Hollywood Handbook - Ronna Glickman and Bryan Safi, Our Advice Show Friends
Episode Date: April 13, 2021RONNA GLICKMAN and BRYAN SAFI from the podcast Ask Ronna help The Boys create characters for their new advice show. Subscribe on Patreon and watch the full video recording here. See Privacy P...olicy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.
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this is a head gum podcast
so i get my phone rings i'm like just falling asleep i'm like almost asleep
worst timing when you're in that twilight where anything could happen and when we're all where
your dreams are just when the dream lord is like you could go anywhere
starting to tiptoe into well he's mixing his ingredients isn't he a sprinkle of your childhood
self and just a dash of your romantic interest and just a bit of your wildest fantasies and a
and a and a pinch of your most nefarious fears and all these elements
and they're becoming this delicious
brew cocktail of
dream world yes
and the
answer the phone and it's the guy
it's the jumble guy it's the guy that
does the jumble in the paper
he's like no
I want to say art
yes art class is it al is it al his name is art class and he
uh is like hey the jumbles do in like one second it has no it's for the morning it's like already
like 2 a.m and he's like, I have all the words.
I can't figure out how to jumble them up in a good way.
He can't do the jumblified version.
Does he have the comic done?
Comic's done.
It has all the words ready to go.
And he knows what letters he needs to go into the circles.
They're already circled.
He's just really having trouble jumbling them up in a way that's like good and this is like i'm really so give me a word i am
really really good at this so give me any word and i'll i'll jumble it up and uh in a great way
uh panopticon kind of pippa tt
and so like that
that's the perfect construction
to like make it a really enjoyable
experience to get to
panopticon kind of pippity
give me it's interesting I'm the opposite
you want to give me a jumbled word
and I'll tell you what it is okay
um
vever nam
pass you want to pass that one okay it was vietnam that was what the word was there were ours in it
in your version there were ours and it's in the sorry yeah sorry it's in the
i was in in that's how vietnam is spelled in vietnamese there's there's two r's
kevin give me a word cheesy excuse me yes what did you say cheesy why are you saying it like that
that's not how you guys say it just the way you're saying it is so weird
anyway fucked up cg welcome to hollywood handbook and insider and insider's guide
to dropping names in the right carpet line big what up what up to all the listeners we have two great guests here from another great show and
what is it about these other shows coming on your show that gets these ideas oh my god popping and
crackling and it's a little like they're the sort of waking dream lords, right? Where they come in and they sprinkle their ingredients on your mind and it gets you churning and turning and you go,
okay, I like what they're doing with their show and I don't really like my own show.
And is this giving me now, do I now want to do their show and not my show?
You know, it's these feelings that wake up inside you.
And so first, let's just say what
up what up and welcome uh brian rana you're here and brian is friends with the show he has been on
the show yes many times naibar fisa interesting i like it thank you yeah and you jumbled him and rana is new has never and rana
we have been on this circling each other for so many years ron is a hot ticket for so long
nonar you remember nonar garcia par? Nonar Garcia Parra. Very thin.
This red sock.
And I believe a minority or majority owner of the Los Angeles Football Club now.
And so you've really been following Kip since he... Well, it's funny you should mention it because Noma, as we call him in Boston, lived in Marblehead, Massachusetts, which is where I'm from.
He lived there for a brief amount of time.
I do see pictures of him.
Where you're from and where you remain.
Where I'm from, where I remain, exactly.
Where I lay my hat, I suppose.
I don't wear hats that often.
You see pictures of Nomar?
If you did, you'd know you hang the hat.
You don't lay it.
It's true.
It's bad luck to lay a hat, isn't it?
You want to hang it on something. You wouldn't just lay it down. It's so easy to sit on and then it's cooked, you'd know you hang the hat. You don't lay it. That's true. It's bad luck to lay a hat, isn't it? You want to hang it on something.
You wouldn't just lay it down.
It's so easy to sit on and then it's cooked, you know?
It's on a hat now.
And then it's one of those pancake hats.
Unless it's the type that you can just snap back.
Accordion.
Yes.
I have to say, though, it's the best setup for a great mime.
You know what I mean?
You sit on your hat and then you get to see them react
or a magician
and then you realize there's nothing there
all the entertainers I appreciate
yeah thank you
Brian where did you see a picture
of Nomar Garciaparra
he's all over
he's all over Marble Hat
the bank
where I obviously do all my accounting for Ascrana and everything.
And I usually have, I'm a private client.
So I do go.
Are you a Platinum Honors Rewards member?
Because you must be carrying a pretty hefty balance.
I think if you're, you know, combined accounts, but.
Yeah, I am platinum.
I do all the rewards programs.
My wallet is nothing but titanium.
Everything in it.
It's very heavy.
It drags me down.
So what percentage cash back
are we looking at on that card?
15 to 20%.
Oh my God.
Yeah.
Naibar.
If you fell off a boat,
and you live at the beach now,
so if you fell off a boat,
you would be at the bottom of the ocean
in like 15, 20 seconds.
It happened.
Yeah, Rana had to get someone out with a jet ski to come get me.
Yeah, carrying his own cement brick around with him.
Technically, I was spying on somebody so that titanium helped because I had my periscope thing, but yeah.
Okay, yeah, I could see how the titanium would be helpful in that yeah in that
situation uh marblehead so beautiful um i love a beach that is like four or five feet long
you mean from the from when you step onto the beach to when you hit the ocean. Yeah. Both. Yeah. Yeah.
And you must love it.
If you love Marblehead, you must love a cove.
I love like. Or an inlet.
Yes.
Encountering a jetty every like three or four steps that you have to.
A rocky jetty.
Yeah.
Scramble over.
A nice dive in the mud.
I love how huge the grains of sand are.
They're basically rocks.
Don't forget the seaweed
yes plenty of it
what's nice for me in Marblehead
is thinking my shoes
are gonna be okay but I get home
and I go no
I could these
shoes are now these go in the garbage
and you have to repaint your car
as soon as you get home you have to repaint
your car otherwise it'll rust through.
Fabulous place to live.
The best.
Great place to unwind.
Brian, you have moved, of course, to Marblehead to participate in this new podcast, in this new venture.
And let's talk about this let's well as rana mentioned to me really really rana's the reason i got so dedicated to my craft because she was the one who said it's not
going to be authentic if you're in los angeles over zoom i need you here even though she's in
the next room over yeah i need you here to zoom and i thought well maybe she said you're an actor
couldn't that help your character and i thought i've never thought of it that way. And Burbank to Boston on JetBlue
is not a big deal.
So I ended up going.
I'm all about authentic experiences.
And I think that the time
that Brian and I spend off the mic
is just as important
as when we're Zooming each other
from rooms adjacent on the mic.
Although that hasn't applied
for a while, Ronna,
because you won't even let me come near you
because I got the Sputnik.
That's true.
She doesn't trust it.
The Sputnik vaccine.
Yeah.
It's just, I mean.
Speaking of titanium,
there's a lot of that there too.
In Russia?
Fabulous.
Yeah, you should go now.
Right now?
Well, I mean, wait until this is over, then i would go yeah yeah yeah so we i mean like
we're looking at you two we're like god they're like doing they're doing it they're doing the
advice show like we've we've we've been looking at like new form we've got this patreon now we're
like we have how many shows kevin how many? We added a couple more this morning, right?
So there's now seven.
Wow.
Now we have seven shows.
Wow.
Wonderful.
That's a full week.
Yes.
And we're hoping to get to 19 by we're recording this on Friday.
So by like Saturday afternoon, we need to be at 19 shows.
Oh, wow.
For the Patreon.
Yes.
Which sounds like a lot.
I mean, it does.
How long is each show?
Five to seven minutes?
Well, we've been doing this one
already for ten minutes.
Oh, so okay.
So, you know, I gotta say
no. Can you believe that, by the way?
Can you believe how ten minutes?
It's blown.
Who's holding you to this standard?
Is this a self-imposed standard, getting to 19 episodes by Saturday?
The battery, like, it's the equipment.
The equipment that we are using needs to kind of be...
You know, if you, like, leave your washing machine unused for a really long time it starts to grow things on it
we have to be podcasting like basically all the time or like and ron is making a face like no i
didn't know that because i didn't because i used my washing machine yeah but we actually are so
into the environment laundry yeah yeah we just don't we don't use the washing machine 24 years
since i did a lot of laundry i mean i'll do a lot of towels you know at the beach i i i just want to
i didn't want to talk about i i do freeze my jeans uh you do not have to yes ever wash your jeans
yeah you wear french jeans do you yes i wear, I wear French. And Japanese denim. What's the label?
APC.
Are you wearing APC?
Yes.
Always. And what does that stand for?
Always probably closing.
It's true.
It's true.
And yes, French cold jeans, Japanese denim.
Yeah. That's a movie I'd see how those two meet that you do how did you two meet by the way it's a good question i was a big fan of rana's
for a very long time and i was going this is true i was going to budapest after um i don't want to
say it like that that's well that's how you say it. Well, hey, it's okay. That's fine. I just I had just gotten divorced.
My husband had just left me.
So do we want to go there?
Okay.
I know not at all.
I could go anywhere on this.
No, if it's something you need to talk about.
I mean, he's a terrific.
Rana really misses my ex, which it irritates the shit out of me.
But I wouldn't say I miss him.
I just think sometimes things don't work out.
And he's a he's a great guy. Nobody's in the wrong think sometimes things don't work out and he's a
he's a great guy nobody's in the wrong you were bad doesn't mean he's not right
no of course not the fit isn't right you could both actually still be back to jeans yeah no it
is and i i'm hearing all this jeans talk and i'm going uh geez am i the only one i haven't worn jeans uh since this whole pandemic thing i'm actually
i'm in sweats right now oh come on no i'm wearing sweats that no every day i wear sweat even when
you're in a meeting on a call yes and what i'll do is i'll put on a cute top
but it doesn't matter because waist down. Yeah. I'm so comfy.
I'm just in sweats.
Did you see that Rand Paul was wearing a pair of Daisy Dukes under his blazer
the other day?
Are you?
Rand was,
Oh,
that is so Rand.
The father did a show,
uh,
some sort of a live satellite spot.
And then he pushed away from the desk and he was wearing a pair of Daisy
Dukes.
The father,
but that's what I mean.
Ron is that, Oh, Ron, sorry. Is that that who the father is i can't keep those two straight regardless it's what i
and rand would want is just what's the purest expression you know it's not um it's not meeting
some societal standard it's actually what is the most efficient way to cover my butt and front and that is with with a minimal amount of tiny
pair of denim and so everything's covered and so you've done the job of the clothing and you don't
have all this excess just like fashion waste and that's what i do and my sweats are actually very
small wow skimpy sweats i'm in sweats right now and I'm in
the teen just the teensiest just the most barely there sweats do they say anything on the back of
them um yeah they say a few things actually oh wow I'd love to know and are they very thin
they're very sheer they're extreme oh They're very sheer. They're extreme.
Oh, they're feather light.
Yes.
They're they say Paul Shearer.
They're Paul Shearer shorts.
Shearer shorts.
He really could do all Shearer brand.
They say.
So they say Paul Shearer.
They say unspooled.
They say, how did this get made?
They say like Thursday night Twitch club.
They say they say crash test which yeah human giant
they say they say facebook or myspace they say yeah they say facebook show it was updated to
facebook rana what is it now is facebook still a thing people are looking at i can't remember
i don't know only parents i think they say respecto montalban
uh so they have a lot of dates all all of the dates that all this performance so just from
the beginning yeah wow it's going all the way back and they auto update huh that's that's a
that is i don't blame you for buying those that's that is the auto update's impressive and so okay it's not like
it kills yeah it's like a digital digital billboard it sounds like it right like a train
station like grand central it's not digital it uh there's a um there's like a needle a self-activated
mechanical needle that is inside the shorts yes oh that does sound i have to say initially you
did i think you were saying that it was comfortable and practical.
It really doesn't sound, it sounds very impractical, to be honest.
That aspect of it, yeah.
But then at the same time, I am the first to be notified as long as my app is up to date when Paul, and I have to plug my phone into my pants every now and then.
God.
So it comes with a docking station.
How much were these sweatpants?
Good question.
You know, I hate to put a price on a cherished possession like this.
Or maybe they're an NFT.
They sound like that.
The way it works is the sweatpants themselves are basically free.
It's the subscription cost.
Like everything these days. It's like toner yeah the sweatpants yeah were and i bet you got it by the year because it was cheaper versus by the month
i did because you wind up you wind up saving the monthly cost for by paying for the year
is only like 35 a month like it's like nothing right but versus like if you if you do it each month
you go well i'm not committed to this whole year i'm not outlaying this big chunk of cash but
it's 75 for the month but the pants were only were only like 99 bucks to start. And then, yeah. And then I paid for the year
or I think I got a two year.
Oh, cool.
So it was whatever that works out to.
It's like seven grand.
Okay, yeah.
But as long as I plug it in,
as long as I keep the docking station updated,
which I've been a bad boy about,
sometimes I've forgotten.
But I know when Paul's going live.
You know, I know if he tweets.
Do they vibrate or just the Telex needle starts going as soon as, yeah.
Like, you know, an old-fashioned.
You were speaking of Vietnam earlier.
Like during the Vietnam War when you would get a memo come through the machine
or something like that.
Oh, remember that?
Yeah.
Is it a dot matrix printer or is it? Do you remember getting a memo come through the machine or something like that remember that yeah is it a
dot matrix printer or is it getting a vietnam war memo yeah a telegram basically like there was so
remember you would get those memos you have to tear it out of the printer oh you never saw the
a movie that's entirely about photocopying it is and it's just totally photocopying it's those the edges right that
rip off with the holes in it the perforation yeah yes no that it is that dot matrix technology but
they've just kind of put it into and there's a pen you got to refill the ink a lot does it
tattoo your leg at the same time or do the pants only upload when you're not i wouldn't call that my leg yeah but but yeah i mean look it's ultimately it's a
needle and it's ink so you are you are getting you're getting tattooed but we were talking about
how you two met and that brian was on his way to budapest correct yeah and i'm not the asshole
who pronounced it that way for the record yeah i Yeah. I guess I don't think of being an asshole to pronounce it how they.
I took some heat for saying I was going to Budapest, and then all of a sudden, Hayes
came out with Budapest, which is correct.
Budapest.
Yeah.
I guess I think it's actually respectful to pronounce it the way that they.
You know what?
You're absolutely right.
I guess it's not a microaggression.
Right.
Which is what you were doing.
Okay, so I did go to Budapest.
I'll take it from the top so you weren't
you weren't just on your way you went you went all the way we went together we went together
we met there we met that's how you did not fly together rana was i think in italy and i said
i'm in budapest and i'm a huge fan of yours because i had seen her picture i was actually
in paris but yes apparently you saw her pictures you just go
around seeing pictures of people well i mean i was on instagram but i don't think it's that okay
so that's your that's how you say that you had so like when you say you saw nomar at his picture
at the bank you just mean while you were waiting in line to do your banking i i never told rana
this there was a picture of her next to george sor in Budapest, and there was an X through her face.
But I didn't end up telling Rana that when I saw it.
I survived it.
I survived it.
Yeah.
But so she came out to meet me there,
and we fell completely in love with each other,
and then sort of carried that on.
Oh, God.
Rana, I saw that.
Over the Danube.
Yeah.
We didn't do a cruise on the Danube,
but we did rent a boat
that took us up and down the Danube.
You just rented your own boat.
We did, actually.
It was sort of a disco boat
that we rented for an hour or two.
I had a sparkling wine on it.
You did, yeah.
Sparkling wine.
Well, they have wonderful wine in Hungary.
They do.
A little sweet for my taste,
but they're very
proud of it so you tell them you like it isn't that funny they should call it thirstery
that's so funny yeah hang on hang on hang on yeah i'm getting this now yeah yeah yeah i'm actually
no stop yeah honestly I took that and thought
I'm like so close
just let me get there
because it's actually
Hungary is the country in which
just let him get it
dude shut up for a second
I'm honestly so close
I'm going to really enjoy it
but I need you to stop
I'm stopped i'm done
yeah yeah and that one no but he's not quite there i just i could tell that
yeah this is about something else it's
oh we're so close. Yes.
Okay, good.
Yes.
That's great.
He's got it.
Yeah.
So anyway, I thought that would be funny.
Very cute.
Yeah.
Instead of turkey.
Oh.
Uh-oh.
That's fine.
That.
Just let me say that.
Uh-oh.
No, no, that's fine.
That's totally fine. Uh-oh.
Right.
Turkey.
That's actually really good.
Okay, good.
Yeah.
You know, we're in the region.
Yeah, he's thinking of Hungary
and food. That's actually
it could have been much worse.
I love it.
Are there any other food countries besides Turkey
and Hungary?
Chile.
Portsmouth. Chile.
There you go.
Double entendre food countries. I it i said it already yeah yeah yeah
brazil nut iceland i suppose if you're the kind of person likes to crunch well i feel like if you
could do brazil nut then you could just do like anything yeah well you could say italian sub
italian yeah to me it opens the door for italian sub i think that's okay yeah i think that's good too i think
that totally counts swiss miss yeah called canadian bacon so that's one yeah that's another
all of these count i think like i think brazil not is it was a totally good suggestion and i
think all of these are also totally fine i just find steak yeah yeah that's right yeah exactly
or it doesn't even have to be something
that's like connected to that
it could be like french peas or whatever
yeah or like
can you take my order for food please
yeah
see if that works for me
yeah exactly
all these are fine
hey hurry up with the eggs and bacon
I'm Russian here
yeah Russian dressing and that's perfect Hey, hey, hey, hurry up with the eggs and bacon. I'm rushing here. Yeah.
There you go.
That's dressing.
Of course.
And that's perfect.
That's really good.
Yeah.
So we're looking at YouTube and we're like, so we're just moving off the food countries.
I'm not saying we shouldn't, but it feels haze.
It feels to me like you're moving off of it.
Now, it was a very rich run.
We found all kinds of wrinkles so
we may be done exploring started it with with brazil nut and and you're now ending it is what
i'm gathering also just to support sean in this moment i also think it's really sort of like
unnecessary for you to say that you started it i Correct. You know, that was, I mean, I agree that it's unnecessary
because everyone knows,
like everyone was here,
everyone heard it.
Like, so I agree.
I don't even need to,
but Brian said thirstery.
Yeah, but then,
I said thirstery.
Hayes started the run
where it didn't have to work.
I said turkey.
That's true.
Yeah.
In fantasy, Hayes, yeah. He started the run where it didn't have to work. I said turkey. That's true. Yeah. In fantasy, Hayes.
Yeah.
He started the run
where it didn't have to be.
Hayes opened it up to be.
I opened it up to be
basically anything.
Yeah.
So much more inclusive.
Much.
Hayes.
Hayes.
Hayes are what
Hayes are what horse eats.
Yeah.
And we've done that.
We've done that other show.
We've done it.
But I liked it when brian did
it that's come up before yeah oh that's uh that's really yeah and it'd be great to like you know
brian did it like just to listen to every episode before you actually got it this time every episode
i would be all seven of them so this kind of, of all of our shows, yeah.
There are seven styles of episodes.
So this kind of thing isn't happening.
Just those seven, though.
I do apologize.
You're right.
The seven episodes you meet in heaven.
I should have shown up a little more prepared.
Sorry.
And Kevin, I think it would be nice to let Kevin do one.
That's what I was kind of like getting towards is like not shutting it down,
but it'd be nice to let kevin do food
country as well well you was so critical of his use of cheesy earlier you can't possibly it didn't
sound like that's what he was saying he said it like he was saying he was spelling it like with a
j somewhere at the beginning wasn't it like that cheesy cheesy it was like to me it was gross uh but he's had
so he's had a lot of time now to think about food countries and and um and a really good one
so like let's come on kevin you got this oh paul just posted some fan art paul sheer just posted some fan art is it updating on your shorts it is
if you can it's basically like a braille type experience for you now where you don't even have
to check you can like feel it in a tactile way and you can basically see it in your in your mind's eye
oh yeah it's gonna well my you know my third eye and my sacrum were connected already
wow sure yeah but you can't see us right now while that's happening your visual field is Well, my third eye and my sacrum were connected already. Wow. Sure. Yeah.
But you can't see us right now.
While that's happening, your visual field is totally taken over by the fan art that Paul Scheer posted.
And you can no longer see any of us.
What movie is it a poster for?
Hang on.
I got to feel.
It does it like we talked about like a dot matrix it is like coming
through line by line oh right this could take a minute yeah yeah like in the movie no way out
another movie that's about waiting for a printer to keep printing yeah that's right yeah yeah
what other you know it's not a movie i know no way out no way oh oh i know no way out oh okay oh yeah oh the one that's coming in got it okay
yeah yeah no it's one of these ones where i'm like i not only do i not know it i literally
don't know how it got me beverly hills chihuahua that's cute they would have done that or they're not that one's done yeah yeah hotel for dogs anything
they've done right the dog movies are done cool runnings yeah misery and kevin we were giving
kevin the space to there should have not been so many dogs in that movie in misery in misery yeah it's like all that like it just it made the
it made the world too big didn't it yes absolutely i agree because one of those dogs could have done
something right distracting to have them around they don't end up playing into the story that
much some of them seem like to sean's point about the world being too big that they come in from the neighbor's house to just like hang out and stuff and then it's like
it's like reducing the feeling of isolation that there are so many dogs some of them have
jobs like one of them has a vest and a hard hat yep one of them's a mater d and i'm going
so there you know again it just it feels like the world is very big because
there are so many different people these dogs are interacting with and none of them are you know are
noticing anything different about like the dog's home life at this point it just doesn't add up for
me i understand yeah you would think one of the
dogs would tell the owner right well yeah especially the one dog that's a police officer
it's like you this is a crime that's happening like this dog is a sheriff and there's a crime
taking place in the next room i understand you have some loyalty to your owner but you would
think they would at least feel some duty to report it. Not to mention, don't they have a
very good sense of what we're seeing now?
I'm sure at some point James Caan
bleeds in that movie, probably.
So it seems like they would be attuned
to that.
But, you know, dogs are selfish.
Search dogs. Rescue dogs.
Right.
It looks like Sean is frozen,
but he's actually like he's just gonna think
about this for a little while this has happened on a lot of shows in his third eye yes yeah he
has receded into his sacrum uh which is uh oh are you back already oh wow so paul's got some pretty cool stuff cooking up.
Yeah, it was like a throwback Thursday to a Black Monday, like behind the scenes shot.
Right.
I'll definitely look that up.
A throwback Thursday on a follow Friday.
I know.
To a Black Monday?
That's brilliant.
Yeah.
Well, it's like it's become
divorced from the day itself, right?
It just means an old photo at this
point. Always probably closing.
Yeah. Language
is so
flexible. Yeah.
I love language. And Kevin
was going to do a food country. Oh yeah, did you
do a food country, Kevin?
Germany.
And so germs are not food.
Yes, they are.
They shouldn't be.
Thank you, Brian.
But I don't know that I'm agreeing with you
because they are not.
I agree too, they are.
Maybe if you're a microbe,
they might be food for you.
This is like a specific thing with Kevin
where Kevin is working very hard
to build his personal immunity by eating every germ oh kevin i don't think thanks brian please
actually finish that i'm not like this is an area where i am not you know uh bon vivant or but i'm
not an expert on this what i mean to say i was just
trying to say in different language kevin i think it's a really bad idea for you to eat germs
so that's my story that's my story and he is he does handle it in sort of a bon vivant way
he talks about the mouthfeel of different germs i do i just know yes my the nose and mouth feel of a germ is not
as good as like a you know pepperidge farm or something you know what i mean like i just i know
that so yeah this is gonna make him want to do it more i would say when you tell kevin like hey i
think this is a bad idea he gets very well defiant. Well, that's all teenagers.
That's all teenagers.
It's all teenagers.
That's right.
If it wasn't for germs,
there's so many wonderful foods we wouldn't have, though.
That's true.
Like, what is it called?
Thank you.
Cheese.
Kombucha.
Nerds.
Cheesy.
Nerds look like little germs, kind of, huh?
Yeah. Little creatures on the box.
Also, cheese, kombucha, cheesy.
Chewy nerds uh wine yeah yeah kevin but kevin that was nice i'm like oh this wine this ruined the germs yeah that's what he said this absolutely
it pisses me off absolutely ruined some good germs yeah it's gross seeing him eat all these germs so we a real a real flagpole
liquor we wanted to talk about well don't blow by flagpole liquor what the fuck are you talking
about you know what first of all sean you don't talk to rana that way okay he's a little i don't know who you
think you're talking to but this is i mean she is a woman of a certain age yes and it's very
obvious she's talking about the the harvey danger song flagpole sita but in this case it's licking
it while you're sitting on it kevin likes to lick what other people have put their hands or yes like a flagpole like a flagpole
the thing that everyone you put your hands on it when you're up and pet the flagpole when they have
to put the flag up and down they have to touch it or children have to touch it they have to touch
the pole around a flagpole you might think well they're not touching the actual pole when they're
pulling it up and down they're touching the sort of pulley apparatus that sits just.
But if they lose their balance.
Yeah.
They get dizzy.
Yeah.
Then they have to hold it.
You would have a spun around a flagpole, Sean.
Oh, now this is coming at me.
Well, I made a vow to always be honest with my listeners.
Yes, I spun around a flagpole twice today.
Yeah. I've seen sean be in love today actually one
of the two times sean fell in love and then he like did the thing where he puts one hand on the
flagpole and like goes all the way around oh i love the singing in the rain kind of i get tangled
up in the flag like that yeah have to get cut out of it by paramedics. Shit.
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so we want to do one of these we want to do an advice show where it's like me and sean but we
don't want to do uh me and sean doing it because just because who but he who who wants the advice from us and
also like who wants to really be us for as long as we have yeah and so we have these kind of like
we want to do it as characters which i know um brian you for this show have really
like sunk yourself into this sort of
like Brian character
you're deep inside this
I wear a wig I don't wear glasses
for the character yeah
it's a whole different me yeah
I would say I mean I think number
one and we were sort of mentioning
talking about earlier I think I think
and Ron I don't know what you think but I think these guys need wigs for sure oh yeah i mean i've been wondering or different
wigs than what they're wearing that's true that's true where did you get these wigs yeah this is not
an entire wig only parts of this oh it's just yeah hayes has like extensions yeah it's just a it's just a piece that you uh clip in around the crown yeah like a fall
i would say this i bought mine at ricky's and and it was in new york yes right love ricky's right
that's a great place to pick up a league if you're in new york and you just only have a few minutes
you're in a hurry yeah oh god i land at uh in t-ck and i go straight to ricky's ricky's yeah i mean
where else am i gonna get my well i sit down in the cab the cab driver goes let me guess ricky's
yeah sure they know the type face paint yeah exactly you're gonna need some yeah sure yep
okay you've got a few ricky's wigs is what you're saying and you've got the one on when you're
wearing the one on yeah that when i purchased it it was blue and then you know so i had to dye it
and uh i think it came out pretty pretty lifelike yeah i mean it didn't hold up to the dye too well
so i obviously lost a lot of the wig right um but this is what's left and it's it's sitting on there okay
but i think for these characters you know we're workshopping but i think they'll probably be
named bumby and sticko and so bumby and sticko would be doing the advice show
and uh we don't know who's who because we don't have our wigs yet yeah uh we know we've talked
about like their main thing is they're like they're very hot
they're like it's well popular popular no they're kind of loners they're like very very hot because
they're that hot yeah oh hot as an attractive yes oh they're yeah they're extremely attractive
doing masks and wigs is that what's going on
doing masks wigs and i wouldn't mind one of those sort of upper body muscle things like um uh
on arrested development uh sure he was wearing one for a while yeah um so it was like more
definition who was wearing yeah unarrested development to the young gentleman just and
you know rest in peace to jessica walter but yes famously she on that show that actress herself
was wearing i see a muscle to get into what character that's i'd like i'd like a hans and
franz possibly sort of you up yeah yeah i want to be pumping you up. Hayes, it's okay.
I don't have to take credit for the food competition.
I heard it afterwards
because I was first picturing the Jessica Waltz,
that one.
And then when I actually reached me,
the Hans and Franz,
I said, oh man, yeah,
that would be great for me to pump you up like that.
So you should.
And you know what you could do?
You say, we're here to pump you up with advice.
We'll pump you up with advice.
That feels very sticko to me.
Less Bubby.
Okay.
Go.
That is Bumby.
I think it's Bumby.
There's an M.
Bumby.
Yeah.
Oh, Bumby.
I thought it was Bubby.
No.
Bumby.
Bumby and sticko.
Not even close. Not even close.
Not even close. Two hot
guys that you
want to get advice from.
Who are also loners.
Jobs?
Yeah, what would their jobs be?
It's tough to describe
what they're...
But they do... I don't know what the name
of this job is, but they bust ghosts.
Oh, okay.
What would you call that?
Paranormal police.
The paranormal police.
Right.
Yes.
Spirit busters.
Yeah.
Spirit busters.
I think the paranormal police is totally fine.
Yes.
Okay.
That's great.
And they go around just like capturing, imprisoning ghosts.
All female.
Ghosts.
All female.
Why?
I mean, I would say, then I would leave out the word imprisonment.
Yeah. Okay. Well, they out the word imprisonment. Yeah.
Okay.
Well, they've done really bad stuff.
Yeah.
Well, I mean, maybe they got a raw shake.
Bumby and Sticko.
No, Bumby and Sticko.
Bumby and Sticko kick ass.
They're giving advice.
They're hot as hell.
They're ripped.
The paranormal women stand no chance.
Why don't they have any friends?
They seem unapproachable, even to each other.
They're not really good friends with each other because they're so hot.
You know when you're so hot that you don't get asked out?
It's like, how are you single when you're so hot?
And it's like, well, no one will ask me out.
And that is happening to them, but with friendship.
That's another thing to say. You're're too funny you're too smart yeah right yeah you put together i always tell rana she has to be the
one to approach a man because they're going to be too nervous yes but who wants to date a man you
have to approach and like i never did this but if i had approached like avril lavigne when i was like in middle
school she would have been middle school now but yeah like middle early high school i think she
would have been like oh like no one has actually like right been kind of brave enough people are
like intimidated by me because of my outfit and her rock persona exactly but like actually i really would i i wanted someone to
approach me like this and like yeah and if i had approached like carly simon when i was in middle
school or something i i feel like it's like obviously beautiful singing voice yes you know
that's the least i mean it's the songwriting yeah you know yeah the songwriting that song attitude dancing so good yeah yeah gorgeous woman but i think she probably would
have had a similar reaction where she would have said wow i've no one's been bold enough
to this point to really just come up and lay it out there and say hey i'm into you
are we doing this thing or not that is so sexy but then you would have run the risk of being the subject of you're so vain
which who like no one wants that yeah but it could have been in this case like you're so vain and
this and that's good and that's what attracts me to you you're so vain you had enough confidence
to finally approach me you know that yeah that could have been actually a positive that's true and it scans
what what scans you had the confidence finally approached me oh oh he writes perfect scans with
the meter yeah oh i don't know what any of those words mean together i guess it just means like
it fits yeah it's just like music language we uh yeah we talked about this like you walked up to
ask me out and i could tell you were in middle school right now is that you a bumby singing
right now oh yeah what are the voices carly simon oh that's carly sim Simon singing about me, Bumby. Yeah. Lucky you. With an M, yeah.
Do you all have voices for Bumby and Sticko?
Not really.
They don't.
Not finished.
Do they talk?
Yeah.
Okay.
Sean, do you want to do...
Sean has one that is definitely part of the way done.
Okay.
Yeah, hang on.
Hang on.
Oh, he's stretching his face a lot hang on pass the pepper
oh yeah okay it's like very dignified yeah i mean this isn't it doesn't scream let me ask you for advice and and it screams 55 to 60
yeah yeah i've been playing with a variation on it okay tight sphincter that's what i'm getting
from that voice totally pass that pepper oh even tighter yeah that is that's worse that's worse
it felt worse as i was doing it now that he's now specified which pepper.
Yeah.
There's two peppers.
It was more specific in content.
Oh, I thought it was a colloquialism.
I thought it was geographic.
Pass that pepper.
You know, just that's how they say it.
But that could work that way, whereas the first one, it's pretty clear, you know, he's
asking for pepper.
Right.
But it doesn't have to be that.
It doesn't have to be any of this. You know, I think the wig will bring a lot of the voice with me and also i was thinking
and the walk really tiny you know glasses okay yeah what do you think that's gonna bring yeah
how small yeah well i they're definitely gonna be they have no like arms on them they're just rest on your nose yeah just pinched over the nose
is that what it's called yeah yeah i don't know a ton about guy in a wig with tiny glasses
yes and muscular oh in the muscular that's yeah with like yeah super well defined but huge as well yeah yeah okay right and so like massive so many
rivulets yeah we're looking at a pretty complicated topography of musculature yeah okay all right well
can i ask you guys an advice question and maybe you could help me sure we'll try what sticko's
voice sounds like and that's actually fine because so far oh i'm so sorry
no it's okay and like maybe you were picking up on this but like he he is hard to hear over the
sound of the the paranormal pistol that he is constantly reload firing right at these at these spirits at uh and just yeah the sound of the reloading is really it's a walther
uh like p 22 or 22 yeah oh sure yeah paranormal version right and so it's like uh it's very
uh it just kind of like hooks on to the index finger basically It's like just a little it's just like a little
hidden thing
but it's shooting out the ectoplasm
and it's loud.
Rana, do you own a gun?
That's a serious question.
Rana, you should get a gun.
Rana, how many guns?
I was just curious.
I do not own a gun.
Dream gun, go.
Do you want a gun?
What's your dream gun a derringer
oh yes and it fits right in the top of your boot huh yeah do you like that for me a derringer nice
high boot and you pull the derringer out yeah not so fast yeah i love it could be just like
something just like sticko i keep it in my stocking is that what sticko does
he keeps it in his stocking and he got and he got that small you have to keep in your panties
that's true yeah or in a tiny gun in a gotta yeah that's true yeah very sexy rana could have like a
wrist mechanism that goes like all the way up her for rana's got a 007 something going on yeah it would appear to be something
else it would have to appear as something else and then right like an umbrella that has a camera
or a gun at the end of it yeah yeah or a corsage that squirts water a cat correct yeah a cat i'm
not really oh a cat that you said i was gonna say i'm not really a cat person so that would be tricky I know that's why I didn't say that
and I never would
I guess yeah I guess well I mean
nobody asked Bumby but
in character I guess Bumby would probably want
I feel like we're hurting your feelings a lot on this show
no it's okay but Bumby probably have a
it's not us it's
some paranormal version of like
like a cobalt mouseberg 550 with a pistol grip extended barrel of like a like a cobalt mouseberg
550 with a pistol grip
extended barrel probably like a
side saddle for extra ammo
and your voice changes a little
when you talk about that guy that's he's the
character oh god I'm so sorry
I'm so sorry okay
so sorry and then and
and pass that pepper
yes pass that pistol yeah you could adapt it
you could that's what the pepper it's like a pepper shot the pepper mill could be a pistol
oh okay i like it uh and brian something i'm cooking up in my lab yeah brian what's your
dream oh i was wondering if anyone was going to ask me i'm
glad someone finally showed up yeah a bunch of people did everyone asked you oh no i was just
waiting it's so funny uh what kind of gun probably uh you know son son mother 38 with the click on
cap and uh wow one of those mother i would get a son mother and wood furniture on that
thing are you going aftermarket uh some kind of hoag molded plastic i think i would do some sort y yes ds dl dlsr internet
i think i would do and then you know can i tell you what i do tldr
are you saying that what i said was just too long yeah too long i didn't i get passionate
i get passionate yeah i guess so yeah sorry hey look i asked the question right you did but son i would say my son
mother yeah son mother son mother aftermarket diy no wood furniture on that thing something
about being the mother of a son and that's honestly like those are the strongest people
in the world why do you think i like rana so much yes the people that are mothers to sons
the people that are mother yes like mothers are like strong but like the mothers of sons
especially like that's yes the energy that i want because let's face it you're not really a mother
if you have a daughter you know because you're just a couple of girls right you're just two girls yeah that's actually just buddies
it's called being buddies yeah that makes sense yeah yeah and like you know we always like to try
and bring kevin oh kevin yes he has a he has a if he has a dream gun we can hear i would love to
hear about that mine is a as a wand and when i say my special spell
it shoots bullets shoots bullets huh yeah that does feel very on brand it's hard to get on his
side isn't it ron yeah yeah he's so he's so hufflepuff it's hard to get on his side kevin talks a lot about cho chang is what's that that's the character
from harry potter that's like his girlfriend for a little while okay it's awful it's awful the way
just how much he like talks about like this and like the different spells the spells that they
would use on each other if he was at
hogwarts it's like right really really he's thought about it so so much what would the
wand look like i am actually curious is it just literally a stick it looks exactly like a gun oh
yeah right but it is a wand it's firing spells right okay i like it
so now i like it now i think we can market that where can we hear
the show uh yes that's a good place to start okay i hey i don't love you coming at haze like that
but even i gotta give it up when you score one on the champ and i'm always waiting for someone
to do that it's like where can we uh listen like to the show and it's like uh uh in the other ears
you know yeah no he wasn't surprised to hear it.
He always is waiting for someone to do it.
But still, still it was cool.
Well, that's an old Boston zing, of course.
That's very regional.
I love it.
It's a very regional response to
where can I listen to your podcast?
Yeah, that's been around forever.
Should we do one piece of advice?
One advice question.
And then we'll,
and then we'll,
you know,
hear all about your stuff and then we'll leave.
Okay.
And then we'll be done.
Who's doing the advice question.
We're going to ask you,
you ask us.
Okay.
And we can ask Kevin for help because we are still developing the character.
Well,
Ronna,
maybe we could do like one that we've answered before just to see what their take might be.
Okay.
I could just briefly say something about either the Airbnb thing or what do you think?
That's a good one.
Yeah.
We could do Airbnb.
That's an uncomplicated one.
But you're going to have to try and remember.
Or the dog and the wine.
We could do that. The dog and the wine. We could do that.
The dog and the wine.
Yeah, you don't remember.
Or the vodka.
The dog and the vodka.
Oh my, Sean is literally yawning.
We'll get a little sleepy listening to the process of choosing.
The uncle, the uncle, the uncle.
Oh, the dog and the wine.
That was good.
I think you just have to try and recreate.
I think you should do the Airbnb one, but you should try and recreate it if you can.
The Airbnb one.
Okay.
Well, what I can even do is I can pull up the question.
Oh, what kind of filing system have you got there?
WeWork.
Fascinating.
I'm impressed.
WeWork.
You've rented a we work to file your
any question that you can find brian that you like i'm happy with okay let me see here
um so like while i'm finding out like what's new with you guys we're just waiting for the question. Like, have you guys seen any, like, children in movies?
So we're not doing the Airbnb one.
We are.
I'm trying to find it.
So the question is, have we seen any children in movies?
I'm just trying to find conversation topics until I can pull this up.
Well, I'm nervous to answer this.
I'll find it for you.
Hold on.
Okay.
Well, that doesn't mean stop looking, do you?
I am still looking.
I need to know why you want to know
if I've seen children in movies before I tell you.
I don't need to know.
I was just trying to think of something
that everyone could talk about while I find that email.
Well, I don't think you did a good job.
I think you should have kept thinking.
Who's leading the workshop here? That's what I want that email. Well, I don't think you did a good job. I think you should have kept thinking because that... Who's leading the workshop here?
That's what I want to know.
Me too.
I don't know.
I don't know.
I want to know too.
Kevin, can you help me with this?
What adults have you seen in movies lately?
That's great.
What a really good question.
Yes.
Thank you.
Wow.
Jason Patrick.
What'd you see him in snark okay uh okay i found it okay you
want to forward it to me or do you want to read it no i'm gonna forward it to you hold on rana
i will say this and i hate to brag like right at the end of your show but um rana says i'm a really
good reader so he is that's really. That's really nice. Yeah.
Terrific reader.
We should do that stuff for each other, Ace.
Compliments?
Yeah.
All right, dear.
There you are.
The most refreshing mint there is. It should be on the bottom of that email that I just sent.
Did you send it to my email, Rana?
As opposed to?
Well, the Ask Rana email.
No, that's where I found it, dear.
And then I forwarded it to you personally. Brian, you're kind of the admin of the Ask Ronna email? No, that's where I found it, Tia. And then I forwarded it to you personally.
Brian, you're kind of the admin of the Ask Ronna email.
I know, but see, usually I do this in my WeWork.
It certainly doesn't seem that way.
It doesn't seem that way.
Okay, you ready for it?
Here we go.
This is an actual question that we received.
I know.
Okay, so this is the one on the bottom.
Okay, here we go.
This is a real question. At the bottom here we go this is the bottom
I believe
yes
I'm writing to get
clarification on something
that happened to me
and my partner
and to see if our response
to a bizarre situation
was appropriate
for Thanksgiving this year
my partner's family
rented a house
for everyone
in a very small
beach town
this was pre-pandemic
just so people understand
my partner and I
like to sneak up
to this charming town
in the summers and thought we'd simplify our traveling and stay somewhere else.
Sneak up.
Sure.
The town doesn't suspect a thing.
Exactly.
The town doesn't know what's coming.
That makes it a getaway.
That's true.
The town never sees us coming.
And we thought we'd stay somewhere else one night on our own the night before everyone got to town.
We struggled to find-
We're being very sneaky.
Very sneaky.
Remember, this question is for Bumby and Sticko.
Oh, that's right. So you guys better get in character. We're getting ready to sneaky. Remember, this question is for Bumby and Sticko. So that's right.
So you guys are getting ready to answer.
We struggled to find dog friendly accommodations on a holiday.
And luckily, we were able to reserve a lovely carriage house.
This is where things go off the rails.
When we got to the property around 7 p.m., no one was home.
I called the owner's cell phone number he had given me, and it went to voicemail.
Being that it was dinnertime the night before Thanksgiving, I assumed he was out with friends.
I walked back to the carriage house, and the door was unlocked.
The heat was on.
The bed was bare, but pillows and sheets were stacked neatly on the footbench.
I went back out to the car and let my partner know that it seemed like the room was half
finished, but maybe that's just how this single guy ran his rental.
As we were unloading the car, a neighbor walked over and asked if we knew the owner. We said, no, we were just renting the house.
That's when the neighbor let us know that the owner had died suddenly that morning.
He went on to say we should still stay in the house anyway and gave us several recommendations
for dinner. We were shocked but weren't sure what to do. On the one hand, it was freezing,
and we were three hours away from home and another several hours away from my partner's parents' home.
We had our dog and we knew we weren't going to be able to find another place to stay in town.
On the other hand, it did feel incredibly inappropriate to stay there.
We had some back and forth and decided to stay.
We went to dinner and were in bed early.
We got up very early the next morning to grab coffee.
While we were walking our dog, we bumped into the neighbor from the night before.
We chatted about the place we'd gone to dinner on his recommendation, and we felt better about our
decision to stay. However, when we were packing up, a different neighbor came by. He seemed agitated
that we were there and gave us the number of one of the owner's friends to call regarding our
checkout. We felt terrible. He was distraught. I stripped the bed, put things back how I found
them, and texted the friend on our way to the driveway. The friend and I had some back and forth.
I extended sympathies for his loss and thanks for the warm place to stay, and he seemed generally unfazed by the fact that we'd stayed there.
My partner and I keep discussing it.
We're not sure it was appropriate to stay there.
Please weigh in.
What would you have done?
Would you stay in an Airbnb where the owner had died that morning?
WID.
Okay.
I think Bumby can field this.
Okay.
I wrote this.
Shit.
The character?
So I can't answer.
Yeah.
So I can't answer it.
Wait, but that's...
Because this was me.
It was Bumby.
This was me.
You stayed Bumby, huh?
How do you feel about it now well I mean I feel
better
now
knowing that the owner
was a really bad guy
so on your advice show you would write in questions
for yourself
unfortunately that's the one that came up was one that I had
written in
he stayed there as like
revenge so he thinks that it was disrespectful but he's glad i am worried i am worried about
this show i just want you both to know well let me see how stick out let me see let's let's let
stick oh try and see how stick i would respond to Yeah. Don't ask me to read it again because I can't.
Okay, I was waiting for you to read the entire thing.
Go ahead without me reading it.
But I guess I'll just go off what I remember.
Remember, yeah.
What?
Slimer's wife has been eating pets?
Powering up.
Slimer's wife stand down now
you forced my hand
when we came on the show
I was deeply worried
we were doing an advertisement for their
new advice show I'd be worried too
Walter P22 doesn't have that
sort of automatic
kind of machine gun firing capability.
That's the side saddle.
Can I give you guys the real deal?
The real deal.
Yeah, sure.
Like the Hollywood perspective.
Yeah.
Please.
Please.
Yeah.
Yeah, of course.
Thanks, but no thanks.
You're not cut out for it. We're going in a different direction it we're going in a different direction we're going
in a different don't call us because of this episode yeah don't call us we'll call you um
what you see is what you get don't judge a book by its cover what didn't you like about that
you would love to hear what rana break it down what did you think was wrong with it i think my main problem was that it had nothing
to do with the question yeah that was life rana that is how life works anyway relevant to the
concern of the lista it was completely authentic oh i don't doubt it and it's not a second that
that was an authentic reaction i don't doubt for a second and by the way rana he said it's not like life i can tell you right now mr rutherford that the last time
i asked someone my character's name is stick oh you're right he was just talking to bumby
bumby rutherford whatever oh that's right whatever oh yeah in my head you're right. He was just talking to Bambi. Bambi Rutherford.
Whatever.
Oh, that's right.
Whatever.
Oh, yeah.
In my head, you're sort of upperclassmen. My name's Stiko.
I forgot I took my wife's last name.
Right.
Okay.
In my opinion, I have...
Not in my opinion, in my life,
I have never asked an advice question
and gotten info about Slimer's wife.
That has never happened in life for me.
So you would want...
So if you ask for advice,
you would want the paranormal
police to allow Slimer's wife
to continue eating pets. You get an emergency
call. So what happens on 911
crime? Got your answer. You're just
going through like your life and then
like. I don't.
I don't. You call 911.
About my inner life of my characters.
I don't do that. I don't do that i don't and the police
say look i'm supposed to be reporting to a murder but first let me finish and you're being murdered
you call 911 they go hang on let me finish giving this guy advice about this airbnb he stayed at
by the way it's me right i'm not even that conflicted over it
anymore because i found out the owner is actually a bad guy yeah oh yeah yeah so he basically closed
the book on it anyway so it wasn't so then so then oh but don't but oh but they're not gonna
go report and help your murder or the or mrs slimer eating your pets okay i gotta be honest
with you i don't know what the fuck you're talking about not one clue that's obvious
but i think honestly i it was depressing that's how i felt about this episode what's
your advice show called great question it put me in a low mood that's called giving up the ghosts with bumby and stick that's cute i kind of like that that's
cute there is an apostrophe after given that's cute i do that put that you got me back now i
think that's kind of cute is it on apple podcast what isn't great oh yeah you can find us grana anywhere
and we have our show giving up our show oh i thought you were asking our show your show
we want to know what your show is bumby where you had distributed the show no our show is wherever
you get your podcasts oh ask rana with rana and brian and it comes out on tuesdays and then we have a patreon
that comes out on fridays just like you too yep yeah we have 19 shows that is the same
oh stay by the bell yeah bye
this week on the patreon carl and asan discuss shoes, the boys update their wills,
and the flagrant ones are mostly talking all things basketball.
Check out the bonus podcast and videos of the full episodes,
including the one you just heard with Rana and Brian, at patreon.com slash the flagrant ones.
Hollywood Handbook.
That was a HeadGum Podcast.