Handsome - Pretty Little Episode #28

Episode Date: February 28, 2025

Fortune and Tig chat about hot dog costumes and memorable side hustles on today's Pretty Little Episode!Handsome is streaming LIVE from Austin April 12! Get your tickets here.Handsome is hosted by Tig Notaro, Mae Martin, and Fortune FeimsterSubmit questions to speakpipe.com/handsomepodFollow us on social media @handsomepodMerch at handsomepod.comWatch Handsome on YouTubeThis is a Headgum podcast. Follow Headgum on Twitter, Instagram, and Tiktok. Advertise on Handsome via Gumball.fm.See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

This is a HeadGum Podcast. This is a HeadGum Podcast. Some people just know they could save hundreds on car insurance by checking Allstate First. Like you know to check that you're all stocked up on sprinkles before making cupcakes. They might not taste like anything, but they really complete the look of the cupcake. Checking First is smart, so check Allstate first for a quote that could save you hundreds. You're in good hands with Allstate.

Savings vary subject to terms, conditions, and availability. Allstate firing casualty insurance company and affiliates, Northbrook, Illinois. Handsome pot. Chatting with friends on the handsome pot. Chatting with friends on the handsome pot, chatting with friends on the handsome pot. Pretty Little Episode. It surprised me again.

Welcome to our Pretty Little Episode. I'm your host for today, Fortune Feimster. I'm also your host for today, Tig Notaro. And we're also your hoes for the day, what? Fortune? Marie, did you just call us hoes? Yeah, for the day, what? Fortune? Marie, did you just call us hoes? Yeah, for the day. Oh my gosh, that is, that is really dirty.

Okay? That is some dirty talk. That's right. It's not gonna be happening when I'm involved, okay? You like that, you like it when I talk like that. Fortune, Marie, when I'm involved. Okay. Like that you like it when I talk like that. Fortune Marie. No, I don't. I would like to keep our relationship friendly and professional. I apologize my friend, but you do look very beautiful today. Thank you. I have on my flannel. This is my lesbian outfit. I love a flannel. Thomas has one on too. I don't know who to choose.

So what is going on? You know, life. Still the aftermath of the fires going on. I don't know if I told you we have some people moving into our office. Yeah. And we got a text again today seeing if there is more room or space anywhere. Yeah, a lot going on. Are you somebody that would be like, I'm done with all of the risks here in LA, I'm getting out. Or are you like, I'm staying? This is my place. I'm staying. It's my place.

But I don't, I mean, I don't know how I would feel if I lived in that community and your entire community's gone. I would be probably hesitant to rebuild being in that area that is prone to fire. You hope that that's an outlier, that it's something that wouldn't happen again, but Malibu is adjacent to palisades and it's always being evacuated. So that would be tough to start over there. But people will. People certainly will because they love it so much. It's near the ocean. It's gorgeous. And they really have a beautiful community there.

Yeah, I get texts every now and then from Stephanie of like the migration from LA to New York and all of that. Really? Like upstate New York? I think everywhere. Connecticut, New Jersey, New York, New York City, upstate New York? I think everywhere, Connecticut, New Jersey, New York, New York City, upstate New York, but all that really started in the pandemic as well. Yeah. Wanting a little more space and whatever.

Yeah, we have moments where we're like, eh, maybe we'll head out. And then- Really? Yeah, we have those moments, but also we have our kids who are so happy in their school. They love our house. They love their baseball and basketball leagues. So we need to always be considering many different people.

Yeah. But I'm flexible. Like if Stephanie was like, let's go, I'd be like, all right, let's go. Really? Yeah. Yeah. I've never lived in the Northeast. I am not a cold weather gal.

Yeah. So that would be my hesitation there. You like to show off your gams. I know. I like to be in my miniskirts and letting these legs fly in the sunshine. I've lived in LA for 21 years, so it's just so what I'm used to now. Yeah, same. I had no interest in moving to LA, and then my childhood friends moved there and then I, because we grew up together and moved everywhere, you know, they all went to college and I just followed them around smoking.

And then, and then they moved to LA and I came with them and I just thought I'll be here for six months and then I'll leave. Yeah. But then I started doing stand up and I got bolted to the ground and ended up loving it. And then I think when we had kids was when I started to see the city a little differently and started to think, oh, you know, it'd be nice if they had more space to play and could just get on their bikes and that whole thing. But then they started to have opinions of their own and were like, we like it here. And Stephanie's whole family, they're all in California and, you know. That's nice.

Yeah. But yeah, I was just curious if you were having your response. I'm here for now. I don't know. We've mentioned other places like during that time in the pandemic when everybody else did of like, what about this place or this place? And then we'd visit that place for a few days and then we, no. Yeah. So, I don't know. It's also easy to think, oh, I'll just leave.

And then you think, are the restaurants going to be as good? Is the social life going to be as good? The entertainment, you know, your social network, all of that. Yeah. There is something magical about LA that, I mean, the all of that. Yeah. There is something magical about LA that, I mean, the city's changed a lot since the pandemic, so there are definitely cons. But there are a lot of pros, too.

And the magical part of LA is how many times I've pinched myself in a situation where I was like, I can't believe I'm at this table with this person. You just have these moments that are surreal out here because it's connected to the industry or people you've admired or, you know, so you end up having these kind of magical nights here and there that you just like, if I told my 15 year old self that I'd be in this place doing this thing with these people I would never believe it. You'd think you were a liar.

And now you've become somebody that people would be like, I was at dinner with Fortune Feimster last night. Look at that. Yeah. Look at that. So, coming full circle. And she asked if I was going to finish my steak or my baked potato. And she didn't wait for an answer.

And she just started eating it. She just swiped the things. Should we get to some questions? I think we should. That's what we're here to do. Yeah, it is. This question comes from Tori. Hey, handsome. Super love you guys. I am sitting here with my sweet little fur baby Roxanne and we have a question for you. I often listen to you guys when I'm doing my side gig. So my question is, what is the craziest, silliest, most fun thing that you ever did before you were so handsomely successful to make money?

Can't wait to hear your answers. I think this was pretty fun. For my first seven years in Los Angeles, I was an entertainment journalist. It started in 2003. I had a job and the person I was working for, her neighbor, she's like, I heard you can write. Would you be interested in going to movie premieres or parties around town and just writing up a blurb for me. She wrote for the LA Daily News.

And I was like, that sounds- You're like little old me. Yeah, I was like, that sounds cool. I was like 23 years old, just moved to LA. And I was like, I get to go to movie premieres? That's cool. So I just kind of learned, I went with her to two events,

kind of saw how she did it, and just kind of like taught myself how to be a journalist. Wow. And did that for a while. I think I helped her for like a year. And then these other right, this other column was looking for part-time help and she gave them my information and I started working for them part-time

So that that part-time job ended up leading to a full-time job for them so for For that whole time I started going to all these events and award shows and I interviewed people on the phone and Got to interview like really amazing performers and directors and writers and went to sets and went to the Oscars and the Grammys and the Emmys and was in the press room. And it was, if I wanted to be a journalist, that would have been like, oh, I've made it. I just knew it wasn't what I wanted full time. I was pursuing comedy at night, but the people I wrote for were really supportive and knew I had this dream. My job was what

paid my bills and it was really rewarding, but then they also were very supportive of me pursuing comedy, so it was pretty perfect. And then that went until 2010. And then the newspapers, we wrote for like 100 newspapers and online and the newspapers started folding. So they had the, they didn't have the money to pay me anymore. So it kind of came to an end just because of that. And that's kind of what gave me the, like, leaving the nest to pursue comedy full-time. And so you were starting to feel like, oh, I want to try standup. Yeah, I started Groundlings in 2005 first and then stand up in 2007. in 2007 and in 2010 was when I stopped being a journalist and I did Last Comic Standing and then 2011 is when I got Chelsea Lately.

Okay. So it was a great job. I have so many cool experiences that I got to do and talk to like my first person I ever interviewed on the phone was Betty White. I got to talk to so many amazing people. And so as a journalist, was that a decent living? Yeah, I mean, it didn't pay for someone who didn't grow up with money. I made basically kind of what a teacher makes.

So it wasn't like extravagant, but I could pay my bills. That's cool. Yeah. Some people just know they could save hundreds on car insurance by checking all estate first. Like you know, to check that the thousand piece puzzle you're eyeing at your neighbor's garage sale actually has all thousand pieces before you buy it. Time to get counting. Checking first is smart.

So check Allstate first for a quote that could save you hundreds. You're in good hands with Allstate. Savings vary. Subject to terms, conditions, and availability. Allstate firing casualty insurance company and affiliates, Northbrook, Illinois. Yeah, I love music and I play guitar and drums, but very, very basic. Musician. Um, and I didn't feel comfortable on stage doing that.

I tried a few times, but I was like, Oh God, like like I just it's so weird that I can do stand up but when I played guitar on stage I was so nervous and uncomfortable like my hands would be trembling but I wanted to be around the world of music and so my girlfriend at the time had a band and I started managing and booking her band. Oh, cool. And yeah, so, and that led to me meeting people at record labels and I would be hired as like an independent promoter for different bands that were coming through different cities. And yeah, the music world, that was, it was, it was fun. And I started working with a couple other bands as well and booking them.

And I think actually working in that world made me, it really helped me with my career as a comedian because I realized that, you know, so many people when they start out, they're like, why am I not getting that job? Or I want this, or I want that manager, agent or whatever. And what I realized through working with bands was you have to do so much of your own work to get yourself to a certain point to make yourself appealing to people and places that wanna work with you. So I just put my head down for the longest time.

I didn't like worry about reps or managers, agents, anything like that. I was just like, I need to get good at standup. And then once I have something to present to somebody, then, then I'll go for it. Yeah. But, but it was really fun at the time to hop in the tour van with, uh, my girlfriend or my, the other bands that I was friends with too, and just go on tour and, and, uh, act like a hard nose manager. Were you good at act like a hard-nosed manager.

Were you good at acting like a hard-nosed manager? I feel like I was good at the job. I mean, I wasn't really a hard-nosed, but I was like, I mean, I probably came across as hard-nosed because when I was much younger, I was so surrounded by my shell of protection that I probably seemed, I was probably a little off putting or hard to approach. So that kind of folded into, yeah, I'm a hard nose manager, but not really if you talk to me. I'm just scared and wounded. That's why my face looks angry. But yeah, so that worked to my advantage.

Oh, that's cool. Yeah. It's like we had these other lifetimes. Yeah, and it's also funny because, you know, having that job, it made me realize that people in those jobs can just wake up one day and be like, I'm a manager. I'm an agent.

We talk about that all the time, that there's so many jobs, especially in LA, that people just decide they're that thing. And it requires no education or skill or experience. Experience. You're truly- Yeah, I'm this now. Yeah, I'm a manager. and it requires no education or skill or experience. You're truly, yeah. I'm this now. Yeah, I'm a manager. And it works for a lot of people.

But having had that job, it really made me realize like I know what's behind the curtain. Yeah. And I woke up one day and said, I'm a manager. the curtain. And I woke up one day and said, I'm a manager. But yeah, there's really great managers that woke up one day and said, I'm a manager. And then there are others that are not. You figured it out. Yeah. But yeah, I mean, it's the same with a. Like I woke up one day and said, I'm a comedian. Yeah.

So many jobs in this industry don't need anything except, you know, you work on stuff for a little while, get your bearings and you're off to the races. And I think that's probably why it appeals to somebody like myself with a seventh grade education. Okay, should we hear Tori's answer? Yeah. So my answer is many years ago, as a young, young lady, I used to have to dress up as a hot dog and host children's birthday parties.

It was not my finest moment. I definitely needed money. But you know what? $100 a party is $100 a party. Even dressed as a hot dog. Super love you guys. Thank you for the uplifting content every week. Have the most wonderful 2025.

You too, Tori. Yeah, Tori in the bun. I don't think I ever got invited to a birthday party where someone was dressed as a hot dog. Really? That's the only ones I go to, Fortune. I'm gonna get you a hot dog for your next birthday party. Maybe we could reach out to Tori.

I wonder if she still fits into her hot dog costume. All right, let's see. What else do we have, Mr. Thomas? Hi, handsoms. My name is Cathy and I am calling you from Newfoundland, Canada. And my question is, do you have a specific phrase or word that you realized as an adult you have been saying wrong your whole life? I'll give you an example. My husband did not find out until he was about 28 years old that a grapefruit is not a great fruit. He thought it was a G-R-E-A-T fruit because it was bigger than the other fruit. A grapefruit is a fear.

I love how she uses an example of her husband. Oh, I guess we're going to find out later what hers is. Oh, okay. I thought she was like, this guy, huh. I mean, right away, it reminded me of when I was a kid, I thought, you know, dress code. You have to wear a certain dress or there's a certain dress code. I thought it was dress coat. Oh yeah. Adhere to the dress coat. Yeah, adhere to the dress coat. There's like phrases that sometimes I get, like people say I could care less or I couldn't care less.

It's I couldn't care less, right? Yeah, because you're at the bottom. There's no room to care more. But a lot of times people will say, I could care less. Or no, there's room to care more. There's absolutely no room to care less. Yeah, that one's always confusing for me.

Well, I just picture it in like a tub of caring. You're at the very bottom and underneath that, there's no, no, yeah. There's no room. There's also phrases where I'm like, what the hell does that mean? I say it correctly, but I'm like, what is by and large? You know, like by and large in an, in and of itself.

Yes. It's that kind of thing. By and large, you're the best comedian. Doesn't make sense. No. I, whenever somebody says that I'm like, by and large really doesn't make sense. No. Whenever somebody says that, I'm like, by and large. By and large.

By and large. My mom's been on me. I don't say this one because my mom is a grammar police, and she's drilled this into my head forever. But irregardless is not a word. So if you say irregardless, stop. There's a comedian a long time ago, Freddie Soto. He passed away. He was a comedy store comedian, and he had a whole bit on irregardless. Really?

Yeah. He was famous for his Irregardless bit. Funny, I'll have to look it up. Well, an ex of mine used to always say Chester drawers rather than chest of drawers. She'd be like, put that in my Chester drawers. That's funny. That is not what that's called. I really don't know if I have,

I'm sure there's words that I've not used correctly or mispronounced, but. Oh, I know. I know. I know mine. I was doing my very first podcast, which was very many years ago, and I was just casually chatting and I said, oh, careful, you don't want to tump that over. And my co-hosts were like, I'm sorry, what did you say? And I was like, oh, you just want to make sure you don't tump that over.

And they're like, tump? Like, that's not a word. What are you talking about? And I was like, yeah, it is. But I don't know if it's the same from where you come from, but it's Southern dialect. Mm-hmm. that's same from where you come from, but it's Southern dialect. To, to tump is to knock something over. And I didn't find out until I was probably late thirties that tump was

not a word. It's not a word. What about you? Did you grow up saying tump? Never heard Tom. Wow. Yeah. Yeah. Because normally I do know some of those random southern phrases.

Well, I also say, I wasn't going to do it. Or it doesn't matter. I say it doesn't matter. Yeah, I wasn't going to do it. Another person I dated used to say, I feel like I'm dating George Bush Jr. I was like, uh-uh, wasn't gonna do it. Wasn't gonna do it. That's funny.

Wasn't gonna do it. Wasn't gonna do it. Gonna tump that over. All right, let's hear Kathy's answer. Yeah. I thought that when you hauled off and punched somebody really hard, it was called a soccer punch, like a soccer ball was hitting them. I did not know it was called a soccer punch until I was way too old to learn new information.

So that's my answer. I love the podcast. Love all of you. Cheers. We love you too, Kathy and Tori. What great listeners we have. We sure do. Yes, we do. They really get us thinking. Yes. I wasn't going to do it at first, but anyway, submit your questions. We almost got clumped by these questions.

Yep. Yep. These questions really dumped us right over. Submit your questions at speakpipe.com slash handsome pod. That is speakpipe.com slash handsome pod and really get into your handsome brains and pull out some interesting, weird, obscure kind of questions. Hit us with your best shot. That's right. And always check out my website if you want to see what I'm up to or where I'm

out and about, out and about. Mm hmm. Out and about Newfoundland. That's right. Do you have anything to say before we wrap this up? Just appreciate everybody that's, uh, gives us questions. It's fun to hear from you guys. And, um, yeah, I'm on the road too.

Go to my website, come see your show. Buy some merch at thehansompod.com. Yeah. And until then, keep it pretty handsome. Handsome is hosted by me, Fortune Feimster, Tignitaro and Mae Martin. The show is produced, recorded and edited by Thomas Woulett. Email us at handsomepod at gmail.com and follow us on social media at handsomepod. Some people just know they could save hundreds on car insurance by checking Allstate First. Like you know to check that you've got a sleeve full of quarters before heading to

the arcade for an afternoon of pinball and air hockey. Checking First is smart, so check Allstate First for a quote that could save you hundreds. You're in good hands with Allstate. Savings vary, subject to terms, conditions, and availability. Allstate firing casualty insurance company and affiliates, Northbrook, Illinois.