Hate Watch with Devan Costa - Plain View Doctrine
Episode Date: June 10, 2024Godzilla, schizophrenic guy that punched all the women in New York is running for Mayor, mentally ill man likes to burn toys, guys getting maced https://www.patreon.com/HateWatchPodcast ...
Transcript
Discussion (0)
It's good to be in something from the ground floor. I came too late for that. I know
But lately I'm getting the feeling that I came in at the end
The best is over
Many Americans I think feel that way
Moving people into shanties. So yeah, John's really excited about a fucking
Great depression, which is sick. You're a sick man. You know me families will suffer because of that
There's a lot of guys blowin' their heads off.
But you don't care.
Yeah, I don't give a fuck.
So you think literally we're gonna have a point
where money is meaningless in three years
where people, it's gonna be like Germany,
it takes a wheelbarrow full of money
to buy a loaf of bread.
We're gonna be in bread lines.
Yeah, it's gonna be fucked.
China's gonna invade Taiwan, we'll be fucked.
That'll be cool.
Won't we just be like, we'll play a big game with like,
hey don't invade Taiwan, and then when they do,
we'll be like, nah, whatever.
No, they're gonna do what they want.
They're gonna rock the fuck out of Japan and Korea.
I'm gonna go Shanghai, number one.
John, I know you joke, or you talk in such a manner.
I predict it's COVID.
Yes, I understand, I understand.
You were lucky with that.
No, that was all knowledge. Well, there was things happening you understand. I understand. You were lucky with that. No, I was that was all knowledge.
Well, there was things happening.
You actually were looking at spread.
It was like a Bruckheimer character, like tin foil on my head.
And I was predicting covid.
Do you genuinely believe that?
Yeah. What you just said?
Yeah. No, the Taiwanese straight.
Is that why you live like those are like a hapless rate?
Yeah, because there's no point in anything.
How is China's military?
Because like the last thing that I heard maybe maybe it was from you, because you're the
guy that gives me this info, I don't look this up.
I believe last time you told me their military was like still not even close to the USA.
It's not even close as far as naval power goes and Air Force, but like they're going
to have a merchant fleet basically.
So they're going to acquire every boat they could possibly get their hands on and come
either I think it's spring or next talk. It's either it's either October or spring. They're going to that's one of the
Monsoon season has a lull in the Taiwanese Strait
They will sail across that motherfucker and they will invade Taiwan and we just fucking shoot planes
Not really. Yeah, I don't in 20 odd years. We're gonna be at war with the we're gonna fuck them up
But then they're gonna push us back with the Chinese. We're gonna fuck them up,
but then they're gonna push us back to Guam and Australia.
Micro processes.
Yeah, micro processes.
In this country you don't bring
automatic weapons to a business.
That's really fucking good.
That's good.
All right, I dig it.
Jelly kicks ass.
That was really good.
Say get this IRA motherfucker out of my bar.
Yeah, somebody get this IRA, no, you ruined it.
He goes.
No, no, no, this is your fault. Your fault. No, no, no, no, this is your fault.
Your fault.
No, no, no, because he got the quote wrong.
He goes, who let this IRA motherfucker into my bar?
Pretty good.
Yeah, we're all gonna be,
there's gonna be an entire generation of Americans
that's killed on some random island in the South Pacific,
some 20, you know, some faggot lieutenant colonel
wants them there, it's just gonna be great.
I actually, I'm ready for it.
I got, I don't own anything.
I'm ready for war at all times.
Yeah, I don't know.
I'll just kill myself immediately.
Well, I think you'd be a Chinese killing machine, low key.
If you wanted to be.
Honestly, Connor, if you really fucking wanted to do it,
you could fucking do it.
Why would I do that?
Because you're jacked and you're Irish and you're angry.
If they could tap into your rage,
if there was some kind of wise general're if they could tap into your rage if there was like some kind of like wise
like general like go into my brain and get rid of like the like a reasonable like you know voice in my head and
Just cut that out. Let's pump you full of propaganda
You know there you know there is like a weird there's like a connection here to how John talks about this was such glee
because
Because you know you
do want there to be like a justification for how you've lived your life for like
me 31 years yeah you want like a war to break out and you want everyone to like
be fucked so you can like you can be like who the see told you I've been
eating my own calm I've been fucking like hands like people like walking
around like skid row I have fleas and like fucking that's what I say
I have a motorcycle and I don't give a fuck you're gonna look like pig pen from the peanut gallery Just bugs jumping off you your stomach's gonna be in a wheelbarrow. You're like told you guys
Called it. Yeah, you like hot your stink lines. They're gonna see where we're hidden
You always say it in such a happy way the next 20 years something insanely dramatic isn't gonna happen on the global scale.
It's been that way since...
No, I'm stupid.
Yeah, no.
It's insane.
Roll on it.
Look at the first turn of the century.
But like insanely dramatic shit's kind of always happening.
Okay, so what happened?
It hasn't not happened.
What happened?
Yeah, what hasn't happened?
It's caught up in 1908, right?
World War I breaks out, right?
This is this whole thing, like you really want, like you love war because you like really I don't love try to make a prediction
I understand war every hundred years. There's a shift
Just what happened in 1808 1808 okay 1808 was actually the Cherokee Wars and before that was the revolution
So it's always like give or take like 20 30 years, but the thing is is like there will be a massive global conflict
like 20, 30 years, but the thing is is like there will be a massive global conflict If I was a betting man, as a betting man, Joey
So you look at past, past, you know, what do they call them?
Uh, fucking, uh, you know, things that just happen over and over again
Patterns
Patterns, look at patterns
Wow
Oh wow
Look at patterns, the patterns say
Patterns, patterns, great, And what's my name again?
You're John, John, John, John, yes.
What's that word for when there's other things involved?
Fucking Joey, Joey goes, and.
Yes, and.
World War I and World War II are pretty much the same war,
if you look at them from a macro perspective.
So like, we're about to enter another global conflict.
It's 2024, we're due for it in the next 10 15 years
I think it's gonna happen the next five years
But you know, it's just we're already gearing up for we get Ukraine happening
And the thing is people people look at you 500,000 people die in Ukraine. That's not something fighting non-stop
That's a hundred. No, that's a hundred times more than Vietnam
Red cabbage versus green cabbage you give
Red cabbage green cabbage who gives a shit? Red cabbage, green cabbage, who gives a shit?
It's more like, you know, but that's a intense war
that's happening.
Just think of it, that's an artillery war.
Guys are getting taken out by like shrapnel and shit.
It's not, it's cluster bombs, it's just.
It is bad.
No one thinks about it, you're right.
Ukraine war is a proxy war though.
It's like a fake war that we're running
and we're using it and Biden's president.
Nothing's fake about all the day
As far as proxy
I think it's John honestly the most intense proxy war the 20th century was the Vietnam War and 10 times more people have died in
The Ukraine in the Vietnam we've lost in the Vietnam War. It is it is the most insane proxy war that's ever happened
If if it was 1938 and the Ukraine war was happening, they would consider that in it
We gotta get all these Ukrainians some pot.
And they start going like,
Hey man, hey man, I see a freeway off ramp
with my name on it, man.
I'm gonna come back, I'm gonna-
Have you listened to CCR yet, pal?
Hey man, hey fuckin' the doors, man.
CCR.
You heard of the doors? Jim Morrison, man.
Jim Morrison, man.
You're so excited about everything ending.
I'm not excited, I just know it's gonna happen.
It's gonna make us all stronger.
Yeah, but you are excited.
You do, you talk about it.
You can't deny the tone in your voice
when you talk about these things.
You don't really ever talk about things in a,
like a, I don't know, about things in a,
I don't know, what's the word, fuckin' a pattern, no. Passimistic.
You don't talk about things in a,
this is just simply how you think it's gonna happen.
There's always an emotionally charged,
you kinda can, I always feel like you want something.
There's a bias.
And then you do live your life with no hope.
No, my life is tough.
And I also feel like you do that on purpose because you're like,
dude, we'll fucking, I feel like you're like sucking off a homeless guy.
You're like, who fucking cares, dude?
We'll be at war with the fucking Chinese in three fucking years, dude.
Go ahead, fucking cum in my mouth.
Put the gun to my fucking head.
It's a justification for having sex with homeless.
It's a justification for your shitty weird life.
You both couldn't fathom the amount of hope that has. You guys don't understand, do you? It's a justification for having sex with homeless. It's a justification for your shitty weird life. Full of fleas and cum guzzlers.
You guys don't understand, is it?
You couldn't fathom the amount of hope that...
Yeah, hope is what makes us human.
You have no hope. You talk about wanting to have kids, you talk about this whole future,
and then you go like, dude, we'll fucking be at war with like fucking Taiwan.
Well, that's because your small P brain can't comprehend that with fucking, like, with sadness.
There has to be yin and yang to life, right?
P brain? You couldn't come up with the word pattern 10 seconds ago.
That was a brain fart. That's that's a brain?
Yeah, maybe he's got a work. He's a great diarrhea
Brain is digesting. He's got a little brain worm. He's got brain fart. You're an absolute swine anyway, so
Get that gas fatty from your medulla oblongata. That's not wrong part of the brain
The wrong part of the brain someone that controls your part of the brain. That's not fair. Wrong part of the brain. Someone that controls your...
It's a part of the brain retard, shut up.
Wrong part of the brain.
You're getting brain from your boyfriend anyway.
So...
Yeah.
I got you, Pack.
Anyway, so...
That was not good.
Yeah, it was.
It was great.
It was really funny.
Joey gives you a kitty laugh.
No, no, stop.
Stop.
When great darkness happens, such as a global conflict,
there always is an equal and opposite reaction with light.
And there is always amazing amounts of hope and courage
and associate with those things.
So I'm looking forward to that.
You sound like the whale right now.
I've never seen it.
People are amazing.
War is amazing.
War is amazing.
So like why though?
What happens?
Like fucking, just cause China invadesades Taiwan we have to like ruin the world
Yeah, why would we ruin the world over shitty Taiwan? I mean, I like peanuts in my like noodles and shit
It's not Taiwan it's the Pacific Ocean
I don't really get it
It would have to be like hey China you're gaining too much power. We kind of have to do something
Then it escalates and Connor McNutt over there and then they release not with a with one of those stationary guns yeah but he can carry it because
he's so strong like Rambo Rambo for cutting dudes in half
your ripping throats out of Chinese guys. The new Godzilla actually really kicks ass by the way.
You didn't pay attention to the fucking movie. I saw it already dipshit. Yeah but you said Ben
was talking through the whole thing so you didn't get to see any fucking movie. I saw it already, dipshit. Yeah, but you said Ben was talking through the whole thing,
so you didn't get to see any of it.
No, I still watched a lot of it.
I was expecting you to watch it with me.
I still watched a lot of it.
Devin hates, like, there's like a whole part
of the Godzilla movie where he has like a romance
with this woman that he saved a baby with,
and Devin just checked out.
Don't give a shit.
Devin can't even pay attention.
It's just crazy, because he loves grounded everything.
When something grounded and romantic happens.
Yeah, but that was corny like Chinese cinema ground.
They were, they were.
I know, but come on.
You're all so. Japanese dudes are so gay on every front They were, they were. I know, but come on. I don't know.
Say it, say it.
Japanese dudes are so gay on every front.
Like every time they're angry, they're like.
There's a couple scenes that are really like funny
where it's just like, he like yells at Godzilla
cause he's like, cause he thinks like his girl
just got like killed by his radioactive like powers.
And he looks up and he goes.
Eeeeee, gaaaaaay, eeeeee.
And you're just like, yeah. What'd he say? radioactive like powers and he looks up and he goes EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE EEEEEEEEE EEEEEEEEE E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E for Asian drama. But man, I don't understand that. And black people apparently, huh, John? Hey! What do you mean by that?
Huh?
Both of you just, what's the N word?
What did I say?
When you listen to this later on,
you just said the N word twice.
Oh, it is Japanese.
And I said,
Eee-ah!
No, he's changing it now.
I didn't hear it.
What are you guys talking about?
I think you guys say that on the brain.
I heard it.
The ear hears what it wants. I literally am so confused right now. I speak to you. I didn't hear it. They're trying to force like
Podcasting
Difficult difficult to be around simple
Force a narrative. It's like sad. It's like, you know, it's like you're trying to protect yourself
You know, the early have that. I had no clue what you guys were referring.
The, yeah, no, but they're very emotional people.
But like an emotional and like a really weird,
they're very stalling and like,
oh, well the samurai,
they do actually say the N word a lot in Japanese.
And I think it means like Chinese.
And I'm talking about Godzilla in Godzilla.
They're like speaking.
There's like one word for black people. There's like one word where it's not for black people. It's like, it means it's their version of. In Godzilla, they're like speaking, there's like one word. They have a word for black people.
There's like one word where it's not for black people.
It's like, it means like perhaps or something.
That's Chinese and it's um.
They keep saying.
That's Chinese and it's um.
They don't say it.
I'm not saying Chinese.
No, but they say that in China.
Godzilla was Japanese, and there's a word in the movie
that sounds like the N word.
Get it right, you idiots, after getting it wrong.
I mean, I don't know, when I was in China,
they were dropping N bombs left and right. They say aniga. Yes, I know that. Yeah, it means I don't know, when I was in China, they were dropping N-bombs left and right.
They say, aniga.
Yes, I know that.
Yeah, it means um.
I know, in Japanese, in this movie,
there's also another word they kept saying that I forget,
but it was like, oh, they're saying the N-word here and there.
They just are, they're calling Godzilla the N-word.
Yeah.
Well, they really fucked with Godzilla.
I'm sorry, by the way, I saw Godzilla,
I go, I started to think this is like a fuckin' analogy
for the fuckin' atomic bomb. I don't sorry, by the way, I saw Godzilla, I go, I started to think this is like a fucking analogy for the fucking atomic bomb.
I don't know though.
Yeah, I've never heard of it.
But I don't know.
But I didn't give it a lizard.
But I don't know, Jerry's still out.
It was only made in 1950.
They really fucked with Godzilla in that movie though.
Like the way they decided to kill him.
Godzilla's like a huge retard in the movie.
He's so dumb.
He's a fucking damn bull in that china shop.
The guy moves his tail, he destroys half a city.
It's wild.
God's also just keep going, oops, oh fuck.
Yeah, God's, what if he was like trying to be dainty
and be like, I'm sorry, I'm just,
guys, get out of my way.
Oh God, this is so embarrassing, I'm sorry, guys.
Oh fuck.
I'm gonna make my way right out of here, I'm so sorry.
Oh, turn around.
He's trying to get to the hill.
Oh, was that an entire town?
Oh fuck, my bad, god damn it.
Oh, no, and you guys just had the bomb dropped on ya.
He goes, ah, and you're Asian,
this is the worst day of your lives, holy shit.
The way they try to get rid of them, though,
it's really cruel and fucked up.
They think they just like-
You know what's not, you kept saying this,
it's not cruel.
No, it's weird, it's very Asian.
Godzilla killed 30,000 people.
No, but I feel like Asians love beating animals to death.
And they couldn't just hit it with a nuke.
You know, they couldn't just fuck it up.
You're acting like they're Chinese.
Japanese are much more, they like animals more.
Isn't he nuclear?
No, okay, so this is what happens.
Yeah, he has radioactive.
They have one plan.
They have one plan where they're going to shoot Godzilla
to the bottom of the ocean where he's going to
So the pressure the ocean could kill him and then they're gonna shoot him up with like a trampoline
Shoot him up with the trampoline, but then he eats
With a giant mallet
Big bump comes out of his head birds fly fly around. Well the thing is, at the end they realize
that didn't work and at the end they just fly a plane
with a bomb in its mouth and then it blows his head off
and that's how they get rid of Godzilla.
Why did they just?
No, but he was already really weak from the pressure.
Yeah, why did they just hit him in the head with a missile?
They weakened him with the pressure.
They weakened him and then blew his head off.
Hit him with a bunch of missiles.
No, it's the-
They did a million times, he like regenerated.
Maybe you were watching.
It's the Rocky method, you know?
You gotta tire them out and then one final punch, you know?
The whole movie also was like weird Japanese propaganda
where it's like trying to be like,
everyone's disappointed that this guy
failed his kamikaze mission.
He was a kamikaze pilot.
He was a kamikaze pilot,
but he like pussied out at the beginning.
So in the whole movie,
when they're talking about killing Godzilla,
they're like, you better die.
It was very pro-kamikaze. It was actually very sick. at the beginning, so in the whole movie, like when they're talking about killing Godzilla, they're like, you better die.
It was very pro-Kamikaze, it was actually very sick.
It was pro-Kamikaze propaganda, it was awesome.
But then it isn't, because he lives.
Spoilers, but who gives a shit?
Fuck off.
It's fucking Godzilla, who gives a shit?
Like last year, fuck you.
Well, you don't know.
By the way, there's a big dinosaur in it.
There's a big lizard guy in it.
Does Kong show up at any point?
No.
Fuck Kong, dude.
I love Kong, leave Kong alone.
Those movies are awful.
The new ones suck.
I like the one in Vietnam.
Skull Island. Skull Island.
Skull Island's pretty fun, yeah.
I liked that a lot.
But yeah, Kong and Godzilla going toe to toe,
it's terrific.
Well, they had to make Kong huge
to make him fight Godzilla.
Yeah.
They made him way too big
Yeah, King Kong's only supposed to be the size of like fucking like three school bus. Yes, King Kong is a big goddamn ape
Big monkey
Gorilla never seen a gorilla that size till I saw those movies. I go what the who the hell?
Hey Roger, even over here with that. That's my review.
I'm sitting next to Cisco.
Cisco's going like, what the hell? Who the hell?
Cisco's going, then you? Are you drunk?
You show your sobriety chip, you're like, having a drink in ten years.
That Peter Jackson King Kong movie was great though.
I do like it. Which one is that?
The Jack Black one. Oh, I like that.
That was a very good movie. I saw that movie a lot in theaters when I was a kid. I saw it like four times at theaters. I was like it. Which one is that? Jack Black. Oh, I like that movie. That was a very good movie. Yeah, I saw that movie a lot in theaters when I was a kid.
I saw it like four times at theaters.
I was like obsessed with that movie when I was a kid, dude.
That was a long movie.
I kept going with my friends.
I liked it a lot, yeah.
It was like four hours.
It's a long fucking movie, but I love it.
And the Universal tram ride section of it.
So sick, dude.
The first half of that movie is honestly
just really fucking good and scary.
And then the second they go back to New York, it's like, fuck it.
But like the Skull Island shit.
I like when they go back to New York.
I think the Skull Island shit was amazing.
Sean goes, I hated the best part.
The best part is when they're on this terrifying island, these crazy natives,
and there's like velociraptors and giant bugs and they're running around with machine guns.
It's fucking awesome.
The worst part of that movie is when they're all running.
And the CGI is really bad against the awesome. The worst part of that movie is when they're all running
and the CGI is really bad against the cliff.
The brontosaurus is one.
One of my favorite facts about Godzilla, King Kong,
is that in that Naomi Watts movie,
gorilla penises are so tiny that to scale,
that size Godzilla could have had
consensual normal sex with Naomi Watts.
What?
Yeah.
That's crazy. His penis would have been appropriately sized for. Right, she could have taken it. Yes. She could have had consensual normal sex with Naomi Watts. What? Yeah. That's crazy.
His penis would have been appropriately sized.
Right, she could have taken it.
Yes.
She could have taken it.
It would have been fucking like any other guy.
Yeah.
No.
Do they have the smallest penises of any man?
What's that hug?
What's a gorilla penis?
What does a gorilla penis look like?
We can show that on TV.
No, I don't think so.
Yeah, of course.
On Patreon.
Well, this might be public so.
This hat, this is Patreon.
You can look up a gorilla penis on...
No, this is Patreon. It's scientific this is paid you can look up a gorilla penis on now this again
This is paid. It's scientific
Gorilla penis there's no pornos a gorilla. No, he's fucking a girl. There's a horse penis
I think would be a little bit in danger zone, you know, I think so
Scaled up horse cock would like fucking you could break up skyscraper with that. Yeah, I got a little tail exactly
You can't even see it. You can't even see it.
It's a pussy.
It's like a pouch.
You have to type in...
Wait, what did you search?
Gorilla penis.
Wait, that's his finger.
That's his tail.
It's like that.
You can't even see it.
It's like a clit.
Do you have like some safe search settings?
That's what I'm saying.
They must have very shallow vaginas.
That's what I'm saying.
If King Kong was the size he was in that movie, He could have just fucked Naomi Watts, which is very fun
I think it would have still killed her it would have been a penis like this
I mean the force of him pounding her
Would have just broken her into the rock
Dragon Ball Z fight if he fucked her they have micro dicks He's like floating in the air just Vegeta slamming into a mountain. I gotta say I just saw that
I saw this guy in a movie
Planet of the Apes
Well now it's a patreon
No, it's not Joey. He's talking about a literal girl. Oh, well, that's makes that's like the worst observation of all time
Yeah, how's the point? Oh, it's a chip chippers
Actually confused by I missed it
I'm a brilliant comedic
Sometimes it goes over your head, you're a simpleton, you're a simple jack, and I'm killing it right now.
Type this, gorilla penis to scale.
Yeah, to scale, interesting.
Gorilla penis to scale Godzilla.
Or just to scale.
Yeah, to scale penis.
King Kong, King Kong.
Not to Godzilla, you sicko.
Oh, that's the way too big for Naomi Watts.
That's way too big.
There's no way that's true.
That was drawn.
That is a good illustration.
I think that's fake.
Gorilla penis to scale, let's see.
And then say versus.
That's a chimpanzee.
That's the biggest cock on a chip ever.
Look at the big balls on Harambe.
You know why they made David's penis so small?
Because back then, large penises were seen as savage.
Shut up, faggot.
Yeah, no, small penises were like seen. Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha I'm done doing it. I keep getting too drunk. I call it John a faggot. I don't feel a thing which is scaring me actually but
Well, you know, there's no way that's true.
I feel happier
There's a point to life now
I'm sober now
I'm no longer shaking
I know that's what you mean
Devin do this, gorilla penis, human penis comparison image.
Image.
Like you're searching on Google.
Yeah, well no, but image,
I think that's gonna make the results better.
Nothing comes up.
No, well all those graphs, Baba.
This is a paint, this is a Garela.
That's me, dude, in the morning.
Dude, you can't see their dicks.
Look at me, that's me getting out of bed
and having a bunch of sardines on toast. Their dicks are-
Scroll up, you got some fucking like safe search.
No, I don't do safe search.
You kidding me?
Me? Safe search?
What the hell are you talking about?
No, they don't show gorilla penises, dude.
There's one.
Look at that, it's just a pouch.
It looks like a kangaroo.
Look up Cherokee Dash.
Cream pot.
It looks like he has a fucking hernia.
Gorillas just look like they have hernias.
Devin, shut up.
Go to pornhub.com, type in gorilla fucking.
You guys.
You guys don't respect apes.
I do.
Dude, I love ape.
But anyway, I thought Godzilla was interesting to me.
I liked minus one, whatever that,
what does that mean, Godzilla minus one?
I think it's because they got rid of the first one
and then he's coming back.
They're really good at math so they just fucking, you know.
Yeah.
They're like figured out, round out.
Divided by three.
Godzilla two, abacus.
Very good, very good.
Hey, I'm catching what you're throwing out there.
Hey.
Very good, John, I love you.
We good guys.
I love you all.
Oh, oh.
I don't feel any effects of this at this point.
I'm only telling my friends I love them.. Oh, I don't feel any effects of this
There's another one upstairs and I might take a little down the sneak up let John take the I'll take BJ Penn highlights You love you by the way, that's like not good and it's bad
I still got some of this but yeah, okay
Talk about Conor McGregor versus okay and learn. You know, let's do this
continue to Fucking retarded. Let's talk about Conor McGregor versus Michael Chandler. Let's do this. Continue to invest.
Wait, well.
Don't leave us with your trash.
Is that your answer?
I'm pretty sure.
I'm pretty sure.
What?
So this is the guy that has been punching
all these white bitches in the face in New York.
Ha ha ha ha.
Why'd he get that way?
Yeah, cause they're bitches.
He's the king of the night.
I hate white women.
I'm a little sick of people living in New York
and not dealing with some of the New York stuff,
which is that occasionally a wacky guy with schizophrenia.
This is a Seth Rogen take.
Is, well sometimes if your car gets broken into,
they leave a little gift and you wanna go.
It's called life in the big city, dude.
You wanna go, who Who's they Seth?
It's like parts of my fucking pottery sometimes a fucking guy
Fucking he'll break into your car and he'll leave a knife and it's a fun little gift again
Jesus Christ you better get started on an urn for your career.
But it's when you start crafting a fucking urn for the ashes of your fucking of your integrity and your humor.
What happened to him? What a it's sad.
Go. He blames everything on on racism. Everything is like everything's like if everything's a fucking if you smoke non-stop pot for that long
I think it just finally start it starts like okay. You're now
Just get afraid for your career
And then you you're writing a show and you hire a bunch of like you know young queer people
And then they talk to you and you're like oh fine realize that's well like what young people were talking about
Yeah, and then you are like that's the movement and you got to keep up with it
and then it fucks you eventually because they became victims to like that one period of time where like everything was about like being like
Queer and gender politics and stuff like that. Hey, you double down cuz of Franco. I think it's for sure
It's very weird. I saw it happen in real time. Yeah, I remember him talking to me man like
Saying the whole thing about like let's get retarded
Mm-hmm with the black eyed peas great song and he was like he's like they say retarded like a lot and I was like
It was better when it was let's get retarded yeah, you're like Seth
It's almost like they watched like 40year-old Virgin and stuff like that,
were inspired by it.
Yeah, I wanna be like, so your whole,
you know how I know you're gay scene,
what are you guys saying?
Is it wrong to be gay?
Hey Seth, kill yourself now, I guess.
I guess you need to kill yourself.
Because you've done bad.
You've done bad for the world.
You made gay people feel bad.
Kill yourself, Seth.
No, if everyone wants to repent, let's all do it.
Blow your head off.
What do you think was the most,
I think the most infuriating thing
that comes up constantly on Twitter and stuff
is every time Ace Ventura gets brought up
and there's people being like,
just a reminder, Ace Ventura is incredibly transphobic.
Right.
And you're like, shut the fuck up.
Right.
Jesus Christ.
Just a reminder, not every asshole that talks
is sarcastic and an asshole, okay?
That's so mean.
That's so rude.
That guy who talks out of his ass
and is best friends with animals is actually transphobic.
Cool, cool.
It's a dumb, silly movie.
That's very funny. I love that. Ace Ventura Pet Detective is amazing
Yeah, trans people even transphobic. Yeah, like when a trans person's fucking another trans person
Aren't they like a little annoyed if like the dick isn't like up to par
Like a little pissed off if they're like fucking of trans woman and they're like well the pussy's I think they like that
They're like this pussy this pussy stinks. I go, hey, what's what's there?
There's no, what's the timeline?
It's like, wait, it's like waiting on a passport.
It's like waiting on a passport.
Can we expedite this thing into a real pussy?
Like, yeah, what is going on here?
They're transphobic too.
They are.
I'm not afraid.
No one's afraid of a trans person.
We love trying.
It's when you're in the bedroom with them.
John knows this.
I listen, I'm a huge fan.
I just hate them.
You pull the pants down and you go,
hey, you're a woman, you have fake tits, this is great,
I'm into you.
And you pull the pants down and there's like a weird,
there's like a growth down there.
You're like, what the hell?
Who the hell, what is this?
You call a doctor, there's a weird growth down here.
What's a growth?
Call a dermatologist.
Jesus Christ.
You got a dick- shaped tumor on your pelvis.
It's time for you to use some Sarave.
Hey Chaz Pono, I'm trying to suck a stranger off.
Where's your cock?
No, I don't, who's actually like afraid of a trans person?
They're people.
They're everybody else.
I think when you-
You're afraid of them in the bedroom
because they have fucking crazy shit going on in their pants.
It's not finished.
It's an unfinished job.
It's a botched job.
Jesus Christ.
No, that's the transphobia, right?
You hear the scat?
That's what I guess is the public episode for sure.
Yeah, right.
Exactly.
This is public.
This needs to go out.
The people need to hear this.
I don't understand.
No one's actually afraid of a trans person.
We have sexual desires for trans people because we're not trans who's we who's we all do
I don't know
We're liberal good people here, so I would fuck a trans person
It's just like you got to get that pussy pay you got to get that dig, right?
Cuz I'm bi when it comes to you guys. Yeah, I would never fuck like a man or a woman
You mean you meet a trans girl and you go,
your parents better be very rich.
Yeah, that's really, honestly being trans is like,
is like affording skiing once a year.
Absolutely.
It's crazy.
It's got so much money to do it right.
All the hottest like trans women that are so hot
that they're like, that looks like a really hot chick
Yeah, that is from a rich family. That is a fun kid. Yeah, and they started doing yeah estrogen when they're for exactly. Yeah
It's a train. I look at trans people that have done it, right? I'm like wow you must be like a country club person
Yeah, and but so that's we're not being anti-trans. We're saying that I'm talking about how
we're saying ugly trans women are or men are because they
were poor. Not even. And so poverty made them ugly. Yeah.
You look like David DePappé if you fucking. It's a class
issue. Yeah, it is. It's a class issue.
Absolutely.
You end up like David DePappé or you end up like, what's her face?
So the man that's been accused of punching all these white women in New York, he's running
for mayor or something like that.
So let's check this out.
They attacked in a city.
According to the NYPD, there have been a dozen reported incidents in the past two weeks.
One of the men accused of punching a woman was in court today for prior similar crimes.
CBS News' Alice Gaynor was there and spoke with him.
I was literally just walking and a man came up and hit me in the face.
Last week, Skaboukie Sturgeon was arrested for allegedly randomly punching a 23-year-old
woman in the face on 7th Avenue near 17th Street.
Did you punch that woman last week?
Look at this guy kid this guy rule. He's like he's like you trying to get some too or what?
He goes, you know what? I'm accused of right bitch. You want the D
What's his fucking tie? It's kabuki star. That's his fucking tie size? It's Skaboky Starrer, that's his name.
Damn, he's got a tie.
Did outside of the courtroom Wednesday,
did you punch that woman last week?
I'm running for mayor.
And also ran.
Did he say that?
That's his response.
I would vote for this guy for mayor.
Did you punch that woman?
He goes, nah, I'm running for mayor.
He goes, once a day a snow bunny needs to know what's up.
He goes, once a day in this city of New York,
one snow bunny needs to get hers.
He goes, sir, sir, seriously,
you're on video punching a woman in the face.
Show up to the polls.
No, sir, it's a horrific crime
you've committed across the city.
He goes, my platform is,
it's a purge on white woman once a year
Everyone in the city is legally out to hit a white woman in the face. I would vote for him. He's cool I know harpy rules. I love this guy loves skimpy
Cameras were not allowed
Interrupted the judge saying I feel my rights are being violated the judge replied
I can't control how you feel but your rights are not being violated
The judge replied, I can't control how you feel, but your rights are not being violated. Stora was in court for three open cases.
What a gay response to that.
The NYPD says he has a history of similar assaults and has been arrested several times
in the past.
He's the coolest guy on earth.
The NYPD released a statement saying, he's black.
Send him away.
Look at those glasses, dude.
He's so fucking sick.
He looks like he just killed a million vampires.
He rules.
Yeah, he's Blade.
Exactly.
He looks like Blade.
Six months, other women have been posting online.
He looks like he's about to collab with alchemists.
Wait, really?
Yeah.
All these women got attacked by him?
Yeah, dude, he was fucking them up.
He's got a type.
He's the best in the game.
He's got a type.
I mean, a lot of these women look like they could use like,
yeah they all look annoying.
Well it's cause they're all fucking puffed up
from getting socked.
They're all puffed up.
Being online about being randomly punched
on New York City sidewalks in recent weeks.
Oh, he didn't even hit her.
That was a no look jumper dude.
Come on, that was nothing. He barely touched her. Look at this, he doesn't connect hit her. That was a no look jumper, dude. Come on, that was nothing. That was two for flinching.
He barely touched her.
Look at this, he didn't connect.
Look at the reach.
There's no leg power in that.
Look at the reach.
His wingspan is insane.
That's a jab.
That's some Draymond Green shit.
It's like, let him be.
In recent weeks, in Court Wednesday,
a prosecutor noted the other allegations being investigated,
but said when it comes to Stora,
there is no evidence that connects this defendant
to the other so-called viral assaults. But sources say he remains a suspect in several other cases.
The NYPD says there's been 12 reported incidents recently and half a dozen arrests. Two other
suspects have also been identified. The NYPD released video of another man who they say
punched a woman in the face on March 20th.
It shows him running down 6th Avenue.
A woman is walking along by herself, a male exits a McDonald's and unprovoked punches her in the face.
She receives a broken nose.
Police say the majority of the incidents have been occurring in Manhattan South or Midtown and below.
As for Stora, he filed a motion to represent himself.
His lawyer said he was fine with it, but it was denied by two judges Stora will be back in court
Okay, so then skippity toilet is now he's running for mayor
Duties fucking jack to
Me, Governor Skaboky, Walkin' Jack to...
I'm battling the Republicans
and the Democrats, Mark.
All them voters want,
they think they can chill and take pictures when Republicans want.
New York is like Shutter Island
for schizophrenic black guys.
He is unbelievably jacked.
He's like 3% body fat, shredded.
I'm sorry, I missed that.
New York is like Shutter Island
for schizophrenic black dudes.
Oh, for sure, yeah.
It's like they're all over the place.
It's like there's a mental institution that got like,
somebody bashed a window in and everyone escaped,
and you go, what has, what happened?
There's a guy from the Dominican Republic.
He's walking around.
And they're like, investigate it.
He's fully walking around, being like,
I'm trying to investigate who's punching these white wolves.
And they're like, Mr. Mayor, it was you the whole time. It was you, Mr.'re like Mr. Mayor, it was you the whole time.
It was you Mr. Mayor.
Mr. Mayor, it was you.
Sir Kingsley comes out at the end and he goes like,
this has been an experiment.
You were actually the president.
Big picture for Governor Skaboogie Mott,
man, eat my ass Mott.
Yo, this whole city is corrupted,
infested with systemic racism Mott's what's the ball thing?
He called boy. He called systemic racism stomach racism. Yeah
That guy's a girly guy more his wife is more manly than him
Whoo, no way you missed the best part. It's coming up in one second
That was him doing a carrot because you got that right you got it right
He's lifted a weight once in his entire life. He threw him pushups or something.
He came out with a six pack.
Joey, is armed neighbors from hell good
or should we watch pipe bomb blows up during routine tracks?
Pipe bomb's only cool for like five seconds.
I like how it says guy is facing a lot of charges
in the comments.
It says guy is facing lots of charges.
They're both very good. I don't know. Pipe bomb's cool for like 10 seconds. comments. It says guy is facing lots of charges.
They're both very good.
I don't know.
Pipe bomb's cool for like 10 seconds.
Why do you say that, John?
Because they're just searching some crackhead's car and the guy has like, like...
Joey, give me the drink up in the car.
They find a Ruger 22 in there and then a pipe bomb.
You saw that video already?
Yeah, yeah.
Have you seen Arm Neighbors now?
No, let's watch that.
Why, it's watch that
Why it's tough to do that. Yeah, sweet Joseph
When the wrong people get their hands on deadly weapons
No, what I said, what's wrong white do you mean Ron Perlman?lman no oh he kind of looks like Ron Perlman we're already cooking with diesel here come on guys
fucked up on tater salad separate incidents both in Wisconsin and we've
also got the surprising verdicts in these cases
and your wife's brain. And you're gonna have to pull the seat in the tunnel.
It's funny to make such a crazy claim while you're tied up.
And your wife's brain.
Ah!
And then he screams for his own life.
Ah!
This is like all taken place at a Margaritaville.
Man, I'm so happy we don't deal with snow out here, dude.
Oh, it's so hot.
Snow's cool for like a week.
Living in shithole New York with the snow. I mean, it's not
Ass you happen to be back yet. Yeah, I've been happy to be back. I've been happy. I'm being happy
I've been attractive. Come on. Come on
Sure, you're totally like you do. You don't miss New York at all. Oh, I miss New York all the time. Don't say that
the bagels
Where else can you get a soda?
The green where else can you get groceries?
Yeah, by the way, like where did you get groceries. Yeah. By the way, like where did you get groceries? Cause every time I'm there, I'm like, I don't trust any of the produce.
Uh, there was just a regular grocery store down the street from my place.
It was like that, that healthy hipster place. No, it was a key food,
which is like one of the normal, there's like C town key food,
few other spots.
How come all the grocery stores in New York have like tinted windows?
You know why.
Why you asking stupid questions?
Why?
I don't understand.
Are black people gonna like steal like apples or something?
I don't get it.
I was just making a joke.
I don't know.
Yeah, there's no reason why.
There's no reason.
They also don't, I don't know what you're talking about.
You can't see.
I have no clue.
Every time I've been in New York
and I see a grocery store, I look through the windows
and it just says the name of the place and and it's like it's like, you know glossy and you can't see in I have no clue what you're saying
I every girl sure to look like a normal grocery store. Just really small smaller. Yeah, I don't know
I remember Bodega, bro
Who's that who's that kid that moved to New York and he like couldn't believe that there was no place to get like oh
Yeah, he was in an actual food desert which is a thing in
New York there's like certain neighbors that there's not like a walking distance
grocery store and these people just eat like ramen and like bodega sandwiches
and chicken on rice and all that stuff but like for the most part I mean I
live in a place where there was grocery stores everywhere I just walked to the
grocery store got normal groceries no, milk, whatever you need.
They're easy.
Eggs and milk, pretty basic, but I'm talking about like,
did you guys get any, you know, you have radishes?
Yeah, there's full produce.
I don't know, yeah, it was a normal ass grocery store.
Fennel.
Fennel.
Sure, yeah.
You know, sprouts.
Sage.
Yeah, all of it.
All the things
Anyway, so hey, yeah, let's go like the video. Let's start from the beginning. Who is he number one?
I've only owned this property since the 28th of December. Okay, I know he's wack because the neighbors over there told me he's a little
Sorry, I'm a little peel sure now. Sure, understandable. So basically, earlier today at 11.15, I had a gal that was scared the **** of him because
she came to pick up an aquarium that we sold in the marketplace.
He comes down the end and he starts babbling and swearing and everything else about shoveling
the sidewalk.
He babbled on to me, you don't need to be in that **** house and this and this.
I said, buddy owner, get the hell out of here.
I was like, why not? That was it.
The gal, I have the witness, the gal from our place
will tell you, I think she was scared the fuck out of us.
So she leaves.
I'm in the house because I'm leaving at three.
I decided to come over this way
and I see this Dodge Dakota, I got a picture of it.
Dodge Dakota come up here
and I snapped the picture through the window
so he couldn't see me.
I saw him reaching in his truck for something
and I came out because I didn't want him in the house.
He was standing right here, I was standing right there.
The gun pulls up, it's a tan...
When they get that buzz, what does that mean?
That dun-da, that happens in every one of these videos we watch.
I don't know either, but let me speculate, like always.
Is that like they have sidekicks and Is somebody going like, where you at?
I literally think it's like, yeah.
It's a boost mobile.
We're at the AMC, like where you at?
It's gotta be some kind of notification.
I think it's just their phone.
I think it's just their phone,
and they have touch-up microphones.
This happens every cop video.
They all have the same buzzer, da-da.
It might be like a-
It's gotta be a cop thing, like there's another call
that they're like, they're dealing with something right now.
Or it's probably a radio sound.
Like the radio makes that sound radio sounds
interesting
Hey
Radio sounds I'm radio sound it's a tan gun. He has a tan gun. Okay, I'm fully loaded with like a handgun
Okay loaded
Okay, and then he's talking about across the street and society his name
Walbers talking about the the G's across the street G O O K S
yeah you could say gooks on patreon
I thought I was gonna inherit a bullet here and here.
I talked him to gun down three times.
Finally said, at least unload the gun.
I had a lie to him, I was in Iraq.
And I seen enough dead people amongst other things.
I finally got him to put his gun down and I shook his hand.
As soon as that was done, I walked back in.
I made sure he was getting back out.
I walked back in, hollered at her, called 911.
No, my niece inside there and that's where we're at right now. Did your niece see any of this? I walked back in I made sure he was getting back out about that can holiday or call 9-1-1 now
He's inside there and that's where we're at right now. Did you need to know because she's inside the house without a basement?
Okay, I got a picture of the vehicle for you. Well, I think we saw the vehicle. Yeah, did you show it to me?
Yeah, yeah
Probably skip ahead to the man. We've heard worse. So there's one funny part of that.
There's no bumps in this.
OK, wait, wait.
So skip slightly ahead where that guy's still talking
to the end of when he's talking.
And he asks, the cop goes like, so what do you want us to do?
And he goes like, I'm going to spoil it.
You don't have to skip it.
I'll say it.
He goes like, well, could you kill him?
Please kill him.
And then he goes like, OK, please, sorry.
I don't repeat that okay
I'm sorry, but I'm just PO'd right now. You know I'm just sorry. He's been real
Yeah, so he's like this guy's terrorizing his neighbors is the point so skip to the main
I'm gonna get her out of here keep going that way
Right there perfect right there
Hey, I was just wondering if you guys happen to see any of some incident that might have happened over there between some gentleman and another gentleman.
So I'm gonna skip to the house. So you'll see like a thumbnail of inside of it. Oh there he is.
Okay, so the guy in the high vis. So this is the crazy neighbor? Yeah.
Gotcha.
Yeah.
Do you have any of those weapons on you right now?
No, you know I don't. You wanna come look through my window? I got a discharge and everything.
He's like super reasonable.
Thank you.
What's that?
I completely disarmed it when I was talking to that guy that I thought was a drip.
Now that you're here, there's uh hedgehogs.
I told my neighbor that they were finally listed.
Because now that you're here, have you guys ever read Catcher in the Rye?
I still haven't.
I finally got some food.
You can hold on to this.
These are yours. I want you to look. No, I was hangry when I pointed that gun at my neighbor's head. I still haven't I finally got some food
No, I was hangry when I pointed that gun at my neighbor's head I was just angry to Snickers
Yeah, I looked at him hey, no you didn't go through them. Hey Brian Do you mind if I just pat you down make sure you don't have a weapon on?
Oh, yeah fucking free massage, eh?
Haven't had a warm pair of hands on me
in quite some time.
No one touches me.
Sure, you don't have to get your fucking shirt off.
These guys literally like, they cause problems
and have the police come out so they can get grogged.
These guys buy tickets, they go through TSA
so they get touched.
Because oh, don't check my ass,
there might be something up there. He goes, oh yeah, you found it.
You found the weapon.
Oh, that's cool.
He goes, you're close.
Keep going.
He goes, my Chinese neighbor released a hedgehog in my ass.
You want to check for that.
Next time I get groped by the TSA, I'm going to go like, oh, oh.
He's just game.
Now, you see like the Dennis Reynolds coming
where it's like you're holding your breath
and your eyes are bulging out of your skull.
You're making no noise though.
They're patting you down, they're like,
okay, you're gonna go sir, and you're like.
Ah!
Thank you.
Ha ha ha ha ha.
Look at that gut.
That's what I hope to achieve someday.
Yeah.
Beautiful.
The big bulging belly button.
I really, yeah, I just, that's not how I would look
if I got fat.
I'm jealous of those guys.
How would you look?
Well, I would, you know.
Big sloppy tits.
Yeah, big sloppy, I'd be sloppier.
You know, these guys.
Your body image is so bad.
No, I just, I'm saying I don't,
genetically my family doesn't have this tight body.
You have like great genetics.
It's actually insane. That's a beer gut
That's sick. Yeah, I know but Connor the rest of his body's thin. He's got a huge guy. That's fucking awesome
I don't it looks pretty good for a 31 year old
Pretty excited because our team has partnered with that's an ad That's guy who edits these No, no, I'm not, I'm not, I'm not, I'm not, I'm not, I'm not, I'm not, I'm not, I'm not, I'm not, I'm not, I'm not, I'm not, I'm not, I'm not, I'm not, I'm not, I'm not, I'm not, I'm not, I'm not, I'm not, I'm not, I'm not, I'm not, I'm not, I'm not, I'm not, I'm not, I'm not, I'm not, I'm not, I'm not, I'm not, I'm not, I'm not, I'm not, I'm not, I'm not, I'm not, I'm not, I'm not, I'm not, I'm not, I'm not, I'm not, I'm not, I'm not, I'm not, I'm not, I'm not, I'm not, I'm not, I'm not, I'm not, I'm not, I'm not, I'm not, I'm not, I'm not, I'm not, I'm not, I'm not, I'm not, I'm not, I'm not, I'm not, I'm not, I'm not, I'm not, I'm not, I'm not, I'm not, I'm not, I'm not, I'm not, I'm not, I'm not, I'm not, I'm not, I'm not, I'm not, I'm not, I'm not, I'm not, I'm not, I'm not, I'm not, I'm not, I'm not, I'm not, I'm not, I'm not, I'm not, I'm not, I'm not, I'm not, I'm not, I'm not, I'm not, I'm not, I'm not, I'm not, I'm not, I'm not, I'm not, I'm not, I'm not, in my fireplace. I'm trying to make it system. I can't climb on the roof anymore.
Can you spread it?
Can you spread it?
You need to look at the picture because there's a thousand words in a picture.
Hey Brian, can you spread it?
He's drunk.
He goes, we all know we burn toys.
He goes, I needed some air because I burned a toy.
I was bringing a toy.
You're burning toys?
What don't you guys get about this?
He's like, I've been burning toys.
He's like, let's cut this shit.
I'm the Grinch and I'm burning the evidence.
This is the same clothes I was wearing when you guys skipped.
Were you the first time?
No, this is the first time I met you, Brian.
OK, I was brought in once.
OK, yeah, a couple days ago, right?
I have no food in my house.
It's all rotten from 2018.
What?
My feet hurt.
OK.
Let's go look.
I'll show you the weapon right now.
You can see it through the window.
It's completely disassembled.
You look at it.
Because I got a gatling gun sticking out
of my living room window.
You can go see it.
It's from 2018, all with my rotted food.
I haven't used anything.
Come right inside please,
I'll show you all my weapons.
It's okay.
You know the giant mechanical spider from La La West
I got that in my living room. Come look to my window
Promise I won't unleash it on you. He's just fine
Yeah, you got those not unless you looked at him
No, this is my life why don't we finish talking out here Brian we don't need to see that
We don't want to see that.
We don't want to go near that gun until we have this conversation.
I got the silver cross and was awarded it.
That's my neighbor I want to save.
I'm going to buy that house so they can live there until a male and then he can go make
his own family.
Women need help.
They're unmarried.
I live here.
Are you coming to arrest me or take care of this area?
Because there's hedgehogs living underneath that Chinese.
I don't know what the fuck is going on. I see all your security dots.
I don't have any of that technology.
I only noticed things that changed since 26 years ago.
So what happened at the other houses down the road earlier today?
John, what?
John is just making no sense.
That's so fucking funny.
We're 10 minutes into this video. John's like, I'm getting a feeling. That's so fucking funny. Yeah John! We're ten minutes into this video John's like,
I'm getting a feeling this guy's not all there.
This guy's got a screw loose or something. I don't know about this guy.
The guy goes, I live in a fucking office space, right?
I fucking...
He goes, I just bought a motorcycle.
I have fleas.
I have fleas. I hate my own cum.
I hate my own cum.
God damn you guys.
It's hard to keep the cum liquefied in this cold weather, man.
I mean in cum Sundays.
It's frozen solid, man.
Cum days.
Cum days.
He's a vagrant.
I need that china.
I'm not a squealer.
I want to talk to him like a man.
You want me to call you?
I just want to talk to him, and I defend him myself.
The guy's from Iraq. He got Shaky.
What he's saying is he went to his neighbors house, pointed a gun at him, and he goes,
Oh, the guy got Shaky because he was in Iraq. He's got PTSD.
He has PTSD from guns being pointed at him.
The guy kind of hit a little gun pointing at him.
He goes, I go to my neighbors house, I set up a bunch of fireworks fireworks in his living room. He freaks out at very little
What's crazy is guys from that we're in Iraq are this old now?
He said he was an Iraq and I kind of
Neighbor was there the true push was 2004. No, that's what that was 20 years ago
The first guy interview was saying he was in Iraq. Oh shit.
Yeah.
Oh, that's confirmed.
He was not in Iraq.
He said that.
Oh, are you serious?
No, the guy in the first guy was like, I was in Iraq.
Oh, that's right, I wasn't in Iraq.
This guy's saying he was in Iraq too.
He's got PTSD.
No, no.
No, he's saying his neighbor he pointed a gun at
has PTSD.
Yeah, he's calling him a pussy.
No, this guy's saying he has PTSD.
No!
He has in the video.
He's saying, I have PTSD PTSD don't handcuff me not yeah
Yeah, oh god your brain is going so fast. This guy has PTSD from being handcuffed a lot
Just I'll talk to you right here. I would like to know what happened over there. He got the silver star
Loopy John he. He's talking nonsense.
I think this guy was in Paloesia.
He said he has a Chinese neighbor releasing hedgehogs
into the neighborhood.
This is probably because of...
That is, I could see that.
John, John just, John.
I could see Chinese guys releasing hedgehogs.
Yeah, they do weird ass shit.
Somebody get rid of all these hedgehogs first-rate.
John just sees himself in this, man.
He's just justifying his ex.
Stolen baller.
You guys here to arrest me?
You're here to arrest all the hedgehogs
because all the bunch of hedgehogs
are running around the neighborhood
from the Chinese house down the street.
We got Sonic over here, Knuckles, Tails,
and it's a fucking, it's crazy over here.
Same thing, we had conversation.
Okay.
I thought he was a vagrant.
I know all the owners of that house.
I know all the owners of all these houses before anybody lived here.
I'm the mayor actually. He's not it.
And he's not maintaining it. It looks like shit on the outside.
But I see plaster. There's vagrants coming off the railroad track.
And there's hedgehogs coming out of that Chinese house.
I don't like people herding animals in my neighborhood.
Because those are going to come over to my wood pile.
I burn wood. And then you're going to blame me and make me move my wood again they keep making
a movie's wood let's go over by the Chinese and just what you see from they
got a hole in their front porch you go look on your own one of you I'm not
gonna fight I haven't slept for 11 days I needed go see the head for yourself
hasn't slept for 11 days that's crazy the guy goes you haven't slept for 11 days. He needs a nap. The guy goes, you haven't slept for 11 days?
No, I've been up since I saw you guys.
When's the last time you ate?
Today.
My mother is like, just throw the fucker in my yard.
I was doing my own ceremony that I learned in Oneida.
Did I love confidence schizophrenics?
That's crazy.
I love when they correct you.
They go, no, that's not what's in my head.
He goes, are you listening to my thoughts or what?
You're fucking crazy, man.
You're not my internal monologue.
You have no clue what's going on in my fucking head.
You're not even up to date
with my fucking schizophrenic little man in my brain.
I'm a registered patient for anything I do.
He's whoopies. I'm a registered sex offender.
I have an alternative that I like that wasn't pain reliever.
My dad went to Korea. He looked like he was, why does he have paper all over the walls if he's doing a job?
What happened with the firearm at that house? Your firearm?
I was protecting myself.
The guy's one construction in his
house and so he's going like well his house looks like shit well he's a
fucking bad neighbor call uh call the HOA on him he's got a terrible house
he's like blue blue tape on the trim of the house it seems like a crime scene
actually that is what he's saying
yeah what was he doing?
Nothing.
And I put it away.
Okay.
What was the need for it in the first place?
I wasn't...
He's not the owner as far as I know.
I know who the owner was.
And there's paper all over the windows.
Just like that Chinese place.
Who's the owner of that?
That's always been the same.
One of the women.
So here, I'll tell you something.
I've been up here 11 days just watching where you guys are surveilling me.
Like everywhere. Good. No, I don't want to do any of that. So here I'll tell you something. I've been up there 11 days and watching where you guys are surveilling me like everywhere good
Nonsense in description, but what he's saying is completely clear. It's almost as if they're saying he's just crazy
Well the guy is not they it's the some this that retard yeah
What is crazy? What are you talking about? Yeah? He is no it is funny that he's saying something is completely clear No, what he's saying is they're putting nonsense on the bottom because it's it's funny to
Discern that like this is nonsense and everything else hasn't been not yeah like they're writing like the subtitles are accurate
Subtitles are what the guy that made this video is right nobody thought what he's saying match the sub
I know but when it says nonsense on the subtitles usually if that's
He sang match the sub. I know but when it says nonsense on the subtitles usually if
Like made a sense
Was a flagman 101 just move your shades. I don't have any phones. I need food I needed oxygen because I burned a toy
That was hot. I love this burning the toy narrative. Aren't you listening? By the way this guy's going like guys
It's November. We all burn toys
Never burn a toy guys. It also keeps bringing up
And also he keeps bringing up. Never burned a toy.
What the fuck is he talking about?
What is he doing in his house?
He keeps bringing it up like it's bait too.
Like it's driving him nuts
that they haven't like asked about the toy.
Yeah, he keeps bringing it up like,
yeah, exactly, like come on.
I killed Chucky the dog.
I finally burned his body.
Once again, I burned a toy.
Does nobody care about the toy.
He goes, okay, nothing? All right, I guess I burned a toy does nobody care about toy he goes okay nothing all right
I want to ask if somebody said that to me, but okay, I'm gonna skip ahead
Oh, he's getting arrested oh yeah, by the way Devon so half this video the second half this video is a complete
It's two in one so only the first half this video. It's not as long as it looks is my point I
Want to show you something
evidence
i want to possess it just like i do this
okay i'm very sure to come back on our
can you just say that reminds me of uh... my mom's blood
uh...
this is my dad my mother and i AA. Now I've got 20 years.
I read all the...
I'm sober now.
Can I have you face the fence for me please and place your hands behind your back?
Can you place your hands behind your back?
He goes, oh you guys want to see it?
I was like, I gotta piss.
He goes, okay, I get it.
You guys want to see the toy.
I do have to put handcuffs on you, okay?
Let's go back to my place.
I'll show you the toy.
Yep, we'll leave him as loose as we can, all right?
We're not trying to make it uncomfortable for you,
but we just wanna make sure everything's safe here, okay?
You know what?
He goes, it's just like the toy that I burned.
It's like, there's a, he goes, there's a snake in my boot.
He's like, I'm starting to think
that you guys are arresting me.
He goes, what are you you guys like fucking Lego cops?
It's just Toy Story 7
There's a little astronaut that's friends with a cowboy and I had to burn
You can call me Matt if you're looking for a name. I don't know if that's what you're looking for right now
He's like, okay Woody. Thank you so much
Hopefully said doesn't show up
This is in 50 years
Yeah, well about this Brian can we take have you take a seat in the car?
And then we'll kind of go from there when we're not saying
You purge your body he's a troublemaker
You know what's amazing about people like this is like you always wonder like when you see a video like this you're like
How does this guy like hey like how does he like remember like a guy is this crazy?
But he's still like paying like the DWP
Pay like his bills
He's a functioning psychopath he lives with his mom right he said that earlier mm-hmm. Oh did he yeah?
I I don't he made he but
But also a guy like that could have inherited a house and then he's got like a daughter that goes like okay
I'm gonna take care of your bills dad like stay out of trouble and he's just like he's like just throwing Buzz Aldrin into the fire
He's like a voodoo guy is like a buzzaltron doll he goes he's a fucking liar he's like we never went
to the fucking movie the secrets of the moon man I know you saw some shit up
there man holding him above a fire feeling hot buzz he's throwing like a
scooby-doo doll into a fire pit he He's like have a good day at school, honey
He comes over for Christmas and just leave for this like pants stuff with all the kids toys. Okay, I gotta get going
He goes these kids don't understand. I gotta burn their toys
And I have to point a gun point blank at my neighbor
You have toys in your pants is that did you take more toys?
He goes my neighbor freaked out but it
was clearly a nerf gun come on in I swear I got it's not an automatic weapon
it's a reboot cuz I'm retired okay well let's do let's start walking towards the
car here I'm gonna walk towards my car over here okay Ryan
Brian does anyone live in the house with you at all?
No, that's why I'm concerned.
Any animals or anything though?
He goes, no that's why I'm concerned.
He goes, no nobody lives in the house but these fucking toys they come to life at night.
You want it to be taken over by us as toys?
Would you like living in a home full of a full of full of human toys?
This is a horror version of Toy Story and every night he wakes up and they don't go back to sleep
And he's losing his fucking mind. It's a damn museum in there. You want to take me to jail
Go wake up and I get tricked down the stairs
He goes last last night Teddy Roosevelt held a bayonet to my fucking neck
You tried living in that place as hell
Amelia Earhart tried to fuck me last night man
I'm losing my fucking mind in this place
Add that on to all the hedgehogs
It's a fucking... I hate this neighborhood
The hedgehog exhibit is really fucking with me
The toys are enough hedgehogs now Jesus dude something arrest the hedgehog exhibit is really fucking with me.
The toys are enough hedgehogs now.
Jesus dude, arrest the hedgehogs.
Fucking slinky dog, I hate it.
Just arrest these damn hedgehogs.
The Chinese guy is releasing hedgehogs into the night.
It's like pets I mean.
Like a dog, cat, bird.
Hedgehog. It's like pets, I mean. Like a pet or? Like a dog, cat, bird.
Pet dog.
We can keep going to the car, that's fine.
We'll talk to him, take a seat, I'll turn the heat on so you can warm up the seat.
This is kind of the end of it.
You know what we should do is uh...
Is that it?
Yeah, well he sits in the car and it's like there's no...
The video goes on forever, they interview him and shit.
It doesn't get that much better.
Well what was the thing in the beginning though where he's screaming in the trunk?
The trunk? Oh, in the back seat? Yeah, and he's like, AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJ But I want people to have a chance. I didn't know what was going on. I want to defend my neighborhood because you're not.
You got other s*** to do.
Legally. I don't know what the rules are.
Well, pointing a firearm at somebody isn't exactly the way to go about it, okay?
How much? Because if you...
He goes, how much is the fine?
So pointing a gun at a guy's head.
He goes, name your price.
He goes, you guys are crazy. You know these head jugs, these hedgehogs, these Chinese hedgehogs.
Name your price and they're like, well, bail's 10,000.
And he goes, how about seven Funko pops?
I'll give you one of my toys.
How about that?
How about I give you a beanie, baby,
and you let this all go?
You can burn one of my toys.
How about that?
10,000 dollars?
I'll let you take a blowtorch to miss a potato head, how about that?
We call it even?
He goes, you guys with your rules, alright, here.
Here's a fucking toy.
Put him in the damn fire pit, I don't care.
You can throw my toys in the fire pit as much as I hate that.
Alright, alright, you can have my bop it.
I don't...
If you let me go, you can have the...
You can have the bop it.
Everyone back up.
You go, hey, you wanna barter toy?
Okay.
I see what's going on here.
You guys wanna barter toy?
He goes, oh, I get it.
You guys came out here because you have a little like toy lust
You're itching to burn I see what you guys are doing you guys have been itching to burn a toy, too
Well I got a fireplace bigger than
Ever fucking seen take the cuffs off. Let's all go burn
Guys guys, let's all come down. We let a rock and shock them robots up in the flames. I'll go to bed. I
Got a stretch. I'm strong
strong! No, no, no fellas! We take it up a notch! We take some bay blades! We let them on fire! Let them rip! It's dueling flames! Ticket! You decide how much I owe
you to learn this lesson! I want to make a donation! There's no ticket associated with this okay? I'm gonna
turn the heat on for you! Wow!
associated with this okay I'm gonna turn the heat on for you.
Skip a little bit. We can't loosen any further it sounds like they're already pretty... Okay Brian. After looking through the windows of Brian's home for
items in plain view an exception to the Fourth Amendment... Plain view doctrine, never heard of that.
That, well, Amaganta talks about that all the time.
Look through windows and see stuff and that's legal.
And that's why he says, like, I'm allowed to film things
from outside if I could see it.
Plain view doctrine.
Yeah, if I can see it, you can't trespass.
He says that while he's like macing a lady
at the post office.
Here's I can see your eyes.
It's fair game.
Plain view. Plain view doctrine.
Plain view doctrine. Plain view doctrine.
He paces a sleeping lady through a window.
I think.
Plain view doctrine.
It's like a cat burger.
He goes, Plain view doctrine.
It's an old woman sleeping.
He goes, read the constitution, bitch.
It's like a cat burger in the 20s.
He carved this perfect circle in the glass. And he's just standing there and goes, blame you, Dutron.
She needed to taste the sauce.
Time to spice up your life, mate.
Oh, fuck.
Officers return to talk to Brian and confront him with what they've discovered.
Alright, Brian.
Can you take my hat off?
Sure, you can.
It's too cold.
Yeah.
Alright, I'll take your hat off.
Holy shit.
He goes, it's too cold.
Take my beanie off.
Yeah, that's weird.
He's literally...
He's all backwards.
He's completely out of his mind.
He's all backwards.
He's totally right.
I'm going to look inside your house, Brian, and then he cuts it. He's like... He's like... He's all backwards So your house bride and he cuts it he's like he's like he's like Heisenberg in the back
This is JP Ryder Morgan in 20 years. Except they're collecting hate watch clips from his computer.
He's like, they come from hell and when you go into warp speed it actually transports you to hell.
By the way, if you like toys, check out toys check out JP Warhammer. He collects all kinds of
toys. What's his Instagram? JP collects toys. Just look on our Instagrams. WaterforgeJP. He photographs
toys and collects toys. Check him out. It is lovely. Continue water hydration is huge. Water. We can get you some water. We can get you some water. It's in my house. My water. Guys come on unlock me and I can huge water. We can get you some water like this. We can get you some water. Okay, it's in my house
My water guys. Come on unlock me and I can drink water
He goes, you know like a lot of these toys are Chia pets they need water
I have some concerns about some that guy escalated down there
He didn't introduce himself and he's possessing that house. And I pointed a gun at his head.
He didn't introduce himself so I pointed a gun right at his skull.
He goes, I didn't want to sound crazy but that guy is a toy.
And I'm doing my civic duty by trying to burn it.
I love schizophrenic people, dude.
I went and addressed it.
He escalated it with argument, and then I went back
And I talked he got twitchy in his hand and he's not
Reaching for it so he was like yeah, I bet the guy was like
And he's go hey, what the what are you doing bow because you and you you you China men your hedgehogs
He's fast on the iron this fucking guy. Okay, we met at high noon
And he's twitchy
This thing the first time this comes off that road that used to be sick
Could you talk with these loose at least in the front?
From from the South Pole
So what Devin so what happens is they take him to jail,
they interrogate him, and then they realize,
wait, we do need to go into his house to see his guns.
So skip ahead to that.
They come back with him, and they need him to be with them.
So he comes.
Oh shit, yeah.
Yeah.
He's like, officers, let's get to the Brackstacks.
Santa Claus is my arch nemesis.
What's going on? I don't know. It's like glitching.
Is she doing it? There we go. Devin, you got this.
Oh, maybe I say the one that's all him.
Brian, it's Officer Breagaman.
Can I come talk to you?
I'm going to jail.
Oh, shit.
That's the scariest thing.
Is this the crazy neighbor?
This is the next one.
No, no, this is the separate one.
No, I just want to make sure you're OK.
Are you sure?
You're on the phone with my partner.
Pause for a sec.
So this is a separate thing.
It's an old, like, demanded guy that it's not.
This is a different video?
It's a different guy.
They say Brian. No. Wasn't that it's not. This is a different video? They said Brian.
No, what?
Wasn't that guy's name Brian?
If yes, then it's like, uh.
Wait, this isn't it?
It's the same video.
It's the same, so maybe it's the same guy,
but this is a different incident.
I think it's the same guy, bro.
Why would they put it in the,
would this be in the video?
Why would this be in the video?
A lot of guys do videos where it's like,
here's the top two craziest neighbors.
Put that down.
Never was it. This is the guy that he pointed a gun at. No, I don't think it's him. No the top two craziest neighbors. Put that down. Have a look at him.
This is the guy that he pointed a gun at.
No, I don't think it's him.
No, I don't think so.
Skip ahead and you'll see his face and I think you'll agree that it's not him.
I got a feeling it is.
Is it in this chair, Brian?
It's definitely him.
No.
Wait, look at him.
Why don't we get you stood up here, we'll get you over in the chair, okay?
That's not him.
One step at a time here.
Different guy.
Remember me, Brian, now?
Thank you.
I don't want to remember nobody.
Oh, baloney. Let's get you turned around. I just want to get some help, man. That's not a different
Neighbor from hell. Okay. Well, should we watch this one? No, I was saying go back to the end of the first guy's video
Yeah, and so so when they take him back to get his guns. What's this all about? Sorry, it's alright, sir.
I need water, that's all I need right now.
Okay, we're gonna hop back in that same squad car that we came in on.
I almost got killed, I was just trying to stay alive and practice my own beliefs, okay?
Alright.
Let's go hard again.
Practice his own beliefs.
I can bring my own personal...
Wants to burn some toys.
...system back to where I got it.
Absolutely can.
Can I?
Yeah.
Because I was practicing my own won't, can I do that?
And what I'm doing here?
You know, like cleaning my...
I don't want to lose my...
He's like, you guys have made a huge mistake.
The toys have only gotten stronger since I've been locked up. Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha Except they're not so little. And that's your fault. No, I don't want you to lose your toes either.
I stopped watching here, Devon.
So maybe the footage stops before they go in.
Yeah, I don't.
I feel like it's amazing.
No, it's not.
That guy was nothing else.
I know.
Go to the next.
Go to the Boston amazing video that I say.
I bomb.
No, no, no.
Boston from the notes. Go to the next, go to the Boston Mazing video that I say. High Bomb? No, no, no.
Boston, uh, from the notes.
Go to the notes.
It's like, uh, uh.
Military Fatigue, it's Maze by Boston Bros.
That's it, yes.
This is my favorite video.
Don't come at me, bro.
Get away from me now.
You're a pussy.
Get away from me now.
You fuck, I'm gonna fuck you.
Skip the highlight, there's a spoiler.
Fuck you.
Go back.
Don't come at me bro get
away from me now you're gonna threaten me now huh
Devin go back to like when the when the conflict starts
you're on it go to the fucking far you psycho told me to go to the ball play the video from the beginning
What's up something I don't take orders from
Yeah, yeah, I'm supposed to take orders from you and answer your stupid fucking questions
Yeah, but they so am so this lady shows up again. No, okay, so this is a
No this so this video is a top three masings of all time
Three masings of all time and so that little first clip was a highlight of all the top three basings
Remember we watched this
We watched that one but you see the Boston guy that we have a new one. Oh this is a compilation. Yes. He just said top three, amazing. God damn Devin, you
order man. You told me literally to skip ahead. Not to. You go to a bump and I went.
By the highlights. Pass the highlights. Okay now play it you fucking is the highlight
He went down those stairs gay
My ass
Cheeks, huh?
Now what are you gonna do away from me now?
It's lieutenant Dan Dan noodle
Dude look at his gut literally looks like a big ass. It's divided. It's got like a sexy ass
Hell yeah, Joe you did a fucking Steve Austin over here what happened happened? It got like shaken up I think from when it fell. Yeah
I'm now so okay buddy. It's wild stuff smell like pineapple
That's actually better than how I smelled before. Yeah faces all wet now
Your microphones all slobbered on sexiest. You look like you fought through like a alcoholic war
God that was crazy
I like this. It's like a top gun get away from me now
Does he spray him?
Yeah, he just got sprayed right there I think.
It didn't look like that.
Oh yeah, I got him in the back of the head.
Don't come at me bro.
Are you serious?
Let's go.
Dude, you come at me again.
You spray me again.
Oh man, it looks like he's wearing a white t-shirt.
I'm going that way.
You better go that way.
He goes, I'm going right.
Go that way now.
What are you going to do?
Get away from me now.
What are you going to do?
He just sprayed you and you left.
I warned you.
He's going to go that way. I warned you.'m going right. Go that way now. Get away from me now.
What are you gonna do?
He just sprayed you and you left.
I warned you.
He's like, I'm going home, that hurt.
I love masings.
Yeah, it's really good.
Joey and I talk to each other all week
and Joey and I, it's most of the conversation
is about being maced.
He's.
We should set a Patreon goal where if it's like we get to
10,000, we all mace each other.
No, not like the sheriff's department or whatever.
When they do that mace test.
I'm down.
Being maced.
I'm sure sucks.
It can blind you.
Also being maced.
If you're a pussy.
There's some cases of people being maced
and they go.
You're being ridiculous. What are you talking about? Just maced. There's cases of people being maced and they go
See what are you talking about?
Cases of people being maced and they go permanently if we get to what are we at now?
Seventh hour we're not doing this
Mace me and Connor will be in Connor will I'll happily let you go blind Both you guys Why do you want to be funny after nobody wants to see us get mates?
No, I'm gonna get hillbilly it makes or an old lady at me after 10,000
You know me and John do we can do the episodes looking like the three blind mice
So this is probably good cuz like we need to let the public know to join the page
I thought you guys like the whole time we amazed. Yeah
Stay subscribed if your patreon you are if you're listening
Well, then they don't have any incentive to keep
Is the public that's what I'm saying? No, I thought I was so I thought it was better
No, we'll have more tears. You're kidding. This is a better episode for no way. No, it's been way haven't said such hateful bad stuff
John what did he say? Bad stuff
Something that was like oh, yeah, okay, this is public you said that it was very bad
I'm talking about why guy needs to kill himself who I
Forget oh popular guy
It was way worse than that, but it was something that would get you cancelled basically and so this has to be patreon
All right fine. It's patreon. I want to
Back when you listen back you always go okay shit. Joey was right. Mm-hmm. Okay. Let's see what happens
Hey, guess what you're listening on patreon right now cuz I was fucking right
Go ahead if this if you guys are really making this deal It's patreon. What's the deal public? Yeah?
We encounter get mace if we reach 10,000. That's not worth changing it. Nobody cares about that till I'll make these guys for free tonight
For ya he just yelled for ya
I'm not following you, I never even approached you.
I told you, don't follow me.
I told you, don't come at me like that
in a threatening manner.
I love how this guy's still being tough.
He's like, you're a fuckin',
he goes, you and I, if we come close to each other,
I'll fuckin' knock your head off, buddy.
He's like literally running away.
And now you got sauce buddy
you guys they all go with the sauce
oh yeah okay I love that he's like he's saying he's going to drive over him with his car. Yeah, it's like his move I'm not following you
Yeah, come at me like this guy was insane You made my eyes all fucking Mexican! I'm all spicy!
He's like, Montelliente, motherfuckers!
God damn it!
You put a jalapeno in my fucking eyeball!
God damn it!
This guy's...
He's like literally running away, but he's like still acting like he's the upper hand here.
He charges back again.
Oh, hell yeah.
Oh, fuck yeah, dude.
You all come and threaten the camera guy.
You'll come in threading a camera guy
And he gets in a pot that sucks
By the way if a guy like this says he's gonna fucking kill you wouldn't you be believe it wouldn't you be I'm certain I would yeah, he's in the 90. I don't care much mace. I have you're wearing full cam
I would like that yeah, and you're like you'd look like you fought in a war these guys live for this shit
Yeah, you need to go the VA. They're waiting to shoot some I mean these these
Auditors and the maze guys are like willfully ignorant. Yeah
Laws on my side, but it's like well killing someone
I'm not gonna do shit anymore. You see that video of the
I'm not gonna do shit anymore. You see that video of the
Two hispanic couples arguing next to the truck and that guy cocks his gun and then like
Punches him once and the guy just unloads an entire clip into him like blank. Have you not seen this video blank?
He sent in the group chat, yeah, yeah terrific I don't know if I watch it's a man and a woman and they're arguing with another man and a woman and the guy is
Behind a truck and he like cocks his gun and puts it in his holster in his like waistband
And then they get and then they keep provoking the other couple and then the guy comes up and like punches throws
I throws like the worst punch
a weak punch doesn't get hit and the guy immediately pulls the gun out and then the guys are whole shit and he turns
Around the guy just unloads the entire Hell's the husband and the wife no no I'm screaming the wife is screaming running away
That's I mean I want I guess we can watch it because it's no
It's also not funny at all I'm not trying to laugh at it. I'm just like you just
You know that keep watching this. Next time.
I wasn't even filming. I wasn't even recording him.
Man.
How'd that feel, buddy?
He goes, stop the fucking scion!
Oh no. Here we go his shirts off
In a kia soul get away from me, bud
600 units responding to 100 mineral street. I'm now gonna
Human terrible I was thinking an indecent exposure now
He's threatening the poor cockat.
Oh, that's you, buddy.
You can't even fight without using purpose!
He's killing you right now.
Hi, Brian Walbritt.
Is that a modified engine, John?
No. Did that guy think him spinning would do something? It nails him in the face. I love people getting mazed. So funny. Shamed. Cause like you know what a lot of people out here like they don't they don't have
a lot of people out here that are like,
they don't have a lot of people that are like,
they don't have a lot of people that are like,
they don't have a lot of people that are like,
they don't have a lot of people that are like,
they don't have a lot of people that are like,
they don't have a lot of people that are like,
they don't have a lot of people that are like,
they don't have a lot of people that are like,
they don't have a lot of people that are like, they don't have a lot of people that are like, they don't have a lot of people that are like, There's another mason. Yeah. He'll get over it. I love people getting maced.
It's so funny.
Because like, you know what?
A lot of people out here, like they don't, they don't have enough spice.
They haven't been maced enough.
They haven't been seasoned.
A little tapatilla.
Bunch of, bunch of white ass motherfuckers.
You need to get fucking maced.
Boiled chicken ass.
Boy ass.
Fucking unseasoned ass.
Boy ass.
How about we make your make your ass crack pepper?
Paprika motherfucker.
Mmm hmm.
Caliente.
No, he ain't.
Here we go.
I love these weird little music companies.
This guy's about to get maced really hard.
I haven't seen this.
This is good. Hey get your hands off dude.
What's wrong with you? What are you doing putting your hands on people? He goes that's against the
rules of retardation. You violated the rules of being a retard.
He goes, if I'm retarded, you be retarded back to me.
You have a legal agreement to be retarded with me.
You can't pull out this fucking salsa.
You can't spray my face with salsa.
He's like, fail, you use your possible thumbs.
The funny thing about these auditors that always,
it's like they act like they're defending
some massive first amendment.
Yeah, this guy's defending a business he doesn't work for.
What is the actual legal thing they're defending?
The first amendment.
Yeah, first amendment, but taking photos
in semi-public or public spaces,
that's just so like if you wanted to take some B-roll
for a movie or you're taking a family photo,
some fucking asshole can't sue you in the background or some shit
No one's ever complaining about these guys. Yeah, they're exploiting the first
These people are bad people no, yes
We know
It's blowing my mind
This your first audit we're talking about these people for months.
I'm starting to think Amigans, it's like not a great person.
I'm recording you.
Smile for the camera.
Wow, dude got handsy, man.
This guy barely got hit with pepper spray.
He barely got hit, but he's still fucking ran away.
Don't go into Dale's hair care and get your hair done, guys.
They like to come out and assault people.
Wow.
Dale's hair care.
That's Dale.
That's Dale's hair care.
He cuts your hair.
Oh, Riverside County.
Do you want to know why you're filming over here?
I can't disclose any information right now, man.
For sure. If anything, I just wanted to give you a heads up. They're gonna come over here? I can't disclose any information right now, man. For sure. I'm working
I just wanted to give you a heads up. They're gonna come over here and talk to you
Yes one know what the curiosity because I mean I'm not gonna answer their questions because you could you just called me a smartass man
Well, you gave me a smartass answer. So you asked me if I needed help and I said I don't need help
Yeah, how's that smart is Riverside County accountability the same as I think so. Oh a blur is it slow he sounds like it the same voice
Yeah, you see get back to work man
Go back sit down sit down on your little little chair in the inside
Go sit down on your little chairman. He's like I can sit down wherever bro, but we'd be right here
He goes we could do this all day, homie
Man, you were covering your face homie. No, You see that my fucking pants are tucked into my fucking boots homie?
He goes I pretend to be a fucking GI Joe all day homie.
In a little fucking shack.
I take fucking parking tickets homie.
He's like, listen homie, you see the beer guy, you see the mail pattern bonus, I'm insecure as shit homie.
You don't think I'm fucking insecure homie?
You call my chair little homie I'll fucking kill you homie
All my friends have new Hondas
I have an old Honda I'll fucking kill you
I'm fucking pissed off
I'm fucking pissed off fool
Cause I hate my fucking
I hate my job the chair is normal size though fool
Don't fucking say that shit bro
You gonna take me to a fucking broken chair homie I hate my job the chairs normal size though food don't fucking say that shit, bro
Shitty weird mohawk. Oh, I went to Floyd's barbershop these white bitches like fucking cut'll fucking, I'll stand here with my arms crossed, you better pepper spray me homie!
He's like, I've been pissing in a fucking water bottle, fool, you don't give me fucking
time off, dude, like, don't fuck with me like this man!
He knows weird references, he's like, I'm pissing in water bottles like Howard Hughes homie!
He goes, they call me the fucking aviator of parking lots and shit homie! He's like I'm fucking pissing in water bottles like Howard Hughes
He's like look at this mason jar full of my fucking toenails you'll think I'm fucking crazy
1920 I don't fucking think! He's really into the 1920s He's an arsehole from the 1920s He only knows the references from the 20s
He only knows the references from the 20s
He's like Foo there's like a wizard behind a curtain here Foo
He's like controlling me
He's like oh you think you're funny Omi?
You think you're like Lucille Ballet shit Omi?
He goes I fuck you like Jane Mansfield Omi?
Sorry for the funny, it's like, whatever.
They're old bitches, whatever.
He goes, you see me when my fucking arms cross, Omi?
He goes, you see this like, you see this fucking white stick?
That means you can't come through! Like this you see this fucking with this white stick
Is he white nice nice
I turn my back to you now light Universal Yeah, yeah, they're clowns man. I hope he's white. That's a white guy.
Why are they like clowns?
What happened here where they like calmed him down
and now they're both looking at the same thing?
This guy's just thinking about his job.
Yeah, he's like, should I do it or should I not?
He's like, alright, streets came out to me for a second
but like fucking calm down fool.
He goes, sometimes the streets come out, homie.
He's like, fool, you can't lose your fucking cool here man
cause you start here and one day you'll own this fucking company
He goes, he goes, he goes, I'll fuck you harder than Ida Lupino homie
This boots gonna be all yours one day bo
He goes, he goes, one day homie I'm gonna own this fucking fleet of fucking box trucks homie
He goes, he goes, he goes, he goes, he's like fucking Casablanca homie
You think you're like the red baron and shit He goes, he goes, I'm fucking Gary Grant homie! You think you're like the Red Baron and shit?
I'm fucking Gary Grant homie!
He's like call me Ralph Hitchcock cause shit might get spooky up here homie!
He's a touch of evil, arson wells homie!
He just starts listing up whole shit.
I'm spooky like Vincent Price dude! I'mogie like Vincent Price They got everybody Oh
You just got sprayed
What did he do to fake you fake punch you pump faked him
Damn it wasn't really on video you gonna smack me homie?
you wanna smack me like James Cagney in one of his
damnzles in distress homie? I'm not paying you. I'm not paying you. What the fuck do you want?
I'm not paying you.
Get a little dog back.
What the fuck do you want?
What the fuck do you want?
I love how he does the music.
What the fuck do you want?
His face is...
Wait, is Pepper spray sometimes like colored?
It's like blue.
He's got blue paint all over his face like colored like it's like that's like blue. You got blue paint color
It's called it often and again
Marking your territory
Man he starts playing PVC pipe like the blue man
He was gonna fuck with me damn. That was quick. That was a quick fire. Wait is this a brand new mace?
Yeah it's a new mace. Jesus look at this guy. This guy looks like a like a meatball in El Bondi guys.
Looks like a fetus patch.
El Bondi.
I love this cut right here.
Damn that was quick. Yes I think this is Manchester. Maybe you should start fucking sucking cock
Get mace ten times as much as you
Probably uses our sucking cock
He's like now you know, John goes on from spawn
I'm like, Jaws and Gozama from Spawn, homie! Hahaha!
I love how the fuck do you feel about that!
I love these guys posturing
but still mentioning like they're like super
specific movie references
from the old days. With that,
go back to that, that is the best reference
I've ever heard.
It does look just like him.
With the paint on his face,
holy shit. They'll cut to him
cause that screenshot can't come somewhere. Okay him because that screenshot okay just keep playing it
car and jesus christ i think this is manchester
yeah this guy is actually um assaulting us
do you have a dog did they film me a movie here
spawn too we need uh police runaway because this guy's out of control
Don't approach me again
Have a dog fuck you fuck your pussy
Yes, yes, he assault him
Yes, yes, he assaulted
This looks Hispanic with LA hot he's wearing a green
It's probably faster if you just turned on spawn
It matches your fucking shirt, that's marine green
The otter is now becoming a cholo
Good character. I think they're both true. Isn't that bizarre that he also sprayed him with the same color as his shirt like literally the exact same color Lucky we got lucky they give us exact same color. It's a lucky little thing for us.
It's a lucky, we got lucky here.
They gave us a little treat.
That's a little treat, bro.
Call it coordinated mason.
That's amazing, dude.
Dude, I'm not kidding.
The mace color is the exact same as this guy's shirt.
He, this guy's wearing a Marine green shirt.
The mace is the exact same color as the guy's shirt.
It's like this guy that maces people,
like has like a color for every shirt he mazes.
Yeah, he's got this big Crayola box.
Yeah, he's got it.
That's crazy. Isn't that crazy?
Yeah.
This is sponsored by the Seattle Mariners.
Yeah.
Oh, looks like the security guard knows him.
It looks like the security guard knows this guy right here.
Yes. Yes.
You're one of my friends.
Yeah, it looks like this is the man
with the security guard right here.
I love how tough he's showing up here too.
Look at this. Look at this, guys. The security guard-
He's like, give me some chains. That just makes me feel better about myself.
He's like, just hand me some fucking chains.
This black dude's like folding an American flag for him right now.
Yeah. Yeah.
Call this guy over here.
Nobody knows why. That's me. Yeah, yeah. Call this guy over here. Nobody knows why.
Yeah.
And there's like a Doberman, like just some guy holding a
Doberman.
I'd be more scared of his fucking
chest. No, no, man.
Okay. What is your name?
Oh, I'm not gonna tell you I'm a good citizen.
Shut up though Shut up
Who looks stupid now fucking idiot
Yes, yes the big things right here, man. I love when people are so retarded they get like insults wrong
He can't even say idiot. He can't even say idiot right? He's like fucking ed ed dot
ed re ed re
ed re op ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed ed Ed, Ed, Ed, Ed, Ed, Ed, Ed, Ed, Ed, Ed, Ed, Ed, Ed, Ed, Ed, Ed, Ed, Ed, Ed, Ed, Ed, Ed, Ed, Ed, Ed, Ed, Ed, Ed, Ed, Ed, Ed, Ed, Ed, Ed, Ed, Ed, Ed, Ed, Ed, Ed, Ed, Ed, Ed, Ed, Ed, Ed, Ed, Ed, Ed, Ed, Ed, Ed, Ed, Ed, Ed, Ed, Ed, Ed, Ed, Ed, Ed, Ed, Ed, Ed, Ed, Ed, Ed, Ed, Ed, Ed, Ed, Ed, Ed, Ed, Ed, Ed, Ed, Ed, Ed, Ed, Ed, Ed, Ed, Ed, Ed, Ed, Ed, Ed, Ed, Ed, Ed, Ed, Ed, Ed, Ed, Ed, Ed, Ed, Ed, Ed, Ed, Ed, Ed, Ed, Ed, Ed, Ed, Ed, Ed, Ed, Ed, Ed, Ed, Ed, Ed, Ed, Ed, Ed, Ed, Ed, Ed, Ed, Ed, Ed, Ed, Ed, Ed, Ed, Ed, Ed, Ed, Ed, Ed, Ed, Ed, Ed, Ed, Ed, Ed, Ed, Ed, Ed, Ed, Ed, Ed, Ed, Ed, Ed, Ed, Ed, Ed, Ed, Ed, Ed, Ed, Ed, Ed, Ed, Ed, Ed, Ed, Ed, Ed, Ed, Ed, Ed, Ed, Ed, Ed, Ed, Ed, Ed, Ed, Ed, Ed, Ed, Ed, Ed, Ed, Ed, Ed, Ed, Ed, Ed, Ed, Ed, Ed, Ed, Ed, Ed, Ed, Ed, Ed, Ed, Ed, Ed, Ed, Ed, Ed, Ed, Ed, Ed, Ed, Ed, Ed, Ed, Ed, Ed, Ed, Ed, Ed, Ed, Ed, Ed, Ed, Ed, Ed, Ed, Ed, Ed, Ed, Ed, You're glad Gary Glen Ross looking motherfucker. He's like a fool. I bet you got like vertical right now
Copies for closers fool
And you're like blinding share now, you don't know where to go like north by northwest
You have no clue where to run huh? Is it the cornfield to the left the cornfield to the right?
They're gonna end up on top of Mount Rushmore for like finding
Nick cage again, bro
Yeah, and that's that and there was nothing to be done and I think that's a perfect button and I think I think we did
Some good work here. I want to keep going we can we can keep going
I like can we keep go well Connor has to do that fucking birthday
But I we've done like an hour and a half, yeah, I'd rather keep going is that okay or no we have to go
No, we can know actually fuck. Yeah, fuck everyone. I know and people I love but yeah, let's keep going
Well, wait no
He says he wants to end.
He's trying to get you to take the pressure off.
No, I don't wanna end.
It sounds like Joey wants to end.
I wanna end.
Well, no, Valor, cause I talked to Valor.
I'm tired of my back hurts.
You wanna end.
I wanna end.
I'm tired of my back hurts.
Okay, your back hurts.
I'm sorry, man.
You okay?
No, probably.
That feels good though.
All right.
God bless everyone out there.
Thank you so much.
Come to the show.
If you came to my show, thank you so much, I love you.
Yeah, if you come, if you came to the show, we love you.
And I'll keep you updated on a July show.
And come to London.
It was in the comments of the last episode.
Yeah, unless you're that weirdo.
Come to see a movie, unless you're that freak.
Also, this may not pan out,
but we've promised everybody free wings and nachos
for the show that will be tomorrow. That's a lie
You'll you'll see this on Monday and you go yeah that made sense cuz there was nothing well
No, I'm saying no I'm saying that maybe this will be a funny thing
When there's no nachos, I'm just saying Joey's gonna get drunk enough that he will order wings and nachos
I probably will eventually just get like guilt-tripped. Yeah, so you're welcome. You're he will order wings and nachos for everyone. Joey will eventually just get like guilt-tripped by all the food and nachos.
Yeah, so you're welcome. You're welcome for the wings and nachos.
You're welcome for the great show.
And yeah, I love you guys.
God bless you all.
Wish you could keep going. Love you guys.