Hollywood Handbook - John Gemberling, Our LIVE Friend

Episode Date: October 12, 2015

Hayes and Sean are coming at you live from LA Podfest to chat with the very funny JOHN GEMBERLING about their plans for the upcoming WolfCool Fest, including some new show ideas and bestia...lity. Then, the live Popcorn Gallery asks about branding and making movies on computers.See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Transcript
Discussion (0)
Starting point is 00:00:00 This is a HeadGum Podcast. So I turn to JC. Shazay. Yeah. Yeah. And I say Well screw it Let's just get a Shaved ice truck
Starting point is 00:00:29 For the crew You know It's a hot day Yeah And they've been Working really hard And he says It's not clean
Starting point is 00:00:36 Yeah You know Yeah Because you know How he is Yeah He likes Clear
Starting point is 00:00:43 Ice Yes He doesn't want Any flavors Or any syrups And I said Well that Yeah Because you know how he is. Yeah, he likes clear ice. Mm-hmm. Yes, he doesn't want any flavors or any syrups. And I said, well, that's just from a freezer. That's not worth buying a truck for. Uh-huh. You know? And so, anyway, we wound up doing rock, paper, scissors. Uh-huh.
Starting point is 00:01:00 He goes rock. Yeah, of course. I go paper. Uh-huh. About 20 minutes later, the course. I go paper. Uh-huh. About 20 minutes later, the crew's kissing my butt. Yeah, they loved it. Hey, welcome to Hollywood Handbook and Insider's Guide to Kicking.
Starting point is 00:01:15 Wait, wait, just stop. To kicking butt and dropping names in the red carpet linebacker always in this industry we call showbiz. What up, what up? It's just hard. It's just hard to do it. While you guys are making noise. It's hard for me to say what I need to say. But you guys will figure it out as we go. Even my what up, what up didn't really, didn't have space. No.
Starting point is 00:01:35 Kind of what people want to hear. Yeah. So maybe like just to introduce ourselves, you guys are here to see us. But maybe you're here as just like people who want to learn about podcasts and all that, or maybe you're here as just podcast fans, and you don't watch a lot of movies or TV or read magazines or anything. Sean and I are, what would you just like industry? The gods, the kings.
Starting point is 00:02:08 Yeah, that's right. The kings of it. That's right. Yeah. The king of it all. We have done some acting, done some writing. I'm almost embarrassed about the acting we've done. Done some directing.
Starting point is 00:02:19 What would they know us from? Well, I don't know if I'm only thinking of this because i just said kings but like that whole lord of the rings thing was our idea yes that's right and having kings in that and then king kong was like kind of our thing i was um the the dog's boss on job dog uh some some job dog fans here that's nice uh they're everywhere i honestly like yeah you probably get recognized from that more than almost anything else you've done yeah cat dog uh-huh dog you out do you think you thought of that because of the dog thing also i'm just so interested in hearing how you make these connections.
Starting point is 00:03:06 The process? Yeah. No, I had come in with cat-dog loaded up and ready to go. Okay. Did you say something about a dog? Yeah, I said something about a dog. You didn't even hear that? Didn't hear it.
Starting point is 00:03:15 Oh, that's amazing. I was just sort of remembering the days on cat-dog. I was the main friend on Mindy Anna Jones, which is when Mindy Kaling was Indiana Jones. Yeah, and I was the mayor on The Office. The mean mayor who didn't want anyone to have any paper. It's so, I guess they're piping in cheers for Aisha Tyler's show. That is so sad to me.
Starting point is 00:03:53 It's not a competition, you know. For us, it's like, I hope we both do well. And I don't want to know. I honestly don't want to know who she fucked with that decided to put us against her show because i honestly think she's great and i think she deserves a bigger audience i would love for her to get some recognition today and so for her to have apparently crossed someone very powerful yeah who then wanted to submarine her show by putting it right next to sad yeah it sad. Yeah. It hurts. And I asked them, change it. Put us against
Starting point is 00:04:27 nothing. Have us be our own thing. But, you know, that's not how the cards got dealt out. Podfest is not about the podcast anymore. No. Unfortunately. It's gotten extremely corporate. And it's corporate.
Starting point is 00:04:44 And it's used to launch all the big movies. Yeah. You know? And I remember when we first started. 71. Oh, I want to say one. Yeah. And we first started going to Podfest.
Starting point is 00:05:01 And it was just us with our little. Monterey pod. Autograph book. Mm-hmm. pod fest and it was just us with our little monterey pod autograph book and we would and our big thick glasses yes and we'd go excuse me yeah and we were a real very popular show at the time yes we were yes well that was yes of course but still wanting to know yes if it was a real microphone yeah is that a real microphone? Yeah. We're just trying to blend in.
Starting point is 00:05:26 Are those real chairs? Yeah. Is that a wire? Yeah. Is that, who's that? Yeah. You know? Just pointing at everything.
Starting point is 00:05:37 Just so full of wonder back then. Yeah. And it was in, now it's in this fancy hotel when it used to be in the ocean. Yeah. You had to paddle out to a little tiny dinghy. And paddle with your body, not in a boat or anything.
Starting point is 00:05:54 You would swim out. No, not a boat, but you were allowed to have a piece of driftwood or something. Yes, that's right. Those were the old days. Yeah. Emmys. Whoa, yeah. Emmys. Whoa, yeah.
Starting point is 00:06:07 Emmys. Podfest and Emmys is another. Same weekend. They're really asking for it. Scheduling thing. Yeah. Because the Podfest parties now are slamming into the Emmy parties that are going to be tonight. And both crowds get pretty loose.
Starting point is 00:06:24 There's one upstairs. Movies Magazine is going to be tonight. And both crowds get pretty loose. There's one upstairs. Movies Magazine is having a party tonight. Upstairs. Cover to cover. With a knights and princesses theme. Mm-hmm. And then downstairs, Movies Books. Yes.
Starting point is 00:06:43 Which is ours. Yes. That's our magazine yes uh is yeah is going to have a party yeah with like a um aladdin theme and people are this was a problem last year i think they've gotten away for like they had cut holes in the floor so people could pretend that they were in both parties at once but people were using them to take upskirt shots to take upskirt shots and to put the the term flory holes was it invented last year which i don't i personally don't think is is funny and completely inappropriate flory holes. But people would dangle themselves through the
Starting point is 00:07:28 floor slash ceiling and wait for like, hope a tall person. Tall guy. Paul Bunyan type. Yeah, or someone
Starting point is 00:07:37 with like a soft broom, like not too sharp a broom could take care of them to completion, which is in my opinion the worst part of the whole process. Of the flurry hole?
Starting point is 00:07:50 Of the flurry hole thing. Oh, that's the worst part of sexuality for you is the completion. Yes. Well, it's unclean. I mean, JC Chazet will tell you himself that that kind of thing is dirty. I honestly wish it went in reverse and I could bring some dirty stuff in back in yes almost that your wiener's a vacuum yes and you're sucking in anything that's unclean some i can find some unsightly thing and just shoop it in yeah well good luck i hope that you do figure that out
Starting point is 00:08:21 what did we want to do? Oh, yes. I don't know. We were talking about how pod fest is bad. Oh, yes. Nobody likes it anymore. It used to be good.
Starting point is 00:08:34 Now it's bad. Needs to be replaced. And so our, why we're here, sort of our intention for this show. Kind of a big announcement, actually. ...is to announce our own podcast festival.
Starting point is 00:08:50 Wolf Cool Festival will be occurring the same weekend as PodFest from now on. Yes. For as long as PodFest exists, which won't be very long, because Wolf Cool Fest is going to beat the pants off them. Yes. Wolf Cool, for anyone who beat the pants off them. Yes. Wolf Cool, for anyone who doesn't know, that's a shingle. Earwolf gave us our own shingle, which is Calvin and Hobbes Productions. And then Wolf Cool is a subsidiary of Calvin and Hobbes Productions.
Starting point is 00:09:17 But it's a subsidiary. Some subsidiaries own the parent company, which is true in this case. When they get strong enough. It's an upside down umbrella. Yeah. Yeah, that's a good way to picture it. The umbrella has like arms and kind of muscly arms
Starting point is 00:09:34 kind of reaching up. Pulling and squeezing in the top. Yeah, squeezing the top. And being the stronger, more important piece. Like choking it out, not so you're going to hurt it. And being like, you're only alive
Starting point is 00:09:45 because i'm allowing just as it's kind of like drifting off uh and like sort of going on con just like fading out which the parent company actually gets a sexual satisfaction from so something has felt off to me the whole time haze about just doing this. Yes, I know. Yes, I know exactly what you're and they're not really getting the real podcast experience. Yeah, it's your you talk about your leg position. No, that actually people are liking. Oh, okay.
Starting point is 00:10:16 But this is very high up in the air. Yes. Yes, people are like, I wonder if it could go even higher and it can, but just wait, not yet. Your knee is, just for people listening at home, his knee is at nose level. Yes.
Starting point is 00:10:34 But what I was referring to more was that, don't people want to see this thing get engineered in some way? That's right. It's not a podcast without an engineer. Yes. Brett. engineered in some way. That's right. It's not a podcast without an engineer. Yes. Yeah. Brett! Hey, Engineer Brett. You could have that mic. Yeah, you can take
Starting point is 00:10:55 that mic. I heard you kind of coming anticipating that we were going to bring you out. Yeah, you may want to want to not go through with it. Do you see what I'm saying? It made me want to bring you out. Yeah, you may want to be away. I want to not go through with it. Do you see what I'm saying? It made me want to send you back. You're here now, and it's fine.
Starting point is 00:11:12 It's actually not fine. It doesn't feel right. It still feels weird. On the same level. I'm going to move your chair off the stage onto the floor. What's this? What's happening? Do you need help getting up? What's happening? Do you need help? Do you need help
Starting point is 00:11:25 getting up? What's going on? Do you want to sit down here? So, Hayes is talking not into a mic right now, but what he's doing is he's trying to help Brett, and Brett's being rude. This is how you want it?
Starting point is 00:11:44 Yeah, but maybe you don't have that mic. Is the mic weird? Yeah. Is that strange? Feels like we should have one and a half mics each. And the engineer has zero mics. Yes. Do you need help handing the mic to us?
Starting point is 00:12:03 Do you need help? Do mic to us? I thought you wanted me to engineer this. Do you need help? Do you want two mics? Well... Well, no. It'll be between us. We each have one and a half now. Mm-hmm. And now it's in stereo.
Starting point is 00:12:15 Mm-hmm. But you're performing a useful purpose just by sitting there being warm. Yeah, I think everyone feels better now. It's good to know, yes, that the show is ready to be engineered
Starting point is 00:12:36 at any time. So I'm engineering the show. Hang on, don't talk when you don't have a mic, Brett. If needs, must. You need me to engineer? No, but if we did. If an engineering emergency comes up, it's comfortable to have you there. And now it has never come up on any of our studio shows ever before.
Starting point is 00:12:55 No, that's right. The necessity of an engineer, but I've always assumed that were the situation to emerge, you would be very useful. My thing with the engineers is i would rather have it and not need it than need it and not have it just because i've never needed it doesn't mean i don't want to always have it does that make sense brett like gum like gum it's like gum which of course i can't chew yeah well you can chew it once. Yeah. One good chew.
Starting point is 00:13:27 Then I spend the rest of the day getting it out of my teeth. Yes. Getting it out of your teeth, which is out of your mouth. You have to... I love George Washington so much that I installed wooden teeth in part of the back of my mouth. Yeah. Installed. They're very loosely stuck on there with gum.
Starting point is 00:13:49 They need to get redone every now and then. Yes. Yeah, well, I had his chew a bunch of gum, and I stuck the wooden teeth in with that into the gum space. This is a different kind of gum. Yeah. The kind your teeth live in. And the only problem is, yeah yeah when you do chew gum with
Starting point is 00:14:07 wood it just kind of wants to live in there forever yeah hollywood handbook um should we announce our guests for no okay okay well yeah let's bring our guest out we have a guest that's going to help us with our launch of um what's name of our festival? Cool Fest. That's really good. John Gemberling is here. Come on out, John. John. Hi, John. Hi.
Starting point is 00:14:36 Hi. Thank you. Thank you for being here. Hi, everybody. We have a little extra space now. Oh, okay. Are you asking me to move over? We can all spread out a little more.
Starting point is 00:14:46 Yes. John, thank you so much for coming. I still want to have my leg up high. So nice to have you. We were resubmissing about the old pod fest earlier. Do you remember? Those early pod fests? Yes.
Starting point is 00:14:59 On the beach. In the wet part of the beach. I mean, honestly, I don't really listen to podcasts that much right right yes there's no podcast for you are there john it just seems like it's a bunch of like white guys with usb microphones yeah i know walking around yeah yeah i like that's a bad like npr news i like to be aware of what's going on in the world NPR is a bunch of black guys alright
Starting point is 00:15:29 touche touche but the ones hosted by non-white gentlemen like I used to show people are actively trying to sabotage at Podfest
Starting point is 00:15:40 for like racial reasons and I think that's really bad because they scheduled this opposite of it? Yes. Disturbing, no? It is. And I say that quietly.
Starting point is 00:15:51 I don't want my positions on race to be... Does Podfest have a diversity problem? I mean, I... That's the article tomorrow. Yeah. Isn't that an interesting take? And maybe we can try and fix that in the Wolf Cool Fest that we're launching with your help, I hope. I absolutely think maybe we can try and fix that uh in the in the wolf cool fest that we're
Starting point is 00:16:05 launching with your help i hope i absolutely think that we can wolf cool fest is gonna be like everything that's awesome and then some don't you think so hayes yes i think it's gonna be i love how good it's gonna be and i'm fascinated with its smartness The smartness as well as the funniness. Yes. And how nice it is. And I think it'll be cool. Yes. So can you define for me what a podfest is? It's a bunch of podcasts
Starting point is 00:16:35 happening in a hotel. Well that's what a podfest is. And there's dorks there. Huh? Yes. You forgot the dorks. Right, right. Yeah. People got out of their cars.
Starting point is 00:16:53 People shut off the Bluetooth and got out of their cars, came into a hotel to listen to podcasts. Right. The people that are here came on an electric bicycle. Everybody here came on an electric bicycle? Yes. Now what is that? It's like one of those motorcycle bicycles that they ride in South America, but it's electric? Yeah, this one doesn't power itself, but it has an electric battery on the back that they are charging to power their house when they get home.
Starting point is 00:17:23 Oh, so pedaling the bicycle charges a battery that they then plug into their Tesla house battery. Shared home. Right? That makes sense to me, and it's true. And we were talking about the nicest new podcast new podcast festival yes and the one that really rocks yes and i think that when you look at the way pod fest is done is they get all these different podcasts and people who do podcasts it's weird yes and and it's kind of like well the audience
Starting point is 00:18:04 isn't going to want to see all that stuff. Yeah. They really would probably rather see kind of just me and Hayes and maybe John. Doing other people's shows. Oh, there should still be a lot of shows. Betterly. Yes. So all different shows, but just us three doing.
Starting point is 00:18:24 That's interesting. Oh, wow, John. That could be really good john i like john's idea yeah that's what but i'm just repeating what you guys just said oh speak on that for me yes well you said it would be a bunch of different podcasts but with us i'm with you already good. And so this kind of thing, I think we should try and do more of. Just clarifying and reiterating. Yes, yes. Like, what are some things
Starting point is 00:18:54 that we're going to have at Wolf Cool Fest? Oh, gosh. Podcasts. We'll have... Well, so John, for instance, I'd love for you to host one. I mean, you're known as something of a sexual deviant how so what is that how's that come to just a sort of fringe sexuality
Starting point is 00:19:13 things is a pet interest of yours oh you think those are normal things um well you know when you do anything long enough it becomes sort of common mainstream yeah so your you give you your idea is to do a specific sex act such a long time that it just becomes like background noise to people that you are well you find something you like you do it a bunch. You try something new one time, you go, I like this. That's it for that. Right. Yeah, that wouldn't make sense, Hayes.
Starting point is 00:19:50 No. But I like John's idea of doing it so many times that people have to deal with it. And so, you know, since you have that kind of interest and there's probably other people who like those things, maybe you have a podcast about that and you host it and me and Hayes are the guests. Sure. I mean, my concept of a podcast like that would just be a bunch of sort of grunting sounds and squishing noises and, you know, just subtle little like.
Starting point is 00:20:26 squishing noises and, you know, just subtle little like... How is that so loud? Huh? How do you make that noise so incredibly loudly? Wow. Wow. And then I guess You'd have guests Who could then flee
Starting point is 00:20:49 Or participate I mean you guys have heard my views on bestiality right? Brett's heard them I was there You were there? I was there I proffered them I'm the engineer
Starting point is 00:21:04 What are some of your views well it's purely a sort of a you know rational view where i feel like people have an automatic like oh no response to bestiality yeah and there's a lot of rhetoric out there about how it's you know animal abuse and some like, oh no response to bestiality. Yeah. And there's a lot of rhetoric out there about how it's, you know, animal abuse. And some of it is, certainly. I mean, you can't have a human having sex with a small chicken or a fish or something without acknowledging that that's abusing the animal.
Starting point is 00:21:40 A small chicken. Right. A large hen. I don't know that you'd have a problem. I mean, have you seen the thickness of an egg that they lay? Yeah. No, I was just wondering why you took such pains to specify, and now I understand.
Starting point is 00:22:01 Yeah. A regular-sized fish? A regular... Yeah, I mean, something like, you know, maybe a catfish. Fish don't lay big eggs like that. Yeah, fish lay many, many small eggs. Little teeny... Caviar.
Starting point is 00:22:18 He's acting like he understands, but I don't think he does. Yes. He's got that look again. They ex... But anyway... It's't think he does. Yes. He's got that look again. They ex... But anyway... It's because of the water. Yeah. So you think a big chicken, it's okay to do that, do sex with it. I think
Starting point is 00:22:33 my stance on bestiality is very simple and elegant. It's not abuse in every case. That's it. And what's the name of this show? Yes, this could be a show. This show would be called Muddy and Me.
Starting point is 00:22:55 Okay, great. About a charming little mutt. Oh, Muddy. Oh, you thought it was muddy? Yeah. That could work, but I don't see how it plays into the i thought that was yeah i thought it was um like a brown hen a brown hen named muddy yeah like a mud hens yeah like a mud i didn't mean for for for this to become all like hen focus poultry related yeah yes
Starting point is 00:23:21 because that's not well you could have fooled me you brought it up right away and then you doubled down on it immediately after if you didn't mean for that you have a really strange way of not making it about that and this is just a pilot episode too we have yeah all kinds of time you'll be evaluating the whole kingdom yes and that's the kind of thing you might see at Wolf Cool Fest is like tune in for Muddy and Me. That's not going to be at Podfest. No, no.
Starting point is 00:23:51 No way. We would want to do one about movies. Oh, we have to. Oh, have you guys seen movies? I almost like disliking them as much as I like liking them. What do you think of that, John? Discussing discussions about movies?
Starting point is 00:24:09 I think it's valid. I wonder if we could do Doug Loves Movies. Yeah, instead of Doug, it's like Muddy or one of us. Well, Muddy can't talk. Muddy's got a ball gag in his mouth.
Starting point is 00:24:26 But the... Well, Muddy can't talk. Muddy's got a ball gag in his mouth. But do you think he loves movies? Muddy loves movies. Ooh. Muddy loves movies. Is there a game? Have you been on that show? I was on one of his... I don't... I can't remember what it was called. No, I think I know on one of his, I don't, I can't remember.
Starting point is 00:24:46 No, I think I know which one it was. I mean, just judging from your hazy memory, it was probably getting dug with high. Yeah. That's a big problem with that show because. Nobody knows if they did it. People ask, yeah, did you do that show? And they're like, I can't remember, man. No, now that I remember, I've never been on any one of Doug Benson's shows.
Starting point is 00:25:06 Is weed funny? Can we do a show about weed? Yeah. Just talking about it, would that be funny? Potentially. You know, it's all in the specifics of the content. Yeah. You know, no premise in general is necessarily going to be funny.
Starting point is 00:25:22 Oh, I disagree. Yeah, I disagree with that as well. Yeah, it's two against one there. You know he's talking about weed, right? Mm-hmm. Imagine a big bong rip. I mean, is that far enough away? Could it be like other drugs, like bath salts or...
Starting point is 00:25:42 Okay. Muddy loves bath salts or... Muddy loves bath salts or... Muddy loves bath salts. What might that sound like? Are you trying to transition into something? When you say the phrase, what might that sound like? Uh-huh. Is that what you're saying?
Starting point is 00:25:59 Am I supposed to be cued to start doing something? You're in an episode of Muddy Loves Bath Salts now, and I don't think that's a good way for it to begin is you asking what you're supposed to do like but that's why we're doing this trial run at pod fest before so i'm now trapped in a reality bubble where i'm in a new reality where i'm doing a podcast called muddy loves bath salts yes and you guys are telling me that I'm doing it wrong because from inside the bubble of this reality, I'm questioning the rules of this reality.
Starting point is 00:26:31 Right. And to us, because we're in it too, we don't know about this universe out here. And so there is no bubble talk. So when you say something like that, I'm like, the bubble, what are you talking about? This is just my normal world. Right. And so that was Muddy Loves Bath Salts. And that's another show that we could do.
Starting point is 00:26:49 Is that something you could engineer, Brett? Brett, would you be able to even handle engineering something like that? Or do we need to bring in a pro? If there are mics and everything set up, I can come in and engineer it. Well, you just saw an episode. Yeah, who's going to set the mics up?
Starting point is 00:27:06 Well, that's what I do at Earwolf i come and there's mics so then why was you engineering this you needed them to already be set up there's a massive hole in your story which is you said the only thing you would need is to have mics set up and then you said that's the only thing that you do i never i don't like to pile on to these type of things but i've done many podcasts over the years and from what i can gather the job of the engineer is to just put put the microphones out on the table and then just press the space bar and start it recording and then when it's over i think you just press the space bar and start it recording. And then when it's over, I think you just press the space bar again. Do you not even do the space bar? It's command space bar.
Starting point is 00:27:54 It really is. Okay. You guys don't know what you're talking about. What does space bar do? Well, space bar stops it. So you just try. You're supposed to be starting it! Well, if you press...
Starting point is 00:28:10 Half of the game is not pressing spacebar once it starts. So it's easier to stop it than it is to start. So you have to press command spacebar to start it, but then if you just brush the spacebar, you could accidentally stop recording. Exactly. You gotta reconfigure the
Starting point is 00:28:25 hotkeys. Guys, I think we found another Wolf Cool Fest show. Yeah. Engineer my engineering. You know, and it's Brett, somebody like Brett, getting advice on how to engineer from a couple of pros who've never done it, but who seem to know more about it
Starting point is 00:28:41 than he does. Yes. Brett, would you be able to listen to something like that? Yeah, I'll be there. And at the heart of a podcast like that, I think, would be the nature of arrogance. The nature of, like, you're the engineer, so you think you know. You're sort of calcified in what you think that you know everything. But then it takes, you know, the simplicity of people who don't know what they're doing, you know, like children, to open up the eyes of the...
Starting point is 00:29:12 Oh, maybe a baby teaches Brett how to engineer. Yeah. That's a good idea, John. That's a neat idea. Yeah. You feel that people take a lot of things for granted, huh, John? I do. Like, they just assume, okay, having sex with animals is bad.
Starting point is 00:29:25 And you're like, wait, have we even looked at this? Yeah. And they just assume, oh, I'm an engineer, so I know how to engineer. But it's like, wait, have you asked a baby
Starting point is 00:29:32 what he would do? Yeah. I love that you're just like, always like trying to find a new angle. Well, to me, I think that's the nature of, you know, art and creativity is questioning, you know,
Starting point is 00:29:42 our social norms. And yeah, exactly. What we take for granted. I do just want to clarify, this baby that's teaching Brett how to engineer, it's a baby human, right? Because if you're going to be there, I don't want it to be an episode of Muddy and Me. I don't.
Starting point is 00:30:02 While we're doing engineering. I'm not going to muddy those waters. Yes, okay, good. No, I would think it would be a baby human. Did you hear that? Yeah, yeah. Okay. Ideally, it would be baby versions of us,
Starting point is 00:30:17 if that was possible somehow. Yes, I think we can manage that. Yes. Yeah, well, if we could make ourselves into babies i feel like we're opening up wolf cool fest to a whole other like yeah maybe a whole other weekend where it's all the baby podcasts that we're gonna make yes baby versions of adult podcasts yes um like who's a person oh okay um i can't think of any just one i can think of sets of two like the brothers the sklar brothers that's good yeah yes the babies with glasses are always very cute people really enjoy that yeah yeah so just to clarify the science in some way we're transforming ourselves into babies.
Starting point is 00:31:11 I think we would actually create baby versions of ourselves, because what you're saying is impossible. I see. No. But... I can't... No, I can't shrink myself down to be a baby, and also who would then take care of the baby. I thought we were just blue-skying at this point. Well, that was going to be my next question.
Starting point is 00:31:21 Would the baby us's simply have the abilities and knowledge of babies, or do they retain some sort of adult abilities? For instance, how do they get to the hotel? Right. Well, we could just make them here. Yeah, I don't know why we would have to go all the way somewhere else. We just do the baby version of ourselves here, so we don't have to just be going back and forth.
Starting point is 00:31:48 Yeah. Between here and the laboratory. Yeah, the science room. And we'll just make a science room here. But yeah, I don't want to be made into a baby because I like being me and I, for the first time, maybe really love myself.
Starting point is 00:32:04 Although I've often thought if I got to do high school again, I would crush it, and I, for the first time, maybe really love myself. Although I've often thought if I got to do high school again, I would crush it. Oh, gosh, yes. If I knew then what I know now, I would just absolutely be tearing up babies. Because I wouldn't give a shit. But if you were a baby...
Starting point is 00:32:16 And I would talk to the kids. Excuse me, John. I would talk to the kids. I would talk to the kids who just stand in the corner reading books. Those are the kids I wish I talked to in high school. What I thought was cool wasn't necessarily what was cool. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:32:31 Yeah, that was annoying about high school. You couldn't find a corner that didn't have a standing kid with a book in it. Yeah. Sometimes you'd want to go lean in a corner, and it was just filled with a kid reading a book. You get very tired. You have to lean against the kid. Their interior lives must have been so interesting,
Starting point is 00:32:45 those book guys. Yeah. In fact, I was one of them. Yeah, I was one of them, too. I would have talked to someone who was myself. But the problem would be, obviously, I mean, do you guys, are your parents here? Yes.
Starting point is 00:33:01 Yeah. Is that what you were going to ask? Like, do they live, where do they live if they're still alive? Oh, what are you getting at? Well, like, if you turn back into a baby right now, I don't think you'd make it to high school. I'd have to kill my parents? No, but there'd be nobody to raise you. John, I don't know if I want to do that.
Starting point is 00:33:17 I'm not saying you have to kill your parents. Well, what I'm saying is I'd like to be friends with baby me. Yeah. So why don't we just make it out of something else? And then maybe I could help him through high school, too. Help him crush it. Oh, yeah, he would absolutely crush. Just pulverize the whole school.
Starting point is 00:33:37 So you would raise a baby version of yourself to take revenge on my old high school. Beat up the school, yes. It sounded like you were asking a critical question related to Sean's living situation earlier. And my parents, yeah. Was I reading into that wrong? I was just thinking if, I mean, we're talking about two different things, obviously.
Starting point is 00:33:58 We're talking about making a baby version of ourselves separate from ourselves, and then we're talking about my original idea, which I still like, which is us turning into babies ourselves. And no one said you can't do that. I know this is way off topic from what you guys wanted to talk about, but...
Starting point is 00:34:13 I don't think so. If you became a baby version of yourself, who would raise you? Would you survive till high school, or would you just die in a gutter on Beverly? Sean lives with his dad. Yeah, well, okay. So not the most elegant transition,
Starting point is 00:34:34 but I live with my dad in a sweet ass basement condominium, not even really apartment. And he's not even all that strict all the time. And it has its own door, which means it's a house. It's got its own entrance, so I really have my own place essentially, and I don't have a TV.
Starting point is 00:34:54 It's not a door, it's a hutch. Yeah, but I don't have a TV. Is that interesting to you, John? That you don't have a TV? I don't know. Do you have Netflix and stuff? Well, sometimes I use my cousin Sam's computer. Your cousin's Samsung computer?
Starting point is 00:35:10 No, no. I have a Samsung tablet. But my little cousin Sam has a computer. On the tablet? It won't operate Flash. It says I need to download Silverlight. Silverlight's a Flash-based.
Starting point is 00:35:31 John, I'd have to get my cousin Sam here to answer this. But anyway. What other podcasts do people enjoy? Oh, yes. Does anyone here have a podcast they saw this weekend they really liked? No one. Speaks volumes. Oh, wow. Wolf Cool Fest is going to destroy this
Starting point is 00:35:53 thing. And we get all the money. Hey, people sometimes do podcasts about how to manage your money, like Seth Godin. Maybe instead of Seth Godin, it's Seth Gemberling and Hayes Godin. Seth Gemberling, yeah. You did Seth Godin's startup school, right?
Starting point is 00:36:14 Yes, I did. Okay. What might that sound like? The school or the podcast? He said what? We're in it now. We're in the world now. He said what might that sound like.
Starting point is 00:36:24 Okay, sorry, sorry. Weird way to start a podcast, I guess, by saying the school or the podcast. Well, no, I guess that's our new signature intro. The school or the podcast. That's how we start every episode of Seth Gemberling and Hayes... Yeah.
Starting point is 00:36:43 Gordron. My name's Hayes Davenport. Gordron? My name's Hayes Davenport. No, you're the... What's your last name? Godin. Oh, I'll take... Oh, that's good. You'll take his first name
Starting point is 00:36:53 and I'll take his last name. That's good. That's what he already said. So I'll be Hayes Godin. That's good. I don't listen to other people when I'm trying to think of something to say that's good myself.
Starting point is 00:37:03 I can't tell what... Which... I can't tell which reality you're existing in. What? Which reality? There's only this one. I know, I know. Just the one, yeah.
Starting point is 00:37:11 Yeah, yeah, yeah. There's just this reality. And you were on the show. Sorry. Anyway. How do I start up my business, Seth? Well, you're going to want to decide if you want a sub-S corporation or a C-corp. You're talking about a flow-through.
Starting point is 00:37:27 We send candy in the mail. Well, I guess it's all how you want to structure your earnings. The candy goes bad. The mail is hot. Yes. This is what they don't tell you at the post office. That mail is very hot. And I don't know if it's a hot truck or if it's just
Starting point is 00:37:51 the guy's hands. Well, that's less of a money issue. It's just a pile of candy with stamps on it. There's a stamp on the candy. Yeah. You have to take the the candy. Yeah. You have to take the wrapping off.
Starting point is 00:38:07 Yeah. And then the stamp is directly on the chocolate. To save on the weight. You make a new wrapping made of stamps. Mm-hmm. And it's stamps.com stamps because they're a sponsor. So it's like a piece of computer paper printed out. They're a sponsor for the candy company?
Starting point is 00:38:25 Well, for this show. Yeah, for this show. For my money managing show. Yes. Okay, sorry guys. I was unaware of the sponsor for my own show. I apologize. It's cool, Seth. Don't beat yourself up.
Starting point is 00:38:42 Anyway, I guess I would, before I established a corporate entity, I would try to solve the shipping problem you're running into. Yeah. Which I don't know a lot about. Yeah. I'm a financial expert. Okay.
Starting point is 00:39:02 In this one reality. So I would say put the candy in a box maybe leave the wrappers on that's not gonna work for us yeah it we when we found it the wrappers were not there oh so this is this is just a one-time cash of found candy that you have yeah and once you sell it all through the mail or once it melts in the hands of a hot postman you will no longer have shut down the company enough that there's we have money for more we could hire we could hire a candy finder yeah well because i would i haven't been back to that tree since we found it, and for all I know, somebody's keeping more in there. Okay, well, this gets back into sort of a financial thing. You have to determine at what rate you find candy in the tree.
Starting point is 00:39:57 It's one big time. Yeah, one huge time, and I guess I have to prorate that over my 47 years on this planet. and I guess I have to prorate that over my 47 years on this planet. In this universe, Sean... Huh? Huh? What are you talking about? Okay, good. Sean is easing himself down a little bit for this. It just makes more sense if I'm just starting the candy business, you know?
Starting point is 00:40:20 That I'm 47 and could still see it through. So you would need to set a retail price for the candy, commensurate with the rate at which you come across free candy, and then you could determine how long your business would be solvent for. Yeah. Is that helpful? Kind of. What's your
Starting point is 00:40:48 favorite candy? It's called Sean's Candy Mailbox, which has turned out to be a mistake because it's supposed to be their mailbox that has the candy in it. Yeah. But right now it's all in Sean's mailbox. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:41:04 Which also we can't get into all the time. It's a P.O. box? Yeah. With a key? In a manner of speaking. It's in the main part of my dad's house that I'm not always allowed to go into because he says I'm too noisy stomping around so the storage place for the candy is the mailbox
Starting point is 00:41:33 uh right yeah because because we named the company Sean's candy mailbox it seemed like that's where the candy had to be contained. Truth in advertising. Yeah. And this is prior to covering the melting chocolate with... Some of them are partly covered. I think... I don't know how I... I don't know how I get out of this reality
Starting point is 00:42:03 or if I'm trapped in it forever. I know you guys can't help me because you're only aware of this reality, but at this point, I do feel like I'm trapped in this sub-reality. You're done with it, huh? Like you seem pretty done with it. I just don't...
Starting point is 00:42:25 I feel like I've given you the best. Plenty, yeah, yeah. It's been hard work, you know. I don't know if we go to other callers on this show. Are you guys calling in? Someone did call me a little earlier. Oh, yes. Let's see.
Starting point is 00:42:41 It was Dad. Oh, Dad. My dad calls Hayes. You both call Sean's dad Dad. Dad. dad. Oh, dad. My dad calls Hayes. You both call Sean's dad dad. Dad. Yeah. He would prefer if Hayes was his son. And not you.
Starting point is 00:42:55 Yeah. But he doesn't have anything else to call him. No. Doesn't know his real name. At his request. He's afraid I'll try to use his credit card or something. Do you know his name? His dad's real name?
Starting point is 00:43:13 Yeah. Sadly, it's Sean. Which gives you some idea of the intentions that he had for his son. You guys both run this candy company? So that was Seth Gemberling's startup school. Yeah. And that one felt good in that reality. It did get hot.
Starting point is 00:43:34 Wolf Cool Fest, I feel like, is taking off. Yeah, it did get hot. Can I just click? You guys both ran that candy company? Yes, I was a host on the show. You were co-host and you ran that company. And I ran the company, yeah. Sean's candy melt. Yes.
Starting point is 00:43:46 And I ran it, but I was more on the creative side of things. This isn't sweat, by the way. This is saliva. So, I'm not sure. Someone was slurping on Hayes' titties earlier today. To get ready for the show, I have my significant other, sort of,
Starting point is 00:44:02 Carrie Ann Moss, just sort of at Carrie Ann and Moss. Trinity. Just sort of at the ready, backstage, to sort of get me all... Relaxed. Yeah. Through the shirt. Yes.
Starting point is 00:44:15 Yes. It seeps through the shirt, yes. And that's what you're... So nobody saw any podcast they like this whole weekend. What? Indoor Kids. Indoor Kids. weekend. What? Indoor Kids. Indoor Kids. Oh, cool.
Starting point is 00:44:27 Indoor Kids. So we don't know what that one is. We have not seen any of these or done whatever you do with them. Haven't watched it or read about it. Had it been it? Yeah. We don't do that. But I've seen the thumbnail on iTunes.
Starting point is 00:44:43 Yes. And I think I have a good idea of what it is. It's a video games. It's a video games. Yes. It's a video game. And so imagine if instead of whatever the indoor kids is doing, instead it's the indoor us. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:45:02 And it's Hayes and Sean and Seth Gemberling. I've retained my sub-reality identity. Is that correct? Was that not working for everybody? And you're a financial expert. Okay.
Starting point is 00:45:18 Okay. So how might you look at the video games that we're designing from your financial expert perspective? You're designing them or you're playing them? Or we're just playing them or we're even just hanging out near them and talking about what kind of sodas we like.
Starting point is 00:45:36 I have a creeping sense that we're in the new reality now. No, he hasn't said what might that sound like. Oh, that's right, that's right. And Hayes just said it, and so... And here we are on Indoor Us, and welcome back. We're with Seth Gemberling. And how many video games would you say is enough?
Starting point is 00:45:58 At long last. How many is enough? Well, as long as the market will bear from a financial standpoint. As long as people are willing to play them and interested in playing new ones, as long as the technology continues to improve, I think there'll be a market for it.
Starting point is 00:46:20 So the industry could survive indefinitely. And are they causing all these shootings? The police shootings? Any of them. Take your pick. There's certainly enough. I don't know. No, I don't think they're causing them.
Starting point is 00:46:42 I think they certainly could serve to exacerbate somebody already in a fragile mental state, somebody already considering. Ooh, I disagree. Nobody take away my video games. Ooh, I mean, it's more important that I get stoned and play this than that people don't get shot. I don't even want to listen to it.
Starting point is 00:47:04 And now you tell me how I'm wrong. Well, no, I don't think they should be, I don't think video games should be banned or censored. I think they, you know. Oh, good. Your guy's a policeman as well. So keep that in mind. Okay. Seth, from my time on the force.
Starting point is 00:47:31 Sergeant Seth. I only made it to sergeant. Okay. When I was a cop on the beat, I certainly saw plenty of kids. Yeah. You know. And you're Indian because it's like Kumail
Starting point is 00:47:48 and so you have to be doing like. Excuse me? You know, like Kumail hosts the other show because when he came on our show. The indoor guy's is Kumail. Yeah. The indoor guy's is Kumail. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:47:59 The indoor guy's is Kumail. Yeah, the one she likes. Yeah, it's Kumail. And so your guy is policeman. But it would help if he's kind of Kumail. Yeah, the one she likes. Yeah, it's Kumail. And so your guy is policeman. But it would help if he's kind of Kumail. Yes, kind of Kumail. I don't know. I mean, I... Whoa!
Starting point is 00:48:14 Whoa! What was that? My family is from Pakistan, not India, actually. I was born in America. family is from Pakistan. Not India, actually. I was born in
Starting point is 00:48:27 America. I'm just telling you about my background. I'm a first generation American Pakistani former police officer financial expert. It always drives my mom and dad crazy that I don't have an accent.
Starting point is 00:48:47 And talk about comic books. Yeah, talk, yes. Talk about the comic books. About the best one. Just, yeah, which would Spider-Man win? What? Would he be able to beat everyone else? Isn't that the kind of thought experiments that makes podcasts great?
Starting point is 00:49:09 Honestly, I didn't have time to read a lot of comic books on the force. Never even on a stakeout? I know. I was just a sergeant, remember. I'm not a detective. I didn't go on any stakeouts.
Starting point is 00:49:22 You started at sergeant? What? You started at that rank? No. I just never made it to detective. Who's the champion, Spider-Man? I guess in a competition of
Starting point is 00:49:47 or the beast the monster one yeah well they both have incredible agility, strength. Spider-Man can fire homemade web fluid. Oh, that's right.
Starting point is 00:50:15 That's interesting. Ooh, yes. He would use that, I bet. Yeah. So he could probably tie Beast up, but Beast would break out of it, maybe. Maybe he snatches his glasses off his face with his... Because remember, Beast always wore glasses. The Beast.
Starting point is 00:50:35 Yes. I'm just going to drag us out of that reality. I don't think that show was working. You don't think it was the arguments didn't really make sense to me in these sub realities there's like it feels like there's like less air in there or something yeah then it's hard it's like hard to think yeah difficult like yeah well it's one year from now yeah it's one year from, and if you read the science books, there is going to be about three-quarters as much air as today air. There will be less water, but also we'll be drowning.
Starting point is 00:51:13 Yeah. I often think about that because I get a lot of packages from Amazon and stuff. Yeah. Live hens? All right. Come on. Come on, Hayes. He's a guest.
Starting point is 00:51:26 Sorry. No, I haven't signed up for the Amazon live hen subscription delivery service. Is that a thing? It's in its pilot phases. But I get a lot of, you know, they have the bubble wrap. They have the, like, you know, they used to have, like the little bubble wrap used to be little bubbles. Now bubble wrap is like long things of like a big air-filled bubble,
Starting point is 00:51:55 a bunch of them, right? Yeah, everybody knows what I'm talking about, right? Clap. Don't just clap. Clap if you know what I'm talking about. Okay. Don't be afraid to clap
Starting point is 00:52:06 when he sets up a major applause break like asking if you're familiar with bubble wrap so I always wonder cause some of it
Starting point is 00:52:15 cause I have kids and they play with it so sometimes the bubble wrap lies around my house for a few days and the air never seems to
Starting point is 00:52:23 they never seem to deflate really so i wonder how much of our air we're locking up in bubble wrap how much of our breathable air is sitting in a landfill locked in bubble wrap and who's got all the bubble wrap mr rich right on top of the hill yeah he's the one pumping it all up and while we're all uh sharing each other's breath basically word to the wise order a bunch of amazon packages get a emergency bucket with bubble wrap in it we start to run out of air you stick a straw in there and i think that's what John's saying. Well, I think what Hayes, you're saying that Mr. Rich. Mr. Rich, yes.
Starting point is 00:53:11 The richest man. Buying up all the bubble wrap. Yes. To put in packages. No, he's saving it so he can be the only one who can breathe. But John's just saying he has it in his house. He just said that, Hayes. Who said that?
Starting point is 00:53:31 John just said he has some in his house for days at a time. Well, he has a little in his house, yes, but you don't understand the amount that Mr. Rich has. Oh, it's huge. It's the size of this room. Yes, yes. The biggest thing there is, which would explain the percentage of fullness it has. of this room. Yes. Yes. The biggest thing there is. Oh.
Starting point is 00:53:46 Which would explain the percentage of fullness it has. Yes. Yes. We asked for the big room because of all the people. Okay. Brett, were you gonna...
Starting point is 00:53:57 Brett, what's up, man? What am I doing here? Okay. I mean, is this a... Well, it seems like this would be a good time for the Popcorn Gallery song. Yeah, do you have your guitar? Yeah, I do, actually. Okay.
Starting point is 00:54:12 Want me to plug it in? Oh, Jesus, it's not plugged in. Is an engineer capable of such a feat of engineering? Just watch me. I wanted everyone to see how I engineered that. And like a good engineer, he puts down the microphone before he finishes speaking. Oh, boy.
Starting point is 00:54:33 This is taking... Okay. All right. Thanks for the area. Brett just gave me permission to talk about bubble wrap on my show, so I guess that's what I'll do. Were we talking about a podcast idea? Brett just gave me permission to talk about bubble wrap on my show. So I guess that's what I'll do. Were we talking about a podcast idea?
Starting point is 00:54:49 Yeah, you wanted to do one about your kids. I did? Yeah, right? Well, what might that look like? Hey, everybody. Welcome to the KidCast. This is Seth Gemberling. I'm a kid version of Sean Clements.
Starting point is 00:55:14 And I'm a kid version of Thomas Middleditch. Well, kids, what do you guys hope to accomplish when you grow up? Silicon Valley. I think I was in a commercial once or something. Yeah, singular. Yeah, that'd be great. You'd like to do that again? Yeah, I'd like to do that again.
Starting point is 00:55:42 So, young Thomas, you're hoping that in the future there's another show silicon valley that you could star in i'll do yes i hope so and i'm hoping that singular becomes a company again so that i can do a commercial for it when i become an adult it It went away. AT&T bought it. Yeah. Singular's not around anymore? No. No. Oh, John. Oh, Seth. Seth, I hate for you to find out this way. Oh, no.
Starting point is 00:56:16 Sweetie. Seth, maybe do some of your cop stuff. Oh, wow. Opens with the guitar equivalent of a fart. What am I doing here? You just shattered the reality of the kid cast. Oh, right. Yeah, the kid cast.
Starting point is 00:56:37 Do the kid cast theme song. Mm-hmm. Put a mic in his face so he can sing. Okay, now do the real Kit Kat theme song. That's the... No. You're on the candy business. Thank you. Do the Popcorn Gallery one.
Starting point is 00:57:18 Okay. Popcorn. thank you brett so this is the part of the kid cast where uh where the two child versions of future celebrities get questions from the audience for the host, Seth Kemberling. But this time they're popcorn kernels, which are the babies of popcorn. You're going to... And now you say something. Yeah, do you get it?
Starting point is 00:58:05 I, uh, can you just say what you said again? Yes. Yeah. This is the part of KidCast where we get questions. Yeah, where the two child versions of future mega celebrities collect questions from the audience to ask you seth gemberling the host who also i believe is the daddy on the kid cast yes but the questions are popcorn are popcorn you'd expect questions for a normal adult to be exploded popcorn the big kind yes but in this
Starting point is 00:58:43 version it's babies. It's kids. And popcorn kernels are regular popcorn's babies. Seth, when you're eating popcorn, you're not eating the kernels. They pop those open. I just don't understand why in the kid cast how a popcorn analogy thematically works. Because of movies. Yeah, the kids love the movies. KidCast is related to movies? Yes. Thomas Middleditch
Starting point is 00:59:12 is in it. He was in that Road to Nardo movie. That never came out. Well, wait and see. Hang on. Let's reach into the bag and get, oh, somebody's crouched. Reaching into the bag and get, oh, somebody's crouched. Reaching into the bag is asking the audience to ask a question. It's getting a question out of the bag.
Starting point is 00:59:31 You reach into the bag to pull out the kernel. Yeah. So you kids, I know this is my podcast too, but you kids are asking the audience to ask you a question that you then ask me, the daddy. Yes, you're the daddy. And the audience, the potential audience full of questions is a bag. Yes. And the questions are kernels of popcorn.
Starting point is 00:59:59 Yeah. Because the kernel is small like a child. The baby. Of the popcorn. People heat up the kernels to pop them. That's what you eat. When you eat it. At the movies.
Starting point is 01:00:17 We reach into the bag. That's good. It sounds smoother than normal. Yes. Sounds very smooth. Shp, shp, shp, shp, shp, shp. Shp smoother than normal. Yes. Sounds very smooth. Ooh, the little baby popcorn kernel. That's what it's at. So, who's got a question that is the little baby popcorn kernel for the daddy?
Starting point is 01:00:42 For daddy. Anyone have a question for Seth Gemberling about being a daddy? baby popcorn kernel for the daddy. Anyone have a question for Seth Gemberling about being a daddy? Or policeman? A question that hopefully clarifies movies. Yes. Oh yes, I see.
Starting point is 01:00:56 So big stars like you can do these podcasts just as a fun win. But how does the beginner podcaster, can you talk about branding and monetizing and getting your word out there? Okay, so this one's confusing, Daddy. So big podcast stars like us
Starting point is 01:01:18 can do the podcast just as a whim. But for people who aren't like that, can you tell us about branding? Well, sure. I mean, as a father and a former police officer and a financial expert, you want to upload it, first of all, right? Yeah. Yeah.
Starting point is 01:01:46 That's after you record it. No, you need the content. The content needs to be interesting and then you need to record it. He feels like he has some ground to make up in terms of establishing his engineer bona fides I think.
Starting point is 01:02:01 Again, you got it backwards. You said content and then record. You said content and then record. You press record and then the content. Then you press space. You stop the content and then you upload it. You just upload it raw. You don't adjust the audio at all or trim the top and the bottom. What are you a baby of in this, Brett?
Starting point is 01:02:23 Yeah, what baby version are you? What baby version? Yeah. Well, for instance, he's a baby version of Thomas Middleditch. He's a baby version of Sean Clements. I see. Why did you say you want to be a baby version
Starting point is 01:02:39 of your own girlfriend? Yeah, that was strange. He doesn't talk into the mic, so... That's crazy to me. Yeah, that's actually creepy. Why did you talk into the mic so that's crazy yeah that's actually why did you cover up the mic to say that you would that you desire to be and why did you say desire oh yeah a baby version of your own girlfriend yeah baby version of your own girlfriend who is very nice by the way yes if you're a baby version of your own girlfriend, does that mean you're then like, it's like a lesbian incest statutory rape scenario?
Starting point is 01:03:09 Wow, this feels like it would be more at home on Muddy Loves John. Muddy and me! But it's a very fair question. I suppose you have a point, but again, I'm not the baby version yet, so none of that has happened yet. But in the show you are. Yeah. Once I become the baby version, I suppose. He wants to retain his engineer self long enough to refute everybody else, and then he'll transmogrify into the baby version of his own girlfriend.
Starting point is 01:03:49 Weird. Bone chilling stuff. The thoughts that go on in the mind of an engineer. Yeah, and why did you cover up the mic to say that this baby has fully developed breasts? So strange, Brett. The whole point of a baby is they don't deal with that stuff yet
Starting point is 01:04:07 That's the whole point of a baby That's how babies work Just wanted to transmogrify Correctly Okay Oh, I'm not even going to say what he just covered up the mic and said. No, I think people should hear. You really want people to hear that?
Starting point is 01:04:31 Yeah. Don't say it. Anyway, after you start uploading podcasts, maybe you make like a Facebook fan page or something. You just want to get the word out there. And we did a lot of performances on the train. You performed podcasts. Yeah.
Starting point is 01:04:53 Go in the train car. Hi, we're the podcast. A subway, like an LA subway train? No, no, like a coastal rail. The one that goes up to Vancouver, because it's longer. The thing, the mistake of the subway is after you promote your thing, they can just get out. But on the long train, they have to stay on the train. Really get to engage them.
Starting point is 01:05:20 Yeah, for days. So you just, you don't even need to switch cars. You just pick one car. Yeah, for days. So you just, you don't even need to switch cars. You just pick one car. Yeah. Have you heard of Mumford & Sons? I have. Do you think they rock? Our podfest has
Starting point is 01:05:38 music too. Yeah. Mumford & Sons rocks for the length of one song the first time you hear it. It's Mumford & Sons rocks for the length of one song the first time you hear it. It's Mumford & Sons rock. I'm sorry? Mumford rocks. Mumford & Sons rock.
Starting point is 01:05:54 It's just like, just an understanding of when to use plurals and stuff. Mumford & Sons is a band. Are some bands. Anyway, so they rock. How? How, how,
Starting point is 01:06:17 how, how good? Well, as a daddy, yes, I'm unfortunately not so up on the current music. That's good. That happens to dads. Yeah.
Starting point is 01:06:33 You lose touch. I mean, ask me about James Taylor or Mamas and the Papas. Well, I don't want to do those ones because you said them already, so I feel like you've got a canned answer. But maybe I could think of something in that neighborhood, you know, that would be surprising, but that you would have
Starting point is 01:06:52 a strong opinion on. Not Mumford & Sons and not James Taylor, but, oh, Steely Dan. They're good. Okay, now we're cooking. What's that thing Brett said? Oh yeah, what did Brett said?
Starting point is 01:07:14 No, but you were going to say. Oh, it was about because it was about being a baby version of his own girlfriend. Yes, with fully developed breasts. I won't say exactly what he said about the part, but the part was her nene-no, and he did mention it, and he did have some details that he wanted to be sure they were the same.
Starting point is 01:07:44 And I just don't think that's nice to talk about. Out of respect for his girlfriend, who's very nice. Who's one of the nicest people I've met. Yeah. And out of respect for him, who I don't want to have to go to jail. Because frankly, hearing this made me think that I should have Seth Gemberling, former police officer, call some of his buddies from the force and get this guy locked up.
Starting point is 01:08:07 He defended bestiality, and you're telling him to get... He just said, let's think about it, which I think is always fair. Yeah. You covered up the mic and said, we gotta do this right now. So... My worry is that as soon as we start pursuing
Starting point is 01:08:24 legal action, he would just transform into his baby self. I'm immune at that point. He would have to be tried as a minor. As a baby. Anyway, I hope that answered your question. So that cleared up branding. I guess we'll take one more question from the popcorn
Starting point is 01:08:46 gallery. On the kid cast. Oh no, I'm the brother of the little baby colonel from before. And I was bully.
Starting point is 01:09:01 Okay, so I picked up two colonels by accident. One was the brother of the baby colonel from before And one was their school bully Somebody's bullying a baby And I think I have an idea Who it might be, Engineer Brett So now remember The colonels
Starting point is 01:09:17 Which are the questions from the audience Are themselves sentient Yes With personality. That's what we found, yeah. So who is going to be the question? Thank you. I recently got a job in the industry
Starting point is 01:09:35 making movie, and I did not realize getting into this position that movie is made on computer now. Okay, so... It was people in camera. Okay, and then do you want to shape that like a question?
Starting point is 01:09:54 Do you know about making movies on computer rather than people in camera? Okay, so this guy's bragging. He's trying to show off, and he kind of looks like Ponce de camera. Okay, so this guy's bragging, he's trying to show off, and he kind of looks like Ponce de Leon. Could be.
Starting point is 01:10:13 Could be Ponce if he found that font of you. If he is Ponce, then it would add up. So he wants everybody to know he's got a job in movies, and he thinks that's going to impress us. In fact, we really do are able to do that up here ourselves. It does make sense that in a show where so many of us have suddenly become babies of ourselves, that Ponce de Leon would be here. Yes. The original become a baby guy.
Starting point is 01:10:39 Yes. Now... Yes, because I've noticed... The first. Numero uno. Yes. That there is water on this table that he's been looking at
Starting point is 01:10:51 in sort of an unusual way as if he put it there to be drank and have babies turned into. You're saying that Ponce de Leon suspects that all water may be from the Fountain of Youth. Or he filled these bottles... I mean, yeah,
Starting point is 01:11:02 he could have done a lot of stuff. Yeah. Ponce de Leon works at... The So Leon works at a Perrier bottling plant. Yeah, or I think he may have just carried some ton of youth water in here in his mouth and deposited it into our bottles. Spit it in there. Yeah. Oh, and that's how you became the baby Thomas Middleditch.
Starting point is 01:11:24 Yeah. Oh, and that's how you became the baby Thomas Middleditch. So what he wants to know from you, Daddy, is do you know about how movies are on computers? Yeah, I mean, I know that some movies are made on computers. I know they still use people to voice them a lot of the time. Computers? They use people to voice computers a lot of the time. Computers? They use people to voice computers? Let me clarify.
Starting point is 01:11:54 People voice the characters in the movie that have been rendered on computers. So you're talking about the guy who voiced the brave little toaster. You thought that toaster was a computer. The brave a computer. The Brave Little Computer. I didn't think that I was confused. Because it was square? Computers.
Starting point is 01:12:30 And I just hate it when I'm listening to a live podcast there's a big laugh and i don't know what are they laughing at yeah and john just did a funny face i i i i honestly don't know what i'm confused about anymore i feel like i've been doing KidCast for so long now that I... Yeah, time does move slower in the KidCast universe. Yeah. So that was KidCast. So thanks, everyone, for coming out. Yes, Brett, you're supposed to be playing the goodbye song. Brett, and play the goodbye song, and you know how that one goes.
Starting point is 01:13:05 Is this the end of this actual show? I think so. So the majority of this show was kid cast? Well, we don't know about kid cast in this world. You don't? No. It just passed by instantaneously. There was a seamless break between, well, let's see what that sounded like, and that was kid cast.
Starting point is 01:13:22 I thought in the overreality you were aware of the sub-reality. No idea. So please do pre-order your tickets to Wolf Cool Fest. Yes. There is a KidCast show there. We don't know about it. Yes. You'll also hear Muddy.
Starting point is 01:13:39 Muddy and me. Muddy and me. Seth Gemberling, Startup School. And probably six or seven other shows. Yes. Oh, the Outdoor Us or Indoor Us. Yes.
Starting point is 01:13:52 And then, and also, be kind to each other. Don't be cynical. Remember Conan told us that? Bye. Bye. bye bye Hollywood Handbook is brought to you by Wolf Cool Productions
Starting point is 01:14:22 a subsidiary of Calvin and Hobbes. Ow, baby. That was a HeadGum Podcast.

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