Handsome - MUNA asks about early gay experiences
Episode Date: June 4, 2024MUNA asks a question about early gay experiences to kick off Pride Month on Handsome! Tig, Mae and Fortune tell some incredible stories about rolling down hills and playing in dirt piles, plu...s a Handsome parade float, New Orleans attics, and more!Handsome is hosted by Tig Notaro, Mae Martin, and Fortune FeimsterFollow us on social media: @handsomepodMerch: handsomepod.comWatch on youtube: youtube.com/@handsomepodEmail the show: handsomepod@gmail.comSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.
Transcript
Discussion (0)
Some people just know the best rate for you is a rate based on you with Allstate.
Nothing is more handsome than safe driving.
It's why any time I'm out there on the road, I drive carefully and cautiously at all times.
The more safely you drive, the less you'll pay.
Who doesn't want to pay a rate based on your own safe driving?
You're in good hands with Allstate.
Not available in Alaska or California, subject to terms and conditions.
Rates vary by state.
In some states, participation in DriveWise allows All State to use your driving data
for rating and your rate could increase with high-risk driving.
Well, it's Pride Month and we have got your Pride gear covered with our new Hansome Pride
belt bag.
What's gayer than a fanny pack?
I'm very excited about it.
Go to HansomPod.com and get yours before they sell out.
We got a brand new belt bag as well as a bunch
of other fun merch for you to enjoy this pride.
That's handsomepod.com.
Happy pride everyone.
Handsome pod.
Chatting with friends on the handsome pod.
Chatting with friends on the handsome pod.
Cheers. And welcome to the handsome pod. Cheers.
Cheers.
And welcome to the handsome pod.
It's me, Mae Martin.
I'm joined as always by my very handsome co-host.
Tig Notaro.
And Fortune Feimster.
Ha ha ha.
The intensity that you said your name there, Tig.
You sure did it.
You're staring into camera.
Oh, I am excited to be on film.
Yeah, here we are all together in the same room.
I'm feeling extra gay today.
Why?
Flannel.
Yeah, we're kind of pretty gay right now, right?
Still handsome.
I'm just wearing my normal clothes.
Well, I'm in flannel.
You both kind of have the jean thing going on.
Well, and I was telling May,
I don't want to embarrass you,
but there are holes in your shirt
and we can see your body.
Isn't that kind of a cool thing to do?
I don't think so.
I promise there are real holes from probably moths.
And like it's a-
You promise those are from moths?
I promise it's from moths. is it from make those yourself didn't make
them myself I feel like it holes and clothes are cool right now really I mean
I don't have it also may your hair's a little messed up Wow I feel like maybe
you need a propeller hat on I need to get it together I've also undone my
pants cuz I got my that's what our listeners want though, the ones on YouTube right now. Yeah, if you are just listening to the audio, switch over to YouTube right now. May's pants are undone. I'm fully nude. No shoes. Moths have eaten your shirt. Yeah. And hair is just tousled all around. But the tousled hair is your thing.
I know, I'm just trying to create a.
Like crazy frizzy curly hair is my thing.
I wouldn't say you're this crazy frizzy,
it's a beautiful. It's pretty wild.
Speaking of moths, do you guys know the moth,
have you ever heard of the Mothman prophecies?
Oh, I thought you meant like the moth storytelling.
I've done that, I've told a moth story.
The moth is a storytelling.
That's correct.
You've listened to it.
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
What's the moth man?
Okay, the moth man,
and I'm gonna get all the deets wrong.
Maybe Thomas can back me up,
but it was this phenomenon where people were seeing.
Mayfact. Mayfact.
They were seeing a large man slash moth,
like a moth man hybrid,
before big disasters would happen.
So before a bridge collapsed, multiple people go,
we saw multiple people go.
Multiple people.
They go, you're a mess today, Meg.
But they're like, we saw this mothman,
and it went on for a few years.
Dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun.
Mothman. And then Richard Gere was in a movie about it. Really? Yeah. I never saw that. went on for a few years. Dinnininininininininininininininininininininininininininininininininininininininininininininininininininininininininininininininininininininininininininininininininininininininininininininininininininininininininininininininininininininininininininininininininininininininininininininininininininininininininininininininininininininininininininininininininininininininininininininininininininininininininininininininininininininininininininininininininininininininininininininininininininininininininininininininininininininininininininininininininininininininininininininininininininininininininininininininininininininininininininininininininininininininininininininininininininininininininininininininininininininininininininininininininininininininininininininininininininininininininininininininininininininininininininininininininininininininininininininininininininininininininininininininininininininininininininininininininininininininininininininininininininininin ninin n n n n n n n n n n n n n n n n n n n n n n n n n n n n n n n n n n n n n n n n n n n n n n n n n n n n n n n n n n n n n n n n n n n n n n n n n n n n n n n n n n n n n n n n n n n n n n n n n n n n n n n n n n n n n n n n n n n n n n n n n n n n n n n n n n n n n n n n n n n n n n n n n n n n n n n n n n n n n n n n n n n n n n n n n n n n n n n n n n n n n n n n n n n n at the disasters or was he causing the disaster? Therein lies the question. Therein lies the rub.
See, I'm not smart enough to have come up with the question.
Or anything really.
But to be like, oh, maybe he's causing this.
Cause I just immediately go to, it's not true.
I just assume the Mothman's just putting holes
in people's clothing.
They'd be giant cause he he's man-sized.
Yeah, I have a couple of suits right now
with some little moth bites,
and I didn't realize I needed to store those suits properly.
So you gotta get moth balls, though, right?
Yeah, I think so.
Why are moths going in closets?
They like suits.
And wool, they love wool.
But why is it always closets?
Yeah, why aren't they just munching on like a towel?
I don't know.
Why don't they go munch on something else?
Yeah.
Yeah.
But I mean really.
Speaking of munchers.
It's Pride Month.
Jesus.
Fortune.
Was that a weird transition?
I liked it.
I liked it.
It's Pride Month!
Happy Pride Month!
Happy Pride to our community out there.
Yeah, we dressed.
We dressed for the season.
We actually didn't plan this.
Just to reiterate, I'm wearing my normal clothes.
I don't know, you got flannel and denim.
And this really is just my normal clothes as well.
And I look normal too.
We're all just being ourselves,
which is the beauty of Pride Month,
and celebrating us being exactly who we are,
and celebrating loving who we want.
How about that, guys?
Do you think if we had a float at the parade,
what would it be shaped like?
Ooh, what would it it well it would be us
Are you talking about like a handsome float?
On a boob! Would be just straddling the boob
Trying to hold on
There's no handles, no foot pegs
Just blade
We're just cheering each other
And we're also holding on to each other to stay on the boob.
And they've covered the boob in Vaseline, so we're slipping and sliding dollops.
They didn't, you did.
I did, I did.
We might have to be on a Pride parade float at some point.
I would love that.
I hope they can make a boob.
Yeah, a paper mache? Is that like a giant paper mache thing?
Why not?
Yeah, I used to go, you know, in my hometown in Mississippi,
they have like a local Mardi Gras parade,
and my family would have a float, and I just wonder.
A family float?
Yeah.
Did all families have their own float?
Yeah, I've not heard of this.
That's cool. Really? Yeah, I've not heard of this. Really?
Yeah, I didn't know families just had a float.
Like, here come the Smiths.
I thought it would be like.
Or whatever.
Like a business.
Yeah, your fami, fami.
Fami has a float.
Fami.
The fami float.
This is my fami.
What are you like advertising your family?
Yeah, or you're just floating around. Really, but is that typical Mardi Gras This is my fami. What are you like advertising your family? Yeah.
Or you're just floating around.
Really, but is that typical Mardi Gras
that families have floats?
You can have a business, you can have whatever.
You just get in, it's a small town.
Okay, it's a small town, yeah of course.
And so I just wonder how they would feel
if I suggested my.
Your fami got on a boob. My friend Your family got on a boob?
My friend family got on a boob.
So were you throwing beads, and dents, and balloons?
Got it.
Now at the family parade, do people show their boobies
when you throw beads?
Well, yeah.
They do in Mississippi?
I mean, come on.
That's true.
What else do we got to do down there?
What else do you got to do?
We got to see some rooms.
No, I think that's way more for New Orleans.
That's the New Orleans thing.
Have you gone to Mardi Gras?
In New Orleans, no.
I went to Sydney in Australia, there, Mardi Gras.
Does that count?
No.
That's cool.
That's the biggest one in the world, right?
Yeah, that one's huge.
I know Jennifer Coolidge.
I know her, but not like we hang out.
Get her on the pod.
I know, but I don't have her number.
We'll figure out. OK.
We'll get her on the pod. I've been to her house down there.
Well, that was what I was about to say.
She has a yeah or had.
I don't know. She's very busy now.
She used to have
a really cool Halloween party every Halloween
and in New Orleans and my friends have gone
and I was like, every time I see pictures,
I'm like, I wanna go to that party.
I can say, if there's one ticket I want,
it's Jennifer Coolidge's Halloween party in New Orleans
and the fact that people are going to a different city
just for a party.
Yeah, well, because she dresses up very extravagantly.
Were you there at her house on Halloween
or just in general?
No, I was there for a dinner
and I was invited to the Halloween party after that.
Okay.
And then I replied to the invitation.
I think she told me two years later.
Oh, you did?
You replied two years later?
Saying I couldn't make it.
That's really funny.
Yeah.
Tig, we really missed you at the party.
But I also.
Hey that was a good Jennifer Coolidge.
We really missed you at the party, Tig.
It is interesting.
That was good.
Tig, we missed you at the party.
And we really missed you at the party, Tig.
I don't think she missed me.
But she did take me into her attic.
Oh, okay.
Tell me my attic.
I got something to show you.
It'd be real fun.
It'd be real fun.
I got something to show you in my attic.
We do these impressions out of pure love
for Jennifer Coolidge, because she's the best.
Well, yeah.
What was in the attic?
Like mannequins and wheelchairs and stuff.
What?
And that's what should be in an attic in New Orleans.
Yeah.
I ran into her at a restaurant in New Orleans
probably a couple years ago,
and she brought that up.
You remember when you came in my attic?
Remember I showed you the mannequins?
And the wheelchairs?
Were you like, yep, I remember that. Yeah
So but it is interesting to think about her living
Down there
and then
She's blown up so much
Like since she got that house and I think she was living a pretty quiet
New Orleans life.
I mean as quiet as a New Orleans life is.
Quiet but having massive parties
and taking people up to her attic.
And Parker Posey I think lives on a farm somewhere
and she's about to be on White Lotus.
Oh yeah, they're filming this new season
I think in Thailand.
My favorite thing about that show, of course,
is the cameos from Survivor contestants,
because Mike White was on Survivor.
Oh yeah.
He puts like.
He was on Survivor.
I forgot that.
He got to the final three.
Oh wow.
Wait, what do you mean?
He was a contestant.
They had a celebrity edition,
or that's the normal edition.
Normal edition.
And how did he get on that?
He was a fan and he applied
and this is after School of Rock,
which he wrote and was in,
but it was before he was.
The white kids had watched this 10 times.
Really?
That's so good.
Yeah, and he did very well on it.
He was hilarious on it.
And so in his shows,
he'll sometimes put a cameo from like
a very niche survivor contestant from 15 years ago.
Oh, interesting. I didn't know that. I think he should put Parvati on as like a very niche survivor contestant from 15 years ago. Oh, interesting.
I didn't know that.
I think you should put Parvati on
as like a sexy yoga teacher.
That's right.
I would have loved to have gone
because you know, it's my dream to,
if I was on the lam to Thailand.
Thailand.
Yeah, remember that?
Washing elephants, was that right?
Yeah.
The elephant sanctuary.
Right, you wanna go wash elephants.
I wanna wash any Pad Thai.
In silence.
No one will find you.
Filming White Lotus at the same time would have been great.
You're going to be there anyway.
It's so top secret.
Where oh where did fortune go?
Well the best part about that show for the actors is they, the last few seasons they filmed at like very nice resorts
and they like stay there at the resort.
Yeah.
And then film there.
But I think they do it like in an off season.
Uh huh.
So.
Do you take your kids to pride parades and stuff?
We were in Colorado and there was,
this wasn't a pride parade,
but it was just a little tiny mountain town parade
that went by.
And uh. It was just a bunch of lesbians and Subaru it just they came off the mountain in their
Subaru's just to have a parade well it's funny because I see the parade going by
we're coming out of a coffee shop and I was like a parade and I start running and in my head I'm thinking
oh I must love a parade I didn't realize but there's something so I mean so
nostalgic or something about
well so appealing about a small town parade
yeah for sure
I mean more so than like oh the Macy's parade or whatever any of those big parades are. It's like a small town parade with like a trailer
and like the town drunk and like flags and you know.
There is something really sweet,
like it makes me proud of human beings that were like,
let's have a parade.
I know.
It's just like we walk down the street,
like waving at each other.
Hawking.
And the gays especially love a parade.
Yeah.
I didn't know I loved a parade
until that little parade went by.
I think also because I have kids.
I was trying to get them to see the parade.
I kind of forget about it too
and then a lot of times I've been on tour
during Pride Month, not really thinking about
it being Pride weekend at different places
where I'm performing and I'll like come out of the hotel
and then there's the parade.
And I'm like, oh my God, it's Pride weekend or whatever.
And I'll start watching these floats go by
and I get a little emotional sometimes.
Like I'll be like, I love it,
because it'll be in some of these random smaller cities
where you know, you hear about the New York one
and the LA, Chicago, San Francisco, they're just so big.
But then you see these smaller towns
having these gay pride parades
where the representation's smaller
and you're probably looking over your shoulder a bit more
and to see that coming through town,
there is something very moving about that.
We're still in a time where there's like laws
about don't say gay in classrooms
and like it's still so important that
yeah, to have that visibility I guess.
I just got really serious but,
I think I've talked on the podcast about
flying to like a rural pride parade.
They paid me to fly to this tiny town, Sudbury.
I don't think you've talked about this.
Where they have, they're famous
because they have a giant nickel.
They got a giant coin. Oh yeah?
I don't think they're that famous.
You haven't heard about this?
No, I don't know if anyone's talking about it.
But everyone claims they're famous.
You don't even know the name of the town.
Yeah, it's a big nickel.
Some people just know the best rate for you
is a rate based on you with Allstate.
I think we can all agree that if you're a safe driver, like I am, you shouldn't have
to pay the same auto insurance rate as other less safe drivers.
The more safely you drive, the less you'll pay.
Who doesn't want to pay a rate based on your own safe driving?
You're in good hands with Allstate, not available in Alaska or California,
subject to terms and conditions.
Rates vary by state.
In some states, participation in DriveWise allows Allstate
to use your driving data for rating,
and your rate could increase with high-risk driving.
Dear cat people, we know you're obsessed
with your feline companions.
Admit it, if we looked at your camera roll,
it would be 90% pictures of your cat.
You give them the best, but if you're honest,
you struggle to keep their litter box clean.
Well, have you heard of litter robot?
Yes, I have.
In fact, I have one and it has really turned
this ship around.
We got Kitty City at our house, three adorable cats and
the litter robot. Oh my gosh. It's so easy. These kitties go in there. They do their little business.
They come out. This robot cleans things up and
it's gone. That's it. It's gone. As a special offer to listeners of the show, go to
That's it. It's gone. As a special offer to listeners of the show, go to stop scooping.com slash handsome and
enter promo code handsome to save an extra $50 on any Litter Robot bundle. That's an
extra $50 off any Litter Robot bundle at stop scooping.com slash handsome and enter promo
code handsome at checkout. Stop scooping.com slash handsome and enter promo code handsome.
This is in the UK?
No, this is in the UK?
No, this is in Canada.
And I flew with my friend, Alex.
They brought us down and it was like,
there was a BDSM tutorial in an Italian restaurant
in the basement.
There's all these families eating upstairs
being like, ah, these ruffians.
And then, yeah, then there was a foam party
in like a coffee shop.
Foam? Yeah foam. Is that like where people are wrestling in their bathing suits?
The second episode in a row that we've talked about foam. Not foam in your pants.
But foam is like kind of like jello wrestling but with foam. Oh do you guys
not know about foam parties? No what are foam parties? It's like you put a
essentially a giant paddling pool in a club,
so you're covering the floor with plastic,
and then you got a foam machine,
and everyone's just dancing.
People are kinda in their underwear.
In their bathing suit?
Oh, underwear.
Yeah, bathing suit, or you just get wet,
and there's foam everywhere.
It always starts off great, really fun,
and then by the end, there's just this gray water
that you're splashing around in.
Oh no, pink eye.
Do you think Jax would get into that?
No, God no.
I'm not even into that.
I don't like being in my clothes and getting wet.
Because then it's just uncomfortable, and I'm shaving.
Well, you would not have enjoyed
what we watched over spring break.
Was it a phone party?
No, they're like at the end of the ski season in Colorado,
people were going down the mountain,
just and everybody dressing up in a costume,
and there is a huge pond of water
and then you ramp.
In the snow.
Oh, yeah, it's like 15 degrees.
Okay.
And you just have your skis on.
So you go down the mountain and then into the water
and you try and go across the pond on your skis.
Oh, that's cool.
You ski down and then try and ski across the water.
Break my leg.
I'm on board.
That's cool.
I don't know how to ski though.
Me neither.
What about you don't ski or snowboard?
I don't know how to do either.
Two against one.
You're good at those?
I used to and then I had an accident.
You got to be.
Classic take.
It seems dangerous.
It's so dangerous.
Yeah.
Yeah. In Canada Canada everyone does it,
but my parents, they were really permissive,
but this was the one thing they were like,
you're not allowed to ski.
Interesting.
Yeah, because they knew too many people,
they just hit a tree.
And that was it.
They knew, yeah.
Really?
Multiple people that hit a tree.
Multiple people that happened to?
What's back up?
Couple of people, yeah, who just hit trees.
A couple of people, wow.
Yeah.
That is crazy.
Do they live?
I know.
It doesn't sound like it.
I know one of them didn't,
and then I know there were other,
and I think my mom when she was a kid
put skis on and day one broke her ankle,
and so she was like, what is this sport?
Yeah, what is this?
What is this?
I did go cross-country skiing though.
But is that, oh, that's just kind of like, just sort of walk skiing cross-country.
It's skinning.
Ma'am.
Yeah?
But this is like.
Did you just respond to it by going, ma'am, that was good.
Ma'am, I need you to pipe down over there.
Ha ha ha ha ha.
Yeah, cross-country skiing is like speed walking,
like you get real sweaty, yeah.
Yeah, you're not like going down a hill, right?
No, it's flat across.
It's supposed to be like the best exercise you can get.
Yeah, calming.
A lot of work, and you're cold.
I don't like being cold either.
No, me neither really.
No, I thought you said last episode you like being cold.
I prefer it to being hot.
But I don't like, I wanna be a normal temperature.
You would prefer it to be cold.
You'd prefer to be freezing over sweltering.
I'd rather be hot.
I wanna keep my house cold.
I wanna sleep under a big duvet.
I wanna be ideally wearing a sweater.
Oh. You know what I mean?
Sexy.
Oh, I know what you mean.
Sweater.
Oh yeah, sweater under the blanket.
Maybe a little turtle neck.
You got a sexy sweater on over there.
Look at you, you're just looking around.
What is happening?
Sexy, you got a sweater.
Maybe a scarf.
Why did a sweater become sexy?
Oh my God, that sweater's so sexy.
Jennifer Coolidge is back.
This is like a hybrid.
Of what?
I don't know.
You know, I find most things like sexy or attractive
and the one thing I don't love is turtlenecks on people.
It's a big turn off for me.
I like a turtleneck.
I like to see the neck.
I like to see the neck.
I don't think about it,
so I can't say two against one for either of you.
Why don't you spend some time and think about it?
I wanna think about it.
I wanna feel about it.
Picture Jax in a turtleneck, how do you feel?
She's gorgeous.
Yeah, she's gorgeous in anything.
Oh, that's true.
I think I just.
She's never worn a turtle, no, wait.
Turtleneck.
I don't remember.
Yeah, it makes me feel itchy.
So what would you do if Parvati showed up
in a turtleneck, would you cry?
Because I know your ex-girl, it makes me feel itchy. So what would you do if Parvati showed up in a turtleneck? Would you cry?
Because I know your ex-girlfriend showed up with red hair. And I burst into tears.
No, I would probably over-complement it
because I'd be trying to hide the fact that I felt.
Oh, I really love that.
It makes me feel itchy and hot to even look at it
and I think I'd be like, where'd you get that?
I love it.
So I'd.
Where'd you get that? I love it.
And then I'd set some moths on it when she wasn't looking.
Yeah, there you go.
You can never get the moths when you want the moths.
I know.
They only go when you don't want them there.
So frustrating.
So frustrating. You make a good point.
Thank you.
Where are the moths when you need them?
Come on.
I am curious, in past Pride Months,
do y'all, I guess more in your single days,
do you feel like you were more active during Pride Month?
I used to work at a coffee shop in West Hollywood
called Little Fritas.
Okay, pretty little Freitas.
And it was like, I mean, it's kind of a very famous,
people call it a lesbian coffee shop,
but the owner was like, it wasn't a lesbian,
it was a coffee shop, there were a lot of lesbians there.
But so it was a lesbian coffee shop.
And it was right there on Santa Monica Boulevard and I took that job
because they had a comedy show there.
And that's where I've heard.
You were like, I wanna get close to that.
Well, that was the first place I did stand up
and so I thought, oh well, I'll work once or twice a week
so I can for sure,
if somebody drops out I can get up on stage.
I like that, that's got a very Bob Dylan energy of like,
just I'll just hang out and jump up and blow everyone away.
You're making a latte, oh, you have a spot open?
Well, I'm available.
I happen to know a few jokes.
But yeah, so that was there on Santa Monica Boulevard
and the parade would go by.
And so I think I, no, I haven't been very active
in the gay pride parades.
Or no, just the weekends.
Sometimes there's like festivities.
Or in the month there's different pride events.
I feel like I'm always the person that leaves my house
and is like, what is all of this traffic?
And then it's like some.
There's a rainbow flag everywhere.
Yeah, it's like gay pride.
I'm like, oh my God, it's gay pride.
Or it's the marathon or something.
I don't drive too much.
Every time you do, there's a parade. Every time you do, there's a parade.
Every time I do, there's a parade.
I used to all through my 20s,
in Toronto, the parade's massive.
And you get, the prime minister usually comes
and Trudeau these days, he's right at the front
of the parade.
And then you have a relationship with him.
Me and Trudeau?
Yeah.
Well, we had a moment.
Yeah, yeah.
I told him his legacy would be great.
I really regret it.
Cause he's really done some bad stuff too,
but I used to go all through my twenties
and then like all weekend,
it would be wild and fun dance parties.
And then one time my friend Gabby,
who's ostensibly straight and she would always
come in support and she was just like the best
and like cared deeply and she'd come to the dyke march always
and she had this sign one year that said
an army of lovers will never be defeated
and for some reason she was just like invisible
to all my lesbian friends at the time.
They were so cliquey and they'd be like,
who are you again?
And she'd be like, I meet you every year at the dyke march.
I come in support, I'm Gabby, I'm your,
and they'd be like, oh yeah, that girl, and then one time
we were leaving the parade and she got mugged,
and she was like, she thought that these two people
were finally being real nice to her.
They got on either side of her and kind of sandwiched her
and she was like, woo!
And they mugged her at the parade?
They took her wallet, they took everything,
and she was just holding the sign about the army of lovers,
she'd glitter on and she was just like.
Wow.
Were these gay people that robbed her?
I think so.
Oh, that's good.
Well this is a terrible gay crime.
Sorry, sorry, sorry.
I just, you know, to go back to the small town parade,
I know we're trying to stay on track here,
but I just, I'm not, I don't like big crowds.
Yeah, me too.
I just, I like a weird trailer wobbling down the road with, you know, a dog. I just I just I like a weird trailer Wobbling down the road with yeah
Like that, I don't like not knowing where the nearest bathroom is where I can wash my wash my face, okay
Yeah, I just remember being so blown away by like moving to LA and I wasn't out yet when I first moved here
And totally kept it under wraps. No one knew.
And I was at home and that's when they used,
I don't know if they still do,
the local channel had the Pride Parade on
and I was like, oh, what is this about?
You know, cause that was starting.
Did you know you were gay?
No, it was like bubbling up, I think,
you know, like where I was like, hmm.
And I went down there and it was like bubbling up I think, you know, like where I was like, hmm And I went down there and I was it was so overwhelming because
Once you're in the world, you're just like, oh, yeah, it's a bad brain
But if you're not in the world, you're new to it. It's so
Overwhelming and so even if you've been in the world, it's over
And I like walk towards it and and I mean I was I can't, I can't, I can't.
I walked right back to my car.
Because it was overwhelming or because of the gay stuff?
Well I was by myself again.
Oh boy.
Oh boy.
I was back in town from Miami.
I was back by myself.
I was back from Miami.
It's easier when you have a friend with you, you know?
Because you're just like chatting with your friend.
Like, oh, it's for now.
On the handsome pod.
Yeah.
But alone, it was, I was like, I can't do,
I'm not ready for this.
Yeah.
Yeah.
But then once I came out, I was-
How soon after that did you come out?
It took me another two years.
Whoa. Yeah.
And then-
Did you make a couple of trips down
to peek at the parade again?
No, and I didn't go to another parade until I played in the, um, gay games.
It's like the Olympics.
It's the game.
You hadn't come out yet.
I know I had come.
Oh, I was like, Oh boy.
I was now out playing softball and I've played softball with you, I think.
Yeah, probably with Paige and all those folks.
But I was in a league and we would travel around the country
playing softball in this lesbian softball league.
And my team decided to play in the gay games,
which is like the Olympics, but for gay people.
And we played in Chicago and there was...
It was like the Olympics are pretty gay.
Yeah, true.
It was the first time I was like,
they had these massive events and gatherings
and I was like a kid in the candy store then.
I was like, oh my God, I love parades, I love,
this is the greatest.
Also, can you imagine like before the internet and stuff,
like now young people can find their community so easily,
but before that, you gotta go to the parade and be like,
yeah, here I am.
Yeah, you had to go to Gay Bar's.
It was the one place you could meet people.
It was hard to meet people.
I used to go to coffee shops to meet people.
I just didn't meet people for a while.
Why are you in Miami?
But on the flip side of that, it was jarring
to be at that first parade and see that section of people
with all the hateful signs telling you
when they're going to hell.
I really remember just being so taken back by that
because the parade was such a
beautiful day of like love and celebration and fun and then you keep walking and all of a sudden
It's like you're going to hell all these people screaming things
Let's say you are going to hell
But I'm just saying like, okay, so we're all going to hell. Why are you yelling at us? Yeah. Isn't it enough? It's like, or
have some sympathy. Like we're going to hell. Yeah. You know, let's enjoy life on earth.
Yeah. Why would you ever? That's hilarious. Yell and scream at people. You're going to hell. Yeah, you know, let's enjoy life on earth. Yeah. Why would you ever? That's hilarious.
Yell and scream at people. You're going to hell.
I've never even thought about it like that.
I haven't either. And so we are going to hell.
I'm like, OK, so enjoy our journey.
Yeah. Or like maybe be compassionate because, oh, my God, we're going to hell.
Yeah, because they're usually spouting some Bible verse while they're telling us.
So where is the compassion?
Yeah.
Who knew that a better pillowcase is all you need for better sleep?
Let's talk about practicing self-care while you sleep.
Set yourself up for better sleep with Blissie's award-winning 100% mulberry silk pillowcases.
There are a lot of dupes out there that claim satin can be an alternative to silk,
but that's not the case.
Satin is made from synthetic fibers like polyester,
while silk is a luxurious, all-natural fiber.
The Blissy pillowcase really is awesome.
When you have curly hair like mine,
you wake up with it looking insane.
And having this kind of silk pillowcase, I know my hair is getting the best treatment
possible while I'm sleeping and I don't wake up with that insane rat's nest.
Everybody loves them.
They have a lot of different prints and colors and they make great gifts because there's
an option for literally anyone.
They have over 1 million raving fans and
you could be one of those fans. Try now risk free for 60 nights at blissy.com slash handsome and get
an additional 30% off. That's blissy.com slash handsome and use code handsome to get an additional
30% off. Your skin and hair will thank you. This year I'm officially moving on from my cheap razor era and getting the premium razor
that my body deserves.
Athena Club is truly the best razor on the market, and here's why.
First of all, the Athena Club razor kit is an absolute steal at just $10.
You also get a game-changing magnetic hook in the razor kit for easy storage.
And don't forget the quality of the shave.
Athena Club's razor glides effortlessly thanks to those five precision
engineered blades. Oh man, do I love this razor.
And I love that little hook to hang it up because whenever I used to put a
razor down on my bathtub or shower, that little, uh, I don't know.
That's like a sticky, slimy thing on the razor would stick to the bathtub.
Ready to upgrade your shaving experience?
Switch to the best razor on the market
and show your skin you care with Athena Club.
Head over to athenaclub.com
to try their award-winning razor and body products
and get 20% off your purchase
with code HANNESOME at checkout.
You can also find Athena Club Razors
at your local Target store, trust me.
You won't look back, happy shaving.
Yeah, I've kind of always been out.
Like I always think about when I date someone
who's it's new for them and especially like Parv is,
you know, this is also, it must be so weird
to suddenly at a later stage in your life, be like,
oh, there's like, yeah, countries in the world
where I'd go to jail for like,
I think to have that cognitive shift of like,
suddenly being in-
Or be killed.
Yeah, suddenly be like in a minority group
having never been, that's kind of interesting.
Mm-hmm, yeah.
Yeah, it's kind of interesting.
It's kind of interesting.
It's kind of interesting.
Yeah, not fully interesting, but kind of.
Kind of.
But you know, honestly, I mean, I've thought about it.
Like, I feel like I was never, have never been happier than when I came out and post that.
Yeah.
Like, my life is the best version of itself once I realized who I was.
Yeah, same.
And came out.
And if someone asked me right now, if you could choose, if you truly could choose to be gay or not,
what would you choose?
And if it was a choice, which it is not for me,
I would choose to be gay.
I would choose to be gay a thousand times over.
It's better.
For me, but that's, you know.
But yeah, I mean it's been. How do you know if it's better a thousand times, but that's, you know, but yeah, I mean, it's been.
How do you know if it's better a thousand times over?
You haven't even.
Because I tried to be straight.
But you haven't even touched a straight body part.
I touched one wiener.
You told us you had never touched.
No, this I can back up, fortune has touched one wiener.
I can't.
Thank you, Mae.
Mae was there.
Oh right, I was there. I talked about it in the standup in my half hourer. I know, thank you, Mae. Mae was there. Oh, right. I was there.
I talked about it in the standup
in my half hour special.
I forgot.
I touched one wiener.
My point to it was I wish I hadn't said
I had touched one wiener,
because then it was easy for people in my hometown
to figure out who's wiener was.
Who's wiener was.
Yeah, one wiener.
I gave a bad handy J. I don't even know if you could call it a handy
J. What you just did with your hands.
It's a crab clawing right now.
It definitely wasn't a full handy.
Can you keep doing that?
But I'm doing this because it really was more of this, like a Play-Doh situation.
How many times has Fortune turned the microphone into...
Into a winger?
This is a fluke.
Not enough time.
My joke was I grabbed it like a hot clarinet.
Because I didn't want to touch it for too long.
Well sure.
So I grabbed it like this.
Like a hot clarinet.
I would also choose it as well,
because I feel like,
grateful to have any kind of outsider perspective
in the world,
because it just makes you a little bit more open-minded
and curious maybe about other things.
And any type of outsidersness,
I think is ultimately like,
it's like, it makes you,
then you start pulling the thread of like,
what else isn't true that I've been told? It's like, it makes you, then you start pulling the thread of like, what else isn't true that I've been told is like,
anyway, anyway, winners.
Anyway, Fortune and her winners.
I just think gays have a lot of fun.
You know what I mean?
There's that song, Girls Just Wanna Have Fun.
Well guess what, gays also.
That's good.
Just wanna have fun.
Fortune, that is good.
Oh wait, that's good.
Thomas.
If we are going to hell, we're gonna enjoy the party.
Thomas, yeah, write that down. and that is good. Thomas? If we are going to hell, we're gonna enjoy the day.
Write that down.
Gays they wanna have fun.
Speaking of gay, guys, our guests today.
Are not.
Are not.
No, I'm so excited to have a question from Muna, the band,
who have really mobilized a young queer sort of fan base like no other.
Amazing.
They were opening for Taylor Swift on tour for a while.
They're very fun and cool people.
They're so good.
Yes, today's question comes from the explosively wonderful
pop trio Muna, you know them, you love them.
I'm pumped to have a question from them.
You got Katie, Josette, and Naomi.
They opened for Taylor Swift on the Eras Tour.
They have a bunch of hit songs, including Silk Chiffon
with the Phoebe Bridgers music video.
They also have a very funny podcast called Gayotic.
Muna is asking our question today.
Muna, Muna, Muna, Muna is asking our question today. Boom! Muna! Muna, Muna, Muna, Muna!
Hi Handsome Podcast.
Uh, I'm Katie.
I'm Naomi.
I'm Joseph.
Together we are the band Muna, world famous for not only our music, but also our, um,
our podcast.
Chaotic.
Indeed.
Um, and we have a question for you today. We talk about this a lot on our
pod and we're very curious to hear about any early memories that you guys have where you
got the first inclination that you might, I was going to say that you might be a little
funny. You might be a little funny as in a little bit gay.
And not the other way that you're funny.
Funny as in strange.
And it can be something that maybe induced a familiar feeling such as shame, or it could
be something that was like fun and exciting.
It can be something with a friend
or something with a character on TV,
really, sky's the limit.
Just talk about being gay and young.
If I don't stop the video, my arm's gonna fall off.
I've been shaking the whole time.
So goodbye, we love you guys.
Enjoy answering our riveting inquiries.
Oh.
The first thing that popped into my mind was like, I used to play tons of like imaginative games with my friends and I was usually
Han Solo or something and yeah. And then in grade one,
and I was little in, I was like a year younger in grade,
I was like five maybe or just turned six. Uh,
and me and my friend Karen were playing
this pippy long stocking game under a table
on lunch or something.
And we were, I was tiny.
And she was playing pippy long stocking.
I was playing like some cool boy.
And I kissed her hand.
Like it was like a romantic scene we were doing kind of.
I kissed her hand and someone saw it,
someone in our class.
And I went to an all girls school
and they were like,
may kiss Karen, ew.
And they like dragged us to the teacher
and were like, may kiss Karen,
what the hell?
Oh my God.
Yeah, and Mrs. Reiki, God bless her soul,
was like, what is wrong with this class?
Like, get a life,
let may kiss Karen turn.
Yo prudes,
she said that.
Yeah, yeah.
But it was definitely like, oh,
like it cognitively was like a shift.
Like a shame feeling.
Yeah, so it's like, oh, I don't, yeah, yeah, maybe that.
Yeah.
And then a sex dream about hocus pocus,
which I saw in the movie theaters.
I've talked about it before.
I saw it like six times maybe in the theaters.
Like I was obsessed and then had,
I was a perv for it.
I used to be like, I hope I have that dream.
But which part of it made you horny?
It was all-
Poor Chad.
I mean, I'm curious, cause they're-
It was all three of the witches
and the way they're stealing the soul of the,
they're all surrounding this.
I mean, it's fucked up.
Like it's not a, it wasn't a consciously horny thing.
I was just a kid and I was like,
I want them to kidnap me and steal my soul.
And in the dream, I was naked.
And I was like six, but I was like,
I remember telling my parents, I had this dream.
I hope I have it again.
I was naked and these witches were eating my butt.
Like it was like,
It ate my ass.
No, but like it was a meatloaf, like cutting slices off it.
Oh.
And I was like, I kinda liked that dream.
Meg, what is happening?
I don't even know.
I can't stop laughing.
Six years old, telling your parents,
I was negative to dream with these witches eating my ass.
They were so, they were just being so.
I would be mortified if my kid was telling them this.
My ears have just gone so red.
Why are you guys shaming me?
It's the most amazing story I've ever heard.
No, we are.
We are.
No, I'm not shaming.
I think it's so visually funny.
It's a horny movie.
It's so hot.
Because you're very earnestly being like,
Mom, Dad, I had this dream.
I was naked and someone just stole my soul
and they ate my ass.
And I was like, we have to go back to the cinema
so I can see it again in theaters.
And so I think they took me multiple times
and they would just wait in the lobby.
I'd go in by myself and watch it.
Cause Sarah Jessica Parker rides this broomstick.
She sings a sexy song and then Bette Midler, come on.
Powerful, funny, all three of them hilarious.
I'll have to watch this movie.
See, I don't know if we're gonna have the same reaction.
You're not, because you're adults,
and it's not a horny movie, really.
It's a children's movie.
But I love that your parents are like,
we really want you to have this dream again, too,
so let's go to the movies.
Yeah, I guess.
Wow, wow.
You've never seen Hocus Pocus?
There's gotta be people out there who've had this same fantasy as you.
Let's be clear.
This was not a fantasy.
There has to be.
What are you talking about?
This Hocus Pocus fantasy.
Of a meatloaf ass that gets sliced?
You never know.
It's such a hacky dream.
Whoever's listening right now who had this same Hocus Pocus dream, please respond on the handsome podcestals.
Right in.
I thought it was original.
Well, maybe it is.
We might come up empty, but I'd like to know.
I just, yeah, what about you guys anyways?
Same.
Same, yeah.
Pretty similar story to that one.
The first time I was like, whoa, what is this?
I had a sleepover with a friend who was newer to town
and we had gone to my brother's baseball game or something
and a bunch of us were rolling down the hill.
And I know.
And so later-
You're like, I'll catch ya.
Should we roll together?
And so later that night she's like,
did you see how so and know, so and so,
I don't remember what boy it was, you know,
Kyle was rolling down the hill trying to roll with me
and I was like, yeah, I saw that, it was crazy.
But like, how did it go?
How did it go?
She was like, he like got on top of me and like rolled.
I was like, oh really, like how?
And she got on top of me to do a roll.
And it was kind of my first sort of dry hump.
Oh my God.
And I was like, da-ya-ya-ya-ya-ya-ya-ya-ya-ya-ya-ya.
Oh my God.
And you probably didn't even really know.
I didn't know, yeah.
You were just like, I like that.
How old are you?
Like seven.
Yeah.
Yeah, and I was like, how did it go again?
And then we rolled around for a little bit.
Oh my God.
And then she's like, okay, that's enough.
Yeah.
I was like, yeah, yeah, yeah, I got it.
Yeah, I'm sick of this too.
Oh yeah, we're good now, right?
I think we both have a clear understanding
of what you and Kyle did.
Do you ever remember being a kid
and playing some game that's slightly horny with a friend
and then your parents or someone's like,
dinner, and you're like, oh god,
and you kind of know, you're like, oh anyway,
and then you're eating dinner, so embarrassed,
but you're like, we gotta get back to our game now. Yeah I didn't kiss a boy behind my tree house you did because I was watching all these movies
And that's how I said this is how they do in the movies. They kiss behind a tree house Yeah, and I was like discovered the dry humping yet. And then...
It wasn't great.
It doesn't look great.
He was like, what is happening?
I was like, this is what they do in the movies.
Clearly I had some pent up frustration.
I needed to watch Hocus Pocus.
That's when you knew you were gay?
Was when you were kissing behind the tree house?
I didn't enjoy it. I liked the rolling with the girl a lot better
than the kissing with the boy.
Yeah.
Rolling with the girl.
Rolling with the girl.
I didn't have any shame around the rolling with the girl.
That's good.
Because no one else was there.
Yeah.
And I don't really, I think,
it sounds weird now in a world where there's technology
and YouTube and shows where you're like,
there's so much more representation.
But back then it was so few and far between.
I really didn't understand what gay was
for a very long time, like longer than what seems normal now.
I feel lucky.
Yeah.
I mean, I knew what gay was-ish in high school,
but I didn't know any gay people.
There was not one out person in my hometown.
No out person in my high school.
Are there now out people?
Oh yeah, for sure, for sure.
The one person I assumed was probably gay,
because I knew what it was at that point,
was married in a heterosexual relationship.
So I had this connotation of like,
I'm pretty sure he's this, but he's in this,
so that thing over here must be bad.
Yeah, yeah.
And even in college, I really didn't know any gay,
or any gay people.
The best thing my parents did,
and I mean maybe I was too young for it,
but I'm really grateful anyway,
was they showed me the Rock Your Picture show
when I was like five,
because my grandfather was in it and stuff.
And seeing them celebrated and Frank and Ferter,
and they were like,
Frank and Ferter's the coolest character.
And I was like, oh, my parents are like,
and there's all this spectrum of people out there,
and this is the coolest movie ever,
and it just made me know that there were options,
and I didn't have to be ashamed of my parents.
Yeah, that's good.
Yeah, what about you?
Take early gay moments.
Early gay moments, I remember in sixth grade,
there was this friend that came over after school,
This friend that came over after school
and we were playing on a dirt pile.
In the south it always starts in the grass for the dirt. Oh my God.
What do you mean a dirt pile?
I don't know, there's just like, yeah, pile of dirt.
Nothing else to do.
So I'm picturing this in your house,
in your bedroom, a giant pile of dirt,
but no, you're outside, okay.
No, we were outside,
and I remember she tried to kiss me.
Whoa.
Yeah.
So she was picking up vibes.
Yeah, and I was stunned.
You're like, what a dirt pile, ma'am.
Yeah, what a dirt bag.
And were you like, yeah, how'd you respond?
I was just thrown off.
I, and I think because I didn't respond to it,
we just kind of acted like that didn't happen.
Yeah.
But I was like, what the hell just happened?
Right, yeah.
Why didn't my friend just try and kiss me?
Yeah, that is jarring.
Yeah, I didn't see it coming.
But also, I guess my, even though I guess she's not gay,
I think she's actually maybe conservative
or Christian or something, but what's her name from?
She felt like representation at the time, even though I didn't know I was gay.
Who?
From Facts of Life.
Oh yeah.
Jo. Jo.
Was her name.
Okay. Yeah.
I think a lot of lesbians of the era
were really into her.
Yeah. Yeah.
And like Christy McNichol.
Yep, I've heard a lot of that.
Yeah.
There's a few actresses who are straight I think
but are unanimously loved by like Mariska Hargitay
from Long Order S.F.
And Sarah Michelle Gellar, wasn't she a big,
or no, what?
Zena.
Zena.
People were obsessed with, lesbians were obsessed with Zena.
I worked for her.
There were queer overtures in that show.
I never watched that.
By the end of the series, they were like,
oh, they're in love.
You watched Zena? Of course. You worked for they were like, oh, they're in love. Of course.
You worked for Lucy Lawless?
Yeah, she's a friend.
What?
Yeah.
Wow.
I didn't know how much till this moment,
how much she means to me.
I didn't know, yeah.
Who's like you in the parade?
Witnesses in real time.
Why haven't we got,
She was at my wedding in Mississippi.
Can we get Lucy Lawless on the,
That's easy.
I'm a big fan.
Okay.
You didn't even know what all big of a fan you were.
We could go visit her in New Zealand.
We could go stay with her in New Zealand.
Oh my gosh, she was in New Zealand, of course.
I just love that I was like, lesbians were in the Zena.
You're like, yeah, she was pretty popular with community.
What?
There was something like-
You know her?
Yeah, I don't know.
Something happened there.
Yeah.
Like I knew the show exists and I knew,
and I watched it pretty religiously.
And then to suddenly know there was a potential
direct line to Lucy Lawless, I was electrified there.
Yeah, that was my job when I first moved to LA.
Like her assistant?
No, I worked at the production company.
Her husband is producing partners
with the director Sam Raimi.
Oh, no way, okay.
And so they produced, Sam and Rob produced
Xena and Hercules and all these shows.
Young Hercules, Ryan Gosling.
Ryan Gosling.
And Ryan, I'll have you know.
Don't be on a first name basis with Ryan.
No, listen, Ryan, no.
But he's a cutie patootie.
That would be a big bomb to drop
if you're best friends with him.
No, but listen to this insanity.
While I worked at this company,
Ryan was on Young Hercules,
the production company produced that show,
and he filmed that in New Zealand.
And one day I was going home to my studio apartment,
the first place I lived in Los Angeles.
And Ryan is pushing the code to go into the building.
And I said, hey, Ryan.
And he said, yeah.
And I said, hey, I'm Tig.
I work at Renaissance Pictures.
And he was like, oh, no way.
And I said, what are you doing here?
Because, you know, I would talk to
and deal with these actors.
This is like.
Who are in New Zealand, yeah.
Well, yeah, who are in New Zealand.
But I was in LA.
And I was like, yeah, I work at Renaissance Pictures.
And I said, what are you doing here?
And he said, oh, my mom lives here.
And when I'm home, I crash with my mom.
Oh, no way.
And it was just this old apartment building,
studio apartments.
Maybe there were some one bedrooms, I don't know.
But Ryan Gosling's mother lived in my building.
That's such a good LA story.
Yeah, yeah.
I gotta get him on too.
That might be a little harder for me.
I can get Lucy Lawless.
Please get Lucy Lawless.
Immediately I can get Lucy.
She's from New Zealand, right?
She did my Don't Ask Tig over there.
Really?
Yeah, she's from New Zealand.
Yeah, she's from Auckland.
No.
Do you remember a show called Nikita?
Nikita Fim. Yeah
Cherche La Femme Don La Nuit. I never watched it, but I it was big in Canada. They filmed it in Canada
It was this Australian woman called Peter Wilson. That's a niche early crush. There was a scene
I have a fetish because of one scene on that show, I think, that I thought it was because of a-
One of many fetishes.
One of many, one of many.
First there's old meatloaf ass with the witches.
Of course, of course.
Meatloaf ass.
Oh yeah.
And then there's, I think it was Nikita
where she's interrogating some guy, he's like,
and then so she, I think he's, she gives him water
and she's like telling him a secret,
because she's pretending she's a bad guy, but really she's good, and so she, I think he's, she gives him water and she's like telling him a secret because she's pretending she's a bad guy
but really she's good.
And so she's like, I'm pretending I'm being mean to you
but then she gives him water and pours it into his mouth.
And now I have this thing,
I want people to pour water into my mouth.
Wow, all right.
I want like a hand on the back of the head
and just give me water.
I don't know.
During sex ideally, like you pause, you need hydration.
You get your head tilted back.
I've told everyone I've ever dated this.
No one can do it without spilling it all over me,
laughing, no one can confidently.
They're like waterboarding you all of a sudden.
This is not sexy.
Parvati's tried.
She's tried many times.
And many times.
The water just goes everywhere.
She's working on it, it goes everywhere. Do you pour it into her mouth? She's not many times. And the water just goes everywhere. She's working on it.
It's just, it goes everywhere.
Do you pour it into her mouth or?
She's not into it.
She'd be like, what are you doing?
Yeah, okay.
She just passed me the bottle of water.
Was Buffy the Vampire Slayer big with the Lesseys?
Yes, yeah.
Because that had an openly queer, like Willow was gay.
I never watched that one either.
That was a big deal.
Yeah. And Dawson's Creek had the first gay kiss, I think. I never watched that one either. That was a big deal. Yeah.
And Dawson's Creek had the first gay kiss I think.
Oh, was that Bizzy Phillips character in Michelle Williams?
No.
No, it was this character Jack.
Oh, guys?
Guys.
Oh, gotcha.
That was the first gay kiss on TV?
I think so, on Dawson's Creek.
Really?
Yeah.
Gosh, that seems.
Can we check that?
Thomas.
We don't know about this Mayfect.
No, we really don't.
I'm trying to think if there was any TV shows
where I was like, ah-oo-ga.
Maura Tierney on ER.
Ah-oo-ga.
Ah-oo-ga.
On ER?
Yeah, she was a good one.
And on news radio, Maura Tierney.
Uh-huh.
Yeah.
Gosh, who was I into?
We know Tig's into Keri Russell because of a bus.
I know.
Her photo on a bus.
Yeah, but I already knew I was gay
when I saw her go by on a bus.
And this was like, what is her most recent, the Americans?
Yes, yeah, okay.
So you already had a wife and kids.
Like I said, I was with Stephanie.
We were driving down the road and I was like,
whoa, who is that?
She's like Carrie Russell.
That's really funny.
Yeah, I was too, I didn't have enough brush-ins
with ladies when I was young.
I would have liked more.
I was too afraid, I think, of just like
them thinking I was being what you are.
Yeah.
Yeah.
I really wanted to play the snare drum in the band.
I don't know if I've said this before,
but that was when I first started to be like,
I wasn't thinking of gay and straight,
but more like masculine, feminine kind of thing.
And I was like, I really want to play the snare drum.
But I was like, but that's kind of what, that's what boys do.
Oh my god, it starts so young.
And people will like, look at me like I'll be a weirdo.
Yeah.
So I, but I chose the trumpet instead.
Like what is...
Oh, I thought you were going to say you were going to play a hot flute.
No, but all the girly girls were playing the flutes and flutes in the clarinet. So I play the dorky trumpet
Trumpets pretty cool. Yeah
That was when I started sort of really thinking in terms of like masculine and feminine and what you're supposed to do
You're not supposed to be and what you're not supposed to be.
Oh, it sucks so much.
And just always feeling sort of out of place.
And everyone else seems to be born with this knowledge
of what lip gloss to buy and how to do it
and you're faking it a little.
I remember when I was younger
and when my friends started, I don't know,
clearly dressing up for guys and wearing makeup and stuff.
And I remember looking at them and thinking,
okay, they have tennis shoes on, I've got tennis shoes on.
They've got jeans on, I've got jeans on.
They have a t-shirt on, I've got a t-shirt on.
But we are so different.
Like I couldn't figure out what was going on.
Yeah, it was such a mystery, right?
Now, if you look at someone now, you're like, oh duh.
But like at that age, there really was like,
what is going on?
How are we so different?
What is so different about me?
Why do I not feel like I am like any of you?
But then I also felt that after coming out,
like in the lesbian community,
and everyone being like, you're one of us,
and like, A, being bi, and being like, I know I read,
and then also being like, I don't think,
I don't feel like a girl even, so like I don't,
and yeah, so feeling out of place,
even in the gay community, it took me to 35 to,
now I feel like I know my niche and I feel comfortable
and I don't feel like I'm walking around
with like a rock in my shoe.
That's like the feeling where you're like,
I think something's in my shoe, but I don't know.
Yeah.
Push on.
Just bravely push on, soldier on
and try to like adjust my gait in a way that, yeah.
I tried to be a girly girl one time in 10th grade.
Do you have pictures?
I don't think I took a picture,
but I went to the mall and I bought a girl pair of jeans,
and I bought one of those sleeveless button-up shirts,
and a hair, what do you call those that puts your hair back?
A clip.
A clip, yeah, a hair clip.
And I, and like sandals, and that was the big,
you know, I'm from a small southern town,
so the Friday night football games,
the big event in the fall.
And so I got all dolled up in my button up sleeveless shirt
and put my hair, I slicked my hair back so no curls.
I slicked it back.
That's what the boys wanna see.
This is what the boys wanna see.
They wanna slick back hair deal with a clip.
I clipped that thing and I touched my wiener and put your earrings in and I put on the lip gloss
and I went to the football game and I just,
no one talked to me, no one really talked to me.
And I was like, well, this didn't work.
And that was that.
Oh my God.
And then how'd you end up getting a wiener in your hands?
Oh that was just, you know,
not even putting a thought or care in here.
Yeah, that was just like.
It just flew into your hands?
Hanging out.
And suddenly the wiener was in my hand.
I feel like the girls in my girls' school,
like before puberty and stuff,
like they thought of me as a boy even before I did, because when they all started wearing makeup, and it's a girls' school, and thenberty and stuff, they thought of me as a boy, even before I did,
because when they all started wearing makeup,
and it's a girl's school, and then so I put on makeup,
and they're all like, oh my God, May's wearing makeup?
And I'm like, yeah.
I'm like, no, no I'm not, and then they were,
but you know what I mean?
I was like, I can't win here.
I remember when I went to a new school
when I was in fourth grade,
and we lived in New Jersey for a couple of years.
And in fourth grade, went to the new school,
and there was this girl named Jean,
and everybody was telling me that Jean had a crush on me.
Whoa.
And I was like, she thought I was a boy.
Oh my God.
Yeah.
Yeah, and I had to come out.
As a girl.
Yeah.
Isn't that crazy?
Like she felt the crush.
Yeah.
Yeah, yeah.
And then when she found out, she's like,
oh, nevermind.
Yeah, later on.
Just shut that feeling away.
Yeah.
Oh, later, later.
I must have been mistaken by that feeling.
Should we hear what the Muna trio has to say?
Yes.
Hi, handsome.
It's Muna.
We didn't realize that we had to also answer this question,
or else, frankly, we wouldn't have asked it.
But I don't know.
I can't.
Will you talk first so I can remember mine?
That's awesome that I get to talk first,
because I knew what I was going say and it was this. The first time, the
gay shame, I didn't feel shame until like I was a bit older but the
first time I was kind of like uh-oh was like I had a crush on my kindergarten
teacher and I was like why am I mad that she has a boyfriend? And then I was like
oh no that might be kind of weird.
And then I kind of just forgot about it for like several years.
But then the shame came in much, much later.
Sorry, I'm chewing on a mint.
This is like, you're good.
You're okay.
You did good.
Yeah.
I'm fine.
Um, the first time I used to think a lot about statistics. You look cool.
I used to think a lot about statistics, about how statistically someone in my class is going
to be gay.
Little did I know, statistically the chance was me.
Because I was just ashamed that, you know, I look so awesome.
But who was your first gay crush?
Like you saw in the movies or something?
I mean, I was madly in love with Kirsten Dunn. So I always say this who wasn't who wasn't yeah
Who wasn't all right go Katie? Um, I've talked I've told the story before on the podcast
But I feel like mine was specifically like with shame. I don't want to say this
Um, I was watching a movie called get over it
there's a scene where a girl's dress gets pulled down and I figured out how to
Make my VCR run in slow motion so I could see
The boobies
I
was alone in my house and I
felt
sexual and and I was afraid.
This question's awesome.
Yeah, I'm glad we're gay and I was afraid.
So now that we've been so vulnerable, I expect this to be a very vulnerable episode.
The whole episode.
Mm hmm.
Yeah.
Goodbye.
Goodbye.
Goodbye. Those are great. Yeah. I think this has been a vulnerable episode in a way. Goodbye. Goodbye. Goodbye. Goodbye.
Those are great.
I think this has been a vulnerable episode in a way.
Yeah.
What'd you say?
We always go through vulnerable times.
We always get back to that hot flute
that fortune got ahold of.
We share.
Yeah.
Sharing is caring.
We share and share alike.
We share.
I really like the statistics thing.
Oh my god, it is so funny.
Of sitting there being like,
well, one of us must be.
One out of 20.
Wait a second.
It's me.
It's me.
Yeah, there's still a ton of out people in my gay area,
my gay area, my hometown.
Do they have a parade?
Nope, they have a parade, but it's not a gay parade.
They have a Christmas parade.
But there are more gays there than when I was coming out.
We'll wheel our boob down there.
We'll wheel our paper mache.
Can we wheel a Christmas parade with our boob?
With our gay boob?
Yes, our vaseline.
Thank you so much for listening to the handsome pod.
Yeah, we hope this was a good kickoff to Pride Month.
Yeah.
I think it was.
I think it was a really good kickoff to Pride Month.
If you're listening in a small town,
get out to the parade.
Seriously, good place to meet people.
I don't know if this will be announced yet,
and if it's not announced yet, Thomas will cut it.
But Jackson-
Fortune's pregnant.
Jackson and I have been asked to be grand marshals.
No way.
Of the Chicago Pride Parade.
Oh my God.
That's a big honor.
And so we're pretty pumped because we met
at Chicago Gay Pride.
Oh wow.
Nine years ago.
How did you leave that till the end of the pod?
I know, I just now thought about it.
You met at Pride, wow.
We met at Pride nine years ago, Chicago Pride. And so they reached out, they said we heard, you know, I just now thought about it. You met at Pride, wow. We met at Pride nine years ago, Chicago Pride,
and so they reached out, they said we heard y'all's story
about your story, and we'd love for you both
to be grand marshals.
That's really nice.
And I was, I'll be filming, but I was like,
you know what, I gotta do this.
Yeah.
And it'll land on our anniversary.
That is awesome.
So we're excited, I've never been a grand marshal of the old gay pride parade.
What was that in tail?
I think you sit on it in the car like a princess.
Yes.
Like a gay princess.
Oh my God.
And I'm gonna work on my wave.
I am gonna see if they'll give me one of those
like karaoke speaker machines.
See? Not to sing.
Like no Ferris Bueller,
but I wanna be able to be like, what's up everybody?
You've listened to Handsome?
You know like that.
You know?
Speaking of Ferris Bueller, that's a, like him doing
that dance in the pro, I was like, I want to be that guy.
Yeah.
How could?
Now, I've been asked to be a grand marshal.
Oh yeah?
Yes, but it was for the Mardi Gras parade in my hometown.
I'm not.
You didn't do it though?
I haven't done it.
You gotta do it.
But your family.
And your family.
My family?
Your family's gotta be on the parade with you.
My family, they've all been grand marshals and all that.
No, yeah, okay.
Well you gotta do it in the hometown.
We'll see.
I mean it's no Chicago, you know.
This is just small town.
That's all right.
Gumbo Parade.
And I think next Summer Pride,
the handsoms need a float.
Yes, yeah.
I would be so up for that.
Where, where?
Anywhere?
Whoever reaches out.
Tokyo Pride.
It's gonna be a bidding war.
Oh, Tokyo Pride. I would love to go to Tokyo. It's gonna be a bidding war. Oh, Tokyo Pride, I would love to go to Tokyo.
It's gonna be a bidding war.
There's no money.
Have you been?
Never.
Yeah, there's a bidding war for us,
but there's no money involved.
But there will be a bidding war of who's praying.
That's a good idea.
And do we bring our people that we're highly involved?
Yeah, why not?
And Thomas can be front and center.
Yeah, oh yeah.
Thomas can throw out bees.
Oh my god.
Oh my god, I would love that.
Make him, you can either wear a propeller hat
or your little cowboy hat.
Yes.
Yeah.
You can wear your mustache.
What mustache?
Oh.
Oh.
And I'll wear something.
Oh, you should wear
the muscle teeth.
your little lady outfit that you went
and bought yourself at the mall.
Oh my God, yes.
I can't. Yeah, yes. I can't.
Yeah, oh I couldn't possibly.
Couldn't possibly.
Oh, I don't wanna turn on the minnow,
you know, that are gonna be seeing that.
Yeah!
People are driving off the road.
Well is that a cliff in that hair?
Well I'll be practicing my wave all month.
You can get, you can, speaking of what to wear to Pride,
you can check out handsomepod.com
and there's some cool merch on there that you got.
For real though.
Little cowboy hats, you got a handsome muscle tees.
Send, and teachers, send us pictures of you.
Oh that's what I was gonna say.
Yes, at Pride Parades.
At the parades.
Rocking the handsome merch.
Or anywhere.
Yeah. Or anywhere, yeah.
Post it, tag us, we'll repost some,
and I'd love to see that.
And when I'm in the car on that parade,
I'd love to see some handsome.
Yeah, get out there on the streets.
Get out there in the streets and rock that handsome merc.
That's right.
What do you guys got coming up?
Anything to applaud?
I just have my regular working out news shows
or new material in Los Angeles at Largo
and Dynasty Typewriter.
And check out my special on Prime Video
called Hello Again.
Yeah, that's kinda it.
I got four casino shows, New Buffalo, Michigan,
in a couple weeks.
I got Atlantic City, New Jersey, Niagara Falls, New York,
and Charlestown, West Virginia.
Niagara Falls is so fun.
Yeah.
Which, you're on the American side?
The American side, yeah.
Okay, yeah, yeah, yeah, I'll wave at you from.
All right.
Yeah, yeah, I'm yeah. I'll wave at you from. All right. Yeah, yeah.
I'm just bumming around Toronto and yeah,
so I don't think I'm just getting ready to do this show,
this TV show, so I don't think I'm doing any shows
at the moment, but you know, stay tuned on Instagram
and like and share the pod if you're enjoying it.
Tell your friends.
We wanna keep growing it.
We want it to get bigger and bigger and bigger.
Yeah, that is, you know, people are always like, wait, friends. We wanna keep growing it. We want it to get bigger and bigger and bigger.
People are always like, don't ever stop doing the show.
The way to keep the show going is to click subscribe
for the audio podcast, head on over to YouTube,
click subscribe.
Tell your pals.
Tell your pals, share episodes, share videos.
Tell Lucy Lawless though, Tig. Tell Lucy Lawless share episodes. Yeah. Share videos. Tell Lucy Lawless though, Tig.
Tell Lucy Lawless.
Oh.
That's on you.
Oh, I'm gonna reach out to Lucy immediately.
Yes.
Lucy.
All that remains in that case is to remind everyone to
Keep it Handsome.
What a podcast.
Handsome is hosted by me, Fortune Feimster,
Tig Notaro, and Mae Martin.
The show is produced, recorded, and edited by Thomas Woulett.
Email us at handsomepod at gml.com
and follow us on social media at handsomepod.
What a podcast!
What a podcast!
What a podcast!
What a podcast!
What a podcast!
What a podcast!
What a podcast!
What a podcast!
What a podcast!
What a podcast!
What a podcast!
What a podcast!
What a podcast!
What a podcast!