History Hyenas with Chris Distefano and Yannis Pappas - Conspiracy Cuties - JFK is DEAD!?
Episode Date: August 28, 2020Instead of WEPA this week, we’re giving you a treat of our favorite fun new series, Conspiracy Cuties. The boys dive deep into conspiracy theories in a real cute way, yaaasss! All the rest of these ...can be heard at http://patreon.com/bayridgeboys Yannis Pappas and Chris Distefano are talking about a very old conspiracy that to this day no one knows the true answer to: Who killed JFK? Did the Mob kill JFK? November 23rd, 1963 President John F. Kennedy was assassinated in Dallas, Texas during a presidential motorcade. Chris had the chance to speak to Secret Service Clint Hill on Opie and Anthony show and heard his WILD side of the story. Clint Hill and most do not believe that the shot did not come from the Texas School Book Depository Library in by Lee Harvey Oswald. First because Oswald was a squeak and such a shot would need to be done by a trained professional with a certain gun. Was his brother, Robert Kennedy the real target? Did the teamsters leader Jimmy Hoffa order the hit? Was Cuba involved? —DISCLAIMER— Like everyone else we know nothing. Reality is a suggestion. This is all hypothetical. If you take this seriously, please seek medical attention. NOW LETS GET WILD!Want more Hyena content? Check out www.patreon.com/bayridgeboys where things get really WILD!Follow us!: 🙆🏼♂️🐕🙆🏻♂️🙆🏼♂️Chris Distefano on Instagram, Twitter, website🙆🏻♂️Yannis Pappas on Instagram, Twitter, website🐕History Hyenas on Instagram, Twitter, website Subscribe to the poddy woddy on YouTube, iTunes, Spotify, and HH Clips
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Hello, History Hyena fans!
Giannis Pappas here.
What you're about to hear in the place of
WEPA in the morning
is our new series, Conspiracy Cuties,
where we get into conspiracies!
Yas!
We get to the bottom of them.
This one is about JFK.
All the rest of them can be heard at patreon.com slash bay ridge boys
support the boys join the matriarchy
what's up everybody welcome to another episode of Conspiracy Cuties.
You FCFs.
Fully charged communists.
Yeah, we changed FCF to fully charged friend to fully communist friend
because we got some commies.
Our comrades are working behind the cameras for us.
Not only is there a commie behind the camera,
but there was a commie in a book depository that killed my Catholic president, JFK.
November 22nd, 1963, 1230, where were you?
Cuz, I don't know where I was, but can I cross the line or no?
It's going to be funny, but can I cross the line?
Just don't say, just don't say, yeah.
No, I'm going to cross the line, though.
Is it okay, though?
Oh, yeah.
Cuz John F. Kennedy was handsome.
Yeah.
And he was Catholic.
Yeah.
Do one of your aunts
or your mother flick a bean to JFK?
I'm going to say,
I'm going to say
that the answer to that
is 100%
yes.
There's no way they did it, no? There's no way he did it.
There's no way they did it.
Unfortunately, I was going to say, I was going to say, even everybody, including my mom's
brother, moved their monkeys to JFK.
He's Irish.
He was Catholic.
And he's a handsome, handsome kid.
And I think there's a lot of conspiracies floating around.
I think that is why JFK died
is because he must have banged
somebody powerful's wife.
Yeah.
I mean, JFK,
the real danger about JFK
was his peace.
He was using his peace
because you're fat, fat, fat.
I mean, I'm fat, right?
You're fucking fat.
Because is it like annoying to see a fat guy?
Yeah, because you shaved your face.
You didn't get a haircut.
You're fat, fat, fat. I'm here.
Wait, wait, wait.
You think I just leave that one in there?
Yeah.
Guys. Sorry, Christos just got one more out.
That was the last one from Christos. Yeah, cuz
I'm a fat kid, no?
Yeah
I go from handsome to just a different guy
Hour by hour
Cuz you're a handsome guy by morning
And a fat woman by night
Yeah This is the worst possible angle for a guy who's struggling with weight control
during quarantine it's what it is cuz and that's why we're you want to know what's funny about us
as a podcast we were told by the fans that it was a horrible angle and we said let's keep doing it
for that reason doing it yeah yeah let's keep what it. Yeah. Let's keep doing it. It's what it is. Okay. Yeah, so, okay,
so let's take you there.
November 22nd, 1963, 1230.
Yeah, maybe you haven't heard of it.
We're going to tell you
about a little incident
you may not have heard of.
We may not have heard of.
Yeah.
President JFK is dead.
Yeah.
So he was now,
November 23rd, 1230, Dallas.
He was on his way
to the Dallas Improv.
And, yeah.
To go see Hurricane perform. Yeah. Because, yeah, Dallas Improv. To go see Hurricane perform.
Yeah.
Because Dallas Improv, there's a lot of black comics in there.
Yeah, there's a lot of black comics.
And there is a comedy club in Dallas named Hyenas Comedy Club.
So that's also part of the conspiracy, is why did he get killed in Dallas?
And then they named the comedy club Hyenas.
Yeah.
And it's also a conspiracy.
It's like they called their club Hyenas before we started History Hyenas.
So did we steal it from them?
I don't know.
I don't know.
I would put my money on no.
There's a guy.
I did Jim and Sam, the Jim and Sam show with this guy, Clint Owen.
Or maybe it was Opie and Jim at the time.
Clint, the only thing you've done, you got a dirty dick.
I got a dirty dick.
Yeah, it's interesting that I just came from Lake George,
and now my boy who's a doctor just sent me that there's an ST.
Gone area is rampant in Lake George. They found samples of it in the actual leg yeah cuz and
chrissy was just there i want to go back to the lake george with debo and fucking fish him out of
lake george absolutely yeah yeah debo is fucking yeah he's that kid's an earbud so so um so uh
um the guy clint uh I forgot his last name.
He wrote a book.
Eastwood.
Clint Eastwood.
He told me that he's the officer, if you ever see the video,
who runs and jumps in the back seat right before it.
You met that guy?
We did Opie and Jim with him, and he gave me his book.
Clint, if you could look up Clint something was his name.
Strawberry.
Google my name.
And Chris DiStefano.
Yeah.
Or whatever his last name is. We'll get his name first, I guess. And then, oh, Clint Black. I think it's his name i and then google my name and chris stefano yeah and or whatever his last name is we'll get his name first i guess and then oh clint black i think it's clint black so what
did the guy say to you he told me he told me yeah this is the guy secret service so clint hale so
clint hale yeah google clint hale chris stefano let's see if we pop up together um he told us
that um that when he jumped even though he's at yeah, see, that's where we're on.
What did I say?
Oh, I asked him a question.
Let's see what I asked him.
Can we hear what I asked him?
Because I don't remember this.
Because I'm.
Kennedy, Johnson, Nixon, and Ford.
Look, it's Chip Chipperson.
Four for five.
One got shot.
Oh.
Oh, wow. What? I can't. I'm studying history. four for five one for five oh oh wow
I'm studying history
well I mean that was a tough day for Mr. Hill
it was a tough day for the nation
tough day for everyone
let me do something out of Sherard Small
a little higher from here
you see like two scientists dragging in like an alien
oh shit
I was supposed to see.
And then you're like, and they got to zap you and erase your memory.
Did that ever happen?
No, no, that never did happen.
I was dragging in.
That would be a good chapter.
Did it ever happen?
No, because I know you're a man of science, but are aliens real or what?
Oh.
Well, you can believe in them if you want to, but I don't.
You've seen some shit down that nuclear shelter.
Wow.
Probably.
Do the planes have escape pods just in case?
Do they, like, was there seriously like a button that he would go in and-
This is a good question.
These guys are laughing at me.
They don't?
So if this shit goes down, you're all going down?
There's nothing you can do?
I thought that he, there's some escape pod.
You can't let the-
I think the back of the plane opens up and everyone has parachutes at least.
Fully charged.
Like in the movie Air Force One with Harrison Ford
we have to listen to this
I thought maybe I asked him something
about JFK
but anyway he told me at some point
I thought that's what the video that's why I brought it up
he told me that when he jumped in told us
when he jumped in the back that
Kennedy's head was in two pieces and that he was
100% dead on
arrival yeah there he is.
So, yeah, Clint, that's him right there.
I guess I'm teabagging Clint.
That's Governor Connolly.
Oh, that's Governor Connolly.
So when he jumped in, he said his head was in two pieces
and he had 100% been shot two to three times despite people saying.
So he doesn't believe that that shot came from the book depository
because off the angles, they don't believe that that shot came from the book depository because off the angles they don't
believe that it happened and he believes his opinion is that it had to do with jfk he's like
you know he would walk around he said almost every city we went to at some event we'd have to
somehow escort somebody's husband out because they had jfK had hooked up with their wife at some point
or done something with their wife or something.
He's like, so the womanizing caught up to him.
He was like, and that's what we think it is.
He said, but he was in no way, shape, or form alive when they took him to that hospital.
He was dead in the back.
He said, and I saw his head in two pieces, which is wild to talk to a guy who was actually there.
Who was there at that time.
Yeah.
Yeah.
He's a fascinating guy.
Well.
I was asking him about fucking aliens.
Yeah.
But I mean, you know, it's kind of crazy when you are, your whole life is defined by something
that happened to somebody else much more famous than you.
Right.
And like nobody ever wants to talk to you about anything else.
Right.
Like if that guy came to dinner and my dad was like,
this is my friend Clint.
I'd be like, hey, Clint, how you doing?
What do you do?
He'd be like, yeah, you know, I was in security for a while.
Oh, where?
You know, when I was younger, I was in Dallas.
I used to guard the president.
Oh, which president?
You know, Kennedy.
Wow.
Kennedy?
Kennedy.
Did you know anybody who was there with diamond when
he was in dallas what actually that was me i was garden really yeah now it's like all right guy
yeah i don't care about anything else in your life yeah tell me about that one event you're the plus
one in kennedy's death story we should do it we should we should do a podcast like getting to know
people outside like getting to know other angles of these people.
Yeah, like, hey, guy, you like golf?
He's like, yeah.
Look, nobody ever gives a shit what this guy likes
because all they want to know about is what happened on that day
and if Lee Harvey Oswald is a Jew.
Wei Zhongzhen.
That's what it is.
So at 2.15, so he gets shot at 12.30.
It's the big questions.
We tackle. Wei Zhongzhen. So he gets shot at 12.30. It's the big questions. It's the big questions we tackle.
Ray Jong-jan.
So he gets shot at 12.
Were you happy about this, that he got killed?
What's your family stance?
That's what I want to know.
I want to know what a household full of German-Irish Catholics,
deep in a blue-collar working neighborhood,
how they were affected by this.
By this?
Well, I'll tell you what.
I'll tell you what. I'll tell you what.
I think that they were extremely affected because my mother had a picture of Pope John Paul II
and then another picture of JFK in the kitchen until my teenage years.
And so did my aunt.
So did my aunt who lived downstairs.
Was that a big deal for them to finally have a Catholic?
What, does it stink?
Yeah.
They come from a part of your ass that's just
it's next level and
it's one of those things where it's just
bad. Because you're an expert,
you are a doctor, do you think that smell means I got
ass cancer or something in there? I don't think it's ass cancer
but I think it's coming from an ungodly
depth of your Greek
asshole. Because just how
mad my fat
rolls make you,'re blindingly white thighs
I want to spill coffee all over them. Yeah, just to darken them up a little bit darken them up a little bit
Yeah, I'm sorry. I'm white. I'd be mad if I wasn't white too. Why John John why John John?
Why John John I'm Chrissy Christos cuz when I turn into Chrissy Christos. It's wild
Yeah, I mean, here's the thing.
JFK was killed by a guy named Lee Harvey Oswald.
Yeah, and police.
Let's just uncover the truth here.
It's just, you know, it's not real.
And, you know, it's just a myth.
Oh.
All right, so let's tell.
So what happened?
So Lee Harvey Oswald,
what was he doing?
The kid was getting a knish
and then what happened?
Yeah, I mean, the kid,
here's the thing.
The kid was like,
he spent some time.
He looks like Gary Veeder.
Dude, he's actually,
he does look like Gary Veeder.
Yeah.
He's the only guy
who, I actually brought
Gary Veeder up once
as Lee Harvey Oswald. Are you serious? I did do that. Yeah. He was not thrilled about it. Yeah. He's the only guy who, I actually brought Gary Veeder up once as Lee Harvey Oswald.
Are you serious?
I did do that.
Yeah.
He was not thrilled about it.
Yeah.
But I still thought it was very funny
when I was hoping to give it up
for Lee Harvey Oswald, everybody.
Just thank God Gary Veeder
has a dog walking business.
That's all I'll say.
Yeah, it's what it is.
That's what you call Chrissy Clarice Starling.
Agent Chrissy Clarice Starling.
It's what it is.
Anyone can get it out of her.
It's a random fire.
I mean, the kid was just walking around
minding his own business, Gary Veeder,
and he just got shot.
Yeah.
He just got shot.
Yeah, I mean, I don't fucking know.
You don't fucking know what's going on, guys.
At all.
I mean, that kid does comedy.
I'm like, is his microphone off?
I mean, what the fuck's happening?
Way John John.
And Nimesh Patel's sitting there going,
God, at least it wasn't me.
Oh, my God't me oh my God
oh my God
I mean all I know
honestly dude
I'm being honest
if you put me
in a comedy show
with back to back
Nimesh Patel
then Gary Vito
you could give me
six bumps of coke
and I'd still fall asleep
way John Jan
way John Jan
I mean those kids
should be nicknamed
Nye and Quill
I mean I mean, those kids should be nicknamed Nye and Quill.
I mean, that kid.
I mean, yeah.
I mean, they fucking go night.
Those are the night-night boys.
Chrissy Christos.
Yeah, it's what it is.
It's Chrissy Christos.
Yeah, I mean, look, sometimes the lights go out.
They're good kids, right?
They're good kids. You have to say that. They're good kids. I mean, the truth is what are you gonna do anyway i mean a fuck it you know what are you gonna do please so yeah harvey oswald uh lee harvey oswald
um yeah by the way lee harvey oswald he sounds like he's like a seven foot black basketball
player yeah with that name lee harvey oswald doesn't sound like he's like a seven-foot black basketball player. Yeah. With that name, Lee Harvey Oswald, doesn't he sound like he's like a power forward?
100%.
Yeah.
Like, yeah, did Lee Harvey Oswald, did he go to St. John's?
Lee Harvey Oswald, yeah, he sounds like he's racially profiled in the 70s.
Yeah, he does.
He looks like he's just a kid who played for St. John's.
Yeah.
But was, yeah, did he play Willie Glass?
Yeah, that was Lee Harvey Oswald.
No, but he's a squeak.
He's a fucking squeak.
He's a squeak big time.
And he's a commie.
He's a commie squeak, but a lot of people do not believe
that Lee Harvey Oswald was in fact the killer.
They believe because he had some right-wing ties
and he was kind of a nut
and he just recently started working at the-
Communist ties.
At communist ties at the books depository in Dallas
that he was the perfect person to pin this on.
Yeah, well, it just conveniently,
it seemed like there was a photo with him in the rifle.
I mean, when you look back at it, it's kind of comical to think that he did it.
I mean, the kid did not do it.
I mean, first of all, he's a squeak.
So how's he going to fuck?
The gun was as big as he was.
And Clint, the guy Clint said that it had to be 100% a marksman sharpshooter
to get two or three perfect kill shots on JFK in the manner they good it to split
his head in half like that and if Lee Harvey Oswald had no talent uh had no experience which
he didn't then it's almost impossible that it was him yeah and also people heard something on
the grass you know and by the way nobody would ever ever know to call that a grassy knoll if
this didn't happen why did they decide to call it a grassy knoll? Why didn't they just say it was on the fence
where the grass is?
What's a fucking knoll?
I don't know.
Did you know what a knoll is before this happened?
I have no idea what a knoll is.
Have you ever looked at a park and been like,
meet me and let's have a picnic on the knoll?
Never on the knoll.
What the fuck is a knoll?
But now, if that shit happened today,
I mean, there'd be witnesses
because there'd just be a protest.
If there's grass, there's a protest.
Yeah, there's always cameras now.
You can never pull it off.
But here's the deal. How often do i say here's the deal a lot i need to be put
down yeah to be put down for a few for a few reasons yeah yeah one of them which is you know
yeah um yeah how did okay so some people think that the teamster leader, Jimmy Hoffa, played by Al Pacino and the Irishman,
they think that he conspired with the mafia to kill JFK.
And the reason why is because the Teamster's pension fund grew so much in the mid-20th century
that they were funding construction casinos in Las Vegas and things like that.
And then JFK was going to crack down on that, and he needed to go.
Yeah.
The other thing a lot of people don't know about JFK,
to be honest with you,
is you already brought up the fact he was banging everyone's wife.
There's a great book called The Dark Side of Camelot
by Seymour Hersh about that.
But also, a lot of people don't know,
the kid had debilitating back pain throughout his entire life.
And he was a gambling addict, too.
Was he a gambling addict?
I think so.
I knew he had debilitating back pain to the point sometimes he couldn't go out.
He had to lay down.
He had to take a lot of painkillers.
So this could have been a drug hit.
Somebody could have sold him Oxy.
This could have been the same reason why somebody might get killed in a suburb of New Hampshire.
They didn't pay their Oxy dealer.
They didn't pay their Oxy dealer.
Yeah, and the Oxy dealer is Richie G based off his apartment.
Yeah, I mean, Richie G, because if you don't think he's had a couple of strippers up there
who he's paid an extra couple C-notes to do extra things, then you got another thing coming.
I mean, Richie G got a few DMs from some female members of the matriarchy after they saw his career.
Yeah, I mean.
And one of them was Adventia Garros.
Yeah, Richie g is no
question a type of guy who will have cocaine when you go into his apartment the kids got
freshly cut cocaine and that's just what richie g is okay so jfk was elected president in 1960
um he appointed his brother robert as the attorney general. And a lot of people think that Robert Kennedy was really the initial mafia target.
There's a mob boss.
If we could go to the end with the notes where at the end there was a mafia guy that –
no, I think at the end, a mafia guy in his deathbed, all the way at the end.
I think it was at the very bottom.
Okay, yeah, 1964.
No, no, no, we can read that.
I just – there we go. Okay, yeah, 1964. No, no, no, we can read that. I just,
there we go. Yeah, that right there. Santos Traficante and Carlos Marcello allegedly
arranged the assassination of President Kennedy. Regano, I'm sorry, and then Frank Regano is a guy
who wrote a book about this, about these mob bosses. Santos Traficante and Carlos Marcello
were mob bosses, and Regano said in his book that when Traficante was dying Marcello were mob bosses and Regano said in his book
that when Traficante was dying in 1987
he confessed to having a role in the killing
though he says the mob eventually came to
mob boss eventually came to regret
not killing Robert instead of his brother
but Robert did eventually get killed
so who knows if the mob did that too
they blame that on
what's that guy's name?
Boutros Boutros something?
Boutros Boutros Ghali.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Who was the...
Yeah, he was the head of the United Nations, but he also probably killed Kennedy.
Also, Boutros Boutros Ghali didn't kill RFK.
Who killed RFK?
Sandra Dee.
Is it Boutros Boutros Ghali?
What's the fucking guy's name again?
Guy's name is Sandra Dee.
What is it?
It's Birnoff Smirnoff.
Yeah.
Who the fuck killed him?
It's Yakov Smirnoff. He's got a wild name, too. Yakov Smirnoff. Yeah. Who the fuck killed him? It's Yakov Smirnoff.
He's got a wild name, too.
Yakov Smirnoff.
Yeah.
What's the kid's name?
The kid was Bertros Boutroskali.
Who killed RFK?
If we can look at that.
Who did they pin it on?
Birnoff Smirnoff.
What's his name?
Oh, there is.
Perpetrator Saran Saran.
Yeah, Saran Saran.
Duran Duran.
Duran Duran killed him.
Yeah.
I mean, the kid definitely was a deep level, fully charged Sandra D. Yeah. It's what can you do? Yeah. Saran Saran. Duran Duran killed him. Yeah. I mean, the kid definitely was a deep level, fully charged Sandra Dee.
Yeah, it's what can you do?
Yeah, Saran Saran.
This kid was a 24-year-old kid.
I mean, I don't buy any of it.
What's your take?
What do you think really happened, Yanni, based off the book that you read?
What happened?
What I think happened is JFK was killed by Johnson.
Lyndon B. Johnson.
Lyndon B. Johnson, and they set up the squeak.
They set up the squeak because think about it.
Nobody ever says they're a patsy if they kill someone.
They want credit.
They want credit.
Anyone who kills a president actually wants credit.
That's not the psychological profile of someone who kills a president to say, I'm just a patsy.
I'm being set up.
They go, yeah, I did it.
This is the reason why I did it.
This is my mission statement.
You know, the guy that killed John Lennon said he did it to end the 60s.
Right.
You know, so there's always a statement.
The guy who killed Lincoln jumped on the stage and said, you know, said Tyrannosaurus Rex.
Yeah.
You know, he spoke some Latin or whatever. Yeah. So it's like this guy says he's a patsy. Ever said, you know, said Tyrannosaurus Rex. Yeah. You know, he spoke some Latin or whatever.
Yeah.
So it's like, this guy says he's a patsy.
Whatever he said, yeah.
And then Jack Ruby.
He said, he jumped on stage and said, follow me on Patreon at patreon.com slash John Wilkes
Booth.
Yeah.
And then so obviously, and then they silence him, Jack Ruby, a guy dying of cancer.
Oh, that's a coincidence.
So Jack Ruby, a guy dying of cancer. Oh, that's a coincidence. So Jack Ruby killed.
So take a Jack Ruby is the guy who famously killed Lee Harvey Oswald in broad daylight in front of the media.
And then Jack Ruby died.
How many?
How long after Jack Ruby died?
Like he had a brain that he had cancer and he was dying.
And so he died like weeks or months or a year after that.
So that was very convenient.
Very convenient.
So and it's just convenient, too,
that he was able to just mosey right up on there and kill him.
Also, it's a coincidence, Johnson,
what I learned from the book,
Johnson and there's other sources,
Johnson hated Kennedy.
Right.
Everyone hated Kennedy.
And what's the reason?
Because he was a Catholic.
He was a dirty potato monkey.
Yeah.
So to these WASPs, you know, you think about it,
there's only been one non-wasp president.
That was Kennedy.
Being Irish back then was like...
Even Obama's a wasp.
Even Obama's mother was a wasp.
Yeah.
And the father was, he was a Muslim.
Wei Zhongzhen.
That's what it is.
That's what I hear.
Wei Zhongzhen.
From the Tea Party.
I'm kidding.
Obviously, he's not.
But he was just joking around.
Yeah, we're joking around.
Yeah, Kennedy was the first non-wasp president. Obama was the first non-U.S. citizen president. Yeah'm kidding. Obviously, he's not. We're just joking around. Kennedy was the first non-WAS president.
Obama was the first non-US
citizen president. Yeah, exactly.
Exactamundo. So that was a big deal.
They hate him. He was also an outsider.
Also, his father was a stone-cold
mafioso.
He was a bootlegger. His dad,
Joe Kennedy, and also
they actually stole the election with
mafia muscle.
So there was a lot of... He had a lot of enemies. And then on top of that, Joe Kennedy, and also they actually stole the election with mafia muscle. Right.
So there was a lot of, he had a lot of enemies.
And then on top of that, he was banging everyone.
I mean, he was a guy who was a complete, absolute sex addict.
Like, he could not keep his little potato monkey paws off the bus.
And there were no rubbers back then.
There were no rubbers back then.
So he might have a few kids floating around.
I mean, a kid could have whatever, whatever, but he was banging everybody,
banging Marilyn Monroe, banging everybody.
I mean, he appoints his brother, Robert Kennedy.
That's nepotism.
That's like what Trump's doing with his fucking son-in-law.
You know, that's like dictatorship.
Trump's tweeting at pizzerias.
Yeah, and then the Cuban Missile Crisis happened.
So I think Lyndon Johnson, who was appointed as vice president only to win the South,
it was a real political Machiavellian move where JFK's going,
look, we want to appeal to the South, get Texas, boom.
Also, he got killed where?
In Lyndon B. Johnson's state.
Texas.
Texas.
And also, Lyndon B. Johnson is the one who told him he's got to go campaign in Texas.
Interesting.
We got to go get my state. So he set him up. He had the most to go campaign in Texas. Interesting.
We got to go get my state.
So he set him up.
He had the most to gain.
It was a coup.
He put himself in power,
and he murdered Kennedy, who he fucking hated,
and also the establishment wanted him dead because after the Bay of Pigs fuck up,
you got to put someone down.
That's how the mafia rules go.
You open your fucking mouth.
Like me and you, it's
good we're not involved with fucking
mafiosos because you can't just
fuck things up. They just
put you down. You broke the fucking rules
Chrissy. We told you to come fucking do that.
By the way, can I ask you a question?
Is there anything funnier
than police surveillance tapes
of mafia guys in social clubs?
It's the funniest thing of all time. How many times do they say cocksucker?
Yeah, cocksucker.
Yeah.
Yeah.
I mean, those guys, and I don't even know why mafia guys
even have a top button on their shirt.
It is never buttoned.
They're always about four buttons down.
Yeah.
They just button their shirts halfway up, and yeah, it's just great.
Yeah, we would not be good in the mafias
because having a big mouth and a big ass ain't going to cut it.
Ain't going to cut it. Ain't going to cut it.
But anytime you listen to any of those surveillance tapes, the guys are as hilarious and animated as you think they were.
They're like, I'll put that fucking guy in the dirt.
You know?
Yeah.
Fucking cocksucker.
Fuck them all.
Yeah, fuck them all.
All right, so that's probably what you said is probably honestly what happened.
The good thing, I think there's a year coming up.
Who do you think killed him?
Marilyn Monroe's boyfriend?
Somebody got revenge because he did.
They say that him and Robert, they say Marilyn Monroe banged up with him.
First of all, Hollywood's a strange place.
If you make it to be the top star icon and you kill yourself,
it's like I don't want any part of that town.
Yeah, I don't want to be.
Because who'd she bang?
JFK, Joe DiMaggio.
Joe DiMaggio, Joe List.
No, they say Joe DiMaggio, she was married to Joe.
They say she banged JFK and RFK.
She banged both of them.
And then they had her killed to keep her quiet
because she was getting emotional and stuff like that.
And they were like, listen, Dame.
They called everyone Dame.
Dame, what's up, Dame?
I mean, the fucking glory days where you could just call a girl Dame.
Call a girl Dame, yeah.
I mean, yeah, listen, Dame.
Listen, fucking Dame.
Listen, see?
Yeah.
All right.
You don't talk unless you were spoken to, okay?
You're a Dame, and that's what you are.
Yeah. Can we just start talking like that again? Let's do dame and that's what you are. Yeah.
Can we just start
talking like that again?
Let's do it.
Let's bring it
right the hell back.
Listen, Venetia,
get me a coffee
and be quiet.
Yeah.
All right.
So yeah,
so that's what happened.
What the fuck do you think happened?
You're Irish Catholic.
I'm not a fucking expert.
I'm a Greek
talking about your business,
your people.
Look,
you tell me
you're a Catholic kid.
What happened? Was this a fucking priest coming back to get revenge business your people look you tell me you're a Catholic kid what happened
was this a fucking priest
coming back from
to get revenge
because he outed him
as a pedophile
what happened here
I think what happened
most likely
is based off
you know my life
and what happens
when you go down to Cuba
and Latin American countries
is what happened was
is he went down there
he hooked up with a Cubana chick
she got pissed off
climbed up to the top
of the fucking book Depository inallas and put two in his fucking dome piece
for not texting her back so that's what happened that's you know you've never heard that theory and
that is a good theory absolutely she fucking went down there and she fucking you know she hit she
hid the gun in her chunk like that and she just fucking assembled it at the top of the roof and
hit him with two to the head drank a bustelo and then just went home and went to c-town and bought fucking you know bought some
autos compoyo yeah and that's what it is there you go you have what it is there it is that's how you
have it this is conspiracy cuties i'm out of gas and here that's funny as our sign is us uh drinking
a couple smoothies right when kennedy's about to get assassinated. Just the artist, what's his name again?
Great guy.
Joey Dots.
Joseph Dots.
Joey Dots on Instagram.
Joseph Dots.
Joey Dots.
Yeah.
So there you go, conspiracy cuties.
There's the scoop.
He was killed by a Cuban Latina.
Es lo que es. We really hope you enjoyed that episode, whatever it was about.
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