Hello From The Magic Tavern - 12 - Krom the Barbarian

Episode Date: May 23, 2015

Krom the Barbarian is going to be my guest this week. He is... a big guy.CreditsArnie: Arnie NiekampChunt: Adal RifaiUsidore: Matt YoungKrom the Barbarian: Mark LogsdonOtok Barleyfoot: Nick BaerMysterious Man: Tim SniffenProducers: Arnie Niekamp, Evan Jacover, Ryan DiGiorgiEditor: Ryan DiGiorgiMusic: Andy PolandMagic Tavern Logo: Allard LabanYou can support the show directly and receive bonus episodes and rewards by joining our Patreon at https://www.patreon.com/magictavern for only $5 per month. Follow us on Twitter and Instagram, and now Patreon!See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

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100 PLUS Spaces available in Chicago by the day or month. That's DeskimeApp.com. Hello from the Magic Tavern! A weekly podcast from the magical land of Foon. Hi, I'm your host Arnie Neekamp. In case you have never listened to the podcast before, I'm from Chicago. Several months ago, I fell through a dimensional rift behind a burger king into the magical land of Foon. Luckily, I still have my podcasting equipment, and I'm getting, somehow I'm getting a little

bit of a Wi-Fi signal from the burger King, there's some firewall issues, but it's enough for me to do a weekly podcast in the familiar minotaur the tavern in the town of Hogs face in the land of Foon, and I'm sharing all the weird adventurers and characters and monsters that I encounter here, and as always I am very pleased to be joined by my two cohosts. Hello, Chunt here. Chunt, the talking badger slash. Well, I'm not necessarily talking badger right now. I'm a talking badger right now.

I am a shape shifter. I prefer to be called John the shape shifter for future reform. Okay, I'm sorry. I'm just trying to paint a visual picture for our listeners. Oh, please do. You're sort of this adorable furry badger guy. And that's all I've ever known you as. And as I said before, I will be very sad

when you finally change into another animal. What? It feels as if it's very satisfactory. So don't take that away from me. Okay, fair enough, fair enough. And I'm sure our other co-hosts is just waiting to introduce themselves. Yes, I am.

I have used it all. Wizard of the 12th realm of Ephesians, Master of Light and Shadow, Miniculator of Machel's Light, Stavaur of Chaos, Champion of the Great Halls of Tarakas, the O's Nomius Fien-Yelok, the Dwarf's Nomius Zoninog Stainzies, and I'm not a North East-us-guess-manus-may star. And there may be other secret games you do not know yet! Hello? Hello! Who's our guest today? Oh, you know what? We are very lucky to be joined by Crom the Barbarian.

Hello. Hello, Crom! I'm Crom. You are a big, powerful man. Yes. All Fingarians are as large as I. Ah, that was going to be my question. What tribe were you from? You're a big, powerful man. Yes. All Fingarians are as large as I. That was going to be my question. What tribe were you from?

You're a Fingarian. Mm-hmm. I see. From the northern tundra of Fingaria. Wow. I guess I haven't heard much about Fingaria yet. Right, it's the very, very distant north. Yes. We're off the grid.

The grid. Yes, the grid of food. It's a simple grid if you if you look at the wanderer's way It's the main line of the grid and then all other roads tend to go off of it in a public-niculous fashion. Oh wow I guess I didn't know that can ask you a huge fever and just Don't take this wrong way. Would you mind not holding your club high above your head like you're about to smash it down? It is a little intimidating am I am I holding it up? Oh, I the way you're holding it looks like at any time you're just gonna Smash us. Yeah, I do know that it but your face is slack So I don't know what's coming. Yeah, you do know that chant is a shapeshifter, right?

To not an actual badger for you to do that hour. I understand yes, I It's just habit. My normal resting position is club over my head. Why, do you sleep with your club over your head? I sleep standing with the club in a batter's position. So I'm standing holding two hands as if I'm ready to hit a stone that was thrown towards me. Oh, wow, that must, is it hard to get a good night's rest?

Doing that? Hmm. How often are stones thrown at you? More frequently than you would imagine. I have a bit of a temper. Oh, oh. Crumb. What kind of set you off?

Being embarrassed. Oh, crumb. I hope of set you off? Being embarrassed. Oh, crumb. I hope this question doesn't embarrass you, but why do you so easily get embarrassed? Although I am big compared to you. Yeah, I am one of the smallest fingerians. Oh, I will find you very interesting. You're huge.

Although I will say, you're pretty close to our any size. Come on. Chent. So you're the- you're the kind of rent of the litter? Yes, I left Fingaria because I felt inadequate. Ah. And in these other lands, I am so much bigger. It makes me feel better about myself.

Grub. This is the classic hero's journey. Oh no. You have left your land to make a name for yourself. You've decided that you shall become a great man, despite the adversarial nature of your very birth by your the smallest, but yet you shall be the greatest. And all you have to do is find a party Come with me to defeat the dark lord and we shall sing praises to each other drink me together assuming we both survive

I don't know. I don't even really know you guys Well, okay, I just see I'm throwing it out there. If you change your mind. Yeah, I'll be right here I look you look at me You see a large big bag of muscles. Yeah, that you want to hire to join your party Do you even know who I am? What do I like to do now to be fair? What do I like to eat? Crom has an interviewer. I really would really like to get to know you well I'm exploring my options at the moment.

I, the only things I know that I do well are fight, kill, and try to sleep with women. Oh. And fight and kill are kind of tied together. I mean, so that's like two. Well, one is fight not to kill. Oh, okay. Fight to, then you're right. Then I'm wrong here.

And one is to kill to be dead. Sometimes I air fight. Air fight? If I get a few cups of meat in me at a tavern, I'll go in the corner and air fight a bit. Like just swing at the air? Ah, an exposition of your great prowess. Yes, exactly.

Which I have to say so far has a 0% success rate. Because it just looks, does it just look a little weird? Yes. You should come back on Chunch Night. Oh yeah, Tuesday, Wednesday and Thursday. It's a Chunch Night. It's been extended. Yeah, Chunch Night is on so many nights.

I've learned since moving into the Vermilion Minotaur. This fall, we're having a blood drive. People do name blood, I call it the Chun for Red October, so if you are free, maybe donate some blood. Chun, I have a much for you. What does that name mean? Well, it's a blood drive in the fall. This is gonna take place around October.

Oh, red October. And red is for the blood you give. So blood, yes. You know, when you give blood, it's called a red October. And I'm hosting it, so it's the chunk for red October. Okay, that's a chance. Yeah, I'd know I like it. You're promoting that well in advance of October.

Well, we brought up Chancenay and I just wanna get the word out there. I mean, there's a lot of people in food who need blood, either vampires or, you know, blind goblins or you know, there's just a lot of people who... Wait, this is a blood drive for free trails. I need a free trail to eat blood. Yeah, what else do you have? Why else would you have a blood drive?

It's for people who like to drink blood. If you are losing blood on some sort of... If you're losing blood, you're dying. If you're losing blood, you're weak and you should be killed. Yes. Right? Yes, exactly. Prom, help me out here. Unless the blood is bad and you just need to get the bad blood out.

Yeah, then you get some reaches. And sometimes that will make you stronger to get out the bad blood. The bad... problem, maybe. Prom, you're a big barbarian. Have you had adventures? That's a horrible... Yes, he has. have you had adventures? That's a horrible. Yes, he has. Have I had adventures?

Sure, you know, you can also ask Arnold if he's ever hosted a podcast before. Have you? Yes, every week. I'm just not getting any better at it. I see, Alex. Yes, I've had many adventures. I've plundered many temples.

Some forgotten, some still current temples. Oh, wow. It's probably easier with a forgotten temple. A forgotten temple is tense. You'd think it would be easier, but there's usually a pack of skeletons or a giant slug guarding treasure. And Kram has to deal with that.

Kram, what is your technique for taking down a skeleton? Well, typically when... Can you air show us how you would find a skeleton? I can show you how I start, but I get into a rage and I truly don't know what happens next. I snap into a rage and everything goes bright red and then when I come to everything around me is destroyed or killed. Okay, what's your relationship like with your parents?

Yeah. Well, my father was a barbarian. Mm-hmm, that's hard. And to be honest, I don't know if I would have chosen the life of a barbarian but my dad was so here I am right following in male pops footstep what would you what else would you want to do my tribe is you spirit animals bears I don't know if you know finger but we're into bears really into bears we're into the power of a bear and what they represent in terms of strength and Sige of your people exactly

But I always thought bears were just interesting as Just from an observational how they live how they hunt for food. I used to be a bear you were a bear Yeah for about, for about nine months, how's the bear? Wow. How do you become the bear? I can turn into whatever creature I sleep with. You sleep with a bear? Yes. Crumb almost every night has a dream of sleeping with a bear. Oh wow. I see you're of sleeping with a bear. Oh, wow. I see you're... Are you taking out a piece of paper? Is that a poem?

This is a dream journal. Oh. Crane, what would you mind? We just asked this. This is asking a lot. Would you mind sharing us some things from your dream journal? Sure, he would be honored. I'm out in the forest...

tracking of deer. When I notice out of the corner of my eye a cave. Hmm, I never noticed that cave before. I move towards the cave when I hear a low growl. This movement under my loincloth. I approach the cave's mouth. I feel a hot breath on my chest. It's probably a bear. The bear puts his claws around my back

and gives me a big bear hug. Male or female, I think, does not matter. male or female I think does not matter for in this moment cram is bear and bear is cram then I finger the bear that's beautiful so is a female you can finger a male bear I guess. Thank you for sharing that. Yeah, thank you, Crom.

I guess it was not what I was expecting, but... I wasn't expecting to read it aloud from my dream journal, but... That was so beautiful. I hope that you understand that this is a safe space. I hope you feel good about sharing that and not weird. You shared too much and then... No. Okay, that's good I think that your dream may have an interpretation that is magical

I think you may be a Speaker of animals I Believe you may have the gift to control animals with your very mind Try and control me. Okay Sit keep keep sitting there. Wow, it's working so far. Good work. You know what, let's get some more mead.

Let's take a quick break. Let's refresh our mead and we have a spot. I don't know, I'm assuming, hopefully, we have sponsors on the Earth side of this podcast, but here in Foon, even after that fingering the bear. Well, for now, we'll see. But here in Foon, we have,

we are sponsored by Otock Barleyfoot, the owner of the Vermilion Minotaur. Let's get some drinks and we'll hear from Otock. Come to the Vermilion Minotaur. We have Wizards and Halfworks and Dark Elves and lots of fun for the whole family. Oh, hey, and Otaq, don't forget to do the promo code. Oh, the promo code is just something.

Right, podcasts like to do. Yeah, when you get to the door, just whisper chant stock to the bouncer. I did not. promo code, chant, you bet. Okay, so if you, yeah, that's just the way that a chant. You've hit me. Okay. So, if you, yeah, that's just the way that you'll know that these promotions are working. Right. If anyone from my world comes in.

Okay. So they have to be in your world. Yeah, I don't really know that anyone in this world has any concept of this podcast yet. But, but hey, as soon as people, other people figure out how to get here, they're going to be flooding in and the first place they're going to come is for a moment. Okay. Alright. Alright. Alright and we're back. Thank you so much Otock and please come to the

for a million-minute tour if you ever do find yourself in Hogsface or in Foon. So crumb. I found it. I found it. I found it. What? I found it. Here. Crab. I wanted to give this to you. So I ran upstairs and I found this this stone take this stone Keep it keep it near you What no no nothing take this stone will help you focus your energy so that you can speak to animals and hear their thoughts and here I have this feather and if you hold onto this feather you'll be able to fly using your ears That's incredible. Why are you not sure this? No, I'm sorry. I was joking. I was kind of making fun of your stone thing

I just gave him a magical stone I know I kind of don't buy it Sorry, and no, I'm sorry. Maybe'm misreading it. Maybe it's a lie. No, gosh. Oh, there goes the club, the club's back up. Oh, no, no, no, no, no, wait, can we try something real quick? We're going to say a word to you. And you just say the first word that pops into your head.

We'll just go around, we'll each say a word to you. And that will just allow you to express yourself and sort of simplify it. This is a pretty fun game. Oh, that hasn't started yet. This is a pretty fun game. Oh. That's an starting game. Yeah, we're even starting. OK, so I'll go first and then we'll go use the door and then Arnie.

Sure. Bear. Oh, that's OK. That was my turn. Exemplify. Throw. Oh, OK. Family.

Crush. Oh, no. okay. Uh, family. Crush. Oh, no. Adventure? Uh, small bear. Fingering. Dreams. Dad. Bear.

Blood. Mmm. Grud. Do you say grud? Grud. Oh, grud. Okay. Was that just because it rhymes?

Blood, crud. I think that's where it came from. Am I winning this game? You won, you won, you won rhymes? Blood, crud. I think that's where it came from. Am I winning this game? You won, you won. You won. Oh, right. You should put your, you should put your, uh, your pull down your, uh, uh, uh, I'll tell you guys, I really, I'm glad to be in some friendly company. I was, I burned some bridges in the last town.

I was literally burned some bridges. I, I'm my way out, I did literally burn bridges, but also just didn't make a great name for myself. I had a few, many cups of meat at the tavern and... You know, we've been really sort of feeding you meat. Maybe we should, should we maybe... That's a good point. I'm talking about me! Oh, yeah.

But so, I'm sorry. Garnie, I know one to stop. Keep keep going keep going. I'm sorry. Keep going. Thank you Garnie. I was air fighting in the corner and a few of the towns folks they threw a table at me and took my sandals and threw them on the roof of the tavern so I couldn't get them. That is terrible. And then everyone laughed because I looked foolish without my sandals and so I got angry and pushed a bunch of statues over. Yeah, you're heaping embarrassed, so that's... What town was that in?

Gratacks? Gratacks. The next timing, I mean gratax. You can be assured that you should or the blue shall defend your honor for you, Chrome, do not deserve to be treated since such a way. Is you should or the blue a new name? You should.

I have a blue wizard. I've always been a blue wizard. That's why I wear these blue robes. No, I just... That's how they know me, Gratax. You should or the blue. Oh, okay. That's why I wear these blue roads. No, I just... That's how they know me in grat-tax, used it all the blue. Oh, okay, that's fair. Crumb, would you...

I'm putting an open invite to come to chance-night. Anytime you want, maybe read some more of your dream journal and we'll set it to some music or something. I would love to... I'm a big crumb fan. You've been great. Yeah, I think you should get on stage and air-fight, also. I think people would love to watch that. You are someone. You are worth something.

Are you okay? I'm getting a little bit emotional to be honest a Did not expect To meet such wonderful people. Oh, you are more than just killing and fighting to not kill you know what to me You are not crom the barbarian You're just crom. And I'm still sitting, which means you can control animals. Wow. Wow.

This is... This is a big day for crom. Big day for crom! Crom. Crom. Crom. Crom. Crom.

Crom. Crom. We sent him to a right corner. Crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab Oh, crumb! What the heck? What's that queue up with? I felt like that was a very positive... Everything around me is broken. What the... Oh, no. Crumb did this, didn't he? Yeah. Crumb, you killed a lot of people in here.

You know what has to happen now? Give us your sandals. Oh. But I like these sandals. Give us your sandals. We're putting them on the roof. Welcromb, uh, thank you so much for joining us. I'm sorry that we're gonna have to throw your sandals on the roof and run you out of town.

But hang on to that rock. That's for you. I already broke the rock. Oh no, how do you even... It's like just powder in his hand. I don't know, it's a magical rock. You shouldn't be able to break it at all. Yeah, well, it's still work. If I mix it in my meat and drink it, let's say yes. Yeah, you know, as you leave Hogs face, what's in the future for you, Crom?

I'll be honest, I'm kind of interested in settling down. Mm-hmm. I'd like to find a wench and see if she will sleep with me and bear me a son. Oh, that's a great goal. Fatherhood is very exciting. I'm recently a father and it's really enriching. I think maybe you'll bring you some of the peace that you're looking for.

Do you think a human in the bear can make a child? It's worth a shot. I mean, right, I don't know how it works here in Foon, so I would say there's a thing you could be, but you probably wouldn't kill that as soon as possible. For fear that it will grow stronger than me. Let's see, yes. This is probably a good time to say that if you love discussions of killing your bear children, please give us a good review on iTunes. Now that's how more people on Earth

can find out about this podcast. Also, you know what, you can email us here at magictavernatpuppies.supplies. I've explained this time and time again. It is absolutely a real email address. It's all I could get. And so is chantatgmail.com. That's chant with six T's.

Yeah, somehow chant was able to get a real Gmail address. Why don't you Sarah if you're out there maybe send us any them. Yeah, you can also contact me by sending a piece of parchment attached to a raven. Oh, wow, that's great. I wonder if that would work trans-dimensionally. What's that? Never mind. Chant, do you want to read one of the military email here from Paul Nichols? Big chant fan. Chun, do you want to read one of the... Yeah, let's read an email here from Paul Nichols, big chump fan. He says, Chun, now that you no longer have a roommate, are you looking for a new one?

I promise to be more considerate than Arnie thinks Paul. I actually am looking for a new roommate. I will say... I hate to say this. I will say Arnie, if you ever want to move back in, I will have you back. But otherwise, my listing is on smegs list So go visit smeg in the forest. Yeah, it's there's a man named smeg in the forest has a list of everything that's going on So if you want to go visit him the forest you can get all the details

Is it always safe? Like if you go to smegs list and he says like hey, you can meet can meet this imp at this bridge. Like is it always safe? I think it's probably safe for you one out of a thousand times. Oh, yeah. So you got a pretty good shot. Yeah, I just be careful with some eggs list. It sounds like why don't I read an email.

This is a little bit of a long one that we got here. It's from Vaterralax, the consumer. It says, from the lava caves nestled in the cascade range of the Great Pacific Northwest, Earth, this is an email from Earth, home of Vaterilax, the consumer, Dragon Protector of the Emerald Forest, to Arnie, the traveler, podcast Raffoon, to chun the badger, sup chun, to Yusador, the wizard, to Yusador, the wizard of the twelfth realm of Ephesias, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, who bestank? To all of you.

What did it say in that part? It's just all of your name. We don't need to necessarily spend time on it. I can say it if you're confused. No, no, no, no, no, that's all right. I think people heard it at the beginning. To all of you, I bid you greetings. Please forgive my sending of this mis-sive by electronic mail and not by wax, sealed scroll

carried by an accredited herald of the guild. It is not that my manners are lacking, but rather I know not how to find the port of the fun for there too many burger kings in my thralls to search reasonably. By wave introduction, I am a funian expat living in the world of earth, so someone must have got from fun to earth. Like you Arnie, I then he should know the food and shame. Brevady is the soul of wit. Yeah, this guy has a lot of time on his. Yes, this is

really just table setting to the actual email. I'll try to get through it relatively quickly. Like you, Arnie, I traveled through realms through a magic portal. However, my passage was forced on me by a wizard during the great battle of Havers Dwell, many souls on all sides were lost that day, and they still sing songs of it. I'm told the stories are still stained. If it is not yet evident, I'm a dragon of the Titan blah blah blah, sorry, I don't mean to piss off a dragon.

I've been told that one of the worst things you can do is piss off a dragon, then a wizard or than a flower. And I'm writing this letter to comment on your distinct lack of dragons on this interview podcast show of yours. I've listened to your entire back catalog and not once have I ever heard a passing reference to my kind. Da-da-da-da-da-da. He lists several dragons, Castle Edina, Thurmius, the loveliest of all dragons,

Gregorff of the Dark Woods. Let's see, blah, blah, blah. I had sort of a joke about his serpent. Oh, let's hear that. Chumlos jokes. And I'm gonna skip to the end here. I have written too much and taken your time for that. I thank you.

Please consider my request to have a dragon on soon. Should you be unable to find a willing guest, perhaps I can have my Thrall Kevin rig up a headset and I can grant you a Skype interview myself. I can't really get Skype to work, so that's probably not gonna happen. But thank you, your listener,

Vatrella Lacks, the consumer dragon protector of the Emerald Forest, at Vatrella Lacks on Twitter. So that's pretty exciting. of the Emerald Forest at VertelLax on Twitter. So that's pretty exciting. I guess there's a dragon that has made his way to Earth and has set up a Twitter account. What's Twitter? Twitter, it's an email, it's a web thing in my world.

Oh, thanks for clearing that up. Now, what is this name again? It's a Vert-terrelax. He's a dragon that's been, I guess, gone for 250-something years. Yes, you've said that four or five times. The terrelax, what you don't understand is often on my travels, you know, I leave Hogs face for three or four days at a time, looking for adventures and great men and women

to take up the sword against the dark lord, and in those travels I also speak to people of Arnold's new podcasting endeavors here, and I have approached two dragons at this point, neither of which have decided to be upon the show yet. They both declined. And we are very upset by that. Of course we want to represent a dragon on the show. I'd love to have a dragon on the podcast. But they can be offensive. No offense to you, sir, but they can be a person.

Nickety lot. Yeah, flaky. Yeah. Well, thank you so much for the email, Vert out, TeraLax. Ooh, I, you know, I looked, I have, I was able to get on Twitter for a little bit. The Wi-Fi was working well on that. Yeah, too.

And it's- What would you talk to Sarah then? I, no, Sarah, I did, I should have, I should have tweeted it. Sarah, now that I think about it, that's what I don't want to be found. No, I do, I miss her, I really do. I, but- Is she on Twitter? She, look, that's my wife we're talking about.

What did I say? Uh, I did notice that a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a,ertealax has been on Twitter only a couple months, about the same time as a few episodes into our podcast. But I can only imagine he's really a dragon because if you're making a fake name for yourself, it would probably be something easier to ever find. Chrom have you ever fought a dragon and your ventures. I once tracked down a dragon, but it ended up being a very large lizard. Oh, that's disappointing. I still killed it. You didn't ask about that.

Did I kill the lizard? Yes. Hendley. Tell Vaterilax, I will take this list of dragon names and we'll, we'll attempt to find one of them on the show. And you know what Vaterilax, I noticed. Can you tell him that for me? Yes, I will take this list of dragon names and we'll we'll we'll attempt to find one and put them on the show and you know what for Terrelax I noticed can you tell him that for me? Yes, I will yes He has no followers and he is only following three accounts Modern Seinfeld and Nealist Arby's so

There throw a dragon a bone I guess and follow him at Terrelax v.e.r.t.e. Dragon of Bone, I guess, and follow him at Verta-Teralax, V-E-R-T-E-R-R-I-L-A-X. Really easy to remember. Did this guy pay you? What are you doing? I didn't push in the sky. Twitter count. I don't know why.

Did his impression piss me off? You are really pushing this guy's Twitter count. I don't know why. It's not. It's not me. I don't know who it is. It's some random dragon on Earth. And why do you say dragon like that me I don't know who it is it's some random dragon it on earth and why do you say dragon like that I don't I'm sure you read his Twitter account

five times when you could have at least said that serpent dick show he made that's what people really want to hear I suppose I think what's not really that kind of show all right thank you crumb thank you guys and we'll be back next week Sean can you show me how to post a missed connection on Smixlist? Will you let me not sit anymore? Absolutely. Raise your hand if you thought all of that really happened. If you raised your hand, I want you to break it off and set it on fire because all of that really happened. If you raised your hand, I want

you to break it off and set it on fire because all of that was fake. Chant the Badger is merely an avatar for human voice artist Adolf Reffy. Usador the Wizard was only a performance carefully stitched together by the eternally playful mind of Matt Young. Crum the Barbarian was played by special guest Mark Logston. You can see Mark perform in the fishbowl Thursday nights at Chicago's annoyance theatre. And Otock Barleyfoot was played with a rare vulnerability by Nick Baer. Hello from the Magic Tavern is produced by Arnie Neekampe, Evan Jacoba and Ryan DeGeorgie,

edited by Ryan DeGeorgie, edited by Ryan DeGeorgie. Music by Andy Poland. Hello from the Magic Tavern logo by Allard LeBan. Learn more about the show and how it's not real at hellofromthemagictavern.com or follow us on Twitter at Magic Tavern. You can find hello from the Magic Tavern on Facebook, but you can't find us in other dimensions because as I've told you, there aren't any.

All of this wonderful, wondrous wonder But you can't find us in other dimensions because as I told you there aren't any. All of this wonderful, wondrous wonder was sponsored by DeskTime. Learn more about DeskTime at DeskTimeApp.com and the Chicago Podcast Co-op at ChicagoPodcastCo-op.com. you