History Hyenas with Chris Distefano and Yannis Pappas - 164 - Summer of 1977 was WILD!
Episode Date: August 19, 2020The summer of 1977 in NYC was wild!!! CUZ some guy David Berkowitz started killing people all over New York City. Landlords were burning their buildings down for insurance money. New York was a M...ESS. Will history repeat itself CUZ?!?Want more Hyena content? Check out www.patreon.com/bayridgeboys where things get really WILD!Follow us!: 🙆🏼♂️🐕🙆🏻♂️🙆🏼♂️Chris Distefano on Instagram, Twitter, website🙆🏻♂️Yannis Pappas on Instagram, Twitter, website🐕History Hyenas on Instagram, Twitter, website Subscribe to the poddy woddy on YouTube, iTunes, Spotify, and HH Clips
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Yeah, coming in from the Bee Gees.
Very good call.
Giannis.
Yeah, what's the guy's name?
What's the lead singer of the Bee Gees' name?
Eunuch number one.
Yeah, Eunuch, that's a very good call.
We're watching Staying Alive music video.
If you look at the guy in the middle of the white pants,
Giannis has a good call. He said there's no way This guy is
It's nuts
And it's true
There's no way a guy
Can sing that high
Supposedly we're all related
No way in hell
That they don't come
From some sort of
Ultra ambitious
Demonic dad
Like the Jackson 5
Except he just took
Their nuts out
Because he knew
That he needed
Some sort of advantage
To get those kids
Singing high
We're gonna talk today
About David Berkowitz The son of Sam're going to talk today about David Berkowitz, the son of Sam.
This episode's going to be wild.
David Berkowitz, he's not your friendly Jewish neighbor.
No, he's not.
He's not going to invite you into his kibbutz for cookies.
Yeah, he's not going to talk to you like this and tell you about,
I'm so happy you're here, baby.
Come here.
Listen, children, come here.
It's the Sabbath, and we have cookies and milk for you.
Yeah, we have it for you.
He's not going to do that.
What instead he's going to do is wait till you kiss your girlfriend
and then shoot you in the head.
What he's really going to do is he's going to wait until he sees a girl
who's probably named Maxine or Janine sitting in a car somewhere in Queens or Yonkers or Brooklyn
because this kid tried to wipe out all of fucking Fort Hamilton High School.
Because it's one of those things where David Berkowitz,
and we'll get to the story, the son of Sam as well,
the whole summer of 1977.
Because we're lucky we didn't lose Irene and Lynn.
Yeah, I know, because Irene, Irene, and Lynn,
I'll tell you that story later on in the show,
may have had an encounter with him, but Son of Sam.
It's a good thing Irene was into Puerto Rican guys back then,
because they don't own cars to make out in.
No, they don't own cars.
We got to cut that out.
That goes into kamikaze.
Just, I've given you your first edit.
I just wanted to make a joke.
But do you, yeah, and they said that his dog,
they said son of Sam, David Berkowitz,
would say that his dog would tell him to do these things.
Now, does your dog, Isla, tell you to send out some of the tweets you sent?
Yeah.
Because you're the son of Sam.
No, it wasn't.
You're the son of Sam. It, it wasn't. You're the son of Sam.
It wasn't his dog.
You're fat.
Because so am I.
I have tits.
My tits are back.
Because it's what it is.
I got Nikki Glaser on my shirt.
And it's not Nikki Glaser.
If you listen to this, I love you.
I'm happy that.
I hope that you're proud
of me wearing your shirt
because finally
you have some tits
way Jong Jan
cause you're
you're Chris
you're Chrissy Sisyphus
Sisyphus
no not
who's the guy
who pushed a rock
up the hill
isn't that Sisyphus
no Sisyphus
flew too close
to the sun
by the way
correction from last episode
yeah we have a correction.
Someone called us some fucking franks and beans for some wrong fact we had.
What I love about Nikki Glaser is I can make that joke about the tits,
and she'll just like it and enjoy it instead of fucking trying to sue me.
Yeah, exactly.
She'll just be like, yeah, it's funny.
It's a tits joke.
And then she'll cut the...
Because the truth is for Nikki Glaser, if you watch her roast,
if she ever did get mad at me, she would fucking destroy me on the roast,
and I'd have nothing to do.
I'd stick my dick between my legs and come.
Wild.
That's what it is.
So we got a few facts wrong in the last episode.
A couple guys gave us a problem because we got something wrong.
Big fucking whoop.
Big deal.
No big whoop.
This is the hyenas.
We should just change the name to Hyenas History.
Hyenas History.
So people don't get it twisted.
Yeah, we're not, yeah.
Like, if you want to actually learn about real history,
then yeah, you could go Google that.
We're doing history in our own way.
Some shit is right.
Some shit is wrong.
We spruce it up.
We spruce it up a little bit.
Who cares?
We want you to go find out for yourself what's going on.
Here's the deal.
What I learned is the son of Sam, David Berkowitz,
the infamous serial killer, was that you were
binky.
Because that sounded dry.
You'll never know.
That one sounded dry.
Yeah.
Well, because I've been eating, it's, yeah, I don't know.
I've been, my diet's been getting healthier, so the farts have been getting a little drier.
So what I learned is David-
And I also think my anal fissure's cleared up.
I think it might have more to do with that.
Yeah.
Your asshole's really becoming more of a gentleman.
I got skin tags on my ass.
Yeah, I mean, your asshole can be an unruly, feral, wilding child,
but as you age, it's becoming a little bit more of a gentleman.
Yeah, it's becoming a little...
Because your asshole is more like New York in the 70s,
and now it's starting to act more like New York in the early 2000s.
Yeah.
Your asshole's gentrified. Your asshole's gentrified.
My asshole's gentrified.
That fart was gentrified and it was polite.
It's polite.
Because usually they're violent and wet.
Yeah.
And that was just a little pick.
It was just a little, yeah.
I'm just, because it had a kale and cheese croissant.
All right, so what were you saying?
I'm sorry.
I learned that David Kimowitz.
No.
I mean Berkowitz.
Yeah.
I almost said David Kimowitz before, too. Rest in peace. David Berkowitz. Kimowitz would have thought I mean Berkowitz. Yeah. I almost said David Kimowitz before, too.
Rest in peace.
David Berkowitz.
Kimowitz would have thought that was funny, though.
That's a shout out to my old manager.
David Kimowitz is laughing in heaven right now.
David Kimowitz was the greatest guy, R&P David Kimowitz.
David Berkowitz was not actually born by the parents who raised him.
The kid was adopted, although he did find out that his actual real mother, his birth mother, was Jewish.
Right, was Jewish.
And what happened was, is she was Jewish, and she married a man named Tony Falco, a fucking Italian-American,
and the birth mother had an affair on Falco, and she had to give it to baby by Tony Falco,
and that baby was David Berkowitz.
So David Berkowitz's actual birth father is a guy named Tony Falco.
Yeah, no, but that's not his birth father.
That was the guy who raised him who actually ended up being his father
was another rich Jew who was having an affair with his mom who was a Jew.
So even though the kid was adopted by Jews,
he felt like, hey, I'm not a Jew because you adopted me.
He went and found his parents, and he was still a Jew.
So the moral of the story is the chosen people are chosen.
They're chosen.
Even if you're giving up, you're chosen.
You're chosen.
But wait, but it says his birth mother, Elizabeth Betty Broda,
grew up as part of an impoverished Jewish family and was a waitress.
She married Tony Falco, a fucking gandaloon.
Well, Tony Falco thought that David thought that he gave birth to the other kids that she gave to the other kids.
Wait, so Tony Falco thought that David Berkowitz was his son?
Tony Falco knocked up his mom, okay?
Okay.
So Tony Falco knocked up his mom and he had other kids.
But his mom was having an affair with this rich Jew who had kids who forced her to give up that kid because of shame on the family.
Got it.
So she was having an affair.
So it ended up being that David Berkowitz actually was a full-blown, fully charged New
York City Jew.
New York City Jew.
And it says Berkowitz was somewhat troubled.
You think?
He was a little bit troubled.
So let's just start by saying it is sort of a known fact that if you're adopted, you have a, there's a higher rate of criminality.
Right.
If you get adopted, you're rejected by the mother.
Yeah.
So it's just one of those things, I guess, where you're searching for who you are and you want to find out who your birth parents are.
You have an identity problem.
So he went and searched for his birth parents.
I got fucking Lulu's on right now.
And when I put on my Lulu's, I feel good.
I feel good in my Lulu lemons.
I don't like it when you get
this body confident i just don't like it what do you mean i'm not body confident right now i'm
sitting closed position i know but the problem is when you stand up your butt pops out and i don't
like that cuz what are you talking about i just want to see you in a jersey i want to forget how
fucking voluptuous that butt is yeah because i want to take a bite out of it take a bite out of
the peach ass cuz your ass you got your ass, you got saddle hips.
Yeah, I got saddle hips, yeah.
Because if you got on a horse, it looks like you're riding on a saddle.
I got childbearing hips, and it's what it is.
Yeah, I just got, I got a jiggly, meaty ass.
You got a really tight, tight jawline and a handsome face,
and just the body of a woman that won't quit.
David Berkowitz.
You got the body of a woman who just started Suzanne Somers'
home workout videos.
If I was one of his victims,
I'll tell you what,
if he shot me in the ass cheek,
I wouldn't even feel it.
You wouldn't feel a thing.
You'd be able to call the cops and identify this maniac.
Yeah, identify which.
Okay, so what happened?
So Berkowitz,
he had a fairly
somewhat troubled childhood.
He became infatuated
with petty larceny
and starting fires.
Sounds like Venetia.
And Berkowitz is difficult, spoiled, and a bully.
Sounds like Giannis.
So let's set the scene a little bit here.
Summer of 77, which was a wild summer in New York City.
Wow.
How old were you?
What were you in your 30s?
I was 37 years old in 1977.
I want to sit like this today.
Sit like that. Sit like this today. Sit like that.
Sit like Yanni.
Sit like a little fudgy.
A little fudgy.
No, but this is good.
This is adult stuff.
Yeah, it's adult stuff.
So summer of 77, New York was in bad shape.
The tax base had escaped.
The term white flight.
A lot of middle class white people were fleeing to the suburbs.
Crime was high.
There was a heroin epidemic.
The city was almost bankrupt.
Crime was high because of systemic racism. It's character piece. Systemic racism is the reason. Absolutely. That was a heroin epidemic. The city was almost bankrupt. Crime was high because of systemic racism.
Systemic racism is the reason
that crime was high. Absolutely, that's why it was.
Also, heroin was everywhere.
And also, we had a mayor
who totally revamped the
budget, froze a lot of salaries,
hacked a lot of jobs,
tried to redo it.
Mayor A. Beam, who was a squeak.
Wow, did he fucking
Yeah
Tanked the city
He fucking tanked it
So Abe Beam
Was the mayor in 77
Also we had a mayoral election
Coming up in 78
So the summer of 77
There was a campaigning
In the primaries
Uh
He lost to
Uh
Ed Koch and Cuomo
And then Koch
Ended up becoming
Mayor of New York
And He was a gay kid Gay kid Ed Koch Is Cuomo, and then Koch ended up becoming mayor of New York.
He was a gay kid.
Gay kid.
Ed Koch is a $3 bill.
Ed Koch, we have a good friend.
I guess I can't say his name, but maybe he could come on the podcast and talk about it. He's a good friend of the show, comedian friend, knew Ed Koch very well,
and allegedly Ed Koch used to take him up to his hotel room
and fucking finagle his balls a little bit before Ed Koch came out of the closet.
And he was also his plus one at a lot of dinners.
There's a lot of stories I know personally
about Ed Koch behind closed doors.
And make no mistake, yeah,
there was a lot of gay, gay, gay activity that was going on.
Yeah, and he admitted later in his life that he was gay, Ed Koch.
He was a good mayor, though, right?
There was always rumors because, first of all,
he talked like that kind of.
He was going, oh, stop. The Bronx is on fire.
We'll fix it.
Shut up.
He was screaming.
He was like a real catty gay guy.
He had funny things.
Didn't he say like in a press conference, too, to like report?
He has like a famous thing that he would tell reporters just, oh, shut up.
Something like that.
Yeah, he was just like, oh, shut up.
He was like a queen.
Yeah, turn it down.
Yeah.
I'm listening to Tina Turner records with my friends.
Yeah.
So Ed Koch, he's the mayor.
But he's not the mayor.
He's the mayor.
He's about to become mayor in 78.
Right.
So 77, he's running off.
He's running for mayor.
And Abe Beam is officially mayor.
Abe Beam's tenure as mayor did not go so good for New York City.
He fucking white flight. tenure as mayor did not go so good for New York City.
He fucking white flight.
He,
yeah,
the economy crashed.
David Berkowitz
was on the fucking loose.
The only thing that's good
about A-Beam
is the Yankees won the series
in 1977.
Also,
hip hop was born.
Oh yeah,
that's good.
Hip hop was born.
Yes,
hip hop was born.
Yes.
Absolutely.
Yes.
Disco got popular in New York and Studio 54 opened in 77.
Yeah.
I mean, this was a summer, Bubba.
This was a summer.
And yeah, just 13 years later, Giannis' father would come into mayor David Dinkins.
There you go.
He looks wild.
I mean.
Because you got a black dad.
You said you have a black godmother.
Your godmother's black.
Godmother's black.
You're a black kid.
My godmother is black. Godmother's black. You're a black kid. My godmother is black.
Yeah.
To quote Charles Dickens,
this was the best of times
and the worst of times
in New York City.
And V is saying,
V can't believe those old photos
in New York City.
She's going,
what happened?
How did this happen?
How did this happen?
How did that happen?
V is like,
we need to get merch
with old pictures in New York City.
Because the Bronx was on fucking fire
in the 70s. It still is. Because the Bronx was on fucking fire in the 70s.
It still is.
Because the Bronx
was fucking like...
Because of Vanity
and Haponea,
they've lit the fuse again.
You guys are lighting it up.
Everything was also on fire
because there was
an economic crisis
so a lot of landlords
were just lighting up
their fucking buildings
to get the insurance money
and then move to Long Island.
Move to Long Island
because if you don't think
I'm not going for fucking, I'm not going to
our Halloween party this year as Binky Mike, you got another thing coming.
Because when you had a couple of flare-ups that you talked about openly on this podcast
so I don't feel bad joking about it when you were in Disney.
You can joke about anything, yeah.
Did you ever think about nicknaming your piece the Bronx in 77?
The Bronx?
Yeah.
It's on fire.
It's on fire.
The 77.
The Bronx is burning.
Yeah, no, because I mean it feels nice to safely be able to sit in these West Elm chairs 77? It's on fire. It's on fire. The 77. The Bronx is burning.
Yeah, no, because, I mean, it feels nice to safely be able to sit in these West Elm chairs and tell you I don't have chlamydia.
Because I was, I think what you were saying before, you're like, I remind you of Sisyphus.
I remind you of syphilis.
The thing is because you had a drippy faucet, but you have called the plumber and he has addressed it.
Yeah, the plumber has come over and fixed my drip.
Because your family plumber is Lukasz.
Yeah, it's Lukasz who says the coronavirus isn't real.
Why?
Don't say that because they'll take us down from YouTube.
The coronavirus is real.
Oh, yeah, we forgot to not curse in the first five minutes.
It's just something we'll never be able to do.
This podcast is just built for limited ads.
There's nothing we can do.
There's nothing we can do.
If you want to watch a fully blown, fully added podcast,
go watch fucking Dan Carlin's History of the United States
or whatever the hell it's called, or go watch Two Dope People.
This is the limited ads podcast.
It's the limited ad ass podcast.
So summer of 77, all this is going on.
Everything's on fire.
The Bronx is on fire.
Buildings are on fire.
Crime is high.
Heroin.
Eileen and Lynn are talking about, don't go outside.
This is a crazy murder ride.
She's like, don't worry.
I'm going up to Uncle.
Allegedly in 1977, allegedly my mom and aunt were walking outside their house in Ridgewood Queens and they saw the
car that was being reported all over the news I think it was a small yellow Volkswagen or some
type of yellowish car they saw it parked on her block and ran back into the house and told my
grandfather and they called the police and the police told them to stay inside and don't leave
the house and then by the
time the cops got there the car was gone so nobody knows if it was for sure his car if my mother was
just having a panic attack you know i don't know what was happening or you know i have no idea but
that is a story i've been told for years about and they would always show me this is exactly where it
was parked so who knows let's just be at if there was a God, which I'm not sure of,
if there was a God, he would have set it up where he would have given New York City
a little bit of a better chance by having, God forbid, David Berkowitz target your mom.
Right.
Because what would have happened is something different.
He would have turned around.
She would have looked at him.
He would have froze because the eyes of Jesus would have froze him.
The goodness that came through those eyes would have froze him.
He would have dropped the gun.
She would have invited him up for coffee and Sanka.
With some cake and Sanka.
She would have talked him off the ledge.
He would have met Larry.
The dog would have been barking.
He would have got over his fear of barks because he hated bark.
That's why he called himself the Summer Sam. He ended up shooting that neighbor's dog. But he would have got over his fear of barks because he hated bark that's why I called himself the summer Sam he ended up shooting that neighbor's dog right but
he would have met Larry who barks incessantly yeah but in the presence of the good spirit of your mom
he would have learned that that dog is a good thing he would have been conditioned to like dog
barks and nothing would have happened those people would still be alive I'll tell you what I don't
even do you one better nothing would have happened and I guarantee you because he was she was a she
wouldn't be able to change him in the eyes of the Lord,
and she always did tell me that she found Jewish men attractive.
David Berkowitz could have been my father.
And Barney Rubble would have never made the cut
because this kid was a handsome young man.
Because there's no way she wouldn't have been spared
because he definitely would have been invited up
for a piece of cake and some Sanka.
He would have been given Sanka and coffee cake right away.
And yeah, that mount, somebody stole the TV mount from the apartment.
Hold up one second.
Let's look at Berkowitz.
Let's look at Chrissy.
Is there a chance that that's his real father?
It could be.
I mean, let's take a peek because you did say you had a Jew in your family.
I do.
It could be Dave Berkowitz.
Has your mom been kind of trying to skirt around the fact that
that's your real dad because do i look like a young son of sam or what a little bit because
i mean you got the jawline i mean you got the smile and the death behind the eyes is the same
yeah he's a squeak too is berkowitz a squeak he's not that much of a squeak i don't believe
he's not that much of a squeak i mean that kid's in he's been in prison since he's 25 years old
he's still alive we could go visit david berk in prison since he's 25 years old. He's still alive.
We could go visit David Berkowitz right now if we wanted to.
David Berkowitz is still alive.
He's converted to Christianity.
There's also a son of Sam law on the books in New York City because he started making money through some Christian networks
by proselytizing or whatever.
So they said, no, you can't make money for yourself if you're in prison.
So, you know, that can't be done.
All right.
So what's the story?
Let's get to the note.
So everything's on fire.
And then also we forgot one main component of 77.
What happened?
Heat wave, major heat wave.
And then the spark gets lit with a little fucking blackout,
rolling blackouts throughout the city.
People lose power.
And at first, people in Vanitya's building, where she lives,
were going like, so cool.
Fuck it.
Let's have like a 1776-themed dinner.
And they had their servants just kind of walk in with plates
and say like, oh my God, this is so cool.
It's a candlelit dinner just like Thomas Jefferson used to do, whatever.
And downstairs, the city was in fucking fuego, baby.
So, okay, so but what, okay, so let's get to the actual
David Berkowitz crimes.
Can we go to the notes?
I want to get to, okay, so here we go.
So he was arrested on August 10th, 1977,
11 days after his last murder.
And let's go down to what happened.
So what's the first thing?
There we go.
The first thing he did was he attacked a 14-year-old girl with a knife,
and she fought back and lived.
He was so horrible.
Was she Puerto Rican?
I don't know if she was Puerto Rican.
I don't know.
Why?
I just don't know because she fought back and lived.
It just sounds like
Right
She's going like
Uh uh
Fuck that shit
Yeah
No no no
Drop that fucking knife
And let's go
Yeah
Let's do this shit
I'll take my earrings off
And we do this
Fucking
Mr. Killer man
Mr. Killer man
You trying to kill me
Let me take these shits off
And square up
Shit
Let me put my Reeboks on
And take off my heels
Okay
Donna Lauria
And Jody Valenti
Sat in their car
when David walked out and fired five shots through the windshield
on July 29, 1976.
Donna died quickly, unfortunately.
Jody was wounded in the thigh.
So Jody made it out.
So, wow, we should have got Jody on the podcast.
Yeah.
In fact, we have some fan who did message us, and I forgot.
Maybe we'll do a Patreon episode with her where she said
her mother or aunt was attacked by the son of Sam and lived, I believe.
So one of these women who lived was our fan's aunt relative.
They thought that Laura Valenti shooting was possibly related to mob activity since Laura's father was active in the Teamsters Union.
So nobody thought there was a serial killer on loose on July 20, 1976.
Then let's go down to October 23, 1976.
In a residential neighborhood in Queens,
he fired at a young couple through the rear windshield
and shot the man in the head, but he survived the attack.
Cuz, how do you survive a shot to the head?
Cuz, if someone's going to survive a shot to the head,
it's not going to be me.
It's going to be you.
You got a Roman helmet head.
You got a Roman head.
Cuz, it's so, yeah. Cuz, I mean, you know, one roman helmet head got a roman head because it's so yeah
because i mean you know one of the victims got shot in the thigh just like yanni yeah and the
other one survived the headshot just like chrissy yeah so it's just what it is then november 27th
1976 david walked up to two women sitting on a porch at bellrose queen's binky's hometown
and he asked for directions and he pulled out his 44 caliber gun and fired a bolt woman paralyzing
one of them.
Yeah.
So this guy's on a fucking rampage.
He goes on a rampage.
So he starts with this 14-year-old girl,
kills her with a knife.
He ends up later telling psychiatrists
and whatever that he hated it
because it was so difficult,
so personal.
It freaked him out.
There was a lot of blood.
He got cut.
So he vows to use a gun next time.
So he gets a gun from his friend
who he's in the military with.
He was actually in Korea.
With his dad?
He might have been with my dad,
although my dad was with the Greek battalion,
so I don't think so.
Right.
So he meets up his war buddy in the Midwest,
and his buddy buys him a.44, the famous,
it's a rare gun, it's like a, what is it, a Colt.44,
which ends up being the gun that they're looking for.
Yeah,.44 caliber, like Colt or something.
So he drives, he goes and visits his friend in the Midwest,
and he drives back with that gun.
He tells his friend he needs a gun for self-protection,
and that gun becomes the gun that they start hunting for.
Yeah.
And it's what it is.
He wrote a letter to the police.
Can you just go up a little bit?
It says, I say goodbye and goodnight, police.
Let me haunt you with these words.
I'll be back.
I'll be back to be interrupted. Bang, bang, bang, bang, ugh. Yours in murder, Mr. Let me haunt you with these words. I'll be back. I'll be back to be interrupted.
Bang, bang, bang, bang.
Ugh.
Yours in murder, Mr. Monster.
Now, when I read that, I said, is that Zach's new rap song?
Yeah.
I don't know if those are Zach Eisner's new lyrics.
Yeah.
But Venetia said, no, that's the son of Sam's letter to the cops.
Yeah.
Yeah.
So, you know, Mr. Monster, he signed it Mr. Monster.
Mr. Monster.
January 30th, 1977, young couple saying good night to each other had their
windshield shattered with gunfire christine freud died a few hours later of her injuries
march 8th 1977 this one sucks virginia avosa rishian was approaching her mother's house when
david met her on the sidewalk and shot her directly in the face killing her instantly i mean what a
fucking piece of shit why don't the but like why don't my question still is like why like what's the point
of keeping like he's a madman nut job like that he killed why do we keep him alive in prison i just
don't get it like why does he get to be in prison because this is a liberal state that doesn't uh
believe in the death penalty because yeah but i mean there should just be something if you do
things like this maybe you don't kill him but you should have to fight like um you should have to
like fight your way out of a lion's pit or fight out of a bear cave.
You should do something like that where we're not killing you, but we're giving you back
to the earth and to nature.
And like, if you could fight against the animals and live in the jungle, I don't know, something.
You can't just be given fucking, you can't shoot a woman in the face, visit her mother.
And then, you know, two months later, be served coffee and cheese sandwiches.
No, that just can't happen. No, I i agree with you we should maybe give him the coronavirus something well i think that why does david burke was not have the coronavirus right now a hundred percent
at least the vaccine just give them the vaccine and then you fucking what do they i don't understand
it it's like if you're doing crimes like this that have been you know you've been convicted and it's
like we have proof you did that i mean you gotta got it I mean, it's got to be something maybe we throw in the ocean and if you can get to you know
It's a hundred mile radius and if you could get his islands you could go anyway
And if you make it you make it, you know, we'll put an ankle bracelet on you
So we know where you are
But I don't know if you could sit down and have a conversation with me after I've had four cups of coffee
And I've had a good night's sleep. Yeah, then we let you live
But if you do if I give you a long day's sleep, then we let you live.
But if you do, if I give you a long day and you live, you deserve to live.
But we give you a gun, we give you a gun, and you can't use that gun against me because I'm behind plexiglass.
Right.
So people will end up taking their own lives.
It's what it is.
So the state wouldn't even have to kill people.
I would just give them a long fucking day and then the taxpayers wouldn't have to worry
about them no more.
It's just what it is.
So, okay, so two days after the shooting,
the NYPD and Mayor Abe Beam, the squeak,
held a press conference and declared that
a serial killer was on the loose. They had a
task force of nearly 300 officers tasked
with tracking down and bringing the shooter to justice.
People...
Yeah, go ahead. This is the funny thing
about 77 versus now.
It's like, if you committed a crime back then,
unless somebody saw it,
there was a good chance you were getting away with it
because this was like before advanced forensics.
Right.
You know, they didn't have anything.
In fact, this is true.
The police who were in charge of trying to find Son of Sam
started seeing some parallels with Starsky and Hutch episodes.
Really?
So they just started watching Starsky and Hutch episodes. Really? So they just started watching Starsky and Hutch episodes.
That's hilarious.
To try to figure out if they could try to get some leads.
That's a true story.
So, like, I don't know why half the population wasn't criminals back in the day.
It just lets you know that humanity is kind of good.
We're not that bad.
No, I think people start out good for sure.
Most people are good.
The NYPD believed that killer was targeting women with long, dark hair,
so women started cutting their hair.
So that's the invention of the bulls**t game in 1977.
The haircut.
You look at that Starsky and Hutchup thing because it's really funny.
Because they would cut their hair off and they dyed it blonde
or they began wearing light-colored wigs.
Yeah, it would be fun to be a woman in 1977 or even just me. I know me. If I was a kid in 1977, I would throw on a light-colored wigs. Yeah, it would be fun to be a woman in 1977, or even just me.
I know me.
If I was a kid in 1977,
I would throw on a light-colored wig
and just say, listen,
so the son of Sam doesn't hunt me.
But really, it's because I feel fierce.
I'd be totally safe
because I would just get in the car
and throw the Marisa wig on.
That's it, dude.
That's it.
It's a short red wig.
I'd be fine.
Then April 17th, 1977,
he shot and killed Alexander Ipaw and Valentina
Sewani as they sat in their car.
And a note was
found at the scene addressed to NYPD Captain
Borelli. He said, I love
to hunt prowling the streets for fair game, tasty
meat. The women of Queens are
prettiest of all. Wow. Good point
though. Queens got some pretty ladies.
Well, it's a very culturally diverse place. You got
all types of, girls over there.
Pretty Polish women
in Ridgewood, no?
Polish women in Ridgewood.
I think the hottest
girls are in, I like
the Brooklyn, I like
this part of Brooklyn.
I think the women
are hot out here.
Yeah, they're hot
out here.
In Bay Ridge.
The only problem
with the women out
here in Bay Ridge
is though, if you
talk to them, you
gotta first ask them
about their family
just so you can know
who their brothers are. You almost want to meet their brothers before you meet them first ask them about their family just so you can know who their brothers are.
You almost want to meet their brothers before you meet them.
Their brothers are their fathers.
You want to know exactly what's going on or if they have any crazy ex-boyfriends because you just don't want to fucking deal with it.
You just don't want to deal with that.
Some of these guys will hurt you out here.
I mean, these guys are on a rampage in 1977.
June 26th, shoots out the windshield of another car.
Then July 31st, 1977, he tried to,
because everyone thought
he was just killing people in Queens,
so Queens was the hotspot,
but then he fucking came to BK.
He drove in the BQE
and just came to BK,
and he fired four shots
to the windshield of a car
striking a young couple.
He killed a woman
named Stacey Moskowitz.
She died a few hours later.
I mean, 1977,
I mean, what would you do?
That was the time.
That would be the time if you were a woman living in 1977 to go trans.
Yeah.
That would be the time.
Yes.
He wasn't killing guys, I don't think, right?
This was a good time to be a POC because he wasn't killing POCs.
He was killing white women and whatever guys they were with.
You know what?
Actually, Son of Sam, in a way, is a hero because he was taking out white privilege before.
I didn't want to say it.
Yeah.
I didn't want to say it.
Yeah.
Because I just wanted
to make sure
we haven't run it
by the AOC POC board.
Yeah.
But you said it.
And I think that that's an over,
now that we can go back
in history
and we can say,
can we revisit
whether he was doing good?
Yeah.
I mean, he was getting rid of some white people.
White.
We may have to cut this out or no?
But we'll cut it out.
It might make the kamikaze for the 25th.
White Joan Jen.
We might cut it out.
Who knows?
We're just kidding.
It was obviously horrible.
We're just obviously kidding around.
It's all horrible and, you know, obviously, you know, horrible to any of the families
that were victims.
But, you know, I mean, what can you do? What can you do? I mean, you know. It's all horrible and, you know, obviously, you know, horrible to any of the families that were victims. But, you know, I mean, what can you do?
What can you do?
I mean, it's horrible.
You know, now, I mean, this guy's in fucking allegedly a Christian now.
And, you know, I don't know.
I just think he should have.
I think he should have been thrown.
I think he should have been smothered in peanut butter and different types of scents from different types of animals and thrown into a bear cave.
That's what I think should have happened.
And this way we're not killing the bears or eating him. And it's good for the ecosystem. And it gets just scumb cave. That's what I think should have happened. And this way, we're not killing him. The bears are eating him.
And it's good for the ecosystem.
And it gets just scumbag.
He's not even a scumbag.
He's just clinically insane where there's no helping.
So guys like, people like that just have to go
if they're going to be that much of a danger.
Yeah.
Yeah.
But, you know, listen, it's a privatized prison system.
So this guy, you know, David Berkowitz probably has made
some of the toothpaste that you bought
at fucking CBS.
What I really love about our new sponsor Hawthorne is they got a bunch of products that make
you feel like a man.
Yeah, it's Hawthorne with an E dot co.
And they made us take a little quiz and make no mistake because they want to know what
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They want to know what products you like on your skin.
It's a skin product company.
It's all about the skin, skin you have. They want to know what products you like on your skin. It's a skin product company. It's all about the skin, skin, skin.
What I love about them is they make it easy because when you're a guy, you just want an
all-in-one.
Just give me a freaking quiz.
Let me answer it, and then you tell me what I need.
Send it to me all-in-one.
They give you a cologne that's for play, for work, lotion, skin products, soaps.
Make me smell like a man.
It's what it is because when I took that quiz,
when I said, oh, Hawthorne's going to send me a quiz,
make no mistake, I dressed up like Britney Spears
from Hit Me Baby One More Time,
and I sat down and took that quiz,
and I was smelling fresh because for the first time all summer,
I have absolutely no fumade because I put Hawthorne on my skin
and on my taint.
That's what it is.
They sent us a beautiful package. You guys can get it too. We love this product. It's what it is. They sent us a beautiful package.
You guys can get it too.
We love this product.
It's all in one.
You don't got to think.
Take the quiz.
They send you the package.
Lotions, soaps, colognes.
I love the one cologne for work, one for play.
If you want to get crazy,
you can switch it up and use the one for play
as the one for work and vice versa.
Here we go.
And it's Hawthorne.co.
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Use our promo code WILD
to get a discount 10% off your first purchase.
And I know that this product is good.
And I know that it's well thought out and thorough.
And it smells so good on your skin.
And I know that the company is most likely ran by women.
Because make no mistake, we did this ad already.
And then they made us redo it
because we forgot one word.
And they're very, very, very, they pay attention, close attention and detail,
much like our producer, Venetia, does, and we're doing well.
So Hawthorne's doing well, and that's what it is.
Go women.
Trust the matriarchy.
Yes.
This is such a good company with such good male products that it's going to get put on notice
for supporting the patriarchy go to hawthorne with an e.co no m.co because the last
m is for matriarchy right so that's why they need them to make toothpaste and toothbrushes the only
problem with that is like that's the thing that people get scared of is it starts with that which
you're going like it's not a it's not an unreasonable thing you're saying you're saying hey the guy can't
be helped whatever he's a dangerous society let's get rid of him but the problem is people start thinking the state starts going like
okay so we got rid of him and then slowly your your voice just starts it starts the accent just
starts happening saying okay so we get rid of those ones now we also have those of that so
what do we do is that and they're going wait wait wait no we were just keeping no no no i have a
question here he's on the street just standing there where he should be working.
So what do we do?
And then it just keeps going.
That's why people get nervous about letting the state kill people.
Yeah, yeah.
Which you're very comfortable with, no?
That's funny.
That's funny that any time you get a fucking judge, it gives a death row.
It gives somebody life or it gives death chair.
They have a gym and access.
The electric chair. They say, gym and oxygen. The electric chair.
They say, it's time for you to die.
Do you think it would be fun just for one day as a prank?
Should we contact one of the networks and tell them to make a TV show no one's going to watch
where we just tell for one day every train conductor is German?
Yeah.
How great would that be?
Everyone gets in the train, and you just hear,
Hello, welcome to the Amtrak.
My name's Wilhelm.
We'll be going to Warsaw, I mean Washington DC.
Way John John.
Everybody have your passports out and ready.
It's character pitch.
And then the train just stops in the middle.
Sorry, we found out we have some people on the train
that the authorities want to speak to.
Sit still, be over soon.
Wait, John John.
Thank you for driving arm truck.
Yeah, we're the history hyenas
because we don't do accurate history.
It doesn't matter.
No.
Okay, here we go.
So here's what's fucking interesting.
I mean, it's funny how like in every million years
you think the kid would get caught this way august 10th 1977 what happened was is at the scene of
that moskowitz volante shootings a witness saw a man getting away in a car that had a parking
ticket on it and on that day only a handful of parking tickets were given out and one of them
was from berkowitz so the kid got i mean were not, I mean, the city was on fire,
but the meter maids were not, you know, they were not giving out parking tickets.
I mean, the kid got caught basically for a parking ticket, which is hilarious,
that like every cop in the city, there was a manhunt for this guy.
They had a description.
They had a witness.
They knew what kind of car he drove. They knew he was
white. They knew everything
and they couldn't catch him until he got
a parking ticket. They had a 300
person task force and then he got taken down
by Sandra Dee giving a parking ticket.
It's what it is.
Because he ended up
Being a fully charged Jew
Is kind of a victory
For the Sandras a little bit
It's a victory for the Sandras
You see this is payback now
For what you did to our people
Yeah
So now we got you
Take you down
Because your meter ran out
So on August 10th 1977
Police officers approach
Berkowitz's Park Ford Galaxy
Sounds like a piece of shit
Vanity has
Outside his apartment In Yonkers.
And they found in the back, they just found a little, just a few items.
They found a rifle, ammunition, maps of his crime scenes.
They also found a letter, a threatening letter addressed to the task force commander,
Timothy Dowd.
Investigators certain they had it, so they set up a perimeter surveillance to watch him.
And at 10 p.m., Berkowitz walked out of his apartment carrying a.44 caliber rifle in a paper bag and was arrested without a shot being fired.
So they said this kid lived.
He was 24 years old.
He was a postal worker who lived alone.
You know, he was filthy apartment.
They said liquor bottles everywhere, walls, scratched graffiti.
And when he came out, he said to the police, well, you've got me.
Yeah, he said he was a little relieved, like they all say. This is where the expression going postal
comes from. He was a postal worker. Wow, that's true. So he got that.
Summer of Sam. Spike Lee did a movie Summer of Sam because 77
was wild. Then on the area on the wall, he had wrote
in this hole lives the wicked king. So he knew he was tormented. He was tormented
for a long time.
Even when he was a child,
would tell his parents,
you can't fix me.
There's something wicked about me.
I'm wrong.
I'm a piece of...
He felt like he was a piece of garbage.
He hated himself.
Well, he was.
And he spoke about it a lot.
See, Venetia even feels bad for the criminals.
You can't tell Venetia.
Typical progressive shit.
The Venetia, I know it's not his fault.
That's my problem.
No, but it is his fault. I know it's not. No, That's my problem. No, but it is his fault.
I know it's not.
No, no, but I'm saying he was saying it was all in his head,
and I understand that.
Thank God we don't have those things going on in our head.
But my point is that it doesn't matter.
I'm sorry you got a bad draw, guy, but you can't stay here.
You got to go.
Like little Duvall says, okay, if you can't change a situation,
you have to change your perspective.
That's what little Duval says.
And Andrew Schultz has taken that with him everywhere he's gone since then.
Yeah.
And it's actually a really good piece of advice.
If you can't change your situation, you have to change your perspective.
Absolutely.
And if you read the book, which I feel like is the best book ever written,
called East of Eden by John Steinbeck,
which I think is sort of like the Bible for normal people.
There's an old...
I got through 30 pages of that, and I couldn't do it no more.
So there's an expression in that called timshel.
That comes from the old Yiddish, the Hebrew timshel,
which is thou mayest.
It means you have a choice.
You're thou gayest.
So at the end of the day, what makes us human,
makes us human is not our opposable thumbs,
not our bigger than average brains compared to the other animals,
not our peenies or our manicures and pedicures.
It's that we have a choice.
We can choose.
You can choose whether to be good or bad boy.
And David Berkowitz, he chose to be a bad, bad boy.
Okay? Venetia, I know
when you go out and you protest and you topple statues,
you say, listen, this is just my Greek
passion. We're fighting against the junta.
We're communist heroes.
Comrade, comrade, comrade. We're for the people
to each his own according to his need.
Utopia, what's bad? Down with the capitalism.
Down, down, down. But
you had a choice.
You had a choice.
Yeah.
You could have been a good girl.
And instead you chose AOC. That was raised by a good Greek Republican father.
Yeah.
But you went the other way.
Yeah.
Way, John Jan.
Went the other way.
We're kidding.
We're having fun.
So, okay.
So, but interesting, when the night he was stopped,
when he was leaving with that.44 caliber rifle,
he had told police he'd been planning a raid on a Hampton disco that night,
and authorities would have been counting bodies all summer,
and the police found in his car a submachine gun
and a note to authorities on the seat of the car.
So not all cops are bad.
Why?
But you know what?
Part of me,
part of me,
I don't want to get conspiracy cuties
because I like to save that for the Patreon.
Save that for the Patreon conspiracy cuties.
Patreon.com slash Bay Ridge Boys.
Yes,
Patreon.com slash Bay Ridge Boys.
To see our series of conspiracy cuties.
But do you think it's out of the realm of possibility?
Yeah,
he's back.
There you go.
Chrissy from the 70s asshole is back. Yeah, he's back. There you go. Chrissy from the 70s
asshole is back.
Yeah, I like it.
It kind of gives it
a little more flair
when it comes off the lulus,
when it ricochets.
It really has some...
Sorry, Vanity.
I'm sorry.
I'm sorry.
You're just such a part
of my parea and my family
that I realize
I shouldn't be doing that.
I'm sorry.
Yeah, it's okay.
But you couldn't sue us
for farting.
No matter what happens, we'll never get in trouble for farting. Yeah, it's okay. But you couldn't sue us for farting. No matter what happens,
we'll never get in trouble for farting.
Yeah.
It's going to be funny
because we all keep figuring
we're going to get sued by Venetia,
but then out of nowhere,
we're going to get sued by Binky Mike.
Binky Mike's just going to be like,
yeah, the kid, they wouldn't stop farting.
I'm sensitive to farts.
It was disrespectful.
Yeah.
So, fuck, what was I about to say?
Where were we? I got distracted by the fart. It was funny. I don't remember.
I just don't remember. Oh, yeah. I was saying, I don't want to get it. Tim Schill. I don't want to get it.
No. Tim Schill's done. Tim Schill Dillon. That means you have a choice. You can always choose. That's what makes
you human. No matter how hard it is, you can choose. Okay, but what I was saying is, I don't want to get conspiracy cutie on this,
but do you think it's outside of the realm of possibility
that the cops, because it took them so fucking long to get this guy, they kind of planted that in the car and said, oh, wow, he's about to go on this crime spree.
Thank God we caught him to kind of make themselves look heroes in a PR type of way.
Very possible.
Very, very possible.
The whole murder thing landed 13 months, spanned 13 months.
That's a long time.
Which is just one month over a year.
You're good at mathematics.
Yeah, go down a little bit.
So let's get into why he did it.
Let's get into the psychosis of his serial killer.
Talk about why he was doing it, why mentally he felt like he had to do it.
And I have a hunch it's from systemic oppression and white privilege.
But we'll see what his psychologist said.
And the most important part is why he did it,
not that he did it.
That he did it is bad.
That's a part of the system.
It's the system's fault
because we live in a bad system.
But as you know,
Sergeant Snuggles and Lieutenant Lollipop
would go there,
and as are the social workers that we are,
we would find out why he did it.
That's the most important part.
Why he did it.
It could have been prevented.
It could have been prevented.
So David Berkowitz,
they say, psychologists say, he's a classic ego-directed serial killer,
mostly driven by a deficient sexual self.
So does that mean he has a little piece?
What's a deficient sexual self?
It means he has a low vision of himself sexually or something?
Like he thinks he's not good in bed and he just thinks he's not wanted sexually.
Can we look that up?
Because I'm no psychologist.
Aren't you the doctor?
Well, I mean, it's just, you know,
it's deficient sex.
Yeah, I mean, that's probably what it means.
Kid just has a little piece and whatever.
No, can you go back to the notes?
Oh, sorry.
I'm sorry.
Okay.
Oh, yeah, yeah.
I'm sorry.
His social development came together
to inhibit his social development
at a young age.
Many factors.
He was adopted.
He was an only child
and he had a difficult temperament,
and he didn't like his appearance and self-image.
But he did say when he reached his emotional breaking point,
he decided to kill what he couldn't have, meaning young women,
especially one enjoying the very thing that eluded him,
an intimate moment with another person.
So that is a deficient sexual self.
So the kid probably had a little piece, couldn't really get any,
and he just didn't like that so he would see other girls uh you know making other guys making out with
the girl that he wanted so then they just had to die for that so he's a little what we call that
in the hood is just your little bitch it's what it is you absolutely have mental issues and of
course yes yes yes but you're just a little bitch that you're just an immature man
that's a little bitch, bitch, bitch.
And I just hope that, you know,
for someone like the people like that
that do that, I know that mentally,
but it's either you go to prison
and I hope he was, I don't know,
I hope he was disciplined
by the inmates at that facility
for being a little bitch towards women
and killing them, innocent people.
But if he wasn't,
then maybe we can throw him into a bear cave.
I mean, tell me if you guys like,
go to patreon.com slash Barry Roach.
Tell me if you like Chrissy's solutions.
Vote for Chrissy.
And tell me if you think you like putting people
who kill pedophiles and people who kill like this,
like David Berkowitz,
to put them in a bear cave and rub them with peanut butter.
I actually think you make a great point, though.
I just want to take a second to acknowledge it.
You call him a little bitch.
He is the definition of that kind of insecure guy who you loathe.
You hate insecure guys.
Oh, I hate that guy with a passion.
Now, what's missing here to me is sort of that masculine kind of love
that kind of instills reality in you.
Right.
Which is going like, you're acting like a little bitch.
Go talk to that girl or style,
you know,
because that's where masculinity is very important.
I think.
Right.
In,
in the human condition.
Yes.
Because that's the truth.
What you just said is the truth.
He's just a little bitch.
He's a little bitch.
You're acting like a little fucking bitch.
Yeah.
Because you didn't get any fucking,
no,
no,
no.
You're going to,
you got to start killing people,
you little fucking.
Yes.
It's just,
it's what it,
there's a lot of truth to that.
And people who end up doing this type of thing
are little bitches.
They're little bitches,
cuz.
They always have some sort of like,
low sexual self-esteem.
Yeah,
and it's always everybody else's fault.
You got to die.
No,
dickhead.
Okay,
you're living in a fucking apartment that's filthy.
You're working for the post office.
You're drinking.
You're just a fucking, nobody wants you.
Like, what do you want?
Including your own mother.
Yeah, including your own mother didn't want you.
Yeah, including your own mother.
So I don't fucking know.
You got to kill people for that?
Just get out of here.
So he ended up going and meeting his mother at some point
because he was seeking out his birth parents,
and he hated her.
He thought it was going to be this huge relief for him to meet her,
and they were going to throw each other in each other's arms,
but he ended up hating how much of sort of,
he said she was like a nervous little woman.
He even used to do horrible, mean impressions of her after he met her,
but he did develop a relationship with one of his more caring half-sisters,
who was the son of Falco, so the mother they had in common,
and she was very nice to him and whatever,
but it wasn't enough.
Didn't matter.
Didn't do enough.
Listen, he said he simply wanted to pay back his,
because Berkowitz first said,
it was all over the news,
that he committed the killings
because he's demonically possessed.
His dogs told him to do it.
Not his dogs, his neighbor's dog.
His neighbor's dog, his neighbor's Sam Carr.
But in communism, there are no properties, so it's his dog. Right, it's his dog his dogs, his neighbor's dog. His neighbor's dog, his neighbor's Sam Carr. But in communism,
there are no properties,
so it's his dog.
Right, it's his dog.
So everyone's dog.
He created the story
that Sam was telling him
to kill using the dogs
as a medium.
Years later,
he would recant that,
those claims publicly
by saying that he needed
to justify the shootings
on his own mind
because it would cause him
to fabricate the story.
But make no mistake,
Sam Carr's dog
did get shot dead
by that.44 caliber gun
by David Berkowitz.
So the first victim was the dog. Yeah, no, he Sam Carr's dog did get shot dead by that.44 caliber gun by David Berkowitz. So the first victim was the dog.
Yeah, no, he did shoot the dog.
He did shoot the dog.
Here's the thing about these people.
They are liars.
He's most probably a psychopath.
Sure.
And the thing about them is they give you these reasons and they get all the, they prey on people who have empathy.
So if you have empathy, your blind spot is always
let me help,
let me help,
let me help.
So he says,
I did it for this reason.
And you go,
see,
it was for this reason.
He was adopted
and he was a Jew
and this,
this,
this.
But the real reason is
he's just a psychopath.
Yeah,
he's manipulating you.
He's manipulating.
He doesn't care.
He just is there
to get a relief.
He even said
the first time he killed, it was the relief.
He said it wasn't a sexual relief, but it was akin to a sexual relief.
Well, we've talked about this.
A lot of psychopaths, when they kill people, they have raging hard-ons.
Yes.
They got full boners.
Yes.
It's almost like when-
They got a Woodrow Wilson.
I didn't know what to do with this information, but I got to be honest.
You know, a comedian friend of mine once told me that when he would steal, his dick would get hard.
And I remember he told me that.
I laughed.
Yeah, now he's moving out of the country.
Yeah.
Way, John Jacks.
It's what it is.
Yeah.
So in 1987, of course, he converts to Christianity, which is wild because normally they go Islam in jail.
But he went Christianity.
He went the other way.
Who gives a shit?
Yeah, he went the other way.
Normally they go Islam, but he did go Christianity.
Nobody goes Jewish in prison. You ever notice that? Nobody. It's only tethered. Who gives a shit? Yeah, he went the other way. Normally they go Islam, but he did go Christianity. Nobody goes Jewish in prison.
You ever notice that?
Nobody.
It's only Christianity or Islam.
Nobody ever goes Jewish.
Those are only choices.
Yeah, because you know what it is?
There's never any, like Jews just don't do crime.
Yeah.
When they do crime, it's always like financial crime.
Like they always go into a nerdy part of the prison where they play chess and shit.
It'd be funny to just see someone go in prison and then go full Hasidic Jew when they come out.
Full Hasidic Jew.
chest and shit. It'd be funny to just see someone go in prison and go full Hasidic Jew
when they come out.
My theory really is that Jews always
get a hard time from people because they're the only
religion that does not
try to recruit you. They don't want you.
You always hate, you know like, the person
who rejects you is the one you hate the most.
So people always obsess over the Jews
because they're going like, why don't you want us?
And the Jews are going, because you're not chosen.
It's like, how do you get chosen?
And they're like, you have to eventually have sex with your cousin.
Because that's what it is.
If you keep everyone out, eventually you're having sex with a family member.
So in 1987, after reading a Bible given to him by an inmate or my mother,
he decides to convert to Christianity.
And then in 1998, with a collaborative effort with the evangelical pastors,
fucking full nut jobs.
He helped produce two Christian videos, Son of Sam, Son of Hope, and The Choice is Yours with David Berkowitz, which sounds like a campaign slogan.
And then New York passed a Son of Sam statute that prohibits criminals from profiting financially from their crimes, which has been challenged in the courts in recent years.
You know what's funny about us, Gus. You know what's funny about us, Gus?
You know what's funny about us?
What if we just decided we wanted to become a true crime podcast right now?
Yeah, that's just what we are.
What's the next one?
We just do that.
Jody, what's her name?
Jody Arias?
Jody Arias, yeah.
What if we just did five episodes in a row of true crime?
True crime, yeah.
And people are going, what is this show?
The algorithm, which is an AI cold, heartless bot, will just go like, I don't know what you guys are.
Yeah.
And then just fucking throw us off YouTube and be like, why'd you get thrown off YouTube?
Because those kids are too all over the place.
They're all over the place.
They're out of their mind.
Let's just become a true crime broadcast.
Guys, I want to do it.
This kid's at Sullivan Correctional Center in upstate New York right now.
I mean, we could be there in 45 minutes.
Because you want to go visit him?
Because I'll fucking kiss
Son of Sam on his ass cheeks.
Lieutenant Lally Pumper
and Sergeant Snuggles
want to pay
the Son of Sam a visit.
Do you think we could
ever convince your mom
to go there
and bring a little senka
and see if she could
talk some sense into him?
Yeah, or see if she could
bring Larry
and he'll stop talking to Larry?
Because Larry barks a lot.
I mean,
how long do you think
he would live
if the Son of Sam started dating your mom?
It literally may get to the point because that dog is fucking every day.
He's starting to smell.
He's starting to rot from the inside.
The only way to kill him might be to get him to the sun and sand.
That might be the only way I can convince Larry to get off the runway and into the sky.
Because he's going to the gay part of heaven, too.
As soon as Larry crotches over, he's going right to your dad's lap.
My dog is gay, gay, gay.
Your mom is so good-hearted and loyal,
she won't let him go.
It's like Paul Verzi's that way.
So loyal, so good-hearted.
He's got two cats that are on the runway,
and he just keeps pumping.
They've both got diabetes.
No, he's a good guy, Paul.
They're peeing all over the place,
and his wife is mad,
but he told the vet, he said,
don't resuscitate.
They were like, it's 400 bucks for no resuscitate of the cats he said put it i've had these cats for
15 years lady i'll put you down before i put these cats down it's just what it is so he sicilians are
also loyal people they're also given to criminality like adopted kids what it is yeah i would put
sicilians and adopted kids as the number two criminals criminal people in the world i fucking
forgot to text paul back he wanted to do his web series yesterday. I'll text him later.
So, yeah.
So now Son of Sam allegedly is in the Sullivan Correctional Center.
He serves.
He's the prison chaplain.
There you go.
Now Son of Sam has become a prison.
He's become a prison priest.
And he has a website where he shares his testimony and other spiritual writings.
So if you want to go to
ariseandshine.org
go to ariseandshine.org
that's Son of Sam's
you know
preachings
and his little fucking homilies
and shit
ariseandshine.org
so yeah
then you can still communicate
with Son of Sam.
He's got new content.
I mean he has a Patreon.
He has a Patreon.
I mean this kid has a Patreon.
He even calls it new content
on his website. Yeah he calls it new content on his website.
Yeah, he calls it new content.
Let's read some of...
Yeah.
Oh, he's got...
Oh, it's all...
Dude, this is not your material.
He's doing somebody else's material for his content.
Yeah.
I mean, he's a fucking thief.
That Bible...
You didn't write that, guy.
You got to come up with your own fucking content.
Yeah, I mean, what is he talking about?
Yeah.
It's getting likes, though.
I mean, nobody likes it.
Zero tweets.
I mean, I got to be honest.
I mean, the kid...
Yeah.
His Twitter's low. Does he have a Twitter, this kid? Hey, what's his Twitter account? What's his Twitter? He does have I mean, nobody likes it. Zero tweets. I mean, I got to be honest. I mean, the kid, yeah. His Twitter's low.
Does he have a Twitter, this kid?
Hey, what's his Twitter account?
What's his Twitter?
He does have a Twitter, right?
Yeah.
Let's go check this kid's Twitter.
Cuz, I'm going to fucking troll him bad.
Yeah.
I'm going to be like, yo, my dog's barking, cuz.
He wrote my apology.
He's got videos.
I mean, this is a weird website.
Go to ariseandshine.org.
Yeah, let's...
Cuz, whenever you see the sky with a sunset
it's always some religious shit here we go as i have communicated many this is from david berkowitz
as i've communicated many times throughout the years i am deeply sorry for the pain suffering
and sorrow i have brought upon the victims of my crimes i grieve for those who are wounded and for
the family members of those who have lost a loved one because of my selfish actions i regret i
regret what i've done and i'm haunted by it i love that he of my selfish actions. I regret what I've done, and I'm haunted by it.
I love that he called it selfish actions.
Is it really selfish to murder people in their car?
I think you chose the wrong adjective.
I think it's evil.
It's evil, yeah.
Not a day goes by that I don't think about the suffering
I've brought to so many.
Likewise, I cannot even comprehend all the grief and pain
that they live with now,
and these individuals have every right to be angry with me too.
Wow, he's saying he's involved in the Me Too movement.
Nevertheless, I apologize for the crimes I committed.
My continual prayer is that as much as possible,
these hurting individuals can go on with their lives.
In addition, I'm not writing this apology for pity or sympathy.
I simply believe that such an apology is the right thing to do,
and by the grace of God,
I have to do my very best to make amends whenever and wherever possible,
both to society and to my victims.
Well, David, what I say to you is thanks for your apology, but here's the entrance
to the bear cave. Yeah. So that's the one caveat. The ancient Greek said there's no rule without an
exception. That's the one caveat to the Timshel is that if you're a psychopath, I don't think you
have a choice. Like, do you believe him? Do you believe he's a reformed person? Do you believe
he's a good person? Do you think he really cares about those victims?
Don't you think instead of calling it selfish,
he would have called it evil or something?
I think I caught him right there.
Yeah, cuz, and I think I am the exception to the rule.
I think I'm Chrissy Caveat.
I think that's what my new name should be.
Why's that?
It used to be Chrissy Cavanaugh.
It's Chrissy Cavanaugh, now it's Chrissy Caveat.
Now it's Chrissy Kamala Harris.
Why do you think you're Chrissy Caveat?
Because doesn't caveat mean like exception to the rule?
I don't know.
It's a French word.
Who knows?
Do you know how many times I've said,
can I get a caveat Sauvignon Blanc or whatever?
A cabernet.
You guys got caveats here?
Yeah.
Yeah.
You're the exception to the rule.
You are the exception to the rule.
Caveat is a reservation.
The guy, The police sergeant
Who took Berkowitz's
Initial confession
His name was Joseph Coffey
Joseph Coffey
That guy's name was
Joseph Coffey
Cause Joseph Coffey
And the other guy was named
Was it Borelli?
Yeah Borelli
Fucking sauce monkey
Cause I just want to
Give a shout out
We haven't even read
The Patreon names yet
But I want to give a shout out
Cause I saw it
And when I see it
By accident and it's
that good it deserves a little moment of worship okay the name is something like well no it slices
the garlic thin or else it gets something again and i don't know what it is well we gotta fucking
you gotta have the actual name yeah you're probably gonna win whoever you are wherever you are um
okay go down a little bit because why does mikey look like he's
a fighter pilot with his outfit yeah he's got headphones because he looks like he's in top gun
with tom cruise i know fucking yeah so oh uh yeah mikey's fighter pilot mikey listen listen i feel
like with son of sam i mean 1977 you know the the country, it feel, I'll say this.
It was a heat wave.
The economy was no good.
There were a lot of people upset.
It feels like we're ripe for a new serial killer.
Son of Sam might be coming in 2020.
Well, history.
It's posh.
History always repeats itself.
So they always say, if you want to know what's going to happen in the future, always look back.
And that's what I've been doing recently.
And I read and got obsessed after we announced this topic to each other and i went and i watched
documentaries on 77 you should go look at them for yourself there's a lot of parallels you can
see now then a lot of people fleeing the city uh there's uh riots uh the economy's tanking
rampant prostitution we got a big big rampant prostitution But except there's no prostitution right now because of Corona.
I mean, Corona has really hurt these girls.
No, the toots are back.
Onlyfans.
But toots are coming back.
Toots are in Europe.
Toots are back.
Business is booming again in Amsterdam.
The toots are coming back.
Don't you think toots should be legal?
I do.
You do, right, Venetia?
I don't see.
With this feminist movement, how can you tell me that I can't use my body for sex?
If it's like one of outright feminism,
then that has to be legal too
because it's absolutely anti-feminist
to tell a woman she can't use her body
and her God-given gifts to make money for men.
Absolutely.
Or guys.
Or guys.
Or guys.
Or guys.
Yeah, like, listen, why is that a like listen Why is that a problem
Why is that a crime
It's bullshit
I mean if you have that
If you're
First of all
If you're born as a guy
And you have that gift
Like you can sort of
Like whoever it is
Whoever pays you
You can bang them out
And do it
Yeah
Like
We're stifling
That person's talent somewhere
There's someone out there
Who will bang you
I mean if you
If a one legged woman
Wanted to bang a hot
Male prostitute Do you knowitute, he would do it.
Do you know how much rape and sexual assault would go down if prostitution was a legal thing that guys could do with no problem at all?
They would go in there and have sex with women and get it out of their system.
And then I guarantee you sexual assault and rape would go down a lot if prostitution became legal.
Because of these little bitch guys that feel like women don't want them and they can never have sex and they get so fed up whereas if they just unleash
it and bury their gay in a prostitute's pussy they i'm telling you it would go down i guarantee you
it would go down am i wrong on that can i legally not say that is that a problem because veneti is
looking at me like you can say that and how come we have not made a clip of me saying that he buries
his gay and somebody's it's a, very funny thing you want to say.
Neil deGrasse Tyson is going to tweet it and give me the credit for it.
No, but he makes a good point, right?
Like, is that not a good point, what he's saying?
Is that wrong?
I think it's a good point.
Yeah.
I mean, I think that men and women should, you know, prostitute themselves out.
I mean, we allow stripping.
There's a very thin line in between, isn't there?
Yeah.
Yeah, no, it's stupid.
It's a stupid thing that hopefully President Kamala Harris legalizes toots.
I mean, if you say you're legalizing toots, you'll get my vote.
I mean, you know, you district it.
You put it in a certain place because you don't want it in the business district.
You give it its own district like they do in Europe, like they have in Amsterdam.
You can decriminalize the same thing with drugs. Why don't they decriminalize the use, but criminalize the
sale like they do in Portugal? Can you go back one of those pictures? It's good ideas.
Here's an early picture of Giannis. Go back one more. You can't tell me the divorce rate
wouldn't go down either, right? Because look, it would give a safe way for men to cheat without having an
affair and women we know are cheating anyway they're just better at hiding it they did a study
once is 50 of married women cheat you guys just are quiet about it so it's like and then men
cheat and then they lose half their fortune so i mean who really is in control yeah when tiger woods
when tiger woods got fucking when tiger woods lost 250250 million during his divorce,
do you think he was going, God damn it?
Yeah.
God damn it.
We got to do something with this fucking patriarchy.
Yeah, we got to do something with this patriarchy,
and it's just brutal.
Yeah, I mean, yeah.
What can you do?
Wait a second.
Go back.
That's what I said.
I mean, that looks like you.
I said that looks like you.
You think that looks like me, but that looks like you. I said here's
Giannis from a few minutes ago. No, but look at that face. Does that
look like Chrissy or me? Let's put it up on the Patreon
and decide. Because it looks
maybe a combination of us. Is that
our aunt and uncle? That's our aunt and uncle.
Go to patreon.com slash Bay Ridge Boys. We're going
to put this up on the community board. Put that up.
Who is it? Is it me
or is it Yanni P?
Listen, also go to chrissycom.com, historyhyenas.com.
I got shows August 29th, Monmouth Racetrack, Oceanport, New Jersey.
The show is August 21st, 22nd at Governors Long Island.
Sold out.
So if you want to come, stand by, whatever.
But 29th, we have tickets left.
Oceanport, New Jersey, Monmouth Racetrack, christycomedy.com, historyhyenas.com.
Also get merch.
We got a lot of cute merch.
Get our merch and come see me at Distress Factory
in New Jersey, October 3rd and 4th.
The last shows I'll be doing before baby Gianna
comes to the planet.
And the last ones I'll be doing for a long time after that
because of Karony probably.
And let me tell you guys,
go to see Gianna's at Distress Factory
because it's the best outdoor setup probably in the country right now.
The guy who owns the club, Vinnie Brand, spent a lot of money to make it look nice on the outside and it's all safe.
It's all socially distanced.
I was there just this past weekend and it was a fucking massive heat wave and it still was great.
So go see Gianni in October when it's going to be nice and pleasant.
It's like you get the tickets now yeah october 3rd and 4th uh yannispappascomedy.com for tickets
or stressfactory.com get your tickets come see me or historyhyenas.com or historyhyenas.com get
our merch we got all types of shirts do we have the yanni long day shirt out yanni long day shirt
is available go get your mugs wet by by the Morning merch. Reality is a suggestion. It's a hot seller.
What's our hot sellers? Our logo.
Reality is a suggestion. Baby
Gorgeous. Ladder 14.
Go get it. We got Wei Zhong Xin.
We got Smithtown Water
Department. We got Honey Bubbles.
We got Team Cute.
Keep coming up. We'll make
as many t-shirts as you want.
Keep getting them. They're high, high quality.
They last for a couple of minutes.
So get them.
That's what it is.
Get them.
We missed a call with our accountant today.
We did.
What can you do?
We're going to do some Patreon names as always.
Like Chris says, we encourage you to join the Patreon.
And when you do, we ask you to, you know, if you want,
leave a funny name. We read them and we issue a PPW for the funniest one.
If you don't want to leave a funny name, just do a normal name.
We call you straight to the back.
You're just here for the content.
Why do we call it straight to the back?
Because back in the day in the video stores, the porn sections were always in the back.
The guys who were here for the porn section would lower their hat and walk straight to the back.
They were here for the content.
So that's you.
So let's hear some funny names.
Let's see. Hold on.
Okay, let me just get them here on my
phone. Okay, so the newest
members of the patriarchy who went to the matriarchy.
I'm sorry. I'm going to scold myself.
The matriarchy, patreon.com slash
Bay Ridge Boys. Leading off, we got Matthew
Heavy Peen Peroni.
Kid's got a heavy peen. He gets on a Drexel list
for that. Then we got Gary.
The nickname's going to bomb DeStefias.
He was right.
Then we got Ray Nervous Gervais Gervais.
Then we got Grant.
It's hard to think of a name, but make no mistake,
I'll smack Charlemagne and fuck John McCain.
Put him on the list.
Put him on the list, yeah.
There it is.
Then we got What Were You Doing With My Wife at 3 a.m.,
Power Washing LLC.
Kid got his, I mean, sneaky.
He got his LLC's power washing.
Yeah, here we got, I think we got Homer coming up.
I think we got a home run hitter coming up to the plate right here.
Strap up.
Father Bill sucked my binky, but my name's not Mike.
Obviously catapulted him straight onto the list.
Yeah.
Then we got Matthew Carpenter.
Then we got Yams, a full three euro looking to gobble Giannis' Giro.
Gorchak.
Okay.
It actually wasn't bad.
I think he's a sufferer of a bad read there because he was tough, but it was decent.
Yeah.
I'm going to give him a Drexler because I know it was a good one.
Yeah.
Then we got Marky.
Party's fully charged with lip gloss on his Stingstar Mook.
That guy won last week, right?
That guy won last week.
So we're just going to keep reading them.
I was told specifically,
just keep reading them.
Dr. Julian,
why are there so many Sprite cans
on the streets now?
Pino.
Then we got...
Just funny,
the kid may work for Sprite
and just got a little micro ad in there.
Who knows?
They got John Schwarzel.
Then we got Lickanyani's balloon knot
while Chrissy fills me with his gooey hot.
Okay. Then we got
Tyler Fivas, Paul, Stephen White,
Evan. Then we got
I toot out my cute glutes
when I shoot Dan.
Then we got Leaky Squeaky Pseudo Pee Pee
of the Weekie. Yes. Put him on the list.
Put him on the list. Then we got David
Canales, Few Monkey, Javier Gutierrez.
Then we got Reese, I Love It From Behind Da I Hate China, Gay, Kinda, Trump, 2020.
Oh, Gay Kinda.
I Love It From Behind, I Hate China, Gay Kinda, Trump, 2020.
Yeah, yeah, I got to put him on the list.
Then we got Hunter Tovey, Julian Levy, Vincent Goff.
Then we got Make No Mistake, Hillary Is Coming For Chrissy Cons it's just what it is uh garrett dillard then we got
cute but vicious pig whore um okay then we got carlin i'm polish but my sausage is more like a
cooked breakfast link hans hashtag joelistic it's a good one it's a drexler. I mean, if it was executed better, it would have been on the list. Okay. Then we got Nom Q, Josh, Noah P, and Chrissy D,
like to Joe pigeons in trees with $3 bills because we're full-blown TBG.
Okay.
Then we got Ray Soto, Stephen Lockwood, Alan Walensky.
Then we got Johnny, almost cute, 7 out of 10 angles agree.
7 out of 10 angles agree.
Put him on a list.
Then we got Larry Tosmo.
Then we got Chrissy Corona and Yanni Baboni.
Please crack me open and plague my punani.
Okay.
Then we got Justin.
Father Bill ate a blue chew and cracked me wide open,
but my mom's actually my dad, so it's just what it is.
Stifler.
I lost a little bit of it during the laugh.
Can you just give it again?
Then we got Justin.
Father Bill ate a blue chew and cracked me wide open,
but my mom's actually my dad, so it's just what it is.
Yeah, that's a good one.
It goes on the list.
Then we got Harold and Fumar go to White Castle.
Put them on the list.
Wow.
Chicken finger contender.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Then we got Dan Smith, William Diaz, Chelsea Tresol.
Then we got Vinny.
My no-no was a true blue Italian toot with Doug the Poop Shoot Moco.
Who dug the poop shoot, Moco.
Oh, okay.
Who dug the poop shoot.
So he's saying his grandmother used to take it to the ass.
I mean, what can you do?
Yeah, what can you do?
What can you do?
Then we got Michael.
I had to find a new Chris D podcast to watch,
so please only groom Poppy Gianni's back hair Guido.
Oh, okay.
Chris D podcast.
I see.
Cause he's saying D'Elia.
Bob Lazar stole my spaceship.
Then we got Tyrone Chadwick.
Then we got Mexican cuzzy.
At least I'm not a muzzy.
Poppy Trump 2020.
Yo, yeah.
We can't say we don't condone that.
Jeffrey Lawrence, Darrely's, Corey Gutterman, Trevor Guzman,
Patty All Potatoes, No Meat Walsh, Andrew Berg.
Then we got Huey Lewis and the Jews control the media.
I mean, Jesus Christ.
Yeah, we can't.
I don't care.
That's going on the list.
Huey Lewis and the Jews.
Yeah.
Wei Zhongzhen.
Put it on the list. I don't care. I don't care. It's? Yeah. Wei Zhongzhen. Put it on the list.
I don't care. I don't care. It's that good.
Wei Zhongzhen. Chrissy, take me to Florida.
Give me the drip. Corey,
Stephen F. Then we got Adam Ginsberg.
Then we got, I'm 25 and recently
broken up with Can I Get Pistachio Ice Cream?
Then we got
Ed Likes to Boogie. Then we got
Fruitcake Frank. Fruitcake Frank
is getting a Drexler. Drexler. Then we got Eastern H Frank. Fruitcake Frank is getting a Drexler.
Drexler.
Then we got Eastern Hemi from Queens and my friends at Sandra Dee.
So they call us Harold and Fumar.
It's what it is.
This happens all the time.
Wow.
But we get something like a Harold and Fumar or a new thing that's great.
And then we get it again in the same list.
Wow.
Like when we had Father $3 bill.
Yes.
It's so bizarre. Well, there's an old axiom that says nothing is more powerful than an idea.
That's time it is to come.
And Harold and Fumar, your time has come.
It's what it is.
Yeah, so what do we do with that guy, though?
It's not fair.
I mean, I don't know.
I guess just put him on the list.
So if, because they're both the same.
So if they win, they both win.
Yeah.
Then we got Neil Desmond, Aaron Teixeira.
Then we got MAGA, Make America Gay Again.
Yeah, give him a chicken finger.
Then we got Ava Hamilton.
Then we got Lucas McMinn.
Then we got Greek Cutie with the smoothie who's a little fumey,
but please tell Venetia I'll treat her nice and take her to my parents' village.
Said he's a little fumey, though.
Yeah.
On the list yeah
yeah
then we got
Mary Ellen
and Brendan Flaherty
then we got
Marijuana Slippers
then we got
Venetia Lies
about pizza pies
going to Chrissy's thighs
I get it
Drexler
then we got
Nick Ramirez
John Flowers
then we got
Mike Hetero Italian
in the past
now Giannis' feet
are in my ass.
It's a character piece, Luongo.
On to the list.
Jesus, this is a strong one.
This is a real Hall of Famer.
Then we got the Democrats made John Starks shoot two for 18 in Game 7 of the 1994 NBA Finals,
a.k.a. Lieutenant Linguini, because my piece is al dente.
Wait, I'm sorry.
I fucked that up.
I'm sorry.
I know you want to go quick, but I fucked it up.
I take it.
Then we got the Democrats made John Starks shoot two for 18 in Game 7 in the 1994 NBA
Finals, a.k.a.
Lieutenant Linguini, because my piece is al dente.
Drexler.
Yeah.
Two almost there.
Then we got Nikki G makes no sense, roll me in a burrito and throw me over the fence.
That's it. All right. So me in a burrito and throw me over the fence. That's it.
All right.
So we got a couple bangers.
So it's either going to be the Fumar.
And what's the other ones?
What do we got?
Leaky, squeaky, pseudo PP of the week.
Yas, that's a good one.
Right.
Rise, I love it from behind.
I hate China.
A gay kind of Trump 2020.
Father Bill sucked my binky, but my name's not Mike.
That's a goodie.
Grant, it's hard to think of a name,
but make no mistake,
I'll smack Charlemagne
and fuck John McCain.
That's a good one,
but what was the Jew one?
Harold and Fomar go to White Castle.
He's going to win over the two of them.
Or Huey Lewis and the Jews
control the media,
ladder 14. So it's reallyy lewis and the jews control the media ladder 14 so it's really
between huey lewis and the jews huey lewis and the jews or uh kumal and uh harold and fumar go to
castle i think it's harold and fumar go to white what do you guys think harold and fumar go to
white castle you are the winner and those two that was what you call a fucking photo finish.
But Hall of Fame right away
for both of them.
Absolutely.
Yeah.
Thank you so much.
Appreciate all the support.
Stay gay.
We really hope you enjoyed
that episode,
whatever it was about.
This is just a stock thing
that we're taping
on temporary episode.
So go make sure
you rate, review us,
subscribe,
turn on your notifications,
get jiggy with it.
And go to patreon.com slash bayridgeboards where things get really wild.