for an audience of 15 year old boys. And yeah, please check it out.
I really, I will put my name behind that special.
I watched it and it was fucking awesome.
And I think you probably a lot of you guys have seen it maybe if you're,
if you're listening to this, but if you haven't watched it and even if you're
like, Hey, I would never watch a standup comedy comedy special you should just watch it it's fucking awesome yeah
thanks man I'm gonna put a quote from joy Behar on my website you should I saw a comedy special that
was fun joy behar oh thank you so much for doing a show. It was a lot of fucking fun. I didn't even for the listeners.
I didn't get through like half of the stuff that I cut out for the episode
because Greg is so good.
So we will probably be catching back up with Greg Dean and all that stuff
on the stream and on guys plus, which you can get on Patreon dot com slash
murder X Brian.
We will. Nice nice promo.
And that's good.
It's promo.
Promo is important in comedy.
It's another aspect of it.
Yeah, Greg told me and we will be seeing you next week with something.