Hollywood Handbook - Grace Helbig, Our Close Friend

Episode Date: January 20, 2014

Sean and Hayes quickly dig into some blind items as they name names and Draw the Blinds Up on Hollywood’s biggest stars. Then new media celeb GRACE HELBIG drops by to give listeners some tips on how to create a presence online and explain how vlogging on YouTube is very different than Saved by the Bell. Finally, Grace tells us which A-List Hollywood celebs she would most like to see fail as she reaches into the Popcorn Gallery.See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

This is a HeadGum Podcast. It's just like they're so high and mighty about like morals and stuff. Yeah. But then when it comes right down to it, like it turns out they actually want you to be a slave. Yeah. The most immoral thing. Hey, welcome to the Hollywood Handbook. What up, what up? An insider's guide to kicking butt and dropping names at the red carpet lineback hallways of this industry we call showbiz. I'm Hayes Davenport. I'm here with Sean Clements.

And I'm so sorry, Hayes. I what up, what upped over you saying the subtitle to our show. Sometimes I forget that that's going to happen. But now let's get a nice, clean what-up-what-up to all our Hollywood handbook listeners. And we are excited to report that you may recall that Engineer Sam, a few episodes ago, Engineer Sam, a few episodes ago, was let go from the show with cause for breaking his own motorcycle and not being able to make it to the studio on time. So we had to... Yeah, he got mad, smashed his motorcycle, made up some cockamamie story,

and ultimately came to us in tears, came clean about what happened, and we decided to be generous. And so he is back in the studio. On a trial basis. And he made a generous donation to the show, and we appreciate that from all our listeners. And speaking of generous donation to the show, just to get this out of the way right up top, I don't think we're going to do it at the end of the show. Please buy the pro version, and this month, if you buy the pro version,

you will get your very own Hollywood Ham Book, which is a series of photographs of all the different spiral-cut hams that Hayes and I have made for our joint holiday feasts over the past few years. And these are some really gorgeous hams, glazed and I don't know what else. And we also have, when Engineer Sam was fired, we gave him a motorcycle, sort of a parting gift for all engineers. Now that he's back, obviously now we have this motorcycle to give away for just anyone who buys the pro version. Vroom, vroom.

We wanted to quickly dig into some blind items. This is a segment that we really love to do called Draw the Blinds Up, where we take real blind items from the internet, little pieces of gossip where they don't name names of who they're about. And I like to say it. I like to say, draw the blinds up. We name them. We take these blind items and we name names. Well, because it's a lot of half-truths being pushed around Hollywood by all these gossip mongers.

And Hayes and I think it's something of a responsibility. We are at all the parties. We do see what really goes down. We do know the context for a lot of it. So rather than having you guessing and wondering at some of these stories, why don't you get the straight dope from your good friends, Sean and Hayes. It's a biblical message that we try to follow. We're both very spiritual.

I'm so spiritual. I mean, I'm 1-8th Navajo, and so it's like I'm just so connected. It's all the same God to you. And there's a ton of them. There's a ton of gods, and it's all one God. An eagle is a God. Just a blade of grass is a God. Yeah, a pile of water could be a God.

And the passage in the Bible of let the light shine in. Love the Bible. And the Bible of like, let the light shine in. And they're the Bible. And they're there on the blade of grass is the is the truth to be found. Yes. So let's start with. So good.

Let's start with the first blood item. It's from blindgossip.com, and the headline is, He Made Her a Different Person. Ariana Grande just won a People's Choice Award for Favorite Breakout Artist. In the new issue of Teen Vogue, she talks about the negative effects a former relationship had on her.

I was dating a boy who made me a different person, and my family was like, you've lost your light, you are constantly distracted. If I waited too long to text him back, it was the the end of the world and it was just a very unhealthy relationship what's the name of this site blind gossip yeah should be deaf dumb and blind gossip because they they weren't listening to what really went on they're dumb idiots and blind gossip is already the name. I think it's straight up irresponsible the way they report her talking about our friend Peyton Manning that way. Now, he's got a family, number one. So, of course, he wants you to text back right away because he might be not with his wife.

Maybe she just went to the bathroom or something. Sure. If he is texting you, that means he has a window. If he texts you, is it on? You've got to let him know, yes or no, because otherwise he'll probably go do something with his kids or whatever. And she was actually being pretty demanding at the time in their relationship, asking that he not spend so much time with his best friend, Papa John Schnatter. Which was really the line – or I'm sorry, was really the straw that really hurt the camel on this relationship because it broke its whole back. Because he was there. Papa John has been there.

Like he predates the relationship with Ariana by – like from the beginning. Like that's his best friend. And there's sort of a package deal. This is what people know. If you enter into a relationship with Peyton, you have to accept that he is going to be on the road a lot, that he has a wife and children, and that his best friend is Papa John Schnatter. Yeah. And they're going to be on the curb waiting for a ride because he's going to leave you on the side of the road,

which is what he did, which is why she said such nasty things. And I hate, I hate, hate, hate, hate degrading women. But bros do come before hoes in this particular instance. It makes me angry. I don't like that it's that way. And I think that society has some thinking to do. And, but, but if you think about it, if you think about who gets to get on lifeboats first,

when a ship is sinking, then that's hoes before bros. I hate that word hoes. But is that sexist? Is that sexist? Yes. That's the question shouldn't it be who's strong enough to like get the lifeboat and punch everybody else out just hit him with a big oar yeah punch him out hit him with an oar whatever you need to get on the lifeboat it's called a lifeboat not a friggin chick boat here's a blind item from radar online this one alleges that a world-famous actress overdosed on a drug and booze combination and

her seizure was caught on video she's still alive and the clip is being presented in court as part of a child custody battle and the site declines presented in court as part of a child custody battle. And the site declines to name the actress. There's a couple of points of confusion on this one, because we were actually in the room for this. And drinking a lot of the booze and taking a lot of the drugs. I think I know sort of how this happened. I know that Eli Manning dressed up as a lady for saturday night live and i think this blind item or whoever's reporting on this saw payton uh-huh confused him for eli saw payton remembered eli remembered that saturday night live sketch where he's dressed as a woman

and then wrote down there it was an actress. And made the connection, like, this is that actress that I saw on TV. It was Peyton Manning. And it wasn't a seizure. It was a cool new dance. It was due to the drug and booze cocktail that's what made him dance so well that's what let the inhibitions go and this is what's so great about drugs and alcohol better living through chemistry some people say um you can actually release your inhibitions and

experience life from another dimension almost it lets you do things that you wouldn't necessarily, that you'd be too scared to do in your normal life. Well, it's a perspective you just wouldn't have. I mean, your brain doesn't naturally have that perspective. So when you're able to sort of peek in, you know, through this other world, you know, where you're drunk or high, it's like, how fucking exhilarating is that? Because the truth is, if you read the books

and if you look at the science, we actually only do use 10% of our brain, just the front part. And when you drink a beer, or if you do like a big drug, it opens up, it activates, like little sparks kind of go off in different parts of your brain.

And now you're starting to use things. Now you're using 12%, 15%. Oh, now you're using to use things now you're using 12 15 oh now you're using 76 and you're doing such an amazing dance that all of a sudden you look like you're having a seizure to some idiot who doesn't know the difference between Peyton Manning and an actress Eli Manning let's get into one more blind item uh this is from Defamer. The headline is, Which Hollywood star tried to bribe the CIA for $50,000 of cocaine? In a new book written by a 34-year CIA employee, he makes some shocking allegations about an unnamed Hollywood movie star

who was willing to spy in exchange for primo drugs. He says the actor approached the agency and somehow knew that another big stars production company had an association with the CIA's clandestine service over the years. Now this guy was offering his own name and services to us in exchange for the best $50,000 stash of cocaine they could find. And that actually, that is correct. That was Aziz Ansari.

We're going to be right back with our guest, Grace Helbig. She's a new media celebrity. She has a lot of YouTube fans and she's going to talk to Sean and I about how if we wanted to, which we don't,

to sort of expand our profile into the YouTube sphere. Coming right up on Hollywood Handbook. Hollywood Handbook. So I pound my fist on the table and I go, Paula, Dean, If you use that word again, I'm not giving you any more of my Meemaw's recipes. Yeah. Well, she called my bluff. I called hers. What was the word? I don't remember, actually. Hey! Hey! Welcome to Hollywood Handbook, an insider's guide to kicking butt and dropping names in the red carpet linebacker hallways of this industry we call showbiz. Very exciting guests we have today for a couple reasons.

Grace Helbig is here. Yay! Right? Yeah, I am here. Grace is sort of a new media celebrity. The people who listen to our show might not be acquainted with who you are because we tend to deal in the traditional media of movies, television, music, terrestrial radio. But you're on the internet. Yeah, I'm on YouTube. Yeah.

Big time. But it doesn't mean you're not a celebrity. It's just a different kind of celebrity. Yeah, it'm on YouTube. Yeah. Big time. But it doesn't mean you're not a celebrity. It's just a different kind of celebrity. Yeah, it's new. It's new territory. But you've never done an Earwolf podcast before. Is that right? That is correct.

I have never done an Earwolf podcast. So I guess this is a good time for all the other podcasts to line up. I guess this is a good time for all the other podcasts to line up and one by one they can suck these. Wow. And when he says these, he's pointing to an Ariadne's body that is bulbous and it's generous. It's there. So let's generous. It's there. And so let's see who's first. Because this is a very cutting edge guest to have. We're kind of ahead of the curve.

So let's talk about who's behind the curve. Who's up first for us? Jeff Garland is first in line. By the way, Jeff Garland, better luck next time getting Grace Helbig as a guest. Okay. Fogel Nest Files. How about Old Foggy Nest Files because you don't have a cutting edge new wave, new media guest. Wow.

Professor Blassoff. Professor Takeoff. Take a hike, buddy. Totally lame. I think that one speaks for itself. Yeah, nothing Take a hike, buddy. Totally lame. I think that one speaks for itself. Yeah, nothing to do with that one. Totally lame. That's right.

You nailed it the first time. How did this get made? How did you not get this good guest? This seems like you guys should be more supportive of the other shows. Well, they know what they did, and they know what they're going to have to do in the future, which is one by one line up, get downtown, and suck on these. Now you're both pointing.

Yeah. All right. So, Grace. Yes. As we were saying, Sean and I have done ventures for television and movies and things of that. We could go on all day about what the best way is to get into those. Right. That's right.

That is what we do. And we have, and we've done it earlier on this show, and we'll do it on the next show. But that's not what you're here to talk about. That's not what you're here to talk about. What we're interested in is primarily for our listeners. This is not something that we are. We don't really need to get into this ourselves. But for all the listeners out there to try and become new media celebrities like you. Right.

What the best way is to go about it. Oh, yeah. There's a lot of ways that you can go about creating a presence for yourself online cool okay so so let's just say i you know i don't know why i would i want to now get into the online space okay just as a guy so what would the first thing you have me do okay well the first thing uh do do you have a Twitter account or a YouTube account? Those seem great. Do I, you know, Blenjamin runs a lot of my web presence for me.

That's my second assistant. Okay. So I don't. Where would we go if we wanted to get one? If we wanted to get one. Who do we talk to? Where do we go for something like that? Okay, let's pretend I don't for the sake of argument.

Okay, for the sake of argument, well, the obvious first step is just to get your computer and open it. Great. Beautiful. Yes. That's awesome. And here it is. That's right here in the computer.

Now, that's a book. That's not a computer. Your computer's the... Well, it's a book. That's not a computer. Your computer's the... Well, it's a book about computers. Yes, yes. So, in a way, it is. See, this speaks... And I've heard them called MacBooks.

It's true. That is true. But I have the computer haze, and it's right here. That's a bottle of water. Mm-hmm. And you were just drinking out of it. Okay. Okay, oh right, but I, well, this is

then the juice for the computer. No, okay, don't ever put the water on the computer. That's probably a good tip. We're getting somewhere now. The computer, see that big square silver thing on the table? Mmm. Yep, that's the computer. Okay, that's not

a boombox because I've heard music come out of it. No, it is not a boombox. That is your MacBook. How you were able to purchase that MacBook, confusing to me, but you have it here, so let's use that. I went to a movie that was premiering for the first time, and they gave it to me in a bag. Oh, well, lucky you.

Jobs. The Jobs movie? Mm-hmm. How was it? About two hours long. Okay. So we're going to open the computer. You just lift the top.

The top. The top part. And, okay. Nope, that's, okay. Oh, all right. Okay, yeah. It's stuck or it's sticking or it's, okay. Oh, all right. Okay, yeah. It's stuck or it's sticking or it's locked somehow. It's not locked.

You just have to pull harder. There's got to be a latch. No, there's no latch. There's no, don't try. Oh, try typing in the code. It's my birthday. Don't put that in there. Okay, ready?

And, ah, you did it. It's open, see? Okay, you did it. It's open, see? Okay, you did it. Yeah, I see. Yeah. I see now. Now, next step, we're going to turn it on. Great.

Yes. Okay. I did it. No, you didn't. You hit the space bar. That's the biggest button. Yeah, it is, but there's a circle in the corner that you're going to hit. Bluetooth, activate.

No, it's not how it works. There's a circle right there. It's like a Ouija board. I have to use like a paper clip? No, you use your finger and you just drag it over like a Ouija board. And when do I apply the juice? No, don't put the water on it. Okay, okay, but it needs power. No, it has power. You just have to hit the button. Don't, okay. So like a Ouija board, you're not supposed to move it too hard if I just kind of put it near the button.

Okay, you're there, you're there, you're there, you're there. So push it. Okay, I'm holding it down. Yep. And is it, did you put? Okay, it's on. It's on. Okay, yay, look, the screen.

A screen, hooray. God, it's so bright. You, okay. Yeah, what can we do about that? It's, I think it'll be okay. I think, but you need to put in your password. Right, mm-hmm. Did you?

Uh. Do you remember your password? What is it? What is it? I mean... Is it one of the kids? This is going to be a second. Is it one of the kids? Or is it one of the birds?

Hayes has rare birds. Oh, yeah? Yeah. He's got an African gray. Oh. Let me try my an African gray. Oh. Let me try my different bird names. Okay. Engineer Sam.

That's it. Oh. I got it the first time. Wow. That's very impressive. Okay. So, this is going to be a little more complicated. You're going to go onto an internet browser.

Sure. So, there is... and that's right over here we put this into the into the computer drive no don't put the pencil in there there's a dock on the very bottom of the screen where there's all these icons you see those icons yes yes there's a bunch of icons on the bottom and one's going to look like it's going to say Safari on it it's going to look like a little watch or something

well you're getting a little close actually to the computer now and this is mine we don't have to do all this touching the computer sorry well you're just not you're just whirling the mouse you're not explaining it so clearly

And it may not But it's not totally clear the way you're doing it Now, D for doctor No All you have to do is drag the mouse Down to the bottom of the screen Please move your hand back I just am trying to get you to go to

YouTube.com Here we go. No, don't drag the... You're dragging the computer off the table. Don't do that. You said to the bottom. See the square on the bottom of your keyboard. I'm sorry. Can we back up?

There's no dock on here. There's a... Are you... What are you thinking of? Sitting on the dock. oh my god okay there is an icon there look i clicked it sorry i clicked it okay well okay get the cleaning bill for uh great uh so now you're Great So Now You're gonna go into the top of that screen And type in youtube.com Top of the screen Top of the screen

And you type And you tap Nope It's not a touch screen It's definitely not a touch screen It's with the keyboard Oh well you said to type it on the top of the screen I did

That was my bad So Go up into that. See the little white space up there? MeTube.com. No, YouTube.com. That's what I'm doing. MeTube.com.

Okay. It's Y-O-U. That's U. Yes. Tube. Gracetube.com. No, no. It's not Gracetube.com.

It's YouTube.com. Hazetube. One thing, okay, there's an Apple on the back of this. There's an Apple on the back of my phone. So why can't I touch the screen on this? You know, that's a valid question, but this device has been created so you don't have to do that. Finally, some recognition.

Yeah. So, did you type in? What did you type in? I typed in engineersamtube.com. Okay, that's not... That's the password. That's the password that got you in your computer. But you need to type in youtube, Y-O-U-T-U-B-E

dot com. Oh, okay. Thank you. Yeah. Ah, there. Yay! Look at YouTube. Doesn't it look pretty? Have you ever been on YouTube before yeah of course a million times okay very doubtful but so we just type into this bar

yeah and we can watch any videos any of our favorite videos yeah you can watch all of your favorite videos and you can register for an account and upload your own videos maybe videos of your birds, for example. Well, let's watch. Do you want to take a second to watch some of our favorite YouTubes?

Yes, my little cousin has been showing me YouTubes. Okay. And the advances in these computer videos is just mind-wrecking. Yeah, I would agree. And it really just knocks me out and so Hayes I think I uh yes you've been sending me some of these YouTubes they're yeah I think I emailed you some they are incredible I mean it's like a theater experience in your home but it's being done completely by amateurs you know with just a little elbow grease and initiative. Yeah.

Do you want to watch one now and then we can talk about some of the videos? Let's watch one. Because you know, you're on this. Yeah. You know, you'll probably know some of these. Yeah, I'd love to see it. You probably know the people that made them. They're your neighbor or something.

Probably, maybe. But yeah, show me your favorites. Okay, here's one that we think is really good. Okay. Okay, this is a full-length movie. Well, this is just the beginning. This is an hour and 40 minutes. You're showing me the color purple.

It's only one hour and 38 minutes. You're showing me the color purple, It's only one hour and 38 minutes. You're showing me the color purple the entire full-length film on YouTube. Oh, so you do know this YouTube video. Okay. I know the movie. YouTube videos, you know, for the most part are like shorter little clips and snippets of things. Okay, we've seen this. So it'll be like, it'll be broken into like 14 parts.

No, no. You guys are watching movies on YouTube. We can watch a different one. I think that's, okay. Let's see. Have you seen this one? This is the Banger Sisters. This is another full.

It's about a woman named Suzette. She's fired from her job as a bartender at the Whiskey A Go-Go. This is a movie. Time to reevaluate her life at that point, I bet. This is a movie. You're just showing me movies. You're just showing me movies. Well, what we like to say is TV is small movies. TV is small movies.

We've always said that. Okay. And YouTubes are just computer TVs. In certain points, yes. So we speak on that. So it's computer small movies. Yeah, would you speak on that, please? Can I speak on computer small movies?

Well, the YouTubes is computer TVs. Computer TVs, yeah, in a way they are. But, you know, the new media space that is evolving is not just movies. It's other things outside of movies and television shows. Well, now, okay. Now, you've been at the center of some controversy of late. You, I believe, claim to have started vlogging.

You, I believe, claim to have started vlogging. And also, Kevin Spacey claims that he started it with his House of Cards character, the direct-to-camera address. Vlogging where you've seen it on, like, Malcolm in the Middle. I think they started doing it after Spacey did. They did it after Spacey. Zach Morris used to do it after he saw Spacey doing it. That's where you turn into the camera lens. Those are television shows that use a device to get you through the show.

Vlogging is not a television show. It's a different form of content. Because it's on your phone. Not always on your phone. Sometimes it's on a camera. Well, it's on Netflix. A lot of these phones have cameras now. Yes.

That is also true. My little cousin was showing me some of these pictures that he takes with his camera, and it's just insane. Well, he's a whiz. Oh, yeah. Yeah, I'm sure. But yeah, vlogging on YouTube is very different than Saved by the Bell. Okay, now, I disagree. Would you speak on that?

I think I just spoke on it. Well, specifically what the differences are, if any. Well, it's almost all completely different yes you do address a camera directly but it's not based that sounds like the same thing well it's not based in a narrative form huh and it's is that something to think about for you guys to really take it to the next level i don know. To really tell a story so that your viewer cares, can really get involved in the characters. It's not a character. It's me as me.

And it's not fictional. And then you as you. Yeah. Are you commenting on the inner workings of the Senate or politics? No, not at all. And are they right behind you? Not at all. And some of your early vlogs, do they start with, now watch this?

No. Is that something to think about? Because when you think about stakes for what you're doing, when the viewer's watching, they want to know that they're- Steaks are so important. It's really very important. It's so important. Their steaks are delicious. Okay.

You're okay. Okay. That was very funny and you got me pretty good. Okay. That was very funny and you got me pretty good. But I think that you and I, and Hayes, and maybe even Engineer Sam know. No, I actually knew what she was talking about the whole time. From the very beginning, from the first time she said it, I knew that she was making a joke and it didn't fool me even for one second. Not for one second.

You knew. I've been doing this for way too long to be fooled by something like that. It didn't get you and you saw her sort of wind up for it. Try and catch me 20, 30 years ago. You might have been able to get me on something like that. Nope. Not today, sister. Not today.

I've learned a lot from you guys today. Well, we're all. And that's what it is. It's a co-op. It's a sharing community. Yeah, that's what YouTube is. It's a community that shares. Yeah, see? It's a sharing community. Yeah, that's what YouTube is. It's a community that shares. Yeah, see?

It's a collaborative community that supports each other. Unlike traditional media that's a little bit more competitive, YouTube was founded on collaboration as a means to success. Where you can just email the YouTube guys your ideas and they say like we will take this this and this one and then they give you a budget no no everything is um you know all most youtubers do everything themselves they youtubers i like that yeah yeah it's a you already have a little name for yourself yeah it's a a cute little description of what we are. Yeah, everyone kind of shoots the videos themselves, puts up their own money.

Sometimes there are brand deals and financing, but it's you comfortable taking an endorsement from, like, let's say a Samsung Galaxy GS4 when you know that it's so fast that it's almost frightening? Because isn't that possibly a conflict of interest that people could be scared by how fast and user-friendly the Samsung is? No. I think that that would be the reason that I would take that brand deal. If it is a helpful product to promote for the audience, I think that that's great. So you're telling me the Samsung is the best phone on the market. Sorry. You're telling me the Samsung is the best phone on the market and that you're 100% comfortable promoting it on your page. Are you?

Well, I'll take your word for it, and I said it too. Are you sponsored by Samsung? No, absolutely not. No way. I wish we could get a sponsor like that, although I'd be a little worried about how fast their phone service is. I'll show you how not sponsored we are. I just texted that message into a note,

and I can just tap it against Sean's phone, and then he'll get the same message too. And now I'm reading it on my phone. That we're not sponsored by Samsung. And all I had to do was tap my phone to his. You both have Samsung phones. Well, yeah, it's the fastest 4G on the market right now. Yeah, and earlier when I said there was an Apple on the back of my phone,

that was a funny joke for the audience. Now, let's dig into the popcorn gallery, shall we? Oh. Should we cue our theme? Oh. We have a theme now. Whoa. Oh whoa oh we do somebody made a popcorn gallery theme this will take me so sometimes normal people don't have access to all the big showbiz movers and shakers that haze and i do so we will give them an opportunity to reach out and ask a question

as if they could talk to you. Okay. That's very generous. And we call that the popcorn gallery because people eat popcorn at the movies. Yeah. I see what you guys did there. Andy Neese made a theme for the Popcorn Gallery, and so we're accessing the SoundCloud,

which is like the sound component of a YouTube. YouTube is like the visual track, and you cut it together with the SoundCloud, and then you get the... You lay those together. Look who we're telling. I mean, you must have to insert the SoundCloud into your YouTubes all the time. Fluffy one

That was Andy Nese's theme for the Popcorn Gallery. It's a little short. It's only 33 seconds long. We are going to play it before every question that we ask. We'll insert it later. For a theme for a segment that we do within the larger show, I would prefer it to be... Four or five minutes.

Yeah, at least a few minutes longer than that one is, but maybe Andy can take it back to the lab and come up with a different theme for next time that's a little bit better. Do you have any ideas on things he could add to the songs? You know, I would suggest maybe a little shorter, actually. Oh, okay. Oh, all right, taking a minimalist route. Yeah, maybe a little less

anxiety ridden um yeah a little less panic attack inducing here's a question from our listener toby keith sweat grace how much money do you get paid for an appearance on at midnight and how much does that average out per minute of screen time? Wow, that is a question I have never answered before. Hey, do we not reach into the popcorn gallery anymore because we have the song now? That's a good question. I think we probably should reach in because that's where we get the questions. Yeah. Okay, so let's reach.

I'm so sorry. We have to reach into the popcorn. Okay, let's reach into the popcorn bag. I want this one particular piece of popcorn. Yes. This is a question from our listener, Toby Keith Sweat. How much money do you get paid, Grace, for an appearance on At Midnight, and how much does that average out per minute of screen time?

Wow, that is a question. per minute of screen time wow that is a question uh you know i'm not totally sure with taxes taken out and things going to managers etc i i don't know how to answer that one like just a doll i think the way to do it would be just a dollar figure. Yeah, you're writing this down. Why are you writing this down? I don't know. I just like to know how people are doing. Okay, well, I don't know for sure. I haven't gotten the check yet, so I can't really.

It's just one check. It's just one check, yeah. And how big is it about? They're sort of dicking you around on this one? I think they're doing their accounting just fine i just haven't received it yet yeah giving you the the high hard one giving you the old uh hard dick giving you the giving you the rope-a-doop i've seen that what uh tough Tough. Chris Hardwick. Yeah.

Do you get to talk to him before and after the show? Really? Yeah, he's a very, very pleasant man and is actually a big inspiration in what I hope to do in the new media space. Hosting aftershows? No. Everything but that. Here's a question from Matt Cameron

Grace which oh I'm sorry I don't understand that here's a question from Matt Cameron Grace which A-list Hollywood celebs would you most like to see fail oh wow that seems very mean spirspirited.

And, you know, I really just kind of want everyone to do well. Is that... Really? You're shaking your head? Well, Chris Brown beat Rihanna. That's true. So maybe him. You want him to succeed?

I will say Chris Brown. Everyone except him you want to see do well? Why not? Who would you want to see fail? Well, O.J. Simpson, I personally believe, murdered his ex-wife. Okay. And as a result of that, I hope he doesn't do that well in the business. I'd like to see him thrown out of the business entirely.

I believe that his son did it and that well in the business. I'd like to see him thrown out of the business entirely. I believe that his son did it and that he covered that up and so I actually want him to be getting in trouble for that too. And so I want to see him in less movies in 2014. Okay, I think that's a good New Year's resolution.

This is empty. Okay. Here's a question This part. This is empty. Okay. Here's a question from our listener, Chanson, who actually specifically suggested that we bring you onto the show. Oh, yeah. He had requested you. We said no thanks, and he kept at us, and we're so happy to have you now. Great.

Here's a question for our listener, Chanson. Grace, is YouTube like being in small movies? Or is it like being in real movies? Or is it not as good as both? Did you write this question? No, this is a question from our listener, Chanson. Okay. He lives in Seattle.

Okay. He's from Seattle. He talks about that a lot. That's great. Kind of a mean-spirited guy. I feel like you wrote this question down. Is YouTube like being in small movies? No, it's...

Is YouTube like being in small movies, or is it like being in real movies, or is it not as good as both? Or is it not as good as both? YouTube is kind of its own thing. It's really not movies at all whatsoever. So we give you a movie contract today. Uh-huh.

And you say, no thanks. It's a three-picture deal. It's worth $6 million. Wow. And you don't want to do that. No, I wouldn't say no. You already did. I didn't say no.

You already said it's a different thing. You don't want to do it. I didn't say I didn't want to do no. You already said it's a different thing. You don't want to do it. I didn't say I didn't want to do it. I just said it's a different thing. In fact, my friends and I did... Oh, you're ripping up... Smaller pieces, Hayes? At this point,

I could still put it back together pretty easily with just some tape, so if you could make smaller pieces out of the contract. And just really shred it into little tiny pieces. It's getting so small, it's hard to tear. Yeah, well, you're folding it first. Don't make even lines. Try to make it more jagged. This seems...

And we'll be throwing these out in multiple separate trash cans so if Engineer Sam wants to climb into the dumpster later and try to put it all back together Will you let us know when you're going to be passing outside the window of the studio when you leave and so we can kind of dump it out

just sort of a rain of confetti over you as you go and then you can just come back up and give us the confetti. Okay. And the three-picture deal Hayes was talking about? Yeah. Those weren't just pictures.

Those were movies. Whoa. Hard to glean. Thank you for clarifying. I really feel like a dick for passing that up. That's how big a deal it was. It was huge. It's already so small.

Grace, we're almost out of time. Do you have any projects coming up that you'd like to plug on our show? Anything that you're really excited about? Yeah, I actually have a movie to plug. Oh, wow. Yeah, my friends Hannah Hart and Mamrie Hart and I made a movie called Camp Dakota. And it's going to be released digitally

through your computer. Oh, my gosh. Yeah. And then I just bring my computer down to the ArcLight or whatever movie theater and I sit down. And they plug it into the screen. They have these cables now. No, you just watch at home on your computer or you can hook your computer up to your television and watch on your television.

Wow. I don't own a TV, but maybe I'll go to Hayes'. Okay. Well, it's coming out on Valentine's Day, so you guys can spend a day together and watch it. It's like a sort of it sounds like you're saying it's like a 21st century banger sisters where you're

taking those old archetypes and sort of updating them to the YouTube generation. But now it's on skateboards or whatever it is. It's no skateboards. It's just a movie about a girl going back to camp. From?

From working as a bartender at the Whiskey A Go-Go in Los Angeles. No, not at all. She gets fired, got to go back to camp, takes stock. To see her old friend Susan Sarandon. Nope. No, Susan Sarandon is not in it. And Susan's kind of settled down at this point, has a more normal life. She wouldn't do it?

We didn't even think to reach out to her. But maybe the next one we should. Yeah, well, if that happens. Seems like it would at least raise the profile of the project a little bit. If Susan Sarandon was in it. She still has a fair amount of juice. That's true. Can you give my computer a little juice, please?

No, stop. Don't put the water on the computer. Bye. Is this how you end it? This has been an Earwolf Media Production. Executive Producers Jeff Ulrich and Scott Aukerman. For more information, visit Earwolf.com. Earwolfradio.com. EarwolfRadio.com

The wolf dead. That was a HeadGum Podcast.