Habits and Hustle - Episode 12: Brian Cain – Mental Performance Coach – The Ten Pillars of Mental Performance Mastery

Episode Date: May 21, 2019

Metal performance coach and creator of the 10 Pillars of Mental Performance Mastery System, Brian Cain shares the benefits of coaching and his best tips and life hacks. After defining what mental performance coaching is, he talks about how he went from working with kids to Fortune 500 executives as well as athletes in the NFL, NHL, UFC, PGA, and MLB. He also speaks to the power of self-talk, stoicism, affirmations, books, meditation, the benefits of eating the same thing every day, how fitness and focus are connected, the concept of control, and how losing weight changed his life. 📺 Youtube Link to This Episode Brian Cain’s Website ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐ Did you learn something from tuning in today? Please pay it forward and write us a 5-star review on Apple Podcasts. 📧If you have feedback for the show, please email [e-mail]  📙Get yourself a copy of Jennifer Cohen’s newest book from Habit Nest, Badass Body Goals Journal. ℹ️Habits & Hustle Website 📚Habit Nest Website 📱Follow Jennifer – Instagram – Facebook – Twitter – Jennifer’s Website Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

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San Antonio, Texas. Vitamin water zero sugar just dropped in all new taste with zero holding back on flavor. You can be your all feeling. I'll play and all self-care you. Grab the all new taste today. Vitamin water zero sugar. Nourishcare you. Grab the all new taste today. Vitamin water's zero sugar, nourish every you. Vitamin water is a registered trademark of glass O. Hi everyone, welcome to Habits and Hustle.

And we have today one of my favorite people. His name is Brian Kane. He is one of the world's foremost authorities on mental performance. His mental performance training strategies have been used by thousands of elite performers and top athletes worldwide. On today's episode, he will teach us and help us

how to we can develop better self-discipline, better focus, and have a better mindset. We will go over what he calls his 10 pillars of peak performance and much more. So if you want to level up your life in any way, shape, or form, today is the episode for you. Stay tuned. And...

So, I am... So I mean, I'm so excited to have you. I think everybody knows around my block and down the street and everyone I work with I am Brian Kane who is in my opinion one of the best mental performance coaches out there because he Actually explains you actually explain the practicality of how to implement things as opposed to just theory sure So thank you so much. You flew in just to do this podcast, and I am just beyond appreciative over that. Oh, thanks for having me.

Like I said, my pleasure. Let's start with the basics. Can you tell, can you kind of explain what mental performance coaching is in layman's terms? Absolutely. So probably to understand what mental performance coaching is, it's probably easier to start with what it is not. So to do that, let's bring out a couple props, right?

So if you think about like the field of mental performance coaching, which a lot of people now might use the term mental conditioning coach, peak performance coach, mental skills coordinator, sports psychologist, applied sports psychologist. So how is that similar but different to mental performance coaching? Okay, let me give you an example. So if when you go to school to become a mental performance coach, you go into a applied sports psychology program. However, when you get into sports psychology, think about three domains, right? Three areas. There's what we'd call clinical sports psychology, which is going to be your straight clinical psych work. So drug alcohol addiction, body image, dealing with depression, those sort of issues. That's not mental performance coaching,

that's clinical sports psychology if you're working with athletes. Clinical psychology if you're working with non-athletes. Then you have research sports psychology, which is your classic academic like, let's take three people that have never shot free throws before. And you're gonna visualize shot free throws before and you're gonna Visualize 10 free throws for a week and person B's gonna visualize five and shoot five and person C is gonna shoot 10

And then at the end we'll test and see okay, great. What does that prove imagery works? Okay, now what right? How do I use it? How do I go from theory to application and that's what mental performance coaching is is How do I go from theory to application? And that's what mental performance coaching is, is it's taking what's talked about in research and making it practical for the everyday person. So saying you have to use mental imagery, and then as an athlete saying, okay, well, as a tennis player, before you serve the ball,

and you're dribbling the ball, and then you get ready to serve and hit it over the net, visualize the serve that you want to hit. Before you walk in to do a presentation or you walk in to close a deal as someone who's working in sales, visualize the entire process of it going good, it going bad and how you're going to manage that situation as you walk in as a UFC fighter. Visualize yourself not just getting the knockout but walking in the cage and the environment and the energy and everything that that's going to feel like is you're walking in there. So what we try to do as mental performance coaches is take what's talked about in research

but actually put it into action every day life with performers. So I should say, I mean, you work a lot, I mean, for people who don't know, you work a ton with top athletes. That's really, you're like, that's really the bread and butter, so to speak, right? With people who are already very high achieving and who have a lot of who are certainly disciplined and then you take it to the next level, right? And you're not always disciplined, it's very talented. Okay, very talented. I do not know who is disciplined. I should say that. People who are very talented, but then need to get their mental, that their brain's focused and disciplined,

and there's a lot, you've got 10 pillars, which is what I was gonna say. So Brian breaks this down in a really easy way. He has 10 pillars, and why don't we kind of touch on each one? So we can understand how we can better. I'm sure. And as we go through the 10 pillars, as your audience will probably go, I do that already.

Right. But do it to the best ability. Do it as well as I can. So, if you look at the 10 pillars, the first pillar is what we would call a lead mindset. Do you have a growth or do you have a fixed mindset? You know, somebody that allows your feelings to dictate your actions or someone who's going to understand that your actions will change your feelings. And which one do you focus on?

That's just kind of the tip of the iceberg of a elite mindset. The second pillar would be motivation and commitment. Do you understand what it is you're after? Do you have clarity of what you want, and why you want it, and then have a path to be able to get there? And do you have the motivation and commitment deep enough

to be able to handle the adversity and the grind, and everything that's going to come to try to knock you off your path. And then step, the pillar three is the focus and awareness, right? Do you have the focus and awareness to know when you're on task and what the things are that knock you off task? Because probably the greatest way to achieve any goal is simply time on task. And can you stay focused in the moment and after what you want? Pillar 4 is going to be self-control and discipline because just because you know what you want

and you have the motivation and commitment to get there, do you have the self-control and discipline to do it consistently and from a fitness standpoint, do you have the self-control and discipline to make the right decisions nutritionally because as you know, you can't outwork poor nutrition. Right. Pillar 5 is going to be the ability to keep the right decisions nutritionally because as you know, you can't outwork poor nutrition. Right. Right. Cannot. Pillar 5 is going to be the ability to keep the process over the outcome. Everybody wants to talk about outcomes. Motivational speakers will talk about keeping your eyes on the prize. Well, if you're looking at the prize, you're going to miss the step that you need to take

next to get there. Right. So when we talk about process over outcome, if you think about another visual of a staircase, everyone wants to look at the top step, but what they don't want to do is simply take the next one. And if you can take a staircase and sort of reverse engineer down into what's the next logical step for me to take, that's what the process is. Is that staircase that you have to climb to get to the outcome that you want? So when we talk process over outcome, another simple way to think about it is having a telescope

goal, seeing into the future, where do I want to go, but then bringing that back to a microscope goal of how am I going to attack the next 24 hours that I have to get me just a little bit closer to where I want to go. So that process over outcome approach is pillar number five. Pillar number six is going gonna be meditation and mental imagery. Meditation being, am I able to quiet my mind and stay in the present? Am I able to, you know, turn on the recovery switch, activate the parasympathetic, you know, nervous system,

and mental imagery as a tool to be able to visualize myself performing the way I want to for increased preparation and increased confidence, right? This whole mentality that if you can see it and you can believe it, you can achieve it like bullshit. You have to do a lot of the work, right? You can sit around and you can visualize all the the best body that you want to have. You can visualize right in a book. You can visualize doing all this great stuff, but if you don't put it into action on a daily basis, you're just daydreaming. Right.

You know, it's not going to help you get where you want to go, but if you have the work ethic and you have the understanding of the process and what it's going to take from a motivation and commitment standpoint and a focus and awareness standpoint, and you're doing the work on a daily basis, mental imagery can help you to get over that hump and help you to have increased confidence and preparation. Pill or seven is routines and habits of excellence, which I'm excited to talk about here, because we know we become what we do on a daily basis, right?

And a great quote that comes out at Jim Collins' book, Good to Great is that if you want to be consistent over time, you have to be able to describe what you do as a process. And you know, process is very similar to habits in what you do daily, and you have to inject that hustle in with your habits, or is very similar to habits and what you do, what you do daily. And you have to inject that hustle in with your habits or it's not going to happen for you. So I love about me and on your podcast is I think that you've nailed it on the head with habits

and hustle. You got to have a balance of both for sure. Thank you. Pill or eight is going to be time management and organization because you can have great goals. But if you can't manage your time, you're going to get beat by the person who can. Because time is a great equalizer of all people because there's 86,400 seconds in a day and 168 hours in a week and you have the same amount of time that I do. So if you're better with your time than I am over the course of time, you will get, you will separate yourself from where I'm at. Right.

And then pillar number nine is leadership anden number 10 is creating the right culture and surrounding yourself in the right environment of excellence to help you get to where you want to go. This episode is brought to you by Vonage. Is your business ready to integrate live video chats into your app? The Vonage Video API makes it simple for developers to build custom solutions that make sense for your business, from providing faster tech support and better customer service to hosting more productive meetings and classes. Live video enhances

every conversation. Go live on your terms with Vonage. Learn more at Vonage.com. Vitamin water just dropped a new zero sugar flavor called with love. Get the taste of raspberry and dark chocolate for the all warm. All fuzzy, all self-care, zero self-doubt you. Grab a with love today. Vitamin water's zero sugar, nourish every you. Vitamin water is a registered trademark of glass O. Wow, and so what you, so basically, when you work with your clients and these athletes, and also you work with the law of

like hyper like CEOs and very like high, like very high profile executives, I would imagine, do go through these 10 pillars and what do you do with them to kind of get all 10 pillars looked after like how do they how do they hone in on each pillar and get good at it and keep it consistent and work the program? I mean, to get started, they're doing it already. Right?

Everyone who's watching this video or listening to this bad gas right now, it has heard of the 10 pillars. It just haven't put, heard of it, and maybe in that framework. Like if you say focus and awareness, they'll go, oh yeah, okay, I would like to be able to focus better. Yeah, I'd like to have better self-control and discipline. Yeah, I'd like, oh yeah, okay, I would like to be able to focus better.

Yeah, I'd like to have better self-control and discipline. Yeah, I'd like to be a better leader. I'd like to be better with time management. So all of those, or what I would call skill sets, think about mental performance mastery or mental toughness. Whatever you want to call it. It's called mental performance mastery. That's a skill.

And that skill is made up of 10 skill sets. The skill sets being elite mindset, motivation and commitment, focus and awareness, but we just cover it. And in your opinion, okay, do you feel like anybody can master those 10 if they are disciplined and they have the work? So if someone is like, if someone, like you said,

you said it perfectly, you can, a lot of people are like, yeah, I wanna do that, yeah, I wanna be a better leader, yeah, I wanna lose 20 pounds, yeah, I wanna be more focused, but yeah, like the, from game from A to B, doesn't really, they're not doing it, right? Can you train your brain to actually become better at those things? 100%.

They're all trainable skills, right? There's, there's, there's skills that some people have and some people don't, but they're all trainable skills. And one of the pillars is not, you have to be six foot five. You can't train that. But how do you train, but they're all trainable skills. One of the pillars is not, you have to be six foot five, you can't train that. But how do you train? If you're, so if you're not, if you're not somebody who's disciplined, how do you become more disciplined in your opinion?

Start, start with one thing that you don't want to do every day that will help you to develop the skill of discipline. It's very, if you've probably seen the talk that Admiral William McCraven gave at the University of Texas, the commencement speech, where he said, you know, there's 10 ways to change the world, but you have to start with yourself. And he gave 10 seal team principles that will help the graduating students

from the University of Texas to change the world. You know what the first thing he said was, make your bed. That's a bit, that's been like a big, this is a very popular thing right now, making your bed is the first thing, right? Yeah, because it's, when that alarm clock goes off and you get up and you have the decision to make because ultimately it's your decisions that are going to determine your destiny.

Yeah. Is you have the decision to make, do I make my bed? And when you make your bed, one, you're acting different than how you feel, which is a skill of all great performers because you don't feel like doing it every day. That's right. Just do it anyway. Right. Feeling has very little to do with it. Once you make it anyway. Right. Feeling has very little to do with it. Once you make the commitment to decide that feeling has very little to do with it.

Yeah. So you act different than how you feel. You pay attention to detail and you exercise self-control and discipline over yourself and that little voice inside your head that goes, and I'll need to make the bed today. You tell it to fuck off and you make the bed. I love that. I also read that even when you travel

and you're in hotel room, you still make the bed. You're in my bed, yeah, I made it. I mean, at this morning, you know, it is in a sitting and you make it. And sometimes you start laughing, but it's like, I don't want to break the street. Right, you don't want to break the ritual.

And I know from experience, haven't done it now for a number of years, is that if I don't make my bed, something's off. Right. And I'm not making my bed because maybe I'm over tired and I'm sleeping to the last minute, or I'm not making my bed because I get up and I get out of my morning routine, where as soon as I pick up my cell phone, it's like the battle is on, right? Yeah, I agree.

So my mentality is I got to sweat before screen. So when I'm rocking really well, Yeah, it's up. It's up. It's make the bed and get moving. But if I don't make the bed, I know something is off. And if something is off, it's like the airplane that leaves San Diego flying to New York, right?

If the tip of that nose is one degree off, you're landing in Albany, or you're landing in Philadelphia. You're not hitting your goal in New York City. But you'll never know if that's one degree off until you get to your destination. Absolutely, I'm a big proponent of that. Like I've been doing the same morning ritual for like 20 years and I can never steer away. Even the most, the most, the, the, the new job it, like the glass of water I drink has to have,

it has to be here. It has to be room temperature. It can't be that. But those things keep you on point. Yeah. Which is a great segue into you. I, this guy, I'm telling you, I have never seen a more scheduled human in my life. I actually put your schedule daily schedule on my IG story because it was unbelievable. I've never seen it. It is, your day is scheduled to the minute every single day at five o'clock to five thirty, five thirty to five forty five, six o'clock to six thirty, you are so regimented, which is what you need to do to be successful and to get goals and to achieve your goals.

So like your morning routine is, what you're going to say, you go ahead, tell me what your morning routine is. Yeah, so the morning routine for me changes based off of like the, I call it the season, right? So it's pretty, the things that are going to be consistent, right? And I always start with a PM routine because a great PM routine leads you into the great AM routine. If you focus on the AM routine, but your PM routine is off, if your PM routine is off,

your AM is probably going to be off. I love that. So that's a very good point. Have a good night routine in addition to a good morning routine because they both work with each other. For sure. You can't really have one without the other. So at its very most simple form, my evening routine,

whether I'm home, if I'm home and I have a week where I'm going to be home, which hardly ever happens, but if that's the case, I'll maybe add some more things into the P.M. routine. But at the very basic level, when I'm 288 days a year on the road, and maybe not more than three days in a certain city And I'm all over the place by PM routine is gonna be lay out my clothes for what I'm gonna wear tomorrow Take my PM supplement routine my supplements. Would you take I'll take a thorn elite PM. I'll take a

What Thorne is the company. It's called elitePM. Is there is their vitamins? I'll take. What's in it? Oh, I stumped you. What's in it? I don't know. We'll pull up the bottle on your phone. I don't have to study it because it's right there. I don't know how many feet in a mile either. I'll just ask.

But I trust my coach and in my coach would say, you know, this is what you want to take for a nighttime supplement. Okay. So it's Thorin Elite PM. It's a CBD from Thorin, a hemp oil, and it's a zinc magnesium from ZMA. So I'll take that, and then depending on when I'm at, times and wise, I might take a milligram of melatonin. Try not to, but if I feel like I needed to fall asleep,

I'll do that, which is not often, maybe once a week. So I'll do that. I'll go lay out the clothes, supplements, and then I will put my phone on airplane mode and plug it in where I cannot reach it for my bed. If I can reach my phone for my bed, I'm going to be on it all night because it's too tempting. So I'll plug it in somewhere where I can't reach it, right? And that's it. That's the basic. And then I go to bed, ear plugs in, I'm asked and I'm out. And then when I wake up, I'm like, what time are you going to bed? Oh, it depends. And I can show you in my ideal day. My ideal day is 930 to 530, you know, in the ideal.

Like it. And I have it written down. I actually shared it with you in preparation. I have this as such an email. It says, here's the ideal day. Because I think if you don't know what your ideal day looks like, you're never going to achieve it. Right. So I have written down. Here's what my ideal day looks like. I never gonna achieve it Right So I have written down here's what my ideal day looks like I just don't get those unless I'm home and I control my schedule And you work in mental performance and your your mission is serving and educating and powering other people other people kind of dictate Your schedule right I don't have that luxury to build a great my own schedule most days. So the morning routine is wake up You know usually first thing I'm doing is going to the bathroom and then I'm going to take my morning supplements and then I'm going to get dressed and then I'm going to

make the bed and then I'm out the door working out trying to sweat before screens. Sweat before screens means if I don't work out before I get in front of the computer, before I open up my cell phone, it's probably not going to happen. I love what I do and as soon as someone says, hey, they have a question, like I see it, I'm going to answer it and then next thing, you know, Pandora's Box is open and I'll help break loose. Absolutely. I can into it. So what I've learned over the course of time and going from 240 pounds to 190 pounds based off of habits and hustle is that if I don't take care of myself first, I'm not worth anything for anybody. So I've got

to take care of my stuff first. So but the AM and PM routines, if I have more time in the morning, depending on the time I'm getting up, I'll read Ryan Holiday's Daily Stoic, I'll go through a calm, daily meditation. Okay, wait, so what's Daily Stoic? It's basically, that's very popular right now. Yeah, so Daily Stoic is a one-page, day, daily reader. And I've gone through, like I wrote a daily reader, the daily dominator. I've gone through John Maxwell wrote a daily reader the daily dominator I've gone through John Maxwell's Maxwell daily reader and I'm a big fan of just short and sweet and and to the point with a little bit of Inspiration information like right out of the shoot when you wake up in the morning and Ryan holidays daily stoic to me

Stoicism and that tattoo I have as an example of stoicism stop looking outside for answers and start looking inside for answers And stoicism is that the only meaning there is in life is the meaning that you choose to give to a situation. So, I two people can be in the exact same situation, they respond completely different. It's because of the meaning that they attach to that situation. So, every day, what Ryan does, he writes a page or two

and he'll have a quote from Marcus Aurelius or one played or one of your old stoics, and then Ryan will have a quote from Marcus Arrelia, so or one of your old Stoics, and then Ryan will take that quote, and he'll make it apply to every day like life of what's happening here in the 21st century. It's fascinating. No, I know Eric, we've a mutual friend, Eric Burns, also does that, and that's why,

did you get it from him, did you get it from you? Or you're both just doing it just by coincidence. Yeah, I think it was more coincidence, but I know he's a big, every day he's daily stoic and every day he's calm, you know, and actually, we're calm. The calm app, the calmness and meditation app. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, no, he's the opposite of calm,

but the calm daily meditation app, and what's cool with Cool Thereick is that every morning when he does it, he'll like send me a tax that he's done it. So there's an accountability partner there to that, you know. Which is super important. Having an accountability partner or having something you're accountable to, really helps the people's goals as well. 100% have to. And even so, how did you become so like vigilant like that? And red, like kind of like so structure. Did you were you always just like that like how did you even become a

Performance coach like just wasn't your back right? Two different questions there. How did I become so structured? Let's go to that first How did I become so structured? I had to get shit done Yeah, and I wanted and I was working as a high school health and fizzed teacher in Vermont and Years ago this was 2003 full four school year Wow, so I get out of grad school How many years ago was this? This was 2003 for school year. Wow. So I get out of grad school, which will go back to when I got, how did you get into mental performance coaching, but I'm teaching high school health and phys ed in Vermont and loved

it. And then an opportunity came up to be a high school athletic director. So I applied and I was at the time, I think the only person that applied that had a master's degree, so I kind of got it by default. But then I really enjoyed the athletic director's job too. It was like 85% of the time I loved it. And I was doing mental performance coaching on the side because when I got started, it was at,

I'll go back, I remember that it was clear as day. And my college baseball player, University of Vermont, struggling in athletics, failing for the first time, growing up in a small town in Massachusetts, you never really failed, right? And then you go to Division 1 College Baseball, everyone is equally as talented and you struggle and you fail.

And you think that the method for dealing with failure is work harder. But if you work harder with the wrong thing, all you do is get further from where you want to be faster. So I'm thinking, okay, I got to get in better shape. I get up and I'm running five, six miles every morning in Vermont when it's negative 30 degrees before practice and our practice was at like six o'clock in the morning indoors and my fastball goes from 88 to 82. Well, you know the difference between fast twitch and slow twitch muscle fiber and baseball is a fast twitch sport. Now it's training slow twitch So I was getting worse faster. Right. You drove me fucking crazy fucking crazy. So someone said, hey, you gotta go work

with our sports psychologist on campus. So I started to meet with her. It was helpful, but it was fascinating. And I'm like, wow, so there's a mental component to everything that we do, and you're trying to coach me on this mental component. Great. And then I remember it clears day July 4th, 2000,

Commonwealth Ave, Boston, Massachusetts There's a Barnes and Norble on the campus of Boston University. I was down there with a friend of mine from Alaska Who we were down there for July 4th? You wanted to send a postcard back to his mother in Alaska So he walked into Barnes and Norble first time I've ever been into a bookstore and it's kind of near Fenway Park So they have a baseball section So I walk over to the baseball section and I see a book heads up baseball playing one pitch at a time. My god this is interesting. Take it off the shelf and the author Ken Raviza who lived maybe 15 minutes from here in Redondo Beach had taken in that book and he wrote in like black boxes around the main points in the book. So if you flip through

you could go through the entire book Cliff Notes by reading the the black boxes in like 20 minutes. So you can go through the entire book Cliff Notes by reading the black boxes in like 20 minutes. Now I'm reading this book, Jen, and it's speaking to me like I've never heard any coach in the entire 21 years of athletics ever talk about control, which you can control. Focus on being in control of yourself before you can control your performance because you have to be in control of yourself before you can control your performance. You have very good little control of what goes on around you, total control of how you choose to respond to it.

It was like stoicism for baseball. Have a routine to be consistent, focus on the process, not the outcome. If you want to get drafted or play professionally, then focus on executing what you're doing today. Never heard someone talk about that. So I bought the book. Read the book, cover to cover, drive him back to Vermont. I made the kit from Alaska Drive.

I go to the library at the University of Vermont where I'm a phys ed major because I don't own a computer and I send them an email and just say, hey man, love your book. Really good. I want to be a college baseball coach. How do I get more of this? Three weeks later I get a handwritten letter and says, hey, I'm from Connecticut and a professor at Cal State Fullerton. We have a really good college baseball team here. If you come and you study sports psychology, you'll learn what's in heads at baseball, and I probably could get you to work

with our Fullerton baseball team. Sign me up. So I go out to Fullerton in 2002 and three, where the number one team in the country all year in 2003, you go to the College of Road series and lose. Then it's set, finished third. 2004, they're 15 and 16.

Worst start ever at Cal State Fullerton and they go like 36 and 4 the rest of the way in when the national championship and then the pitching coach got the job at UC Irvine and he called me and said hey would you come and work with us we don't have a budget I can pay for your expenses but we can't pay it to come out here work I said fuck I'll be there tomorrow sign me up I'm in so I start start flying to UC Irvine and we get it going. It's my first kind of team and I'm working with the pitching coach. I was with the last two years at Cal State Fullerton and then that summer he's on the team USA staff with the head coach from Vanderbilt

and the head coach from TCU. So I naturally I pick up Vanderbilt and TCU because of those three coaches. It's all word of mouth and this is helping our program. And at the time at TCU is a pitcher named J. Carrietta who wins the Si Young for the Chicago Cubs in 2015 is the best picture in baseball and there's a picture at Vanderbilt named David Price who wins the Si Young with the Tampa Bay Rays and just won the World Series with the Boston Red Sox this past year and at the same time. It's about 2007 I'm teaching a sports psychology class at the University of Vermont and one of my I'm teaching a sports psychology class at the University of Vermont, and one of my students is a strength coach who trains a UFC fighter named Tom Murphy. I'm like, those are UFC fighter in Vermont.

I want to, can I meet this guy? He trains in Montreal with George St. Pierre. Oh, boy. So I start going to Montreal with Tom and George at the time wins the title and then loses the title. And then Tom gets me connected with George. And then from there it was like the compound effect and just you go from three teams to six teams from one fighter

to four fighters. Next thing you know I've got to make a decision between do I want to continue to be a high school athletic director or try to go pursue this mental performance coaching thing full time because I was doing two full-time jobs right that's where the schedule came from is how can I be a how can I be a high school athletic director working like 70 to 80 hours a week and be a mental performance coach at the same time. And you're also like no joke. You're working with like the highest level of an athlete. Like George St. Pierre is the most recognizable biggest champion ever in UFC. And you've been his mental performance coach for years now.

Yeah, we started in May of 2007 right after August of 2007, like right after he lost to Matt Sarah. I mean, the last time he lost to fight. That's like, that's massive. So for people who don't know who that guy is, Google it because that just right there says a lot. So then you become a mental performance, that then you become a mental performance coach full time. And that's why you're, because you're scheduled so cookie between that and your other job, you had to become, you had to train yourself really to be super regimented and have structure. Yeah, but yeah, and I'll tell you that, you know, August 2nd, 2010, my mother passed away a lung cancer.

And the school district I was in, gave me, I said, Hey, can I, can I get a sabbatical? There's some things I need to take care of back home. And they gave me a sabbatical. So I had a year off, right? If no pay, and then I would get my job back, because there's only five full-time athletic directors jobs in Vermont. And I loved it. Loved it. But then I went on the road for like 90 straight days to try to build up some income from the mental performance side of things, to replace what I was losing for that year. Right.

And I'm like, yeah, if I don't do this, I'm gonna regret this my life. But now is the time. No kids not married, like let's go get it. And that's when the 208 A.C. your other road started. And I have a turn back since, you know, and you make decisions, right?

You make decisions not sacrifices. Like that's one of the things I learned from George. And I think when you do mental performance coaching, the cool part about it is you're around these really successful people that are looking for like that 1% edge. They're already at the top. That's what I was going to say, yeah. They're already at the top, but they want to stay at the top, right?

Because it's harder to, it's harder to stay there than to get there. That's absolutely right. So when they get there, they want to stay there, and they're looking for any edge they can get. And you know one of the things he said, you know one of the biggest differences that the mental performance has made for me is I'm not making sacrifices to be great.

And I'm making a sacrifice to be a world champion. It's a decision I'm making. In the decisions that I make every day, have to align with my goal of being not a UFC world champion, being the greatest mixed martial artist of all time. Because being a UFC champion has a finish line. And when you hit that finish line, which he did when he beat Matt Sarah

and won the title, it was like, well, now what? And then when he set the goal to be, I want to be the greatest mixed martial artist of all time, process goal, no finish line. Then every single day, you have to make decisions in line with that. And he did that better than maybe any athlete I've ever worked with.

Wow. Yeah. So what was that, when you worked on that 1% what was your methodology? Besides of course, like how do you train someone who's so good, not just talent, but also how is that discipline and everything else we talked about, how did you,

what was that little like extra thing that you did? But what was that little extra thing that you did? Um, it's not, it's like, if you look at the 10 pillars, right? It's sometimes it's 10% growth in one area. Most of the time, if they're already elite at the highest level, it's 1% growth in 10 areas. It's not one thing, it's a little bit of everything. So one of your questions earlier was like, well, where do you kind of get started when I'm working with CEOs or SEC football coaches or major league baseball managers or nine-year-old

Italy athletes or 19-year major league football veterans like Robobonius, where do you get started? You say, here's the 10 pillars, where do you feel like you're at in each of these areas? And then I give them self evaluation, let's go to 110 and where you feel like you're at and each of these areas? And then I give them self, like a self, like a self, yeah, like a self evaluation, a school, one to 10, where I feel like I'm at. Just like you would do as a fitness professional, you sit down with a one on one client and say, tell me about your fitness goals. How do you feel like you are with nutrition? How do you feel like you are with energy?

How are you doing with sleep? You're doing kind of an assessment of where they're at. And it's okay. Well, which of these areas do we want to go after first? And then, okay, well, what are you doing to grow your time management and organization? What are you doing right now to train your focus and awareness? What are you doing right now to train yourself control discipline? How are you training? You know your leadership skills if you need them and

Pillars one through eight are really like everyone needs not everyone needs leadership skill right no I was gonna say but with someone like right, who is already doing what you, that is that that 1% so little, so like let's say, where is the difference in the focus and awareness or the self-discipline with someone like him, George St. Pierre, where was it? Like how did you try,

what did you have to do to get to that next 1%? Listen, listen, ask, ask questions. Ask the right questions. Ask the right questions. Listen and then give strategy. Give strategy. He has to, he has to take the strategies that we decide. This is what we want you to do, the game plan.

Yeah. And then put it into action on a consistent basis because it will work. Mental performance coaching will work for anybody if they're willing to work it. Right. Right. Right. Everyone, anyone listening to this, their life will improve and benefit

if they get a stronger mindset, if they have better focus and awareness. And there's ways to train all those skills, they just have to do it. So for example, talking around mindset, okay, one of the things, one of the things that every UFC fighter, and I've had a chance to corner five guys that have been UFC world champions, George being one of them, is they

would say to me, man, I want to not be so nervous walking to the cage. I want to eliminate all self-doubt in the locker room. I want to be fearless. And I would say to them, well, I'm sorry, you're fucked. That's not going to happen. Then look at me like, what pattern interrupt, right? And I probably should have asked if I could speak freely on your podcast. You can't go ahead too late now. Yeah, too late now. Unless we got some good editing. No, no, no, no, no, no, you have your audience at home. So make sure to put the explicit tag on here. But I say, you know, you guys, you guys are in trouble.

You're not, that's not going to happen. You look at you and like, what do you mean? You helped other fighters to do that. I said, no, the difference between being fearless and being courageous, as fearless as fear doesn't exist. Courageous as you face the fear and say, I'm going to go anyway. Being courageous is a lot different than being fearless. Fearless don't think exists. Courageous is what people need.

And when they go, oh, you mean, I don't have to, I don't have to try to eliminate this feeling of fear No, you have to use it as fuel Fear means you're set up to do something big fear means you're probably in the right place about to do something that is meaningful to you And you don't want to perform you know, you want a performer level where you're gonna where you're gonna succeed Great, so let's take that fear and let's harness it and use it the right way. And part of that is the research that Amy Cutty has done with her book presence come out of Harvard is is you know, fake it till you make it is really fake it till you find it right the difference between power posing and how you when you were big you carry your you increased cortisol your necrestress the whole thing. So one of the applied things that we would do to help them to manage the fear and use it for fuel is we would practice how they're going to walk to the cage. So the morning of the fight, they're fighting at 10 o'clock at night in Vegas at 10 a.m. or in the locker room, very light warm up, but now we're practicing walking from the

locker room down the tunnel out to the cage, getting up in the octagon, going through what they're going to do from a routine standpoint, and practicing the state that they want to get into. And all states are made up of three things. Your body language, your focus, your self-talk. So the body language is the easiest one to correct because you can see it as a coach. Right. We can videotape it, we can go back and literally break down. Here's how you're walking into the cage. So wait, you said body language. Focus. And self-talk. Focus and self-talk are the three things that what? Create your

states. Okay. Create your state. Create your state. So like so like when someone Focus and self-talk or the three things that what create your states, okay? Create your state create your state So like so like when someone walks into a room right if we were to go if we were to go sit in a in a bar or we were to go sit in a Athletic arena right and watch people come walking in you can tell a lot about someone's state simply by the way they carry themselves Absolutely agree with that right so, so as a fitness professional, when you're doing... I love how you keep on calling me a fitness professional, right? When you're doing your personal training, right?

As a coach, and someone comes walking in, you know exactly where they're at, just by the way they're walking into the gym. They're walking in with a smile, with a little bit of juice and energy, or they're walking in with their head down. We're missing, and I'm happy, and I'm happy. Yeah, and you're like, okay, well,

before we're gonna get a workout in today, I'm gonna have to help get their mind right, and then having something to go to to be able to do that. Right. So practicing walking into the cage was part of the body language. The focus piece was simplifying the game plan

to say like, what are your performance ABCs? And we'll use an MMA example, but this is gonna apply to anything. Performance ABCs would be, what are the three things that you have to do today? Trins I have to turn half to into would be, what are the three things you have to do today? Which means I have to turn half to and to want to. What are the three things you want to do today that will give you a best chance to win?

I got to circle off my jab. I have to push the pace of the fight and keep it high tempo because I have better conditioning and I have to take my opponent down. So A, circle off my jab. B, push the pace of the fight. C, take my opponent down.

Bring it to the ground. So like even when I'm doing mental performance coaching and I'm going into say work with Marquette Benz basketball, I'll set my ABCs. A, have great energy. B, you know, talk to the guys about body language. C, be really engaged when I'm there, which means like leave my phone in the car,

don't even bring it into the facility with me. So I have a simple game plan going in and then at the end of the day I look back and go, how do I do it executing those ABCs? And if I executed those ABCs, my focus was probably pretty good, thus my performance was probably pretty good because your focus is going to determine your future. And then self-talk, one of the ways we would train self-talk is I'd say, we'll use George as an example, I'd say George, tell me about the road work, right?

How much running are you gonna do in terms of just cardio? Some guys, it's on a bike, some guys it's running, and so I do 20 minutes a day or whatever, it's okay, good. What do you listen to? I listen to music or listening to nothing. I'm sorry, give me 10 minutes at that time.

Now, I would make an audio with usually like instrumental music in the background, and I would say things that I want him to repeat to himself. So affirmations. Exactly. You know, I call them confidence conditioning statements or affirmations. So you're a big believer in affirmations. As part of the...

I'm a believer that you can train self-talk and have something to go to because I'm a believer that you don't rise the occasion. You sink to your training in habits. If you're not training self-talk, you're missing an opportunity to have specific self-talk that you want in performance. Okay, so I think affirmation... You hesitated, though, and I said... Well, because I don't really like the word affirmations, because I think that too many

times there's motivational speakers or these self-help gurus, or like, I want you to read these affirmations about I make $10 million a year, and I do this, and I think that too many times there's motivational speakers or these, you know, self-help gurus are like, I want you to read these affirmations about, I make 10 million dollars a year and I do this and I do that. And it's like, that's just, that's just like a piece of the puzzle. Right. That's not the whole thing, you know? Right. So, I call it incentive. I call confidence conditioning statements, but essentially it's affirmations, right? It's self-talk, it's, it's generating the self-talk that you want intentionally and listening to it all the time

so that when you talk to yourself, that's what you say. So like when you're running, how many times will you go for a run and you start singing a song that you've listened to recently? I know, to give me, to kind of pump me up, to pump you up, right? Yeah, you're seeing a song. Over and over and over and over.

I used to do this, I still, like, I've been listening to the same songs like for the last four years. And some songs, of course, you get bored of, but you do have your go-to that just kind of keep you pumped up and make you feel confident, right? Yeah, and you can probably dial up those songs without even having to hit your iPod

and do it in your own mind, right? Absolutely. So one of the things that we would do is take, take, for example, as a UFC fighter, they're gonna walk to the cage to a song. Stop touching the thing. Yeah, you're gonna stop doing this? Yeah.

Is this a problem? I try to tell them, yes, okay. Because you're gonna, all I wanna hear is boom, like. Yeah. Is it going to make it out? Is this better? Perfect, thank you. Yes, that's way better.

Is this awkward? Yeah, not awkward for me, but. So when you're, when you're, let me refocus here. Yeah. When we're talking about, you know, self-talking and affirmation training, okay, I'll do it over here. Thank you. Right, is, is we would take a highlight video.

So I take a highlight video of a fighter with getting takedowns and winning fights, whatever it is. And, and executing the way I want to execute. And I would put that highlight video to the song that they're gonna walk to the KH2. And then I would take words of affirmation or song that they're gonna walk to the KH2. And then I would take words of affirmation or confidence finishing statements

and I put them on the screen. The things they've been listening to in the radio. So when they watch that video, which they would do every day for like six weeks leading up to the fight. And then I would say close your eyes, they close your eyes, listen to the video, I'd pause the video and say what's on the screen?

Oh, I just got to take down again, so on and so on, on top of landing an elbow. So the image is now basically embedded in their mind So when they go walking to the cage and they hear that song, what are the images that are going through their mind? Everything that they saw in the high video So that it's almost like Training them to have such a strong self-belief and conference or a self-image in terms of being able to see themselves execute the way They want to that when they hear that song

It just is like a trigger if you understand habits habits and how to understand that, the habit loop, right? Trigger, routine, reward. Yeah. That the trigger is when I hear that song, the routine is, I see all these images in my mind of me performing the way I want to, which helps me with my body language, locks in my focus and my self-doc is that I'm the baddest dude out there and I'm going to go get it.

Right. That's exactly it. Yeah. Okay. And then that sound, okay, I like that. That's obviously, that does, that does work because we all exactly it. Yeah. Okay, and then that's not okay. I like that. That's obviously, that does work because we all do it. Yeah, it works especially in the clientele, like, where professional athletes where I spend a lot of spaces,

you have video of those guys, like my corporate clients. I don't actually have video of those guys. But also, I know you don't normally have, but for a regular person, I think to which, to like visualize to a sort of what you want to do, for fitness, if you're trying to lose weight or do just think it's good to visualize where you want to be. But and then have a plan to work towards. But having like, I think an affirmation of what you call confidence conditions is affirmation is the same thing.

And they all work in tandem with other things. But I like what you said earlier to me off line about the staircase, right? Because more than just having a goal, but it's having those steps at the top of the, well, I'm not doing it justice. It's a process. It's a process. Everything is a process. Everything is a process.

Everything is a process. Everything is a process. Everything is a process. Everything is a process. Everything is a process. Everything is a process. Everything is a process. Everything is a process. Everything is a process. Everything is a process. Everything is a process. Everything is a process. Everything is a choice. It's not, so isn't that kind of a faking until you make it?

Like you're choosing to be confident. You're choosing to kind of put yourself out there in a world where you have your body language, when your presence is confident and self assured, doesn't that help get kind of like dictate your next, like your, your, your, your, basically how you're presenting yourself is part of it to get to where you want to be in a certain way. Big part of it. Yeah. Big part of it because your physiology is going to affect your psychology. And your psychology will affect your physiology. It's like a two lane super highway between your body and your mind. So if you walk around like you're right, if I walk around and sit down like this, all of a sudden, how's my energy gonna be?

Right. Through the floor. How's my mind second to be? Through the floor. How's my confidence gonna be? Not existent. So people, and I get to, the conversation that I have the most probably with my clients, or at least at the beginning,

is they're like, man, I just don't have confidence today. Like a major league baseball hiter, man, I lost my confidence. You lost your confidence? Shit, let's look underneath this lemon. Maybe it's there. You know? Maybe it's underneath that cup my confidence. You lost your confidence. Shit, let's look underneath this lemon. Maybe it's there. You know, maybe it's underneath that cup. You lose your confidence, you're choosing to give it away.

Confidence is a choice. Confidence is a state. What are states made up of? Body language, focus, and self-talk. Now preparation can, we'll help you with your confidence. Like if you haven't done the work, and this is where, this is where I think a lot of people can be confused by like,

the secret method, right? The secret method. Oh, yeah, you told me that. Sit and visualize and it'll come true. No, you have to do a lot of the work. You have to go, you have to go and invest in the preparation. Separation is in preparation. Who are you going to bet on?

The person who's most prepared, right? So, but if you're, if both people are equally prepared who then is gonna win Who's got more to go to I think what mental performance does is in under extreme stress It gives you something to go to and my friends that are you know special operators or Navy seals that get into mental performance mastery And when they get out of the seal teams and they're like there's a bad ass ass as I've ever seen Yeah, and it's like, what's similar between what I'm teaching these athletes in these CEOs around mental performance mastery and that you did in the seal teams?

I mean, they look at it and they're like, man, we did all this. And I had a friend of mine, Jason Koon, who was a former seal team operator and is now running a group called Stonewall Solutions where he goes in and does education around mindset and leadership, fascinating. You gotta give us a guess, Jason Koon.

Jason Koon, you know, I've heard of him before. Fascinating. You got to give us a guess. Jason Koon, you know, I've heard of him before. He's like a well-known Navy SEAL. Yeah, there's a lot of speaking and was it was, we got connected because he was a former college baseball player. Really? Yeah, former college baseball player that didn't professional career, didn't work out and he decided it'd go be a SEAL.

How about that? And then his roommate and buds, he got named Sean Haggardy from the selection down in San Diego has become a buddy mind But anyway, those guys have both said they're like look what what the reason why seals are able to do what they do is six words relentless fundamental execution under extreme stress. Yeah, and I think ultimately if both people are as prepared and stress. Yeah. And I think ultimately if both people are as prepared and they go into a situation in an athletic situation whether it be a fight, whether it be a pitcher-hitter confrontation, whether it be two people pointing against each other in tennis, whatever it is, or two companies going to try to get the same deal, the same contract, who's going to have more skills to go to,

who's going to have more something to go to when this should hits the fan under stress, because it's going to hit the fan. Right. Do Navy SEALs use mental performance coaches? They must. Yeah, I mean, I've not myself been into, you know, I've been in the Coronado. I've never gone in and worked with SEALs in Coronado, but I know that they do have people that go in and do it.

Well, because everything is mental, like all the physical, I always say that the physical is the easy part. But if you get your mind right, if you your mind right, the physical, it comes easily. Like it's changing your behavior, it's changing the way you think, the way you focus, all these other things is what is the work. The other stuff is much easier to kind of, that's at the byproduct after all. So that's why I would be surprised if they don't use people like you. I'm sure you use you. I would be surprised if they don't use people like you. I'm sure you use you. Talk to Jason Kuhn about that.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, I'm sure they have, you know, they have, they have mental skills training for sure. I was just speaking with a friend of mine as an athletic director at a university and assistant athletic director who's a former Navy pilot for 20 years. And he talked about how the,

and he was going through the mental performance mastery certification. And so where the conversation started was like, what are, what did you use in the Navy as a fighter pilot on combat missions overseas that was in mental performance masteries like all of it. He goes, you know, when you're in eight hour mission and 25 minutes into the mission and one of your co-pilots, you know, one of your planes is up there flying with you, gets blown up by a missile and you've got another seven and a half hours to fly that mission. How do you compartmentalize that loss and be able to still go and fight and execute and do what you have to do? So one of the skills that I don't talk about a ton in the book or in the certification program compartmentalization is like everyone's got shit.

The difference between professional and amateur is they're professional can have all this chaos going on around them and once time to go, they're still able to go and be clear. They'll basically take everything that they have and go, you know what, this is not necessary for me to focus on right now. Let me throw it in a box, let me put it over here

and let me go take care of business. When business is done, I'll come back to this box and I'll address what's inside of it. They can compartmentalize. compartmentalize for sure. Yeah. So like with people that wear a uniform, nurses, police officers, operators, athletes,

it's like when you put the uniform on, you separate the who and the do. So when you put in the uniform on, it's go time. And when the uniform comes off, like you download, you flip the switch down you're putting the uniform on, it's go time. And when the uniform comes off, like you download, you flip the switch down, you turn the intensity down, and you go back and you be just a regular human being. But when the uniform is on, you can't afford to be regular. You can't have normal feelings. You can't have normal thoughts. You have to be elite. And that's different than what's walking around on the streets every single

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Then how, like, you put together as a great, I mean, I'm doing it as we speak, the mental performance, mastery program. It's like, it's great, and I'm not just saying that because you're sitting here is because it really is like legit and great. And I don't think it's something that is only for people who are high achievers. I think any like person, normal person, game back to the North, couldn't really benefit from it from the everyday life. But like they get your mind right. So how like that's like you do a lot of work on that and how did you like how long did it take you to put that thing together? Let's see the guys written 42 books by the way, okay? This is no joke, okay? The guys are in 42 books. So talk about someone who's an overachiever

Right over here. I'm not gonna take me put together the mental forms mastery certification Yeah, let's see it came out when I was 40 and 40 and probably two months. So it probably took me 40 years and two months to put it together. It's probably it's my life's work. It's it's fantastic. You know, and I think it all started probably with like my high school football coach when I was a freshman in high school. The first guy who probably not intentionally just was what he was doing, started hanging up quotes in a locker room.

It's not the size of the dog of the fight. It's the size of the fight in the dog. Some college football coach said that. He wrote it down, put it up on the wall. I still remember that. I was a kid who was a freshman in high school. At the end of the year, when he was taking all those things down off the bulletin board, he was going to throw them away.

I said, hey, can I take that stuff? Really? I hung it up in my room, back home. And it was like the start of it, you know? The start of, there's a mental component to it. Because that was never the biggest, the fastest, the strongest. Right. You know, you should have something to go to.

And I think that thing to go to was mindset. And there was never any formal training on it. And what I've tried to do is like take it from the clouds, right? Take it from the clouds of Mindset and leadership and make it more tangible and throw in the dirt So we can play with it. You know myself. I was thinking I was faking the table Throw in the dirt so we can play with it. You know throw in the dirt so that we can like make it tangible so that we can grow so anyone anyone make it tangible so that we can grow. So anyone, anyone from, from says, I mean, some of the best mental performance coaching sessions I've ever had are with like nine-year-old, nine- and ten-year-olds.

Yeah, what are you doing with the nine-year-old? Talking about routines and habits and consistency. Right, that it could just start young. You want to be, you want to train their brain at a young age. Yeah. Yeah. I mean, even a nine-year-old on a little league baseball team, there's an element of leadership because people are looking at them people are looking up to them And if if anyone is counting on you for anything that's what quantifies you as a leader So if you're nine years old and you have teammates that are counting on you that makes you a leader Right and can they trust you and if you think about trust is like a triangle right the trust triangle If you have trust is a triangle and there's three sides to it like what is leadership?

Essentially leadership in urban Meyer talks about this in his book above the line the formal house date florida football coach as he he says that trust is to or leadership is two things it's building trust and it's getting results right leadership is influence where people are going to you're going to build the influence people and they're going to follow you but they're not going to follow you if you don't get results right and and when i was 240 pounds and trying to be a mental performance coach, it wasn't a good 240. And I my mentor at the University of Vermont, Declan Connolly, right, is exercise physiologist and he works with a ton of Olympic athletes and New York Rangers. Remember I hadn't come out to the

school that I was working at to speak to parents and to our coaches just about exercise physiology. He's like, well, Mr. Kane, when I come up there, we'll go for a run. He's like, I hope you got your running shoes. I hope you're in shape. I'm training for the siren man. We're gonna go get a little get to exercise physiology. He's like, well, Mr. Kane, when I come up there, we'll go for a run. He's like, I hope you got your running shoes. I hope you're in shape. I'm training for the siren man. We're gonna go get a little bit of running. I'm like, oh, no problem. Let's do it.

I couldn't run a mile. And he looks at me. He goes, Mr. Kane, leaders are not fat. Because if you want to have influence and impact over people and you want these high achievers and people to listen to the words that you're saying, they're never gonna get past the fact that you're wearing a 44 inch waist right now.

That's what he said to you. Yeah. And I was like, damn. And it was exactly what I needed to hear. And I've used that line many times with people. Leaders aren't fat. You want to know why your kids aren't performing for you? High school football coach, because you're fat.

They don't respect you. They're looking up to you right now. They're going to get in big trouble for this right now. they're going to get in big trouble for this right now. But you know what? No one else is saying it and it's true. And the people that I've said that to, and I know it's not probably politically correct. No, but say this is your opinion. But the people that I have shared that with, not all of them, because not everybody wants to hear the truth. But the people wouldn't hear that listen into this and it hurts them. They probably hurt, it hurts because they know it. It hurts because they know that they've

allowed themselves to get in that situation. And that, and that was me. And then you start making, okay, well, how did I get in this way? How did I get to this position? Well, I stopped taking care of myself because I was thinking I was taking care of everybody else, but really what I was doing is I'm giving the world my be game. No one wants your fucking be game. So take care of yourself. Get yourself into a better level of fitness. And with that comes a better level of focus because fitness and focus are tied together. That's what I was going to say. That's what I think a very true point. And I'm a big believer in that. We had someone else on earlier today, but

that there's a major major connection between fitness and cognitive focus and performance. 100% like what and we're examples of this. When I work, when I don't work out, I am less productive, less focused, less alert period and a story. That's it. Totally. And one worse, and one they're interchangeable. You need one to get to be your highest level productive to productivity, focus, and having your cognitive functions working at a very

primary level. It's true. 100% and it's proven with research. It's proven with research. It's not just my opinion or your opinion. This is actually proven. Yes. And they're taking phys ed out of schools across the country. Absolutely. Most schools don't even have phys ed anymore. Right. And no schools have were teaching mental performance. But what do you think you'd use more? General, do you think what do you think that I agree with you? What would Sydney use more? How to focus, how to have self-control and discipline, how to create routines and habits, how to manage your time, or Latin? No, I'm saying, but we teach Latin in school. You're preaching to the converted. And I think also, especially with technology, people are getting more and more lazy, which

is affecting their cognitive functioning ability, because they're relying on just like, that, that, like pressing a button, sorry, crazy, pressing a button, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, not moving, not, that, that, that, that, that, that, there's a big thing between getting your blood circulating, having your brain working and moving. Also, when you exercise and move, you think usually while you're doing it, you get your best ideas and best thoughts for that stuff. So I'm a believer. So I'd often interrupt you.

You have the floor. Go back. Where were we? Oh God. I remember. I was just kidding. So he says that to me, right? And it leaders aren't fat.

And put it correctly or not, it's the truth. And in my experience. And when I've said that to people... We're not talking big bone people. We're not talking about people who are, you know, big... We're talking about people you're saying who have like a live subcutaneous... Yeah, we're talking about the football coach who walks in and has got low energy sits down, the guts hanging over the pants. And sitting there with a chin falling down and he's sitting there and he's like, wow, my kids don't, my kids don't compete

hard. I also think you lead by an example. I think people lead by an example. Yes. People, especially if you're a leader, you lead by an example. And unfortunately, perception sometimes is reality, right? Totally. It's, you know by an example. And unfortunately, perception sometimes is reality, right? Totally. It's, you know, people always say to me, well, I want my trainer, my personal trainer to look really fit, because that's your model of what, right?

Would you go to a doctor at the smoke? Would you go to a poor financial planner? Well, that's what I'm saying. That's what I'm saying. People have to play a role and play a part to be successful at it. So I don't think this is meant to be insulting. It's meant to be like honest.

It's meant to be alarming. Yeah. To say, whoa, wait a minute, maybe he's talking to me. Maybe I ought to start, instead of taking the small decisions that are taking me away from where I want to be, let me flip it by making small decisions to get to where I want to be. And that small decision might be ditch the soda and get into water. A small decision might be ditch the soda and get into water.

Small decision might be instead of waiting to get the parking space as close to the front door as possible, as possible, park as far away as you can. Right. So it's small changes, equal big wins. Totally. Excellence in small things becomes excellence in all things. And it's a continuum. What is that?

Excellence in small things becomes excellence in all things. Yeah. And it's like the energy cycle. I agree. Right? And if you're, if you call it, bring in the juice, man, and if you're juiceful, you're useful. And if you're juiceless, you're pretty much useless to everybody else. And the energy cycle is the more energy that you give to other people, the more energy

you're going to have, the more energy you have, the more energy you have to give away. What does that mean? You have more energy, and it becomes a beautiful cycle. Yeah. But it goes the other way too. It goes the other way that if you don't have energy and you can't give energy to other people, you don't have any more energy to give because you're not getting ery loaded. So all of that goes in the wrong direction as well.

So it's, you know, and I don't mean to upset anybody. I don't mean. But you're speaking your truth. It's my, I'm sharing my experience and that one line for me changed my life. No, absolutely. And like I said, I believe that people have to lead by an example, not just in that with anything in life they have to lead by an example. People thought just words, it's action, it's looking what you do and then me emulating

what you do. Like why am I a big fan and believe reviews? Because you walk the walk and you talk the talk. So it makes me much more motivated and inspired to do something, right? Like to live my life that way because I see what you're doing and I'm like, wow, that's amazing. If you can do it, I can do it.

Hey, man. Well, that's the thing. And I think that's that way with anybody. Yeah, that's what I think. And as we look at, it's like like leaders, leaders are readers, right? And as you read about other people and what they've achieved and what they do, you look at and go, if they can do it, so can I.

And a lot of times what you get from reading is you get from like looking at, you know, at strong as the new sexier, you look at the different books that you've been reading. You mean strong as the skinny? Because everybody can be strong. No. I'm good at goal, but not everyone can be skinny. He

just said my my book title wrong everybody. It's really nice. Did I say strong is the new skinny? Because I know you say strong is the new sexy. No, it's strong. You just said it again. I know. Yeah, no, what I'm saying here, Jen, you're not listening. Uh-oh. You're not listening. So you're listening to respond instead of listening to understand. And what I said is it's strong is the new sexy. Do you want to be skinny or do you want to be sexy? I don't want to be skinny, but I'd love to be sexy. So strong is the new sexy. You would have sold a lot more books

if that was your title. I know, stop, I know, next time. Maybe my fourth book will be strong is the new sexy. Maybe I'll do that. Because, I mean, nobody wants to be skinny. Do you want to be skinny? No, that's my point. But you want to be sexy.

You missed the point of book of the book title. Strong. Yeah. Do you want to be skinny? No, that's my point. But you want to be sexy. You missed the point of the book title. Strong is the new skinny, which means, no, that's my whole point. Skinny is a goal that is sometimes very unattainable and it's not, it means nothing. Everyone could be strong, which means mentally strong and physical is strong. But people want to be sexy.

Okay, so she'd be called sexy is the new skinny. Strong is the new sexy. Okay, strong is the new sexy. Listen, we just dropped this and go into bad ass articles, my other book, which is much more relevant. No, I'm joking. I'm telling you my fourth book, I'll call it that. Awesome.

Okay, the way we're about you in your life. Oh yeah, are you weighing all black at the Steve Jobs thing? Ah, yes. As I was waiting to come on your show and I was looking through your library I noticed that you had this Steve Jobs autobiography and one of the things that Steve Jobs talks about is you were all black and the reason Why is it's less decisions to make so I converted to be all black? You know is when you it compared to all black because it's less decisions. What are you gonna wear black? You know, so if I go buy a pair of black pants at Lululemon or whatever, I'll get the same like four pairs

You and I you know great minds think alike. I'm a big believer in that too I also think eating the same things every day, which I know is what you do exactly what I did You go from 240 to 190 was eat the same thing every day Absolutely It'll never make the thought process. Yeah, it opens up more mental energy to focus on other things that are more important Like what am I gonna eat? I want make that decision, set it, and forget it, and eat the same thing until I can't stomach anymore, and then try to find something else.

Okay, so what do you eat every day? Well, it depends. When I started back, when I became aware that I was not living what I was teaching, by my mentor, Declan Connelly, thank you for saying that, Doc, if you're listening to this, is I basically got on macro nutrition without even knowing it right so very basic Fitness is a cow or three thirty five hundred calories is like a pound. Okay. This was missed was where my logic was and I said okay

three five hundred calories is a pound and if I'm at a deficit of a thousand calories a day Then over the course of a week give or take maybe I'll at a deficit of a thousand calories a day, then over the course of a week, give or take, maybe I'll lose a pound a week. Because I'm never gonna exactly know how much calories I've earned. I'll probably never know exactly how many calories I brought in. But if I'm trying to be the deficit of a thousand a day, I'll try to lose a pound a week. So literally it was like, I'd have the same grapefruit,

an apple, and carrots, and a peanut butter joint sandwich, and two bananas, and five hard boiled eggs, and then whatever it was, and a thing of almonds, and that was it, and that's what I ate every single day. Is your major sugar for? Maybe in a previous life. That's gonna say, it sounds like me a little bit. Yeah, but now I'm now, and then I've got more educated, right?

And the coach I work with has said, you know, here's macrointrician, and macrointrician is based off of a formula with your body weight, and what your goals are if you're trying to increase muscle mass or you're trying to do body recon or get fat loss. I use the formula, and basically what I eat is 52 grams of fat, 185 grams of carb,

and 240 grams of protein. And then there's a little bit of variance and they're depending on what I'm doing from a training standpoint, like if it's a long day and I'm doing, because I'm training for this 100 mile race, right? If I'm doing like a seven hour training session that day, I'm obviously going to add on more probably around 300 calories an hour based off of what I'm trying to train, but I'm trying to get leaner because when you're going that long, you know, I'm trying to just be as light as I can without losing a ton of muscle. Right. So Brian said to me in a few text messages and the schedule.

So he's going to go, we're going to, I'll do your podcast and at this time, to this time, and then we can just go for a quick 14 mile run. Just one mile, 14 times. 14 mile. I was like, did I read that correctly? Like five miles. Okay. I get six miles with your buddy, Eric. He made me run 11 miles. I thought that he was nuts and then you come with 40. That's like you're basically at like almost more than a half a marathon. That's like a two and a half hour run just for shits and giggles

basically. Yeah so it's because it's part of the process. But also you said that and because you're training you already did three hours of what biking today Just morning. It was a bike weights and just kind of movement like a yoga type of stretch deal Oh, okay, so and then as you're waiting to come on the podcast you did a hundred dips and a hundred pushups in your kitchen You had his waiting because I looked and I saw your book no gym required. Yeah, you got the name I got right because I said it well. I was gonna get I would got inspired Okay, thank you. When inspiration hits sometimes you have to take massive action Because the time is always now so I got inspired to take it because I wanted I wanted I wanted to be sexy

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Ultimate summer path, energy savings and results so cool. FIXU energy, energy for everything. Captain Banner now to learn more. So basically, also, you just don't like to waste any time. Like, I'm sitting here waiting, like, you know, for the next three minutes, I might as well have, like, you know, crank out another hundred squats, and a hundred push ups, and a hundred pull ups.

Yeah, and time is life, you're right. And there's one thing, the one thing we're not getting more of. Do you get more money, you can get more money, you can get more friends, you can get more fame, you can't get more time. Absolutely. So if you don't value, that's the thing that is like, I don't understand why not everybody schedules their day like that. It's hard with kids.

What do you do if you have kids? How can you schedule a day like that? It's all great and fine in theory and even in practicality to some to some extent. I'm a believer, obviously, I'm doing your program. And these are all the same. We share the same philosophies. But shit gets in the way. Sure. Like kids, like family, like whatever else. How do you schedule your day so regimentally for the average Joe to get that

Sure, so you start you start with structure and then what would Trump's structure is your ability to compensate and adjust you can't you can't be the perfectionist that has to live in this box And I have to do this at that time and I have to that then become neurotic right and life's not really fun because you're living off of a Schedule right, but you have the schedule to keep you productive. Right. I get that. And then you compensate in just a matter of five. You modify.

Yeah, based off of what life is going to throw you. And life is going to throw you a whole heck of a lot on a daily basis. But don't go into a day without a plan because what if life doesn't throw you any curveballs at that? Right. Not productive. Absolutely. And if you're not productive and you're not giving your best to the world, what are you

doing? You're not living, you're just existing. I agree with you. Who would you say you look up to? And what's your favorite book? My favorite book was Heads Up Baseball by Ken Ravista. That book that one day, I picked it up, that book changed my life completely. Completely, I'm an example of how one day

One book one person can completely change its trajectory of your life Okay, so the one day was that guy the one the one day was July 4th 2000 walking into Barnes and Noble The one book was heads at baseball the one guy was my mentor Dr. Kenra Visa. Yeah, Kenra Visa right what was it? Why that book? It just spoke to me probably the right book at the right time what message was in that book control Which you can control the rest of the bullshit. So that was the one statement that made a difference. Control what you can control. Yeah, I ask people the million dollar question and I'd like to flip this podcast around.

Now, Jen, I ask you the million dollar question, which the million dollar question is this. What do you know now that you would go, you wish you knew then, right? And you can fill in the blank for then. That was my rapid fire question for you. Perfect. Well, I answer it for you because for me, it's control what you can fill in the blank for then. That was my rapid fire question for you. Perfect. Well, I answered for you. Because for me, it's control, which you can control on the rest of this bullshit. Because if you can't control it, don't give it any time. Because it's a waste of time. If you can influence it, focus on what you need to do to influence

it, which is usually something that you can control. I'm actually learning that message, that not philosophy right now, because the older I get and the more seasoned I get, I'm learning that I put too much energy into things that I cannot control. And I work myself up and I get so much anxiety and I get angry and frustrated. And like at the end of the day, there's nothing I can do with things that I can't do anything about. Wasted time and energy. Wasted time and energy. And, you know, only to control the things you can and sometimes it's so you know I think that you you were it's a very it's easy to kind of not relax the wrong word but it's your head becomes in a better place once you kind of acknowledge that is the case and then

is the truth but I'm not there yet I have to be honest with you. Sure. But like it is a work in progress but I am learning that message more and more and more. Yeah, well, when you're superwoman, sometimes you think you can control things, you can't control when you can influence everything, you know? Right. Superwoman, that's right. Which is a strength, right?

Right. But the understanding of what I can control, what I can't control, what I can influence. And that's probably the number one mental game skill, mental performance skill that when you talk to athletes, whether it be George or other people that have gone through this program, they'll often come back and go, it helped me get clarity on what I could control and what I couldn't control. And when I gave up the things I couldn't control and chose to invest my time energy and focus on the things I could control, I started to see changes.

And when they saw those changes, then it becomes a cycle. I see the effort I'm putting in, I'm getting a better result. I get excited, I want to put more effort in, I get more result, I get more excitement, I start going in that direction. Like our, you know, our mutual friend Eric Burns would say that the pivotal... I hope he lists this to this episode,

we've spoken to him about it. He'll listen to it on a run somewhere, probably in the deep desert of Arizona, but on the pivotal point of his career, he said the turning point of his career was sitting down with a mental performance coach at a breakfast. The mental performance coach had known him for their relationship previously. He called him and said, Eric, you're not performing the way you want to.

You're not performing at the level you're capable of, let's get together. And he literally took out a napkin and And he wrote down on one side the things you could control, on the other side the things he couldn't control. Eric said that day changed his career. He said he would have been out of baseball if he didn't have that napkin. Eric Burns was major league baseball.

I tell you, your plus major league baseball player, and working for the major league baseball network right now, just an icon of an athlete. He went from a baseball sport, which is a power, a long run in baseball, would be 180 feet from home to second base. And now he's literally doing a triathlon across the country, you know, in the summer of 2018, where he swam from San Francisco to Oakland, rode his bike from Oakland to Chicago and ran from Chicago to New York.

No, he's superhuman. Yeah. And he's now an ultra marathoner. I remember, like, I was like a machine beyond machine. So that's exactly right. So he had the same method, basically the same thing that you had, the control, what you can control. And a lot of things on Eric was a baseball player.

And that was my background. And I think a lot of times in that sport, there's so many things you can not control. Once you accept, I can't control it. Let me choose to go here, stress disappears. Stress minimizes, I should say. I would say never disappears. Never disappears.

Minimizes, it minimizes. And you become more productive. And you have more fun playing the game because you're focused on things that actually you can influence. Wow, that's cool. But it's the same way in life But it's the same way in life. The same way in life.

Where does most of the stress come from people in life? I'm focusing on things they cannot. That's what I'm saying. That's my big work. That's my big work is because my cortisol, I can feel my cortisol levels raising with all the shit that I cannot control. And it becomes like a vicious spiral of, of like stress and anxiety.

When, you know, it's like a necessary because there's nothing you can do at the end of the day. Anyway, right? So I mean, I agree with you. That's a good, that's a good message though. That's a good, that's a, it's probably the most important. I mean, if you're asking me the million dollar question, what do I know now? I wish I knew then it would be control what you can control that go with the rest. And I think this ties along with what we're talking about is that a lot of times when people

feel like anxiety, they're not clinically diagnosed with anxiety, but everyone will say, oh man, I get anxious about certain things speaking or whatever, right? Is anxiety comes from obsessing about what's going to happen in the future. Depression, I should have done this, what it could have, comes from obsessing about what happened in the past. Optimal performance comes from obsessing about what you're doing right here right now in the moment being where your feet are. And when you have that type of focus where your feet are continually, that's living life at a high level, man. You're making the big time where you are. You know, so I think if there's a message that can quickly, positively impact the lives of the people that are listening to this, it's let go of the past because it's going

to employ you down. Let go of the future because it's going to make you anxious and worry out and just dial in on what you're doing right here right now. And if you don't know what to do, take out a piece of paper or take out your phone, open up a Google Doc and look at the rest of the time you have today and make a schedule. And if you don't know what to do with your schedule, just take what time you want to go to sleep and start there.

And if you want to go to sleep at 10 o'clock tonight and it's five o'clock right now, write down five to 10, free time, 10 sleep. Start there, because it's the start to stop most people. Exactly through. It's the start that stops most people. And they gotta get momentum on their side, right? They gotta get it started.

What's they get it started? And they're in it all of a sudden now, it's like that merry go round, right? When you're, I don't even know if they have merry go rounds right now because it's probably, there's probably too much liability for the city that has the merry go round, right? But if you're on a merry go round

and you have to work really hard to get it going, but once you get it going, you can just flip it with a finger. Right. Life is all about momentum. Everything's momentum driven. That's why I think that's so true. The start is always the most difficult thing to get in any program or anything in life. But once you start, you have the momentum.

It's very easy to stay on track then or stay on path. Yeah, right? Yeah, and you generate your own momentum. And you generate your own momentum. You make momentum with your mindset. Now, you make momentum with what you do on a daily basis. Don't be waiting for someone else. Don't be waiting for the moon and the stars to align to go, oh, now I'm ready. I have momentum. No, get started. Right. And then what do you say, how do they, how do they get started when that's the hardest thing? Start small with that little schedule. Yeah start start with with writing down one thing What time it is now and what time you're gonna go to bed and write down free time? Anybody can do that. Yeah, right now and then once they do that you build once you do that

Then they'll probably go oh well. I wrote down what time I'm gonna go to bed tonight. What do you think next? What time am I gonna wake up tomorrow? What am I going to do in that wake up? Here comes my morning routine, right? And the morning routine gets started. And then all of a sudden you get a little bit of momentum on your side and that starts creeping into your day. And next thing you know, you put together a quality day. And if you have a quality morning that leads to a quality day, quality day leads to a quality week, quality week leads to a quality month, quality quarter, quality year, quality life. Get started in the morning. Wow.

Well, with that, I want to leave because that's a really good point. That's a good point. I don't want to. That's a good one. That's a good way to end. So tell people, Brian, if they want more little nuggets of info from you, which I think you have a ton of, where would people find you? Probably go to strong as the newsexy.com notes.

If they go to brinacane.com, B-R-I-A-N-C-A-I-N. Okay. B-R-I-N-C-A-I-N.com. Okay. On Instagram, Twitter, Brian Cain, peak, PEAK, but the people that are listening to this, that are personal trainers, that are coaches, that are that are listening to this that are that are personal trainers that are coaches that are parents if they're looking for

Ace the 10 pillars in the skill sets to develop in people that are looking to them for mentorship Or if you're working with clients athletes corporate people whatever it is then the mental performance master certification Would be the place to go because then you're gonna get the exact how to and when to of building those 10 pillars and that mental performance. And I'm doing it right now guys and it is great. I actually am really enjoying it and I'm learning a lot and it's, it dubtails beautifully with any kind of goal you're trying to achieve in life. So I highly recommend it and that's why I'm so thrilled. Like just like genuinely thrilled that you're here.

Oh, it's been fun. I've enjoyed it. It's been, I don't know how long that was but it went by. I have no idea. That fast. How long has's been fun. I've enjoyed it. I don't know how long that was, but it went by. I have no idea. That fast. How long has it been? I usually ask that anyway, but.

I don't love men. Oh, I love men. Okay. That's a long way. It's one minute, 71 times. Yeah. Wow. Yeah.

It's like this run where botto go do. It's one mile, 14. Uh oh. Uh oh. Everyone just, you know, pray for me. All right, guys. Thank you, Brian. Thank you. It's been fun.

Thank you. Bye. Bye. Bye. Bye. Bye. I hope you enjoyed this episode. I'm Heather Monahan, host of Creating Confidence, a part of the YAP Media Network, the number

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