History Hyenas with Chris Distefano and Yannis Pappas - 24 - Millard Filmore was WILD!!!
Episode Date: July 22, 2018Yannis wanders the plains alone one more time searching for Chris and discussing the history of Millard Filmore and how WILD he was!Want more Hyena content? Check out www.patreon.com/bayridgeboys... where things get really WILD!Follow us!: 🙆🏼♂️🐕🙆🏻♂️🙆🏼♂️Chris Distefano on Instagram, Twitter, website🙆🏻♂️Yannis Pappas on Instagram, Twitter, website🐕History Hyenas on Instagram, Twitter, website Subscribe to the poddy woddy on YouTube, iTunes, Spotify, and HH Clips
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What's up? I'm Chris DiStefano, a.k.a. Chrissy D, a.k.a. King Gay.
You're listening to the Bay Ridge Boys, History Hyenas. What's up everybody?
What's up to the matriarchy out there?
Across the country, across the globe. What's up everybody, what's up to the matriarchy out there, across the country, across the globe.
What's up trash monkeys, what's up true blue trances, true blue gazes, and regular old straightsies.
How you guys doing? This is Giannis Pappas, here with Zach Isis, and trash monkey, the Staten Island Hyena is back taking over the mic for our missing
matriarch again Chrissy Cackles, Chrissy Pseudotit, True Blue Trans, the number one highest ranking
female True Blue Trans Hyena Chrissy DiStefano who's in Texas.
Addison, Texas
doing comedy down there.
He's telling jokes
at the Addison Improv
down there in Texas.
So we're missing Chris.
Of course
he could call in, but of course
I just called him and he's not
picking up the phone because he's probably jerking off in his hotel room for an eighth time.
The kid's really got problems.
I mean, he goes on the road.
All he does is text me and just tell me about how he can't do weekends.
He's such a New York kid that he can't be on the road.
His last text to me right now was
he goes
yeah
he goes yeah yeah yeah
there was a lot of yes he told me yeah
and he says yeah he just texts me yeah
all the time yeah
and he goes
it's good
it's good to travel but I'm a Brooklyn
kid and the main goal is to do one-nighters.
The way we get there is the party.
History Hyena Tour.
And we do that.
That's what we got to do.
So yeah, that's mine and Chris's goal.
We want to leave New York as little as possible.
So you make us big in your town or whatever.
We bring Zach.
We go out there.
We do one-nighters, history, hyenas, live podcast.
We'll do a little stand-up, and then we fly right back to the trash burrow that we hide in.
That's what we want to do.
So here's the deal.
Here is the deal.
Hope you enjoyed the last episode.
Homio sapiens, sapiens are wild.
I didn't even know it.
You didn't even know it.
Zach didn't even know it, that we are actually homo sapiens sapiens.
So now that we cleared that shit up, let's move on to this idea that I told Chrissy and I think would be great.
Listen, we're trying to grow this thing.
So far, I got to say, we're doing pretty good, aren't we, Zach?
I think so, yeah.
How are the numbers?
Numbers are rising every day.
Every fucking day, numbers are rising.
All right, this is a movement.
This matriarchy is a movement.
So this is what we wanted to do.
Great shirt, by the way.
Thanks, man.
Bay Ridge Boys shirt right here.
This is the test print, and I just put it up on the Bay Ridge Boys Instagram.
You can see the shirt.
Well, they're going to be for sale soon, as well as a whole bunch of other shirts.
We're going to have plain and simp shirts.
We're going to have maybe a sea captain shirt.
Maybe a coyote shirt.
Definitely a matriarchy, probably pseudo tit.
Who knows?
We're going to get creative.
There's going to be a whole bunch.
But here's the idea.
In order for you guys to help us grow, here's some incentive we thought
of, me and Chrissy.
If you can prove to us
through DMs or
however you want to prove
it, that you have recommended
five people
to listen to the History Hyenas
podcast.
Right? If they DM us or when they add us and they say,
hey, we were recommended by Boom,
we will take note of Boom being your name.
And when you hit five, guess what we're doing, cuzzy?
Guess what we're doing, cuzzy, wuzzy, fuzzy, wuzzy bear?
We are going to send you a free fucking Bay Ridge Boys t-shirt or when we get the other merch,
whatever one you want, right?
We recommend the Bay Ridge Boys because look how dope this fucking shirt is.
That's a dope t-shirt.
Yeah, you probably look.
Can they see it in the camera?
Yeah, they can see that.
There you go.
Yeah.
You see how dope it is?
So we're going to send you a free one of these and also we're going to send you a free signed poster of
me and Chrissy D in swim shorts
and Crocs drinking
smoothies. Signed
by me and Chris.
How? I mean, does it get better than that?
That's tempting. That's pretty good, right?
You want to recommend five people and you're on the podcast.
I've already recommended five
people. So I think we owe you
a signed poster in Crocs and fucking swimsuits.
But I want the picture of you guys from the sports show.
Oh, when we're fat?
The fat ass?
Yeah.
You want that one signed?
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah, they're still playing that show.
You know what's funny is they played that show in New York so much, and they still play it so much.
But me and Chris look like we're wearing fat suits.
So I don't think anyone thinks it's us when we're walking down the street, you know, because this show plays all the time on MSG.
MSG is if you don't live in New York City.
MSG is Madison Square Garden Network.
It's where the Knicks games are on.
It's a New York.
I guess it's New York State probably.
Yeah, it's Time Warner Cable.
I don't know.
It's a local. It's a big local sports channel owned by Madison Square Garden. New York, I guess it's New York State probably. Yeah, it's Time Warner Cable. I don't know.
It's a local, it's a big local sports channel owned by Madison Square Garden.
And me and Chris had a sports show on there in 2013
and they played the shit out of it.
We talked about it on the cast.
We don't get any money.
So yo, recommend it to your fucking friends.
Right, Trash Monkey?
Yeah, that's right.
That's fucking right. I'm in the union. My name is Trash Monkey? Yeah, that's right. That's fucking right.
I'm in the union.
My name is Trash Monkey from Staten Island.
I do good out here.
I got my mother living in the basement and my grandmothers living upstairs.
I made a good life for you, Marie.
My name is Trash Monkey the fucking spotted hyena there.
Thanks, Trash Monkey.
So, recommend it to your friends.
And soon you'll have shirts that you can buy.
And we appreciate it.
And also, again, join our Bay Ridge Boys Instagram.
Join it up.
It's BayRidgeBoys on Instagram.
You click on it.
Boom.
History Hyenas Podcast.
One and the same.
We are one and the same.
There's a podcast.
There's a web series.
New web series episodes coming up very shortly we've been a little bit on hiatus because we've been building
up this podcast which is now up and cooking we are cooking with gas so join up on that join up
on our little uh facebook uh group bay ridge boys Bay Ridge Boys, just fucking search three words, Bay Ridge Boys,
and you will find us on Facebook.
You'll find us on Instagram and become a part of the matriarchy.
Somebody sent me a nice little HHFOD on Instagram,
History Hyena Factor of the Day.
If you want to teach us something, hashtag it HHFOD
and tag Bay Ridge Boys on Instagram.
Or you can always DM us.
It's not that hard to reach us.
But hashtag it HHFOD.
Someone sent me hyena clans are called cackles.
That's what the clan is called?
Yeah, look that up.
Double check.
Because, you know, I don't know if these fucking people, these fans sometimes are tricking us.
But it's actually called a cackle.
A cackle of hyena.
When there's a lot of hyenas, it's called a cackle of hyenas.
They're called a pack.
They're sometimes called a pack or a clan.
All right.
But how about when there's a lot of them?
A lot of hyenas called a
cackle. Let's see.
This always takes long because
Zach types with two fingers. I mean
you're not. A group of
hyenas referred to as a cackle.
How fucking wild is that?
Yo!
That rolls off the
tongue. A cackle of hyenas. That's extremely fitting. A cackle of hyenas.
That's extremely fitting.
A cackle of hyenas.
Yeah.
How many makes it...
When does it go from a pack or a clan to a cackle?
How many hyenas constitutes a cackle of hyenas?
Let's see.
I think it's like subjective
it is right
how fitting is that with hyenas too
just chaos
you can call them a clan
you can call them a pack
you can call them a cackle
I'll tell you what
if you see three or more of them
you're in fucking trouble
look at that guy
the spotted hyenas by the, are the more brutal ones.
They're kind of the wild ones.
Then there's those other ones.
They look like punk rockers.
I'm not really as interested.
We're not really as interested in that other hyena type.
The spotted hyena is where it's at.
That's where all the fucking murder happens.
That's where all the chewing of the ears happens. they chew each other's fucking ears up so we had a wild week um we had a we crossed
our signals um during the week about getting into the studio we were supposed to all be together. Chrissy was in town this week.
I was in town. He was in town.
And we were supposed to record this week, but the studio was booked
the time we booked it. It was a whole
mess, and guess what happened?
It was the episode
where Nora Cupcakes
shot out to
Nora Cupcakes.
Let me make sure that's exactly what the name is.
It's Nora for sure.
And when I posted it on our Instagram,
the cake they made,
I got a couple of DMs.
Yeah, Nora Cupcake Company, to be exact,
on Main Street in Middletown, Connecticut.
Wow. And I'll add a picture so they can see the cakedletown, Connecticut. Wow.
And I'll add a picture so they can see the cake because it was really awesome.
Yeah.
Can you do that?
Yeah, yeah.
There'll be a picture right there so they can see the cake.
We got to put it on the Patreon too because those people.
I put it on the Instagram and I put it in the Facebook group, the Bay Ridge Boys Facebook group, but our two lovely ladies from Nora Cupcake Company
fucking drove down from Connecticut.
I mean, that's a good two, two and a half hour drive.
They brought us, look at that thing.
They brought us, finally, the History Hyena pseudo cake.
I didn't think it was possible.
I didn't think it was going to ever happen.
Chris is wild.
He made that suggestion.
That's a suggestion only someone who has one normal tit
would ask. Can someone
out there bake us a cake?
I was curious what it was going to look like.
These ladies from
Nora Cupcake Company
Nora
Cupcake Company decided not to do the pseudo penis, but they did an actual.
It's like a wedding cake.
Doesn't it look like a wedding cake?
Yeah.
It's way over the top.
More than I thought would happen if someone actually made it.
Yeah.
It is detailed as fuck.
So we'll post a picture if you haven't seen it.
And I've used both of those pictures on the bottom there as the picture
on the computer screen
those two hyena pictures
so what they did was
on the bottom, what do they call that
the cooking sheet or whatever
in sugar writing red matriarchy
then they got dripping blood
coming down and then
a whole sugar poster
of our logo with me and chris's faces superimposed
on those hyenas and their creative interpretation they have two pseudo penises wrapped around the
bottom layer and the top layer of the cake and one pseudo penises for ch Chris's penis. We're both true blue transes.
We're both matriarchs, high-ranking matriarchs.
So they gave me and Chris a pseudo penis each.
So there are two pseudo penises on that cake
and then there's hyena ears on the top of the cake.
How did the penis taste?
We didn't taste the cake.
We tasted the ears.
So we made a video. I think Chris posted it on his
Instagram where me and Chris actually
at the same time chewed the ears
the way that hyenas usually haze each other.
We just went in at the same
time and chewed the ears. The ears, I'll be
honest with you, were 100%
straight fucking sugar.
I mean, I could not feel
my foot for three days after fucking chewing that.
And they brought us cupcakes because they're famous for the cupcakes,
and the cupcakes were delicious.
So check out the cake.
Here's the detail, though.
Look at the blood dripping down.
And then on the top there, you can't tell, that's gnats.
They did a whole bunch of gnats because when hyenas are in the wild,
there's a whole bunch of flies that fly around their dirty heads.
And the inside of the cake, when you open it,
looks like the entrails that they like to eat.
So they went all out.
They put a lot of work into this cake.
I mean, oh, my God.
Did they put a lot of work into this cake?
They put a lot of work into driving it down.
They're huge fans of the podcast.
We appreciate it.
They found out about
us through the
Guys We Fuck podcast when
Chris was a guest on it.
So they became a fan
of us. Shout out to
Guys We Fuck podcast.
Those girls are doing their thing thing.
So thank you Guys We Fuck podcast. Those girls are doing their thing thing. And so thank you, Guys We Fuck Podcast, for hooking us up with your fans, Nora Cupcake Company.
And they drove all the way down and fucking we weren't even doing a podcast.
That's how wild we are.
We deserve to all get driven up to Poughkeepsie to be fucking put down.
There's a reason why we're pieces of garbage and we're trash monkeys bad.
Because these girls
came all the way down.
We knew they were coming down
and we had the time wrong.
Probably mostly your fault, no?
Whose fault was it?
Yeah, it just got
overbooked in the studio.
Some people had to go longer.
There was a random show
because they were also
shooting downstairs.
So there's a show
that's down there
that had to move up here.
It all got fucked up.
Yeah, they were shooting Crashing here on HBO at the time.
It was a real mess.
Probably the worst day that they could have came down.
But Chris made the arrangements or was talking to them.
And they told them they were going to drive.
So we apologize.
They couldn't have been two nicer young ladies.
Fucking love you guys.
Thank you a samash.
Samash.
And we're going to invite them back down.
And they said, they were totally understanding.
We made videos with the cake.
And then they were like, you know what?
And I was apologizing over and over and over again.
The cake, by the way, is still in the freezer downstairs.
So we may be able to take a bite of it next week.
It's not going to taste good.
It won't be fresh because
I think it's in like a beer freezer.
The cake is fucked.
But they said they will
come back down again another
time and bring us another cake.
Another hyena cake?
Another hyena cake so that we'll all
sit down and be able to enjoy.
So, wow. I can't believe
it happened. I don't know what Chris
is going to request next.
He said he's got something ready.
Yeah, he's going to next request
is going to be like, we want a helicopter
built from scratch
using all
the same anatomical
engineering of hyenas.
We should make it a whole episode,
like the decision back when LeBron first
moved. We should make it a whole episode, the request.
Of what his new request is.
I like that.
Chris's new request. We'll do a whole thing
and see what it is. This took a
couple months.
But a lot. Let's see if it speeds up. A lot shorter.
I mean, how long?
I mean, he started asking for that cake only a couple episodes in.
What are we up to, 23 now?
This is 24.
This is episode 24.
So he probably started asking.
So it did take a while.
I mean, he probably started asking for it somewhere around like the third episode.
Yeah, like episode two.
Yeah.
So, I mean, it was a while.
We're talking about maybe five months or something.
But he finally got the matriarch cake.
And they also brought us fucking 12 cupcakes.
Wow.
So, you know, none of that stuff got eaten.
Me and Chris had a cupcake each.
Unfortunately, next time you know what we'll do?
We'll make sure to have them come down during the You Know What Dude podcast.
Because, yeah, so Bobby can take down.
Those cupcakes won't go to waste.
Well, he might not eat them in here.
Yeah, he'll be like, you know what?
Yeah, I'm on a diet, dude.
But then, yeah, he'll eat them in the car.
Yeah, in the dark.
He'll binge like 10 of those cupcakes.
So thank you again, Nord Cupcake. I can't believe it happened. he'll binge like 10 of those cupcakes, so,
thank you again,
Nora Cupcake,
I can't believe it happened,
and we hope to have you back down,
again,
soon,
so,
we got a lot of,
nice fun,
animal videos for you,
we got a nice topic for you,
we're switching gears,
me and Chrissy,
we're gonna do it this week,
hopefully he'll call in, probably not, cause you know, what's more and Chrissy, we're going to do it this week. Hopefully he'll call in. Probably not because what's more important
than his own podcast
that he just even texted me and said
he wanted to get it so big so we could tour with.
Him and Sergio are probably fucking boxing.
He's got Sergio Chacon with him.
Our good friend, funny comic, who's opening for him.
And they go
work out a lot.
I like to sit in the hotel room and just watch SportsCenter over and over again
when I'm on the road.
Chris likes to go out and see the city,
but he's in Addison, Texas.
What the fuck is there to see in Addison, Texas?
I've never been to Texas, though.
I want to go to Texas
because I just want to see what it looks like
when people are just open carrying on the street.
I just want to sit down that like um
a wendy's or a cracker barrel and just look across and see a dude with a gun on his belt
like a beeper in 1999 just on his fucking belt be like oh that's that's scary. Something bad. If a fight breaks out here, somebody's getting shot.
But anyway, we've been talking this week a lot about Donald Trump.
Look, being from New York, Donald Trump being president, it's like, you know what it reminds me of?
Christian Finnegan, this comedian, has a funny joke.
He's not from New York, but he's been here a long time.
And Donald Trump is kind of like a fixture in New York.
He's kind of like a caricature of what a rich person is.
And he's just been sort of a gossip column.
He's been fodder for like gossip columns and, you know, page six news forever.
You know, he's just kind of like a fucking celebrity before The Apprentice.
Like he would never have been elected president if it wasn't for The Apprentice.
Like the rest of the world kind kinda knew who Donald Trump was, but that's who really, you know,
The Apprentice is really what
put him on the map
with middle America and nationally.
That was a hit show.
So you gotta thank
Mark, what is it,
Mark Burnett? Is that his name? Mark Burnett.
Yeah, Mark Burnett,
who's the producer of that show.
Jesus, what a psychopath Mark Burnett is.
He's got to be a psychopath.
Kid was a nanny.
He started as a nanny in Los Angeles and somehow worked his way up to be one of the most powerful people in Hollywood
with the most fucking stupid fucking reality shows.
Can you imagine?
Only a psychopath would walk in to a producer's office.
His first big hit, Survivor, Mark Burnett.
Imagine going in and pitching that.
Be like, all right, listen.
This is what was going on in his brain.
He's like, you know what would be great?
If we put a bunch of people on an island.
No food.
Scarce resources.
And see which ones die. What do you you guys think and we'll film it and the ones who are about to die they lose and the one person who survives is our survivor what
do you think let's see if people can almost die for your i mean, that show is this close to The Hunger Games. And that was a long
time ago when it premiered.
So he's the mind behind
that. He's the mind behind
The Apprentice. Can you look? What else did Mark
Burnett do? Because he's fucking really
the one responsible
for Donald
Trump's presidency.
Trump!
Mark Burnett. I think it's B-U-r-r yeah mark burnett boom the apprentice there he is
looking at look at it you can tell yeah look at that fucking cold eyes he's got that look
yeah look at his eyes look at him in that that picture especially that kid has no empathy none
he is not an empath he's not a neurotypical as they call him so he did the survivor he did
the apprentice um are you smarter than a fifth grader are you smarter than a friend oh shark
tank fuck this guy's good the voice he's got his hand in like everything yeah jesus and he started
as a fucking nanny he's from england and he moved to la wow um oh he does other shit too
so my dad is better than your dad was another one of his hit shows is that a hit too yeah
guy's a psychopath let's look at his history how he how he started because it's so funny
in 2004 he's at most, fuck,
he was one of the most influential people in the world,
time called him.
Yeah, he's a powerful dude.
He's a powerful.
Also named philanthropist of the year.
Yeah, they do that for the tax breaks.
You know, you got that much money,
you get fucking sweet tax breaks.
Get the IRS to look the other way
while you're hiding all your money in Cancun.
I'm sorry.
Well, not Cancun,uba whatever fucking saint martin whatever
island tax haven whatever the latest one is but in 1982 mark burnett emigrated to the united states
um with his friend uh nick hill um oh nick hill had already come there a little earlier and was working as a nanny and a chauffeur.
Wow.
So his buddy got him a job as a nanny in Beverly Hills.
This is all.
This is fucking premeditated psychopath.
He was also in the army before all that.
Yeah, he was a stone cold killer.
Similar to the Joker.
Yeah, and he saw action in the Falkland War and Northern Ireland.
This guy's killed.
Yeah, he's a wild dude.
He's a wild dude, Mark Burnett.
He was enlisted in the British Army, and he was a section commander in the Parachute Regiment.
From 78 to 82, he served.
So he came right after murder. He served from 78 to 82 he served so he came right after murder he served from 78 to 82
saw action in the Falklands war and Northern Ireland then was like you know what I want to
go be a nanny who hired this fucking killer as a nanny and to watch their children. Watch their children. This guy just probably saw major combat.
So his buddy got him a job,
even though he had no experience.
And he was a soldier about three days before this.
Oh, so this person really liked having the nanny and security because he was a tough guy.
So whoever hired him liked that he could watch their kid and also maybe kill it, you know, if he had a war flashback.
So he liked the fact that whichever family hired him, it was a family in Malibu.
They don't say who.
He was taking care of two boys for $2.50 a week.
Wow, not a lot of money.
And he was eventually given a position in the insurance office
owned by the father of the two boys.
So he fucking charmed.
You know, usually the nanny fucks the father.
This nanny got a promotion and started working for the father.
And then two years later, he rented a portion of a fence at Venice Beach and sold T-shirts.
This kid's a hustler.
For 18 bucks each.
Yeah.
He hustled.
Realizing he made more money selling T-shirts, he left that job.
And then in 91, he and four others joined a French adventure competition.
So they were on some show.
They were either on it or they produced it, but that is like the original Amazing Race.
That was like the first adventure competition type of show.
And it was French in France.
Was it in France?
Yeah.
Yeah.
Then afterwards, that's when he saw an opportunity
in doing something like that.
He purchased the format rights and bought a similar competition,
Echo Challenge, to America.
And he launched Burnett's career as a television producer.
How, though?
I mean, how the fuck does that happen?
I was wondering. They leave out
the middle ground kind of.
I mean his fun must come from some fucking
crazy rich family or something. Like where
do you just get those connections?
T-shirt money? Yeah.
Would you make enough money making T-shirts
that you were able to buy the rights to a fucking
successful TV show and air
it in New York? I mean, how did that happen?
Who are you fucking?
Who are you blowing?
Who are your parents?
That doesn't just fall out of the sky.
So how did that happen?
And then he went on to make Survivor and The Apprentice.
So it's really Mark Burnett is really the reason because, I mean, nobody would really
know who Donald Trump was, really.
I mean, you know, he's, and like I said, Christian Finnegan, he's a very funny comedian in New York.
He had a joke about Trump that I thought was very funny because he's been living in New York for a long time, even though he's not from New York.
And he said, Donald Trump is like, it's like as if the naked cowboy became president.
You know the naked cowboy?
Yeah. Yeah. So it's like, he's kind of like the naked cowboy became president. You know the naked cowboy? Yeah.
Yeah.
So it's like, he's kind of like the naked cowboy. He's like, he's just always been around in like gossip columns.
And like, he's this cool kind of kitschy, like, oh, billionaire.
It's like fucking Donald Trump sitting in his gold throne up there.
And he's, you know, so it's a wild thing that Donald Trump became president.
And pretty much unprecedented.
I mean, you know, I don't know if there's ever been a reality TV star.
Because that's what he really is.
He's a reality TV star.
He's more that than he is like a real true billionaire.
You know, he doesn't own most of the properties that his name is on
he licenses his name out more like a more like an athlete you know it's like michael jordan's
steakhouse when you go to a trump hotel it's because he's a celebrity he made himself into
a celebrity the thing that he was really good at is being sort of a a personality he's kind of like
a wrestler in real life.
He's kind of got the personality.
He's got the charisma.
He's got the charisma of like a wrestler.
Can you imagine if Ric Flair was president of the United States?
It would probably be a lot similar to what it is now.
I don't see how it would be different.
He'd be going like, you know.
Just cutting promos and yelling woo.
Exactly, yeah.
I mean, Donald Trump,
basically every time he talks,
he's cutting a fucking promo.
Yeah.
I mean, the last tweet,
if you go through his tweets,
they're like fucking wrestling promos.
His last one where he was,
yeah, can you pull up Donald Trump's tweets?
Last one, his last tweet,
but yeah, inconceivable.
It's inconceivable that the government would break into a lawyer's office early in the morning.
Almost unheard of.
Even more inconceivable that a lawyer would tape a client totally unheard of and perhaps illegal.
The good news is that your favorite president did nothing.
That's right, brother. illegal. The good news is that your favorite president did nothing. Woo!
That's right, brother.
Yeah, I want to do it in a in a, uh, yeah, macho
savage. Inconceivable
that the government would break
into a lawyer's office early
in the morning, almost
unheard of. Even more
inconceivable that a lawyer would type
a client totally unheard
of and perhaps illegal.
The good news
is that your favorite president
did nothing wrong. Macho
man Donald Trump.
That was a pretty damn good. You practiced that.
That was a good macho man. I used to do a good macho
man impersonation. Haven't done it in a while.
But that's what it is. I mean, look at him.
All these are promos.
The NFL national debate is alive and well again.
But believe it, he has exclamation.
He's the fucking president of the United States tweeting with exclamation points.
I like that the exclamation points is what threw you over the edge.
Yeah, I can't believe it.
Isn't it in contract that players must stand to detention?
Hand on heart. The $40 in contract that players must stand to detention? Hand on heart.
The $40 million commissioner must take a stand.
First time kneeling out for a game.
Second time kneeling out for a season.
No pay.
Oof.
So he's fucking wild.
Never before in the history of this country i don't know if we've ever had a president who had zero public service experience can you look that up i don't think i think that's the unprecedented
thing about it an actual president head of the executive branch commander in chief with zero
Commander in Chief with zero public service experience.
I'm talking never been at least on some city council or state senator or something.
Five presidents have never been elected to public office before becoming president.
Okay, so I was wrong. Oh, this is political experience.
That's what I meant.
That's what I meant.
You know, public service, you know, public office.
So there have been four others.
There's been four others.
And this is a great segue because the four other presidents besides Donald Trump who never were elected to public office before they became president.
before they became president is Zachary Taylor, Ulysses Grant,
Herbert Hoover, Dwight Eisenhower, and then the fifth is, of course,
Donald J. Remp.
Great segue because Zachary Taylor, fucking war hero, right?
12th president of the United States.
Got into office.
Picked his vice president.
His vice president is who we're talking about today.
Millard Fillmore.
Millard Fillmore was his vice president.
And part of the Whig Party.
One of the leaders of the Whig Party at the time.
And Zachary Taylor fucking died immediately.
I think he was poisoned.
I don't know if he was poisoned, but he died from some bad,
some bacteria from some food.
So I was wondering,
did anyone ever think he was poisoned?
Died from some stomach flu, right?
Yeah.
Is there any conspiracies that he was poisoned?
12th President of the United States,
Zachary Taylor.
Old, rough, and ready is what they called him
because he was a general.
Back then, if you were a fucking general,
dude, you were going to win.
I mean, back then, being a war hero, Zachary Taylor did not die of anything.
So nobody thinks he died.
It looks like there's a few people who are saying some stuff,
but it's kind of a consensus that it was stomach flu.
I would be surprised.
Can you imagine that you could just die from a stomach flu back then?
Brutes, my goods.
Brutes, my goods. Nowadays, you got stomach flu back then brutes my goods brutes my goods nowadays you
got a stomach flu you're like yeah all right let me uh take a little antibiotics or uh a little
soup and knock that out throw on netflix and just ride it out i got a little stomach flu back then
you fucking died from a stomach flu so he only lasted what a couple months how long was he how
long was he in office he was only in office for like a couple months and his vice president um who was a real political choice in the sense that
um zachary taylor was a southern guy yeah he only lasted a fucking from march 4th 1849
to july 9th 18 So, not even a year.
Not even a fucking year.
And so, Zachary Taylor was a real Southern motherfucker
from Virginia.
And back then,
there was a lot of
anti-slavery
people.
That was a big sentiment back then.
You know? In the North.
And that was, you know, that represented a large sentiment back then you know in the north and that was a you know that represented
a large part of the vote so they zach taylor um chose uh millard film war to be his vice president
to kind of shore up that sort of northern vote even though millard fillmore was like kind of he was kind of like against slavery
but not really and that's why we bring up millard fillmore because a lot of people think that
millard fillmore is really the best example of a president that you could compare Donald Trump to. Donald Trump and a lot of other people
like to say it's more Andrew Jackson.
But the people who think it's Millard Fillmore
that you can compare Donald Trump to
point out that Andrew Jackson and Donald Trump
have very little in common, actually,
besides the, I mean, I don't know, expelling of people.
But Andrew Jackson was a huge war hero.
Talk about war hero. Probably the biggest one of all of them, Ulysses Grant, and then maybe Andrew Jackson and Zachary Taylor.
Those are probably the three biggest war heroes our country's ever had.
That's why they became president.
Oh, I forgot about George W. and George Washington.
He's the biggest.
Well, Ulysses Grant, you know, he's an interesting story
because he was just like a fucking drunk failure in life,
and then he found his purpose in the Civil War.
Ulysses Grant.
We'll do an episode on fucking Grant.
But right now, Millard Fillmore.
So Millard Fillmore is an interesting dude from fucking Buffalo, New York.
And the reason why they compare him so much to Donald Trump is because he was a conspiracy guy.
He got elected.
He didn't get elected.
He fell into being the president because Zachary Taylor died,
but he rose to popularity through all these conspiracies.
He was like an anti-Freemason, anti-Catholic.
After his presidency, which was a complete fucking failure in a lot of ways.
He went and joined another party at that time called the Know Nothing Party.
It was a real nativist party that was really anti-Catholic.
So back then you can kind of compare the sentiment,
sort of the anti-immigrant sentiment to sort of the anti-Catholic sentiment back then.
And so he capitalized on that fervor in a lot of ways, the same way Donald Trump capitalizes
on the anti-immigrant fervor.
He was capitalizing on the anti-Catholic fervor, the anti-Freemasons fervor for some reason.
And he really split the party.
He was the last presidential candidate
or last president, I believe, to be a Whig.
The Whig party was done after him
because he split it so much.
And the reason he split it
is because the Whig Party eventually became the Republican Party.
So the Whigs were really against slavery.
But this motherfucker, since he was capitalizing so much on that sort of sympathy for the South and kind of, you know, the darker angels of our nature in America,
the anti-Catholic fervor, which was huge back then.
Catholics used to be the old N-words, you know, in America.
The N-word, it's just so stupid.
Everyone knows the word I'm saying, you know.
I'm basically saying it without saying it.
You know what I'm talking about.
But in America, Catholics used to be looked at
like that as well
they were really
persecuted in a lot of ways
and people hated them but they rose to power
quick they were you know
they were savvy especially in New York City
you know
they got political power
and then you know they became cops for some reason.
That's just what they wanted, become caps.
So Miller Fillmore, the way he really split that Whig party was he freaking,
into law sort of a new amended, more vicious, more severe, more strict Fugitive Slave Act.
This was around, what, 1850 or something, the second Fugitive Slave Act.
And the original Fugitive Slave Act was like 1793 or something.
I mean, you know, this is the History Hyenas podcast.
I'm not exactly accurate, but 1850, I fucking nailed it.
Fugitive Slave Act was passed, and he really pressured everyone, the Whigs in Congress. He really pressured them to go along along with this and this is what really split the
party and so this really is the kind of coup de grace for the wig party because they were so
fucking split over slavery you know and um a lot of wigs supported this and that split them and it
was the fugitive slave act and what made it what made it brutal was that there was actually bounty hunters now.
There was actually slave hunters who would go.
And what made this law different is if you were caught aiding and abetting a fugitive slave,
you could get prosecuted.
It became a federal crime.
Can you look up the details of that?
Just the details of the new slave.
This is sort of like the reform new slavery, the Fugitive Slave Act of 1850.
Yeah, the first slave act was 1793.
And this was sort of like a stricter, more amended, you know,
amended with a whole bunch of um yeah it required that
all escaped slaves upon capture be returned to their masters and that officials and citizens
of free states had to cooperate so abolitionists nicknamed it uh some some blood the bloodhound law
because um the dogs and the bounty hunters um the bounty hunters had dogs that were searching
for slaves now the problem with this is a lot of fucking free slaves were just taken they weren't
there was no habeas corpus for this there was no due process you know there was just these rogue
bounty hunters running around just capturing black people and fucking putting them on the market in
the south it was brutal and um you know there was
there was supposed to be these federal protocols you're supposed to supply uh uh an affidavit to
a federal marshal to capture and but nobody was doing it and um so what happened was, I think, Buffalo, New York, is where Willard Fillmore was from.
He was a beloved son, rose from poverty out of there, was a state representative in New York and Buffalo. But Buffalo was a huge fucking conduit
for escaped slaves
to make it to Ontario, I think.
They would go across the river
and escape to Canada.
And so this really kind of tore his support
apart too.
And there was a lot of people who were against him because,
because of this.
So this was the big,
this is what he's remembered for really.
And this is what fucking split the wig party.
And then after that,
um,
he joined this nativist party,
this fucking crazy,
they were called the Know Nothings.
And he ran for president again under that party, but he was never heard from again.
That was it for him.
But that was it for him.
But that he capitalized on a lot of fears, anti-Catholic.
And he was sort of like wishy-washy on slavery.
You know, he would say, sort of the same way Donald Trump was sort of like,
he was a Democrat, then he was a Republican.
He's all over the fucking place, Donald Trump.
And another huge comparison is as soon as he got into office,
he fucking fired, you know.
I mean, it's like,
there's a transition happening.
You want to keep those people on for a second?
You know, Zachary Taylor dies.
Vice President becomes President.
As soon as he became President, he fired Zachary Taylor's entire cabinet.
You're fired.
He fired the whole fucking cabinet.
And it took like months to get,
it was a real mistake
and he did it because uh he had some fucking vendetta with them from when he was vice president
so he had supposedly that sort of same kind of narcissistic personality was firing people he
didn't like just like donald trump was capitalizing on sort of conspiracy theories, anti-Freemason conspiracy theories and anti-immigrant and anti-Catholic specifically fervor.
Just like kind of Donald Trump has kind of capitalized on.
There's no question he has.
I mean, there's no question that that is there already in people.
And Donald Trump's kind of winking at him.
You know, he's not saying, and that's what Millard Fillmore would do.
He wouldn't say he was for slavery, but he would kind of fucking wink.
That like, hey, I support you guys.
I'm kind of, I'm not really going to do anything.
support you guys. I'm not really going to do anything.
And
one of the big things was
the expansion
West
was happening. And it was
the Missouri
Compromise. Can you pull up
the Missouri Compromise? The Missouri Compromise
was, the whole
purpose of it
was to limit
the spread
of
the peculiar institution
of slavery
in 1820.
So this was a long-standing
law
that prohibited slavery
in the new Louisiana
territory. Louisiana
territory.
And the Missouri Compromise
was repealed by
the Kansas-Nebraska Act
in 1854.
Now, who the fuck
was that? Was that Millard Fillmore?
Because I know, yeah, I think that was Fillmore, right?
That made the Kansas-Nebraska Act?
That repealed the Missouri Compromise and allowed slavery to spread.
That was Millard Fillmore.
So he did that shit, too.
that was Miller Fillmore.
So he did that shit too, even as a wig,
which was,
who repealed the Missouri Compromise?
Who did it?
Yeah.
Well, it was 1854. It was 1854.
The Compromise, 18...
So when did he leave office, this motherfucker?
He got in there... 1854. Yeah, when did he leave office, this motherfucker? He got in there.
1854.
Yeah, I think it was him, dog.
I think it was this fucking guy.
Let me take my glasses off.
I'm pretty sure.
So, that's what he did.
Yeah, I mean, you know, he joined the Whig Party, and he presented himself as, like, a loyal Whig,
just like Donald Trump joined the Republican Party, and, you know, presented himself as a Republican.
I can't find who repealed it, but it is, oh, effectively repealed by Stephen A. Douglas' Kansas-Nebraska Act.
So that's the dude who made the Kansas-Nebraska act. And I think
it was just a choice in
Congress or something, and that's what sparked
the return of
Abe Lincoln. That's right.
Then Lincoln and fucking Stephen
Douglas had some debates. They both
ran for, you know,
they were both in Congress and they ran against each
other, and Lincoln won, man. How different would
it be if Stephen Douglas won?
I mean, you know, shit.
Who knows what would happen?
So that's what Fillmore did.
He joined.
He presented himself as a loyal Whig, sort of like Donald Trump presents himself as a Republican.
But, you know, he's all over the place.
You know, I mean, when you look back at his career, Phil Moore, it started with this sort of bizarre hostility against the Freemasons. And he just was focused on them, you know, sort of like a conspiracy theory, how they were like, you know, making decisions behind in a dark room or behind a dark curtain about the country.
He was all into conspiracy theories, ethnic hatred, and anti-Catholic fervor.
And he served four terms in the House of Representatives.
So that's where he differs from Donald Trump.
He differs from Donald Trump in that he did serve in public office,
serve in public office and he
energetically supported
higher tariffs
that was one thing that he wanted
so that's kind of similar to Donald Trump
with his fucking tariff war
he's like alright
you gonna tax us?
we gonna fucking tax you
so
that's another thing
yeah can tax you so um that's another thing um yeah and so he the thing of the slavery thing is interesting because he he pretended to kind of really be opposed to it but he kind of shunned
abolitionists too um so he was really the person that was kind of stretching what the Whig Party believed. Because the Whig Party was against it.
You think by any chance that Trump
studied Fillmore?
Maybe. I don't know.
Trump talks about Andrew Jackson
all the time.
Andrew Jackson, he did a lot of good things
besides the fucking...
I mean, at the time. He was a slaveholder,
all that shit. You judge him that way from history but andrew jackson i think is viewed by most
historians as a successful president for a lot of the things he did the one horrible thing that he
did of course was um you know made native americans march to those little you know kind of
Americans marched to those little, you know, kind of circumscribed Indian areas that are now called reservations and fucking stole their land and a lot of-
A trail of tears, march of tears, something like that, right?
Yeah.
Was that Jackson?
Can you look that shit up?
Yeah.
I mean, I don't know if that was specifically during Jackson, but I think it could be.
I mean, he made them do it.
You know? could be i mean he made him do it you know so when he when philmore was on the ticket with um with taylor he would like i said he was seen as a real ticket bouncer because he was going to get
that sort of northern vote he had that appeal um but because he wasn't anti-slavery he would
ride the line a little bit
he would still appeal
to those southerners who needed reassurance
I mean this was the zeitgeist
that was really the big issue at the time
was the spread of slavery
and so yeah
the stomach virus is called cholera
by the way cholera?
cholera yeah
yeah so what happened with the compromise here The stomach virus is called cholera, by the way. Cholera? Cholera. Cholera, yeah.
Yeah.
So what happened with the compromise here?
This is what happened.
This is what fucking happened.
Henry Clay in Congress proposed a series of bills that came to be called the Compromise of 1850. But it was a lopsidedly pro-slavery package.
And Taylor refused it.
So Zachary Taylor refused to support it, even though he was from Virginia.
So, you know, the anti-slavery was gaining a lot of power.
You can tell in the 80s, that's interesting to know,
that there was a lot of people who were against it,
and they were just trying to keep this union together.
They were trying to appease the Southerner South.
You know, when you're running for political office, you're trying to appease the southerner south you know when you're running for political office you're trying to appease the southerners uh appease their fears uh and you also
want to appease this sort of anti-slavery sentiment and a lot of uh the anti-slavery
sentiment was economic based as well so it wasn't just moral um but when taylor died um the pro-slavery forces found themselves a nice
unlikely ally although wink wink they knew he was a likely ally i think he fucking had him killed
i'm telling you that right now i think millard fillmore had zachary taylor killed because look
at what he did when he got in office a A fucking northern wig from an abolitionist state in New York in 18-fucking-
He was willing to open the Southwest to slavery.
So it was him.
It was Millard Fillmore.
Before the Kansas-Nebraska Act, the Compromise of 1850, passed by Congress and, of course, signed by Fillmore,
passed by Congress and, of course, signed by Fillmore, undid the 30-year-old Missouri Compromise,
which held slavery in its place and didn't allow it to expand.
So that predated the fucking Adams.
What's his name?
No, Stephen Douglas.
What's the fucking name?
Stephen Douglas.
Stephen Douglas.
Stephen Adams.
I mean, it's always a Douglas or an Adams when you look back in history.
So that's what happened.
That's what happened.
On that same note, it was actually Andrew Jackson and Martin Van Buren.
Trail of Tears?
Yeah.
And that was Andrew Jackson's first priority when he took office. Yeah, he wanted to really, yeah.
And he's a multiple war hero, right?
I mean, he beat the British at one.
I think he's responsible for beating the Seminoles and annexing Florida.
He killed a lot of fucking Indians, that guy, which is what's brutal.
But he also, I mean, he's a complicated guy, Andrew Jackson,
because he had a lot of successes as well.
So we won't know.
And Miller Fillmore is fucking forgotten.
He's considered one of the most useless presidents in history, one of the biggest failures.
So we won't know until Donald Trump is either, I don't know, you know, out of office or impeached or whatever the fuck's going to happen, which one he'll be more compared to.
But, yeah, he annexed Florida.
I know that, right?
Andrew Jackson's Seminole War.
So he was a...
And then New Orleans.
I mean, he...
I think New Orleans was a big battle for him.
I think he won that from the British.
Just do Andrew Jackson fucking wars.
Which ones he fought.
So he was a big war hero.
And so that's why the people who argue that Millard Fillmore is the one you can compare Donald Trump to more.
Is because Donald Trump is not a fucking war hero.
And Millard Fillmore was not a war hero.
Millard Fillmore was more of a divisive personality which is what these people
who make that comparison
between Fillmore and Trump
consider Trump to be
more of a divisive.
So what do you get?
Battle of Taga?
Creek War.
Battle of Talladega.
The big one
where he became
a real big hero
was the War of 1812.
He got a lot of rings.
Battle of New Orleans.
The Seminole Wars.
Yeah, that's when they annexed,
that's when they made Florida
part of the United States.
They stole it from the Spanish.
The big one was the War of 1812
where he was like a big reason
why the United States won.
That's where he became
a huge war hero.
Yeah, Battle of New Orleans
was a big one too.
This guy's got a huge war resume,
Andrew Jackson.
Yeah.
I mean, this guy,
and he was around
since the revolutionary war so he'd been doing he uh he's born in 67 um in north carolina
between north carolina south carolina in the wax halls region i don't know what the fuck that is
somewhere in the south became a lawyer and then he was a fucking war hero and you're right yeah to be the the brit the
battle in new orleans in the war of 1812 against the british really fucking made him and he defeated
the spanish um and the seminoles to take florida so donald trump didn't do no shit like that
and andrew jackson wasn't really that divisive.
And that's why they argue.
Yeah, he knew who he didn't like.
He didn't really sit on the fence about it.
No, and Andrew Jackson was extremely popular.
I think, can we look at the landslide?
I mean, he was eight years, I think.
He was reelected, and I think it was a fucking landslide.
Because I know, and that, you know, it's interesting to talk about
because it's really,
it's been historians and people
who think about this type of shit
and I agree,
have kind of narrowed it down
to two presidents
that they compare Donald Trump to
and there's people who are more
on the Andrew Jackson fence,
which obviously Donald Trump
considers himself
more like Andrew Jackson
than there's people,
there's a new group of people,
Miller Fillmore. I see the Miller Fillmore more. Yeah. group of people uh, Miller Fillmore, I see the
Miller Fillmore more
I can definitely see the Miller Fillmore
so what happened was, presidential election
1824, yeah I remember this
um, uh, John Quincy
Adams was elected by the
House of Representatives
after Andrew Jackson won most
of the popular and electoral vote
but failed to receive a majority.
Interesting.
It's kind of weird because nowadays people win the popular but still lose.
So he won the most popular and electoral votes, but failed to reach.
That doesn't make any sense.
And then in the next election, he won.
He beat the same guy.
Yeah.
sense and then in the next election he won he beat the same guy yeah so he so they gave it the congress um the house of representatives took it away from jackson and gave it to john quincy adams
but that doesn't make any sense i don't understand that he won the popular can you figure that out
what does that mean why did they he won the they're saying he won the popular and electoral
vote but didn't get a majority that that doesn't make sense that doesn't fucking make sense but
anyway he won the next election by a landslide by a fucking landslide um as a democrat right
yeah he was a democrat he was a democrat bad he was a democrat back then they called them
democratic republicans fucking wild how it's all switched and then the wig party became republicans
and the democrats became uh i mean the the wig party became republicans and the democratic party
just became the democrats and the wig party disappeared And so did the Know Nothing Party, which is what Millard Fillmore joined after he lost re-election.
So that's a very interesting, interesting, interesting fucking thing.
Yeah, the Fugitive Slave Act. fucking thing um yeah the fugitive slave act also like we said before which fillmore was also
responsible for um was brutal man it was brutal and um federal commissioners were appointed
nationwide and they were given the power to adjudicate these fugitive slave claims.
And they could assemble, like, these local posses to capture slaves.
So it got kind of chaotic.
And the law really, like I said, the law, what separated it from the 1793 law, the original law, was that it imposed harsh penalties on anyone caught aiding a fugitive slave, which really appeased his Southern folks, even though he was in a Northern party that was anti-slavery.
So just like Donald Trump is kind of stretching what the Republican Party is, because the Republican Party used to be Christian, conservative, you know, a free market.
Now he's like he's fucking with the market internationally. He wants to impose tariffs.
He's fucking wants to lift sanctions on Russia with a Russia where the Republican Party is really tough on Russia, has been tough
on Russia. So he's really
doing a lot of things
that are the exact opposite
of what the Republican Party traditionally
did and traditionally was.
So in that way, you
can really see a clear comparison
to Millard Fillmore
who's, like I said, with
the Missouri Compromise and with the Fugitive Slave Act, kind of doing the opposite of what his party would want him to do.
He was doing more what the Democratic Republicans would want him to do, which had a huge foothold in the sales.
In the sales.
So we got some of this Andrew Jackson confusion settled.
So you need 131 electoral points to be elected president.
And this is one of the only inconclusive elections.
So no one reached the 131 electoral votes necessary even though andrew jackson had
i think over 40 000 he had 41.4 percent of the popular vote so he won that but uh the decision
eventually went to the house of representatives because no one had the necessary electoral votes
and they chose john quincy adams the son of John Adams. Yeah, from Mass.
Look at that count.
So he actually had more people.
Andrew just said that he...
Yeah, so that's just...
That's Donald Trump's fucking fantasy.
That he's...
Because he's actually the opposite.
He wants to believe he's the people,
but he's actually...
He lost the popular vote by a lot,
by a couple million.
Yeah, by like three million.
Yeah, a lot of people. To somebody
who people fucking hated.
I mean, he lost 3 million to
Hillary Clinton and Hillary Clinton's one of the least
liked people. Just viscerally
people don't like her. Do you think she's coming back? Do you think
that it's going to be a rematch? I mean, if she
fucking, if she's the Jason Voorhees
and keeps crawling out of that goddamn lake
and won't stay dead. We've got 4 more years of Trump then.
Then it'll be four more years.
I hope not, to be honest with you.
That's my personal opinion.
Trump is a fucking maniac.
It's got to be like Oprah or The Rock.
Someone big has to come.
The seal's broken.
We're not going back to normal after this.
Nobody's got the attention span for that shit anymore.
Some senator went to Yale,
been in the Senate for know been in the senate
for 20 years gets up there gives his first nomination speech that's everyone left and
right it's gonna be like fucking boring something spicy yeah dude are you fucking a porn star is
there hush money at least the vice president needs to be like beyonce yes something i mean we are there we're done we're fucking done kanye kanye yeah so after um
after uh the democrats won the next the 1852 election in a landslide um the wigs vanished
from politics and um they became the anti-slavery Republican Party. At the time, Republican Party was vehemently anti-slavery.
And then that set the stage for Douglas and Lincoln to go at it years later, about a decade later after that.
But this was all building.
This was all percolating.
after that but this was all building this was all percolating um and fillmore after like i said after he lost that election he went and joined um the it was called the quote-unquote know nothing
party and he ran as its presidential nominee again in 1856 with the slogan americans must rule america rule America. So similar.
And five years later,
Americans were ripping America apart.
Five years later, there was a civil war.
So five years later after that,
there was a civil war.
And a lot of historians,
some people,
I'm just saying,
even me,
you can kind of tell that he was a part of kind of Miller Fillmore added, you know, he added sticks to that fire.
He contributed to that divide, to that, you know, what made violence inevitable, what made a civil, inevitable. He contributed to that shit with the Fugitive Slave Act, the newer one, the Missouri Compromise, ripping the party apart, the anti-slavery Whig Party.
He fucking killed it himself.
And, you know, as Abraham Lincoln was trying to preserve the union as he was president, Fucking Fillmore was on the sidelines living in Buffalo.
I think he became the president of the University of Buffalo or some shit.
He was part of the University of Buffalo, which he founded,
which is why he's such a controversial figure in Buffalo,
because he's behind the University of Buffalo, but he's also a dick.
He's a big fucking dick.
So he would criticize, you you know with his little fucking
writings about lincoln so he's just on the wrong side of history and to make matters
even better he was the 13th president which is an unlucky number um so he just fucking lives in obscurity now but um you know when you look back a real big part of what uh american
history became um is in the destructive personality of millard fillmore who was kind of a wolf in
wigs clothing yeah i just made that up he was a fucking southern slave
owning sympathizer in wigs clothing
who became president
because Andrew
because of Zachary Taylor the war hero
died and even
though Zachary Taylor was opposed
to the repealing of
the Missouri Compromise as it stood
um
really feel more got in there.
He allowed slavery to spread
and acted as a fugitive act
and then fucking
ripped the divide even more.
And that's what Donald Trump's doing.
Ripping the divide open even more.
So let us know what you think.
Is Donald Trump more
like Andrew Jackson
or Millard Fillmore
I think based on the facts you could draw
I mean the facts are going to tell you Millard Fillmore
but if you're a big Trump person
which is your fucking right I don't care
I really don't give a shit anymore about nothing
all I care about is the history hyenas
you're probably going to go the emotional route
and go Andrew Jackson
even though like me andis just pointed out,
there is no real fucking comparison.
He's not a war hero.
He wasn't extremely popular.
And he didn't win the popular vote.
So there you have it.
Now, before we go, there's one stone we left unturned that I want to know.
It's like, what were his accomplishments, Andrew Jackson?
I want to know because there are, he is considered, I think,
so controversial. And I think we should talk about him a little bit, because there are a lot of
people who think, you know, Donald Trump's like Andrew Jackson, like I said. The person leading
that, the biggest cheerleader for that is donald trump himself so what did he do a lot of his accomplishments are war related so he's as president as president
go with the as president yeah what did he do he did some stuff as president i think um federal
reserve yeah biggest accomplishments as president come on i find it us a fucking quick one major accomplishments if we could go to the
and historical significance that one might do it oh that's a video though yeah yeah i'm gonna pause
this we'll find it hold on i hit the space bar right yeah yeah okay here we go we're back even
though it we didn't go anywhere to you we were gone let's say imagine we
did 20 hours of research no we just pulled it up um he was the only president to completely pay off
the national debt so he's the only president to ever do that to completely pay off the national
debt um which was one of his goals um he yeah the it was the the bad thing that he did
was called the Indian Removal Act
in 1830
you could kind of say
what's going on, build that wall
Obama deported a lot of people too
so you can't forget that
I don't know if there's much of a
the Indian Removal Act
relocated most of the Native Americans
in the South to Indian territories.
Now they're on reservation.
You guys know the story.
Teal the Trail of Tears.
You know the deal.
You know the freaking deal.
But he definitely opposed the abolitionist movement, too.
So he was the dick there, too.
Big dick there.
But because he opposed it, I think it probably grew stronger.
So you can kind of thank him for being a dick because I think that really started mobilizing people in a lot of ways.
Foreign affairs.
He did a treaty with Great Britain that settled the damages against the French during the Napoleonic Wars.
And he officially recognized the Republic of Texas.
They tried to shoot him.
Somebody tried to shoot him in 1835.
This is the first president to survive an assassination attempt.
Yeah, I mean, you know.
A Democrat.
He's a fucking Democrat.
a democrat he's a fucking democrat um he's a big part of the uh annexation of texas which was accomplished um by uh martin van buren and james polka you know but he was a big part of
an advocate for that and that happened um so he did some good things and he did some horrible things
when you look back at history from from now you'll from the vantage point of where we are now
obviously you say the bad was more than the good um one of the uh greatest feats that kind of goes
untouched is he vetoed an act to uh recharter the institution of banks because he said it was the advancement of the few at the expense of the many.
Yeah, he was a big populist and he hated banks.
He got what did he do?
He got it out.
He yeah, he vetoed a bill that was being passed through Congress.
Yeah.
He was he passed through Congress. Yeah. He was...
He hated the banks.
Yeah, I'm reading that right now.
He also first president to get impeached.
They dismantled the banks.
Jackson and his allies thoroughly dismantled the...
So he led the effort to reauthorize the Second Bank of the United States.
Henry Clay led the effort to reauthorize the second bank of the United States. Henry Clay led the effort to reauthorize the second bank of the
United States. Jackson regarded the bank
regarded the banks as fucking corrupt
and he vetoed it. You're right.
And boom. And after a struggle
he had it dismantled.
And he paid off the national debt.
So he did some things
but he got impeached.
What did he get impeached for this cat?
What did Jackson get fucking impeached for
we're just giving you a little bit of Jackson
just because
we gave you so much of film war
and there's a lot more to Jackson
anyway even though we're not focusing on him
but us focusing on
Jackson right now makes it that
we probably will not cover him again
I mean there's so much to cover
I mean God we're here trying to teach you guys history.
I mean, what would you do without us?
You know, entertaining you while we teach you history.
What do you get impeached for, Ice?
So, actually, we were talking about this,
about removing certain office holders.
His biggest charge was violating the Tenure of Office Act, which protected certain office holders that he fired without the approval of the Senate.
Oh, yeah.
Yeah.
Tendencies.
Those dictator tendencies.
That's why the founding fathers are so genius, man.
Because power corrupts.
Absolute power.
Yeah, basically he was getting crazy with his power.
He was trying to get crazy.
And thank God we got checks and balances.
The genius of those Renaissance men who are our founding fathers.
You know?
Their genius crosses party lines, guys.
So no matter what you believe, whether you vote red or blue,
you got to say the institutions of our government pretty fucking solid.
Pretty genius.
Shout out to John Locke and all the fucking people that set the stage for our government and constitution.
Well, there you have it.
Now we move on to the nature aspect
because look all of history
involves homo sapiens sapiens
we're nature's little
fucking favorite animal
and all
of the spirit of the
times in history
is based
on the environment on nature
we all live in nature.
And if you want to know the truth, like Albert Einstein said,
you want to know the truth about anything, everything, life,
look deep into nature.
Those are where the answers are.
So here we go.
Some fucking cool.
For a change, we're going to mix it up.
We're going to give you a nice one.
This is the first animal video we have shown on this podcast. Cool. For a change, we're going to mix it up. We're going to give you a nice one.
This is the first animal video we have shown on this podcast that does not have the murder.
There's no murder in this one.
This is a feel-good one.
Now, this is a video about, at the time, the dog has since passed away.
But this dog, this Border Collie,
and Border Collies are considered to be the smartest of all the dog breeds.
They're mainly used for sheep herding.
That's what they were bred for.
But they're fucking brilliant, these fucking things.
I'm saying fucking a lot because that's what I do.
And so this was a piece on that dog with Neil deGrasse Tyson.
This is cool.
With pride, if our dogs can respond to two or three commands but
what if we haven't begun to understand the possibilities of what the animal mind can
really do our friend astrophysicist neil degrasse tyson is host of nova science now and he brings us
big news from the frontier meet chaser walk up beloved six-year-old border collie of psychology professor John Pilly.
Good girl. John Pilly's like 104. He was born to live in the Scottish mountains. Look how old
this guy is. Tunnel, tunnel, tunnel. And herd sheep. Go, go. John has taught Chaser to tend
an extremely large, if unconventional, herd of a thousand toys. And she knows the name of every
single one of these? I hope.
I find this hard to believe, so
I test Chaser's memory with a random sampling.
Chaser, find
Inky.
Can you pause it real quick?
You think Neil deGrasse Tyson,
he probably got no puss coming up,
but now he's kind of starting to get puss.
Yeah, he has to.
He's a charismatic guy. He's a smart guy, but he's kind of starting to get puss. Yeah, he has to. He's a charismatic guy.
He's a smart guy, but he's really probably the most media-friendly astrophysicist.
Because astrophysicists, they don't really score high on the personality chart usually.
But this guy, he's the exception.
Well, I think it's usually they're just away solving problems of the earth.
Yeah, and they're always a little, you know,
their social skills is when you're in your brain like that all day.
But Neil deGrasse Tyson, I mean, he got the person.
He's an anomaly.
He's an anomaly.
Yeah, good word.
Anomaly.
Good word.
So anyway, yeah, we confess.
So Chaser basically knows a thousand.
He knows the names of these toys that are all named,
and there's a thousand of them.
That is fucking crazy to think that a dog, dude, I could not remember a thousand fucking
names.
One of the craziest things you've ever said was dogs like hurt.
I can't herd sheep.
You were like, dogs hurt sheep.
That's fucking wild.
I can't do that.
Yeah, I can't do that either.
But dogs can fucking do it and they keep them in a herd and it's very important.
You don't want to fucking stray.
You want to keep the sheep together.
Fucking wolves are kind and it protects the important. You don't want to fucking stray. You want to keep the sheep together. Fucking wolves are kind.
And it protects the sheep because wolves are trying to,
everything's trying to eat those fucking sheep,
and the dogs bark them off.
Wild.
So this dog, Chaser, with his 104-year-old professor owner,
good thing this dog is smart because if the owner had to walk him and he was like, if that dog had, if that owner had, you know,
had like a two-year-old terrier or something, or an energetic dog,
he would pull that old man right over and break his hip.
So Chaser can walk himself, thank God.
So that would let the owner live a little longer.
So fast forward a little bit to what he does.
So basically, he tests him on a few, and Chaser gets him right.
And then, well, you got to go back a little bit.
I'm sorry.
It's still in here.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Go back, go back, go back, go back, go back, go back.
Yeah.
Go back, back, back, back, back to about right there.
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
So we're going to see if she picks out Darwin by inference.
Find Darwin.
Pause it real quick. So what he did was he was like,
he introduced a toy that she had never seen before,
that Chaser had never known,
and he named it Darwin.
So he just put it back there,
and he just put it there.
Chaser didn't see it. He put the toy behind the couch where all the other toys are,
and he said, find Darwin.
So Chaser has no reference for which toy is Darwin.
So what Neil deGrasse Tyson wants to see is if because he knows the names of all the other toys there,
he chooses Darwin because it's the only one that's not the names that he knows.
So in other words, the dog goes, this one must be Darwin because all these other ones are not Darwin.
And watch what this fucking.
That's some smart fucking thinking.
That's a smart.
The fact that an animal can even do that is.
That shows it's like fucking thinking.
Now watch it.
This is wild.
I have to ask her again.
Okay, Chaser.
Chaser, Chaser, Chaser.
Find Darwin.
Darwin. Darwin! He's got Darwin!
She did it!
Chaser's never seen that doll before,
yet she settled on the one toy she didn't know by deduction.
It's similar to the way children learn language.
But how does Chaser's ability compare with other species?
Besides us, chimps and bonobos are the animal kingdom's top linguists, capable of learning
sign language, but very slowly. They can solve some sophisticated problems, but they don't
always pay close attention to humans.
When I see my dog, my dog wants me to be around. Whereas a bonobo and chimpanzee, they don't
need me. They're basically like, hey, you got any food? Can I get any food off of you?
They're not interested in making me happy.
Since dogs do like to please us,
then humans need to find a way to tap the potential in all of our dogs.
Okay, put it in the tub.
And dogs like Chaser are just waiting for us to discover all that they can do.
Smart dog.
So, yeah, that's basically it.
So, basically, the suggestion is and we i think we
talked about it like in a lot of ways for our purposes as far as working with us dogs are
smarter than our closest ancestor and we already spoke about how close we are to them i mean 90 was it 99 96 96 percent so we're pretty similar but yet dogs in a lot of
ways are smarter problem solve quicker because they're they've just evolved to cooperate with us
so efficiently so efficaciously efficaciously and chimps they you know chimps are just like
what the fuck are you doing around dude you know aren's kind of crazy when you think about it that it's an animal that put its puts like
you before itself and that's kind of what makes it so smart yeah exactly it's kind of wow it's
like the perfect it's like a dog is basically a slave to a human and that's what it feels the
most purpose is when it's like doing exactly what you want it to do that's what a fulfilled dog is
that's why if you're a dog owner don't treat your dog like a kid or exactly what you want it to do. That's what a fulfilled dog is. That's why if you're a dog owner,
don't treat your dog like a kid or a person.
You want to simulate jobs for the dog
based on its personality and its breed.
That's what makes a dog living in the amenities of modernity
where you don't need to use.
That's going to come up a lot.
We may make a t-shirt, amenities of modernity.
Yeah, bad.
But if a dog is not working, but you have them as a pet simulate jobs simulate that's what fulfills a dog even
sit lay down all that shit is jobs and that's what fulfills a dog that's what
makes a dog happy is when it's working for you even it doesn't know the
difference if it's a real job or simulated so there you got a little free
dog tip for me as well.
Now, I think we got one more video.
Is that it?
Oh, yeah.
This one is not friendly.
And this is how we're going to end it.
Because, you know, we do comedy and then we love to balance it out with a real tragedy,
a video that's really tough to watch.
Now, again, dogs evolved from wolves.
They are the direct descendants of fucking wolves.
Now, these wolves, unlike dogs, not so friendly.
So these are, this is a wolf pack, brutally attacking what has become the lowest member of the pack, which is called the Omega Wolf.
And they run up on him bad.
Now, there's the Omega Wolf
just chilling. He sensed it.
Now here comes the
leaders of the pack. The alphas.
Oh, there's four alphas
just surrounded the Omega for no reason.
They're just surrounding him. One of them took a bite. Now they're just surrounding him. And now the rest of the pack... Oh, there's four alphas just surrounded the Omega for no reason. They're just surrounding him. One of them took a bite.
Now they're just surrounding him.
And now the rest of the pack...
Oh, now they start fucking him up.
Now they're biting.
And the rest of the pack follows him.
And all the pack runs over and starts fucking him up.
Oh, it's brutal.
You can hear it.
They're not laughing.
Those aren't laughs.
Oh, God. They're not laughing Those aren't laughs Oh god The whole pack is now
Biting
The Omega Wolf
The lowest wolf
Because he has been deemed the weakest
Oh nature is fucking brutal dude
He's trying to fight back
There's too many of them
Swipe it yeah He's trying to fight back. There's too many of them. Gee, it's so hard to watch.
Swipe it, yeah.
It's so hard to watch.
But you gotta watch it because this is nature.
Oh, God.
It has a purpose.
His weakness slows the pack down.
It's that harsh to survive.
That's what reality is.
These wolves are not propped up by the amenities of maternity.
That was a good way to bring it all around.
Oh, God, it's tough to watch.
He's just getting jumped.
He's pushed up against the fence.
He really is looking for some sort of way out.
He's trying to get out, but he's surrounded.
And he's
just getting bit up. Now, those are wolf
bites. Those are not fucking
when you're, you know, when it's your birthday
and you get birthday punches. Those are not
charley horses.
Those are wolf bites.
So the video ends. We don't know what happens to the wolf, but I can guarantee you it's not good.
Yeah.
I don't think they made up.
I don't think they shook paws and made up after that.
I mean, he just took maybe about, what was that, 30 to 40 wolf bites all over his body.
So he's in bad shape.
And even if he survives, are you you just gonna hang out with the people
who just jumped you
yeah no
they're gonna leave his ass
and then you know
that's fucked up
because there's a new wolf
that becomes the omega
and you're like
fuck now it's my turn
but I don't know
I don't think they do
I think they only do that
when they deem
that the wolf is like
really really weak
and they just gang up on him
so whenever you see kids
in like a playground
and they like start bullying a kid,
that shit is in us.
That kid is weak.
That kid is weak and it's in us.
It's just in us and it's brutes, magoots.
Of course we're human,
so we got to use reason more.
And reason does not come naturally to us.
We're not a reason.
We're an emotional species.
We're a species that responds to instincts and
emotions to survive um so reason is something that has to you have to turn on you have to be taught
to be logical and reasonable and um you know whenever people says uh you know uh may may
you know have faith or i'm like, no, have fucking reason.
I believe in reason.
Faith is fucking scary.
ISIS is fucking works on faith.
He blows people up.
Bang.
Only if it's reasonable.
Only if it's reasonable.
So, on behalf of Trash Monkey,
Chrissy Sudote,
who's not here,
Zach Isis, myself.
Thank you for listening to the History Hayden Podcast.
We do have new members.
Wow, we've been going long. When Chrissy's not
here, you know what the problem is? I talk too
long. That's the great thing about Chrissy.
It gets wild.
Chrissy keeps it shorter,
which is good, because we are fucking
wild. So because I kept it wild,
you're not going to get any fucking Patreon episodes,
but me and Chrissy will double up or quadruple up on Patreon episodes.
Those are special episodes for our Patreon members only.
Go to Patreon.
Sign up.
Patreon.com slash Bay Ridge Boys.
Join our channel.
One buck a month, five bucks a month.
You know you're supporting us.
You get the bonus podcasts,
which there are a ton of,
a backlog of,
that if you're just listening for free,
just go fucking sign up.
Support us for a buck a month.
You get to listen to all those extra episodes.
Plus, we're going to be posting
all types of crazy content.
If you recommend five friends
and prove it to us,
and you get five of your friends
to start listening to History Hyenas podcast,
Chrissy DiStefano will come to where you live
and suck your dick.
And I'll send you an autographed photo.
But here are the new members of our,
you know what it is now?
Fucking cackle.
Our matriarchy, but our cackle as well.
Thank you for joining us.
Here we go.
Jonathan Gerardo. He's Italian. Here we go. Jonathan Gerardo.
He's Italian.
Is that Italian?
Jonathan Gerardo?
Gerardi.
That's it.
Gerardo's Italian.
Yeah.
Dr. Nick.
Finally, Dr. Nick signed up.
Fucking, did we read these already?
Is that the guy that Chris sent his shit to?
That's the ass doctor.
Yeah.
Very cool.
No, yeah, yeah.
These are, are these old?
This is from June 14th he sent it to me.
What are we in, July?
Yeah.
These are fucking old.
Yeah, we're in July.
Where's Bardo?
Where's the fucking new ones, Bardo?
He sent them to me.
Where's Bardo?
Dude, Bardo is on some sort of... Did we do these ones?
Big Relio, Ken Marshall, Spencer Carlson, Jason, Jackie Mustafa, Shannon McNamee, Brian Wisniewski, Henry Sardegnas, Tom Hendricks.
I don't think we did those.
I don't think we did those.
I don't think so.
But you just got your fucking name, Brett.
So there you go.
We've been long already,
and I'm just double-checking to make sure that that's the latest.
I don't know.
We'll get it all straightened out when Chrissy's back next week. So I'll be at Uncle Vin vinnie's point pleasant new jersey um in august on um
the 8th to the 11th and me and chris will be together at the borgata
in atlantic city from the 5th to the 8th so august 5th to the 8th, me and Chris will be at the Borgata in Atlantic City.
From the 9th to the 11th, we'll be at Uncle Vinny's.
That's a fun August.
So if you live in Jersey, come out to either one of those.
Check me out alone at Uncle Vinny's or both of us at the Borgata.
We love you, and we'll speak to you fucking next time.
Cackles out. ស្រូវាប់បានប់បានប់បានប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់