Hey Riddle Riddle - #219: Opposite Mouse
Episode Date: September 28, 2022In this episode we finally get to tour Hey Riddle Riddle University AND we crack into some sweet sweet listener submitted Riddles. We are also introduced to Donny and Donny’s Butthole repair becau...se we are getting worse at improv. Oh also! We actually have a friend we would love to set you up with so stick around! Starring: Adal Rifai John Patrick Coan Erin Keif Editing by: Casey Toney Theme by: Arne Parrott Logo by: Emily Kardamis & Emmaline Morris Want more? Get Weekly Bonus Eps on Patreon! Want merch? Visit our TeePublic Store! or pins, buttons & prints Want to mail us something? Hey Riddle Riddle 6351 W Montrose Ave #267 Chicago, IL, 60634 Want to leave us a voicemail? Call (805) RIDDLE-1 or (805-743-3531) Want to advertise on the show? Check out Hey Riddle Riddle via Gumball.fmSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
Transcript
Discussion (0)
This is a head gum podcast. Welcome to the great hey riddle riddle university.
If you walk with me this way, we'll get to see some of the campus's most beautiful spots.
To our right is the KC Tony School of Audio Engineering.
Wow.
Are any of you interested in studying that
when you get here to?
No, no, no.
Great.
Kind of want to be more like on mic town.
Yeah, on mic would be great.
Great, then you, young sir, might like JPC school of bullshit.
You sort of have to be a filled with nonsense.
Insane unhinged person in order to get into that school.
You have to feel a lot of tests to get in.
Love that for him, not necessarily something
that I'm interested in.
I'm interested.
Okay. I'm a motherfucker. Piss cousin. I'm more interested in something a little more
conventional. I don't know if this is something for me. You might like the crown jewel of our
campus. The Adolfi library of puns. It is gorgeous inside there. You have to say sorry three times to get in.
That's the secret password.
If you go to your right, we have a question.
I'm sorry.
No, we're in the library.
If puns do you mind if I grab a book off the shelf and just let's see.
Okay, great.
Grab this book off the shelf.
Oh, it's an audio book.
No, it's an audio book.
So there will be a brief audio message that will be played and this book is called it's it's it's a it's tea
I'm in the tea section and this is looks like it's tractors
So it's like tractors and the tea section and then it's just like and then I'll also it's a pun
So has to be cross reference. Are you sure you're not interested in the JP?
I'm not bullshit. I'm not I'm not interested in this necessarily in the pun school. I'm just trying to set up what because it
correct me from our other kid on the tour. Does this make sense that it would be
tractors and then there would be another pun to like cross-ferference. So does
that make sense? Hey man, why are you doing this?
Well, I would be no for going to school here. You're right. I'll put it back.
We'll never get to hear what the tractor pun may I know this is what the parents want to hear, but we think safety comes first here at Hayward
O'Rittle University. May I be honest? Uh-huh. I balked because I thought he was saying
he grabbed a book and it was a T book and a tractor book and I thought there was going
to be some sort of brood T and tractor pun cross hybrid and I was terrified
and I understand he meant the letter T section.
I said yeah, it was like the letter T. I picked up the book that said tractor.
Let's go back. Let's go back. Let's just open up this.
It's the same book. Sorry. Sorry. Hold on.
I'm sorry. This is a completely different section.
This is P and this is a book. This is pirate ship.
So I'll open this one up and
planks for nothing. Okay, so I don't want to go to this school of puns, but I get the appeal.
I thought planks for nothing was pretty good. I liked it, but again, I'm not a bugger. I'm working this tour for weeks. Can I?
Sorry, ma'am. Can we go back to the tractor book? I just feel like that would be.
That would really sell me. It's too late. Well, I didn't bring the book, so I do have it here.
Okay, go ahead.
I'll just crack it open, it's the tractor book,
and let's just crack it open now, and...
John, dear, time to get up.
Huh.
All that for that.
Great.
No, hold on, there's gotta be a better one.
Turn the pages, turn the pages.
Okay, you can go a couple of pages, shuffle the pages.
Here we go.
Oh, sweetie, I track tore my pants.
Can I just leave the book on the ground here,
or do I have to go left?
Yeah, you can just leave it right on the ground.
Wait, there's gotta be, shake it out, shake it out.
Let me shake the book out.
It's something's wrong.
And then one more in the tractor.
Why are you doing this to yourself?
Honey, it's cold outside.
It's time to put on my harvest.
Okay, I like that one. Will that make it better?
So as I was saying, safety always comes first here at Hayward-O-Rodler University,
which is why we have a place for what the students can go if they get hurt or sick.
The Aaron Lee office. Why did you look at me when you said safety first?
Because just because I have these Wolverine claws?
Yeah, I was just wondering if what you were
doing with those and if you think
you're gonna run and get impaled.
Is there anything else you'd like to see on the campus
or it doesn't seem like you either of you
are that interested in having?
What you said is that Aaron Keith Dentist Office
or something, what you said?
It's a nurse's office.
I wanna see that.
Oh yeah, do you mind if we take a quick peek inside?
Actually, it's a lot of people who have had very embarrassing injuries.
And I just don't want to really.
Oh, I we simply must feel like this is going to be a highlight.
Yeah, we can pick what we can pop in and then you can name what you see.
All right.
And just a quick peek in.
Go ahead.
OK.
Wow.
Oh, it's a treasure trove.
Look at all this.
Well, look at that.
It appears to be a woman who was cleaning a fish tank.
It got sucked inside.
Ha ha ha.
Oh, me.
I didn't say that.
That's a KC-274.
That timing was insane.
That building was beat away.
Oh, I think I see, is that a woman working in a,
I wanna say a Marshalls, and she,
something happened where her shirt came off
and a man commented on it.
A Marshalls.
Nordstrom, and it was a full shirt opened up
in one of her tits, Vella.
Hey, you, that's the best woman in my life.
Shut this crap, you know.
What else?
It doesn't matter.
Anywhere else on the campus that you'd like to see?
Hold on, I see some more stuff in this room.
Leave them alone.
Yeah, there's someone shitting their pants
in a New York hotel room.
That's not even an episode.
That's not even fair.
What?
Yeah, I mean, we can honestly,
we can really make a meal out of this room.
This one seems like it is,
oh, wow, this is wild. I never thought I'd see something like this in this room. This one seems like it is, oh wow, this is wild. I never thought I'd
see something like this in this room. This is another one of the pun books from the library.
This one is acid. It's for snakes, and I'll just go ahead and open up snakes. And it says,
poison, poison. This one says, can I ask you a question? I don't know why the voice,
what the audio voice wasn't working on that changed mid-pun. Yeah
So snake somebody just go to a different page on snakes. I'll open this one up
Red and yellow killer fellow red and black friend of Jack
Okay, so I maybe this book is for the difference between a corn snake and a coral snake
I maybe just book it for the difference between a corn snake and a corals thing.
Wait, honestly, it doesn't seem like you either of you are qualified to get in here. I don't think you probably have the test scores, but it's sweet of you to
for coming out today.
So thank you.
No, and I am just for clarification.
I'm a 33 year old man.
So I probably should not be going to hell out of here.
Yeah.
Okay.
Okay.
Uh, and I am a 33 year old man.
And I am JPC.
I'm Adolfo.
And I'm Erin Keith.
And welcome.
Well, this is a podcast.
Hey, everyone.
Throw your caps in the air
cause you just graduated from
Hey, Riddle College.
Mm, whee.
Not an accredited university.
JPC, you make a really good plan.
This is Hey, everyone.
Podcasts, who is this? Yes. And we've been doing this for so long. Not an accredited university. Tickle see you make a really good plan. Let's say we're in a pocket,
so we're gonna see what we're gonna ask.
And we've been doing this for so far about 10 years.
We've seen two of you show.
Can I put my cards on the table for you guys?
Oh, straight.
Yeah, my dad got me a birthday card
and it says straight birthday.
So this is a birthday card for a straight son.
Straight son birthday. Well, they're making cards for everything now. card for a straight son. Straight son birthday.
Well, they're making cards for everything now.
That's a very specific.
No, I did it yesterday.
I got a bad haircut.
I said, I went to a haircut place.
I said, can you give me a bad one?
And they said, not a problem, my man.
And they gave me a bad one.
And it's been, first of all, I usually don't give a shit.
But this place, I've gone there, this is my third time going to this place.
I've had two good haircuts,
and the fact that I got a bad haircut, I just, I slept.
I took my eyes off the prize.
Well, it's hard with the headphones,
but it's just like, I just went too short.
I went too short on top, and I don't have,
I don't have like a ton of hair that I'm like,
go ahead and just chop whatever off.
There's like a very specific look that I can rock.
I don't say, I wasn't paying attention.
One, it doesn't look bad at all to me.
Two, if you're unhappy with it, can I ask,
is this the same barber I wanna say that you went to
where you said, when he said, tell me a joke, you said,
I gotta joke for you, then I'm gonna be fucking $10.
I did, yeah, this is the same place the same place
Okay, so we're putting this together. Yeah, do you think this was revenge?
This was a hundred percent on me because he he said what are we doing today and
I panicked and I said something completely different than I have said the last two times that I've been to this place because
In my look in my opinion if you've been to a place twice and you've already gotten two haircuts there, at that point, they should just know.
They should just be like, yeah.
We wrote down in our system what kind of haircut you get.
Give me a JPC.
And I'm gonna give you the thing that you normally got.
And I panic, when I don't have the language
to describe my haircuts, what I said was I was like,
take those clippers, run them all over my fucking head
and just go nuts, man.
JPC, can I give you a word of advice?
I'd love one.
One more.
I think.
That's it. Damn it. I
I have you thought about visiting in Central Illinois a little boutique
barberry called two-minute mics. I think I think I might have to go to two-minute
mics. How much is your hair cut at this place? My hair cut is $30 at this place.
$30. You could save $28. I have been to the airport maybe seven times
in the last couple of days, and I did go
on the way to the airport.
There is a hair cutterie, and there's a sign outside
that says, men in the haircut, $13, women's haircut, $16.
And I do kind of want to go in there and be like,
give me a women's haircut, I can afford it.
Yeah.
I'll take the $60 haircut.
My mother is a barber hair stylist in QAnne, Illinois,
and she just raised her prices for the first time
in like 20 years.
And she felt so bad about it.
She would raise it from like $10 to $15.
And she's like, I feel terrible.
I'm like, mom, you should have done this years ago.
You're still undercharging.
You're still undercharging.
You gotta do it.
When people are there, she's worth it.
She's worth it.
She's worth it.
She's worth it. She's worth it. She's worth it. I, when people are paying, when people are paying for a haircut, because I honestly think 30 bucks
is pretty cheap for a haircut,
but when people are under charge me for the haircut,
I always just like make up the difference on the tip.
Sure.
Because why not, right?
Like it doesn't, you know, it doesn't matter.
But I still tipped, I still tipped,
I think I tipped 30% of this haircut.
I think pretty good.
$10 on a $30 haircut,
even though they fucked it up,
but he didn't fuck it up.
He gave me a bad haircut that I asked for.
When that's the worst part, I just let that.
I just let that.
I truly, I truly did.
And it just, it goes to show, never take your fucking
eyes off the price.
You gotta keep your head again.
This is a lesson and nobody notices
what you notice about yourself.
Because I think you look great.
And I think that that's a really great haircut for you.
And I think you look totally normal and good think that that's a really great haircut for you, and I think you look totally normal and good.
Hey, but here's the caveat.
I do have headphones on over the part of my hair that they fucked up, or that is bad.
I am in a dark room, and I am far away, so I feel like you could barely see any of my
hair at this point.
But you are right.
You are correct.
No.
No.
No, I did not notice either.
My hope is that when I see you in person, I'm like, ooh, that looks like Russell Crowe and Glattie.
You're gonna see, don't give me wrong, nothing.
And I mean nothing would make me happier
than you getting a terrible haircut,
looking full.
But unfortunately, today is not that day.
I'm not laughing, I'm not throwing a parade from joy.
I'm sort of just a little disappointed
that I thought it was gonna see hilarious
like we haircut instead, you look great.
Now I feel bad for you guys,
but it does make me feel better.
So I will try at one point to give you a haircut worthy
of a total jackass.
I'll try to get something so fucked up and bad.
Reverse mohawk.
I miss your train robber mustache.
I miss your robot mustache.
I mean, I would like to see any day.
I haven't also growing up my beard.
And I think eventually I'm gonna cut it down,
but I do think that I'm gonna try to do something
really weird and funny with it before I do.
I was playing with making little like kind of like,
I wanna say goat horns but upside down.
And I do think that once I eventually shave it,
if I kept just that that it would look very funny
Almost like
Carried
Concers
Yeah
I'm down
These first riddles come from Danny
Hey all was that good? I was trying to shock you with the trans Erin to riddles. I'm still
Recovering from transitioning into riddles so quickly. I'm reeling.
It's like a cold plunge of reddles.
I'm just trying to shock the system.
And I, I mean, I, I know that I brought it up and there was no, you know,
implication that other people would, but I thought that at least the two of you
would mention how you have dog shit haircuts right now.
No, we look normal and good.
It was really something that I mean, I don't want to be rude, but
I dyed my hair black after my hair being red. I mean, I don't want to be rude, but a huge, filthy bitch.
I dyed my hair black after my hair being red for a couple years.
And a lot of people are like, kind of miss the red hair.
People are very bold in telling me that they miss my old hair color, but that's my big
hair update, Adel, anything to say?
Love you too.
Oh, great.
All right, so these come from Danny. Sorry, I'm talking to my testicles. Oh, great. All right, so these come from Danny.
Sorry, I'm talking to my testicles.
Oh, nice.
I've been a huge fan for the past three years,
since I discovered the pod.
I know how much y'all like wordplay,
so I made some puzzles for you.
The rules of the game are that it's four consecutive names
that create three different celebrity names back to back.
An example would be Anna Kendrick Lamar Odom.
Anna Kendrick, Kendrick Lamar Lamar Odom.
Okay.
So that's animal smith.
No, I'll give it a move to people and you have to guess the name.
Are you ready?
Very cool.
Yeah.
I like this.
A rocket man in a cinema cowboy get impersonated on whose line is it anyway?
John what was the Elton John Wayne Brady. Yeah, good job. Elton John Wayne night night
styles
The dark night right now. Oh, how
My brain a
YouTuber turned boxer says it's a bridge over troubled waters after getting rejected
from America's Got Talent.
This is Logan Paul Simon Pig.
Nope.
You're so close.
You're so close.
Logan Paul Simon Cowell?
Yeah.
Yeah.
Wait, Cowell got rejected on American Idol.
No, he did the rejected.
He does the rejecting.
He does the rejecting.
And he picked up the cowl.
He's Batman now.
Yes. He did the rejected. He does. He does. And he picked up the cowl. He's Batman now.
This person went from Mall Cop to a director of Titanic proportions, but there was always something about Mary.
Paul Blart Cameron. Plop, plop, plop, plop. Paul Blart Titanic fart.
What is that guy's name name Kevin James Cameron was the last is Got it. He carelessly whispered come on and slam and I've replied nope
Lionel Richie nope
Again George Michael
Jordan George Michael Jordan and most last clue? Nope. Peel. Peel. Keen Peel. Keen Peel.
Bob offered me a burger for $100,
but I requested a new deal.
Okay, that guy, what is his name?
H. John Benjamin Franklin.
Mm-hmm.
And then Franklin's the beginning of the last name.
H. John Benjamin Franklin.
Delta Roseville.
Yeah.
Can I say?
What's wrong?
No, this is this one.
This one.
Oh, here.
Here.
It's great.
This is one of where nothing's wrong.
I've been watching Bob's Burgers.
It's one of those things.
We like to put on a lot of the TV for spaghetti
because she doesn't like to hear any noise happening outside
and they've been cutting down a tree on our block this week.
And so she's very upset about that.
And so we've been putting on Bob's burgers for her.
And I'd never seen it, Mariah really liked it.
And I'd seen like some episodes of it, but I've been kind of just watching it from the beginning
as I come in and out of the room.
That's a very funny show.
Like it's a...
It is fantastic. It's a very funny show, like it is. It is fantastic.
It's a very well done show.
And I have to say, it marks the return, I believe,
of one of my favorite actors,
who for a while was faded into obscurity
and now plays the mayor of Buffburgers, Kevin Klein.
I love Kevin Klein.
Kevin Klein is a national fucking treasure.
And I feel like for like 10 to 12 years,
he just kind of, after like Orange County,
I feel like he disappeared. And he's back. just kind of, after like Orange County, I felt like he disappeared.
And he's back.
Yeah.
JPC, I've told you this so many times,
but you remind me so much of Kevin Klein.
Every time I see a clip of Young Klein,
I was hoping that she'd be.
That's a compliment.
I will say that it's been very fun to watch it.
Some of the episodes,
the first season don't really age well.
So, you know, yeah.
But on the whole, the show does,
and something that Mariah said, which is, I think,
is very cool, she was like,
one of the things that she likes about Bob's burgers
is that the family unit, which is central to Bob's burgers,
they all really love each other
and they don't really like shit on each other.
And if you watch the show, it is very true
that the family does like, they like yell at each other
or whatever, but they all have this like undercurrent
that they like love and care about each other.
Not the way I looked around the podcast,
but a very fun thing for a time.
It's really good to be your nervous system.
If you're going through a breakup
or having a hard time,
Bob's Burger is just a perfect binge, I think.
JPC, JPC, I agree that it's a nice premise to visit,
but I wouldn't wanna live there.
Exactly.
The other thing that I mentioned about Bob's Burger
is that I was looking up the voice actors
and seeing who was who,
because every episode has special guest stars.
And there's a character called Jimmy Pesto
who is like Bob's rival from across the street.
I couldn't place the voice that I looked it up.
And it's Jay Johnson, I can't remember if that's the best.
Oh, and they recast him or they killed off the character.
Yeah, they did that January 6th.
He was one of the January 6th guys.
He used to be on like Mr. Show and Sarah Silverman program, He'll be off the character because he was one of the January 6th guys.
He used to be on like Mr. Show and Sarah Silverman program and he was a January 6th guy and
then everyone on the show, I don't think he even got arrested but everyone on the show
was like, we don't want to work with him.
They recast that character.
I thought that was very funny.
This Laker had Carolina on his mind while emitting more carbon than any other celebrity.
So, uh, uh, uh, uh, LeBron James Taylor Swift. Wow.
A red light director has a career ending screen. And to make himself feel better,
he looked up sex gifts. Thank you, Casey. He's awake. He's alert. He's awake. He's caffeinated.
I miss the first chunk of him.
A red headed director had his career ended by a screen and make it feel better.
He looked at sex gifts. Martin? No. This is actually like a perfect.
Yeah, it's a perfect cancellation of Hey, Red of Red of Red of War.
Ron Howard Dean. We talked about this on the show in the...
Yes, Gifts.
...in the Patreon episode where I was going back
and pulling old tweets that you guys had done,
and this was an old tweet that was not one of you.
That was an actor from Breaking Bad.
And that is Mr. Dean Norris.
Dean Norris.
Dean Norris tweeted out famously sex gifts one time
as he was trying to search his hands.
That's outstanding.
Yes.
He kind of looks like Michael Chickles.
And that they're both like bald cops.
Bops, if you will.
Bops.
Um, and hope these weren't too easy or too obscure.
You're the best.
So thank you, Danny, for those.
I really enjoyed those.
Those, a billion more of those please. What if Danny?
Danny. I will always take any opportunity to remember that Dean Norris tweeted out sex
gifts. Thank you so much for your service.
All right. So similar, like similar part of your brain, I think you'll be using for
these. Oh, sorry, Aaron, this is embarrassing. Similarion.
Slam, slam's your shut.
I'm not coming out until you guys agree to be nice to me.
I'm serious.
I'm serious.
Aaron, we love you.
Bag.
And I didn't do anything and I didn't even get the reference
because I'm not a fucking nerd.
Okay, so these are from Taylor.
Hi, Taylor.
Thank you for writing these Taylor.
I call these bantanims.
Each clue contains antonims that when set out loud in reverse order correspond to the
name of a popular musician or musical group.
Here are a couple easy
ones as examples. Okay.
Tail video would be radio head. Tail video, radio head. So it's also, it's like reverse
to get inside out. Becon rule salt salt girl
Spice girls. Yeah hold on I'm the 90s. I loved is the salt girls
and cat living turns into
Dog dead dead dog busy dying
Mouse
What the opposite of cat is dog. Dead Mouse. Dead Mouse. What?
The opposite of cat is dog.
It's gotta be dog.
It can't be the opposite.
Most of these are from the 90s because I'm uncultured and basic.
I hope you enjoy.
Are you ready?
Hold on, hold on.
The opposite of cat is mouse.
Before we start, what would be a better opposite of mouse?
I mean, you can go vol, but that's pretty obscure.
I want to say dead mouse.
The opposite of mouse to me would be his rat.
No, that's two. They're in the same genus.
Yeah, the opposite of mouse is actually pretty hard.
Oh, that is. Owl.
Yo, owls a good one. Owl or Hawk would be very good.
The opposite of cheese.
Yeah, I guess it's really hard to,
I guess we were gonna have to define our opposites at this point.
The core feeds your answer on when you're excited.
Do you have like, kind of an answer?
I have my final answer.
Say we the jury.
To apologize, we the jury would like to apologize to Taylor.
Your answer is perfect.
Wow, coward, coward, coward, stupid.
Actually, you know what, fuck that.
I wanna see a scene.
Adel, we're gonna see a scene. You are gonna be playing the new superhero, uh, opposite mouse.
And, uh, there's a bank robbery, Aaron and I are, um, are, uh, people caught up in this bank robbery,
uh, innocent bystanders.
And opposite mouse just showed up in, uh, save the day.
And Aaron, we are struggling to describe what opposite mouse is.
Great.
Uh, let me get you two out of this building.
Ha ha!
Another job well done by opposite mouse.
Oh my...
Sorry, my catchphrases.
Oh, because the OM is on my chest.
Well, chest abdomen for act whatever you want to call it.
Sure.
Anyway.
Thank you.
Thank you. Thank you.
Well, before you go, would you like to leave a review?
I like to have the people I save, or rescue,
I'd like to have them leave a review
and be as descriptive as possible
about the moment I came in to save you.
So let's start with what you saw
when I entered the building to help you out.
I mean, you were great.
I don't know if can I say that up front is that we all we both like right? That's cosine
You're so good just more that is fantastic more specifics would be great sure
My wings here you've wings
Wings but he breach he brushed the back of his coat
So I do think that I think that those are just like,
I think it's like Tuxedo wings, I believe. Are you super vill? Super vill? No, your name is opposite
mouse. Opposite mouse, you're you're in you're good, right? Because you stopped obviously the bank
robbers who were. Honestly, I think it was a circumstance. We really think about it. Opposite mouse,
I think you would really love our friend who we want to set you up with how would you describe yourself oh my god yes you would be so perfect
for a friend who will tell you about later okay yeah we'll tell you about that
friend later yes I would describe my face as non-mousey I would describe my
appetite as lactose intolerant I would say no tail I'd say never get caught in
a trap I'd say I live in the opposite of a hole in the wall
So here's the thing opposite mouse. I feel like I feel like we know exactly who you aren't sure
But our friend who is very like attractive and successful
I think would be a very good match for you is really more interested in who you are like who is opposite mouse
Yes, I'll I who I am I am a resistant to poison. I am okay
I am friends with cats. I am not dirty at all
I am never a run. I never fed the snakes so we're gonna
Go to brunch. Oh
If we leave now, we're never gonna be able to set them up with our friend
oh i'm getting it now i'm getting it now
i'm so sorry i actually i actually i was thinking about Caitlyn i had Caitlyn in mind
oh my god he would
a lot
cuz they would be
yeah they'd be perfect
oh call her and describe me call her and describe me physically
okay
oh let's oh you stub your toe but he'll earn a scribe me color and describe me physically okay
let's go do stuff your toe she did
she did yes
okay hold on hold on i'm sorry i i need to listen to this a little bit longer
this is actually
cool this is
this is Caitlin's voice mail.
She's so funny.
This is her.
It'll beep in a second, but there's a little more.
Hello?
Hi, how are you?
She gets me every time with this.
Just kidding. I'm not at the phone.
Remember, I love being set up.
I'm Caitlin.
Beep. Just kidding. Yeah so we think you'd be perfect for
Caitlin because you're both fucking uneasier.
That was a big beep. Oh god damn it Caitlin.
See. Alright let's do these. I was a bat.
Oh, we're so sorry, could have just been Batman night veteran. I
Forget these are what are you doing?
Come on you guys please
veteran Dr. day
Night veteran night
day hippie
What is that?
Veteran what's the opportunity veteran would be day coward? What is that? What is that? What is that? What is that? What is that?
What is that?
What is that?
What is that?
What is that?
What is that?
What is that?
What is that?
What is that?
What is that?
What is that?
What is that?
What is that?
What is that?
What is that?
What is that?
What is that?
What is that?
What is that?
What is that?
What is that? What is that? What is that? What is that? What is that? But it's a member the words are switched to I need a new day new beginner day
Navaste not Navaste namaste. No, I'm a stay. It's a pretty famous band and
A way of saying that you're like very inexperienced green day fallout boy
All out boy for this game.
Girl lift down girl in
Oh spring spring girl. Oh girl
Yeah, girl spring spring spring fall out boy. I like just look out of the list being like
Oh my god, is that one For more fallout boy content check out
Bill Blood's pod we will
Buu
The soft more album of fallout boy this month
Oh for more content check out
sitcom D&D over in the head gumnet work
Really fun
How does that apply though?
It's just for more content
For more content open up a fucking web browser
type in anything
There's some content for your ads
Hit the news tab,
go fucking wild. Okay.
Land in big USA.
Land in big USA. Land in big USA. Land in big USA. Land in big USA. Land in big USA. Land in big USA. Land in big USA. Land in big USA. Land in big USA. Land in big USA. Land in big USA. Land in big USA. Land in big USA. Land in big USA. Land in big USA. Land in big USA. Land in big USA. Land in big USA. Land in big USA. Land in big USA. Land in big USA. Land in big USA. Land in big USA. Land in big USA. Land in big USA. Land in big USA. Land in big USA. Land in big USA. Land in big USA. Land in big USA. Land in big USA. Land in big USA. Land in big USA. Land in big USA. Land in big USA. Land in big USA. Land in big USA. Land in big USA. Land in big USA. Land in big USA. Land in big USA. Land in big USA. Land in big USA. Land in big USA.
Land in big USA. Land in big USA.
Land in big USA.
Land in big USA.
Land in big USA.
Land in big USA. Land in big USA.
Land in big USA. Land in big USA.
Land in big USA.
Land in big USA. Land in big USA.
Land in big USA. Land in big USA. that practically an opposite mouse. He can be featured on the podcast. I love it.
I'm happy with it.
I love it.
Land ambiguous.
Land specific sea.
I don't feel like that.
Pacific red.
No, land, what's the opposite of land?
Sea flight.
Yeah, but it's another thing saying sea.
Water.
Lake water. So that's a second word. And specific. No, no, no, thing saying see water. Mm-hmm Lake water. That's a second
word and specific. No, no, no, it's not water. You got it. Oh, see, see ocean. Another way
of saying see ocean. Yep. Okay, spray. No, any ocean. Mm-hmm. Yeah, ocean. Rather untangled. Merin five. No sister Hazel sister not. Remember it's that words are
switched to oh so it'd be loose sister twisted sister. Yeah it's got to be twisted
sister hell fucking yeah solid black. I gotta I want to see a scene we'll be
seeing a quick scene here. So Aaron you are trying to set me up with Adal.
And Adal is your twisted sister.
Hey, it's so nice to hang out with you outside of the office.
Thank you for trusting me.
Oh my God, of course, it's great to be here.
Oh, whoa, whoa, sorry.
It's always nice to hang with family.
Who is this?
I'm sorry, who is this? I'm sorry. Who is this?
I'm Jeff.
I work with Chris at the office.
Oh, I'm.
Sorry, this is my sister Claire.
Claire, I told you to Claire.
Claire, glad minutes before coming to the table.
I got nervous.
Also, I just was so curious.
Yeah, you came out of nowhere though.
That was kind of scary, huh, Claire?
Did you come from under the table, Claire?
I came from through the wall.
Now scientists say that if you throw a ball to wall enough times,
eventually the particles will line up to where they phase through it.
And I think we're starting to start.
I am not.
The scientist is my favorite cold-play song.
I hit the wall pretty hard the first few hundred times,
but the last time I made it through, I might be the first human to do so.
Hopefully that makes me appealing.
Yeah, I don't necessarily know.
I was not under the impression that this was a setup.
I thought it was just me and Chris were just gonna have
some, you know, after drinks, after drink,
after your eyes are enthralling.
Oh, thank, they might have changed
when I phased through the wall.
I think they're bleeding, they're bloodshot red.
Claire, are you, are your clothes inside out?
You're bleeding and your clothes are inside out
and your eyes are dead.
They must be, yeah, listen, again, I can't stress enough.
I don't think anyone's ever done this before.
And again, scientists say a ball, like a baseball.
So I don't think they're pretty free. You said that already. Can you believe it say a ball, like a baseball. So I don't think
that already you said that already. Did I? I'm there. So I don't know why we're ready
for this today. No, we are my sister. Okay. So today was not the day to set you up. I
think I was part of myself in the wall. Can you go get it? I'm good. You know what? Take
it by anything you want. It's on me. I'm gonna take care of Claire. No, yeah. It just so you know Chris, I'm married.
I feel like I-
Oh, fuck.
Yeah, I feel like I was pretty clear with that.
You're act married.
Well, my wife works with us.
Ginny, you know Ginny. Yeah, Ginny?
Ginny's your wife?
No way. Ginny's awesome.
Yeah, I know. That's why I mean mean she's here. She's here right now
Oh, can someone call a bambulance. What's it called bambulance?
Yeah, I call a bambulance. You're with this guy. No, it's okay. I did I called an ambulance. I called it
Maybe it's almost immediately
Yeah, Ginny's great. She calls the ambulance. We're gonna go
Solid black.
White mist.
Stripes.
White.
Stripes.
You got it.
Melted chocolate.
Solid.
First of all, chocolate.
First of all.
Remember the words are also reversed.
Melted chocolate.
Melted chocolate. the opposite of chocolate
Is solid the correct answer?
Ice vanilla ice. Yeah vanilla ice fall on
Fall on on spring off spring
Yeah, hold on hold on
Did you do it? Is that Osprey?
That's you did it. That's actually that actually is really good
I think if we played the intro to pretty fly for my guy I think I'm gonna go up and go up and go up and go up and go up and go up and go up and go up and go up and go up and go up and go up and go up and go up and go up and go up and go up and go up and go up and go up and go up and go up and go up and go up and go up and go up and go up and go up and go up and go up and go up and go up and go up and go up and go up and go up and go up and go up and go up and go up and go up and go up and go up and go up and go up and go up and go up and go up and go up and go up and go up and go up and go up and go up and go up and go up and go up and go up and go up and go up and go up and go up and go up and go up and go up and go up and go up and go up and go up and go up and go up and go up and go up and go up and go up and go up and go up and go up and go up and go up and go up and go up and go up and go up and go up and go up and go up and go up and go up and go up and go up and go up and go up and go up and go up and go up and go up and go up and go up and go up and go up and go up and go up and go up and go up and go up and go up and go up and go up and go up and go up and go up and go up and go up and go up and go up and go up and go up and go up and go up and go up and go up and go up and go up and go up and go up and go up and go up and go fully charged indignation. Okay. Um, uh, what do you do with three words?
What's the opposite of indignation would be out-dignation.
Which is what Lady Macreot says.
Uh-huh.
Out-dignation.
What happens when your phone's not fully charged?
Dead.
Mm-hmm.
Um, so indignation.
So, indignation, surprise, dead.
So... Uh, something dead. Mm-hmm So animation surprise dead
Something dead. Oh great full dead. Yes
Mommy pass
fart daddy. Oh Mariah gave me a mommy pass Daddy Mommy pass it's pass or play the opposite of passes play that mommy passes my favorite
Listen Jason today cuz really mm-hmm and then play daddy
Pat blank or daddy play daddy play daddy play daddy play daddy play daddy play
blank daddy
Play sugar daddy. What's the opposite of passes playing blank pass?
Run yeah, you got it.
Run, run, daddy.
Run, daddy.
Run DMC.
I don't know, yeah.
I said the word.
Puff, daddy.
Yeah.
Puff, daddy.
But whole repair.
This is my favorite one.
Oh, Aaron, I'm so sorry.
Are you okay?
What?
Yeah, I mean, it's incurable.
But whole repair.
Repair.
Um, we'll see opposite of But hold, repair. Repair.
We'll see the opposite of butthole mouth. Smash mouth.
Smash mouth.
I would love to see a quick scene.
This is going to be air in an adult.
You both work at a butthole repair shop
and you're just like manning the phones
taking intemming calls.
But again, it's been a pretty slow day.
Well, thank you for calling, Donnie and Donnie! Butthole Repair! How can we help you?
Yeah, your website says 9-5, is that your hours?
Yeah, but to be honest with you, we sort of fuck off at 4pm every day because we're tidal looking at buttholes, right, Donnie?
That's right!
Understandable, okay, thank you so much.
Oh, wow.
Thank you.
Oh, Donnie and Donnie's butthole repair, how can I help you?
Oh, I'm sorry, did I call a butthole repair store?
Oh, do you got a bone to pick with me?
No, I was, do you guys do kitchen sinks?
Well, we do everything but.
That's our motto, actually, everything but.
We can put a stint in your asshole if it's pro leapsed
No, my cousin's got a kitchen sink stuck in his ass. Well, I guess I'll call somewhere else. Thank you. Hold on hold on. Oh
Hey
Hello Donnie and Donnie but over pair how can I help you today?
Just the mail man just delivering your mail
How can I help you today? Just a mail man just delivering your mail
Uh, that we don't know what we got mail man
I don't go through it
Open the mail and read all out
Read open the mail and read it aloud
Mr. Mailman
Okay
This one is from the IRS
Uh, it says that you owe, it says that you owe 14,000 dollars
I have a debt that's a dope email
Internal rectal system, rectum system
I don't think so.
Anyway, here's the mail, I'll just leave it here. Thank you.
Ah, look at him walk away, he needs work done.
Dany and Dany, butthole repair, how can I help you?
Yes, I would like to schedule a butthole repair.
Oh perfect, how is today in five minutes for you?
I'm sorry, I live out of state, I don't know that I can do, I don't know that I can do today.
What state?
I guess I'm in a state of denial right now that I'm uphold these repairing.
Yeah, of course.
So I guess I need to be talked into it.
Of course, well, there's a few things we could do.
We can put a stent in.
We can also fill it up with plaster of Paris.
Now that will prevent any leakage that will prevent any discomfort and then you can kind of take the
What we would call a butt plug in and out depending on if you're you know at the movies or if you're home in the bath
Sure those are the only two options you can use the plug for
Should I describe the extent of the problem or are those are just two blank solutions that will work for any problem?
Tell him to come in.
We need you to come in and I do ask if you don't mind not to describe it.
I do get a little queasy around but hold talk.
Sure. I was just in the mailman.
Read that mail.
You can read that, man. You can see. Uh, air, air, like air, like air to the throne, washed fresh.
Air, washed fresh.
So that would be dirty.
Uh-huh.
Dirty, what's the opposite of it?
Dirty peasant?
Dirty prince.
Dirty prince.
Dirty prince.
He just was my prince.
Someone who is not going to be the air and maybe he was had out of your marriage.
Dirty Dirty. Old dirty bastard. Old dirty bastard.
Thank you, Taylor, for those and on that note, let's go on a break.
No. Why? We were on a break.
Hey, JPC, you know how I love he looks sleep. I love that he looks mattress brand. Yeah, best nights sleep of my life. I know not everyone is on board yet. So I secured
a word-winning sleeper. Merrill sleep. She's right behind that door, Merrill sleep.
Wow, she won the Golden Pillow for best sleep.
That's right.
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Who do you who who did I think you were?
I don't know
Merrill I'm Merrill sleep and I know everybody is unique and everybody sleeps differently
I just
Recommend taking the Helix sleep quiz and you can figure out what
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I don't think I thought you were the person that she's doing out.
What a, what a performance.
He looks mattresses all come with a 10 to 15 year warranty depending on the model.
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Go ahead and give her the Academy of Snorr.
The Snorr?
Academy of Snorr?
You know what? Give me an Academy of Snorr. and give her the Academy a snore, a snore? Academy a snore?
You know what?
You mean the Academy is gnawing.
Glit close to falling asleep, that's why I got you.
Oh yeah, I got that a lot.
Hey Adel, hey, Aaron, I got a bone to pick
with the two of you.
Sure, yeah, I wore the skeleton outfit
just cause I figured this was coming.
Happy Halloween a few months early.
It's not yet.
What is it?
So you know how the two of you I was like guys
I am always so hungry for lunches and dinners and the like and you
Jokers told me oh JPC. It's okay. All you have to do is take some you know
American paper currency tape it to your front door close the door and then wait until someone brings you food
Well, I kept opening the door, and the money was gone.
So I had to take more money to my door.
I think you're thinking, didn't work at all.
Oh, door cash.
Door cash.
Yeah, you did door cash.
We told you door dash is the number one thing to you.
What the hunk?
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so you can chop everything your your kids, your dogs,
your family, might need for back to school.
And hey, personally, just yesterday, I bought some Marsha's homemade premium quality buck
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I just got those from DoorDash and they were on my porch within 20 minutes and it's
very dangerous because they're delicious.
Did you fill your belly and your pantry?
Yes.
Did you fill your backpack?
I did.
Okay, well then DoorDash has come again for the gold.
I remember distinctively the stress of going back to school
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would have loved to have door dash so she could be prepared before the big back to school
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At all, JPC keeps eating my gel pens.
Thanks, DoorCash.
I mean, no, that's the one.
That one didn't work.
That one's bad.
Hey, GPC.
Yeah.
You're not in trouble.
I just need help.
I'm, um, pranking at all.
And I'm setting up a website to prank him.
I just need some advice.
This podcast is sponsored by Squarespace.
I'm not, I'm not mad at you.
We're pranking at all.
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Hey, Edel, come here. Come here. Come here. Hey, what's what's going on?
I actually, I want to prank JPC and I want to set up a whole website to prank him.
Do you have anything that like is there like an online store?
Like it set up on my website to sell products?
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What is happening?
Okay.
Wait, what's going on with Addle?
Oh, nothing, nothing.
I'm just sending up a very normal Squarespace website,
not a prank thing, new, and he's gonna tune you.
And I'm gonna use analytics.
Use insights to grow my business
and learn where my site visits and sales are coming from.
That's pretty cool.
I'm gonna improve my website
and build marketing strategy based on top keywords
are popular products and content
on my prank website, the prank activity.
Whoa, that's awesome, Aaron.
I'm glad you're using Squarespace.
Did you say what the website was for?
I can't remember what the website was for.
I'm gonna put the website was for I can't remember what's the website for
Frank Squarespace
You can connect to your store to vetted third party tools to extend the functionality of your website
Hey JPC hey JPC. What's up, battle? I can't believe we pranked Aaron with our little boy routine dude
We got her anyway if you want to prank Aaron with your little boy routine,
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And when you're ready to launch, go to squarespace.com,
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Oh, she's back, she's back.
Hey, Aaron.
Hey, Aaron.
Can we go to grandma's house?
Wait, I've been pranked.
But how? I don't know
Hey Aaron hey JPC notice anything different
Let me turn around for you. No, oh you've got that professor-quirl thing where you have a face on the back of your head.
Getting warmer?
Okay, what is different about you?
Let me bend over and pick up my keys I dropped.
Oh, you got a bad butt haircut.
Uh-huh, well I got my butt hole repaired and they trimmed it while I was down there.
That's cool.
When my dog had dental work, I had them trim her nails as well.
Mm-hmm.
Kind of like an all in one.
Aaron, jealous?
Uh, yeah.
Aaron, look at this.
Aaron, look at this.
Look at this.
So JPC, if I bend down in front of you
and open to my mouth, you can see Aaron.
Whoa, yeah, and it's kind of like a kaleidoscope
where she's all kinds of different colors.
That's very cool. Yeah. That should be a thing. Whoa, yeah, and it's kind of like a kaleidoscope where she's all kinds of different colors.
That's very cool.
That should be a thing.
Okay, interesting.
Now, honestly, I can see that I can see that without looking through you, too, so that
might just be like an eye thing that I've got going on.
Did you know that's what the Beatles song I'm looking through you is about?
Damn, dude, I didn't know that.
It's about when you go getting as butthole repaired and they could see right through
from the asshole to the mouth.
When I woke up today, I told God I was determined
not to learn a thing and here I am,
not seven and a half years later and I've just learned something.
And God is what you call Mariah.
Yes.
Can you guys see something in my eye?
No.
Yeah, Aaron, you got a bunch of fucking pretty in there.
What's going on?
Oh.
I see. I see the oceans.
Um, that was completely useless.
They are useless.
We're not a mirror.
Oh, but I can't why not?
Just do what I do.
I think Aaron, if we can't see what's in your eye, that's a problem with your webcam.
It's not us.
Um, I think I see an Iris.
Great. I think I got it.
I think I blinked whatever is out.
All right. Well, bye.
No way. You're in.
Wait, what?
Oh, sorry. We still have to go.
Okay. Yeah, we still have to go.
These are from Graham. Thank you, Graham.
Um, you made a joke this past Wednesday's episode.
This was a while ago. um, about Billy Joel,
lyric riddles and then said, somebody will do that now.
I'm not somebody. Wow.
I hope you know the lyrics to these songs pretty well,
because otherwise you won't get the answers.
Graham, I remember making this joke when I don't know Billy
Joel's long story. Well, I know once I hear him, okay,
you might be able to get these as my hunch. How come the uptown girl has never tried multi-grain toast? Because she's been living
in her white bread world. Wow. Pretty good. Pretty good. Okay, so that's when Sergeant O'Leary
gets his new car, he will find five Kathy comics inside. Why?
Because he's driving a cattle,
which is Kathy's famous phrase.
Because Sergeant O'Leary is walking the beat.
No, no, no, no, no.
Okay, the beat.
Adelaide, you happy or do you feel nothing?
I am thrilled.
Okay.
This is all episode. All the riddles are just right
in my wheelhouse.
That's great.
That's great.
It's nine o'clock on a Saturday.
The regular crowd shuffles in.
There's an old man sitting next to me.
Oh wait, he's being expelled from the bar.
Why?
Cause he took his dim dirty penis out.
And he waved it around the damn bar. Cuz he took his dim dirty penis out The bar
Went to see that
Cuz we've all seen a pair of balls and dick
No one is in person. I don't know this this old man who's nursing is whiskey and rye
I know that right or something like that
This old man who's nursing is whiskey and rye. I know that right or something like that
Adel, do you know it? Can I hear one more time?
It's nine o'clock on a Saturday. The regular crowd shuffles in. There's an old man sitting next to me
Oh, wait, he's being now he's being expelled from the bar. Why is it something with gin?
Drinking his tonic he's being toxic for making love to his tonic and gin. That's right.
Making love to his tonic and gin.
Wow, Bill, Joel is like a musical Bob Dylan.
I would like to see a scene.
Adel, you have just discovered that JPC,
your husband is having an affair,
and you're slowly putting the pieces together
that it's with a cocktail.
Frank, can I talk to you?
Yeah, I mean, it's pretty late. I Frank, can I talk to you?
Uh, yeah, I mean, it's pretty late.
I was just gonna hop in the shower and then head to bed.
But yeah, you, what did you need to talk about?
This can't wait till tomorrow.
No, it can't.
The last few nights you've hopped in the shower after being at work late?
I like to do night showers now.
I think I'm getting into night showers.
I'm gonna be a night shower guy.
Yeah, you texted me time for another hours
and one, I hate that and two.
I think there's something going on.
Every time you come home,
you have a stain on the front of your shirt.
Okay, well, that's because I do not know
how to clear the shirt.
So I feel like I am washing it,
but whatever I'm doing is not getting the stain out.
And honestly, glad you brought it up. We'd love to talk to you about that tomorrow because I am washing it, but whatever I'm doing is not getting the stain out and honestly
Glad you brought it up would love to talk to you about that tomorrow because I am pretty beat so
What's up on my breath
Okay, is that whiskey? Here's the thing
There was a free distillery tour happening at work today. What's it? So what's that what's his name?
Jim Jim His name? Jim
Jim
His name is Jim
Jim being it's his name is Jim being
Yeah, I am I don't know I mean yes, I'm having a
Midlife thing I'm not gonna call it Christmas because it doesn't feel bad and I met someone at work who happens to be a
bottle of whiskey and
we are
Hitting it off. I mean, I don't know what I don't know what's all you does not mean anything for our relationship
Every day for the last five years. I've walked in on you masturbating furiously
To John Hampton.
Hey, baby, you ready to go for a ride?
I'm sorry, that's Jim.
No, I really want to hear what I was masturbating to because it's on the tip of my tongue.
Like, I remember this happening, but you said every day.
I was going to say all the solo Don Draper scenes in Mad Men
when he's just in his office pouring himself a drink.
First of all, try to watch anything with John Ham in it and not want to jack off a little bit,
okay? The guys are good looking man. I was watching a progressive commercial the other day and I
said, hey I might have to freaking beat my little some of my stuff. Invite a man, I want to meet him.
I want to see the man. Okay, Jim, hey Jim. Jim, can you turn off the car? Can you come inside?
Where are his arms? Beep, beep, beep, beep.
Just...
Okay.
Baby, mwah.
Oh.
Oh, go go go.
I mean, I'm the...
Right on the label, on the label.
I'm the mail man, I mean.
No, Jim, it's okay.
Read the mail.
It's okay.
It's okay.
We're caught.
They know all about the affair.
It's time to come clean.
You look watered down to me.
Wow.
Let's not make this personal. Let's not say things about the regret.
How much more do you have in you, huh?
Five ounces? This isn't good.
You can do a lot with five ounces.
You can do a lot with five ounces.
That's sad. It's sad.
You're sad.
I am sad.
You know what? I don't need this.
I don't need this.
No, Jim, please stay.
Okay. Look, Jim loves me and I have proof.
Well, Jim has proof.
I want to say...
How much proof?
I don't know.
I'm a 80.
Are you two going to a mixer?
Are you taking him to a mixer right now? Gemini are gonna meet up with Jack and slam
So that was in the drink book in the D section of Addels pond anything was the list on coke
Oh, you have a few more. Do you want me to read oh can you sorry? Can you open up this snake? Sorry the book still open? Yeah
Here's the snake one
What did what did the snake say as a sarcastic response?
Anaconda?
Okay.
Kind of a pun and more like, I don't know.
Yeah, that's a fucking way of words.
Can we give it to him?
Okay.
Okay, long time listener, first time caller, more like a similar I can't got a white text on my phone
Sorry, I'm doing a lot of space bars to separate answers note. Oh space bars. I love no Brooks
It can be this is technically they said maybe a warm up reddle, but I think that okay
It can be under it can be over
But it can never be by itself. Where? Where? No. Where under?
We're over. Where by itself? Hey, I don't grow up. Not everything's about underwear.
I'll grow up. What about Captain Underpants? That's exclusive. What about when powder
toast man squats down to the fly and he gives a little poop What is this it can be under can be over but it can't can never be by itself. What is it?
It can be under it can be under it can be over but it can't be on itself by itself by itself
itself, but you why?
Under course, of course
Of course,. Of course not. Of course not.
I mean same.
That means same question with Ron.
The over under makes me think of betting like a spread on a game.
Does that have anything to do with betting?
No.
Be over, it can be under.
I thought that was Adel was maybe close that it might be like a word play of like a word
that goes with both over and under but doesn't go with itself. Like, I don't know what that word might be like a word play of like a word that goes with both over and under, but doesn't go with itself.
Like, I don't know what that word would be.
Overcooked, yeah.
Overcooked, undercooked, cooked itself.
You're getting close.
Over easy, under easy.
Also your audio's cut out for a second, so you may have gotten it, but you've been down
under, over, down over, down itself.
It can't be on its own.
Yeah, it doesn't. It's like something that can be connected
to those two words, but isn't a word on its own.
I see over estimate, over, does the word come before
after over and under?
Oh.
Is it like a one-to-one?
I'm sorry, Aaron, are we boring you?
After, after.
It's after.
Over easy, over educate, over done. These are all words that exist. After after it's after over
Easy over educate over done. These are all words that exist over
Over Exam we have a first of all I think it's gonna be easier at all we get their backwards
We start thinking of some words that don't exist. How about this?
Framp
Under You're gonna go bit framp Crab it up under your mouth
Can we get a fucking hand what's a fucking hit for this area come on? I'm feeling very blank
Very you are answering really really quickly. I I would feel blanked over blanked with your response Joyed overjoyed over
Well, well Yeah overblanked with your response. Joyed. Overjoyed. Over. That's so much. Uh.
Well, well.
Well.
Yeah.
Well, being well is nothing.
Is your like my acting back there.
I was acting over while.
I did Aaron.
Aaron, I really liked your acting.
Did you like my acting back there?
I'm not underwhelmed.
Exactly.
Go ahead.
Did you like my acting back there?
Is exactly what Jim Carey said on the set of
Ace Ventura Pet Detective when he knew his famous, but whole talking. Did you like my acting back there is exactly what Jim Carey said on the set of Ace Ventura pet detective when he knew his famous but whole talking.
Um, did you like my acting back there?
Is it set up for Adel to say underwear?
Um, you can overwhelm, you can underwhelm, but you can never just wham.
And those are from Emmanuel Grant.
Thank you, Emmanuel.
That rule.
I love that one.
That's a great riddle, I think.
That's a very good one.
I mean, you'll, I know that you intended that to be a warm-up
Riddle, but I got to say pretty good cool down riddle as well. I now feel like I can move from the riddle pool to the
Riddle hot tub and then and then I'll be fine temperature-wise.
Hey men. So can we do I don't know this is so stupid so weird so dumb.
Two voicemails. So can we do I don't know this is so stupid so weird so dumb to voice males I think you'll get birdie that number 1 805 riddle one and if you have a voicemail theme
sit it to us hrpodcast.com you might get it featured on the show.
I can't wait for these voicemails.
Hey guys, I have a recurring dream where I'm like driving around the eastern part of
Washington DC and like killing time before I have to get
to Reagan for a flight.
And usually I stop for like Chinese food and sometimes I like check out a used bookstore.
Is that a riddle?
What do you think that means?
Thank you.
Oh boy.
Hmm.
Well, and the famous words of Reagan, let me start by saying, well,
I don't think so.
I think that you're craving freedom and peace
or you're beaming to your another life
that you are living only at night.
And then someone gets murdered.
It's you from your other life
and you have to solve your own murder.
Sorry, I need to get my big type writer out
and start writing this screenplay.
Ignore me.
Wow.
It's like the piano from Big, but a typewriter.
It really is a big typewriter.
Yeah, I have to use my legs.
She's calling over an old man
and they're typing together.
Yeah, I guess I would say maybe fly out of Dolas.
I know it's like, you know, it's like 40 minutes further away,
but it's maybe you got you avoid the dream basically
I always call it d'lay
Ooh, yeah, d'lay Hills airport
His private airport
Okay, Chinese Chinese food
What in a bookstore what comes to mind with Chinese food?
Fortune cookie famous in American invention
Can I say yes? I got Chinese food while I was in Washington DC and I ate my fortune cookie and there
was no fortune in that.
I think that's the first time that's ever happened to me in my life where I did not find
a fortune cookie.
I think it's funny that the bad side is going to die.
No, I think it's because when you live in Washington DC, you're not technically in a state.
So I think that they can't legally put fortune cookies in the fortune.
I think a lot of people are trying to make that a state.
Uh-huh, uh-huh.
When I said, ooh, you're gonna die.
I made me think of Axel Rose.
Do you know what you are?
You're watching TV.
Why should you do me?
I'm saying.
I would like if people, you know how everyone's always like,
don't describe your dreams to people they don't care.
I care.
Please call in and describe your dreams to us.
We should do a whole episode.
If you have a weird one.
A stupid dream.
Hey, Aaron, I gotta say, we did an episode, like maybe two episodes ago where we talked
about dreams a lot in a ton of people called to tell us about their dreams.
And I deleted all of those messages.
No, no, no.
Call back.
You did that.
Call back and re-record it.
Wait, didn't this guy say he had a dream?
Yeah, this person did say that they had a dream.
One got through. So what else Chinese food? A book store. What else is in book store? Tomes.
He's books. Grim Wars.
Fortune knowledge. Fortune knowledge. Fortuneado. Fortuneado famously from
Fortune knowledge fortune auto fortune auto famously from I want to say something
cigar cigar a fishy that oh cigar a fishy anato our first nigger cut his thumb off yes
Balina Mm-hmm Balinese
Trades on time. How to train your dragon on time.
Dragon.
He's doing it.
He's doing it.
Longin' Stan, adult videos.
Adult videos.
Wow.
So it sounds like maybe what you want is you want to pour.
That'll start committing.
Yeah.
It's like a shortcut.
I will say, no, that is not a riddle.
Thank you for your question.
Your honor.
Okay, great.
Next voicemail.
Hi, McElroy brothers.
My question.
I need a little advice.
My partner and I just moved into a new place.
I was wondering if you have any advice on how to keep motivated on trying to unpack.
Thank you very much, Justin, Travis and Griffin.
I look forward to hearing your advice.
Thank you.
Oh my God, I'm so embarrassed.
They called the wrong podcast.
Wow.
I think I actually think that their phone number is 1, 805,
riddled two.
So I believe that it is just a honest mistake. Yeah, and if anything, I think I actually think that their phone number is 1 805 riddle two. So I believe that it is just a honest mistake.
Yeah, and if anything, I'm a Clint.
Um, me too.
I'm a Clint Howard though.
Ice cream.
Um,
pool.
What was making a game?
Whoever unpacks the most boxes gets to decide what take out you order.
Mm-hmm.
That's good.
I like that. Um, I would say order. That's good. I like that.
I would say unpack each other's stuff and get rid of the stuff
that you don't think that person should have anymore.
Yeah, I like that.
You throwing away your partner's stuff
that's at least gonna lead to a fun conversation.
Which is what I like to call a big fight.
Yeah.
Yeah, I would say if you want to make like unpacking fun, there has to be
sticks.
So here's what I'll say.
You have to buy a stick.
I will execute a hostage every 30 minutes.
I'm working from die hard.
It's actually, it's actually Air Force one.
What's the bad air force one? It's a Air Force One. What's the bad name of Air Force One?
It's a...
Steep ocean.
Garriolbin.
So anyway, I'll execute a hostage every 30 minutes
until the entire house is unpacked.
Let's see, we are recording this.
Blah, blah, blah, it's miss.
And so good luck to you because these hostages...
It's a huge minute.
I missed a doctor's appointment today.
Oh man.
And also check out Taz.
Manian devil, living to a new chest.
I know you haven't fully unpacked
for moving into your house a couple years ago.
What's a way you, what's something that would motivate you?
I'm so sorry, what am I doing?
What would motivate me, maybe moving into a different house?
Yeah, let's move again.
Yeah, okay.
Uh-huh, yeah.
Take it.
Are you like an unpack right away?
Well, when you guys get home from vacation, what happens to your suitcase?
Does it sit there for a couple days?
Like, what's going on?
I don't buy a suitcase.
I only take what I could eat.
An eye.
An eye. a suitcase. I only take what I could eat. And I shove my suitcase in the corner by a new
suitcase for my next trip and start to fill that up for the voyage.
You really solved the mystery of why your backpack was made of twizzlers when I saw you.
I am a big, I am the biggest, as soon as I get home unpack and put everything back in
its same place and then do a load of laundry with all of my dirty clothes. I'm a big, I am the biggest, as soon as I get home unpack and put everything back in its same place and then do a load of laundry with all of my dirty clothes.
I'm a big, getting it all out of the way immediately.
It must be nice.
Nope, it's not good.
I can't say it is.
Whereas I get home from a trip,
I dump all my stuff on the floor, six months go by
and I go, I should really get to that.
Another six months go by and I say,
did I not do this already? Another three months go by and I go I should really get to that another six months go by and I say did I not do this already another three months go by and
Gemma says hey those clothes have been on the floor for a year and a half can you do something about it and I yell at her and say we're getting divorced
Three more months go by and I say Gemma please take me back and she goes if you clean off the floor and I
Refuse to do it so Gemma and I are divorced and uh
Whoa whoa so much happened. Yeah, is that why you wore dirty clothes to your divorce party?
Um.
Um.
That's why I got the dirty D.
Beyond dreams, can I make another, uh,
Boy Smell Request?
Absolutely.
You're calling and asking us for advice.
Mm-hmm.
I would love just ones if someone called in and gave just pretty standard good
advice. Like what hot tip trick life hack do you have? Call in with the advice that you
love to give people. Is there a certain way you get cheap plane tickets? Is there a certain
way you motivate yourself? Something like some I want some sort of life hack. I want to
learn from you. I don't know shit you guys.
I'm a mess.
I need your help.
It's gonna be around, keep it around 30 seconds.
That's good.
Yeah.
Always buy plane tickets on a Tuesday night,
never buy them on a Friday.
Yeah, okay.
This is the type of shit I'm talking about.
Here's my thing.
Always buy plane tickets last minute
because that's when you're gonna get
the very best prices and they're gonna be very nice to
you. Famously?
Uh-huh.
Well, uh, Addle, anything to plug?
What does that suppose to mean?
I'm so sorry, sir.
Anything to plug?
He just got his butt plugged.
I'm so sorry.
Are you making fun of my butthole repair?
No, it's so good.
It looks good.
No, it's so good.
It looks good.
Thank you. I would like to recommend Donnie and Donnie's
but whole repair shop. What was the phrase that was anything but I think that was the joke
I made. But the kitchen sink. Thank you. Err, anything you would like to plug? I would
like to plug sitcom D&D. You can find it anywhere you find podcasts.
Um, DPC, can you, I don't know, this is gonna sound crazy.
Just like give up your plug time to read a five star review
from our show.
I don't even want the fucking plug time,
but I will say that if you want to listen to part two
of Aaron's camp, Solve Away, you can go to patreon.com slash.
Hey, we're don't riddle and listen to that this Friday.
Here is a review from FireVex. Fire Vex says, Hey, awesome, awesome. More like it. My name
is Ryan. I've been listening to Hey Rital Rital since the beginning. I'm a Patreon subscriber
too, which means that Ryan will be able to listen to part two of Camp Solve away.
I've driven across the country during the pandemic, re-listened to a lot of the show and it helped
me keep me in high spirits. I even want to try improv.
Everything you guys put out makes my day that much better now, that that's out of the
way.
I do have a podcast of my own called This Is How We Feel.
It's a movie podcast with four hosts, where every week we take a piece of media, usually
movies, break it down, and tell you how we feel.
You can find us at RustyNinjaStudios.com, Spotify and Apple Podcasts as well.
This is how we feel.
I hope you guys read this one. I hope you guys read this one
Another show I heart monkey bones
It's little monkey bones. That is the last time I get tricked and to renegade plug for someone else's podcast
It's gonna be the last time you get tricked. I think you should all go for it. Terrible idea
Oh, sorry. Well, here's something I'll say to you, B.C.
Maybe if they're doing a movie podcast, maybe they're saying that they love the 1990s
Chris Katan, Brendan Frazier, vehicle monkey bone.
I think they probably just pluralized it, but what they wanted to say was Frazier's back
baby.
That was the time to go rewatch monkey bone.
Is Brendan Frazier doing doing a Fraser reboot?
Yes.
He's about to love that.
Take all my money. Take all my money.
Tossed mommy and send something to scrambled eggs.
Well actually that Fraser reboot not only did they have Brendan Fraser attached,
it's actually pretty big casting news that Aaron I think that you wanted to share on the podcast.
Mmm hmm.
Okay please. You better. Bye forever. Share on the hot test Okay Now are you parent in the music video? I'm not saying it's a video. I'm not saying it's a video.
Photo created by M.O.B. Cargamous
and M.O.N.D. Boris.
I'm not saying it's a video.
I'm not saying it's a video.
I'm not saying it's a video.
I'm not saying it's a video.
I'm not saying it's a video.
I'm not saying it's a video.
I'm not saying it's a video.
I'm not saying it's a video.
Sorry, my snake's not home.
He went to the shed.
Okay, what?
To the shed. The, what to the shed?
The aquarium. No, that's a shit.
Hey there cool campers and know it all little siblings. If you like that you are gonna love this week's Patreon
It's part two the thrilling conclusion of our Patreon stretch goal camp solve away
You can listen to that plus our entire Batcadilog at patreon.com
such a riddle riddle by joining the clue crew for five dollars a month or the review crew for eight dollars a month.
Plus you get those out for your episodes. See you there!