Hate Watch with Devan Costa - Blow The Whistle
Episode Date: July 10, 2023Dragon Drink, people seeing shapeshifters on airplanes, Orca's getting revenge on humanity, whistleblowers, George Zimmerman's current life, dentist thinks he can say the n-word Get weekly bonus episo...des: https://www.patreon.com/HateWatchPodcast
Transcript
Discussion (0)
It's good to be in something from the ground floor.
I came too late for that.
I know.
But lately I'm getting the feeling
that I came in at the end.
The best is over.
Many Americans, I think, feel that way.
Okay.
Here we are.
Here we are. Another week.
Another week.
Joey, what is this? Do you want to do this right now?
Let's just unpackage this bad boy. Let John unbox this thing. Joey, what is this? Do you want to do this right now? Let's just unpackage this bad boy.
Let John unbox this thing first.
So what is this, John?
So we got a fan that is on a nuclear submarine
deep in the ocean.
An actual submarine, not the...
Nuclear sub that's like K-19,
the Widowmaker.
Yeah, I think it can go forever
because it has a nuclear reactor in it.
How does that work? And it also has nuclear weapons in it right so instead of running on gas
there's a nuclear reactor yeah it's like at least hundreds of years it could go without like
refueling it could just be underwater forever or something that's cool yeah this country kicks ass
okay uh but yeah he sent a care package and uh i haven't opened it up yet. From the sub? From the sub. God.
How does that work?
I don't know.
Oh, they shoot it out of a torpedo.
Right to the post office?
Yeah.
Okay, so it's...
We got some stuff from Japan.
Japanese.
It just says strong.
Oh, 9% alcohol.
Oh, yeah.
Kirin.
It's a Kirin.
It's a Kirin.
It's an orange-flavored Kirin.
It looks like it's...
Oh, it's like a Japanese seltzer or something?
It's their white clothes.
Yeah. Check that out. That's fucking sick. Yeah, let's looks like it's... It's like a Japanese seltzer or something. It's their white clothes. Yeah.
Check that out.
That's fucking sick.
Yeah, let's throw them in the fridge.
I'm going to crack mine open right now.
Look at that Japanese writing.
He sent...
What are these?
Candy cigarettes?
What the fuck are these?
Are these real cigs?
Whoa.
Devin, have yours.
I don't want to...
It's warm.
It's like warm.
Oh, let me taste it though.
It's fucking good.
Let's have a taste of mine.
It's probably full of radioactive shit. Oh, it's just like a really good hard seltzer. That's warm. It's like warm. Oh, let me taste it, though. It's fucking good. Let's have a taste of mine. It's probably full of radioactive shit.
Oh, it's just like a really good hard seltzer.
That's strong.
You could taste the liquor in that.
It's 9%.
Oh, we got more.
You don't have a taste?
Oh, I don't know.
Have a taste, dude.
So you can review it for the...
I'm disgusted by John.
Oh, shit.
That's pretty good.
It's pretty good.
It's pretty good.
For 9%, it's like amazing.
Okay.
Look at this.
This looks... Oh, it's like an incense burner, I think. That's pretty good. It's pretty good. There's a bunch of Japanese shit. For 9%, it's like amazing. Okay. Look at this. This looks...
Oh, it's like an incense burner, I think.
That's for opium.
For opium.
Yeah.
Oh.
That's green tea Kit Kats.
Green tea Kit Kats.
Oh, we got some little tiny Sapporos.
Those are...
What is that?
This is for your baby.
If you want to get your baby hammered.
Give your little baby a nice little... Sapporo to go.
Ooh, sake-flavored Kit Kats.
Whoa.
Holy cannoli.
Sake.
All right, then we got...
Never really been eating food, Billy.
This is what I've been waiting for.
I wish this tasted like sake.
This is the...
I'm desperately acting like I don't have all of this available to me one block from where I live.
Go on.
This is what I've been waiting for.
The USS Louisiana Challenge coin from the Navy.
Oh, shit.
Is this whiskey?
It looks like whiskey, man.
Habus you, Oruma.
By the way, I was kidding.
I don't have a lot of this.
Yeah, that kicks ass.
I've never seen a lot of this stuff.
It's pretty sick.
Chiefs, can I say, can I read this?
Yeah.
Yeah, you can read that.
He gave me like a, we can't say his name because it's secret.
Top secret.
Well, so I think the name of the sub is on this.
Yeah, you can say the name of the sub.
Yeah. How? You can say the name. You secret. I think the name of the sub is on this. You can say the name of the sub. How?
You just can't say his name.
Also, that's not the sub he's currently on.
Okay, so it's SSBN-743.
Welcome to Tokyo 2020.
Saved the best for last.
Japan Pride.
That's cool.
Is this like the Olympics?
Is this what they clean the bukkakis with?
See, the gays have really gentrified the word pride.
I thought that must have been for gay people in Japan.
No, this is them being proud of the massacre at Nanking.
Very good.
And so it looks like a Mexican thing.
It's Louisiana, so it's like a voodoo skull.
For Japanese cholos?
For Japanese cholos, yeah, for Japanese Juggalos.
Nice.
So we can't say the guy's name, but thank you, sir.
Thank you so much.
Thank you so much for your service.
All right, now put it back.
I'm going to take this home.
Let's all put it away.
This is not very entertaining.
Well, yeah, I'm going to fucking.
John's just obsessed with people sending him stuff.
Ooh, look at me.
I finally got a cool thing.
It is kind of fun to have people send stuff.
It is fun.
It is cool.
Send stuff, guys.
Is this, what is this, sake or beer?
John, it's little to go.
It's Sapporo to go.
Oh, it's a little tiny.
Yes.
But is it?
John, come on, bro.
Oh, it is a little beer.
Okay, get out of here.
Yeah, John's acting like he's never seen anything before.
You've never seen Sapporo?
No.
No, no.
Let's give John these plastic bags so he can shit and put his belongings on them when he
gets evicted.
Oh, yeah, dude.
How's that going?
John is suing his landlord.
I'm fucking him in the ass.
You wish.
I may be staying, like, I'm going to essentially squat in the house.
It's going to rock.
You can't do anything about it.
You know what's funny?
You're everything you hate.
What do you mean?
You hate people that use, use, use.
You're a pull-yourself-up-by-your-bootstraps type of guy.
Now you're squatting.
You're like a Haight-Ashbury fucking street person.
This guy deserves it.
He sucks ass.
He's the worst guy ever.
He's the worst.
But you are.
I can say now that you squat. I can go, my friend John squats. Well, no, it's not squatting.. And he, uh, so, but you are a week. I can say now that you squat,
I can go John,
my friend,
John squat.
Well,
no,
it's not squat.
I'm paying him rent,
but I'm just paying him far less than what he wants.
Ironic.
A man that can't actually squat is squatting.
Am I right?
I,
uh,
you squat to take shit.
You squat on wild.
Um,
the,
uh,
the,
uh,
uh,
what was I going to say?
You got me distracted.
Um,
Oh yeah. So I'm going to pay him far less than what he wants. And then essentially I'm going to say? You got me distracted. Oh, yeah.
So I'm going to pay him far less than what he wants.
And then essentially I'm going to just hold out because, you know, I have like a lawyer on my side.
And I knew it was bad when I moved into the house.
And I knew immediately I wanted to fuck this guy.
Can we talk about how it's tearing your life apart?
You're not taking responsibility for any of it.
John is losing.
He's losing friends by the day.
My roommates are all moving out.
Everyone's moving out. He's really alienated a lot of it. John is losing he's losing friends by the day. My roommates are all moving out. Everyone's moving out.
He's really alienated
a lot of people.
John will sit there
on the couch
after pioneering
this giant lawsuit
against his landlord
for just
a lot of legitimate problems.
Like there was
cockroaches
rats
there was a fire
that broke out.
And he was like
breaking
regulation safety stuff and being a pretty bad landlord.
Yeah, city of land.
But then so a lot of people just deal with it.
But John finds a lawyer and he's mounting the biggest lawsuit possible.
He's trying to take this guy for like hundreds of thousands of dollars.
And John's roommate, our other friend, former producer of this show, J-Lo, his name is on the lease.
And so he put
down like $7,000 or some massive
deposit. We all split it.
We all split it. He put it down
initially, but then we all split it.
So you each put down $2,500.
So never mind. Oh, no, no, no.
I thought he was still
fronting that.
Nobody could afford $7,000
except him initially. So that makes it a little bit better, but
still, his living situation,
like his home, where he goes to sleep at night,
his shelter. Still, at the end of the day,
John's acting like a Russian gypsy.
Right, and he still, and J-Lo
has to sit there and go, like, am I gonna have a
place to sleep tonight? No.
Because of your lawsuit.
And you're not compassionate. John just very proudly said,
no, no place to stay tonight.
Well, this is the thing.
It's like I...
This has been a year-long process.
And it's like, yeah, no, this isn't my fault.
The guy's retaliating against us, basically.
We would have new roommates moving in,
but he's saying no more new roommates.
So every time someone moves out,
the rent gets bigger and bigger.
So it's like this guy's just...
It's not my fault he's being a...
The landlord's being...
None of what I was doing should have ever affected me.
John saw an opportunity to be a litigious welfare baby.
Yes.
And he's taken it.
He thinks in a couple years he'll get like a settlement.
Hopefully.
From this Japanese slumlord.
I'm getting biased info from John because it's coming, all the info I hear is from John.
Yeah.
But I do have to say, from what i'm hearing legally it
does kind of sound like a slam dunk oh yeah now we hope yeah we have a year of the city of past
like if you have the city coming in and being like yeah this guy's not being a good landlord
for a year it's like uh yeah it's a slam dunk but ultimately it still comes down to like what will
the final payout be is it going to be worth it you've ruined many friendships your life is in shambles i hope you get paid in cole's cash
disney dollars i hope that's i hope your big payment is that you have a lifetime supply of
whatever you want at cole's no i i uh i think i'm gonna get him and uh you know hopefully jlo
hops on board and because that's the best thing he could do right now,
and it'll be good for both of us.
It's fun growing older, and you get to start having, like,
well, I got a lawyer.
Yeah, oh, God, yeah.
I'm suing.
I love saying it.
It's big boy pants.
It's time for the big boy pants for all of us.
We should all sue each other.
I would love that.
That'd be fun.
I'm going to sue the shit out of you, Devin.
Take you guys to court?
No, I'm suing you, dude.
I'm going to sue you, retard.
For what?
I already sued you last night.
For what?
Being a dipshit.
He's hurting my life.
My brain cells are dying by the day.
The guy said I have a pretty good case.
I have a lawyer that specializes.
Actually, this is kind of weird because this thing that I airdropped you could eventually end in a lawsuit.
What is this, Joey?
Yeah.
So I'll set this up real quick.
I love this.
So Devin found this ad for sheath underwear.
Devin, do you want to go ahead and say the code?
Yeah.
They're getting free.
What are you talking about?
So this ties into this.
This is an ad.
Okay.
So Devin found an ad.
And basically...
Hate Watch for 20%. We don't have them right now. I don't want to advertise. We did So Devin found an ad. And basically. Hate Watch for 20%.
We don't have them right now.
I don't want to like advertise.
We did.
We did them last week.
Sorry, sorry.
We don't have one for this week.
So we have this.
But so.
This is our Sheet's ad for this week.
Yeah.
Pretty much.
So basically John and I got jealous that Devin had an ad.
And we were like, oh, look at this big slip radio hot shot.
Yeah.
He's doing ads.
Fucking retard.
And he's wheeling and dealing.
So kind of as a goof,
I started emailing people just being like,
hey, we have this podcast
and trying to get John and I our own ad.
And one of the companies that we reached out to
was this company Dragon Drink,
which is like a Dagestani energy drink.
And they have been sponsoring a bunch of, like,
MMA fighters and shit.
Who owns it?
Well, Kamsa Chiamev
is, like, their flagship athlete.
I don't know who that is.
The fucking...
He's got a cleft palate.
He's got a cleft palate
and a Dagestani beard and shit.
But so anyways,
they find, like,
somehow after, like,
a bunch of back and forths,
they were like,
okay, yeah, we'll do it.
Like, we'll actually do it.
It was a pain in the ass. It was insane. So they ended like, okay, yeah, we'll do it. We'll actually do it. It was a pain in the ass.
It was insane.
They ended up sending us like $600 for three.
We have to do this on three episodes.
I swear to God.
One final thing
to set this up was
they want us to play this, which is their most
recent ad that they have on Instagram.
Then we asked them
to write us a custom
ad for a podcast
that two podcast hosts could read
together. Just because we thought it'd
be funny to see their broken English
ad. But so
play this, then we'll do it real fast and we'll get out of this.
I cleaned it up a little bit.
Alright.
Love him.
That was it?
Love him.
Yeah.
That's how these Dagestani people are so...
Do they only have like six seconds of like data to film?
It's like an Okia phone.
What was that on?
All right, let's just get this out of the way.
Are you host one or host two?
I'll be host one, sure.
Okay, let's just get this out of the way. Salt of the Earth. Are you host one or host two? I'll be host one, sure. Okay, let's go.
This is what Gamsat from Dragon Energy sent us to read.
They all sound like Gamsat.
So it's like host one and host two.
So I'm host one.
As-salamu alaykum, dear listeners.
Today we have a special treat for you.
An advertisement for Dragon Drink.
Salaam, my friends.
Dragon Drink is the powerful elixir from dagestan
endorsed by the mighty dagestani fighters let's dive into the blessings it brings dragon drink
is infused with caffeine b vitamins and taurine the ingredients that make you sore like an eagle
on the mountaintops let's explore their blessings one by one caffeine oh the blessings it brings it
awakens the spirit boosts focus and energy just like the call to prayer at dawn.
With Dragon Drink, you'll feel alive and ready to conquer the day.
B vitamins, my friends, are the blessings that nurture your body strength.
They're like the mountain breeze, revitalizing your cells, supporting your energy levels,
and keeping you resilient in the face of challenges.
And let's not forget about the wondrous taurine. It's the secret of the strong mountain men of the Caucasus.
It fortifies your inner warrior, enhances endurance, and unleashes your hidden strength.
With Dragon Drink, you'll be a force to be reckoned with.
Allahu Akbar, brothers and sisters.
Dragon Drink has been the source of energy and vitality for generations in the Caucasus.
First of all, that can't be true.
Sorry, I don't want to...
I think they're extrapolating.
Now it's time for America to experience the blessings of Dragon Drink and rise to new heights.
Indeed, my friends.
Let Dragon Drink be the beacon of strength that guides you on your path to greatness.
Embrace the blessings of the Caucasus and bring your spirits and let your spirits soar like an eagle in flight.
Don't interrupt our ad.
This sounds like Khalid Sheikh Mohammed doing an ad for jet fuel.
Don't say you're going to ruin our ad.
Fucking up our ad, dude.
So, my dear listeners, don't miss this opportunity.
Taste the power of Dragon Drink.
It's time to unlock your inner strength
and join the ranks of the mighty mountain men.
Inshallah. Energize your soul,
embrace the blessings, and let Dragon Drink
be your companion on the journey to greatness.
Oh, we don't have fucking outro music.
Well, it says do outro music.
And then it goes,
if they had music they sent us, I didn't see it.
And then it's just like a disclaimer.
Dragon Drink is an energy drink provided to provide boost of energy.
Please consume responsibly and follow all dietary guidelines.
Dragon Drink does not guarantee strength or transformations,
but it can certainly inspire you to unleash your inner power.
Thank you.
Thank you, Dagestan.
Did they pay you?
They paid me.
We're splitting it.
What'd they pay you? $600. We're splitting it What'd they pay you?
600 bucks
We have to do that for three episodes
Are you guys serious?
Yeah I'm 100% serious
It took a lot of work
It was like a lot of back and forth
We've never even
I mean
Should we say it?
I've never even tasted this stuff
You guys are now
They're gonna mail it to us
I know
We haven't even tasted this stuff yet
But they have sick flavors dude
They have one called Mecca Cola
It's their Coca-Cola
I'm dead serious
They have their own Coca-Cola Mecca Cola Yeah Look up Mecca Cola real quick Look called Mecca Cola. It's their Coca-Cola. They have their own Coca-Cola.
Mecca Cola.
Look up Mecca Cola real quick.
It's the best. These guys rock.
They're really nice.
I like how you guys are now
using the show to just make
side money with Dagestani.
It's how it...
Go to the images. I'll show you which one.
Type in Mecca Cola.
Go images because they have one.
Maybe Dragon...
Dragon's Mecca Cola.
Be different.
Yeah, maybe Dragon Drink is like a conglomerate or something.
I think...
Mecca Cola.
I thought that was one of their flavors.
They have a mojito flavor that looks kind of tough.
100 people surveyed in Pakistan, France, United Arab Emirates, Malaysia,ia or senegal maca cola uh yeah okay anyways cool so they're gonna send us uh dragon drink energy
i'm really looking forward to maca cola i'm looking forward to trying the mojito flavor
for some reason their mojitos have strawberries and then them all right or something whatever
well next week we'll do it with the drink let's not open the show with an ad well i mean we i thought that
was like a gag i thought you guys were gonna have like some hilarious thing there well it's kind of
funny that it's it's funny that it's a weird ad because they wrote it weird but also it's like
no we're like making a quick buck yeah yeah that's more than sheath paid me fucking really
what i don't do you want to bet about them? I don't care.
What did they pay just out of curiosity?
It was like $170.
What?
Per ep?
I don't know.
I don't think any of our... All of our fans live at homeless shelters and stuff.
No one's buying.
You know what they might buy?
They don't buy.
If we were selling diapers,
it would be like...
I'd be getting thousands.
But you know what they might buy is Dragon Drink.
Dragon Drink is really cool.
DragonEnergy.com, I believe.
And you could have it shipped here?
You could buy it on...
Yeah, you could buy it online.
Well, it's a bit hard because it is part of the Russian Federation,
so they have to deal with some extra shit.
No, they ship it out of South Africa.
Fuck off.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
The big where it's like...
It's made of diamonds and severed hands.
Oh, amazing.
Okay.
But yeah, so anyways, we'll get off this, but Dragon Energy, I think they just have
too much money right now.
Joey, be serious, though.
Was this because John was at a low point, and he was like, he really needed money, and
it was...
Yeah, it was a little bit like John was trying to hustle, and he started hitting up Dagestani
energy drink companies.
Well, we also...
I gotta put my shit out there.
Did you have to send them our numbers?
So they were like, okay.
Oh, yeah.
I wrote a slightly exaggerated email to them about our numbers.
I do a show called The Joe Rogan Experience.
No, I just said we get up to potentially.
I added all the Twitter and Instagram views together.
And I was like, oh, we get millions of views if you add all that
shit up.
Dragon Drink
folks. Check it out.
That was the most
bizarre intro to our podcast
ever. Even I had no clue
what was going on.
Alright so
you guys notice what's going on with the
flights lately this week
Oh the lizard lady?
A bunch of people are seeing things in the sky
They're on flights and they think the guy next to them
Is like a shapeshifter
Huh
I saw that one lady I didn't know there was more
I didn't see any of the videos
Well let's watch the lady so this is the lady
And apparently Carrot Top was on this flight too
Hell yeah
You should probably just apparently Carrot Top was on this flight, too. Hell yeah.
You should probably just let Carrot Top.
It was probably.
I'm telling you, I'm getting the f*** off.
And there's a reason why I'm getting the f*** off.
And everyone can either believe it or they cannot believe it.
I don't give two f***s.
But I am telling you right now that mother that mother back there is not real
that's the prop comic they go lady it's carrot top i love i love this little she gets like a
little like uh like she like gyrates right little, she gets like a little like,
she like gyrates right here.
Like she's like, it's like a really cool,
here, watch this.
Motherfucker.
That motherfucker back there is not real.
I love how everyone looks too.
It's great.
But like everyone was, people took this
and they showed a image of a guy in a green hoodie
that he had like kind of
weird alien like eyes what the the internet ran with it then that turned out to be fake
but then carrot top talked about it oh and where's carrot though where is he
there's oh my god holy shit yeah that's who she saw look at him what a fucking insane
all right hi everybody welcome back to a day in hell of flying so uh we were on the airplane from Look at him. What a fucking retard. It's insane. All right. Hi, everybody.
Welcome back to a day in hell of flying.
So we were on the airplane from Dallas to take off to Orlando, and some woman lost her marbles.
I mean, literally was like screaming at the top of her lungs like, fuck this.
Fuck this.
You guys are doomed.
Get me off this fucking plane.
She's like, the live entertainment in Vegas sucks.
She's saying weird things. We're off the plane. She's like, the live entertainment in Vegas sucks. She's saying weird things.
We're off the plane. She got
her wish. We're all, we're de-planed
off the plane and now we're waiting
in the lobby. The whole
entire flight is waiting in the lobby
because they're going to have to sweep the plane
to check to see if there's anything.
I don't know. They're sweeping.
I don't think they've sent the bomb unit in,
or they look like housekeepers.
Are you even allowed to say bomb
in the terminal of an airport?
Yeah, you know, if you're Carrot Top.
I thought that was like a big no-no.
That was like a meet the Flockers.
It wouldn't be the first time Carrot Top has said bomb.
Very good.
Right, folks?
Am I right?
Anyway, dragon energy, folks.
They're going to send the housekeepers on the plane
and just sweep up and make sure there's no
pretzel debris and then we can take
off to Orlando. But can you
believe that?
Of course he's going to Orlando.
I feel like Carrot Top, the only places he's ever been
are Vegas and Orlando.
Something about him. It's like only
he can only thrive in Orlando.
God. But yeah, so then
there was another crazy fuck on a flight.
These people on flights lately, they're acting like the orcas in the ocean lately.
I don't know if you guys have been, but I pay more attention to this because I got to
find nonsense clips all week so we could shit on everything.
But the last month, it's been nonstop sea animals like fucking with boats orcas yeah
or every day it's a new orca have you seen the seals are washing up on the beach oh yeah it's
crazy the orcas though are fucking out of this they're out of their minds lately i don't know
what is going on they all like they they all like told it's like planet of the apes like they all
told each other like we're fighting back. There was two orcas.
They swam by these kids in Australia.
The people were like, get out of there.
Luckily, they didn't do anything because orcas have morals.
They're fucking with a lot of boats.
Now, I think they've invaded the consciousness of drunk retards on flights too.
People keep trying to open doors on flights,
which is very scary.
I'm getting on a flight next week.
Mid-fly?
This guy gets tackled.
He's like, get me out of here!
Oh, my God.
I heard it was impossible to actually open it.
I heard it's impossible,
if that gives you any comfort,
but let's watch this.
While it's pressurized?
Yeah.
But you're not even supposed to,
I don't like any skirmishes.
No, neither do I.
Mid-air skirmishes
I mean there was that famous
WWF flight
where it was like the flight from hell
where Rick
Brock Lesnar
tackled somebody on a plane
on a private jet
everyone got
hammered and was doing drugs
and there was women and then they got in a big
fight and then like Ric Flair
and Brock Lesnar and everybody was there
and then they started like wrestling and the plane is like
you could, you know, you could
I think it was Kurt Angle versus Brock Lesnar
and the plane dropped when Brock
Lesnar tackled him? There was like turbulence
Yeah
It made it, it was very scary
because there's giant men wrestling
In the sky
It was a private jet where
Every single person on the plane was a
Steroid
Juice Bunky wrestler
Man, imagine being on a flight with Chris Benoit
He's a British dude so you can't really understand anything he says
He loses a tooth a day, but...
Look at this.
He goes, you're a shapeshifting lizard!
Seriously?
No, I'm kidding, but that's like, this is the new trend!
This is like, you wanted, John,
you did this with your obsession with UFOs
and aliens lately.
Everyone is hysteric now.
You've poisoned the world.
Because of these fucking whistleblowers, by the way.
I'm sick of these whistleblowers.
I gotta say, I'm a little sick of whistleblowers.
They're out for a buck.
They're out for fame. You took a job. of whistleblowers. They're out for a buck. They're out for fame.
You took a job.
You signed a contract.
No more blowing the whistle.
You fucking do what they tell you to do.
You knew what you were getting into.
You knew what you were getting into.
No more.
Everyone thinks it's hip and trendy to blow the whistle.
Yeah, yeah.
Julian Assange.
Everyone's blowing the whistle.
You know?
Fuck off.
Fucking just keep quiet.
It's too trendy now.
We had Snowden.
We had, who's the other one?
No, not Assange, but Snowden's the only...
Assange and...
Wait, Assange was a whistleblower.
Yeah, sure.
The MJ, Kobe of whistleblowers.
Enough of these LeBrons trying to nip at the heels.
Okay?
There's a new whistleblower every fucking day.
You took a job.
You signed a contract.
I don't care if you guys
are poisoning the water in the country.
You don't get to say.
You signed
a contract.
And if you blow the whistle,
it better be fucking good.
Like Snowden had really good
shit. He was like, hey,
this is proof, definitive
proof that we're all being spied on.
And then everybody accepted it. He went to the Guardian.
They confirmed it. Perfect release.
Everybody else is kind of just like,
hey, I'm blowing the whistle. I fucking
saw something fishy on radar once.
It's every day now. It's a new guy trying
to get famous being a whistleblower. It's like,
the head of Bud Light,
you know, he came out.
He said, we're watering down the beer.
We actually put a lot of water in the beer.
It's not that much alcohol.
It's the Columbine effect
where like,
those Columbine kids look so badass
doing that shooting
that they caused all these other shooters
to spawn off of them.
And then Snowden came out
and they're like making movies about him and he's fucking strippers and he's the king of Russia. Mm-hmm. Yeah. And then Snowden came out, and they're, like, making movies about him,
and he's fucking strippers,
and he's the king of Russia.
And now they're, like,
they're all like,
oh, dude, if I fuck...
Exactly.
My life, I sit at this desk,
and I have access to these documents.
If I do that,
I could be doing this.
I could be fucking strippers.
You can't trust anyone in this country.
Everyone wants the fame.
So these whistleblowers
are just out for fame.
I agree.
I've really had it.
Every day somebody tells me,
there's a whistleblower, and I go, fuck him.
Fuck him.
I can fucking do what you were told.
What has he got for us?
Enough.
Enough of this.
Do what you were told.
Okay?
You took a job, and you don't tell anybody.
I don't care if you found out that they're going to nuke America.
You fucking keep that to yourself, bub.
Follow the line.
Okay?
You let it happen.
You let it happen. You let it happen.
Follow orders.
The only whistleblower I respect is Too Short.
Am I right, bubs?
Very good.
Am I right?
Yes, Devin.
All right, back to this fucking...
Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa.
Yo.
Yo, yo, yo, yo, yo.
Yeah, he's losing it.
Yo. So... Yo. Yo! Yo, yo, yo, yo, yo, yo! Yeah, he's losing it. Yo!
Yo!
Yo!
You can't rush the cabin.
Who do you have to?
Well, he's running back.
I know, but I don't know.
Is he running the back of the plane?
If somebody's running the cabin...
That looks like the back of the plane
because everyone's facing forward.
Right.
But...
No, they're facing towards... He was running away towards the front away towards the front oh you're right yeah you can't rush the cabin
what the fuck is happening look at these bitches unless you're muslim that's okay if you're muslim
everyone's like i don't want to be called a racist let him rush the cabin he's got he wants
to see the cockpit it's the yeah he wants a goddamn tour that's what they're going on flight
give me a tour
of that cockpit.
That's what I would say
if I was arrested
for terrorism.
I'd be like,
I just thought I was,
I wanted a tour.
What's it like,
why do you have
a box cutter?
Why do you?
Why do you have
a box cutter?
I'd go,
I work at
the UPS.
Why were you
swinging it around?
Why were you swinging,
why were you yelling
you're gonna kill the pilot?
I'd go, uh, it's sick.
It's fucking cool.
Then I would show the people
that are interrogating me.
I'd go, look at this.
I'd go, get the hell out of here.
I'd go, isn't that sick?
They'd go, alright, get out.
Department of Homeland Security would be like, get out of here.
They'd open that box and get the hell out of here.
God, he's a rapscallion.
They'd go, get the hell out of here. God, he's a rapscallion. They go, get the hell out of here.
Yeah,
so I don't know.
I don't know.
I just,
there's a,
it's a weird thing
going on lately,
folks.
The orcas
and drunk people
on planes
keep seeing aliens
and the orcas
are attacking
and then you told me
that you think aliens
are in the water.
You and I
are both,
oh,
the aliens
are down there.
What?
Can you tell me about,
I'm so sick of aliens
I want to hear
about orcas though
yeah I want to see
orca videos
you want orcas
I want orcas
have you seen
the fucking
video on orcas
dude they hunt
shit by like
swimming underneath
it and then
flipping it over
yeah I know
that
flip over icebergs
and shit
I want to know
about the current
orca stuff
they're communicating
oh they're
fucking
no browns
on this one
well this is I mean this is a new one oh my god holy shit those orcas are after Orca stuff. They're communicating. Oh, they're fucking... No browns on this one?
Well, this is... I mean, this is a new one.
Oh, my God.
Holy shit.
Those orcas are after...
This is a new video.
Oh, they want blood, bro.
This isn't the one I was even talking about.
They keep trying to fuck up the...
Look at that fucking...
The udders.
Oh, my fucking God, dude.
What are they called?
The udders?
What is it called on the back of a boat?
The udder?
It's the propeller, my friend.
The propeller. I don't think... I think the propellers would fuck them up
The rudder
No no they can fucking hit it with their head
They'll take the beating
Oh yeah
I think propellers kill orcas
This is payback
Not on a boat that small
Look at those fucking peas
Oh my god What an absolute unit mate Am I right? Not on a boat that small. Yeah. Look at those fucking peas. Oh, my God.
What an absolute unit, mate.
Am I right?
What a heckin' good ocarino.
You know, it's crazy to think they're just giant dolphins.
Killer dolphins.
Yeah.
Everyone tells us they're actually like dolphins.
It's like air bud.
Dolphins are scary.
Will dolphins kill you?
They rape you.
No, they rape dolphins.
I'm pretty sure.
I'm almost positive.
I don't think dolphins are in like fucking,
I don't think dolphins are, you know,
they're not bashing your head into a fucking pinball machine.
They're not delivering you in a parking garage.
Yeah, okay, I don't think dolphins are in,
I don't think a dolphin started Thelma and Louise's run.
I'm almost positive dolphins are sexually assaulted people.
Maybe they rub their boner against the person.
Yeah, what do you call it?
If I rub my boner against you, you'd think I was a sexual assault.
They don't have boners.
Dolphins have boners.
They have terrifying pink cocks.
You're acting like they rape men.
Oh, enough.
Like they fuck men in the ass.
Look at these orcas.
Look at orcas.
Orcas attack.
Let's type in orcas attacking boats.
I bet it's like all last week.
Boats 2023.
Look at that.
That comes up.
2023.
Let's see.
Group of orcas attack and sink vessels off Iberian Peninsula.
Where's Iberia?
God, they make a new place every day in this goddamn world.
Iberia now?
Why?
What happened to Siberia?
I'm almost positive.
What about...
Yes!
What the hell happened to Liberia?
Right, folks?
God, Iberia now.
God, all they do is erase letters and they start a new place.
Have a little creativity, would you?
For Christ's sakes, make a new place. Have a little creativity, would you? For Christ's sakes, make a new word.
My new favorite bit of all time.
The worst comic ever.
Basically just Dorky Dad.
He's the Iberia comic.
The Iberia guy.
He comes out there and he goes,
folks, have anyone heard of Iberia?
It's like our old video where it goes, Rav4.
What about 1, 2, and 3?
Orcas is causing a lot of damage to boats off the Iberian Peninsula,
raising questions about why the orcas are doing it.
Stephanie Sy.
Wait, wait, wait.
Where's Iberia again?
What'd you say?
Off the coast of Spain.
Really?
The Iberian Peninsula, yeah.
Interesting. It's crazy thatia again? What'd you say? Off the coast of Spain. Really? The Iberian Peninsula, yeah. Interesting.
It's crazy that we're talking about these orcas
the way they talked about the bugs in Starship Troopers.
They're like, why are they doing this?
Yeah, these visitors have come.
But why now?
I don't know, dude.
The government starts going, hey, there's UFOs.
And all of a sudden, orcas are like, get us the fuck out of here.
Orcas want to be taken here. Orcas, like,
want to be taken in.
Orcas, like,
want to go to SeaWorld now
because they want to be away
from Yakub down there.
They might.
What?
Yakub?
Yeah, the great alien.
Apparently,
there's aliens in the ocean.
The government's
blowing the whistle
as they do.
Oh, God. I'm so glad. We had a big Yakub night and it's like one of my biggest, like god i'm so glad we had a big yacoub night and
it's like one of my biggest like i'm so happy you know about you i've been talking about yacoub all
over this goddamn country pal and has this report in the middle of the night last october
artur napoleon was sailing miles off the coast of port Portugal to deliver a boat to a client.
As a professional skipper and sail instructor, it's a journey he's taken many times before.
At 4 o'clock a.m., it was my turn to go to sleep.
So I went down, I started taking my nap, and 30 minutes later, boom.
He ran up to the deck to find the boat surrounded by a pod of orcas.
They mess around for five minutes, and then they went to another boat.
They mess around.
More far away from me.
They were horsing around.
They teepeed my boat.
But the pod returned, not once, but three times,
the visit spanning over several hours.
Here's the thing about orcas
I know they're like they're called
killer whales
they look fucking adorable to me bub
hey those things are cute
I would jump right in there with them
hey by the way who named the grizzly bear
huh exactly
what's so grizzly about that bear
I'm gonna throw it some Charmin.
We can both wipe our asses together.
Drink a Coca-Cola with that beauty, huh?
What the hell?
Killer whale?
More like a fucking adorable whale on my soda cup at the theme park.
I really, like, I see them and I're just they're imprinted in my brain as
chamu yeah so they're like adorable yeah yeah the plushy of them and even when they're like
trying to fuck with these these ships uh rudders I'm like but it's fucking they're so they look
like they were made by us like they look like they were designed by Nike. They have the fake big eyes. They do, yeah. They look like a Jordan brand whale.
They're the most beautiful,
I think, animal.
It literally looks like
designers at Nike were like,
make the eyes white,
no black body,
and then stamp a fucking
jump man logo
on the other side of it.
They look so cool and trendy.
I can't ever imagine
one of them hurting anybody.
I think these guys were doing something
to fucking egg them on.
I think, yeah.
I bet they were doing something weird.
Yeah, they were fucking...
Well, orcas are racist against humans.
Oh.
Well, I meant the humans
were doing something weird.
I don't know, man.
All these humans are just fucking
riding their boats
and these orcas come up
and they're bumping into them. Are they overfishing and now the orcas are hungry because they don't know, man. All these humans are just fucking riding their boats and these orcas come up and they're bumping into them.
Are they overfishing and now the orcas are hungry
because they don't have food so they have to
go after the boats?
I know that sperm whales used to attack boats after a while.
After whaling was getting crazy, sperm whales
started fighting.
Ben has been obsessed
with these things and I guess that's why they're on my mind.
But it's also not. I just keep seeing videos
of them.
I don't want to be obsessed with whales.
I'm sick of them. I don't really care about
anything besides human
but they're fucking, they're everywhere.
Every day. Every
week for the last month and a half.
New whale. New whale.
New whale just dropped.
Let me see this whale.
I just want to see.
After sunrise. I got really scared whale. I just want to see. After sunrise.
I got really scared until I realized, until I see the orcas and see their movements.
Here's the thing.
Here's the thing.
If I'm judging on a purely shallow level, I look at a guy like this.
I look at an orca.
Yeah.
I go, orcas look better. Who am I siding with? I go, I look at an orca I go orcas look
better
I side with the orca
listen take humanity out of it
take
having empathy
a soul if you will
just shallow level
I go
I want to see the orca interviewed that killed him
because one of you is an ancient
fish beast
that can jump out of the water
and swim at 80 miles per hour
the other one of you has a crinkled up
white polo shirt
and then there's another one of you
there's a beautiful orca
and then you got this guy
and I'm supposed to be like yeah it attacked guy, and then this guy got to kill it.
No, fuck this guy.
Fuck him.
Fuck him.
Fuck him.
And how gentle they were when I stopped the boat.
In the past three years.
See, I've yet to see an attack.
Everyone says they're killer whales. I've never seen one. Well, they kill the SeaWorld guys. I've yet to see an attack. Everyone says they're killer whales.
I've never seen one.
Well, they kill the SeaWorld guys.
Well, I'm waiting to see on this.
But that was like revenge.
Yeah, they have to have killed someone in the wild.
Humans love revenge.
Why do we get upset by that?
That's like the perfect story.
Also, that doesn't even count.
It's like if you're playing with a dangerous animal and you die in the process.
Yeah.
It's not the same thing as being attacked while you're minding your own business.
Yeah.
Look at those fucking beautiful
creatures. We should
capture them and make them depressed and make them
jump through hoops in SeaWorld
in San Diego.
God, look at those
beautiful things.
They should be in San Diego.
Where's the splash zone beautiful things they should be in San Diego narrow waterway that separates Spain and Morocco
and the meetings are where's the splash zone on that map managing to remove the rudder with C1 yeah they the rudder up all right let's go to another one because this is all over 2023
is the year of the orca okay dramatic video this is two weeks ago. This is the same thing. Hi, my name is Elise Fox. Shut up, bitch. Fucking kill you.
All right.
Kidding, YouTube.
What happened to your premium?
No, I just forgot to sign out of the old account or whatever.
Three boats sunk after apparent coordinated orca attacks.
They're coordinated.
Yeah, they're teaching other orcas.
It's literally Ocean's Eleven.
Damn.
This fucking orca
in 1958
was harpooned
off the coast
of Long Island.
The harpoon got, like,
cut free of the orca
and then the orca
chased the boat
trying to fucking
bring it down.
Yeah, because it was
probably trying to kill
that fag Hemingway.
What animal does that?
It's killing that fag Hemingway. That's what that? It's killing that fag Hemingway.
That's what it was doing. It was like,
shut up. Enough of your books about riding around
in an Italian ambulance, you fucking depressed
retard. Why don't you blow your head off?
Yeah, a lot of these are revenge.
Damn, this is badass.
Orcas
would be in B-movies now.
They would be like in a Mel Gibson movie where he
kills a bunch of people because they killed his family. In 1962, they would be like in a Mel Gibson movie where he, like, kills, like, a bunch of people
because they killed his family.
Yeah, in 1962, off Bellingham,
a male orca attacked a boat
towing a female orca with a rope
that had been live captured for an oceanarium.
So they captured a female orca.
It was giving out cries of distress,
and the male orca fucking followed the boat
and tried to take the boat down.
Like any man would do.
This is the coolest animal of all time. Orcas are like
characters in that movie
with Russell Crowe where he gets cut off
in traffic and he just decides
to kill everybody in the whole city.
They're really fat.
It's a place that was CGI with an orca.
Listen to this, John. Three orcas.
These are coordinated attacks by these animals.
Literal animals.
The killer whales that appear to be targeting boats in Europe,
attacking them, and even managing to sink three.
Our foreign correspondent, Dan Longman.
Damn, look at that fucking foreign correspondent.
Michael Strahan should rent his teeth out to SeaWorld
so an orca can jump through his gap.
An orca passes through his front teeth.
An orca's going to pass through my front tooth.
Good morning, Michael.
Well, we call them killer whales, even though for the most part they're pretty harmless.
But there have now been a series of orca attacks on boats in European waters.
And they seem to be learning this aggressive behavior from one whale in particular.
And her name is Gladys.
How do they know this?
Looks like Gladys Knight and the Pips.
...of one of the ocean's largest apex predators,
orca whales.
Damn.
Properly known as killer whales,
have scientists and sailors on high alert.
Banging on our boat.
Hell yeah. Hell yeah.
They may just be playing with us,
but for sure they're gonna damage the boat
That sound
They don't fuck around
Yeah they're not fucking around
They're like
What's that movie with
Who's the retard
The big buff retard
That's a wrestler
That's like a pretty decent actor
Todd Cena
No no the other guy
The Rock
Nope
New guy
Batista
Batista
Oh yeah
He's in that M. Night Shyamalan movie
Where he like shows up to a house in the woods and he's like
we're doomsdayers and we're gonna kill you.
Orcas are just
they're fucking doomsdayers.
They're about to build Killdozers.
Here's what's going on with orcas, folks.
They're Paul Schrader characters.
Every orca
right now is living
out First Reformed.
They know something we don't.
They're building little sea bombs, and they're going to mail them out.
I was at church the other day, and Orca walked in with a crown of thorns above its head,
and it blew itself up.
Orca's chugging Drano.
It said, I don't want to bring a kid into this world.
He goes, what are we going to do?
Global warming, war. I told that Orca, I go, you got bring a kid into this world. He goes, what are we going to do? Global warming, war.
I told that orca, I go, you got the right idea.
I get it.
Anyway.
First reform.
First reform, great movie.
In 2020, a series of increasingly aggressive encounters off the Iberian coast has left scores of boats damaged.
Three of them sunk to the ocean floor.
You're looking at the last moments this Swiss luxury sailboat sunk to the surface.
Whoa, that's a big fucking boat.
Yeah.
The vessel was battered by a pod of killer whales in the Strait of Gibraltar.
Triangle of Sadness should have had some orcas in it.
You guys see that movie?
I saw it with you.
Is that the new one?
We saw it together.
That's right, we saw it together.
The ship taking on heavy water, the crew called for help, an abandoned ship.
Marine scientists in spain studying
the phenomenon and now suggesting it could be a response to trauma a kind of killer whale revenge
for pain suffered from a collision with a boat scientists in spain say they don't like the orcas
because they're partially black more and more in one of our hypothesis studies that one orca suffered a traumatic event, a female orca, and she only wanted to stop this boat.
And right now, this behavior is spreading.
Researchers have named that female...
It's funny when somebody can't speak perfect English, and so you just go, stop trying to be cute.
What are you, flirting with me? Are you flirting? English and so you just go stop trying to be cute.
What are you flirting with me?
I go are you flirting?
And they go no I just cannot speak.
I have a language barrier.
I go oh my god you're a whore.
You trying to make me horny bitch?
I go what are you trying to get me on?
They go no I just have a trouble with the language of your country.
I go oh my god enough of you.
Let me come on your face.
Why are you on the phone?
I'm looking up orca attacks. What are you doing?
I have a computer here.
So you're just reading independently while we do
a show, you dumb fuck?
I can bring it up. I don't know. There's crazy orca
attacks happening.
It's exciting.
Go find the orca attacks.
We're looking at a video right now.
There's way cooler ones that happened in like 1958.
Devin has good orca shit right now.
Well, unfortunately, we don't have I Love Lucy footage of orcas.
Okay?
Gladys Blanca.
Jesus.
Unbelievable.
He's a rookie.
Trying to learn.
He doesn't understand podcasts.
Trying to learn, you know.
Hey, listen, go.
Put your fucking phone away.
I'm putting it away.
I was doing the orcas.
Right.
I'm into orca attacks now.
Progressive behavior.
I'm an orca guy.
The critically endangered regional subpopulation numbers fewer than 40 whales, but they pose
a significant danger to ocean life.
I mean, this is such a big deal.
It was on ABC three weeks ago, apparently.
I didn't even know this.
This is, I didn't even, when I, you know, I brought, I bring up everything like it's a fact
and it's happening.
I had no clue I was right
about Orca's taking over the world.
You just had a hunch.
I had a hunch.
Had a bit of a hunch.
We type it in, three weeks ago.
Wow.
Fucking, fucking unbelievable.
Barbara Walters is interviewing an Orca right now.
And he's got a fucking turban on.
Get your news here, folks.
Right here at the Haywatch Pod.
He was forced to hold out for over an hour as the whales targeted his boat.
Hold out.
The noises that were making the boat twisting the power that these creatures possessed is
just incredible.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Right.
Of course.
At this older orca in calf.
They're bigger than you.
They have more power than you.
The boat limping back to port with a heavy duty hull chains completely snapped. They're bigger than you They have more power than you Some dumb fucking human
That's the last time you buy chains from Japan
What is a skipper?
I just thought that was like a fun name to call people
Isn't it the second guy under the captain?
What does that mean?
He just goes
There's an iceberg ahead, sir.
What does a skipper do?
I think John might be right.
I think it's like a rank under a captain.
Yeah.
Right.
I think.
So it's like the captain's secretary.
Maybe.
I don't know.
Yeah, it's like the first man or whatever, you know, where they have to be in charge
of like, hey, I'm doing all the real captain shit, but you got to run around and make sure
that like nobody's fucking up crazily.
I think. Alright, okay.
I never imagined a guy this big
to be a skipper.
They're supposed to be a little gay.
They're supposed to be little twinks.
You want to be a cat. I don't like how big he is.
Everyone underneath
the captain should just get smaller and smaller
and smaller. You can tell he's
upset by the strength of the orcas, too.
Yeah. He's like, you see one of these things,
you just want to hit Gold's gym, you know?
You want to take it down, you know? She's insane.
It's quite unnerving as a sailor to see the next
generation now is learning. Yeah, so stop
going out there. We can stop
eating tuna. It's okay.
What happened to sailors, dude?
This guy's a massive pussy.
...mortaring whale activity before they set sail
in order to avoid these encounters.
All right, new orca video.
I didn't know we were going to do an orca-centric episode,
but I'm into it.
Okay.
This is seven years ago, but this guy,
this orca probably died
and then told all the rest of the orcas,
you fucking fight for me.
He probably had a movie moment.
The orcas are like...
A Braveheart speech. And all the other orcas you fucking fight for me yeah i probably had a movie moment the orcas are a braveheart speech yeah and all the other orcas crowded around and he goes get those
motherfuckers and they they've been fighting back for years and the 2023 yeah the orca probably said
the orca was dying it was like you better cry macho
The orca was dying.
It was like, you better cry, macho.
You better be macho.
You better get those fucking round eyes.
Orcas call us round eyes.
Well, orcas are... Orcas seem Asian.
They seem Japanese or something.
Mongolian or something. They're big and tough. Yeah, they're for sure Asian. Mongolian or something.
They're big and tough.
You know orcas kill themselves if they fail.
Yeah.
Look at that.
That thing's so fucking big.
Jesus fuck.
Oh, God.
I was in a boat that was chased by a pack of orcas.
I was fucking salmon fishing one time. It was crazy. San Diego. I didn't know orcas were in the distance. I was in a boat that was chased by a pack of orcas when I was fucking salmon fishing one time.
It was crazy. San Diego.
I didn't know orcas were in San Diego. They're everywhere.
They're in every ocean. Hell yeah. They're like
global fish. I thought they were only in San Diego
when we captured them and
took them to SeaWorld.
I didn't know they were just in San Diego. That's awesome.
Which, by the way, San Diego
means a whale's vagina.
Am I right?
Yes, yes.
What if I start, what if I find out I have, like, a brain worm,
and I slowly am dying throughout, like, the episodes of this show,
and I turn into one of those guys that can only quote, like, Anchorman.
We take you to the doctor, and he's like, what are the symptoms?
They're like, well, he's a hack.
He keeps doing Anchorman.
I go, what are the symptoms?
He goes, he's a bit of a hack. He used to be really funny. I go, well, he's a hack. He keeps doing anchoring. I go, what are the symptoms? He goes, he's a bit of a hack.
He used to be really funny.
I go, like, it's Wolfpack.
I keep doing, like, hangover quotes, and I'm like, I have many leather-bound books in my,
that smell of rich mahogany.
You guys are like, we think he's dying.
And then the doctor goes, yeah, he actually, you guys are right.
What were the symptoms?
He goes, he was just a bit of a hack.
He was quoting a lot of movies from the mid-2000s the movies get worse
and worse as you degrade so the final step is like borat you're just sitting there it's like
my final night in the hospital you guys visit me and i'm just like you guys are like devon we love
you it's like we we'll always love you it's okay and i go my wife and then you look at the doctor you go you could just
unplug them just just just pull the plug just smothering enough of this just one of those
ever i mean we all knew tons of people whose whole personality was like wedding crashers
hangover anchorman borat i still have a lot of brothers i have a lot of friends still who that's
like you know.
Yeah.
Will Ferrell was like a cheat code to being like somewhat humorous in high school.
You know what I mean?
Yeah, well, he was.
He was.
It's fun to quote movies and stuff, but when you get to know somebody, it's like, oh, that's the only thing they do.
It gets a bit old.
It gets a bit old.
Yeah, it gets a bit old.
The guys didn't realize it was actually killer whales chasing their boat, seen in this video by Viral Hog.
That other, right under us, still.
Right there.
They write that there was a pod of 30 orcas
swimming and following their boat,
and they were jumping in the boat's wake,
some even getting a little too close for comfort.
Jesus fucking Christ, dude.
There was even stunning video of the whales under the water swimming alongside their boat.
All right.
Oh, what is that, red?
Yeah, they put a red filter to make it scary.
Oh, well, that's annoying.
You bought that?
You're like, oh, that's real?
I thought it was all blood.
Yeah, it's like real life, like James that. You're like, oh, that's real. I thought it was all blood. You gotta kill.
Yeah, it's like real life, like James Bond.
They're not allowed to do that.
They just put a filter on it.
Like, they're fucking trying to, like, fucking shit on Joe Rogan with COVID.
Remember what they did to George Zimmerman?
They made him look whiter.
They're making the killer whales look more dangerous.
What did George Zimmerman look like?
He was, like, a Latino guy, and they made him look white when they took those.
All the news stations made him look white.
Yeah, I didn't like how everyone was like, George Zimmerman
represents white supremacy. I'm like, yeah, that's a
fucking Mexican guy. Yeah, but he did have a
white ass last name. He had like a very white
last name. Zimmerman? Yeah.
What is he up to? That's a Jewish last name.
What is Zimmerman up to? He actually
is a scumbag. He probably works for Mint Mobile.
He auctioned off the gun he killed
that kid with.
He auctioned off the gun he killed Trayvon Martin with
And then I think eBay removed it from the auction
Who bought that gun?
Robert E. Lee?
Richard Spencer bought it
He hung it up like a moose head
He's gotta be out there doing something
You know what I mean?
I think he's in...
Isn't he in jail?
No, he got off.
Didn't he beat his wife or some shit?
Maybe.
Look it up, but I think what he does now to make a living,
and my guess is that he goes to gun shows,
and he rents a booth,
and he just signs autographs.
That's insane.
No, I'm guessing.
I'm guessing.
Oh, okay.
That would be insane.
But so yeah, somebody pays him to sit at their booth at a gun show or something.
That dude is fucking Latino.
He sued their family.
He sued the Trayvon Martin family for $100 million.
Did he win?
Why did he sue them?
Because he won the case and he's like, it was all bullshit.
But he's like, you damaged my reputation.
Yeah, you can't get a job anymore.
No way he won. If I saw him walking down the street, I wouldn't know a job anymore. Hmm. No way he won.
If I saw him
walking down the street,
I wouldn't know who he was.
There's nothing really,
where is George Zimmerman now?
All right,
let's watch this.
Not guilty.
In the 10 years
since George Zimmerman
shot and killed Trayvon Mark,
he's remained
Look at him.
God.
He looks like he killed
Trayvon for the Skittles.
Look at that white guy, dude.
Look at that white man.
Man, what a big case.
This was the craziest thing fucking ever.
Who's the chick?
Is that his wife?
That's his fucking fat wife.
Why is the audio so, like, in one ear?
Eh.
Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.
Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.
He's like, I did it once, yeah, yeah, yeah. And he's gonna shoot us.
He's like, I did it once, I can do it again.
He's like me.
I hang outside a liquor store looking for black kids buying candy.
No bigger threat to society
than a black kid that's all hopped up on Mike Sykes.
How did you get... She's a racist lady.
She's a racist.
Damn, he can't stop putting guns in women.
He just broke my Oakleys.
And he used my Billabong shirt to wipe up the blood!
He's ruined everything I own!
Scheib later recanted her story, and the case against Zimmerman was dropped.
In late 2013, Zimmerman started selling his own art...
Oh, wow.
Wow, that's great art, Zim.
That's amazing.
Dude, he sold out first.
Somebody has MS paints.
Thanks, Zim.
Oh, I thought it was Kamala Harris.
The Associated Press said it imitated a copyrighted photo.
Oh, my God.
In early 2015, Zimmerman was again charged with domestic assault
after allegedly throwing a wine bottle.
Oh, Amber Heard.
Once again, no charges were filed
because the alleged victim recanted her story.
In the three years after his trial.
Dude's kind of fucking invincible.
So he basically just turned into Jake LaMotta
after the trial.
But he gets off with everything.
He's amazing.
He's like John Gotti.
What does he do in court?
What does he do?
He's a Teflon Don.
It doesn't even go to court.
Teflon won.
He just has great eyes.
Yeah, he's really beautiful.
You can get away with anything if you're beautiful,
like George is everything.
What a sexy beast. George is like, you're a monster, Zimmerman. What a sexy beast.
You're a monster, Zimmerman, but you're so goddamn
beautiful. But goddamn it, meet me in the parking lot.
Fucking George Zimmerman
in the parking lot.
That's what George Zimmerman does.
Imagine him
banging. Oh my god.
He's like, put the gun to my head.
In his personal life, George Zimmerman was under investigation by the Department of Justice. Oh my god. He's like, put the gun to my head.
She goes, and I would know.
I fucked him.
I got the chance to suck him dry. Whoa. Also in 2015, Zimmerman would make headlines again when Matthew Apperson fired a gunshot at him during a road race.
Whoa.
Dude, what is-
What the fuck?
This guy lives like he's Doc Holliday.
He kicks ass.
I can't say George Zimmerman kicks ass.
How many fucking gunfights has he been?
He's always got a gun.
What is going on?
People in Florida, they die and they go, they die like Jesse James.
They go, yeah, I had a bunch of gunfights.
I was at a Pluckers and had to shoot a guy once.
A guy shot at me and then I got off.
And then 10 years later, another gunfight.
Wait, George Zimmerman fired at this guy?
Another guy shot at him.
Oh, okay.
Well, I mean, you know.
Look at him.
He looks like he eats bullets.
I don't believe Black Lives Matter is a movement, sir.
They're terrorist cowards.
No, they're a real estate group, George.
Get it right.
There we go.
He sold his gun.
Jesus Christ, dude. Are you kidding me?
He made $140,000 off a murder weapon for a national case?
Yeah.
Of a rich hillbillies.
Damn.
Dude, we got to find out.
That shouldn't be that hard.
We got to go on a hunt, and we got to find the guy who has that hanging in his living room.
That shouldn't be that hard.
I don't think there's a lot of people out there that could just drop $100,000. Do you think so? $140,000 on something
like that that are also Republican races.
Super deep NRA dudes that are
very in favor of the
First Amendment. There's a lot of people out there that have
that money to easily drop some
racist memorabilia.
Maybe they went public and said
I own it now.
I don't know what happened, but yeah,
there are a lot of rich people
hidden in the country
that can just buy racist shit.
Hunter Biden.
Think about all the guys
that collect Hitler memorabilia.
Yeah.
That goes for fucking millions of dollars.
Yeah.
And these people would just hate Jews.
Sure, I bet this guy bought it.
This doctor had this thing.
I watched like 10 minutes of it,
and it was a,
it was,
it's a little interesting.
Let's check this out, okay?
This doctor was called the N-word by one of his clients.
What do doctors call the people that come in?
Not clients.
Patients.
Patients.
Right, right, right.
Of course.
Of course.
What the fuck is going on there?
He wanted to make sure you knew.
I'm testing you, dipshit.
Okay?
Gotcha.
I cover every base.
So anyway, let's check this guy out.
What is this?
In my chair, not too long ago,
a black person in my chair, not too long ago,
called me the N-word.
Well, maybe he's not a doctor.
Is he a dentist, maybe?
He looks like he should be.
I guess, is that dentist color?
I don't know.
I can't tell.
More specifically, he called me his N-word.
You my N-word.
This guy looks like a young Kevin Kline.
Doesn't he?
I can't remember who that is.
Kevin Kline.
He looks like a Civil War soldier.
I'm right again.
Here we go.
I believe you.
You're always great with lookalikes.
I am autistic as hell.
Let's see.
Oh, shit.
That's a young Kevin Kline.
Oh.
You look at him.
Can you type in young Kevin Kline?
Yeah, let's do that.
I almost want to say the poor man's Robin Williams, but he's also a fantastic actor.
Look at that. A bit.
Getting quite close. Look at that.
Can we see him with a beard?
There's gotta be. It was the 70s
or 80s. They didn't have beards.
The actors didn't have beards back then.
And then. Sure. That's close.
A little. Yeah. That's Kevin Klein.
Yeah. Klein.
It's never happened to me before.
Never had a black person.
Definitely not at work.
For sure.
I don't think any time in my entire life has that ever happened.
At the same time, he puts his hand out like this.
I don't get it.
You've never been called the N-word by a black dude?
Like, what?
You should be ashamed of yourself.
Yeah.
What the hell have you been up to?
Yeah.
You never once had any fun?
Are you kidding me? You never once had any fun? Are you kidding me?
You never once were cool around black guys?
You've never once been, like,
kind of cool. Crazy.
Yeah. Every white
guy knows. I have a list
in my head every time that's happened. Every white guy has
a whole file cabinet in their head
of the times they've been called the N-word by a black
guy. My favorite memories.
Yeah.
Even with an ER, it's great.
The best feeling in the world.
Best feeling ever.
N-word.
Puts his hand out, and then my hand goes into his.
So imagine one of these hands is black.
Yes.
And then the hands come together.
Is he being funny?
It felt like a sonic boom was created.
This warmth entered my body. Why would you do this? And I felt like a sonic boom was created. This warmth entered my body.
Why would you do this?
And I felt like we solved racism.
Just right then and there.
It was like everything's okay.
We are cool AF.
Dr. Brady's good.
We're good.
That's what it felt like.
What did I do for him?
I rushed his crown.
So crowns normally are a 10 day turnaround
And he was traveling and had some commitments
Like I gotta have that sooner
And I was like let me make a phone call
Have it back to you in 3 days
You my boom
Hand clasp
Sonic boom
Sonic boom
So now I'm his ride or die
And I don't think he knows knows give me sonic boom again you know
that term how come he knows ride or die but he's all shocked by being called the n-word
this is brutal are you kidding me what is going on in this country where people that have like
jobs that they've had to go to college for are they're just like they go right on the internet
and they just are like yeah i'm gonna get i'm gonna fire myself it's not enough he must own the practice that's my only explanation
i think possibly yeah he owns i think that it's just now the new currency it's no longer being
respected in your field or having like a respected title like doctor dentist what it's now like the
only thing that gets any that anybody cares about is am i going viral on tiktok yeah it's true it's like fuck it i i just finished fucking 10 years of school but i don't have any
numbers on fucking tiktok your fucking heart surgeon's doing doing the the a dance covid
right before yeah it is covid did this all those nurses fuck them he wishes he was a nurse he
wanted to be an rn sure let's see that let's listen to the double meaning there he wishes he was a nurse he wanted to be an RN sure let's listen to the double meaning there
he wishes he was a
right folks
a real ass
not gonna say it
but yeah that's what it was
call him your n-word
it comes at a cost
it comes at a cost
because now I think,
I mean,
I'm not going to say the N word,
but I'm thinking about it.
I'm thinking about,
I shouldn't be thinking about that.
Wow.
But I am thinking about it.
And I know,
I know I shouldn't,
but it's like you get into a club.
What is that?
How is he?
You're never going to get into a normal,
but someone vouches for you.
So you're in there.
Now you're in the club. That doesn't mean you so you're in there now you're in the club that
doesn't mean you can act like a fool when you're in the club you can't do that you'll get kicked
out of the club never invited back so i'm in the club and i'm so excited like i just don't know if
i can behave myself so that's the cost he seems like the guy that you would be like fuck we got
to go out to lunch with him i hope he doesn't say anything fucking annoying or like too gross
around the people we are in public he doesn't seem fun enough to have this like riff
he's doing right now he seems like a very boring dentist guy yes yeah yes well dentists are
psychopaths yeah they're crazy high suicide imagine devoting your life to fucking like mouth
uh bones mouths are so fucking gross or disgusting. All day you just work on fucking mouth knives.
Mouth bones.
What a weird, weird freak you have to be.
Mouth knives.
Does it feel good?
It might be the most amazing thing
that's ever happened to me in my life.
Definitely in my career.
Definitely in my career.
For sure.
Dude, does this guy live in pleasantville
how has he never heard black people say the n-word it's got to be like utah or some shit
you know what i mean he's never had black people just like
be like yo this yeah this dude like you know devon Yeah. Yeah. I mean, I guess it's not that crazy, but the way he's acting, to put this online is insane,
especially as a guy that's like, what do dentists make?
They make a couple hundred thousand a year.
Well, first of all, if you own your own practice, you could make, I don't know if it's practice
or what, but if you own your own dentist place, you're a millionaire.
Right.
So at the very least, hundreds of thousands of dollars.
I think what we're seeing here is a guy that is super unfulfilled,
and he became a dentist, and it didn't fill whatever was empty in him
like you thought it would.
Yeah.
My parents are proud of me, but it's just not quite giving me the thing I thought.
He's like, all right, let me try to be creative.
I'll be the viral dentist.
I'll be the viral dentist.
I'll do a comedy routine on TikTok.
I don't think he's behind enemy lines
in like a major city
where he could potentially be canceled
on Yelp for this.
I think he's probably,
he probably runs a small practice
in like fucking Montana.
I would say somewhere in the Midwest.
Absolutely.
All his patients probably think
this is hilarious.
You know what I mean?
Mm-hmm.
Mm-hmm.
For the American Academy
of Cosmetic Dentistry
oh that's a nice certificate
have you ever had a black person call you their n-word
no
keep working
keep working hard you'll get there
trust me just keep working hard
it's the pinnacle
he didn't even do real dental work
I bet he put in a grill
he's in MacArthur Park
putting in grills
of accomplishment I don't even care about anything else that's all i want i want that
more what's the only thing better than having that happen once have it happen twice so i think
this is a liberal this is a liberal video to make in 1999 yes you know what i mean yes this is when
you go wow that's what it's kind of funny and shocking
to be like a white guy that's like i was called the n word it's like seinfeld comedy yeah exactly
there's a whole seinfeld episode where jerry gets called the n word and he's like oh my god
right right also what you're not seeing in the background behind outside of the office is about
eight hysterical hens, dental hygienists.
These chicks who are glued to their phones all fucking day,
showing each other TikToks.
And then one day he does something,
or they convince him to do like a little dance on TikTok.
And he does it.
And now all these girls like, oh, he's so funny.
We love him.
He did that.
And now he's like, I'm addicted to TikTok.
And I'm going to fucking keep doing wacky TikToks. Oh, there's cops that can't stop doing TikTok.
Oh, yeah.
There's cops that are in their squad car fucking doing TikTok.
Insane.
It's so gay.
It's the gayest shit I've ever heard.
They need to show the black guy who called him the N-word this video
so he can recant the N-word.
Yeah, I bet it was like fucking Cornel West. he's like i never said it what does he talk what
i never said what it's like condoleezza rice is his patient do you think condoleezza rice
has ever said the n-word to. She wish you wish you wish you
self flagellate
the mirror like that fucking movie
we watch the world.
Condoleezza Rice just looks in the mirror.
Who's the other guy? Fucking
colonoscopy pal. Yeah.
That means I have to rush crowns
for all my black patients.
Is that racist?
Jesus Christ.
I don't care.
I don't care.
I'm chasing that feeling.
I'm solving racism
one rushed crown at a time.
What a terrible idea for Joe. I want gonna see the rest of this guy's stuff later
i don't know anything about that uh dr brady smith brady jesus christ i don't know what's up
with dr brady smith okay this uh was interesting i didn't watch it but uh i just saw the title and
i looked at the at the screenshot and it like, this is the first time meeting a transgender person in Texas.
Let's see.
Oh, shit.
None of us have seen this.
I doubt it's positive, but maybe it is.
Maybe they're like amazed.
Yeah, this guy doesn't look like someone who would be happy.
He doesn't look like he'd be happy about it, but we never know.
You don't want to judge a fatso with a beard by its cover.
Yeah.
We all know that there's people that are
disgusted whenever they see a trans person.
And I'm one of them.
And we all know of the people
who don't care if they
see a trans person.
But apparently, we're
a third type of person.
Or at least I am.
I can't.
I thought that was legitimate in the video.
Oh, my God.
I bet that is it.
You're probably right, Joey.
See, we just kind of had our first experience with the trans woman.
See, she walked in behind us, and I opened the door for her just as I would anybody.
And I didn't think twice about
who she was.
You said, hey, Action Brownson.
Could I get your autograph?
That's a trans woman.
Can I meet you in the bathroom?
I carved a glory hole into the
truck stop stall.
So I looked at her and I said, you better not say anything about last night.
When I tell you how happy it made me,
I'm getting emotional now.
Wow.
Okay, fuck it.
Oh my God.
To be able to see somebody be out and open to the world here.
What is he hiding?
He goes, I just wish I could be out and open to the world here. What is he hiding? He goes, I just wish I could be
out and open to the world.
He goes, I wish I could tell my son I'd like to do
the same thing to the can
that he's doing in the back seat.
You just gotta know how much
bravery that takes.
Dude, shut up. Right, Mikey?
Hell yeah! Dude, oh my
God.
I wanted to say something to her, but then I realized I'd probably look weird, you know, smiling at a stranger.
But if you're a trans woman and you came here to the landmark truck stop in Clyde, Texas.
I mean, come on.
Come on.
I want to let you know you can have my wallet.
Yeah.
And that you serviced me particularly well.
He's like a Coen Brothers character
all of a sudden.
Particularly.
Just know
we're proud of you.
Right, Mikey?
Yep.
Mikey looks like Ellen Page. That is not where I thought it was going to go
Elliot Page
Fucking asshole
Jesus Christ
What a fag
Do we have any
There's no corner this week
I think we're taking a week off
Next week we're doing
We have the best corner coming up next week.
We have shoe on the pod.
Oh, yeah, shoe's coming.
Shoe's coming.
Yeah, I don't know if we have time for a corner.
The week after, we'll do the Devon's Hollywood Hangout.
It's the next corner.
Okay.
Oh, is this a Hollywood store?
Are you going to even be in town for that?
Oh, I might not be.
But so, the week after.
We can run it.
All right, we'll see.
Let's do one more video.
There's an Asian family.
They beat their son
for spending their entire life savings
on in-game content.
Totally fair.
Right?
Totally fucking fair.
Right?
He spent all their money?
You never know.
At their whole country?
Let's flip the headlines here.
This could be over,
you know,
he ate the last fucking,
you know,
the fucking last package of seaweed.
Yeah.
Oh,
this is sad.
Jesus,
Jesus Christ.
This is sad.
It's really fucked up,
but my favorite punishment,
but my favorite thing is this guy who's gaming,
who is not paying attention to anything.
Oh,
okay.
So these are,
these are,
uh,
internet cafes in China.
People like fucking live in these things. Like it's pathetic. So like, you'll get like, paying attention to anything oh okay so these are these are uh internet cafes in china people like
fucking live in these things like it's pathetic so like you'll get like because china has like
way more men than women so there's way more retarded incels in china than than in like i
think even in america so yeah so i think people will actually not enough shootings get those
shootings guns you know so they just they have a lot of stabbings, I think, but people just live in these internet cafes
like, and just spend all their money.
They'll sleep in them because they're open 24-7.
It's kind of like, it's kind of like staying at Wee's
Bar. Those people who live at Wee's Bar, they just do it there.
So I think probably this guy, like, escaped his rural
family, like, went to this internet cafe
and just spent all their money. And that's why they're
beating him. Or he's a child that goes
to the internet cafe. I don't know. He doesn't look that old.
No, it is a kid that spent
his family's money. The best part about the video
is this guy that's playing
games that doesn't seem to care that there's
a child being beaten half to death.
He's like, I got a killing spree going right now.
I don't give a fuck. He's like, my fucking call,
my Counter-Strike numbers are out of this world
right now. I'm like, nah, I don't care.
It's a ladder match.
How old is this fucking kid?
Damn, that big girl
is holding him down.
Damn, that is
not fun to listen to.
Also, take your beating
like a man
if you're gonna do
a little shit.
If you spent your family's entire life savings
I mean come on
I'd do the same thing
I mean he's hitting him with a keyboard now
You would do the same thing John
If my child
You beat your child in public
If my child fucking spent my life savings on fucking like candy crush
Why'd your child have access to your life savings
That's a good fucking point
If he escaped my fucking home and then went to some internet cafe
And spent all my money
Why did these retards let their kid have access to their money Like that Did he escape my fucking home and then went to some internet cafe and spent all my money?
Why did these retards let their kid have access to their money?
Yeah, that's idiotic. There's no excuse.
Well, I mean, if somehow he hacked my bank account, you know what I mean, or some shit.
I would hit him with a keyboard.
If my kid hacked my bank account, I wouldn't even be upset.
I'd be like, all right, now it's time for another hack.
Oh, so you'd...
I'd use that. I'd be like, I didn't know I had time for another hack. Oh, so you'd... I'd use that.
I'd be like, I didn't know I had a fucking beautiful mind on my hands.
Hugh Jackman from that Halle Berry movie.
Yeah, I would be like, all right, so let's use you.
Okay.
This looks like a grown man getting hit.
Maybe a 14-year-old.
Is it an actual child?
Can we see him?
hit. Maybe a 14-year-old. Is it an actual child? Can we see him?
I mean, the kids...
That's some big legs, bro. This guy's being a bitch.
The kid's putting on a show.
But it is crazy.
He's Chinese people.
Take him home and beat him in private.
It's very uncouth.
He's turning into Joe Pesci.
He's, like, slamming keyboards on his head.
You stuttering mothering prick, you!
You stuttering mothering prick!
You Jew motherfucker, you!
Yeah.
You are not wise guy!
Mainland Chinese people have no manners.
You know what was a really common thing when I was in China?
Chinese people have no sense of any of their surroundings, seemingly.
They can't tell up from down.
Chinese people are the only people that will have a $10,000 camera
and they use it to take pictures of themselves in front of
the mall directory yeah they're just standing in front of it with their family yes we are here
this is greatest moment of our lives you make sure you use twenty thousand dollar dslr
they uh i remember it was really common to just they would just let their toddlers
just squat and shit in like a mall like on the floor you'd like go into like a mall in china
when i was in beijing and you just see little kids like taking shits are you fucking kidding
i'm not fucking with you dude they're like in a park they would just it was like fine to just
let your child squat and shit anywhere they wanted well they opened a disneyland in china
and it almost instantly got closed down because
everybody was just shitting all over.
Yeah. Like, right in the
walkways, like, in public. They just
shit the whole place up and they had to close it down.
Yeah, and in Hong Kong, like, there's, like, signs
that are like, do not shit or spit here.
Like, because in Hong Kong, like, people are a bit
more, like, civilized. Civilized.
And then, like, the mainland Chinese people come over
and just, like, spit everywhere and then, like, they don't know how to wait in lines. They don the mainland Chinese people come over and just spit everywhere.
And then they don't know how to wait in lines.
They don't know how lines work.
Hong Kong kicks ass.
Macau kicks ass.
Macau seems cool.
Macau is the shit.
It's one of the best...
I think it's the best city maybe on Earth. I gotta say, it's Bond.
Mainland China, they have some issues.
But there's just like billions of people
and it's hard to manage.
It's tough to have a lot of public toilets.
I like Taiwan more than China.
What's that about? Yeah, that's the Republic of China. I like Taiwan more than China. What's that about?
That's the Republic of China.
I like Taiwanese food more.
Really?
What's your favorite dish?
Taiwanese food's much better.
It's like dumplings and shit, right?
Dumplings,
dan dan noodles.
Dan dan noodles?
Dan dan noodles.
They got the spicy peanuts.
They got wood ear mushrooms.
They got all these,
they got these sides
that are actually
Pretty good pal
You go to China
You gotta eat a fucking
You gotta eat a
Duck's foot
You know
Taiwanese food's
Fucking great
You got the minced pork
With maybe
There's a little
Cardamom in it
What's cardamom?
I don't know
It's like a spice
A spice
Okay
It tastes like cinnamon
Kind of
You get this like pork
That's like cinnamony
Spicy but also cinnamony
Salty
Spicy, salty
And then it's on rice
And there's a boiled egg
And I don't know
I like
Look at Taiwanese food today
Taiwanese food
I was just about to say
We should go to a dumpling house
Taiwanese food rocks
The fucking shit
Dumplings can't be Taiwanese
Are they?
No, I don't know
That's like dim sum
I think
Hong Kong's a big dim sum
place, too. Alright.
Yeah, I don't know. I just feel like if I went to
China, I'd hate all the food.
Well, it's good. If I went to China,
I'd ask where the Panda Express
is. They do have those. It's like
real Mexican tacos.
They don't have cheese in them. And you're just like,
yeah, they have a cojita. Exactly. What the fuck?
Everyone always tells you out here in LA, they go, you got to go to the authentic.
The Mexican.
The Mexican.
The Oaxacan.
And it's like, there's a cactus in my burrito.
This is not.
I didn't.
My night, I didn't want to have my mouth pierced by a cactus.
There's a scorpion in this.
Sorry.
I'm not really that into this.
Okay.
I don't like fried crickets.
Okay. That's not like authentic Mexican to me
There's a child
In my burrito
There's a smuggled child
El Chapo's fingers in my taco
There's a fucking tunnel in my taco
Chapito is crawling out of my flouta
This isn't the best
This isn't the best
Put some sour cream, some guacamole
You know fucking appropriation's great How about that folks This isn't the best. This isn't the best. Put some sour cream, some guacamole.
You know, fucking appropriation's great.
How about that, folks?
Put some french fries in there.
Enough of the anti-appropriation horse shit.
Mexican burritos should have some other stuff in it. If you go get an authentic Mexican taco truck burrito,
you wonder what it tastes like.
It tastes like you're eating hay with pinto beans.
burrito. I wonder what it tastes like. It tastes like you're eating hay with pinto beans.
It's
dried chicken
with fucking rice that's been
sitting around for fucking years.
And it's just not
fun. But you go to some place
made by, you know, some
place in San Diego, if you will,
and you got the guacamole, you got
the sour cream, the pico de gallo.
They add stuff to it.
They make it mushy and nice.
If you want like a family,
like if you take your family out to Mexican food,
you want it to be like shitty.
You want like Tex-Mex.
El Compadre.
El Compadre.
Yes, you want something that's like,
kind of like everything has,
there's like a pepperoncini and everything
at El Compadre for some reason.
No.
They have a fucking,
they give me a pepperoncini on top of my everything. Okay, on the side. Yeah, on the side. Pepperoncini and everything at El Pompadre for some reason. They have a fucking, they give me a pepperoncini on top of my everything.
Okay, on the side.
Yeah, on the side.
Pepperoncini on the side.
Yeah, but I was like, what's Mexican about that?
Yeah, I don't know.
It just needs more cheese.
There's never cheese in authentic Mexican burritos.
They never put cheese in it.
You always have to ask and they look at you like you're a white piece of shit.
Every time I go to Dona Stella, you know, our favorite taco truck,
I end up,
it takes me 10 minutes
to tell them like,
okay,
everything on it.
They're like,
what do you,
what is everything?
I don't know,
fucking cilantro,
onions,
could be cheese,
sour cream,
avocado,
all the shit that you know I want.
Why,
you know what I was asking for
when I said that.
And if you didn't order that,
the burrito you ordered
would have,
would have,
it would have tasted like
what a horse sleeps on.
It also goes from
$12 to $30
after every order.
What are you going to do?
I don't know.
Should we wrap this up, I guess?
Should we try and do a song?
I don't know. I feel weird now without the songs.
I feel like people are going to hate us.
But maybe let them wanting more.
Yeah.
Leave them wanting more.
Leave them wanting more.
Sure, sure.
Okay.
All right.
Because do we, I mean, like what, we don't, I guess.
I have no clue.
Is there an Orca song?
Is there a whale song?
I would just do a song about John being gay.
I mean, I really have nothing else.
Let's save it for Shoe.
Because Shoe's going to want a live song.
Yeah.
Okay.
All right.
You know, we're going to do Shu's.
Shu is going to be coming on Jack's memorial this next Friday.
That's going to be weird.
We should make him be like, hey, come next day or the day before.
It's kind of odd.
I feel like we'd be like pissing on his grave by having on a maniac pedophile hunter.
Jack would be like, what the fuck?
Jack would be so like, why would you, you know, this is terrible.
Yeah, but a schedule's a schedule, Jack.
Okay, hey, you made the decision, not me.
So we're going to be doing that episode.
Hey, Jack, if you stayed alive, you could have stopped us.
Yeah, you could have stopped us if you wanted to, fucking asshole.
Yeah, we'll do it.
But he wants to do a pedophile hunt the next day.
I feel like the next day I'm just going to be consumed with...
I'll go on the pedophile hunt.
I don't know.
I kind of want to just, like, kind of dream...
I imagine I'm going to be hanging out with people that are also sad about...
Yeah, same.
I don't know if I can do that.
I don't mean either.
I didn't know when I signed up for that that it was the same.
I didn't think about...
I would be doing a podcast with him and then, like, signing up to do the thing.
Who's going to think we're such bitches?
But I didn't even think about that.
It's not going to feel right. He doesn't care about suicide.
He's forced a bunch of people to suicide.
Ah, yeah.
But they were bad. Bad people.
I'm kidding. I'm just saying. I didn't even realize.
It's a very morbid day and it's going to
feel weird going on a pedophile
hunt with Shue. Big, wacky game
show pedophile hunt.
If next Friday we're already doing an episode with him,
I'm not sure I'm going to have it in me to the next day not.
I've got to have a day.
Same.
I'm going to have a day.
You and I, we should go.
You know what we should do?
We should go to all the places he lived at.
Yeah, we'll go to the.
Take pictures.
Go to the Korea town manhattan
um the other one on rampart go back to your place because he lived he lives
the weirdest thing about this is that jack when he died lived right by joseph he always lived
right by me yeah he actually always ended up living right by you other than when he lived
on rampart for a little bit.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
He lived on Rampart for like a year and a half, two years.
I was in like Santa Monica during that.
Yeah, you were in Santa Monica.
But other than that, you lived in two locations
where you were 0.2 miles away from him every time.
Yeah, my first place that I ever moved into in Koreatown,
I moved in and Devin came over for the first time
and was like, oh shit, dude.
Jack lives like right there.
It was very bizarre. And then
yeah, so then I went to Santa Monica
after that. I was in Koreatown
there for like five years, but then Santa Monica for like a year
or two. And then the next place
I moved was Little Tokyo. Same exact
thing. Devin was like, oh,
Jack lives right fucking there. And it was just
a weird thing where each place I'm walking around, Jack was right fucking there. And it was just a weird thing where each place
I'm walking around, I just see Jack
everywhere. Yeah. So
next Saturday, let's
we'll play it by ear,
but I don't know if I immediately
I think I might have signed up for a pedophile hunt too quickly.
I can't.
Let's talk to Keith. Maybe he's got
something planned for Jack. I imagine next Saturday
we'll just...
I can all invite people.
We can all just hang out at my deck.
Let's do that or something.
We can go to your...
I don't know.
We can just hang out at a bar or something,
but I don't know if I want to be hunting pedophiles.
I can't hunt a pedophile.
I'm actually with you.
I can't hunt a pedophile.
I can't do that.
I thought about it today.
I was like, oh, shit.
That's the same...
Nah, I just don't know.
I like the idea of going on a bar hop of Jack's favorite places.
We'll go to the wine bar at the end.
We'll go chronological where it's like, oh, in Koreatown,
and we'll go here, and then blah, blah, blah.
I went to the Mermaid with him out in Koreatown,
or out in your area, Little Tokyo.
Yeah, we should go to every place and do what blacks do
and pour liquor out.
How dare you?
We should go buy Hennessy and pour it out at all the places they live.
Jack probably, I don't know if you love that or hate that.
I really don't care what he thinks anymore.
That's a good point.
You're angry at Jack.
He's a dead asshole.
You're now angry at him.
Who I love, but I kind of want him, that's what he should be screaming.
You're trolling him up in heaven. I'm going to troll him him... That's what he should be screaming. He should be...
You're trolling him up in heaven.
I'm going to troll him.
I'm going to do everything he hates.
I'm going to dance really badly.
We should listen to the worst music ever.
Have your shoulders super up.
Yeah, my shoulders are up.
He always used to make fun of me for having my shoulders up.
Oh, man, I miss him so much.
Rest in peace to the great Jack Knight.
We love you to death. Yeah, you fucking say it, man. You miss him so much. Rest in peace to the great Jack Knight. We love you to death.
Yeah, you fucking say it, man.
You better fucking say it.
Okay? Huh?
Yeah.
I don't know what I'm doing.
Weird month.
It's a weird month.
Dude, there's a weird vibe in the air
for the past three weeks.
July will always be weird to me.
Imagine, it's kind
of crazy like if you have friends in your life that are and if you kill yourself you can make
that month miserable for them for the rest of their lives oh yeah i will never live through
another july where i'm not like all fucked up and weird the minute it was like a couple days before
july started and i remember i was like oh oh, shit. It's coming up already?
In June, I started going like, holy shit, it's been a fucking year.
And that's what's sick about it is that it feels like it was literally fucking,
like, it feels like it was like four weeks ago to me.
It was a weird.
Very bizarre period of time.
It felt really long and very fast at the same time for me.
Like, it felt like 10 years. It felt long. Yeah, exactly.
But also when I think back, I'm just like
that could have been fucking yesterday.
Exactly. That's what I feel like. I mean,
I remember being in
Seattle with you like it was
yesterday. I feel like we did that
episode where we like recapped Seattle
like just yesterday. Same. It's very
bizarre. Very bizarre.
Anyway,
um,
you know,
hug your loved ones and,
uh,
take their guns away.
Don't kill yourselves.
Just don't,
just don't kill yourself.
Okay.
We got a very suicidal audience.
So this is a good message.
This is a good message.
Don't kill yourself.
Yeah.
And also like you definitely don't kill yourself cause you weren't even,
you're not even talented.
You know how much harder it is when the guy that kills himself that you love is talented?
Oh, it's way worse.
Way worse.
So if you kill yourself and you're not talented, dude, no one's going to fucking care.
I think you're making it worse.
Now they're probably, you're making, you're like talking them into it.
No, they should care.
The only reason, if you die, you want people to care.
So you got to go work.
You get out there, you fucking work.
They're like, I don't fucking want to work, dude.
Like, working makes me want to kill myself.
I can't get out of bed.
How about this?
Then kill yourself.
Oh, no.
No, no, no, no, no, no, no.
I'm saying.
You're going to have to bleep that.
Yeah, bleep it, bud.
Make yourself noteworthy.
Yeah.
So then if you do make
a really retarded decision. Like, who the fuck cares
about noteworthiness, dude? I'm a fuck. I've got a
fucking shotgun barrel in my mouth. I live in
fucking Springfield, Missouri, and my
life sucks. Here's the thing. I gotta care.
Here's the true advice. Message John
and talk to him privately on Instagram, because he's
a really good guy for your voice. I'm a really nice guy to
talk people off the edge. Yeah.
John Badman 2Ds on Instagram.
If you're ready to kill yourself, message John.
If you're really depressed, you can hit me up. I don't care.
He's the best guy to talk to about that, but anyways.
Message John,
because people can't
believe John hasn't killed himself.
Yeah, it's kind of wild.
It's wild. Listen, fellas.
Been there, done that.
I love you guys. I love all of you, fellas. Been there, done that. I love you guys.
I love all of you too.
Yeah.
Thank you. Dragon energy. Dragon energy.
Dragon energy, baby. Dragon energy.
Good night. Good night. Love everybody.
This is the first time we're taking a break.