History Hyenas with Chris Distefano and Yannis Pappas - Spinning the Wheel With the Matriarchy! May Bonus Calls!

Episode Date: June 7, 2020

The History Hyenas Chris Distefano and Yannis Pappas reach out to their fans thru Zoom video conferencing and things get wild! Secrets are told, feet are shown and we find out why Hyenas fans are the ...craziest most fun bunch of screwed in kids out there!Want more Hyena content? Check out www.patreon.com/bayridgeboys where things get really WILD!Follow us!: 🙆🏼‍♂️🐕🙆🏻‍♂️🙆🏼‍♂️Chris Distefano on Instagram, Twitter, website🙆🏻‍♂️Yannis Pappas on Instagram, Twitter, website🐕History Hyenas on Instagram, Twitter, website Subscribe to the poddy woddy on YouTube, iTunes, Spotify, and HH Clips

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Starting point is 00:00:35 ស្រូវតែលាប់ប្រូវតែលាប់ប្រូវតែលាប់ប្រូវតែលាប់ប្រូវតែលាប់ប្រូវតែលាប់ប្រូវតែលាប់ប្រូវតែលាប់ប្រូវតែលាប់ប្រូវតែលាប់ប្រូវតែលាប់ប្រូវតែលាប់ប្រូវតែលាប់ប្រូវតែលាប់ប្រូវតែលាប់ប្រូវតែលាប់ប្រូវតែលាប់ប្រូវតែល Yeah, welcome to the Hipstrahainians. I don't know what it is. The 25, for the $25 members, we love you, appreciate you. Thank you so much. Happy fucking hyenas. Nothing matters anymore. I've got my hair up in a bun. I'm a samurai. I'm ready to suck
Starting point is 00:00:45 a dick. Let's get Lisa Johnson here, the queen of the matriarch. I'm going to go pay you. Can I get a hairpin? I want to put my hair in like that to match Chrissy. Oh, hold on one second. Let me go. Lisa's mic's on right now. Hi, Lisa.
Starting point is 00:01:04 Hey, how's it going? Yo, what's up lisa johnson what's up what the camera can't you put the camera on or are you gonna pull it i'm trying to adjust my settings now because uh let's see hold on one second we want to see we want to see what atl looks like what yeah? Yeah, what is going on? How are you doing during this pandemic, girl? I mean, I'm working full time. I mean, it hasn't slowed down for me. So all of you. What are you doing?
Starting point is 00:01:34 What are you making, Franks and Beans? Well, no, I'm making fried chicken. Remember, I'm black. Oh, true, true, true, true, true. True, true, true. There's nothing wrong with fried chicken. Remember, I'm black. True, true, true. There's nothing wrong with fried chicken. Fried chicken is delish. What do you do for work, Lisa?
Starting point is 00:01:53 Lisa, do you know where my wife can get some fried chicken? She's right there. All she keeps asking for is KFC. Lisa. Lisa's out of here. Lisa just haybirded us. She haybirded us. She's out of here. Lisa just haybirded us. She haybirded us. She's still there.
Starting point is 00:02:11 I don't know why she stopped talking. My wife's biggest pregnancy craving has been KFC consistent. Would you say KFC or French dip sandwich? We'll go back to Lisa once she gets herself situated. Lisa Johnson said she's back. Yeah, but number one one the most you've asked for do you think it's kfc french dip or mozzarella sticks oh lately it's mozzarella yeah the fact you just said mozzarella sticks is you're a fucking greek ff so thank god mrs pop has corrected you she said recently the most thing she's asked for is mozzarella sticks, but overall, KFC.
Starting point is 00:02:48 Here comes Lisa. Sorry about that, guys. No, it's okay. Yes. Yes. Put the mic on. You're fucking Franks and Beats. Yes.
Starting point is 00:03:04 Yes. There it is. Wow. I'm'm here what are you doing you go for a little exercise yes i'm going for a walk because i'm going crazy in the house well yeah and that and also you can't you can't have a call with the hiatus in front of other family members that's just not going to work yeah yeah fair fair yeah they already think i'm off so that's just really doubling down on it for sure plus lisa you probably don't want to show any of what your block looks like because chris the teacher's in here yeah well he's according to my video i mean he's been mailing me so i mean he knows where i'm knows where i live yeah he knows chris the teacher's
Starting point is 00:03:40 in chat everything uh that's an understat But yes, he just needs to shut the fuck up. So Chris the teacher, if you can hear me, shut the fuck up. Lisa, what do you think of our hair? What do you think of the man bun? I mean, good look. Is it fumes or no fumes? Oh, it's cute. It's cut.
Starting point is 00:03:58 Yeah. Yes. Yes, you definitely could suck some dick with that. So you can really get the work done. I got the hair up. I'm ready to get on my knees. That's like a separate tier, right? That's like what, for $200, you can video chat you guys sucking dick?
Starting point is 00:04:12 Well, I don't know. Well, right now, right now, right now we have that at $1,000 level. But if this pandemic keeps going on, then yeah, we'll knock that down to $200. I mean, Giannis has got a baby on the way. I mean, I'm'm gonna do what i need to do for the matriarch and if that means get my mouth around some cock with the hair up for the for the new baby i'll do it yeah if you gotta just you know just uh locate a jaw hey go for it but congratulations yeah i heard that heard the news about the pregnancy so that's awesome
Starting point is 00:04:38 thank you thank you we were saying yeah when you when you cut out my wife's cravings have been recently mozzarella strips, overall KFC. What were your cravings when you were pregnant, Lisa? What were you eating? You know, I liked apples and cheese. I was, I don't know, I was craving like vegetables. It was weird. When you're pregnant, you just turn into you turn into one of vanity's white girlfriends yeah basically i was woke and dope um yeah it was it was weird like i had i
Starting point is 00:05:11 didn't i didn't really crave anything um out the ordinary it was actually my fiance he craved um like uh just weird shit so he would make like weird concoctions and so he probably gained more weight than i did so well you look you look girl you're beautiful you're fierce you're getting hey birded wait a second hold on oh my wife has a question she said your cravings sound like you had a girl did you have a girl i did have a girl she had a girl and i had tons of heartburn and she had a lot of hair too so all that shit's true yeah nice so my wife thinks it's a boy because all she wants is French dip sandwiches, mozzarella sticks, and KFC.
Starting point is 00:05:50 Oh, man. Well, have fun with that. Salty. I think it's a girl. There's no way there's enough testosterone in your sperm to make a man. I don't think. Because if I had girls, you know, I'm only having girls. So, you know, we got the same testosterone level, which is almost zero.
Starting point is 00:06:06 Yeah, because as long as my kid is trans, I'll take it. Yeah, your kid's definitely going to mellow you out, Gianna. So I think it doesn't matter what gender. So it's all going to be good. We love you, but we got a long list. We want to kick it off with the queen of the matriarchy. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I know, I know.
Starting point is 00:06:23 All right. Bye, guys. All right. Bye. Bye. Bye. kick it off with the queen of the matriarchy yeah yeah yeah i know i know all right bye guys all right bye bye she gets it now she's got to finish off that walk it's funny that we're gonna i like this because we're gonna see wow erica there she is wow what's up wow girl? Where's my shirt? Wow, the waistcoat. Oh, wow. There it is. Hey, girl.
Starting point is 00:06:49 Hey, how are y'all doing? Where do you live? I'm in Texas. Right, your state's open. Tomorrow, yeah. Are you going to go? Are you going to hang out with Mike Emojiface? Babe, the BAPI student shit my eye.
Starting point is 00:07:06 The places that I want to go, they're requiring people to wear masks and gloves. I'm like, you know what? No. Now, it's funny to do this to see their faces because, yeah, you'll get cracked. Hey, I got this. I put some lipstick on
Starting point is 00:07:24 to match my shirt. No, I'm kidding'm kidding i'm kidding you look great yeah he was that was a compliment he was saying you he was he said you'd get cracked so it means your peace thank you what what uh let me ask you a question what um what's been your favorite moment of the so far favorite moments we like to ask people that oh well whatever yeah i mean i like waking up in the morning and hearing y'all just gab so you like wep on the morning i do it's fun there you go all right what are you gonna do when the last question what are you gonna do when quarantine's over what are you gonna do what's the first thing i'm gonna drop some acid yeah great great are you working now are you just are you at home what are you doing yeah i work from home i'm a coder yeah
Starting point is 00:08:11 dude fucking i'm telling you i see some room you and mikey you both live in texas you both coders what about you know hanging out with mike emoji face i'm already married oh you are is your husband a piece yeah yeah he works in olin gasfield so he he works um he's a real man he works in college station he works like two weeks off at a time here for a week he's a real real man i like that what city of texas are you What city in Texas are you? Wake City in Arlington where the Cowboys play. Nice. Nice.
Starting point is 00:08:48 Yeah. When did you start listening to the hyenas? Who turned you on? I think it was, I want to say it was when y'all did a, when y'all were on Tim Dillon's podcast. Yeah. Okay. Yeah, you're smart. I knew you'd be a Dillon fan because you're smart. You're a coder. We definitely, yeah, we didn't get you from Bobby Lee's. We got you from Dillon's podcast. Yeah. Okay. Yeah, you're smart. I knew you'd be a Dillon fan
Starting point is 00:09:05 because you're smart. You're a coder. We definitely, yeah. We didn't get you from Bobby Lee's. We got you from Dillon. I look like I'm getting fat. This quarantine is fucking retarded. No, you look great.
Starting point is 00:09:14 You look great. I don't think you look fat at all. I think you look great. Venetia is saying, Venetia is saying you look great, girl. Work it. Work it, girl. Venetia, does she look great?
Starting point is 00:09:23 How does she look, V? Looks gorgeous. Yeah. She's gorgeous. Yeah. Whoa, Honey Bubbles is jacked. She's fucking jacked. Yeah. All right, boo. Well, listen, we got to go. We got the Hey Bird time limit. Thank you so much for being a fan and for the continued support.
Starting point is 00:09:37 Bye, y'all. Bye. Bye. And we got Andrea Gagliani coming in next. Oh, Andrea Gagliani. Yo, Andrea Gagliani Coming in next Oh Andrea Gagliani Yo Andrea Gagliani Let me ask you a question Yeah Yeah what's up Andrea
Starting point is 00:09:51 Is that garlic slice Cut your mics off You're Franks and Beans You gotta Okay I'm not Franks and Beans anymore Hello Hello Now where you calling in
Starting point is 00:10:02 Where you calling in from Sacramento Sacramento California California Yeahramento what a shit city i know i love the capitals i'm chrissy capitals but make no mistake you got homeless people that set shit on fire under the river all day yes yes that's their job yep now did you make sauce today or what's going on i um yeah i made sauce i worked a little bit i got a lot of things going on over big big things are you i have a question for you chris yes uh my brother and i're gonna go see you in seattle hopefully is
Starting point is 00:10:36 your show still on right now right now it's still on um who knows what's gonna happen but as of now yeah neptune theater it's still on so yeah we'll we'll come we'll have a good time mask up glove up and uh what do you think of my hair what do you think of my hair in the hair bun is it yes or no I think it looks uh beautiful is it you have two there right one in the front one in the back I got one in the back yeah so if someone were to run a train on you you know want to grab on the front and the back so So that's very, very good. That's no problem. Yeah. Jonas, how's your dog? My dog is fine. I paid $1,000 to find out that she has an irritated stomach
Starting point is 00:11:11 and must have gotten to some poison. Oh, wonderful. That's what it is. You should be asking me how I'm doing. How are you doing? How's your wifey? I'm doing okay, but I'm $1,000 down. So I was better before.
Starting point is 00:11:22 But I had to take my dog because she'd been thrown up for a month. But wifey's good. She's craving KFC. I'm trapped in the house with a pregnant woman. I mean, I'm psyched. We're on the same cycle
Starting point is 00:11:33 and we're eating the same shit. Andrea, listen, before we let you go, what's been your favorite moment of the podcast? I like your episode on Michelangelo.
Starting point is 00:11:44 I think you guys were the silliest in that it was really funny and very good yeah we get yeah we support we support fellow gays okay have you turned people on to the podcast you telling friends yes I'm telling everybody I actually do it at work too
Starting point is 00:11:57 I don't turn off my speakers so all my roommates here in my cubicle alright Andrea we gotta go we gotta hate you but thank you so much for the support. Thank you. See you in October. All right. Bye. We've got Jay
Starting point is 00:12:09 at Only Crack Open C-Town Crashers. I meet at Banco Popular. There you go. Wow. Turn the mic on. I mean, our fans are Frank's beats.
Starting point is 00:12:20 My fucking dad. Here you go. What's going on, guys? What's up? Wow, you got a chest hat. Do you know Zach Isis? I don't, but I'm also Puerto Rican and can't speak Spanish, so I'm halfway there. There you go.
Starting point is 00:12:31 And you got a Hitler mustache. What's that about? I do have a Hitler mustache. It's my quarantine stash going on right now. Where are you, guy? Where do you live? I live in Jersey. Wow.
Starting point is 00:12:40 I mean, if Jersey was a guy, you look like Jersey. Oh, fuck out. I'm from the Bronx originally, but we did the pilgrimage over the GWB. Oh, you know. Now, you got beautiful teeth. Did you go to Dr. Harvey Spencer's dentistry in South Carolina? No, no, no. It's just straight braces, and I don't fucking eat snacks or anything like that.
Starting point is 00:13:01 You don't yawn into snacks? No, no, no, no. Now, are you a kid who usually gets a fresh cut and you haven't had one in a while and that's why you're wearing a hat? Nope. I do that shit myself.
Starting point is 00:13:10 Yeah, but listen, kid. You got a nice fucking head. It's nicely shaped, so don't worry about it. You look good bald. Thank you. I like it. I mean, yeah,
Starting point is 00:13:18 but you also got a shaped head. You got a Hitler statue. You got chest tattoos. I need you to stay away from Williamsburg, Brooklyn because I feel like you'll be up to no good. Nah, I don't fuck with Williamsburg.
Starting point is 00:13:27 I stick to the Bronx, Kingsbridge. Yeah, Kingsbridge all day. So what have you been doing? You been moving your monkey or you got a piece? What's going on? You want to show your piece? I'm working from home and shit like that. What do you do working from home? I work for PIX11. Oh, really? The news station?
Starting point is 00:13:43 Yeah, the news station. What do you do? I write the news station yeah the news what do you do i write the news you what yeah wow i thought you were on parole no no i look like i'm on parole but i write the news holy shit okay listen bubba's we gotta hate burt you so real quick what's been your favorite moment of the potty waddy yeah ask him whatever go bob you guys talking shit to bobby lee is probably one of the funniest things ever. Yeah. Yeah. That kid's great.
Starting point is 00:14:06 All right. Jay, I'll see you later, Bubba. Yeah, we'll see you. We'll see you on the news, guy. Yeah, write stories for us. He's got nice teeth, man. He's got good fucking nice teeth. He's got good teeth. Yeah, you can fuck it.
Starting point is 00:14:16 I'll put one off your uvula. Bye. We've got Steve Mustache. Oh, Steve Mustache. Yes. Yeah, this kid's coming in With his mic ready to go I mean now that he's got his mic
Starting point is 00:14:33 On his camera When Frank beats Fats I mean it's either They're coming in Franks or they're coming in beats There we go Yo you're a funny funny kid What's the deal do you do comedy or what? As a hobby.
Starting point is 00:14:47 I'm not one of these guys who's just doing 30 things and saying that I'm doing comedy for real. I'm just doing it as a hobby for now. Are you a potato monkey or a sauce monkey? I can't tell. No, I'm a- Are you a $3 bill? You sound a little like a $3 bill. I'm a squeak.
Starting point is 00:15:05 Full fume squeak. What are you, a $3 bill? You sound a little like a $3 bill. I'm a squeak. Full-fumed squeak. What are you, a $3 bill? I'm $3. Oh, wow. Okay. Yeah. Okay, so you're Italian, Irish. What are you, sauce monkey or potato monkey?
Starting point is 00:15:16 I'm Portuguese, so I'm a codfish monkey. Wow. Sergio Chacon is Portuguese. Yeah, yeah. Wow. Good for you, dude. So where do you live? Are you coming out of Jersey, you said?
Starting point is 00:15:26 No, no, no, no. I live at Squeak City just outside of Toronto. I'm Canadian. Wow, you're Canadian. Yeah. You're a fucking Trudeau is what you are. I am. You guys actually might know a buddy of mine.
Starting point is 00:15:39 He does stand-up in New York. What's his name? Alex Pavone. Alex Pavone. Oh, yeah. No, we know him. Snoozer. We know him. Nice name. Yeah, I. No, we know him. Snoozer. We know him.
Starting point is 00:15:48 Nice kid. Yeah, I mean, that kid's not going to make it. But, yeah. I mean, God bless him, but you know, it's just what can you do? Lights are out. The shots are firing. He's a nice kid, but I mean...
Starting point is 00:16:03 No, he's a nice kid, you know.. The nice kid. No, he's a nice kid, you know. Nice kid. Nice kid. Nice kid. No, funny, funny kid. I'm just kidding around. Yeah, just kidding. No, Steve, what you've done for the podcast, I mean, that video was a 10 out of 10.
Starting point is 00:16:13 Thank you. How long have you been listening and what's been your favorite moment? I've been listening since probably January or December. It was whenever you guys did the Tiger Belly podcast. Right. And that's what kind of put me on was whenever you guys did the Tiger Belly podcast. Right. And that's what kind of put me on hit to you guys. And I've listened to basically every single YouTube video you had out. And favorite moment is any time you guys talk about Tony Tiger.
Starting point is 00:16:34 Tony Tiger. I fucking love Tony Tiger. Tony Tiger. We haven't talked about him in a while, but we'll bring him back up. Oh, please. Yeah. All right, Steve. We appreciate it, guy.
Starting point is 00:16:44 What do you do for a living, but we'll bring it back up. Oh, please. We appreciate it, Guy. What do you do for a living, Guy? I work in the same industry as Chrissy Flyballs, or Patty Flyballs. Patty Flyballs? I ain't gonna say, just because if my employer sees that
Starting point is 00:16:58 it ain't a character piece, I look up to them. Wow, for a firefighter, you're a squeak. I mean, yeah, you're a fucking little squeaky wiki. Um, all right, Bob is, well, thanks. Thanks so much for, for being a fan. And we really appreciate all, all the support. Yo, Steve, can you make us more, make us more videos, man? Oh, I'm, I'm already brainstorming one for WEPA and I have, I have more ideas for others. You're the man, brother. Thank you guys.
Starting point is 00:17:23 Thank you. All right. All right. We have Chrissy Gets Erections and Where's No Protection. Nice. 10 out of 10 names. Wow. Wow, cuz, you look like you're a fucking... You look like you're an Aztec. No. No, I'm 50% you with
Starting point is 00:17:41 you, the Reich, and 50% with Belize. Now, were you born a woman or were you always a man? Oh, definitely a woman. Oh, yeah. You're a little transparent. Because, yeah, if Britney's wife wasn't around, he'd crack you open.
Starting point is 00:17:57 I mean, if Giannis' wife. Well, Britney's wife is Giannis, yeah. Appreciate it. Yeah, now, what's been your favorite moment so far of the quarantine? Of quarantine? I mean of the podcast. I'm sorry. The podcast?
Starting point is 00:18:12 Probably the Jim Gaffigan episode. I laughed really hard at that one. Oh, you're Canadian too, huh? Yep. Yeah. Now you're moving the monkey or are you cracking someone out? Both. I got to be like – Canadian kids got a lot of glue that they got to get out.
Starting point is 00:18:27 Yeah. Now, let me ask you a question. Do you ever move your monkey a little bit? Do you ever go a little point to Justin Trudeau or what? Of course. Who doesn't? You ever bang out of Trudeau? You ever bang out of Trudeau?
Starting point is 00:18:37 I haven't, no. Oh, okay. Yeah, no, you're a good kid. I mean, what are you going to eat for dinner tonight? Probably some sauce monkey food. Yeah, some, you're a good kid. I mean, what are you going to eat for dinner tonight? Probably some sauce monkey food. Yeah, some spaghettios. You have any questions for us? Ask us something, guy.
Starting point is 00:18:54 I honestly don't. Just psyched to be talking to you guys. Yeah, you have the kind of face and vibe where I don't want you around any type of automatic machine guns because you just look like you're a sprayer and you're, I don't want you around any type of automatic machine guns because you just look like you're a sprayer and I don't know. Where did you hear about us from? Did you come from, are you fucking some of the shit from, you know what dude?
Starting point is 00:19:13 Where are you from? My friend sent me and my first episode that I saw of you guys was on Fighter and the Kid. Oh, okay. Fighter and the Kid. Nice. Those guys are great. Yeah. Have you been enjoying the potty since yeah of course i just joined the patreon like two weeks ago but i've been in uh watching the potty since i found out i appreciate now i know you guys get taxed pretty heavy how are you able
Starting point is 00:19:38 to afford the patreon you're dealing drugs you got a real job well Well, right now, I'm on quarantine, so we have the benefit that they're giving us money for. But I was, I did have a job, so. There you go. Appreciate it. We appreciate you. You're a loyal,
Starting point is 00:19:54 high-ranking member of the matriarchy. We thank you for your service, guy. Of course. Thanks, Bubba. I'll continue to support. Thank you.
Starting point is 00:20:03 As long as you continue to make me laugh. I will. Yeah, all right, man. Yeah, so go let your grandma out of the freezer, you fucking psycho. See you later. Bye. Get this kid out of here.
Starting point is 00:20:15 Kid had a great name, too. Great Patreon. I love that kid. He's a good name. I mean, our fans are all over the map, cuz. They're all over the map. Now we got Chris Longcox. It's like spin the wheel.
Starting point is 00:20:26 Whoever comes up next. Look at this kid. Yeah. Look at this fucking FF. I mean, this kid's wild looking. Oh, I know this kid. I think I know this kid. What's his name?
Starting point is 00:20:34 Chrissy Longcox what? What a tongue puncher fart box. I mean, you're hilarious, cuz. You look like a painter. Now, who you with? Who you with? My girlfriend and my dog wow now i met you in canada right you're minolis's friend yeah yeah yeah you didn't even know this is legally retarded 100 he's he's absolutely legally retarded i mean in america in canada i think he's just
Starting point is 00:21:02 frank's beans yeah i got his shirt on right now. Yeah, there it is. Girl penis. Girl penis. Hilarious. Yeah, and that's your wife there that took the video of you moving your monkey to us on the bed listening to the peace song. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:21:14 Yeah. Yeah, she's a peace. And so is your dog. Who gets, does both your girlfriend and your dog get cracked, or how does it work? Yeah, so actually, it's a funny story. We brought the dog to the vet yesterday. We thought it was a boy, and it turns out it was a girl. Wow.
Starting point is 00:21:29 Yeah, he's been cracking the dog, and at least now he knows it's not gay. At least he knows it's not gay, which is good. Does it fumes or no fumes for the dog? No fumes, yes. Wow, nice. No fumar, eh? No fumar. I want to ask your girlfriend, does he got fumes?
Starting point is 00:21:46 Only sometimes. Do you listen to the podcast as well? What do you think of the podcast? Are you a listener or is it just him? Yeah, yeah, I am. She loves it. Okay, yeah, because it's interesting that we have couples who one listens and one doesn't, and then the partner that doesn't listen thinks that their
Starting point is 00:22:01 partner is going clinically insane. Yeah. No, I think we're both a little clinically insane. you guys you he's you're a comic right yeah i am yeah how's it going it's fucking rough yeah yeah my favorite part of the podcast now though is uh my favorite memory is you guys tearing up alex pavone yeah yeah no he Yeah, no, he's a good kid. He's a good kid. Nice kid. Yeah, yeah. Nice kid.
Starting point is 00:22:28 Nice kid. You know, you want to do comedy, you might want to think of doing one thing. What's that? Get the fuck out of Hamilton. Well, no, I lived in Vancouver, and I just had to move back. I was going to be opening for you, Chris. I emailed you.
Starting point is 00:22:42 Yeah, and now you're an essential worker. back. I was going to be opening for you, Chris. I emailed you. Yeah, and now you're an essential worker. Yeah, cuz, I wish, I wish you, I wish, as soon as those dates get back on the books, please, I would love to work with you and we'll fucking hang and we'll go wild. Yeah, yeah, I'll email you. Great kid.
Starting point is 00:22:57 Great fucking kid and I'm going to tickle his mustache a little bit. How's the fucking club doing in Hamilton? Is it still open? Yeah, it just got broken into Really? It was probably the owner, Rick Bronson The guy with the huge coke head No, no, this is a different club, the Levity
Starting point is 00:23:13 Oh, Levity, okay All right, Bubbas, well listen We gotta hate Bert here, but we really appreciate the support And thank you so much See ya Bye guys Good kid. Uh-oh, it's Brady with, what's his name?
Starting point is 00:23:28 It's Brady with two T's. Brady with two T's. Wow, look at this kid. Wow. This kid's wild. He's the definition of a potato monkey. Wow. Look at this kid's beard.
Starting point is 00:23:38 What's up, fellas? Because you got fumes. You like it? Just kidding, Chris. I was going to put a bow tie right here, but it's not long enough yet. I mean, the kid's got a fucking... Look at the kid's background. He's got a clown mask and fucking Jason mask.
Starting point is 00:23:51 You're a wild kid. Yeah, cuz, my first question. When did you get out of jail? Six years ago. Yeah, there you go. I knew it. Do you drive a truck? What's that? Do you drive a truck? Nah, that? Do you drive a truck? Nah, I got a Jeep. You like that?
Starting point is 00:24:07 Nice. Wow, but this kid's got crazy masks. Are those real heads? Yeah, they're all real. Benatty, you want to go on a date with this kid or no? I don't think he's Greek. He's not Greek. Now, what are those, guy?
Starting point is 00:24:22 You make those? Nah, it's a little hobby, I guess. Just collecting weird shit. Chicks love it. Yeah, I'm sure they do. Yeah, it looks romantic. Where do you live, Guy? Collegeville, right outside Philly.
Starting point is 00:24:36 Oh, right outside Philly. Nice. Now, if we go upstairs, is that your mother's apartment? Yeah. She lives downstairs. I live upstairs. There you go. That's how it does in Philly. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:24:47 Are you an essential worker? What are you doing? Yeah, I'm working right now remotely. I design spiral stairs. Oh, spiral stairs. Nice. Nice. Do you have a hoogie or what's going on?
Starting point is 00:24:59 Yeah, I got a Wawa right down the street. About to go pick up a meatball hoogie. Yeah. Yeah. And you have all the water you need and everything? You drinking the last of your beer? Drinking a, you'll like this, Chrissy. Got a little Friday's Long Island iced tea. Never had one of these.
Starting point is 00:25:17 There you go. Right out of a can. Liquor stores are closed, though, so I got to kind of think outside the box. Yeah, cuz. Well, listen listen you dip you look like a kid who dips i do not i smoke cigarettes i don't dip yeah you're smoking and then your mom calls you and says it's time to come home she actually just takes a broom and hits the ceiling yeah there you go i was excited to go to the grammar c show man i'm uh yeah
Starting point is 00:25:42 forward to getting this rescheduled so we can see you guys live. We're going to get it rescheduled. Yeah, we're going to get it rescheduled. We just don't have a date yet. I mean, who knows? It's all about what the squeak Dr. Fauci says is okay, you know? I see we just do it. Let's fucking do it, dude.
Starting point is 00:25:55 Listen, we got to hey-bird you, but we want to know what's been your favorite moment of the potty-wotty so far? Anytime Tim Dillon makes an appearance, of course. Also, I saw a Rogan post about how he's the new Hey Bird, but I haven't heard too much about that. But I'm looking forward to seeing what his response is. If he ever sees it.
Starting point is 00:26:16 Well, the only way he'll see it is if you guys take Hey Bird. So we're only as powerful as you guys let us be. Oh, hell yeah. You guys got something great, man. I enjoy it every day. Thank you, brother. All right, fellas. All right us be. Oh, hell yeah. You guys got something great, man. I enjoy it every day. Thank you, brother. All right, fellas. All right, Bob.
Starting point is 00:26:28 Thank you. Peace. Good kid. Good kid. Good, great kid. He's got a bunch of clown masks on the wall. I mean, the kid's a good kid, you know? I mean, I wouldn't trust him farther than I could throw him,
Starting point is 00:26:36 but he's a good kid. All right, who we got next? Senior's favorite six-year-old wiener. I mean, look at this kid. My senior's favorite six-year-old wiener. I mean, this kid. It's Mike Feeney. Yeah, look at this kid. I mean, favorite six-year-old wiener. I mean, this kid. It's Mike Feeney. Yeah, look at this kid.
Starting point is 00:26:46 I mean, this kid is a pedophile's wet dream. I mean, wow. Look at this kid is the definition of a fish stick. You're a fucking fish stick, cuz. Cuz, what's going on? What are you doing? Nothing much, man. I'm stuck in New York City during this quarantine,
Starting point is 00:27:03 so I'm just doing what I can to not get too fat. Cuz, you got the camera too close to your face. Cuzzy, your jaw is permanently out. Like, my, you're just permanently in a character piece. Check this underbite out.
Starting point is 00:27:21 Yeah, cuz, you just permanently got the jaw out. Where are you in New York City, cuz? I'll come over. So I'm in the Lower East Side. Wow, I could walk to your house. Cuz, I'll bang you out. Oh, fuck, I just got my antibodies tested for yesterday, so I'll let you know in a few days.
Starting point is 00:27:38 Yeah, I got no antibodies, cuz, unfortunately. Ah, shit. Yeah, what do you do, man? What do you do in New York um so I work in a basically finance industry keep it uh you know nice and simple so you're what they call a non-essential worker right now uh essentially yes yeah because I mean I gotta be honest with you you're white oh I'm fucking I'm hell's a ghost right now, man. It's, what, April 30th? I mean, by that, this time
Starting point is 00:28:08 normally I'm looking like Yanni. Got a nice tan going, but, you know. Where are you from originally? Born and raised in Jersey. Oh, born and raised in Jersey? Nice. Hey, Bert's actually calling me right now. Yeah. Did you wrestle in high school? Is that where you, cauliflower ear?
Starting point is 00:28:24 Oh, no I do We get to We do not have to Yeah, I can tell you Yeah, you're gonna You'll fuck somebody up, no? I like my chances, yeah
Starting point is 00:28:34 Yeah, do you got a big What size is your piece? Average at best Yeah Do you got roommates? Do you got roommates or no? I'm living on my own now My friend's been staying with me for a few weeks.
Starting point is 00:28:47 He's in the National Guard, actually. He just got called in. Oh, wow. Now, yeah. One of the boys. Thank you for your service. He's the type of kid that in a bar, like, if a fight breaks out, one of his buddies, he goes, like, he's the type of kid that goes, hey, man, that's one of my buddies.
Starting point is 00:29:00 He calls him my buddy. He goes, that's my buddy. He goes, let's just stay calm. Let's keep it cool, man. Just, dude, keep it cool. And the guy's going, fuck you, dude. Fucking look at this nerd. And then the next thing you know, he's in a figure four leg lock,
Starting point is 00:29:13 and he's got a broken leg. Exactly. When you're at the bar, it's like you never have to worry about, you know, the loud, chest-puffing guys. It's always like the quiet guys. Right. Are you laying in a love sack? What is that? I am. This is a love sack. Is it always like the quiet guys. Right. Are you laying in a love sack? What is that? I am.
Starting point is 00:29:26 This is a love sack. Is it really? Yeah, yeah. It's like a six-foot one or some shit. Wow, you'll get cracked in the love sack. We gotta hit Bertie now, but what's going on? Are you gonna get any more new tattoos on your chest? We'll see. Maybe after this quarantine's over.
Starting point is 00:29:42 Yeah. How many times have you been moving that average piece every day? You move the monkey a lot? Oh, yeah, it varies. Anywhere from, you know, one, three, then I'll go on, like, a five-day drive. That's my discipline. You know, I like it. All right, Bubba's.
Starting point is 00:29:57 Well, thank you for your service. Thanks for being a high-ranking non-toot. We appreciate it, guys. All right, man. Thank you, guys. The laughs are so important during this time, so you know, guys. Thank you, guys. Laughter is so important during this time. So, you know, just keep it up, guys. That was fucking gay. No kidding. Dude, it's always the kids like that when he comes in.
Starting point is 00:30:15 Wow, look at him. I mean, it's Andrew Cunanan. We got a Sandra Dee coming in. Did he show his passport? I thought that was Andrew Cunanan. Who is this kid? It's Chris. I'm Chris, bro. I'm from Brooklyn. Yo, what up, Chris?
Starting point is 00:30:30 Wow, the kid's from Brooklyn? What neighborhood? Carroll Gardens. So you're a sauce monkey, or what's going on? Yeah, sauce monkey, Spanish conquistador, you know, stuff like that. Yeah, he's what you call Brooklyn mutt. Puerto Rican. Yeah, yeah. Benatia's a little puyong for this kid right now.
Starting point is 00:30:45 Oh, Benatia is definitely moving her monkey to this. Oh, but he's not Greek, though. Okay. But he's close enough. He's got Italian and Puerto Rican and you know she likes Puerto Ricans. He came to the show, guys. Oh, she remembers you. I remember a lot of the people.
Starting point is 00:31:01 Is that the kid that was asleep? No, I was the one that answered the question and Giannis made fun of my voice. So, yeah. Is that the kid that was asleep? You remember the fucking hot kid with the gold eyes? I was the one that answered the question, and Giannis made fun of my voice. So, yeah. Chris, why don't you just do us all a favor here right now with the rest of your time? Why don't you just shut the fuck up and take your shirt off? Okay? I have one of you guys' shirts on.
Starting point is 00:31:19 Wow, I'm 14. Yo, cuz, are you enjoying WEPA in the morning? Yeah, I actually am. It helps me get started for work, so yeah. I like the idea. Are you high right now? I mean, you got no energy, Cuz. You need to pick up the pace.
Starting point is 00:31:34 No, I'm sorry. No, I'm not. I'm not. Yeah. I mean, what are you doing? Did you work out today? What did you do today? No, I haven't worked out yet.
Starting point is 00:31:41 I usually do that after work. You know, some body weight stuff because the gyms are closed. What do you do? What do you work? What do you do? I'm still in grad school, so I'm an worked out yet. I usually do that after work, you know, some body weight stuff because the gyms are closed. What do you do? What do you work? What do you do? I'm still in grad school, so I'm an intern. Wow. Yeah, I'm an internal audit, so, you know, fun stuff.
Starting point is 00:31:54 Because we got smart fans, grad school kids. We do. And let me tell you something. You're going to be a winner in life because you're smart, you got good energy, and Venetia is looking at you right now, and I'll tell you, I'll be honest with you, you're a good looking fucking kid. Thank you, guys. Yeah, how old are you? 23.
Starting point is 00:32:09 Wow, perfect age. You're fucking like a nice, ripe banana. Carol Garner, there's no good pizza in Cali. Well, you can go to Lucali's. Yeah, my friend's uncle owns that. Wow, so you're a little mobbed up. Yeah, he got a – so, yeah, a kid got stabbed a few times running down Court Street. Is he okay?
Starting point is 00:32:31 Yeah, he's good now, yeah. I forgot that that was a story. Yeah, that was bad. You got roommates or you live alone? Yeah, I got two roommates, my mom and my brother. Oh, wow. So now, yeah, Venetia just shut the door. She just left the meeting.
Starting point is 00:32:42 She's like, nope. Yeah, but, Mark, you know, he's Italian. You said you were Italian, right? Half Italian? Yeah. So, I mean, even if the kid was like 44, there's a good chance his roommate is his mom, you know? Yeah, you could tell I'm from Brooklyn because of the poster.
Starting point is 00:32:55 What is it? Oh, yeah, Scarface, living with his mom. I mean, if an Italian kid tells you he's living with his mom, he could be 24 or 44. It's all the same. Well, listen, we go. Italian kids love their mom the same. Well, listen, we got to hate Bird. We got to hate Bird, you bubbies. We got more to get to, but we really appreciate you being a fan, my friend.
Starting point is 00:33:11 Yeah, I love you guys. Keep up with the content. Okay. All right. Venity is going to DM you right after this. All right. I'll see you later. Yeah, I can't get cracked open.
Starting point is 00:33:21 Who's the next FF? Who do we got next? I love this because it's all about how random. Who's popping in next? Corey Bergstrom. This is a white kid. White. White.
Starting point is 00:33:32 Yeah, I like this better than the calls because we get to see what they look like. Wow, this kid's got dyed hair. I mean, this kid's a fucking out of work DJ. No, you should. Surprisingly. I mean, because from sitting down, even from sitting down, we can tell 100% you are a squeak. Make no mistake, like five-two squeak. And twin brother, identical twin brother, the same, man.
Starting point is 00:33:56 I mean, you're a fucking sauce monkey squeak, Ben. Come here, check out this fucking little FF. Who's this squeak? Yeah, look at this kid. Are they identical twin brothers? Look at this. They're twins. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:34:11 You guys look like Mario and Luigi. You look like the Luigi brothers. Yeah, thanks. My firefighter buddies were pissed about some of the Atlanta 14 stuff. Yeah, he's a firefighter. Oh, because you're from Chicago? Are you guys from Chicago? Yeah, we are. fireman. Oh, because you're from Chicago? Are you guys from Chicago? Yeah, we are.
Starting point is 00:34:26 We are. We are. But, yeah. And I ordered a fucking ladder 14 shirt. And I don't know if you guys outsourced the fucking Wuhan, China, but it has to come in. I know. I don't know.
Starting point is 00:34:39 Maybe it accidentally got sent to Megan Rapinoe because I thought it looked like you. Is that your son? Cute you. Is that your son? Cute kid. That's your son? Yeah, it was that one son. That's that one son? And now is the mother around or is she in this situation?
Starting point is 00:34:53 What's going on? No, she's upstairs, but she's kind of a situation. Now, does your nephew ever think that you're his dad because you guys are identical? I think, yeah, dad's like a title, I think. Right. You guys are identical? I think, yeah, that's like a title, I think. Right. You guys are identical. Your brother became the fireman, he's the real man, and you look like you're a flamingo dancer.
Starting point is 00:35:10 So what happened? I'm an IT engineer. Oh, you're the smart one. Yeah. Yeah, well, I mean, your audio is fucking frags and beans. Yeah, it is. All right, Bubba. Well, listen, we got to hate Bertrand,
Starting point is 00:35:24 but you got anything to ask us? Um, no You're the best We love you Thanks for your service, guy Thank you Yeah, I mean, wow Corey Bertram's Franks and Bates
Starting point is 00:35:38 Now we got Joe White coming in next Joe White could be a black kid Wow, he's a white kid He looks like he just wrote a poem in the 1700s can't hear you i mean you gotta put your mic on i mean there he is right now yeah are you mixing spirits in the basement you look like a mixologist uh i'm a bartender but i've been sober for seven years where are you from you, brother. You got it right with the accent. There it is, dude.
Starting point is 00:36:07 Another Philly guy, huh? Yeah. Now, how'd you hear about us? I think Nate Bargetzi posted Giannis' special when it came out. Like, maybe, like, no, before then. Oh, so you're a Nate Bargetzi fan? Then to Giannis, you're the enemy. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:36:24 No, me and Nate are old friends. He's's great he snoozed a little bit on the party but i enjoyed it yeah snoozes on most parties but what can you do yeah what are you gonna do you know he's a great stand-up but he's a snooze on podcasts kind of like bill burr yeah what um what what have you been moving your monkey to uh you know just uh strictly uh ladies ladies with dicks. That's it. Salute. Thank you for your service. Somebody's got to keep those ladies employed. Are you an essential worker?
Starting point is 00:36:52 No, I'm a bartender. Oh, that's right. So you've just been home doing nothing. Yeah. All right, Bubba. We can expect that we probably got a month left of your membership. Yeah. I'm good. I'm good. My grandma died.
Starting point is 00:37:06 I got inheritance. Oh, there you go. That's nice. You gave her the corona. Can we get – Lisa Johnson said you're cute. Can we get a live look at your feet? You want to take your socks off and show us your feet real quick? Yeah, I can show you my feet.
Starting point is 00:37:19 I mean, you don't really have to do it, guy. Just do it. Gross. I mean, Lisa Johnson. If Lisa Johnson – I mean, he's actually got cute feet. You got these feet. Okay, but, babe, we got to hate and hurt you. So just, you know, we thank you so much for your support. We love you, buddy. And, you know, Phil, don't worry.
Starting point is 00:37:38 The world's going to fucking open soon. All right. Love you guys. Love you, man. Take care. Thank God for his grandmother dying so he has enough money to keep paying us. Look at this kid. We got Alexander
Starting point is 00:37:49 Indolacado. I mean, you're a sauce monkey. Oh, yeah. Big time. Yeah, you look like Jared Freed. My wife loves him. Oh, really? Yeah. Where are you calling us from? Chicago suburbs. Nice, dude. My wife and I were supposed to see you in Indy this weekend, Chrissy. Where are you calling us from? Chicago suburbs Nice dude
Starting point is 00:38:05 My wife and I were supposed to see you in Indy this weekend Really? Damn it Fucking sweet I'll try to reschedule Indy sucks Indy's the scooser of the city I was trying to make some money But what can you do?
Starting point is 00:38:24 What's been your favorite moment of the podcast so far? Yeah, and how's your marriage? Your marriage good? Yeah, we actually just got married in July, so it's going real well. There you go, dude. So statistically, it won't work. Yeah. Yeah, you know.
Starting point is 00:38:36 Just kidding. Where is she? Is she around? Is she there? She's going to get mad at me. She's standing right here. Oh, yeah, I was just kidding. I'm Mr. Andalacato.
Starting point is 00:38:43 I was just kidding. I didn't see you there. Tell her to come in frame. Come in frame. No way she's going to do it. She doesn't have makeup on. She doesn't want to. Yeah, she's got makeup on. Hey!
Starting point is 00:38:56 Listen, make sure the fucking sauce has the garlic sliced in or else you're going to get disciplined. Yeah, your husband's not mentally ill, okay? He likes our podcast but I know a lot of spouses are like, dinner or else you're gonna get disciplined yeah your husband's not mentally ill okay he's just he likes our podcast but i know a lot of spouses are like is my husband mentally ill but the truth is is that i know i have two man bun ponytails right now but i'm not mentally ill she watches wafer with me every night before we go to bed wow wow they can watch way back night that's
Starting point is 00:39:19 interesting bedtime story yeah they're bad there you go are you saying because it's a snoozer no not at all not at all yeah you look like a guy that loves hockey actually no no i'm a i'm a football baseball and soccer guy there you go i'm just what do you do guy what do you do for a living i'm a uh i'm a recruiter for roofing company so keeping people dry nice well i mean a recru mean, a recruiter for a roofing company? Yeah, yeah. Don't you just get a bunch of Mexicans? I mean, what do you do? What do you recruit for that?
Starting point is 00:39:51 Yeah, what do you go to Home Depot and just say, get in? Yeah, why not just – Let's just have a whole lot of shirt string with Lopez and Diego in there. Guys, we'll just tell Mike Mush to give you his family's phone numbers. Yeah. If anyone shows up with the last name Suarez, don't hire him because the kid's going to fall off. Yeah. They last about three months.
Starting point is 00:40:11 There you go. All right, Bubba's we got to go. We got to hate Bert. You, but thank you so much for the support and thank you to the missus for watching us. I appreciate it.
Starting point is 00:40:17 Mikey, whatever you hear, somebody works in the roofing business. Do you get PTSD? Well, I'm not the one who fell, but I do. The tear goes on my my
Starting point is 00:40:25 cheek yeah i mean this kid jeff koza i mean this next up kid i mean his profile pic i mean his kids are fucking so smoking bad first question is when did he get out of jail i mean that's the first question so go ahead when did you get out of jail i actually expect him to be doing this from a prison cell yeah i mean this is uh my name is jeff i pound off with my left by the way oh this is a firefighter this kid's a firefighter in florida this kid's great name is are we bringing him in well i brought him in but he's not turning his mic on i mean he's not taking his sorry yeah there he is yeah how you doing bubs good just get out of work um i'm distracted though why that blowjob doorknob on your head is getting me kind of hard How you doing, bubs? Good. Just getting out of work. I'm distracted, though. Why?
Starting point is 00:41:07 That blowjob doorknob on your head is getting me kind of hard. Dude, there it is. Did you pound off with the left today? Both, actually. Wow. Yeah. What's it like to have one of the best Patreon names of all time? It's not bad.
Starting point is 00:41:22 I try to live by it every day. Yeah. At work and not at work. Now, Coach, you're a firefighter down in Florida, It's not bad. I try to live by it every day. Yeah. At work and not at work. You're a firefighter down in Florida, so if you get a call for a fire and you see a Hillary sticker, do you wait a little longer to pull the person out? Yeah, he's not going to say it. I'm not from Florida, though. I'm not from Florida.
Starting point is 00:41:42 I'm from Buffalo, actually. Oh. Yeah. Are you single? What's your deal? I'm a married Florida. I'm from Buffalo, actually. Oh. Yeah. Are you single? What's your deal? I'm a married man. My wife's teaching children in the room over. You got kids yourself or no?
Starting point is 00:41:51 No. She's an online teacher. Oh, there you go. There you go. Yeah. Yeah. It's funny. It's funny to, like, you know, upstanding citizens and firefighters that, you know, have names like I pound off with my left and, like, their wives have no idea. It's just hilarious to me.
Starting point is 00:42:06 Oh, yeah. She knows. She knows. She's with every day. She knows. Does she have the garlic sliced nice and thin for you every night? I do the fucking cooking. Wow. I like that. Work it, girl. Yeah, man. I'm a classy fella and a classy babe.
Starting point is 00:42:21 Do you have anything to ask us? Yeah. Yanni. Yeah. You need to ask us? Yeah. Yanni. Yeah. You need to take your shirt off again, please. You want me to take my shirt off? Yeah. See those nips. It's paying 25 bucks a month.
Starting point is 00:42:33 Oh, God, yeah. It deserves to see the nips. Yeah, just let it fly. Let them titties fly, guy. And I want to say congratulations to you for getting out of Buffalo. Thank you. It's cold up there, but now I'm dealing with special ed people from, I mean, Franks and Beans people from Florida.
Starting point is 00:42:49 So it is what it is. It is what it is. Yeah. When we come to Florida, we'll shout you out. Thanks, Mike Woods. Thank you. All right, Bubba. It's good to see you.
Starting point is 00:42:56 We appreciate it. All right. Later, baby cakes. All right, Bubba. Later, Honey Bubbles. Because, by the way, Honey Bubbles is an absolute 10. It's a 10, right? Yeah.
Starting point is 00:43:07 Good. Who is this? Jonathan Story? Correct. There he is. Yeah. This kid's coming. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:43:16 Jonathan Story. What's up, baby? What's going on? How you doing? I'm good. How are you? Where are you calling from? Annapolis, Maryland.
Starting point is 00:43:24 Wow. Nice. Annapolis, Maryland is fucking cute. Me and Yanni walked around at once. doing i'm good how are you where are you calling from annapolis maryland not wow nice annapolis maryland is fucking cute i want me and yanni walked around at once remember when we did that yanni i did yeah i mean so cuz what did you have a dreams about being a major league relief pitcher i mean what's the deal i did yeah i was a pitcher growing up you look really yeah now you look like a catcher both there you go you go. You're in Maryland? Where are you? Annapolis. Annapolis.
Starting point is 00:43:47 Do you dip? Do you chew? Nope, never chewed. Yeah? Do you jerk off? Have you been going out with your American flag wrapped around your piece and you to stay safe? A couple times a day. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:43:57 What's the eastern Hemme population where you live? About a half hour. Too many. I got it. About a half hour away. It's pretty half hour away it's pretty high do you want to do you want to ask us anything um no i'm good just supporting the channel love your content all right thanks we gotta go you're a snoozer we love you man thank you so much i mean i don't need to bring the next guy up oh pick up the pace i'm kidding john You're still on. No, John, you're the best, man.
Starting point is 00:44:26 Oh, Chris the teacher's coming in next. John, you might want to stay on for this. Yeah, look at this. It's Chris the teacher. There we go. Yeah. Because I would say famous, but it's more infamous. More infamous.
Starting point is 00:44:38 Yeah. We just want to let you know, anything you say, Will and Ken and Will will be used against you in the court of law. Well, I did drive by Giannis' you in the court of law. I did drive by Giannis' new house the other day. It's a nice place you got there. You probably did. How many times have you left Long Island?
Starting point is 00:44:54 Your accent is strong. You got to keep it going when you're living on the island. Your wife knows. Come on. My wife is from out on the island as well. By the way, congratulations Gianni Vasdefrans. Working good. I appreciate it. come on my wife is from out on the island as well yeah by the way congratulations yanni vas defrons all right working good all right thank you i appreciate god bless i had to drive by just to so i know where to send the baby gifts i appreciate it yeah if i see you out there i'm
Starting point is 00:45:15 gonna shoot you right in the head i got it yeah your nest cam's working really good it went off as soon as i got in the neighborhood but now we were up there hiking so i said i gotta drive by nice yeah would you did you um now do – you got so many baseball bats behind you. Are you a baseball coach? What's going on? No, you know, I saw you. You know I like the Mets. It's my thing.
Starting point is 00:45:34 You like the Mets. Yeah, no, most people – all my friends are Franks and Beans, and they love the Mets. I mean – Yeah, yeah. I mean – How wild was that when you went to the game, and then you saw Chris the teacher sitting right next to you?
Starting point is 00:45:44 Yeah, and then he said hello to Pat. He fly balls, and Pat was like, well, who the fuck is this guy? I'm like, it's Chris the teacher. Now Patty's my boy. We DM on Instagram more than I DM you now. I bet. Well, that's because I have you blocked by the FBI. Bubbas, so what's been going on? Chrissy, what's new in quarantine?
Starting point is 00:46:02 How's the wife? How's the kids? Wife left on Easter. Oh, good. So that's why you on, Chrissy? What's new in quarantine? How's the wife? How's the kids? Wife left on Easter. Oh, good. So that's why you're sitting in the basement? So whose basement are you in? No, I'm in my house, in my basement. I'm in my basement.
Starting point is 00:46:14 But I just figured that would be a good backdrop for you. Very nice. But she left on Easter. Did she take the kids? We're splitting them. We're splitting them back and forth a little bit. I'm getting them this weekend. It's supposed to be a nice day.
Starting point is 00:46:27 We're going to go up to Eaton's Neck for a little hike. Hike's good. Hike's good. Where's Eaton's Neck? North. Way north. Way north. North.
Starting point is 00:46:37 Okay, good, good, good, good, good. All right. All right, Bubba. Well, listen, don't, you know. For every door that closes, a new one opens. So, you know, it's like you you're gonna have a good time later, yeah She'll be back, I mean, how could you run away from this? I mean, come on
Starting point is 00:46:51 Exactly Yeah, you look like a testicle I really hope that you guys reschedule those fucking live dates for the city, yo We will Yes We will And look, we appreciate your support, Chrissy, as always, man.
Starting point is 00:47:09 Thank you, Chris. Appreciate it. All right. Thank you. All right. Now we get some females. Yeah, I'm happy that's over. Who do we got now? No Fumes Nicole takes up the Dutch apple pie. Hey, guys. Wow, there you go. Hello, No Fumes Nicole. How you doing? Good. How are you, Nicole? Look at that apple pie. Hey, guys. Oh, there you go. Hello, NoFusionCole. How you doing?
Starting point is 00:47:26 Good. How are you, Nicole? Look at that shirt. I mean, I'm really sad. I was supposed to be in New York City this weekend with Lisa Johnson and all the cuzzies and partying, and we're not there. So I'm very sad. But, you know, it is what it is.
Starting point is 00:47:39 It is what it is. Yeah, I mean, you know, we got no control over this little squeak virus. But make no mistake, we will be back, and we can't wait to see whatever crew Lisa Johnson brings. She always flies up a real crazy crew. Or a ragtag bunch. Where are you from? You're from the South, but what state?
Starting point is 00:47:58 I live in Atlanta. Oh, you live by Lisa then. You and Lisa are friends. Yeah, we met at your show, Chris, back in September. Wow. That's amazing. You know, I love that fans are starting to get to know each other just from listening to the podcast.
Starting point is 00:48:11 That's nice. We should do – we are going to do like a fans-only kind of picnic thing. Do you want to do a picnic, Yanni, or no? I mean, Chrissy, you've got to run your ideas by me before you just throw them into the public. Benatia, clip it. We're doing a picnic for the fans. How about a pool party?
Starting point is 00:48:29 We will do a small – Lisa Johnson is like a well-adjusted, normal person, so I would do it with Lisa Johnson and whoever she picks, but we got to limit it to about six. Yeah, can't do it. No fumes and coal. Do you have any questions for us? I mean, are those FFs at Norwalk going to give us our money back for our tickets? It's a good question.
Starting point is 00:48:55 We're working on that now. We're talking about today. Yeah. We're talking about that now as opposed to rescheduling the date. Let's just give refunds, and then when the world opens back up, then we'll, then we'll rebook it. But right now they're saying that the venues are in control of the money and all that. So we're fighting to get the refunds so everyone can get their money back. Yeah. I mean, we had, we had taken over the front row, so that would be awesome to keep them. But on the other hand, you know, it's nice to get that money back. So yeah, yeah, yeah, right. Well, we'll make sure
Starting point is 00:49:23 you guys get front row. Yeah. We're going to make sure you get that money back. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Right, right. We'll make sure you guys get front row. Yeah, we're going to make sure you get that money back one way or the other. We're going to make sure it's good. We were actually speaking about that today. Thank you for your service. What do you do down there in Atlanta? I'm a scientist at the CDC. Oh, my God.
Starting point is 00:49:39 Our fans are fucking 10 out of 10. Wait a second. She's a scientist at the CDC? What's going on with this fucking squeak virus? I mean, I can't tell you. Then I'd have to kill you. Oh, okay. I really don't know.
Starting point is 00:49:50 I don't work in that area. But, you know, we're all working overtime to make up to the people that are working in that area. Yeah. All right. All right. Well, thank you so much for your service. We really appreciate it. We love you guys down here.
Starting point is 00:50:02 All right. Love you, baby. Love you, Dr. Apple. Bye. All right. Bye, babe baby This next guy Zoom wouldn't let him change his name to his Patreon name
Starting point is 00:50:10 It's AntiFarbox999 Wow Yeah, man, that's me Wow I just downloaded Zoom for this I don't know what's going on Yeah, because You're a wild kid
Starting point is 00:50:26 and we love you oh yeah yeah yeah i mean what are you on what are you doing right now you're crystal meth yeah i mean how many ad rolls have you had now what i'm at work right now what do you do for work i work at a mechanic shop yeah cuz i because, I mean, make no mistake, you look like Joe Exotic's fourth husband. I haven't seen him. He looks like a homeowner. Because you're a gay guy on the inside. Without a doubt, no. I mean, every once in a while, you've got to pull out the Johnny Sins every once in a while.
Starting point is 00:50:57 Bubba, where are you calling from? What state? Franklin, Tennessee. Wow. Franklin, Tennessee is beautiful. A lot of history there. Dude, let me tell you, man. I used to work at the Visitor Center for three and a half years.
Starting point is 00:51:08 I can tell you anything about this shit. So if we come down there, can you show us some of the history sites? I'll show you the three home tours they have, the Carter Home, Carton Plantation, and the Lotz Home. Each gives you a little bit different view of the Battle of Franklin, which happened November 30, 1864. Are you a history buff? Yeah, that's why I listen to fucking podcasts. Oh, you're the best.
Starting point is 00:51:30 I like this kid. I like this fucking kid. I'll let you in my car anytime. We're going to do a Civil War episode. I don't know nothing. We're going to do a Civil War episode coming up soon. One of the next two or three we're going to do is about Civil War, so maybe we'll fucking do something about Franklin, Tennessee for you. Maybe we'll do it.
Starting point is 00:51:45 I'm three quarters hard right now. Show it! No, I can't. You'll get fired from your mechanic shop, guy. Alright, Bubba's, listen, we gotta go, we gotta go, but we really appreciate the support, you fucking grease monkey. I appreciate it.
Starting point is 00:52:02 Thanks, Jake. Alright, see you later. Oh, John Stamm! Is this the kid that does the I appreciate it. Thanks, Jake. All right, see you later. All right, we got... Oh, John Stamm. Is this the kid that does the... The clips? Yeah. Is he a member?
Starting point is 00:52:13 Wow, look at this kid, John. There he is. John Stamm, are you the kid who does the clips? Yeah. Oh, you're the man, cuz. We got to talk to you again. How you doing, man? Not bad.
Starting point is 00:52:23 It's crazy here, you know. Everything's closed. Yeah. I'm a Westchester. Yeah, man. I mean How you doing, man? Not bad. It's crazy here. You know, everything's closed. Yeah. I'm a Westchester. Yeah, man. Yeah, man. I mean, you're a fucking snoozer. What the hell?
Starting point is 00:52:32 Like, 15, 10 seconds, guy. Yeah. Pick it up. Yeah, I mean, you're coming down hard on the guy. He's done some free work for us. Oh, yeah. Thanks, John. We really appreciate your support.
Starting point is 00:52:41 Keep it going. Has anyone ever told you that you look like the guy from Game of Thrones, the fat kid? No. That's who you look like. What's his name, Stanley? Sam. You look like Samuel. No. I never watched Game of Thrones. Yeah, what else do you look like? You look like Samuel. But, cuz, what do you do for work? What's going on?
Starting point is 00:53:00 I do video work, but all the venues in the city are closed, so I can't really do anything. Cuz, I want to do a drinking game where every time you adjust your hair, we do a shot. I'll be fucking hammered by the end of this call. Because you got beautiful hair. Thank you. So do you. You have fumes right now or no fumes?
Starting point is 00:53:20 No, no fumes. No fumade. A lot of people watching this know that this kid, John, has done a few of the videos you've watched for us. He's actually made them for us. Thank you, John. No problem. I've been meaning to do more of them, but I've been helping my dad with some work.
Starting point is 00:53:34 It's just been crazy the past month. Are you a sauce monkey? What kind of monkey are you? I'm like seven different things. My mom's from Nicaragua. My dad's from the Bronx. So I'm all over the place. There you go. Good kid. You're a nice you go good kid you're a nice good kid you're a nice good kid yeah I'll get more videos going and you
Starting point is 00:53:50 know what have um what have you been moving your monkey to oh well you know whatever pops up on the yeah because because I'm pretty sure I'm pretty sure in the back because I see in the background I see you got some Red Bulls and then I see your Apple TV remote is stuck to the side of that refrigerator and I'm pretty sure that you stuck it there with your own glue that's a dresser my room's a disaster oh wow look at that I mean yeah there's dead cats under there
Starting point is 00:54:16 it's a horror show here John you're a fucking beautiful kid yeah John I'll DM you later man we'll figure this out alright awesome good to talk to you alright John thank you so much for being a fan we really You're a fucking beautiful kid. Yeah, John. I'll DM you later, man. We'll figure this out. All right, awesome. Good to talk to you guys. All right, John. Thank you so much for being a fan.
Starting point is 00:54:27 We really appreciate it. And seriously, appreciate all the clips you make. No problem, man. Take it easy, guys. Love you, John. Yeah. Oh, wow. We're ending with Jesse the truffle pig.
Starting point is 00:54:35 Oh, Jesse the truffle pig. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. What's up, guy? What's up, baby? There he is. Wow. He's got a... Yeah. No, he's up, guy? What's up, babies? There he is.
Starting point is 00:54:50 Wow, he's got a full ponytail, cuz. You'll get cracked open with that. Yo, if Jeff cut off with the left like your hair, he's going to love this. He's going to need both hands for his hose. Holy shit. Yeah, cuz. I mean, cuz, quarantine has made you into a full woman. I'm tucked back big time.
Starting point is 00:55:07 Are you making any brews in the sink? What's going on? Yeah, I just made one last week. It should be ready in a couple weeks. There you go. I picked up some kegging equipment today. Nice. I've been furloughed from the brewery.
Starting point is 00:55:18 It is what it is. Okay. So, thanks for bringing it home, yeah. Until we can take care of this squeak virus. Now, do you keep in contact with Lisa Johnson and the whole crew? No, every once in a while I see Krista takes it, Legal 2 takes it past the Uvula online. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:55:37 That's kind of it, though. Because you guys were, like, hanging out at the first show we ever did, right, at the stand? Yeah. Yeah, yeah. That's great. You're a good kid, Jesse. I'd include Jesse with Lisason with people i trust with people i trust for the picnic yeah you know what i'm looking in his eyes and i can tell he's a normal kid the next time he makes a brew i'm gonna drink
Starting point is 00:55:54 it we're not gonna throw him down the sink and waste all that hard work because vanity has said you can't drink it because he's crazy because vanity is a franks and beads paranoid greek yeah buzzies would you rather do the picnic at Rowan Roasters on Emmons or Spumoni Gardens? Wow. Yeah, let's do it at Spumoni. Let's do it at Spumoni, yeah, because I don't eat meat. I'm plant-based. Cuzzies, you were talking about pizza the other day, and you didn't mention DeFarra's.
Starting point is 00:56:18 You guys like DeFarra's? DeFarra's is number one. You know what? DeFarra's used to be number one. I've never eaten DeFarra's pizza in my life. Is that wild? That's wild, Cuz. We to be number one i've never eaten defar's pizza in my life is that wild that's wild cuz we gotta go never been that's the spot never been once you can pick up pizza from there now with the quarantine you can actually just place the order and then just go pick it up why don't you go why don't you order uh before the guy dies chris you gotta eat you
Starting point is 00:56:40 got before uh i mean the kid's like 80-something. You got to go eat before he goes. How many times have you eaten DeFara? Many, many times. Many. Yeah, many times. I mean, it's the best pizza I've ever had in my life. Yeah, I've never been. Yeah, you got to go. You got to do it, babe. Jesse, what's going on? Are you single or what's your deal? I'm single,
Starting point is 00:57:00 babe. You want to hook me up with someone? What do you want? I can be a gay kid real easy. Look at the hair. Yeah, I mean, because I've cracked open a lot of girls that look just like you. What do you move your monkey to? It's called Wape on the Morning. It's on around 9. Wow, yeah.
Starting point is 00:57:16 Yeah, yeah. Yeah, I mean, Jesse the Truffle Pig, he's a top-tier non-tube with Lisa Johnson. He's in the crew. There's a bunch of them. There's a few of them. I think Jeff Poundoff with the left is getting in there.
Starting point is 00:57:32 Everyone in the $25 level is kind of like a top level non-two. Yeah. Thanks guys. You know, I've been like a fan of yours since YKWD way back in the day. Right. It's just great to like see you guys taking off and kind of be a little part of it. That's awesome.
Starting point is 00:57:44 Yeah. Thanks. It's been great to watch us leave them in the dust. I left them too. I'm kidding. If he's still talking to Mikey, Mikey should tell him to change it to Body Kelly's Pity Party.
Starting point is 00:57:56 There you go. Did you hear that, Mikey? They had a falling out. I saw it the other day. It was wild. Wait, what happened? Oh, really? Oh, they're falling out. Yeah, it happened on air. Most of it's a place off the air.
Starting point is 00:58:10 Alright, right, right, right. Mikey, how you doing? I'm doing great. Okay, good. Jess, you want to show us your feet real quick or no? We don't got to see his feet, guy. Yeah, we do. Jesus Christ, Chris. Okay, yeah.
Starting point is 00:58:30 Come on, eh? Yo, Chris. All right, Bubba. Chris, when you put the fucking bun up, you take it to another level of wild. I'm wild, guys. Chrissy Samurais. All right, Bubba.
Starting point is 00:58:42 All right, Bubba, Jesse. We love you, man. Hey, Bert, thank you so much. We appreciate it. Yeah, take care. All right, Bubba. All right, Bubba, Jesse. We love you, man. Hey, Bert, thank you so much. We appreciate it. Yeah, take care. All right. Is that it? How have the comments been?
Starting point is 00:58:50 The chat's been awesome. Did we get through everybody? Well, there's two people who, guys, I'm sorry. Your names aren't matching what you have when you emailed me. But I'll talk to you guys after this. We'll get you next time. when you emailed me. I'll talk to you guys after this. We'll get you next time.
Starting point is 00:59:10 So we'll plan one another time. This week. This was great. This was fun. Everyone in the chat, can you let us know if you liked this or didn't like this? Yes, let us know. We enjoyed getting to put some faces to the names. Awesome. Cool. We may be able to put some faces to the names. Awesome. Cool.
Starting point is 00:59:25 And we may be able to do other fun stuff with it. And the community board, let's let us know what you liked. Guys, you want to take us out? Yeah. Yeah. Thank you guys so much for all the support. We really appreciate it. And I want to do this in the future.
Starting point is 00:59:38 Like, this is the new way I want to do it. This is better than the phone calls. Way better. Totally. Totally. So how does it work now? They get this, and then we don't talk business than the phone calls. Way better. Totally. Totally. So how does it work now? They get this and then we don't talk business
Starting point is 00:59:48 on the podcast, right? Yeah, Venetian's listening. We can't talk business. We gotta go. Thank you guys. Have a good time. Alright. ប្រូវាប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់

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