Hamish & Andy - Hamish & Andy 2021 Ep 133
Episode Date: May 26, 20211. H&A Airlines – flight selection 2. Jack’s peanut butter test 3. Dewalt v Makita 4. Australia's Biggest Laundrette 5. Jeff’s favour ...
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1.
A hoydem on that for it, Kamesh.
I, Bermusion to Buzz the Tower.
And a hoydamoguse, Jack.
Have a watching the long while.
Did I got the goose die?
Oh, spoiler alert, mate.
A lot of people have never heard of it.
I think he did.
Yeah, we know he has, though.
We've watched.
Some people haven't watched some kind yet.
I've got quite a theme because we've got our plane pad.
A moonsie slide party coming up soon.
And if I'm Mav and Jack's Goose,
you're either Iceman and O,
our cocky enemy for 95% of the film.
Or you're the beer boys.
Or you're the plane.
The only other character.
The plane for people that haven't seen Tokkun,
the plane is a well-feature other character. Yeah. The playing for people that haven't seen Top Gun, the playing is a well-featured character.
The playing will come out to the boys after a long bear flying
and hang at the bar with them, the playing plays volleyball with them.
He's really one of the guys, the playing.
He's also a hoi to Paul,
keeping with the erinortical theme.
Of course.
She is Paul and Howard Springs.
Can I hear you, Hamish and Andy, and podcast, hobbyist, Jack?
It's Paul here.
Just wanted to say it's great to have you back up to your government-mentated break.
Yeah.
Currently here in Howard Springs,
seven days into my government-mandated quarantine,
after operating a repatriation flight from London.
Knowing that I would be spending some time here,
I've saved a few episodes, some are a bit behind
and this might be old news.
By now, but can I just say,
the chances of getting down in the aircraft
at Merngy Slide are lower than Jack Payne
full price for anything.
It's not zero, but it's very unlikely.
Best let that one peter out, I think.
Anyways, keep up the gusto,
and I'll hopefully have this uploaded by the end of the week.
Well, flying a plane from Europe to Australia,
it's certainly easier than trying to upload this to your website.
If there were only some kind of app
where we could share media files easily,
have a good one fellas.
Paul legend, he's hitting all the importance of Paul.
But the, and what would he hear though?
Great man, coming back, but also,
that news for, good news for our Spanish him. It isn't a Peter out.
It is a Peter out. It's a raging hot. It's raging hot, isn't it? Because our emergency
slide party is up and running. We opened up the entries for it. Over 10,000 people have registered to want to come and go down and emergency slide off
a plane without the emergency. And that is, that's the number of people that we can confidently
say in Australia that would self nominate themselves to have stronger than average
ankles.
You wonder, I mean, we covered it pretty thoroughly. We legally had to, but we have covered it farily, just how vulnerable your ankles will be on this slide.
A lot of our team has already opted out.
She said it's quite known that she's come from a weak-angled family.
And we suggested go down and face first.
She has got weak wrists.
So how's the neck?
Pick your point of failure is basically what we'll say to people before you go down
Where's your least likely point of failure? No, everyone is going to fit first
Really clear we don't want to lean out with the good news is
Of you know, we've had a hundred people going on the slide and that's 200 fresh ankles
But bad news is yes, 61 snap necks. We found a loophole to protect angles.
I mean, we're going to get Mark up from Rex Airlines next week to answer some questions.
I reckon they started all, this is great, go nuts, go nuts. And now,
with the ankle talk from last week and now getting a bit more worried about.
I thought we did a good job of harming the ankle danger.
But you imagine the scene on the tarmac once we're down, just everyone walking around,
like just a celebration of strong ankles, just the dancing that will be happening on that
tarmac. People kick in each other as hard as they can in the ankles because they know
that they're amongst some of the most robust ankles in Australia.
It's going to be wild.
Amazing amount of people that have applied, which is so great, lovely.
We only had it up for four days because we wanted to draw it today.
For people who know this field, if you knew to the podcast, welcome.
Welcome, welcome.
There'll be a lot of people standing by,
a lot of people eagerly listening to this,
knowing they're putting their name down on list,
those 10,000 people.
The way we did it, Ando, how many people per flight
was it divvied into?
At 40 plus one.
So of the 10,000, there's possibly 20,000 people
that have entered this 10,000, maybe no,
or maybe they're all the plus ones.
But yeah, they get divided into planes of 40.
So the first 40 people to register would have been on flight H A 001 and then on it went up
all the way to flight H A 262. That's a lot of flights. We've got a lot of flights.
Well, we've 40 people on them. They are booked now. You don't know who's on your flight. They're all
sort of you randomly assigned a seat on those flights for their chockers. 40 tickets per flight. The
way we're going to do this is we've got representatives from each flight randomly selected representatives
that represent their entire flight. Now, it's been the spirit of the last 12 or 18 months that flights get cancelled.
You think you're flying.
You're not.
Everyone's been through it.
Everyone's had trips, the Lied post-bone, whatever.
H&A Airlines is not the most renowned airlines.
So what we have here is actually fantastic.
That's why we really needed to make this clear that we've invented a fictional airline
here, H&A Airlines, that are the ticket holders.
And we will be hold as we cancel almost all our flights now before your very eyes.
There's 262 flights going.
We are going to cancel 261 of them.
This is an absolute nightmare scenario for you if you're in air traffic control
Yeah, where you turn up one morning and you go okay
We've got one runway slot left. How many flights one at 262? Yeah
Well, I've got some bad news for the front desk of that airline
There's gonna have to be a few announcements made. Hey, you're gonna be on the front desk
I understand you've got yourself a little we can switch my mic we can make it an announcement
Yep, can you give us a bit of that for us?
Are you flight your best flight desk voice?
Mm.
Good afternoon ladies and gentlemen,
I assume you're all very excited to fly,
and so you should be.
Keep that excitement sky high,
although for most of you the plane will be Earth low.
You will not be, you will not be taking it with the sky.
Thank you.
Perfect, perfect hair.
Well let's get into it.
Sarah is standing by.
She applied.
Sarah, who are you?
Oh, how are you going, guys?
Very well.
What flight number were you allocated?
Yes, number two, four, six.
Two, four, six.
Quite up there.
Okay.
They've all got the same amount of chance.
They do.
It's been randomly picked off you go.
Hey, everybody.
No, just sorry, someone's ignoring me here at the desk.
Hi, everybody.
Just for all passengers on H.A. Flight 246, we're very pleased to announce your flight.
Here's cancel.
Thank you.
Why are you so pleased?
I'll let the Canada down.
Then you can go, we're pleased.
We're pleased from behind the scenes
because we have a lot less to do now.
We don't have to get the flight out there.
We save on fuel.
We don't have to call the other end and let them know
of flights coming in like from our side of things.
Our day just got a lot easier. From our side of things, our day just got a lot easier.
From your side of things, not bummer.
How was the bedside manner for me?
Flight, so it would be giggling so much because you've just
found out that you know I'm sorry, I'm getting close.
How was the bedside manner, do you think?
I think there's room for improvement.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
It's a little hard.
I'm looking at it.
It says you're a physio.
Yeah, some of my physio students.
We used to.
For Angle Straping.
Yeah, it's the same.
We'll certainly be giving a lot to the physio community the day after.
Yeah, put a good name for me please.
You will absolutely, if you'll see a ton of people hobbling through the door, to
slide.
So we're done out there.
Sarah, thank you very much.
We'll unfortunately move off Sarah, but that one's cancelled.
Amy, join us.
Oh, hi Amy.
Oh, hi boys, how are you?
Very well.
Very good.
We know the flight number that has won.
What flight are you on?
I'm 30.
Okay, good luck.
Thank you.
Good afternoon, passengers.
A bit of a special announcement for everybody who's going to ticket for H.A.
Flight 030 or 30 in land people's chat.
In the end, we say 0-3-0.
How are you? Good to hear. Good news.
Your day is just freed up. Your flights cancel.
That was the kind of forgot.
Amy Hongbong.
Amy, that's obviously a devastating loss for you, but was the bedside man a better?
Did you hear the original one?
I did, yeah.
I think it's getting better.
I think it's getting better.
I think it's more gusto.
I think it's the same for all workplaces, really.
You could all have you'd all love a bit more gusto, but I think, did you see the Hamish?
I think you're giving the exact level
that people would expect from someone delivering
that kind of news.
But I think at first it would sting
if you're at an airport and you got that use,
but then afterwards you go,
well, at least they'll have in fun with it.
You know, like, it's a clear thing.
You know, chin up, like whether the,
whether it's a high gusto message or a low mixture, a low-gum, a mixture.
It's the flight still not taken off.
See, might as well have a bit of fun about it.
Ahoy, Abby.
Thank you, Amy.
Ahoy, Abby, are you there?
Ahoy, boys, yeah.
What flight number are you?
I'm 93.
Oh, okay.
Um, here we go.
MUSIC
Good afternoon, passengers.
All awaiting takeoff on H.A. Flight 0, 9.3.
Good news and bad news. The bad news is your flight is closing soon.
The good news is if that is panicking you, relax. It's all very good. LAUGHTER A few.
So, that's nice to know you don't have to rush to the gate. Have a great night.
If it's not very real radio stations, they do the on air.
I just realized that there's a reason you just do the winners and get the woohoo.
Would you like to, you know, normally on a radio station, they would cut together a package of people who were
whoing and winning.
Would you like to throw an insult at us?
It would sort of a bench.
We can cut together a package of people that were
beavily disappointed with the way we ran the content.
I like the way you've done it.
It's funny.
That's nice. That's really content. I like the way you've done it. It's funny. Thank you.
That's nice.
That's really nice.
I appreciate that.
Okay.
Abby will leave.
She was very lovely.
As a list is Marcus joins.
Oh, Marcus.
Oh, boy, how are we?
Very well.
Very well.
What flight number are you?
Yeah.
One three four.
One three four.
Okay.
Good afternoon. Passengers. three four one three four okay good afternoon passengers have
everyone's having some great fun you've probably seen a few miserable faces
around the terminal try not to let that spoil you though a bit of a special
announcement for all passengers awaiting take-off on H.A. Flight 134. No one likes feeling left out in life, do they? So in a bit of a nice way of looking at what I'm about to say is you're joining the rest of the crowd in the terminal who are heading for the exits and you to make a home.
Unfortunately, your flight is cancelled, leaving you plenty more time to shop at Oraton or get a
first use. Have to buy something for the free upcoming kids birthday and seat.
Thank you. Sorry.
You can't win them all. Thank you very much.
For registering.
Okay, we move on to Laura.
Laura or Hoy to you?
We can do this all day.
Hi, boys.
How are we going?
Very well.
Very good.
What's the flight number are you?
254.
Uh-huh.
All right, the top.
Okay, good luck.
Good night, guys.
It's us again.
Hey, Mission Andy.
You flights here.
We're having Stinker of a day.
We'll be honest with you. We know we're annoying everyone with the terminal with these up there. Get out guys, it's us again. Hey, Mishin Andy, you flights here.
We're having Stinker of a Day.
We'll be honest with you.
We know we're annoying everyone
to the terminal with these updates,
but if you are flying an HF flight 254
and you have a ticket in a surprising turn of events,
try not to rub it in everyone else's faces,
but you guys are taking our we proceed to the day.
You are actually like too far apart, we can't believe it, you can't believe it, you go
into the slide party.
Oh, for the mid-mine, my week, my month.
That's what we aim to do here, I'll get off the mic.
I must admit, it's not as funny as Canceling a Flight, but it's just...
It's not as hard as I'd say.
Actually, Jack, can I get a back on there and ask for a night?
Go for it.
Sorry, guys, us again here at Hamish and Andy Airlines.
I don't want to jam up the rest of the day.
If you just missed the last announcement, the H8 flight 254 is not cancelled, but if
you're familiar with our airline, that means if you do hold any other ticket, please head home
or continue to enjoy the cheap parking rates and and and cheap retail prices we offer here
at the airports and have an enjoyable day shopping. You won't hear from us again. Laura, you are the only flight taking off.
Anyone with ticket to Sky Falls.
A two-foot falls.
Quick question, we have to ask.
How strong are your ankles?
They feel it's very multi-tops.
Yeah, great.
What's the last thing you did that made you think,
my ankles are not bad?
Oh, look, mate. I'm a regular trampolina. I'm all over the deal. Oh! Well, my uncles are not bad. Oh look mate, I'm a regular trampolineist,
I'm all worth it.
Oh, oh, oh.
Well, he got the right, okay.
We know who's going down first.
Oh yeah, I've all been here with tribute.
Thanks Laura.
We'll be in touch with all the details.
We'll see you in a couple of weeks.
And the next thing we've got to do, go on your Laura.
The next thing we've got to do is figure out
and who gets business. Oh yeah, Laura, can we get Laura back?
Well, we'll get to the 2021 this that weekend. Party weekend. Are you a common man, though?
We wanted to give the business.
Okay. What's the, well, when you were jumping on the trampoline, was it above ground,
or was it, was it at a trampoline center? Oh look it was a trampoline center. It was.
Oh must be nice.
Special center just for trampolining.
Oh, Olympic level. That's not very common that Laura.
We'll come back to you Laura.
Okay, we'll come back to you.
Okay, now a little bit of transparency I think is being in due order here. Is this so?
Because before we do the podcast, we kind of jot down on a page, okay, we could talk
about this, this, this, you know, so we can keep things tight.
So we know where we're going.
Yeah, and we know when we've achieved it.
Yeah, we know when we can bring a bill. Yeah. And where we're going. Yeah, and we know when we've achieved it.
Yeah, we know when we can bring a bill.
And that keeps things, I think the listeners appreciate that.
It keeps things nice and tight, keeps things moving along.
And we certainly appreciate it.
We know when lunch is.
So on the brunchy, Jack, what do we have for this bit?
This is called musical test.
But it's not that, is it Andy?
No, it's not.
It's not that.
It's not that. That was a? No, it's not. It's not that. It's not that.
That was a place a place holder in the biz.
Yes.
When we sometimes when we were hiding things from each other,
you might write a different thing down.
Jack, it's not a bad thing.
In fact, it's a very good thing.
But we were interested.
Well, I was interested.
And I raised this idea with Andy.
I said, I was interested. Look, you've got two peanut butter
sponsors. You were juggling, you're juggling an absolute
nine field of corporate value to both the brands that you
represent. You foolishly took on two, I think we can say.
You represent them both yet are paid by night. And then I that that's why everybody's happy with that setup is because they're not paying
anything except a couple of jars of peanut butter every month.
I'm not receiving anything except a couple of jars of peanut butter a month and everybody
seems to be happy with low cost, low reward.
Low value.
Yeah.
So you're an extremely low value influencer for them and you like that,
you've put forward to this deal, I can ask you to do a review. But I tell you what, people message me
when they're having peanut butter on Instagram with the photo of the peanut butter and said,
which one's coming in more? Is there a brand you're influencing them more on? Yeah, I got to say,
Mavis is probably getting more traction
than the monkeys.
And I would just say for the monkeys,
because they're a smaller outfit,
I don't want people to forget about them,
I just think the recall for monkeys
and peanut butter isn't there.
Okay.
Well, you're not even saying it right,
isn't it 99 monkeys?
Yeah, and I've been saying 99 monkeys,
it's 99th monkey.
No.
No.
No.
No.
No. No. 99th monkey. You're up in. Like when Michael Jordan came and said, sorry, I've been saying Nicky.
That's not what my shoes are called.
I'm so sorry.
I thought it was Nicky.
I thought it was a great word.
I'm so sorry.
It's Nike.
Mine is St. Lauren.
So sorry, it's not channel.
It's shit, yeah, I've been saying channel number five.
It's like a Robbie.
Oh, really, sorry about that guys.
Anyway, no harm, no fail.
So you've got the name, okay.
Well, this is the tricky thing for you, Jack, is,
so would you say that more people buying mavers and-
I guess because it's just on the shelves in the supermarket, but if you say-
So is your message to those people that have been buying mavers, don't buy it,
by 99th Monkey?
Yeah, well, I get more from 99th Monkey than I do from mavers.
Mavers was really, mavers was like a one, just a one-off shipment and I kind of haven't heard
from them again.
So, how much pain about it, do you know how many do they send you in the shipment?
They probably thought they gave you a year's supply.
No, they just gave me a big, like a really big job.
And that in itself was kind of annoying because the job was so big.
Right.
And they're shouting.
They're shouting.
They're shouting like that.
They're shouting like that.
They're shouting like that.
They're shouting like that.
Oh, well, what if it's also just a...
Are you resigning? Are you resigning from neighbors? I mean, I mean, I mean, if they're still open, I've just the communication
dropped out.
So if they're still open, never employed as well.
I took a good job, you never got.
But weren't you also a bit frustrated at 99 Monkeys, say 99th Monkeys, from the other
week they were trying to make you go to an event?
Well, I wasn't a no, like, okay, well.
Yeah, they sent me a message and said,
do you want to come to the launch
about new peanut butter?
But you know, you guys know,
I don't like to go to stuff much.
I don't know, nothing, not even our meetings.
It's me, it's me.
It's like, I just, I'm just, we've got to be
more obvious. I dread to think where you rate the peanut butter situation. I just don't
like to go to things much, even like friends, weddings and stuff. No, I'll go, but I don't
get super excited about it. I'm with you. So the launch of a peanut butter, I looked
at that and thought, no, no, I don't want to go to that. But now I'm going to, now they
think there's an arrangement where I'll come to events.
I want to want to, I want to want, they thought that
because you're open the floodgates and went,
give me, give me, give me, feel that little Jackie's pantry.
And now surprise, surprise, they want something for it.
Anyway, we had a, Annie and I thought,
by the way, they'll listen to this and the excuse I gave
will not line up with the story they're hearing here
but I just didn't want to.
What was the excuse to say that's something on the the story they're hearing here but I just didn't want to get the excuse.
Okay so there's a moment.
You know it's just couldn't miss it.
So in one fell sweep you said I'm not happy with one of my sponsors and I'm thinking
of resigning.
Yeah.
Plus the people that buy that peanut butter I'd recommend they buy the other one.
Then this is the other one that you recommend they buy to the other guy.
Then to the other one you buy said I lied to you and other guy. Then to the other one, you both said,
I lied to you and I don't want to go to your event.
So again, we see if you've got...
Sorry, one more, one can I throw one more?
I've got a third peanut butter coming in
and I'm just trying to check.
So I don't get the name wrong.
Goodies and goodies.
Goodies is a level of professionalism
like 99th monkey would kill for.
Thank you to Goodies and Grains
who are sending me some peanut butter as well.
How much is it?
Seven cents a year.
What's in the mail?
It's not expensive.
It's not expensive.
If you had to pay for your own peanut butter for the whole year.
This is why people do it for cars and, you know, thanks.
Thanks so much.
But it's not about, for me, it's not about the financial gain of just getting free. Is it the panel of getting something for free? I'm just like promoting the little guy,
99th monkey. It's like, it is a mum and pop operation. We don't buy from paying us in their home.
You don't like promoting that much. You won't go to their event. Yeah, well,
is this a vlog that I don't have to do anything, but I'll eat the peanut butter for free.
I don't know if you've got any more questions, but I have eat the peanut butter for free. Yeah. Yeah. Ah! Why don't you go do more questions, but I have,
wait, we have one more question.
And then I'm going to slide into disclose.
Lies eat, and you please bring in a spoonful of peanut butter here.
Jack, we just want your opinion.
I'm blind to this.
Whether this peanut butter is good,
does it belong to one of your...
Does this taste nice?
Okay.
Jack, you...
I'm having the peanut butter now.
Do you think he's mad?
Mm.
You know what?
Yep.
This is one of my butters.
This is not one of mine.
Is it one of mine?
Is it one of mine?
It's a bit sweeter.
I reckon this is, this is like a bigger
or something straight off the shelves.
I hate it.
It's a bit sweeter.
Is that a good thing or a bad thing?
No, bad.
I just want natural peanut butter.
Hey, Jack, there's no sugar in that peanut butter.
Really?
They must be getting some sweet peanuts from someone.
I can promise you, there's no sugar in that.
The ingredients of that peanut butter is just peanuts, that's it.
It doesn't taste like one of mine is my final guess.
Right.
Now that you know, now that you know, there's no sugar in it, does that change your opinion
of that peanut butter to go?
Well, I haven't made it.
That's a pretty creamy, tasty peanut butter for no sugar. Or no additives.
No additives.
No additives, just peanuts.
100% peanuts, that's the ingredients.
Oh, I like that.
I like that.
Would you possibly take them on?
Yeah, but there's room for everybody.
No, that's not.
This is my, Jack, what you're eating there
is my personal favorite peanut butter,
which just comes from a local market.
I love that.
I love it.
That's it. It's a local,
I love the local suppliers. I love that home, home-grown sort of feel. Well done,
home. Is it better? Yeah, well, is it better than your current sponsors? That better than a
maver's? It's better than a maver's, not as good as a 99th monkey. Oh, who you sent you the most?
29th monkey. Ooh. Who you sent you the most? It's just train John Adolfo. And this is not the point. It seems like you hate
Mavis the most, but you're getting the most feedback from them.
The ones working the hardest to establish the relationship with you.
My point is Jack, if we were peanut butter managers here, we would be like,
you are all over the shop with this policy.
You're cheese enough, you're biggest customer.
You're telling people to ban and ship,
they're the only ones really sending you the most product.
You're giving people plugs that have promised you
it's in the mail and it's not even here yet.
Yeah, true, true.
Goodies and grain.
Yeah, goodies and grains.
And I actually told them, I said,
I can't be an ambassador for any more.
So if you send it, I'm not gonna say anything.
And look at that, they got the free plug, what on?
Like you in no control of it.
Just second.
In my mouth open.
And then it's just happening.
Jack's just asking us to turn the mic back on again.
For the next thing he's not finished.
You have to have a thing. Okay, I will let you. For the next thing he's not finished. You have the fourth.
Okay, I will let you talk about this next thing
you want to talk about.
If you say on air,
like when did the mic's run?
Well, you just said it about the peanut butter.
You're like,
you're like,
that peanut butter that you got from the market is delicious.
I don't know how they do it.
Well.
And that's a better endorsement
than any of these commercial agreements received with the
better butter.
He's okay, peanut butter clothes.
Peanut butter is completely close.
I just wanted to clear one more thing about sponsors in general on the show.
We were wearing the Mekita hoodies as our suits at the moment for the show and I said I'll
wear mine until DewWalt comes in.
And I would love to support DeWalt
because I'm already on a DeWalt battery system.
Yeah, so which is a slight to make it,
we were like, all right, mate,
if that's what you want,
because you know,
Makita have stepped up and they said,
look, we've got the hoodies and wear it.
And they even offered some tools
so that Makita's object,
whatever we want to, whatever we want,
you should see it, like,
my garage is full of green,
ando, and then how generous the Mikaela,
like, that was great.
Well, that's true,
the Eski that runs on batteries
that can do cold or hot,
can keep pies warm in the Eski,
it's unbelievable.
Ando, don't get to a pair of headies,
help because what I'm here to say is,
I didn't hear a squeak out of
the wall so I've personally contacted our man at McEater and I'm happy to say I am now with you guys
on brand on McEater my tools are getting sent later this week and I'm all in
such a weasel I just need to call that guy up and say,
because then you can't call up a number of schools.
It doesn't hurt, you made, you can't call up
another band's tools.
But what if you made a stand-jack?
Something came in from DeWalt today.
Yeah, we're going to, we're going to surprise you with this.
And we're going to surprise you.
DeWalt have heard you, and I've got something,
don't look under this.
I've got something from DeWalt now.
We swear to God you have been looked after by DeWalt.
Really?
Because the Maketa guy is so generous.
He's gonna say he's even sending you hoodies over.
All I'm saying, Jacko, is something scream from DeWalt?
Wow.
Do you like to pledge allegiance to DeWalt
and receive this deal?
You already have the system.
I would, I know what I'd like to do.
I will be an ambassador for two tool companies.
Yes, don't shake your head, Amy.
You know, I can be, I've proven it with peanut butter.
It can't be.
You can't be.
It's a debacle with peanut butter.
And then a fourth one came along.
You said, you like them the best.
So you know, you're going to, you're going to Walt or McEda. What are else are you going to throw away what's under the desk? You have
been looked after by the very people you requested to be looked after. I'm a
shame that Makita have allowed you in after the stance you made.
Oh, wow. It's a real mystery box situation because I don't I know what I'm
getting with Makita and the do what is a mystery box. because I know I'm getting with McKeeta and the DeWalt is a mystery box.
But you have the DeWalt system already and if you look
inside your heart, you did say I prefer you said it. You
said you chose in DeWalt. Yeah. I'll go for the mystery box
and I'll have a look at what's okay. Okay. We're officially
call off the call off the tools from McKeeta. Okay. There we
have that on the record call your off Jack. Oh my God. Is it
this this? That's just that it's a backpack
No
You can't have you mcc It's the flippy, it's backtrack of MSN. It's the flippy. It's the flippy.
It's the flippy.
It's the flippy.
It's the flippy.
It's the flippy.
It's the flippy.
It's the flippy.
It's the flippy.
It's the flippy.
It's the flippy.
It's the flippy.
It's the flippy.
It's the flippy.
It's the flippy.
It's the flippy.
It's the flippy.
It's the flippy.
It's the flippy.
It's the flippy.
It's the flippy.
It's the flippy. It's the flippy. It's the flippy. It's the flippy. It's the flippy. It's the flippy. Hey, I've got a direct message on my Instagram from a fellow who had seen a store that claimed
to be Australia's biggest.
Yeah.
And he also reminded us of a segment we used to love to do back in the radio days called
Australia's Odley.
We like to find the somewhere that said there was the only thing in Australia.
We did expand that life to biggest or other adjectives, but the only thing in Australia. We did expand that life to biggest or other adjectives,
but the only thing in Australia and they would, and then we'd call them and we'd say,
oh, got some bad news for you, you know, we're opening up also. The natural.
The natural. Yeah. Pirate themed archery bar. So you're not, you're not the only one anymore.
You can't market yourself as such. You're now one of two. And they would, people would not like
that because a lot of people that have the claim
to the title, life to hold onto the title.
So yeah, we've, we've, this is for an enterant, it's a place called Alex Laundret.
Yep.
And we've been passed this place in Brunswick and Melbourne.
It's, it's a, she's a lot of, she's pretty big.
She's a big Laundret.
It's a big Laundret.
And they do have in giant letters, Australia's largest Laundret, it's a big Laundret, they do have in giant letters Australia's largest Laundret,
a largest Laundret in Australia at the front.
Yep, they also have on the windows five maxi jumbo washes, is there other bold claim?
And when you got them, when you are the biggest Laundret, having a maxi jumbo, like two
adjectives that add to a size, a maxi jumbo washer is the kind of thing you'd have.
One would be huge, let alone five of them. So size is important to them. The
science faded, so it's been there for a long time. They clearly branded themselves at that,
so we thought today, ham, you throw a cat amongst the pigeons.
You're going to give them a call and let them know that you're starting another laundry.
And you've got, have you got them for square meter in size him or have you got, are you going
with bigger with the men?
This is where it's bigger.
With the men.
Okay.
My bigger and it's time to then you'll
down it.
Let's have you do it.
This is Australia's only.
Radio signal, we call around to see if you are
Australia's only at something.
This is Australia's only. So the use of the word radio there dates this?
Did the last time we did it?
Jacko, you got the number, good luck, heim.
I wonder if we'll get Alec himself.
Oh, that'd be good.
That was the international one.
Hello.
Is that Alecundret? Yes. Oh, it's Tim Felsy here. How are you?
Yeah, good, good. Yeah, good. Thanks. Listen, I'm just wondering if I'm can I speak to a manager
or an owner or someone in charge? Well, what do you need to do? Oh, it's a bit of a business discussion.
Right.
You want to give me a bit more information?
Oh, maybe I'm talking to the right person.
I'm actually, I'm in the game.
I'm a co-owner, a co-laundret owner.
We're from Laundry Galaxy.
Right.
Don't know if you've heard that.
Not open yet.
Open it up in Ascot Vale.
Have you heard of Laundry Galaxy? No, not really. Right. Don't know if you've heard of it. Not open yet. Open up in Ascot Vale. Have you heard of Laundry Galaxy?
No, not really. No.
Uh, yes. So opening, getting into the Laundret game, got all the washes, got everything planned out. We've got our grand opening in two weeks time.
Um, now I know that we're technically competitors, but hopefully this can be a bit of a friendly call. Got a bit of a sticky situation. We've just running the numbers on our laundry, on our facility, and
we talked to our legal team, we talked to our contractors and our surveyors, and it's
actually come back that we are very, very big or a very, very big laundry. And I was
actually surprised when I saw the numbers. I knew the footprint, but I hadn't really thought about it. It turns out that we are so big, we're the largest
in Australia. Okay. This is the one you're building,
yeah? We've finished. Yeah, we're opening in two
weeks, Laundrie Galaxy. Now on the front of your Laundret, you do have, you know, Alex Laundret,
largest Laundret in Australia.
And just letting you know that when we open up, I'm afraid according to our maths, we've
got you by 11.1 square metres.
Are you talking about the size of the actual building?
And well, and I think we might have your numbers of machines too. Hmm.
How many do you have?
Not sure how many there is.
Roughly. Anyway, yeah, what's what's the purpose of this call?
Look, it's trying to figure out.
Well, no, the purpose of the call is on the front of your building, you have the largest
law and dread in Australia.
And that's what we're going to put on the front of our building.
So how many machines do you have?
How many do we have?
How many do you have?
Well, I'm a new rang me.
145 machines.
Almost pretty big, yeah.
Yeah.
How many of you got?
Now we're near that.
And I notice you got five maxi jumbo washes.
Do you still still the five?
Yeah.
Yeah, we got six.
Yeah, okay, yeah.
Oh, like I said, more of a courtesy guy,
I don't want this to get legal, but I'm just,
I'm just, I'm just trying to work out.
Yeah, this is a courtesy.
Well, what are you just trying to ring me to say,
you're not the biggest anymore?
Well, I suppose that's, it's never,
it's never easy you're saying.
It's never easy for a man to call another man and tell him he's going to have to change
his sign, but I suppose that's what it's come to.
So yeah, you'll have to be the second largest laundress in Australia or formally the largest
laundress in Australia.
Yeah, yeah.
I mean, what do you want me to y'all paint out the front is because you rang me not today, but then sometime the next two weeks
well
Yeah, it's it's it's a sticky one isn't it because yeah when when laundry galaxy
I mean we we'll be making a pretty big deal of it. We're
Sort of thinking we're thinking we're gonna get you know the local paper down there and everything and we don't want people going,
I hang on a second, that Alex Laundra, the largest Laundra in Australia. And we want to be able to say to them, no, if you go and look at that now, you'll see second or formally painted up there quite.
What's your name? Tim Falze.
Tim, was it?
Yeah.
Tim Falze.
FAL, just the normal spelling, FALD, SLY.
And what was your name?
John.
John.
Hey, how's it going?
John, I've got one more thing I need to tell you.
John, I've got some great news for you.
John, this was a test.
It's a test.
It's Hamish and Andy here, mate.
I'm not sure if you've heard of it.
When you use John, we're not opening a competing laundry. I wouldn't worry me at all. I've got to say that you didn't sound like you were that worried.
But we're not just thinking why this guy really made me do enough of what he did.
John, we were driving through Brunswick, we saw the largest lawn dread in Australia and
we went, I wonder how they reacted, they got a call and it seemed like the sign has
been up for many, many years, it was faded, it was their claim to fame for 40 years or something.
We wondered how they responded if we gave them a call, John.
And the answer is, you didn't really give a shit. I'll be honest with you, John, when you asked me
how many machines we had, I had a hundred and forty-five
is high, isn't it?
Well, yeah, we haven't got anywhere near that,
but we've got more than any other laundry on it.
Well, good news is, there is no such places
along to Galaxy, you remain the biggest unchallenged
and I'll certainly know we'll be taking our dirty sheets.
Yeah, John will encourage all our listeners
to go to Alex Lauren, Draet, mate.
Okay, good on you.
Yes.
Okay, see you mate, bye.
Our worries, bye.
Bye.
Bye.
Hey, and we have ourselves a pickle.
Oh, no.
Oh, well, I mean, not only yum.
Yeah, but no, don't think you mean delicious pickle.
No, vinegar to cucumber.
Something from 2014 has come to our attention.
Very surfaced.
Very surfaced.
It's from Jeff the machine night.
Oh, who?
Jeff the machine.
From Canada.
A long time listener of the show.
And I'd probably say, one of the biggest participants from the listeners out there.
In terms of, especially because, you know, you go back to his history 10, 12, 13 years
ago when he really started actively contributing to the show, he would have the most the evidence of the longest
Contributed to the show and
He says we owe him a favor
And I challenged this so in digging to the archives with marshy and
Turns out we do owe him a favor and this was the discussion back in 2014
Jeff can have a favor he can ask of us.
Okay, that's nice, yeah, sure.
Better can't be forgot, Color Watch.
Yep, like it.
Is that how does that sound, Jeff?
I really like the sounds of that deal.
Yeah, okay, cool.
Just a favor.
And I mean, if it's outlandish,
we could always reject the favor.
Yeah, okay, exactly.
I like that.
It's nice to know that he'll have one up on us.
I mean, actually, can you reject,
in this sort of a deal,
can you reject favour?
Well, you can, if the favour is to kill someone,
we'll say no.
I can't believe it, Clif.
No, on a grounds that we're not going to have.
Did I still have a favour up there?
Oh, yeah, and he still gets the favour.
Interesting.
How many silly requests until he doesn't have the favour anymore?
Maybe gets, if we get the eras with him,
we probably will just not be friends.
So Jeff, you've got, probably roughly about five knockbacks.
You've got a favor until we knock it back five times.
But our permission can't be reasonably withheld.
So that's what we agreed to do.
This was him playing a game and he asked,
what am I playing for?
And that's when this whole favor idea came up.
Come on, but if we throw out a favor so casual now.
I know.
And so he is since written in and he says he would like to call in his favor seven years
on.
And the favor he's asking is he wants to be able to play a game for the chance to win an
eight coin coin.
Who gets to decide the game?
Or we would.
We could make up the game.
But is that my question to you is, does that do?
Does it dirty the eight coin coin?
Yeah.
And the other tricky thing is, does it create a situation where
everyone's wanting to play a game for night coin coin.
However, he's in the unique situation where he's the only person to mind
all just out there with one favor only.
Yeah.
So the show always in with favor.
Jack, how do you feel about it?
To me, I don't sure if we should be opening up coins just to random games.
Hmm.
I think, well, how hard can the game be though?
If you're making up the game, you can make it
near impossible. If you really want to hang on to the coin. Pete's a lot of it. Do we give him a go?
Pete's a lot of it for the chance to win an eight coin coin. Pete's a lot of it's a volatile game.
We know. We know. And it's a situation where you don't want to be caught in some sort of like photo finish
or slow motion replay because we have had situations where we've said to Pino what's
coming out of the oven and then he's gone margarita and we've gone, it doesn't sound like
that's what's next and what is next and he's gone on no pizza. You know, it doesn't sound like that's what's next. And you know, what is next?
And he's got no pizza.
You know, he chops and changes.
He chops and changes.
You never quite know what you're getting.
That's the fun of the pizza ladder when you're playing for a hat.
But when you're playing for a coin coin.
Too much.
Okay.
Could be too much.
Good thought.
Can we have a little want to think about something
that would be difficult to know?
We can reject the favor as we heard from our own discussion.
You don't have any of the cube left for you.
One of the hard cubes.
That's cube games.
That would be amazing.
If there is a second series, he can come out for an echoing chord in one of the hard
cube games.
Come out for one of the harder games.
What was the hardest game on the cube?
Like what do people just have no chance on?
It really just depended on. How hard it go. Did it get the games get harder or did the
pressure just get bigger and the games were the same? The game has got can get slightly harder,
but it depends on your skill set because a catching game would kind of be the same,
no, remember what level you're at. But if there was a hundred grand online, you'd generally
fluff it. I would say the hardest game was one called Deadstop,
where you basically had to throw a weighted ball
and learn that on a ledge and had to stop still.
Yeah.
And you had to go botchy style.
People would go to throw it normally
and would always roll off.
You had to throw a bit of backspin.
You had to put a little bit of backwards
by my opponent.
I can't.
But again, somehow set up Deadstop in Canada. For Jeff to just shoot little bit backwards from that moment. But again, somehow set up dead stop in Canada.
The Jeff, the shoot a bit and send it back to us.
Yes, that'd be tough.
Should we think about it?
Yeah, let's think about it.
Because I mean, the first love that comes into my head
is we like Face Home and we go, all right, Jeff,
go outside, get a tennis ball.
Oh, yeah.
Go outside now.
Just so it doesn't have chance to prepare.
Yep. You know, one shot, get a tennis ball. Oh yeah. Go outside, down, just so it doesn't have chance to prepare. Yep.
You know, one shot, get it down your chimney.
Oh, I like this.
I think this is better, this is better.
So what we need to do is,
we need to be that hard for the eight coin coin.
Let's make this a slow burn,
but if anyone is in Jeff's family or friend area,
please betray him, we'll not betray him.
Contact us and we can then organize a surprise game
that hopefully doesn't know about.
That's tough, isn't it?
It's tough because the first thing,
if I'm Jeff, first thing I do is go to you,
hey, contact the show and say you betraying me.
Feed me a rickian message.
Yeah, yeah, yeah, true.
Okay.
Well, isn't it a minute peg? Is he? Winnipeg? Something like that, yeah, yeah, true. Okay. Well, isn't it a minute peg?
Is he?
Winnipeg?
Something like that, yeah.
Gamma, though.
If you live in Winnipeg.
Well hang on, we don't know if he's...
LAUGHTER
I thought Calgary for some reason.
I was feeling an Ontario, actually, I was.
LAUGHTER
Okay.
So I think Mike's working hard outside to try and work out whereabouts he's from.
But again, how can we go into if we, if this is where we're heading with this, if we
get contacted by someone saying, I mean, one of those places, I can help you.
How do we know it's not an agent working for Jeff?
I just think we never will know that.
Yeah, true.
And then you've got to assume that he's got, don't know where he's tentacles go. Yeah in in Canada
Things are gonna be something where we can call him up and it's just like we can visually watch him. Yeah
Do it or not do it. Okay, so it's got to kind of work on Skype or I don't think we can
Spit board either I don't want on that thing
I think we have to come back we're gonna come back to it as a surprise in a future show
So you just go with thought of it off air sort of it during the week and we're going to come back to it as a surprise in a future show. So just go, we've thought of it off air, thought of it during the week, and we're doing this
right now.
Jeff, go outside, stand in the middle of the road, jump the next car that comes along.
Oh, whatever it is.
Yeah, great.
And we're watching on FaceTime celebrating and he'll find out.
And it will be in Winnipeg, I've just got confirmed.
At least in Winnipeg.
Yeah.
Was that your initial guess?
Yeah.
Well done, thanks mate.
Pfft!
Pfft!
Pfft!
Pfft!
Pfft!
Pfft!
Pfft!
G'day guys, Mike here.
Welcome to the end of another episode.
Just one little plug for Hamish and Andy's Remembring project.
Season two is well underway.
Season one is all there for you to binge.
Here's a clip from this week's episode,
where the boys remember a high profile guess
with a not-so-high profile catchphrase.
2000 and 10.
Buzz Aldrin was on the show.
He also was a touch-boring.
I was so excited with both love space.
And look, we have his walk on the moon.
He's walked on the moon. I mean, on the moon. He was in first. He knows that.
Yeah.
I think I do. I do. We do. I mean, it's unbelievable to have Buzz Aldrin on the show.
But of course, one small set for man, one giant left for mankind went down with one of the greatest lines in the most watched moment of human history. Yeah. And you could tell it Earth buzzer bit.
Yeah.
Because he also had a line.
It bugged buzzer bit because he kept trying to be the
conversation back to where he said, and that's of course,
when I out of my line, it's just desolate tranquility.
Yeah.
It was something like peaceful tranquility.
Yeah.
Like peaceful desolation or something.
I mean, again, it doesn't stick, it doesn't stick.
But he had a line like that, that he mentioned a few times.
And that was the name of his book.
And he's like, he's saying, you know, of course, like on that second,
space walk we're out in the sea of tranquility, picking up our rocks, and that's where I
had the famous line.
Yeah.
Not that famous.
It's just beautiful desolation.
What is the famous line like?
I think it's magnificent desolation.
Magnificent desolation.
Again, again, doesn't once fall step.
That's where I...
That's so much better.
And so you guys are probably wondering
where I came up with the line magnificent desolation.
And it really just came to me in the moment.
No.
It's just sort of two words.
There you have it, guys.
That was Buzz Aldrin's very not famous quote.
Hey Mission Andy's remembering project is full of great moments like that.
Check it out wherever you listen to this podcast, it's out every Monday.
Season one is there to binge, season two, episodes coming out every week.
We'll catch you next week for the main part.
Thanks for listening.
The Hamish Nandy podcast will return next week.
Catch up or contribute at hamishanandie.com.