Hate Watch with Devan Costa - Baby Alien

Episode Date: October 23, 2023

Hasan Minhaj lied about all his terrible stories, new sideshow named Baby Alien hits the scene, Kangaroo tries to drown dog and gets fought by owner https://www.patreon.com/HateWatchPodcast

It's good to be in something from the ground floor. I came too late for that. I know. But lately I'm getting the feeling that I came in at the end. The best is over. Many Americans, I think, feel that way. Yeah.

Sorry. Let me take you back. So, we are recording this Like a week early Because Some scheduling stuff Connor has a big comedy show I believe Right

Connor's going to Where is it North Carolina I'm sure we have fans there I'll be at the Raleigh Improv Yeah we're gonna become One of those shows

That just does dates Up top This will come out The day after I get back Let's do one of those Podcasts where we go I'll be in I'll be in Raleigh

I'll be I'll be in Wisconsin I'll be in Wisconsin, I'll be in Idaho. And then the podcast starts and they just go, so when's the show? Is this like biding time? Yeah, I gotta get out of here on a flight tomorrow. Most podcasts are them just waiting for the show to start. I will start plugging my shows. Plug the shows.

Have a little bunch of psycho show. It's not gonna do you any good yet I think pretty soon We're going to have your seats packed We know Vino Is going to be fucking Filled to the brim By the time we're finished

That's my dream Just sold out we know night after night Well we think Connor's You want to try and start a show here in LA But you don't want to really and start a show here in LA, but you don't want to really, because it's a dead city, and nobody exists here in the stand-up scene.

Everything's empty. And you've already had like two shows canceled, because nobody shows up. I've had like five shows canceled. Five shows canceled? You also do like six shows a week, though. No, I don't. I've seen you have like five shows a week. Yeah, that's a good week.

That's a good week, yeah. Four or five usually on average. I would say I average five shows a week. Yeah, that's a good week. That's a good week, yeah. Four or five usually on average. I would say I average about three a week. But if he runs a show, I don't know how many Hatewatch fans we have in L.A. Obviously not enough. If you're in L.A. and you would come to a show, DM me because it'll motivate me to start it. Yeah, it'll be fun to have our psychopaths at a local stand-up show. And then the people we tell.

I'll tell you to book a few people. Throw them to the wolves. Throw them to the tuggers, guys. There's a few people I'd love to see in front of the loyal tuggers. The tuggers. Can you imagine that, Joey? Just ours? Hey, Fahim Anwar, meet Matty Ratt.

Target, target, target. Fahim, that's a good one, though. Yeah, Fahim's good, but there's some others out there that would be a delight to watch. I wanted to run a show out here years and years. I don't even know them. I opened up space in my head. I have empty filing cabinets now in my brain because I threw out all these names. You deleted files. The names. I don't even know them. They're all, I opened up space in my head. The filers, I have empty filing cabinets now

in my brain because I threw out all these names. You deleted files. The names are gone. Yeah. I don't know who any, I don't care about anybody anymore. But there was,

there was, I forgot what I was going to say. Jesus Christ. You wanted to start a show. Yes, I wanted to start a show and once we got like close to it actually becoming a reality i realized

well who do i book after i book the only five people i like oh i'm already thinking i had no clue like how do you do this week after week like you have to keep putting on new people you think stink i have like i have like a week and a half worth of lineups that i'm like that that's it yeah past that i'll be scratching i think it'd be funny to keep putting up the same line every week. Every week. And the whole scene hates you. Yeah. But you're like, well, this is, I get to run it.

And it's the best show in LA. I have a... It's the best show in LA. Only the same five people get to do it every week. Yes, because you're not booking some fat lady in the city that pulls out tissues from her purse and goes, whoo-toot-a-loo! The whole show's ruined.

That is my favorite comic, though. I love her. She is great. She is great. Deb O'Neill. Yeah, sure. And then there's Patricia Hartman and Kelsey Klein. There's Haley Steinwell. Haley Steinwell. You could just make up comic names. Haley Steinwell killed it

last night. Oh, my God. You gotta go to her show. It's called The Eagle's Nest. Haley Steinwell runs the best show The Eagle's Nest. Harry Seymour runs the best show called Eagle's Nest. But occasionally Derpar Nogarali shows up and kills it, dude. He's about to get Daily Show. Yes.

Yeah. He does that whole bit about how he gave his family anthrax. It's a lie, though. But I love it. It really elaborates on a bigger issue. Who was the anthrax guy, by the way? Hassan. Hassan Minaj.

Has he been, did he respond to that controversy? Yeah, he was like, he basically said, like, well, I'm extrapolating on the truth. Like, every comedian does. And it's like, no. Yeah. Look, I understood. People were defending that at first. And they're like, look, every comedian, you know, embellishes.

And I'm like, not to that level. Yeah, that's crazy. To get applause for, like, look, every comedian embellishes. And I'm like, not to that level. Yeah, that's crazy. To get applause for being a good person. Yeah, he was putting slideshows up and showing evidence for a thing that never took place. It's one thing if you're being silly and you're implying, we all know this is an exaggeration. Much different if you're showing evidence. This event happened. You're naming names.

That's crazy. He gave a guy an informant's name. It was an ATF agent. And they got a hold of the ATF agent. The ATF agent was like, I was never stationed in Sacramento. This guy's completely made up. Then he had this even crazier lie. He told people he was funny.

Yes, that was insane. Does he have a podcast? Let's look it up. No, Nate does not have a podcast? Let's look it up Wow No no He does not have a podcast That's weird The one guy who does

Well you're not allowed to When you make Like money off of like Corp like you know Viacom or whatever Oh is he on Like a big show? Well he's

He was on the Daily Show Wasn't he the Daily Show guy? Oh shit And then he had a show On Netflix called Patriot Act Okay We could do a stupid podcast where he doesn't really talk about anything real.

Yeah, I mean, he... Podcasting doesn't really work for a guy like him, because it's really... He does a lot of hand stuff. You know? He's always karate chopping and doing, like, big... No, if you watched this on on mute, you would think he's rapping. Yes. He's the Kevin G of comedy.

Oh, Kevin G! Wow, a Mean Girls reference. Uh-huh. Love Mean Girls Kevin G of comedy. Yeah. I'm like, oh, Kevin G. Wow, a Mean Girls reference. That's great. Love Mean Girls. Love Mean Girls. Men don't understand how far they can get with women if they just give it up to Mean Girls. You go one of my favorite movies? It's probably Clueless.

I don't know. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Drowning in Pussy. You like Mean Girls? I do. And here's the thing You're acting like

You like it for puss You just like it I love it I think it's a brilliant movie I also love Clueless I haven't seen Clueless forever I did like Mean Girls a lot But still haven't seen that

In a really long time Yeah I saw Mean Girls Once in high school That's it? I remember it was good I've seen it way more I've seen it a few times I watch it literally

Every single night What are you guys talking about? Damn dude Save some pussy for us I watch it constantly I mean man Lindsay L are you guys talking about? Damn, dude. Save some pussy for us. I watch it constantly. I mean, man, Lindsay Lohan, when she had meat on her. Man, she had real redheads. She had meat on her.

She wasn't, like, stealing Arab kids and shit, like whatever she does now. I used to jerk off to her nip slip so fucking much. She had a nip slip. Oh, my God, dude. What the hell? Keep it off screen. Keep it off screen. She also was, like, flashing her cooter, getting out of the car.

No, no, I'm talking about, like, in her prime, she had a nip slip. She had a prime nip slip. Yeah, yeah, yeah. With those big naturals. Man. Look it up after the pod. Wow. When I was, like, 15, 16, whatever, I would jerk off to that, like, every night for the

longest time, man. I loved her so much. So sincere. I'm having nostalgia. It felt like you were at a funeral. Like they were laying to rest the nip slip. I was like

flowers of rose. I had like overwhelmingly powerful crushes on celebrities and all the kids. Yeah. Like crazy. Like to the point where it was like creepy. And my parents thought everything I was doing was very funny. I was so obsessed with Hilary Duff and still to this day, she's so hot. She got hotter.

She got better. Way hotter. She now has the craziest ass. She looks insane. Plastic surgery really worked out. That one scene of her. No, that's not plastic surgery. She got hotter She got better She got way hotter She now has the craziest ass She looks insane Plastic surgery really worked out That one scene of her No that's not plastic surgery She got surgery

No she does like squats A million times a day No no I'm talking Not her ass Not her face Her face looks pretty natural She got veneers when she was younger And that was like a well known thing

Yeah Didn't she do a nose thing? No so every girl Is getting lip fillers and bow ties She looks pretty natural I'm not saying it's bad I'm saying it's great She had a scene

Where she's in like How I Met Your Mother Or something for a second I'm not saying it's bad. I'm saying it's great. She had a scene where she's in How I Met Your Mother or something for a second. It's a reboot. She's in How I Met Your Father. And she just walks into this closet and it's fucking crazy, dude. She looks just so fucking good.

I turn to the cartoon wolf when I see her. I'm like, my tongue rolls out, my eyes are shooting like steam from my ears. Yeah. But as a kid,

I was like, weirdly, I bought a poster of the movie Cinderella Story. It was her and Chad Michael Murray. Contribute on it? No, I did not contribute it.

It's actually creepier. What I did is I, I cut out Chad Michael Murray's face and I took a photo of my face and I put it on it. Whoa. And then I put Connor, I scratched his name.

I put Connor McNutt's. Dude. Connor McNutt. And I just put it on my wall. Dude, I don't know. I was his name I put Connor McNutt as the only guy I could not and I just put it on my wall dude I don't know I was in like elementary school

maybe middle school that's like the king of comedy but for pussy but it's creepy that's creepy you know what I mean that's a very creepy

thing for me to do yeah if you like planned on killing her and the cops came to your house and found that that's the most incriminating piece

of evidence I've ever seen my parents were just like he's good at arts and crafts do you guys remember the fappening yeah of course. It's still my home page.

Are you kidding me? I was on a trip to Europe and I literally, the fappening like broke and like the Jennifer Lawrence things happened and I skipped my entire first day on my trip to Europe

to beat my dick. Are you kidding me? I'm dead serious. Just for Jennifer Lawrence? I stayed inside, yeah. There's something so taboo and hot about a celebrity leak. I think we need to think about that for a second. That's so insane.

I'm saying I get it. There's something so hot about a celebrity nude leak. It's hotter than any porn. I know. When the Vanessa Hudgens leaks came out when we were younger, I was like, oh my God, that's the hottest thing I've ever seen. I love it because they don't want it out there. They don't want it out there.

Their privacy's been affected you're on the public scale your tits are ours that's what i say anytime a leak happens your all ours You're like, this is the price you pay for fame. It's the Shang Tsung of news. It's Columbus Day, motherfuckers. Fame, fortune, but your pussy's mine. The last thing you thought you had. Oh, you think you live in a beautiful place with a gate and you have security. Oh, well, there's a couple sickos out there jacking off their cottage cheese cocks to your fucking pussy.

And you have nothing. You can't control it. Oh, man. I am white knuckling it today. I am trying so hard not to drink. Crack one open. No. You're good.

Keep going. This is nice. No, get out of here with that, John. That shit. Devin's got great energy right now. Let him go. Let him stay like this. He's going to pay Red Bull.

Should we watch a little of Assam Minaj? I mean, I forgot about this whole thing. Can we? What were the other lies he did? What else did he lie about? Well, the anthrax thing was the main thing. Yeah, that's insane. That's insane.

It's also, you can't embellish and also profit off of it. It's like you're profiting over oppression and how you're targeted for your race. Yeah. It's like, and now you're making more money because you lied about it. It's really gross. What if you did a Steve Renizzisi where he said he was in 9-11, but he was on the plane? He said he lived.

He's like, no, I barrel rolled out of the plane right before I hit the towers. He surfed it down like Kevin Lee. Yeah. We knew a comic named Kevin Lee. Really cool guy. He had this great joke. It was like a hit.

It was like that was his main hit. Yeah. Maybe just from us. Yeah, maybe we just, I don't know. No, he did the joke. That was his banger. That was his banger. And the whole joke was that he was in 9-11, but he surfed down.

He was like a stoner surfer guy. It was great. Great bit. He's like, people were jumping out the windows, but I just actually surfed down it. So stupid, but it's so silly and funny. Like the plane was going down. No, no. He was in the top of the tower.

He was in the top tower. But he surfed the wreckage down. Surfed down the wreckage. Like Cowabunga, dude. That's such a funny thing to think about. I know. Like he just surfed it and then like 10 feet off the ground

he just jumped and kind of jogged off. I gotta say, I don't remember liking, back to the tits, I don't remember liking Jennifer Lawrence's nudes as much. She had, these were fake. I thought they were wonderful. These were fake, I found out. No, they were real.

So what I'm about to say was fake, was there was a bunch of nudes where they included Snapchat subtitles, and she was begging for cum and all this dirty shit. And I thought that... That didn't happen? That didn't happen, and without that, I was like,

these nudes aren't as good to me. She's not begging for cum? That didn't happen. And without that, I was like, these nudes aren't as good to me. She's not begging for cum? I like the narrative behind it. Same, same. I get into that. Same. John, how many times did you jerk off that day in Europe? Dude.

I'm going to honestly say. Tormented by it. First of all, I'm Hasan Minhaj right now. I didn't miss the whole day. But I definitely delayed my day in Europe to jerk off. But like- You get somebody like banging on the door like, John, what are you doing? Yeah, they're like, what's going on in there?

And like- No, but I remember I literally like opened my phone. I don't know where I saw it. It was just, I see like the hottest picture of Jennifer Lawrence I've ever seen in my life. I'm like, what's happening right now? That's a weird one for you. I didn't think you'd like J-Law.

She's one of my queens. Really? She's hot notch. She doesn't think you'd like J-Law. She's one of my queens. Really? She's hot notch. She doesn't have enough flaws, I thought. No, I like really white-looking women. But she's not old. You're a Nazi. I know.

She's not old. She doesn't have a Jimmy Durante nose. She doesn't vaguely look like an 80s male rock star. So I didn't think you'd be into her. She doesn't look like a base. She's not producing milk. She's not producing milk. That's a big one. What were you just talking about?

How many times have you been beat up? Five or six times. I'm the only one that could forget what their train of thought was so far, or else it's starting to look rough. Listen, buddy. All right, Hasan Minhaj questioned. Critics are raising questions about Hasan Minhaj questioned Critics are raising questions about

Hasan Minhaj and whether he and other comedians should be more truthful with their materials Minhaj's act often includes experiences that he says he's faced as an Asian American and Muslim American That's why you can't make up the oppression

That's where it gets creepy You're making up that you were oppressed and yeah but the comedian making money off of the new yorker many of those stories either didn't happen to him or they were embellished so joining us now is claire malone she is a staff writer for the new yorker and actually spoke to him for this article so you're the one that brought these this to light for us and you know we've been talking about it kind of all morning long about, you know, what sort of... I'm not the only one who's like weirded out, but his last name is Minaj, like Nicki Minaj. And I keep thinking he's like Nicki Minaj's sister.

No one's thinking about that. No. It's weird. No. Bad view. We all got to start doing the thing where we just look at John and stare at him John, you're in my chair

Thanks for interrupting on that John This sucks No attention span It's the lead up to the story It's literally been like five seconds It's been 39 How about like How about mirage, like when you're in the desert and you fucking see water to the story. It's literally been like five seconds. It's been 30 minutes. Here's a fucking monologue. John wants 39 seconds.

How about Marauch like when you're in the desert and you fucking see water? You know what I'm talking about? You know what I'm talking about? Hey, how about monologue? Monologue. Hey, anybody?

That's fucking funny, right? Everybody's doing that. Anyways, next story. Next story. Fuck this. If I didn't say that, you guys would have nothing

to talk about now. We're listening to the story, letting it develop. This is when John does his whole podcasting. It's all on purpose. It's just about getting out as many words as possible, and then the teacher goes, great job.

Yeah. John writing an essay. It's an essay where the teacher goes, you need 10,000 words, and John just double spaces, keeps using and over and over again. Just copy and pasting. Don't shut down.

I'm shutting down. Don't close off. I'm shutting down. Don't close off. I'm shutting down, dude. Like, how much chest hair are you showing? Why are you doing this? I didn't mean to. I don't know. You look good.

I don't wear button downs that often. You look good is what you said? He looks good. He looks better. Okay, Devin's being nice now. Is this the same shirt you kept all your belongings in when you rode the rails? On my second bindle?

Is that your second bindle? Yeah. Kept a couple tangerines, a harmonica. No this so nice ralph warren yeah that's great podcast thanks to keep keep talking about the dimensions of the whatever dude what's the size are you tired yes i'm so tired i just just finished. Why are you tired? You didn't work today. I got like six hours of sleep. I went out last night. You are really a man about town now. Yeah, I'm always going out. Did you fuck last night?

What'd you do last night? No, I just went to... I actually... So my buddies broke up with his girlfriend, and I could tell it was bothering him, so I went out and hung out with him. And then I didn't like go crazy or anything but i just kind of like moseyed along but i went to this like uh uh yeah i just

went to a couple bars and then went home but i didn't end up going to bed till like two three in the morning but why didn't you sleep in you don't because i wake up and lift at like nine you're a sleepy bozo for the pod sleepy bozo izo. I'm not used to the pod on Monday. Let's just watch this. John makes me sick. John tried to ruin it. John makes me sick. When you're a comedian and it's social commentary, but bring everyone else up to speed.

Why is his work sort of under scrutiny now? Sure. Well, it's because he stinks. For people who don't know him, he was a correspondent on The Daily Show and then kind of got his own show called Patriot Act, which is part of this trend towards like, you know, infotainment. Right. It was called Patriot Act. It talked about social justice issues. And one of the reasons why I think this has become such a thing is that a lot of his stories were personal stories about things that are very hot button and political in America. Police entrapment

it is so funny no matter what you do like when there's a news story about you like just the my biggest fear is like this being me like even if it's not that big of a deal like he's not being charged with like rape or anything or accused of something like horror truly horrible but just the zoom ins of you on a red carpet and stuff like like all that. The idea of turning on the news and seeing you is a horrifying idea. Yeah, it is. Luckily, the news is like, who the fuck's watching TV, really? Most of the country. It's also, well, it's much more horrifying if you're somebody like

Osama Naj, who lives this like a fake life where they have to be viewed as like an upstanding citizen on TV, on the daily show and stuff. Yeah. Like, I think that, you know, if like, okay, hypothetical situation, there's a news story like this, it's Connor's face, you know,

Kane murder. Murder. Old man. They go, stand-up star Connor McNutt uncovered on a podcast he killed an old man named Kane

and there's a zoom on him like that I think probably everyone's gonna be going like who cares that's Connor we love him

but if you're like a hypocrite like a saw menagerie it's like fuck you your whole thing was like I'm like telling people the truth I'm being honest like I'm telling people the truth. I'm being honest.

I'm a pillar of honesty. And it's like, no, Conor's admitted to what he's done. You know what's also weird about this? It's a more digestible form of guilt for white people who like Hasan Minhaj. You know what I mean? Because he's this kind of model minority. He's good looking. He's well spoken.

It's just weird to me that he's going up there. It really reminds me... Am I making sense? Isn't he from Irvine? His parents are doctors? Yeah. It's much more digestible than watching a George Floyd video

or something. Hasan Minhaj going on a stage and being like, you know, the Patriot Act affected me. So do you think that's people's vote? I don't know what you're talking about. Hold on. You think that's the decision people have at home? They go, I'll either watch Hasan Minhaj or George Floyd's death? No, no, no, no, no.

But it's much more digestible. What do I want to jerk off to tonight? The guilt is much more digestible coming from Hasan Minhaj as a white liberal than coming from something as grounded and realistic as a point of view like police body cam video of a guy getting shot to death. You know what I mean? It's almost like this is a pressure. Hasan Minhaj is like a moral pressure valve for these people. Things like Hasan Minhaj. Oh, you mean like people are disappointed?

No, it's like it's more digestible for them to watch, have him explain his oppression to you, and you go yes, I understand this. This is more digestible to me than actually facing the actual oppression that I could, that might people like me commit every day. It's like back in the day when people would say, they'd sit down with their families and they'd say, what should we watch tonight? Eddie Murphy or Rodney King?

I kind of know what you mean I do too but it's way funnier By the way barely I know But it's way funnier to just be like no I'm completely lost I'm basically lost I think what John's saying is that when it's put Into this like purified

Bento box Smoothed out like yeah Very orderly form of an Indian guy up there talking about his oppression and his family's struggles with being Muslim. That's more palatable

than they don't want to watch. Actually learning about what's actually happening. I guess. It's between that or you watch Michael Brown get shot. No. That's, yeah.

Or actually, like, learning a little bit or, like, reading a book or something. You could just sit there and watch Hasan Minhaj. You can feel woke without actually having to deal with something sad. Yes. Sure. Sure, right.

Just to bail him out. Okay, yeah. Dude, John, fucking great point, dude. Thanks, brother. I don't really, uh, I thought there'd be, like, footage of him out. Okay, yeah. Dude, John, fucking great point, dude. Thanks, brother. I don't really... I thought there'd be footage of him talking about it, but... Were they not getting to that? I thought that lady met with him.

Oh, did she? I think they were saying that. Or maybe she broke the story. I don't know. Don't quote me. No, she talked to him. She talked to him. Yeah.

Little internet issue. Oh, God. Little internet issue. Hasan Maj God. Little internet issue. Hasan Maj killed Khashoggi. He's written a book about what it's like to be an immigrant in this country. He had an interesting quote. I'm going to quote his Twitter account here. He writes this.

Comedians, of course, have the right to make stuff up to tell a joke. You don't actually have a friend who said something funny. But this is totally different. It's oppression fantasy, and it delegitimizes real stuff via elite capture he says it's oppression porn and it gets leveraged by upwardly mobile immigrants to mostly advance their careers elite capture he's he's he's like he's taking all the the views and the focus off of actual things and putting it on him. Uh-huh.

Through his oppression porn. Right. Yeah. Okay. So he was admitting to the fact that he was doing that? Is that what you were saying? I think that's what that guy was saying. Oh, okay.

Oh, well, yeah. Maybe he's... But it could be better by... Oh, yeah. No, maybe... No, that was his tweet, right? So what is he saying by... Sort of a Jussie Smollett kind of thing.

I'm capitalizing on the oppression of my people by taking credit for something that didn't actually happen. But I know for a fact will be sensational and get me a lot of attention. Yeah, so now he's playing the game where you just admit to it. I hope. Yeah, he's admitting to the wrong thing. It was horrible.

Yeah, I mean, this thread is, I think, one of the more interesting things that's come out of the story people responding to it claire i think the thing that's true for probably a lot of we watch people like her it is great stand-up comedian she's great dude will you book her claire she's a killer headlining she's a killer people in america is that racism or discrimination is sort of insidious or subtle and uh what hassan was presenting as what happened to him was dramatic. Don't book up his name. Say, Hassan. Don't book up his name. I will be racist.

Stand-up storytelling. So in some ways it catches attention. Every story in my style is built around a seed of truth. What if like Matty Rad is like writing his tweets to people in America too? Well, how does this... Like when the anthrax fell on my firstborn baby, it was so erotic, so wild sensual so gentle so gentle rub the anthrax on my rosebud

here's a quote directly from Apu I mean I mean Hasan and the quote is thank you come again fuck that's not what it was actually god damn it fuck um Hasan Hasan Hasan that'd be funny if they sign off they're like yeah you lied Hasan thank lied, Hassan. Thank you. Come again. In addition to the fact that like when really sort of horrific things happen, it's sort of to people that actually happen to, it does take away from their actual experience. If you're making up data points. I mean, well, enough of you. Who cares?

You lied. You stink. Stand up. I really, they should not have had that lady break it. What a boring breakdown, Claire Malone. It's just so funny, the Hassan thing is so funny

because it's not like, oh no, that bit was made up? That was my favorite joke. Yeah, exactly, like who cares? I'm like,

I don't give a, yeah, it's like, nobody cares. He's up there doing PowerPoints for the last 10 years. He's on his back screaming, it's bread,

not non-bread. You know, it's bread, not non-bread. You know, it's annoying. Yeah, he stinks. Like, he's literally, like, he's crawling all over the stage. Yeah, yeah. Yelling about hummus. Yeah, he's a bad comic. Yeah.

He's a bad comic that had the lie about, like, you know, people, like, trying to kill him. I might sound like a psychopath right now, but I don't know. I just. Say it. No, it's not. No, now it sounds like it's going to be crazier than that. But it always bothers me whenever they identify as Asian also. That annoys me.

I don't understand. Bullshit. Some weird English bullshit. I'm like, you can't do both. That's really weird. Also, I've noticed that when I've... I'll be telling a story to woke people, and I'll be like... For example, I'll be like, oh, like the Asian lady at the Cecil Hotel water tower.

And they'll be like, Asian? Like, what do you mean? Is she fucking Indian? Is she Russian? I'm like, we all know what I'm talking about, you idiot. Yeah, slanty eyes. Now, you know what I'm talking about, playing Russian roulette. Yeah, he looks weird.

Now you know what I'm talking about. Playing Russian Rolex. He looks weird. We're making fun of Gutterwell. Yeah, that's a joke. I had somebody accuse me of something like weird, like retroactive, like somebody that is still living in the past.

Dude, we were at a bar last night. Hit it! You got it, buddy. We were at a bar last night. Hit it! You got it, buddy. We were at a bar last night, and my friend Joey's in town, Joey Dardano, and Joey was coughing really loud outside. It's outside.

We're outside. We're outside. He's just like, and sneezing. Yeah. And then he loudly goes, it's okay, I'm just sick. Pretty funny bit, you know?

And this lady walking by goes, don't say that out loud. What's wrong with you? And then Devin goes oh no don't worry about it. He just got back from Wuhan. Yeah. Fine. It was a fun harmless joke. Funny. That's very funny. That is the source of the coronavirus.

This dude loses his mind. Her boyfriend. He's just like what the fuck did you say? What's so funny about Wuhan? And I think I just kept going like, oh, I said that because that's where COVID came from. He's like being held back. She's like holding him back. He's like, let me at him. What's so funny about you, Wuhan?

Dude, it was so, it was so played. Like, I couldn't even believe this guy that was still on his mind to be upset by. Was he drunk? Four years later. No, dude. Oh, Jesus. He's like a pudgy, you know. He was just trying to be like a woke whatever.

It made no sense. I'm like, we literally, like if I said that five months in, yeah, I get it. It was like a little testy time. But even then, I was fucking everything. These fucking Chinese, they did this. But it's been confirmed. But it's been confirmed. It was the Wuhan lab.

What are you talking about? It was like an American lab. I'm not even saying the Chinese thought it. So Joey D'Arnaud was clearly not in Wuhan a day ago. Like, Devin is joking. Obviously. No, he goes, why would you say that? Like, try to pretend like there's Proud Boys hanging out in Echo Park and I'm like walking around.

How old was this guy? I don't know, dude. I was fucking toasted, dude. I was drunk. We were pretty drunk. Give me a shot. And, toasted, dude. I was drunk. We were pretty drunk. Give me a shot. And, um, no. But I just started, like, cackling.

Like, not even acknowledging this guy's existence. It's so funny seeing someone turn into a monkey. I couldn't even imagine how, the level of rage I'd be filled with if I was angry at Devin and he was a stranger. And I'm like, what's so funny about Wuhan? And then he was like, ah! Like, I would, it's the most infuriating. I almost felt bad for the guy. I know, I couldn't believe, I just kept,

I just kept, I kept acting like he didn't exist, and I kept, like, scream laughing and pointing. Like, yeah, he's in Wuhan! Ah! It's Columbus Day, motherfucker! But, dude, it was most, like, condescending thing to this guy. Because he was legitimately upset. He's like, ah, what?

And I'm like, take a seat, buddy. Come on, let's talk to us. And he was just losing his mind to the point where his girlfriend had to, like, push him into the bar. And he had to, like, go drink inside. Because he couldn't be around us anymore. Yeah, yeah. Was that 33 Taps? No.

No, it was some other bar. Yeah, then I went to the bathroom and I walked by and I was just kind of like smiling. It was a delectable experience. I just couldn't understand what he was even doing. It was delightful. I was genuinely confused

at what he was mad about. Such an antiquated woke thing to get upset at. Hey, we're done with that, buddy. We're done with that. Every time I think about COVID and the Wuhan thing... Devin also is so good at making pointed jokes, like mocking people. Even if the

words aren't that mean on paper, there's a tone to it where somebody who's got a fucking dirty Irish temper will just go like... I've done that to people too, but I know. Devin also, when he's passionate, he's like, he spits a little bit too. You know what I mean?

Yeah. Salivus is just flying out of his mouth. Some fucking guy already feels like a cuck around his girlfriend probably. Clay Posh will be the most punchable face when you are laughing like that. Oh, I know. I've never felt that way to you personally. I put myself in that guy's shoes. And I was like, I would. I think I'd beat the shit out of him. Sure. Yeah. That's why I do it. Hit me. Hit me. Oh, I know. I've never felt that way to you personally. I put myself in that guy's shoes. Sure. And I was like,

I would, I think I'd beat the shit out of you. Sure. Yeah. That's why I do it. Hit me. Hit me. I'll sue you.

Never been punched. That's the craziest thing about Devin. Hit me. Hit me. Devin's amazing. I'd love a new wardrobe. Yeah. Huh?

Take it to the cleaners. Take it to the cleaners, pal. Devin's blind in one eye because he's got a knife and he's got to bounce his head across concrete. He's like, this guy won, guys yeah we just we've

been walking around all day being like what's so funny about wuhan it's all we've been saying all day i couldn't believe it dude i just really this is so stupid but every time i think about like wuhan and covid and all that stuff and everyone was like it's the wet markets it's the bats and the wet markets and no one's like no it's the lab every time that argument was happening I would just have this visualization of a bat in a lab coat with beakers in his hands. It's developing. And he's just making COVID. Oh man.

Yeah, that was fascinating. I wish you guys were there. Now I'm pissed I didn't go. It sounds like me too. It's kind of crazy. Even when I'm not putting myself out there not trying to have one of those nights just passerbys trying to fight me. The closest I've ever seen you. I don't think I've ever seen you get in a confrontation either.

People constantly. The only time I was ever genuinely afraid of you getting your ass kicked was at Echo Park Rising. That was in the Throes. Oh, my God. If I wasn't there, I think he would have beat the living shit out of you. Yeah, he would have hit me. We were trying to cross through this beer garden because he's from here and he's all upset about Echo Park Rising. I get it. It's an annoying festival. They act like they own the city.

They're celebrating Echo Park. They come down here and they set up little shops where they sell some disgusting sundress. Reggie Watts is there. We were trying to cut through because this giant parking lot

it was like the text parking lot. We go we don't go all the way around So Devin tries to like barrel through this security guard. It's like a six-foot-five black dude. It was an NFL huge and He Devin just tries like going straight in and the guy just like stiff arms him and Devin's like I'm going through I turned into like Stan. I got all sassy. He was like, no, the fuck you're not. You got to buy a wristband. It's like a beer garden. And he was like, I own this city.

You didn't say that. But you were like, I'm from here, motherfucker. You're not from here. How dare you? He said this? He was saying all that stuff. He was blackout drunk, screaming the top of his lungs. Oh, no.

So out of his mind. And I had to jump in the middle. I was like, hey, guys, back it up. Please, please, please. This is insane. Devin, just walk away, walk away, walk away. And I turned to the guy and I'm literally looking up at him

and I go, I'm so sorry about my friend. He goes, I'll beat your ass too. Get the fuck away from me. And I was like, righto, sir. Yes, I'm on my way.

I feel bad about that. I wish I could apologize to him. Yeah. It's also funny because that guy was like probably for sure from LA. Yeah, I know. It was crazy.

And he's also annoyed at the festival. It's also funny because that guy was like probably for sure from LA. Yeah, I know. It was crazy. And he's also annoyed at the festival. It was a real like I hated all the white people taking over the neighborhood and I took it out of Big Black's. Didn't you call

the red line balancer Shaquille O'Neal one time? Oh, no. Yeah, because he was acting like a sheriff. And then I realized later that sounds kind of racist, but I said it because of the sheriff angle.

See, my wit knows no bounds. Sometimes I'm too witty. Everybody knows about Sheriff Shaquille. Too witty for my own good. Well, that guy was being a fucking prick. He was cutting people off. He saw me trip. I had like three drinks.

What did you say to him? I don't know. I don't remember. It was so funny. Yeah, I was just going off of him. Okay had like three drinks. What did you say to him? I don't know. I don't remember. I was just going off of him. Okay, Sheriff Shaq. You're like, you look like Shaquille O'Neal. Another black guy walks by. You're like, another Shaquille O'Neal.

Oh my gosh. It sounds fit with Shaquille O'Neal. I swear to God when I said that I wasn't thinking of the race. He happened to be black. Yeah. It was like, no, he was,

he happened to be black. Sometimes people just look like certain. It's so racist to tell anybody that's not white. They look like another person. Yeah. Meanwhile, I get, I get told constantly.

I look like people all the time. Yeah. I know. I ever get, you know, I've never once been like, Oh, so all white people look the same to you.

We do. Yeah, we all do. Sorry. Shit on us. We'll shit on you. Most people look like other people. I love shitting on people. It's great.

I love taking fat, stinky shits. Everyone looks different and it's funny to talk about. Yeah. You know? Let's do a shot. I feel like I'm somehow crazier without alcohol. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

You are. You're a bit kooky. Because you've got no excuse. Yeah. You're wacky. I'm somehow crazier without alcohol. Yeah. You are. You're a bit kooky. Because you've got no excuse. Yeah. You're wacky. I'm all wacky. I'm all pumped up on fucking vitamin B6 and pyridoxine and Sessful Flame. Are you going to drink?

How much of that have you drank? K-9. Oh, my God. Get it out of here. Get it out of here. I'm going to crack right now. Get it out of here. Well, you've got to level yourself out with some nice whiskey.

Why don't you mix the whiskey in there? Yeah, give me some of that. I'm done with this. I'm done with this game whiskey in there? Yeah, give me some of this. I grew weary. I knew it. I grew weary. I'm only gonna have a little to juice up. Okay, sure. Look at me, though.

Just the juice up. I'm sober, though. I'll have one. You better. I will. What else do you guys remember me being crazy in public? I have one. I have one.

It's another, I hate to do this to you, but who was the guy that was Michael Jordan's photographer? Oh, yeah, that was the workaholics guy. Yeah, but their black friend. I kept calling him Boris Dia. Because he looked like Boris Dia. So a black NBA player again. No, he's not even fully black.

Boris Diaz was German black. Mixed. Yeah, but so this guy was mixed. So it was spot on. Wow. Everybody heard it. Wow, dude, that's pathetic. Wow.

I can't believe you caved. Fuck, dude. What the hell? Did you guys have a like, a challenge? What's going on? I was shaking. No, we just, like, we were going too crazy the last few days. Like, all I said is I'm not drinking tonight, and this guy caved.

I was like, Monday through Friday, we gotta, like, stop, you know? Yeah. But then we had to record Monday, because Connor's gotta go fucking, you know, perform to mongoloids in North Carolina. Yeah. I really don't know what the demographic is in North Carolina. I have no clue what's going on. White.

Raleigh. Mongoloids. Oh, no clue what's going on. White. Raleigh. Mongols. Oh, no, I guess they have. They got some. Raleigh's, like, I think, the most mixed part of. Well, I would also imagine Chris's fan base is mostly Hispanic. Yeah. I wonder, are there Mexicans in North Carolina?

Mexicans in Atlanta were weird. Okay. What does that mean? Mexicans in the South. Oh, right. You go there, and it's like, what are they doing? Mexicans in the South. Oh, right. You go there and it's like, what are you doing here?

Get out of here. Get out of here? I'm like, don't open up that restaurant, you weirdos. On top of that, what are they doing here? Get out of here. I do always find it weird

when there's like a taqueria like in the South. Yeah, I'm like, what the, you don't, stop it. Like, come on, there's no desert here leave room for ribs and shit you know yeah next time i get in a fight with valerie i'm gonna pick up

the phone she's like who you calling i'm like i'm calling ice enough of you yeah what else i didn't i didn't do anything else too crazy that night with the workaholics well you did boris d out and then uh the workaholics guy came over. What's his actual name? Oh, fuck. I don't know. Blake Anderson. Yeah. Love that guy.

I don't mean it. It meant no ill will that night. You love him? He kept the game going. We thought it wasn't him. Well, so to be fair to you, our friend Jordan started the fight by... Blake Anderson was walking by, and Jordan Lopez was being sassy. He just called out his pants.

Blake Anderson was wearing some weird red velvet pants or something. And Jordan was just like, look at the fucking pants on this guy. And then Blake Anderson heard it. And he walks up to us and goes, what the fuck did you say? My pants? My pants? What's up? And then Devin, just seeing this guy being aggressive to his friends, was just like, just went in on him. Yeah.

And just started steamrolling him. And at some point during this confrontation, Devin goes, dude, you look like the workaholics guy. And he kept going along with it. Yeah, yeah. But then the whole night. It was him. Devin didn't know.

The whole night I haunted them. Oh, yeah. He tweeted about it. He tweeted about it the next day. He said he almost fought me. Yeah. Yeah. Then later that night, I think. He tweeted about it the next day. He tweeted about it the next day. He said he almost fought me. Yeah. Yeah. Then later that night, I think.

And you love this guy. I don't care either way. I don't know. And B-Ledger dies. I love him. I don't mean any ill will. I see him in the scene. I mean, he's on like podcasts and those people I know.

It's bizarre. I'd imagine I'd love that guy. The degree of separation there. I have no clue. I think he's very funny. But I think the worst part was that Boris Diaw did literally nothing. He was an innocent bystander. And

he was also a skateboarding guy. He had skateboarding clothes on and stuff. They kept trying to calm me down. Be like, hey dude, do you like skateboarding? No, no, no. Here's how it happened with skateboarding. You want this binky? You like these keys, buddy? No, the way skateboarding came up was no one brought it up at all,

but then Devin was just looking at this guy and he saw that he was wearing skateboarding stuff and the guy's trying to calm him down and Devin goes, dude, nobody cares that you're friends with Bucky Lasik, dude. And then it turns out he's Bucky Lasik's main photographer. Wow, everything I kept getting things right

but not knowing anything. Exactly. Yeah, you actually, you accidentally sound like the biggest fan of this friend group. Yeah,

I know. And I'm like, I don't love you guys. You think I want to be friends with you? So then the guy's like, oh, here's like something

like some, an olive branch. Like, oh, you skateboard. You had a Bucky Lasix that you must know. And then Devin goes,

no dude, I don't do anything like that. I think I said, I think, dude. I don't do anything like that. I think I said I don't play with toys. Yeah. That's a classic. That's a classic. That's infuriating.

Yeah, it's a really rude thing to say. Oh, my God. I was like, no, I don't play with toys. I'm an adult. It's shocking you've never been punched. I know. I've been punched so many times. I know.

It's crazy. God. What do you think it. I've been punched so many times. I know. It's crazy. What do you think it is with me? I don't know. You're slippery. Yeah, you're slippery. You're slippery. Also, I think you look very beat up a bull.

Yeah. So I think people are like, what a waste. I know I could beat his ass. I look like the retarded guy in Million Dollar Baby. Exactly. The heavyweight champion of the world! I'm just outside of Red Lion. I think your words cut. Shadow boxing.

They cut, too, and it makes people think for a second. I feel like if you were just calling them faggots, they would have punched you. Sure. Well, Cutter just nailed it, where Devin frames the situation in a way where he'll, the way that he's talking sets it up where if you punch him, you're crazy.

Yeah. Because he's not doing any physical threat whatsoever. Whereas somebody like Connor, just being from Tohongo, might at some point just be like, dude, what? Like what? Like kind of doing that a little bit. Well, you see a guy like Connor, you go like maybe this is more of a fight fight because of his arms and he's big and strong and stuff. And sexy. And sexy.

And fucking so hot. And imagine him oiled up and everything. But yeah, later that night, apparently, Mark said that these two white girls came up and were kind of being weirdly flirty with me, but I was so just not even on this earth that I was like, I'll attack anybody. You're like Danny Trejo in Heat

when he just starts shooting the security guards. I think they did something like they kind of tried to... You mean Wayne Groh? Huh? Wayne Groh. Is that his name in Heat? No, Wayne Groh is the white guy that shoots the security guards. I thought Danny Trejo. No, no, no. No, no, no. I'm gonna go kill myself. I'll see you guys later. I need to piss anyways. Already?

Brother, man, I'm fucking chugging. At the taco truck, these two white girls, and I think one of the they were trying to like flirt with me but also by cutting like they asked me if they could go first

or something and it was like I was like no and then we kind of got into it and she got like angry at me

and then they stormed off and Mark and I were just drunk and laughing and I go yeah go kill Kurt she looked like Courtney Love

yeah it's so funny how like I never picked up on, like, what flirting was whenever. No. Like, remember in school? We went to an all-boys school. But it's like, girls would steal your hat. Oh, we flirted with each other.

We flirt. We didn't have a fuck. I loved flirting at high school. But, like, girls would steal your hat. That was a big, did you ever have that? No, because I went to an all-boys school. Always? Not even in middle school?

No, no, yeah, no. In middle school, I was so fat. Girls would steal my hat, you know, and I'd get legitimately mad. Like, give me my fucking hat back! Fucking piece! And I'm like, in retrospect, I'm like, I could have gotten so much pussy. What was I doing? Yeah, I know. I had a lot of those too. I know.

You bitch! That's my favorite hat! I never had that chance. I never had that chance. I was the fat kid that was along for the ride. Sure. I'd be at the theater and all my friends would have girlfriends and I'd just be sitting there making them laugh and then imagining them fucking.

Cutting a hole in your pocket and jerking off the movie. Just talking to my Korean friend like, Arnold, did she jack you up? He's like, yeah. Then she wiped it on the seat next to me and I'd be like, shit! That's so hot!

Just face-planting into the seat like, oh, yeah. Oh, man. Well, my favorite celebrity. Oh, my God. Yeah, I don't know where this is fucking going. Baby Alien?

You guys know about Baby Alien? No, dude. I've seen him a little. I saw his sex tip. Baby Alien? Yeah, you watched it. Yeah, I don't know where this is fucking going. Baby Alien? You guys know about Baby Alien? No, dude. I've seen him a little. I saw his sex tip. Baby Alien? Yeah, you watched it. Yeah. Baby Alien, like, is, he's this guy.

He looks like you'd find him in DJ Khaled's toilet. And I guess he's like a viral TikTok guy, and he's, you know. He's the guy controlling DJ Khaled in his brain. Yes. Men in black. Men in black, yeah. And so I guess these porn stars reached out to him

and said that they would take his virginity because he went on a big tirade about how he never gets fucked because people go, like, look at me. There's no way he's a virgin. Who knows? Who knows? I think he was, or he claimed to be before this.

No way. All part of an elaborate scheme. He might have been lying, but that's what he was saying. That guy fucks. We'll see. That guy fucks? No, he doesn't fuck. What are you talking about? He's like James.

He was in Miami. He fucked finally on this show, and apparently he brought the heat. Connor and I watched a little bit of it before he... Me and Devin watched a full 50-minute porn before he got here. He's bringing it. We put it up on the big screen. We're just watching porn together. So, I mean, I don't know.

I just... This is, like, a new thing that I just found out about. It's kind of fascinating. I mean, look at him. Look at him. Baby alien. Yeah. How was that?

What just happened? Oh, it was good. It was, like, good. Good, good. Whoa. So, you just happened? Oh, it was good. It was like good, good, good. Whoa. So you just had your first baby? Slim, thick. I felt like frozen. I was like, let it go.

Let it go. So I let it all go. You did? Yeah. Ooh. That's let it go. Ladies, what do you guys rate Baby Alien today? Can I give you a thousand?

They said, what do you rate Baby Alien? What do you rate him? Oh, I was like, Jesus. They're being nice, they're saying, rate him a thousand. You want a thousand? Yeah, a thousand, right? A thousand, we can add some zeros on that, right? You enjoy. Yeah, li-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i- He looks like he stores his cum in his head.

Like a camel. Maybe that's why he's great for porn. Like it shrinks down after it comes. Yeah, he comes and it goes normal. He comes and he becomes a Samanah. Yeah, exactly. Yeah, this is like if you squished a sun. A sun got snapped on. Wow, yeah.

Man, that was good. Very good. Y'all like how the heart did. Y'all see it? And by the way, camels do. They have a hump full of water. But it doesn't shrink when they... No, I know.

Relax. I was in. Y'all sure? I'm positive. All right. I mean,. You got a shoe? I'm positive. I mean, yeah, you're smart. Yeah, yeah, I did. I did, too. You did.

You did. Baby Alien, were you nervous? They seem like they really like him. I thought that, too. They like actually generally. I think they're like, maybe Alien brought the fucking heat tonight. There seems to be some real affection. Yeah.

He fucked me for like 15 straight minutes. I mean, we watched it. He kind of threw it down. He was throwing it down. He was like... What was he doing again? He does the noises. He loves to make the noise of the ball hitting ass.

Oh, yeah. Remember that? Yep. What if I just do this for the next 30 minutes? I stare at you guys. Remember that noise? In porn? When the ball hits the ass?

JP Red Embarkable looped that. The weird thing about the beginning of the ass? JP Redenberger will loop that. The weird thing about the beginning of the video is you couldn't get hard, so the porn star had to start playing a recorder and... He popped out of a basket like a cobra? Oh, dude, you're fucked in this town.

No. Kidding, kidding. Your manager still listening? I hope. I don't think he's fucked in this town. No. Kidding. Kidding. Kidding. Your manager still listening? I hope. I don't think he's still listening at this

point. Get us his IP address. We'll block him from ever listening to anything. I know Valerie's dad's listening to this. Oh, hell yeah.

Shout out Valerie's dad. Yeah. I don't know if he is, but he told me he's listening. Hola, brother. Which is a terrifying

thing. Hola, brother. Hola. Horrified. Horr a terrifying probably likes it yeah he does probably likes it for like maybe some of the wrong reasons but how are you feeling in the moment like what like what happened well at first i was like i looked down and i thought what the fuck is that shit in my pants? Like, he didn't even know he had a cock until today. What's wrong with his arm, too? When you're a dwarf, do you have fucked up, like, why does he have, like, burn victim arm? Is she a dwarf? That might be a real burn.

He has dwarfism. Yeah, they probably pulled him out of Aleppo after a bunch of white phosphorus attacks. Aleppo. He was sold to the fan bus in a Yemen auction. He was executing women in Aleppo like five months ago. He was in one of those cages where they're lighting people on fire. He was in Aleppo. DJ Khaled pulled him out and then put him on the bang bus.

Nah, they copping. They're not going to pull up. They copping. And then when I seen him open the door, them like open the door i look he got nervous i was about to run out the bus because i was like hold on you can't run out the bus again they ain't let me they're pulling by my leg is this gonna be a new trend like the like handicap bang bus that'd be sick are they gonna start doing this now that'd be the most uh body positive thing i would. It would be great. I love that.

Fuck retards. John, relax. We've said that on this podcast a hundred times, but never in that context. That was mean. That guy's like over 90 IQ. I think he has...

His brain is so small. Just because he looks retarded Doesn't mean he actually is Look how big his brain looks What are you talking about? No bro That guy's an idiot His brain is cracking

Out of his skull Yeah look at the big brain On baby alien I mean No I don't think Being a You're now saying If you're a dwarf

You're just retarded No Wait oh He has dwarfism. Actually, you were saying that. Yeah, I guess I'm wrong. That's like watching a movie and Peter Dinklage is in it. You go, ha ha, fucking retard.

He just has a disability. He's not mentally handicapped. John sees a short bus. He's like, is Vern Troyer in there? Wait, man. How is Vern Troyer smarter than an average person? He's got the littlest head. What does that mean?

He has average intelligence. But his brain's tiny. They're still normal people. They still have normal brains. I think their brain's the same size. Vern Troyer had a normal head. No. He also had a sex tape.

He did. Yeah. They love it. Dwarves get it in. They love sex tapes First I was like Whoa Whoa

That's too much for me And then combining them together Whoa But then I said I'm gonna do my thing And I just I honestly think they like him Because they're like

He's got a way with words Like they think he's like a poet No he's like the smartest porn star They've ever talked gotta weigh with words. They think he's like a poet. No, he's like the smartest porn star Dave ever taught. He loves that. Well, they gave you a thousand. Well, I guess I did good there. What do you rate the ladies?

One of the girls just started throwing up. They broke the script. Like, I would give them like a thousand. All of them. He starts drinking from a big hamster bottle on the side of the fucking bed. He's like, let me eat this food pellet

real quick before I continue this interview. They're like, baby alien, go to bed. They pour a bunch of shredded paper on the ground.

Guys, I'd love to come out, but I gotta go home and let little baby out, or little alien out. He looks like he covers his shit with dirt. He looks like he takes shits like a cat. He's always drinking from a dish of milk. You know when your dog keeps doing that thing where it's pretending it's in the wild,

and it keeps kicking dirt over its shit, and you go, That's over now. What are you, stupid? Brad, you do not do that now. You don't do that now. Speaking of dogs, the kangaroo guy. A new psychopathic kangaroo just dropped. Dude, kangaroos are insane. Kangaroos scare the living fuck out of me.

Kangaroos are jacked and they'll fuck you up. Look at them, dude. This looks like a fake creature. They'll choke you out. I never realized, dude. This looks like a fake creature. They'll choke you out. I never realized that they look like fucking Debo from Friday. That's a thick body. I have this thing with animals. This is going to sound so stupid, but in my head I'm like, you're either a dog or a bird. Those are the two types of animal.

I had a friend who had the same opinion. I'm like, you're a dog or a bird. What is a bear? A bear is a dog. Yeah, a dog. They look like dogs. That's the two animals to me. When I see a you're dog or bird? What is a bear? A bear is a dog. Yeah, a dog. They look like dogs. It's like, that's the two animals to me. When I see a kangaroo, I go, what is that?

What about cats? Dog. Dog. Dog. What is it? Deer's dog. They're a lot like deer, though. No, they're fucking not.

No, they're marsupials, dude. They're like fucking rats. What about my lines? No, but they look like deer, but they're jumping around. That's a dog, too? No, I'm saying like the archetype. Four legs on four legs. Oh, right. Okay. That all falls in dog. Okay, got you. jumping around. That's a dog too? No, I'm saying like the archetype. Four legs on four legs. Oh, right.

Okay. That all falls in dog. Okay, got you. Got you. It's a gorilla bird. I dig what you're saying. I know, but like that's crazy. Yeah, still.

I can identify. I go, that's an animal that walks on its legs. Yeah, yeah. Okay, dog bird. Dog bird. Dog bird. And then I see this and I go, I don't know what that is. Komodo dragon.

Dog. All fours. It's all scaly and it has a beak. It's a dog. Yeah, it's just a dog that has different skin. Whatever. Not a perfect system. Let's move on.

I told you it was going to be dumb as hell. Yeah. That's how my brain works. And when I see kangaroos, I'm genuinely like, ah. I thought it was a brilliant word. I just see what you're saying. All right, let's watch this. I'm going to punch your fucking head in

Dude, they fucking fight kangaroos out there Yeah, they do Look at how fucking jacked, dude He looks like Logan Paul Look at that fucking vascular in the forearm I know, he's on arginine I'm gonna get a personal trainer and be like Make me look like this, it's just a kangaroo

That's the body I want They are so scary L-argonine. I'm going to get a personal trainer and be like, make me look like this. It's just a kangaroo. That's the body I want. They are so scary. No. Oh, shit. Did he get taken under? No, he dropped his phone. He's got it, bro.

Damn. Oh, shit, dog. Like sizing him up. Shit, dog. Like, you want some, Esa? Dude, it's satanic. Yeah, it's like biblical. It's like satanic, dude. It's like up. Shit, dog. Like, you want some, Essie? Dude, it's satanic. Yeah, it's like biblical. It's satanic, dude. It's like biblical.

It's like scary as shit. They are so fucking creepy. Being half submerged in water is ten times worse because you don't know how long it is. He looks like he's about to float out of the water. Yeah. And start screaming. I mean, I didn't even know they also punch.

Like, they kick, too. They'll kick the shit out of you. They kick and punch. Yeah, they balance on their tail. They're like UFC fighters. This looks like an A24 horror film. It really does. They also have very long claws on their feet.

When I first saw this, I was like, every time I see an up-close kangaroo video, like these fights, I'm like, that's fake. It looks like AI or something. John, what would you do? I would jump on him, get his neck, get his back, hold him under. I mean, honestly, recently I've been kind of like half-sparring my buddy at the gym, and he's like a striker, and I just basically just grab him. That's what I'm saying. Get in close, take his back. Grab him and throw him.

And then hold him underwater. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. Get behind him. Drown his ass. I'm going to fuck this kangaroo in the ass. Fuck his ass. Come. Come.

Yeah. I'm going to rape the kangaroo. Yeah. I could drown him if I stay in close. Absolutely not. Do you want to know why they're always holding these dogs? Yeah, why? It's always that.

Because the dingoes are their main predator. Oh, really? So they associate dogs with an enemy, like dingoes. So they grab them and they try to drown them. So that's why these Australian dogs are always getting drowned. I didn't know they drowned. It's crazy they know how to drown, though. I didn't even know that when I was threatening to drown.

Maybe not drown. Like, I don't know if they're holding it down the whole time, but, like, contain the situation. Well, the dingoes eat their babies. Because the dingoes will kill them, yeah. Yeah, so they just... Any dog, they're like, no, fuck you. You know. Yeah.

Taking you to the water. They're racist. They're baptizing them. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Kangaroo versus chimpanzee. What?

A chimp would kill... Chimp. But really? But kangaroos got claws and shit, and it's alsoe. What? A chimp would kill. Chimp. But really? But kangaroos got claws and shit, and it's also jacked. Well, kangaroos. Guys, men have trouble with kangaroos. Kangaroos faster. Do you know how tall a kangaroo is?

Yeah, but men can't take chimps either. A chimp would fuck every guy up. Yeah, I know. But a man is a good baseline, I think, for fighting animals. Yeah, but chimp versus kangaroo, it's by far chimp. Chimps are crazy fast. I mean, I agree with you. I'm not saying I disagree with you. They're way stronger, and they have very long teeth. Yeah, but chimp versus kangaroo, it's by far chimp. Chimps are crazy fangs. I mean, I agree with you. I'm not saying I disagree with you.

They're way stronger and they have very long teeth. Yeah, I'm not saying it's... I have to piss. I have to piss as well. God damn. Jesus. Bye, guys.

All right, see you guys. You stay, John. I'm waiting. Yeah, no, I'm waiting for you to get back. Welcome to the John zone, guys. Go off. How would you run the show right now? How would I run the show?

Jada, can we get? How would you run the show? What'd she talk about with two... Let's play the baby alien porn, buddy. Oh, you want me to literally look shit up? Run the show. Do what you would do. Catastrophic. What would you do here? Catastrophic.

You're gonna type in catastrophic Chinese industrial accidents? Fuck yeah, brother. That's all you do. Devin, will you pour me up on this? That's all I know. Oh, you... I got you, bud. Don't worry. Thanks, man. Is this the glass you want to use? Yeah.

You're simply typing in catastrophic failure into Reddit. Move! Reddit. Oh, sorry, bud. There you go. I'm trying to do

like 15 things at once and Devin's like... Pretty weak shot. You poured him. You know, it was a pretty weak backshot your boyfriend gave you last night.

You're like Rain Man. Joey's text made me laugh this morning. I was like, you can't make it. That was incredibly brutal. Yeah, hike it up your skirt so your boyfriend can fuck you in the ass. Let's do this month. Let's see. I don't know if we're allowed to watch this.

No, some of them are. We'll pick one. U.S. Marines prowler snap cable car. Oh, Tony Billenborg died. Enough of this, John. Really quick. Give a really crazy breakdown of Israel-Palestine. Say something really inflammatory. Oh, something really inflammatory?

Palestinians are literally orcs. Okay, don't do that. I didn't actually mean to. I'll break it down. But Israelis are fucking savages. Jesus. Yeah, they are. They're literal sub...

What the fuck, dude? Listen, Connor McNutt's my best friend. Do you even hear yourself? No, here's the bottom line. I'm going to cut with me. Listen, Connor McNutt's my best friend. Do you even hear yourself? No, here's the bottom line. Why did I ask this? I'm going to cut this out. No, stop. What, you want to get crazy?

No. Let's get crazy, dude. No, Israelis, Israelis. Do you have like a thoughtful response? A thoughtful one? It is disgusting the way the children of Holocaust survivors treat a obviously kind of a minority minority in their own country it's disgusting and but the problem is is what you have here is a culture clash between two people

and uh they both do war differently they both mourn differently they have different values and uh the thing about pal is, especially Hamas, Hamas are literally savages. Palestinians are not savages. Hamas would kill all of us right now. Okay. Usually. Yeah.

They seem bad. Yeah, they're bad guys. They seem pretty cool to me. You're poking a bear. I'm joking. I'm joking. I'm joking. If Hezbollah gets involved,

then it's just going to extrapolate. I literally don't give two fucks. I don't want to involve anyone. Every time this conversation comes up and people go, if Hezbollah gets involved, I just imagine Hezbollah gets involved, then it's just going to extrapolate. I literally don't give two fucks. I don't want to involve anyone. Every time this conversation comes up and people go, if Hezbollah gets involved, I just imagine Hezbollah. Yeah. Parachute his little ass in. I'm going to take a whiz.

Hezbollah. Hezbollah is like Lebanese, right? Yeah. They're my people. They're bad, though, too, right? Very bad. Yeah. More of a tabooly guy.

All right. Well, John just really derailed the show for a second. I tried to give him, like, a fun little out, and he just went into a racist tirade, and then he tried to show us, like, really shitty videos. He can't help himself. It's unbelievable with that guy. Is that body cam?

Is there a corner this week? No. No corner this week? No, but let's watch this and then... Well, this is something I found. It's interesting. It's like a cop influencer. I've seen this guy.

He's like a cop in Arizona and he really loves filming himself and he really gets into wisecracks. You could tell he wanted to do other things in his life. into like wise cracks and, and like, you know, he's, you could tell he like wanted to have, he wanted to do other things in his life. He's producing his own reality TV show. Basically.

I feel like this is illegal. Isn't, doesn't this feel kind of illegal? Yeah. I don't understand it. Like you shouldn't be allowed to make a show about your job. You're allowed to film stuff in public. And like,

then edit it and call it Fridays with Frank. And you're like an actual, like, like, like PCH guy. If your chief of police wanted to fire you for this, he probably could, but it's not illegal. It could be a conduct thing, but it's not a crime. And it sucks,

but not a crime. So your chief just goes, get in here, Johnson. And he goes, you're gay as hell on the internet. I saw your TikTok dances. You've got no swag. I want your GoPro and your road bike. Now.

I need your ring light on my desk by end of day. Because both of you pissed me off. Because that level of driving here with people that aren't playing your game of driving and seeing who can get in front of who is absolutely unacceptable. Let me see your driver's license. I don't have it on me. You don't have... Oh, so you're driving the way you are and you're suspended. I don't care where you're going.

There isn't a stipulation in Arizona state law that says I can drive in an overly aggressive manner while my license is suspended. He's kind of like the Joey Swole of cops. You know? Like, he's like this. He goes, he goes. He, like, watches a video of a guy, like, running a red light. He goes, this was absolutely despicable. Joey Swole's the guy who criticizes guys at the gym.

At the gym, yeah, yeah, yeah. Not wearing your seatbelt. So, I don't know what you expect from this traffic stop, but that level of driving is unacceptable. Do you have any ID so I know who you are? I love when they put the shitty music. Like it's a reality show about people eating ribs. Hello, sir.

Why were you driving like that? So this guy, John, is a cop. He films himself, and he gets really into it and makes jokes. How is that allowed? That's what we were just saying. Is he a sheriff? I think if he's a sheriff, they're way more autonomous

than regular police departments. Right, yeah, I think he is. So it's not illegal for anyone to do it, but a sheriff might be less likely to get fired by their... How come anyone can become a sheriff? I don't really understand that. It's like you're voted in. Dude, you can get deputized. I talked to a cop one time, and I was like, dude, if there's a mass shooting, could you deputize people? That's what Dan Bilzerian tried to do

at the Vegas shooting. Dan Bilzerian, he was like, yeah. He asked to be deputized, basically. That was incredible. Give me your gun. People's heads were getting blown off, and Bilzerian ran up to a cop and goes, give me your fucking gun.

To a cop, give me your gun. That's crazy. And he was going to storm the Paddock's Hotel. Yeah. I mean, if I had one wish, it was that the cop let him have the gun. And then he goes up and kills Paddock. Wouldn't that be incredible if Dan Blazerian saved the day, actually? He would have been huge.

Yeah. God, I would have been sick. Yeah, if Dan Blazerarian killed Stephen Paddock. God, that would have been fucking cool, dude. Because he's such a fuckboy. He's been criticized for very good reasons. But if he killed Paddock... It would have been great PR for him.

And everybody would have just been like, all right, that was sick. He diehards at the moment. His biggest haters would have been like, that was sick. He diehards the moment. His biggest haters would have been like, that was sick when you got paddock. I watched what you did.

No, I know. You also have a brake that functions in this vehicle, right? Yes, sir. So you didn't have to race in front of him and cut him off

and then hit your brakes. You could have simply just applied your brake and let him go by you, right? But you didn't. When cops do this thing where they talk to you like a child, it drives me fucking crazy.

Just give me the fucking ticket. I mean, it's not like a cuck, but I understand in this scenario, though, this guy is obviously being a fucking retard. All he's doing is calling this guy a fucking retard. And this is coming from the guy who has the most road rage on planet Earth. Well, that drives me nuts too, is calling this guy a fucking retard. Yeah. Yeah, but that was- And this is coming from the guy who has the most road rage on planet Earth.

Well, that drives me nuts too, though. I think cops do that to me. Yeah, but I hate when they do it for nuance, like anyone would do this. When they ask me, do you know how, like, do you know

why I pulled you over? What are we doing? What is this, a pop quiz, retard? You work for me. You tell me. That's what I say. My tax is fun you

you don't fucking also like add homework to the situation just give me the fucking ticket or not you're never supposed to answer that by the way cause they're trying

to trick you into incriminating yourself yeah exactly right so you always just go like no why you know I pulled you

over today go yeah I killed my wife you got me you got me yep there you go was it the drifter that I killed back in the 90s or You got me. You got me. Yep. There you go. Was it the drifter that I killed back in the 90s?

There's a pound of cocaine in my trunk. What's the statute of limitations on murder? Do you know I pulled you over and you're like, I've been looking over my shoulder for the last 20 years. I knew this day would come. At a criminal amount of speed, the speed limit here is 45, to get in front of him and then road rage him and slam on your brakes the second that you got in front of him. Is any of that incorrect?

Give him the ticket. I didn't slam on my brakes. He was back there flipping me off, moving on me. That's why I passed him. Okay. And then I moved back in and you're absolutely right. I slowed down. You slowed down?

Okay. He just opens fire on the guy. But you did. You cut in front of him and then you applied your brakes. I moved when I knew it was safe. I was way. I didn't cut anybody off. I didn't do anything aggressive. But you did. You cut in front of him, and then you applied your brakes. I moved when I knew it was safe. I was way. I didn't cut anybody off. I didn't do anything aggressive, but I did apply my brakes.

That maneuver by that truck in the background was. Pretty illegal. These neighborhoods in Phoenix and stuff, like, what is life out there? You know who I miss? What are they up to? You know who I miss, DC? The Tesla Road Ranger. I know.

He's in prison for a while. Yeah, a long time. They gave him, like. How long? Almost life, I think. No. I think they gave him, like. That was, like prison for a while. Yeah, a long time. They gave him, like, almost life, I think. No. I think they gave him, like, 12 years. Yeah, a lot of time. If it's 12, let's sort of go funny right now.

That is bullshit. 12 years for being the Tesla Road Ranger? His bail was, like, millions of dollars. Well, because it's based on the amount of damage that you've done, but I don't think it's right to put him in jail. Look at this. Look at this, sweetheart. Cher and Mike, one of the recent

attacks took place in this area. This is the 2 Freeway. Whenever I watch this, I always have the fantasy that he would run towards the reporter with a pipe and beat him to death. That he's there. The road manager is there. Defendant Nathaniel Rademach

has a pending case from January 2020 in Hollywood involving road rage and attacking another driver. Police say they found steroids and more than $30,000. Hell yeah, I didn't know that.

He was roided up. He's on the trend, dude. He had to be on the trend. He was roided up. Send him to Palestine. Driving his Tesla on steroids. They release him like a Tasmanian devil in Palestine. They parachute him across the fucking wall.

He jumps in with a steel pipe. They parachute him over the crowbar. It's like a Fast and the Furious, you know, when they have parachutes on the Tesla and he just floats down. Starts driving it like a maniac. Far at the time. The videos have gone viral.

A young man driving a Tesla on Sunday. He's on Roy's. That's so fucking funny. This is a throwback. We've already done this before, but man, I forgot he would park his car just park it in the freeway, get out and run at people with a pipe, and then get back in his car.

It's so upsetting because we could have so easily have seen this line. I know. It's right there. It's so close. Wallace was going on. We would leave here after and just be like god I hope we see him. Like Nightcrawler. He's on a radio. Stopping. Jumping out of his car. Here we go. My favorite is this one.

Woo! Get him run at. He looks like Zelensky throwing a Molotov cocktail. He looks like a random guy you kill in a video game. Yeah, he does. Drivers and swinging away at their vehicles following weeks of sightings,

violent encounters, and media coverage. He's planning ahead for this. He has that thing blocking his license plate. He has a mask on. Yeah, well, that's just what you do when you're on nearly fatal levels of steroids. Oh, God forbid a guy has a mask on. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Well, that's just what you do when you're on nearly fatal levels of steroids. Oh, God forbid a guy has a hobby, you know? It's a sick Tesla, though.

He's got a weapon from, like, Clue. Like, that's the other thing. It's like a steel pipe. It's crazy. And the L.A. County District Attorney's Office charged him Tuesday. The man is identified as 36-year-old Nathaniel Radimak,

charged with assault, criminal... 12 years. For him? I fucking nailed it, dude. 12 years. That's crazy, actually. The fucking... He'll be out in like five. He's gorgeous. Charged with assault, criminal threats, vandalism, and elder abuse. Elder abuse? Some are felony charges.

Oh, because a couple of them were them were old and he terrorized them. How are they driving? Probably pretty shitty. Maybe need a wake-up call. That's what I'm saying. Maybe you need to pull a candlestick out of your Tesla and give them the one-two. This isn't right.

12 years is actually excessive. I thought we could get away with stuff like this a little bit. Give them two years. Let's say we had a couple bad days out there. I didn't know we'd be sentenced to 12 years. I thought that'd be like, you know, you get like a fine, you know? A slap on the wrist. A slap on the wrist.

It's not fair. Disdemeanors. L.A. County D.A. George Gascon says, This reign of terror ends. Investigators say Radomak has a one-kick title. He's a one-man Hamas. Just terrorizing the east side of

LA. History spanning nearly two decades. He's walking like a badass, dude. A lot of people questioning why law enforcement, if they knew who he was, wasn't making his name public. And I think it's honestly... Look at this guy. You don't know this guy? Oh, who's that? He's just,

he's like Mr. Snitch on Twitter. He looks like a loser. Like, people send him videos and he goes, he goes, okay. He like tries to find them

and he like, you know, says everyone go find him. He called it. He's like, I'm about to finish this video. Just let me finish my, my son Bamarger

is about to beat the shit out of me. He does look like Phil. Oh, yeah. because the dude's like a ghost he has done this all across the country what turns on he tends to flee the state tiktoker oh he has wow with more than five million followers has been shining a spotlight on the story from his home base in florida several of the tips that I got with his name came from people outside of California I was concerned about obviously the behavior that I saw in that video and figure this is some bear snitch Bam Margera just comes up from behind with two drum cymbals just smacks his ears boxes his ears in he actually just looks like Bam RJ right now.

He does. Oh, man, poor Bam. He is probably going to escalate if they haven't already. Tizzy Ent told his followers on multiple platforms to reach out to him if they recognized the culprit but may have been too afraid to speak out. And within a couple days, I had three different people who all sent me nathaniel's name specifically and as soon as i saw kind of the background on him and stuff i

was pretty convinced that was the guy that they were looking for the tick tocker shared information with crime stoppers and law enforcement in southern california among the discoveries do you guys know tizzy aunt oh a dating site for cougars. Wait, what? Do you guys know Tizzy Ant? Oh, a dating site for cougars. He's a cub. Oh. You're gonna brush over that. Yeah, what did you just say? Oh, this is... Was he gay? No, he's a cub. He's a cub.

He's looking for cougars. He's a little cub. He wants to be in their cave. And cubs, in various pictures, KTLA found a private Instagram account for Nathaniel Rademach that boasts your mom's lover and talk to my crowbar. Oh my

God. Talk to my crowbar. Wow. What an unhinged Instagram thing. What a maniac. Your mom's lover. I love him. How many steroids was he doing? Four or five.

I don't know. Wow. Well, that guy kicked ass anyways. We all missed the Tesla road rage. Well, that guy's the coolest guy ever. Surely that's the most exciting thing that's going to happen on our channel for a long, long time. Do you guys know Tizzy Ant? No.

He's this rat. Oh, that guy? He's this rat. In my opinion, let people get away with it. I agree. Yeah, I bet with your past. They get away with it. They get away with it.

Dude, growing up, my friends would post on Facebook. They'd be like, speed check or DUI checkpoint at these crossroads. And everyone online would go post on Facebook. They'd be like, speed check or DUI checkpoint at these crossroads. And everyone online would go, snitch. Comment after comment, snitch, snitch. The only time it's like helpful. The only time it's good, yeah.

You're like, fucking snitch, dude. What a bitch. Yeah. Well, I don't know. I guess we could watch a couple of these. This is like the type of shit. Okay. Now, imagine how that makes.

Big news this week. Dylan Mulvaney has been crowned Woman of the Year by Attitude Magazine in the UK. Now, imagine how that makes the women feel. He just steps in a bear trap right now. Wow, dude. What a point. Very good, retard. Which is just as well because I don't care to give him the clout. What's funny

though is that he's exactly the kind of guy that will look at me and say that i'm virtue signaling when i post about stuff but like so many other accusations that they make they're really just projection because you a straight white cis male in america are concerned about women in the UK. That was your big gotcha here. Please, by all means, tell me how disappointed you are in the Attitude Magazine, the UK and Europe's best selling LGBTQ. Imagine being his

grandson and you find out, you're like, I respect him and I love he's teaching me how to play chess and he's such a good man that I follow and I respect him. And then you find out that he's to play chess, and he's such a good man that I follow, and I respect him. And then you find out that he's got this channel. You find out he locked up your hero. Yeah.

The Tesla Road, the coolest guy. That would be heartbreaking. But then just the fact that he's spending his time like this at all. Also, a guy that looks like this saying the word cis, it's like, how do you get to that point? How do you get to that level? You know? Become gay. Well, you're just chronically online.

Yeah. Yeah. I mean, Jesus. He has, he built glory holes. Yeah, he's a subcontractor for glory holes. They bring them into buildings, they're like, listen, bud, we need two electric boxes and one glory hole. He's a subcontractor for glory holes.

Are you a subscriber? Yeah, anyway, we get it. He's crazy. He's a subcontractor for glory holes. Are you a subscriber? Anyway, we get it. So no corner this week, I guess. No corner. I have a big thing for the Patreon, though, that I can't talk about on this. Can't talk about it on this. Excellent. Great advertisement.

Yeah. Nice. Nice tease. Yeah, I didn't mean to do it, but I just... If I was on the internet, you know what I would Let's go. Excellent. Great advertisement. Yeah. So. Nice. Nice tease. Yeah. I didn't mean to do it, but I just. If I was on the internet, you know what I would say to that? I would post a meme of a gif of Tom Hardy and Mad Max, and I'd go, that's bait. Very good. I love the internet.

Every day it blows my mind. Yeah. How did people. Tune into the Patreon. I don't want to give too much away, but Kane came back to life. We have a redemption match set up between me and Kane. Kane is now undead with a machete.

Connor's going to finish the job. He wants revenge. What were you going to say? How do people take the movie thing? What movie? The thing you were posting about on Instagram. Overwhelming positive response. We're going to start doing that?

Do people do the whole comment over it and then we'll start and stop? That sounds too complicated. That sounds impossible. What if we want to pause the movie and talk shit and then keep it going? Then they'd all have to time it out and all that. I will say that there might be a way for us to find an independent video host

and then link to it from Patreon. That's so complicated. Somebody said there's a possibility of doing that on Discord and putting the link on Patreon so then everyone would join us. Right, exactly. Something like that. Yeah, that's possible. I mean, I think for now we should just start it and we all watch a movie together. We tell people

where we take some pictures and then we tell people which movie it is. That's phase one. They have a few days to watch it and then the big reviews will be on Hollywood Hatewatch. Anyways, big Patreon thing coming up right now. Everybody join the Patreon. Patreon.com'll be very fun. Anyways, big Patreon thing coming up right now. All right. Everybody join the Patreon. Patreon.com

slash hatewatchpodcast. I can't. This is crazy. This is going to be wild. This is going to be crazy. Yeah. I want to keep doing this, but we have to get to the Patreon.

We got to go. We got to go. I'd love to do a couple more hours. You have a big work conference tonight, right? Yeah, but I'd rather pod. How big of a... What are you planning on doing there tonight? Well, I was hoping, I know John wants to come.

I love the Intercontinental. We're going to the Intercontinental. Do they have food? Oh, yeah. Sure, yeah. Yeah, definitely they have food. Interesting. And they have free drinks.

Oh, man. Damn it. Not really my thing. Well, free food, and it's going to be fully catered and quite fun. Fully catered? Fully catered. Like sides? How are we getting in there?

Open bar, fully catered. How the fuck? I'm going to take a hot shot. I'm going to take a hot shot. I've been to these things before with Joey. I understand Joey being able to get one person. If you get all of us in, I'm going to be like, Joey, you're the man. I think that I can.

I'll sneak in. Well, I'm pretty sure I can get us in with no sneak. But anyways, we'll talk about that later, too. What are you about to say, fucko? I was going to say, we'll roll you in. Yeah, I knew that was coming. I'll dribble you in. No.

How about you get sucked in by your fucking friends? Very good, very good, Very good. Get fucked in. Very good. Every podcast, every episode should just end with you and I going, fuck! We'll fucking kill you, you faggot! Alright, thank you for listening. Good night. Love you guys. Bye, guys.