Hollywood Handbook - Showrunners Panel, Our Major Discussion
Episode Date: April 15, 2019The Boys team up with fellow showrunners JARRAD PAUL and JULIUS “GOLDY” SHARPE for a panel about becoming each other’s agents. This episode is sponsored by Brilliant Earth ( www.brillia...ntearth.com/THEBOYS ), NHTSA, Harry's ( www.harrys.com/HANDBOOK ), Robinhood ( www.handbook.robinhood.com ), and Philo ( www.philo.tv/THEBOYS ).See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.
Transcript
Discussion (0)
this is a head gum podcast
so it's me and i'm in there with um sneaky pete and uh it's me and it's Sneaky Pete and it's... I love Sneaky Pete's story. It's... Yes.
Gio.
Sneaky Pete and Cromo and Pippa.
Pippa.
Middleton.
And we're making a flag.
I mean, we're starting on country flag first.
And it's not going well.
Square.
Well.
Yeah.
Now you're basically here with us. Yeah.
Because I'm going, everybody else flags, basically.
Almost.
Square light.
Do me, remind me again.
Every square is a.
Rectangle.
But every. Rectangle is a. Shape. Mm-hmm. Every square is a... Rectangle. But every...
Rectangle is a...
Shape.
Square.
Yeah.
So, I'm going, let's make the flag, like, fucked up.
Right.
Curly cues.
Mm-hmm.
You know what I mean?
Yes.
Make it look like an animal.
Yes.
What if it's an animal?
Uh-huh.
Curly cues.
Curly cues.
Well, because it could be... Like a monster, like how you're always drawing monsters well yeah i'm always creating creatures well i'm
a little bit like um who's spooky director uh um tim burton yes my mind is a portal to a fantasy world where creatures reign supreme and could grab you, eat you, anything.
I'm sorry, is there a more interesting story on your phone?
What's on the phone?
Oh, I thought this was part of the I'm not supposed to pay attention to and then you kind of asked me questions.
Well, he's talking about how his mind is a freaking fantasy world full of creatures and monsters.
It's like...
You may want to know this. about how his mind is a freaking fantasy world full of creatures and monsters it's like you may
not you may want to know this and you are and you supposedly are part of a creative field and you
supposedly have to use your imagination that doesn't connect for you at all you're supposed
to be listening to this part yes okay god when we throw to you yes you immediately must be ready
yeah yeah no i'm i'm ready we're not gonna have dead, yeah. No, I'm ready when you throw to me. We're not going to have dead air on the fucking show.
I'm ready when you throw to me.
Yeah.
And this is all sort of in response.
We are trying to get it right this time
because you, of course, did the show three years ago, supposedly.
Yes.
The tree falls in the forest and does brutal numbers.
Interesting.
Did anybody ever do the podcast?
Interesting.
You know what I mean?
Right.
That old Zen Cohen. Got it, got. That old Zen Cohen. Got it.
Zenzy Cohen.
Got it.
Are you suggesting to me that my
episode of your podcast... Please don't blow
by Zenzy Cohen.
Was low
rated? Was that
the... Rated is
a strong word. What was
the strong word? Rated. I would say... We don't necessarily say rated. Lowly rated is a little too right what was the strong word rated rated i would say
you don't necessarily say lowly rated is a little too high i would say it was highly
so what not listen to so yeah that's right so what happens there you you you guys get you guys
we get sat down you got sat down yes what's that meeting we get called in right guys yeah
can i uh guys do you for just a minute can we we just have a quick conversation? We brought you in here because we thought you knew more famous people.
Yes.
And so we're like, this is like episode.
We're not bringing Jared in for like episode freaking two.
Right.
This is in like the 150s.
Right.
It should be okay.
We should get one of these.
Right.
Right.
But it turns out the other ones are also not doing well.
You still got in trouble.
Yes.
Got it.
Yeah. It's interesting.
You would think it would be less dramatic for an episode to crater, numbers-wise,
because the show itself was not doing great in the first place,
but it actually made them even more pissed.
Interesting.
Bringing down a low average.
What's the solution?
And this is Hollywood Handbook.
If you're listening to this, of course, you already know that.
Insider's Guide.
You're not coming for Jared.
Insider's Guide.
It's Hollywood Handbook.
Yes.
Jared Paul is back.
Jared Paul's here.
And we have, as part of the negotiation to bring Jared back, we, of course, needed a
second guest.
You will not approve us doing a show with just Jared again.
Of course. In order to
sort of buoy the numbers, we have
author, comedian,
provocateur,
Julius Goldie Schultz.
And this
does it. And we're throwing to
Goldie now. But this adds to the...
And what we just did was introduce Goldie,
so he'll talk. Throw it a go.
And I would say it does add...
And your question's after.
What's the follower count these days?
Oh, it's going down.
Okay.
But it's only 159,000.
159,000.
And Jared, you are...
It's going down, down, baby.
Mid-20s.
159,000.
Well, on Twitter, right?
Yes.
No one goes on Twitter anymore.
Do they?
That's certainly clear for your feed.
That's definitely the truth.
I don't realize that,
I don't think Twitter is a thing in our culture, is it?
I still don't feel as though I've been properly introduced.
Yeah, yes, I think that's true.
Okay, you left off on provocateur.
Provocateur.
Enfanté.
Yeah.
I said author.
Right.
I said comedian. Sure. I sure i said wrote a book that's right show i guess
showrunner under book writer yeah right but i was brought here i thought this was gonna be a panel
where i was showrunners panel right and then we should do that let's do that it's a podcast
showrunners panel and now there's no audience you thought it was Paley Fest
yeah
but if it's a showrunners panel
Sean
I'm not sure
I host this show
what's that?
I host this show
is it running
effectively running
oh so this is the show
that you run
yeah
oh interesting
okay cool
alright
I'm a showrunner
for Hollywood Handbook
the podcast
oh great
how's that
how's that
not good how's that? Not good.
How's that working out?
Not good.
No?
Not good.
Last year was another down year for us.
Oh.
It's just hard to really sell my followers
that this is what they should be doing now.
For me to leverage my brand in this way
already seems like it may be damaging.
I appreciate the implication that
you are going to tweet about this well i mean it's in the drafts whether it gets already in
the drafts okay wow is there a bit like are you doing like a little bit as part of the promotion
or just straight up self-deprecating are we the target or are you the target of the tweet i think
it might just be a casual like hey hey, guys, check it out.
I did this, but maybe like a month after the fact.
That would be a little second bump for us.
A little lead time.
It would be great.
That would be really nice.
Jared, I'm looking at your most recent non-reply post, Twitter post.
Okay.
non-reply post,
Twitter post,
and I'm seeing zero retweets or likes
and one reply that is negative.
Okay.
When you say that you don't think
Twitter is a thing, are you more
exclusively going off Instagram?
Because I'll look up your...
I really don't partake
in the social media of it all
okay and if i i used to you you guys know that you built this show off of it uh
um i i you know i do it as a as a you know yeah i i don't when inspiration strikes when
inspiration strikes i you know but here's the thing about me.
And you guys are all about followers.
Who's following your posts.
I do my posts for one person.
And that's me.
So I did go to your Instagram.
Do you know what I'm saying?
I know that you're talking. I'm just saying, this post that you're going to read, it's's me. Yeah. So I did go to your Instagram. Do you know what I'm saying? I know that you're talking.
I'm just saying, this post that you're going to read, it's for me.
It's not for anyone else.
So I did go to Instagram.
And they seem to understand that.
Oh, no, they do.
And that's part of.
You guys are on the same page.
Yeah, that's part of.
My audience knows it.
So they don't like things on purpose.
And this isn't about likes, but you're being modest.
Because it's not just for you. because there is a comment on this post.
And it says, Jared, I work for Eddie and absolutely adore your mom.
This is a great follower.
This is a great response on my – I always thought Eddie was just bragging out of sentimental obligation but
damn dude i am legit excited to check out your work as a friend of theirs i'm already proud of
you you go not glenn coco oh yeah so comedy fan yeah and also a fan of your mom. Yes, a big fan of my mom.
So when you say it's just for you, that's sort of rude then to the Shaininator who left this comment.
It's just for me and it's for those people.
It's for Eddie's friends.
It's for my mom's friends.
Can we return to, this is, of course, a showrunner's panel. We do want to return to Goldie, who has a book.
That's right.
Do you want to hold it up?
Yeah, so people can see it.
It's called So You're Going Bald.
It's the first ever manual for the 40 million bald and balding men in the United States, of which I am one.
I notice I'm the only one here bald.
Jerry's wearing a hat.
He's,
I've seen,
he's,
I would kill for what he has.
It was suggested that I wear a hat by some people online when we did the,
like one live feed episode where they had a camera angle at the top of my
head.
Yeah.
Did anyone suggest that I should get a hat?
That hasn't come up my head. Yeah. Did anyone say they love your mom?
That hasn't come up at present.
Okay.
But I am ready for it.
A lot of the comments I'm getting on my thing are from direct fans of my shit
and not necessarily from people who work with a friend of my mom.
It seems like the book would be a great gift for...
Bald.
Like a funny dad.
Dads. It seems like the book would be a great gift for a funny dad.
If your dad comes to you for reading material for toilet stuff, it's just perfect.
The chapters are short.
There's not a word longer than three syllables in the whole thing.
It's in the humor section at Barnes & Noble?
Well, it's in the new releases. Okay. But it's got designs on the humor section at Barnes & Noble? Well, it's in the new releases, so like...
Okay.
It's with things like that.
But it's got designs on the humor section.
Pre-Baharira.
It's with him.
He and I are both new authors.
Your book is next to Pre-Baharira.
That's right.
And we're both held in similar esteem throughout the country.
Wow.
Yeah, we're both authors.
Does it offer advice to those losing their hair at a younger?
A ton.
Yeah.
Well, I got a toupee.
I discussed that.
Yeah, right.
How old were you when you started losing your?
I mean, if you'd even made it to chapter two of the book, there's a chapter called I Went Bald on 9-11.
Got it.
So, you know, my birthday is publicly available information and people can calculate.
So the book is available now for
people to read I didn't realize that
yeah I mean they could go into a store
I could go into a store
and just buy the book and read it
next to the giant Preet Baharira
display got it I didn't realize that
I thought you were bringing it here
I brought it here because I
figured I would gift it to whoever was
nicest to me on this podcast.
I already have one.
Right.
That was a desperate move on my part after you cornered me at Trader Joe's.
Just came through the mail slot one day.
That's right.
It was $5 on your stoop also, which I deposited in the mail slot.
That was for you to pay for the book.
We have to do showrunner panel.
We must. We are
at an inflection point in this industry.
We are deciding
the future of
being a writer.
At this moment, we are
deciding.
We all
fired our agents. Everyone
had to, we all
in this room, stand with the WGA with some reservations.
Yes.
Where do we go from here?
None of us changing our profile picture necessarily.
It's tonight at midnight, is it not?
I think it was last night.
It was last night at midnight.
Oh, it was last night.
Oh, anyway.
And the timing's not necessarily important.
Well, I was gathering that letter together.
I didn't realize.
The one, the form letter? Yeah, that form letter just fired my eyes. You're gathering it together. It's only one page. Well, I was gathering that letter together. I didn't realize. The form letter?
Yeah, that form letter just fired my eyes.
You're gathering it together? It's only one page.
Yeah, but I was gathering it together.
I was gathering it together.
I was trying to think of the perfect PS
for the letter.
Like PS, happy birthday.
PS.
Something nice.
Take the stains out. Because we're all people. happy birthday PS right you know something nice right take the stings
out and they'll you know
because we're all people right
imagine getting that letter and having
no PS and it's like did
the previous 15 years happen
yeah
it is crazy to think about
and for my agent to get a letter from me is unusual.
We don't usually send letters, do we guys?
No, no.
That's something I don't think people realize,
that it's going to be weird to get a letter from me.
I don't even know if they are looking for,
are they checking their mailbox?
Well, I feel like now.
I don't know if they get my correspondence at all.
A good gift for any agent would be a letter opener.
Yeah, yes.
Because most people don't tend to have those younger people
in their 30s, alpha types.
And it's like, here's a monogrammed letter opener
because you're going to be opening these letters.
And could it look like a fun sword or something like that, Goldie?
Sure, yeah.
Yeah.
Now this show is, of course, a UTA package.
This is existing business.
This is all...
This will continue to function as always.
This show has been a UTA package.
It has all the trademarks of a UTA package.
We've got all the moves, obviously.
And we've said this on an episode that isn't released yet,
but if you think that you can make a show of this quality
without the stewardship of Susie Fox, et cetera,
good luck to you.
I would like to see that.
I haven't seen it yet.
Yeah.
That would be nice.
Yeah.
You mean without the package?
Without the package.
Right.
Well, that's the brave new world.
Without the steady hand at the till.
Well, I think what the WGA is suggesting is that Suzy Fox could do this without the package.
She could do the show, this show.
She could put together this show without the package and just take 10% from everybody.
That's what the argument is, I think.
Okay, let me back up.
So she's doing, she's planning one of her marquee clients, Hayes Davenport.
Thank you for using my agent.
Right.
I don't know my agent's name.
I don't know my agent's name.
Okay.
She's planning one of her marquee clients, Hayes Davenport, into this show.
Yeah.
And she gets what?
Just 10% of the dough?
10%.
I don't know.
It doesn't seem like a big enough piece of the pie.
I hear you.
Especially since there is no pie.
No, there is a pie.
It's just instead it is the same pie as last year got it
yeah yeah yeah what does the agreement say about podcasts the 40 year old agreement that ran out
last night yeah what yeah where it must have some stipulation see this is what i'm worried about now
that we're opening this up,
that podcasts are going to start getting in on this.
No one anticipated podcasts.
It's kind of blown up the whole business model
that you guys are making so much from this.
The Flavor Ones is making everyone shiver in their boots.
Right.
There's so much podcast money,
and it's like, how do we divide this in an equitable way?
It's a great problem to have.
Oh, sure.
First world problems, hashtag.
Right.
I don't have the solution.
You guys are looking at me like I came in with a way.
Oh, you're just asking the question?
You know, my followers will probably start tweeting out
really creative solutions that we could then read
on a later, more highly rated podcast
once it gets around that this was what we're doing.
If you said that.
That we then took the followers' feedback.
We then amplified the followers' feedback so they in turn became signal boosters and
could maybe host their own.
And they get followers.
That's right.
And this power of virality that creates more and more pie.
It's a pie factory.
And then how do we split it?
We don't know. I can't even imagine how
enraged
my followers are
going to get from this. Well, it's not about
you yet again. And imagine if they
since they will soon be
having a conversation in person with your mom
they could even tell her.
They're going to tell Eddie.
Yeah.
At which point, I'm not safe. I don't feel safe. Who knows what Eddie's going to tell Eddie. Yeah. At which point, I'm not safe.
I don't feel safe.
Who knows what Eddie's going to do?
Yeah.
Eddie's potentially unstable.
Yeah.
We have to navigate this brave new world.
We do need agents to...
In the interim.
I'm not going to receive a phone call offering myself a job.
I'm certainly not.
I'm not in the business of doing that.
I need someone else to take that call for me and then tell me
about it. So,
we, this is the plan,
we all have to help each other. We have to hold each
other up now. And this is,
it's not just a guild and
a shared industry where a part of it
is a brotherhood and
increasingly a sisterhood.
So, we need to
support each other and become each other's agents.
Yes.
And so I would like to pitch myself to be one of your agents.
I opt out of that.
You haven't heard my-
Oh, I haven't heard the thing.
Okay.
I have my attorney who's handling everything, so I'll listen to it, but I can't guarantee
that I'm really not going to act on it today.
I'm willing to sign the code of conduct and let me say what I will do. Okay. Every 18 weeks, I will call you. Hey, how's it going, buddy? Just checking in.
It's fine.
I think this works. All right, all right. Well, we're tracking some stuff for you right now.
Just wanted to keep you posted.
Have you heard of this show Banana Man?
I don't watch anything because I actually work in this industry.
All right, well, you wouldn't be watching this.
It's coming up.
HBO is trying to develop it with Diablo Cody and Will Ferrell.
It is animated, right?
It's animated, and it sucks.
So what I'm going to do is, if you're cool,
I'm going to submit you for this.
And I was wondering, do you have a script you want me to send or anything?
I don't have anything on file here.
I'm so confident in everything I've done.
Just send my resume.
And, you know, Making History will be on that.
Cristella will be on that.
The Late Late Show.
The Grinder will be on that.
I don't know.
Does it just say The Late Late Show or does it say the Late Late Show with Craig Kilborn?
I mean, you are sort of obligated to write out the whole thing.
I write the Late Late Show with Craig Kilborn, then I write the Late Late Show with Craig
Ferguson, parentheses, fired.
Fired.
I got fired in Scottish.
Fired by Craig personally, though.
Oh, no. Oh, okay. personally, though. Oh, no.
Okay, that's stupid.
Yeah, no.
Did they send that down the chain?
Yeah.
And, you know, it stings as bad as it did.
But as my new agent, I feel like maybe you can call them up and let them know I was really offended by that.
Well, we haven't figured out who is whose agent.
So, like, Sean just being—
Well, that's why I was just pitching myself to go,
hey, does anybody want to take me up on this?
Then maybe I go agent hunting.
Let's see how you do with the late, late show thing
where you tell them how unhappy I am.
And then if that works,
I'll look into Banana Man, certainly.
Yeah.
And now I am just like-
I can't stress enough.
I just have really a drawing to go off of here and i can send you it's a rough
drawing i think there is a newer version of the drawing wait is this like that johnny bananas
drawing they had on entourage is it is it that good no uh but i think there is a newer version
i have the original one it's rough uh but you can get a sense of what they're going for.
And it sucks.
The drawing also got wet.
The drawing, I was, and it's my fault, I put a sprite down on it, and I did knock the sprite over.
So is Diablo going to be day-to-day on this, or is this just she supervising me?
She's not involved.
Am I supervising her?
She is not.
She dropped out.
Oh.
Yeah, I just got emailed.
I'm a little more interested.
She's out.
And Will's out as well.
Okay.
I'm still interested.
All right, I'll forward you the drawing and just get back to me.
Yeah, I do have a personal connection with craig ferguson i can run it by him
perfect uh so i'll be i guess i'm gonna be goldie's agent i don't appreciate that just
being like decided that's because you like got out of the phone and offered him a job i do want
to know what the terms of this deal are. First of all, does your agent,
like,
is the book a separate thing?
Yeah.
I retain all rights to the book,
which are very,
potentially very,
very,
very lucrative.
That's old business.
That's old business. But not,
but not if it gets optioned.
Has it been optioned yet?
It hasn't been optioned,
but there's been a lot of interest from a lot.
Sequel to Wild Hogs,
Bald Hogs.
We weren't supposed to talk about that
and i thought that was clear interesting on the text chain but you don't want to okay you don't
want to talk about bald hogs i don't have an agent so bald hogs bald right we can sell that quickly
no it is being sold quickly but i don't have an agent to create the bidding war for Bald Hogs that obviously it deserves.
Wow, managers can...
I don't have a manager.
Oh, well, that's the...
Right, I have a book and the idea of Bald Hogs and maybe a gig on Banana Man that's pending.
You want me to put in a call to Tobolowsky? I also represent him.
He was in Wild Hogs, so he knows the landscape. He's a bald hog.
Yeah, and he was in
Groundhog's Day. He was one of the
groundhogs, and he is a bald.
So he was effectively a bald hog.
He is very bald. Before this goes anywhere,
I am, to my understanding
as my agent, first position on Banana Man.
So I don't know that I can carve out
bald hogs.
We'll cross that bridge when we come to it.
Okay.
But if I am providing Steve for the project as well,
I do not just want the traditional 10%.
I'm bringing so much at this point that I do think I am an active producer.
Well, it's becoming sort of.
This is where it gets a little sketchy.
What are you talking about?
This is where I feel like it goes into weirdness, no?
In what way?
Well, you did bring Steve.
I mean, I would call that like a package or something where it's like the elements.
Yeah, it's a packageable element.
Right.
And you take a fee?
Well, it's going to be an offload of your commission.
I mean, obviously, he's going to be acting in it as well.
I mean, I would talk to the studio.
But honestly, you know, so if you you gave What if you didn't take commission
And you just took a fee
Okay
Separately
Well that's good for me
Well that's good for you
Because you're not having to pay me
That is good for you
Right
So you just take a fee from the studio
Yeah shit
I mean the studio's paying me
Instead of you
And all that happens is like
What's wrong with that?
Is like the budget is less
Good man
So it's worse
Like that's a problem for me Oh yeah It's already so bad It's already so bad It's already so bad It's already so bad It's already so bad It's already so bad It's already so bad It's already so bad It's already so bad It's already so bad It's already so bad It's already so bad It's already so bad It's already so bad It's already so bad It's already so bad It's already so bad It's already so bad It's already so bad It's already so bad It's already so bad It's already so bad It's already so bad It's already so bad It's already so bad It's already so bad It's already so bad It's already so bad It's already so bad it's worse? Like that's a problem for me?
It's already so bad.
It's already so bad.
It's not going to go on screen.
Who cares?
Like I'm supposed to care
how good it is?
Yeah.
In this scenario?
Well it already sucks shit.
But I don't own it.
So like I'm supposed
to care how good
something I don't own is?
I mean it's borderline
banana man territory.
So one thing we should
point out is that
one of the wild hogs
is William H. Macy
so the movie will have
to be filmed in jail.
But the hogs, their mischief could easily land on them.
Oh, God, yeah.
Are you kidding?
It's amazing that they spent the first movies out of jail.
How'd you get here?
You have to.
How'd you get, what was his character's name?
Bill.
How'd you get here, Bill?
In the fiction of the show show it does have to be
riding a motorcycle
well his character was like a
computery guy so it's like I hacked
into the system
he becomes really tough and stuff
I think he punches out a guy
he beats up all those del fuegos
and then the retribution
for the del fuegos
not letting them have a drink there is like they get their bar blown up and their bikes destroyed.
And we're supposed to be on the other guy's side.
Jared?
Yeah.
Would you like to be my agent?
Would you like to be agent with me?
I was just honestly thinking about I had a meeting about Wild Hogs 2 and I was trying to figure out the take on it.
Ah, yes.
What was your angle?
I forget what it was, but they came back together somehow,
and I forget.
I mean, maybe they calmed down.
Maybe.
Maybe they just said, you know what, guys?
I don't want to be wild anymore.
You want Jared to be your agent.
I don't know.
I think he knows a lot of people.
If he could get me in touch with Eddie.
And Eddie's friend?
Me, Eddie, and his mom are breaking bread together.
Right.
Cooking up ideas.
Throwing it against the wall, seeing what sticks.
Yeah.
All of a sudden, you know.
You never know.
That sounds like the kind of familial environment I've been looking to find in this business.
Sounds grounded.
Because showbiz is a surrogate family for me. Here's the thing.
Eddie Steinfeld
is looking to get into
producing. Okay, I see.
Okay. I see the show.
You know, he knows
nothing about producing. The show could be called
Steinfeld. Steinfeld is looking
to get into producing.
And, you know, yeah, I could
put in a good word and say
here's a guy.
Hasn't done much. No.
He has a
you know, podcast.
Podcast.
And an idea.
Yeah, well, sure. Ish.
Okay. And he could pitch it to you.
Now, Eddie won't know what a pitch is.
And that's not, I'm not about the.
But that's okay.
We can explain it to him.
It's not a vocab for me.
We tell Eddie it's the idea for the show.
And he goes, okay, what's a show?
Well, Eddie understands the power of holding all the cards.
Oh, absolutely.
Which he is.
Absolutely.
Because Sean is pitching him. Yeah., absolutely. Right, which he is. Absolutely. Because Sean is pitching him.
Yeah.
So Eddie, you get a better impress Eddie who doesn't know what a pitch is.
Yeah.
So you have to, within the pitch, and you can't go in going,
Eddie, you don't know what a pitch is.
You're a fucking idiot.
You have to make him think he knows what a pitch is.
Yeah.
And then make him think it was his idea.
Then give him the pitch knowing he holds all the cards and get the right decision.
And you also have to fly to where does he live? Somewhere else. Santa Barbara.
Oh, okay.
It's not even a flight. It's really nice.
It's got a great spot there.
Oh, beautiful, beautiful.
Yeah. Oyster.
What? Oyster. Yeah.
I mean. Eddie likes oysters?
Yeah, yeah. Good. I think so. I don't know much about what he likes. That's the thing. I mean. Eddie likes oysters? Yeah, yeah.
Good.
I think so.
I don't know much about what he likes.
That's the thing.
I don't know if he's the right producer for you.
But he's a producer.
Yeah, it's one option that's out there.
And you have a direct connection to him.
I have a very direct connection with him on my social media, as you saw.
Yeah.
So that's perfect for me.
Yeah.
And my agent now is really doing some work.
Yeah.
Jared, I'm exploring becoming your agent.
Oh, okay.
What do we have going on?
Wow, I love seeing this.
What do we have going on?
Yeah.
Oh, God.
If you don't know that answer, I don't know if I want you to be my agent.
Or do you?
It's weird when my agent goes,
what do you have going on?
Well, I mean, I'm exploring a relationship
and also giving you the opportunity
to plug your fucking show.
Right.
But it would have been nice if you said,
I love your show.
I love what's going on.
I love what you have going on.
I want to be your agent.
It's his first day. I'm just happy to move on. It is his you have going on. I want to be your agent.
It's his first day.
I'm just happy to move on.
It is his first day doing this. I'm so sorry.
And I think we should skip the whole subject and just move on to Goldie.
Okay, so Jared is your Sean's agent.
And I'm Goldie's agent.
You're Goldie's agent.
Here's my question to you.
Can I ask a question?
What would you do for me as my agent?
Okay.
Wow.
I should have asked this.
Your acting work.
Yes?
No.
This is what I'm saying.
What would you do?
We're giving up.
What would you do?
Well, you play a creepy pervert in your own show, right?
I do play a creepy pervert in my own show.
First order of business.
Do you have any creepy pervert in your own show, right? I do play a creepy pervert in my own show. First order of business. Do you have any creepy pervert stuff?
Can Hayes get you that gig, and you should be commissioning as his agent when he appears on his show?
That's an additional revenue stream that I feel you owe to Hayes if he's your agent.
Interesting.
When he's appearing on his own show.
Right.
It's almost like a way for you to generate a pie like we were talking about earlier.
Right.
You send him out in the world to create these things, 10%.
Put him on these things, another 10%.
I know, but then I feel like I'm—
Put him on a wig, another different character, another 10%.
How would you sell me?
I want to hear the sale.
Okay.
You're on the phone.
Can we do this?
Do we have time for this?
I've got all the time in the world for this. Your career is so important to me. Okay. You're on the phone. Can we do this? Do we have time for this? I've got all the time in the world for this.
Your career is so important to me.
Okay.
He's on the phone with, let's say, Thorne.
He's on the phone with Thorne.
Michael Thorne.
Michael Thorne.
Michael Thorne.
Runs Fox.
Runs Fox.
Right?
Yes.
Which is maybe still doing shows. Right.ne. Runs Fox. Runs Fox. Right? Yes. Which is maybe still doing shows.
Right.
Maybe.
We'll see.
That could be huge.
So you're on the phone with Michael Thorne.
What do you say?
Okay.
You know Rick Glassman, the guy, he was one of the guys in Undateable.
He's one of the Undateable guys.
He wore glasses.
Right. Rick Glassman. Yeah. one of the Undateable guys. He wore glasses. Right.
Rick Glassesman.
Yeah.
Oh, right, right, yeah.
It was him, Funchess.
Yeah.
D'Elia, of course.
Yeah.
Brent Morin.
Brent Morin.
Yeah.
But the one I'm thinking of is Rick Glassman.
Okay, Rick Glassman, yeah.
Just add about a gallon of water to Rick Glassman's energy. Just water
it down. Water it down. With like about
a gallon. Yeah.
Glassman half full.
Yes. Yeah.
Yeah. And I give you
Jared Ball. You're telling me
that Jared, that
If Rick Glassman got caught
in like a hurricane. You're telling me that I'm a half glass Rick Glassman? I tell, that. So it's if Rick Glassman got caught in like a hurricane.
You're telling me that I'm a half glass Rick Glassman?
I tell, yes.
If you took the glass of water, the glass of really like hot, cold, hot cold brew, which is effectively coffee.
Yeah.
That is Rick Glassman.
Right.
A little too strong for some people.
A little too strong.
For some shows. Right. especially like network now you know he's more of a cable energy and that's part of why undateable didn't work you're taking what's the only reason a gallon of water and adding it
to a cup of coffee but are we saying he's dateable yeah and so this is the thing he's a little more
this is someone that you can bring home to his own mob.
Well,
because you don't feel like shit when you're watching him.
You go like,
yeah,
he's doing that.
I must be doing all right.
Yeah.
But I,
but I think it's,
I'm not sure Thorne buys this.
But if Rick Glassman,
I think you're onto something,
but I think it's like,
if Rick Glassman went through some sort of tragedy,
I don't know what it is,
a natural disaster, but something.
Yeah.
Like a hurricane.
Like a hurricane, but just to bring it back to my last show.
And your guys.
So this is going to be your last show.
I've heard rumors about this.
Accusing the show of not getting listeners.
Is it because we talk about Rick Glassman?
Oh, I thought you were talking about Huge in France being your last show.
No, no, no.
Do you not know that people are saying that?
Is Rick Glassman the problem?
In terms of?
In terms of the ratings from,
you know what I mean, this show, last show?
You think people are not tuning in,
like they're not pressing the download.
But I also told you I'm bringing the followers.
So why are we stressing over Rick Glassman?
He may have followers who are now by this point really intrigued
because the amount of Rick Glassman content, you know,
in the podcast world, as far as I know, and I'm just,
this is so fresh to me.
It all came as a surprise.
This is where this is going again.
I thought it was a panel.
Showrunner's panel. Right. to me it all came as a surprise this is where this is going again i thought it was a panel um right so so for now this is like just a gold mine for all the undateable fans right right that's
been off the air now and and they they're craving the content and i think this is part of the pitch
to michael thorne right is that there were these fans of undateable who we discovered through this
podcast because rick glassman's name came up
in reference to Jared Paul,
who can now bring you this cheaper version of Rick Glassman
without all the baggage of Rick Glassman.
Way cheaper, yeah.
Which was legendary.
That's a pitch.
Right, which is why I...
That's an agent.
And that's a pitch.
And Goldie has now become Jared's agent
yeah
okay
that was a competitive
situation
so I
am the person
in this room
who doesn't have
an agent
well cause I'm
Goldie's agent
and Goldie's
Jared's agent
no I've just
I've done the
I've done the math
and so
so I think
what's happening
is here is
I am your agent
Hayes.
But Jerry, you're also Sean's agent.
You're my agent.
When did I say that? I'm feeling underrepresented in that situation.
I said I was Sean's agent.
Where only Sean is representing you?
Well, if he has two agents, then I feel like maybe I need a manager.
No, he does not have two agents.
He is being two agents.
Which now it's feeling like you're spread a little thin.
He has two clients, me and Sean.
I didn't realize I was your agent already.
I was?
Yeah, I can't have you representing both sides of this podcast deal.
Right, okay.
Yeah, you're going to be negotiating against yourself.
Right.
I'd like to pitch myself to Thorne.
Okay.
To be his agent?
Right.
Because it's like he needs some sort of filter as to what gets to him,
because it's like obviously this Glassman Light thing is a high-quality thing
that needs to cut through the noise.
And I'm concerned that due to the newness of our business that we might not be taken seriously.
And do you understand what I'm saying?
It's a way to get prioritized due to the quality.
People don't recognize our brand, so they don't realize how high-quality our stuff is.
our brand. So they don't realize how high quality our stuff is. And so for Michael Thorne, like to make this decision, he needs someone on his side who's looking at the whole landscape to go,
this is a cool new thing that's about to take off. You can be in on it. You know, let me set you up.
And you want people to say that about you.
Right. Because I'm bringing high quality material and I'm not quite known enough to be on his radar as an agent yet.
But if I'm the writer, the showrunner who became an agent,
I think that's a really compelling pitch.
Now, I just want to double back to Jared feeling like
bringing up Rick Glassman was an issue with the show
when he brought up Michael Thorne.
Uh-huh.
Michael Thorne. What-huh. Michael Thorne.
What's the thinking here?
Michael Thorne is the president of a network.
Mm-hmm.
No?
That's, that's, that's, that's.
And this goes to your not paying attention to like followers philosophy.
I guess not.
I guess I'm not a big, I'm sorry that I don't – I'm not jumping into the whole followers thing.
Social media is not real life.
I feel like social media is going away.
It's so obviously almost like done.
Well, as your agent now, I'm now feeling likedie is getting lost in the mix here and that maybe this is part
of the solution is we bring eddie to give sean's pitch to michael thorn drive him down you attached
i'm now i'm i think i'm packaging i'm not sure but yeah but and i i'm feeling like i don't want
commission from any of you guys anymore i love you guys that's great and that i will just take
you know a percentage of,
because I'm representing Thorne as well.
So really, I can just wrap up this whole deal.
I think I'm representing, in that scenario,
everyone.
And that frees you guys up to do what you do,
which is this.
I mean, to me, this sounds pretty appealing.
Yeah, it does.
Why am I paying this guy? appealing. Yeah, it does.
Why am I paying this guy?
He loves me.
What does Goodman think of all this, though?
Like, if we could get him to call in, that would be great.
The guild president, David A. Goodman.
Should we call the guild president David Goodman? Do you have a call-in situation?
Yeah, Ryan, can we set that up?
Yeah, let's call him right now.
Let's call guild president David Goodman.
I think call David Goodman himself.
But the question is, whose number is going to
show up on his phone
when he's called?
You can use mine.
We can use yours? Okay, great. Jared, you're going to give
him a ring? You can use mine. Okay, great.
Just do it...
Just hold it up to the mic.
Just hold it up to the mic?
And so what are we going to ask?
We're going to ask if it is okay if we are all of each other's agents.
Yes.
Let's see what happens.
I'll hold it up to the mic.
Yes.
In the event that it is okay.
Hey, guys.
So this is the part of the podcast where we called the president of the Writers Guild.
And he answered.
David Goodman. And he answered.
David Goodman.
And he did answer.
And we had a great conversation.
We talked to him for about 10 minutes.
It was very funny.
And he sort of explained what was going on with the Guild stuff.
I thought it was very informative.
Yes.
And then he told us that he does not want to be on a podcast joking about this thing.
It's a very serious matter.
Well, he said he said he doesn't want it to seem like he's joking about it.
He was pretty.
He wasn't really joking about it. Even when we talked to him, he was he insisted on dryly explaining all of the points of the guild.
But we were
being very we were being really funny and unfortunately we do have to cut out our funny
jokes because i guess yeah he's like to me all this stuff is a joke the and really all of life
is one of the jokes i'll say one of hayes's jokes which is uh david goodman said to him, you're putting me in a very uncomfortable position.
And he said, likewise.
Thank you so much.
And I'll say one of your funny jokes,
which was, he said, when is this episode coming out that's going to end my career as Guild President?
And Sean said, oh, we're doing that.
I think that was the phrasing but it was well I don't think he said as guild president I thought he did I thought he said that's gonna end my
career oh okay and my joke was that him going up against the chance right him going up against the
agencies was in fact what was ending his career yep so we said a lot of really funny stuff uh
but at least you got to
hear a little piece of it
because we supported
each other by telling
each other's jokes.
Now, back to the show.
Well, is this an
interesting point?
Is this accidentally
the most informative
episode we've ever done?
It has to be,
and it feels very
intentional that we did this.
It feels like a great
contribution.
It was a news.
It was a very good, very good panel. Yeah, It was a news. It was a very good panel.
Yeah, it was a great panel.
Great showrunner panel.
It was a really good episode.
Chelsea, thank you for being here.
Chelsea, you want to say anything to the people who are listening?
Just thanking them, really.
Just thanking them.
Yeah, thank you guys for listening.
I just want to give a shout out to my followers.
That's really nice.
Wow, they're going to be juiced.
And here I am saying, hey, thanks for the shout out.
Because I am following.
And I've been following for a while.
And I'd like to also say, hey, thank you for acknowledging me.
And I'm just at replying both of you.
No problem, guys. Nice. That just at replying both of you. No problem, guys.
Nice.
Okay.
That'll get me a lot
of attention.
And I'm quote tweeting
that and I'm going,
whoa, one of my heroes.
Yeah, right.
And thank you,
Chef Kevin.
What are we looking at?
What did we just
X out of on your phone?
Hey guys,
Chef Kevin here.
My friend Kelly's going
on this road trip right now
and she's posting
the whole thing on Instagram.
It's pretty funny. The whole thing on Instagram. It's pretty funny.
The whole thing.
Funny road trip.
Very funny.
Does she have reps?
No.
Oh.
Hmm.
I'll get her info after this.
Well, please do buy the book,
So You're Going Bald by Julia Sharp,
and Huge in France is on Netflix right now.
I am binging this thing.
Yeah. To the point where I'm worried about
myself.
Dangerously
addictive. Do you want to
talk about the show a little bit?
Like
what about it?
Just like a concept, like what it's about
so people can... Pitch it.
Pretend I'm Eddie just pitch it
pretend you're Thorne
just get people excited
about the
just like
yeah just like
talk about
what the show is about
talk about what the show is about
remember I don't know
what a pitch is
right
this is really
putting me on the spot
I don't like explaining
this is how Goodman felt
the show is out already the show is out
already and you know guys i like just like the concept just like a one-liner putting it out there
yeah i like putting it out there i you know what i mean but as opposed to but talking about it
isn't even just like a one-liner just like it's, it's a pretty easy show to describe. So it is,
it is.
And people,
I think people would enjoy just hearing what the show is.
Blaining.
It ruins it though.
Yeah.
That's the thing I worry about.
No,
it's this guy who is a very famous French comedian.
Bye.
That was a HeadGum Podcast.