History Hyenas with Chris Distefano and Yannis Pappas - WEPA in the Morning 5/29!
Episode Date: May 29, 2020The History Hyenas Patreon morning news show Wepa in the Morning gives you your daily dose of whats going on in the world in the style only Yannis Pappas and Chris Distefano can bring you! These are ...the headlines from May 29th, 2020!!Want more Hyena content? Check out www.patreon.com/bayridgeboys where things get really WILD!Follow us!: 🙆🏼♂️🐕🙆🏻♂️🙆🏼♂️Chris Distefano on Instagram, Twitter, website🙆🏻♂️Yannis Pappas on Instagram, Twitter, website🐕History Hyenas on Instagram, Twitter, website Subscribe to the poddy woddy on YouTube, iTunes, Spotify, and HH Clips
Transcript
Discussion (0)
What's up, everybody?
Buenos noches!
Good morning, buenos tardes!
I would say happy friday, cuz, but you know what?
I'm not sure if this is a happy Fri-yay today.
Yeah, cuz, you've been, we
had the pre-production meeting, and make
no mistake, Yanni's upset
about the status of the country.
He's upset. He's a cranky
Yankee today, but it's okay
because, baby, it is Friday.
It's WEPA in the mornings, and
don't forget, it's not only is it a wild
episode, there's a lot of serious things to talk about,
but we end it all this week, as we always do,
with the squeak of the week.
And if a guy named James Debo, Longfell Deeps 31,
can't put a smile on your face,
if that little squeak with his little sippy cup
can't put a smile on your face,
then I think you got more problems.
No matter what happens in this country, in this world,
you can count on one thing and that is weapon.
The morning will be around. We're here. We've heard your cries.
We are back. And no matter how many buildings are burning,
we are still going to work it.
We're here and I have a Logitech camera and a fucking ring light.
So try to stop me now. You pieces of shit.
You that the new lighting and
the new camera i gotta say it's bringing out the baby blues and your teeth are just white as white
can be and cuz yeah and i'm gonna i'm gonna show you the setup i'm gonna take a picture of it right
now and i'll send it to the group chat and we'll put it on just at the puerto rican setup i have
because cuz make no mistake when it's wet in the morning things are going to be done like we're in San Juan and I have a
San Juan setup right now so hold on I'm going to show you exactly how I even got everything set up
I mean it's just what it is it's weapon in the morning send it to the group chat maybe Mikey
will get it ready I woke up thinking thinking, you know what? Country's burning.
Protesters in Taiwan could be a trade war with China.
You know, Pompei has declared Taiwan isn't autonomous from China anymore.
And doesn't pay.
You mean Pompei from Italy escaped from Pompei?
Yeah.
Michael Pompey, the second.
Oh, OK.
That fucking fat guy.
I thought you meant escape from Pompeii, which is a
wild ride in Hershey Park. Shout out Hershey Park.
Same shit. You know,
he's announcing that
Wait, no, it's not.
Who the fuck is calling me at this
time in the morning at 9 a.m.?
By the way, I don't think it's Hershey Park. I think it's
Tampa Bay. It's Busch Gardens. It's one of them.
Who the fuck is, who's calling you?
I don't know who's calling me, but what I was saying is I
wake up to all this bad stuff going on.
I figure, you know what? At least I can count on
my wife to be dreaming about me. Guess what?
Cause she's dreaming about one of the
outliners again. Yeah. Well,
unfortunately, I mean, they're cute. Now, wait,
who is the out? Who are the, is this the one that
they go back in time? Is that a history show?
I mean, outlanders
Venetia probably knows.
Do you know these guys?
I don't.
I'm sorry.
No.
Okay.
It's some show where there's guys that travel back in time.
They got beards.
Because you know, girls, they love guys with dirty hair and beards.
And those are the ones that they dream about.
But then in real life, they're looking for accountants with jobs who can get them houses.
They watch out.
It's what it is. Yeah. And that's and you know what? You did one better.
You got a house in New Hampshire. So I don't know what she's complaining about.
But make no mistake. I wish I was that woman leaning against that tree.
That guy's fucking cute. Yeah. I mean, girls love these guys with the fucking long hair and facial hair.
It's it's just what they do. You know, you love a guy in a tool belt and jeans with a six pack.
You just don't like reality, ladies.
Yeah, you don't like reality.
Guess what?
Nobody's going to come fix your sink with a six pack and a fucking and jeans and no shirt on.
The guy who's going to come fix your sink is going to be 400 pounds.
He's going to have fumes.
And you're going to have to listen to seven minutes about why Hillary's the devil.
Yeah, it's just what it is.
The guy who's going to come fix your sink is on a ventilator right now dying's the devil yeah it's just what it is the guy who's gonna come fix your sink is on a ventilator right now dying from covid so it's
just what it is the guy's gonna come fix your sink's last name is spatter ducci and he's got
a van and you know what's on the side of that man it's a phone number with his family name
yeah it's what it's what it is you know so that yeah these fantasies but this is what we was
talking about before is america's problem it's always been the media this kind of this kind of fake fake fake
expectations that we put on ourselves as a country you know you can't say you can't curse on tv but
they'll show ak-47s and they'll do shows about horrible things and police brutality but god
forbid you say shit or God forbid you do some,
you know, you say a word you're not supposed to. Our morals and our values are wrong here.
And that's why now the country is on fire. It's exploded. Horrible, horrible things are going on.
There's police protests. You know, Trump is being wild. But, you know, there was a mass shooting.
But America's back open for business. So I guess that's kind of a good thing.
Yeah, that there's mass shootings and protests and cops are doing wild shit, you know, we're back open for business. Now, yeah, this press thing is a big issue. But now we got this issue with Twitter here.
Trump, again, has tweeted something and then Twitter flagged it and put up a disclaimer saying it violated its rules about glorifying violence.
Twitter, here's the deal. I don't know. It's your fucking real estate. Do what you want.
But I'll be honest with you. If we need that disclaimer to know that it's a wild tweet,
then our country has bigger problems than fucking who the president is because we're
Franks and Beans. I mean, the president of the United States, I don't care whether you're
Republican or Democrat, should not be tweeting what he tweeted. Yeah, we know. And it's also
like I'm starting to think I understand what Twitter's point of view is here, but I'm starting
to think Jack Dorsey might be a Russian bot. I mean, what are you doing here? Like you're trying
now you're flagging everything you're getting involved. You kind of are meddling in an election
in a way. So it's like at what point do we have to tell jack dorsey even though i know he's trying to do a good thing to shut up and take
your shirt off at what point do we have to tell jack that yeah i mean if we could pull up the
tweet mikey would be really great because um oh here we go do we have this mike the tweet up
mikey if if you just keep playing it maybe it'll come up not this one specifically yeah
if you just keep playing it, maybe they'll go to
it. Well, while we're waiting, okay,
but just while we're waiting, I just want to
pause it there. I just want to remind everyone
Floyd Mayweather did kill his baby mama. Go ahead.
I think there's a good chance that Floyd Mayweather
killed his baby mama at the beginning
of quarantine. It's what it is.
So Donald Trump tweeted this.
These thugs are dishonoring the memory
of George Floyd, and I won't let that happen.
Just spoke to Governor Tim Walz, who's a cute,
no, that's the mayor who was a cute kid,
and told him that the military is with him all the way.
Any difficulty and we will assume control.
But when the looting starts,
this is the part you don't want to tweet.
The shooting starts.
You can't do that.
You're the president of the United united states you cannot say you're
gonna start shooting people i feel like he sends out tweets and then his cabinet they're all like
this i feel like everybody in the white house is just like this kind of all the time they just got
their hands permanently stuck to their head i just because what do you do what do you do when
your president united states tweets that what the fuck if'm an advisor, if I'm anybody that works for this country,
what am I supposed to do now?
I mean, you just can't tweet that.
You can't tweet you're going to start murdering people if they loot.
Even if they're looting, you're not supposed to murder them.
You're not supposed to start shooting them.
Because I got to be honest with you, at least at the end of the tweet,
he did say thank you.
He did say thank you. So he's professional. He's courteous.
So he said thank you. And my mother said, you always need to say please and thank you.
So I think my mom would have proved his tweet for more than a couple of reasons.
Listen, he tweeted this like minutes before 1 a.m.
The kid is 73 years old or four. Yeah.
I mean, I know old people get a little bit of insomnia or whatever,
but guy, you're the president of the United States.
Didn't you get tired during the day where you want to go to sleep at a
reasonable fucking hour?
I mean, what are you doing on Twitter?
Yeah.
Fucking 1am cuz.
I mean, babos, he's fucking wild, wild kids.
I just want to say this.
My only responsibility is to wake up to do WEPA.
And because of that, I make sure
I'm in bed by 11. The president's
got to wake up and be president during a pandemic
and riots. You think the guy would
be fucking getting some shut-eye before 1030?
And you would think
that
a tweet
like this, there's no chance this guy will
get elected again. But then you have
liberals on the other side just being like, everything's okay as this guy will get elected again. But then you have liberals on the other side just
being like, everything's okay as this reporter.
Do we have the tweet from
the reporter, Mike, when he's saying everything's
okay, but the fucking building's on fire
behind him? It's like,
so you start to say,
people start to say, you know what, I'd rather have a
guy who's telling the truth, even though it's a horrible,
disgusting, stupid truth. They
perceive Donald Trump as telling the truth, which is it's a horrible, disgusting, stupid truth. They perceive Donald Trump as telling the truth,
which is fucking nuts.
This actually made me laugh endlessly.
It's self-explanatory.
We don't even have to comment on it.
You'll see
for yourself. It's MSNBC.
I think he's typically like a
financial guy, and he might even be a Canadian.
Well, yeah.
I'm just explaining it because this episode we're out on iTunes.
Now we're out on YouTube, go to patreon.com slash Bay Ridge boys.
If you're not getting the visual on this, you're missing out.
So go ahead to patreon.com slash Bay Ridge boys, get the visual,
but we'll describe it. It's just, it's, it's a, it's a, it's a liberal reporter.
I guess. I mean, they're saying it's a liberal. Here we go. Here we go.
And he's saying things are fine, but there's fucking,
there's chaos in the background. This isn't it though. I mean, they're saying it's a liberal reporter. Here we go. Here we go. And he's saying things are fine, but there's fucking, there's chaos in the background.
This isn't it, though. This is, oh, it could be.
No.
God damn it.
It's the tweet. I sent it in the group chat.
It's the tweet,
you know, it was the tweet above that says, why you shouldn't let liberals,
it's Wilt Chamberlain.
All right, hold on, hold on. If you scroll back up, Mikey,
Wilt Chamberlain. Wait, let me see if I can get it on the Logitech. Oh, no, I can't. It's Wilt Chamberlain. All right, hold on, hold on. If you scroll back up, Mikey, Wilt Chamberlain. Wait, let me see if I can get
it on the Logitech. Oh, no.
Goddamn background.
Yeah, there you go.
It is not
generally speaking.
Wilt Chamberlain tweet.
Wilt Chamberlain.
Well, while we're waiting, I just want to remind everyone that Floyd Mayweather
did kill his baby mama, and we're all
but certain of that. I mean, what happened
is she just mysteriously
died while she was sitting in a car.
I don't even remember. I don't think anyone's
done an autopsy or found out why, but the girl
was 40 years old. She was about to write a
book and she was suing him for millions
and millions of dollars. And he also used to hit her
and he was she was getting all types of money.
And then all of a sudden she passed
away during Corona. I think
Floyd Mayweather killed his baby mama.
Yeah. I'm just sending. Yeah.
We'll just move on to the next. And look, we're an F and B operation.
You know, it's like, it's what he does. Here's the news story.
While we find it, Mikey will get it.
All you got to do is scroll back a little Mikey and there's a tweet and the
video's in there. So, I mean, it's.
It's fine in the tweet and it's Twitter. because I can't just pull it up on my phone.
Guys, when I hear your voice, I go, you better stop talking like that.
I'm horned up.
Yeah, you better stop talking about that.
And Venetia, figure it out.
Yeah, Venetia, listen, Venetia wanted us to talk about transgender athletes.
So here we go.
The Department of Education ruled that Connecticut's policy allowing transgender athletes to compete in girls athletics is a violation of Title nine.
And is that what do we think about that?
I don't think you should talk. I don't think I should.
Yeah, I don't think we have the right to comment on this.
We're going to go right now, as we said, her name is Venetia, because right now it's not a great time for straight white women so she is venetia so venetia you're a woman you're a strong black woman what
is your opinion on this cuz wait hold on real quick venetia let's just start calling her sean
king because that's who she is i mean this was definitely interesting to come across, especially as a big topic on the podcast lately.
It is. It's a little bit sad that they're it's it's interesting.
I think it's fair and it's empowering people to be their true self.
You should run. You should run for office, babe.
I mean, you know how to dodge. You know how to dodge a bullet like Keanu Reeves in The Matrix.
I mean, you know how to not have an opinion.
You're Chrissy flip-flops.
You're Chrissy pancakes.
Yeah, Chrissy pancakes.
Yeah, because I agree with you, Venetia.
I think that it's just like, it's kind of like not welcome, though.
But I mean, what can you do?
There's, you know, it's just, God, the transgender transgender one is just so hard because homosexuality it's all fine.
Everything's fine with that and everything should be fine with transgender,
but it's just clear that it's not yet.
I love how you guys both didn't give an opinion on those and you just played
both sides. I'm just going to say, hooray, hooray, hooray. It was wrong.
Nothing's wrong with being trans.
Trans women aren't women. Trans
women are trans women.
That's why you have to call them trans.
Vanitya is not trans.
She's a woman. There's a difference.
Okay? The only negative to this
story is now
more people have lost their jobs because now
more mediocre male athletes
can't start fucking taking hormones and become champions that's the only downside to this story
is we've lost some fucking middle of the road guys who want to throw on a rig and run a race
for ex-girls let's go to our working girl oh here it is here's this guy. I characterize this. This is mostly a protest.
It is not it is not, generally speaking, unruly.
But fires have been started and there's a crowd that it's generally not unruly, but fires have been started.
The whole building is on firing the back on you.
Fucking cock. I'm fucking tired of these fucking cocks.
This is where we are. People are so committed to towing their party line now. It's gotten so
ridiculous that there could have been a black guy stabbing a white woman in the face with a knife
right behind him. And he would have still went, you know what? Pretty peaceful out here. You know,
protesters, you know, holding signs. I don't see any signs of unruliness.
Yeah, it's just when do the lies.
There's a building on fire behind your head.
Jesus Christ, I've had enough.
I fucking really had enough of it.
I can't wait to get to Depot Squeak of the Week
because at least we'll just get some normalcy in here.
Let's go to Work It Girl.
Grimes.
Now, who is Grimes again?
It's Elon Musk's baby mama, right? Is's elon musk baby mama right is it just
elon musk baby mama is it his wife no let's just say grimes worker girl turn to the left worker
girl turn to the right do your thing on the runway just be a housewife grimes nobody wants to see
your fucking art nobody cares nobody knew who you were before you started dating one of the most
famous people on the planet one of the most brilliant people in 21st century nobody wants to go to your fucking art exhibit
and i mean don't you think it's a little gross that she's she one of the paintings she wanted
to put on for 10 million dollars during this time i mean just shut the fuck up and take your shirt
off yeah yeah i agree just it's it's getting to the point now where it's like,
just,
yeah,
you,
you,
you have the second or third richest man in the world's baby.
Just shut up.
Just shut up.
Okay.
And I'm sure Elon Musk is saying that too.
I'm sure he's just saying,
just shut up lady.
Like what?
Let me get these fucking,
let me get these squeaks into the atmosphere on this rock and shut up.
He's going to send her up on a rock and it's going to be an accident.
Watch.
He's going to put her up in his space.
I just don't understand, man. Like celebrity,
like somebody's got to just warn the celebrity. Like, Hey man, you just had a baby.
Your husband is launching people into space in new cute suits. Right?
Like I know you want the spotlight. I know you feel unheard.
I know you feel like you get all the business travel and all the business travel and I need to do something too.
What about me? What about my career?
And he goes, here's $10,000.
Pay a fucking publicist
to do your dumb art show
so you will shut the fuck up because
I got people to send in space crimes.
I know you like to make music
on your little fucking keyboard, but I gotta put
people in space. I got a meeting with the
president tomorrow. Yeah,
exactly. Exactly. Shut up.
And by the way, here's a picture of
from the Weather Girl's point of view of
my Puerto Rican WEPA set up.
Mike, did you get that picture?
No, I never got it. Oh, you never got
it? I sent it to you. I sent it into the group chat.
Oh, did I not? Did anybody
get in the group chat? Vanity, did you get it?
I got it, yeah.
Jess got it right this second.
It's not that bad because, I mean, that setup is pretty cute.
No, but I got a ring light on a pack of Poland spring bottles.
I think it's pretty inventive.
I mean, you're a German kid.
You guys are pretty efficient.
You figured it out.
Yeah, but that's the baby's water supply.
I mean, still a pretty good sign i mean
what can you what can you do all right well what can you what can you freaking do yeah what can
you do i mean look babes i mean if he can get the picture up we'll show it but i'll tell you what
cuz it's time to go to a cute little thirst trap for the oh there we go there you can see there
yes i mean it's actually a pretty cute little arrangement you got there.
I mean, because even though I'm in Brooklyn, it says Long Island.
It says fucking Long Island, Brooklyn, United States.
Yeah. I mean, that household definitely is moving on up like the Jeffersons.
That's kind of cute. That's cute because it's cute.
I mean, you're out there in that mansion in Bay Ridge right there.
I mean, yeah, it's a mansion. Yeah.
And, you know, that's that's the background of the house.
And yeah, it smells it smells like huevos y adobo.
Because that's a cute blue wall.
Did you paint that?
I did.
The squeak did.
Sometimes.
I know you've been kind of holed up there, you know.
Yeah. You know, you kind of you you know your comedy's a little imprisoned but once in a while
you just gotta sacrifice
for the fans you have to sacrifice
your personal safety or
the calmness of your day for just
a good one
and thank you I just on behalf of
the matriarch I just want to say thank you
no problem thank you and by just, on behalf of the matriarch, I just want to say thank you. No problem. Thank you. And by the way,
I want to tell everyone for being a good painter. Thank you.
And by the way,
I want to say the quality of everything will be improving starting Monday.
I'm going to, we don't know if Yanni's going to come yet,
but I will be broadcasting from another space.
I'll be at our new studio,
our new studio located somewhere in the great confines of Bay Ridge.
I'll be at our new studio doing the first episode,
which hopefully the first of many episodes from our new place.
So I'll be free as a fucking bird.
I'll be free as a $3 bill.
And cuzzy,
you're going to want those episodes will come out Monday.
And then of course we'll have WEPA Wednesdays and it'll just be,
it'll be a fucking still big,
huge, happy family family patreon.com
slash very rich boys all the fun's
happening there and we're coming out on iTunes
and YouTube for freebies and because
make no mistake it's gonna feel good
to finally get fucking free
my comedy I've had a couple of things
where I've started because people like you've been stuttering a lot
I'm like yeah because I have a joke lined up and then the weather
girl walks in and you can't say what
I wanted to say.
Here she is.
Yeah. It's like you're doing it's like you're doing it's like you're doing comedy from behind jail. And there's a prison guard just over your shoulder at all times, at all times.
But I think that it's made me a better comedian, I'm hoping, because I've had to learn how to adapt in a high pressure situation.
But now I'm going to be free again and just going to rip it open.
It's like it's like it's like I'm righty. It's like I'm righty, you know, basketball, but I've been playing only with my left hand. That's how I've been feeling.
Yeah. That's what it is. Yeah. But so you've been playing with the left hand because the right hand
is a, is a handcuff. It's handcuffed. Yeah. Here we go. Here's why men are pointing loading,
got loaded guns at their dicks. And here's why the weather girls point a loaded gun at my dick yeah i mean oh who's this thirst
trap yeah this is our thirst trap of the day this guy's name is brook brook leich um can you tell me
who this is vanity who the fuck is this guy um he's a cutie with a and and and he got caught on
the brook like called out um brooks like who's Brooks like
it was no Julian Ho
Julian Ho
Julian Huff
this is how you know
I mean if you were thinking I was a gay kid
I would know who this kid is
my wife is looking at these fucking pictures
during a pregnancy who is this guy
he's a hockey player
wow during a pregnancy. Who is this guy? He's a hockey player.
So we call himself a thirst trap.
Wow. Oh, this is interesting.
This is interesting. We are the history hyenas.
The history of the term thirst trap supposedly comes from Brooks Locke,
right?
He just figured it out.
Oh.
He pulled himself up with a strap and he pretended like he didn't know what he was doing
when he took his shirt off and had jeans on
and was carrying around a fucking axe.
I mean, these celebrities, we are
living in a mental illness right now.
Yeah, guy, you had no idea that's what you were doing.
I guess you were posting that. Why were you posting
that? You want to let people know that you were
going to work? What was the point of that post? And why didn't you have a shirt on?
Yeah, sure. Did it have anything to do with the fact that you work out eight days of fucking
eight days a week, 24 hours a day for those opportunities? Did it have anything to do with
that guy? Yeah. Guys, just shut up and play hockey. Yeah. I mean, there's a reason why me
and Chrissy are fucking doing thirst traps with our shirts off
because our bodies just will never be great.
Yeah, it just will never be great.
That's why I do comedy from the Logitech computer.
That's why I'm on a webcam.
But guys, now that I have a webcam,
should I just become a webcam girl
now that I have an actual webcam?
Should I just do that?
I mean, what's the fucking point?
It was just a wife posting a picture of her husband. That's all it was. Say again? It was just a wife posting a picture of her husband. That's all it was.
Say again? It was just a wife
posting a picture of her husband.
Oh, she's proud. Yeah.
Who took that picture?
Oh, yeah. I mean,
you know what? Yeah, but who the hell is
walking around shirtless with two axes on their
shoulders? I mean, what the fuck is this?
I mean, I would if I look like that.
Also, Big J. Big J, yeah. Here is this? I mean, I would if I look like that. Also, Big J.
Big J, yeah.
Here's the thing that's funny about us, cuz,
is that me and you go through these
little stretches where
we really dedicate ourselves to getting
in shape, and we go super, super hard,
and we really work out as hard
as these other guys, and then
you'll send me a picture
without your shirt on.
And the truth is it's just never really that great.
Yeah.
Me, no matter how hard I work, no matter what I do,
it's just always not that great.
Yeah. I feel like my curse is I work out really hard and I just can never get
in shape. No matter what I do, it just always looks a little off.
And you, no matter what you do. It just always looks a little off.
And you, no matter what you do, you're always within 20 pounds. So you always go 20 pounds up,
20 pounds down. You can't crack it either way. I can't crack it. Like I'll be going to the gym like three, four times a week and then I'll take my shirt off and look in the mirror.
And it's just, it's a challenge to see my penis. Yeah, it's just what it is.
Yeah.
It's just always a challenge to see over the horizon.
Cuz, it's 925.
Is Debo in the waiting room or not?
He's coming on in five minutes.
Oh, in five minutes?
Where the fuck is that squeak?
What the hell?
What is the squeak even doing?
I mean, what is he going to do?
Cuz, he's doing, he's, who knows what he's doing,
but what is a kid from Ridgewood doing?
Doing skits and also perusing the news to find ancient Roman mosaic floors that you text in the group chat and say guys kaka kaka kaka kaka kaka kaka kaka cute cute we found this ancient Roman
mosaic floor was unveiled at I think a vineyard in Italy and uh yeah, Kai, it's just, you know, yeah,
if my friends, that's why I'm happy to be doing this story before Debo comes on, because it's just
nobody in Ridgewater or Middle Village, nobody thinks these stories are interesting. But cuz,
I was cuddled next to my boyfriend last night and we thought it was cute.
So here's this beautiful, this is your HHFOD.
I mean, cuz, you want to get that for the crib, no?
I mean, look at the Romans, the Roman tile work.
I mean, it's not a I don't think it's a coincidence that Italian guys build guys backyards now with stone.
Yeah, because those kids do know how to do cute tile work.
Yeah, that's cute, cutie, cutie fucking tile work.
I mean, you can Google it. Just Google Roman floor on Earth 2000 years ago and you'll see it. It's fucking gorge, gorge, gorge, gie fucking tile work. You can Google it. Just Google Roman floor unearthed 2,000 years ago, and you'll see it.
It's fucking gorge, gorge, gorge, gorge, gorge.
I love how you just said just Google Roman floor unearthed 2,000 years ago.
You can do that, too.
It'll probably come up.
That's not what you meant.
But, you know, whatever it is, because this picture's from 2,000 years ago.
Go Google.
Because Google, my Google, let's just see what does pop up.
Google Roman, Google Roman floor unearthed 2,000 years ago.
Let's just see what pops up.
See what pops up.
Let's just see it.
Yeah.
Floyd Mayweather killed his baby mom.
Yeah.
His dead mother and Chris Rock and Rosie Perez are.
Yeah, what's the problem?
What's going on with that?
What's going on with Chris Rock and Rosie Perez?
Are people mad at them, not mad at them?
What happened with de Blasio or Cuomo?
He just put them, during his press conference,
he brought a little star power, Chris Rock and Rosie Perez,
two New Yorkers to just kind of say, get tested, wear masks and all that stuff.
So it's like.
So what, is there a problem? Are people having a problem with it?
Nobody's really having a problem.
I'm sure there's some tweets going like, you know, I mean, you know,
Chris Rock did say something funny. He was like, you know, make it a happy, happy family outing,
make it a thing. Let's go get tested. It's like, I don't know if it's ever going to be fun, Chris,
you know what I mean? Right. Right. But this is what came up. Roman floor on earth 2000 years ago.
Oh, Germany, Germany. Yeah. Germany. And there's one unearthed in Turkey. It just it's very cool
when these floors do get unearthed because it shows you
how widespread the Roman
Empire was from Turkey
to Great Britain.
The Romans really marched
northwest, east, and south.
You know, they spread that Italian culture
cuz they brought spaghetti everywhere.
They brought spaghetti fucking everywhere and it's,
you know, it's good. Too bad I might
you're more Italian than me.
Unfortunately, it's just what it is.
But you got 10% Sicilian.
That means at one point a Roman soldier went up to one of those wild German tribes.
Because make no mistake, your wildness comes from one of the old Vandal tribes that your genes come from.
And one Roman soldier who knew how to read just fucked the shit out of a German tribeswoman.
And that's the one
Roman that got in your lineage that made you
civilized. He made it. He just
made it in. Cuz, also in
history and in fact of the day,
well, it's not a fact of the day really, it was just
another thing was unearthed on Utah's
Great Salt Lake. Shout
out Mormon, shout out Ryan Hamilton.
A 120-year-old steel shipwreck
that was used to transport building materials for a railroad company. And that's kind of a snoozer, actually. I mean,
who gives a fuck? I mean, so what? You built some pieces of railroad. I mean, who gives a shit?
Give me some real shit, Benetia. Yeah, well, it's actually a cool. Well, here you go. There you go.
Yeah. Let's just go through. Here's why men are pointing loaded guns at their dicks. That's what
I love about weapon history. And we always if we got a a suzer, we always got a banger coming next.
Let's kick it up a notch.
Let's get into the subcultures
inside gun culture online.
It's wild. There's these different levels
of gun culture and hashtags.
There's some guys called fuds.
They like to hunt. There's other guys who are just
responsible gun owners. Then there's guys
who take guns and point them at their dick to
make fun of the guys who like gun regulation, who own guns.
I mean, so they, they troll those guys.
So these are gun owners trolling other gun owners by pointing guns at their
dick to make fun of gun safety laws. I mean, you gotta love this country.
Yeah. I gotta love this country. I mean, cause make no mistake.
If I pointed that gun and actually went off,
all they would get is clit, because I got a clit.
Just what is, cuz, if
our pops actually pointed their
guns at their pieces and
fired, it wouldn't look any
different. Yeah, it wouldn't look any different.
It's what can you do. There he
is. We've been waiting for this moment,
cuz. We look forward to it every
single Friday.
He's still connected to the audio.
Let's see if Debo, his mic's off.
Let's see if Debo can even get this right.
Debo, how are you?
Oh, yeah.
Finally.
Yeah.
You finally.
Wow.
You got a Spin FH shirt on.
Shout out Spin FH, our good friend Chris and Jill's gyms.
Is that allowed?
Is that allowed? That's allowed.
Yeah.
Actually, no.
Cover it up. They need to fucking sponsor
the show. They need to cough up the money.
Yeah, you have to owe me some bucks, too.
No, Spin Forest Hills on Instagram. Go get them.
When it reopens, it's great.
You know what's good about Debo on this Friday?
During what America's
going through? He's a fucking stone-cold
full-throttle chain-out guy.
Yeah.
You had a chain? What happened to yours?
Me? Mine. Yeah. You had a chain. What happened to yours? Me?
Mine?
It was a little stormy in here one day and it,
let's just say it broke.
Hurricane?
Tropical storm?
Yeah.
Tropical hurricane.
Yeah.
It was just a storm through the DMs and then it got ripped off and
thrown.
What can you do?
What are you doing?
Now,
now we were talking about before, Debo,
they said that there could be major layoffs at JetBlue.
Are you worried as a pilot that you could get laid off?
I hope not.
I don't know.
I'm good until September right now, so far.
All right.
But I'm still flying, man.
It's kicking ass.
What did you eat for breakfast today?
Watermelon.
You want to see some?
Fucking watermelon.
There it is.
Yeah, there it is.
Yeah.
I like a little watermelon. Because it is. Yeah. Watermelon.
Because watermelon is delicious.
It's also good for fiber.
It makes me pee too. A lot.
It makes me pee.
I gotta stop eating at night.
Because watermelon makes Debo pee.
It's what it is.
When you know you gotta
come on the show, the fans look forward to it so
much that they were even suggesting
that we do Friday as opposed to Wednesday when we go once a week
because they were saying we need to do Squeak of the Week with Debo.
But Chris told the good news.
He said, you are fortunately available whatever day we pick
to come on and do Squeak of the Week once a week, no?
Unfortunately, I'm never busy.
So, yeah, I'm probably always available.
So you'll be available if we decide Wednesdays. You'll be available Wednesdays at 930. unfortunately i'm never busy so yeah i'm probably always available so you're always so you're always
you'll be available if we decide wednesdays you'll be available wednesdays at 9 30 yeah why not 9 30
a.m 9 30 p.m what's the difference when do you work when when are your work days i don't leave
until like 11 okay so you'll be you'll be good to go let me ask you a question like a lot of
other unscrupulous pilots do you got another family in another city?
No.
Guys, let me just ask you this.
Let me ask a follow-up question, Debo.
Ask a follow-up question.
Can you give me the definition of unscrupulous?
Scrotum sack.
Yeah.
Is that what it is?
Guys, if you heard what Debo said, Debo the doctor, if you dehydrate out there, just eat a bunch of watermelon.
It makes you pee.
Yeah.
All right, Debo. So let's get to it. Who'd you pick this out there just eat a bunch of watermelon it makes you pee yeah all right so let's get to it who'd you pick this week there was a wild week who's your squeak of the week this week well i mean it was a long week and i just woke up yesterday bad so i didn't really
get to think about it oh yeah you guys were drinking a lot right you guys were drinking i
mean patty fly balls was fucking hammered yeah that kid's out of control i gotta start hanging
out with that guy right right all right so you were drinking a lot but so who'd you pick who's your squeak of the week i'm gonna pick you two for almost canceling this thing and get me out of control. I got to start hanging out with that guy. Right, right, right. So you were drinking a lot. But so who'd you pick?
Who's your squeak of the week?
I'm going to pick you two for almost canceling this thing
and getting me out of two jobs.
I'm losing JetBlue.
Wow!
I'm losing JetBlue and I might lose this.
Fuck, I didn't see it coming.
That's a great one.
Wow!
Wow!
We're the squeaks of the week.
You fucking two squeaks.
That's the best squeak of the week answer we've ever had that is a good one yeah i mean you know
what we came to our senses but we fucking definitely deserve that award that's coming
up for six day bender right there you till holy shit no goddamn brainer what are you doing tonight
you drinking tonight what's going on i gotta work sometime but but maybe probably. All right. All right, Bubbas. I love that he said we almost canceled this thing and he almost lost two jobs.
He almost lost two jobs.
Because who would you rather meet if you went back in history?
I'll give you a multiple choice.
Would it be Jesus, Abraham Lincoln, or Keith Hernandez?
I'm going to go Keith, even though I can see him now.
But Keith then and now.
If you could do cocaine with one met, who would it be?
One met?
From the 86 World Series team.
From the 86?
I got to probably get the guy who did it best, and that was Keith.
Keith?
Yeah, it's good.
Yeah.
You know, Keith, sometimes at first base,
he had a little cocaine residue on his fucking Magnum PI mustache.
Yeah, Doc was the big guy, but like
he did other things. Like he was too hardcore
for me. So I just go, Keith,
went along a little below. Just a little bit.
Will you come on? Can we have you as a
guest and we do the 1986
Mets, History of the Mets? What do you think?
I'm reading the book right now.
You read it? You know how to read?
Bro, the pandemic does crazy shit.
Is there a lot of pictures in it?
There's only like three pages. That's when I stopped.
All right, Bubba. Debo can read. There you go.
Way to go, me.
All right, Bubbs. All right, baby.
We'll do the history of the Mets one day.
We'll see you on Wednesday and we're going to do the history of the Mets.
Actually, when you're done reading that book, let us know.
We'll do the history of the Mets. All right're done reading that book let us know we'll do the history of the Mets
alright sure
no problem
alright bubbies
I'm just going to turn
my phone off
because I still don't know
how to get out of here
yeah just start it
yeah the kid does it all
look at those baby hands