Habits and Hustle - Episode 238: Can You Really Manifest Your Way To Success?
Episode Date: May 5, 2023Do you believe in manifestation? In this solo episode of Habits and Hustle, we chat about how some components of manifestation are helpful in one’s self-development journey, while others are detrim...ental. Too many people fall into the trap of believing that their thoughts alone can bring them riches - but the reality is that thoughts don’t do the work for you - only you can. What we discuss: 01:28: Does manifestation work? 03:58: Do we overestimate how much control we have? 08:24: Is manifesting self-care? 10:02: Is the coaching industry giving manifesting a bad wrap? 14:40: How can you avoid getting scammed by a coach in this industry? Key takeaways: There is value in visualizing yourself achieving success, but these thoughts are not enough to experience success in real life. You must put in the work and take action. Manifestation has become an industry of its own, where coaches have taken over and are preying on people who may want to believe that their thoughts alone can give them everything they desire. Manifestation discards the fact that you are never 100% in control of external factors. The reality is that certain things are far beyond your control and you can’t manifest your way out of it. My links: Website: https://www.jennifercohen.com/ Instagram: @therealjencohen Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
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I guys just Tony Robbins, you're listening to Habits and Hustles.
Crescent.
All right, welcome to another episode of Habits and Hustles solo edition.
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Ready?
Today's topic could be maybe a little controversial
because we're gonna be talking and exploring a topic
that I think is probably the most popular self-help trend
that I've ever seen.
And that is manifestation.
And the ideas behind manifestation,
what my belief system is around it, and all the things.
So, what do you believe in manifestation and just the idea
of that whole trend?
I like some aspects of manifestation,
and I dislike some other aspects of them.
Okay.
I think it's important to believe things and will them into existence to a certain degree,
like you have to really have that belief system to back you up, but I don't think that it's,
yeah, I mean, I think that there's like a lot to discuss in the topic, but I do think
that to an extent having a strong set of beliefs and that confidence and sort of that self-talk is very important.
So this is what I believe, if I do say so myself.
I think that manifestation is a big, big umbrella lofty term.
I don't think that it means it's not being pessimistic
over optimistic.
I think that people value manifestation way more than probably they should.
This is my, by the way, this again is my opinion.
You don't have to agree with it, you don't have to like it.
It's just what I feel and believe.
I believe this idea of, I'll say this, what I like about it.
I like the fact that it puts the onus on the person a little bit, but not enough.
So I guess that's not what I, I guess I like and just like that.
I think that when you only visualize something
and not put it into practice by putting work into it,
it means nothing.
I think that too many people are thinking
that if they think about something, that it's going to happen.
So this idea of mind over matter,
it is true, in my opinion, to an extent.
But I think what it does do is it sometimes makes the person
have feeling that if something doesn't work,
like if they're not taking into account psychological issues,
socio-economic issues, lots of other things.
So just willing something to happen is not enough.
You have to put in the effort, the work, and sometimes
it's struggle to get to what you want.
And so I actually, I'm not a fan.
I'm not a fan of how it's overtaken everything
in personal development and self-help.
And it's the biggest thing since sliced bread.
But I think a lot of the people who talk about manifestation
do acknowledge that.
They say you have to actually go out and do all of these things
It's not just simply about like thinking about it. You can't I mean, that's just so not realistic
But I mean obviously there are some woo ha's out there who do just literally say that
But I think for the most part the mass market and the people who really talk about like the coaches and those who but by the way
The coaching world is something that I'm not a crazy fan of either
But I do often see them saying like you know
It's a balance you have to manifest it. I don't see I don't see most people talking about that
I think a lot of people overestimate our agency and what how we can control the external world
I think we can control to a certain extent
But I don't think that we have the ability. We're not superhuman and we're not superheroes.
I think that what actually is realistic is we can try
and put positive energy somewhere and positive belief
and have a mind over matter, but not put all our eggs
in that basket because I think that is actually
quite harmful, right?
And I don't see a lot of experts saying,
oh yeah, all you need to do is visualize something
and then also work on it.
Because then that's actually contrary
to the whole overall idea of what manifestation is.
Because manifestation's been around for many, many,
many, many, many years.
Like I think a long time, I think the 19th century
is what I read a long time ago.
The idea, I guess, behind it is that your thoughts become
things, and every thought has a vibration and a frequency,
right?
Right.
Like your thoughts become actions.
Your thoughts become real.
Your thoughts have a frequency.
And what you put out into the world kind of reverberates
back to you.
Now, I do like it in theory, but I don't think it's enough to stand on its own, because
I'm a big, like, kind of, like, grinder mentality, right?
Like, if you want percent target, right?
If you want an outcome, you've got to put in true actual effort.
You've got to, in true actual effort. You've got to work for it.
And I think my problem with overall manifestation is that I think it allows a big amount for
just this idea of allowing the universe to kind of bring to you what you envision for
yourself, whatever you deeply envision for yourself.
So I think that there's like a major disconnect between what my overall idea,
my idea is of how to get what you want and that idea.
Yeah, no, I understand.
I agree with that also.
I think that you have to have balance, but I just think that for the most part,
the people that I, because my sister,
she's really in this world with the Brunei Browns
and all of them and she's constantly following all these people
who do these Instagram lives and stuff.
And for the most part, what I hear is definitely
that you need to attract things.
Like manifestation is all about attracting stuff, right?
It's what's the whole law of attraction.
Like this all, who's her name?
Rhonda, who wrote the book, the laws of attraction?
But they do, they do often discuss
like the need for also actionable stuff.
Like you have to also balance it out.
You can't just, you know what I mean?
But a lot of people are so stuck in this mindset
of they're full of anxiety, they're full of stress,
they're full of negativity
that just the act of manifesting alone
gets them out of that headspace and then
allows them to be able to go and do all those things. So I think, yeah, I mean, someone should
read like a book on Man of the Station and then your book and then together they would have superpowers.
Well, I find that interesting that you just said that because there's other, what's in that same
world that you were just mentioning is this idea of like selfcare, of meditation, self-reflection, exercising therapy.
All of these things are kind of in the same bucket.
And I like a lot of those things, obviously.
I love a lot of those things I talk about it all the time.
But what I, my concern and what I don't like about
the idea of manifestation is putting way too much onus on
your
with like visions and your will
Versus actual work. Yeah, just your thoughts to get to get to what it is
But then again like you know, I don't want to say that like I know what you think becomes like what you do think
actually does become
Reality, right like what you do think actually does become reality, right?
Like what you focus on becomes your truth.
So there's elements of it.
This is the thing.
I think there's elements, the raw materials of what it's about.
Maybe I like it, but I think over time and because of social media and all
these like kooky coaches out there.
Yeah.
Which is really a problem, by the way.
Which is really probably the problem.
They've like butchered what it really means at its essence
and then added all these other things
to become this entire subculture of self-help,
which I'm not someone who definitely doesn't like very much,
doesn't agree with.
Yeah, I, the coaching world is,
I think the coaching world is actually quite dangerous.
Like, I remember you and Mark Manson talking about this
in terms of the self-help world
and some of the issues there.
I think that there are serious scammers out there
who are constantly just prying on people's insecurities
and their low points in life
to be able to get a ton of money out of them.
And I think that's a huge problem in the coaching world.
I feel like it's, I mean, some stuff.
It's crazy.
It's the number one job on social media, right?
It's coaching.
That's how people are making their living.
They're like selling, you have funnels and sales funnels
and they're praying in my opinion on people
that are in a bad place in life,
dark place in life who are really struggling,
who really have, don't have the wherewithal to discern from
one or the other.
And not only they take in their money, but they're giving them misguided hope.
And I know that I'm a big believer that if you don't have hope, you don't have anything,
but misguided hope is really, really dangerous, in my opinion.
So like I'm all about giving people, as
you can imagine, this is what my whole podcast is about, is giving people tactile, practical
things that they can do to even make their life 1% better, 10% better, that they can actually
take the ownership of themselves and create that.
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comes with you know not only is supposed to visualize it, but then
you also have actually like a plan to get from A to B to C to D great.
But if it's just like willing it and putting all the agency on yourself as you have all
the control what happens on the outside, because the other train of thought and what is like
people are talking from both sides of their mouth is that you don't have control
of what goes on out there and all you can control is yourself.
So if all that, what you control is yourself, how do you then have control
of all those external forces that you are supposed to be manifesting to work in your favor?
So when it doesn't work in your favor, when it doesn't happen, it doesn't work in your favor, then you go down a really dark rabbit hole. Because the part, like I
said, is that people don't take into account all sorts of other ancillary things that are
happening, like the socioeconomic, like any kind of like psychological thing or sickness
or health issues. I mean, I just think it's a topic that needs to be really dissected. I mean, this is
not maybe the best only time we're going to talk about it. It's just opening up this conversation
a little bit to really, to a conversation that's beyond just, yeah, like it's a vibration and
mind over matter. And if you, you know, achieve it or believe it and it will happen
or whatever, you know, all these nice cliches, you know?
I feel like something that would be important
is because some people do like life coaches,
like they really would like to have them
and some of them are really great.
Some are great for sure.
But I think what would be a really good tangible thing
is like helping people understand how to discern
between the good ones and the bad ones
because there are so many of these people out there
that are spewing BS, but then there are also like
real treasures out there that can actually help you.
And it's also individual.
One person might work great for one person
and not for another.
And so I think that would be a really good actionable item
to be able to help people see like, okay,
well that's something I should be weary of, you know?
Someone who's always trying to upsell you on something is somebody that you should be cautious of.
They're consistently trying to upsell you on various products or digital products or
this, that, and the other that they have, that's definitely of concern in my eyes.
You know, anybody who's consistently trying to get you to come to like 10 different retreats
and wants you to pay for the bonus and the gold and the VIP and the silver.
It's like I'm very weary of that sort of a scheme. I find this to be really, I just think that that's like a slippery road to go down with a lot of those people.
And that's something that I always look out for as well. And I also think their social media presence is a really big factor too.
Like I really like to see what some and social presence looks like.
If it aligns with me, if it does not,
if I think it's full of a bunch of BS,
if it just looks like really generic content,
there's just a lot of good red flags
that you can take account for.
And there's also some green flags
that you can look for within a life coach.
Let's do what I think too.
I agree with you, definitely I agree with that.
But I think also, I find it curious when the people,
okay, the first step is discernment.
Look at who you're following.
Again, we talk with us so often, watching who's telling you
about manifestation, key right there, right there.
And the content that they have is actually quite important
because if they are being super flashy and braggadocious about
all the material things they have, I think to me, that's a red flag.
That's a good red flag.
That's a huge red flag.
I see a lot of people on social media who are talking so much about laws of attraction
and manifestation, like talking from their private plane, which they probably don't own,
and wearing, you know, ball-main,
or was that how you say ball-main?
I don't know, but I've actually always wondered.
I think it's ball-main.
Wearing Valentino, ball-main,
wearing a really expensive clothes,
and who are basically trying to sell you
a life of material riches.
To me, such a turn-off and a major red flag.
Okay, so to me, if you're seeing these things,
probably you shouldn't be taking their advice.
And I-
They're offering you like crypto-finance advice.
Definitely run.
They're offering you crypto-finance.
Exactly.
And if tea stuff run for the hills. But But you know, again, this is really about
just opening up a conversation that's beyond just taking things at face value. I'm a big,
I really am about and I really, I try to shed any type of light and, you know, pose a question
that maybe, you know, you might be thinking, but not sure of.
Maybe it can be some, you can glean some insight from the two, you know, Yahoo's on this
podcast to think about something differently.
But I really believe that manifestation has really taken over in terms of personal development
and self-help and just really think about what that entails.
And if you are somebody who is a big believer in it
and it's something that's really helped you,
I love to hear your story.
I'd love to hear how it has.
Please share in the comments, let me know
and we can revisit the conversation.
Yeah, definitely.
You're dropping on the Facebook group while you're at it.
Tell us your story.
Exactly.
And nothing ever, I want to say this, I want to end with this.
Nothing ever replaces good old fashioned hard work period. [♪ music playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing like this, I know you will like, hopefully, love my book, Bigger, Better,
Boulder.
And why?
It's because it's time for you to start living the life you want and not just the life
you get.
I not only help you answer the questions like, what do you want?
Most in life and why don't you have it.
But I also help you make it a reality.
The link is in the show notes for you
to easily check it out now.
And thank you again for being here
and spending time with me.
Now, go show up to your life
and live a bit bolder today. I hope you enjoyed this episode.
I'm Heather Monahan, host of Creating Confidence, a part of the YAP Media Network, the number
one business and self-improvement podcast network.
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