History Hyenas with Chris Distefano and Yannis Pappas - 76 - Jack The Ripper was WILD!

Episode Date: June 23, 2019

The boys talk about Jack The Ripper and all his WILD ways! Who was he? The kid gave haircuts? Wild! The boys tell you who the kid really was! Mystery solved by f & b INC. Want more Hyena content? ...Check out www.patreon.com/bayridgeboys where things get really WILD!Follow us!: 🙆🏼‍♂️🐕🙆🏻‍♂️🙆🏼‍♂️Chris Distefano on Instagram, Twitter, website🙆🏻‍♂️Yannis Pappas on Instagram, Twitter, website🐕History Hyenas on Instagram, Twitter, website Subscribe to the poddy woddy on YouTube, iTunes, Spotify, and HH Clips

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Starting point is 00:00:00 What's up, cuzzy wuzzies? You're listening to the Bay Ridge Boys, History Hyenas, Bad. We're just a top. Because I just I got Alzheimer's. This is why you can't start. I'm the one that has to start. You FF. I was trying to say we're a couple of I was about to say we're a couple of FFs cute kids and true blues and I got
Starting point is 00:00:52 tangled up and tongue tied between all three. You got tongue tied. I'm indecisive. By the way, real quick, I just want to shout out even though they're not a sponsor of the podcast. Smith, how water department shout out Matt Kleinschmidt. I think that's his last name um he's uh he runs um riot cats right now and he just got um he just got me and yanni hooked up with us um a
Starting point is 00:01:12 subscription to blue chews which are the erectile dysfunction drug and i uh don't need them but i did send them to my boy pat finnegan patty fly ball so patty if you're listening congratulations you're gonna be rock hard for summer. Because I just took a blue chew. I got a boner right now. Pewing! Pewing! Pewing! Because, yeah,
Starting point is 00:01:31 they're going to advertise on our podcast. Oh, they will. Yeah, so it was interesting because you... I thought that's what that email was about. I thought that Kid Matt is screwed in. No, Kid Matt is screwed in. Well, let's be honest.
Starting point is 00:01:40 He can't be that screwed in, but he's screwed in enough. Yeah. He basically, yeah, I think they're going to start... We're going to read ads for them, Well, let's be honest. He can't be that screwed in, but he's screwed in enough. Yeah. He he he basically. Yeah, I think they're going to start. We're going to read ads for them. But they did give us a subscription to it for free. But because it's like a actual drug, I had to I sent them right to Patty Fly Ball's house.
Starting point is 00:01:57 But they had to. Patty had to fill out all this stuff. But then they a doctor had to FaceTime me and i had to prove that it was me and put my license as my information but just a different address oh well it's great that you're admitting this on a public podcast so yeah you commit that they're sponsoring yeah and like yeah it's just a crime what you did it's called fraud it's medical malpractice and you should lose your fucking physical therapy license no well obviously i was kidding them. Yeah, you shouldn't be allowed to touch anyone. You should not be able to touch anyone physically.
Starting point is 00:02:28 Yeah, touch them physically. Because you are just... Not myself, I'll take you physically. There we go. Look who's decided to join the... To show up. To fucking show up. He's a 23-year-old kid.
Starting point is 00:02:40 He's got tatted fingers. He went to a school where he twirled around and danced. Give it up for Zach Isis. Zach Isis. Fuck him up. Yo. So, yeah, and Vanity is in here. Thank you.
Starting point is 00:02:52 You brought your grandma's cookies. They're really good. I ate one and then stuck another one up my ass. We got Mike Emoji Faces here, and I gave Mike Emoji Faces. I just want to say congratulations to him. I got into the podcast about 45 minutes ago. I was the first one here with Mike and I went to Bagel Schmagle in Bay Ridge and I got an egg white sandwich and I got a muffin because I'm feeling a little down. So I got a toasted
Starting point is 00:03:15 blueberry muff with butter and then they gave me a second toasted blueberry muff with butter and I didn't want to eat it. So I gave it to Mike Mush and I just want to say congratulations because he's been looking at that muffin for 45 minutes and hasn't taken mike mush and i just want to say congratulations because he's been looking at that muffin 45 minutes and hasn't taken a bite i just want to say congrats that's a record yeah well you know this is let's just be crystal clear about something all right i'm gonna just go all cc about what mike mush is doing right now yeah because i'm familiar yeah i'm familiar yeah there's people around right now so mike mush pretends that he doesn't mess with that stuff. He's like, you know what? Right now I'm just doing salads.
Starting point is 00:03:48 I'm not even doing the croutons. I removed the croutons from the salad. And that's his public face. Yeah. But underneath his floorboards in his little studio apartment or wherever he lives, he's got a little Snickers cabinet. Yeah. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:04:00 Where in private, he's going to fucking eat that muffin. I know what you're saying. He's going to go to the bathroom and fuck that muffin. I'm going to fuck that muffin. No, I'm being honest. He's going to fucking eat that muffin. I know what you're saying. He's going to go to the bathroom and fuck that muffin. I'm going to fuck that muffin. No, I'm being honest. It was just me and him. He could have fucking cracked it open and cleaned it out immediately, but he just put it down behind him.
Starting point is 00:04:16 So I'm proud for him. Now, I'm not saying the minute we leave, the fucking aluminum foil may even be gone. That's what's going to happen. He may take the whole thing. Yeah, he's going to swallow one bite. But for right now, I just want to say congrats. Zach, for the first time ever, was late for the podcast. First time.
Starting point is 00:04:31 First time ever, truly. Zach's always on time. Which is surprising because he's fully muzzed out. Yeah. And those people don't respect time. Because I'm a muzz. Greeks are late. And I got some muzz in me, genetically.
Starting point is 00:04:48 And I'm always running late. And Zach is zach is very german about he's very like you he's very punctual you yeah i'm on time venetia was late but that's greek time she's running on greek i mean the minute i'm allowed to check in for my flights i check in for them i'm talking about the second in 24 hours before i fucking check it and i'm just waiting and then i check in because cause i'm a german kid And this world needs a little bit more efficiency So You want it clean I want it clean You were right on with that
Starting point is 00:05:13 Just kidding No listen you're a type of kid You're always standing at attention You're always very pewing And I always as Yannis said I always have the national anthem playing in my head And I did for the first time in my career And it's a thing I'm always feeling. And I always, as Giannis said, I always have the national anthem playing in my head. And I did for the first time in my career. And it's a thing that I'm going to do every time I came out to the national anthem at my shows in the Dayton Funny Bone.
Starting point is 00:05:32 That is a true story. That was my walkout music. Our last walk and talk was 100% unadulterated, hyena level wild. Yeah, I mean, you were talking. I was for the first time questioning whether we should put that out. Yeah, it was wild. And then we thought of it, screwed an idea. We gave it for the $10.
Starting point is 00:05:50 We have a cackled version. For the $25 members, go to patreon.com slash Bay Ridge Boys. You can hear the uncackled version of what our walk and talk was yesterday. Patreon.com slash Bay Ridge Boys. That's what we're going to start to do now. $10 is going to get the cackled version. The fucking not explicit, to made for TV. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:06:07 And the twenty five dollars are going to get full unadulterated raw gay sex. Mazel mazel. Yeah. We are fucking screwed. You're going to fucking listen to that podcast and get HPV in your ears. Yeah. And there was one Patreon member, one of our members of the matriarchy who posted since the situation with the mother's been resolved by that
Starting point is 00:06:26 guy banging her out, we've been screwed in and the Patreon content is back and fucking above expectation. Yeah, absolutely. I just want to shout out whatever that guy's name is. Thank you so much for helping me resolve the situation with the mother. Did you see that comment? Because since the situation with the mother's been resolved by
Starting point is 00:06:42 the guy who's banging her out, you guys have been great on the Patreon. Yeah, no, I appreciate it. Yeah. We also got a team now. Yeah, we got a fucking team. We got a fucking history. I mean, this team and we got a we got a millennial on it. We got a millennial.
Starting point is 00:06:55 But more importantly, because, again, as much as as much as I know that, like, you know, we all have a good time there before Venetia came. You know, we would tuck our dicks back and we would say, we're the matriarchy, we're the matriarchy. And we all want to have pussies. I know that. But we weren't born with them. But Venetia was. Venetia was born. She was created.
Starting point is 00:07:12 Yeah. Actually, you know, hyenas are a matriarchal woman, female driven society. And we were playing pretend that we were in our herds gazing Serengeti without a female leader. So we were just around. Cackles, cackles. Yeah. Yeah. We were just around just throwing our pseudo penisesgeti without a female leader. So we were just around. Cackles, cackles, yeah. Yeah, we were just around, just throwing our pseudo-penises around and cackling and not really doing anything. But now that we have a true female hyena leading us, things are getting better.
Starting point is 00:07:36 We got a mid-chuck, and she's already, like, that's how Greeks do it. They show up a little late, and then they just start bossing people around and giving people cookies. Yeah, and giving people cookies. That's what a Greek mother does. And sure, he told Mike Emojiface that it's designed for the Qs. The smoothie t-shirt sucked. And the and giving people cookies. That's what a Greek mother does. And sure, he told Mike EmojiFace that it's designed for the kiddos. The smoothies t-shirt sucked! And the kid spent all day making no mistake, that's the face of a kid who loves anime.
Starting point is 00:07:57 Yeah! Cuz, it's Mikey. Cuz, that's a kid who likes anime. Just a kid who's in shorts 12 months a year. Cuz, watch what I'm going to do right now. Listen, we are fucking screwed in. We are creating a new level. Patreon.com slash Bay Ridge Boys. We are now supporting artists.
Starting point is 00:08:14 If you're a musician or a comedian like Rosh Poska, you got fucking grandfathered in at the $100 level. The $100 level is now closed because our podcast is getting big. We're fucking growing. We're too big. So if you're going to advertise with us, you're going to have to give us a little bit more money. So if you are an artist, you can join at
Starting point is 00:08:36 our $250 level if you want to promote your music or whatever. We want to support artists just like you're supporting us. So we'll spread the word about you. And for our business sponsors, it's $500. That's what it is. But we have a $250. Don't try to get slick.
Starting point is 00:08:52 Don't try to get fucking slick because we will Google you and we will find out that you're just a dumb fucking startup app company. And you're trying to pretend like you're a banjo player and get it at $250. We will do the research because we're fucking screwed in and we're surrounded by Jews. Yeah. Can I get a crumb? No, I need a way. Jean Jean. God damn it.
Starting point is 00:09:11 I know you're a song. Yeah. He's only used to give them to you. But once in a while, I go too wild as well. I just want to also give a shout out to any of the people who who have listened to this podcast. I was with Sal Volcano this past weekend, and he told me that the episode
Starting point is 00:09:27 between me, Giannis, and Tim Dillon did where we just shit on the Impractical Jokers cruise, that I'm not allowed on the cruise now. I got banned from the cruise because the fans hate me so much, and the other guys at the Impractical Jokers heard it, and I'm not allowed on the fucking cruise, but I listened to the episode.
Starting point is 00:09:42 A lot of the things that you think I was saying that practical jokers fan stick was my voice. It was Tim Dillon saying it, not me. So you guys just cost me fucking five K scumbags. Yeah, but you also did say that you you also admitted on the podcast that you gave an excuse, but you were lying. Yeah. And then it's just one of those things that happened where Sal had to look at me in the back of the cab and be like, did you did you make something up? And I was like, no, I really had a situation. I had a situation with the mother. And he was like, because you could just be honest with me.
Starting point is 00:10:12 And I was like, yeah. So it's just one of those things where like Chrissy Greenlights, where I just for a moment was like, oh, maybe I should have went on the red light. Because there's moments in life where it's just a better idea to fib. To fib, yeah. And you you may do a quickie fibby yeah you may but you don't feel comfy wonky inside a quick a fibby wibby i don't feel and eventually you're just gonna say what it is and say what it is because make no mistake i i really every single day now as i've gotten older i just strive to be comfy wonky all the time throughout the day and
Starting point is 00:10:42 the way i'm the way i've realized is is is to optimal comfy, wumpy for me is to try not to lie as much, to try not to put too much on my plate. And I guess I try not to lie. Unless it's a two. Unless it's a two. You're not going to tell the truth about where you're going. No, I have an sexual intercourse in a month. Yeah, that's a lie.
Starting point is 00:10:59 That's good. I can see it in your face. Yeah, no, it's true. Look me in the face again. Tell me you didn't have to. 30 days. 30 days. Yeah, that's a lie. Well, no. When's the last time? When did we go. Tell me you didn't have to. 30 days. 30 days. Yeah, that's a lot.
Starting point is 00:11:05 Well, no. When's the last time? When did we go off to pizza? I don't know, but I know that. It was probably three weeks ago. You're telling me your dick hasn't been pioing in 30 days? Oh, no, it's been pioing. I've been fucking jerking off a lot.
Starting point is 00:11:15 It's Pride Month. I've been spinning the wheel on Point Hub. And make no mistake, it's been landing a little bit too much on gay on gay, male on male sex. But it's just what it is. That's the only way I can get peeing but i haven't had sex with a woman and it feels very good and i got cluster fest this weekend in san francisco and there are four women flying to san francisco to potentially have sex with me and i don't want to i didn't invite any of them podcast i didn't invite any of them we're out do we need
Starting point is 00:11:36 to tackle that maybe but i didn't i don't want anybody to come i just want to hang out with guys because you only listen ladies i didn't mention any names. There's four of you. He's only got one penis. That math doesn't add up. No, I don't. No, no, no. I don't have any penis. I don't want to do anything. Do you understand? I've been feeling so good in my life not dealing with women. It's been great.
Starting point is 00:11:57 There's going to be a time where your penis looks back up at you and goes, I've had enough. Yeah. I can't go peering anymore. I can't go peering. I need a blue chew. I need a blue chew. You've worn me out. Yeah. And goes, I've had enough. Yeah. I can't go peering anymore. I need a blue chew. I need a blue chew. You've worn me out. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:12:11 Cause your penis is aging in dog years. Yeah. It's an old Vietnam veteran. Yeah. Can we please get an animator to animate Chrissy's penis and make it sound like an old grizzled Vietnam veteran. Go on Giannis Papas' Instagram and listen to the video of his dad and just think that's what my penis is. Yeah, that's what just think, that's what my penis is. Yeah, that's what it is.
Starting point is 00:12:25 That's what my penis is just saying. I look pretty fucking good for a 90-year-old guy. Because you're a fucking 35-year-old kid-to-be, and your penis is a 90-year-old man who's fought in a Korean war. Yeah, my penis is a fucking guy that loves to paint. Because it's just what it is. Watch how screwed I am right now. Oh, here we go. We're brought to you by Ninth Street Auto Collision,
Starting point is 00:12:46 CBD script, Vidora Rajpaska. Use 15% off. If you want 15% off, go to CBD script. You get that. They're fucking CBD oil. All right.
Starting point is 00:12:58 Just use the promo code Hyenas15. You get 15% off CBD script. Ninth Street Auto Collision. They're fucking out on the island. If you got a problem with your car, they'll crack it open and clean it out.
Starting point is 00:13:08 Give them a call. 631. I know it by heart now. 351-5300. Boom. Nutrition Made Fun. That kid's eyes are way far apart. People have been sending cartoons that look like his face.
Starting point is 00:13:19 Yours are too close. His are too far apart. Me and him are going to have to square off in the octagon. Kid's ripped up, though. He's ripped up. Nutrition Made Fun. Go follow him are going to have to square off in the octagon. Kid's ripped up, though. He's ripped up. Nutrition made fun. Go follow him on Instagram, Nutrition Made Fun. The kid's got all types of plans for you to get healthy.
Starting point is 00:13:32 And then, of course, a healthy, happy smile cosmetic dentistry. That's a healthyhappysmile.com. Or you can follow him on Instagram, Healthy Smile. Dr. Harvey Spencer Jr. and his piece of a wife are cracking teeth open and cleaning them out down in Rock Hill, South Carolina. And I just got a quick Instagram message from Joey Kamaster,
Starting point is 00:13:54 Mr. P79 on Instagram. Snooki's co-host on their lovely podcast, Happening Podcast. It's Happening Podcast with Snooki and Joey. He's going to be our guest coming up. But he just sent me a message, said, OK, I'll be there by one. You boys need to be blindfolded on all fours when I arrive.
Starting point is 00:14:10 Strictly anonymous. Pump and dump. That's what it is. So just FYI. We're all go. Vidura Rajpaska. Live from the sandbox. Live from the sandbox dot com.
Starting point is 00:14:21 Check him out. He's a comedian in Berlin. He's not open for me at the Soho Theater. I was just told. Yeah, by ice. Yeah, it's just what him out. He's a comedian in Berlin. Who cannot open for me at the Soho Theater, I was just told. Yeah, by ICE. Yeah, it's just what it is. That would be- Soho Theater.
Starting point is 00:14:29 Fedora, if you're listening, you can't open for me. I've only got room for one comic. Sorry. It's what it is. Sorry, but still buy a ticket. And of course, the company that's getting over on us because they're a successful company and they keep growing- Who, Lakeside Maple?
Starting point is 00:14:43 Yeah, they should be paying us more. Is that the kid with the eyes? No no that's not the kid with the eyes oh that's nutrition made fun that's nutrition made fun that kid is a that kid is a nutritionist go follow he's a good kid what is his name is uh matt kotch right he's a good fucking kid and uh go follow him on instagram but lakeside maple they actually have like they're in like they're like a warehouse company. Yeah. I mean, and they got a great product. Like this kid's going to be a fucking millionaire.
Starting point is 00:15:08 Listen to me. All right? We're going to just cancel you at some point. We're just going to cancel your Patreon and you're going to have to send us bigger checks. And it's what it is. So Lakeside Maple, go check them out. It's granola. They bake them in pure maple.
Starting point is 00:15:24 The kid had a great idea and he's crushing it. It's granola. It's baked in pure maple. The kid had a great idea, and he's crushing it. It's granola. It's baked in pure maple syrup, and you throw it in your yogurt. You throw it in your cottage cheese, whatever type of FF you are. Whatever you eat for breakfast, it goes with. If you want 15% off your order, go to lakesidemaple.com. And what's the promo code again? Wild.
Starting point is 00:15:45 So the promo code is wild. Go to Lakeside Maple dot com. Go get this stuff because it's trail mix. It's delish. Go buy it. And listen, you only got a couple of weeks left before we hit you up for more money. Money. Today, we're going to do an episode about Jack the Ripper because you fans, the Patreon members have decided decided that's what got the most votes,
Starting point is 00:16:06 is you dragged the Ripper, so we're going to get to that. And it's going to be beautiful, because there's a lot of things we've got to talk about with Jack the Ripper. But I just want to mention real quick that Giannis was in Miami last weekend, and he threw hands for the first time ever with Sergio. Yeah, one, two, three combos. You know what Sergio said to me? What? And I really just wanted him to tell you, but he was getting mad.
Starting point is 00:16:24 Like, come on, man, stop. He just said, I'm a natural. Yeah. He goes, wow, kids are natural. Yeah. Because I throw hands now. Yeah. And you could go righty or lefty. Because I'm ambidextrous. So it's just what is. We were in Miami. There were Hyena fans that came out to the show.
Starting point is 00:16:40 It was great. Thanks for coming out. We had a blast. It was me, Sergio, and Angelo. We're just moving Puerto Ricans across state lines. Yeah. It's what it is. It's what it is, right? Yeah. And now I want to play a game called Is That Venetia?
Starting point is 00:16:52 Or Is That Giannis Imitating Venetia? Ready? Okay, let's go. Yeah, word. Dope, dope. Yeah. I fucking like that. It's too anime.
Starting point is 00:17:01 You guys, yeah. Dope, word. Upper West till I die. I can't. I'm'm gonna be in great sorry guys i'm a little late it's fucking word okay so that's either that may be venetia or that may be yannis the person in venetia now now let's try it again let's try it again this could be me or venetia right yeah i think that it was like really nice You gotta put her fucking mic on Isis
Starting point is 00:17:27 Do we pay him Too much Do we just pay him too much Okay I think that it was a very nice t-shirt It was just a tiny bit too anime But like it's Aida We're gonna make a new one and it's gonna be It's gonna be dope don't worry
Starting point is 00:17:41 Dope So who was it? Venetia or Yanni imitating Venetia? You'll never know. Was the first one Venetia or was the second one Venetia? You'll just never know. Word. Yeah, because I got a lot to do today, but I'm happy
Starting point is 00:17:58 to be here. Can you keep her fucking mic on, you muzzy? Can someone please call the Department of Homeland Security? Yeah, he's out of here. With Sergio. How was it? It was fucking dope. It was so fucking dope.
Starting point is 00:18:15 But where'd you do it? In the hotel gym? Yeah, we did it in the hotel gym and we weren't supposed to be doing it and eventually someone from the hotel came and was like, hey guys, can you just like, cause we just were throwing hands where like there was people who were staying at the hotel who were trying to just run on treadmills. And he was going like one, two,
Starting point is 00:18:32 and I was just, he didn't have any mitts. I was just hitting his hands. And, uh, yeah, I'm just a natural cause. I mean,
Starting point is 00:18:37 I, I should have been boxing earlier, you know, the thing is, here's a mean street. Here's what, here's what I like about it. Here's why I'm really happy That Giannis is boxing
Starting point is 00:18:45 Because you can't wait To punch my face No because I That's the thing about you Is you keep saying You're a natural And then you do what you do And it's just clear
Starting point is 00:18:52 You're not a natural I'm an FF Yeah you're an FF And Sergio said the same thing to me He's a fucking liar He's screwed into Trying to get us to give him His love
Starting point is 00:18:58 Yeah he was So the truth is Is that because you're A very arrogant guy And you've said this before Is the arrogant guys That step into the boxing ring when they get stretched out. I mean, because I want to fucking be there the first day.
Starting point is 00:19:10 They're going to make your head. You know, like when you know, like when the Chinese women wear those rings to stretch out their necks. That's what your fucking head's going to look like after a sparring match. I just want to be I want to be there when your headgear gets turned around and your glasses aren't twisted on your face like the ff that you are and then the true colors come out and sergio is just standing there with his mouthpiece dripping his fucking puerto rican sweat on you i really want that to happen because you're an because the number one reason people get beat up and boxing because their egos and arrogance yeah i'm gonna be stretched out quick i mean i'll learn my lesson though the truth is is is is i'm an ff no you're not an ff the truth is well you are an ff the truth is though
Starting point is 00:19:46 with boxing it's just such a beautiful thing to watch people just really just get the arrogance beating the fuck out of their face because sergio i've watched him spot the only reason i'm saying this i've watched arrogant guys step into the ring with sergio you know training on the side at overthrow and watch him spar people at his clients and i mean the way he beats their fucking heads in yeah and then you could just hear them round by round being less and less arrogant by the fifth round they're just they're dead yeah they're just well you know what it is it's like it's like uh comedy you remember i first time i did comedy i was like oh my god i'm amazing at this because all my friends and family were there just paid you know laughing to support and then you just realize how bad you are at it yeah yeah so it's like that's just it seems like it's very similar to boxing because
Starting point is 00:20:29 you're alone you think you're a superstar and then you get stretched out a few times yeah you know well like yesterday um not yesterday monday i you know i've been training with sergio for a good amount of time now and then we spawned and he went for real and 40 seconds i i like one i like quit i basically quit i was like i can't do this and then he had to like go back to being like 10 speed because you spar someone you hit the pads and you do all that stuff and it's great but then like when you actually spar with someone who knows what they're doing like i don't everything he taught me it's just gone because he'll tell me like okay i'm gonna you know duck roll and then so you know what's happening.
Starting point is 00:21:05 But when you're just someone's throwing a punch at you, you just combine the duck and roll and fall on the floor. I almost didn't recognize you without your overthrow sweatshirt on. Yeah, I'm wearing all black today, like one of these trendy new pre's. Yeah, if you don't have a spin FH or. Yeah, what is it? Spin FF. What is it?
Starting point is 00:21:22 Spin FH. Spin FH, right? Yeah. And yeah, he's getting a lot of free promo, but he's a screwed in Greek and he's your friend. Yeah, if you're from Queens, if you live in Queens, go to Spin FH in Forest Hills. Just Google Spin FH and it's a spin studio. And there's a couple of great instructors there. One of them is the situation with the mother.
Starting point is 00:21:42 So go take her class and then you'll just see the situation i deal with yeah and if you're a 25 member you may see an edited version of the situation with the mother yeah i may post a picture of the situation with the mother it's just what it is i had a situation yesterday and i'm gonna have a situation today so if the door raj paska is not can open for you vedora raj paska i was told by the Soho Theater that he's on a terrorist watch list and he can't. And they said, well, actually, they said that they don't do
Starting point is 00:22:11 we don't do support here. It's just the headliner. Can you just go there and just tell them to stop? Just tell them, like, I'm going to go over there. I'm going to go over there and say, listen, Nigel, whatever your dumb fucking name is. Here's the truth. Let me be crystal clear with you.
Starting point is 00:22:26 I got Fedora Rajpaska open for me. I got Mike Emojiface open for me. And I got Vanity open for me. Okay? So that's what I'm going to do. And here's the reason why I'm going to do it, because I don't care about your rules. It's because in 1776, you sent your fucking redcoats over, and they tried to come in through Bay Ridge, Brooklyn.
Starting point is 00:22:43 And guess what? They got beaten back by the fucking boys. Yeah. So unfortunately. Unfortunately. Unfortunately, my great country, the great laws of the United States had to bail your dumb country out for years and years and years. So now I make the rules at the Soho Theater.
Starting point is 00:22:56 Yeah. So the truth is, I'm just going to do it. I'm going to do an hour and a half worth of comedy American style, because let's be honest, the England belongs to the United States. That's what it is. We just give you guys freedom, and we make you make-believe, but the truth of the situation
Starting point is 00:23:09 is anytime you guys get a boo-boo, we're the Band-Aid. Yeah, we're the Band-Aid. Loud 14. Good one, Zach, good one. Yeah, you can also go to patreon.com slash Bay Ridge Boys and listen to our ancillary podcast
Starting point is 00:23:23 called Loud 14. Loud 14. Yeah, with Sean Terry andder 14 Ladder 14 Yeah with Sean Terry And Patty Mulroney Yeah Sean Terry Patty Mulroney And Colleen Senior And Junior Yeah just so
Starting point is 00:23:31 So go check that out Cause I want you to go Over to the fucking Soho Theater And I want you to say I want to come out To the National Anthem Yeah
Starting point is 00:23:38 Like you've been doing Yeah That's gonna be your new thing You come out to the National Anthem Yeah I want you to have a fucking American flag cake Wrapped around you
Starting point is 00:23:44 Like Hulk Hogan. Yeah. And make that whole audience of Brits stand at attention and go pewing for the fucking USA anthem. Yeah, pewing. Stand at attention, pewing. Yeah, and I'm going to do it. The Monday night show, it's a theater that holds 300. I got about 38 seats sold, so I'm going to make all you fuckers get up and do it. Yeah, Cosmo.
Starting point is 00:24:04 So it's just what it is. Yeah, the matriarchy... In England, it's taking a little while for the matriarchy to catch on. Yeah, because it's not proper. Yeah. Yeah, but because I'm going to go over there and make no mistake, I'm going to spread the matriarchy like HPV. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:24:17 Gardasil's neck can't stop us. Yeah. I feel like your accent's going to be interesting for them. Yeah, well, the thing is, what I do... I feel like your accent's going to be interesting for now. Yeah. Well, the thing is what I do, like you ever seen The Departed when Mark Wahlberg kind of sniffs out Leonardo DiCaprio, goes, oh, you probably changed accents being from a Southie. You know, you're from this. You got the Southie shit.
Starting point is 00:24:36 He called him Andrew Schultz. Yeah. Yeah. And he called him Switcher. That's what I do a little bit. Yeah. That's what I do a little bit. I switch.
Starting point is 00:24:42 I turn it on and off. Yeah. So, yeah, because the truth is, I don't know who the real me is because I, as I was saying before the podcast started, when my anxiety gets really high, when I have the crippling anxiety, which has happened a lot in my life. You peruse Grindr a few times. Well, I don't know because I black out. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:24:54 Like, I genuinely, I have no memories of big things in my life. Shout out Father Bill. I have no. Guys, have you ever killed any prostitutes? No, no. I don't think I've ever killed a two. Jack the Ripper has. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:25:04 But I don't think I've ever killed a two. So, what do has. Yeah. But I don't think I've ever killed a two. So what do you think? I've actually never been with a prostitute ever in my life. So what do you think happens during those blackouts? I don't know. I'm blacked out. You think you go on sugar runs? Do you think?
Starting point is 00:25:15 What do you do? I don't know. But like. Ever hook up with a guy? There's things in my life. I don't know. Because there's things in my life that I'm shown pictures of. And they're like, don't you remember this?
Starting point is 00:25:24 And I'm like, I do not not how many laps have you been in how many guys laps have you actually just went over and just sat in their lap like just you mean like a random stranger just a big strong man that you feel like could protect you well i don't know i did a promo video for my shows at soho theater in london with the great sal vulcano and i was like hey can we do a video and he was like yeah maybe I'll just make a video and I was like how about I just lay on your bed how about I just lay on your stomach in your bed and he was like uh okay
Starting point is 00:25:51 and then all my all my ideas were just sitting in his lap or laying on his lap so you do there's something about getting in a guy's lap that makes you feel really comfy wumpy yeah I just do feel comfy fucking wumpy yeah cause you're just you're just a wild kid. Yeah, you just call me Chrissy Bottoms. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:26:09 Look at the J.B. Williams. I'm reading this. Sal wiping his brow. Wheel was spun. Make no mistake. Chrissy Bottoms just let Sal go two rounds on the throat speed bank. J.P. Williams. J.P. underscore Williams. 10 out of 10. 10 out of fucking 10 because we got 10 out of 10 comments
Starting point is 00:26:25 10 out of fucking 10 Cuz we got a lot of funny comments This was my favorite comment from the And then we gotta get to the ripper Yeah From the walk and talk We got this FF coming in at one This guy goes
Starting point is 00:26:36 Jeff Williams Non-toot Non-toot Jeff Williams No fumes His name is Jeff Williams Non-toot No fumes Yeah
Starting point is 00:26:43 He said Chrissy came running up with new Mountain Dew sneakers and came right out with the Steelpipe USA USA. Yeah, the walk and talk. Oh, the Patreon, oh, yesterday. Yeah, the Patreon walk and talk just starts like 100 miles an hour. Yeah. And you, you're Steelpipe from the minute we start. Patreon.com slash Bay Ridge
Starting point is 00:27:00 boys. I think, because I listened to the first 10 minutes, it's just you and you're talking about really interesting, great stuff and then you just hear in the distance someone yelling trump 2020 and then and then the podcast takes a different turn instead of way sean sheehan now we're going to start also we could do way sean sheehan and ladder 14 mean the same thing yeah that's that's what we wanted to tell you zach yeah you can always go ladder 14 we're doing a character piece yeah if i say something's fucking if i say something's so nuts like you know things that i say then just say
Starting point is 00:27:34 ladder 14 venetia can you do another poll on the patreon or somewhere and just ask the fans if we pay zach isis too much don't even tell them what it is i just want to see what the fans say there's a part in the walk-in talker chris is like zach if you're doing your job you'll edit fans if we pay Zach Isis too much. Don't even tell him what it is. I just want to see what the fans say. There's a part in the walk-in talk where Chris is like, Zach, if you're doing your job, you'll edit this out. Oh, yeah. He listened to it. Zach does good, but he's a 23-year-old kid. He's a 23-year-old kid with tattoos on his fingers. Jennifer Bagwell.
Starting point is 00:27:57 Jennifer Bagwell. Is back? Welcome back. Wow. Thank you. Welcome back, you fucking non-two. She's fucking screwed in, though. You went from two to non-two. Yeah. She was like she disappeared. And then she said, hey, you guys better fucking get your back together. And if you do, I'll join back.
Starting point is 00:28:11 And she joined back. And she says, welcome home, babe. She says on that video, if I give a carton of Newports to Aunt Eileen, will she show me the basement where Uncle Victor had to correct some pendejos on her Instagram? Because make no mistake, Aunt Eileen's on Instagram. Yeah, she's on Instagram, Aunt Eileen Molina. No. Yeah, but
Starting point is 00:28:32 nobody, that's not the real one. So don't try to search Aunt Eileen, but make no mistake, it's just a matter of time before Aunt Eileen finds this podcast. Because our logo for the History Hyenas on Instagram is so funny. It's just fucking me, you, and the baby. Yeah, it's hilarious. It's a 10.
Starting point is 00:28:46 Yeah. Yeah. Cuz, we did a poll. Benatia put up a poll. No, it was Mike. Huh? It was Mike. Oh, that was Mike that put the poll?
Starting point is 00:28:53 Oh, Mike. Thank you, Mike. Oh, Jack the Ripper, by the way. Jack the Ripper is him. I did the t-shirt. We're now an hour and 15 minutes in. He hasn't even looked at the muffin. Go ahead.
Starting point is 00:29:01 Yeah, where is the muffin? It's behind him. Yeah, cuz. He hasn't even looked at the muffin. And it's a toasted blueberry muffin with butter. Maybe he's turning them off because there's fruit in it. Wait a second. But wait a second. I think maybe
Starting point is 00:29:13 you figured something out. Why? Now, muffins with butter, that's basically that's a two for my camocha face. Yeah. You know how Venetia is here. You're a bear and that's a salmon and you can't get the salmon, but it's got you at attention. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:29:30 You see, you see the thing and you know, you're the dancing bear. You know, we get you to do tricks. We get Chrissy, just stay in your seat and be funny. We got the salmon right here. Venetia wave. Yeah. And you just follow the salmon with your eyes. Maybe we just got to bring in a muffin every day for Mike Emoji.
Starting point is 00:29:43 Yeah. That's what we got to do. And then we got to bring in the head of a Jew for ISIS. Yeah. Can I get a Wei Zhongxin, please? Or a ladder 14 for character piece. Wei Zhongxin. Wei Zhongxin. I'm just doing a character piece
Starting point is 00:29:55 that Sean Terry is just a character piece. Now, listen, we're definitely at war with that religion. Yeah. Ladder 14. Do you hear the ladder 14? No, I don't have the headphones on. Yeah, Chrissy, you have no idea what's going on at all times. Can you play it out loud? The Ladder 14 is hilarious.
Starting point is 00:30:10 I don't have headphones on. Yeah, he... I don't even know where they are. He sampled one of us going Ladder 14. It's hilarious. I love how you don't want to mess up your hair, but your hair doesn't move ever, guys. No, I don't put on the headphones not to mess up my hair. You can't get them around that big fucking head?
Starting point is 00:30:26 I just feel, I don't know. I just never liked the headphones. Yeah. Even, I don't care about my hair. I'm not going anywhere. Let me hear a lot of 14. Yeah, just kidding. A lot of 14.
Starting point is 00:30:34 Yes. One more time. One more time. A lot of 14. By myself, I'll take you specifically. Yeah. I just need you back on point, cuz. Do we still have the old ones or are they gone?
Starting point is 00:30:48 We need to re-record them so I can put them into this. That's all right. We're a wild podcast. I want to ask the fans, do we pay Zach Isis too much? Too much. Even our soundboard is only here for a good time, not a long time. Yeah, the soundboard is here for a good time, not a long time. The podcast itself is here for a good time, not a long time. Yeah, the soundboard is here for a good time, not a long time. The podcast itself is
Starting point is 00:31:05 here for a good time, not a long time, because make no mistake, I gave my mother access to the podcast. Now Annalena has an Instagram. My cousin, Blooming, has an Instagram. And it's just a matter of
Starting point is 00:31:22 time. Your cousin-in-law listens to this podcast. Yeah, whose husband does. My 14th. Yeah. Because a lot of 14s are killing me. A lot of 14s. And it's just the podcast, unfortunately, it's just probably not going to be able to go on for too much longer
Starting point is 00:31:42 because I'm going to start getting sued by family members. It's just what it is. It's going to be able to go on for too much longer because I'm going to start getting sued by family members. It's just what it is. It's going to be cease and desist. And I don't know what we're doing, if we're going to just have him on this episode or we're going to do a next episode, but Joey Camasta, you're about to hear the gayest man on the planet Earth. Yeah, well, we're going to get that episode out right before Pride Month ends,
Starting point is 00:32:00 which is, you know, June is Pride Month. He just posted on your Instagram, piss in his asshole. I said, I said I said I posted a picture of me In a suit last week And his comment was Just very short and concise It said
Starting point is 00:32:10 Piss in my ass That's what his comment was So I mean And then He told you What did he say to you once He said just fuck me in the ass He said just fuck my asshole already
Starting point is 00:32:20 Yeah And then he said He said he wants to Pump and dump Cum in our ass And we need to be on all fours blindfolded. It's just what it is. It's just what it is. He's a gay guy. But let's get to Jack the Ripper. Jack the
Starting point is 00:32:29 Ripper is a kid who really liked to cut out the uteruses of women on occasion. Now, we don't know still who Jack the Ripper was. There was a lot of speculation in recent months that they they think they think DNA analysis found out who it was.
Starting point is 00:32:47 It was a Polish kid, Aaron Kosminski, they think, who was a barber, who was actually born on September 11th. He was born on September 11th, 1865. It was a direct attack on our country. Shout out Smithtown Water. Shout out Smithtown Water, a lot of 14. A lot of 14. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:33:03 I always thought Jack the Ripper was Johnny Depp from the movie. Yeah, I know. Ladder 14. Yeah. I always thought Jack the Ripper was Johnny Depp from the movie. Yeah, I know. Did he play him? Who played Jack the Ripper? No, Jack the Ripper,
Starting point is 00:33:12 that was Sweeney Todd, the barber. You... I'm a... Johnny Depp was in From Hell, a movie about Jack the Ripper. Well, because that letter
Starting point is 00:33:20 From Hell, right, is the only... There was a letter that the London police got and it said it was entitled from hell. And they believe it's the only letter that actually was from Jack the Ripper, because a lot of these letters were just forgeries. Yeah, which is, you know, London, the people of London started to have fun with this thing at the actual time it was going on, which made investigating it, investigating it a nightmare. Yeah, it was much like the Charlie Ross situation where it became a big media frenzy
Starting point is 00:33:49 and a lot of fake people started pretending to be Jack the Ripper and sending fake evidence or fake leads or fake letters. Now, Venetia, killing prostitutes and cutting out their organs, is it kids or brutes? Totally brutes. Oh, brutes totally totally rude word word
Starting point is 00:34:06 um yeah dirt now i'm going to london next week and i'm gonna go on the jack the ripper walking tour through the east end and i'm gonna go with debo and debo bringing debo yeah i said to debo i said i said um i said hey man saturday i got tickets for us to go to the – at 7 o'clock, at 7 p.m. I swear. I said, at 7 p.m., we got tickets to go on a walking tour to see Jack the Ripper, to do the Jack the Ripper tour. And he goes, is that tour going to be inside? And I said, no, it's a walking tour through the different destinations on East London. And he goes, 7 o'clock there.
Starting point is 00:34:40 I swear to God. He goes, 7 p.m. He goes, so what time does that mean? It's in New York. And I said, it's going to be about midnight in New York. And he said, he said, I could. That means the Mets will be done by then. It'll be done by then.
Starting point is 00:34:50 Because I swear to God, he asked me at our hotel. He was like, where? No, it's going to be. It's going to be 7 p.m. It'll be 2 p.m. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:35:00 Well, sorry. I told him the wrong information. So he's going to be. But I could just tell him it's midnight. It doesn't matter. I could just tell him it's midnight. It doesn't matter. I could just tell him it's midnight. It doesn't matter. But he asked me, he was like, in London, do you think that they have SNY, which is the
Starting point is 00:35:12 channel that plays the Mets? And I said, they don't. And then I swear to God. And then he said that he called Verizon and asked if there was a package that he could get. I really am just regretting inviting him, but it's just what it is. It's just what you do. It's just what I do, but I'm not regretting inviting him.
Starting point is 00:35:29 He's a great kid. All your friends are great kids. They're Mets fans, hardcore. If he has a kid one day, he's going to name that kid Shea. 100% for the stadium. Or Keith after Keith Hernandez. Or maybe Gary Carter. Gary Carter. A full first name will be Gary Carter. Gary Carter. What full first name will be Gary Carter. Gary Carter. Gary Carter.
Starting point is 00:35:45 What's his last name? DiBernardo. Yeah. Gary Carter. DiBernardo. Yeah. Or, you know, just Daryl Strawberry. Yeah, no, you can't do that. Yeah. So, we're gonna go on this walking tour, so we'll have more information. I'm gonna learn stuff, and we're gonna put that obviously on another podcast, maybe the Patreon.
Starting point is 00:36:02 Make some videos while you're there. Oh, yeah. I will, of course. And I'm going to Newcastle Which I'm going to go on tours of the Roman forts Benetia has us screwed in, that's the first thing she was like Can we get, listen, she's like, listen We need to get a fucking History Hyena shirt On your back For you when you go to London
Starting point is 00:36:18 She wanted to ship it directly to London, but it's not going to work out Well, we should have had the t-shirts a long time ago This is our fault, but now we got Queen Matriarchy here. It's got us back in shape. We'll order it. We'll have like a fun photo shoot if you guys will agree. Yeah. Thanks. She's totally right. So, so, yeah, real talk.
Starting point is 00:36:35 Yeah, real talk. Yeah, for sure. So Jack the Ripper, JTR, he killed, the police think he killed 11 women, but there's really five that they focus on called the Cannicle Five. Yeah. Because he really fucking went to town and cut out their organs. And really, it got pretty brute. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:36:51 That's why they thought he was like, you know, a surgical. He was surgically trained. Yeah. But it turns out, I guess the latest is that he was this barber kid. And they thought the people of London are funny because they thought there was a rumor starting that it was actually the Duke of, I think it was York. No, not York. A local Duke, like a member of the English royal family.
Starting point is 00:37:18 They were saying that it had to be him because really they just hate the royal family so much. I mean, if I was a British citizen and I got a breakdown of my taxes and saw how much tax dollars go to pay for fucking Buckingham Palace, I'd be furious. I'd be like, we can get rid of this fucking royal family right now. We can get rid of them. It's really weird because it's still like that.
Starting point is 00:37:38 In Norway, they got a royal family. Sweden, they got a royal family. Denmark, they got a royal family. I think even, does Greece still have a king? No, they got rid of that shit. So no royal, she left in Greece. But those countries that still have the royal families, ceremonial royal families,
Starting point is 00:37:53 they like them. If you talk to the people. Oh, the people want it? Okay. They kind of like it for some reason. They're like, you know, they're like ambassadors for the country. They go across. All right. So if they're not mad at it. But it's still no, they're just stupid. And the only reason the only look, let's just let me can I just be CC for a second? You be CC and I'm going to be CC.
Starting point is 00:38:11 The only reason they're OK with it and the only reason that they can always bash America. Let's be let's be crystal clear. Yeah. It's because we're defending them. Yeah. If you had to pay for the level of defense that we provide. Yeah. If you had to pay for the level of defense that we provide, then you wouldn't really be not upset about part of your tax dollars going to a fucking dumb inbred royal family. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:38:35 You know what I'm saying? You wouldn't be able to afford it because you'd have to send the planes that we provide for you. Because make no mistake, don't act like you use different oil. You use the same oil we do. We just show up and we do the dirty work and you send a food truck and then you're mad at us and it's as simple as that it's i'm kind of sick of europeans fucking yeah it's also like it's also like yeah at any point is your fucking dumb royal family ever on our news channels maybe once in a while when one of the kings or queens or fucking princes or princes gets married or shits out a baby. But other than that, why don't you just stop worrying about
Starting point is 00:39:06 our politics? Because we don't give a fuck about yours. Yeah. Yeah. How about that? Yeah. Stop criticizing us or you can go fight for yourself. A lot of 14. I just like to put on CNN and then watch Anderson Cooper talk about some dumb story. I like to sneak up to my left so I can get my hands down my pants.
Starting point is 00:39:22 Yeah, but I just love that when they just critique us like as if they don't use the same oil. They don't, you know, they don't benefit from what we're doing. Look, it's all dirtbag shit. That's what empires need. They need oil. You need fuel. And we go get it. We go get it by gun. Yeah, by gun
Starting point is 00:39:38 we get it. Alright, so back to Jack the Ripper. It's not right, but it is what it is. So back to Jack the Ripper. Yeah, 1888 is the year that he was killing these prostitutes. Yeah, he was killing toots. There is some some people think that Jack the Ripper is not this Polack kid who was an Eastern Hemi who was in and out of insane asylums. No, they don't.
Starting point is 00:39:56 They know it wasn't him because he because it because then if it was an Eastern Hemi, what you would find is every time he killed somebody, you'd find a couple of cans around because they're picking cans. Wei Zhongzhen. I'm just kidding. I was just kidding. But yeah, you might find it just a can of seltzer. Wei Songxian.
Starting point is 00:40:15 And a recycle bag. It's what it is. Ladder 14. And a stick. Wei Songxian. They attach the two bags to the stick. They got bags they attach the two bags to the stick? They got bags on, yeah. And that's what it is.
Starting point is 00:40:29 Ladder 14. Ladder 14. And yeah. So they think it was this Barbara commencing. They think it was this Barbara, but they also He's a Polack kid.
Starting point is 00:40:39 But there's also some, okay, Mike's trying to bend down and get his phone. Let's listen in on the breathing. Yeah. Okay. It's kid. An down and get his phone. Let's listen in on the breathing. Yeah. Okay. It's an hour and a half. No muffin.
Starting point is 00:40:53 So they think some people think that he actually left London, this guy, and made it made his way to New York City and killed a couple of prostitutes in New York City. See the danger in being a toot and not going to patreon.com slash Bay Ridge Boys. Not one non-toot was murdered by Jack the Ripper. Only the toots got murdered. So there you go. That's a little lesson. It's actually a great point. Yeah. It's actually a great point.
Starting point is 00:41:16 But Jack the Ripper, man, look, they say it's Kaminsky because they found some DNA on this, what is it, shawl? Yeah, shawl. They found the DNA. One of the. Yeah, a shawl. They found the DNA. One of the murdered women, they have the shawl. The Brendan shawl.
Starting point is 00:41:32 The Brendan shawl. They found his DNA on it. You think. It's like, what's his DNA doing on there? But then there's people who critique the study, the peer-reviewed study that says that um it was it was commenced kosminski kosminski who did it say ah you know the it's been a long time the shawl's been touched by a lot of people it's been contaminated
Starting point is 00:41:56 but it's kind of like why would his dna why would it be on the shawl right i mean right well i mean but they're saying can you put that back up but they're saying real quickly that it was mitochondrial dna and that it's so it's been contaminated so much and touched by so many different people that like they're not direct matches they're just like very close so it could really be anything that's what they're saying if it was actual dna like today you can't miss with that. The DNA can get 100 percent match. But that's not what this was. I don't even know how they have suspects, really.
Starting point is 00:42:29 It's like back then we always talked about that. Like, how could you catch someone if you didn't see them do the murder? You could. Well, you could. You could. Yeah. You would pin it on people, but you couldn't actually be. You know, I couldn't prove it. And the thing the thing working against this Kosminski theory is that the kid was a barber. He was supposedly psychotic and suffered from bouts of psychosis where he would have to spend time in an asylum. He tried to kill his sister.
Starting point is 00:42:57 Yeah. Oh, he did? Yeah. His own sister? Yeah, he put a knife on his sister. Well, maybe he had a situation with his sister. Could have had a situation with his sister. Maybe she tried to blow him.
Starting point is 00:43:04 I've been there. Way song she ain had a situation with his sister. Could have had a situation with his sister. Maybe she tried to blow him. I've been there. Way song she ain't. Thank you, Zach. Yeah. He also threatened one of the nurses at... Yeah, but maybe she's being a bitch. Yeah, at the ascent of the sun
Starting point is 00:43:15 with a knife. Yeah. But that's really the only, you know, hardcore kind of like personality profiling. Right. I mean, like, whoever did this knew how to cut out a uterus, knew how to cut out organs.
Starting point is 00:43:28 Yeah, knew how to cut it up. Yeah, I mean, there's no question. You can't say the person who was Jack the Ripper didn't have any surgical training. Like if you started killing someone, would you know how to cut out an organ cleanly? You'd make a mess of the situation. I'd make a mess of the situation. I do have some experience cutting up cadaver bodies i told you about this oh yeah when i was a physical therapy student i
Starting point is 00:43:50 cut open some stuff i skinned the face and then i told you i was i got to the point where i was able to eat over a dead body and i was eating fettuccine alfredo and a noodle fell into the body and on the exam the next day the noodle was still there dried up inside the body and right next to it he had uh dr fut Futterman, what's his name? He had a piece of the small intestine pinned that we had to guess what it was. And my friend Rich Brooks was like, what about that fettuccine noodle? Yeah, you're a strange kid that's scared of ghosts, but you're okay around a dead body. Yeah, I had to skin a face.
Starting point is 00:44:18 And then Dr. Futterman in front of us, he normally is not supposed to do this, but there was a body that we had to be working on facial muscles and he brought out a chainsaw and decapitated this dead body right in front of us. Blood? Was there blood in there? No, it's all dried and frozen. But I mean, we just saw him cut a head off. And you just start looking at it like it's scientific and medical at that point.
Starting point is 00:44:41 Not by then. By then I was still like, you you know grossed out by but by three weeks in it's like yeah it just becomes i mean one of these one that like some of these bodies had like pubes and stuff like you would just be able to cut it reason for that huh did you have a reason for the chainsaw to do that or because you can't cut it reason to be kicked off well no you have to make a clean cut to cut through bone and muscle and fat it's hard and the only thing that would still be creepy like like even today, is like some of the bodies had like their nails painted or like, you know, they died.
Starting point is 00:45:12 Signs of life. It was just and that makes it really fucking weird. Yeah. Or tattoos that you saw. Yeah. But if it was just like a old white bag of shit body, it's like, you know, you just like whatever. You just cut its head off, cut its dick off. It just doesn't matter off it just doesn't matter we skin the face because all there's all facial muscles there's
Starting point is 00:45:29 a whole part of physical therapy about you know rehabbing people's faces after strokes and stuff like that so we had to learn so i and i just i like got nominated to skin the face so i just did it and then i blacked out why did you get nominated i because i think like i don't know like i look like a man but you know obviously i'm not so i think they were just like chris can do it he can feel he can build stuff he can do this he could do that but really i was just fucking shaking in my boots doing maybe he just wanted a little change from all the filipino he's just always a filipino kid doing it yeah i can change the pace how about 14 what do you what the percentage in in New York City of physical therapists who are
Starting point is 00:46:05 Filipino? Truly, if I'm being dead serious with you, I would say over 80% are Filipino. We're Filipino, Chris. I'm from the Philippines. Ali Wong said you can't do these voices anymore.
Starting point is 00:46:21 Oh, yeah, but it's our case. She watched my special and said you can't do ancient voices. By the way,, but it's our case. She's German. She watched my special and said, you can't do Asian voices. By the way, I watched Ali Wong's movie. It's great. What's it? Later, maybe? No. Always Be My Maybe. Always Be My Maybe. It's seriously like a great movie. It's like a beautiful
Starting point is 00:46:37 romantic comedy. It's just full of Eastern Hemings, so you gotta get over that. Ali's an old good friend. Can we get a lot of 14 and a Wei Shangxin? Wei Shangxin. Yes, thank you.
Starting point is 00:46:53 I was just kidding. Ali's a good old friend. We love Ali Wong. This was the letter from Jack the Ripper. Can Venetia read it? Because she has a nice, soothing woman's voice. Okay. Hold on.
Starting point is 00:47:06 Let's see if we can have Venetia read it. Okay. So, Mr. Lester, don't. Fucking yeah. Said you have the kidney. Fucking yeah. Don't. Fucking yeah.
Starting point is 00:47:16 Okay. Venetia, go. Mr. Lester. So, wait. But this letter was a big deal because it was delivered with a kidney. Oh, nice. And do you remember how- Cutes are brutes brutes. So, that's why- But this letter was a big deal because it was delivered with a kidney. Oh, nice. And do you remember how- Cutes are brutes brutes.
Starting point is 00:47:28 So that's why- Why is there just like an air conditioner? What's the sound that's just going through my headphones? It's the AC. It's the AC. Because if we didn't have the AC on, you look like it's a mating. Like when there's no AC, your German DNA code, and it's hot in here, you just look like a pilot. And the plane is in a tailspin. It's no AC. You're German DNA code. And it's hot in here. You just look like a pilot. And the plane is in a tailspin.
Starting point is 00:47:48 It's going down. I just you just want to scream Mayday. Mayday. You're just red. You're fucking. Yeah, you're puffed up. Like you need it to be cool. You're a German kid.
Starting point is 00:47:56 OK. Yeah. All right. You want us to turn it off? No, leave it on. Mayday Chrissy. So they thought that this guy was actually illiterate because of the way that he spelled. But maybe they also thought it was like a front that he was misspelling just to kind of throw them off.
Starting point is 00:48:11 Yeah, exactly. So he says, Mr. Lusk, I send you half the kidney I took from one woman, preserved it for you together. Peace. I word. I did it. It was very nice. Nice. And I see I may send you the bloody
Starting point is 00:48:27 knife that took it out if you only wait a little longer sign catch me when you can mr lusk yeah oh it's leonardo dicaprio who's the killer that's who it is i said mr lusk say i send you half the kidney and took one from one woman, preserved it for you to the piece I fried and ate. It was very nice. I may send you the bloody knife that took it out if you were only waiting a while longer. Signed, catch me if you can. You can, Mr. Lusk. Do you see the way that it started, though?
Starting point is 00:49:02 From hell. From hell. From hell. They didn't write letters like that. No. That's creepy. So this is the one they think was actually from him, right? Because it came with the kidney.
Starting point is 00:49:11 So it had to be from him. What do you mean they didn't write letters back then? What do you mean? They were saying how it was just really, no one really started a letter like that, like introducing such a dark introduction. It's usually, how can I put this? It's usually like, hello to whom it may concern, something like that.
Starting point is 00:49:29 Yeah, dearest Mr. Willis. Like, hey, how are you? Like, here's a kid. Yeah, this is started from hell. From hell. Wow, yeah, I mean, so whoever this was is completely demented. So this actually, this came, they were able to confirm that it was a kidney from one of the toots?
Starting point is 00:49:51 Actually, or it probably was. It probably, if it came with a kidney, so yeah, it's probably, has it been concluded, Mike, that this was actually from him? From who the killer was? The original letter and the kidney have both been lost. Yeah. A lot of other things from the Ripper files were lost, probably stolen by some collector or something weird like that. Yeah, because that, you know what? That's the real story to me about Jack the Ripper is that it really exposed how people really have a hunger for true crime stories. Right.
Starting point is 00:50:26 You look at how popular even now true crime podcasts are, how popular movies are about serial killers, how fascinated the media has become with killers like, I mean, Ted Bundy. The list goes on. I mean, we're all fascinated. For some reason,
Starting point is 00:50:41 we're all fascinated. And it makes you wonder, does life imitate art? You know what I mean, we're all fascinated for some reason. We're all fascinated. And it makes you wonder, does life imitate art? You know what I mean? Does do these killers? Obviously, you got to be psychopathic or sociopathic to do that type of thing. But does the interest that we have in it fuel their bloodlust to get attention? You know what I'm saying? Right. Like because serial killing is is sort of like a, it's probably always been around in some form, but it's kind of like a modern phenomenon in the sense that there's this kind of like cat and mouse game with the police that they always play.
Starting point is 00:51:17 Even the son of Sam was, you remember the son of Sam in New York, 78, was sending letters to the police and the Zodiac Killer. It's this media game. Like, it's almost as if the killer is aware that they have now become infamous and a star. And they're almost killing as part of the show. It almost feels like it's becoming part of the show. Right. You know what I'm saying?
Starting point is 00:51:38 Right. And then copycats. It's like. So that's my question it's almost seems like media the the development of media and serial killing kind of you know simultaneously grew right it's like as media became popular and people and gazettes were everywhere and people could read media and stories um this sort of is like a dark side of that phenomenon. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:52:06 You know, it's like you get your stories and make, you know, because media is what made people famous. Actors didn't used to be famous. Right. In ancient Rome. And it was like little. You were like a fucking drunk. Shakespeare was even in the Elizabethan era.
Starting point is 00:52:21 The writer was famous. The actors weren't famous. Yeah. But then when media became a thing, when like print happened and then, Elizabethan era, the writer was famous. The actors weren't famous. Yeah. But then when media became a thing, when like print happened and then, you know, and you could really reach a lot of people and sell papers, then people started to become famous. Like fame started to become a thing. It used to just be like people knew the royal family, maybe a couple people. But now it's like you're starting to make people famous with like this public relations this pr publicist you know just like pushing everybody's famous telling stories about people no at that time like the media created your fame and they also created your infamy you
Starting point is 00:52:55 know what i'm saying so if you were a killer they're writing about you they're making you infamous right jack we only know about jack the ripper because of the media well that's why it happened in the in the london which was the center of the universe at the time. That was like the New York of its time. 1888, there was immigrants from all over the world flocking to London to try to find work. It was actually center of the universe where the media was. If this was happening in fucking Kosovo, you know, we would never. It probably was.
Starting point is 00:53:21 We never hear about it. Well, the thing is, that's why nowadays, like even on CNN or any media outlet, anybody that like shoots up a thing, they don't, they try not to put their face out there or their name. They try not to give them fame anymore because they're realizing this, that it makes people want to do it. It has to have something to do with it. Yeah. No, I'm sure it does.
Starting point is 00:53:41 Yeah. Why would you want to shoot up a school if you're not going to get credit for it? You know? Yeah. It's like, it's a, it's's like, it's a dark side of humanity. We got a lot of new Patreon members. A lot of people went to patreon.com slash Bay Ridge Boys and joined the matriarchy because we were coming. Are you going to fart?
Starting point is 00:53:56 No. Okay, I thought you were leaning up. No, we can't do that anymore. Okay, yeah. Because I've noticed that you haven't farted since we've had Benatini in here. You've just been holding him? Um, no. You just eat better. I could hold them. Um, no, I could better.
Starting point is 00:54:07 I could push one out. OK, so we got a few. We got a few names and some of these are good names. So let me just read them out quickly. That's what happens when you join. When you go to Patreon dot com slash Bay Ridge Boys, you will get your name right out at the end of the podcast the first week that you join. So we just like to give you guys a little shout out. And always try to make your guys' names funny and in brand with the show.
Starting point is 00:54:29 And then we can get the PPW, Pseudo-Penis of the Week. Yeah. Okay. So first one, Miguel, I'm 50% sure my grandfather was a Nazi that escaped to Mexico. It's a PPW nominee. Started right off the bat. Wow. Look at this one.
Starting point is 00:54:41 That was a Ricky Henderson lead off. This is if Venetian Yannis had a kid. It'd be this name. Panteles Mil Henderson lead off. This is if Vanity and Giannis had a kid. It'd be this name. Panteles Milotis. Ah, my Laga de Ganes. Yeah. De Guinida. Next up, Stephanie Phelan.
Starting point is 00:54:54 P-H-E-L-A-N or Phelan. Next up, Ladder 14 Jobs. Ladder 14. Ladder 14. PPW. And Phelan is an Irish girl. Phelan. Phelan.
Starting point is 00:55:04 Then next up, Mike Make make no mistake, Speriace. That's a sauce monkey fucking, that's a steroided sauce monkey. Yeah. Then we got Alisa Pompeo, who dropped off and then came back. Welcome back, Miss Pompeo. Welcome back, Miss Pompeo. Then we got Abel. I got a situation with the mother DS.
Starting point is 00:55:24 That's another PBW. Wow, this is going to be a tough one. We may have to vote on this one, all of us. Then we got Liam Robbins. Nice Irish kid. Anna Abskolou. A-B-A-T-Z-O-G-L-O-U. She's got a situation with the name.
Starting point is 00:55:42 With the name. Situation with the name. Then we got Pericles from Bay Ridge. He's a Greek. He's a Greek. His name's Pericles. He's in his mother's house. Reese Bailey, who just keeps joining and then deactivating and joining again.
Starting point is 00:55:58 You're screwed because you probably not getting charged. You're fucking screwed. Listen, Reese Bailey, we're fucking on to you. Yeah, we're going to cancel your membership just like Lakeside Maple. Yeah. Reese're fucking screwed. Listen, Reese Bailey, we're fucking on to you. Yeah, we're going to cancel your membership just like Lakeside Maple. Reese Bailey. Anthony Franco. Joey underscore Brooklyn.
Starting point is 00:56:14 We got a lot of Italians. Then we got Casey Crystal Clear Spudis. Greek, right? Spudis? No, what is this? Spudis, S-P-U-D-I-S. Is it Spudis? Spudis? Could be Greek. Could be. Joseph Katz. Joseph Katz. That's Officer Katz.
Starting point is 00:56:30 Officer Katz. Yeah. Alex Cantor. Alex Cantor. Alex Cook. Alex Cook. Hi, Cook. Michaela McBride. Hi, you're doing. Timothy Green. What's up, Timothy? Daniel Pieda. Que pasa, mi gente? Rene Melendez. Que pasanee melendez situation with the mother
Starting point is 00:56:47 yeah jackson mowry jackson mowry irish kid crystal figueroa then we got one names back to back dalton and katie black kids jamie torek i don't know what that is richard zelensky oh wow it could be the jack the ripper and this one this one brings up memories for me this guy's name is father bill father bill join your patreon we're gonna have to let's we're gonna have to do a vote on who the ppw is because father bills oh shit alex heatherly you're blacked out now right right? Yeah, I'm blacked out. Alex Heatherly. How you doing, heathen? Blake Harts. Blake Harts. Waspiler.
Starting point is 00:57:27 Johnny 116th Eastern Hemi. Okay, we got an Asiatic. Yeah. Then we got a Scouty Coon. Okay. Clay Griffin. Clay Griffin. He sounds like a baseball player.
Starting point is 00:57:40 Dan South Jersey Steel Pipe Pickens. Oh, it's another PBW nominee. Chrissy, just a plain white dude with a Deez Peace Brewer. Because this is the, by far, the funniest list of Patreon members. This is the best one. Next up, we got Sasson Fumes.
Starting point is 00:58:04 That might be my favorite. And then we got Millie slid into Chrissy D's DMs when she moved to Veggie Vegetables Hernandez. Wow. Wow, wow, wow. And then these last ones, they're still great, but just no funny names, so I'm just going to read them quick.
Starting point is 00:58:21 We love you. Thank you for your support. And you can always go back and change your name, and then we'll read it. Jose Fernandez. Que pasa? Tony Hutzel. Ha. Keon. What's up, brother? Na me. Na me. Mike Ryu. How you doing? Meredith Wallace.
Starting point is 00:58:37 Hey, Meredith. EQ. Nitsan Chodrov. Right from Chernobyl. Alright. Rob Castiglia. Que pasa, mi gente? Patrick Burney. A lot of 14. A lot of 14. Patrick. Go off. Itlia. Get past me, gente. Patrick Burney. Lot of 14. Lot of 14. Patrick, go off as the Patrick Sarge. Yeah. Drake Lindberg.
Starting point is 00:58:49 Screwed in. Screwed in, kid. Jay Green. Jay Green? And then Grant. Grant Kahn. Grant Kahn. He's a German.
Starting point is 00:58:56 He's a German kid. So thank you guys so much for joining the Patreon. Go into patreon.com slash Bay Ridge Boys. We appreciate your service. Yeah. Who is your PPW there? I'm going with Sasson. Sasson for me.com slash Bay Ridge Boys. We appreciate your service. Yeah, who is your PPW there? I'm going with Sasson. Sasson Fumes? I'll say I gotta say Father Bill. Father Bill,
Starting point is 00:59:12 yeah, alright, but all you guys. They're all great. That was a dream team of PPWs. Yeah, if we sent that fucking team over to Europe, we dominate. We dominate. So yeah, check out all We dominate. So, yeah. Check out all our dates. First of all,
Starting point is 00:59:28 follow us on Instagram at History Hyenas. Patreon.com slash PayRidgeBoys. At Yannis Pompous on Instagram. At Christy Comedy on Instagram. Also YouTube. Go follow us on YouTube. Go follow us on YouTube. YouTube.com slash History Hyenas. Yeah, because we're fucking monetized.
Starting point is 00:59:43 Mikey, what's your Instagram? At Mike V. Suarez. At Mike V. Suarez. And Zach, what's yours? Yo, man, I don't really give my... Yo, Zach, I don't really give my shit out, man. Just listen to my balls. You know what I mean? Hit me up on SoundCloud. Mine is at Z the Dropout. I have another song coming out tomorrow. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:59:58 I'm Venetia. What's your Instagram? Mine's my name. Venetia H. Harris. I already got like a few followers. Venetia H. Harris. Yeah, and don't fucking say anything disrespectful to Venetia.jaris. I already got a few followers. Venetia Ajaris. Don't fucking say anything disrespectful to Venetia. Because it's my wife. She's our company wife. Yeah, go and go to OnTheVolleyApparel.com and get our t-shirts.
Starting point is 01:00:17 We got a whole bunch of merchandise up there. Yeah, we have a Coco shirt, which I'm about to cop. I love that shirt. We got the No Fume shirt. We got the Witch Hazel shirt. What else do we got coming up there? And then on the Teespring, we have the It's What It Is and regular history hyenas.
Starting point is 01:00:32 Also a lot of stickers and cups. You can also go to Teespring.com slash history hyenas. Slash stores slash history hyenas. Where are these? On YouTube. Is there a link for this? On our YouTube page. It goes directly to the Teespring account.
Starting point is 01:00:46 Teespring.com slash stores slash history hyenas. Go get our t-shirts and our mugs. We have some more coming up. We have Smithtown Water Department. Smithtown Water. Shout out Smithtown Water. We'll have a less anime Q's with smoothies. Less anime Q's with smoothies if Mike can survive the week
Starting point is 01:01:00 and not kill himself because Venetia is shit on his dreams. Venetia just shit on. She goes, did you make that? I'm so sorry, man. I have to be honest, I don't love it. I don't love it and we should love it. Word. Yeah, word. It's not dope.
Starting point is 01:01:15 Frank Rizzo 2020 sticker coming out pretty soon too. Yeah, oh yeah, Frank Rizzo 2020. Yeah, Frank Rizzo 2020. By myself, I'll take his physical. You crumb. You crumb. You crumb. Yeah, so that was Jack the Ripper. All right.
Starting point is 01:01:30 So, yeah, it was Jack the Ripper. Thank you guys so much. We appreciate all the support. I'm going to go suck a dick. Thanks. Bye. Hi, what's up? This is Mike.
Starting point is 01:01:41 How are you doing? This is Mike. This is Mike Modiface from History Hyenas. And we just wanted to see how, if you like these logos that we made for you. This is Mike. How are you doing? This is Mike. This is Mike Modiface from History Hyenas. And we just wanted to see how, if you like these logos that we made for them. And hi, this is Vanitya, the new girl from the History Hyenas, Mad Love, UWS for Life. I'm going to Greece. I just wanted to say, Bailey, thanks so much for your support and service from what you've done so far. Thanks for making posters for Chris and only
Starting point is 01:02:05 charging him like a low amount. We really appreciate it. Word, word. Word, word up. Upper West Side for live, bitch. See you later. And this is Zach Isis. What happened was his train fell down and so I was late and I don't know where my soundboard is. I think it's up my ass or Chris's
Starting point is 01:02:22 ass. Praise be to Allah. This is no dwarf but no eating in my studio. Yeah, and this is Bobby. I think it's up my ass or Chris's ass. Praise be to Allah. This is no dwarf, but no eating in my studio. Yeah, and this is Bobby. I'm fat. She's just going to get what she's going to get. Yeah, she's just going to open up that nest. Listen, you're just going to get what you're going to
Starting point is 01:02:41 get. We're history. Hyenas. We're here for a good time and certainly not a long time. Who's this now? Who's this? Jake Salisbury. Jake Salisbury. Have you realized that you're a blonde and I'm a brunette? Yeah.
Starting point is 01:02:57 And we're two Wikipedia slots? Jake. What's up, man? This is Chris DiStefano from the History Hyenas and Giannis Papas. You got your dick tucked back? Get your chopstick outs And put them in your ass Tuck back your dick
Starting point is 01:03:10 And make it a pussy It's the History Hyenas Jake Oh hey what's up guys Oh wow This kid's a fucking FF What are you doing? You're Franks and Beans What are you doing?
Starting point is 01:03:24 Uh Chilling at work Walking around the warehouse Making it look like I'm doing something Yeah doing? You're Frank's beans. What are you doing? Chilling at work, walk around the warehouse, make it look like I'm doing something. Yeah. Do you ever walk around the warehouse just to spice it up a little bit? You just tuck your dick back and stick a couple of chopsticks up your ass? A little bit every now and then. It is Thursday.
Starting point is 01:03:37 It is Chinese food Thursday. Oh, yeah. That's what it is. So when you go, guys, I want you to call it Eastern Hammy Thursday from now on. All right. Eastern Hemmy Thursday. Sounds good. Yeah.
Starting point is 01:03:48 What state are you from? Ohio. Trump 2020. Are you going Trump this year? Next year? You don't have to answer it. Yeah. Just say it.
Starting point is 01:04:01 I'm not. Yeah. I can't lie to you. You're a fart. He's a mouthful. A little bit. A little bit, though. Yeah, no, I appreciate it. He'm not. I can't lie to you. You're a fucking laughingstock. He's a smart kid. No, we don't go Trump. We don't even tell.
Starting point is 01:04:11 You don't know. We joke around so much, nobody knows what our true political beliefs are. I'm AOC. You're AOC? I'm not even a U.S. citizen. I'm Canadian. Yeah, I'm a Canadian. Justin Trudeau is.
Starting point is 01:04:24 What kind of warehouse do you work at? I work for a hydraulics factory. Nice. You see, we still do make a few things in this country. You're making us proud. Thank you so much. We've reached the Hey Bert time limit. But I just want to say.
Starting point is 01:04:38 Yep. Hey Bert. I just want to say thank you. Quick, if you'd service it, just real quick, me and Yanni like to ask, what's been your favorite part Of the podcast so far? Oh Steelpipe Chrissy
Starting point is 01:04:52 Steelpipe Chrissy You were about to put Mike down and fart And you realized Venetia was here Yeah I just saw that happen We all watched you
Starting point is 01:04:59 Go through the motion He was about to fart To Mike And he realized Oh we got There's a piece in the room. No, I was going to do it, but it crept back up in. Make no mistake, Father Bill's joined the Patreon
Starting point is 01:05:09 so now my ass is just hiding again. Guys, well, why don't you get your chopsticks out and pull it out? Pull it out. Like a piece of sushi. All right, Jake, we got to go. Stay tucked back. Yeah, I love how we just hang up on him. Jake's a good kid. He's an American kid. Yeah, Frank's a beans. 100% he's cross-eyed. I love how we just hang up on him.
Starting point is 01:05:21 Jake's a good kid. He's an American kid. Yeah, Frank's a beans. 100% he's cross-eyed. All right, let's keep calling. Venetia, you can't keep the cookies. I'm going to eat them all. I want to live with your grandmother.
Starting point is 01:05:37 All right. Yeah, yeah. I'll hit her up. Be like, yeah, yeah. Was she born here in Greece? She's born in Sparta. She's born in Sparta. Hello? She's a Greek girl.
Starting point is 01:05:48 Vanity, I have cookies. Bring them for the boys. Bring the cookies for the boys. Let's call Vanity's grandma. Let's call Vanity's brother and brothers and ask them if it's okay if Chrissy takes her to the movies. How about that? Mike Moosh.
Starting point is 01:06:10 Let's call your ex-wife. Hi, you've reached Jillian. I'm unable to get to my phone right now. I'll call you back as soon as I get the message. Thanks. Have a great day. At the tone, please record your message. Yeah, go ahead.
Starting point is 01:06:26 When you have finished recording, you may hang up or press 1 for more options. Hey, how you doing, Julian? Listen, this is Sean Tyree from Loud 14, History Hyena's podcast affiliate. We're a subsidiary of the History Hyenas. I want you to know that, listen, we're at war with that religion. Everybody knows what we're talking about. This is Patrick Mulroney. Colleen Jr., sit down. It's been
Starting point is 01:06:47 4,683 days since 9-11. I just want to say thank you so much for your service. And as best you can, I'm asking all my fellow firefighters if... Hold on one second. Yeah, if you want to... If you don't want
Starting point is 01:07:03 the wall, then you go down on that board and you guard it yourself. You guard it yourself. Ladder 14. Ladder 14. Thank you so much for your service. We gotta go. We got a true FF coming in. Can you guys float? They don't really walk.
Starting point is 01:07:18 They just kinda fucking float. Hey. Who is this? Nick Averilla. Hey Avarillo Who is this? Nick Avarillo Nick Avarillo What's up man It's Chris DiStefano And Giannis Pompas
Starting point is 01:07:31 From the History Hyena What's up What are you doing man You talk back What's up Do you got your dick Tucked between your legs I'm driving around
Starting point is 01:07:40 Oh Where are you driving to Yeah yeah yeah Driving home From uh Just went to Best Buy, buy some shit. What'd you get? What's up? Some electronic, I needed to get an SD card for my camera. You know what I like about Nick?
Starting point is 01:07:55 Nick is a laid back guy. Yeah. You're a laid back kid, Nick. You're a laid back kid, Nick. Thick dick Nick. Yeah, thick dick. Yeah, I'm a young kid, you know. How old are you?
Starting point is 01:08:02 I got no worries. How old are you? 25. Yeah, you're a young kid. you know. How old are you? I got no worries. How old are you? 25. Yeah, you're a young kid. You haven't figured anything out yet in life. Yeah, you and Isis can go hang out at Chuck E. Cheese. You, Isis, and Venetia can go to Chuck E. Cheese. Yep.
Starting point is 01:08:17 If you had a gun to your head and you either had to crack open Zach Isis or Mike Emoji Face, which one would you do? either had to crack open Zach Isis or Mike Emoji Face, which one would you do? I think I'm going to go with Zach because I'm not into the chubby ones. Yeah. Mike's losing weight, though. We've been two hours. He's been staring at a toasted blueberry muffin
Starting point is 01:08:37 with butter. He hasn't even taken a bite. That's pretty good, right? Good shit. Yo, Nicky, what's your favorite moment on the podcast, cuzzy? I've listened to them all and easily the Michelangelo episode was 10 out of 10. Yeah, 10 out of 10. The hijab, the hijab part, man.
Starting point is 01:08:56 Yeah, when Chrissy said that the hijab is the person that gave him the parking ticket and the hijab is what he puts on his head. That was wild. Yeah, that was wild. We got to make that an Instagram clip. That was wild. We gotta make that an Instagram clip. That was wild. Yes, you do. Do you feel like you're a smarter
Starting point is 01:09:12 kid? I mean, no offense, you don't sound like the brightest kid, but now do you feel like because you listen to history hyenas, you can go to a party and be like, guess what? Michelangelo was a gay kid. I'm a smart kid. Yeah, of course. Yeah, right. Of course. I know you guys have been teaching me a little bit of history. Yeah.
Starting point is 01:09:26 Listen, babe, you're at the Hey Bird time limit. So we just we just want to we just want to say thank you so much. And we also just want to ask you real quick. What do I want to ask you? How big is your penis? What kind of piece you got? Yeah. Are you circumcised?
Starting point is 01:09:42 No, I ain't a J.O.O. You ain't a J.O.O You ain't a J-O-O So you got You got a You got a clean piece of beef Or you don't I got I got a
Starting point is 01:09:51 I got a clean Clean uh Seven inch piece Yeah Wow Decent piece Yeah Decent piece
Starting point is 01:09:55 Alright Thanks for the service We'll call you At some point again In your life Love it A clean piece of beef Cuz you just make that up
Starting point is 01:10:04 Yeah Yeah That's a 10 out of 10. Yeah. It's, uh, yeah. What, you got a clean piece of beef? Yeah. Yeah. How many more we got, Mike?
Starting point is 01:10:13 I will do two more. Yeah, let's do two more. Oh, 631, we're calling Long Island. This is out on the island. We're calling out on the island. How you doing? This is Sean Terry for Ladder 14 Listen, when I retire I'm thinking about going to Levittown Is this a real estate office?
Starting point is 01:10:34 Yeah, I need something with an above ground pool Yeah, with a fence facing the interstate There is no interstate because we're out on the island But I need, my backyard there to be a fence on the other side. It's a highway. And I need to be close.
Starting point is 01:10:48 Put me close to a TD Bank drive-thru. Yeah. And I need to be able to get Dunkin' Donuts for the kids. Just for the kids. Yeah. Not for the kids. Yeah. Hi, this is Sarah.
Starting point is 01:10:59 Can I take you to the car? Hey. This is Venetia. What's her name? Sarah Higginmiller hi sarah higginmiller um this is chris di stefano from the history hyenas podcast and i'm with yannis papas hi how you doing sarah and we're just calling you you're from um your last name's hagan miller and i feel like you're a school teacher from long island so i just wanted to call like and sound like one of your um one of your other school teacher friends that probably talks like this yeah um we're going to huntington tonight do you
Starting point is 01:11:33 want to come um there's a few cool bars and we're gonna meet some boys we're gonna meet some boys and yeah and oh my god do you remember like like last year when Rebecca like she accidentally held hands with the black guy? Yeah. And he went to Hofstra and he was on the basketball team. Oh, my God. And like I can't imagine her dad found out. Yeah, right.
Starting point is 01:11:54 Yeah, right. She'd be so in trouble. Thank God we fucking live in. And it's not about that. No, we're smart. We live in Suffolk. We live in Suffolk County. Yeah.
Starting point is 01:12:03 But yeah. Do you want to go to a sushi restaurant that has purple neon lighting? All right. Let me just change just real quick before the voicemail runs out. This is Chris DiStefano and Giannis Pappas. We're obviously just kidding. We're shunning for the black eye comment. And the truth of the situation is I've been masturbating a lot on my love sack to the thought of guys.
Starting point is 01:12:20 And most of them have been black men. Yeah. He's also got a situation with the mother. We love you very much. Thank you for your service. Thank you for listening to History Hyenas, and tell your friends you are a top-level dude. I love cock. Bye. ប្រូវាប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់� Bye.

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