Hollywood Handbook - Tony Hawk, Our Skateboarder Friend
Episode Date: March 31, 2020The Boys help TONY HAWK make the next Tony Hawk's Pro Skater video game.See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-...my-info.
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This is a HeadGum Podcast. How do we... The new normal is all this new stuff. Sorry, no, just could you
clarify what new territory?
Are you talking about the floor of the ocean?
I'm talking about the internet. Ah, yes.
Well, because the
large majority of the ocean is unexplored.
Sure.
More than of space, in fact.
Did you know that? Way more.
Way more.
We know way less about what is in our water but you
were talking about the internet a very short question do you know how to order a egg online
okay yeah i've been coming up against this too um i can i can get one it is um a tamagotchi egg so that is the thing i ran into as well
but yeah i can get dozens of those what i'm looking for is regular egg one egg trying to
make a cookie uh well you and i can go on this journey together i mean obviously we have a guest
i don't know if we want to dig in so hard on the egg delivery system now.
Yeah, we can come back to it.
Let's come back to it.
And he might be able to help.
He'll probably know more than I will.
So this is Hollywood Handbook and Insider's Guide to Kicking Butt and Dropping Names
in the Red Carpet Linebacker Hallways of this industry we call Showbiz.
What up, what up?
And it's Tony Hawk.
It's Tony Hawk here.
Hello, hello.
Tony, how do you want to be introduced?
Yeah, skateboarding.
Correct.
Is that the main thing?
Skateboarder.
Yeah, I don't know skateboard.
I'm not actively skateboarding right now,
so skateboarder works for me.
Could be interesting.
They don't know that, Tony.
Could have been good.
Tony, they don't know that?
Yeah.
We'll still have fun, but we could have have pretended i am doing kickflips as i speak
and thank you and i see that tony let's talk about let's not get too far
ahead of the audience let's talk about what skateboarding is skateboarding is it's very
almost like very low rise siamese rollerblades
now talk about this well that's a bit of the cart before the horse because uh i think skateboarding
came along much sooner than rollerblading ever did although it was a direct descendant of roller skates.
So, it comes full circle that way.
Talk about roller skates.
Roller skates are cool.
They're an inspiration to you, yes?
Yeah.
I mean, the first skateboards were made with roller skate trucks of wheels.
Like, literally pulling them off the bottom of shoes and nailing them on the
two by fours.
That was the first skateboard.
And the first skateboarder was a roller skater.
Whose shoe got tied together by a prankster.
I can't answer that.
I don't know.
Okay.
But I do,
I do know that,
um,
I went to Sierra Leone a long time ago,
uh,
like 15 years ago on a charity mission, and I brought my skateboard.
And the kids there had never seen a skateboard, and they called it Roller Boogie.
Roller Boogie.
And they said, I want to try the Roller Boogie.
Let me try Roller Boogie.
Which I thought was super cool.
It's better.
Yeah, it makes you think that we settled on skateboard a little too fast.
Everything about it is better.
Roller Boogie. Roller boogie.
Roller boogie was on the table.
Pro roller boogier.
Think about how much better your life would be if your entire career you'd been called a pro roller boogier instead of like skateboard.
Pressure, because that means you kind of got to dance, too.
Brother, you're telling me um so speaking of roller boogieing that actually gives me an idea for how to retitle the new tony hawk game we're obviously here to help you brainstorm we're gonna
design some aspects of the game uh it's a well-known franchise but it
could use a fresh coat of paint no one better than me and the haze man we've created a lot of
very famous very popular games on this show um fight haver the drive fast edition the
video game version of the film the Proposal? Or was it?
Is that right?
Oh, Indecent Proposal?
No, just regular proposal.
Although we're open to doing that one too.
That could be the sequel.
That's a great idea.
And so we're helping each other.
Oh, and we should double back.
Do you know how to order egg, Tony?
Egg?
Order an egg?
Yeah. How egg?
Well, if it's prepared, maybe. Not an egg in its shell.
Yes. No, you can't get it in the shell.
They only deliver it loose.
I went to the grocery store last week, and they had plenty of eggs.
And I thought, cool, I'll get two.
Should we be bragging about that?
Last week, it was a lot different than be bragging about that? Last week.
It was a lot different than this week.
Whole other world last week.
But I do have a big family.
I do need to get groceries.
It is essential.
And Kevin, can you say we recorded this two weeks ago so that last week is actually appropriate?
Hey guys, Chef Kevin here.
You got it.
I'll hold up like an old newspaper.
Perfect.
It's fine.
I will still own it.
I do need to get groceries
for my family.
Just marinating on this idea.
Is that a game?
Tony's big family
rolling for the addition.
And it's about
how Tony has to
manja his
whole family. Manja. They all to manja his whole
family
manja
they all must manja
this very
what like cannibals
no you don't manja them
I think he has used manja wrong
I think you can do that in the game
but then you lose if you eat your family
that's game over
there's probably a special code where you're allowed to do
that, but it is only for the citizens.
It's like a Grand Theft Auto cheat.
It's a patch.
Alright.
My story is that I went to the grocery store. I got two cartons
of eggs. I got to the front and the guy
removed one and said, you can only get one carton of eggs.
Wow.
Is that true?
No wonder there were plenty of eggs. and then he put it next to his
his um scanning thing like nope and that's a fake story or real that's a real story
land of the free huh bags aren't free
i wasn't trying to hoard them we are going to go through them
anyway you have a series of famous tweets
so you go through customs and people
recognize you
and they make comments to you, correct?
Yeah, or
the opposite where they look at my
ID and they see my name and they don't
connect the dots.
They know it's the same
name as the guy they know but they can't imagine
that it's actually me in front of them
it happened yesterday
and those are fake? those stories?
those are all real
why are you accusing me of all this fakery?
no we're helping you
this has never been put on record like this
yeah
do I need to exaggerate them and make them fake?
is that what you're saying?
well I guess what I'm saying is,
in the same way as bragging about the grocery store,
people are supposed to not be doing unnecessary travel right now.
So I think it is possible that those kind of tweets are doing real damage.
You must agree with that.
I will say that it happened to me yesterday,
and I refrained from
sharing it because i didn't want to because it implied that you were traveling yeah that i was
out and about and i was i was at the grocery store so even then it's going to drown itself
in the negativity of being out and about as opposed to just enjoying the interaction that did actually happen that was actually really funny.
And I just have to say that.
So by not posting it, in a way, the grocery store became a grocery store, didn't it?
It became what?
A grocery store because you experienced growth.
You exhibited real human growth.
Growth, yes.
Absolutely.
Your company is called The Bird's House, correct?
Birdhouse.
Birdhouse. This is because The Bird's House, correct? Birdhouse. Birdhouse.
This is because Hawk is a kind of bird?
Thank you. Yes.
You'd be surprised how many people don't connect that.
I'm still refusing to.
Tell me why it's named that.
Because I break apart birdhouses to make them into skateboards.
That's why.
Oh,
the birds have nowhere to live.
And now the birds are homeless.
Yeah.
Well,
the birds are laying their eggs in places where we can access them.
Yeah,
exactly.
So when Tony goes to the grocery store,
you only get one carton of eggs.
It's okay.
The birds are laying their eggs on the ground now because he broke all the bird houses. The ultimate supremacy of man over nature.
You got it. That's a powerful message for this day and age that we will prevail. Humanity's tough.
We've beaten the birds. We've taken their homes. And so what is some little crazy,
you know, microscopic bug that's creeping around for us to defeat now.
But I do want to get to the game.
And the game is Tony's Big Family Roller Boogie Edition, Maja style.
We obviously, I noticed in some of these games, we kind of get dropped right into the skateboarding,
which is maybe the least interesting part.
We don't really get a backstory of why are we
skateboarding why now where were we yesterday and what were we doing the day before and where we go
to school and so we do want to try to instill uh the message of like let's tell the story of who
this person is and if we get to the skateboarding great that would you know that'll be fun at the
end of the game but let's sort of set the foundation so that we can build a house that lasts.
Did you go to college, Tony?
I did not.
Not yet.
There you go.
Never too late.
That's the answer.
The answer is not yet.
I got to remember that that we do believe in you
thank you wow i gotta work on my applications now when some of these yahoos made college free
you know what's gonna stop you yeah exactly no everybody can go then tony hawk can go my sat
stores no it's true for the right price it's true it's true so yeah
no we should work on your application so i guess the first when you open like the load screen of
the game it'll say like starting application and then we'll fill out our college applications
um yeah there's probably a personal essay portion uh that you can write as part of the game. Maybe like, Oh yeah. What's a summer that changed your life? Yeah. Is there like a summer experience that changed your life or made you appreciate your family more, you know, and we could write that out. Do you have like a, a story like that, that we could help prompt people to type into the game?
a story like that that we could help prompt people to type into the game wow um yeah but i feel like i shouldn't give them any hints okay like they've got to figure it out for
themselves one hint one little hint it's so tiny a tiny hint could just be the name of like a seed
or something yeah we took all the kids we took all the kids to Iceland a couple years ago.
That's Lola.
She's mad that the wind is blowing.
She doesn't like it.
Me too.
That really makes me insane.
Yeah.
Well, mostly it frightens her.
Read the room, wind.
Even though she's a scary beast.
Exactly.
You know what I mean?
Now's not the time.
It's not about you right now.
No, my dog is mad right now, too.
Apparently, on my street, there's another dog.
Oh, that's crazy.
Yeah, well, that's what he said.
He's been going, no way, right?
Yeah, it's been a big conversation between all of us.
I bet.
So, yeah, if you don't want to give a hint about the summer that you had.
No, he said Iceland.
Oh, I said, yeah, we took all the kids to Iceland a couple years ago,
and it was fun, and there were a few challenges we met with,
and we all kind of came through it better
rotten shark did you eat the fetid shark uh i have but not that trip not in iceland
just i i did have at home yes i in iceland i did have it's not penguin but what is it called um
uh chicken what's the other no the other type of penguin ah dolphin you know i'm talking about
yes yes yes it doesn't matter puffin puffin yes puffin meat i i had I had an Icelandic tasting menu and they served puffin.
Barbara's organic puffins.
Yeah, it's cereal.
It's not good.
It's really not good.
Puffin's no good?
Yeah.
No, peanut butter ones are okay.
Brett has...
So Brett's holding a guitar.
Brett is locked and loaded right now.
This is Brett.
Tony, this is Brett.
Hey, Tony. It's nice to meet you you i'm just here ready if you need me i have you know i'm a big fan of the games and when i
when i heard the the college application screen to me that got ideas really turning like yeah i'd
love to hear what does the college application screen sound like?
And maybe even you could, if you have the chops, you could riff us all the way into checking into the dorm room and getting set up and then kissing our parents goodbye.
Oh, wow.
Wow.
Like.
Okay. okay all right nice where are we in the game now okay well i've just filled i've just written a little
essay about how i i guess didn't eat rotten shark even though that's what it's famous for.
And then now I am like setting up my lava lamp.
I'm putting up my Fight Club poster that's in Italian.
I'm I'm setting up some really funny like Funko Pops and stuff like some obscure ones for people to discuss when they come in.
That's pretty. I feel like that is a pretty peppy tune, though.
You've got to be doing that quickly.
Oh, yeah, yeah.
No, we've got to rush through this because we have so much to do
before we even get to the character learning about what a skateboard is.
Yeah, it's kind of like in Mario when you're running out of time,
it gets really fast.
Right, yeah. really fast. Right.
Yeah.
That's my daughter.
I honestly think that's one of my daughter's biggest fears is when the music starts getting so doomed like that.
Mm-hmm.
When it's just basically a video game saying you're fucked.
No, don't put her in the army.
No offense.
Because it's much scarier in the army.
I'm not.
No, the army's way scarier than Mario.
Army.
And so all the Funko Pops are set up,
and then your roommate comes in to be like,
Hey, what's up?
And it is a whole family.
So it's kind of this new modern instant family
that we see now in 2020 where like you go to college and your roommates are a woman and a
lot of children right this is something that is happening now okay i didn't know that well because you
didn't go but you don't know yeah but i guess i'm going soon yeah well when you go now you'll
actually be prepared because hayes is kind enough to explain to you that your roommate is often
a woman several children and possibly she's she's going to college the whole family is
everybody is so they're like a bunch of doogie housers they're sort of they're all like one
unit so like they are essentially one doogie houser they all take classes together they all
take tests together as as a as a unit the family is one
and they get one diploma at the end is how it works and lola as well gets to go okay that's a
lot of explaining do you think that's going to be difficult for people to understand in the video
game yeah i feel like that storyline is is little getting a little complicated. That your roommate's an entire family that's attending college as a single student?
As a collective one student, yeah.
I don't want to be offensive, Tony.
I mean, you're not the audience for this.
You're maybe slightly out of touch with the people who are playing your games
who probably are dealing with this firsthand almost every day.
Yeah, I'm not the demo
okay i get that yeah i'm just trying to get to the action that's all dude yes and i would like
to do that too and for me the action is signing up for classes i see like it's figuring out like
okay what what can i take that's for me And what can I take that's for my future?
Because I don't want...
And can you get in?
I do know that.
I mean, I have kids in college, so at least I get that.
Yeah.
It's impossible to get the classes you want.
Yeah.
But here's the thing, Tony.
You don't have to decide everything right now.
You don't have to...
You're just starting college.
You don't have to pick...
The courses you take now are not the career you're going to have for the rest of your life. Right. You don't have to. You're just starting college. You don't have to pick. It's not the courses you take now
are not the career you're going to have
for the rest of your life.
Right.
You don't have to have it all planned out.
Yeah.
Don't put that pressure.
Most people change majors
13 times in their first year of college.
All right.
And they change careers twice that much
in their second year of college.
How do you get high scores?
High scores? Yeah. Well well in the game study unfortunately there's no substitute oh i see you know
kids that are actually in college are going to play the video game about being in college
and spend equal amounts of time on that so don't you think that would reflect their real life yeah no it is this is how they will be going to college as well yeah this is so imagine this
tony there's all like you buy a game for like whatever three hundred dollars whatever these
things cost now and you play the game and it has no meaning to your life. Not relatable doesn't apply.
We can create a game that people will,
that costs a college tuition.
And it is college.
And you are taking this,
you're playing this game
and you are taking college and going to college.
And at the end, when you graduate the game,
you walk up, you hand it to your boss
and you say, I'm ready to work now.
Wow. Okay. So that financially, it's going to be better for us. All right. We're replacing
college. I know you want to grind the rail, but some of these people have to put their nose in
the, to the grindstone and actually read a book. Oh. And so what about textbooks in the yeah that's sold separately
of course you do you do the game has a an in-game bookstore and it is ultimately just a list of
directions to take you to the actual bookstore we're still working out the kinks with some of it
like lola lola we don't have figured out bre got it Brett's like a huge music guy
and so when I make a joke about how
the kinks and Lola
and able to put that together
in a freaking nanosecond
Brett is like right there
and then you see me nod my head
really exaggeratingly
because I got it
okay ice cream mixture
so is your roommate a cross dresser is that what
you're saying no so this is and we're really gonna need to establish that this was recorded
several weeks ago kevin just so that we're totally in the clear i believe that the song lola is about
a man wearing women's clothing is Is that correct? Yeah. Yes.
Brett? I mean...
I'm not trying to offend anyone. That's actually
what the song is about.
I don't have a problem with that.
But is it offensive
to name your...
to name your dog after that?
Oh. Well, my
oldest son named her, and so I don't know
what the reference was.
Hmm. Oh, wait. I'm playing Ape Man.
It could be that other Lola song, though.
Yeah.
Yeah, Brett, play that.
The other Lola song?
Yeah, play it now.
What's the other one?
Play it.
Isn't there another one, Brett?
Are you thinking of Layla, buddy?
Oh, yeah, it might be. Sorry. Brett, will you play Layla, buddy? Oh, yeah, I might be.
Sorry.
Brett, will you play Layla, please?
Yeah, good luck with that.
Say Lola instead.
Good luck with that.
Tony thinks he can't play it.
That seems more difficult than the Kinks.
Is that coming through?
A little bit.
Oh, yeah, that's it.
You got it.
All right.
Did you shower today, Brett?
Oh, there you go.
Wow.
Oh, okay.
Did you shower today? Good luck with that, huh?
Good luck with that.
I did not shower today, Hayes.
Oh, I could tell because there's some
stank on that.
Plenty of stank on the riff, brother.
That sounded good.
Thank you. It's by Eric Clapton.
He's one of the original
founders of the blues.
Thank you.
And so we're learning a lot
and I feel like I'm in college almost as we design this game.
Can I teach a class on the blues?
I think that would be nice.
Yeah.
Just something that we should have the student actually attend the class.
So downloadable content upgrades.
DLC.
Yeah.
In-game purchase.
Yeah.
In-game purchase. More yeah in-game purchase more revenue stream
good idea brett that's so smart so yeah so i'm gonna go ahead and click and i'm gonna pay like
300 or whatever it is to um get my like blues class from brett and now my guy is going and
learning about the blues but Brett you have to say like some facts and stuff
like talk about
no man blues is about listening
it's about feeling it
you don't talk about
facts with the blues
you either have it or you don't
okay that's
disappointing for me as someone taking the class that I already paid for.
Yeah, just to find out that you either have it or you don't.
But the only way you know you have it is to listen to me play it and you either feel it or you don't, right?
Or you drop out.
Or you drop out.
Look to your left.
Look to your right
now look back at me don't look at your right anymore listen to me okay yeah stop look at
your left for the rest of class don't look there anymore look at me i'm the teacher
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And a lot of them hang out on the quad in front of Earth House where all the environmentally conscious students live.
I'm going to select to purchase my tie-dye shorts for an extra $300 or whatever it is so that my character will fit in when we appear there.
When I arrive at Ultimate Frisbee, I have the option to have a conversation or just try to get in the game.
What do you select, Kevin?
I'm going get in the game.
Okay, you grab the Frisbee and huck it way too hard.
It goes flying and no one can find it.
Everyone's mad at you.
Damn it.
Do I got to start over?
Yep.
You have to fill out a whole new essay.
So there should be a skateboarding element in this?
Okay.
It seems like we're jumping the gun. i think i go here in college it's
just to get to class that's it that could be the coolest way to get to class yes so you are a
skateboard you go to college with your uh your master the owner and they when they get to college they they lean you up against the wall
behind the door and you're like disappointed because they're like meeting other friends and
they've met this whole family now that's their roommate and they're not as focused on you
the skateboard anymore and you miss them and you're like collecting dust behind the door
and maybe you're meeting like other stuff that's back there, like a tennis ball or something.
But then he starts like taking you to class.
That's cool.
And so you hit the A button to just kind of like gently kick the skateboard along to class.
Yeah.
And then you can take out other people's shins on the way and and and how do you
do this with your with your foot or you just use the skateboard you run into their shin you just
you just kind of misdirect him so the nose runs into different shins or we call it a shark bite if you go behind the ankle.
Iceland.
Yeah.
Could be an interesting... Take a big bite of shark in Iceland, huh?
I'm just bringing it around.
No, but yeah, you bark their shins,
and I guess we want to design the deck for the skateboard.
Obviously, it's not just going to be a plain wooden surface.
It could be a still image from the film Finding Neverland.
Okay.
You know what I mean? Just
something to say,
hey, I'm
a lover of film.
I obviously want to know my history,
but the movie about
the life of J.M. Barrie,
Finding Neverland. Did you see this Tony?
have you watched that?
no
now that is fake
and now of course
I saw leaving
Neverland I didn't see Finding Neverland
okay
well you have to find it first
so that is
so that is out of order okay
i think there are two entirely different um concepts though it's a 2004 historical fantasy
drama film it was directed by mark forrester okay thank you seven nominations at the
77th Academy Awards.
So we're back in 2004, and you're saying, okay, seven nominations.
Somehow I need more nominations.
Maybe an eighth nomination and I go check out the flick.
Maybe.
At that point, your body's a little too high.
Maybe I think it's just too played out.
Maybe I think I got too much attention, and I am here holding it down.
Okay.
I see.
think it got too much attention and i am here holding it down okay well what's the what's the underrated very secret movie you saw in 2004 instead of finding neverland that we can direct
our audience to go and check out oh man i don't have that on my fingertips okay and he's lying
again you're you're all looking up everything and i'm just here. I am fully fixated. You have my full attention.
I'm not out like searching the internet for other facts and directors and nominations,
but I will if you want.
Champa would carry water.
No, no, no.
It's fine.
I want you in the moment, man.
So Semper in presente.
I think that you.
Oh, okay.
2004.
I got it.
Shaun of the Dead.
There you go. I looked it up.
Okay. That's my 2004 movie.
And that's because my name's Shaun and you wish I was dead?
Yeah. I wish you were
in the zombie apocalypse.
Well, I'm pretty close to it these days.
Yeah, that's my choice.
There you go.
That movie...
Is good.
Is pretty good. It's not scary scary enough i wasn't scared at all
okay what i remember is keeping my eyes open and staying and not getting under my seat because i
was feeling just actually not scared even a little bit during it so So I was laughing, but mostly at how unscary it was.
Well,
it's fake.
I was screaming fake at the screen.
Almost the entire thing is fake.
Every time someone died or got hurt,
I was screaming fake.
Oh my God.
That's so fake.
And so I remember everyone else in the theater having a good time because of
the energy I was able to bring to it.
But I don't remember the film itself, really.
Strange not to mention Eurotrip, which also came out in 2004 and was real and is a movie that actually did happen.
Do you remember Eurotrip?
Kind of.
Fred Armis is bothering him on the train.
Oh, no, I didn't see that.
Okay.
Was that because I think they either are about to go to college at the movie?
Is that right?
Yeah, I just fanned all the college movies.
It's the last trip before college, yeah.
Yeah.
I can see why you weren't a fan.
Yeah.
We should pick some songs.
Please.
We have to do new songs for the game.
Stuff that's like new.
But they should sound like songs we know.
No, I mean like new songs.
I don't want to be too weird.
Oh, you mean like new songs that have never been in the game before,
but are existing songs.
Well, we could also do new songs.
Do you want to? Brett's good at songs. Brett can do songs. Well, we could also do new songs. Do you want to?
Brett's good at songs.
Brett can do songs.
Thanks, man.
Tony, do you want to create a little bit of the soundtrack?
I feel like you're checked out on the game.
It seems like the college thing is not connecting for you.
You're really pushing to get to the action,
but I don't know what you think that is
if we're not attending class and earning a degree
so that we can get a better job.
I threw in the skating, the taking out pedestrians the skating skating to class
that's right i guess that's that's my wheelhouse that shit was epic that was epic wind sauce no
that i was like so if we can get maybe we can get the music to that segment i would be happy
okay wheelhouse could have been a better more accurate name for your company. And while the secret of it, that it is like a bird and hawk and stuff, was very easy for me,
for some people, it was very confusing.
And now, wheelhouse, we're understanding that because that's basically what a skateboard is.
Yeah.
We make more skateboards than wheels, though, so that would be tricky.
But I get it.
How is that even possible?
Yeah, there's four wheels.
Well, wheels are not our specialty.
We make the decks, and so people buy other types of wheels.
You have to borrow the wheels?
But you do make some wheels.
Some.
Do you make bearings?
I remember always having to replace my bearings.
I remember always having to replace my bearings.
Yeah, we basically make sort of mid-tier bearings and wheels and trucks for complete skateboards.
But if you want to go higher end, you would get more component stuff.
And, you know, we can have all that, all those available in, in app purchases. Yeah. No. Well, I mean, the thing is,
the way I see these games layout where you're going to buy a board or you're
going to buy wheels, it's like, as if they're already made,
we don't go into the factory at all. We don't select different alloys,
polymers or anything. Let's, you know,
let's actually make this a game that teaches people, Oh,
that's how a wheel starts.
Okay.
Just back it up.
Yeah.
Oh, they're unionizing.
The workforce is unionizing.
You got to deal with that.
Okay, let's move this production overseas.
What do we do?
Poison the water cooler.
Yeah.
And what is the soundtrack to that?
What's the,
what's the soundtrack to poisoning the water cooler and eliminating breaks?
Can you hear that?
Yeah,
but you have to sing to Brett.
Poisoning the water Poisoning the water
Pick out a new ball bearing
Do I move to a factory in China?
Do I move to a factory in America?
Do I select new game
that's good yeah unfortunately by by poisoning the water cooler and eliminating breaks
we have made it so that nobody is using the water. Nobody's drinking the water. Oh, I see.
I was getting a Judas Priest,
freaking law kind of vibe from that.
Oh, hell yeah.
No, he's saying you copied them, Brett.
It's not a compliment.
He's saying that you pretended to do something.
I liked it.
I mean, Tony's got a keyboard behind him.
Did you want to get in there with Brett and start jamming?
It's broken.
Sounds even better that way.
Brett could probably fix it remotely.
Brett, just eyeball it in the background there and tell him.
What's missing?
Yeah, get in there, Brett.
You just got to bash the keys a little bit.
There is actually actually two keys that are
sticking up and they are
irreparable
we should put Judas Priest
painkiller in the game
okay oh yeah I think that's the
underrated Judas Priest song
okay you're
saying that the song that Tony mentioned
was is overrated and played
out well definitely for them yes absolutely I would be surprised that the song that Tony mentioned is overrated and played out?
Well,
definitely for them, yes.
Absolutely.
I would be surprised if it hadn't been used yet in one of the games.
What do we think about
the song that Adam Driver
sings at the end of Marriage Story?
Oh, being alive?
Yeah, being alive.
That's really interesting because so much
of, yeah, so much
of our life, especially when we're
young and not really appreciating
what we have, that our
bodies are beautiful and
supple and that our
minds are razor sharp
and we're stressed out about classes and all
these other things. We don't appreciate that we don't have any real responsibilities yet.
And I think being alive has this message of like, wait, let's stop down and kind of appreciate some
of this stuff. And it's about relationships, obviously, too, and finding someone to share
your life with
which i think around the time of college you better be looking at that or you are going to
end up out in the cold did you see that tony i did not mary story did only only nominations
uh yeah exactly what were you watching instead baby driver Once it reaches three, I don't watch them in protest. There you go.
I see.
Sick.
That's metal.
Three nominations.
There you go. I'm counterculture. What can I say?
Shit. That's metal as fuck.
Tony,
we do want to try to
tie in our episodes a little bit into the current news situation.
Do you have any skateboard tricks that you would recommend for people who are in quarantine and can't leave their house?
Is there a safe skateboard trick that you've invented that people can do just sort of on their couch or when they're
putting on their gloves to get their mail or anything like that?
I feel like if you use your couch as a ledge, it's very springy and it kind of gives you
new options.
Right.
So you can like half grind it and then kind of bounce off the couch.
Yeah.
Or just or like all into it and literally bounce off of it. Yeah. Or just, or like Ollie into it and,
and literally bounce off of it.
So that's the thing about sort of what I said,
all these other,
well,
you don't have to grind.
I'm talking about just going stationary.
Oh yeah.
No,
of course.
Yeah,
no,
you could go stationary and just Ollie into it,
but it's just like your,
yeah,
I said bounce off it.
And then you were like,
literally bounce off of it.
And it was as if your idea was like,
so new, but it's fine.
It's cool.
This is your thing.
The skateboarding is your thing.
My thing is education.
It's a collective idea.
We're all part of the same team here.
Yeah.
Yeah.
That's what, that's why I want to make sure we're careful about the way we collaborate
where if you're saying something that someone maybe just said in their previous idea yeah it's
just at the end of the day i'm gonna get more money for it so i need it to be more of my idea
okay is that cool yeah that's obviously not what motivates me you can see i live in a pretty
humble office you have your big office with your broken keyboard so that's and that's kind of like
an allegory for the whole thing isn't it the big nice office and yet the keyboard the soul of the
office is broken it just keeps me grounded did you break it skateboarding yeah we're going crazy
in here i'm trying to skate the keyboard that's how desperate it is that's quarantine the springy
couch idea could be really interesting if one thing about some of the other games which whose
idea with the springy couch mine or tony's no matter whose it was the other games something
that is boring and frankly kind of stupid about them is you're never like getting on a secret spring like a springy thing that's like boing and it's
like bouncing you into a secret world into like uh being able to quarantine yeah exactly being
like and that's making people safe like okay you hit the secret spring and now you're in your house
yeah sucked into a tube
into your house where it's safe to be you're not going to the grocery store bragging about it you're
not doing unnecessary travel you're not going just going to the customs desk at the airport
just to be like you guys don't look familiar we're not doing that we're not doing that and the game
no i say that yeah yeah you look familiar you're here every day
yes we recognize you
yeah gonna buy a flight today tony or just window shopping again i just want to get through customs and see what happens that'll be so nice when this is all over and you get to go to customs
again yeah i want that for you that's what i'm looking forward to the most just so i can just
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Mamia!
Life can be ridiculous, but you know what's not funny?
Getting ripped off.
And Harry's agrees.
So what we want to talk about today with...
Sorry, you said Harry's or Harry?
I said Harry's.
We always talk about Harry's first,
and then we talk about you, clean Harry,
who are sort of our new... Not I don't know, for this campaign.
Talk about Harry's first.
What we want to talk about is something funny that happened to you recently.
A ridiculous or fun situation that you were in recently.
That's the prompt, and that'll take us into discussing the product
particularly the product funny to me or funny to just anyone i i mean do you you feel like there's
a difference there like you yeah i mean i've had things happen to me that i suppose you would find
funny okay but that you didn't find funny and and you have not really and you have things that have
happened that you would find funny but the rest of the world would not yeah i guess i'm interested
in that one that i would find funny yes but that others would not find funny you seem to think that
you have like a specific taste when it comes to what's funny or ridiculous that is not
i ordered uh um like a scented spray for my pillow to help me sleep at night
like a lavender scent okay and uh they accidentally sent me two
okay so you understand that most people would not buy that funny or ridiculous
but but you but you do i just had a little chuckle about the mix up at the at the shipping uh
warehouse harry saw customers getting screwed over by questionable overpriced shaving products.
Clean Harry on the come up.
And decided to do something better.
Instead of charging the same stupid high prices, Harry's found their own way to make beautifully designed razors for a fraction of the price of other big brands.
Bogo, baby.
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Is there a bogo as part of this?
Because I don't want to be talking about deals that aren't.
No, but I clean Harry Punk.
Actually got two bottles.
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Don't like your shave.
No worries.
It's on them.
Getting ripped off isn't funny.
Do you want to hear what happened to me that you might find yes yes sure
but that you didn't yeah so you're attuned to this stuff i got my foot stuck in the dryer at
the laundromat and it somehow turned on and you know that that was something other people would
find funny based on well the responses you were getting.
A lot of people inside that laundromat
seemed to find it pretty humorous
when my legs started spinning around
and flipping me over.
What happened was I was holding my laundry basket
with both hands and I saw,
ooh, still a sock left in the dryer.
So I stuck my foot in
and tried to pick it up with my little toesies.
I wear sandals.
Punk.
And as I'm picking it up, I just sort of tripped,
and my foot got wedged in between.
There's like slats in there and stuck inside there.
And then I don't know who, somebody pushed the button or what,
but it turned on, and the thing starts starts flipping over and I'm flying in circles.
Help, punk.
Help me, you punks.
Are your clothes staying in the basket or are you going fast?
No, no, no.
I'm wearing all of them by the end of the cycle.
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for a $3 trial set hollywood handbook okay we do final exam or we do do we write a thesis
oh yeah we have to do a thesis yes if you want to graduate with otters you have to do a thesis
you have to write the entire thesis and i want to make clear
that the mechanism for typing is not like a keyboard it's the one where it's like okay like
flashing letter a and then you flip through all the possible letters and you select like a flip
phone yes you select that one and then you go from there this is this is how we used to have to do it
when we were in college you used to have to do it when we were in college.
You used to have to, people now have this whole keyboard to type on, but it used to be that you had to flip through every single letter one by one.
And that actually taught you to be careful about what you were saying.
For sure.
So Brett, do you have a soundtrack to us writing the thesis?
It doesn't have to be being alive from Marriage Story.
It could be really any show tune.
What kind of feel do you want for this one?
The final boss, right?
Yes, it is.
It is the final boss.
Before you get into the job market.
It's like a scary boss.
That's not scary to me.
I'm actually feeling even braver hearing that.
I'm laughing at how not scary that is.
Is that scary?
76 trauma bones. 76 trombones.
And we gotta go.
Yeah.
That's more the vibe we were looking for.
Terrifying.
Let the big parade.
Yeah, that's pretty sweet.
This is giving me the feeling of a parade.
There's trombones.
I'm typing.
It's taking a long time, but I'm getting my message across.
I'm supporting my thesis.
I'm citing all of my references.
And I'm actually attaining skills that are going to be very useful in the new job market that I'm entering.
Now, do we want to do an unpaid internship? Tony? I guess that would be the only free to play element of the whole thing.
Right. And obviously, it's a lot of work and you have to your parents have to be able to support
you during that process so that's what the the game asks it's like they make sure that your
parents are wealthy enough to pay your rent and your like kevin actually when he first started at
that earwolf is that right kevin i had other jobs
working for your your parents my dad Is that right, Kevin? I had other jobs. Working for your parents.
My dad.
Is that right?
Sending your parents an email every day.
A check-in.
Well, that's what happens if you select Kevin as a character.
You go straight to the final boss.
You can kind of skip all of the hard stuff.
Yeah.
Who else is in this game
yeah who else should we encounter who are the new who are the new skaters that we should know about
who are the new um oh there are many uh i mean the number one pick right now for the olympics
was going to be naja houston but they just postponed the olympics
so um but definitely him he did not go to college though none i can't say many of them did
yeah yeah yeah it's true yeah yeah i saw him in a college talk about that kevin okay um I was at watching a skate competition
and he won and it was at USC.
So I was like, wow,
look at this. Here we all
are. You were watching it and it
was elsewhere or it was at USC?
It was at USC. It was the skate
league. Oh, okay.
Kevin, your story's falling apart.
Tony has identified
some inconsistencies.
Tony's a goddamn
fucking bloodhound, man,
and he's going to get
to the truth.
Now, you've been
talking out of both sides
of your neck all day.
Now, was it at USC
or were you at USC?
And what was going on there?
It was at USC
and I went there to watch it.
And he was there too?
And he competed and won.
That's the opposite of what you said the first time.
Yeah, as he has many of them, yes.
I think some of the new characters,
because we do have this college element,
should be professors.
We should have H Block and R Block there
to help you do your taxes at the end of every skating season.
I think you should be encountering
a lot of the sort of real life people that
you need to help you, Tony. Sure.
Could we get maybe like, um,
if we achieve our dream of becoming professional skateboarder,
could we get a series of cut scenes talking to like our business manager?
Yeah, absolutely. Yeah. Yes yeah yes yeah and you could portray
them sure yeah so okay so i just won a big competition at usc even chef kevin was there
to see me and i'm in talking to my business manager and i'm just saying like hey uh you know
i appreciate everything you do for me but it's really not been very transparent. I don't know where a lot of my money goes, and then you're taking a percentage of it. I love that I don't have to do some of this paperwork on my own, but are you hiding something from me?
tax bracket that's basically takes 70% of your income. So, um, you know, and I take a very small cut of that just to keep things in order. Um, and so you're going to have to work twice as hard
in order to, uh, maintain your lifestyle. That's lesson number one.
Okay, great. Yeah. That's a great inspirational message. It's like,
you just got to work twice as hard because let's face it you're unfairly overtaxed and taxation is theft is that correct i hey i
don't make i don't make the rules i'm just i'm just the accountant i'm just trying to help you
manage your resources okay this game is really good and what i think i like about it the best is
this was kind of like a little secret trick that we did,
is that Tony, you have now gone to college.
So the next time someone asks you, did you go to college?
You don't have to get that hang dog look on your face.
You proudly puff up your chest and you go,
yeah, Hayes and Sean took me to college.
Yeah.
And we had a lot of fun doing it.
Tony's big family
Zoom boogie edition college.
Manja edition.
Manja mode.
Well, I appreciate it, you guys.
No, I appreciate it.
Is there anything else?
I mean, at this point,
it's just really someone's got to do the coding
and the programming of this.
The graphics, the rendering.
Yeah.
I think it should be like a text adventure.
Well, you should have said that at the beginning, Brett.
Brett, it's too late.
We've already come up with some cool images.
There's already graphics.
The instant family checking in next to you. We can't do that you kissing your parents goodbye at their station wagon
we can't do that it's already being rendered yeah we're already drawing that so maybe do that at the
beginning next time okay tony well something we like to say to our guests when they're here is
that i do love you and i am in love with you. You don't have to say it back.
Obviously, if you're not comfortable, there's no need.
We did just meet.
But it's something that we say and I always like to say it,
especially when I'm feeling a lot of warmth and reciprocity from the guests.
So I'm just putting that out there for you.
And then if you have any parting words
and it doesn't have to be that
but it could be
well I love talking to you guys
okay and I actually am totally comfortable
saying as well that I love you
and I am in love with you
so to me
just listening to the two different things
it sounds a little bit different
than what you said
and again there's no pressure for you to say anything in particular it's what anyone's comfortable with To me, just listening to the two different things, it sounds a little bit different than what you said.
And again, there's no pressure for you to say anything in particular.
It's what anyone's comfortable with is what we want them to do.
Maybe I should have seen Marriage Story then.
No, that actually could have communicated a message to you that you might have internalized that could be useful to you right now. And if you want to take a second to think about your closing thoughts, Brett and Kevin maybe you have something you'd like to say to Tony yeah I'm playing this really nice music and it's
just to me it's super comfortable and it feels natural to say I love you and I'm in love with
you and um really that's all I've wanted to say this whole time thank you hi Tony Chef Kevin here wow um I actually was watching some tutorial videos of you
uh and I used it to learn how to skateboard and then I got uh bullied by some kids this week because they said I
have room for improvement.
Thanks, Lola.
And I just want to say I love you and I'm in love
with you.
Thank you. Thank you, guys.
Well, I guess
based on peer
pressure, I do love you and I'm
in love with you as well.
Oh my god, Tony! Wow, and I'm in love with you as well. Oh my god, Tony!
Wow, Tony Hawk is
in love with me.
That feels great.
That's so nice. Thank you for doing the
show and thank you for sharing
those feelings that you have for us.
That's really, really nice.
The game's going to be a smash
hit.
Keep doing everything you've been doing
Good luck with the boogie roller
And all
And Manja your family
And the grocery store
And if you need anything
Literally anything at all
Do not hesitate to ask
Alright well
As soon as you guys get back to me
With an alpha build of this game
I can give you feedback
I have an alpha build of this game, I can give you feedback.
I have an alpha build.
Yeah.
Brett has one.
Brett, send that over.
I was born with an alpha build.
I can send it over.
He's sending it.
He's sending me right now.
All right.
God bless everybody.
God bless you.
Bye.
Hollywood Handbook.
That was a HeadGum Podcast.