History Hyenas with Chris Distefano and Yannis Pappas - 77 - Aliens are WILD!

Episode Date: June 30, 2019

Yannis talks about Bob Lazar and how aliens do exist! Chris is in London and so bestie Sergio Chicon guesties! The boys get a call from Paul Virzi and talk about his experience with Aliens! WILD!Want ...more Hyena content? Check out www.patreon.com/bayridgeboys where things get really WILD!Follow us!: 🙆🏼‍♂️🐕🙆🏻‍♂️🙆🏼‍♂️Chris Distefano on Instagram, Twitter, website🙆🏻‍♂️Yannis Pappas on Instagram, Twitter, website🐕History Hyenas on Instagram, Twitter, website Subscribe to the poddy woddy on YouTube, iTunes, Spotify, and HH Clips

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Starting point is 00:00:00 What's up, cuzzy wuzzies? You're listening to the Bay Ridge and non-toots alike? Welcome to History Hyena, not Oz. This podcast just got a lot more swarthy, a little less white, because right now I'm looking around and it is full of sand and full of que pasa mi gente. We got a white walker to my left, moving Puerto Ricans across state lines with Sergio Blizzy Chacon. And over to my right, we got the king of the sandbox, Zach Isis. And no Chrissy Chlamydia today. So what's up, guys?
Starting point is 00:01:15 What's up? What's up? Now everyone's got to talk more because we're missing a venereal disease. If a venereal disease was a human, it would be Chrissy DiStefano. What's up, Sergio? Welcome back. I'm feeling great. Thanks for having me again.
Starting point is 00:01:30 Yeah. Can we get his mic on? Yeah. I said, I'm feeling great. Thanks for having me again. And I appreciate you allowing me to use your freezer for my frozen Thor rats. Yeah. I mean, he came in here with frozen rats.
Starting point is 00:01:44 If only the other. My snake's got to eat, baby. Yeah. I mean, he came in here with frozen rats. If only the other... My snake's gotta eat, baby. Yeah. So he came through. He's like, yo, can I put my frozen rats in the freezer? Because he's trying to kill two birds with one stone. He went and picked up the rats from Pet... Where do you get them now? Petland or Petco? Or just from a dude on the corner? Yo, chill.
Starting point is 00:01:59 Don't even talk about Petland. They closed down recently. That breaks my heart. That was my very first job. Y'all know this. I got out of Petco. Do you meet a Chinese guy in the street who has a Chinese restaurant who just is like, look, we have enough for meat. You can use the rest of these for your snakes. Y'all wish I had that snake. If you got that connect, hit me on the hip because I'll take that connect. These rats are expensive.
Starting point is 00:02:22 $15 for a jumbo rat. $15 for a jumbo rat. And that feeds your snake for how many weeks? Well, I like to that connect. These rats are expensive. $15 for a jumbo rat. $15 for a jumbo rat. And that feeds your snake for how many weeks? Well, I like to feed them. How many rats do you have to give your snake to convince the rat not to eat that beautiful, exotic cat that you have walking around? That cat lives in constant fear, Sergio. Yo, cats.
Starting point is 00:02:39 I got two cats. Yo, if you follow, yeah, one of them just hides, though. The other one just hides. Yeah, antisocial. Yeah, you got one cat that's antisocial and the other one that's gorgeous. Yeah, he won't live long, though, because he's a Persian. So, you know, to get this beautiful breed, you got to shrink the nose, blow up the head. He probably has a lifespan of three days.
Starting point is 00:02:55 Three days. And it's probably, yeah, it's only going to be three days because he lives his life in fear. If you go follow Sergio Chacon on Instagram, you can see Sergio Chacon's aquarium in his living room, which also doubles as a boxing gym and a family room. That's a lot going on there, Pop. And occasionally he'll do a character
Starting point is 00:03:14 throw a wig on and do an Instagram video in that same room, drink coffee, drinks a lot of coffee in there as well. But he always takes pictures. He's got a dog in there. He's got 15 snakes. He's got a couple lizards and a family. So if you go to his Instagram following, what is it? At Sergio Chacon?
Starting point is 00:03:30 Yes, sir. At Sergio Chacon. You can see that cat and you can look in that cat's face. That cat has anxiety disorder. Because when the humans are out, it's just him and the snakes. His nose is mad small. It's like the size of my pinky nail. He's a Persian. It's. His nose is mad small. It's like the size of my pinky nail. He's a Persian.
Starting point is 00:03:46 It's ridiculous how they shrink that nose. And he snorts like he had a cocaine problem. He's like... I'm like, yo, you holding out on me, cat? He could just be imitating his owner. Yo, he hears you do that. I don't do that shit out in the open.
Starting point is 00:04:02 I do it in the bathroom, running the water with a little button lock Yo What was the Where did you So did you What website from Florida Did you get the cat from
Starting point is 00:04:10 Or I didn't got How much you pay for that cat No no no I got the cat Liz my wife got the cat From a breeder in the Bronx So she goes to the Bronx
Starting point is 00:04:19 Like Riverdale It's a nice part of the Bronx Right And she meets this woman And this woman has Four Persians They don't lay They don't have big letters, maybe three.
Starting point is 00:04:26 And she says to Liz, she's like, they act up. So if they act up, just whoop them. And Liz is like, what? She's like, yeah, you can whoop them. And that was the advice she gave her for $500 and got the cat and that was it. She bounced. And yo, Liz used all my coins to
Starting point is 00:04:42 buy the cat. Like every time I go home, I throw loose change in, like, a Bustelo jar. So she came with $450, and the last $50 was in quarters? No, it's like $500 in coins. She made it to my daughter, and Charlie carried that shit. Oh, man. Yo, I want to go get the other three, because I feel bad that the other three are with that woman that's whooping the cats. She said, just whoop them.
Starting point is 00:05:02 Yeah. Just slapping cats. That is, yeah, that cats. Just whoop them. Just slapping cats. If you get your cats from somebody in the Bronx, let's just be crystal clear, that woman in the Bronx is not concerned with animal rights. Those are Sarah McLaughlin cats. There'll be a white woman who sees her and be like,
Starting point is 00:05:18 what are you doing with those cats? She's like, shut up. I'm disciplining my cats. That's what I'm doing. I'm from the Bronx. So there's the cat right there on the instagram let's see this video yeah there's sergio's got boxing gloves on and the cat's like look i already live in enough fear from these reptiles now i gotta worry about you punching me look he takes mad shots yeah he's got no defense that's why he has a pug nose that cat is beautiful though But those cats aren't bred to kill mice or anything. They're just bred
Starting point is 00:05:47 to look pretty. He'll fuck a mouse up. He will, right? He's like a bat to fall off. Spike it back. He's lazy. My dog killed a mouse yesterday. That's good. I had a mouse in my apartment. Well, don't say you had a mouse. If you have one, you got a mouse. I had a mouse in my apartment. Well, don't say you had a mouse. If you have one,
Starting point is 00:06:07 you have a bunch. I know that's the problem. You think it's one. It's brutal. That's just the reality of living in New York City. But my wife came home and there was a dead mouse by the water bowl. So he killed my dog, she, Isla, the Puerto Rican dog
Starting point is 00:06:23 killed the mouse. You have a mixed breed, right? Yeah, she's mostly lab, the Puerto Rican dog, killed the mouse. You have a mixed breed, right? Yeah. She's mostly lab, but she's something else. She's got some other things. She's a Puerto Rican street dog that I rescued. You know what I mean? They live a long time.
Starting point is 00:06:34 Yeah. They're durable. Yeah. I like my dogs. Mixed breeds. Yeah. I want urban dogs. I want my dog to be a New Yorker.
Starting point is 00:06:41 I want either a Jewish dog, Italian dog, a Puerto Rican, a black dog. My dog is black. Now, Puerto Rican, a black dog. My dog is black. Now, if my dog was a little white on the chest, a little white. Yeah, a little white. I noticed that. If my dog was a if my dog was an Angela Lazada joke, I would say I got my dog from Puerto Rico. She's a black lab,
Starting point is 00:06:57 which makes her Dominican. Yeah. So me, Sergio and and Angela Lazada. um we went to Miami we had a great time down there that was a time of that was a good fucking time we had a good time only the only problem was that I decided to swing the bat and try to fly uh fly standby that was yo Yanis pulled some dirt back shit so my wife is a flight attendant you know I could get uh buddy passes and it's usually good for me i got a d1 pass you know i'm saying i'm a little ahead of the line janice and angelo got it but this regular buddy passes they missed the first flight
Starting point is 00:07:33 because they weren't paying attention and you know you were just too laxed out you weren't you know they were like group six he was part of group six going over that was on the way down so on the way down going over to miami i had no idea what flying standby is. I've never done it before. It sounded good. I figured I could cut a few corners, save some money. Plus, I didn't book the flights because I'm a fucking dirtbag and I'm very unorganized.
Starting point is 00:07:55 You just gotta be on top of it. When they call the group, you get there. When they call group seven and then they just ripped up his tickets in his face. That was on the way down. Yeah. So this is what happened. So when you fly standby, if you haven't flown standby, you go to the desk with your fucking, your ticket, but it's not even a real ticket.
Starting point is 00:08:11 It's just a waste of paper is what it is. It was a real ticket. You just didn't go. But no, they give you that first ticket that you have. It was a boarding pass. Yeah, see? No, no, no. But first they give you the boarding passes.
Starting point is 00:08:21 It's just a waste of paper. And then you go hand it to the person at the desk and then they take that, rip it up and give you your boarding pass is just a waste of paper. And then you go hand it to the person at the desk, and then they take that, rip it up, and give you your boarding pass. So we did that. We took that waste of paper, went and got our boarding pass, group six, and then we got a little cocky. That's when we got cocky. We were acting like we had first class tickets, and we just went over and sat down in the waiting area and started talking like we were in first class. So they call group six. We missed it.
Starting point is 00:08:47 So then, and Sergio was like, yo, you guys should be paying attention. You group sick. Cause he's good. He's a level one. I learned everything about fucking standby level one.
Starting point is 00:08:55 That's like a husband or wife of the flight attendant. You get special treatment. We we're like level three. We're just fucking, we're like friends of the, of the husband or we're like the lowest level of people on standby. Yeah. We're like level three. We're just fucking, we're like friends of the husband. We're like the lowest level of people on standby. Bottom tree to shit.
Starting point is 00:09:08 I think they even put the dogs in the crate underneath the plane above us on standby. So Sergio was like, you guys should, you know, we were just talking, laughing, and Sergio was like, you guys should be paying attention, man. They may call your group because they already started boarding. So me and Angelo came up and we looked at we looked at tickets group six and then we heard we heard
Starting point is 00:09:27 them called group seven and we're like oh so we tried to cut the front of the line a couple people like what the fuck you doing we're like group six you know we're good cocky like we have like we have real tickets and we found out real real quick that we were being too cocky yeah this is one of that same c-shirt because i remember the stain on the left armpit. Matt High, dirty. You know what I'm saying? Yankee fitted, Matt High. One little bag with a sock popping out of it. Arrogant.
Starting point is 00:09:54 That's my summer style, right? White t-shirt, pit tans. The white t-shirt's a little too small so the guts hang it over a little bit. You can see it. I'm not in white t-shirt shape, but I act like I am in white t-shirt shape. You're in white t-shirt shape, but I act like I am in white t-shirt shape. You're in white t-shirt shape, but you always wear black.
Starting point is 00:10:10 Yeah, yeah, because I don't like the armpit stains anymore, man. That shit annoys me. So anyway, we get up to the flight attendant. What do you call those? What are they? Attendants? They don't get on the plane. They're just attendants. The gate agent. Gate agent.
Starting point is 00:10:26 Gate agent. So we get up to the gate agent and she looks at her tickets and she goes, she goes, oh wait, no. And she just goes like this and rips them. She went high too. She could have ripped it down here. She put it up to her eye level. Above her head. And she ripped it. She was flustered
Starting point is 00:10:42 because there was a flat that was canceled and mad people were coming in. So she was like they had they were stressed the fuck out. Yo, Isis, can I get water? Can I get another water? I mean, it's 88 degrees and I need water. Would you like water? I got a water.
Starting point is 00:10:56 Yeah. Give me one of those Smithtown waters. Oh, no. Is there anyone in the refrigerator? I would like one in the refrigerator. Sean, Terry, can I get one of that? Let me get one of those waters from the refrigerator. Yeah. Thank you, Isis. There me get one of those waters from the refrigerator. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:11:06 Thank you, Isis. Thank you. Appreciate it. So, yeah. So then they ripped it up and she told the other flush it because the fucking some flights were canceled. No, some other flights were canceled. And if that happens, they push everyone on those flights on your flight. So we got pushed back and she was like, just wait
Starting point is 00:11:22 over there. We're going to try to get you on. And then we didn't fucking get on. But then we got on the next plane so it wasn't bad now here's the thing Angelo he's a good friend he's a little he's going through some health problems so Sergio said to me on the way down he's like yo Pa you sure you want to do this standby? Yo I told
Starting point is 00:11:38 Deani I was like yo dawg we could go on standby do the buddy pass thing but let's get a ticket for our boy he's not feeling great yeah yo he just ignored me he just sat on the text for like 24 but let's get a ticket for our boy. He's not feeling great. Yeah. You know, he just ignored me. He just sat on the text for like 24 hours. And then we were talking to group text and he's got mad jokes about everything.
Starting point is 00:11:54 But he's addressing every other issue on planet Earth. But the ticket situation. Yeah. Except my responsibilities. I'm talking about everything except what I should be responsible for. And you're talking about everything else in debt. Yeah. Like, you know, like you have knowledge about the shit you're talking about. Like, what about these tickets that, you know, to Miami
Starting point is 00:12:08 for these two shows? He didn't even know that there was only two shows. He's asking me, he's like, how many shows we got? He's like, yo, more of me is there too? I thought we did two shows tonight. Like, you had no idea. You don't care. I know. When did I stop caring? Yo. Yo, it's a lot different flying with
Starting point is 00:12:24 Chrissy because Chrissy's organized, right? He knows everything. Chrissy's organized. He sent me my itinerary. I make you make all the decisions when you fly with me. I'm like, yo, tell me where we need to be. I was a jock. I was like, I do an administrative work for this motherfucker.
Starting point is 00:12:36 Yeah, I had to ask them what time the show's at. Which is my pleasure. It was all good. Yeah, we had a great time. So what happened with Angelo? So, yeah, Angelo's not feeling well. So Sergio, what Sergio said was right. He warned me. He warned me. Look, I'm a guy who take
Starting point is 00:12:47 home run swings. That's what I do. I'm like, in comedy, I'm like Jose Canseco minus the steroids. I don't do any cycle. But I'm a guy who go up there You don't do one straw like Chrissy? I don't know. Yo, is that true that Chrissy didn't really
Starting point is 00:13:03 do a cycle? he did do a cycle yeah he did because when I first met him we talked about this he was huge big shoulders like a football player
Starting point is 00:13:09 yeah he did do a cycle that's hilarious that he talks about yeah he also he also pretended like he was Italian for the first four years of his fucking career
Starting point is 00:13:17 I think because I think the Jersey Shore was big back then so he was like he's just riding that wave because he's Chrissy fucking true blue psychopath.
Starting point is 00:13:26 Chrissy got a big head. Chrissy got a fucking helmet head. If you haven't seen Chrissy in person, it's a strikingly big head. From every side, it's huge. It's like a golden retriever hybrid head. Because it's like blonde and it's big and the front is always wet.
Starting point is 00:13:42 It stands out. It stands out. Like a college mascot. Yeah, yeah. He looks like he's a college mascot who took the suit off but left the head on. He looks like a fucking lollipop. Yeah, he's got a big
Starting point is 00:13:56 He's got a big butt too. Yeah, he's got It's like a buxom. I call him Fred Flintstone. He looks like he's shaped like Fred Flintstone. He's got big hips. He's got b buxom. Yeah. That's why they call him a buxom. I call him Fred Flintstone. He looks like he's shaped like Fred Flintstone. I mean, he got big hips. He got bachata hips. Like, if he know how to dance bachata,
Starting point is 00:14:12 but then he'll kill it, because they're very like... Yeah. He's a guy who needs to really... If he doesn't keep throwing hands and staying in shape, he's going to blow out. He's trimming down nicely, though.
Starting point is 00:14:22 But the head ain't going to trim down. No. It's going to be a big fucking skull. Yeah, that's why I tried. We were walking once and I told him, I was like, you look good in that suit, but you know, you're losing a lot of weight. It's starting to accentuate how big your head is. And he's starting to get mad for a sec.
Starting point is 00:14:32 I said, listen, you got a big head. There's nothing you can do about it. Because somebody, one of our fans wrote on the Patreon board, they wrote, they said, Chrissy, that suit looks good. But he said, make no mistake, your 40% body, 60% head. Now, I told the fans that
Starting point is 00:14:51 we were going to have you back. The fans love you, bro. Oh, they love you. Make no mistake, this little nose used to be naughty. It's a little nose. It's a cute nose. My mother loves this stuff. You got a naughty nose. Bad naughty. a little nose and it's a cute nose my mother loves this you got a naughty nose a bad naughty yeah
Starting point is 00:15:06 this little nose seen a lot of handicapped bathroom stalls it's a naughty little nose and it's a boxy nose I never got hit in my nose I'm evasive like a mongoose yeah you are
Starting point is 00:15:17 you got good defensive skill because you got short arms you better have good defense you got to stay on the inside you've done a lot of blizzies you've also punched a few drug deals in the stomach. Hopefully they don't listen to the podcast. Yeah, but yeah.
Starting point is 00:15:30 But we, you're out there, Mike. Now he's kind of like, Serge is like our honorary Bay Ridge boy because we can't have Hey Bert on the podcast anymore because everyone feels like he's being Bert. As you do it. because hey burt feels like he's burt they had hey burt tattooed at skank fest i saw it i we can't i'm sorry james madden i'm look i know i can't we can't control a fan it's a runaway trade at this point they had a fucking
Starting point is 00:16:02 hey burt they had his head in a burt thing as a tattoo do you have a picture of it? Show Sergio a picture of it. That's awesome, man. Yeah. So we got some comments. I told the fans that Sergio was going to be on today and it said
Starting point is 00:16:21 one of our fans Kevin Bentz wants to know how does Deez piece feel in his little hands? He wants to know how you jerk it off. Do you jerk off the hand with the little finger? Hell no. You use the other finger. That shit's awkward. I don't got the same grip, so it's lefty now, baby.
Starting point is 00:16:39 But you're righty, though. Yeah. You're righty. So you used to jerk off with that hand. Hell yeah. And then you got the little finger, and it felt a little awkward, like it was tickling it. It felt awkwardy. So you used to jerk off with that hand. Hell yeah. And then you got the little finger and it felt a little awkward like it was tickling it.
Starting point is 00:16:47 It felt awkward. It just felt like you can't get that grip. So I go left. You're a switch hitter. Yeah, I go left. You're somebody who, you're like a boxer who figured out if he went southpaw.
Starting point is 00:16:56 I had to go southpaw on it. Yeah. So he jerks off southpaw. Because if I did with my right, it's just his fingers distracting. It's just like. Yo, that finger looks like a baby cobra. It's like a chorizo.
Starting point is 00:17:08 Yeah, that's Sergio's bit. Like a Vienna sausage. Somebody else said... He wants to know... Johnny Coppersnake wants to know which one of us say, yeah, I mean better. So he wants to hear, yeah, I mean.
Starting point is 00:17:21 Yeah, I mean. Yeah, obviously Sergio's better. Yeah, I mean. That's pretty good too. How about yours, Isis? yours isis yeah i mean yeah because here's the thing oh yeah you sound good yeah isis here's the thing isis is a great rapper he's really he's hip what you got a new album everybody's gotta go check it out follow you on soundcloud right spotify soundcloud z the dropout everywhere z the dropout the music is fucking great which by the way yeah i just listened to a track that shit was banging like the evolution of the beat like the everywhere. Z the Dropout. The music's fucking great. Which, by the way, I just listened to a track.
Starting point is 00:17:45 That shit was banging. I liked the evolution of the beat. The lyrics were tight. The hook was dope. That was a dope track. Yeah, he's got good lyrics. And I'm a hip-hop enthusiast. Yeah, but you know what?
Starting point is 00:17:54 He grew up at a time where, you know what I mean? He doesn't say, yeah, I mean that much, because he went to LaGuardia, and he went to a school where he just danced and twirled around. So he's of that Kanye. You don't have to have any street cred to be a rapper nowadays. just dance and twirl around. So he's more, he's of that Kanye, you know, he doesn't,
Starting point is 00:18:07 you don't have to have any street cred to be a rapper nowadays. All you got to do is just fucking, you know, have, have skills, which is better. Don't you think it's better? A face tattoo doesn't hurt.
Starting point is 00:18:14 Yeah, he's got tattoos and fingers, but we grew up in a New York that was a little more stressful. I don't miss it. I don't miss it. For sure. All right.
Starting point is 00:18:21 And he has Latin Kings, Decepticons. Those are all gang members that ran the streets. Yeah, it was not a fun time. decepticons those are all gang members that ran the streets yeah it was not a fun time septicons yeah called decepts and they were known for slashing in your face that was what they did and then the bloods took over that you know yeah and then there was a low lives and they used to wear polo so they would go in like 50 into a store and just fucking steal all the polo and they used to roll around all they wore was polo
Starting point is 00:18:43 there's low lives decepticons and there was Autobots was another was another they were like in Crown Heights and then you had like block crews too you know what I'm saying what acronyms like it'd be like SOB FOS flip out squad sons of bitches like there was a bunch of block crews that you had like I still see a lot
Starting point is 00:19:00 of that by like me like GMB like all that kind of stuff yeah that's still heavy yeah well it's not as bad as it wasn't. Hopefully it never goes back to that. That was traumatizing. I can't think of the body. Yeah, it really makes me uncomfortable. When we went to Syracuse, we were talking about in the car, it started to make, I started to feel
Starting point is 00:19:16 that anxiety I had as a kid because you had to constantly be thinking like, it's almost like being a gazelle or an impala on the Serengeti yeah you're constantly worrying and looking over your shoulder because there's predators everywhere defense mechanism so i still every time i seen a cruel kids i will cross the street and pretend i was looking up at a window like you know like and i would squirt my eyes yeah so like not to face the
Starting point is 00:19:41 reality of a group of mob of kids coming towards me. So I would squint my eyes. I'd pretend I was tying my shoelace. And I was wearing sandals. For real. Like I knew a bunch of different ways. Sometimes I would go up to the kid who was like staring me down and ask him a question. Like, you know what 4th Street is that? And they'd be like, what?
Starting point is 00:20:01 Like just throw them off and just like walk quickly the other way. Yeah, that's smart. Be preemptive. Distract them. Yeah. Have my little tricks. What was that one time you saw that guy and he said, yo, stop looking at me like shit is sweet. And then you stumbled? Junior high school. Yeah. What happened? This kid named
Starting point is 00:20:16 Kassim. He's from the hill. So I'm from what they consider that like the Ave, like Alphabet City. Yeah. And these kids were from the hill. That's about like Wadi of Projects on the Lower East Side. Both was bad back in the Alphabet City. Yeah. And these kids were from the Hill. That's about like a lot of your projects on the Lower East Side. Both was bad back in the day. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:20:29 I mean, it's just always Lower East Side, it's like a body of projects all by the water. Yeah. I was on 3rd Street. I was living on 3rd Street at the time.
Starting point is 00:20:36 Went to school in junior high school, 56. You essentially grew up in like the project, but now that shit is mad expensive. Yeah. Yeah. It's changed. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:20:43 The projects are still the projects. I mean, I think they got a little better. Yeah. But even still, it's changed. The projects are still the projects. I mean, I think they got a little better. Yeah, but even still, it's still like you can be walking around and they'd be like, Hi, Sergio. Hi. Yeah, I just saw your mother at the Bordega.
Starting point is 00:20:55 Yeah, we were getting some avocados because we're having a big Lebowski party upstairs. And I said to Mr. Ramirez, Mr. Ramirez, how come the eggs have an expiration date 2014? He said, nobody buys eggs here. Anyway, sorry. That's where we're at. I want to do a little
Starting point is 00:21:12 character piece, ladder 14. So this kid named Kassin, I just made eye contact with him for like a second. And he was like, yo, why you keep on looking at me like shit is sweet? And yo, I just walked away. I remember I was dressed up like one of the members of Woo Cycle had armor feet, gloves,
Starting point is 00:21:28 army hat. And I just walked away. He was like, yeah, you ain't no soldier, you ain't no robot, this life shit is sweet around here. And I just like walked away. And everyone was looking at me like, oh fuck. Did you stumble? You like tripped on your feet? Oh God. That's like self-conscious walk when you walk away?
Starting point is 00:21:43 Yeah, yeah. Like everything with my mouth was wrong. I was like... Yeah. You know, like, you can't control it. And, like, 3 o'clock hit. I was just scared to death that that dude was gonna be waiting for me. I remember I got robbed once. I got robbed once in New York City, and it was the most emasculating rob, because it was one-on-one.
Starting point is 00:21:59 It was me and him. That's how you, like... That still bothers me to this day. Like, he took my entire I was a kid, so I didn't have a manhood yet. I was like 16 or 15, but it's still like... You should have been mad enough! He'd be generous!
Starting point is 00:22:16 So first he was following me, right? I remember I was like, I was coming home after school and he was following me. How much older was he? He, I don't know. He's probably in his 20s. You know how these fucking dirtbags are. Fucking dirtbags. And the thing is, that jump, that's considerably older in terms of like how you build, how you see the world.
Starting point is 00:22:33 Like 16, even if he was just 20 years old, that four year difference is huge. Oh, hell yeah. The one year difference is big back then when you 16 to 15, 15 to 14. Right, right, right. So I knew he was following me and whatnot. And he, and so I dipped into a neighbor's house. Like I went into a neighbor's house.
Starting point is 00:22:50 That was your defense mechanism. Just hide in the hole. Cause I was trying to say like, Oh, if he thinks I'm home, he'll just go. So I went there and I should have just stayed, but like I went and like,
Starting point is 00:23:01 then I felt like, Oh shit. If he comes in here, I'm cornered here. I don't know what I was thinking, but then I left and he didn't, comes in here I'm cornered here I don't know what I was thinking but then I left and he didn't he started to go away he was starting to leave and then he saw me come out
Starting point is 00:23:10 fuck you were like a gopher in a hole that pops out so quick it was like the rattlesnake that was like oh yes exactly and then I started walking home and he just caught up to me and he was like it's my he pulled that shit hey man it's my birthday
Starting point is 00:23:25 you know he robbed me he was like a stick-up kid with some charm yeah he had a little charm he did it real calmly he was like it's my birthday you know but he was basically just saying like he was gonna take my leather jacket for his birthday and he gave me his shitty ass old jacket that he was wearing so he took his he gave me his like fucking like sweatshirt fucking filings basement like little jacket like you're trying to like it what's the trade what happened you looked at it like maybe this is a good trade because you're trying to convince yourself that you're okay with this yeah this was an okay thing it was a good trade but yeah he basically forced this trade where he took my leather jacket i had a brown leather jacket and he took my he took he
Starting point is 00:24:04 gave me his sweatshirt and his fucking Walkman, some old shitty Walkman. So I went in the house with a Walkman and it was just emasculating. And that was it. And I just got robbed. It was right in front of my house. Not only with the memory, but physical material. Like this is what I got. Exactly. I used to look at the Walkman.
Starting point is 00:24:20 I kept the Walkman for a little while. Yeah, because you were trying to convince yourself that you liked that Walkman. I tried to use it once or twice. And they're like, you know what? This was a valuable, even trade. Like, I would have done it anyway. And then you have a fast forward and rewind. This fast forward, you had to flip the tape.
Starting point is 00:24:32 It didn't even work. It didn't even work. It was the most emasculating. And I got robbed plenty of times. You know what I mean? Usually it was like you get jumped by a lot of kids if you had a hat on or a jacket. And you turned a corner. That's what it was, man.
Starting point is 00:24:45 Your hat, sneakers and jackets were always getting took. They were always you just getting got for that shit. Got for that shit. I have a joke about it on my new special, which is available for the non-toots only right now. It's not out anywhere else. Go to Patreon.com slash Bay Ridge Boys and you can see blowing the light. My new specialist up there. So check it.
Starting point is 00:25:06 I got a joke about that on there. So anyway, here's some, here's some new ones. Um, I used to wake up some nights with a little glue. My breeze, you think it was,
Starting point is 00:25:14 so I used to, this kid must know we're talking about aliens today. Wow. He goes, I used to wake up with, I used to wake up fresh. Young dude says I used to wake up some nights with a little glue in my briefs. You think it was aliens
Starting point is 00:25:26 cuz those cuz our fans are 10 out of 10 he goes who hits harder oh this is a good one who's this is a good one spider Gandhi spider Gandhi wants to know who hits harder Phillips head Pappas or Chrissy conundrums Chrissy
Starting point is 00:25:44 probably hits harder well when we were uh training we were just more working out for him but i have to say obviously don't hit hard because you were fucking you weren't even using mitts you were using your bare hands because you were this that's the thing man this guy's thing is about hitting hard i you know if you got speed you could be anybody i don't know who hits harder between both of you because i never i definitely got speed i'm quick i mean i'm Well, you were getting it really fast. Yeah. Cause I think,
Starting point is 00:26:06 you know, because I'm a natural athlete, you know what I'm saying? So I said, I told Chrissy, you told me I was natural. He said, he told me that too.
Starting point is 00:26:13 He's fucking lying to you. He said, if you get into, you're going to get stretched out. Yo, you step with the punches. You know what I'm saying? You,
Starting point is 00:26:23 you were pivoting. Yeah. We had to get the right left thing. Cause you, you? You were pivoting. Yeah. We had to get the right-left thing because you thought you were southpaw. Yeah, I am naturally a southpaw, I think, probably. But you know what? But I was very impressed by it. You know what I'm saying? I thought you were, you know, like, you kept your hands up.
Starting point is 00:26:35 You're so good at it. You trained Venetia, too. Yeah. The thing is, like, some people just don't get, like, keep your hands up. They'll go like this. I'm like, no, not like you're being chased by the cops motherfuckers like right here like you're fighting but that's because you train like a lot of
Starting point is 00:26:50 you train like a lot of white girls who are like just like they must love you too because you're funny and shit some of my nasty videos though people still do that same pose it's weird I'm like bend your knees and they're like but that's not often
Starting point is 00:27:07 but sometimes you get that you and Chris were not that you guys played ball you got a good understanding of your body awareness you got to connect downstairs or upstairs it's so hard though it's like a dance it's so different when you see somebody
Starting point is 00:27:22 because I always love boxing and by the way if you live in New york city yo you probably you probably don't even have time to train more people you're so popular you don't got yo we're gonna open a gym i want to invest money in a gym that would be dope i told chris too like yo if we become rich and famous we should open a fucking gym as sergio is the trainer, makes some money. I'm fucking screwed and I'm thinking about all types of business right now. This podcast is fucking moving right now. What are
Starting point is 00:27:52 we up to? 700 again? We're back up to 700. So that little Patreon holocaust we had, we dropped about 60 with Chrissy had a little situation with the mother. It took a little dip. We took a big dip and now we're back 700 we got a full team we're fucking screwed
Starting point is 00:28:08 in do you want to explain real quick what we're doing the $25 now you do it I don't explain I don't know we're doing one phone call now from now on we can't do a phone call a month because it's too many of you we don't want to make you mad we want to give you what you deserve yes we just can't
Starting point is 00:28:23 we don't want to give you a 10 second phone call hey what's up and hang up so we want to make you mad. We want to give you what you deserve. Yes. We just can't. We don't want to give you a 10 second phone call where it's going to, Hey, what's up and hang up. So we want to give you more content along with one phone call and we'll call some people. You get one phone call and you get an autograph nude from Mike emoji face. That's the new $25 level and the fucking nude. You get a nude and we put an emoji over his face and he signs it.
Starting point is 00:28:43 And that's what it is. Over my dog. That's what it is. So we get one call. Yeah. Well, we could call you back anytime because people love the phone calls. So we could call you if we're in the mood. We're just going to randomly call people.
Starting point is 00:28:54 But you get one phone call. But here's what you do get with the twenty five dollars. You get to fucking go to Sergio's house and pet his snakes. No, you get to feed them one rat. Yeah, you get to feed him a dead rat. I can't believe this frozen dead rat in that little mini fridge, Serge. I stacked it up tightly, too. I saw Zach get the water and I saw the rats on top.
Starting point is 00:29:17 Yo, you know how there's a rule in the studio right now that you can't eat in the studio? Now, because of surgery, there's going to be a new rule. You can't bring any dead mice and put them in the freezer. Rats. They're real rats. He got New York City rats in there. No dead animals in the studio. No dead animals in the fucking freezer or the studio. I wasn't going to say anything, but I was like, it might be an issue
Starting point is 00:29:31 if someone goes in there and they see. Yeah, they see some dead rats. I have a good wife. She allows that shit. You got a great wife. You got your life together. You're kind of like my life idol. I told you that before. Sergio used to have a real problem with the Blizzy and when it comes to comedy
Starting point is 00:29:48 he's one of the funniest guys around but he's an underachiever! He doesn't want some balls! I'm not fidgety! I need like five hours of preparation! Yo, let me tell you something. Even with this podcast alone, he's so laxed out. He said, Saturday, you want to come through?
Starting point is 00:30:06 I was like, yeah He said, I'll confirm with you tomorrow He never confirms, I'd send him a text Six hours later, that's a long fucking time Yep He's like, yeah And then like every text today I was like, alright, 2pm
Starting point is 00:30:23 What are we talking about? It was like 20 minute intervals. Like it's like, you know, it's like a whole episode of a fucking show, a sitcom. It's like he's watching a sitcom. Then answering my text like dirtbag. And it's like, it's real. DBS preparation, Bob. And that's the way you were with the trips to Miami.
Starting point is 00:30:41 Everything was like four days later. Takes him a whole week to get back to you. Yeah, exactly. Yeah, but I'm flying by the seat of my pants, but we have fun, though. Yeah, we have math fun. So we have to finish what they have for $25. We never actually said it. Yeah, we all over the place.
Starting point is 00:30:57 And then I want to I want to read Serge's text because, yo, Serge is mad. Serge is like a new boxer who doesn't want to get hit in the face. He's mad hesitant and he treats everything. He treated this fucking, he treated this episode like it's a test. He's like, yo, he tried to get out of it. He didn't want to try to get out of it. He tried to get out of it. He had a note from his mom.
Starting point is 00:31:16 He was like, yo, pop. He goes, yo, he tried to get a note from his mom. He's like, yo, pop, I don't know anything about aliens. Maybe you want to do this one by yourself. Darryl, seriously. I'm going to read it back. Maybe you want to do this one by yourself. That was seriously. I'm going to read it back. But this is what you get for $25. Listen, we're fucking screwed in fucking kids.
Starting point is 00:31:32 We're fucking screwed in. Listen, we this is what we did. We have the $25 member. You get one phone call, like I said, and then you get exclusive $25 content. We're making content exclusively for our $25 members. If you don't know, ask a $25 member. You're going to get the uncackled version of shit. You know, Chrissy goes wild.
Starting point is 00:31:55 We cackle a lot. The $25 members are going to get the uncackled versions of what he said. And also content specifically made for the $25 members. So it's fucking wild. $10 members. Always. You get the videos of the podcast. That's the staple of the $10 member.
Starting point is 00:32:12 You get videos. You get the walk and talks. Those are only available for the $10 members. The last walk and talk set the fucking Patreon community board on fire. We went wild. So and you also get a lot of 14. board on fire. We went wild. And you also get Ladder 14. You get Ladder 14
Starting point is 00:32:25 with Sean Terry and Patty Mulroney with his wife Colleen Colleen Jr. So they're two firefighters. They have a podcast. They do solo podcasts and they still haven't done their combo podcast, but that's going to happen soon. As soon as Sean Terry and Patty Mulroney get together.
Starting point is 00:32:41 So that's for the $10, right? Ladder 14. A couple firefighters. Trump 2020. Ladoney get together so that's for the ten dollars right a lot of 14 uh a couple firefighters trump 2020 a lot of 14 so that's what you get for the 10 am i missing anything on the 10 oh no that's it and then the five uh oh and the 10 gets the interview episodes before they're released yeah they get all the videos of the regular podcast yeah and the videos i already said that but zach just started paying attention so we you get the videos, but that's another one. You get the fucking interviews before we released them. And we released them much later.
Starting point is 00:33:09 You know, they get on YouTube or whatever. Yeah, YouTube is a month later or more. Yeah. So we got to say, and you also get fucking ISIS's new fucking beats or whatever bars he's dropping. We'll throw that on the Patreon because we're fucking screwed. And you got my specials up there. I illegally put my half hour. I shouldn't say that because Comedy Central listens
Starting point is 00:33:26 to this podcast. I just heard today that a lot of executives listening and well, listen, tackle that out. Cackle that part out. We're going to have to tackle that out, but just fucking leave it in. Listen, my half hour Comedy Central special is up there illegally for the Patriot members. So go
Starting point is 00:33:42 watch it before they take it down. So that's up there from 2014 and my new hour specials up for all the patreon members right now before it's released to anyone patreon.com slash bayridge boys that's the five dollar and the five dollar members is and that's our basic member they just get the bonus podcast and we do one bonus podcast that the five dollar members get and also of course the ten dollars and 25250 and $500 get all that stuff as well. $250, that's for artists. That's our new one.
Starting point is 00:34:08 We're supporting artists. If you're a musician, we're about to make Zach Isis join at the $250. Me and Chris are not going to post his songs on our fucking stories anymore unless Zach Isis fucking goes to the caliphate and raises $250 drachmas or whatever your fucking Arab money is and puts it in our Patreon to play your fucking songs. So if you're a musician, we want to support artists. If you're a comic
Starting point is 00:34:32 Vaduro Rajpaska he's a comedian in Berlin. He's got the Anything Goes podcast live from the sandbox.com. Boom you like how seamless that was? Done with that one. He got in at the $100 member. He got in at the hundred dollar level. From now on, guys like him are going to 50. We're going to 50.
Starting point is 00:34:51 A lot of 14. So 250, if you're an artist, that's a two hundred dollar fifty two hundred fifty dollar level. And then a five hundred dollar level is for small businesses. So now if you're a small business sponsor, call us up. I mean, I call us up i mean not call us up join at our 500 level because make no mistake this podcast is getting huge and so it's good for you you will get a lot of um eyeballs or ears on your company like 9th street auto collision they are located at 133 west hills road out there in huntington station new york you ever notice when chrissy's here and we do the reads he gets really fucking impatient as if like these people aren't giving us money.
Starting point is 00:35:29 Chrissy, if you're fucking listening to this podcast on your flight home from London, we have to do these reads. These people are fucking paying us. So Ninth Street Auto Collision, you can call them at 631-351-5300. They're out there in the island, Huntington. They will crack open your car and clean it out they do oil changes they take all types of insurance give them a fucking call our next sponsor CBD script that's
Starting point is 00:35:52 CBD script dot com correct yes and the promo code is hyenas 15 to give 15% off your total order they fucking they do they do CBD oil and it's got no fumes. They got gummies, edibles, all that shit.
Starting point is 00:36:08 Their stuff's got no fumes. So promo code Hyena's 15 CBD script dot com. Also, nutrition made fun. This kid is wild. He just lost his job. So he let us all know on the Patreon. So he's probably not going to be a small business sponsor for that much longer. But you know what? If
Starting point is 00:36:24 you leave Matt Koch, you're not getting back in because the $100 level is closed. So you better just ask your mother for that $100 until you get a new job. Nutrition made fun. Follow him on Instagram. I don't know what his website is. Does he have a website? I don't know. Nutrition made fun.
Starting point is 00:36:43 This kid is a nutritionist. I follow him on Instagram. I'm already starting to take his tips. He already bought our other sponsor's product, Lakeside Maple, and he's throwing it in his fucking in his yogurt and all that. So follow him. Nutrition Made Fun. Matt
Starting point is 00:36:58 Koch on the gram. And he enroll in his program. It opens July 15th. He has a link right there in his program. It opens July 15th. He has a link right there in his bio. So sign up. And seriously, man, it sounds like he really has some tips and can help you get healthy. And since this podcast is popular in America, we know there's a lot of people who are a little overweight that could use it.
Starting point is 00:37:18 So check them out. And of course, Lakeside Maple, who made that funny video we posted on the gram. He was trying to show us that he was in his mother's basement. But you know what? He had a legit fucking factory over there. So stop playing Lakeside Maple, who made that funny video we posted on the gram. He was trying to show us that he was in his mother's basement. But you know what? He had a legit fucking factory over there. So stop playing Lakeside Maple. We're about to fucking cancel you and make you do 500. So Lakeside Maple, it's trail mix.
Starting point is 00:37:36 It's delicious, man. They got three flavors, original ginger, chai and spicy. And it's just an awesome idea. He's doing well. He's in supermarkets. Lakeside Maple. Go to their website, lakesidemaple.com. Order it.
Starting point is 00:37:49 Can you fans go support our sponsors, please? So they keep advertising with us, too. And plus, we want to support them. This kid's got a great fucking idea. Go buy his shit. Lakesidemaple.com. Wild at the checkout is the promo code for 15 percent of your offer. Go get yourself that trail mix, throw it in your yogurt, throw it in your fucking oatmeal, whatever you want.
Starting point is 00:38:10 And who else did I miss? Oh, a happy, healthy smile and cosmetic dentistry. That's a happy that is a healthy, happy smile dot com. Follow him on Instagram. A healthy smile. Rock Hill. They're down there in Rock Hill, South Carolina. You know who it is. Dr. Harvey
Starting point is 00:38:28 Spencer Jr. He will fucking crack open your teeth and clean them out. So thank you guys for being our sponsors and you're fucking lucky that you're our sponsors because you know what? You're getting a deal and we will we will honor that deal for as long as you want. But make no mistake. Any new sponsors? 500 bucks
Starting point is 00:38:43 because we're screwed in kids. Yeah. Okay. So today we are talking about, we're talking about ladder 14. No, we're talking about area 51. So we're talking about Bob Lazar. Wow. This documentary, he was on Rogan.
Starting point is 00:38:57 And I want to start talking about aliens by calling my good friend, Paul Verzi, hilarious comedian, Paul Verzi. So can we call him? Because his father, his father said he saw a UFO and the story's hilarious. You got his number all up right there? I have it on my phone though. Okay. So let's call Paul Verzi. This comedian Paul Verzi. He's got a special out on Comedy Central.
Starting point is 00:39:16 And now I'm interested in seeing where his father looks like because everybody who believes or sees UFOs, they look like Randy Johnson. Right? And the woman looked like a seamstress that worked at a prison. Yo! Yeah, yeah. Just call him. He knows.
Starting point is 00:39:32 Lot of 14. So, Serge is bringing heat today. You feel good? You relax now. I told you it wasn't going to be that hard. Oh, I wanted to... I'll get back to what Serge's message is later. What Serge was telling me. It was funny. This guy's trying to knock down my confidence. Yeah, so we're calling Paul Verzi.
Starting point is 00:39:51 Check out his special on Comedy Central app. It's an hour special that just came out. And he's got his podcast, The Verzi Effect. Come on, pick up. I mean seriously yeah I'm texting
Starting point is 00:40:10 right now so his podcast is called the Verzi Effect and he's got a one hour special on Comedy Central that came out I think it came out like eight months ago so let's try them again did you guys any of you guys see the documentary eight months ago. So let's try them again.
Starting point is 00:40:27 Did any of you guys see the documentary? Yeah, I mean, we got Franks and Beans over here trying to make a phone call. So we're figuring it out. What happened with smart cups? Did they send money? Let's call Paul Verzi. Paul Verzi. You guys believe in aliens?
Starting point is 00:41:01 Hello. What's up, Paul Verzi? Welcome to the History Hyenas podcast. This is your good friend, Yanny. Yanny, Papi, what's up, brother? What's up, man? Sergio Chacon's with us, too. Paul, what's up, buddy? I'm chilling, man. How you doing? Good, good. Yo, so we just started off talking about what we're talking about today. Have you seen the documentary on Netflix about Bob Lazar? I did not see it in its entirety, but I know what it's about. I talking about today. Have you seen the documentary on Netflix about Bob Lazar? I did not see it in its entirety,
Starting point is 00:41:28 but I know what it's about. I know about it. Yeah. Do you believe in aliens? 100%. 100? It's not even a question to me. Why?
Starting point is 00:41:40 Just because, you know, I'm into it and I've read and watched a bunch of stuff on it. And also, you know, I'm into it and I've read and watched a bunch of stuff on it. And also, you know, you know, the story about my dad in Yonkers in 1973. And for my dad, who is just, you know, somebody that if you ever met him in a million years would never, ever. As a matter of fact, he looked at people like that, like they were crazy. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:42:01 Your dad, he's an Italian. He's a Sicilian Italian kid from the Bronx. He's so overly, you dad, he's an Italian. He's a Sicilian-Italian kid from the Bronx. He's so overly, you know, anything you think of an overly Sicilian, you know, hairy chest out, chains, jewelry, gaudy jewelry, you know, a little racist, the whole deal. And he goes, he's a type where he used to not only think that they were trying to get attention, people who saw UFOs or flying saucers, but he also thought, you know, that, you know, they were crazy and just super crazy trying to get attention. So he would never in a million years believe it until what he witnessed with his own eyes in 73.
Starting point is 00:42:39 Yeah. What do you think your dad had a harder time believing in UFOs or that America elected Obama to be president? It's really close. It's really close. But I would say what baffled him more was Obama in all. Not 14. Yeah, your pop. He can't believe it, right? Your pop cannot believe it.
Starting point is 00:43:00 He can't handle it. He's like a dog who sees a squirrel from the window. He can't handle it. He can't handle it. He's like a dog who sees a squirrel from the window. He just can't handle it. He can't handle it. He can't believe that this country elected Obama. My dad is like, you're lucky your grandfather's dead to not see that. That would have killed him. I actually said that.
Starting point is 00:43:17 So your dad, he's an Italian kid from the Bronx. Tough Italian. Nice guy, though. He is a great guy. I don't want to paint him like, you know, old school Italian where he grew up. He grew up in the Bronx. I mean, it is what it is. Nice guy, though. He is a great guy. I don't want to paint him like, you know, it's this old school Italian where he grew up. Yeah, he grew up in the Bronx. I mean, it is what it is. I mean, you know, we say it on the podcast. It's just what it is.
Starting point is 00:43:31 I mean, you know, it's not a perfect world. That's who he is. He's an Italian kid from the Bronx. Italian kids, they're number one in racism. We talk about it all the time. Food and racism, Italians number one. He just can't. Yeah, it's like he didn't, you know, when you grow up in a certain place and you're not traveled well.
Starting point is 00:43:49 And, you know, you just you hear things and you grew up. My father also was almost kidnapped at a very young age from African-American man. And that like did something. So that's hard to break, I think, too. So, yeah, he grew up in a Bronx tale, basically like the movie, right? Yeah. Bronx tale is pretty much like how they grew up, how he grew up. Yeah, he grew up in the Bronx basically, like the movie, right? Yeah, Bronxdale is pretty much like how he grew up.
Starting point is 00:44:07 Now he made it, your pops, and then he moved to Westchester and had you. He got big there. He made some money and then went out. That's what kids from the Bronx, to go to Westchester, that's like that's like making it all the way, that's like really classy if you're from the Bronx. If you're Italian
Starting point is 00:44:23 or you're Puerto Rican. No, my father looks at people who go to westchester as if they made it they made it yeah yeah it really is like top level for for a lot of people who grew up in the city yeah yeah so what happened this because this is crazy because you said the u UFO he saw was like came down close. Yeah. And I actually looked into it more. And there were reports in newspapers all around Yonkers about what happened. So my grandmother for 50 something years lived right off of Yonkers Avenue near Yonkers Raceway. You know, really close to really close to the Bronx. But she lived there. She had a little patio right outside her front door where there was a little lot, a little grass lot. When you're younger, it looks bigger,
Starting point is 00:45:10 of course, but there was this little grass lot. They were outside. My mother was pregnant with my brother, 1973. They're all outside. My dad is sitting in the little patio right by the front door watching a small TV my grandmother had. They they hear hollering. He hears hollering. Tommy, get outside. You got to see this. Get outside. And he looks, and they're all looking up at the sky. And he was like annoyed.
Starting point is 00:45:31 Like, what are they talking about? What's going on? You know, he was annoyed, and he went outside. And he told me, he goes, what I saw, I wish I didn't, because it made it real. But he said, hovering silently, hovering silently too he said zero sound and he's very descriptive when he tells what he saw but it's hilarious because he's descriptive but like an italian so he'll be like you won't fucking believe this fucking thing no sound no and and and the way he
Starting point is 00:46:00 was saying it was so real that i i believed it of course but he said it had a bluish he saying it was so real that I believed it, of course, but he said it had a bluish, he said it was hovering over the lot and it had a bluish tint to it. Like it was silver, but it almost looked blue around it. Right. Um, and he said he noticed that there were little like portholes, like little tiny little circles he couldn't see through, but he noticed that there were definitely some sort of like circular windows around the thing. And then he said it was so close. He's thinking if I had a gun or a rock, I could actually hit this. And then he, well, that makes me think right there.
Starting point is 00:46:38 Do you think maybe he just saw an interracial couple and he thought it was a UFO because he couldn't believe it? Yeah. He saw an interracial couple. Yeah. And he's like, let me get it back. His brain just went, that's a UFO. I don't, I can't understand it. I can't understand what's going on. He could not, he, he said he couldn't believe it. But then he told me this story that he thought they were reading his mind. He got, so basically it looked, he went from looking at it to a full fledged.
Starting point is 00:47:04 He actually had a panic attack where he was like, he had these thoughts of I could hit this, I can throw a rock, I could shoot a gun, something. And he was like, man, what if they're reading my mind? So he kind of like stepped in the door and started looking at it again. But then he came back out. And then he said, as they're looking at it, and this is the funniest thing he said, he goes goes and then it disappeared into a dot in the sky like a star it was the freakiest shit i ever seen he always told us that he always said that he was looking at it and he said in one second and not even a second it turned into a star it just so it went back it shot back what's that it just shot. It like went far away. It just moved so fast in like an instant.
Starting point is 00:47:46 That's what a lot of people report. Yeah. Yeah. He said that whatever it is, he's absolutely convinced it's not, there's no technology on this planet that could do something like that. And then he said that it scared him and he didn't want to talk about it for a really long time until people started to say kind of the similar things that he saw, like how in a blink of an eye, it was just gone. And then I guess in the papers in 1973, around, around Yonkers people,
Starting point is 00:48:10 a lot of people obviously saw it. Was there anyone else out there with him that can, that saw it too? Yeah. My mom, my mom, this is a hilarious story. So my dad wouldn't want to tell anybody about it. Right. He didn't want to tell anybody about it. He's like, listen, I don't want to. You've got to understand, it's 1973. This is 1970. This is even before the, you know, even in the 80s, people were looked at as crazy. 1973 was like a no-no to talk about.
Starting point is 00:48:35 It was like, hush, you know what I mean? He didn't want to look. So my dad was kind of a bigwig at AIG in Manhattan before my parents got divorced. My dad was doing actually really, really well, you know, educated and, and was doing really well. And, um, they were at an AIG party in Long Island, everybody's barbecue and all the big wigs from AIG and a big fight. My mom, my mom got into it. My dad is in the middle of this party. She mortified him. She was having a good time. I guess having some drinks, all these AIG big wigs are there, barbecue going, and she just yells across the party, hey, Tommy, get over here and tell them about the time we saw the flying saucer, right? And my dad goes, no, these people are
Starting point is 00:49:16 going to think I'm crazy. I'm going to get fired. They're going to think that they got a lunatic working in the, you know, trying to get attention. He was really upset with my mom about her, you know, her blowing up the spotlight. That's how much he didn't want to talk about. Was she there? Was she there with him when he saw it? My mother and my father, you know, Giannis, we're good friends. You know, their relationship. I mean, the first time they were under the same roof after the divorce was my wedding 20 plus years later. The first time they were ever in the same room other than court. And obviously not the greatest of relationships. And my mom said exactly what my dad said.
Starting point is 00:49:48 My aunt was out there and my grandmother. And they all say they saw. Nobody's story has changed. Wow. Wow. Yeah, yeah. Paul's mom is Greek. He's half Greek and his father's Italian.
Starting point is 00:50:01 And we've talked about it on the podcast again because we have Venetia as our new intern. She's Greek. And we talk about it all the time. How like, yeah, Greeks, if, if a Greek,
Starting point is 00:50:10 a Greek woman is dating, uh, like, uh, somebody who's not Greek, the, the father can't handle it. The father wants them dead. The father,
Starting point is 00:50:16 your mother's parents wanted your father dead. They wanted him dead. They look at Italians like animals. Greeks look at Italians as like criminal animals that they want far away from their daughters. And that there's there is no exaggeration. There is no exaggeration to that. Please. Am I telling the truth?
Starting point is 00:50:35 No, it's it's it's still 100 percent true that my my mother tells the story where the first time my my Greek greek i mean my italian grandparents rest their soul the verses my father's my father's parents the first time they showed up to my greek grandmother's house to meet for dinner my greek grandmother met them said hello and then just migrated into a room by herself and just full-fledged started crying it waske down crying. It was tragic. She couldn't believe it. Yeah, it was almost like losing a family. She couldn't believe it. So my mom had to go and console her.
Starting point is 00:51:11 She just broke down because she's got these Italians. She knew she was in too deep. And the Italians were coming into the family. She couldn't handle it. That is wild, man. Yo, your dad saw a UFO. Crazy. Well, make no mistake, though, Giannis, and you know this, too.
Starting point is 00:51:26 Make no mistake. Oh, we don't make mistakes. As much as you talk about Italians being racist, Greeks are up there. No, no, no. Some of the top racists out there. Well, when we talk about Italians being racist, Italians are the number one in racism because they're also funny with it. They make it funny. in racism because they're also funny with it. They make it funny.
Starting point is 00:51:47 Like, you know, Italian racism is so creative and hilarious, you know, that they're number one at it. Greeks are actually like number one in racism, but they just, they hate everybody. So it's like, they hate everybody and they're not as funny, I think, as Italians. I think Italians and blacks are probably the two funniest cultures, know what i mean when it comes to like to ribbing and stuff and like making jokes but with joke with racist jokes italians are number one you got to give it to italians i'm a racist joke greeks are just racist greeks are racist and greeks hate everybody greeks are so hilar racist. They're racist against fucking Italians.
Starting point is 00:52:26 Greeks hate Italians. They hate fucking Swedish people. They hate German people. Greeks only love Greeks. And that's just what it is. Greeks are the only group of people that want nothing to do with anyone else except Greeks. Forget about it. Yeah, they just want Greeks. Eastern Hemis and Turks, they don't even look at them as people. Like if you're Turkish, you're not a person to a Greek person. You're just not a fucking person. They don't want anything to do with you.
Starting point is 00:52:49 ISIS Greeks fucking hate you and what your people did. All right? So anyway, I wanted to get that story on, man, because that story is... Can you imagine, like, how funny would that be if your father just took out a gun and started shooting at the flying saucer? He started shooting. Yeah, he started shooting. You're like, fuck, get the fuck out of here.
Starting point is 00:53:08 You fucking with these aliens. When it was like, get the fuck out of my neighborhood. These fucking aliens. These fucking aliens are moving in, trying to take over the fucking neighborhood. Get the fuck out of here. Take that shit to Jersey. Take that shit back to fucking Jersey where you came from. These fucking alien mullignons.
Starting point is 00:53:28 A lot of 14. Yeah, come on, Zach. Thank you very much. Yeah. Yeah, Italians. If aliens come, I want them to come to the Italian neighborhood because nobody's better at getting people out of their neighborhood than Italians. Italians are all- How funny would it be if an Italian mob boss met with the alien, the top alien guy in the neighborhood, and they sat down at a bar.
Starting point is 00:53:48 And he was like, listen, we can't have this in the neighborhood here. Take this somewhere else, but it's not going to happen here. It's not going to happen in my neighborhood. My neighborhood is from East 24th to East 25th. You can't come into my neighborhood, okay, Ben? Look, I don't know what planet you're from, okay? But you better take this shit back there, because it's not going to happen here. Not in my fucking neighborhood. Not on Arthur Avenue in the from, okay? But you better take this shit back there because it's not going to happen here. Not in my fucking neighborhood.
Starting point is 00:54:06 Not on Arthur Avenue in the Bronx, okay? God forbid. Is there any people who want people out of their neighborhoods more than Italians? I feel like that's one of the first thing Italian kids hear their parents say is, get the fuck out of my neighborhood. What are you doing in my neighborhood? Get out of my neighborhood! Oh, my God in my neighborhood? Get out of my neighborhood. Oh my God. You know what my
Starting point is 00:54:27 Greek grandmother, see the Greek, but here's the thing with the Greek racism. The Greek racism is private. It's underneath. You know, it's like looking out the blinds and when nobody's around, they bad mouth. The Italians just have to go at the moment. Whatever it is, they just have to say it.
Starting point is 00:54:43 They don't care who's around, who hears it. They just go with it. And that's how my dad was. Yeah. Do you think if the aliens kept coming into the Bronx on Arthur Avenue, you think Italians were getting Cadillacs and try to chase the flying saucer with bats? My dad looked at the Obama presidency as if an alien was there. He would actually say, what's next? They're going to put an alien in office if he puts it on that same level.
Starting point is 00:55:10 Yeah. Now your father, whenever he's about to say something bad, he always goes, I'm a little confused, right? He starts with like, I'm a little confused. Yeah. Well, I'm set with us. Yeah. You know, that's a, that's actually a piece I'm doing in a new hour where it's. All right.
Starting point is 00:55:22 So we won't put it on the cast if you don't want. What's that? If you don't want it, if it's a bit, you don't want to. No, no, no, no, no. That's fine. No,'m doing in a new hour where it's like. All right, so we won't put it on the cast if you don't want. What's that? If you don't want to, if it's a bit, you don't want to. No, no, no, no, no. That's fine. No, no, no, no. It's just part of it. It's just part of the joke.
Starting point is 00:55:31 But so the Italian and Sicilian pride is so great that their family is number one and there could be no embarrassment with the family. There can be no embarrassment because it's all together and it's a reflection of, it's a reflection of them. because it's all together and it's a reflection of them. And that's kind of what the mob goes by, where it's like if one of the members does something that's a bad reflection of the boss, the guy's got to go. Well, in a very small way, that's what it is in family. So if my dad's upset with me or my brother, his two sons, he can't say I'm upset or mad because it's an embarrassment.
Starting point is 00:56:02 So what he says is he's a little confused. Whenever he says he's confused, we know something. So I'll tell you the story with my daughter. So my daughter's name is Sophia Aaronverse, right? So my dad, because my wife is Scandinavian, German, Irish, everything. So my dad calls me up and he goes, yeah, Paul, Paul, you know, congratulations on the baby girl. Beautiful, beautiful. And he goes, name's Sophia.
Starting point is 00:56:33 He goes, strong, strong Italian name. I like it. He goes, then I noticed. He goes, her middle name was Erin. He goes, I'm a little confused. And I go, you know, my wife goes, I know, I know. But listen, it's Italian up top. It's Italian in the bottom.
Starting point is 00:56:53 We don't need to confuse with the Irish. Nobody wants to be confused. And that's his way of going. Why did you mess up the name? So that's very much how my father has been my whole life in a nutshell like that. So when you when you hear I'm a little confused, you know, something real like negative is about, he's about to say something real negative.
Starting point is 00:57:09 And he always starts it positive, right? Like, look, nice decor, everything, but I'm a little confused. Yeah. So what it always starts off, it always starts off nice. It always starts off, oh, great. How you doing? Good, good. I'm proud of my boy.
Starting point is 00:57:22 You're doing really good. Listen, I saw. And then the voice gets lower. You know, the voice goes down and then, you know, then you know it's coming. But it always starts off nice. And then if he feels like he's insulting you with what with the criticism, he always goes, all right, don't get excited. Don't get mad at me. Don't get mad at me. Don't get excited. That's a big Italian. Don't get excited. Yeah. Don't get excited. The big time. That's a big time. Don't get excited. Don't get excited. It's a big Italian. That's a big Italian. Don't get excited. Alright, listen. Thanks, Paul. I wanted to get that story on the potty. We're talking about Bob Lazar. I watched a documentary last night, Area 54. You know, that's like a big
Starting point is 00:57:53 are there aliens? Are there not? That's a great story. Check out Paul Verzi. His podcast, The Verzi Effect. One of my best friends. And follow him on Instagram, Paul Verzi. Also, check out Paul Verzi Effect, one of my best friends. And follow him on Instagram, Paul Verzi. Also check at Paul Verzi. And check out his special.
Starting point is 00:58:09 They can find it on the Comedy Central app, right? You can find the special streaming on the Comedy Central app. It's called I'll Say This. It broke all of their online views when we debuted. It's doing really well. And this weekend, I will be at Laugh Boston in Boston, Massachusetts, from the 27th to the 29th, this Thursday through Saturday. Thanks for having me.
Starting point is 00:58:28 I call. So speak to you soon. Take care, Paul. Later. Go see fucking Paul at the fucking laugh Boston. If you, if you're a non toot and you're listening to this, I just been getting the fucking apps up early. So that's what it is.
Starting point is 00:58:43 Paying off. So this is what it is. This guy, Bob Lazar, he's like the... Go ahead, what were you going to say? I'll bring it up at the end. There's one thing we've got to bring up that we never got back to. Go ahead. Now I'm curious. At the end, why... That'd be funny if he just came out of the closet and he was like, listen, listen...
Starting point is 00:58:59 Let's take off a mask. Yeah, your career would take off. Fucking Mexican gay guy. I wish I was trans. We never said what the deal with angelo was uh what do you mean well we started a story about angelo about him being in poor health and we never got to the end of it oh yeah we got sidetracked yeah we had a good time in miami oh yeah but, but on the way back, we just fucking, this is what ended up happening. On the way back, we were flying standby. It was pouring rain.
Starting point is 00:59:29 Pouring rain. Two canceled flights. Yeah. Three, four, five. Yeah, and Angela warned us. She said, I spoke to this girl. She said, flying standby from Miami on the way back is not really a good idea. And boy, did we find out that that was correct. We ended up having to get a hotel room at one of those hotels
Starting point is 00:59:46 by the... Who stares at... All you see at hotels by airports is like flight attendants and prostitutes. That's all I saw in the lobby of the fucking Hilton by the Miami-Dade Airport or whatever it's
Starting point is 01:00:02 called. Miami International Airport. I mean, you see so many prostitutes. I went down to fucking eat at the bar. I came back. All you see is prostitutes and flip flops. And they always wear comfortable shoes because, you know, they walk around in the flip flops and they get right to the door and they throw the heels on from the purse. But you can just tell they're prostitutes.
Starting point is 01:00:20 And that's it. And it always smells a little bit like a strip club in the elevator because of all those lotions that they wear, you know what I mean? That strip of lotion that they have. So we stayed at one of those airports. It smells like it's pink, right? The lotion smells like it's pink. Yeah. And there's like glitter. There's always glitter on the buttons
Starting point is 01:00:38 because they always got glitter on. And they have attitude. They do. They're not nice. Well, why would they be? They're going to fuck some old guy. You know? Possessors are not nice. They're not nice. Well, why would they be? They're going to fuck some old guy. You know? Possessors are not nice. They're not nice. You'll be like, yo, you're being a little rude. Chip her out. Don't ruin my mood just because you got to go fuck an old guy.
Starting point is 01:00:54 Fuck, come on, honey. Fuck, come on, honey. It was all toots. So we ended up having to we just gave up. We were at the airport what, like six hours? So Angelo he has some health issues. It's my up. We were at the airport, what, like six hours? So Angelo, he has some health issues. And it's my fault. We walked about nine miles that day in an airport.
Starting point is 01:01:10 You know, airports are small. I mean, they're not small. So when you're flying standby, it's not. Gate five. Yeah, and then they give you another gate. And it's like at the other end of the airport. And you have to run back and forth from all. So it was actually like the worst thing I could have done to Angelo is what I did.
Starting point is 01:01:27 We kind of left Angelo, let Angelo just rest though. Every now and then we would just leave him out of gate just to get our shit together. And then we would just see him resting on the floor like a sloth that fell from a tree. Right? Like an injured sloth. And we would throw him like sound patches. Like, there you go. We'll get your energy up. Yeah. It was like. But he was throw him like sound patches. Like, there you go. Yeah.
Starting point is 01:01:47 But he was in good spirits, man. Because he's not feeling well. And like, you know, shit, that would have been me. And yo, I knew you fucked up like that. You would have been pissed. Yeah. Angelo's such a good guy. He's so positive. We're going to have some fucking hard laughs.
Starting point is 01:02:01 You know what it feels like? You want to get on that plane so bad when you're flying standby. And you keep running from gate to gate. It gets even worse. And as the day's going on, you're like, am I going to get trapped in Miami? And so you want to get on so bad and you start to hear all the names and you see your name low on the list. It's almost I guess I started to feel what it must have felt like to be like one of the people in the lower class cabins of the Titanic, as all those upper class people were getting on those little fucking boats
Starting point is 01:02:28 and getting out. We're like, yo, am I going to die here in Miami? So that's what it felt like. Cause people are just leaving. 10 people on a flight. So you're like number 76.
Starting point is 01:02:37 I'm about to hit some football numbers out this bitch. The false hope too. You start to get delusional with the hope. Cause you see, we were seeing our name at like 70, but we were all going, let's just stick around. Maybe these people are not here. 70 people aren't here? You're not getting on this fucking
Starting point is 01:02:52 flight. So at the end, we just gave up. Sergio got on because he's a level one. His wife's a flight attendant. So he got on. Level three, me and Angelo were assed out. So we ended up fucking staying at the hotel close to the airport and we left the next day so and like yeah I
Starting point is 01:03:08 just as soon as I got off in JFK I just texted Angela like you good pa and I just left I wanted to get home I was just so physically exhausted I was sitting and I had a middle C the dude next to me was like as big as Tony Robbins and then the lady next to me smelled like
Starting point is 01:03:24 like like like fucking onion rings. You know what I'm saying? It wasn't exactly onion rings. It was just like kind of like that scent. And I was like, yeah. You know, just chilling and I fucking, oh, it was tough. Yeah, but we had a good time. Miami's a type
Starting point is 01:03:39 of town that you really gotta just, you really have to just um you gotta just go home you gotta go home yeah and that's what that's what you we do we did every night and that's what you gotta do when you go to Miami you just go home because Miami is a
Starting point is 01:03:56 city that fucking parties and Serge used to love Blizzy and you know what there's plenty of in Miami yeah man Blizzy temptation out there man I took a fucking uberizzy. And you know what there's plenty of in Miami? Yeah, man. Blizzy! There's a lot of temptation out there, man. I took a fucking Uber shared because my career is going so well. And I met these two guys that knew Marisa.
Starting point is 01:04:13 They did, huh? Yeah, they knew Marisa from back in the day. They were like, yo! They were like, yo, she's still doing that? They had matching hats. You got to show him the night? How about your friend? You show him the night? You do show in the night? how about your friend? you show in the night?
Starting point is 01:04:25 you do comedy in the night? I have a friend who asked me if I was that's a real Puerto Rican thing right? yeah he asked me the other day he was like yo papi what are you doing?
Starting point is 01:04:36 and I was like I got a show he's like in the night? I'm like yeah at night motherfucker Sergio made me laugh so hard when he was talking about how like you know those white dudes I'm like yeah at night motherfucker Sergio made me laugh so hard when he was talking about how like you know you know those white dudes like Chris Chris goes crazy
Starting point is 01:04:51 fucking Puerto Rican girls yeah and Sergio was talking about how like like white dudes in Miami they they go down there and like I can't I can't take all these hot Latinas fucking mucha caliente fucking hot Latinas fucking I can't fucking take it oh all these hot latinos. Fucking mucho caliente. Fucking hot latinos. Fucking.
Starting point is 01:05:06 I can't fucking take it. Oh, fucking God. They get all clenchy with that. It's even a fucking God. They got a hot latino. Fucking Jesus fucking Christ. I can't fucking take it. Mucho caliente.
Starting point is 01:05:20 Oh, God. Jerry fucking. I went down to fucking Peru. Oh, my God. So many fucking hot latinos. Yeah, God. Jerry, I went down to fucking Peru. Oh, my God. So many fucking Jolotinos. Every year, I go to the DR with my buddies, and there's fucking Jolotinos out there.
Starting point is 01:05:34 Fucking Jolotinos. Oh, their fucking Oakley glasses, red faces, and Bud Light beers. I hate those motherfuckers. Yeah, with their khaki shorts and a V-neck J. Crew shirt. And then they got those leather flip-flops on.
Starting point is 01:05:50 I just want to step on their fucking feet. Yeah. So back to fucking aliens and then we'll get out of here because Jesus Christ we're already over fucking and now on 11 I got to get back to the firehouse. So there's a document around Netflix. Joe Rogan just had the guy on and he had the filmmaker on, Bob Lazar. and now on 11 i gotta get back to the firehouse so there's a document around netflix joe rogan
Starting point is 01:06:06 just had the guy on and he had the filmmaker on bob lazar so this is the guy that's responsible for everybody knowing about area 54 he's creating some noise yeah supposedly this guy's interesting man because he's like he supposedly is some sort of scientist it's not clear he says he went to cal poly uh and another school but like they have no record of him or they're saying they have no record of him so it's like one of those things do you believe this guy or not and he says he worked with alien technology he worked at s4 which is sort of like a subsidiary of of area 54 um and area 54 it's been revealed, is a classified Air Force base where they work on, through the years they've been working on, you know, the newest bombing planes, fucking all types of new bombers and stealth bombers. Out in Nevada, right?
Starting point is 01:07:00 Yeah, out in Nevada. So they work on military technology out there. They work on military technology out there yeah they work on and some nuclear stuff and so this guy's saying that he was brought in and hired to work at s4 which was like a subsidiary of area 54 and him and his partner i think his name was bob or he says was bob um actually worked with on an alien craft they dissembled an alien craft to try to learn about what their technology is. And he says the government has nine or had nine alien flying saucers. And the way they moved, you know, and that's why this shit is like,
Starting point is 01:07:38 Dwight, I don't really believe it. I don't really fucking believe it. Because who is this fucking guy? How come it's one guy? How come it's just one guy? But then there's this other video we're about to show you where this guy like he got it on video like he's a he's a he's a fighter pilot and he sees the the fucking flying saucer and it moves but it's like he says um the way the the way that the crap the flying saucer moves is it bends gravity or the space
Starting point is 01:08:08 around it, the matter around it, and moves through it. As the saucer's moving, everything around bends through it so it can shoot through. It has no propulsion system, which is what makes it unique, because everything that shoots forward, something shoots out the back. You know what I mean? When your car,
Starting point is 01:08:24 you're shooting something out you know water steam whatever however you're powering your movement there's some sort of something shooting out the back you know for every action there's an equal but opposite reaction he's like with this uh technology it was self-sustaining it didn't have that so it's like they were trying to understand it and they couldn't and um it has some reactor in the middle and some some alien particle that they that he says he has a piece of and in the documentary he says the fbi raided his place while they were making the document i don't know you don't know if it's true or if they're doing it for the drama of the documentary because you don't see the fbi raiding his fucking house you
Starting point is 01:08:59 just see the filmmaker who by the way was annoying he's just in jeans with like a hipster haircut and a beard and fucking wearing no socks and shoes. And he was on the speakerphone with a reporter from Las Vegas the whole time. So you don't see any of this happening. You don't see him getting raided. Raided by the FBI and the CIA or whatever the
Starting point is 01:09:18 fuck. They just tell you he is. But according to this guy, he worked there. According to this guy, he's a scientist. But there's no record of him at those schools. But maybe the government erased his existence. But how come somebody else wouldn't come forward? You know what I mean? Like, how can you how can you have so many people work on something and like nothing gets out, you know?
Starting point is 01:09:37 Yeah. But anyway, that's what he's claiming. So he's and he was he came forward first anonymously in an interview years ago in the 80s. He came forward first anonymously in an interview years ago in the 80s. And then he started to come forward and show his face, according to him, because it was like his insurance policies to let himself be known. So like if anything happened to him, people would know that it was probably the government that did it because he said he was getting a lot of threats. Some somebody shot out his tires on his car. I mean, shit like that. I mean, he did.
Starting point is 01:10:02 He did put like some crazy engine in his car and he when he was living in los alamos where he originally worked before he went to nevada and he wasn't like the front page of the paper there and he doesn't know how to build engines and all that shit and do science stuff and he owns a science supply company or something like that but he's sort of like an interesting guy i mean nobody knows if what he's saying is true and then the other side you're going like why would he make that up you know maybe to become famous you always think about that as a new yorker we always go like what's his motivation that's what i always go it's like what's this guy's motivation so i don't know but here's another dude like do aliens exist do they not exist here's another dude um check this dude out this was a top gun pilot who chased a ufo
Starting point is 01:10:46 uh in an fa18 which is a type of fucking jet fighter this is mine this is what we typically flew at night you can see these little brackets here november 14th 2004 it's a clear blue sky there's no wind wasn't wind. You ever notice these pilot guys are always people who dreamt about being pilots from when they were little. Nobody goes like, you know, I turned 21 and then I figured I wanted to
Starting point is 01:11:15 fly. You always meet them. They're always like these nerds who are like, since when they're little, they're going like, with like forks or just dreaming about being up there because it's like it's almost like innate as being a scientist you have to be born with some sort of right right to fucking fly they're always these nerds who are real comfortable saying like four you know i got two rudders on the six five nine and then the jet fuel pack impact was a five nine six on a level 15 and i love beach
Starting point is 01:11:44 volleyball yeah yeah it's true you see this tic-tac it's just this white object that's 15. And I love beach volleyball. Yeah, it's true. You see this tic-tac. It's just this white object that's randomly moving around. Yo, he got footage of it. I'm on the back here next to him. I remember telling my backseater, I said, dude, I don't know about you, but I'm a little weirded out.
Starting point is 01:12:00 How come the guy in the backseat never came out? Exactly. It's not a helicopter. Yeah. Yeah. All right. It's not a helicopter. It doesn't have a rotor wash. There's no propulsion. There's no wings. It rapidly accelerates and disappears.
Starting point is 01:12:15 Like, gone. Weirdest thing I've ever seen in my life. I chased a UFO. But I like to just crawl back under a rock and be myself again yes now he just got a dog yeah yeah now they're always like retired at home i don't want to do this anymore and i just want to hang on my dog as long as you just leave me alone. I'm not. I am not. I'm not. I'm not that kind of person.
Starting point is 01:13:00 We've experienced some things ourselves. I've seen three clothes in my life. I've seen many. I've seen four. Yeah, that proves Sergio's point. They all look like a seamstress that work at prisons that will help you escape. That's what she looks like. They all look like the picture of Randy Johnson.
Starting point is 01:13:17 Yeah, the woman like a seamstress of the prison or the dude's like a Randy Johnson fucking relief picture. Do you believe these guys? I don't believe anyone with Lord of the Rings hair. Yeah, I mean like so they're just looking for like a little excitement in their life, right? They like probably their imagination
Starting point is 01:13:34 made them see something. People like that. I don't know, man. Yeah, I mean, I think that's they want to believe. I think that's the main thing with them. A lot of these people. Yeah, so they in Roswell, they do these fucking. Yeah, they do these fucking, yeah, they do these like extraterrestrial UFO conferences. And this guy speaking to those people.
Starting point is 01:13:49 So it's like, is he at the conference now? This guy, let's see what he says. Back in these things up to 10 of them for the last two weeks. And this is the first time we had manned airplanes airborne when it showed up. They'd been coming down from above 80,000,
Starting point is 01:14:02 come down, hang out at 20,000 for about three hours, and then go straight back up. They've tracked them at just sitting there. They've tracked them at high rates of speed. They've been tracked lots. Well, I should take a note. I don't think we developed that. There's a woman in the audience taking notes.
Starting point is 01:14:16 I'm just saying. Yeah. No, she's mad there's no trans on the video. That guy on the left is the director of the documentary on Netflix. Okay. Yeah. I mean, he was just like, he had no socks and shoes on the left is the director of the documentary on Netflix. Yeah, I mean, he was just like he had no socks and shoes on the whole fucking documentary.
Starting point is 01:14:29 Yeah, I want to step on his feet. This is all white people. Yeah, how come it's always white people interested in UFOs? Search, Puerto Ricans are not interested in UFOs, are they? No, but we believe in chupacabras. What is chupacabra?
Starting point is 01:14:48 It's like a fucking, it looks like a, I've only seen a drawing of it. I don't know if it doesn't really exist. Like a little vampire monster. Yeah. Do Mexicans believe in that too? Yeah. Yeah. So it's like a lot of. Chupacabras in Mexico too, right?
Starting point is 01:14:57 I mean. Is that in Mexico? It's everywhere. Yo, you try to act like you speak Spanish. Yo, you speak like that in Mexico. Yo, yo, yo, yo, yo, yo, yo, yo, yo, yo, yo, yo, yo, yo, yo, yo, yo, yo, yo, yo, yo, yo, yo, yo, yo, yo, yo, yo, yo, yo, yo, yo, yo, yo, yo, yo, yo, yo, yo, yo, yo, yo, yo, yo, yo, yo, yo, yo, yo, yo, yo, yo, yo, yo, yo, yo, yo, yo, yo, yo, yo, yo, yo, yo, yo, yo, yo, yo, yo, yo, yo, yo, yo, yo, yo, yo, yo, yo, yo, yo, yo, yo, yo, yo, yo, yo, yo, yo, yo, yo, yo, yo, yo, yo, yo, yo, yo, yo, yo, yo, yo, yo, yo, yo, yo, yo, yo, yo, yo, yo, yo, yo, yo, yo, yo, yo, yo, yo, yo, yo, yo, yo, yo, yo, yo, yo, yo, yo, yo, yo, yo, yo, yo, yo, yo, yo, yo, yo, yo, yo, yo, yo, yo, yo, yo, yo, yo, yo, yo, yo, yo, yo, yo, yo, yo, yo, yo, yo, yo, yo, yo, yo, yo, yo, yo, yo, yo, yo, yo, yo, yo, yo, yo, yo, yo, yo, yo, yo, yo, yo, yo, yo, yo, yo, yo, yo, yo, yo, yo, yo, yo, yo, yo, yo, yo, yo, yo, yo, yo, yo, yo, yo, yo, yo, yo, yo, yo, yo, yo, yo, yo you really had nothing to say I just want to tell you everyone always talks about it really freaks you out
Starting point is 01:15:30 it's really scary and then you see these women walking around with alien fucking ears on their head they got those little Marsha Brady things with the fucking extensions on top of them and they dress up they put on alien heads Zach you think there's UFOs? You believe in aliens? yeah I think there's some out there I think definitely people are trying to get
Starting point is 01:15:45 some cloud off of it, but I think they're somewhere out there. There's got to be life. There's definitely some sort of other life form. We're arrogant to not think that beyond this planet there's nothing else. Yeah, when you consider how vast, they've discovered how vast the universe is. I mean,
Starting point is 01:16:01 just mathematically, it's got to be possible. But do you think they've come this is my question like if you got the technology to come first of all how did they have nine craft where they crash i mean how did they get those yeah how did they get the flying saucers they're out of gas like yeah what did the aliens stop at a fucking rest stop and they got pulled over by police and then they those italians got up to the italians fucking get them out of my neighborhood but like how do they have the flying saucers? How did they get the flying saucers?
Starting point is 01:16:28 Yeah. Did the aliens get out of them? And then they killed the aliens. Like if they, you, if you have the technology to get here and move that fast, what kind of, what kind of human flying craft or,
Starting point is 01:16:39 or, or artillery is going to take you down? You tell me they have the technology to go to travel hundreds of thousands of light years or whatever it is at the speed of faster than light sound, whatever the fuck that is. Because even if something is like 400 light years away, you have to travel at the speed of light for 400 years. So what being lives 400 years?
Starting point is 01:17:02 That's why I'm always like, I don't think we're going to explore space because we only live, unless we figure out a way you're going to have to have multiple generations on a spacecraft to get anywhere. 400 years. 400 light years, that's not even that far in the universe, 400 light years. A lot of shit's
Starting point is 01:17:18 like hundreds of thousands of light years away. So how the fuck are you going to travel even if you can travel the speed of light or whatever, you know. It takes you 400,000 years. I mean, you'd have to have that's longer than humans have been on the fucking planet 400,000 years. So it's like some if the aliens have gotten here, they had to have figured out a way to to to hack that wormholes or something. Yeah, they've had to figure out a way to go around to hack that. They had wormholes or something.
Starting point is 01:17:41 Yeah. They've had to figure out a way to go around to hack that. And that's what this guy, Bob Lazar kind of claims is that somehow the space and time bends around the ship and pushes it forward or like it moves the unit moves shit out of the way to move it. But like, how did they get the flying saucers? What are the aliens doing coming?
Starting point is 01:18:00 And if they have the technology to come here and just get seen by a couple of people that look like Randy Johnson or get taken down. Why is it such a fucking secret? Why? Yeah. Why don't they just take over the planet? Why don't they just fucking take over the planet? If they what are they coming here for just to check it out and then leave?
Starting point is 01:18:16 I mean, what the fuck are they doing? I see so much fucked up shit as well. We see child soldiers, a bunch of crazy shit. But, you know, like, why the fuck is that a secret? Like, yeah, yeah, exactly. Why would the government keep why the fuck is that a secret? Like, you know. Yeah, exactly. Why would the government keep, what's that gonna do? I don't understand. They're driving by and going, shit, Decepticons, they took off.
Starting point is 01:18:32 That's actually a great point. I never really ever thought about it. We see so many other fucked up shit. We see rape, murder, at levels that are deplorable. You know, like, really sick shit. Child soldiers, one thing that always sticks with me, like these kids in the Congo, they're fed like gunpowder. They watch Rambo movies.
Starting point is 01:18:47 That's what they study. And then the Congo blowing fucking, you know, people's heads off. That shit is wild. But that's a secret? A fucking spacecraft? Yeah. Why would they think that people could? There's other shit that goes on in this world.
Starting point is 01:18:59 That's a lot more. Yeah, that's a good. I never even thought of that. That's a secret. Like, why would they keep it a secret do they think people can't handle it like he's making a great book but people can handle child soldiers rape murder serial killers and they tell us about that shit well i mean they don't really tell us about that shit either honestly i mean it happens every day we don't really hear about it in
Starting point is 01:19:18 the news you gotta seek that out no the news has no problem telling us about serial killers they like child soldiers and shit but you're right we hear about that shit no i mean you know they don't hide i mean like they don't actively try to suppress it yeah you know it's like you ever seen one of those movies where it's like someone's in charge but then uh you find out that they're just kind of the puppet and then there's someone secretly in charge maybe they're just secretly in charge what do you mean like maybe i don't know this is some weird shit but they can just tell the governments what to do and I don't know maybe that's why they're aliens yeah kind of
Starting point is 01:19:50 like they're secretly running shit and the you know puppets I feel like that's I feel like that's the I feel like that's the weed cipher explanation yeah check it check it check it yo we're all just thoughts of the dream somebody you know
Starting point is 01:20:06 somebody's in charge but he's not really in charge he got a secretive guy in charge so area 54 uh i always call it area 54 because i confuse it with studio 54 it's area 51 so i'm trying to to do research on Area 54 and nothing comes out but a fucking club near the tunnel with a lot of Blizzy! With Mad Molly and Blizzy! And glow sticks
Starting point is 01:20:32 all over the floor! Yeah, Area 54 is a base with all the cocaine. So Area 51, it has some lake that's like dried out there called like Groom Lake that you can see from...
Starting point is 01:20:42 Can you just see it now on Google Maps? Yo, can you try right now in the pockets, then we'll get out of here. Can you try to just see it on Google Maps? That'd be funny. Maps? Can we go to Google Maps and see if we can pull up Area 54 and look at that shit? Or how does that work? Area 51? I keep saying 54.
Starting point is 01:20:57 Yeah, comes up right here. Studio 54. So the facility, it's also been referred to as Paradise Ranch, Dreamland. Those were the nicknames for it because it's also been referred to as paradise ranch dreamland that was those were the nicknames for it because it's out in the middle of the desert and people have to live and work there or whatever but it is a real it is a real facility uh you know it is uh the airspace around it is restricted airspace it's called restricted area 4808 or whatever and um it didn't come out that it was actually
Starting point is 01:21:25 a till like the 2000s right or I don't remember but they've worked on all types of shit there and actually the primary purpose for it is still kind of
Starting point is 01:21:42 is unknown publicly unknown however based on historical evidence mostly exposed yeah most likely experimental aircraft weapon systems black op projects stuff like that and then of course when anything's anything secretive there's always conspiracy theories that a lot of those sightings probably were just craft that they were working on like you know stealth bombers those just don't look like real planes. So you see that shit moving around, probably in that area. And Roswell's in Nevada,
Starting point is 01:22:09 right? It's close to Area 51. Is that what it is? Las Vegas? Roswell's New Mexico. Oh, Roswell's New Mexico. Oh, that's where they felt like the crash happened, Roswell. But Area 51's in Nevada. So nobody knows why it's called Area 51.
Starting point is 01:22:26 It's kind of unclear. Nobody knows what it is. We have Groom Lake pulled up. That's it on Google Maps? Yeah, Google Earth. Look at that shit. So it's supposedly an empty lake and like that's the facility around it. Like you see Area 51.
Starting point is 01:22:42 Mm hmm. Yeah, man. So Area 51 right there yeah they did uh the groom lake test facility was established in 1955 by the cia for project aquatone and uh lockheed the company lockheed and the air force were working together and that's basically how shit started over there and then over the years they worked on a bunch of different shit some information's come out because of Freedom of Information Act it's basically yeah it's basically like a secret base
Starting point is 01:23:14 where they work on fucking military planes and stuff you can watch the documentary yourself yo fuck that shit open another bunny ranch there yeah some shit I'm into Some shit I'm real curious about Fucking alien
Starting point is 01:23:28 Does the bunny ranch still exist? I know the guy died I think the guy died, right? But the state, I think the state took it over Because of taxes or something None of those girls are really hot though I used to be like, when I watched it How did he get a show, that guy?
Starting point is 01:23:42 The bunny ranch And then he died He was a real creep too That's still open Open 24 hours Yeah that guy. The bunny ranch. And then he died. That's still open. Open 24 hours. Yeah. Yeah, they worked on the A-12, the YF-12A, all these ships that probably nerds know about, like people who are
Starting point is 01:23:56 in planes and stuff. Where you going? You just leaving the podcast? Yeah, you go ahead, P. All right, well, that's it, man. That's it. So go watch Bob Lazar's The Dude. I don't know.
Starting point is 01:24:09 Do you believe him? Do you not believe him? He was just on an episode of Joe Rogan. UFOs, are they real? I don't know. Tell us what you think in the comments. Yeah, tell us what you think. Hope you enjoyed the app.
Starting point is 01:24:20 I'll be in Rhode Island at the Comedy Connection coming up next month. I can't remember the date. But anyway, just follow me. You'll figure it out. At Giannis Pappas, at Chris D Comedy. Go to chrisdcomedy.com for his dates. Right now, he's in London. If you're listening to this, go see Chris at the Soho Theater.
Starting point is 01:24:39 And then check all his upcoming shows. And again, go to patreon.com slash Bay Ridge Boys. Join the matriarchy. You get all that content. And my special is up there now in its entirety. So you'll be the only ones to see it. And I hope you enjoy it.
Starting point is 01:24:56 And our shirts are available at on the volley apparel dot com slash collections slash tees. Where the fuck is this? That's where they are. Yeah, so onthevolley.com slash collections slack tees or just go to onthevolley.com onthevolleyapparel.com So it's onthevolleyapparel.com
Starting point is 01:25:16 and then you can just search history hyenas or slash collections slash tees. The shirts are up there. The shirts are fire. Coco, we got no fumes, we got witch hazel, those shirts. And then our other T's store is T spring.com slash history. Hyenas.
Starting point is 01:25:32 The links are on our YouTube. Join our YouTube page. Join our, our Instagram page. Serge, where you at? Yeah. As Sergio Chacon,
Starting point is 01:25:42 S-E-R-G-I-O-C-H-I-C-O-1. I'm on Instagram. All day, every day. All day, every day. And if, yo, if people want to throw hands, can they fucking throw hands with you? Yeah, absolutely, man. I train out of Overthrow Boxing Club. It's a dope facility.
Starting point is 01:25:56 It's very hip. You know? It's all good, man. You know? We only charge $500 a session. A lot of... For 35 minutes? No, I'm kidding.
Starting point is 01:26:05 It's reasonably priced. Come through. Holler at me. Yo, are you going on a road with Chrissy anytime soon? No, but I'm going on, I think it's USA, USO, USO tour in August. Nice. That's dope, man. That's going to be dope.
Starting point is 01:26:19 Yeah. You know what I'm saying? Support the troops. Yeah, man. So I'll be doing Bahamas, Honduras, Puerto Rico, and then we stop in Greenland. Very cool. That's weird though, right? That you go to start with that heat and then you fucking end the cold. Yo, you got a great
Starting point is 01:26:32 life, man. I'm doing it, baby. And you fly free for standby. Frozen rats. Level one. Level one is the top level of standby. We got some new Patreon members, guys. You ready? Ready. Felix Webster. Welcome to the matriarchy.
Starting point is 01:26:49 Dylan Bradley. Wow, we're starting off white. Felix Webster and Dylan Bradley. Wow. And then we got a turban with a toot. That's a PPW nominee right there. Angelo Berkus. Welcome. Christian
Starting point is 01:27:04 Wilkinson. Welcome. Tom Franks and Beans for Chr Berkus. Welcome. Christian Wilkinson. Welcome. Tom Franks and Beans for Chrissy D. Harris. So another PPW nominee. Then we got Brandon Ladd. Brandon Landry. Yeah, I mean, that's a black key. I mean, Brandon Landry sounds like a draft
Starting point is 01:27:19 pick. What's up, Brandon Landry? Then we got Jesse Revelli. How you doing, Jesse? Make sure to go like a slight stand or else you're going to get disciplined. Then we got Timmy Tattoo. Another PPW nominee. Jake Shoot.
Starting point is 01:27:36 What's up, Jake? What's up, Jake, man? How you doing, Jake? You fucking ass. Fuck yeah, man. He's fucking all Latinos. I can't fucking take it, Jake. Jake, I was in fucking Peru. Oh, my God. I can't take this fucking mucho call you a Latino. Then we got Carl G.
Starting point is 01:27:53 Farrow. Then we got Victor R. Sanchez. Que pasa, mi gente? Then we got Justin Espino. Que pasa, mi gente? Justin. Justin. Gansey. Justin Espino. Que pasa mi gente? Justin, Justin Gansey? Justin Gansey, Sauce Monkey Incorporated.
Starting point is 01:28:11 Then we got Dimitrios Gavrizas. Dimitrios Gavrizas. Ticanis Posisa Malaga. Then we got Miguel Whitest Walker Suarez. Yeah, we got a white walker. Then we got Dylan Schimberg. Oh, that kid's screwed in.
Starting point is 01:28:32 Then we got Brian Clean Piece of Beef Murray. That is... Is that number one? That's PPW. Yeah, Brian Clean Piece of Beef Murray is a PPW of the week. Oh, I might have said that too soon because with next one, we got cutie with a booty.
Starting point is 01:28:48 No longer a tootie. Wow, that's difficult. Who do you give it to? Is it cutie with a booty? No longer a tootie. I like cutie with a booty. No longer a tootie. Yeah, that's the PPW.
Starting point is 01:28:59 Runner up Brian, clean piece of beef. Murray and Tom Franks and beans for Chrissy D. Harris. That's history. There was a three on the bottom. Oh, yeah. These three. These fucking complainers.
Starting point is 01:29:10 Who do we got? We got Gregory Stitz. Welcome. He's a German. Gregory Stitz. Hell, this is a few on Gregory Stitz. He's a fucking German kid. Snow monkey.
Starting point is 01:29:22 Then we got Miles Whitney Houston, T2 Text. That's a good one. No monkey. Then we got Miles Whitney Houston T2 Text. That's a good one. We already got the PBW, though. And then we got, I like this guy, Jose the Banker. I like that. He's just Jose the Banker. So thank you guys. Thank you.
Starting point is 01:29:35 A lot of Latinos. We got a lot of Latinos. We got a lot of everything. We got a lot of everything. Yeah. Yo, we got a diverse following. We got black kids. We got Spanish kids.
Starting point is 01:29:44 We got Eastern Hemis, Asians. And of course, we got we. We have you on the we. So, yo, thank you for listening. Chrissy, will Chrissy be back next week or what's his sketch? I think he said he's going to be gone. I think he gets back next Monday. He gets back next Monday.
Starting point is 01:30:02 So he will be back next Monday. Probably not. He'll be flying back from Europe. So he's probably going to be. So if we don't reschedule with Chrissy, then Sergio, you coming back next Monday. He gets back next Monday. So he will be back next Monday. Probably not. It's going to be flying back from Europe. So he's probably going to be. So if we don't reschedule with Chrissy, then Sergio, you coming back next week? I'll come through for sure.
Starting point is 01:30:10 Yeah. And you come back anyway, yo. So follow us all. Thank you for listening. And again, most important thing, tell your friends about the history hyenas.
Starting point is 01:30:17 Peace. I don't know. ស្រូវាប់បានប់បានប់បានប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប Bye.

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