Hamish & Andy - Hamish & Andy 2020 Ep 114
Episode Date: October 21, 20201. Power moves book unboxing 2. Fair footy trade 3. Brittany the Song Database - special skill 4. Unopened loyalty card check in 5. Andy is getting a dog ...
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1.
A Hoi to the H-Men! A Hoi Abon!
A Hoi Jacky Boy!
A Hoi J Cat and a Hoi to Eleanor.
Yes.
Who has uploaded what she is up to today very easily
at homiecheap.com.
Hi boys!
Nearly nine o'clock in the morning.
I just thought I'd give you guys a bit of an update on one of the power moves.
I went to the toilet last night about 4.30 which happened to coincide with the time my partner wakes up for work.
When I returned from the toilet, I realised that he had made the bed so I had nowhere to sleep. Another thing is my partner uses the breadback of what my dad draws which is a high on dial
intra. So when I put someone back to him he lets them know.
Anyways, congrats on ESP home. Good smoking and
under and happy birthday. Jack, pay attention to your hobby's mate.
Alright, cool, hobby's mate.
All right, cool.
That's cool.
Can you head screw it on,
don't worry, hobby's mate, Jack.
Love the brag back.
What?
What a dead driver.
Yeah, no, no, no.
A dead driver.
Spooned.
Can't tell you, you're on the floor,
you can't bounce back.
You're dazed.
I think I bought this, I just think that's a haven't.
Speaking of the My Dead Drives of Volkswagen Tiguan,
which we have established on the show,
is a very tough car to get.
Very tough car to get, not impossible to get.
And not a collector's edition by any means,
but it is certainly one of the harder cars to get today.
Drive away in a dealership.
They often have to ring around the country to find stock.
That's pretty impressive in itself, yeah.
Did I tell you when I saw three T-gones in a row?
Oh!
Did I not tell you?
I'd wrote it down to tell you.
It was going into a fair, near Dad's place,
in the country, the tough cars to get.
Like a clean beer.
Yeah, it was Australia's third most famous,
difficult to acquire sports crossover shows.
Going into the paddock at the fair, and there was three Tigwans in a row.
And I just liked seeing three white riders.
One of them was dead because I was following his car in.
Yeah, still.
Yeah, you're right, three white rhinos in New York.
With some ex-arms, just trying to keep it just being conspicuous going down Fifth Avenue.
I think that's three what?
Hey, thanks, Delanna, doing that and speaking of Palmo's, which she got got by her partner.
I have here guys.
What a moment, Amy.
Look at this.
This is the first
Power move book that has got air freighted here, so don't get excited yours on arriving
For another few weeks tried to explain to people over email and several times they are taking this way time getting here
You will get it don't panic they're getting there. What is it half-way through November early November?
I've ever done it right
You look like a sporty Moses.
Doesn't he, Jack?
Holding a tablet.
Oh, a tablet.
Was it Mount Sinai in the Bible?
Not sure.
Me neither.
You look like a modern Moses.
Yep.
You've got the cardboard corregate tube, I assume that is.
Yes, this is the cardboard, which we get to keep for free.
And you will as well, you get the
cardboard pack when you buy the ball.
Don't have to send it back.
As we covered Andy, unlike Moses now, he's going to use the end of a pen to open the sticky
tape that surrounds one of the...
And because it's on the corrugatured pack, I'd be surprised if it was any damage.
There won't be any damage.
There was a guarantee, so here we go.
Yes.
Oh, I don't know.
Well, it opens well, doesn't it?
It comes with its own display case.
It's a bespoke Corrigan.
It's actually better than I thought it was.
That's a really great Corrigan Cheever.
I mean, rush to the website because we will be putting
something of this up on socials.
I know what you've seen.
Have a look at those.
The head and tail band.
Where's the glue?
You can't look at that.
Where's the glue?
Where's the glue on the spine, Jack?
Have a look for the glue.
Point to the glue.
Point to the glue, Jack.
Can you show the courtroom, Jack?
Can you show the court the glue on the spine
of the top of the tail of the spine?
I cannot.
He cannot show the courtroom because of the,
what was it called?
Hand-tailed bands.
Hand-tailed bands.
They're beautiful, aren't they Jack?
This is great.
It smells great too.
Handed over to Hayley.
No, no, no, no.
The most didn't come down and hog the...
Thank you.
It's us, Arie.
Oh, it says do cover your neighbor.
Did you get your rushed over one?
Oh.
You flipped it open.
What move did it take you to just naturally flipping it open?
Number 76, up high down low.
When going in for a handshake, hold it hand-eat.
Either way too high, chest height or way too low.
Knee height forces the other person to adjust to the new reality.
You're forced upon the front end.
I mean, it's special. Going back to the cover, I mean, it's special.
Going back to the cover, I mean, it's hefty, isn't it?
It's way to this. What do I mean?
Are you sure this is only the amount of pages it says it is?
And I, it's got a matte and gloss finish.
It's got a...
I've got to fact this one, sorry.
When you're at a gig after the band plays their very first song of the set,
simply say one more song.
This Thursday's an off-guard and makes it look like you control the set.
So, I spot you there on the front,
and with a matte laminate finish,
how's that feeling in the head?
Really nice in the hands.
It's 171 pages, but you can't believe how you get that much weight out of 171 pages.
Is that any grams for a spoon? Is that?
Would it be mesorising? I am a bit mesorizing.
That's great.
Just see if you've been...
It's got the signature page at the back to you.
This one's obviously unsigned, but it could be one of the fails and that you sign.
Does it have a space for the signature?
It does.
Well, we're able to...
Let's just blank when you get the book without the signature.
We'll have a read on the left-hand side.
If you see a signature on the opposite page, you can try and finally say that you've got a limited edition copy
personally signed off on by Hane and Andy.
Of course, seeing such a signature book
required Jack Post to fulfill the obligation he made
to the show to sign 1,000 copies.
With this in mind, we feel a signature on the adjacent page
will represent a miracle.
Jack has a strong history of pursuing loopholes,
a track record of shirking responsibility
of weaseling out of work,
and a general can't be bothered attitude,
which means the chance of this book being signed
or as likely as in Fannie Ami's Bitcoin password.
Given this, we encourage every purchaser of the book
to carry it with them at all times,
with a pen on hand, so if you see Jack Post in the wild,
you can get him to honor his commitment in the flesh.
So, Ham, there's one final thing to do.
We've got a table in here. Let's
just see if it works. And it is a coffee table. It's a coffee table. Now, at the moment,
my hand is cramping hard because of the weight of the table. And the heft of this quality
book. Yeah. As it says on the front cover, it is a deluxe coffee table book. Here we go.
Facing it on the table now. Let's see if it works. This is like the moon landing.
I can see the surface of the table.
It in itself appears to be some sort of laminate wood,
but not a mat laminate, which is the cover of our book.
I'm placing the table down now.
It has contact with the table, but it's wobbling.
It's wobbling the table a bit,
but I still am bearing a bit of the weight
with my fingers I'm releasing.
It's out of it.
It's out of it.
It's out of it.
It works.
It works.
It's a coffee table book, everybody.
It is just held.
You wouldn't want to go, it wouldn't want one page more, and there are a shana that coffee
table.
Yes.
It is.
It's on the table.
It does its job.
Oh.
We should point out that we've sold over 95% of the books and we can't make any
more. No, there's an issue, isn't there? We've sold through, we decided to name the number.
Should we tell them about the number? 29, 990, our favorite number?
29, 990. We thought there was a silly amount anyway. We prepared to give quite a few
back. We're down to, or maybe like like 2000 left. But so we rang Hawks.
So we rang Hawks.
So we rang Hawks.
So we rang Hawks.
So we rang Hawks.
So we rang Hawks.
So we rang Hawks.
So we rang Hawks.
So we rang Hawks.
So we rang Hawks.
So we rang Hawks.
So we rang Hawks.
So we rang Hawks.
So we rang Hawks.
So we rang Hawks.
So we rang Hawks.
So we rang Hawks.
So we rang Hawks.
So we rang Hawks.
So we rang Hawks.
So we rang Hawks. So we rang Hawks. So we rang Hawks. So we rang Hawks. So we rang Hawks, oh, how do you? Hey, guys, really, so I'm so excited. So we just touched the book for the first time and it is amazing.
And I feel that actually we we mentioned the Corrigate Chew briefly,
but then as soon as the book came out, we started touching the book.
Yeah, but we will play with the Corrigate Chew.
Later on too, because that's very high quality too.
I think I think Apple is going to copy us.
Yeah, they released their their next phone.
Yeah, it's going to be a big fan.
Hors quickly, what was the paper reason? You rang me and said, we can print more, but it has
been different paper. We went and we loved the paper. We talked up the paper. It's one of the
reasons to buy the book. Some people don't read, even read, but they love the feel of the paper, and that's why they get the book,
such a heavy piece of paper, too, Horns.
What happened?
I can guarantee the, the, the, the thickness of the paper.
It's just gonna be an off,
more of an off, off white color.
So you can't get the same thickness.
Yeah. How has the,
it was run out on earth.
On earth. On earth. So you can't get the same thickness. How has the heat well run out on earth?
On earth.
Well, at this particular plant, yeah, they can't saw seeing paper.
Well, they could saw it.
And then I can't guarantee you for a Christmas, a Christmas present delivery.
Right.
So at some point next year, we could get more paper at the book factory.
How many books do these guys
do a year or a while? It's either heaps or this is their first one.
I'm sure I do hate small like we do, we're not the only publisher user of them. So you
know, it's just unusual for us. So if we run a plan out of the right, the cool paper?
Yeah.
Correct.
Yeah.
Might be power.
It's not, it's more of a, it's a rare paper because there's,
they buy a heaps of the next quality paper.
Oh, you use that all the time, all of these publishers
are using the crappy stuff.
Yeah, we've gone, we want the deluxe.
How much have you got?
Well, now we'll run you out.
Thank you very much.
Well, that is for the FI slam.
Well, congratulations on, look, actually, I'm not going to
congratulate you too early because there still needs to be
shipped here, but your side of things,
and as you run very smoothly with your hands.
The head and tail bands, there's beautiful as you thought,
and the Spot Laminate, it's probably the Spot UV
on the matte L matte lemonade cover finish,
is everything that you promised plus more mate.
We'd encourage people to go now,
but they're going to be running out,
but you can get the last ones before Christmas.
They will make it before Christmas.
Is that a guarantee hogs?
Oh, absolutely.
I'm going to endless, you know, Australia post
go, bright or something.
But sure, you're going to guarantee it so far.
From your side of the fence, it's going to happen.
I hope you're standing calm. Thanks mate, cheers.
Good job, Holtz. Thanks, guys.
I was so ready for the joke to be and he couldn't get it made.
He really did a good job.
I'm this weekend, the AFL Grand Final, played in Queensland and the NRL Grand Final as well.
It's pretty exciting time for Fuddy Fans across the country.
Crazy old year, but, gee, well done, I'm never on getting it done.
I'm actually not on that chance.
I know that absolutely zero chance.
Not done yet.
Sorry, sorry.
Not done, wood.
And keep the hubs the hub and the well done.
It's incredible.
Also, trade talks is happening a lot, obviously trade.
The trade period will happen when players go from Portugal.
But it's not a simple car side of things.
We're keenly eyeing off Joe Rogan to replace Jack.
They're two of the parts.
We are still some distance apart there.
So most likely Jack, you would assume you'll carry on to next year.
Yeah, but now I know I'm not one of them.
I was put up as trade bait.
Well, for Joe Rogan, it is.
It is.
And that would be huge for you guys.
You would be taking it well.
No, no, we were actually turning them down on that side of things.
So thank you.
Jack, re-science.
Jack, re-science. The funny thing I find with all the articles can be about a trade period is because there's
all these different combinations.
It's not just play for player anymore.
Do you blame, it's almost like reality TV shows are kind of got something to answer for
for this because it's so complicated now with like different layers of deals and the
main thing that's written about
is an Eric and every sports journal
has said this, they're gonna have to be creative
to get that deal done.
Gotta go creative, you can't just go,
we'll take this guy for that guy.
You gotta get creative.
And then look to the point where we've actually
got a bit of audio.
One of the most recent trades at the clubs.
And you do see now in 2020,
just how much things have changed.
Well, Adam wants to come to our club.
We understand you feel he's worth an early pick
and a player.
Yeah, that's right.
Well, the players that you've requested,
we're not prepared to move on from our club.
They're acquired players.
So we're gonna have to get a bit creative.
Would a first round pick do it? No. What about a first round pick in a late second round? No. Well this is going
to be difficult. I mean you've got to present us with something. Is there something you
can think of it's a bit outside the box? Well should we go for it? Yep, let's do it.
Alright, well there is something.
We'll take those two draft peaks you mentioned.
Okay.
And we want all your footies,
all your footballs from your club.
All of our footballs?
Yep.
All your footballies.
Oh, shit.
They can't try and win that any footies.
The team will go to shit.
It's like the main thing you need.
Yeah, that's what we want.
All your footies.
That's our final offer.
Sheepers.
Okay.
Can we, um, could we keep one?
No.
That's all your footies.
We want all your footies.
And when we come to collect them,
we're allowed to search the premises to make sure you haven't hidden any footies around. So you can't come back at night and sneak around and play kick to kick, right? All your footies in when we come to collect them. We're allowed to search the premises to make sure you haven't hidden any footies around
so you can't come back at night
and sneak around and play kick to kick, all right?
All your footies.
Look, I think all the footballs is going to be too tough.
I don't think we can do a deal.
But if we could just have one, we're going to need one.
Just thinking if there's like 40 players on a team,
one football is still a pretty big disadvantage.
That's true.
That's right. Can you hear him?. That's true. He's right.
Can you hear him?
Barely.
Right.
You're right.
Yeah.
I mean, most players wouldn't get a touch all-draining.
Yeah.
That's still going to send their skills into the toilet.
Right.
All right.
All right.
Well, let's keep one foot in.
Mm-hmm.
But it's slightly deflated and we get all your pumps.
Jeepers.
Okay. You can have all your pumps. Jeepers.
Okay, you can have all our pumps, but the original ball must be inflated. No, no.
Come on, no.
Jack, have a word to him.
One fully inflated ball.
I mean, by round four, it's going to be flat.
Let him have one ball.
All right, fine.
We get all your footies, all your pumps.
You can have one ball fully inflated. Thank you know your footies, all your pumps, you can have one ball
fully inflated. Thank you. We get those draft picks as well and we want half your little
mini witches hats. You know that they use for sprints and stuff. A quarter of the witches
hats. Third. Deal. Yeah awesome. Thank you very much.
Thank you. Now we'll get the paperwork drawn up and we'll be in touch. Great, thanks.
Thank you for talking.
Oh, good luck for the season.
No, what is it?
It's just weird.
It's just not good.
The equipment should be really good.
I'll have so many.
We can have each twice as good with the bag.
But all those footies, everyone can have 10 footies.
Maybe we can have one each as well.
Oh, I'm going to take one here.
I'm going to give one.
I'm going to do a few for Christmas presents.
They can't buy. No, sorry. They can't buy anymore. I couldn't make take one year. I'm going to give one. I'm going to do a few for Christmas presents. They can't buy.
No, sorry.
They can't buy any more equipment.
Oh, no, I thought you'd buy it all at the start.
That's it.
That's it.
It would go against the spirit of the deal.
Yeah, great.
We've got them.
Well done.
That's how you do it.
MUSIC
Andy, special skill. Come across my side of the desk. I bought it to you and I said,
what do you think this means? I didn't have a clue. No, we actually had some clues.
We held a read, we went, there's a couple of different ways this could go by a alert
and obviously very talented listener, Brettney. She says, if someone says anything, brackets,
a phrase, a word, a sentence, I can usually sing a song with the same words.
Now we went,
are you making an original up or are you searching a database in your head
for a current song that contains those words or a phrase?
I think I'm more impressed with the second one. The database search is impressive.
There's a song that references that phrase or that word.
If it is to something right there.
Michael Jackson's beat it.
Yeah.
Should've said beat it as my phrase is probably an easy one.
I'm going to go and have a coffee under the bridge.
Oh, okay.
I can't put the coffee bit in, but I certainly can use the second out.
So we wouldn't be great at this, but...
If it existed, that would be incredible.
Just some sort of like shazam, Spotify brain.
But also, we went, look, it could be the first version
where you just make it up a quick original on the spot
that's using the phrase, the sentence of the word.
In that case, we would want, I personally would want like,
the most minimal musical theater quality song, because you can't just put the words we just said to noises.
No, to a vague tune and expect to get away with it.
That's not coin worthy.
So we don't know that we thought let's just do this anyway.
It's organiser have Brittany up.
She joins us now.
A hoi Brittany.
A hoi boys.
Happy birthday, Andy. No need, but thank
you very much, Brittany, for submitting your form at the Evalued and Important Podcasts.
We're going to do this, but we wrote up the opener when it still could go either way.
So let's play the opening now. Yeah. So Brittany, what is it exactly?
I think it's the latter.
I can get a database.
A Shazam.
Oh, a database, Brian.. Oh, I'm not a brace, brame.
No, I was expecting that, Brittany.
We're leaving the door wide open for you to make, you know, quite possibly, bad, instant
musical theater type songs.
But you're able to go.
So if we sort of say, what do you want?
You want phrases, sentences, words.
I mean, you know, you can take the whole sentence and find that in a song or most of the sentence.
I think of word would probably be a bit more flexible.
Okay.
Let's go with a word.
Okay.
So we give you a word and then you will tell us a song that has that word or that theme.
Is that what we're thinking?
Sure.
Yeah. Well, originally the...
Give us an example.
Yeah.
An example of where the special skill came to fruition.
I'll often call myself singing a song.
And I would have heard it from my housemates
talking in conversations I would have picked up
on one of the phrases or sentences.
Right.
And then they'd be singing the song.
So I have never tested it in a public arena. It's more
of a passive skill, so I'm looking forward to seeing what I made of. Okay, good.
All right, well, let's, so what aim, let's go. You go three words, I'll go two words.
It's just a couple words. Jack, do you want to do a word? Sure, okay.
Okay, sorry. The first one I went to my dear Because it's quite hard to think of a word that to me doesn't seem like it's in a song.
Yeah, because I was like, what's the word?
And I went right down magic.
No, that is.
That's the whole play.
I was on cool magic.
I wouldn't write down magic.
Love.
I'd give you love a wide bird.
Yeah.
Live.
Brock.
Yeah.
Okay, so Jack's got a word. Hamish got two, I've got two. If you get, what
was we say three out of five for a coin or that two?
These are four out of five. So it's a song we would know and it includes the word we're
going to say. Is that a fair scope there, Brittany?
Unless I can verify that it is a real song and you can Google it.
Oh, that's fine. Yeah, now we can absolutely.
That's right. So it's unfair to rely on our musical lollipad.
Okay, great. Okay, well, Hane, do you want to keep yourself?
It's tricky one to pick because you don't want to make it too hard,
but you don't want to make it so easy, this is not an impressive skill.
No, I'm going to go with supercala fragilist. Be good. All right, let's go.
Pickle.
Pickle Rick, is that a song?
I think you've just said the word, but you've just named an episode of Rick and Morty.
I don't know a song with pickle in it.
No, he's not.
That was hard.
Quite old, dude.
You have one?
Pickles, yes.
I had a jar of them last night.
That's sort of by the way we got given a handperot with pickles in it.
Okay, let me, she's one down.
Is it in a song, though?
I don't know.
You're the... Oh, I thought you could verify it. Oh, okay. So we have to verify it.
You rule.
You're in a fair enough rule.
Is there a song out there that has peak a little?
Oh, okay. That's an interesting appeal.
Can I put the Google this?
I think so. I think so.
No Gatsong. My like would be on it.
And this is what we need my like.
There is a song called the Pickle song by dinosaur junior.
And the little rascals also have the pickles on it. But they're both kids songs though.
Well, yeah, I can't. One of the dinosaur junior would be a big band. Who's dinosaur junior?
No, they're not kids band. They're like a 90s indie sort of dinosaur junior was like friends with
Smashmouth. All right. Are you into them, Jack? Were they friends with Smashmouth?
They're not public about it. They're
in a poker game together. Okay. Okay. Okay. So are we
starting again? No. She's down one. I think I could have done. I could have done
little rascals. I'll give you that. Okay. Tower.
There's a Huey Lewis song called the Power of Love. Yeah, that's a tower.
Oh no, that's a tower.
So tower with the tower with the team.
Oh, I've got one.
Okay.
The tower.
You're a later guy.
You know, let it go.
All right, all I'm thinking of in my head is I'm going down saying track of the Simpson's
Guy.
I don't think about that.
You're so early in the go.
You think about how bad you're joking.
I mean, of course, if you're in Hendrix or along the watchtower.
Yes, that was the one that came to mind for me.
Oh, easy now and I.
I'm not in the mood for my time.
I'm going to feel like my back. I'm not a good, it's for my time. Oh, I'm still feeling bothered.
Beck had never heard that song until yesterday.
Okay, you're zero from two.
We know.
Okay, come back.
You love come back.
Jack, you got this, Brittany.
All right, I've changed my word just to make sure
that it's a word from a song.
Vibrations.
Oh, for all time.
Back.
Yes, I did. What's really good? Really? Good vibration. mm-hmm vibrations oh what's wrong with that?
what's wrong with that?
really?
good vibration?
good vibration
oh someone's impressed by that
you've made that
you've robbed Britney of the chance to be impressive there
you've gone
here you go guys, 100 meter final
you saying you're in the final?
no one's running against you? yeah, look short. That's only 20 meters.
We want to make sure you make it.
I'm going to get the world record.
OK.
My original world was movies, but I wasn't sure if it was movies.
There you go.
Let's go be in a song.
Brittany, movies.
I just had one.
It's not quick enough.
Is it?
No. I've been being a player. You can't be any face. It's not quick enough, is it?
No, I'm bloody happy, I'm bloody happy,
I'm bloody happy, I'm bloody happy,
I'm bloody happy, I'm bloody happy,
I'm bloody happy, I'm bloody happy,
I'm bloody happy, I'm bloody happy,
I'm bloody happy, I'm bloody happy,
I'm bloody happy, I'm bloody happy,
I'm bloody happy, I'm bloody happy, I'm bloody happy,
I'm bloody happy, I'm bloody happy, I'm bloody happy,
I'm bloody happy, I'm bloody happy, I'm bloody happy, I'm bloody happy, I'm bloody happy, I'm bloody happy, I'm bloody happy, I'm bloody happy, I'm bloody happy, I'm bloody happy, I'm bloody happy, I'm bloody happy, I'm bloody happy, I'm bloody happy, I'm bloody happy, I'm bloody happy, I'm bloody happy, I'm bloody happy, I'm bloody happy, I'm bloody happy, I'm bloody happy, I'm bloody happy, I'm bloody happy, I'm bloody happy, I'm bloody happy, I'm bloody happy, I'm bloody happy, I'm bloody happy, I'm bloody happy, I'm bloody happy, I'm bloody happy, I'm bloody happy, I'm bloody happy, I'm bloody happy, I'm bloody happy, I'm bloody happy, I'm bloody happy, I'm bloody happy, I'm bloody happy, I'm bloody happy, I'm bloody happy, I'm bloody happy, I'm bloody happy, I'm bloody happy, I'm bloody happy, I'm bloody happy, I'm bloody happy, I'm bloody happy, I'm bloody happy, I'm bloody happy, I'm bloody happy, I'm bloody happy, I'm bloody happy, I'm bloody happy, I'm bloody happy, I'm bloody happy, I'm bloody happy, I'm bloody happy, I'm bloody happy, I'm bloody happy, I'm bloody happy, I'm bloody happy, I snake. snake. yep. I wish I could help.
I was going to be a wish I was a snake or something.
um, Britney, hippie hippie snake.
uh, Britney, it's a, it's a no from me, um, as far as whether you think Britney has this skill.
It would be a no for me.
I've honestly been, at the start of this, I sort of liked the three-act structure I thought
we were going to get, which is like at the start going, we're confused by Britney's
skill.
Then you went, yes, I actually do have the sort of shazam Spotify brand went, great, this
is all, this is setting us up for an amazing journey
Yep, then we sort of landed back at the confusion again. Yeah, didn't we at the end? It just it did it peed it out
That's okay, and that's right. We love Peter ads on the show. We're known for that that that that that Matt Dermon film we got shrunk down
Oh, yeah little people fantastic start was it terrible and right?
I heard some bad stuff about film
Fantastic start. What's that terrible end right? I heard some bad stuff about film
The jingle was really a highlight for me. Yeah, the jingle. Yeah, the jingle was good Brittany We'll send you out a token no vales. I don't forget you did get good vibrate
You're not the Simpson's
Thank God
No, no
Sorry about pickle Thank God! Thank you for that one, Jack. I'd taken him no value, tell him your wife. Jack, I was very human. So much, guys.
Sorry about pickle.
That as it turns out.
Can we give it to you anything?
Hey, last week, we had Richard on the show.
He was dubbed in by a snitch.
Yep.
To cover a glitch.
Not a snitch that deserved a stitch. No, no, no, no. No, more of... Yeah, by a snitch to cover a glitch, not a snitch that deserved a stitch.
No, no, no, no, no.
A glitch.
Yes, he's made a roundly's house, said that he was looking at the mail, Richard hadn't
even opened the envelope that had his loyalty card in it.
And it's insane.
And that's insane.
It's like going to King Arthur's house and going, is that Excalibur behind the door?
Yeah, I put it out of the rock and I just never been using it.
Oh, well, you should. I mean, it's a very special sword. Oh, yeah, I'm just using some other stuff
at the moment and I've just I've been walking around with a broom. It's the best sword in the world.
Yeah. Oh, no, I used it to cut up some salad the other day. I'm just more using it in the kitchen.
Richard joins us back again. He vowed that he would unwrap the loyalty card and use it.
Richard, what are you?
Hey boys, how you going?
Welcome back.
We're going very good, Rich.
How's your week been?
Yeah, pretty good, not bad, not bad.
You know, try to make the most of my opportunities to use the card.
Okay, great.
So you have unwrapped it.
I did unwrap it.
Yeah, I had to break the authenticity of the envelope that it was in. What?
What number are you Richard? Just a bit lower than Jack. So 26,491. Yeah, up there was Jack. I'm a same level as Jack.
Sort of yeah. Anything's kind of above five. Yeah. Yeah, I'm not. I'm not. I'm not. I'm not. Richard, did you go out and attempt to use it anywhere?
Are there any stores you can report the good news about?
Are there any stores that are having teething issues?
Unfortunately, all the places I went to all had teething issues.
Hang up on him.
So first.
I don't think you were.
No, I mean, is it because they...
Well, I'll reserve judgment, but I get the sense that it's because the stores in the
area were told to expect a card coming in much earlier in the year, and they've lost faith
in the card because they haven't seen it, and then now they've gone.
They've slipped off the program because you didn't present it earlier.
Which stores were?
Yes, so I'll call them out happily.
So the first place I went to was a burger joint nearby.
I called Gorilla Grill.
I presented it to the manager.
And he, this wasn't having a bar of it.
Sort of gave me a fun look.
So I just walked out without ordering.
Yeah, well, that's funny.
I thought Gorilla Grill was on board.
You might have actually got the day manager.
I think we deal with the regional manager.
OK, yeah.
Pop that down though.
So the second place I went to just and by chemistry house,
to be good change. So, you know, the,
with the chain of command and along it takes
so the message get across, it would take a while.
But the lady of the counter just laughed at me
when I tried to get a discount, which I thought
that was a bit rude.
Right, that's a surprise.'s a surprise isn't it?
We've done good business with Kevin Ford
before telling Andy about,
how many of you have been at business?
Well, we've been at business behind my back,
but yeah, we still did good, great business together.
I think what's happened there,
that's a, you know, unknowingly chalk that one up to COVID.
I think in all, you know,
they're on the front line,
they're selling gloves and sanitizer and masks.
Yeah.
You could have been a new worker as well, maybe, and I don't know, you know. they're on the front line, they're selling gloves in sanitizer and masks. You could have been a new worker as well, maybe,
and I don't know, she does sound like it.
And I think when the messages come through from head office,
just a little extra COVID stuff at the moment.
That's a tiny slip up knot of teething.
We'll jump on that one.
Final one for us Richard.
Yeah, I've tried to contact like you,
Hey, my jubi, of online shopping at the moment. I've been going through ASAS quite a bit. So I've actually to contact like you, hey, my dude, if I'm on line shopping at the moment,
I've been going through ASOS quite a bit.
So I've actually sent a message as well.
Still waiting to hear a response, but I'll put it on.
I can't say this in any concrete way,
but I do have a good vibe that ASOS is on board.
Yeah.
Yeah.
But I think what we're finding there, Rich,
and I'm working through a similar issue at the moment
with a guy, no a Jeff who runs Amazon.
And he, the back end is the problem there because a lot of these companies,
and whenever you go at him here, but a lot of these companies sort of saw the
opportunity in e-commerce.
And they got, they set up before talking to us.
Yeah.
And especially Amazon, I know that's been going, you know, they set up through
these, they bounced.
And they didn't sort of let us know,
we're thinking of doing this online store.
Do you guys have any loyalty cards coming up?
Which is a, they just sort of did their own thing.
And now, annoyingly, they've got a back end entrenched,
doesn't have the facility for the loyalty card,
but they are working on it.
Well, that's good news, Richard, for all those three there.
Teethy probably, around a four-footer.
Just teethy problems, I mean.
It's a thing, can't have teeth without teethy problems.
Yeah, that's what I'm saying, so thing can't have teeth without teethy problem
We don't have a full mouth of teeth yet
We'll we'll we're glad you got the card though buddy. Thanks very much for all right for checking back in with us No worries. Thanks boy. That's like a busy day. See you mate
Annoying for rich just off to get a burger and a cheap of cream. Yeah. Get even.
Let's go.
Quick one for the team.
I am a cadd owner, not a dog owner.
Andy, Neil, I mean you got the fish.
Got the fish, fish owner, and soon to be dog owner.
Are you soon to be dog owner?
Yeah, really.
That the wall has come tumbling down.
Wow.
So she catch you doing.
Are you a great do a dog?
But so dog on the horizon.
But can we see what type of dog it is yet?
Or can we just see it running around?
Now I'd say Welsh Terrier.
The finest of Terriers.
It's full of the tallest area.
That's a very tall Terrier.
Terrier, the tallest.
I think they're tallest of Terrier,
so you can airdale, but we slightly taller,
but she's looking you go.
Yeah.
Like a deck of trump cards.
It knows that he's flexing their dogs.
But yes, that's, that's,
I've been keeping that under my hat. I haven't watched a dog for the past yet
Or what was the other stuff the other way I'm a dog purpose of a dog
Got you that isn't it, but yes
It's not a cherry of the tallest Terry you can buy
Very nice always been walking on with short Terry's sorry
Well, I mean that is I didn't know you at soon to be a dog man great
This is a question then for both of you because Jack I was gonna know you were soon to be a dog man. Great. This is a question. Then for both of you, because Jack, I was going to ask you a dog-edicook question.
Mm-hmm.
Of a bad and incident that I saw, you've got, of course, your medium height dog.
Yes.
Not the dog.
How about the tallest dog I've ever seen?
Your dog will be probably the same height.
Okay, so yours is tall for your breed.
Yep, but not particularly tall.
Yeah, it sounds like I've got this huge tear of this thing.
I was just about like, this is like, for non-dog people,
this is very boring.
Honestly, this is the exact type of conversations
you have at the dog park.
You just pump into people and then you talk about dogs.
Dog hives.
It's very boring.
But you're always saying, but I'm saying,
but for the tariff, amongst,
if you did a signed podcast on talking terriers, Terry Rannisor or something, or yeah, talking
terriers, you would be so much taller than the Scotty Terrier.
You would have a lot of kudos in the terrier, but for the height of your dog.
Boydog, girl dog.
Don't know.
We are allowed to choose when the litter arrives.
Great. They send you the whole litter and to choose when the litter arrives. Great.
They send you the whole litter and then you send it.
Yeah, yeah.
That's why I've got to make sure I'm home.
I'll take them for fairy tall.
I'll take the one, Junting.
Anyway, so you've got a tall dog.
You've got a regular dog, Luna.
When you go for a walk, you're telling us something I started on the weekend and I thought, ah, Jack, I'm gonna ask Jack
about this, being one of the people that I, you know, know, deals with dog stuff.
Sure. It was, you know, because we, things are still, you know, not full mobility in Melbourne.
This is when we were going for the walk, but you're still loud, you know, you're loud out for
a little walk and go get a coffee or whatever. Walk along with my son, along the street, and people are out, a lot of dog walking going
on because, you know, this is where to catch up with people.
Yeah, this is the lot of bump into.
Walk along a street like a strip of shops, and we're going to get a coffee.
Guys walk along with a dog, no grass anywhere, like it's a street.
There's no, the dog assumes the squat. And so when that happens,
you're like, we're on. And the guy, it was a couple walking the dog. And he, you know, made a big
deal because I think people want to show that they've got the bags and everything. Like,
you know, because it's weird moment where I guess for a dog person, like, well, my dog is just
pooing in the middle of the street. And what I like that he's allowed to do that. He's a weird moment where I guess for a dog person like well my dog is just pooing in the middle of the street
Yeah, and what I like that he's allowed to do that. He's a dog. Yeah, you got to show you have the bag ready because
You can't that's the only display you can do you can't put your hand under the dog and catch you
So he's doing the big I've got the bag here, I'm getting ready to do the dogs assume the position.
And there is always this thing,
because there's a non-dog owner, I go,
I just can't believe you have to do that.
I know, this is the part that I'm just having
a real problem with.
And I know that as some of us had two children,
I've spent thousands and thousands of hours
with my hands in poop and stuff,
but I'm like, well, it's just at least that's...
They eventually grow out of it though.
They grow out of it.
Behind closed doors, I made you.
And also, I understand that it's not...
You don't know yet.
No one can see, yeah, you're learning, you're learning,
and no one can really see it.
But to publicly be like, I am picking up this animal's face.
Yes.
And now you have to even more public about it
because you need to show off that you are doing it.
I've got a big bag.
Anyway, he goes to do, he gets the bag,
he's already got his hand like, sheath he gets the bag, he's already got his hand
like she's in the bag, waiting for it to come out.
So, you know, I think again for people to be like,
oh, how could you, yeah, we're all out for walking
just like you dog shit on the street.
Anyway, dog is a huge load of diarrhea.
Oh, yeah.
And it's like, tippy-toe, to get out of the way.
And it's like running, it's a puddle.
And it's staying to kind of like,
slowly run along
the pavement into the gutter.
What do you do?
Oh my God, it's got the sheet in it.
Now he thought he was gonna be dealing
with a plastic and nugget scenario,
which is a compatible mix.
And now he's going over hand full of plastic
and a puddle of dog diary and not a compatible mix.
He needs a paper towel.
He needed a handful of paper towel.
And all the shops are closed.
It's locked down.
Like there's even,
it's a bottle of water, isn't it?
You probably,
Well, then because it's like,
and he had the dog leaves,
so he's like,
and everyone's looking at him.
And he's like,
you stay, you hold the dog,
you stay here, the dog doesn't really care.
I know.
Two to his partner.
Yeah, so he's going to his partner.
Three to the dog.
You hold it, Leach.
Yeah.
Actually, let me just take your cancel tag off.
You're out with no need to do it.
You go find a new one.
So he ends the partner, he's the Leach.
Then he's making a big thing of like, I'm going to go and get napkins.
Right.
Two to three.
Well, it sort of felt like when you have the car accident,
you write the fake note, go, I'm just writing a note
because everyone's watching me.
And I said to somebody,
let's just stay here.
So he went like,
I ain't saying, yeah.
Yeah, he said he's scootin' something.
Like, it's just, just,
good.
He's saying to keep people together.
That's just,
to see how this plays out.
He's hoping to come back.
And even if there's a few people there,
it doesn't matter.
As long as the same people aren't there,
he can see you can get away with it.
If there's long as he,
I was wondering if you'd text
to his girlfriend or his wife or whoever it was going,
just slowly start walking and I'll meet you around it.
It was like, we have to run away from the scenario.
They stayed and he went,
and he found the nearest cafe, which was some way away,
but came back,
and I saw him coming back from napkins,
and the first was like, it's not enough.
Yeah.
It's not enough, and I had,
he bit a hope these are very high-end, absorbent napkins,
because caffeine napkins are really,
like, waxy,
they won't absorb, they're like dipped in wax,
they won't absorb liquid.
I mean, he probably had about eight, yep.
But they said, that's kind of like laying them out,
like he's playing up and also was like,
oh, this is, you can't, this can't be worth it for the time.
And so then he laid them out, then he got his hand
in the glove to sweep up that orange brown mess of napkins.
I'm gonna do it.
Then put it into the bag,
but you look at the pavement going,
we haven't really cleaned anything. You've just shown that you're
willing to do something disgusting as penance. That's exactly what he's gone for.
He's like, I've made an effort. You can all see I've made an effort. What else do
you want me to do? Yeah, there was. Jack, yes, I know question. Would you have
done that? I hate people who leave the poos.
And don't, don't, don't.
I mean, leaving the poos is no excuse for it's like words a little nugget.
I hate that so I always, always make sure I get it.
But the diary, yeah.
I think I would do walk around the corner.
Cool, be a kid.
I'm so down.
Never walk on that straight again. Listener.