Hate Watch with Devan Costa - Family Affair

Episode Date: August 7, 2023

Sorry about the edits - we had some technical difficulties throughout the episode. Island Boys incest, Kohburger's alibi proves his innocence, gas station owners beat a thief with a stick, lady has a baby with her Nicaraguan kayak guide and makes videos about it, Devan attempts to call her racist but sounds worse. Get weekly bonus episodes: https://www.patreon.com/HateWatchPodcast  

It's good to be in something from the ground floor. I came too late for that. I know. But lately I'm getting the feeling that I came in at the end. The best is over. Many Americans, I think, feel that way. You guys hear yourselves?

Yeah, I could. You guys can hear me, right? Yes. Cause I'm an island boy and I fuck my family a couple of island boys having anal sex with each other we're brothers what do they do in the video do we know is there like a is there like a like a play-by-play like they go into a court case i don't really know if there's a JCS on it yet.

There's a 30 for 30 on the Island Boys. They haven't done a 30 for 30 yet, but here's a little bit of the Island Boys. Oh, come on. Give me. By the way, does anyone know who the Island Boys are? What is their thing? Apparently, they're on Epstein's Island.

That's fake. That's fake? Good Lord, John. They were roots on Epstein's Island. They look like little roots. They were trees. They look like... Look at these guys. Look at the pineapples.

They look like when you leave a potato in the dark for too long. It starts sprouting. And then it looks like somebody drew on them. So these are the Island Boys, and I guess they bang each other. And it's been a big sensation well so they got famous i don't know maybe two or three years ago they had that video in a hot tub in some like big florida backyard and it was just them chilling and somebody's filming them and they're just going like it's the island boys they have a song yeah one of them's named fly soldier and they have a song called like island boy and they're twins and they have the same like tattoos and then so they would switch off saying

i'm the island boys and then they just became like viral fuck boys and they would show up to like boxing events and pick fights with jake paul and now uh they're French kissing and they're doing gay porn together. I kind of like that I like the progress of that. I like the natural progression of that. I was talking to John about it earlier today and it's like

we're out of shit so I guess we should just like fuck each other. I'm driving into work and devon's like yep you know they're uh just out of stuff and all that's left is to just have sex with each other that's what's gonna happen to the hate watch podcast in about five years in in five years we'll be like dude i don't i don't have any more jokes in me like should we all bang yeah let's just do we'll do a suck patreon yeah this is all star fucking each other. That's good content.

So here's, I guess this is some video of them saying something about this. Kissing your brother on Twitter is wow. There's no proof of us kissing on Twitter. Yeah. There's no proof of that. I don't know what you're talking about. Yeah. That's completely wrong.

Yeah. Yeah. Are they being like, they're trying to be like funny there, right? Because there is. Because they're gay. Because they, then they. Oh, here we go. And they did this.

Let's go. That's his brother. Whoa. Oh, dude. And the one that's not kissing his neck is the one that came out as gay. The one kissing his neck is like, I ain't gay. This is fucking creepy. It's.

Dude. We live in utter hell. Look at these things. That is so sexual. Look at these things. Oh, no, dude. That is so sexual. Look at these things. Oh, no, dude. They're Frenchie. Ew, dude.

Oh, God. You know, they shouldn't be allowed in any bathroom in America. That's disgusting, dude. They should have their own island, which is those two. Yes. Yes. They should be. You know that video of like Americans

going to that island where the tribesmen have like never seen people before? Send them there. They should be sent there. They just make out with everybody. They should be spit roasted

by the natives of that island. Hey, Gouders, I need you to- Look at that. He's got like a big scar on his face

probably from a new, who knows, some sort of sexual, you know,, I need you. Look at that. He's got like a big scar on his face, probably from a new, who knows, some sort of sexual, you know, disease on his cheek. Just eating him alive. His brother comes battery acid. Flesh eating battery acid. Like the aliens in Alien. I mean, they are, they'll be, I mean, they'll be dead in a few years.

So we can take solace in that, but. Goon, all right? All the Island Boys goon all the time, okay? And gooning is jacking off, right? Gooning is when you start to jack off, but you don't come, and you just keep a boner for hours and hours. I thought it was edging.

I thought that's edging, too. I thought gooning was edging. No, no. There's a little difference between edging and gooning. I'm not exactly sure what it is, but I think gooning might just be when you're doing it by yourself. Edging is when you're doing it with a partner.

And gooning is when it's just jacking off by yourself. But they keep talking about gooning. Together? That means they're each gooning separately. They're not edging each other. They're gooning individually. Okay. So, yeah.

Interesting. Why can that popular alcohol called Goon actually drink that shit up? By the way, if I'm wrong on that, don't fucking come at me. Yeah. Like, let us know in the comments. Comment below.

Comment below and subscribe. Boy, and I am lit. Love going in with my best mate. My brother too, we gonna be goon. Please subscribe to the Goon Case Reddit. Hey, consider gooning with us. It's alright, we have fun. Gooning is lit.

Please come goon with us. That should be our theme song. Yeah, it should be. Come goon with us. I'm an island boy and I jack my brother off. And my dad watches and then we come on papa's face. Whole family involved in our gay sex. I kind of love to find out that Appalachian incest is permeating wannabe hip-hop retard culture.

Well, they kind of just speed ran the new generation's trajectory where you get famous online for being a retard and then you resort to an OnlyFans porn career because there's no way to monetize your fame that you stumble into. I guess we got to fuck our family members. Yeah, they did Aaron Carter's whole life in two years.

It's very funny that there will be blood, like shirt sleeves to shirt sleeves, like capitalism doesn't exist anymore. I'm just picturing Daniel Day-Lewis getting to his house at the end of the movie and he's just jerking off in his bowling alley. He's scooting at the alley. I have an unspeakable rage inside of alley. He's scooting at the alley. Taylor's just having unspeakable rage inside of him.

He's scooting the whole movie. He comes at the end. He goes, I'm done. I'm finished. I drink your comtini. This is them on some live stream. Can I please talk? You would have said no.

You're a bitch. You're nothing but a bitch. You guys gotta live it. You can't do a push-up? You wanna eat fake? I don't get it. Oh shit, my bad. What the fuck is going on? The only thing they're slapping is woman. Let me show you this video. Women, you dumb

fucking piece of shit asshole that should be killed. Let me show you. Wait, were you hitting a bitch over money? You abused woman, you fucking faggot. Yo, what was that video? Fuck you.

I mean, they can't just, you know, the nuclear bomb couldn't come quick enough, honestly. It's sad, man. It's so sad. Look at them. I mean, they look like they should be in a Dawn dish soap commercial. They should be in the They should be in the palm

of a lady working for FEMA being scrubbed off as some music plays. Like, ah, ah. Sarah McLachlan. Sarah McLachlan. I mean, it's What's the point?

What's the point? You know, if I found out they died tomorrow, I'd feel literally nothing. Yeah. But that's just crazy. Is that what the kids watch? Like three people on screens yelling at each other about gay sex and hitting women? This is what Arch, if you have kids today, they're watching the Island Boys and they

go, they go, their first words are incest. They go, Daddy, wait, incest. The Zoomer Mr. Rogers is the Island Boys fucking each other. Incest. They go, Daddy, what? Incest! The Zoomer Mr. Rogers is the Island Boys fucking each other. Incest! Island Boys fuck each other. They're brothers that fuck each other, and it's like we all

are yucking it up. That's the new PewDiePie. I mean, every day, it just makes you... Turn into John Wayne by the day. I'm just turning into an old Republican. That's great. It's wonderful.

It's wonderful. I love watching you turn into John Wayne. I mean, I've always loved him. It doesn't necessarily make a John Wayne to be weirded out by twins having gay sex. Yeah, that is hilarious. I guess I'm just a classic conservative. I'm disgusted by incest.

Imagine, all our grandfathers are dead, right? Yeah. Yeah, imagine trying to All our grandpas are dead! All our grandpas are dead! Imagine trying to

explain this to them. No, yeah, imagine Like, that would be insane. Dude, if my grandfather saw Trump win the election, his head would have exploded. Oh, my God. If my grandfather saw the island. And he was a Republican, but if my grandfather saw Trump win the election, his head would have exploded. Oh, my God. If my grandfather saw the island.

And he was a Republican. But if my grandpa saw a president that was like, fuck you, you're gay. Bitch. They got a huge guck. They would have lost their minds. I have the biggest guck. They always thought politicians were supposed to be boring and diplomatic. And they couldn't believe what's going on.

Yeah, they would literally lose their fucking mind lose their mind it's the opposite remember when they showed like king kong for the first time and there was the bug scene and like people were apparently like vomiting in the theater yeah yeah it's kind of like we've revert we've gone full circle like imagine if like an 80 year old man like saw the island boys today you wouldn't know what the fuck was going on no yeah he literally he'd have no clue what's he people people this is the thing this is why i don't care about you and your aliens they're already here they're called the island boys we don't i don't need footage they are putting themselves on cameo that's the best argument you've given me these are aliens yeah yeah they're aliens that's an alien they're blending in somehow but not really they don't blend in they're aliens. It's an alien species. They're blending in somehow, but not really. They don't blend in.

They draw on themselves. They have tattoos all over themselves. They look like mold. Yeah. They're human mold. They're the island molds. They look like the germs from Osmosis Jones. They look like Osmosis Jones if Osmosis Jones is the name of the virus.

No, no. Osmosis Jones is the guy hunting like bacteria and viruses and shit. Yeah. Right. So they're like the viruses. They look like a virus that's in. They're AIDS. They're the AIDS virus.

It's like in the sequel where Bill Murray's character gets AIDS. Yeah. And it's them. Cause I'm just an island boy. Did you know in Osmosis Jones there's like, there was a deleted scene with Kid Rock singing, it was like a Kid Rock cell

and he was singing a song about fucking like a underage. Cause I got AIDS baby. It was like that. When the sun don't shine and you're fucking the star. I got AIDS, baby.

He's talking about fucking a 14-year-old girl in a children's movie. Kid Rock? In Kid Rock. There's a deleted scene in Osmosis Jones where he's talking about having sex with a little girl. Those were the days, man. I was watching a dumb rom-com from 2007. It was not a very good movie. But you love it because the minute it starts, it's got a

14-year-old girl calling her boyfriend a faggot. And they say faggot like three, four times in the movie. No one bats an eye. It was just what it was. Fuck, I forget. I think it was called In the Land of Women. Ida put it on. It was this

retarded movie with Adam Brody and he moves back to michigan he like writes softcore porn out here his girlfriend breaks up with him so then he moved he flies out to michigan to work on his novel and then he like falls in love with meg ryan who has cancer and her daughter is kristin stewart and kristin stewart's really doing the whole kristin stewart thing yeah you know like like It was almost a caricature of Kristen Stewart You know what I'm talking about, Jay? Where it's just constant looking down and putting her hair to the side

I don't know Sort of pouty and moody and pensive I guess you can come over tonight if you want I don't know I don't know, I'm just so deep and dark Yeah, yeah But the movie, the only reason I liked it Because this is everyone sucking drop and like Vag and shit It's like a PG-13 movie, the only reason I liked it is because everyone's sucking, dropping

fag and shit. It's like a PG-13 movie. I'm not kidding. The opening scene to Old School is Wilson gets into the back of a taxi and there's no seatbelt. And he goes, oh, sir, there's not a seatbelt in here. What do you suggest I do? And the taxi cab driver goes, I suggest you

stop being such a faggot. You're already in the backseat. Yeah, that was the days. Those were the days. The heyday. No one was hurt. We had a lot of fun. That was just a funny line. It's like nobody's... No, it's not victimizing a gay person.

Remember in The Hangover when he pulls up and he goes Paging Dr. Faggot. That's a good time. Matters to the goats when the kids dancing to the music and his dad comes in and throws a beer bottle at him, calls him a little fag. Oh, that's hilarious. That's great.

You know, if that word was thrown around more liberally, we wouldn't have the Island Boys. The Island Boys just needed to be called faggots by their dad, and they never were, and so they decided to go make know uh go uh make their bodies into like the shoes of a middle schooler you don't need to draw on your shoes and middle school on your board that's what they look like sure they look like a bored middle schooler's shoes they look like utter shit they read i mean we're completely finished i know the podcast i think

we've done a lot of stuff lately where it's just like we're just fully disgusted by the state of the world. There really is no point. But what are we supposed to do? Why do we have to know about the two guys named the Island Boys that fuck each other? Oh, for our podcast. I know. But even if we didn't do the podcast, we'd be like, did you guys see this Island Boy thing?

Yeah, he'd be sitting upstairs. They're going to bring it up in Congress. It's right after David Grouch. They move this thing aside. The Island Boys are testifying. He goes, I actually, it's top secret. It's classified. And, you know, I'm a whistleblower.

I saw the Island Boys. The Island Boys only fan. They need a confidential skiff to watch it. Because I'm an Island Boy and I fuck my mom and dad i'm an island boy and i come on my brother's face it's like a top 100 hit people listen to it on the bus yeah there's like some nurse listening to it on the bus she has her iphone or cup you know those they make this is the culture it's that fucking, it's this trashy ratchet retards that fucking talk on speakerphone on public transportation.

This is what has permeated everything now. We've made them famous. Make the trashy retard on the bus famous. It's a freak show that no longer needs a ringleader because they

found out a way to get people to stare at them without anybody ruling them. So these guys would have needed a circus to agree to let them in. Yes! Now, the internet is a circus. And everyone is their own master. And they can just be freaks and

monetize it. Everyone's wifi should be called Barnum and Bailey. All wifi across the country should be called Barnum and Bailey. All Wi-Fi across the country should be owned by P.T. Barnum. The internet was a mistake. There's no point in even trying. People

make clips for us. I've made clips. I've made my own videos for a while. It goes nowhere and it's meaningless. It's fucking want to know what people do when they like your video online? They go, ha ha ha

ha ha ha, my phone is so funny. They don't know who you are or give a shit. There is no care for anyone trying or art or you know, you. Nobody cares about you. You work for the phone. you work for the phone you're all you work for the internet they people laugh they go ha ha ha my the internet's so funny you are just a part

of a big thing it's just we're just we're just little fucking we're we're we're little tiny like insects on grass nothing's meaningful meaningful nothing's meaningful you might as well hold a microscope up you know when somebody when they go do you know how many how much bacteria is on your hand and they like they show you with some like whatever it's called the thing a microscope yeah and you see all the millions of fucking little bugs on it that's all we are that's content it's just millions of bugs on your palm. Yeah. It's true. Dust mites. We're mites. Everybody's a mite.

You know? Little sea monkeys. Little sea monkeys. That's the island boys. They probably make more money than us. They have to. Yeah, dude. They better.

Yes, dude. Probably. Should we fuck each other? What do we do here? Yeah. You should suck me and Joey. I'll suck you guys up. I knew that rant was all a lead up to Devin pitching us gay sex.

Devin's like, listen, dude, I'll swallow you. Well, we should. I'll fucking, John. Because he was giving you bedroom eyes like he always does. Yeah, Devin's been looking at me weird for years. You've seen me where he goes, does he ever go like, he'll like watch TV and he'll turn over and Devin's like this.

Do it to the camera. So the people can see. Like watching TV. So the TV is like over here. Dude, the technology hates how gay Devin is. It'll be like, don't look like. I don't do that.

I never do that. That's very gay. Wow. I never do that. You're kind of doing it right now. Look at who does it. Devin looks at you like a wiener dog. I'm an island boy, and I want the big man to fuck me.

I love when Devin calls you the big man. You're the big man. He's the big man. Oh, you got me. Oh, I want the big man. He's the fucking Ramone. Yeah. Yeah, that was great.

So, Joey, how was your little New York trip, pal? It was good. I went to beat my hands here. Fucker Ramone. Yeah. Yeah, that was great. So Joey, how was your little New York trip, pal? It was good. I went to Seattle. You haven't even fucking hit it yet. Give me two seconds. Jesus. I went to Seattle for like a while. Had like a pretty exhausting trip.

Like a lot of drinking and shit running around. Not really sleeping that well. Got back. I was back for like one day. Then I had to go to New York. And then it was like the same thing where it's just like not really. You have. Got back. I was back for like one day then I had to go to New York and then it was like the same thing where it's just like

not really sleep. You have to drink every day. How do you fucking go to a new city and not drink? I mean, come on. It's vacation so you kind of get a pass to drink every single day.

That's what I... But it was for work though. For work. It's not really a vacation. That's funny to be flown somewhere by your job and be like,

I'm on vacation. Yeah, you know, we did do work stuff but yeah, so I don't know. It was fun. and be like, I'm on vacation. Yeah, you know, we did do work stuff, but yeah, so I don't know. It was fun. By the way, I've known you for about, I think I've known you for 11 years. I have no clue what you do.

Yeah. You've explained it to me tens of hundreds of times and it never sinks in. It never sticks. Never sticks. At some point, it didn't stick enough and I was just like, I, because at some point it didn't stick enough and i was just like

i because at some point i was working with chinese people and they were doing something that was like um like a gray area of regulation this was like 10 years ago with it you know uh chinese people were just up to like sort of a scam like a like a pop-up ad kind of thing where it wasn't a scam it's an annoying pop-up ad, and you click it, and then they get paid 20 cents every time you click it. Yeah.

And then I'm sitting there trying to explain it to you, and I'm like, dude, I scam Chinese people on the internet, and then for like 10 years after that, people would be like, or Devin would introduce me like, hey, this is my friend Joey

scam Chinese people on the internet oh man yeah Joey's got the best job in America though honestly it's good for you like I don't have to go to an office anytime you get fired you always get sick of it

and then you mail it in and then you start drinking during the day and then you just lose your job and then you go I don't, I might have to go back to South Dakota. This has happened like 10 times. You've only moved back like twice. The pandemic was basically the main

culprit. That's the only time I've moved back since I've been to Los Angeles. That's true, but there's been a lot of threats. I'm always toying around with the idea of like, because every time I get fired or like quit a job or something and I'm like, I guess I got to find a new job or it's really not that bad to move back to South Dakota for a little bit.

So I keep that in the back of my head as just like a way to be like, worst case scenario, I do that and that's not that bad. Yeah. South Dakota is a Haven for you. It's, it's, it's,

it's a, it's a, it's a escape valve. It is. It's an escape valve. It is. It's like, yeah, it's a safety net. Safety net. Yeah, yeah. You know, you can go there, and your mom's going to have, like,

30 different lasagnas in the fridge. Exactly. Yeah. All my old friends are there running around, drinking, having fun. All your old friends are there. They're all living it up. It's the island in Pinocchio where all the kids are smoking cigars and playing pool and shit.

Everyone's excited. Every time Joey's there, they're like, dude, we got a Jersey Mike's. Dude, the poke. They're all excited. They're like, we got a poke place. That was the best. Our friend Brock sent a picture of his poke bowl to a group text with me and John.

It would impress us. John's like, what is that hillbilly fucking slop? Get that shit away from me. Brock sends us pictures of his poke bowl into a group text with me and John. Like it would impress us. And John's like, what is that? Hillbilly fucking slop. Get that shit away from me. Disgusting. Brock sends us pictures of his poke. It's like, that's goldfish, Brock. All the workers are like Chinese pretending to be Japanese.

Yeah, pretending to be like Hawaiian. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah. Oh, man. Well, anyway, Joey, I'm very excited about this because today the news just dropped hours ago. And as usual, we are correct. We are we here at the Hey Watch podcast. We are here for all innocent men accused of falsely accused of things. And once again, our pal Brian Koberger, his alibi was released today.

And as usual, it's it's what we expected. He was simply taking a drive in the neighborhood the night that the four people were killed. You fucking assholes should be ashamed of yourself. How dare you? He was out driving. This fucking witch hunt against Brian. This poor man. And all he was doing was taking a Sunday stroll.

poor man, and all he was doing was taking a Sunday stroll. I said this so early on into the case where I pointed out that right by the house where the Idaho 4 was murdered, there's a Dairy Queen. There is a Pizza Jack. Yes. There's like all these great restaurants like one block away, and I'm like, who wouldn't be circling that little area? Shit to break it to you but you know everybody needs to go out and get a blizzard every once in a while sorry if four people were

murdered the same night I'm getting my dq blizzard he's thrilling and chilling it's fucking absurd no it's absurd yeah if like okay if getting a blizzard is a worth a life sentence go ahead take me to fucking jail they got a commissary in there. I'll figure it out. I'll make my own blizzards. But here's the story. This happened about eight hours ago. This morning, Brian Koberger's alleged alibi revealed.

And by the way, I want everyone to know the Hate Watch podcast has, we are here, we exist to defend innocent men. And that's what we're about here. Innocent men. Okay? For the first time,

Koberger's attorneys say he was on a long drive alone the night four University of Carolina students were murdered in November. In a new four-page court file, Look at that innocent man. I think everyone, I think the Idaho Four, has anyone thought of this?

They all slipped. Maybe there was a wet spot in the hall and they all slipped and fell. On a pile of knives. They slipped! And then there's some wounds. The stairs are sharp. Kathleen Peterson. Staircases are very sharp. As we know with the Kathleen

Peterson case, which was a fucking owl and it wasn't Michael. Okay? Sweet Michael Peterson. No, not at all. Working on his book, being gay. It was a witch hunt because it was a hate trial because he was gay. Kangaroo court. It's a

goddamn right. You're a goddamn right. Kangaroo court. You live in America, the justice system's one big zoo. It's fucked. It's a fucking zoo. Kohlberger has long had a habit of going for drives alone. Often he would go for drives at night.

Because he's thoughtful and he's an introvert. Because he's our generation's J.D. Salinger. He likes lonely drives. Yeah. That's how a lot of the greatest minds think when they're alone. I relate to Koberger. He goes to the grocery store 20 minutes before closing at night when no one's there because he's nervous around people.

Because he knows people are capable of shit like this. Do you know how terrifying it is to buy chicken breast and asparagus around people? Scary. Sucks ass. Very scary. You've got to go 15 minutes before closing. terrifying it is to buy chicken breast and asparagus around people scary sucks very scary you gotta you gotta go 15 minutes before closing if you're nervous and sweet like co-burger that's that's a fucking daunting task again look at his eyes those are kind eyes folks soft cute little features we've been behind this case for fucking months on end we broke the case co-burger is an innocent man

and I'm going to buy his car and I'm going to fucking give it back to him when he's found innocent. I want his sheath as well. I'm going to give that back to him because I don't know who stole it. Because he uses that sheath to crush garlic. Exactly. He uses that knife.

He pulls the knife out of his sheath and all he does is crush garlic and he makes nice shakshuka or stews. He might make a nice stew. That's what he uses that knife for. Sorry, folks in court. I know none of you can cook, but a lot of us own giant 12-inch knives to cut meat and to make dinner for people, for women, for the Idaho Four. I heard he was there and he was making a nice, delicious meal.

If he was there, he was cooking for them or something nice like that. Yes, of course. Look at these young college kids. They don't know how to do basic things around the house. Why do people jump to murder when four people are killed in the same place that he was next to? Why would anyone jump to that conclusion?

It's sick. All we do is we eat our own in this country. We eat our own. Oh, what if that was you? What if you were taking a nice Sunday stroll in a neighborhood where four children were killed? Oh, is that you?

Are you guilty of that? A good man falls with these monsters. Oh, so what? He was listening to the Serial podcast while he was driving around getting his DQ blizzard. It's a popular podcast. Oh, so what? So what? People say that he had his laptop open and he was watching Zodiac on it.

I love Zodiac. That's a real indictment of his character. Zodiac was great, Robert. Who doesn't? Driving around watching Zodiac. Yeah, that's a real indictment of his character. Zodiac was great, Robert. Who doesn't? Who doesn't? Driving around watching Zodiac. Who doesn't drive around Idaho watching Zodiac eating a D-cube lizard, sharpening his blade? Who hasn't done that? Anytime I'm in Idaho, I sharpen my blade.

It's if you look. Sharpen my blade. I love blades. I think a dull blade is considered like one of the biggest sins in the state of Idaho. There's nothing worse than having a dull blade. Exactly. Because in Idaho, they don't know shit about seasoning.

And they don't use enough garlic, and they don't use enough onion, and they don't use enough spice. Paprika, if you will. Sure. And Coburger, he's a chef. He's a chef. That's a chef. Fucking, it's unbelievable unbelievable so let's get back to his alibi but it's just I'm so sick of

this you know it's just another innocent man thrown to the wolves if they don't let him go after this I don't know I'm at a loss for words if they don't let him go after he explained what was really going on he told you he's driving around let him out how he explained what was really going on.

He told you he's driving around. Let him out. How do you not let a murderer off when he lies about what he was doing? You gotta go with the lie, right? Yeah. I don't know what... Joey! I think everybody that's on trial...

Sure. Yeah. The first lie they tell, we should run with. Give me another example. Yeah, yeah. OJ. OJ wasn't there. If you have the balls to lie about it, let him off. It sounds like you're saying Koberger might be guilty there. No, no, no.

My brain, I don't hold two conflicting thoughts at the same time. Because it sounded like you were saying he's guilty in that. So I just wanted to clarify. We don't think that. No, he's not guilty. But even if he is, if you lie, that's good enough that you're not guilty. All I need is to see what you say. Bottom line, guy's a sweetheart.

He's got a nice. He's a fucking sweetheart. Look at his hair. Look at his suit. He's too young to put away. He's got many more He's a fucking sweetheart Look at his hair Look at his suit He's too young to put away He's got many more people To be around To hang out with

To be around Cook for Hopefully he fucking Cook for You know Maybe he'll be Near the Island Boys soon That'd be sick

Right? Cold River versus Island Boys Listen I'm an island boy And I killed the Idaho four That'd be great If the judge was like Listen I'm an island boy, and I killed the Idaho four. That'd be great if the judge was like, listen, I'm sentencing you to live with the island boys. That would be a worse punishment than Superman.

That'd be a worse punishment than being sentenced to Rikers. Yeah. So let's see what his alibi is, this innocent poor man. Late on November 12th and into November 13th, 2022. But beyond that, the defense didn't reveal much more in the alibi is this innocent poor man. Late on November 12th and into November 13th 2022 but beyond that the defense didn't reveal much more in the alibi adding Mr. Kohlberger is not claiming to be at a specific location at a specific time. There is not a specific witness to say precisely where Mr. Kohlberger was at each moment around the time the murders took place. They wanted to comply with the rules not be precluded from an alibi defense,

but give the state as little as they possibly could so they don't have to reveal their death. Am I really supposed to believe these legal analysts? This guy's got an AirPod in. He's fucking listening to Billy Joel while speaking. He's not even... He's probably listening to This American Life. Hey, why don't you turn off Piano Man and pay attention to the trial?

Hey, asshole, turn off This American Life and fucking focus on the case, scumbag. Look at that stupid fucking typewriter he has in the background. It's possible corroborating evidence of the alibi could be provided by witness testimony during the trial that's scheduled to begin in October. Koberger is charged with four counts of first-degree murder for the deaths of... Oh, sick. It's disgusting to hear about. ...Zana Kernodle and Ethan Chapin, an Idaho judge entering a not guilty...

Sweet little man. Look at those eyes. No one with those eyes could hurt a fly. He's a deer headlight. We've said it for years. He's got kind eyes. Yeah. Why don't you focus on these two in back of him?

Look at these two scumbags. Look at this guy. Look at this guy. Eyes are... Like a baby Huey. They're dark as night, their eyes. Koberger's got lovely hazel green. These two scumbags, these bald neo-Nazis in back of him,

why don't you ask where they were on the night? I like your alley. Koberger was simply trying to get a Reese's Pieces blizzard. Bullshit. Look at that fucking car! Look at that fucking car! That slick motherfucking

car! A month before the murders, Kohlberger was pulled over by police, seen here driving alone. Yeah, wondering what's going on. Wondering why the world is after him. He's being targeted. Yeah, Elantra. He ran the red light.

Following the killings. Oh, wow. Well, he's so spaced out. Yeah, it's a huge crime. A red light. Are you kidding me? Also, I bet he didn't do that either. He probably ran the red light

because he was trying to get his sick grandmother to the hospital. It was yellow. It was yellow. And it was probably yellow. Investigators focusing on a similar color seen near the crime scene the morning of the hospital. It was yellow. It was yellow. And it was probably yellow. Investigators focusing on a similar color seen near the crime scene the morning of the murders. If he was driving

around in a white automobile, that's part alibi, part not an alibi, because the state is saying that he was driving around in a white automobile. Now, the next time we're going to see Kohlberger in court will be August 18th. That's when his defense team is expected to push

to get the judge to dismiss the grand jury. It's sick, man. It's sick what they're doing to him. Disgusting. I hate it. You know? And the Island Boys walk free. Yeah.

It should be illegal to fuck your brother. There's laws against that. Is there laws against this? Are the Island Boys facing any charges? They should be illegal to fuck your brother There's laws against that Are the island boys facing any charges? They should be They need to get I mean honestly they should be blocked up And they could maybe be forced to fuck each other in prison Because there's some island boys

And they come on the face of their mom I think I was fretting out the whole family now Island boys bring the cousins in to our rape dungeon. Yeah. I'm an island boy. Island boy. And I fuck my family. I'm an island boy.

And I need a hip hop beat. I don't need some banjo from Deliverance. I'm an island boy. Yeah, they're like hillbillies. Play the island boy. Yeah, they're like hillbillies. Play the trap beat. Yeah, they're Miami hillbillies. I love that hip-hop's being invaded by incest. I feel like that's a thing that's been happening for a while.

Kevin Gates said he fucked his cousin. You don't know who's your cousin in the hood. You know what I mean? Yeah. That's the thing. You don't know. I watched all, there's tons of videos. A guy's been like, oh, I'm fucking my cousin.

I fuck my sister. Are there tons of videos of that? Dude, there's so many videos on it. Really been like, oh, I'm fucking my cousin. I fuck my sister. Are there tons of videos of that? Dude, there's so many videos on it. Really? Yes, dude. Damn, dude. There's like lots of videos about that. About guys in the hood fucking their cousins?

I can probably find one right now. I feel like you, yeah, okay. Guys in the hood fucking their cousin? I don't know. I feel like you almost seem like the- That raises? You almost seem like an agent for incest. An agent for-

The result of incest. Yeah, you kind of seem like the Ari Gold of agent for incest. An agent for... The result of incest. Yeah, you kind of seem like the Ari Gold of the hood incest. You know, I think it's just more like you don't know who your cousin is or you don't know who your... You're trying to normalize it and get people to be like, hey, it's not that crazy. Exactly.

I think John's got an idea. It's not that crazy. I think John's got some weird ideas coming up. You know, I want to... For a while, I want to bang my, you know, dad. Oh, my God. Because John's an island boy and he fucks his dad. Your girlfriend's a beard, isn't she?

Yeah, it's a little beard. It's a princess beard. There's no longer... Being gay is too normal now. You need a princess beard. You're going to bring her over to Thanksgiving. You're going to fuck your whole family and walk her out. Why am I getting deja vu right now about incest jokes?

I don't know. Fuck. Maybe we've done this before. We've done... Almost definitely. We've done a hundred incest jokes. There was a Robert De Niro movie where he was fucking

his whole family. Robert De Niro? Yes, we were making jokes about that in your living room. Do you remember this? Robert De Niro had a movie where he fucked his family. No, we made the joke

was that he was fucking the whole family. Oh, no, no. No, it was the family who fucks each other. That was the name of the movie. It was the family. It was the family.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Oh, yeah, the family and they all fuck each other. No, we also were making jokes about the great movie 310 to Yuma. Yeah, the family. We also were making jokes about the great movie 310 to Yuma. Oh, yeah. In the movie, it's Christian Bailey has one leg. He's got a

peg leg and he's kind of like a cock father. And the whole movie he's like, I'm going to save my family's ranch and I'm going to take this criminal to the 310 to Yuma for you know for $500 and it'll save my ranch. The union paid me 50 cents

for my rage. And his son like hates him in the movie his son's like you're a fucking cuck dad fuck you dad. Yeah. And the whole movie John and I were watching it we kept making jokes like when he like sends his dad off to like go you know take Russell Crowe to the 310 to Yuma

where Christian Bale says to his son his dad off to like go you know take russell pro to to the 310 to yuma where uh where christian bale says to his son he goes you you fuck mom good okay you make sure to fuck mom and the kid keeps going like i fucked her better than you won't be too hard to fuck her better than you dad well that was that was a thing better than you made dad. Well, that was a thing. I fucked mom better than you. I made her come three times last night, faggot. It was also like the littlest son, he would leave

to go to the barn and be like, don't you go fucking mom now. Yeah. Barely mom alone. Barely mom alone. Because then the kid

shows back up in the middle of the movie, in the middle of the journey where Christian Bale has taken Russell Crowe to the 310 to Yuma. The kid tracks them because he's like, he doesn't believe his dad is capable of handling

it on his own, so the kid shows up. He's like, the cuck needs my help. And the first scene, John and I were like, he's like, and I fucked mom better than you last night, dude. And Russell Crowe's like, oh, your boy seems to have a bone to pick at this point. Your boy's real strong.

Russell Crowe's like, I'm going to let y'all handle this. He's like, I'm going to repair this relationship by the end of the movie. Ooh, I love this video. Ooh, I love this video so much. This is what John's been saying. Why don't you set this up, John? You've been saying this for a while now. You don't need to do...

After this, what you're about to watch in the video, nothing else needs to happen. Yeah. This incident is over after this. You don't need... There doesn't need to be an arrest. After this, what you're about to watch in the video, nothing else needs to happen. Yeah. This incident is over after this. You don't need, there doesn't need to be an arrest. There's going to be a guy in the jail. Right.

Just nothing else has to happen after this. Anyways, play the video. And for the people listening, what we're about to watch is a Indian store owners that really, really give a shit about the AMPM that they work at. Fuck yeah, they do. They act like it's their AMPM. It probably is. I guess it's their franchise.

It's probably their fucking AMPM. Maybe they bought that franchise. So it's being robbed, and these guys are yelling at them, and this guy's robbing it. Also, this is the worst robbery. He's just stealing cigarettes and nonsense, and then they fuck him up. Here we go. Watch this shit.

Why are you getting heavy? Why are you getting heavy? I'm going to put my strap on your bitch ass. Why are you getting heavy? and then they fuck him up. Here we go. Watch this shit. Let's go, Raneesh. He doesn't have a gun. No, he doesn't. He doesn't have a gun. He's a bitch. He keeps going back to like a harmonica in his back pants. Might have a knife.

Yeah. Well, the fake reach for some reason. It's a knife, I think. By the way, it's the worst robbery ever where he's like, yeah, I'm going to sell these views pods on the black market. I'm going to be making about $32.87

after this shit. Motherfucker. Motherfucker. Motherfucker, you don't know. I'm going to be rolling in it, motherfucker. I got a $3 margin on these bitches. Man, you Hindu motherfucker, you don't know how fucking baller I'm about to be. I'm stealing seven packs of light blue American spirits, motherfucker. I'm about to be a hood king.

I'm hood rich, bitch. It's like, dude, you're making no money on this robbery. Like, at least go to the register. He's not going to the register. He's stealing, like, shitty, like, he's stealing zins and fuse pods. He's stealing nothing worth anything. Dude, you know you're fucked up and retarded as a thief when you're

stealing things that already have deals above them? Look at this. Save $2. Buy three for $11.50. You're stealing things that already have deals. He's a crackhead, man. They're going to sell anything. He can sell anything on the black market.

He's a crackhead. Look at his dirty-ass shirt. He's a crackhead. He's. Is he a crackhead, though? He's a crackhead. If he was a crackhead, he wouldn't... Look at his dirty-ass shirt. He's a crackhead. He's a lowlife. I don't know if he's a crackhead. He's a lowlife. What is it, 1930? He's not a crackhead.

He's a lowlife. He's a goddamn wino, Johnny. He's a lowlife. He's also the fattest crackhead ever, if he's a crackhead. No, he's not fat. I don't think he's a crackhead. I just heard... Play the video.

I want to see this fucking guy get wrecked. There's nothing you can do. Yeah. But there's nothing you can do. No, he this fucking guy get wrecked. Yeah. No, he's about to do something. Yeah. He goes, I got about ten packs of Marlboro Lights, motherfucker. Dude, there's something they're about to fucking do.

Oh, yeah, they're about to do some shit, buddy. They're about to do some third world shit. What we all should be doing. He looks like a crip in Doom. I know you can do that. I know you can do that. I know you can do it man. I know you can do it man. Shut the fuck up.

This cock behind the camera. I know you can do it man. Don't do that. Get him. Get him, Singh. Get him, Singh. Yeah! Yes! Oh, shit. Oh, they start beating the shit out of him with a big stick.

Yeah. Welcome to America, cocksucker. Yeah! Yeah! This is John's America right here. Get him. Get that, cocksucker. Oh, fuck, dude.

Yeah. No, keep playing it, dude. Yep. Keep going. By, fuck, dude. Yeah, keep going. No, keep playing it, dude. Yep, keep going. By the way, for the listeners, they're beating the shit out of this dude with a giant stick. These two, are they, what are they, like Indian or just Muslim?

This guy's not dying. No, they're just hitting him. They're beating his legs with a giant wooden club. This is street justice. Nothing's getting broken. He's going to walk out of there with some welts. He'll be fine.

He's going to scream a lot. It's very painful. He's never coming back to that 7-Eleven. He's never trying that shit again. Let him go. This is a better punishment than if they called the police on him and went to prison for a long time for theft.

Yeah, they'd kill him. Take the trash bag back. Put the shit back on the wall and let him go. Yeah, you want to be beaten with a stick by a guy named Jigrat. Yeah, go, same, go. Beat his ass, thing. Yes, beat his ass, Shimkrat.

Shimkrat. Beat his ass. Pour some boiling hot Pollock Paneer on him. Beat his ass. Fucking get, dude, yes. Look at them go, dude. I can't believe Sikhs give a shit this much about yellow American spirits. They are willing to almost die. This guy kept acting like he had a gun and they still didn't care.

Amazing. They're the only people that would give a shit on this level. Yeah. They're the only people that would give a shit on this level. This is what should happen. Yeah! That's a broom, bro. You you know what i love those men uh let's find let's find out which 7-eleven that is i didn't see any menthol booze pods on the on the counter so i think it might be in california

buddy i'm gonna say i'm gonna say norcal i'm gonna say oakland and uh i don't know where it is man we're not gonna be able to find that out. I mean, these are the comments. Let me read these comments. We're not going to be able to find it out. Let's see some liberal bullshit. People are posting videos of a white guy trapping an eagle.

What is this? Whoa. Oh, it's like a white guy capturing a seagull. This kicks ass. Holy shit. Oh, my God. Wait.

He goes, hello, you little fucker. Hello, you little fucker. Is he going to rip his head off? Yeah, is this guy going to rip the head off of a seagull? These girls are screaming. He's taming the bird. Shut up, bitch. Let him go. Shut up, bitch.

Seagulls are the fucking... They're the criminals of the sky. Yeah, humans kick ass. I'm surprised that video with the seaks wasn't involving a seagull. Seagulls are thieves. Yeah, they steal all your french fries and your ice cream. Don't hurt the bird.

Let him go. Don't hurt the bird. Shut up, bitch. He's feeding it. He's feeding the seagull. This guy's amazing. Don't hurt the bird. Get a body.

Get a body. This guy's amazing. I was going to eat the birds. What the fuck? Somebody get me. By the way, though, people that touch strange birds are insane. Yeah, that's how we get baby flu. Because they have so many diseases. Yeah, they're disgusting.

It's insane to just touch a strange bird. Well, this guy kind of, he's like bleeding in some parts of his body. He's not. This guy's completely, he's a complete drunk. His thermos is full of bourbon. Oh, yeah, no, this makes sense. He's a total maniac. White guys are crazy.

What is happening? He's got like a real... Who's the guy who rode on the road? Jack Kerouac? He has a Jack Kerouac vibe about him. I don't know. Good for him, though. Yeah, great.

Great job, buddy. I love how he really fucked up uh the people's reception of him i don't know why this is in the comments of the beating of the man at the at the liquor store but whatever he seems like a great guy but yeah man yeah i don't know um yeah don't fuck around don't fuck around with indians don't fuck around don't fuck around with people that have worked their whole lives to own a really shitty store. You know? Immigrants keep America great is the tweet.

You damn right. Yeah, they do. You damn right. Did you guys see the autistic guy that is an autistic reporter for a news channel? I'll play. Please. Have you seen this? Oh, God, yes.

Check this out. Reporter Michael Falk joins us now with his interview. Nice to see you again, Michael. I cannot see you, Brooke. I can only hear you. Right. Okay. This is a character you've done. I finished speaking with Brian Wasserman 26 minutes ago, and I've been

standing here since then waiting for you to talk to me. That's fake. You think it's fake? It's an Onion character. It is fake. You think it's fake? It's an Onion character. It is? Yeah. Well, such an honor. What do you want to mean? Such an honor.

I can't sit there and let us pretend react and look like it is. Somebody sent that to me. Somebody else fell for it, too. You have to, like, vet these things. Is that really a... It's an Onion character? He does, like, it's a whole Onion series. So the Onion makes fun of autistic people?

That's sick. Oh, this is hilarious. This is so fucking funny. Have you seen this? This is crazy. This isn't fake. This is the glory of white women, okay? White women will just... They will ruin their lives over anybody.

Bad sucker! Fame fucker! So it says, what happens when you get pregnant on vacation and marry your Nicaraguan kayak guide? And so this white woman, she went there, she got impregnated by her kayak guide in Nicaragua

and now she's just raising the kid and lives in Nicaragua. And, uh, yeah. Leave me dry like a goddamn vampire. By the way, at the end, did you notice how much shittier she looked? How much fatter she looked? Yeah, she was just like, okay, I can get as fat as I want now. I'm going to take the first opportunity. Wait, hold on.

It was a new post by Kayla of a day in the life of a single mom? Is that her? It looks like it, buddy. Hell yeah, hell yeah. In the life of a sad single mom. This morning I woke up and made myself some toast when I noticed this tab was still on. This morning I woke up and I was beaten by his Nicaraguan friends.

Oh my. So I just tossed it on the counter where my husband used to leave it. That's when I noticed the counter had been wiped clean after my last meal. So I decided to sprinkle some breadcrumbs in hopes of attracting a new husband. I also noticed that... She already hates him. She already hates the Nicaraguan baby daddy. Is this for sure her?

And she's trying to attract... I think so. All my cups were in the cupboard. So I decorated my empty nightstand with half-empty water glasses. Then I went to the washroom and noticed this toothpaste cap was still on the container. Who needs bathroom decor when you have this? After that, I head to the kitchen to dry off some dishes. I may be retarded, but...

Okay, Dev. This isn't crazy. All right, we'll... Oh, that's good. Let's distance ourselves from fucking Herman Goebbels over here. Herman Goering, excuse me. It's a type of thing where she thinks she's being exotic

and she thinks she's being actually... Maybe she just fell in love. She didn't fall in love. She's miserable. She's talking about putting breadcrumbs on the... This is like a weird sketch or something. All right, David Duke. She's talking about putting breadcrumbs on the table to get a new husband.

She already regrets her decision to have a baby with a Nicaraguan kayaker. You know, you're getting real close. You're getting close. What am I close to? Let's explain. You know, back up whatever you guys think. What is crazy about this? So you're saying, like, you shouldn't.

I think love transcends races and cultures, and I think it's okay even if there's a class disparity no i'm saying kayaker can fall in love with a nice the kayaker no no exactly here's the thing here's the thing she's retarded she's being subtly racist she's being subtly liberally racist the nicaraguan kayaker's like yeah i don't know i just this white bitch like had sex with me one night and that fuck now she has my kid and now she's like pretending she's like in love with me but yeah but i don't i don't i don't have any stake in this i'm in my own country i didn't come to america to like find some white bitch this lady is being racist in her in the idea that she is fetishizing

another, like a black man or a Nicaraguan man or, for lack of a better word, an exotic man to have her babies. He gives a lot better words. Why? Exotic does sound like you're Why, exotic sounds awesome.

It sounds like you're fetishizing. She is. Exotic men like African Americans. You're abusing that perspective, exotic. You could have gotten to a really interesting angle here. You think she's a race traitor? I can go down this.

No, no, no. I'll play ball. I'll play ball. Listen, racist John will play ball. I'm not saying she's a race traitor. I'm saying... I'm saying in a situation like this, I'm saying in a situation like this,

she's actually racist for how forced this is. It's very forced and lame. I think a lot of young women. She's not just naturally with a black dude or anybody in America of any other culture or race. I don't give a shit about any of that. I was obviously goofing. Yeah, we're goofing. I'm saying she feels really good about herself,

and she kind of feels like she's flipping off her dad. She probably hates her dad because he used to like to fish or something. She's probably like a retarded liberal, like beyond a liberal, where she thinks her parents are assholes. I don't think she has to do politics. There's got to be a concerted one to do this.

I think what happens is it's like, okay, I'm a 22-year-old white chick from fucking Ohio. And it's like, okay, I'm going to go to Nicaragua. And instead of sitting there and learning about the culture and doing all this stuff, I'm just going to get impregnated by white sock suckers. Because she thinks it's racist to abort the baby that she accidentally had with her kayak guide in nicaragua it's probably not it was like a reverse i'm not a bad person i have to i'm i'm married to a nicaraguan man when she's when ultimately the story is i'm a massive white whore that fucked my fucking canoe

guide in a south american country yeah she's a retard and she can't go back home and because she's been so consumed with american politics and ideology she thinks she'll be looked at like a racist if she doesn't go on with having a kid with somebody that she just let nut inside of her on a hasty trip to Nicaragua. I think it more has to do with her parents abandoning her if she aborts the kid. And the most racist thing about

her is she's posting about it online. It's a really, it's a brag to her. She goes, hey look everybody, I'm a fat white bitch and I went to Nicaragua, and I'm having a kid with a kayak guide who's Nicaraguan as well. That's going to end horribly. I think it's hard for white women to just be cool.

Like, they can't just be cool about it. Yeah. They have to, like, make a big thing and be lame. It just sucks ass because they can never be just like chill about like having like like i think if it more has to do with instead of like she's like oh i can't it's like great it's i think it has to i don't think she's virtue signaling by having the baby i think she's afraid to go back home and tell her parents who she still sucks on their tits all day and who pay for a car payment and her apartment but you know apartment all that shit it's probably harder for her to be like hey

i can't i you know, I have to go back home and if I don't have this baby and don't marry this guy, they're going to stop paying my fucking phone bill. I don't know about any of that. I'm going to assume that. The simple fact that she's made viral videos about it is suspect. She fucked the first tour guide she met on a vacation.

She made an irresponsible decision of committing her life to this guy she doesn't know. Probably a huge language barrier. She just, yeah, she was like, it was a very irresponsible decision. Regardless of any race. By the way, Joey, what I'm saying is, who even knows if it was an accident? She's being racist

by posting about it and making content about it like it's not something that just happened. I don't think she's being racist. That don't know if she's in a race. I think she's just being lame. That could just happen if you fall in love with somebody on your trip. It doesn't matter who, any creed, race, cult, whatever. It doesn't matter.

But it obviously matters to her because she's posting about it. She goes, she's making videos very well edited about her. I think even if you fall in love with somebody that fast, first time you meet them, you get fucked, you get pregnant on the first shot,

I say do a plan B and then hang out for about a year. Have another baby for real if you still love each other. I mean, that's just never going to happen. Like, she would have never, if she didn't fuck this guy and he didn't, like, come inside of her, that would have been the end of the vacation. And that's exactly why she shouldn't have done it.

Yeah, but that's the thing. You're about to get cut off, you cocksucker. This is my goddamn menthol pods. You're done. You print in New York. You promised to get me more. You come back empty-handed. Now you expect to hit my vape every three seconds?

You should be ashamed of yourself. And I see it. He's got the sad Doshan look in his eyes right now. He's looking at mine now, too. I'm taking them off the table. You're done, buddy. You fucked up. Okay?

It's time to face some consequences here. Okay, pal? I'm not sending you money for next week. If you want to hit, you have to admit you did something wrong. I'm trying to wake up here. I can't fucking wake up today. you did something wrong. I'm trying to wake up here. I know. But you have to admit you did something wrong.

You made a mistake. You guys just acted like I was like fucking, you know, I was like Calvin Candy for making a point. We were goofing. We'll go along with the point here. We're goofing. We're trying to make a point. We did.

We actually went along. It is funnier. It is funnier. But you got to understand, you promised me menthol vape pods. You've been promising menthol vape pods for months now. Joey was just out there. He didn't bring you any. But he didn't promise me any.

I didn't promise you. I said, I'll see. And then I- No, you promised him. And then Connor- You'll see. When I was hanging out with Connor in New York- But he forgot his wallet.

He was like, oh yeah, Devin says he's going to buy you guys all this stuff. Connor hit me up on Instagram. Yes, it is. Connor hit me up on Instagram. I swear to God, everybody heard it. It was like a big goof. Everybody heard it? There was a whole group of people that heard it. Nobody else heard it. Yeah, I swear to God, the whole group heard it. And then I was like, yeah, everybody heard it. It was like a big goof. Everybody heard it? There was a whole group of people that heard it.

Nobody else heard it. Yeah, I swear to God, the whole group heard it. And then I was like, yeah, never saw those. What the hell are you talking about? All the people we were with heard it. Connor was the only one. We were in a circle. No, this dude, Napoleon.

What? I've never met a guy named Napoleon. What the hell are you talking about? Napoleon email. He's a fucking really funny comic. His name is Napoleon email? Email. He's a fucking really funny comic. His name is Napoleon Email? Email. And he had a Kobe jersey on, and he was funny as hell.

There was a dude, Ryan Donahue. I was going to meet those guys when I was out there. There was a guy, Gavin. Good name recalling. I could never do stuff like that. I heard you shit all over Gavin. We were goofing on him a little bit. I heard he actually was getting angry. I heard you like shit all over Gavin we were goofing on him a little bit I heard he actually was getting angry

I heard this Connor texted me he goes dude Gavin was like telling stories and they were really long winded and boring and Joey was drunk and Joey kept being like Gavin buddy where's this story going pal Napoleon Napoleon started joining in

he goes hurry up buddy he goes what's the point here, pal? And then Gavin would be like, no, no, no, no, sorry. I think our wires got crossed. I think the wires got crossed. That's why you didn't get the story. And I'm like, yeah, you're going to blame it on that. And then Napoleon, and then he'd start back up,

and Napoleon is this fucking cool six-foot-five black guy that just fucks a million chicks. And so Napoleon started just going like this fucking sucks dude that's a great bit to do when somebody's it sounded like joey really like killed it out there yeah but don't think i'm subject you made a promise here the subject is You made a promise I didn't make a promise I said I'll try

You made an oath To a friend I want you guys to know When I went out there I was at We I took a Connor always takes his dog

On walks right Okay So I left with Connor The last day I think Yeah And we went on a walk And I It wasn't the last day

I think And then It was one of Someday And I went He went into a smoke shop to buy a vape. You saw a river with a bunch of clams. I go, do you guys have those Views menthol vapes?

And the guy pulled out a bunch. And I was like, hell yeah. And I was like, oh, fuck. I didn't bring my wallet. My pockets are full of clams. I don't have my... My pockets are full of barnacles, clams, and sea anemones. I don't know what to fucking do.

I made the attempt. You know what? I'll fucking fly out there next week and I'll buy them for you. You guys shut the fuck up. Bullshit. You're not even trying to pin me as a racist over that fucking bullshit. How dare you both? How dare you both?

It was a goof. Devin's not racist. Devin's the least racist guy I know. Devin has the most genuine connections with other races. You're making it sound worse. I love humans. Devin doesn it sound worse. I love humans. Devon doesn't see... Devon loves humans.

Only color Dev sees is green and purple because it's the color of sea anemones and shit. Exactly. Like an otter only detects the colors they need to... Color of sea anemones? Anemones. The little spiky things that you eat. You break them open, you eat the meat inside.

Cool. Big word. Anemones. You know he looked you eat the meat inside. Cool. Big word. Enemies. You know he looked that up the other day. What's otter terms? I was on the otter Wikipedia. Going through the whole ecology. You made a vow.

You made a vow. You were just in Seattle, retard. You didn't get me in Seattle. I was expecting my buddy to get me a bunch in New York. You guys obviously don't care. You guys don't give a shit about me. I actually don't care. Joey was just out there.

He didn't buy any. I was sitting in Seattle. I was sitting pretty, and I said, you know what? I'm actually not because my good friend Devin, there's no way he'd ever fail me. He made a vow to me. He wouldn't lie. He would never fail me. I'm going to come back home to boxes and boxes.

I didn't make a vow. I said I'd try. By the way, how much work do I got to do? I got to do the work on the podcast, and I also got to help your nicotine dependence, too. I'm helping your nic. By the way, how much work do I gotta do? I gotta do the work on the podcast, and I also gotta help your nicotine dependence, too. I'm helping your nicotine dependence right now, shitbag. I don't have a nicotine dependence. I'm just doing it to fucking snap into focus a little better,

because it helps focusing. Yeah, it's like caffeine. It's like caffeine and a smoke. It's unfortunate. You know what? You know what, you motherfucker? You motherfucker, you. You can have it as much as you want. I just want to know where you fit. Oh, I can't?

Is that why you keep taking it out of my hand like a scumbag? To remind you of your failure. Fuck you. Fuck you, you fucking queer. You're going to get a mental. Next time you're on, big apple. Here, hit it. I'm an island boy, and I fuck my dad.

I'm an island boy, And I fucked my mom. I'm an island boy. And I came on the face of my brother. And we are having fun tonight. We're having fun tonight. Oh, look. We made a billion dollars last night. I love how Devin said, these guys probably make more money than us.

Have you seen the chains on their necks? Like, yes. Yeah, of course they do. It's crazy. You know how much, when you seen the chains on their necks? Like, yes. Yeah, of course they do. It's crazy. You know how much, when you look at a guy who has a sleeve tattoo, just know that guy,

instead of buying a new Camry, he bought a horrible, he bought a horrible tattoo on his arm. Yeah. Isn't that crazy? When you see a guy that has an incredible sleeve tattoo, you go, why didn't you just buy a Camry? You love decently

priced vehicles. I love a decently priced vehicle. I love MSRP rates. MSRP? I love shady power and associates. You're on Kelly Blue Book. I'm filtering by four doors a day. That's all I do.

He has the car max. Every fucking weekend. I go on Kelly Blue's all I do. Devin's Mecca is CarMax. He has a CarMax every fucking weekend. I go on Kelly Blue Book all the time. I just jack off. Oh, shit. Do we have an ad read? Oh, we do.

Oh, this is a special one. I have an ad read, too. Do you actually? Oh, do you? Yeah, as a patron. He, yeah, I have an ad read. Oh, yeah? For a wonderful man.

All right. David Collins' 30-minute half- wonderful man. David Collins 30 minute half hour show. David Collins 30 minute half hour show. That's right. David Collins 30 minute half hour show featuring great

guests like Andy Fiore, Katie Burke, and Cardiff Electric. Never heard of these guys. Hey, Joey, relax. And soon to include Joey LaFleur and Jon Knopf. Oh, is that the Juggalo? David's firing from KMKF hasn't slowed him down a bit. David's been known as a bit of a hot interviewer,

so you know you can trust this is a place you'll only get the facts. Wow. If that's the Juggalo, I apologize. And maybe even a well-timed joke. Check out David Collins' 30-minute, half-hour show wherever you find podcasts. How much do they pay? And email the show, dc30minutehalfhour at gmail.com.

Okay. How much do they pay? He was hitting me up for a little bit, and I was kind of against it. I didn't want to do an ad, but I was like, I don't know, 300. And so I got 300. 300, that's pretty good. Not really dragon drink money, but you know.

That's David Collins 30 minute half hour show. Check out David Collins 30 minute half hour show. That guy, I was doing a goof against Devin trying to like trash that guy. But he's actually really good. He's been a long time listener for a while. He's been a long-time listener for a while.

He's a very good guy. Is this a two-person? It's a one-person. Go for it. Usually we do a two-person ad for this, but somebody sent me a message last time, and they were like, hey, you know what might be funny?

Is if Matty Ratt wrote your next Dragon Drink ad. And so I just messaged Matty Ratt, and I said, would you be interested in writing a Dragon Drink ad. And so I just messaged Matty Rat and I said, would you be interested in writing a Dragon Drink ad? And he said yes. And so this is written by Matty Rat and here we go. Matty Rat has a,

he paid you guys to do it? No, no, no. So Dragon Drink paid us, but somebody had the idea to make Matty Rat, not make, to ask Matty Rat if he would write the next ad read

for Dragon Drink. Yeah. Godsmoth might be angry. It's very gay. It's about shoving Dragon Drink up your ass and shit. But so this is written by Matty Rat. This is not from John Rise.

This doesn't reflect our beliefs or ideas. We've all given Matty Rat way too much power. That is not fucking true. Matty Rat is so talented. God bless Matty Rat. Matty Rat should be the producer on the show. If anything, he's given us too much power because he's more talented than all of us combined. I'll believe that until the day that I die.

He's got a deep-seated mental. Oh, yeah. So do a lot of the... So did fucking Pablo Picasso. Yep, Van a lot. Oh, yeah. So do a lot of the... So did fucking Pablo Picasso. Yep, Van Gogh. Alright. Okay. Matty Rat. When I need the energy to bear every last one of the great warriors

of the Caucasus Mountains, I down a can of Dragon Drink. The caffeine can keep me awake for days, taking the virile seed of every last man ready to conquer my body. Be in top fighting shape to conquer or be conquered with Dragon Drink's B vitamins. They promote rejuvenation, so you'll never have sloppy seconds energy. Finally, with taurine, you'll be able to endure the longest and strongest of the Caucus Mountain men.

Whether you need the alertness to edge for days like Devin, or the endurance to take the most brutal fistings like John, or you just want to look well-rested and energetic like Joey, Dragon Drink will help you on your conquest. Dragon Drink energy. Thank you, Dragon Drink. I don't think Gosbot's going to fucking like that. That was Matty right.

I said this is not, that doesn't reflect Dragon Drink. This doesn't reflect Sean and I. I don't think they're going to like that shit. They're fucking daggist. Dude, Dragon Drink doesn't care. By the way, is this a bit? No. Are you guys running a bit?

Well, why do you guys have to keep doing, what do you, I do official... I do official ads and they don't keep making me do them. Yeah, Joey's doing Joey shit where I think he's actually going to fuck up Jar Jar Ackender. That was a real... No, but you guys don't... They didn't authorize it. No, this is dumb. You're going to fuck up our awesome sponsorship. We worked really hard to get it.

It's not an awesome sponsorship. It's $600 for three. People can't even find... You guys have done way more than three, so we're done. Now we're just fucking... No, it's not. No, we're not going to stop. Because we're trying to build a relationship. This is going to fuck

our relationship. I'll be fully honest with you. I've seen commenters too. I saw a comment that was like, yeah, of course it's a bid, and it fucking sucks. I hate that bid. They paid us $600, you fucking dumbass. Yeah, but if they only told you to do three, you don't have to do any more than three.

Well, we want to get like pallets of dragon fruit. So what's weird is I haven't heard back from them since their website crashed. They don't even exist. They're going to be so fucking pissed. They died in 9-11. Like a long time ago. Oh, God.

Don't say that. Figure it out. I thought you knew how to do it. I don't know how to do it. I'm asking for help. Be a good friend. This looks funny as hell. Great pick. Hey, LA Beast here.

Who is this? You're off the show now, Devin. Stop. Wait, hold on. There we go. Oh, John, you didn't pick the right video. There we go. Hey, LA Beast here. Hell yeah. This is a classic you didn't pick the right video. There we go. Hey, Elite Beast here.

Hell yeah. This is a classic video. This guy's fucking hilarious. He has a Pepsi? Crystal Pepsi. Oh, those are from like the 90s. He's drinking a 20-year-old Crystal Pepsi. Oh, wow.

Where'd he get that? He got it off of eBay or some shit. He's opening it up. Yeah, this doesn't happen if you have Dragon Drink, by the way. Yeah, keep promoting a company that hasn't paid you in months. You cuck. Oh, he smelled it. You American cuck.

He's like, this stinks. Let's go. 20-year-old Crystal Pepsi. That's nuts. That's insane. He took a sip of 20 years old and you took a sip? Fuck yes. He's chugging it? Let's insane. I love his shirt. He took a sip of it. 20 years old and he just took a sip? Fuck yes. He's chugging it? Let's go.

It's the best fucking video I've ever seen. It's hilarious. How'd you find this? It's been in my pocket. I've had a cocktail loaded for years. Look, he chugged it easily. Oh my god, dude. He's amazing. This is wonderful. This is so nice. Look at him. He's amazing! This is wonderful. This is so nice.

Mm-hmm. Look at him, he's let go. Oh, he's sick now. He's sick. Oh, Jesus Christ. Is he okay? He's fucked up. Oh, God.

He's throwing up. Oh, my God. Oh, my God. That was amazing. Well done. Let's end it on that. That was something. He really hated that.

Hey, dude. Hey. Yes. Good shit. Oh, watch this guy, too. Tourette's guy. Remember him? Oh, hell yeah. Let's end it on that That was something He really hated that Hey dude Hey The fuck is this good shit Oh watch this guy too Tourette's guy Remember him Oh hell yeah dude Watch him on the Patreon

He's like fuck Anyway Alright Hey watch podcast On her Patreon Patreon by the way Is some of our craziest Episodes

Motherfucker Mother Motherfucker! Motherfucker! Yeah, the Patreon is where everything's at. Yeah, we're going to get gnar-nar on the Patreon. The Patreon's where we get really fucking buck wild. I get messages all the time where it's like,

hey, the Patreon, you guys are like, why don't you do this on the real one? Well, we can't. I have people that go like, I'm a fan of you guys but only on Patreon well the Patreon's much sloppier but they like the realness they like the realness

of course they do and I get it but we can't we're on YouTube on the real one I'm just saying these guys don't understand how this fucking works

it's like we say the naughtiest things they don't get this weird like tap dance that we have to do when we do public episodes so it's like it has to be like

half ballsy half like just having fun here yeah and i have to piss and shit so bad right of course you do of course you story of your life story of your life all right let's take it over to patreon all right yeah