Hollywood Handbook - The Nextdoor Neighborhood Listens (with Nicole Parker)
Episode Date: July 20, 2021The Boys welcome back NICOLE PARKER to do her podcast The Neighborhood Listen with posts from Chef Kevin’s neighbors.See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy N...otice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.
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this is a head gum podcast
so i was listening to you sean doing the pro version the other day when i i i wasn't available
i can't get enough everyone listening you've got to get into this pro version. Some of this stuff in here, this stuff is cracking me the whole way up.
I was loving it.
But it was you and Matt.
I know.
I know.
And I'll be honest, too, as long as we are talking to the fans, I've had a tough year.
Yeah.
I've had a tough year yeah i've had a tough year and and i'm looking i'm
scrambling for anything to pick me up off the floor and what gets me through it a lot of times
is the pro version is the hollywood handbook pro version is what i really find has carried me
through this darkness please listen and please contribute your hard-earned dollars but i was listening and
you know sometimes you listen and someone on the show says something that's wrong or that's
stupid you know the answer and you're like you idiot i can just tell this is my friend slender
man yeah i can just tell him in person you were talking about the key man came to your house
the key man as well yes yes uh and
he was making keys and you're like how does he make these keys does he have a metal does he have
a vat of molten key in the car this was not this was that was actually what matt thought yeah
matt thought that he was going to have hot liquid metal and that he would just reach
in and pull out a key basically i imagine he put on like a big falconer's glove first and then he
would be able to just pinch a key into the metal and pull it out yeah um so i know a little bit
about this holy shit and i think maybe nicole does too so she can weigh in as well holy shit and who just joined us in nicole's room and i don't think this is a video episode but
i do want to point out something that's happening on the video and we have a friend here and it's
not just nicole nicole's a friend but we have another friend a little furry friend correct
uh i mean yeah let's get into it i have this 11 year old dachshund and her name is roxy
and she had a spinal injury three months ago guys she's okay yes she did that we did that
and she persisted and nevertheless and she's okay but we had to buy this medical grade ramp that literally is it's like buying a hospital bed
is where we're at with a dog because uh that's what she requires because she can't jump anymore
for the rest of her life uh but what looks like it's happening right now is she wants to leave
the room and normally i'm able to get her to calm down for a podcast but i have to get up right now
and doesn't want it spoiled she's saying saying, you know, as we said.
She'd rather hear the edited version.
This is what, you know, this is what gets us through these tough times.
And now I'm going to have to hear like one side of the conversation.
And my mom's here.
It's awkward.
She heard you say you had a hard year and she was like, bitch, don't even start.
You know, I'm sorry.
Did you herniate a fucking disc?
And are you 77 years old, essentially? Don't, yeah't yeah see now you can hear her she's unhappy yeah so uh thanks for
mentioning it so that i can get up and not feel ashamed to let her out
so i can talk about this while my phone's gone i went to um metal college sure
so I know
the school of hard locks
so I know a little bit
about this
bye Roxy
bye Roxy
you're going now
thank you so much
for saying hi
and so I know a little bit
how they make these
these different
chances are
she'll be wanting to get back in
in five minutes
so this should be really fun
yeah she was very weird as she was you guys she was really weird she's in a weird
mood today i think she wanted us yeah to be like no no stay stay stay she's she's deaf she's very
passive-aggressive so sorry where were we at what do I know a lot about? Molten keys. I was explaining how they do these keys because I went to metal college school of hard locks.
And they on the first day, they were like, OK, don't tell anyone this.
Do not tell anyone.
There's only like 10 different keys.
Yeah.
That's what they say to you on the first day.
There's 10 keys. keys and no like no one
has ever tried there's only 10 just like there's only 10 ideas like so there's more than 10 keys
in the world there's only 10 different kinds there's 10 different there's a very shaky one
there's a really jagged one there's a really smooth there's kind of a swoopy one there are about
eight tweeners yeah i've seen that because you see those guys with those big key rings yeah
they go anywhere they want yeah and they and they all have different they name them different
they're all named after pokemans there's each man there's hitmonchan electabuzz
metapod manky bulbosaur ponyta side duck is a key side duck star you
i have nothing to contribute since it's not my realm.
If you had said that they were all named after musical theater composers,
I'd be like absolutely dominating this conversation.
Go, rename the keys.
Destroying us.
Sondheim, Kander, Hammerstein.
William Finn.
Oh, very, very good.
Very eclectic choice.
Let's get in here.
Who's the guy?
Three names.
He did last five years.
John Michael.
Oh, Jason Robert Brown.
Brown.
Yes.
He likes all the keys.
You know what I mean?
The minor one.
Pick a key, Jason Robert Brown.
That joke's for no one here it's just it's just for me well if it isn't nicole popcorn yeah that's right popcorn remember we talked about popcorn last time
oh my gosh we talked so much about it we ate it it. We ate it too. If I remember too, we ate it.
There was a lot of popcorn on the table.
That was like,
you could just do anything
back then on a podcast.
You remember that?
That was like the really wild days.
You'd never be able
to do popcorn today.
It was the wild west.
I mean,
we were experimenting.
We were eating popcorn.
We were,
there were no rules.
There was no manuals.
I was eating basically
anything I saw during,
if we were recording and I saw something i it was going in my mouth and it's and and the and the medium
has lost something obviously shows are more polished there's more of that i mean
maybe maybe the lows aren't quite as low but the highs aren't as high either, are they, Nicole?
Talk about that.
It's true.
I do wonder how that popcorn episode,
I wonder how it'll hold up.
How will it stand up to the test of time?
It's holding up horribly.
Like 25 years from now,
but will it come back around?
It's completely dismantled.
It's already not holding up.
It's holding up worse than the popcorn itself.
Yeah.
It's more stale. It's been digested years ago, but it's more fucked worse than the popcorn itself. Yeah. It's more stale.
Which has been digested years ago,
but it's more fucked up than that.
It's a very poorly regarded episode.
Oh, that's too bad to hear.
That makes me sad,
since it's the only one I did.
I'm making it about me,
which is probably,
it should be about the popcorn.
It's about the times.
That's what it's about.
It's about the times is what it's about.
The popcorn times.
Also, they stopped running the popcorn times,
which I thought was a great publication.
Yes, I used to, my favorite memory when I was a kid
is I would grab my grandpappy's hand
and he would hold my hand
and he would walk me down to the corner
and we would take out 10 or 12 nickels and we would buy a copy to the corner and we would take out, you know, 10 or 12 nickels
and we would buy a copy of the Popcorn Times.
I remember you were only allowed to obtain a copy if you brought a septuagenarian with
you.
And then you had to bring, you had to show your old person and then they gave you your
copy.
Cover to cover.
I'd do the little popcorn maze.
I'd do the popcorn sudoku.
Oh, you did it.
I'd read Poppy the Popcorn's antics
in the little popcorn comic strip.
Loved her.
She'd always get too hot, wouldn't she?
Don't go in the sun without your sun hat, Poppy.
She never learned her lesson.
And then pop, she'd die.
She'd explode and die.
That was the end frame of every single yep which was
savings for them they never had to redraw that one they only had to draw two that's right and now
gone yeah sometimes she wouldn't even make it to the third panel that was a fun way that they would
mix it up and then they'd just have like either a gravestone or they'd have like someone standing
by just throwing up in the street, having just witnessed
essentially a child exploding in front of them.
So, yeah.
So.
So.
So.
So you're doing a different podcast now.
Yeah, I decided.
I was like, oh, these guys have one.
I should have one.
So I just went and had one.
A lot of people saying that.
Yeah, a lot of people.
I got a good one. There's probably more people. There's probably less people without podcasts one so i just wouldn't have a lot of people saying that yeah a lot a lot of people i gotta go there's
probably more people there's probably less people without podcasts than there are with did i say
that right is this what it's like now everyone's has a podcast but like a lot of them come from
conversations with us the biggest reaction to me saying i have a podcast as people being like oh man i got it i got it yeah how many how many
podcasts have has just your podcast spawned like how many guests have you had on and then after
right after they're like i have to do my own podcast they're sometimes doing it by the time
we're done yeah a lot of times we don't get all the way through the episode and they just kind
of start they just start their own on the side.
That seems very awkward.
It usually goes pretty well for them.
And Kevin.
This is like Kevin's little scheme.
Kevin has basically like a new podcast button.
And he's automatically.
Producing it.
Is it a button that generates the name?
Kevin.
I feel like it's all about a name. Talk about the new podcast button.
The name is the whole show isn't it it's a title generator which is a big button actually title generator is a
little little button think of it as like a clock it's the hour and then the episode title is think
about it like big hand on clock because that one i i click more and so before i i spent too much money i made you'd think the the title
should be of the podcast should be the big hand because that's like the big button is like wow
that's the big one but you actually click episode title more so i i has to be bigger gutted my bank
account flipping those um but i yeah basically treat hollywood handbook like a pilot process where
each guest is a potential host and uh shortly follow up after with thoughts where the guest
is the host and the host is the guest nicole yeah this other podcast we're really doing this
huh let's yeah we're really gonna do this on my block well you got you're gonna do my
podcast is that what's happening well yes we've actually thought we would do that we'd better had
kevin has prepared content you might you might find that like you think it's real easy you know
until you try it and then you might find it said you know that maybe uh maybe i just make it look easy your podcast is the neighborhood listen that's right
where we're saying a lot of talking out there a lot of people talking why don't we actually
listen to the neighbors why don't we actually hear from them and we answer their questions
instead of just like filling the air with our own our own ideas right
so many podcasts you're describing it better than i and then i describe it to friends now i'm
realizing oh yes because i describe it to every one of my friends like i've like i'm constantly
reminding don't have to describe it to me i don't know if i'm your friend i feel like i should be
i don't have to describe to me i know what it is and i can describe it back to you and you're really the first podcast that made the headphones
more important than the mic that's what i always say how's that how is that what do you mean it's
just listening you just get questions from next door and you just listen to them so many podcasts
they don't need the headphones all they need is the mic because they're talking at you yours i just turned on what i want to hear too or maybe more people listen we are we
are trying to focus on the word listen but also on the word neighbor we're just trying to listen
to our neighbors so we just find the people that post and and maybe it's either a person someone's
posting about maybe we go find them or maybe it's the person who's complaining about
someone else and we want them to explain themselves.
We just want people to feel seen
and heard. Not seen.
Probably more heard since it's a podcast.
We see them. Just the two of us.
Me and Paul.
Not the right word.
Not the right word. That was a misstep
on my part.
Kevin, what do you want to do with this in the edit?
Can I come back from this moment?
We will find out for sure.
No matter what, we will find out.
I'm just, I'm not going to leave.
I'm going to stay here.
Kevin, is there any way?
I might leave.
I'm afraid this might not work.
In the edit, I do want to leave in me correcting nicole because i think that was
a really strong moment for me i i would love to remove nicole's mistake
might be weird with for me it was such a powerful moment when i was able to identify the mistake
she'd made and really steer the show back on course and with kindness but i don't want to humiliate our guests who also i she didn't
really say anything when i asked whether we were friends or not but it's but it but she didn't say
no oh hey i'm still here i feel it's weird because it seems like you're talking about me like i'm
gone and i almost thought that i didn't exist anymore usually when you just took me on a very
very scary i'm already having that from like the year...
Because like, let me tell you,
I've had a hard year too.
Just like you and just like my dog.
And so I don't really know if I'm like here anymore.
So then when you did that just now,
I was like, oh, fuck.
Okay.
So that just let me know I am gone.
And you know what?
Even though I'm gone,
somehow hearing you talk,
because then you're talking about me,
like I'm not here.
So I'm like, oh, I'm not here.
But listen to that. I still made a mistake mistake not surprising to me that even in not being here
on this planet i still made a mistake that's very me this is not your fault we he started talking
you about about that way because when most of our guests say that they're not gonna leave they do
leave shortly after that is it to start their podcast?
I think it's to get us to turn around or just be distracted or something.
Or just kind of lull us enough.
It's really making us let our guard down so that we don't resist them leaving.
And then they crawl out of the room.
Really?
So they think we can't see them
on the zoom camera but we're and we're recording normally we're recording in um in like a chuckie
cheese where there is the adult size normal door and then there's also the little mouse hole door
that kids can crawl through and so um that makes a lot they're able to crawl out through that yeah
and by the way totally totally you're my friend, Sean.
I didn't mean to like pause.
Like I said, I don't, I'm just aware.
Oh my God, are we still talking about this?
I mean, you were just a minute ago.
So, I mean, I just, let's put it to bed.
Okay.
We're going to listen to the neighbor.
Kevin's neighbor.
Okay. Kevin got neighbor. Okay.
Kevin got questions from Next Door Neighborhood online.
The app.
Boom.
And we're listening to it.
I haven't heard of that one.
We're going to listen.
This is your show.
This is what you do on your show.
Right.
And so Kevin is going to read the questions. You're pod-splaining to me right now is what's happening. your show right and so kevin is going to read your pod you're podsplaining
to me right now is what's happening your show meet our show you're literally you're podsplaining my
podcast to me sometimes it helps sometimes it helps to hear from an outside observer what your
show is and what you do on such a mind trip right now having okay so all right let's go okay i'll i'll share my screen so y'all can see it this question is
any small business ideas i'm i'm already a freelancer but what's a good small business
to do for male or female okay they provided examples like baking and selling those comma i
know dog walking and care doing stuff like Instacart and Shipt.
But what else is out there?
This is very considerate for them to name the jobs,
the small business ideas that they already know.
Right, so no one's going to waste their time.
Because everyone would have jumped right in with baking, for sure.
Baking and selling those.
That's exactly what I was going to say.
Baking and selling those that's exactly like bam bam and selling those given yeah being selling those obviously i'm gonna save your fingers don't type
that that's i wrote that out yeah i i actually you know they said any small business ideas i'm
already a freelancer but what is a good small business to do and i started going i can't answer
this question i don't know if it's for female or male right it's a very good thing that uh this person specified um which is a little strange
because this person's saying that they don't they're just gonna are they gonna try to take
an opportunity from a female or from a male like it sounds as if there's just gonna be like curious about that too is this a work it situation yes i if people remember the show work it which was you referring
to the sitcom you're referring to the shortlist sitcom that they basically copied um it was like
bosom buddies but it was more it was more in the workplace and it was during the height of america's
man session where no men could get jobs and the men had to dress as women to get jobs.
Yeah.
And what a tiny window of a time that was.
It was that moment.
They got in there at just the right time and the show.
And they they got out too late.
I feel like it was a beautiful landing and they, you know, they went out on top.
So this could be a work it situation.
But yeah, so that was and then it says also, I mean, this person really punctuation makes a really big difference here.
We find on our podcast when we're reading these because for a minute i was like baking selling those what those
what because it just says baking and selling those comma i know uh in some ways he's written
he or she has written a little poem here it's kind of it's kind of basically they wrote a haiku
like baking and selling those like being selling those i know dog walking and care
it's a haiku you know it says any small business ideas and then some people and i would be afraid
of this some people took this as an opportunity just to brag i am noticing this as well you'll
find the most interesting things happen in the comments always yeah i have a bookkeeping business
says linda something uh were there only just two comments then just two just just the two comments
thought about becoming a notary it's pretty good pretty good small business any small business
ideas you thought about becoming a notary that's about as small as a business gets
it's literally just a little stamp it's just a stamp in a book i mean what a racket the whole
fucking why aren't we all doing that honestly
i've now i'm thinking about it this actually helped me you don't even have to if you get
really are you gonna leave your podcast in the middle of the podcast to start your notary business
kevin hit the little button notaries really good notaries they don't have to you know you're
supposed to actually be there and like
witness it or whatever yes if you can throw the stamp from far enough away and actually stamp the
thing you don't even have to you can just drive by and notarize stuff that's basically what happened
to us we had to notarize something this past year that's basically what it was couldn't have been
easier they don't break stride no notary us
notary notary sorry sorry i'm working on something so i have an idea for a small business
for this person so there's baking we all know about baking and selling and selling those i know
yeah but what about a business where you just instead instead of baking stuff, you fry it?
You have a pan instead of an oven.
And you just, or you can like saute stuff.
You can put like a light sear, maybe like a searing business.
Everyone is baking.
Everyone is using the oven.
What about just having one pan and a fire?
Like a sous vide business no i love this really that's extra work you know and yeah anyone can bake right or toaster business
okay meaning you have a toaster toasting and selling those toasters take up all this counter
space they really you know what i mean imagine
you don't have to have a toaster anymore because my small business is actually doing the toasting
and now what do you have on your counter basically whatever you want bag of sugar now there's room
i've just never have a place to put my bag of sugar exactly because the toaster's in the
fucking way i have an idea for a business it says dog walking
and care this is a little bit an idea that i got from seeing nicole with her dog earlier what about
carry the dog carry the dog pick the dog up carry the dog dog walk and carry the dog. And carry the dog around.
Hold the dog up to the Zoom, say hi, and carry the dog.
Yeah, I mean, you see a lot of dogs in strollers,
so I don't know if that's going to edge into that business.
But I think that what's nice is the word care is in care.
Oh, well, the sound care is in care.
There's a care in carry, meaning when you're holding a dog rather than pushing them in a stroller there it does seem to be more care it's more and it takes
a lot of it takes a lot of effort my dog doesn't always want to walk the entire way we do have to
carry her and i would love to pay someone else to do that let me dispel a myth real quick before
reddit jumps on us too and nicole just proven something. I think this podcast is not in
the pocket of big dog stroller and we never have been. If they choose to advertise with us or pay
for some of our recording equipment, that's fine. But we are always going to do what we think is morally right in terms of the content on this
show. Yes, we've seen a lot of dogs in strollers. Do we want to cut into that business with our
dog walking and carrying idea? Hopefully not. Hopefully there's room for both, but that's not
what drives us. We always come to our audience with our honest opinion and
we do and we do what's righteous and what's good wow well well said sir with the dog stroller i'll
prove our independence prove it with the dog carry business you could double as kind of like a
neighborhood watch so you're carrying roxy around the neighborhood right and as you pass the houses
you just put roxy up to the window look inside just make sure everything's okay people inside
are like hi roxy all good in here no no no robberies happening like everything's good
roxy checks it moves on to the next house yes i would use a different example i failed to mention
that roxy's also blind okay but the criminal doesn't
know that and and i also think you could be doing cosplay as jesse plemon's game night character
am i wrong that he's got a little dog under his arm am i making that up i'm not you gotta look at
someone else in the zoom because kevin is jesse clemens holding like a little dog
under his arm when he says how could that possibly be profitable for the frito-lay company that
sounds right i think so i just watched it i think i did see that oh god it feels like forever ago
did he have a dog i can't remember i want to say he's holding a little dog almost almost like a Roxy-sized dog.
And he's an officer of the law.
If Roxy's blind,
you could also kind of put her snoot right up to the window.
Just like, okay,
just making sure everything smells okay in there.
Dogs don't use their eyes anyway.
They never have.
Fact.
Well, yeah, I guess I could do that.
So you're saying that you're carrying a dog around and
you're also checking in you're looking in neighbors windows or just snooting them you're
snooting the window that's right sorry i didn't use the proper term maybe bring a little wipe
maybe bring a little wipe for if the snoot is just a dog snoot yeah put in roxy's paw so roxy
is wiping the window down after oh that's cute
okay yeah i'm not mad i see that outside thanks roxy
uh and then that way i i but see in this case i'm carrying my own dog you're saying this is
someone else carries someone carries someone else's dog. That's part. I'm off job now.
Oh, you're off that.
Now we're just broke.
Now we're just I'm just fighting for you to do.
You said you've been having a hard year and Roxy has to.
This feels like a great bonding experience for the two of you.
OK, I don't care about this post anymore.
Oh, I get it.
OK, so I'll just tonight I'll try carrying her around and snooting in the window and we'll
just see how the neighbors take to it they might love it and she does a wipe she'll do it i'll
bring a wipe for the snooze i'll bring i'll put her paw up she's got a little squeegee
roxy's squeegeeing the window that's roxy's uh small business idea unreal and for my toasting business if people are asking
is it a toaster oven so you can make croque monsieur takes up more space it is not a toaster
oven it is a vertical toaster but i can pull the lever down and turn it over on its side
potentially quick enough that some of the cheese might not
fall off the top and down into the bottom of my vertical toaster i can actually turn it on its
side pretty fast kind of with one big slap next question next post okay this question comes in
the comments the post says famous, famous birdbath.
The birdbath that is not just for birds anymore.
And this-
That it's a deer.
Big ass deer sipping in there.
Now, Sarah asks, is that a reindeer?
We usually don't see them up here.
So yeah, so Sarah says, is that a reindeer?
We usually don't see them up here.
Hilda then says, actually, we'd never fucking see them up here hilda then says actually we'd never fucking see
them up here seriously it's a male white it really does look like reindeer are much larger and live
in colder climates i'm not an expert but you know judging by the size of his antlers i'm gonna guess
he's two to three years old so i'm not an expert was like you know i don't think they live here at all i think maybe it's probably not a reindeer it was
like i am an expert i'm enough of an expert that like your post sarah is total bullshit
but like i'm not gonna say it's definitely a two to three year old but it is once again people
bragging in the comments he's bragging about how much how much deer knowledge he has by the way
kevin you moved away from the the you know the new post that was underneath the first one you
showed us but that whole post was a brag which it just said any good lexus mechanic and lexus
was spelled with a z on the end it's like somebody recommend a reliable Lexus mechanic? Lexus.
And you know, he spelled it twice that way.
So that seems very, very intentional.
He really doubled down.
I hate to tell you, dude, I think you don't have a Lexus.
I think someone gave you a Lexus. It's like a far side cartoon where the dog the dog writes cat food but it's fud i think
that you got i think that she got somebody sold you alexis you thought you were getting a deal
yeah somebody opened up their trench coat and said here are the keys to your lexus
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Which is this?
It's a little bit of all of them.
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How many add-ons and what are some of them?
It's one big add-on and it's you on your bed.
You're so tired after you eat my meal.
The promise is the meal makes us sleepy.
You've been pushing that so much.
You're saying that you will be added on to your bed.
Yeah.
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That's the opposite of what this
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What's the second? It's you and your bed.
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This is not even up for consideration.
So let's just hear what the actual meal was.
What was the food?
I don't want to go to bed.
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What does it mean
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standing in the middle and as i'm driving and i'm cruising they're holding their hand up for like a
high five almost and they're really aggressively like pushing it out i'm like am i supposed to drive
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always be glad you did it kind of like this podcast except it is easy for me hey guys rocket
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Hollywood handbook. boys okay next question need help with repairing beam
is there anyone that can recommend someone who can repair this protruding beam
thanks for your thoughts i have a very obvious response to this mr beam
keep an eye on him it's not the kind of repair where you could just say okay good luck
i'm going to run an errand it looks like a very simple cut and dry job okay you know he's gonna
get up there you say okay he say i have all the parts let me just hammer in the new beam
if you look away when you look back up he will be giving himself a wedgie
hanging off of the beam with the hammer somehow in his mouth
let's see someone underneath named sugar by the way says i can take a look at it and maybe guide
you on what you need to do yeah send me a private message i would offer to do it here's another
brag but i am up to my neck in work right now which means he was fixing another beam and it
actually fell on him and he's stuck and it's up to his neck
yeah that's mr beam it's probably mr beam that is possibly mr beam saying i have too much work
but i'll fix this beam via text for you i can take a look at it and maybe guide you on what
you need to do and to which this original poster might respond you are taking a look at it. This is it. It's a big ass photo of the fucking bee.
There's two, in fact.
And the guidance would probably be,
replace it.
I would just burn the house down.
It looks absolutely horrible.
There's no way that building is safe.
You have to get a new house.
You have to get a new house.
That would be my suggestion.
Just move.
It's probably haunted as well.
Just move.
Okay, next question.
Next question.
I need a great computer genius.
Hi, neighbors.
I need to find a person or company
who can help me with my computers.
My old computer guy moved,
and I'm not just computer savvy.
If you know someone
who is really knowledgeable about computers would you pass
their information on to me thanks so much this is a woman who broke up with a guy and one of the
greatest things about him was that he did all her tech shit and this is 100 a rebound ask she
broke up with the computer guy yeah she's looking for her next guy for i actually this guy
who answered it i don't have a better answer than the guy below who's uh i mean this is exactly what
i would have said so this response is one drive on the cloud service with microsoft and you need
to be log in all computer and telephone in order to see your items on all equipment also have limited space unless you
pay for more than five you need help connecting into one drive i think this was the computer that
responded it's her computer she really is having big problems drive on the cloud service with
microsoft and you need to log in all computers you are so so so lonely you need help all 15
comments are just the computer trying to trick her into hiring chess this is the i think this
is the most popular answer kevin can you show me the six previous comments. Someone recommends a computer business in Kenneth Village,
which is...
It's a great theme park,
and it's been closed for the year,
but it is.
It's niche.
It's very niche,
but if you're a fan,
then you're a lifetime fan.
Of Kenneth Branagh.
Is it Kenneth Branagh Village?
Is it just...
Is it a themed park of all of his movies
once more into the Kenneth village dear friends
see again though of you if you really read between the lines these are women trying to
hook her up hi Susan you can try calling Chris she gives his number try calling Jerry he now
works from home he's local and very good nice guy too there's no need there's no need she might as well said yeah he'll
go down on you literally like that's exactly it's all code it's all very yeah i know how to read
these messages they're all talking about a dude going down on her it's all that's what it is and
then the computer saying that as well thing and that's what she's asking for too she's nothing
wrong with her computer and it's in its funny way it trying to say that i hope i hope she finds what she's looking for
i need to understand quote the cloud for backup as well as a hard drive for backup
might i recommend the the film sex tape
right they forgot to delete it.com i don't know if that website's still alive but that was the
film website they forgot to delete it.com and so nicole have you seen this film i have not please
uh please explain what's an you know what's a gift you might give your friends around
christmas time oh boy this feels like such a trick question. Well, you're known for your taste in music, particularly musical theater.
So I'll give my mom tickets to Hamilton.
No, you won't. You'll make a playlist of all your favorite musical theater songs,
upload it onto an iPad and then physically give thead with the playlist on it to everyone you know
but there's a catch you also will put your sex tape on there what they forgot to delete it they
forgot to delete it.com they told themselves they were gonna delete it That sounds like a terrible, that's a terrible small business. Mm-hmm. Giving iPads away?
Yes.
Okay, next question.
Metal stand for an electronic keyboard.
Looking for a piano keyboard stand.
All caps.
Okay, every time they say this,
it is in all caps.
Metal stand for electronic keyboard.
So this has gone badly in the past yes someone has given them
a metal sit down and a metal lie down looking for a piano keyboard stand that is just sitting
in your garage now i'm doing it yeah they said nobody commented i would really appreciate if we can make it to you,
if we can make it to use,
because I have here an old Yamaha PSR-E303
that was given to me by a good friend,
which happened to be purchased from a garage sale.
So if you have a spare stand,
kindly let me know.
Thanks in advance and God bless everyone.
Wow.
That's a very aggressive god bless everyone though
i think yeah also garage sale is uh those that's capitalized too so how'd that get screwed up
yeah i like the specific of looking for a piano keyboard stand that is just sitting in your garage
so that when if you try to charge the money and say like hey give me like 20 bucks they
go it's just sitting in your garage i only want want it if you forgot about it i'm doing you a
favor this thing was just sitting in your garage there are sometimes posts that are just like uh
you know set of five tables you come pick up like it's just so quick it's like they just want to get
rid of shit and you have to do all the work just so quick it's like they just want to get rid of
shit and you have to do all the work and they just want it gone they're already mad at your
anticipated questions yes and this is the same sort of thing in that they don't want someone
who's gonna you're right who's gonna like haggle a price or whatever they they want someone who
has forgotten they have to go look in their garage flip the light on they haven't been in there in months and they just look around and there it is there's a
stand i don't want your stand unless there's bugs living on it that's right there needs to be a
family of some small creatures living under it there has to be there have to be cobwebs there's got to be a nest inside it yeah that's
the stand for me you have to evict a possum to uh to to give it to us okay next okay last one last
one oh boy hi neighbors did anyone hear the police announcement from the helicopter above this intersection just now?
Did anyone hear what the police announcement was?
You find out that these are usually mostly about helicopters and coyotes.
Yeah.
This one is actually about both, which is,
look out, we are about to drop a bunch of coyotes.
Wait, okay, so it says they heard something like, we'll release the dogs dogs and maybe they meant from the helicopter yes that's what it says it says we'll release the dogs
there the dogs have parachutes there's no they are they're not dogs are you asking that in general
like your dogs just always do they have like a like are they born with parachutes roxy's wearing
one yeah speaking of which she wants to come back in.
Exactly what I said.
It's longer than five minutes.
See, and I knew this passive-aggressive thing.
It's bad.
It's bad.
I'm going to bring over here so she can snoot the microphone.
Great.
Have her snoot the screen, too, please.
And bring the squeegee as well.
These coyotes, and where you're picturing the parachutes,
it's not, like like in their midsection.
So they're falling feet first.
It's kind of on the parachute is on the coyotes hindquarters.
So the coyotes are falling mouth mouth first.
So they will bite the criminals.
But they are also the parachutes.
So they're it's not like their teeth are like, you know, shooting at you at some incredible velocity.
They're sort of drifting, floating back and forth like when they drop the $10 coupon out of the rafters of a basketball game.
I love the guy at the bottom who calls it a copter.
I mean, I've heard chopper, but who calls it a copter?
I saw that copter.
That's Dale.
I can hear and see the copter.
I used to see copters in Korea.
I would get on here and I would comment,
oh, it's one of LA's native whirlybirds.
Unfortunately, not an endangered species.
That's the comment that I see in my neighborhood
that I always like.
Methinks.
It always begins with me thinks.
Speaking of a reference Nicole made earlier.
Oh, no, that was to Far Side.
It was a different cartoon.
One of these responders is normal.
I just want to point out one of the responders
is named normal and is actually normal from...
Oh, normal normal.
From Garfield's nemesis yes yes uh it's interesting you call them responders and i never realized that why people are so excited when they
when they have the first comment and they just write first is because they are in fact a first
responder they are the real first responders.
And so what's most interesting to me to know about this is Garfield has mailed Nermal to Kevin's neighborhood.
Wow.
Or he's at least at some sort of UPS holding station
on his way to Abu Dhabi.
Nicole, your show, this, I mean, your show show this is great this i love doing your show it's
so nice it's so much nicer than doing our show well i would i just keep doing yours you keep
doing you you don't you don't need what you're doing is working great okay we'll just do ours
over yeah no in our place it's it's fun though i mean I mean, it's never boring to go see what people are talking about, ever.
Just get to know your neighbors.
Just try to listen, everybody.
Go talk to them.
Go in their yard.
Get up against their window with your snoot.
Snoot.
Snoot it up.
I was promised that Roxy would snoot the cam,
and that did not happen.
You know, and I'm sorry.
I misunderstood.
She actually, I don't know how she got back in here
but she was in here and then wanted out again i said that earlier i said i said the dog is it was
probably yes another person in the house let her in yeah we missed that moment but that's all right
i'm gonna try it with her tonight we'll see how my neighbors uh handle it and how can how can i
listen to the show you can listen to the show uh on can listen to the show on Stitch Premium.
It's called The Neighborhood Listen.
I know.
Listen.
I have to say this sentence.
And you can follow us.
You can also email us at burntandjone at gmail.com. Burnt Mia Payday is Paul's character name,
and Joan Pedestrian is my name.
He's a pharmacist, and I'm a realtor.
Is that often the first interaction with a listener rather than listening first you just like to establish kind of
an email correspondence with the reason why is because people like to email us posts from their
own neighborhood that is the reason is never because the reason is that very very powerful
this is a very powerful
episode for John
and Kevin if you could
remove
obviously
the grammar error
I believe my correction speaks
for itself
bye this week on the Patreon speaks for itself. Bye.
Hollywood Handbook.
This week on the Patreon,
Carl and Ahsan discuss
the importance of black artists
in music.
Andy and I pitch to the boys,
us attending,
podcast movement,
and the flagrant ones
are mostly talking
all things basketball.
Check out these bonus podcasts
and videos of the full episodes
at patreon.com
slash the flagagrowons.
Hollywood Handbook.
That was a HeadGum Podcast.