History Hyenas with Chris Distefano and Yannis Pappas - 166 - It's our Birthday! YASSSS!

Episode Date: September 2, 2020

Chris Distefano and Yannis Pappas celebrate their 40th Birthday! YAAAS Happy Birthday to the boys!! They both have a birthday a day apart, how cute?!Chris can’t go to the Renaissance Fair or Midevil Times this year and so the guys are thinking what to do? Go with Venatifa and her parea to talk social justice issues, carry bags with Binky or give their birthday to Kamala Harris and celebrate her?!Also we’re filming this a few weeks before so what is going on right now!? Is Joe Biden still around, did Governor Cuomo cancel Chrissy D’s shows because of social distancing regulations and who is on notice!?They boys go down memory lane, reflecting on the year and where really wanted to be! Chris is happiest when with the baby, Yannis when touring a museum or smoking a cigar. Their fondest memories are in Munich, Germany, Salzburg, Vienna and Antietam Battlefield. They also take a scroll through YouTube and past classics eps like Battle of Crete, Frank Rizzo and amazing guests like Bill Burr!Make sure to wish the boys Happy Birthday to the boys and tell us your favorite part so we can CLIP IT!!!Want more Hyena content? Check out www.patreon.com/bayridgeboys where things get really WILD!Follow us!: 🙆🏼‍♂️🐕🙆🏻‍♂️🙆🏼‍♂️Chris Distefano on Instagram, Twitter, website🙆🏻‍♂️Yannis Pappas on Instagram, Twitter, website🐕History Hyenas on Instagram, Twitter, website Subscribe to the poddy woddy on YouTube, iTunes, Spotify, and HH Clips

We don't know if we're on the kamikaze, we don't know if we're on the episode, it doesn't matter, it's our birthday episode! Yeah, and here's the deal, like those kamikazes, you know, if you're ever questioning whether those are true, those are true, he just starts rolling and we don't know. We have, the thing is the cam- It's really like, I'm not sure if I'm comfortable with it because it's a lot of blackmail material. I don't care though, I mean then blackmail me, like I'll just pay you, a lot of blackmail material. I don't care, though. I mean, then blackmail me. I'll just pay you. I don't give a fuck. You don't care.

That's the thing. It's like I just kind of don't care. It's because the thing is, whichever way you slice it, whichever way you throw me, as long as there's black and whites in here and as long as I have the B-A-B-I, I mean, I really don't care. I just don't, you know. You're untouchable when you got black and whites in the B-A-B-I. Yeah.

And when you got your baby gorgeous shirt on B.A.B.I. Yeah. When I got, yeah. And when you got your baby gorgeous shirt on and she's wearing her baby gorgeous shirt. That's the thing. You guys are completely activated and fully charged. And here's the thing. We both have baby gorgeous shirts on, baby gorgeous shirts. And I would have shown her to you. But because some of you fucking animals earmuffs, baby. Animale, you F-bomb animales,

have asked me for pictures of my daughter's feet now? Wait a second. Yeah, I can't ever put her on camera. No, it happened years ago. Somebody was like, hey, what size shoe is she? And it's just like, then you can't go on anymore at all. We had a fan that worked for Nike. Oh. No, I don't know if it was Paige.

I don't know if it was a hyena fan. No, I was about to say, like, I want don't know if it was a hyena's bed. I was about to say, like, I want to call the cops if someone asked for that. Yeah. But they were asking for shoes. No, no, no. No, people send wild messages. When I used to post the B-A-B-I on my feed, people would send wild messages all the time.

I mean, it's just there's sick, mentally ill people out there. So I do have a private Instagram account for the B-A-B-I for friends and family. And certain members of the Patreon have gotten the link to the baby's Instagram. And that's it. And only certain members. No, I'm kidding. Nobody's gotten it. But Lisa Johnson, you can have it.

Lisa Johnson and that's it. Okay. Now, Richie G. Richie G could have it. Now, here's the thing. Here's the thing that's going on on our Patreon right now. First of all, happy birthday. Happy birthday to me. We share a birthday. We're 40. We're 40. If you could take our ages and combine them, we're average about 40. Now listen, for your birthday

this year, did you, did you, are you your actual age? I just gained weight. That's my present to myself. Or did you take away a year? I have let myself accept my body image. And if anyone calls me anything again on the Patreon, I am going to put them on fucking notice. Notice. Because this is the body I feel beautiful in. And this is the body and pressure. I don't need the magazines telling me how to fucking look. I'm putting you all on notice. Yas.

Yeah. V, if you tell me I can't have a zucchini slice one more time, I'm putting you and your whole entire parea on notice. Yes. Yeah. If you tell me I can't have a zucchini slice one more time, I'm putting you and your whole entire Perea on nudists. Yeah. It's nice to see that we're both have tits going into our birthday. No, cause you're in shape. You throw. No,

no, but I have titties. No, no, but I have titties and, and I, and I, this,

the baby gorgeous shirt is the type of shirt when the wind blows, you can see my death ass, but so it's just what it is.. So it's just what it is. Yeah, it's just what it is. And I want to shout out Anthony Esposito, who's my trainer, and training me in the park with six feet away because he's a good kid. He listens to the socially distant rules. Here's what I learned about you. You're a sneaky, sneaky, sneaky, sneaky, fudgy, sneaky little ferret.

Yeah. And I'll tell you why you're a sneaky little ferret because i saw pictures of you when you were in your when you were in your uh division three playing days yes and you were caught i was caught you were ripped so i always thought like this is a kid that can't get caught right but you can get caught but here's what you do and this is why you're a sneaky little ferret and i know about it yeah you go work out you're very disciplined with your workout you work out very very hard right okay but here's what you do at night yeah at night you sneak off yeah and you get yourself a little tiramisu cheesecake after you wash down

your tortellinis yeah uh with a little tiramisu cheesecake in a black and white yeah and then you go to the gym and you work out all day. So that is the result of your lifestyle, which is work out hard during the day with Sergio or Antony and then fucking tortellini by night. You're a tortellini by night type of kid. I'm a tortellini by night. That's the thing. I have a body shaped like a loaf of bread,

but it is whole wheat bread. So that's what it is. So I do look like a loaf of bread. That's not going to change, but it's healthier bread because I do exercise in the mornings but make no mistake because i i go tortellini by night i'm a tortellini hunter at night but that's the motivation to work out in the morning as i say if i want to get my tortellinis and my tiramisu at night if i want to

get my titties at night then i have to work out in the morning so that's what i do you just started holding the dick like a tainty little penis yeah just tainty little penis and that's the thing with us and that thing with us. And that's the thing with this podcast is like people make comments and say, why do they do this? Why do that? We don't know. And more importantly, we don't care. So it's just like people will like people like and like I sold my Murphy bed on my Instagram.

Who bought it? Yeah. And people actually, well, actually, nobody's bought it yet. The truth is I tried to sell my Murphy, and you guys wanted way too much money. So I just threw it out on the curb like my fucking love sack. I was going to take that love sack. If you just were a little patient, I was going to take it and put it up into New Hampshire. Yeah, it's too much.

And cuz, you don't want that love sack. Too many people got banged out on it. Yeah, but why didn't you give it to James to live in? Oh, yeah, I should have. Yeah. Cuz, how was the show with... Did anybody yell, hey, Bert? No, they didn't.

But I just wanted to say, because you were talking about bread, there's only one loaf in here. Yeah. And that loaf is in Binky's pants. Yeah. Because if you took our penises and three of our penises, it would look... Our penises would be Binky's balls.

Yeah. And his penis would be the loaf. It'd be the loaf. Yeah, because, no, Binky's balls, and his penis would be the love. It'd be the love. Yeah, because, no, Binky's got a nice cut of beef. Binky works real hard. He works really fucking hard, Binky. And Bebe's, you know, you feel like my birthday gift. Binky feels like my birthday gift.

Binky, I need some. He's a 27-year-old kid. Binky's a 27-year-old kid, and I need... My blood sugar just dropped. So you need an egg white and avocado croissant. So what's going to happen is at some point, the food is going to get delivered that we order right before the show's starting. We're just going to have to eat on air.

And we may even get the delivery guy on camera and then question him and see if he's got a U.S. passport. We may do that. Yeah. Because we've got to get side jobs because stand-up's done. Should we become ICE members? Should we apply for ICE? I feel like every episode we've done has been our audition tape,

our interview for ICE. Yeah. So the thing is for my birthday, because every year for the last, well, for the past five years, every year in my 30s, every year since I've turned 30, I've either went to one or two places for my actual birthday, either the Renaissance Fair or Medieval Times.

Both of them are closed. Yeah, and I just want to say, what was it, two years ago that we, you pulled me up there? Went to the Ren Fair, yeah. Yeah, it was one of the worst experiences of my life. I didn't have fun at all. I hated it.

I did more than hated it. I hated it. Yeah, because than hated it. I hated it. Yeah. Because it was... Because I hated it so much. Wait, did we go to the fair or did we go to medieval times? I don't know.

We went up there where Mike Cannon lives. Yeah. And we went to some dumb fair. We threw axes. And it was a bunch of white people acting like it was 2,000 years ago. Yeah.

And I didn't want to be there. Was the baby there? The baby was not there. The baby was not there. Yeah. Because, yeah, I love it there so much. and it's unfortunate that venetia you know joined the show like where because you didn't come to my birthday party last year either at the renaissance fair because you were in greece um so so we're talking about how we can't you know there's

nothing to do so our birthday this year because today is wednesday august 26 my actual birthday yesterday was janice's birthday and we're just like this is what August 26 my actual birthday yesterday was Giannis's birthday and we're just like this is what we do now the birthday is kind of just to be with you the fans because everything else is freaking closed every year we just have a birthday episode because our birthdays are so close together this is our combined 40th birthday right um what are we gonna do for it this year during the pandemic we got to figure something out what do you going to do for it this year during the pandemic? We've got to figure something out. What do you want to do? Do you want to have a baby queue? And we'll just call it a baby queue because, you know, baby.

We'll do a baby. We could do that. What do you want to do? Do you want to hang out with Venetia's Perea in Central Park and talk about social justice issues? We could do that. Yeah, we could do that. Why don't we just – Or we could just carry briefcases of equipment with Binky. Yeah, we could do that. Or why don't we just or we could just carry stuff or carry briefcases of equipment with binky

yeah we could do that yeah well why yeah or why don't we just celebrate kamala harris you know what i i didn't realize how selfish we were being yeah this is a historic time for this country right we're an indian african-american or whatever her father no she's half jamaican half jamaican but that makes her an African-American. Yeah, whatever. Her dad is Indian and her mom is Jamaican. Her dad is Jamaican and her mom is Indian. So therefore, she is the first African-American vice presidential candidate. That's just the country we live in.

I'm just saying what it is. It is what it is. But are we being selfish by celebrating our birthdays on such a historic occasion where really this episode should be about? Should we give our birthdays to black people? Yeah. Wei Zhongzhen. Yeah. Yes.

Last one I'm going to pass out. I need a chocolate. I'm having a low blood sugar thing right now. Yeah, you need the microphone to your face. Yeah, it's been a little while since I got lightheaded and it just hit me. I don't know what it is. Yanni Nats, because you did a show last night

and now you're ready to go down. The show is good. Somebody attacked Jay Oakerson because he asked somebody's brother if he's seen her sister's pussy or something. And then he got attacked from behind. That video was bad. Did you see the video? I know.

It was for real. He got kicked off the stage. Yeah, he could have really gotten injured. I think he said something crude to a guy's sister. I mean, the kid does crowd work, and so he got something bad happen. And when you go to Pennsylvania, those kids are just like, he got attacked by a fan's sister. I mean, the kid does crowd work and so he got, something bad happened. When you go to Pennsylvania, those kids are just like, he got attacked by a fan actually.

It was a legion, they were a fan. The kid was a fan. Interesting, but he was probably drunk. But it's also like, if you're a fan, it's just also like,

just shut up. It's like, you have to fucking beat your chest and defend everybody. Shut up. Only defend your family if someone's physically attacking you with a weapon.

Other than that, they're just words. Shut the fuck up. Stop trying to be a tough guy. As a matter of fact, people that do do that, I know they're real pussies because they're just trying to show off in front of females, and you guys are the worst kind of guys. Also, if you're doing a Legion of Skanks show with Legion of Skanks fans, you got to hire security. That's just what it is.

I mean, let's just be honest. Yeah, and also- I mean, there's going to be a lot of people who've done jail time who write your shows yeah and also i'm an adult now like just being adult you know it's on my 40th birthday it's like if you want to talk crap about anybody in my family or anyone i'm close to or love i'm just gonna sue you i don't there's gonna be no reason to get physical anymore i'm just gonna i'm just gonna call my lawyer and you'll be sent to cease and desist and that's it and you can call me puts you all you want because I'll just fucking sue

you. I'm not getting physical with anybody anymore except your mother. That's what we're going to do. For our 40th birthday we're coming at things in a different way. That way it's going to be we're not going to fight. We're going to sue. We're giving our birth. We're totally giving our birthdays to black people this year.

Our birthdays are and we're not celebrating our birthdays. We're going to sit. We're totally giving our birthdays to black people this year. Our birthdays are, and we're not celebrating our birthdays. We're going to sit. We're going to eat kale salads. We're going to take our socks and shoes off and we're going to watch Kamala Harris YouTube speeches from the primary. That's what I can. That's what we have to work with.

Yeah. And wait, and listen, and look, the truth is, is that we're filming this episode about two weeks before our birthday. So we don't know by the time this come out,

Joe Biden could be dead. We don't know. We're not sure. Today is August 26th. If the big news has been Joe Biden passed away in his sleep from old age, then we're sorry that you had to go through that, but we don't know about it yet. It's just a call from the future.

Yeah. And thanks to all the History Hyena fans who came out in Royer. I was at that festival the day before Jay Oakison was. A lot of History Hyena fans who came out in Royer for his. I was at that festival the day before Jay Oakison was. A lot of History Hyena fans. The whole crowd was History Hyena fans. Thank you to you guys, and thank you for not yelling, hey, Bert, because then we would have had a long day. Chrissy would have got a message with a question mark.

Appreciate it. I see you, Bubbles. So I appreciate that. Thank you. Also, I am going to be at Distress Factory in New Jersey, which is New Brunswick. Yes. October 3rd and 4th. So get your tickets if you're in the New Brunswick, New Jersey area.

And the good news about those shows with Giannis is Vinnie Brand, the owner who normally does about an hour worth of time before, because you guys are coming out and buying tickets so quick, he will not do any stand-up on the show. So it's great. So thank you guys so much. You don't know how much you guys buying tickets to go see us at the stress factory means because that means he we don't have to deal with him yeah so it's perfect it is a good it's just perfect yeah yeah so thank you for that thank you yeah and i'll be august uh 29th today's the 26th so three days i'll be in monmouth at the so go to christycomedy.com Oceanport, New Jersey I'm sorry

the shows at Governor's Long Island that happened last week August 21st, 22nd they're all sold out they asked me to add two shows

and the answer is I'm not going to do it because I barely want to do the four that I already have sold out so I'm not going to add two more and there's not many

tickets left for Monmouth either there's not many tickets left for Monmouth but those I want to do because the truth of the situation is this, my fans and loved ones, is Monmouth is giving about five times the amount of money Governor's is for selling the same amount of tickets. So I just don't want to work for free anymore.

Even though I know people are dying in a pandemic, so am I. Way, Jong-Jun. Here's the thing. Also, it's better to do one show than it is to do five. Yeah, to do one show. We're not going to be doing the five show thing too much longer. The five show thing, the adding the show, the one Thursday, two Friday, two Saturday,

it's just not for me anymore. It's not for any, it was never for anyone because the truth is you do the first one and then you phone in the second one because doing comedy over and over again, it's just, it's very hard.

It's very hard and as the person on stage, I just, I don't want to, I don't want to, even when I do one show at eight o'clock and to rev the engines up to do the next one at 10 o'clock, I don't want to, I don't want to, even when I do one show at 8 o'clock and to rev the engines up to do the next one at 10 o'clock, I don't want to do that at all anymore.

I just want to give you all I got at 8 o'clock and then forget where I was and wake up, you know, on somebody's couch again. That's just what I want to do. You know, it's going to be funny. You should start saying at your shows that you don't want to be here.

I guarantee you the crowd cheers. Yeah. And because like, that's become almost like a catchphrase on our podcast. They just know you don't want to be here. No, I want to be here for the podcast. No, no, I want to be here for the podcast. And I want to be, I want, I'm here.

But the stand up is just, yeah, to do one and then come back and then do two in a night, two in a night. It's just, dude, I want to just do one show at your club. Give me whatever you can. Just give me 100% of the door. You make the food and drinks and then I'll fucking leave. That's just what i want no but let's be honest let's be honest let's be honest has there ever been a moment in your life where you 100 wanted to be where you were i'm not talking 90 or 85 i'm talking 100 what like your mind was there like when you were hooping, you were worrying about where your ex-girlfriend is. Yeah, I used to bring my cell phone out to the bench and send texts to my ex-girlfriend

to make sure she got home safe in the middle of a college basketball game. Yeah, you're a kid who... I would make believe I couldn't breathe, even though I was in good shape. I'd be like, oh, I need a breather from the coach just so I can text my girlfriend. Yeah, so... Because I had full anxiety disorder. Yeah, I think your nickname's going to be claustrophobic chrissy you just you always give yourself you want to have an escape you want to hatch i gotta be you gotta be somewhere else a little bit at the same time i gotta be honest if

i if i'm being if that if i'm answering that seriously the only time i ever want to be anywhere is at the park with the baby when i'm at the park with the baby pushing her in the swing it's just the best because i'm like she's here i'm pushing her i'm just lost to the moment but yeah pretty much anywhere else there's oh there's a part of me you're gonna get mostly 90 of me wanting to be 97 that is good right but yeah but most of the time yeah there's been times where we've i've been in mid-flight on an airplane and i'm like i just want to jump out the emergency exit because i just don't want to be here i just want to fucking i just want to change it up a little bit yeah there needs to you need it you're you're a skate patch chrissy you need an escape escape pod i'm a skate pod chrissy yeah you need like you gotta walk you

should walk around with a parachute yeah in a bag just and be like why is that kid wearing a parachute it's like because if any second he just may want to jump out the window and get out of here yeah no i'm very thankful to the fans for supporting us. I need the food to come because I'm lightheaded. Yeah. Shout out to fans. Thank you guys so much for always supporting us. We really do appreciate it.

I just have a wild anxiety disorder and it's what it is. It's not that big of a deal. It's a good thing. It makes you who you are. Yeah. The fans, the thing about our fans is they love you exactly as you. Go ahead. No, just go ahead.

Take a full call. It doesn't matter. No, because I had to check. No, because I had to check because the baby's here and her mom may have to get her. So I thought she texted me, but she did not. Why? Is her mom coming up? No, no, no, no, no, no, no.

I may have to bring her there in a minute, but it's fine. Okay, well, we're good. Whatever we could do, we could just take the cameras off and just follow you and keep doing the podcast absolutely yeah that's why that's why binky always has his cameras ready to go that thing the beautiful thing about binky is you could be on the move or stay put it doesn't matter here's the thing about binky binky comes from such a long line of working class irish potato monkeys right that the kid is like a high-tech intellectual kind of camera producer now right i mean he's a real producer but the kid finds way to do manual labor right he's the type of kid it's in his genes to lift shit so even around the apartment i bet you with his piece

of a wife yeah like he's just like he wants to lift shit yeah his wife's like let's order food and he's like no no let me go pick it up and carry it back. Yeah. When there's no reason to. Yeah, there's no... You notice that? The kid enjoys it. Yeah, because there's actually... I even said this morning, I was like, can I help you? And he said, no, no, I got it.

And then he came in carrying one on his head. Yeah. The kid just wants to do manual labor. Yeah, because there's really no reason he has to even take the cameras down anymore, but he just does it anyway. Look, we're all equal. We're all human beings. We're all homo sapiens sapiens.

But make no mistake, if you don't think that our cultures get into our DNA, it's what it is. I mean, Venetia just always, there's a part of her that wants to be outdoors in a cafe in Greece, relaxed, telling people she's working when she's not working with a pack of Marlboro Lights and a coffee

for 12 hours with Perea. And there's just nothing that's not working with a pack of Marlboro lights and a coffee for 12 hours with Perea yeah and there's just nothing that's going to change that right because you can ask a Greek what they're doing and they'll say that they're working and then you'll say where are you and they'll say we're at the Caffeinea like and then it'll take 12 years for the country to go bankrupt and people will say we work so hard and you're like so how's your country bankrupt and they'll say it's the Jews fault and that's just what Greeks do. The Germans and Jews did it and you're like, but I thought you were working hard.

It's like, yeah, I was working hard taking calls at the Caffeinea. Yeah. And you're just a German kid so there'll always be a part of you that'll just look at swarthy people and be like,

I'm not saying it's a better world, but maybe would it be a better world if we cleaned that up and moved things a little quicker. You know what? You know what? You know what? Interesting you say that. Do you know the only other time I 100% wanted to be where I was?

Do you remember we were in Munich and we found that little cafe behind those buildings and I got myself a piece of black forest cake, which is from the black forest of Germany, and I sat there and I took a call from the truffle pig and I had a cup of iced coffee, German iced coffee, and a black cake and it started to drizzle a little bit and it was about 50 degrees and I was wearing my leather jacket and my sweatshirt and my jeans are a little too tight on the upper part of my thighs because that's where I carry my weight and my Jordans. And I just almost started to cry when I was slowly eating that cake because you, I remember you were like off, like looking at, you know, you're looking at the top of the church and just kind of like just gaze looking at it and i was kind of you were

there so i knew you were safe i had just talked to the baby you were looking at the sky i was getting hit in the rain and eating my chocolate cake a black forest cake and there was just a uh i believe it was a smiling refugee cleaning the tables and i just felt happy way John Jan yeah yeah I'm kidding about the Smalley and I just did that to be silly Willie but everything else was I remember I remember in Munich Somalian refugee and you make it all the way to Munich and you got a job that's actually a very good life no I'm kidding around yeah I'm kidding it's a very good life you have a job you're in Germany you're not in Somalia anymore that's a very good yeah no no I was I was kidding around. Yeah, I'm kidding around. It's a very good life. You have a job. You're in Germany. You're not in Somalia anymore. That's a very good life.

No, no. I was kidding. I don't even remember there. But I do remember the cafe, that, and I remember being in Austria. And if you're a Somalian and you become a congresswoman, it is evidence of systemic racism in the country that you're in. And we need to dismantle the entire system and rebuild it. I remember also a second moment. We were in Austria sitting on top of that castle drinking beers, looking out

at the beautiful scenery in Austria and Salzburg. I remember we were drinking beers and we'd just eaten a really good food and I had just gotten tits from the girl who worked at the bagel store to my phone and it was just one of those beautiful moments. Because we sat up, we were in Salzburg, Germany.

We went up to that castle and we sat down. The sun was setting behind. Those were, I think, the Alps in the foreground. They were the Alps. They were talking about, in that history, about how the Germans had come in and beat the shit out of some country that tried to invade maybe France, and they had killed a bunch of them right on that plane,

and it was just beautiful. But they had a little restaurant overlooking that view. It was one of the most breathtaking views i've ever seen in my life it was breathtaking because i had gotten tits from the girl from the bagel store sent to my phone and because the whole time and also remember i was really enjoying it because what i had started doing because we were in europe i was having a coffee and we were no we were having brews and i just started ripping marlboro lights it's just what it was i remember if my wife i was gonna say yeah i remember we had to keep making videos ripping butts we had to we had to keep i had to keep redoing videos and keep

getting honest's approval if i could post the video of the beautiful things we've seen because if there was smoke in the background he was like my wife's gonna know i'm smoking and then and then mrs poppins texted me says my husband's smoking in germany and i just wrote back a german response i just said yeah not to do them you were really at peace in germany you were really at peace i loved it especially when you didn't because when you didn't when your phone didn't work yeah was the most peace i've ever seen you and we were because there was a combination of things that happened we tapped into your childhood where a lot of the good things that make you who you are right happened which was you and your mom hopping on and off tour buses.

Right, which is what we did. You got to plan it, and you loved it. Because I was like, I don't know how this works, and you went like this. You jumped. Actually, he skipped and jumped in front of me like a superhero, and he said, hold up, stop. And he got really effeminate, and he went, hold up, stop. This is where my expertise and he started

voguing i didn't know what was happening he was like let me take it from here yeah i know exactly how to plan a tour day i've been doing this since i was little with my mom he was like let me take control you enjoy i'm in control let me drive this that's what you said i remember you going let me drive this and then from that moment on right our fucking tour week was so organized stacked we were on and off tour buses we were in museums world war ii history tours from the german from the nazis point of view wild shit we saw i let you take the reins yeah i let you take control and boy did i have a pleasurable tour experience the only problem are fucking gifted at that only issue we ran into where yannis did have to jump in is when we went to when we took the uh

when we went on a tour i planned a tour for us to go to dachau concentration camp and i showed up with this birthday hat on way jong-jan way jong-jan way jong-jan Wei Zhongzhen. Wei Zhongzhen. Wei Shanshan. Wei Shanshan. That wasn't your fault though. I was just joking. I did it for a bit. I did it for a bit.

I think what they did was horrible and it makes me not proud to be German. But if I would have showed up with this cone hat on, it would have got a laugh from Yanni and that's what it's about. Can you imagine if we went to DACA with birthday hats on yeah i mean yeah yeah i just don't want to get i need food yeah yanni's gonna pass

yanni's gonna go down on the birthday episode here's the good thing here's the good thing venetia can't help us at all because it's not her fault but i love looking at her and saying it because she just greek culture you know she just knows that she could get hit if she doesn't get us food. Yeah, she just could get us food. Yeah, I mean, sometimes village rules apply, and that's still in our DNA. She knows if she doesn't get me food that I'm going to either kill her favorite lamb or the lamb that she told me we can't eat, I'm just going to kill it in revenge. That's what it is.

Or she better bring me food or else the fuck, if the fat is not fucking sliced in, get it yeah it's what it is yeah thank you yeah but you know and it's like vanity she says she has bruises on her leg she's like oh i fell off my bike but then i did i was following uh her brother on instagram he was like i'm hungry tonight and then she comes and then and then it's just one of those things where it's like he posts a video he's hungry and then the next morning she shows up with bruises yeah so i i don know. Yeah. And listen, we're joking. It's not, that's what we do professionally. Yes.

We make light of horrible things. We don't condone hitting a woman unless the garlic is not sliced thin enough. It's what it is. That is a really, you can hit a woman, right? Or a man. What is the baby doing,

by the way? Yes. She's watching TV. Okay. I'm sorry. No, dude, eat. So I think, I think, you know, because it's a. Okay. I'm sorry. I just need... No, dude, eat. So I think, because it's a birthday episode,

I like just recounting fun memories and I think Germany was one. Also, I had a great time when we went to Antietam. Remember when we went to Antietam Battlefield and we put on

Union soldier hats? But then we had to... My mom... We had to leave early because your mom had a false alarm. Your parents have almost... Throughout the course

of our friendship, your mom and dad have almost died about 20 times. Yeah. They keep going down and coming back. Yeah, that was a false love. Your parents have almost, your parents, throughout the course of our friendship, your mom and dad have almost died about 20 times. Yeah. They keep going down and coming back. Yeah, that was, that was a rough one. I almost still don't believe your dad's dead.

Yeah, he may pop back up. He might pipe back up. He may pop back up. You never know. Yeah, I remember that was a rough one, but we, we, we, we found out. Thank God your mom was okay. But I remember still,

you went. Relatively okay. Well, yeah. But I'm saying, she didn't pass away. Thank God. So, but again, this is, you know,

we're doing this episode two weeks in the future so I don't know what's happened these last two weeks it's just what it is it's just anybody could die my dad could be dead too

it's what it is we don't know what's gonna happen we don't know what's gonna happen my dad's hanging on for dear life in Florida yeah

we're going wild on this episode but I remember Antietam was fantastic and so funny we started doing history videos there and then as Union soldiers

we were on the battlefield where the most collective losses of the civil war were were taken especially the union army lost so many men at the battle of antietam and they showed they showed in that battle on that battlefield where the union lined up and where the confederates lined up and yanni went and took a piss on the confederate battle line good i went and took a that's a real story that's a real story yeah i went and took a piss on the Confederate battle lines, and I did it. I did it for our country. I mean, it's a felony offense what you did, but what can you do?

You can't prove it, Antietam. Yeah, I mean, and isn't that ironic that it's a felony offense considering the union was fighting on the side of the federal government? They should actually have little spots on the field where you can take a piss on the dead bodies of Confederate soldiers. It's just what it is because of what they do. But it's the same thing as we've been talking about for weeks and weeks and weeks.

You can't say the Chinese virus, but the Chinese are shaving Muslims' heads and putting them in re-education camps. It's just a wild, wild world we live in. But what can you do? I'm very happy to have our first black female vice presidential candidate whose dad is African American candidate. Yes. Whose dad's Jamaican and mom's Indian. indian yes yes it's just really good and also yes okay you guys were right and

because we got multiple complaints about our previous episode we got one major fact wrong it's not called it wasn't the ted offense it wasn't the it wasn't whatever it was from the vietnam that started vietnam it was uh it was not the Vietnam Started Vietnam It was It was Not the Tet Offensive It was the Gulf of Tonkin Can you just google that To make sure So we will do an episode

On both Eventually we'll do an episode On the Tet Offensive And the Gulf of Tonkin Right They're both wild It was my I misspoke

And And then the fucking Our fans went wild I apologize We are not real historians, so I'm sorry. It's what it is. Yeah, so I confused the Tet Offensive

with the Gulf of Tonkin. It's what it is. And if you don't know what we're talking about, Google it so then you learn. Because here's the thing. We're hyenas that do history, so we get it wrong a lot, but I think it's fun

because it inspires people to go learn what actually happened. What actually happened. And what they learned is that the white man did something really bad and that that is history. That is history. Is that no matter where you go in history, there is a colonizing honk-a-donk who needs to be put on notice. Who needs to be put on notice and it's brutal. It's Brutes Magood.

Brutes Magood. I got a question. And it's brutal. It's Brutes Magoots. Brutes Magoots. I got a question. During World War II, when white people were slaughtering each other by the millions, who do they put on notice? That's a good point.

That's a good question. Who would put on notice when the whites were killing the whites? I mean, if you go back in history, most people that kill most people are of the same, because like humans are just shitty, so you kill whatever's closest. Right. So it's like white people have killed more white people than anything um uh viruses have killed more people than anyone so is mosquitoes yeah the viruses are fucking beyond racist yeah i mean africans throughout history have killed more africans than anyone right all the way through history asians have

killed more asians than anyone uh you know even right now south asians indians and pakistanis they kill each other so it's like who how do you put someone on notice if you're the same fucking race i don't know like when the germanic tribes or the huns were coming in and killing the romans who do you fucking put on notice who was put on notice like who did the historians go you're on fucking notice for what you did and like this is what you need to do yeah i don't know i i wish i had the answer i don't know um oh here's another big story coming up right now did you hear about this they're trying to find out if um if i was just gonna call her the fuhrer kamala harris

kamala harris is actually beautiful even at all i mean she's a beautiful girl she is a piece how old is kamala Harris? She's in her 50s, 60s. Okay, well then I believe she's black because she looks like 30. Do you think people in this part...

Black don't crack, but Greek don't leak, V. Do you think people in this part of 3rd Avenue... Unless the fucking fetus is not sliced thin. Oh, she's 55? Wow.

She's Yanni's age. Wow. That's what it is. I mean, she's a piece. I mean, she's a piece. She's a piece. She she's a piece she's a piece she's also a very tough tough woman yeah she's also put a lot of people in jail that were innocent it's a she put a lot of black men in jail that were fucking 100 innocent she also put a lot of black men in jail for drug crimes which is where i would say a lot of the systemic racism is. I mean, why be specific nowadays and look at studies and facts?

But based on the studies I've seen, there is a lot of systemic racism in drug crimes. Yes. And the discrepancy between black and white. So that's bad. And Kamala Harris, make no mistake, when she was Attorney General in California, And Kamala Harris, make no mistake, when she was attorney general in California, her peoples and her put a lot of black kids in jail for a little marijuana cigarette.

It's just what it is. It's what it is. Yeah. I don't know what Mike Pence is going to say to her at the debate except from his position because he's a fucking Republican. He's just probably going to go, good job. Yeah. I mean, what do you say to her? Yeah. He's a fucking Republican. He's just probably going to go, good job. Yeah, yeah. I mean, what do you say to her? Yeah, he's like- She's basically a Republican.

I know. When they're going to, whatever, debate person is going to be like, the moderator's going to be like, you know, Mr. Pence, what do you have to say to Kamala Harris putting black men in jail for outstanding amounts of years for petty crimes?

She's going to say, congratulations. Give her a high five. Do you want to go see hyenas at a zoo with me? Yeah! It's been a while since you hit one of those yeah's. Yeah! Yeah, look at that piece of shit coffee maker. This is what we're going to...

Can we get a piece of tape and put Venetia's car on that? That's the name of it. Let's do it. What we actually are intending to do, hopefully, when this pandemic ends, is we want to go on the road, do history tours.

I want to go do history tours. Bring Binky. Right. Right. And Venetia. We should bring the babies, too. Bring the babies and go on some sort of quick tours

where we can film us going on history tours. Why are you feeling yourself up? What? I catch you doing it. Are you aware of it? No. Because the fans see it.

I'm on estrogen. Yeah, but why do you keep checking your chest? Because I got to make sure that my nipples are not under my armpit. No, you flex a lot. And why do you do it? I don't know. Because my nipples are under my armpit right now. I'm not in shape.

Neither am I. But listen, yeah, March 19th. Remember that? When we fucking had shows at the Gramercy Theater? Look at our backs. Yeah, look at our backs. I mean, we look, both look blown out in that picture. And we bombed.

Yeah, we bombed and fucking, but yeah. Was it a bad show? We thought it was a bad show. It was dope? The other one, the stand wasn't great. Oh, no, this was the one that Gramercy was a good show, but Mike Suarez bombed. Way, Jong-Jan.

It's a kidding. He's joking. I'm kidding, Mike. We love you. And Mike, by the way, Mike Suarez bombed. Way, John Jan. Just kidding. He's joking. I'm kidding, Mike. We love you. And Mike, by the way, Mike Suarez still, we binky emoji face Mike still will be our opener

when we get back on the road. 100%. Before he gets the email. After he gets the email, I don't know what he's going to be thinking. Yeah, so it's what it is. Yeah, we were running around, jumping around here.

We're just joking. What can you do? I mean, because we, you know. I wish we could get a shot of Benetia in her hats. Yeah. Because she's having fun. Benetia is so fun.

She brings such a good energy to our team. Yeah. Let me just say it's our birthday, but I want to celebrate you guys. We got a great team, finally. And thank you. I'm just joking. No, you got to cackle that out. It's his birthday.

Happy birthday. Yeah, happy birthday. We have to cackle a lot of the put it on the kamikaze yeah um but um but yeah i think that i think that now we have the team locked and loaded we're ready to go um and it's just all up upward from here and i mean look look i mean you know i can't oh yeah i forgot the kid trevor wallace yeah was on the grammar c theater show and he sold out two shows. And it's just, yeah. Trevor Wallace just looks like me if I got coronavirus.

Because look at what we did, though. Yeah. And that was the first time we worked with Binky. That's what it is. There's Zach Isis. Remember Zach Isis? Yeah. Remember Zach?

I mean, we've come a long way. I mean, look at that crowd. It's unbelievable. And I think that I shouldn't have been wearing that sweater. It was too small for me. But who cares? Greek stuff, it doesn't matter. Look how jacked I shouldn't have been wearing that sweater. It was too small for me. But who cares? It doesn't matter. Look how jacked I was, though.

I was working out then. There was gyms open. I was a real strong kid at that moment. Yeah. I mean, I was a kid that, like, if you had a snap and right, you could put me down. But if I got a hold of you, I'm definitely going to bite. It's going to just bite. If I get close, I'll bite.

And I don't know why I decided to wear shoes that night. Yeah. But I wanted to be a grown-up. And my dad was, like, almost dead when this happened. I remember close, I'll bite. I don't know why I decided to wear shoes that night, but I wanted to be a grown-up. My dad was almost dead when this happened. I remember the show was at midnight and I almost passed out because I was too sleepy. That girl comes to every show. I think my dad had just died. Like two days before or he was about to die. My dad died in November. My dad died in November.

This was November 9th. Yeah. So my dad died on November 5th. So my dad died four days before this. Yeah. Oh, wow. Yeah. Yeah.

That's crazy. Got to keep working, man. It's America, you know? Yeah. We got to keep going. So there we go. So yeah. So go to patreon.com slash Bravery's Boys.

Pause it and eat and just get back to it okay let's see it on the birthday episode okay all right yeah let's just pause it so we just ate we took a pause but you didn't see it because of the magic of editing and we always like to give binky a little bit more work or or the other alternative and this is an option too this you might be seeing what's close to it to our episode because we never stopped the camera and you just heard and saw everything we did for the past hour. My child was on camera. We were walking around saying things that are horrible. So you may have seen that.

And then the truth is it doesn't care. Mikey has now pulled up episodes that we've done in the past. I mean, there's no way around saying this. Seen Smith's episode was a snoozer. Why? You just can't get around it. I just see it, and I see if you don't change that to Snoozer Smith. Wei Zhongzhen.

What are some of your favorites? What are some classics we should go tell people to go? No, I'm kidding. Our birthday kind of marks the end of a cycle right like maybe a year what are some classics you think people can go back and listen to classics i'm gonna say charlie rose baby charlie rose is wild i don't even remember that i think yeah that was the baby that um you remember was kidnapped and then ended up they found the guys ended up being they found the guys on Bay Ridge's shore. Oh, yeah.

Yeah, the guys who did it were shipwrecked on Bay Ridge. So baby Charlie Rose is wild, is a goodie. Michael Kosta was a good one. Yeah. Yeah, I'm literally watching. I'm looking at all the thumbnails right now of all the episodes, and I'm being 100% honest with you besides the one with

James Wilkes and the plant based thing I don't remember any of them I actually can't tell you, oh I remember Jeff died because he fucking was a creep Wei Zhongzhen Keep going Oh Moshe Kasher I remember Moshe Kasher we talked, it was a good one, we talked

about the particular cult of Hasidic Jew that he came from, which was the same as the one that was portrayed in that Netflix series. So you should check that out for sure. Do you know the guy who owned 69th Street Markets was a Hasidic Jew? I didn't know that. Yes. Also, we did an episode with the borough president of Brooklyn. Who I think should be the next mayor.

Eric Adams. Eric Adams is a black guy who's a Democrat but trusts the police and wants the police back. I think people will really enjoy that one. It's very interesting. That's a good one. If we go way back, you're going to go way back to the beginning. Let's look at the beginning. Well, the beginning, the beginning.

Yeah. Yeah, let's see like way back to the beginning. Let's look at the beginning. Wow, the beginning, the beginning. Yeah. Yeah, let's see the beginning, the beginning. Of course, Battle of Crete is a very interesting one because it's personal. Battle of Crete might be one of our better episodes. It only has 16,000 views. Yeah, well, that's because we put them up way after we aired them. But the Battle of Crete episode, that is, I think, one of the best episodes we ever did, for sure.

Yeah, I mean, this was way at the beginning. It's one of our first episodes. New York was wild. It was also a good one. It was about the gangs in New York. There's a lot of ones you should go back and enjoy,

which are really good. I think one that might be overlooked a lot is if you want to learn a lot about dogs, we were both there for that episode too dogs are wild is a good one about the history of dogs and and mankind's relationship to dogs and how symbiotic and important it was for both species then there's other videos where i'm just you know taking my blood pressure and rite aid i don't remember miller freemore do you remember miller as well dude not a clint mark twain i don't remember I don't remember Miller-Fremont. Do you remember Miller-Fremont as well? Dude, not a... Mark Twain,

I don't remember. I don't remember anything. First Andrew Schultz, I don't remember that. I don't remember that. Was that the one where you... James Armistead Lafayette, I remember.

I don't remember... Mary Queen of Squats, do you remember that? I don't. I don't remember that. We've, yeah. Cleopatra, I don't remember. Frank Rizzo's a classic.

Frank Rizzo is actually a classic. Yeah, that's a classic. That's a fucking... The Dan Szo is actually a classic. Yeah, that's a classic. That's a fucking good. The Dan Soder, where we talk about the plain Indians, is a classic. Tank Sinatra's a snoozer. Snoozer. Nikki Glaser, this episode was good, but the No Nuts, snoozy, loozy.

Actually, Rachel Feinstein episode is a real sleeper. It was actually really good. Also, Jake Lingle. People love Jake Lingle. I didn't expect that. Look how high Jake Lingle did. Go back up. Jake Lingle crushed it.

I don't even remember Jake Lingle at all. Not a second. I couldn't tell you one thing about Jake Lingle. Was I there for the Jake Lingle episode? You were. That's wild. No, we were both there. We were both there.

I don't remember. Who was Jake Lingle? Jake Lingle was a guy in Chicago, and I don't remember anything beyond that. It's funny. We've done so many episodes at this point, two and a half years, that the history of Yas is a goodie. It's a goodie, yeah. That's a goodie.

The history of The Weeknd is also a goodie. People like those. I mean, those are at 40 already. The first Bill Burr is great. The second one, I mean, pardon my French, it was the snoozer. It was on, that one was quarantine. Bill was in a bad mood, and if that happens.

Yeah, Bill just came out and started beating up Yanni, and then I'm the one that got yelled at after the call. Yeah, I mean, it was just a snoozer. And then we did our Sandra Dee video to celebrate something. That was it. And that was before we did this video a year ago. The Sandra Dee. Oh, right?

When did we do it? This was in November. And we did this in November. It's now August. And I have just got back to my apartment about a month ago. So that's just what it is. Yeah, I mean, you live 10 lifetimes in one year. Zach Isis was made it.

Mike Suarez made it. I mean, this is me. My thighs are wild. Go check out, yeah, Sandra Depos. Can you get tan at all or no?

No. What do you just get red? Just get red. This is what I used to put on fucking SS officer jackets. Yeah. This is when you were going through a wild phase,

but this is, you were really, really free during this. You were, you were a kid. I had active chlamydia during this. Yeah, this is when you were going through a wild phase. But this is, you were really, really free during this. You were a king. I had active chlamydia during this. Yeah, you had chlamydia. You were a free, free spirit during this era. Yeah, it's what it is.

What can you do? I mean, Mike Emojiface was there. Shout out to Mike Suarez. Go follow him on Instagram and watch him on whatever Bobby Kelly's got him doing right now. We hope he's still alive because once he gets that email, he may end it. Look at Venetia participating. Wow, yes. Look at Venetia participating

in the Perea. This is not the type of Christmas party you're going to see this year because we'll be masked up. I mean, what was Venetia thinking to post that picture

in Central Park with our fans? What was Venetia thinking? You've got to put a filter. You've got to put a history of fans filter on that. People were tagging me. That went on Reddit? I know.

Can we get it off Reddit? Did you get it down? How did you get it down? It's not, the rules are that you can't post like your personal lives and stuff. Like if the guys like have a, find a photo of your personal life, you can't post it.

Unfortunately, you're gonna have to understand you're not exactly a private person anymore. Do you ever think back, Venetia, to like the moment you contacted? There's like 100,000 hundred thousand people who know you are so you can't post post photos that or at least privatize your account do you think ever think back to the moment when you're asked sergio chacon to like contact us like do you ever think like why did i ever get involved with these fuckers she loves us though i love you guys she just there was only one person she didn't love yeah look at this episode called interns this one person she didn't love. Yeah.

Look at this episode called Interns. This is when Venetia was an intern. We're just yelling at her. We all look different. No. We all look different. Venetia looks dead ass

the same. Same hair. Die. I mean, she's a Greek. We got black hair and it's just what it is. It is.

And you look exactly the same. There's only one person there that looks a tad bit skinnier. Look it. There's a fat Yanni, and then there's an early history hyena's Yanni. I mean, I'm leaning back. I think you look the same there, though. No, I—

Doesn't he look the same there? I'm still handsome. I'm a fucking handsome kid. That's what it is. But I'm leaning back, so that means That's as fat as I can look And it's not even On my best angle now I don't look

Look how skinny I was looking Look at my arm I'm ripped Yeah I'm fucking ripped Because you look the same Except you were promoting

Your Your Perea's Spin studio Spin studio How's the studio doing The great kids find a way To open a business Spin Forest Hills

Those kids are screwed in. Yeah. Spin Forest Hills. Go check them out on Instagram. Spin FH. They're actually fucking, you know how screwed in they are? They rented their bikes out. They rented their bikes out to people to make money while people could pay a monthly fee.

They brought the bikes to the house. You can have it. And now they put the bikes on the roof and they're doing active spin classes on their roof, which is totally legal. Yeah. Because it's all socially distanced. Guys, patreon.com slash Bay Ridge Boys is our channel. No podcast in the history of, I'm being honest,

we're the number one producer of content. We do daily content on there. Web on the Morning. You can go watch the whole backlog from the first one we did five months ago till now. There's old ladder 14.

I mean, go join our Patreon at patreon.com slash bayridgeboys at whatever tier you can afford and just become a part of that community over there. It's amazing. People interact with each other on the community board. They make us laugh. They make jokes. They make memes. you can afford and just become a part of that community over there it's amazing there's people interact with each other in the community board they make us laugh they make jokes they make memes

it's for your birthdays if you guys want to wish the guys a birthday gift patreon i mean say happy birthday what it's how you support uncensored comedy and go ask other patreon members if they enjoy it and if it's worth it because there there's no Patreon as worth it as ours. Go become a part of our matriarchy. Become a member. It's what it is. What are you guys excited about now for this year and your birthday? I'm excited.

I'm excited. Chrissy's got a great new show that he's going to be hosting. Who knows? So we're going to be taking a little break. We've been working so hard. But don't worry. We're still going to have content recorded for you. So you will still get the podcast, but we're going to take a little vacay.

We've got to take a little vacay. We've got to take a little vacay so Mike can attend to his other 2,500 jobs because he's Jamaican. And Benetia needs to go to work in Greece. She needs to go to fucking Greece. Yeah, she needs to go to – and me and Chrissy just need a little bit of a breather, and that's it. Chrissy's got shows coming up.

I got shows at Distress Factory. This is our second or third birthday on the podcast. This is, I believe, might be our third birthday on the, second birthday. We're a young podcast, cuz. We're a young podcast. I mean, we're young.

I mean, Coco Diaz was doing his podcast. He's been doing his podcast for over 10 years. Yeah. It's what it is. Yeah. We've been only a little over two years, us. Patreon.com slash Bay Ridge Boys. Check out where we're doing, what we're up to.

As always, we read the new members of the matriarchy. We like to read them out and say hello to them. And thank you so much for your support and service. So leading off- And happy birthday to you. Happy birthday to you. Yes, queen. Yes, queen.

Yas. Yas. There we go. Michael Gonzalez, Stephen, Sean Ward. Then we got Stephen Osborne, a.k.a. Beef Queef. Venetia, we're working. Where did Venetia go? Who knows?

Then we got Ian, make a lot of puss, give Yanni some snooze, and give Chrissy a kissy so he doesn't get pissy weese. Okay, those are both almost. Yeah, those are almost. Then we got can't go higher than $10 on my girlfriend. We'll start asking questions. That one belongs on the list, but where's Venetia? Venetia, she's here.

She's listening. Venetia, put the baby on your shoulders and come in here. We need you to keep track of who's going on the list. Venetia is my new here. She's listening. Venetia, put the baby on your shoulders and come in here. We need you to keep track of who's going on the list. Venetia is my new baby's mom. Yes! Then we got S1. Then we got Alex the Greek for Shore Fumes. Milky White Bean Cheeks.

Then we got Melissa. Do you want to just hire Venetia as your baby's mama? We could just start paying her to be your baby's your other baby's mama? Yeah, because we could throw in another $250 a week. Yeah. Should we just make part of her duties and just take care of the baby? I'll throw in $300 extra a week to be my baby's mama.

Okay, keep going. And then we got Milky White Bean Cheeks. Then we got Melissa Make No Mistake, Jacob Tolbert. Then we got Hasidic Private Eye, hired by The Weather Girl to investigate Storms Bruin and Chrissy D's DMs. What? Benatia, where are you? It's what it is. Are you recording?

How do we know who's on the fucking list? Is she okay? Then we got Diego Frangimoni. Yeah. Then we got 12-quarter Eastern Blocker 2 with a pinky-sized skin flute, fully charged and waiting for my Ukrainian father to pass away. On the list. The last four have been on the list.

Yeah. Then we got Sammy C with a little D but still want to give it to Chrissy. There we go. Nice rhyme scheme. You get a Drexler for the rhyme scheme. Then we got uh sammy c with the little d but still want to give it to chrissy there we go nice rhyme scheme you get a drexler for the rhyme scheme uh then we got matthew then we got uh yanni dolmades yanni dolmades is a good solid funny chicken finger that's a drexler what is dolmades dolmades are the little grape reef the food do you like those or no no why not because i just don't like anything from the middle East. Yeah, can we just take a... No, I'm kidding. Can we just take a moment, though, to realize you're from New York, which is a very progressive

town and international. Yeah. But you're a townie. Yeah. Your food habits are... You're a townie. I like burgers and I like fucking pizza. Yeah, that's it.

You don't like anything that's foreign. Yeah, nothing that's foreign. I'm kidding about the grape leaves in the Middle East, of course. We love you, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. Then we got Robin Loesch, Meese. Then we got Chrissy and Bubba's kiss on the lips for all transitions. Sink a jumper and suck my own tits.

That's it. Throw him on the list. Jesus Christ. Then we got James Maloney. Then we got Chrissy D's white thighs blind my blue eyes. Put him on the list. List. Then we got Jared Frey, Dan Souza.

Then we got Jerry Double Wide Dumpy Frey. Then we got Jeremy Tucked It Back. Jeremy Tucked It Back and Flicked My Bean. Chrissy D went too deep, punctured my spleen, and turned my ass to a crime scene. We're going to throw that one on the list. Great rhyme scheme. Yeah.

And originality. Very nice. Then we got Straight to the Back is what Father Bill said to Chrissy when he skull fucked him on the lovesack. S-L-O-K-S. Throw them on the list. This is the highest percentage of people going on the list, and we don't have Venetia, so we have no idea.

It's just what it is. Then we got waiting in the closet for a funeral. Throw him on the list. Then we got red-blooded Western hemi Trump 2020. Then we got Jake. Then we got Chrissy W. with CP needing Chrissy D. to give me PT. Then we got Trey Fistful of Hollers Allen. Then we got Straight Tang, Ross Dietrich.

Wait a second. Straight Tang? Straight Tang. Straight Tang? Tang. Yeah, Drexler. Okay. Ross Dietrich, Justin Patterson, Samuel Salisbury, Chrissy Startling shooting in the dark.

Then we got Fully Charged Snow Monkey. Fully Charged Snow Monkey's a Drexler. Then we got Michelle Garlic's Always On Point, Bon Giovanni. Then we got Bradley Meek. Then we got Jake, make no mistake, I'm an FF Jack kid because Father Bill gave me the holy protein glue.

On the list. Then we got I Only Eat Smash Beans Made by Goya. On the list. And then last but not least, we got Seducing Tim Dillon to Eat My Shitter Like an Apple Fritter. On the list. On the list. And last but not least, we got seducing Tim Dillon to eat my shitter like an apple fritter. On the list. On the list.

Jesus Christ. And that's it, folks. That's it. Wow. Just in time for a birthday to us. Happy birthday

to us. Happy birthday to us. Happy birthday, dear us. And Aunt Giannis. Happy birthday to you. Hold on a second. I'm just going to make a wish, and I'm going to tell you right now, my wish is to get to 5,000 Patreons. Want to blow my candle, baby?

Come on, blow it out. Come on, mama. I can do it? Come on, baby. Wait, hold on. Come on. What's wrong with you, baby? I think you got corona.

There it is. That's why I wasn't sure if we should blow it out. Yeah. What can you do? Yay! That's it. Back to you. Thank you guys so much.

Don't come on camera. She's on camera now. What can you do? Daddy, yes! Yes! Okay, okay. you. Thank you guys so much. Don't come on camera. She's on camera now. What can you do? Yes. You got to get off the camera. We're going to get a cease and desist letter. Yes. Can I have a hug for my birthday? All I want from Santa is a hug

for my birthday and I can't get it. All I want from Santa is a hug for my birthday, and I can't get it. What about the bee? No, put a blur. Put a blur. Put a blur on her face. Cut to me. Cut to me. Cut to me.

And we are live here and legal. Hi. Thank you, baby. I love you. Okay, look. That was one of the best Patreon lists of all time. Of all time. Because of our birthday, you all win this week. That's that's it thank you wish us a happy birthday and please please

please please please if you're on the if you're a member of patreon.com slash bay ridge boys tell the non-toots i how great it how tell all the toots how great it feels to be a fucking non toot i'm sorry i cursed in front of the baby. Happy birthday! We really hope you enjoyed that episode, whatever it was about. This is just a stock thing that we're taping on temporary episode.

So, go, make sure you rate, review us, subscribe, turn on your notifications, get jiggy with it. And go to patreon.com slash bayridgeboys

where things get really wild.