Hollywood Handbook - The VR Family Guy Series Order (with Peter Banifaz)
Episode Date: June 29, 2021After getting a full series order, The Boys and PETER BANIFAZ rehearse episode two of Virtual Reality Family Guy. Make sure to check out Peter's Instagram videos here!See Privacy Policy at ht...tps://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.
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This is a HeadGum Podcast.
So I, I'm like, I've carved out the time to do this.
I can totally do the full record here.
But like once I do have to go, like as soon as we're done, it is my cake day today.
So yes, yes. as we're done it is my cake day today uh so yes yes and and by the way uh if i haven't said it
and i know i did say it in text but i haven't said it face to face happy cake day and it's so
fucking awesome to see how far you have come like i remember when you first logged on and were so nervous to make a username
and we're like is anyone gonna give me any gold like i'm never gonna get any gold why am i even
doing this um but i got so much gold i got so many little treats for my posts. Sir, you won the internet multiple times, sir.
I won the internet so many times.
And my wife is doing something,
like she has something planned, I don't know exactly.
I can hear a little
bustling in the other room, and it
sounds like possibly some sort of
band warming up.
Yeah, she's busy.
Of course, we've left time for
the romantic portion of the
obviously yes i'm sure the band is paid until 11 p.m on the dot and then they get out and then
from 11 to i i would assume three or four in the morning the two of you will make love in multiple
positions and ideally it will end with one or both of you busting hey welcome to hollywood handbook and
insider's guide to kicking butt kicking butt and dropping names on the red carpet line back always
in this industry we call showbiz what up what up peter we've got him we've got the guy peter
peter peter peter peter peter Peter. First time guest. Haven't had you.
So talk to me, Peter, before Hayes even gets into this.
You're, and I'll do this occasionally with these guests,
and I'll say, so you're like so funny or whatever, huh?
Well, first of all, fellas, thank you so much for having me on.
I, you know, I've been told that I thank you so much for having me on.
I've been told that I'm funny.
Well, so have I, Peter.
So have I been told.
Because now I'm getting... You're friends with Carl?
Carl Tye, yeah. Very good friend of mine.
So he's talking about my friend Peter is so funny.
I'm friends with him too.
Is he saying that to you about me?
He has said it about both of you.
Absolutely.
Yeah, yeah.
They're so funny.
They're very funny.
Great guys.
They know a lot about the industry,
stuff like that.
It talks about how funny you are,
and it doesn't always feel great.
And Kevin's saying too that you're funny and that you know and it doesn't always feel great and kevin's saying too that
you're funny and that you're friends with carl i would trade honestly i i do not care if he talks
about me to other people as long as he's not talking about other people to me yeah yeah
and can i tell you something else that happened to me today peter as i said to my wife who i love
very much i said i'm going to record hollywood handbook today i know it's great it's me it's
my life you know fucking rocks and i said to her hey you know at five o'clock i i have to um
i have to record a podcast and she like wanted me to do something else some take care of my
family or something and i said this is how i take care of my family or something. And I said, this is how I take care of my family.
And she said, oh, who's the guest?
And I said, he's Carl's friend.
It's Peter.
And she said, oh, he's really funny.
Oh, that's so nice of her.
Well, how does my wife, what are you, what's going on here?
I mean, I really, that's a strange question for me to answer. I don't know exactly what's going on here? I mean, I, I really, that's a strange question for me to answer.
I don't know exactly what's going on here,
but I mean,
I feel it's nice that your wife has heard of me and, and,
and is she telling you that I'm funny at all?
I've never had a single conversation with you.
I haven't talked to her.
I haven't talked to her.
I've never met her.
And she's,
yeah,
but she's got your name in her mouth somehow.
I,
I would say maybe she
saw me on a tv show or something like that on the show yeah oh yeah yeah sure uh no that sounds right
that happens you know she's watching tv sometimes when i come in she's watching tv
goes off really quick kicks off oh hi she got and i and she's got tears streaming down her face, but from laughing.
Oh, okay. Well, that definitely won't
be anything that I've made.
I think I've made some funny stuff, but maybe nothing
that's going to really make someone
cry.
But, you know... What TV show?
What TV show?
I've been lucky enough. I did three seasons
of Shameless.
Season 8, 9, nine and ten it's a
great show it's an honor to be on that show i've been on uh it's been my honor to be on brooklyn
nine nine they're absolutely running amok on both of those shows huh yes these are madcap shows
people are absolutely going hog wild both of them the people on the shows i wouldn't trust them you know as far as
i could throw them i i would just interject just to say at both shows in question people were
wonderful and it was a real pleasure working with everyone it was a very collaborative i can only
speak to what i've seen right and they're acting rather madcap i haven't worked on on those
shows per se but i worked on in talks with some understanding them yeah i guess what i view them
i'm i'm at work right right you know i will just say that you know both shows um are emmy uh winning shows too uh so it's it's a high quality i'm not
saying i'm not trying to pump myself up i'm just saying the the it's not a coincidence that you
were on it and then they won an emmy and no but they want to maybe you i got no no way before i
got on so i'm absolutely not saying they got on an Emmy. Once they got the Emmy,
then they were able to get you.
Her name is Emmy on there as well.
She's very winning
in addition to that.
What did you say? Emmy?
Her name is Emmy on there.
Her name's Emmy on there.
You didn't know that.
She's on the show. She didn't tell you?
There's a girl named emmy on which show
oh oh emma
her name is emma not emmy
okay
well i have to side with haze
here and it's nothing personal it is of course
just a relationship thing we've been working
together forever you of course
i mainly know through my wife
laughing at you on tv and then turning the tv off when i
come inside so i i'm obviously not going to take your side in this one yeah i i if i could just say
um i i'm sorry that uh you know it seems like you're you're a little bit uh like never apologize
for making someone laugh no i apologize no matter what you say if it's a joke you then even if you didn't
make someone laugh even if you made someone pissed we can never be apologizing for this
it's a this is this is a disservice to all of us in comedy if we're if we're apologizing for
the work that we do every every single day even if what we say is not even really a joke.
And it just makes someone angry.
And just a dangerous idea.
Yeah.
Dangerous idea?
Okay.
That's wild.
Look, I was apologizing simply because you seemed a little bit peeved.
And I wanted to just, you know, you guys are being kind enough to have me on the show.
I wanted to make sure there was no. What? enough to have me on the show what no okay great peeved please I'm just trying to get my footing I didn't know how your name
ended up in my wife's mouth I thought maybe you'd have some answers for me you say you've never
spoken to her so it's probably the tv thing which great happy for you love the
emmys you know and that's and that's great and this was part of the orientation we did kind of
talk about this before the new guest orientation where you just run through the basics don't
scream really loud don't be whispering very quiet be Be sitting up the whole time. Just be normal.
Please don't lie down.
Yeah.
Be sitting normally.
Don't lie down.
Don't stand up.
And Sean's going to get pissed.
People are doing all of this.
People are doing all of this during the shows.
They're lying down.
Ideally, they were.
They were until we did New Guest Orientation.
Yeah.
This, you know, all of these are when you see the warning
label on like a hair dryer that says like don't bring this in the bathtub that's because somebody
did it you know they didn't just come up with this might happen somebody did it so now they
have to write it down damien faye he was he tipped over a bunch of times yeah okay well
he thought that was what he's supposed to be doing because we didn't tell him
Okay.
Well,
he thought that was what he's supposed to be doing.
Cause we didn't tell him.
No,
that was our fault.
You know,
to,
you know,
to a large extent,
because we weren't,
we weren't, I will say through it.
Well,
here's some of that stuff is pretty self-explanatory.
If you're doing some kind of a podcast,
you shouldn't be lying down,
standing up suddenly arbitrarily at these things.
It feels that way now,
you know,
because I think we have introduced some change in this industry, some long overdue, some much needed change where we do make our guests comfortable.
And I hope you feel really comfortable.
I've been actually being really cool to you.
I'm feeling more comfortable now.
I think when it first started, I was comfortable.
Then suddenly, like, I got a little prior to the orientation.
Yeah, right.
But now I'm feeling great. And yeah, I got a little prior to the orientation. Yeah. Right. Uh,
but now I'm feeling great.
And,
uh,
yeah,
I'm just,
that's great.
Cause we actually have a huge amount of work to do and we have to,
we have so much to do.
We can't keep wasting time.
Last time Carl,
I think was on the show less than a year ago,
we did an episode of VR family guy,
uh,
and that show, and we're just doing it for fun
we're just doing vr family guy for just like a fun it's like what we do when we hang out we do
an episode of vr family guy just for each other just for like each other make each other make
each other laugh and crack up and to keep the creative gears going it's actually one year this week by the time this
episode comes out isn't that interesting well kevin everybody yes mr numbers
that's what i was gonna say actually it's next week damn it sorry you can do this again next
week so it's a virtual it It's Virtual Reality Family Guy.
Yeah, sorry. I should have said
VR Family Guy. It's Virtual Reality Family Guy.
The show. And this has been
sort of unbeknownst to us.
This, you know,
we say something on the show
and then one of our reps takes
this thing and sees
if there's a market out there for this
and people have cars. And we go, that's not why we're doing it. We're just doing it reps like takes this thing and is like sees if there's like like a market out there for this and
people have cars and we go that's not why we're doing it we're just doing it to make our friends
laugh and have fun but they go actually people want to uh back up the truck and and pay for this
stuff so vr family guy has a full season order now. Nice. Congratulations, guys. Congratulations. To you as well.
Thank you.
It's awesome. It kicks ass.
Great.
We got to do this right now.
We're pretty
far behind on making it.
Carl's busy. He doesn't talk to us outside
of Flagrant Ones.
We'll do Flagrant Ones with him and then he's like,
we will not be speaking outside of...
We'll talk on that show, obviously,
but not outside of it. After the show,
it's pretty much that's done and he's
hanging with his other funny friends.
We were lucky enough to have one here today.
Well, thank you so much.
That surprised me. Carl's a very nice guy
and it surprises me that
he literally told you guys no
communication outside the show.
He said please.
He did say please.
He was nice.
He said thank you.
Before I had actually agreed or not agreed to it
he was saying
thank you, I appreciate your understanding
of this and I was like okay well I haven't told you
if I do or not yet.
I will say he limits the time he spends with people.
I spoke to him a couple of days ago.
Okay, that's interesting.
I've heard that he actually does not do that.
Okay.
That he specifically doesn't limit the time that he spends with people.
Yeah.
I mean, then I guess, you know, I've seen a different side of him.
You know, I spoke to him a while back, and he was like, hey, you know,
I'm busy this week, but let's hang out next week.
Called him next week, he was also busy.
Boundary.
Four weeks went by
and still hadn't seen my bud.
My buddy.
You're calling every weekend.
You're checking in every weekend.
I'm calling in every Friday and Sunday.
Friday and Sunday. You're checking both every weekend saying, Hey, calling in every Friday and Sunday. Yeah. Friday and Sunday.
Okay.
Both sides of it.
Wow.
Yeah.
Cause the Friday is the first of the weekend.
Sunday is the last,
you know,
got it.
Beginning.
You know it,
you know,
that's right.
That's that's the week.
So we,
Carl,
we're getting some of that Carl energy with you.
Cause you're very good friends with Carl. And so this is us saying, okay, we're getting some of that Carl energy with you because you're very good friends with Carl.
And so this is us saying, okay, we're doing Virtual Reality Family Guy again.
We're doing the show.
And so, like, you're obviously, like, the viewer is wearing virtual reality goggles and a smell cap over their nose and a tongue uh sheath as well that is releasing
taste sensations they have a body suit on that has different like ticklers and stuff inside of it
that can sort of nuzzle against them during if brian the dog walks by their leg or something
then it would actually be a calf tickler this sounds awful
it sounds like a lot of very uncomfortable
things happening at once
it's not always
all activated at once
but I understand
you're not necessarily the target
market, the customer for this
but there obviously is one
we have a series order
we're not asking you to view it.
We're asking you to help us make it at scale or below.
Below scale.
That's not...
Ideally, it would be below scale just because, you know,
we're kind of doing you a favor.
Yeah, okay. I'm still... I'll be honest, fellas. I'm still not 100% clear on what we're kind of doing you a favor. Yeah, okay.
I'm still, I'll be honest, fellas,
I'm still not 100% clear on what we're doing
and how I'm helping, but I...
Really?
It's virtual reality, family guy.
Do you not know who family guy is?
I know what both those things are, family guy.
No, it's three, family guy and virtual reality,
but I don't know how I'm going to help you.
I guess let's do it and then i'll find out right
no i prefer that you find out and then i just don't know how i would find out and then you do
it ideally we're gonna have to have you find out because otherwise you are living the experience
you choose your character you can be any of you can be family guy you can be any of his friends and you wait so it
starts with you waking up obviously so like you put this on and you go to sleep okay this is your
normal self you put on the whole apparatus and then you go to sleep and then you wake up the
next day in this body in this avatar basically am i actually going to sleep with this whole gear on
like choose your character choose your character okay brian the dog brian brian the dog okay okay
you're gonna need then i think a little more gear yes just to change your posture and stuff
you need like a um like the other suits are less restrictive but like this because they're humans
yeah exactly brian yeah you're gonna need to have we have to be able to have a tail and stuff like
that so brian walks completely upright like a regular person not in virtual reality family
guy that makes no sense because then okay it's live action it's real this one's real okay okay okay so and is
seth mcfarland does he have any involvement in this or this is we would love to have seth if
you have a line on seth that would be our dream come true to have him get he's involved in it i
mean he created family guy yeah oh yeah he got to sign off on you all his fingerprints are all over
it because the characters were inspired by a lot of his stuff.
He created all the characters.
And he voices a lot of them.
So you know that.
If you know that,
then why did you ask if he was involved?
Sorry, and I actually have a big issue
with him creating all the characters.
I'm certain there are other people
on that staff who get character payments
from the WGA for introducing some of the various ensemble that make up the town of Quahog.
I'm sure they do.
This is like a collaborative effort.
I don't know if you thought on Shameless.
If it was all you, if it was just like the Peter show or something.
No, I absolutely didn't think that. it was all you if it was just like the peter show or something no i i absolutely but bill macy and a
lot of the other people there you know are super involved in what makes that show work well i was
a recurring so in their series regular so i am in no way shape or form saying it was the peter show
uh look uh that's what this show is actually so we can't family guy is the guy this this one we
are calling the peter show yeah which would be great for you i mean you'll be comfortable in that and in this version it is actually a spinoff of
the cleveland show we're acting basically like we like the first we have had to just kind of
pretend like we call it virtual reality family guy but it is actually called the peter show
which we're saying is a spinoff of the popular character Peter Griffin. It's the Cleveland show from Cleveland's
neighbor's perspective.
The more you guys describe
the show, the less I understand
what it is, to be honest.
That's the opposite of what should be
happening. You should be
hearing the details that we're providing
you and understanding it
more and more. Would it be helpful to get in
the suit, Peter?
I can't see why it would be helpful to get in the suit, Peter? I can't see why it would be helpful to get in a suit,
with all due respect.
I kind of don't also want to get in that suit.
It sounds like it's very hot and uncomfortable.
It sounds...
Okay.
The sounds it's making are completely unrelated
to the temperature of it.
Yeah.
What's that clicking?
One of those sounds is the cooling mechanism
which has been acting a little funky.
Yes. The clicking noise is
the tongue sheath that has
to be constantly releasing taste
or else
the taste
flow will get clogged.
You want to hear the clicking, Peter.
If you stop hearing the clicking
get out of there because i don't think i want to no longer going to allow your mouth to retain
let's talk about the fail safe let's talk about how you get out i don't want to do this i'm
thinking it's you're just describing a lot of things that i don't want the whole the sheath
mouth sheath and then you're constantly getting taste? It's a tongue sheath. Okay, but it's just like taste of what?
Like air?
Taste of whatever family guy or his cohorts are eating.
To get out, you must find Quagmire.
Quagmire is the key out of the experience.
He will obviously be like when you meet him in the
show he'll be in the guys like he's horny and stuff or whatever yeah but if you go to him and
say quagmire i'm having big problems i need to get out he will drop the act and just be like okay
let's work together let's find our way out of go yeah get in his car through the exit yeah yes you do have to get in his car he will yeah
he is still gonna be a little he's quagmire he is still gonna be a little bit horny yeah that's
not all for the show that you know they cast him partially because he was so horny uh and uh but he will drive you to a new location outside of rhode island he'll drive you to logan
airport at which point you will fly back to los angeles where you live and then you can kind of
resume your normal life as peter in the experience and kind of reassemble it as closely as possible you
don't have to be in in quahog anymore no not at all you'll be in the experience but like in a
version of los angeles in your life it'll be a lot more comfortable if you freak out which
honestly you don't that's not going to happen but we want you to be prepared if it does happen okay find quagmire you'll get in his car obviously he's gonna be you know he'll be he'll
be horny but you know he'll help you get get to the airport and you can go home uh okay uh i mean
okay well what's the first step i guess i mean i'll give it a shot is at any point can i just
take the thing off my head and be like hey okay that's done thank you so much for asking that no well it's not really an issue
because we thought we got this question you can't no you can't just pull it off i mean yeah yeah
no you can't like physically i can't or like i shouldn't oh boy uh i i would recommend that you don't you won't be able to so you can't and also you
really shouldn't so that's a vote that's a yes okay uh all right jesus christ fellas again i
gotta say it doesn't sound great it doesn't sound super fun i kind of came on this you know to talk
to you guys you guys have a great show i'm a big fan but now i'm kind of like i still kind of came on this to talk to you guys. You guys have a great show. I'm a big fan, but now I'm kind of like
I still
kind of don't know what's going on.
You're a fan of Virtual Reality Family Guy,
but you don't know what it is.
You have a great show, which is
Virtual Reality Family Guy.
I'm a fan of you guys.
This is what we do. This is our work.
This is our passion.
Okay. All right right i understand that
uh i don't look i'm a team player i i don't want to be you know i'm not going to poop in anybody's
fishbowl or whatever you that's american dad what you're talking about is american dads
yeah that was an expression i was just using an expression and And Roger will poop in it sometimes. We can give you that
experience.
If you want to be Roger,
that's actually probably okay.
We'd make a couple adjustments
to the Brian suit, obviously.
You know what?
I'm afraid that the further
you adjust that suit, the worse it's going to get
for the person that's wearing it.
What's the first step?
Your eyes flutter open further you adjust that suit, the worse it's going to get for the person that's wearing it. What's the first step? What's the first step here?
Your eyes flutter open.
You wander into the
kitchen where Meg
is eating cereal.
The Meg
rendering is not complete
yet.
She will
look like a T-10001000 type that's the closest
like thing i can uh like the closest parallel but got her huge with like extra almost like
vitruvian man like has like multiple kind of like shadow limbs versions of herself okay it doesn't
sound like anything like the meg that i've seen on the show it sounds like the terminator the exoskeleton inter-skeleton terminator thing well he just said has way more
limbs and they are like kind of shooting out more limbs the limbs are shooting out and then the head
rotates a full 360 degrees do not let her see you get your food yes that's totally normal you know it's fine this is
your kitchen you know your family guy's dog so you're you're allowed to be there the head is
rotating in such a way that you can time it yeah time it so when she's looking away you're always moving in an arc like
right along with the back of her skull it's going to allow you to go around the kitchen get whatever
you need and get right back to the door and now we've got some breakfast right okay all right and
what might brian say you know when he's got his breakfast um this is great i've been hungry all night
okay yeah yeah i could see that being pretty funny do you want me to like say jokes or just
kind of say what i would say in this i mean we envision the show as a comedy you know because
family guy is so associated with like laughs and comedy. And it was part of why we wanted you,
you know,
Carl said you were so funny and.
Well,
thank you again.
But this is kind of a different situation.
Okay.
How about this?
Okay.
Brian,
I come in.
I'm like,
what's up?
Finally.
I've been hungry all night.
Yeah.
I haven't been hungry all night since.
Yeah. Since. Maybe it's like, hungry all night yeah i haven't been this hungry all night since oh yeah since
maybe it's like i haven't been this hungry since you know
thanksgiving not really thanksgiving is when they actually give you food
yeah so maybe something recent you know how people get very hungry before thanksgiving
like you're always like hungry before thanksgiving okay that. That's not what you said, but okay.
So it's before Thanksgiving.
I mean,
it's hungry since before Thanksgiving,
we cut away to that.
Yeah.
Right.
Okay.
Maybe before the first Thanksgiving.
And we do,
and we like,
but,
and we do a cutaway to,
it's like the pilgrims and stuff.
The pilgrims, we have not finished the rendering on
yeah don't have them and can't seem to make a turkey either so we're probably gonna just have
that be yes the pilgrim sex organs are right now not super uh polygon rich They're very sharp.
When you flash back to this
cutaway,
don't let any
of them... If they're turning
towards you, you will need to get out of the way
or just turn with them. You can jump
over them. Some of the sex
organs are low-hanging and some of them
are high, so you will need to jump over
them. Whether you jump or duck is going to be yeah so these are individually functioning sex organs like it's
like a penis again they are not functioning right now no i mean they're functioning in terms of
they're so sharp that like they could serve the function of slicing you to bits but they're not
functioning uh for sexual purposes it's and we probably don't
need them to because it really is just a virtual reality series right uh okay and then uh fellas
i'm really trying to do my best to sort of keep up with this uh yeah this has been actually going
really really well like the breakfast thing some of the lines you were giving brian the dog were making me actually crack up oh really okay so that's what got us that's what got us that's
got us to thanksgiving you know the first thanksgiving so it's the pilgrims and maybe um
uh one of the pilgrims eats so much he has to loosen the buckle on his hat
why would he why would he loosen the buckle on his hat but why would he loosen the buckle on his hat?
Why does he have that buckle?
It's just something about the
buckle on the hat. That feels
like we have to do something with it.
Yeah.
He goes, man, I'm going to eat a lot today.
It just doesn't make any
sense because why would he not unbuckle his
buckle on his waist?
You could pitch something. You could pitch something i mean you could pitch something then okay all right i'll pitch it uh uh you know
the guy says man i ate so much and he takes this off his shoes i don't know fuck um no uh it's hard
when you're on the spot you know i'm not saying it's hard when you're on the spot uh no i know i
know especially when it's not really a collaboration we're not supporting each other's ideas like um
it doesn't
seem like we are no uh with all due respect i don't want them to take so i'm thankful for the
opportunity to use these pilgrims who have basically turned on each other so far in our
process on this and so like maybe giving them an assignment will like help the situation and
they're in their part of the universe that we're rendering but yeah you
do not want them to take off their shoes because their toes will they're not like they're attached
they're only secured by the shoes right now and they have a velocity they will spray out and this
could be a good cutaway though so you go i haven't been this hungry since before the first thanksgiving
we zap you back in time you're surrounded by these pilgrims you go hey guys any idea when
the food's gonna be ready two of them spin and turn towards each other each pierce one another
with their sex organs blood sprays everywhere and they start screaming like one's head is severed
off and the other one is like chopped in half at the waist and then you're
just like uh never mind that you kind of tiptoe out of there that to me feels like okay now we're
right back in the living room and you're enjoying your breakfast that's what it's gonna have to be
or honestly you'll regenerate so like if you don't get it the first time you'll regenerate
exactly at least where you were at the beginning of this. You'll go back to
the kitchen.
You do that.
You go to the cutaway.
You can just
keep doing it. You have to keep doing it.
Yeah.
Okay.
Brian's got his breakfast.
Brian's got his breakfast.rian's got his breakfast we go back in time the pilgrims are
killing each other using each other's genitals that's the cut that's the cutaway yeah i think
no i'm with all due respect fellas i didn't because i didn't understand it it comes literally
out of nowhere it's like hyper violent and it has nothing to do with the i okay fine
it's you guys a show if you guys dig it so next i'm in i'm i'm back at the house i fucking dig
it that's funny shit man hey any idea when the food's gonna be ready ah you know that's the kind
of random humor they might do in one of those kind of ways yeah you don't want to be ahead of it. You don't want to be ahead of
it, right? But you don't want to be way behind
it either and just be like, I don't know
what the concept here is.
Again, so you guys are show
you know what you're doing.
I trust that.
Is it better if instead of the Pilgrims, it's like
the California Raisins?
No. Both make no
sense.
I mean, I think if it's less violent
it may be better. I feel like you don't know
the show. I just...
I feel like we're starting just from
a place of like... I haven't been this hungry
since I spent Thanksgiving with the California
Raisins. One of the raisins turns around,
sex organs severs the other raisin.
Okay. Here's the thing. I know
that there's non-sequiturs
on the show but a non-sequitur to this extent i haven't seen where it's literally it sets up a joke
and then does something completely different again like maybe you guys don't know what i do
well i would say i i'm you know what i'm thinking is hey why is this guy so hungry
having you know having thanksgiving with the California Rays?
Did they not serve him food or anything?
The answer is, right before, I guess, the food was ready, there was a horrific, violent incident.
I can't imagine.
I mean, certainly, you'd probably lose your appetite at that point.
And also, it's pretty rude to then continue serving of serving yourself if one of the reasons needs to
be brought to the hospital or more likely the morgue okay yeah so then that's a really hungry
day yeah that's a yes i guess i it's not it's not always funny to like explain a joke but i think
now that we have the kind of the logic which which is airtight, you're probably seeing like, oh, this was really funny what he said.
Hollywood Handbook.
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Hollywood Handbook.
Peter Bonifaz.
Yes, sir.
Tell us about what you're working on.
Where can we find you?
Well, you can find me on Instagram at pbanny, P-B-A-N-I.
I post little videos and, you know, hopefully you all will check it out and enjoy it.
You know, I'm coming back to the pandemic now, you know, just kind of getting back to work, getting back to the grind, so to speak.
Yeah, I feel so. I almost feel like you haven't been listening this whole time.
You're in the virtual reality family guy you were.
OK, all right.
So you weren't asking me as Peter Vandiver, as you asking me in the virtual reality.
We need this clip.
We're recording the Zoom.
This is going to be a clip for press.
Yeah.
So this is going to be.
Yeah, they'll probably be playing this at the ATX Festival.
You sure this is the best clip?
In just a couple of weeks.
It's just me being confused.
I'm not happy with the clip so far, but I do believe
we can get it.
And it's going to be, when we ask
what you're working on, be like,
I'm so excited about this project. I'm Brian.
We got this California
race that's cut away that you're going to fucking love.
Okay, yeah, I'll
do it. No problem.
Should I do it now?
Where can I find you? What have you been working on these on these days oh man i've been working on this great project uh this this
family guy virtual reality project there's this whole cutaway with the sharp genitals that you're
going to really like everyone dies in it but it's very funny um steps on the joke a little bit steps what
steps but you say i got this cutaway with the california raisins i i guess i'm intrigued you
say i got a cutaway with incredibly sharp genitals i go like well i'm ahead of the joke now you know
okay probably the california raisins are cutting each other with those
okay so okay i'll just say okay hey we got this funny joke with the california raisins can't wait
till you see it it's gonna surprise you and this is this is an interview with tom tucker you're
gonna be doing this in the show yeah in the world of the show you're gonna be interviewed by
tom tucker the news guy so this is why we have to be like prepped and like ready to do this and he is
going to be so loud we really have not gotten the levels on on this like fully rendered yet it's
very uncomfortable to do those scenes why is nothing rendered in this in this entire show
literally 90 kevin do you want to say do you want to say? Do you want to tell them why?
We've had to make budget cuts.
Excuse me.
There's no we. There's no we.
I am going
on an extended cruise.
Thank you.
And so
the project
has had to make cuts
to pay for this cruise.
Kevin, you don't think that's kind of like, with all due respect,
everybody deserves a little vacation.
We've been through a pandemic.
But if the cruise is hurting the progress and quality of the show,
why don't you use your own money for it?
I am for the first two weeks, but the next five months is is research what this is this is this is uh if i could give some
context to to defend kevin because i i i got upset as well it is the impractical jokers
cruise and he did promise to bring back some of their funniest jokes for us
you know and if they're you know even if they're crew specific
because it is vr we can just put brian the dog on a cruise and and he'd be able to do some of what
they're up to so in a way it is research for the show and the money will end up on screen ultimately
but for now what we're dealing with is tom tucker's way too loud california raisins slash the pilgrims have you know polygon genitals of the and the um and
meg meg meg you know terminator gonna kill you okay jesus christ uh one of the one of the jokes
that i got is a meme i don't know how we can use this but it's of the top image is of tom hanks
and castaway and he's like swimming away
from the island and the second one is his son chet hanks saying like dad come here and then
the third image is tom hanks like swimming back to the island going back yeah oh i see
see this so you see why we why we have to send him on this cruise yeah yes I guess you send him
on the cruise okay he goes on the
cruise but
a five month cruise
to research
characters for two weeks and then you said another
five months the only time people
go out to sea for that long
is to research
oceanotics is that a word
ocean on ocean oceanographers yeah that's one of our episodes is actually about that
okay well that makes sense that makes sense yeah i'm gonna be doing oceanotics he gets a job at
the oceanotics lab oh okay i still think i said i i said that phrase wrong but you know i guess
we all know what I'm talking about.
Fellas, I'm sorry.
I got to be completely honest.
I think this show idea is absolutely awful.
And I'm saying that because I respect both of you.
Carl's told me such great things.
I have listened to the show.
I'm fans of both of you.
I've seen your improv, your shows.
This really feels like it's coming out of a – You've seen Hayes' improv.
I don't do improv. Oh, you don't do improv him i could have swore i've seen you do improv but
so i don't do improv whatever you saw was meticulously scripted by yeah yeah
scripted by me that's right okay interesting uh anyway i just uh i'm kind of having trouble
with the concept of the show of the show it just
sounds uh it's you know it's let's just say if my dad saw the show he'd be like what the
what is this this is foolish okay well that's interesting you know um because we do need more
characters could your dad be in the show like could he ask what it is and then brian the dog
can sort of try to explain to him or
maybe give him an example that gets us another one of these good cutaways that you really helped us
come up with any any of the characters who you think he would be like especially
good to play yeah actually yeah let's get your dad in like a Stewie suit or something here.
To play Stewie?
I don't think you want him playing Stewie.
He has a very thick Iranian accent.
There's no way he can do a British accent.
That might protect us a little bit from what we expect to be a pretty lengthy legal battle.
It would be great to be able to point to this character.
great to be able to point to this character. We've already
made a lot of physical
changes
to some of our results
as with some
other characters of...
Some rendering issues.
But some of it was intentional
that we did want Stewie to be
an adult.
Yeah.
Here's the thing. You want Stewie to be stewie though right because if my
dad does it this is what's going to sound like hey hello i am a stewie i love to i love to try to
kill my mother it doesn't sound like stewie whatsoever it sounds like my father trying
desperately to play a character that he knows nothing about. I think
that is actually perfect.
That's probably better than what we're going to do.
If I was a fan
of the show, which I am,
watching this program you guys are talking about,
I would go, what the hell?
How is any... I mean, Meg is
a fucking Terminator robot.
There's
people killing each other with their polygon unrendered
genitals loud yeah tom tucker yeah he's right so okay and then we're doing that tom tucker's loud
i mean you really are you telling me you really can't fix the and stewie stewie's an adult. Stewie's an adult and
his...
We've got the rendering on some kind of cycle
where his
nipples kind of burn off
and...
Smolder and burn.
And regenerate.
What kind of rendering cycle is that?
The setting is just like... We haven't been able to get it just right. This is that the setting is just like we haven't been
able to get it just right this is actually the least distracting version we've found
because when they come back in they're not so pointy but they do uh yeah they sort of
smolder they become like uh you know uh sort of burning charcoal and ash and then they uh
blow away to dust and then they come back in uh you know somewhat normal
honestly so this is rated x this program is rated x i actually think the human nipple is normal
i don't think it's something that we have to be providing from those sustenance you know yeah exactly it's one of the foundations of human life
so to me it's rated x for extremely normal yes i i mean uh x for extremely normal that would be
an x yeah the x yes for exists you know that would be two both those words are yeah both those words these are already taken
and it's for that's what they
that's a rating for video games for babies
so he's for everyone yeah
he's for
okay I would say that the penis part
that the genital part is probably the part you're gonna do
it's not recognizable as a penis
and not even close we just said
the sex organs yeah
and then that's it then
the show's done uh i didn't want it to be you know but um i don't have a ton of say i don't
have a lot of other ideas uh the stuff you were giving me with your dad actually was the most
inspired i felt in a while and you seem to already be off of it. How old is your dad? My dad is 71.
Stewie is a 71-year-old Iranian man
just to be able to point to that
and the nipples thing that we already have going.
If your dad is okay with that happening to him...
That saves us.
Yeah.
I can promise you,
I don't even need to talk to him,
but I can guarantee he's not going to be okay with his nipples burning off and stuff.
He's like me.
In my family, all the men in my family have desperately sensitive nipples.
Whenever I've gone to the doctor, even if he twerks them a little bit,
I'm like, God, please, this isn't, you know.
Even if the doctor does a little twerk on it.
Just a little one.
If the doctor's doing just a minor...
He's not fully...
Twerking on it? No, he's not fully twerking on it.
But even a slight twerk to a sensitive nipple is painful.
I'm sorry, I don't want to go down the road talking about my family's nipples,
but my point is my father won't agree to that.
He won't agree to that.
He won't let...
So then he's going to have to be Lois.
He's going to...
Yeah.
Which actually could be...
Her nipples on the show are basically like
so heavy
as to be like basically invincible.'re not going anywhere yeah so thick yeah
are you sure that that's just not weird and like inappropriate just like suddenly this
cartoon character that everyone likes i'm sure it's got these they're what are they thick like
leather nipples talking about the nipples
being weird.
I'm sure it's not. We all got them.
We do all got them, but we
also all poop, and we don't go
around showing each other our poop. I don't
walk around with a bowl of my
poop in my...
On Lois, you'll be able to see it because her
stomach or her intestines are visible
through her...
It's all transparent
like her body and clothes yeah this is another is another rendering issue no no this was a choice
creative choice that we wanted to be able to see her internal functions just to say like hey this
is okay like yes we eat we process the food we generate waste. This is a cycle that we're all a part of,
and it's been taboo for so long.
I think we're finally breaking down
some of these hang-ups that society has
about the most normal body functions.
Hard nipples, nipples burning off, stomach.
Nipples burning off is not, no,
that's not a basic human function.
That's an accident.
The heaviness thing so
like this is actually potentially an issue in the kitchen stage where you're in the kitchen
lois's nipples being so heavy and like she's like getting everywhere face down on the ground just
kind of like pushing with her legs like just because of our gravity settings are
all messed up with these nipples and they're like they're those are not coming off the floor
so she is going to be sort of like shoving herself forward and if you are in the kitchen
and you see her coming in you need to get out of the way but also in the same you know like keeping track of meg's
field of vision if that makes sense but you can see meg's field of vision make it easier for you
you're welcome yeah is projecting out in a way that like okay i know what she's seeing
at this time or yeah because she has like beams coming out of her eyes yeah
she's being coming out of
her i mean you know as someone who's a fan of the show i've watched the show a long time uh
this show will completely destroy everything that everyone ever liked about family guy on top of
that is that a good thing and is that a good thing no because yes but you're using the you're using the intellectual property
of somebody else without their consent so you're also gonna have a huge lawsuit on your hands
honestly anytime we need to if we start getting sued in the real world or whatever
yeah we can just jump in there we escape into the virtual reality family guy world which
you know we're sort of masters of the universe in there yeah we we have all the like codes and everything to get inside the walls
and and people are like oh like is it something where you like if you die in there you die for
real it's like no of course that's stupid you can't die in this world ever it never ever ever
is over no it never ends if forever it's you exist forever in there how would you hide in this world ever it never ever ever is over no it never ends if forever it's you exist forever
in there how would you hide in the world because if somebody wanted to serve you court documents
they could just come and serve you they don't care that you're wearing a fucking thing over your face
uh well they wouldn't be able to see me if i was wearing the thing over my face it wouldn't be able
to know who i was i'm not able to interact with them
to accept this thing being served to me or whatever.
And how would I hide?
I don't think they'd be looking for me at your apartment.
That's the interesting thing to me.
Yes, that's the other thing.
I just go like, we're not that close.
So I think that when I show up there in my suit,
there's going to be very few people that connect those dots.
I mean, what if there's a knock on your door,
either of your door, let's say Sean.
It's your door.
It's your door.
We're going to be at your place.
I will be at your house, yeah.
Okay, at your house, whatever, wherever you are.
I'm at your house. Who are you saying your house whatever wherever you are i'm at your house
who are you who are you saying that to are you saying to peter okay you're at my house fine yeah
okay you're at my house somebody comes and says hi is sean clements are you sean clements
and what and what do i say i go no i'm stewie oh well i mean okay well my point is they can
still serve you i don't know why i went down this road but like they can still serve you can still
get in trouble you can still get sued that's all that look at what hubert has been doing on that
show for so long he's like he's a sexual predator that's and i don't see anyone like bringing him to
justice and i don't like it no this is how this world works you think then we're gonna come for me
over him a copyright violation when hubert is out there that seems like they got bigger fish to fry
because they're you know they're really not dealing with some of the larger issues. And his name, so of course I'm a real
family guy. His name is Herbert.
But at our version...
His name will be Huber and ideally he will look
like Cuber, which is another workaround
that we have.
He's still going to be a potential
child molester?
We can't stop the rendering from doing that.
You can't stop
the rendering from him being a child molester?
When I tell you every dial you can imagine,
I've turned up and down all the little sliders.
I've touched him.
No matter what you do, he ends up.
That's just in his bones.
What company did you guys outsource the rendering to?
Because it sounds like they're doing an awful fucking job.
It was Ed Rod.
The company is called Kevin Computers.
Okay. So Kevin's doing it. Kevin, you're doing all the rendering kevin's doing it kevin you're doing it yeah okay you're doing it my man you're doing an awful job doing his renderings with all due respect
the entire thing is supposed to be rendered and half the things aren't rendered i'm so happy to
hear somebody else say this because i i you know i think i had it become normal to me we had we
had compromised at so many points along the way
that I started to really focus on the positive,
just that we were kind of getting the show off the ground.
But hearing you say that, I go,
you know, there actually are a number of rendering issues with the show.
As I'm having to even explain it, it stacks up in this way.
But I think for me, I think if we come up in this way. But I think what,
you know,
for me,
I think if we come up with two or three more solid cutaways,
we can be out.
I mean,
you should just hit us with one,
just really quick,
just really quick,
two or three cutaways and then we'll be out.
Two,
three cutaways.
And then let's,
and as,
as,
as Brian,
as Brian,
right.
Okay.
So the cutaway, Brian is, let's say he's at home, you know, he right? Okay, so cut away.
Brian is, let's say he's at home.
He likes to drink.
He's drinking.
He's like, man, this reminds me of when I was hanging with Charlie Sheen.
And then we cut to him and Charlie Sheen drinking like a gallon of isopropyl alcohol together.
And they both start throwing up.
Okay, that's going to be an issue.
Why would that be an issue why would charlie
sheen it's just that specific thing we're totally in the right area it's really charlie sheen
rendering is gonna react with the ice purple alcohol in a way like that is essentially going
to ignite the air in this world and It's going to consume all of the artificial
oxygen.
It's a funny idea.
It's a really funny idea.
What if instead of Charlie Sheen, it was one of the
California Raisins?
You just keep bringing the California Raisins.
There's just nothing to me funny about the California Raisins.
They are absolutely going...
You say you're a fan of the show.
I am a fan of the show. I am a fan of the show,
but in this particular
situation, I think it's less...
Okay, how about this?
Brian, he's drinking.
He was my... He reminds me of the time I drank
too much, and he's with one of the California Raisins.
They drink too much isopropyl alcohol,
and they throw up, and then it cuts back.
Or maybe it's like wine,
and the California Raisins is like,
that's my friend.
Hey, yeah.
You drink, that's my friend.
Okay.
Yeah, no shit, it's okay.
No, I don't. I'll be honest.
I still don't think it's funny and I'm the one that
came up with that.
That's what my friend says.
I get it.
I get it.
But it gets you where you're
going you know because he's made a yeah yeah right okay all right fine that's so that's one
second one that's one you know uh brian is uh is mean to meg i don't know just before you even
start let's not make it another california raisins thing because i don't think no you made it too
many times sean you, you brought it up
three separate times. You're the one that's
great.
Let's not go back to that.
Right. Let's not go back.
Fellas, let's not go back to that because you're the
Jesus Christ.
The other one,
Brian
wakes up. He's cooking breakfast.
He's like, hey, Meg, do you want breakfast?
She's like, sure, Brian.
And then he throws an egg on her.
It's a cutaway.
It's a cutaway.
It's a cutaway.
Oh, okay.
Cutaway.
Shit.
Okay.
He goes, hey, do you want eggs?
And she's like, boy, this is worse than last week's breakfast.
And last week's breakfast, the egg tried to attack her or chased her around the house.
The egg's big and strong. What? The egg's big and strong. like the egg tried to attack her or chased her around the house or like the egg had like strong
it what the eggs big and strong that's actually very helpful for the egg that we that we currently
have it's going to be doing that anyway so that is that's perfect that's awesome that's a really
cool idea she probably shouldn't be eating eggs in the first one just because we're not going to
be able to have an egg that doesn't do that. But she's eating.
I think we had talked about maybe some cereal.
Okay.
She goes, hey, look, I'm having cereal.
It's a lot better than the eggs I had last week.
And the egg kicks the shit out of her.
Cool.
I mean, she's T-1000.
So it's like, I think my money's on Meg. If she's a T's t1000 so it's like i think she's my money's on meg
if she's a t1000 why is she meg why can't why you are kevin you're paying kevin you're paying
kevin to render this stuff have him render it right this makes no sense meg is meg but she's
also t100 because kevin can't render it properly get it to someone else kevin no offense brother
but if you can't render properly have someone else do it you can't sorry i don't you can't render it properly, get it to someone else. Kevin, no offense, brother, but if you can't render it properly, have someone else do it.
I'm sorry. You can't say no offense
and then say hurtful words like that.
He does say all due respect and no offense
a lot. That was really,
really, really inappropriate, and I am
actually going to end the show.
No, wait a second.
You owe us a cutaway, but
we'll just deal with that off the air.
We'll take care of that off the air
we do not do that on the show we don't do the screaming i'll be outside and the rudeness and
now kevin is gonna kevin is now going kevin's gonna go for a walk yes he needs to cool down
and i don't fault him at all for that we'll take care of the the cutaway at a different time but
just a quick apology to kevin and then we'll be like kevin i'm really sorry man i i didn't mean it like that i guess i got a little
bit he's outside so you're gonna have to okay well kevin yeah kevin okay i mean why did you
have to tell me when i thought i had a second look i'll email him later and say kevin i'm sorry i
didn't he's outside he doesn't have email out there no he's what do you mean doesn't have email
he has access to email in general.
Do you want me to go outside and say something?
See? He's outside.
Kevin, are you there?
Yeah, what?
Kevin, I just wanted to say I'm sorry, man.
I didn't mean to be disrespectful.
I was just a little frustrated.
Does he look like he's upset, man?
He's sipping cocktails by the pool.
I'm on the cruise, baby. Okay, I guess... Oh, wow, okay, pool I'm on the cruise baby
okay I guess
oh wow okay you're already on the cruise
alright well I guess everything's all's well
that ends well
yeah okay well I'm sorry
about what I said man just keep doing what you're doing
you know I don't know how to render nothing so I guess
I shouldn't talk I just got frustrated
thank you
and so he finally admitted it
okay bye Thank you. Thank you. And so he finally admitted it. Okay, bye.
Bye.
Hollywood Handbook.
This week on the Patreon,
Carl and Hassan discuss opposing opinions, Sean welcomes Matt Apodaca back on the pro version,
and the Flager Ones are mostly talking all things basketball.
Check out these bonus podcasts and videos of the full episodes,
including today's with Peter at
patreon.com slash the flagger ones.
Hollywood Handbook.
That was a hate gun podcast.