Hate Watch with Devan Costa - At Least 10k

Episode Date: March 24, 2025

Ashton Hall influencer videos, woman gets caught masturbating inside movie theater, pedophile tries to evade justice with virtue, Evelyn check up https://www.patreon.com/c/HateWatchPodcast

🎵 You motherfuckers, you motherfuckers. Jesus man. I have diarrhea just ripping through my body right now. You're not listening to me about the psyllium. The area of the mouth. You guys all got a start take and fucking fiber powder. Look dude. It's unbelievable.

It's completely changed my life. I don't, my shits, they're five seconds long. I don't even wipe. I just don't wanna do it because you keep talking about it. Yeah, I see I'm at a point too where I'm like, please shut the fuck up. I got your pills and supplements.

It'll fully change your fucking life. It's not a pill, by the way. It's a little powder and you put it in water and it's good for cholesterol as well. Okay. Oh, that cholesterol. It's a little DM to me. Because all your boyfriends cum.

Yeah. In your body. Yeah, well of course, I need to get rid of that too. I shit it out quicker. It's like charcoal for your boyfriends Yeah. In your body. Well of course, I need to get rid of that too. I shit it out quicker. It's like charcoal for your boyfriend's cum. What if a chihuahua was driving a telly ride? That's all for you. Dude, what if a chihuahua took psyllium husks?

What if a chihuahua did that? Dude, that'd be crazy. You'd probably have better shits. Somebody DM'd me and goes like, hey, you should try this psyllium husk stuff. You'll never have a diarrhea ever again. And I said, okay, thanks for the warning. I'll avoid it.

I'll avoid it at all okay, thanks for the warning All cost thanks for the warning That was your week Joseph. You fucking had a wild start you went on a fucking Tuesday You were playing in a back alley poker game all night with the hookers all sorts of shit my buddy Raymond stacks So I used to play poker with all the time back before like or like kind of like right when the pandemic started. He always tries to get me to go to poker games. So he was always inviting me to like the hustler and commerce and stuff to play poker. And I just always, I'm like, no, I don't think so.

And then he's been telling me, there's this game in the arts district where you live or so very close. I can't say exactly where because it's, of course, it's an underground illegal game. But so on Tuesday, he hit me up and goes like, hey, you know that game I've been telling you about? Well, here, I finally got like the address

and the invite for you and stuff. So I was like, all right, I kind of have to go. And turns out he couldn't even go because he's doing Jiu Jitsu or something at the exact same time. So you were in the morning? No, no, the game started at eight. Okay, what time did you get there?

Like 8.30. Oh my God. Really? Yeah time did you get there? Like eight thirty. Oh, my God. Really? Yeah. Do you feel like a loser? Were you like, I'm just here for the for the illegal poker game? So here I actually didn't. It was just like kind of awkward. So I got there. I'm walking down this like alley in sort of an area with no open businesses.

And it's just a dark alley. And there's a black dude sitting on the curb smoking a cig and I'm like, oh, it's a guy who's going to rob me because he knows there's a poker game here and he knows people walking up have a bunch of cash from them probably. So here we go.

And then like I walked by and I realized like, oh, I passed the place on the map where it is. So I turned back around, black dude stands up and he's like, oh, you're here for the poker game, and I'm like yeah I am so he was like a guard or like he was like kind of like out there meant to escort people in that are lost So then he walks me through a metal gates I get inside. There's another Black guard, but he's decked out in like full like rainbow six body armor and he has a gun and he's standing with a white guy that

has a pit bull and they're like hey who you here for and I say the guy's name who I invited me and he goes all right come down so I enter this like warehouse that they rented go down a long flight of stairs and inside it looks like the headquarters from the Nazis breaking bad. Yeah. Yeah. So there's a pool table. There's a bar. There is a like a legit poker table and stuff. And the game hasn't started yet because they did a decoy time like Connors comedy shows where they kind of just like let people pour in. So I walk in and there's just like waitresses that are clearly hookers and a bunch of dudes that are semi sketchy looking Gavin Newsom's playing like Russian Roulette

but so I come in and I'm just like I find the guy that invited me or the guy who runs the game that my buddy Ray connected me with. And I was just like, okay, blah, blah, blah. I Venmoed him money for the chips and stuff because I didn't have cash. What was the buy-in? So you could buy him for whatever you wanted. I bought him for 300 bucks. Nice. And then there were dudes sitting down, everybody eventually came, we started playing. Dudes probably were like at the most with like five thousand bucks And we started playing it was just quite awkward

It was sort of just like if you are man with any degenerate tendencies whatsoever It was kind of like this is heaven for you Yeah, because you're sitting down playing poker the waitresses are bringing you free Drinks as much as you want they come back constantly and they also will massage you. And the guy that ran the game kept being like, by the way, dude, they'll give you a massage if you want. And I'm like, I can't. I can't.

There's guys holding their car, just getting jacked. Yeah. No, there was, there were. He's like, hey, they'll massage you by the way. Joe's like, no further questions. He gets naked. He lays on the table. But yeah, so there was dudes just sitting there while playing poker, there was a lady standing behind them

massaging them, and then occasionally one of them would stand up and there was like a little back room that you could like with a door that you could close and they'd disappear into there and then walk out like whatever 45 minutes. So they were getting sucked off in between. Yeah, they were getting sucked off almost definitely. Maybe they're doing dinner at the Y, I don't know.

I think that's actually. Might have been a deity situation. Might have been deity. Or they paid extra for Greek. Could have been a meditation center. Who knows, it could have also been an MSOG situation. What's MSOG? I don't know, I forget what it means,

but I remember seeing it back in the old days. I don't even, I have no. MSOG, you know what I'm talking about, but I remember seeing it back in the old days. I don't know I'm sage You know I'm talking about Johnny. What is ms og mean multiple shots on goal? Wait multiple shots on what a little pops come more than once come more than once in the time allotted to you Yeah, more than one pop more than one pop cuz yeah There are chicks where you could pay for a full hour, as soon as you pop, sass is over. You're right out. BAM! You're out of there. BAM! I remember the old days, I think I've said this before but like some of the ads were it would be like a it would be like a

be like sassy classy queen. Sassy classy. And you're like who is paying for sass? Who are these guys? Walking in like oh can I have sex with you? I put 200 on the table and they're like, who is paying for sass? Who are these guys? Walking in like, oh, can I have sex with you? I put 200 on the table and they're like, uh-uh. That was your little ass dick. No, it's your little dick. You picked the queen of sass and class, sugar. And I'm sorry, that's a black prostitute.

You people are all the fucking same. God damn it, why did I get the sassy one? But not, so there was a mix of characters There were like some kids that they were college kids like a white college squares that were just like Poker guys that were just like they you know met these guys at a casino and they got invited And at one point like a 600 pound Mexican deed sits down right next to me And he has the really long coke you said hundred pounds Yeah, holy shit shine, then he said that right next to me and he has the really long coke you said 600 pounds yeah holy shit shine then he said that right next to me and I'm just like playing like I'm all scooted over he looks like Kingpin yeah and he has the coke fingernail he was just like obviously

there was a few guys that were like these guys are probably in gangs yeah yeah wow what a night for you and you were there till like 6 a.m. Yeah, so I kept playing. You won big money too, right? Yeah, I ended up profiting $1,300. Good for you. And yeah, at some point I just got into this mode where I couldn't lose. And I was also like, I don't know what was going on, but everybody was scared to play with me. You were hammered too, right?

Yeah, they kept, because it was the dude's birthday that ran the game. So they kept bringing like a tray with shots on them. And I'm like, I'm not going to be the pussy that doesn't take it. And I think they were trying to get me drunk to be back in worse. I usually don't drink. But tonight,

Let's switch it up tonight. Tonight, you know what? I'm a little uncomfortable. Let's get crazy. I'm a little weird. I feel a little weird with these surroundings. I'm going to have a few to take the edge off. But what they didn't realize is that it was like when you try to nuke Godzilla.

I just kept getting stronger and better and more confident in my moves and stuff. And then people started leaving and there was just some, a guy just got back, one of the regulars just got back from Thailand and everybody kept just implying that he was there to be a pedophile and stuff. Yeah. There to be a pedophile. There to be a pedophile. He's not always a pedophile,

but he's here tonight to be a pedophile. And then, so people kept pouring out and I was like, I wanted to have really good manners because it's a game right down The street for me. I wanted to get invited back. Yeah, that's where I'm playing I'm playing every hand that I'm giving everybody action. I'm like betting I'm like calling you prove you got like an invitation that you're not a cop or whatever Yes

so I also that was other things they all thought that I was a cop and the only reason that I still got invited is because Ray showed them that we're on up. I'm on a podcast. So like, why would this be a cop? That's how Ray got me. What a long con. What a long con that would be. Joey commits for like five years to a podcast so he could get into a poker game. I also, I also, uh, they asked for the name of the podcast at the table. And so guys, look, I'm sorry for talking about the game if you if you End up actually listening. I will never give a location or any info that could get you in trouble. It's

Making the story. Yeah, it's made up story. It's also made already Yeah, it's really fun. And then it yes everybody starts and then I came to the gym the next day You were hammered at noon at work Yeah, because it was like I couldn't really sleep I got home as a liar couldn't get any winks couldn't get it Single wink and then so I guess was like alright. Let me just have like I drank like four slowly Nice but then you turned it up at the end of the day. Yeah, well then I went to John's bar and kept it going It was lovely trying to get me to come over and edit. Yeah

Edit yeah, that's our I couldn't do it. I didn't even tell you any slang Yeah. Edit, yeah, that's our... I didn't even tell you. It's our new slang. Edit, yeah, we gotta edit today. We're gonna, we like, you're just filming, like you just turn your camera on in your pocket and then at the end of the day go, we gotta edit this.

Let's get hammered. I mean, that was the funniest thing about that day is I was like, Halleray, Joey wants me to come over to edit. Yeah, the sketch we made. She's like, oh, okay, yeah, sounds productive. And then she checked my location like three hours in two. She goes, still at Archie's Brebrouwery, aren't you?

I'm still playing pool, I see, huh? There used to be so many times, Zach, in the day I would be like, I'm gonna go meet up, we're gonna make a video or whatever. I'd really go meet up with like David or Joey. And then I'd get there and be like, ah, fuck, the mic doesn't. It's not, I don't know.

Well, let's just go get hammered. But yeah, it was extremely fun. Oh fuck the mic doesn't it's not I don't know well But yeah, it's extremely fun And I refuse to and I was gonna be I was gonna stay I was gonna be like I'm not gonna win a bunch of Money from them and then leave and then look like I did a hit and run so I was like thing Yes, consider bad poker etiquette if you win a bunch and then bail before you could. Sounds like being smart. Where you could lose it. No, it's amazing.

It is smart. And that's what you should do at certain times at casinos and stuff like that. Yeah. It's like people that hate camping and video games. It's like, why would I not? There's the back of me is a wall. I'm safest here. I'm going to just sit here and shoot all of you.

Well, it's because it's a private. I'm not playing. It's a private game and they have the, you know, option to net not be back and buy you back. So it's like if you have bad banners or that's not trying to be funny all night and I'm talking to people and trying to just make sure I get invited back. I wish I knew how to play cards. I know all I know how to do is blackjack and just go hit me.

Yeah, I would love to teach it. It's very fun. And people, people, I don't know if they sucked or if I'm that good but it was just like you know one of those cushiest feeling good a lot of frauds there that are just kind of there cuz they're like this is cool just to generate by the way they're all too busy getting sucked off they're all too they're all too busy with multiple shots on goal what are the the guy from Thailand they just got back from Thailand He had he unzipped his backpack. There's two little children in it. He's just got back. He's putting them on that he's pushing them on the table. He was sitting next to a monkey and he sucks off the penis out of the backpack. He's shoving his head into the backpack. One of the hookers was sitting next to him and he would sit there like playing with her long hair like this while he was in the hand. Like he's an evil genius.

He was just twirling it around. Yeah, he was just twirling it around, not even looking at her, just like looking at his cards and then just going, hmm. Just like a real creepy degenerate vibe. That's classic romantic, you know, you're in an environment that most people don't get to be in. It was cool sitting there like that. That is cool.

Yeah. Only you. I stayed until like 6 a.m. or whatever. I used to wind up in weird situations like that but like not like that like I one time lined up at a you and I we were at a John and I went to a Like a pole dancing competition and law in a half. Oh, that was fucking and we were in a we were in a it was a bunch of it was a bunch of like like half naked women in a public storage container like Like it was like a sister's friend. Like it was like a sex trafficking, like then,

and they had a pole there and they were all dancing. And there was just people, like a bunch of like, kind of like hood dudes standing around. It's like eating chicken and waffles out of styrofoam, like combo boxers. And we were just all watching. It was a pole dancing competition. It was not like.

It wasn't like an underground need for speed thing. It was like, it was. It wasn't, it was an odd environment. Sounds like a bad thing. Something was up. It was not like it wasn't like an underground need for speed thing. It was like it wasn't it was an odd environment You don't usually go like let's go to this very respectable pole dancing competition It takes place in a storage container. They go we let them dance before we traffic them, you know, shut the doors and they sailed like prop Joe was standing there like watching like hookers like dance and he's eating fried chicken and waffles out of a bag. I'm gonna do a cockfight in Thailand, that was cool. That's cool.

Yeah, that's why the sketches thing have been through like underground thing. You would've fit right in if you know how to play poker, Johnny. I need to learn. Very proud of you Johnny with this, the lack of drinking thing. I, you know, I'm getting a little better at it.

I wanna kill myself. I've been going like weeks. I've been going like two weeks and I was really proud of myself at that. I'm getting a little better at it. I wanna kill myself. I've been going like weeks. I've been going like two weeks. And I was really proud of myself at that. I'm getting a little, like the hang of taking some breaks here and there. But I've been thinking about it. I don't, I really, I'm trying to,

I don't know if I could do a month because it's just not good for your mental health. There's too many reasons. I was just thinking like month by month. If you actually look at it, you're really, you're being really mean to yourself. If they set you up to fail. There's always a reason you could drink.

So like, I mean, I don't know, like go through, like what's in January? It's fucking inauguration day. I mean, you know, the election's stressful. You gotta drink then. Martin Luther King Jr. day, that's okay. Maybe he's supposed to be silver for that. And then you got February, let's go to February. You got ground's okay. I'd be silver for then you got February Let's go to February your ground all day you go. I'm not drinking in February. It's the shortest month

I can get away with this one. You go. Well, it's black history month. You kind of be disrespectful How do you you got to have a few drinks or rose apart? Cuz the whole month is for them, you know, and you're pissed off about that Your stars away drink your stars away a Valentine's Day, how do you do the President's Day? I have a few. Drink your sorrows away. Drink your sorrows away. Valentine's Day, how do you do it? President's Day.

Groundhog Day. Then we get to March and you got, how do you not get fucked up after Ash Wednesday? I mean, it's Ash Wednesday. Everybody's in a good mood. Everyone's in a good mood. Isn't that Mardi Gras or some shit? And then also March, St. Patrick's Day.

Yeah, yeah. It's impossible. It's impossible. Literally impossible to go dry in March. So then you can get to April. Listen, some April Fool's pranks are very stressful. You think it's real and you go, oh my God, it wasn't. You go, well, Jesus Christ,

my stress levels are through the roof right now. The Mountain Dew Twitter account just made up a fake flavor and now I need to go. Exactly. Or you go, hey, I'm taking the month of April off. April Fool's, no I'm not. No I'm not. Or you could play into it.

Also tax day, April 15th tax day. Fuck that. Impossible, you gotta drink it up in April. Oh. Then we get to May. We got Easter, you got Easter and you also got Earth Day in April. Earth Day.

That's a wash. Agave comes from the Earth. You gotta drink. Tequila. Easter's a huge drink a day. So that's a wash. Agave comes from the Earth. You gotta drink. Tequila. Easter is a huge drink a day. Then you get to May. Cinco de Mayo, Cinco de Drinco. Come on, you gotta drink in May, Mother's Day.

I got my birthday also on the same day as Mother's Day is here, so yeah, I'm gonna get twice as fucked up. Mother's Day. In honor of myself and my mother. Yep, and then you get to June. And who is not going to drink for aid al ada, the holiday. Juneteenth also.

It's a great holiday we all know about. And of course, flag day. Flag day, how can you forget? Flag day, you fucking get with your, you meet up with your buddies and you go, what a day. Yeah. The flags. Yeah.

All the flags. Check this out, you got flag day and father's day back to back, that's a bender if you ask me. Oh my God. That's two days, that's binge drinking my friend. And Juneteenth. And Juneteenth. So once again.

I'm angry drinking just like like. You're angry about Juneteenth, so you gotta drink it up. Then you get to July. I mean, nothing more need be said. July 4th, boom, done. Don't be the loser on July 4th. That sucks. Summer's starting.

Don't be an asshole. Oh, Yom Kippur, dude. Then you get August. And my birthday's in August. So, got a drink. Johnny's birthday too. I was gonna say August looks pretty good, but I didn't know about this.

Yeah, there's actually nothing in August. It just says Mark Fialco's birthday. I didn't know about that. So, my calendar says Mark's birthday, my birthday, John's birthday. We all got a drink. Sounds like the most dangerous month so far. It's a crazy month, August.

And then you get to September. And listen, I love moments. Labor Day, Labor Day is here. Yeah. Let's have a few because of we worked all the work we put all the work of the labor that we have done. You got a Rocha Shana and then you get October. I mean, Columbus Day. How do you forget his? No, and then you get October.

Columbus Day, how do you forget his sins? No, you don't celebrate him, he's a sinful man. How do you forget his sins? You gotta drink. No, he actually was a great guy. With 50 men, we could subjugate them. Indigenous People's Day, and you get to November. It's Columbus Day, motherfucker. I can't to November. I call it Thanksgiving. It's Columbus Day motherfucker.

I forgot about that. Christmas, Kwanzaa. I'm fucking Stone Cold Steve Austin smashing two cores like together screaming, it's Columbus Day motherfucker. So it's actually- The drugs will be all year. I think I got to it.

It's actually impossible. It's impossible. It's actually impossible to quit drinking for a full month. I'd love to hands are tied Truly. Yeah You got the earth day, slack day. Dan Neer can't go more than fucking a week and a half I don't know man. Based on the schedule. Sober people are actually scumbags. No, they're nuts. They're pieces of shit

You don't like fun you like celebrating. They're nuts. They're they're they're They're withholding they're withholding themselves from. You go, oh nine years sober I'm like, oh nine years you fucking disrespected indigenous people day. Nine years in a row, you piece of fucking shit. That's what you're doing right now, John. Yeah, you're a selfish asshole, actually. You know what used to happen on this land? Fucking redskins used to drink fire water, okay?

And they had a pretty good time. And you're racist. And you're racist for not celebrating how quickly they'd get hammered, and we would then kill them and take them for everything that they had Because they had different genes Yeah, I was a little sick of that, you know, I keep trying to think about it well this month and I go but there's an occasion I'm a hero for the amount that I drink currently because it sounds like I should be drinking. You are in constant celebration

Sorry for loving life at any given time I when you say you're drunk I go I'll go on my calendar I go well my god. Oh, yeah, Joey's having a good flag. I go it's 420 p.m. Yes, I'll write that is having a hell of an Earth Day right now You know? And you're losing your mind, you actually retired. I'm actually kind of. Why are you doing it? I don't remember what it's like being drunk.

Why are you doing it? I didn't, I was just a fucking wretched drunk. Well yeah you were, but now your life's like normal. I didn't like it. My anxiety's too much. But I'm just gonna take a year off and then slowly get back into it. It'll be good.

That seems fun. I'm gonna get into like wine. Take a year off, then get back into it. Get back into it, yeah. That would be fun. I'm gonna you back into it. That'll be good. That seems fun. I'm gonna get into like wine. Take a year off, think about getting back into it. Think about getting back into it, yeah. That would be fun. I'm gonna come back in. I would feel like being like born again. Yeah.

I wish I could do that. You're also boofing research chemicals, so it's not like. I haven't done research chemicals in a bit. Mushrooms don't count and I just don't have the desire to smoke weed. Somebody told me that those mushrooms that you're doing are packed full to the brim with a research chem. So I'm just doing cool like fucking x-men, you know project X You're doing can yeah doing worse than drinking a lot would say uh

Yeah, but I don't know I think it's more fun Because you don't know what's gonna happen. I support you no matter what Injecting myself with can look insanely Jack lately you got a big barrel chest going you've lost a lot of weight I'm I want to get to like prime more Maurice mode where I'm just like 20 pounds later. He looks like prime Maurice You look like I felt prime Maurice when I was heighted jujitsu. You look like a beautiful Maurice Oh, you would look like an age-riddled Maurice. I want to be an age-riddled Maurice. That's what I'm saying. You're prime Maurice right now Okay, well, I'll get I'll get more prime. Yeah primal Maurice. We're looking more chimp more chin So we're back chin you guys seen this

This this big buff black guy is making the rounds online where he films his morning routine where he wakes up at 4 a.m for absolutely no reason and he shows his morning routine and it's Meaningless I've seen him but I want to watch more Norm is he like or like? Norm? What is this? This type of these guys, these people? First off, you don't know how he has any of this money. Yeah, he lives like Will Smith in Bad Boys. It makes no sense.

He's like this insane beach front condo. He's super jacked. I'm sure he's like a day trader or some shit. One of those internet marketing jobs. So here's his morning routine. 3.52 a.m. This guy would kill it on the balloon dating show. Oh yeah.

Do you think he lives in the States? Yeah. Cause he only drinks out of bottled water so I'm starting to think that maybe he's like he's not as rich as you think he is. What if he lives in the only, he might live in the only high rise in Flint. He might live in a penthouse in Flint, Michigan.

In Derry, Indiana. He's literally like the leader of Flint, Michigan. It's like dystopian. Yeah, they look up to him and they go, oh man, he's, we woke up at 3.50 again. Matt Damon's riding a rocket to his apartment. Oh, the retarded black influencer is drinking Saratoga water and brushing his teeth again at 4 a.m.

I think if we if he did live in another country though like for our Like income if we lived in like Thailand we would you would think we were millionaires I got a feeling this guy probably makes like 80k a year and lives in like the Philippines. Yeah You think so? I don't know, we'll see. No, no, we'll see. Let me just do four pushups real quick on my balcony. He's also, keep in mind him setting up the camera everywhere and the lighting. Now I sit at my fake desk and I fake meditate.

Nicholas Rathen directed this. Now I read the first page. I read the first page of a book like LeBron. I think it's his gratitude journal. Huh? He's doing a gratitude journal, which is really gay. He's doing a gratitude journal. I'm really thankful for pussy and money and weed.

He's just drawing dollar signs. I'm thankful for jewelry and pussy. Big fat asses. I'm really thankful for multi-level marketing schemes. I'm thankful for my delt striations and my traffic. I'm thankful for the fact that God said if you just lift heavy things you get big. One day I will be just like Rupert Murdoch. We're going to be serious about the Lord's business.

Let me put real quick. Let me watch my prayer on my iPhone real quick. God first y'all, God first. Now let me dip my head into ice water. He hasn't done anything. Let me, he's also one of these assholes that has all sorts of stretchy materials to put on your arms and legs when you like

Go to the gym or play a pickup game at the Y. What are those? It's bullshit. It's absolute bullshit like I compress I don't know. That's what like this is what like fat people are supposed to wear in like 12-hour flights So they don't have a blood clot die. He just wears it cuz he thinks he's Allen Iverson Maybe he has a circulation issue. Sometimes Jack people have those now I think it's cause it looks cool. And they want it. It definitely looks cool.

They see guys in basketball games where shit like that. And they go like, you know, I've seen these, these, there's like an Asian kid at the YMCA area now shooting from like half court and missing horribly, but he's got all the gear on and he's, you know, he's like, yo, like I'm like Steph Curry. I just don't get it. It took him two hours to brush his teeth, go outside,

write in his gratitude journal. And then like like hit the pray and meditate as well. Well cuz he's cutting it up. Okay It's not the actual time. Yeah, I get it, but you know John has a point like what happened in those 10 minutes? Yeah. You went from putting on rings to putting a bag on with this lost 10 minutes. God damn, the kid's probably taking a dump. He can't show that. I do know for a fact the bracelet he's wearing

is like a $5,000 at least bracelet. Yeah. So he must be making some real dough. I don't know why that's so funny, dude. Just buff black dudes running full speed is so funny. 7.30 a.m. He goes out to his pool. Perfect swan dive. Perfect dive into the pool. This is Miami. Yeah, he's like, it's gotta be Florida.

This is Miami. Yeah, he's like, it's gotta be Florida. That was gonna be like, I guess. Yeah. Now he showers, gets the chlorine off, it's not even nine. He wipes his- Rubbs a banana peel on his face. Rubbs a banana peel on his face like he's trying to give like racist bae. It's bae.

That's insane. Yeah. Come on. I know. I mean- That's like if this guy was a Mexican guy and he's like, oh, time for my shampoo, and he pours a bunch of beans on his head. He's like, gotta get the dandruff out with the goiza beans.

I burned my tortilla mash. He cuts little holes. What the fuck are you doing? Rubbing in a bannet field, and he puts like a watermelon rind on his head. He's like, off to work. Why are you doing this? He's putting fried rind on his head. He's like, off to work. Why are you doing this? He's putting fried chicken skin on his face.

I bet in his life. He goes, 6.45, steal my neighbor's bike. Go through all the wallets I took from the concert last night. Yeah, I don't, I bet he would say like, the potassium in banana peels is excellent for your skin. I'm sure there's a I'm sure there's a legit when you look that good you do weird shit like that I my brain just goes to it's got to do something got to do something exfoliates

Oh, I'm sure and then so it's like, you know instead of using a wipe It's a natural exfoliation and then maybe give you some vitamins. I just the amount I think the whole skincare like like I think it's all a sham. I don't do anything, I have semi-decent skin. And I don't do jack shit. That's funny. I have pretty good skin. I've had women tell me I have pretty good skin.

I've never done anything for my skin. I do think you being bigger helps with the agastacy. My grandfather always said balloons don't wrinkle. Yeah, exactly. That is funny though, it's for like, John's at a skincare, he's like talking to people about skincare. That's Sephora. I don't do anything and look at me.

Yeah. To like models. A picture of health and beauty. It's like Dua Lipa. He's like, I don't need, you don't need to do any of the retinol or tretinoid. Look at me. I'm kick ass. But like at least you're right. So Redic Conferred keeps him in his green room just being like, yeah, he's me, I'm kick ass. But like at least you're right. So I'm in a conference room, just being like, yeah, he's my, he does my beauty stuff.

He's my skin guru. Yeah, he's my skin guru. I just think all this stuff though, like makes your skin worse. All these like fucking asses and shit women do. Cause like every woman. Until you get the right like system going and like regimen, it is, you can just, you'll just give yourself acne.

Cause there's always that bullshit purge period. Every girlfriend eventually tells their, like they like make their boyfriend like get on some sort of like routine and you gotta use this. And then three weeks in, the guy has horrific acne. And then he stops cause he's like, this is killing me. What is this? And they go, no, it's all a part of it.

It ruins you first. It just ruins you at the beginning. That's the toxins leading. It's the toxins, yeah. No, no, no, no, no, it ruins you first. It just ruins you at the beginning. That's the toxins leaving. It's the toxins, yeah, it's like, whoa. No, no, no, no, no, you're trapped now with me, you can't go anywhere, you're mine forever. If they were under there, I don't care if they're not showing, good.

Leave them under there. It's disgusting. It's disgusting, and you're the fuck, and you have the greatest skin on earth. I have fantastic skin. Love the idea of John becoming the face of Sephora. Good skin. Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha paper stuck to his shoe. Maurice runway shows. He's taking his ass down the runway. Taking his ass. Oh, I gotta go wipe my ass.

All right, so back to the, back to this guy. He loves. Somebody deliver an ice. Yeah, someone deliver an ice, yeah. So that feels a little third world, doesn't it? Possibly, or he just tells them to do it for his videos. It's like a friend.

So looking at it, bro, we gotta go ahead and get in at least 10,000. That's real business talk. That really sums up the modern businessman. Sell it. Yeah, man, sell it. Sell it for a million dollars. He's talking to Hayley Welch there.

He's talking to the Hawk Tooth girl on the phone. She's like, well, okay, I'm just gonna go to bed. So we're stealing millions tomorrow. Okay, so normal you people do scare me, but I like $10,000. Well, okay, you know. Mixing eggs, turkey bacon, some avocado toast, to get served again.

Yeah, okay, so this guy's got like a bunch. The bottled water thing, the exclusive bottled water thing, it makes me feel like he's not in America. This is my favorite one, because the bottle of water drops and falls and breaks, so, and he films it too, so that means he did it twice. Oh. He runs across the glass like die hard.

That means he dropped it in this frame, and then he got another one, and he dropped it to get a close up of it breaking. Oh, he's showing off his slave He didn't even pick it up He has a white slave Yeah Wow this is the dream

He's got a white slave He's flexing with his slave It's just the black dreams He's flexing with his slaves Yeah dude More ice bath for his face More face bath for his face. And then he's got the Asian people over and they're sawing off his toenails. I like the light pink.

You do? Okay, yeah, it looks nice. Ready, fire, aim. What do you think that book's about? It's about cum shots? It's about about cum shots. Yeah. It's about massive cum shots. Optimizing your load. How to optimize your load. That's by Peter North. Ready, fire, aim.

Ready, fire, aim, the Peter North story. Forward by Lexington Steel. Oh. Oh. Oh. Look at how white the soles of his feet are. Honestly, this is gay, dude. Yeah. It's extremely gay.

It's so gay. If you're really into like, like, whatever, what is it called? Pedicures. Pedicures and self-care, whatever, you are kind of gay. Yeah. Thank you. Thank you, slave. He's got a big H.

What do you think his name is, like, Harold? Yeah. How you doing brother? This guy's awesome. Hey brother. Are we connected to the Bluetooth? What is his life? How did you find this beauty? That looks like Miami. That did look like Miami, yeah. He's by himself.

He's by himself. And so this is what he does. So look at him like run here. If I was on the beach I saw that it's like By the way it's so funny to be this in shape and to do his thing every morning and you like aren't preparing for the Super Bowl or the NBA Finals or the Olympics. You just put on suits and like steal money from people with your fake marketing company or whatever you do.

Listen, listen, listen. Listen. Listen. Listen. Listen. Listen. Listen. I feel like him and Aaron the Plumber are destined to meet yeah, they're destined to do battles magneto and professor X Yeah, well Aaron the plumber is like a team oover

Like they punch each other at the same time and they both die they both fly back a mile You know I said a car I bet he has a tiny dick for sure you think so now I got a hog on him what do we talk about? He has to have huge hogs. You never know. He might have taken his dick down a size with all his stuff that he does. You think he's Natty? No I mean that also that only shrinks your balls. It doesn't trick your car. No, it doesn't trick your car. You think his friends that are filming him from the cars driving actually runs you think they ever they get back to the apartment and they're just like, but why they look at him and they go I guess his name is Ashton Hall.

They go Ashton. but why are we doing this? Because I want people to think I'm faster than a car. Because I'm faster than cars. Because I'm the fastest, richest man of all time. What do you mean why are we doing this? He's obsessed with Saratoga bottled water. Oh, and he loves putting his face in ice water. Why are we doing this? Sounds like someone's mad they're not as fast as a car.

God bless Ashton Hall. That's slower than a car call. Good for Ashton Hall, man. Ashton Hall. Yeah, I don't know. It's wild that you could be like that jacked and handsome and black and you're somehow still lame. Yeah, exactly.

It's like, it's incredibly frustrated for me to watch. Yeah, like, the guy is a loser. He's a loser. Despite having all that money and. And an incredible body. And an incredible body. And handsome face. Yeah, like you're.

All your slaves. You do suck. Yeah. Like you suck, you suck. You do suck. Yeah, like you suck It's really miss slave owner of all times You own people and you're nerd Calvin candy doing like a get ready with me I'm like, what the hell? I'm like, what the hell? I'm like, what the hell? I'm like, what the hell? I'm like, what the hell? I'm like, what the hell? I'm like, what the hell? I'm like, what the hell?

I'm like, what the hell? I'm like, what the hell? I'm like, what the hell? I'm like, what the hell? I'm like, what the hell? I'm like, what the hell? I'm like, what the hell? I'm like, what the hell?

I'm like, what the hell? I'm like, what the hell? I'm like, what the hell? I'm like, what the hell? I'm like, what the hell? I'm like, what the hell? I'm like, what the hell? I'm like, what the hell?

I'm like, what the hell? I'm like, what the hell? I'm like, what the hell? I'm like, what the hell? I'm like, what the hell? I'm like, what the hell? I'm like, what the hell? I'm like, what the hell? I'm like, what the hell? I'm like, what the hell? Suns out, it's warmer out. Starting to warm up. They've released the, listen. Wisconsin has thawed. Exactly.

It's Mad Max and they are letting the water flow down that fucking, down that canyon. Body cam season, back. Body cam season! So this is a woman that commits a sex crime in a movie theater. So I think she gets got jack sex crime in a movie theater. Mmm. So I think she gets got like jacking off in a theater, like alone. Pleasing herself after hours in a movie theater,

officers deal with much more than they bargained for. Is she talking to you? She wasn't. Oh, she was? No, she wasn't. Oh, okay. Mam, you gotta go. They don't want you here. You gotta go.

Is she still naked? The theater's like mostly empty by the way, so that's kind of bullshit I don't think she was oh, I guess she has her tits out. Why are they blocking it? Well, they said after hours I don't know what that means like was the theater already like the movie must have ended and she just stayed there for the credit She's like, oh they did the catering I was just trying to I was just a special thank you to the government of Canada. I'm just trying to squirt to conclave. It's like 12 angry men but with the Pope. It's a lot like 12 angry men except you know there's not a care.

There's not an actor in it that has the gravitas of Henry Fine. I'm not sure. I'm not sure. I'm not sure. I'm not sure. I'm not sure. She knows all this. It's a lot like 12 Angry Men, except, you know, there's not an actor in it that has the gravitas of Henry Fonda, but still, I like it. They go, man, that's an incredible observation. I need you to put your clam away, though, and get the fuck out of the theater.

That's a great observation, ma'am. I agree, but your pussy is out. Ambulance? Are you all right? What? Can I get an ambulance here for the female? She's just, I don't know, moaning. Ma'am, do you have? What? Can I get an ambulance here for the female? She's just, I don't know, moaning. Ma'am, do you have a name?

She's just moaning. That's awesome, she's in pleasure mode. Do you know where you are right now? Yes, we checked with McGuffin. She had about 13 conclave cosmos and she's acting out. She's homeless, right? No. Just a horny lady. And she's acting out. She's homeless, right?

How are you? Just a horny lady. Where are you going? Where are you trying to get to? You fool, Ria. Where is home? Pure Nirvana. Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha What worse home you know I'm a list stubs member You're gonna treat me this way Like this fuck I got $15 a reward you talk to every a list of members this way

And now we need to make sure that you get the help you need Well, I need you to tell me where you live and who you are before I can... Can you let me, I gotta go shit this 805 bottle out my pussy in the bathroom real quick. I'm gonna shit it out of my pussy. I'm gonna shit it out my motherfucking pussy. Sir, there's a Saratoga Springs water bottle shoved up my ass right now. Cause I need to make sure that you can take care of yourself.

I'm very well kept away from you. Oh, I just did take care of myself. I'm very well-kept. Oh, I just need to take care of myself. I'm not trying to touch you. I'm not trying to touch you, but I'm going to go right here because we're going to wait until the paramedics come. I don't need a paramedic. I appreciate you, but I already came. It's like I just... You can touch me all you want, baby, but I came. If you were here 30 minutes ago trust me we would have been doing all that you could have handcuffed me you freak you freaky

ass got one a handcuffed me so you guys think like people were in the movie the movie ended and throughout the movie they're like masturbating and moaning yeah or like maybe a worker came in and sweep up the popcorn. And she's still there just like, wah, wah, wah! She's, the guy's just trying to sweep candy. He looks up and there's a gigantic black woman. He just mops. Wah, wah, wah! He's just mopping squirt under her actively. I would, it wasn't irregular when I worked

at the movie theater that I'd find panties in the movie theater. Really? Or under like bras, panties. I would find, I one time went in and a woman was writhing on the ground, like dry humping the ground, but she's on mushrooms What do you think there? Oh, she was a lot. That's what I keep thinking like what movie this was like six months ago Oh six months ago. So like

Let's say one of them days, but who knows it's like flow. She's like I don't know. What could it be? Yes, let's go free. Yeah, I don't know what could it be? Cast a girlfriend? Yeah, I don't know. I just like never go to the theater anymore. So I don't even. What would a woman want to see like a hot guy, right? But I can't even think of like, Oh maybe it was Craven the Hunter. Yeah. Craven the Hunter.

That bull Wolverine. Sure. Yeah. That's six months. Well maybe she, who's a, who's a, who's a like a, like a black male, like beauty that she wanted to go see in the theater. Like who would that be? Well, Ashden's six months. Well maybe she, who's a black male beauty that she wanted to go see in the theater?

Who would that be? Ashman's not there. Gladiator 2. She watching Denzel. Denzel maybe. Yeah, yeah. Maybe, yeah, maybe Denzel. That's an odd one.

Yeah. It's tough to pin down. What really gets a fat black woman going in the theater? Maybe we'll learn a clue here. Let's keep a lot of things. She's fat, so maybe it was just like the popcorn commercials. A bunch of crunch got her going.

She pulled her panties down. When they started talking about a movie. Let's all go to the lobby. She's like oh fuck. That roller coaster with the popcorn popping. Let's all go to the lobby. Oh fuck. She wants to eat the Lemley lamb.

She's jamming a Toblerone up her pussy. We just want you to talk to them really quick just to make sure that you're okay. Oh honey, I'm more than okay. She goes, let me call the real police. Not a bunch of strippers who are here to strip for me. Honey, I'm okay. She goes let me call the real police Already came I don't know who called you strip is over I'm not trying to touch you. I'm up if you want to stop me I do because I need to make sure that you're safe. I am safe. I'm a grown-ass woman and I'm in my husband's theater Magic Johnson, that's right

Yeah, what could who she was mean her okay we got magic Johnson's son here Sure is her I bet her husband just works at the concession stand. I think she just made that up. She's crazy. She says, my husband's theater. He's a janitor. He's like a janitor. She's like, baby, I own the theater.

We are AMC. Yeah, right. Excuse me. Okay. Do you even know where you are? Excuse me. Do you know what city you're in? Excuse me. Do you even know where you are? Excuse me. Do you know what city you're in?

Excuse me. Okay, we gotta wait. Do not touch me. Then don't walk into me. Do not touch me. You're standing in front of me. Do not touch me. Or you and this entire- Why is nobody going like, bitch, you just jerked off in the theater, you can't leave? Because they're trying to be nice. And also, listen, everyone has their needs.

And you know, fucking, sometimes you never know when the when nature calls also She's hot Her out don't she looks like if destiny's child combined If they all ate each other like Fabergé eggs or something they combine like a robot Yeah, they all could be like like Fabergé eggs or something. No, they combined like a robot. I think they all could be like power agents. Like a Gundam, yeah. But the actual reason is because she was very obviously mentally ill

and like she was delusional. I don't think she's mentally ill. I think she's fucking stupid. No, when they first came, she was saying stuff that made it seem like she doesn't know where she is. So they're like, okay, we're not gonna try to reason with her logically because there's no point. So let's just try to calm her down deescalate and you know get her you know help mentally and stuff

fake as She thinks they're fake cups Let me walk to where the light is well I need to know who you are and make sure that you're fine You know what do not cuz you're pleasing your we're gonna wait not touch me. I need to know who you are and make sure that you're fine. You know what? Do not cuz you're pleasing your we're gonna wait not touch me I need to know who you are. You don't need to know anything cuz they don't want you on this property I will leave this property. Why wait until I leave it? So you have to leave from the property right now. Yes, that makes no sense

Wouldn't it be trespassing if I come back to the property? Yes, so I back no you don't excuse me sir can we speak out here where the light is that's what you want to talk in the dark we can talk over here y'all are weird y'all be weird oh shit I got it she was jacking off to the Covenant really how just cuz there's a poster for it I forgot that came out she's like can we speak at MacGuffins please because there's a big poster for it. I forgot that came out. She's like, can we speak at McGuffin's please? She's like, there's something about. Let's continue this conversation at McGuffin's. I need a Long Island at McGuffin's.

There's something about the devastation of the Middle East that gets me. He made a promise and he went back for him. I really wanna know what movie. I really don't think it was The Covenant. Wait, we might see. Show it. Show it off the theater.

No, they don't even do that at theaters anymore. They don't do that anymore. Theaters are so fucking lazy. They don't even fucking say on the marquee what you're walking into. I think it's prevent from like movie hopping. Yeah, which I still do. It actually makes movie hopping more fun.

It's a, you never know what you're gonna get. A little Russian roulette, yeah. You have no clue what you're walking into. I know. No, I get it. Why do you wanna talk to me so bad? Because now. Because you're walking into Because now fucking hot second time we've been out here because I'd love you Ultra screen DLA what theater? Oh shit here it is

It's green oh She was masturbating and scream Why the heck not what the hell? Jenna Ortega she's hot now, you know, Mikey Madison's the hell? Jenna Ortega, she's hot now. You know? Mikey Madison's also in that. Jenna Ortega was in that? And Mikey Madison. Mikey Madison was in that.

That sweetheart was in Scream. What the hell is she doing? She's an Oscar winner. She plays the murder. She plays Ghostface. She does? Yeah, it's a big reveal. What the hell?

Yeah. Where were we yesterday? You hear the movie is done. Everyone has left. Where were we yesterday? We were over at the app. Maybe she thought, like, the name of the movie is how your spoke like she's like I need to come so hard I screamed Right?

Okay Do you want that? Yes I would love it thank you What were the Applebee's complaining? Oh so she's gonna get trespassed everywhere around town She was coming so hard the Applebee's complaint? Oh, so she's gonna get trespassed everywhere around town. She was coming so hard the Applebee's next door called. I can't be coming anywhere in the whole game! Okay!

I can't be on stream! Hey, she gonna tell me I can't come at TGI Friday! Where can I come? Minute to the app! Where are they? Who else do I thank God? It's Friday! And if you say chilies, I'll fucking kill you!

Playing here because you're doing the same exact thing what am I doing you here past the movie everyone's gone it's okay you're here by yourself pleasing yourself in the movie theater okay yes you were it's all on body camera I did That's good. That's good. Good response, sweetheart. Good response. So you're saying that you were recording.

What the fuck? This is not on the premium. Fucking otter. Shut up, Joey. Tech issues. Shut up. Gotta imagine if this guy was on Apollo 13. When a woman is calling.

Those astronauts would have been blasted off the Mars. Oh, so you're recording. Huh? You guys both shut up. You shut up. Shut up. No respect. No respect for me.

Shut up. Fine, I will. And play the video, shut up. Chernobyl was an otter thing. Oh yeah, that was, yeah, there was an otter. That RBMK reactor is created by otters. There was somebody watching the reactor That was probably a guy Devon's uncle. Yeah

Dev could you play the video and stop being a diva? I didn't like anything you both just said Sorry, you're very good Yeah, I am a tech master Mmm, could you buy this? Yeah, I bought it and plugged it in. Well, you are you capable of that? No, I will say every time every time Joey takes over he does break it so much. Yeah, it is also a funny thing. Yeah, but I don't use it every day for like years. Imagine how good I'd be if it is. Well, the ATEM Mini Pro is a complete piece of shit that has a bunch of thank you

No, why are you recording me without my permission cuz I have to deal with you No, you don't have to do anything. You want to deal with me. That's why you harass me He's stepping into a trap I did and what did they say? They said they want you to trespass this who was I with you're with management no Okay, I need your ID. I don't have an ID. Okay. I need your name. You don't need to know my name I do because you can go to jail if you don't so here's the here's the options Okay, I need to make sure that you're able to care for yourself That man's has got to be You're able to care for yourself. Go ahead, put the cups on! Man, this has gotta be rough when she gets hung.

You have to explain this. Like, so how was the movie? Your whole, she's like, really good at first. Then the body cam comes out. Yeah. Your whole family. She doesn't give a fuck. All the clumps sitting around you laughing at you.

Hercules, Hercules, devastating stuff. I mean, I'm not even trying. That wasn't I wasn't trying to be like rude there. I imagine she's huge. I imagine she goes home to a family of clumps. Yeah, public masturbating. Yes, of course. And they six months later, this video comes out

and they're laughing their fucking ass off. Just human human cancer cells. They all just look like the same. Turn that shit off, stop playing it every time we get together, motherfuckers. Uncle Wico, can you stop? And he's just like, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, you show your pussy at the motherfucking theater.

Hey, hey, hey, hey, bitch, you crazy. I just keep thinking about all the clowning that will go on in this young woman's life. Good God! Nobody clowns better than black people. It's true. Good. You just mad because you ain't get your nut up baby. I be coming anywhere I want anytime I want.

Scream, three, scream, five, six, seven, eight, any scream they make. I'm be coming in that. When the last time You came in a scream Who has breast like that my I need to make sure that you're able to care for your Okay, cuz last time you wouldn't talk to me You want to go to jail what is your name? What is your name? Then you who it's just Danny She's so good at making them seem retarded. What is your name? Daniel who? It's just Danny. She's so good at making them seem retarded. What is your name?

Danny, will he got a job here? He does. So Danny. No, these officers are wearing masks because their pussy stinks. Or is it like a health thing or COVID? Combination of both. When did the scream come out? During COVID?

I don't know. 2023, March, 2023. No, I was wearing, were they wearing masks? You can see the body cam. Yeah, interesting, March 12th. No last name, where's your name? I'm Alex, what's your name? Don't worry, you know my name, don't you?

I don't, I don't know you. That's what we need to, we just wanna make sure that you're okay. I don't know you. I wanna get to know you though. You beautiful queen. I think it's your number. We gotta hear it, don't be arrested. So to get to know you though. You're beautiful queen She's pulling a joker it's her plan to get arrested and go back to police station and masturbate I'm asking you. I mean, I just told you my name. Can you tell me your name? I'm Alex Was it what's his name? What's your name? You talk to me. This is the person that called you right? Yeah. Because he was concerned that you were not acting normal and you weren't leaving the theater when it's appropriate.

What's normal? What is normal? You were supposed to leave the theater when the movie stopped. You were still there. You asked me nicely to leave, you didn't want to leave. So that's trespassing. When did they ask me nicely to leave? This is the first time hearing of this. I was still... Okay, well I'm just informing you now. So now you understand. I was still marinating on the movie that's gonna have fun just informing you now. I was still marinating on the movie. I was still marinating on the movie. She goes, I was still marinating on the movie. Marinating on the movie.

I be reflecting on the theme. I scream. I was reflecting. I was getting introspective, baby. See, baby, I a Cinephile. I sit through the motherfucking credits. Cinephile public master banner. New characters. I watch stream, it's my 12th past midnight. But my name you know already and I don't even know his name so he no longer is a manager here and you as well. What's your husband's name?

My husband's name is... Does it, if I'm, am I fake married? I don't know, correct me. Is your husband here today? He is, but he's still in the movie theater. There's nobody in the theater. Okay. So you go home?

Maybe. Where do you live? She just said her husband's still in the theater. Yeah, it's pretty scary. She's crazy, she's getting fat. She's being delusional. It's close by, enough to call a lifting, it home like I'm about to do an idea yesterday I'm about to be permanently ruining the alignment in my lift

Me miss be nasty and we'll be back Okay, cuz see if you don't answer the questions appropriately with the answers we expect we kind of assume that So how do you just have expectations of a person? I don't know you don't know me. How do you expect me to say anything? You don't know what's going to happen. If I ask you your name, you're just I'm so-and-so whatever it is your name is Why are you giving me such a difficult time? We're just trying to make sure that you're mentally aware of the situation What is the situation? You're trespassing. You're masturbating in a movie.

What do you mean? You keep giving us a circle. He goes, you're, I mean you were masturbating in a movie theater. My name is Regalisha AMC Johnson. You want to know my name? Regalia Pacific MC Johnson. My name is Pacific Theatrica Johnson. You're gonna be okay.

If you leave out of here and something happens, you run across Randall Road and get hit by a car because you're not acting rational. Baby, I hit cars. They don't hit me. You run across the street, car car hits you we total the car Family of five is dead now you walk away on skates They go excuse me ma'am are you though are you the fat rapper that destroys So I'm saying we just want to make sure you're going to be okay.

You're telling me that your husband's here but he is not. Okay. Okay. So that's our problem. He's probably in a business meeting with the shareholders. And he's just like cleaning a bathroom. That's where they meet with the motherfucking shareholders. My husband owns this whole motherfucking thing. Or somebody left and you didn't realize that.

That's a big worry. That's what we're trying to figure out. If everything's okay or... Hallucinating means what? Why do you have to be so... What is hallucinating? What is hallucinating? What's the definition? You're thinking that something's there but it's not. And that's what I... You said that you were in the theater with your husband. Well, can you hallucinate when I leave off the door, please? You're saying that you were here with your husband and he is not.

Who is not? Your husband. What? Who is he? Whoever you said you were with. You want to go to the hospital? Figure something out? Do I look like I want to go to the hospital? I know you don't. I don't need medical attention. I'll go to the hospital if we can put some crystal light in the IV.

How about that? In the hospital don't you get to sign up for yourself? That you're not answering questions appropriately. What is appropriate? Your name. Appropriate to whom? I've asked you your name several times you keep refusing. That's not appropriate Are you a police officer? No, but I'm just trying to get First name I spoke I told you my name I told you what day it is I told you what movie I saw I told you what time the movie ended up I told you I was working now tell me where my husband Kevin foggy is

Yesterday too I tried talking to her. Why? Why? Nicely but competitive at this point. We'll handle it on our end here. Sounds like she's going to be the police for your house. We'll handle it over here. Get on the fucking ground! We'll handle it from here. Light her up.

Stop resisting! Bob Iyer watched and he goes, guys, I am so sorry. She's with me. Yeah, sorry. My wife is in a helicopter. Bob Iger. It's Bob Iger's wife. Walt Disney reveals himself for the first time in 70 years. He goes, honey, let's go home.

I just left Cri-O for this. Honey. I trust that's on the property, so I do need to know. Honey, let's go. I just left cryo for this Robert De Niro walks out of the theater Let's get out of here I like scream, you know Sweet tea as if it's the drink. Present on call harassing me. I'm not trying to harass you,

it's just you're doing accents to get called Sweet Tea. Her business name is Sweet Tea, so she's a hooker. This is your big break. I'm done talking, 702 on two. Oh, now you're done talking. Name? Debbie. Debbie.

If you would just give me your name, this would be a lot, I just gave you my name. It would be done a lot quicker. No, you didn't. You said your name is Sweet Tea, which is a nickname. That's a record-level name. Okay. You said your name is Sweet Tea, which is a nickname. That's a regular name. Okay.

You said you had this. She's a rapper. Of course. She's a rapper. So it's everything but your name. So what is your name, and then I can get you out of here. Like your government name that's on your ID. If you have your ID, that would work a lot quicker.

Okay then, what's your name? Oh you mean my slave name. You want my slave name. I don't know your government name. That's why I'm asking. So if you gave me your name, this would expedite the process. Fine, Dikembe Mutombo. Hahaha.

What is your government name? Glenn Big Baby Davis. Dominic. Dominic? Yes. I don't have to tell you that but you have to tell me your name. My name is Ray Lewis. Hahaha.

Fine, George Foreman. Marshawnist. Okay. Fine, George Foreman. Marshawn Lynch, ever heard of him? My name is George Floyd. Hey, what's your name? My name is Derek Chauvin, it's nice to meet you. It's good to see you again. Good to see you again. Fine, well wait, and then if I can can't find it then you're coming with me.

If somebody had never wanted to be on the property, you sure would want me here. Why, Dominique? Because I have to trespass you. If I come back here, this guy will remember. I promise you. So, if I tell you my name, will you leave me alone? Yeah, that's the whole point. I just need your name.

But we didn't already know, honey. Just cooperate, Lily. They're like saying the- Yeah, they're actually like saying like, we'll let you out of here. She's not working on their rules. She's not even in their astral plane. She doesn't.

She's playing 40 Chess. Oh, dude. She's in a fifth dimension right now. I'm convinced that they say her name like some like demonic curses is gonna come out and like the sky's gonna be blotted with red and an earthquake will happen. I was told not to utter this for a million years. I can't actually vocalize my name with my vocal cords.

My name is a frequency that human ears can't even register. You wanna get vibrated until you explode? Cause I'll say it. vibrate until you explode. Cause I'll say it. How about I freeze you and break you? My name is awesome like tremor shit. I mean... Good morning!

Let me, I'm gonna check the attached person on call. God, I love a rainy street. Did the gonna see I love a rainy paramedics bail Paramedics bail paramedics love rainy streets. Do you look isn't a wet street? Just one of the most most Aesthetically pleasing things on earth who is the director? I figured out let's just hose down the streets. Oh fuck I want to say it goes back a ways, but I know who you're talking wasn't it freaking It might have been, where you just, even if it's not a cloudy sky, you just wet the street.

Yeah, everything looks better. After that, everybody's certain. Yeah. We just need your name, your actual... I cannot give you my name. If I gave you my name, we would all die. Do you want black wings, so I can throw it out of my back? I am a fallen angel.

I kill Gabriel. If I say my name, Gabriel's horn will bleed. And you'll never hear names with your human ears again. Are you prepared to fuck Gabriel? And then the prophecy will be completed. You think she's afraid to give her name cuz like she's got warrants or whatever I think she doesn't remember her name at this point might not sound like she might have a few run ins with a lot She's saying she's got kicked out of a an Applebee's like yesterday. She seems familiar with the concept of being trespassed

Yeah, just trespass me. I won't come back. that's it. In this bag you'll find the spear of destiny. She gives them her name and they're like, ma'am, you have a warrant out for your arrest for putting red lobster out of business. The endless shrimp. Ma'am, when I put your name in, it says contact the Pentagon immediately. Ooglok the Conqueror, contact Pentagon. Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha I know it's crazy, but like I don't know. I don't think I'd last that long John is I would go to the four of us. Well, that's usually the the claws of those things is like it's if you start sharing it

They cut you off. Okay. Well, then how about Well, we all good buyer. What if we bring a bag and we keep hiding? Cuz like how I used to do Korean barbecue used to hide all my extra beef under the salad Put in your pockets at the end. Yeah, I've been with John at Cream BBQ all you can eat. And he. So I'll eat like pig. It was like the weirdest amount of food that I've ever seen anybody eat.

The amount was so much. And then he left at some point. He took a dump mid meal. Kept going. You gotta clear out a room. Then went out and got a guy. Puked. I think then kept going after.

Oh my God. Yeah dude. We used to go to Cream barbecue. I'm like a cat I just eat till I die we'd we'd eat a ton and then we'd go like We'd leave one person at the table and we'd go into the car and smoke a blunt to reload our appetite power of our hunger We'd come back in and go for another like hour They would stop serving you after a while and you'd have to act like you're ready for the check and then they come over and you're like brisket.

Yeah, exactly. They stop coming by for a while. Oh, quite low, you tricked us again. Yeah, well, fucking Denny's used to have the all you can eat pancakes. I think they might still have them, but it's like two to four dollars, something like that. Yeah, pancakes are tough though, man.

Me and my friends though, we'd like fucking house them and they found out that we were all sharing it and they lost their shit on us all sharing it and they like lost Their shit on us. This guy was like ready to kill us and we had like pay extra money for it. What? All right. I thought it was like all you can eat. Yeah, that's not there was a waiter at Denny's in Tunga That was like for sure has like killed like a million people like the scariest most like stone-cold like Truly like an Anton Shigeru type But like really dark like Aztec looking Mexican

I've never seen him smile he had like gold teeth here and there and just like scarred down his eye and I was like holy shit and that guy screamed at me for unlimited pancakes I was like whatever you want me to do I'll do it. Holy shit I didn't know they were allowed to do that shit this lady's at her share of unlimited pancakes This lady's at her share of unlimited pancakes. Mmm. Tell me you're being arrested. Alright, wait, can you wait until my ride gets here?

No, you need to tell me right now what's your name? No, I'm not gonna let you break another fucking Uber. Hehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehe I'm going to be arrested. I'm going to be arrested. extension on you know that's where they link two pairs of handcuffs together that's fun yeah I like that yeah it's very funny to have that moment as a fat person like I gotta get my life together I'm too fat to be arrested that was my fair moment I'm watching those old episodes of cops is when they're like I'll bust out the double cuffs cuz those guys huge do you have anything I need

they shouldn't have yes it's nice and loose. Yes it is. They're not supposed to be comfortable. So, I can't just do it. Now how am I going to masturbate with my hands behind my back like that, huh? You tell me that, genius! I mean, I can still get a finger in my booty hole. I can sit on it. It's not the same. Damn, she's...

I'm making sure there's nothing in there. I don't think these cuffs can hold me. They find... Full of humans. They find some THC gummies that are root bear flavored. Root bear? THC gummies are so funny! They love root bears so much! I just got the f***ing ham off the cart. Put my s*** down. They're cheddar biscuit flavored.

She's just been sitting behind Edibles. She must be high on Edibles and she she's envisioned that she has a husband Somewhere in the building that was fucking this shit out of her that never appears this husband She's she's she thinks she has this gorgeous husband that works. That is mister. Mr. Movie theater that never appears Husband in there! He tidy! My hubbin everywhere! Ashton runs full sprint through those doors.

You came on the car you s***! Weenie Hut Jr. Ass Motherfucker! Weenie Hut Jr. Ass Motherfucker! That was good! Weenie Hut Jr. Ass Motherfucker! Ah that was good. Bro? Weenie Hut Jr. Ass Motherfucker! Put it in there now! Don't tell me it's going in there! Junior ass motherfucker Smash cut to the uncle at Thanksgiving watching her body cam footage laughing. I heard you go. Haha. Weenie ass. That's a good one Regal Eisha AMC Johnson, you did get his ass that night. Nobody gets Regalisha. Nobody fucks with Regalisha AMC Johnson.

I knew that since he was a little one. All right, we're gonna leave this here, we'll get it later. Man, he better. All right, we're gonna go. I'm not going down there. I'm a Cinephile. Let's go. Y'all better let me out in time for the fresh connection at the Newark tomorrow.

Let's go. Let's go. Let's go. I'm not going to hit you. Let's go. I'm supposed to jack off to Dr. Travago tomorrow. I swear to motherfucking God if I miss La Strada at the A. If y'all don't let me out in time.

To watch Dr. Zhivago. I know you hit me. Throw me with that bag again bro. Bro get his hand off of me. It's snowing. Get his hand off of me. It's a cinematic night. You hold me.

Get his hand off me. What if she starts wheeling her Chebian into the handicap section? Okay. Get your hands off me. Get your hands off me. Get your hands off me. The craziest thing is this was filmed in Tampa, Florida

and it's never snowed there before. Until they started arresting her. The weather's really, what the fuck is happening? Her eyes go completely black. She's like, aw. Can I trust me? I can make it a whole lot colder. Hahahaha.

Remember the Texas freeze? That was me. Do I guys, how is she sweating? Hahahaha. It's freezing. Can we go to this car right here? A form of locus. When I get

When I get back to it. We're gonna stay on the sidewalk right here. I swear to God if I can't jack off to a Citizen Kane tomorrow at 3pm, I'm gonna kill somebody. It's gonna get real windy here in Miami. Oh baby, I will summon Rosebud so motherfucking quick. I just had this really funny thought of them tying her to the back of the police car. Like a Christmas tree on the top of it. Like a rope, but she's just dragged

all the way to the police station. Dragged, like on the ice. It's just a pile of ripped, a trail of ripped up asphalt behind her. I just rode all the way. She's destroying the road. She's not injured at all. By her leisure.

Her legs are fine. Why are you tying me to this rope? It's like water skiing, she's pulling me up. We're street cleaning. I'm gonna go and get my phone. I don't have a problem. How are you doing this sheet? Sit down, sit down. I Can't flick my shit to the killing of a Chinese book tomorrow God good for

Well, wait what happened here? When his T'Lisha was charged, obstructing. She is innocent until proven guilty in a court of law. I agree. In the human courts cannot stop me. Damn right she's innocent. Damn fucking right she's innocent until proven guilty. Connor, what is this Nazi in blackface? I don't even know. I think it might be a skin condition actually.

I don't even know what's going on, but he's just trying to rap. It's just one of these things. You know when you're scrolling on Instagram all day, and you're like, how did I get here? Yeah. Oh. It might be tattoos.

Uh, let's see. Those are tattoos with a beard over it, for sure. He's rapping along to Runaway? No, I think it's makeup. We're family, but it's not a hug that they handed me. Everyone I ever loved abandoned me. Didn't see the bigger plan when they laughed, they did it candidly.

Ran out of gas, not anyone ever landed a hand on me. Just threw me some trash when they passed. You won't have any fun, you'll have to show up. Oh, come on, fuck man. He goes, let me post it anyway, that was the best I got. Oh, that sucks. The bar would be like, my family abandoned me. And I was the best I got. Oh, that sucks. The bar would be like, my family abandoned me.

And I'd be like, and why? That guy sucks. Why would they do that? That guy sucks, what's this guy? What's this guy gonna do? Oh, this is one of those pedophile hunters. Predator gets caught trying to meet a 14 year old girl and starts thanking the catchers.

I couldn't find the full video, but. He's like, thank you guys, you guys got me out of my own hell. Truly, it's him just being like, y'all doing the work. You know? Like guys like us are evil. Ha ha! What do they call that? A virtuous pedophile? Yeah.

Did you? Yeah. What the hell does it start? I know this, I know this, this happened. Whoa, look at his eyes. Oh my god. It's Sid from fucking Toy Story. Oh Whoa Fucking toy looks like fucking Krillin from Dragon Ball Z. That's crazy. Oh my god Thank you. That's like oh, he's returning like pedophile like you like the evolution of the pet of our word like Start putting your eyes like farther apart on the side of your head so you can see more like yeah It's like you know like a prayer Yeah, you know gamers get like the dent on your head so you can see more like Yeah it's like you know how like Prey eyes

You know how gamers get like the dent on their head from like the headphones? That's from looking at little children's booties That's crazy All around you Because like what you guys are doing is actually very smart Okay Because like what you do is actually smart But the actual people that you do try to catch

Right, well we just caught you Yeah I know, I know No, no, I noted good job, and it's actually quite a genius move cuz I'm actually pedophile I'm a pedophile you guys got me so I'm gonna I was going to fuck kids if you didn't catch me Oh, that's actually smart to stop. I just wanted to say uh touche So well done on well done. Uh so where do you guys want to curb stommy? Which alleyway do you guys want to take me into and pour hot sauce down my mouth and then have tie dolla sign curbs on Where do you want to shave my head? I have one request though one request can a little kid do it? Can a little kid kill me?

Bet that what you guys are doing right, but you have to also admit that what you guys do Yeah, it must be very dangerous like how? fucking kill you. And you don't know about it? I could kill you with my fucking bare hands. Really good karate. I'm highly dangerous, so I could kill you with my bare fucking hands. It'd be really easy. So it's really dangerous for you.

I'll break your nose bone up into your brain. I'll hit you in your fucking solar plexus. Ever heard of it? I know every single pressure point on your body. I hit your temple? You're out. Solar plexus temple, you're out. That's a kill. That's a body. I eat your temple? You out. Swordflex's temple, you're out. I go palm, bottom of the nose, bone, straight through your fucking brain.

You're dead. You have a pedophile. So they come up, and then what do they also come with a group of guys? We don't care. No, but you could get hurt. But what if it's like me and my pedophile crew? We roll deep. I have a posse of pedophiles and like,

dude, you're lucky they weren't here today. Cause like, you know, we would have like, you know, killed you. I do not have a sucker crew. You think I roll with a bunch of suckers? I mean, I do, technically. Technically they are suckers, but like, listen guys, I roll deep.

On all 10 toes, I'm not even molesting kids. When me and my friends are molesting children, we roll deep. You were with a 13 year old girl that you... No, no, no. So do I. I know what I did was wrong. That I understand. He's like, you don't get it. I'm a pedophile and you're a good guy. He goes, you don't get it. You don't get it, man. Yes. But most guys do it and they don't care and they fight back or they do whatever, right? So you're the exception because you admit it? He goes, dude, my sunglasses are on the top of my fucking head. I'm dangerous, okay?

He goes, dude, if you guys heard about school shootings, aren't those things fucking horrible? One less kid! You're wrong and you suffer from any mental disabilities any physical disabilities I don't know if you're looking at me right now but I'm sharp as a tack do I suffer from any mental disabilities no he's like no no no nothing they're're like, really? Nothing at all, huh? No, no, no, yeah, no, he's he's he goes I have the greatest brain on earth.

So big it's spreading my head apart. I'm I'm so far from from regular simpletons. I've evolved. Physical, like what do you mean by physical? Well, do you have any part and disabilities whatsoever? I'm like I make you count like new nance because they what's new news. It involves like my I'm a retarded pedophile Of course, I have disabilities My new nance disabilities do this be one of fuck kids Are you guys like fucking dumb? I'm a neurodivergent pedophile.

Who knows intense karate? Boom, solar plexus temple. Boom, boom you're done. Boom, nose bone into your head. 12 to six elbow on your chest, heart stops beating. Press the point right here, you're done. Paralyzed. I've been judged because of my height.

A lot of people judge me because I'm a pedophile. Upset. Okay, but we're not going to judge you on your height. We're going to judge you because you have sex with children. That's okay. We're judging you because you have sex with children. Yeah, that's okay. No, no, we're judging you because you have sex with children. They're like, wait, do you think that you could have sex with children because you're the height of a child?

I don't know if you understand that's not how that works. He goes, oh, touche, touche, my man, touche. So you stop and, okay, you got me. No, actually, it's a great point. Like, my height is not an excuse to fuck kids. So actually, that's a really good point. Because I'm an adult and they're kids, actually, yeah. So you're smarter than me, then, too.

You guys are like really smart and what you guys do is an amazing thing. Once again though, you're just lucky I didn't come with my posse. Cause we're very dangerous. Once again, you are ruining my fucking day though. This is not fun for me. I am not having a good time here.

You know, you come to the Dollar Tree to fuck a child and you get like bombarded by you guys. Once again, dude, touche. You guys do a great thing. But some people, I stand up for them, because people who can't stand up for themselves. I try to do that too. Me and the Nudence boys.

I don't try to go. Damn. I know, I looked on YouTube, I was trying to find the video so hard. I hope it's one of the ones where they like smack the shit out of them and stuff. So I was on YouTube and I found out that like full, the YouTube page that posted it,

they'd nuked their entire page. Damn. So no one can find it. But I felt like it was just getting started, didn't it? It ain't right. I wanted a lot more of that. I know. It ain't right.

If anybody out there can find the rest, please send. Man, the fucking, the like, the highly skilled Jason Bourne Please send man the fucking The like the the highly skilled Jason Bourne like autistic pedophile. Oh, yeah the accountant pedophile Yeah, he beats the hunter up with like a book, you know in Morocco just flying through window to window beats him up with captain underpants Well, I Yeah, yeah, you guys think I like this one a lot That's fun. Yeah. I love you all I love you more. I think I love you more than I don't know about that man. What?

I've been thinking about you a lot. Come on dude. Like on different levels than you think about me. Sexually? No not sexually but I do want to like hold you. Oh I've always wanted to hold you. I think about holding you a lot. So I think about that about you.

I want to kiss your beautiful little. You want to kiss me on the lips? No just your little cherub cheeks Well, I want your big you're in yours. You're fucking your Serpico beard. I look like Serpico You look kind of like Serpico. I look like Carl Urban or Serpico. Yeah Lot of people I get that all the time Carl Urban people say yo, you're Carl Urban. Yeah, the same beard Who's that Judge Dredd judge Dredd. Oh, yeah, it's really handsome tall You look like Carl Orban and the boys yeah, yeah, you're butchering exact a butcher. Yes butcher

How are you doing Johnny? How is life treating you fine? Busy shit busy. I'm busy shit. I'm busy shit. You just waking up, fucking throwing your head in ice water. Oh, you gotta do stuff. Running full sprint while you guys film me. You run. John, you run. He should do all those videos, but it's me.

It's but it's you. I would love to see it in John's routine. This would be an amazing clip of me clipping my toenails just going this. You're like, can I have that? And you eat it. I'm picking my teeth with it. Walk out of your office, shake the guard's hands.

Well, you don't live here, right? No, no, no, no, no. No, grade up. Patreon.com slash hatewatch podcast. Join it. Even if you don't wanna pay for all the extra stuff, which I highly recommend you do't want to pay for all the extra stuff, which I highly recommend you do. You could pay for the five and get

four extra episodes a month, or you could pay 20 and get 11. 11, yeah. 11 extra episodes a month, so it's up to you. We, I, I, I. Well, you also get the regular page, so it's 16. Total value of the $20 tier is like 16 episodes a month

Yeah, no, it's not 11. Oh, does he get the two? Oh, you're right my bad. Yeah But uh more stuffs coming in the pipe, but on the jock week there is some really tremendous episodes and I don't I don't believe in in Any I don't believe in promotion or lying really or a punk rock podcast I really will say that I will say that there is some really tremendous stuff on the jock we have so you there's a whole arsenal of shit there and it's our best stuff wait you know Johnny and I were bought we bought some new equipment we have some stuff hopefully planned some some random crap Johnny got

mobile equipment might not even be podcast stuff next to star links so we stuff hopefully planned, some random crap. Johnny got mobile pod equipment. Might not even be podcast stuff. We're connected to Starlink so we could pod in the mountains or in the desert. I'm talking also like kind of like vlogging shit, like maybe it's like a fucking, you know, us hanging out at a bar or a fucking, on the, going to a new town and we wander.

And this isn't gonna be a new tier, we're gonna add it to the existing tier so you guys get more stuff. It'll just be on the patreon also jock week Which many people think is way too mean because they're like what what the heck goof gone goof on what did I say goof? Innocent and angelic goof con is No, it's not like we watch Evelyn all the time and make fun of a complete. Let's check You gotta check on everyonelyn real quick actually. Let's see before we wrap this up. How's Ev?

You gotta check on Evelyn. You gotta. You just gotta. Just gotta. Evelyn. It's like Patty. Oh Evelyn. How are you my sweet girl?

She looks good. Whenever she's getting her. When was this 17 hours ago? Ha ha ha ha ha. Is that a horse back? Dad can you help me? Ha ha ha. So she's doing well. 17 hours ago I think she's actually maybe at the end of her rub because this one just says, God help me. She's done that a thousand times. She restarts with a God help me. Please help me God.

She looks like she kind of lives on like a lily pad. Yeah. She looks like a big angry, stressed out toad. Yeah, she eats flies. Yeah. She's a big toad. She's a big toad. Ha ha ha, Evelyn's a toad.

Evelyn's a damn toad. Well, not much in that video, Evelyn. Let's come on, make them a little better, make them tighter. Our tongue! How's your tongue? Half is red, half is white. They're fucking burning the shit out of her. Trudeau!

My scalp is... Her scalp is full of lumps now? Unit 412! And they're choking her and suffocating me. God hurry, stop them. We need to send her to hedonism too. Fucking, what is it, Unit 12? Unit 412.

Unit 412, go to Canada and find any apartment with Unit 412 and look for Evelyn and save her. Yeah. Jesus Christ. Trudeau's in blackface, just dumbing boys into her pants. They better be lying. They're a fricking ball of shit. blackface just dumb boys yeah look at my head there to be everywhere oh fuck Evelyn

this is not good Evelyn I want to tell you what they do to me if I'm gonna be a bitch let me go bring a girl to the ground I made a couch a bird my dad Sapping my belly button. Oh They never heard them sat that well cuz they forgot they go why don't we zap the belly button Using Kyle XY technology on me. It's a intern and like he finally pipes up at a big round till he goes guys. Sorry We've never zapped our belly button. And he goes like, what the fuck did you just say? What did you just say?

Who are you, what's your name? He goes, stand up kids. It's a money ball moment. He's in the garage. He goes, a lot of balls for a fucking intern, man. I like that. It's charisma. When I pointed you, you talk.

Go ahead. Zap into what? Sorry, I was just saying we should zap Evelyn's bellybutton. Goddamn. They're like, we've done the third leg. And they go, why the fuck have none of you idiots come up with that? How much do I pay you? That's leaking, like fluids coming out of my bellybutton.

But they're dirty pigs, you know what it's like? It's like an electrical zap right to my private area. My private is so deformed. Sir, nobody's ever zapped a belly button with electricity. Because my private's so deformed. Oh my god, Evelyn. You gotta take a walk, sweetheart. Take a walk, open the door door leave the apartment by the way

We're like the only pod that I know of in the world who's trying to call attention to what they're doing Oh, yeah, she's being zapped. She's being burned. Her son is being burned. No one I don't see anyone talking about Rogan nobody now this poor woman and silent. It's embarrassing to me actually Evelyn's been being she's been burned for years. Her pussy is completely deformed. I heard like. Eating everywhere from inside around the outside of it. Everything. And they stabbed my throat. I'm telling you she's the perfect organism. Truly the perfect organism. She could survive anything.

Yesterday, yesterday, she has, she changes shirts well. Organism mmm truly the perfect organism she could survive anything Yesterday yesterday she has she changes shirts. Well. They've launched me into the vacuum of space I survived every environment. They put me in They get me a liquid nitrogen I mean Canada's sick man. I'm fucking burning at this point. I'm begging to be frozen and broken It's a super soldier program. Oh this one. She's outside. I think I'm sitting outside. Oh, she's much better I'm like rambin building she looks adorable needs to go on little walks and have more sun natural lights go to walks Yeah, you can see your craters in her. She looks adorable here with her little outfit on. She looks like she kinda hangs out with like a,

like a talking dog or something. It is like a Mickey 17. Sailboat or something. Like she looks like very, she looks like she's in like a children's story here. And they just blasted me I think from a car, but there's a lot of men who hang out at this building too.

And I couldn't breathe, it's so scary. That breaks my heart actually. I don't know why that got me. What? That just made me sad the way she said that. Blasting her from a car? That they're blasting her from cars? Imagine doing a drive-by in that way. I got to the drive-by burning.

Blasting her. Just like a Sonic Ray from driving by. You're just driving Evelyn. Trust me, it encloses your throat by the way you can't breathe. You can't. Ew! It belongs in your gasp for air. Like when someone couldn't stop the screaming. Ha!

Okay, the blasting her from cars. I just can't wait to find out this is all performance art. I would love that. That'd be amazing. She'd be like, Andy Kaufman. Yeah, well you go to Groundlings at Evelyn's on stage. Who knows?

Well, God bless you all. Patreon.com slash HeyWatch Podcast. Good night. Good night, and also I saw something that I upload the episodes later and later. It literally comes out every Monday at 7 a.m. Pacific time. I have a theory about this.

It has been for a year or two, and before that it was eight, so I made it earlier. Aren't there some places that don't recognize the same daylight savings? I don't know. I believe there are, that was my, I think that's just the right. Yeah, other countries.

Right, so I think that was a retarded guy from a different country. It was just like it was just like retarded guy from another country And a little say that was like the episode Another country yeah that guy in a little jacket fat guy Yeah, I mean no I mean I could I guess I could start scheduling them for 4 a.m.. So people in New York I get it at 4 a.m. so people in New York would get it at 7 a.m. Well that black guy in Miami might get it. Right, I want that guy to run.

That's on his next clip. Listen to Haywatch. It's like 7 a.m. All right, anyway folks, love you. Bye bye bye.