Hey Riddle Riddle - Patreon Preview #290: Good Ol’ Improv

Episode Date: September 27, 2024

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Hey, I'm Jake Johnson, host of the podcast, We're Here to Help. But this episode right now that you are listening to is sponsored by Brooklinen. Brooklinen provides luxury bedsheets, pillows, comforters and blankets delivered straight to your door. How do I know this? Because Brooklinen delivered me a quilt sheets, pillowcases, and I love them. Plus, Brooklinen has been tested and awarded by experts, including Good Housekeeping, GQ, Wirecutter and the host of We're Here to Help.

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Get 15% off your first Brooklinen order and save extra when you bundle. Adel, you taught improv. JPC, you taught improv? Exactly with that tone. So did either of you ever have this in your curriculum? Mm-hmm. So you've had to teach it before. Yeah, I think level five at IO was almost always forms.

I did 4B. And so it's up to the team. That was when I did it, but yeah. Maybe it was 4B. They changed it a few times, but I almost always had autonomy to pick whatever forms I wanted. And I feel like Slacker, LaRonde, and GTS Brown were three that I typically leaned towards. GTS Brown is famous because it is like 50 rules and like devices you can use. What is, did you say Slacker?

Slacker, mm-hmm. What is that? So Slacker is, it's based off of a, who's the guy who directed Boyhood and Elephant and Gus Van Zandt. It's based on a Gus Van Zandt movie called Slacker. And basically the form is you have two people in a scene. It's similar to La Ronde.

You have two people in a scene and then there's a third person who's like kind of in the background. So it might be a high school student, a principal, and then like a janitor who's mopping in the background who just chimes in every once in a while with a little tidbit or something. Oh, interesting.

And then the next scene, you follow the third person. So it's basically like if the principal and the student were like the meat and potatoes, the janitor's like the garnish, like the parsley on the dish. Oh, I love that. So you follow the parsley, and you make the parsley of the steak. So you're making a tertiary background character, put them in the forefront to flush them out more.

Should we just do that instead? So it's very similar to Laron. What sounds more interesting right now, guys? Hey, Erin, if you thought that we were going to be able to get through an episode of just two-person scenes without another person running on as a silly waiter, I don't know, I got a bridge I can sell you. Well, I'm convinced.

I, let's do La Ronde another episode. I wanna try Slacker. Well, we're improvisers, we can pivot. That sounds so fun and I'm, that sounds appealing to me. So, let's, the first, our first suggestion is a landowner. Well, Erin, are you sure that you want us to just go with slacker because we also, I also was a teacher and I have some pretty fun forms as well that I could.

No, I don't want to know any of the cursed forms that you taught. You don't want to hear about jerky boys? No, my mind is pure. Also, fuck you, now you have to make up a form called jerky boys. You're digging your own way. Easy, easy. Make it up. Okay, fuck you, now you have to make up a form called Jerky Boys. You're digging too, man. Easy. Wow.

Make it up. Easy. Okay, so it's a crank call form. No, no, no. Wait, isn't that called cranking? Okay, who wants to be the side dish first? I can be the side dish. And so Adel, our scene suggestion is landowner. Perfect.

All right, Beverly. When they blow the whistle, we have to run as fast as we can across the border into Oklahoma and stake our claim. All right, but keep in mind, I rolled my ankle, and I have a little cough. And it's the old time time and a cough can turn into a death yeah you know that's right road your ankles that from basketball

or it's from chasing a horse that was loose yeah basketball horse basketball oh I'm sorry yes of course it was basketball that I was chasing you know are we and I know Like we keep talking about this. We've been walking for what two years About two years. Yeah, and I love Oklahoma. It's beautiful. I love it Are we sure we kept walking we wouldn't find something's better? Are we sure that this is the best? Well, yeah. Beverly, you're absolutely right.

We should, you know, sort of kick the hooves, an expression we use at old time of days because cars weren't better. And what we do for fun on a Friday night. Kick the basketball. Let me unfurl the map here. And as you can see from this map, which is the most recent of cartography maps,

after Oklahoma, it's just the ocean. It just sort of drops off and it's the absolute ocean. Yeah, I just wonder, should we get a seaside property? I don't know. I mean, Oklahoma is great. I'm sure everyone in 200 years will agree. Oklahoma, best state. Yeah, prime real estate. Absolutely. Thriving cities. Great place to be. I'm probably insulting some people by this, but I'm sure it'll be on everyone's top three places to visit in the world. I'm sure of it.

But what if we just kept walking for a little while? What if we got basketball and I laid on top of it and we walked, I don't know, another year, 18 months? And thank you for not sitting on basketball because he's not really a riding horse. He's more of a bed, he's more of a movable bed. Yeah, well let me... Sorry folks, just a couple more minutes. I'm just going around letting all the settlers know, the gun that we fire off to make sure that it's time that everybody rushes into Oklahoma, we lost the musket ball. It rolled around here somewhere and it's a field, so we only have the one. Idiot nephew. So it'll just be a couple more minutes while we find the musket ball. Can it be a finder-keeper situation? Just sit tight.

Because this is worth a lot of money. No, we need that musket ball, or else Oklahoma stays closed forever, which, oh boy. Oh, bye. We'll keep an eye out. We'll keep an eye out for sure, for sure. Well, Beverly, I'd be willing to, I mean, what's, based on two years of walking, what's another year and a half?

I'd be willing to walk an extra year and a half, perhaps. I have the musket ball. Let's another year and a half? I'd be willing to walk an extra year and a half Let's trade it in for some you dog and let's buy whatever land we want Brilliant I mean how much do musket balls go for these days? No at least two three cents What if we do this and go up to Missouri and buy? Sense? What if we do this and go up to Missouri? And buy a place there. Where your grandma lives?

And have the second best date after Oklahoma. Of course we all know Oklahoma on paper, because we've never been. Oklahoma on paper number one with a musket ball. And then number two, Missouri. And then number three... Oh, all those river boats. Who do we want to alienate? Number three... Probably, I mean, can. Who do we want to alienate? Number three?

Probably, I mean, can we just say all of the Louisiana birches? Is that become a state yet? Seen. Uh, Uncle Tobias? What is it, okay? I gave you a couple hours to cool off. Um... Are you still mad at me for losing that musket ball? Yes, Noah. I'm still mad at you for losing that musket ball.

I was supposed to- We were supposed to plot out all of Oklahoma. This podcast is sponsored by Squarespace. Hi, uh, Aaron, uh, JPC. I would like to formally invite the two of you to be my dates for the local square dance. Oh, wow. You printed up an invitation and everything. This looks very professional. And I'm wearing a little cowboy outfit.

And we like that. Oh, and I see that you made a website using Squarespace. Adels refi square Square dancing party very real.com. Tried to keep us succinct. Wow, so you use Squarespace, the all-in-one website platform for entrepreneurs to stand out and succeed online, whether you're just starting out

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Mm-hm. Dot com. Yes. Yep, and with Squarespace, I can also sell content. I can sell exclusive content on my site by adding a paywall to sell memberships, of course, or sell files to customers that they can download or PDFs, music, eBooks. On this site, I have little cowboy hats that say, cow-addle.

Cow-addle. Uh-huh. It also looks like you can upload video content, organize your video library, and showcase your content on beautiful video pages. You can even sell access to your video library by adding a paywall to your content. Look, I'm gonna play this video.

Oh, it's you teaching us how to square dance. All right, everyone, addle up and ride. You're high, it's pretty hard. Addle up and ride. Also, it looks like you can make checkout kind of seamless for your customers with simple but powerful payment tools. You can accept credit cards, PayPal, Apple Pay, and in eligible countries are for customers

the option to buy now and pay later with after pay and clear pay. Hmm. It looks like I'm crying in the video because not enough people know about Squarespace. Hmm. Yeah. It actually kind of looks like you got square dance in your eye. That's why you're crying. I don't know how you get square dance in your eye. Yeah. Yeah, it looks like of looks like you got Squaredance in your eye. That's why you're you're crying. I don't know how you get Squaredance in your eye.

Yeah, yeah, it looks like that's what it was. Well, here's what I'll say. If you get Squaredance in your eye, head to Squarespace.com for a free trial. And when you're ready to launch, go to www.squarespace.com slash Riddle to save 10 percent off your first purchase of a website or domain. Erin, do-si-do. OK, I will be there, Adel. I will be your date.

JBC, you coming? No. Great. I'm distributed to the settlers. And now, I'm over here doing my facts and figures and you come and bother me in my study. All my numbers, I just lost them. I have to do it all in my head.

Boy. Sit down on my knee. Sit down here on my knee. All right. Oh, God. Oh, you're a big one. Have you ever thought, Noah, about what you want to do, who you want to be? Well, I figured my life was completely laid out for me already, being Noah, Oklahoma and all. I'm from the great Oklahoma's. We're starting a state. I have a legacy to upheld. Noah, how to put this?

I'm starting a state, okay? I'm a commissioned officer of the United States government starting a state. You, you are my brother's kid who is living with me for the summer, okay? Unless he dies. You don't, there's no nepotism. In which case, I'm your son. What? No, first of all, you'd be like my young ward or something.

And honestly, I don't know how young. You're, what are you, like 20, 22, 23? Yeah, I'm an old man. You should be a man. You should be out there in the world making something of yourself, Noah. And you can't have the last name Oklahoma. I'm sorry, I'm sorry.

What, but that's my dad's last name. No, it isn't? Yeah, your dad's last name's Is it? Your dad's last name is Oklahoma. Our family is Peterson. What did he tell you? He said we're all from the Oklahoma legacy. And he said he got an awful blood cough and that I should go stay with you for the summer

and that I get to live a life of luxury. Eating musket balls to my heart's content. of a life of luxury. Eating musket balls. To my heart's content. Living off the riches of Oklahoma's. Ding dong. You know what, Noah? How would you like to go to war?

Someone said ding dong at our totally wood door with no electricity. Oh, it's probably ding dong. Go get the door, Noah. Hello? Good evening, sorry to bother you. It's me, Ding Dog, the local census taker. I need to take a census.

Yeah, well, you came to the right place. Two people live here, a father and son, Tobias Oklahoma and his son, Noah Oklahoma. Slow down, slow down. Okay, got it. Two people, Noah Oklahoma. Slow down, slow down, slow down, slow down. Okay, got it. Two people, Noah, Oklahoma. Uncle Tobias, should I tell the census ding dong guy that there's a couple raccoons that keep you company at night in your bed? I know you told them it's not serious, but they're over here every night uncle Tobias No Noah, why don't we not tell a census taker that I fuck a couple of raccoons? Why don't we not you heard you say it just now? I guess we gotta bring them up

All right, what's the meaning? Ding-dong there's two raccoons that also live here and they have Consensual sex with my uncle Tobias every evening. And then the three of them share cigarettes. Do you get out of here, you rap scowl? I've got no soup for you. On your way! Yes sir, yes sir! You're welcome, Uncle Tobias. No, not you're welcome.

Now everyone in town will know about the two raccoons. 1, 2, 3, 4, hate Riddle Riddle's Clue Crew. Listen to the rest of the episode now by starting your free 7-day trial at patreon.com slash hey riddle riddle.