Heavyweight - Heavyweight Check In 8
Episode Date: June 18, 2020As we turn our attention back to producing classic Heavyweight episodes, we leave you with one last check in. SPOILER ALERT: This check in contains a special treat. Special thanks to Matthew Boll and ...Doug Barron. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices
Transcript
Discussion (0)
Hello?
Kalila?
Hey.
Let me get Stevie on the phone.
Hello?
Stevie.
Hey.
Hi.
So this is going to be the last of our check-ins.
Yeah, we're going to turn to working on a few more classic- type heavyweight episodes to release later this fall.
So last check-in. And it's an abbreviated one, right? Right. It's kind of like the last day
of class before the teacher allows everyone out of the classroom, just wishing them a good summer.
Yeah. And you all watch the like one VHS tape of Princess Bride that the school owns.
Actually, we do sort of have like, I don't know, a movie.
A television program.
TV for your ears.
Stevie and I approached our engineer and composer Bobby Lord.
Ah, I know that name well from having mindlessly said it
during the credits.
So, yeah, so Bobby in the past
has made us these remixes
taking lines of audio
from Heavyweight and making them fun
and danceable.
And we thought, maybe he can do something like
that with the check-ins.
And very quickly
it got out of hand
so bobby did not make a song instead he took uh things that we've said in these heavyweight
check-ins we've been doing and he sort of stitched them together out of context to create this whole new fictional storyline.
So what we have for you is an episode of, I guess, like heavyweight, the sitcom.
Well, that sounds really nice.
You know, it's silly and it's kind of ridiculous, but... Just be honest, Stevie.
It's a deranged piece of audio.
It is absolutely nuts.
But we find it very entertaining,
and hopefully other people will too.
Yeah, let's sit back and open up our ears
to quote the great showbiz talent Kurt Cobain,
with the lights out, it's less dangerous.
Here we are now.
Let us entertain you.
Hags, have a great summer.
Gimlet Media
presents Johnny and the Gang.
Starring Jonathan Goldstein.
Kalila Holt Stevie Lane
And introducing Bobby Lohr
Created without the knowledge or approval of Jonathan Goldstein.
Kalila?
What?
This weekend, my in-laws,
they came by.
Okay.
Living the dream. Hello? Stevie. This the dream.
Hello?
Stevie.
This is she.
So, I had a blind date tonight.
So, how did it go?
Have you guys seen Panic Room?
Hello?
Hello, Jonathan.
Bobby Lord.
I trust you remember my friend Joey?
The one and only?
How could I forget?
I just wanted to drop by to see if y'all had heard about the rumor.
What?
Oh, the rumor that Spotify was going to cancel heavyweight unless you can somehow come up with $500.
Wait, wait. No need to respond.
Well, I guess I'd better get going.
Oh, actually, one more thing.
I'm sure you all have also heard about the big Spotify talent show four days from now.
I think the grand prize is $500.
Well, anyway, Joey.
Yeah?
I think we'd better get going.
I think you're right.
I hate those guys. This episode is brought to you by Pet Rocks, Mood Rings, and Cool Open Collar Dads. I don't know what I'm going to do.
This is like a bad dream.
Sorry, you guys.
I don't know why I'm getting so emotional.
It's okay.
So what do you want to do?
What?
Four days from now, we're going to sing.
In the show?
Yeah.
Spotify talent show.
The grand prize is $500.
We can do this.
I am just shameless.
I'll do anything.
Let me try, Stevie.
Start spreading the news.
Wow.
Is that good?
It was so beautiful.
Kalila?
Do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do.
That was excellent.
Stevie?
The waiting is the hardest part.
Wow.
You know, what was really great about it was your sense of timing.
Yeah, exactly.
Four days later.
Four days later.
Hello, everyone, and welcome to the big Spotify talent show.
As you all know, tonight's winners take home the grand prize of $500.
Get your showbiz voice on, Kalila.
I'm going to just go get a bunch of liquor.
Hello, Jonathan.
Bobby Lord.
Stevie.
Hey.
Joey.
Is this your knife?
Jesus, Joey, no, put the knife away.
We're not doing that.
I'm surprised you had the guts to show up.
We got important work to do.
Oh, look, hors d'oeuvres.
What is this, sir?
Broccoli and cauliflower. Ah, look, hors d'oeuvres. What is this, sir? Broccoli and
cauliflower.
Mmm, thanks.
Presenting our first performer tonight,
Bobby Lord.
Well, looks like it's my time to shine.
Oh, by the way, I'll be using the
prize money to fund my new podcast,
Hefty Burden with Bobby Lord.
Ciao.
I hate those guys.
Hi, everyone. I'm Bobby.
None of you probably recognizes my face or my voice
or even know that I exist
because I'm usually shut away in a dark mixing room
doing all the work no one ever thinks about. Fixing your popping P's and leveling DB's. But I do exist. This is my chance
to shine. Come on, Bobby. To salute in Deus altore meus.
Yes!
Beat that!
And now, our second and final performers for the night,
Jonathan Goldstein, Kalila Halt, and Stevie Lane of Heavyweight.
Start spreading the news.
The waiting is the hardest part. Do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do.
Do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do.
And wow, clearly the winner is Heavyweight.
Well, congrats, Heavyweight.
You were the better performers.
Yeah. Oh, yeah.
Oh, yeah.
Well, I wanted to ask Bobby, will you join us?
Really?
Okay.
Oh, also, a man just came by and said heavyweight's not canceled anymore.
That man turned out to be Daniel Eck.
So we can use that $500 for whatever we want.
I'm Randy for toilet paper.
Toilet paper it is then. Next time on Johnny and the Gang.
Robo-papa, if he doesn't get his fuel, he gets brain damage.
Thank you.