Hollywood Handbook - Shea Serrano, Our Quiz Friend
Episode Date: April 28, 2020The Boys welcome SHEA SERRANO to participate in The Ultimate Sports and Movies Quiz and Rap. See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com.../privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.
Transcript
Discussion (0)
this is a head gum podcast
all right i'm gonna start the theme song multiple times a day that's not it okay what was what was
that stop kevin don't blow by it what did you play what was that that was the uh uh today's
episode of the teacher's lounge they did a thing in Cancun.
Can you imagine?
Hold on.
I'm happy you're here for this, Shay.
So Kevin, who's the producer of our show,
started our show by just listening to a different comedy podcast
that he likes better.
What do you think the punishment should be for a producer who does that?
I have no idea, but that seems like highly nefarious.
Yeah.
Has that ever happened to you?
It's treason.
Has that happened to you before?
The closest that I've come to that is nobody in my house, with the exception of my youngest
son, the seven-year-old has read
any parts of any of my books he's the only one who did because there was a chapter in the movie
book about jurassic park and he likes the dinosaurs he's the only one i've ever had a
conversation with about something i've written but imagine if they were reading different books or
yeah yeah that were very similar to yours or perhaps uh listening to an episode of
like unspooled for example about total recall instead of your episode of the rewatchables
about the exact same thing because that's what i have just uh been forced to see and hear right
before i'm supposed to like do a good job because Because Kevin is being paid actually to like my show.
So it would be as if you had,
I guess if you were giving
your seven-year-old an allowance
and you came home to him
reading a rival book.
That's where we are with things, huh?
That is where,
that would be where we are.
This is a,
this has got to be the toughest
start to a podcast for Kevin.
I'm imagining that
y'all have had so far.
This is actually one of the better ones.
Okay, let's try this again.
It's a tough start for me.
Do we even do our theme song now, Hayes?
Or do we, I mean...
No, no, no.
Imagine if that happened again.
I know.
I can't risk letting him press play on anything.
No.
I guess we just have to get right into the show.
So, welcome to Hollywood Handbook.
Insider's Guide to Kicking Button.
Dropping names in the red carpet linebacker.
Always, this isn't true.
We call showbiz.
Call showbiz.
Showbiz.
We have with us a very special guest.
He's already mentioned his book.
He's got books.
Writing books.
Multiple books.
He's doing podcasts. He's already mentioned his book. He's got books. Writing books. He's doing podcasts.
He's writing articles.
Listicles.
He's doing it all.
He's Shea Serrano.
Rap book.
Movies book.
Give a what up what up.
Basketball book.
Basketball book.
And other things.
Yeah.
This is the worst introduction i've ever gotten
on a podcast all right all right you want to talk about um
you want to talk about uh spotify yeah yeah i want to talk about everything yeah
get into the talk about that what was your slice of that what was my slice of your slice of the spotify deal when they when the
ringer when they sold the ringer to spotify i got 47 million dollars off wow that's a good chunk
that's a nice little chunk of social distancing is going pretty good for me right now you would
be doing that anyway with 47 million dollars that'd be just about it for me in society we've got to check like that um are they like hanging out uh uh at the office or like like are are they like chill
the spotify people are they like uh swedish guy are they doing funny bits like what like
yeah uh no you know what i work remotely i work in san antonio so i'm already i
was already by myself anyway i have no idea what's going on anywhere other than in my living room
yeah lazy river walk river walk inner tube that's the that's the thing we do often in san antonio
get an inner tube and just float down the river walk. How many times a day you go to the Alamo?
Probably like six or seven.
Six or seven, yeah.
That's what I was going to guess.
Six or seven.
I appreciate probably under social distancing,
you can't bump into people anymore
when they're trying to have a nice,
just have a little nap on the river walk and people are just
in the inner tube and people
are like bumping into you and stuff and like kind of
trying to like brush up against you
because you're in a bathing suit. Yeah.
And now you can get arrested for that. I think
that's good. Yeah. That's the best
part of all of this is that nobody
bothers you in your inner tube in the river walk
and your bathing suit. That's the silver lining
I've been looking for um shay what the ringer proved that movies could be sports
and that sports could be movies as well okay talk about this just talk about what you just said go
don't hold back at all i see you nervous can i say what i really
mean i don't know what what uh what i'm supposed to be saying like i feel like you're just saying
like six words that don't all the way connect but kind of do and then you go but talk about that
so i'm a little i'm a little spun around right now. Do you disagree? I agree wholeheartedly.
And it speaks for itself in a way.
People thought that these were different things.
People would watch a movie and they would say,
actually, this cannot be sports.
And the people would watch sports and they'd say,
actually, this can never be movies.
And the ringer, knocker knock knock let me get that
yeah actually they can and they are and they are the same they're always the same
and i've always believed this as well and have actually always talked about it and in fact did and for a long time
Sean and I have
been talking about
sort of our
maybe the biggest project we've ever
done huge
and we have always been
workshopping it and refining it and
perfecting it and
have you seen Mr. Holland's opus
yes so this is sort of this is sort of Mr. Clemens and Mr. holland's opus yes so this is sort of uh this is sort of mr clemens and mr
davenport's opus got it we've been working on this our entire lives so many stories
to you know hit me with it children in and out and everything and finally we are going to we
actually are going to hit you with if you just wait wait one second. I'm ready. I am. I'm ready.
The project is called
The Ultimate Sports and Movies Quiz.
Okay.
And essentially it is...
Just okay.
Don't blow by it.
Is that a great title or what?
I don't know.
It depends on whatever it is
that's about to be said after this
because it could be good. It could be a terrible
title. There's no telling
already with you two. We've been on the phone for
five minutes. I have no idea what direction
we're going in right now.
Has it only been five
minutes? It feels
like longer, but I just looked at my
recorder and it's five minutes. Yeah, that's
true. I saw him check.
Okay. All right. right well i think you're
going to be pleasantly surprised we're going in a direction that is viral we're going fully viral
again on this show all right because this ultimate sports and movie quiz is our life's work as we've
said and you are going to be the first person to ever take the quiz
i'm super excited except we have tested it out like a couple times like uh oh yeah beta versions
prototypes yeah um and uh or perhaps you're wondering if we stumped the schwab with this
quiz yes we did okay that's a good though like i don't want to be the pre-season you know i don't even want to be
the regular season i want to be the post-season here we are uh yeah do you ever meet the schwab
several times yeah yeah what was that like we were texting maybe like two weeks ago uh-huh and
i uh ever since the show was on espn i do this thing where like twice a week, I'll just text them a picture of an actual stump.
And then I go like, you got stumped.
And then he just laughs and laughs and we have a great big laugh about it.
Yeah.
I've been with him when he gets that text and he actually had to take a break and leave.
Hands on his head like he could barely breathe.
It's great.
It's great.
That's a really...
It might be my best bit.
Yeah.
That's a really nice relationship um uh i guess it gives me no pleasure to report that he did die from this this
quiz being too hard yikes well but he'll always have those stump texts and i believe that they
actually had put up a few of the stump photos you found at his actual funeral in an attempt to sort
of lighten the mood.
It does make me feel better about this situation.
And a lot of the eulogy was about the texts of photos of actual stumps.
That's all you can hope for.
Again, we're always finding a silver lining in the sun rays among the clouds.
So, Hayes, do you want to start giving the quiz?
This quiz is called the ultimate sports
and movies quiz and rap all right and rap as well those are the last two words and rap the
last two words are in rap okay and rap awesome this first is just kind of like to um it's an
initial test but it's also to kind of like get your feet just
to throw you right into it but also to kind of get you a sense of um the quiz and um uh just the way
we think so here's the first level yes and please like will you share your thought process like
talk through it you can get help from kevin but your score won't count if you do
um and just yeah if you have follow-up questions't count if you do. And just, yeah,
if you have follow-up questions for us,
if you feel like it's vague or anything,
just go ahead and kick it to us.
All right.
And you can guess as many times as you want.
Okay.
Who is the guy from the Chicago Bulls?
BJ Armstrong.
There's no question about it.
So that is,
that's a really good guess.
That is not right, but that is really smart.
This is, and so I knew that we were right to do this with you.
This is his friend.
Is B.J. Armstrong's friend?
B.J. Armstrong's friend.
Oh, Jack Haley then.
No.
It's great guess.
Really smart.
It's actually, that's not right.
This guy is from the Chicago Bulls
and he's more like, he's his friend,
but I think a little bit BJ even looks up to him.
Oh, I got it.
Oh, then that has to be Bill Cartwright.
No.
Such a good guess.
No.
You want me to
keep going? Yeah. Please.
Carlos Boozer.
That I
don't think they are even friends.
I'm pretty sure they are.
But you don't even know who the guy is.
Together.
Famous. He's like like the
most famous chicago bull no it's yokim noah then no he's not friends with him either
we can't spend the whole time on this all right let's try the next question
try another one you're skipping this one yeah the The quiz is not built for that. We can't see the next question until this does get answered.
It's like your password on your iPhone.
You just can't go.
Unfortunately, yeah.
Yeah.
And we have hid the answers from ourselves.
Okay.
I got it.
Wait, if you hid the answers from yourselves, then I don't think...
When it gets entered correctly, it will show us the following question.
I'm pretty sure BJ Armstrong was the right one.
I'm going to go back to BJ Armstrong.
Okay, it's still in my head.
This guy, what I know of him, he's friends with a sandwich.
Okay.
Well, I remember reading a profile in the New Yorker one time about Scottie Pippen
was friends with a sandwich maker. Is it Scottie Pippen?
Yes.
It is Scottie Pippen.
It is Scottie Pippen.
I knew it. I knew it. I knew I was going to get there.
Thank you for not letting me just pass that question.
Dude. And how shitty would you feel?
Like 80% shitty.
If we had just been like, okay, give up. Not really what you're known for, is it?
Just throwing in the towel.
Sean, would you like to take the next question?
Absolutely, absolutely.
This guy, he's Italian.
Oh, that's Christopher from The from the sopranos huh oh that is so interesting that you would go straight
to like a mafia guy for an italian person and that actually is the worst kind of racism that
has ever existed but um it is a difficult quiz yeah it is uh that is not right this guy you know be hard
and to reveal things about people so we found out we have a prejudice today what do we do
there's a whole a whole story arc in the sopranos about that exact thing
the guy i don't know if you were i don't know if you remember but i remember i remember columbus day they were trying to get rid of it and i was so mad on their behalf and that and just to point
out it's actually like you know you may have not known this but that actually is not sports or
movies or and rap but this guy's not some italian stereotype or something he is pizza he loves pizza oh the the guy from the red baron box that's getting
really close so baron you're so warm it's really close um i you know what i think um i think i have
to go with marissa tomei i know you said guy but i just want to throw that out there marissa tomei
we do not do that kind
of trick question is that it and of course she's the first person i think of when i do hear pizza
but this this case this is someone he is a guy he is uh he has a weapon um oh i know it i know what then i know okay yeah it's joey fatone from his voice his voice is of
course his powerful vocal range thank you that was it i nailed it i knew it as soon as you said
that as soon as you said that hint i knew what it was it's not him perhaps it should have been
this man loves pizza and he loves it twice. Oh, Vincent Gallo.
Vincent Gallo.
That's got to be it.
So actually, I will give it to you.
Thank you.
On this one.
I knew it.
The answer, of course, was Little Caesar,
but who was initially designed,
like the physical inspiration was, of course, but who was initially designed,
like the physical inspiration was, of course,
inspired by Vincent Gallo.
Based on Vincent Gallo, yes.
Right down to his brown bunny.
I remember when we were little and we would get Little Caesar's Pizza
and right on the corner of the box,
it says inspired by Vincent Gallo with an arrow.
And it used to be, remember when we were kids,
it was a much more photorealistic drawing than it is now.
Like a Leonardo da Vinci sketch.
I remember that.
Of Vincent Gallo in the.
When I was little, it was, as you opened the box,
it was a hologram and it played out an entire sequence from Buffalo 66
where he brags about how he normally drives automatic cars just like this
yeah see that was before my time but i remember hearing about they were like it's very star wars
inspired like i get it yeah i remember that all right let's move on to the next question
in the ultimate sports and movies quiz and rap who are those guys in that car the guys in the car were the the people from the kendrick lamar
video the beginning of the all right video when they're riding around that's my that's that's it
right let me see if it was the same guys first try i don't think so i don't think it was them
that's probably not these oh i know i know please it was tom hardy in
the movie lock and he's in the car tom hardy is okay so i'll tell you this about he is in the car
and there is other guys in the car but i don't know if you pick this up from the movie those
are fake those are his imagination and so he is actually only the one guys who's in the car.
Tom Hardy contains multitudes.
So when you see one Tom Hardy, you are in fact seeing several Tom Hardys.
Okay.
I don't think that's true.
I'm sorry.
I think he is only one guy.
I think y'all are wrong on this one.
I mean, I trust your opinion on a lot of pop culture stuff,
but the idea that Tom Hardy is multiple guys,
I don't think that is right.
Can you name one movie where there wasn't just one Tom Hardy in it?
Well, I mean...
Give me the question again.
I don't want to.
I don't want to say it again.
Can I name one movie where there wasn't just
one tom hardy in it there see you got it all right no i know i was well it does seem like
shot to be fair it does seem like you didn't have to ask the question again at the very least
it does seem like you did know what the question was yeah where there wasn't just
one now of course there was a movie legend i can't where he is two guys
he's two guys ronnie the cray brothers the twins yeah wow that's the one i'm thinking of two people
so in your face both both of you it's tom hardy i'm suck as the cray brothers in a car in lock
is your answer it's not it's not what i'm thinking that's what yeah
i thought i thought it was tended the answer to be i thought it was pretty clear when i said it
but i guess not it's not that's not that's not the answer no it's not the answer dude it's like
i have so much respect for you and on especially on a topic like this, it's like you're actually who I would normally look to as sort of my idol to be like, this guy will know the answer.
And it's pissing me off how wrong Tom Hardy has to McRae Brothers in the movie Locke is.
See, the thing is, if you approach it like that, if I'm the guy, if I'm the guy you go to, the guy you look up to, but you don't understand the answer, that can't be on me.
Like when you read the Bible, sometimes you don't get what God is intending.
Not true.
I think we, I think.
Not true.
I think that's the situation.
Give me any page of the Bible.
I'll tell you exactly what he intended.
Page 62.
Worship me. Stumped. tell you exactly what he intended page 62 all right yeah that's probably right yeah you're probably right my bad sean you got it sean you were right you're right this feels good these guys are in the car you like these guys they're
always in these cars you love them i love them yeah oh it's got to be uh uh mike myers and dana carvey
and wayne's world oh and now i'm imagining okay smart now i'm imagining them being these guys
and i'm like okay yeah uh liking that no is it the it's the fast and the furious people that's correct it is yeah as soon
as y'all said that in his entire family yeah i'm trying to like step around the answers but
y'all but you know that was really pretty good to get that in three guesses well okay so whenever i
do these interviews people always want to talk to me me about one of five things. Fast and the Furious
is one of them. We don't
want to talk to you about it if that wasn't clear.
We want you to answer the quiz and watch
the next question.
Keep it moving as quickly as possible.
Please.
Hollywood Handbook.
Eating better is easy with
factors. Delicious, ready
to eat meals. Every fresh never frozen meal is chef crafted, dietician delicious, ready-to-eat meals. Every fresh, never-frozen meal is chef-crafted,
dietitian-approved, ready-to-go in just two minutes.
Speaking of ready-to-go in just two minutes,
Chef Kevin is here with his new show,
The Chef Kevin Factor,
where he creates fresh, never-frozen meals.
Now, this is different, Kevin.
I just want to establish.
It's none of this, like, here's a pile of ingredients.
Like, this is the meal.
The meal has to be ready.
It's not a recipe.
Okay?
This is the meal.
You cook the full meal for us now, Kevin.
Yeah.
You don't just send us a bunch of stuff you had laying around in your cabinet.
You're actually
doing the cooking and there are 35 different options to choose from every week including
calorie smart protein plus and keto which is this it's a little bit of all of them okay okay it
shouldn't be there are also more than 60 add-ons to help you stay fueled up and feeling good all
day long how many add-ons and what are
some of them it's one big add-on and it's you on your bed you're so tired after you eat my meal
the promises the meal makes us sleepy you've been pushing that so much you're saying that you will
be added on to your bed yeah your bed plus one that's the opposite of what this is supposed to
do it's supposed to help you stay fueled up and feel good all day long.
A lot of these, I know, give you a ton of energy.
They have smoothies and things like that.
This is wrong.
Reservation for two, me walking in my bedroom.
What's the second?
It's you and your bed?
My bed.
I guess Clippy.
Fuel up fast with Factor's restaurant-quality meals that are ready to heat and eat wherever you are.
Pancake, smoothies, and more.
Discover a wide variety of easy options for the entire day like breakfast, midday
bites and more.
This is
not even up for consideration.
Let's just hear what the actual meal was.
What was the food? I don't want to go to bed.
It's very simple. It's
one huge
chicken nugget. Sign up and save.
We've done the math. Factor is less expensive
than takeout. Every meal is dietitian approved to be nutritious and delicious head to factor meals.com slash the boys
50 and use code the boys 50 to get 50 off that's code the boys 50 at factor meals.com slash the
boys 50 to get 50 off be a better you in 2024 with babble the science-backed language learning app that
actually works don't pay hundreds of dollars for private tutors or waste hours on apps that don't
really help you speak the language and the question that i always get people stop me and they say like
hey i like i i trust you i know like you when you endorse a product,
it's something that you really use and care about.
But there's one language that I'm trying to learn,
and that's body language.
Can Babbel teach me body language?
Yes.
Babbel now has visual, in-person lessons.
Part of their quick 10-minute lessons that they do for other languages
handcrafted by over 200 language experts to help you start speaking a new language in as little as
three weeks babbles designed by real people for real conversations and that includes body-based
conversations what does it mean when you drop someone off after a nice date and they turn around at the door and they take their little
index finger and they kind of like draw it towards them they're pulling it what does that mean does
their finger hurt i wonder if they spotted a spider web or something they're trying to pull
down the spider down yeah but i've seen this too after a lot of dates and i need i need and have needed something like
babble to figure out what the heck is this person doing with their finger because it looks like a
it looks like an emergency i know i was supposed to do something or how about those people that
stand in the street they're kind of like they've got like almost like police
clothes on it may be almost yeah and they're standing in the middle and as i'm driving and
i'm cruising they're holding their hand up for like a high five almost and they're really
aggressively like pushing it out i'm like am i supposed to drive get out of the car yes or just
do it out the window as i'm going that's's what I've been doing. That seems dangerous. But some of these very
subtle body language cues have escaped me and many listeners, I'm sure. Babbel's tips and tools
are approachable, accessible, rooted in real life situations, which I have all the time,
and delivered with conversation-based teaching so you're ready to practice what you've learned in the real world studies from yale michigan
state university and others can't feel good to be others there continue to prove babble is better
one study found that using babble for 15 hours is equivalent to a full semester at college. Babbel has over 60 million subscriptions sold.
All of their 14 award-winning language courses are backed by their 20-day money-back guarantee.
Here's a special limited-time deal for our listeners.
Right now, get 55% off your Babbel subscription, but only for our listeners, at babbel.com slash the boys.
Get 55% off at babbel.com slash the boys B-A-B-E-L.com.
B-A-B-B-E-L.
B-A-B-B-E-L.com.
Rules and restrictions may apply.
With Babbel, we can't promise it'll always be easy,
but you'll always be glad you did it.
Kind of like this podcast, except it is easy for me.
Hey, guys.
Rocket Money is a personal finance app that finds and cancels your unwanted subscriptions,
monitors your spending, and helps lower your bills.
You can see all your subscriptions in one place.
And if I see something I don't want, I can cancel it with a tap.
I never have to get on the phone with customer service.
The subscriptions are insidious.
They're the scourge of our modern life.
And you never realize what you're subscribing to or that you're still being charged.
I know that I was about 19 dresses into receiving each one of the 27 dresses from the movie 27 Dresses before I found out much it was costing yes that they intended to send
me by the way you'll this will shock you 54 dresses if i did not cancel and i you know
by like dress 14 15 i think it starts to become clear like these aren't the dresses
oh no they were not from the movie they
didn't resemble anything from the movie they were not they were either way too big or way too small
for a human to wear yeah and one of them was a dressing yeah one of them was it was it was a
vinaigrette it was a raspberry vinaigrette it was a french raspberry vinaigrette. It was a French raspberry vinaigrette dressing.
They'll even try to get you a refund for the last couple months of wasted money
and negotiate to lower your bills for you by up to 20%.
All you have to do is take a picture of your bill,
and Rocket Money takes care of the rest.
They have over 5 million users and have helped save its members
an average of $720 a year with over 500 million dollars in
canceled subscriptions and that was i mean just to be fully transparent that 500 million was
most of that was the the dresses well yeah i mean you're talking about hollywood memorabilia
you're talking about like ornate gowns you know in some cases and so that was uh yeah that was
costing me a lot a lot a lot stop wasting money on things you don't use cancel your unwanted
subscriptions by going to rocketmoney.com slash the boys that's rocketmoney.com slash the boys
rocketmoney.com slash the boys hollywood handbook sean let's go please okay this guy
alright
who's the guy
he's rapping
that's the end of that one
that's where that stops
well you
I mean you
you begin
alright
the guy that's
rapping is dmx 1998 dmx first you don't have to give it you do not have to give a year i know but
i like to that's my favorite version of dmx is 1998 huh that's interesting considering he's the
happiest he's ever been right now and he's growing orchids in a hothouse.
And that you would like him to, you say you liked him better when he was like very, actually very stressed out.
Yeah, he was extremely stressed out.
He was actually pissed.
Very mad. He wanted everyone to get at him, if I remember correctly.
At him, if I remember correctly.
Well, and he was essentially completely beholden to his friend Damien,
with whom he had made something of a devil's bargain.
Yeah, good old Damien.
This guy's not like that. He's rapping.
He's rapping.
This guy, he's in pretty good shape he's okay chance the rapper i don't i mean he's in okay shape he's in good shape this guy's in better
shape than that and yeah chance the rapper like he's not in that good shape
you're crazy if i like if i actually like worked at it i could definitely be in better shape than
that it's true i don't have to i don't have to work that just from like doing my normal activities around like my property
uh-huh
I'll like get into like
it's a lot of
uprooting
stuff and
climbing I have to do a lot of climbing
and that naturally gets me in like
pretty good shape
you're on the like Arnold Schwarzenegger
and commando workout
before before logs around and
shit yeah before he gets to be commando okay so this is a so this is a rapper who you could not
work out a bunch and become as muscular as this guy never that's what you don't and then it's 50
cent um okay is that the same guy is shot is that like his other name is that like his rapping name
yeah yeah curtis jackson no then no no
l l cool j getting warmer that's much warmer is it this guy's rapping
i mean i'll say this about him he's barely ever rapping
it's a jaw rule jaw exceptional shape that's to me further away than ll cool j
getting i would say possibly getting farther away and this is so interesting this is someone who is uh movies and sports i
think a couple times uh-huh and rap movies and sports and rap definitely sports let's go totally
wait definitely sports he's doesn't now movies now definitely sports oh ne's done sports movies. Now definitely. Oh, Nelly.
Let's go Nelly.
Nelly, of course, very famous sports movies.
Star.
But this guy maybe has even done more than that.
More than Nelly?
Yeah.
I don't know.
I'm running out here.
Okay. And now he's running out here. Okay.
And now he's running out of rappers.
That's so interesting.
He's almost out of rappers.
This guy who's like Mr. Rapper.
Okay.
Busta Rhymes.
Not sure I would admit that.
Finding Forrester to me is at a sports movie.
Yes.
Yeah.
Writing is a sport the way I do it
how do you
do it
I'm on a treadmill
why you write
okay
and I'm juggling
I'm not on a treadmill
you're juggling with like one hand or both hands
switching back and forth
I don't know what it like and I'm balancing the sort of pin on my chin Like one hand or both hands? Switching back and forth.
And I'm balancing the sort of pin on my chin.
And I'm doing banter, crowd work.
You're doing a lot of stuff.
Yeah.
What's your setup?
Writer's life.
What's your hashtag writer's life?
Hashtag writer life.
Give me your, what snacks do you need?
What's your setup? I just you're i just sit at in a
chair and type that's all that i do in a chair yeah yeah yeah and the laptop is just like nuking
your privates yeah i have like a lap desk that i bought on amazon okay it's very comfortable it wasn't buster rhymes you know what no this guy's friends with like turtle and e
is it mark walberg yeah that's right
that is correct all right okay moving on to the next question so this is right now right at this exact moment
is the first is the first time i realized there were actual correct answers to this
yes yes i thought you were just sticking with me but now i but now i know there's like a place
there's like a place we can get there's an answer to every single question all right all right that's
what makes it the ultimate sports movies quiz and now i understand let me let me say then about earlier perfect title you nailed
the title this is great thank you great job with the time i'm ready let's go hayes okay who was
who is the little guy the little guy
very little
is Tom Cruise
now
that's wrong
that is that's funny
imagine
this guy imagining Tom
Cruise as little as this guy
I'm like okay losing
it I'm like that's a better movie and he's running
around but this guy's funnier for sure um nastier peter dinklage he's a little more out boom boom
no it's not peter dinklage sean was saying yeah in response to what i was saying i think there's
a little bit of a delay oh yeah and i do just want to clarify so this isn't like clipped i do not think i do think peter dinklage is funny or at
least has the chops i don't think he's nasty he could be his whole his whole thing on game of
thrones was like he was the the like nasty little sex hound he would get nasty with it he would
i watched him i watched him get down and dirty a couple times. So this guy, like, he's, like, funny, man.
And he's, like, the little guy.
And actually, think about, like, man, this guy's funny, dude.
He would just make a great addition to, like, the crew.
Okay, so I have two.
Let me ask one question.
Okay.
Is he funny and like a clown?
I would say no, but I could definitely see him quoting that for sure.
But it's not Joe Pesci?
No.
Okay, then Danny DeVito.
Unfortunately, no.
No. Jesus Christ. Litt Okay, then Danny DeVito. Unfortunately, no. No.
Jesus Christ.
He's friends.
Littler, littler, littler.
You're thinking these guys are all huge compared to this guy.
They hear...
He's friends, very good friends with a guy from a recent answer.
So the quiz builds in this way.
That was the end?
Sean, did we lose you?
I think we lost you.
Did you?
I'm sorry.
He cannot resist. My shit froze up okay so danny to be imagine like danny devito is having a conversation and he hears like
hey buddy like down in front and he turns around and danny devito can't see anything and the guy's
like down here and then you he looks down and there is this guy. Is this a real person or is this like a cartoon?
This is so interesting.
I would say it is neither.
You could definitely be like, I thought for a while that it looks so real.
I really thought it was real.
It's closer, I guess, technically technically to a cartoon but it feels so real
it feels insanely real is it gollum getting close that's closer is it one of the rings i i would say
funnier even than gollum
and the clue i tried to give earlier
uh is that he is actually best friends probably with a guy who was an answer earlier in the quiz
so the quiz builds in this cool way where like it's like helping you learn okay was it sean astin oh we lost sean again no sean asked who is he friends with
he's friends with gollum yeah oh right yeah no gollum is not earlier in the quiz
gollum is just earlier your guess it was earlier today but it was not definitely what happened earlier yeah just a second ago not that
not that not that little he's he's little he's small man and he's friends with a guy
yeah and he's kind of raunchy and kind of wrong
i have no idea where we're where we're where we are right now the answer is ted 2 ted okay oh the bear
from ted 2 yeah all right i got you friends with mark walberg yeah best friends best friends
thunder buddies thunder buddies this is like a very walberg heavy quiz i was not anticipating
that yeah i mean but that's we've only done five questions 40 of the quiz this very walberg heavy quiz i was not anticipating that yeah i mean but that's
we've only done five questions 40 of the quiz is mark walberg related but the total quiz is over 600
questions you should write about you should write about um about And also Ted, too.
I've been sort of waiting around for you to do this,
and I wonder if it's like you're scared or something.
But there's a lot there.
The world's ready.
Yeah.
Okay.
Well, I'll keep that in mind for the next book.
And Tom Brady's in Ted, too.
So, sports and movies again.
Yeah.
Boom.
Tied together. This again. Yeah, boom. Tied together.
This guy, oh, sorry.
Is it me?
Okay, yeah.
So this guy, almost the opposite of the last one.
Man, this dude's big.
He hates Mark Wahlberg.
He's big.
Is it possible that he is enemies with Mark Wahlberg? I's big. Is it possible
that he is enemies with Mark Wahlberg?
I don't think so.
Okay.
But he's big.
He's big and he's not enemies with Mark Wahlberg.
So we can automatically eliminate
John Cena. John Cena's out.
That's correct.
Eliminated. Just feel free to start
eliminating people. Yeah and i find it
helpful we're gonna eliminate also the rock the rock is eliminated okay good good this guy
he's big he's talking in an unusual way if that's okay to say uh unusual to me yeah i think it's
like and part of it is not english here's an interesting thing
about him you look at his name and you're like okay that's definitely not english but then it
is kind of yeah is it arnold schwarzenegger it is not arnold schwarzenegger I would say he's bigger. Arnold Schwarzenegger is at the bar and
this guy's like, hey,
get taller, I guess. In this
case, he wouldn't say down. Up in front.
Yeah, he'd say up in front.
I don't want to see the thing.
And he turns around
and he's looking at this guy's
probably his belly button part.
Is he alive right now?
Oh, you better believe it very much so
so andre the giant is out yeah all right this guy dude you like this guy
okay i like a i like a big potentially not american but possibly american well you're just like okay definitely
not but then like part of his name you're like okay guess so yeah
is this person an actor no could be physically no more than we all are. Yeah. Is he a wrestler?
Could be, but no.
Could be, but that's not what I know him from.
Okay.
Is he a musician?
Could be.
Could be, might be.
Probably is.
That's not how I know him.
Yeah.
Okay.
So then he's in sports and...
Yes.
Yep.
I got to go Tim Duncan. Really, really really really close close oh you're so close much david
robinson much better than either of them he's a better player and he's not american per se
um but big guy and actually from their and probably friends with him from their team but later yes
from their team but later yeah well certainly later than david robinson sometimes i think he's
on the bus even with tim duncan saying hey played for the spurs that That's crazy because there's never been a better
basketball player on the Spurs
than Tim Duncan. They should have given him
a chance.
They didn't give him a chance.
Oh, Boban. No, very
close. What?
Not as big.
No, not that big.
Come on, I said the big guy, not the huge
guy. We went way past
it's a guy who was probably better than tim duncan but tim duncan was famous he moved product
obviously and so they were like he moved product that's what tim duncan is known for that's what
i mean crazy duncan was like a flashy yeah exactly like they had to just for the bottom line they had to put him out
there meanwhile this guy's cleaning up his mess okay yeah not as glamorous but he actually just
put on his freaking hard hat and got his lunch pail and got to work every day i'm like yeah duncan
jacob purdle so close this is so close now i can't believe how close this is. But I have to say, earlier.
Yeah.
Earlier?
Pre-PURTLE.
Pre-PURTLE.
That's how we measure things in San Antonio.
Pre- and post-PURTLE.
Pre- and post-PURTLE, yes.
Yeah.
Terry Cummings, we're going to go way back.
Much later. Just think, who's the proto-purtle
is he is he bigger than tim duncan uh maybe the same big soak similar yeah
maybe the same big yeah i would say he's at the bar tim duncan's at the bar and the guy's like
hey regular in front as tim duncan turns around and they are like okay now we can have a nice
normal conversation no one has to look up down whatever is it lamarcus aldridge
we were closer on the portal lamarcus aldridge i'm like he's from america yeah
but also you hear his name and you're like i don't know aldridge that sounds like something
in england that does sound a little like something in england yeah i wonder if he's
potentially a spy like 21 savage that's that's what i was thinking that was exactly what i was thinking we lost
sean entirely kevin yeah he'll probably pop back on got it here's where i do a really good job
by myself and i approve it what's what's interesting is at this point in the podcast
32 minutes in wow sean is sean is gone but i don't know if he's like really gone
or if this is a bit part of it and he's gonna pop up somewhere um i'll tell you this right now
it is a bit and uh it every everything we do on this show that is bad and sucks and feels like that is all on purpose.
Popped back up.
Hi, Sean.
Sorry.
We figured it out, Sean.
We answered four questions while you were gone.
Yeah.
Turned out you were the guy who was dragging us down.
He got Tiago Splitter.
Like as soon as you left, it was like, boom.
Oh, it's Tiago.
Damn, I would have loved to be around
to see that then he said he was just playing with us and he knew the whole time yeah shit man i hate
to be toyed with like that but i guess it was an honor i was trying to name everybody else from the
2007 championship spurs just to mess with you but then as soon as you left i was like hayes let me
get real with you tiago splitter and hey you could see how pissed you were getting and he was loving it dude what a fucking troll
well there's a reason they call me the march maniac i get maniacal around this time of year
because march mania is happening in DraftKings Sportsbook,
one of America's top rated sportsbook apps, is giving new customers and maniacs like me
a shot to turn five bucks into $150 instantly in bonus bets with any college basketball bet.
Those maniacs are even more maniacal than me, the March maniac. And during
March mania, I get a little maniacal. And let me tell you something. The best bet that I'm seeing
on the board is one that will already have happened by the time you hear this ad. That's
right. I'm here to give you a non-specific line
from a college basketball tournament game,
which you will not be able to bet on
because the college basketball tournament games
that are going to happen after you hear the ad
do not have lines up yet.
I have to give you a line specifically from today.
That's how the lines work.
Today, there are two games taking place, both of which
you will not be allowed to wager on. They will already have happened. San Diego State Aztecs
are favored over Boise State. Oh, mama. Hey, I wonder if their basketball court is blue like
their football field. Sports facts. That's the March Maniac for you. Also, the Dayton, Ohio Flyers, our favorite over VCU.
Hey, you know what?
I'm going to go double underdog on that one because I'm a maniac.
Okay, have fun seeing the games or checking up on the scores of whether I hit my bet that you could not participate in.
Download the DraftKings Sports app and use code THEBOYS.
New customers can bet five bucks to get $150 instantly in bonus bets only at DraftKings
Sportsbook with code THEBOYS. The crown is yours. Gambling problem? Call 1-800-GAMBLER or in West
Virginia, visit www.1800gambler.net. In New York, call 8778-HOPEork or text hope ny 467369 in connecticut help is
available for problem gambling call 888-789-7777 or visit ccpg.org please play responsibly on
behalf of boot hill casino and resort in Kansas, 21 plus age varies by jurisdiction.
Void in Ontario.
Bonus bets expire 168 hours after issuance.
See DKNG.com slash bball for eligibility and deposit restrictions, terms and responsible gaming resources.
Mania!
Life can be ridiculous, but you know what's not funny?
Getting ripped off. harry's agrees
so what we want to talk about today with sorry you said harry's or harry i said harry's we always
talk about harry's first and then we talk about you clean harry uh who are sort of our new
noted mask i don't know mask guy for this campaign.
Talk about Harry's first.
Something funny that
happened to you recently.
A ridiculous or fun situation
that you were in
recently. That's the prompt
and that'll take us into
discussing the product.
How great the product is.
Funny to me or funny to just anyone i
i mean do you you feel like there's a difference there like you yeah i mean i've had things happen
to me that i suppose you would find funny okay but that you didn't find funny and and you have
not really and you have things that have happened that you would find funny but the rest of the
world would not yeah i guess i'm interested in that one that you would find funny but the rest of the world would not. I guess I'm interested in that one.
That I would find funny?
Yes.
But that others
would not find funny.
You seem to think that you have
a specific
taste when it comes
to what's funny or ridiculous that is not.
I ordered
a scented spray for my pillow to help
me sleep at night like a lavender scent okay and uh they they accidentally sent me two
okay so you understand that most people would not buy that funny or ridiculous but but you but you do i just had a
little chuckle about the mix up at the at the shipping uh warehouse harry saw customers getting
screwed over by questionable that's a come up overpriced shaving product harry on the come up
i decided to do something better instead of charging the same stupid high prices harry on the come up i decided to do something better instead of charging the same
stupid high prices harry's found their own way to double scent bottle beautifully designed razors
for a fraction of the price of other big brands except bogo baby exceptional products honest
prices i don't is there a bogo as part of this because i don't want to be like talking about
no but that's what happened that are no but i clean harry punk harry's two bottles buy one get
one their deodorant their lotion their body wash their hair gel all very high quality products they
all smell great german engineer blades made in their own factory they stay sharp longer you get
a five blade razor weighted handle foaming shave, and a travel cover for just three bucks at Harry's.com slash the boys.
Highest customer satisfaction in the shaving industry.
No risk trial.
Don't like your shave.
No worries.
It's on them.
Getting ripped off isn't funny.
Do you want to hear what happened to me that you might find funny?
Yes.
Yes, sure.
But that you didn't.
Yeah.
So you're attuned to this stuff
i got my foot stuck in the dryer at the laundromat and it somehow turned on
and you know that that was something other people would find funny based on
well the responses you were you were getting a lot of people inside that
laundromat seemed to find it pretty humorous
when my leg started spinning around and flipping me over
what happened was i was holding my laundry basket with both hands and i saw oh still a sock left in
the dryer so i stuck my foot and tried to pick it up with my little toesies i wear sandals, punk, and as I'm picking it up, I just sort of tripped, and my foot got wedged in between.
There's like slats in there and stuck inside there, and then I don't know who, somebody pushed the button or what,
but it turned on, and the thing starts flipping over, and I'm flying in circles.
Help, punk.
Help me, you punksks are your clothes staying in the
basket are you going fast no no no i'm wearing all of them by the end of the cycle get started
with a 13 trial set for just three dollars at harry's.com slash the boys that's harry's.com
slash the boys for a three dollar trial set hollywood handbook now this part of the quiz
is called kevin's question and it's kevin spelled uh q u e and this is where kevin uh comes to
ask us a devious question and we all have to answer and now at this point the quiz master becomes the quiz the student okay if you could change one part of space
jam what would it be and why that's not no that's not the way the quiz works at all okay that has
that is completely different from the spirit of the quiz it is uh it's very insulting to the quiz like it's
the completely wrong okay do a different question
um sean has gone again i'm messaging him okay here he is there he is
sean try turning off your camera that'll probably help with the bandwidth on your on the video sean try putting your laptop in the bathtub
like full of water try that i think that's what he was doing sean try throwing your laptop in front of a train like just find
the nearest train and throw your laptop in front of it i don't think that worked either no i don't
think so uh kevin devious now if you come up with a good question i promise not to tell sean about the first question thank you when he comes back okay um which this is a good one which uh sport
seeker actually has a weapon involved okay okay is it fencing
no
I feel like every sport
has a weapon involved if you
are strong enough
yeah
is that the answer
can you hear us Sean
yeah hi Sean so Sean
can I tell you something that happened before
please
Kevin got to ask like his Yeah. Hi, Sean. So, Sean, can I tell you something that happened before? Please.
Kevin got to ask his question, any question that he chose, and he asked, which part of Space Jam would you change, if any?
Which is completely different from the Ultimate Sports and Movies quiz.
Yeah.
And Shay, do you agree that that's that that's what happened
that's actually my favorite question so far thank you so i'm okay answer it ben it's so great so
by all means go ahead and answer it i didn't like when the one when the one guy was in the iron lung
at the near the end of the game i felt bad about that oh yeah no you know i'm talking about it wait
wasn't that danny devito too he was the voice of one he was the voice of the main bad guy yeah
yeah yeah but he wasn't the one in the iron lung no i think it was the old woman if i'm not mistaken
okay the old grandma was no it wasn't the grandma was like a little bird and it was a giant tweety
no i don't know if it was tweety i think it was like his cousin a different little bird and it was a giant tweety no i don't know if it was tweety i think it was like
his cousin a different little bird yeah come on there's like a mexican one that strains
credulity that's not a bird that's a mouse that not a lot of people know no not speedy gonzalez
the mexicans of mouse yeah this is a different one this is a different bird a little mexican bird here's my this is here's
my this is my ultimate history and movie and sports quiz there's a bird
that's okay i can answer that yeah i can answer it yeah it's tweety oh you got it that's it took
you one guess yeah this is harder than it looks, I gotta admit.
I'm gonna watch
this video right now that shows up on YouTube
when I search
for Space Jam Iron Long.
The video is titled Space Jam Injured Bench.
Yeah, that's it.
It's going to show me everyone
who is injured on the bench
and we'll see if this is true.
It's a monster?
The supposed expert.
No, it's a Looney Tunes.
Okay, who's in the iron lung?
It is Tweety Bird.
The little Mexican.
No, that's not Tweety.
It's a different one.
You can't just go on mute to escape this.
What makes him Mexican?
He says, I caramba, when they put him in there.
Kevin, can you hear simpson so does bar
simpson bar simpson's mexican okay it's because i watched the that shit's interesting
work now you got my attention mr serrano we're cracking it open today i can't hear anyone
oh no
falling apart i messed it up because I watched the video
it was worth it to see that
Tweety was in the iron lung
everyone just shut up while I try
to figure this out
I can see people are talking
stop
he can see us he can hear us this is incredible I can see people are talking stop he can see us he can hear us
this is incredible
I can hear you now
you can hear us?
yeah what happened?
I put my video back on
Kevin was going to get mad
okay Kevin
I won't do any more videos
he's popping it back on
no Sean okay but if you lag that's your fault Kevin. I won't do any more videos. He's popping it back on.
No, Sean.
Okay, but if you lag,
that's your fault.
Yeah, okay. Okay, Sean, is there any more of the Ultimate Sports and Movies
quiz and rap
that we want to do? There probably is, but I, you know,
I kind of left the quiz
in the other room that I had to move out of
because I had bad internet. In the bathroom?
Yeah.
Well, Shay,
I just want to say
that you honor me by taking the quiz
and by doing such a good job.
And just the fact that you survived
and actually appear to be stronger
and healthier and younger
than when you started is a testament to your
bravery and knowledge well i thank you shea one question that i had if it was possible
because you're involved with some of these bigger networks and podcast entities entities is it possible by any chance to have someone steal our show we don't want to do it
anymore we don't first of all the publicity we would get by having anyone else do the show would
be huge really good for the show obviously good for us because we would be set free ultimately from Kevin's
wicked cage.
Okay.
So if you could just run that up the ladder somehow.
I will.
I'm going to,
I'm going to text him.
I'll text Bill right now and ask him if I can take the ultimate sports quiz
and rap podcast.
And this is a pretty good fit.'s gonna be a you have to admit it's great it's a great bit it's a natural pairing
unlike having us do it which obviously you sniffed out we don't know you know what's going on shay uh are people allowed to read your books in uh than the pandemic i would prefer that they
didn't but that's what i was gonna suggest it seems unsafe yeah if you're going to then
go nuts just google shay serrano and then some books will come up and then just start grabbing shit. That would be great.
Our listeners are not going to know where the words end and begin in your name.
So just saying like Google, you have to be much more detailed than that to help them through this process.
All right.
So you go to Google,
where we're familiar with Google.
They can get there, yes.
Okay.
And then on your keyboard,
it looks almost like an eight,
but it's unfinished.
Yep.
Hit that.
I see it.
And then there's one that looks like
a piece of a railroad track uh-huh
hit that i see it and then there's one that looks like the key a keyboard like keys on the keyboard
give me a second only like two of them or found it or like boobs on a robot like robot boobs yes
okay okay that one that one's faster and then there's one that looks like a little, like a house, like a little hat or a house.
Seeing it.
And you hit that.
And then there's like a big bar in the middle that, I mean, at the bottom that doesn't have
any letters or markings on it.
Where?
You hit that.
On mine, it's different.
Oh, no, I have it.
You have it.
Yeah.
And then you're back to the, like, the, almost the eight. Uh-huh. The snake. You hit that. Then you're back to the like the the almost the eight uh-huh the snake
you hit that then you're back to the robot boobs hit that yeah right now this is a robot boobs
right next door to the robot boobs i don't have to describe it but it's right next door
to the right you just tap that twice okay back to the little house it would effectively be the robot's rib cage or
yeah if you're looking at it from like well no that would be like unless the boobs robot boobs
are upside down then it would be going the opposite direction anyway then you're back to
the little house or the little hat and then we have what looks like a zigzag if you're starting
at the bottom up i'm seeing a. I'm seeing too many of these.
Just pick any one of them because if you get
80% of this right,
I'm worried if it's too broad, people will just get discouraged
and quit.
Then there's a circle or like a face,
like a head with no face in it.
Okay, I see two of those.
Yeah, pick any one of those.
They're near each other.
Anyone is okay? Anyone is fine and then you're
good and then you're good then it'll pop up you have your hacker name is shady serrano but the
o is a zero so that'll yeah that'll come up anyway you'll find me on the dark web a lot of people
don't know this but if you hit zero instead of o it accesses me on the dark web. Bye!