How Did This Get Made? - Last Looks: Beautiful Wedding (w/ Greg Fitzsimmons)
Episode Date: August 30, 2024Comedian Greg Fitzsimmons chats with Jason & Paul, and even an earthquake can't stop them from talking about their comedy influences, the weirdness of guys' nights, and Greg's new standup special "You... Know Me." But first, Paul dives into corrections and omissions from Beautiful Wedding, shares a bonus deleted scene from the live show, and announces next week's movie. Check out Greg's new standup special "You Know Me" on YouTube: www.youtube.com/watch?v=yvUqkWh_x4U Troll 2 VIRTUAL live show on Sept 6th (pay what you can tickets) + we'll be in NYC on Nov 15th! Go to hdtgm.com for ticket info, merch, and for more on bad movies.Order Paul’s book about his childhood: Joyful Recollections of TraumaFor extra content on Matinee Monday movies, visit Paul's YouTube page: youtube.com/paulscheerTalk bad movies on the HDTGM Discord: discord.gg/hdtgmPaul’s Discord: discord.gg/paulscheerFollow Paul’s movie recs on Letterboxd: letterboxd.com/paulscheer/Check out new HDTGM movie merch over at teepublic.com/stores/hdtgmPaul and Rob Huebel stream live on Twitch every Thursday 8-10pm EST: www.twitch.tv/friendzoneLike good movies too? Subscribe to Unspooled with Paul and Amy Nicholson: listen.earwolf.com/unspooledSubscribe to The Deep Dive with Jessica St. Clair and June Diane Raphael: www.thedeepdiveacademy.com/podcastCheck out The Jane Club over at www.janeclub.comWant a free 3-month trial of the SiriusXM app? Go to: siriusxm.com/hdtgmWhere to find Paul, June, & Jason:@PaulScheer on Instagram & Twitter@Junediane on IG and @MsJuneDiane on TwitterJason is not on social media
Transcript
Discussion (0)
Eggs, Greggs, and how did this get made?
That's right, today we are breaking it all down on last looks.
Hit the theme!
How did this get made?
Trash can fires and Jacob's ladder
Starting out bad, now it's getting battered
Jason Stiff full, Angelino
Down at the lago is where I seen it
How did this get there?
Tall John's here and Jesus is
Falcon E. Ross is about to puke
Julian has once his mission
And where the bunch stops is another question.
How did this get made?
How did this get made?
How did this get made?
Hello all you pull pluggers of Shep's Grandma. I'm Paul Scheer and welcome to
How Did This Get Made? Last Looks, where you the listener get to voice your issues
on Beautiful Wedding, a movie that discord user Ashwin Goes to College
thinks should have had the tagline, it's a nice day for a shite wedding. Good tagline. Even better performance from me. Thank you Ashwin Goes
to College for that tagline. Remember, if you have an alt movie tagline, submit it to
us on our discord and we might just read it on the show. That's right. Coming up on today's
episode, you know we have corrections omissions. We're gonna get into Beautiful Wedding.
We're gonna get into all your issues,
but we also will have an exclusive deleted scene
from our Beautiful Wedding live show.
Then one of the greatest comedians of our time,
that's right, Greg Fitzsimmons stops by
for a chat with me and Jason.
And lastly, as always,
I will reveal the movie for next week's episode.
But before we get to that, have you gotten your tickets for our live
virtual show on September 6th, it's pay what you can afford.
How did this get made is joining forces with move on to raise some money.
Unfortunately, the show is only available in the United States for one day.
It will be released as a podcast,
but when you sign up to watch the show you'll be helping save democracy. How
about that? Anyway, the show is on September 6 at 5 p.m. Pacific 8 p.m.
Eastern. We have Adam Scott joining us to break down Troll 2. So head to HDTGM
for all the ticket information and if you can't watch the virtual show, don't worry.
It will be available as a podcast right after we do it or, you know,
conservatively within the area in which we do it, we're not going to be breaking release schedules here.
Anyway, I believe that New York's show on November 15th is sold out. But if you live on the Eastern seaboard,
get ready because Jason and I are coming
to do some dinosaur live shows in Brooklyn.
We'll also be in DC and Boston.
Stay tuned for those dates,
but they're all after the How Did This Get Made?
show in New York on November 15th.
So we cannot wait.
We also have some live Largo shows coming up. That's right, in October, after the How Did This Get Made show in New York on November 15th. So we cannot
wait. We also have some live Largo shows coming up. That's right in October and in
November. So keep your eyes peeled. We got a lot of stuff happening. My book, Joyful
Recollections of Trauma. I have to say I am blown away. I just looked at some
numbers this week. You are listening to the book. You are buying the book still weeks and weeks, months out.
I appreciate it so much.
And I appreciate all the amazing reviews
that I'm seeing on Amazon and Goodreads and Storygraph.
I really, really appreciate it.
So thank you so much.
Keep on buying the book, tell your friends about it.
That's the best way that I can combat people
like Tom fucking Selleck. Oh man, I go into a Barnes and Noble and there are rows and rows of Tom Selick
books, but only a handful of mine. But you know what? They're selling. So much so that
I went to Hawaii, I signed some books and they're already sold out there. So if you
want a personalized copy from me, you can head over to Chevalier's. It's a bookstore
in Los Angeles and you can tell them what you want me to put in your book and I'll put it in there. That's right.
Anyway, that is all the plugs that I got, but let's get into it because last week we
talked at length about Beautiful Wedding. We had questions. We might have even missed
a few things. Here's your chance to set a straight fact check us if you will it is now time for corrections and
Omissions
Tell us something that we don't know maybe something they said wrong in the show
Corrections and omissions
Corrections and omissions. Corrections and omissions.
Thank you Wally Tarkington for that theme song.
By the way, that sounds like Wally Tarkington.
I love the name, but it does sound like a character
that Rodney Dangerfield might play
in a classic 80s comedy.
Let's start with Mitch Cappa.
They didn't mention the big reveal
that the beautiful series of movies
takes place in an alternate universe.
Earth 6969, well, I like what you did there.
Where the Sacramento Kings won the NBA finals.
It made me wonder if Paul will give the Clippers
a championship when he makes
his movie. Well, here's what I want to tell you. I did notice that. I believe we talked about it,
we might have cut it out because it really stuck out to me. But then I also knew that Jason
and June may not really give a shit if I brought that up. So, so I can't remember. It's definitely
something I wrote down when watching it. I would never give the Clippers a fake championship.
They don't need it.
They don't need it.
I'm a fan.
I don't need to create a fake narrative
to make myself feel better.
Dr. Guts, 10.03, by the way, I wouldn't feel better.
I wouldn't feel better to give them a fake championship.
No way, let's earn it.
Dr. Guts, 10.03 writes, it seemed odd, and that's why I don't bring up sports on the
show.
Dr. Gutt's 10.03 writes, it seemed odd that the central conflict around the film is that
Abby and Travis got married without really knowing anything about each other when the
premise of the first movie is that Abby loses a bet and has to live with Travis for 30 days.
This movie wants to act as if these are two strangers
who accidentally got married while drunk in Vegas,
but they have way more familiarity
with each other than that.
Yes, Dr. Gutz, you are 100% right.
It really jettisoned everything we knew about them.
I thought that the movie didn't know
exactly what it wanted to be.
Surprise, surprise.
But the idea that I think the buyer's remorse, I thought that the movie didn't know exactly what it wanted to be. Surprise, surprise.
But the idea that I think the buyer's remorse,
like we were just, it was just getting interesting
and then we got married.
So now it's serious.
I thought it was maybe going for that,
but they didn't really embrace that.
And that's a tough needle to thread.
Like, oh, just when we were carefree, now we're married.
But they also act like marriage is like the end all be all.
Like they could have gotten that shit annulled, right?
And go, hey, that was a mistake.
That was a drunken mistake.
Let's go back.
That wouldn't have been a big deal.
I don't think that would have been a big deal.
Would be a big deal to you if you and I got married
in a night of drunken passion,
and I'm not married in this scenario,
and neither are you, or if you are,
and we woke up the next morning and we were married,
would we feel like we have to go through with it?
I don't think we would.
I think we'd go, you know what, it doesn't count.
All right, let me know what your thoughts are.
Let's go to the phones, but you can't answer that one
because it's a pre-taped episode.
Here we go.
Go into the phones, talking to Katie from New York.
Hi Paul.
Just wanted to give you guys a quick
little Dylan Sprouse recent story.
So last week, somebody plastered flyers
all over Midtown Manhattan with a picture of Dylan Sprouse and the message,
Dylan Sprouse ruined my life. So here's his number, have fun with a telephone number.
I gave it a call and it was just some guy that said he wouldn't be answering unknown numbers and
he would be blocking people. So I don't know if it was his, I don't know what he did to this person, but, uh,
maybe it was sweet revenge for making this terrible movie.
Anyways, thank you guys.
Bye bye.
Wow.
Katie.
Wait, so he answered the phone to say that he would not be answering unknown numbers?
This doesn't seem like Dylan Sprouse, but this seems like the perfect
way to fuck over someone, like go like, Oh, Olivia Rodrigo fucked over my life.
Here's her number.
Give her a call.
Like it's a great way to mess with somebody.
Cause Dylan Sprouse, I would imagine, uh, that would happen to him and he would
change his number within five to ten minutes
But maybe somebody in your own life doesn't know how to do that that quick and you could really
Terrorize them with that so team get on it and by team. I mean all of you listeners figure that out
We need to figure out what is Dylan Sprouse up to or if he's just some dude who's
Answering the phone telling people that he won't be answering the phone again
We need to find out what's going on call that number again. I guess now maybe you're blocked. I don't know
I am so confused. I need answers. All right. Oh
Boy, let's go to the next call. Hey Paul or
Jason depending on who's doing the mini episode this week
Don't know if it's a Spotify thing or what, or if you guys got a new sponsor, but lately
while I'm listening to your episodes, I've been hearing ads for Eglin's best eggs.
And I'm just curious what Jason's reaction might be to knowing that your podcast is getting
ads for something that might kill him.
So just love to hear what he has to say about that one.
Love the show, keep doing what you're doing.
Thanks, bye.
Eric from Colorado, first of all, Jason, hello Paul,
or Jason's done two last looks episodes, two.
You're, oh, I don't know who I'm gonna get here.
And secondly, you know what?
Eggs might kill Jason, but they keep this podcast free.
We've said that we won't do certain ads,
we will do ads for eggs.
And Jason, and this is the sad part about it,
when they bought those ads,
they make Jason listen to the ads.
So unfortunately, that's what he does for this podcast.
So you're welcome. But unfortunately, that's what he does for this podcast. So you're welcome.
But yes, we advertise eggs so this can remain a free podcast. Back to the discord. Johnny
Unusual writes, at one point, Abby reads an online news article about a bride who murdered
her husband on their honeymoon. On the side of the page is another headline that says mysterious
ancient city discovered beneath Antarctic ice.
Now this seems to imply the movie seems to take place
in the same world as Lovecraft's sci-fi horror story
at the mountains of madness about the very idea.
Interesting to see something tying together
Jamie Maguire and H.P. Lovecraft besides being racist.
Wow, a lot to unpack here.
Here's the thing.
That was probably done by an amazing set deck person,
graphic designer on set who just was having some fun
with this film.
And whenever you see a paper in a movie,
not in a Nolan movie, but like a regular
movie, look at those, look at what's going on there.
There's a lot of stuff going on.
Primarily it's photos of whoever designed the papers family with stories about them.
But, uh, but that was pretty great.
I actually thought they were just going for more of an, uh, you know, an
Atlantis kind of an idea and it didn't tie to anything in particular,
but the fact that they're connecting some high art
and low art.
I mean, this is the, what is it?
The New Yorker approval matrix right here.
Erin Renee writes,
I know you talked about how they couldn't find condoms
in Mexico that first night,
but my question is, did they ever?
Because either they were readily available
the next morning or they never found condoms.
And that means that they've either never had sex
the entire time they were in Mexico
or they just kept on playing just the tip with Pino.
And that laid the groundwork for Beautiful Baby,
the third and final installment of the trilogy,
Aaron Renee, if we get Beautiful Baby,
I will be so fucking psyched.
As a matter of fact,
I don't even know if you're joking,
is the third Beautiful Baby?
I don't think it is.
And now I'm excited for it.
Can you write it, Aaron Renee?
I think if you write it, they will shoot it.
All right, so many great corrections
and omissions this week.
There can only be one winner. And when I say winner, I really mean that in the grand scheme of life where
winning is about pride and not about objects.
You know, I'm not going to celebrate somebody who is, uh, hoping that I create
a fictionalized clipper win.
I'm not going to give it to the person who, uh, thought that Jason might be
answering the phones when he's only done it twice, I'm going to give it to the person who thought that Jason might be answering the phones when he's only done it twice.
I'm gonna give it to Aaron Renee.
And you may be saying, well, Paul,
why are you giving it to Aaron Renee?
Because isn't Johnny Unusual the one
that really brought an interesting thing to the table?
Yeah, maybe you're right.
Maybe I forgot about Johnny Unusual.
And maybe Aaron Renee was just there when I said,
I'm gonna pick a winner and that's what I picked.
Either way, I made my decision.
Aaron Renee, you are the winner
and here is your winning theme from Francis Day.
You win nothing.
Nothing.
Wow, that was a little darker than normal.
Thank you, Francis for that song. Remember, if was a little darker than normal. Thank you, Francis, for that song.
Remember, if you wanna submit a theme,
please email us at howdidthiscameatatearwolf.com,
but keep them short.
15 to 20 seconds is best.
And remember, we are looking for second opinion songs
for the live virtual stream.
So get out your shit, make it look good.
We will play them, videos.
We're looking for video songs. So
Get your hair done
Get a backdrop get some good ring lights and surprise us
All right
Coming up after the break comedian Greg Fitzsimmons will stop by to chat with me and Jason and I will announce next week's movie
But first I want to play an exclusive bonus scene from our beautiful wedding live show.
A few of you wrote in mentioning
that this movie had some connections
to the TV show, Friends.
And one of the roosters was named Ross,
and Dylan Sprouse also played Ross's son on Friends.
However, one audience member
had an even more elaborate Friends theory.
So take a listen.
Keith, okay, what's the question?
So my question is,
actually, it's an alternate source for the fan fiction here. So the writer-director, I don't remember his name, Kubel, something? Yes, Roger Kumble. Right, so he worked with Schwimmer back in
the 90s. David. David. So this is really, so this is really the one after Vegas, after Ross and Rachel get married,
and they go on their honeymoon to Mexico,
and this is the fan fiction of what would have happened
had they filmed that.
All right, his theory is that Roger Cumble-
I don't think that theory is true.
Roger Cumble is friends with David Schwimmer,
and because of their friendship,
he was finally able to act out his own fan fiction.
All right, I'm listening.
But I also walk away.
You know how that works, though, Paul.
You can only really write fan fiction
if you're kind of friends with the person who's...
Yeah, that is true. Oh, yeah.
Well, that's like all my Grace and Frankie fan fiction.
Yeah, you're the only one I trust.
It is disgusting.
All right, people, we are back.
And I just want to remind you that every Monday, we are popping out some older episodes into the live feed.
That's right.
And we did a doozy this week. 1987's sci-fi Stephen King hit.
I'm talking about the Schwarzenegger led Running Man.
How did I say it's so weird?
I should have just said the 1987 hit,
The Running Man starring Arnold Schwarzenegger.
I don't know why I said that so weird,
but I'm here and we did it together.
Anyway, check out what we got every Monday.
It's a great chance to go back
and listen to some classic episodes.
And now listen to what we have coming up.
We have a very special guest.
Jason and I love this guy.
He is a hilariously funny comedian.
We've worked together since, my gosh,
the early 2000s on Best Week Ever.
He's got a brand new standup special coming out called,
You Know Me, which is available
on his YouTube channel right now.
The man is Greg Fitzsimmons,
and we got a lot to chat about, not just a special,
so much stuff, and we're gonna give you a bunch of stuff
to check out in our conversation.
So without any further ado, Anton Wellen, play us in.
Paul and Jason have things to say.
And it's a fact that we can all call it just chat.
They're watching their movies.
They're watching people.
They're going to tell me You can't stop me and it just
Shades
Greg, it's awesome to have you here.
Your special, You Know Me is on
the Greg Fitzsimmons YouTube channel.
I'm so excited that you're here.
How are you?
I'm good.
I'm good.
I mean, it's very difficult right now
because I'm promoting myself and I don't know,
I just have such low self-esteem and I'm so Irish
that the idea of saying like, look at me,
pay attention to me is just, it's anathemic,
what's the word?
Anathetical, antithetical.
Antithetical.
Yep. Yep.
Yeah.
Yes, well, I feel like that is a very,
that is very much a comedian's mentality.
It's hard.
It's one thing to get on stage
and scream into a microphone, everybody look at me,
but it's another thing to like go on a podcast
or be out in the world and having to be like,
actually, I would genuinely love it
if you would look at me on my YouTube channel
on this special.
Yes.
And also, I feel like you are so used to talking to people.
You know, you have, what, like three podcasts, right?
You have Fits Dog, Childish, and Sunday Papers, right?
So you're talking to people, like,
it's hard to make that transition on the other side.
I often feel like when I'm on that other side,
I'm trying to do the job of the person hosting the show.
I'm like, I know what I need to get out.
I'm gonna try to make it easier on you
so you don't even have to set me up
for me to tell you about it.
But I think for you doing a standup special,
it's hard because how do you pitch a standup special?
Like you're like, yeah, he's funny.
Watch the show.
Well, it's almost like I almost pine for the days
when you would fly into, you know, Tempe, Arizona.
No, worse, you fly to like Atlanta from LA.
So you get in Thursday night, you're exhausted,
you do a show and now you got to wake up at 6.30 their time,
which is 3.30 LA time.
And then you go to four 20 minute radio interviews.
Just drive time radio.
Drive time scooter and the pooch.
And they've got a lot of,
they got a guy on a sound effects board.
They've all been drinking coffee since four in the morning.
And you walk in.
There's a million inside jokes that you are not a part of
that are flying over you like bullet fire.
I go, okay, right.
And all of the jokes are like local specifics.
And it's like, it could be worse.
You could be on the 203.
And it's like, wait, I don't know.
Is that bad? Speaking of the 203,
we are backed up all the way to exit 47A.
Yeah, we're backed up to the library.
Where's the fucking library?
Greg, you and I last hung out together
on what I thought was a couple's night.
You thought it was a dude's night.
And we went out, we had a great dinner.
It was actually, it turned out to be a great night,
a fun night, but it was such a,
I felt for you in that moment
because Greg and I are friends with this guy.
He's a coach of a professional basketball team.
And we thought, I was under the impression
it was a couple's night and Greg was under the impression
it was a dude's night.
And so I brought my wife, the coach brought his wife
and Greg brought his friend.
My college buddy.
And the worst thing is it's like,
it's just not that frequent that me and my wife
go to a nice dinner with nice people, you know?
No, never.
And she, and at a beautiful restaurant
and he picked up the check, I mean,
and you're there and June is there and I feel,
and she is such a magic person to hang out with
and she just missed everything.
And my dopey buddy from college is sitting there going like,
are we gay?
And you didn't tell me or something?
And your buddy, like your buddy did though come with,
like he has been around, like he did some cool stuff.
It was fun.
It was just a fun hangout.
But I feel like those are those moments that I am constantly living in fear of.
Did I get the time right?
Did I get the thing right?
Are we on the same page?
I feel like I'm always,
if I get to someplace five minutes early,
I'm like, oh, I fucked it up.
I fucked it up horribly.
I shouldn't be here.
It's next week.
I get, I'm checking emails and texts.
Well, it was originally a guys night.
We've been planning this for two years, maybe?
Yeah.
Things change, I don't know, yeah.
Greg, was your wife disappointed when she realized
that she should have gone?
Very. Or was she like,
I dodged a bullet.
No, no, no, no, no.
My wife loves going to dinners like that.
Oh, that's a bummer.
She's like the most social person.
I wouldn't call her outgoing,
but she loves meeting new people.
If she met you, she would ask about you.
And when she saw you 11 years later,
she would remember everything that you told her.
I love that.
I love a good, when you meet someone,
it's a good interview, it's a good conversation,
and it like lands.
It's like a real moment you have.
And especially I will say, in this town,
when you are meeting people out in the world,
it's not often that it is like a very real,
very human connection.
You know, it's not always like that here.
I like a dinner where you have some strangers in the mix.
I feel like back in New York, it was a,
it happened a lot more for me in New York.
And now it's like, oh, I know everybody here,
but it's nice to be like,
oh, I don't really know your wife that well.
So it'd be great to talk to you.
Like, it's like, it's a little,
there's new information coming around.
Like, you can't just keep it as the same old topics
that you'd be talking about all the time.
I like that.
Yeah, and I really, I don't like a guy's night out,
especially if one guy's an NBA coach and you're like,
oh God, is this gonna be some manly thing?
I can't do that.
I don't like men.
I mean, I like, like if I'm with my college buddies,
I can do the man thing because it's kind of being ironic
about it, you know, people call me, that's why I get, I'm called Fitz Dog thing because it's kind of being ironic about it. People call me, that's why I'm called Fitz Dogg
because it was a joke in college
that I hated fraternities so much
that they all went, hey, it's Fitz Dogg.
And it just kind of stuck.
But no, I much prefer some female energy in the room.
God help me if like cigars come out.
I feel like if somebody has cigars, I got to leave.
It's over.
I I'm not supposed to be here.
Yeah.
I can't coexist in the same space as cigars or like, or like if we start to
get into like very intense, like bourbon con conversations or something, I'm
like, I don't know.
I feel very ignorant or very foolish.
I appreciate a nice wine.
I definitely do.
I'm not in that zone where I can tell you that much
about it.
I like what I like.
But when I've seen people like, oh, come to my,
I have a wine locker at a restaurant.
I've been in those situations.
And that's another thing.
Like I go there so much that I keep my wine there.
Like, you know, it's like a gym membership
and that also makes me uncomfortable.
Yeah, when we used to go to Largo,
we used to do Largo way back when on Fairfax.
Yeah, so Laura Keitlinger,
who's one of the most underrated comics of all time.
So funny.
She used to keep a bottle of kettle one behind,
she had her own bottle of kettle one behind the bar.
It was like a special type of it.
I love that.
At my barbershop, there is a secret compartment
that if you bring liquor, you can drink it.
Like you can drink anything.
Like if you bring a bottle,
you can drink anything in the liquor cabinet.
That's the, I've never seen anyone pop it open.
My barbershop, you know, I'm a bald man,
but I still, you know, I get my hair trimmed.
They, they have a lot of events at my barbershop.
They're always like, we're gonna have a poker night.
We're gonna do music.
We're doing a Christmas thing.
They're always inviting me out.
And I, and I'm, I've not yet gone.
I can't get out of the house for anything like that.
And I don't, you know, but it's also like,
I don't know who I'd be bumping into there
because there's no connection.
I'd love it if you invited Greg
to one of your barbershops events
and he brought his wife as if it was a date.
Ah!
Like completely misjudged it again.
Yeah.
Honey, come on, come across town.
Come out of the East side.
We're going to Paul Scheer's barber shop.
Oh my gosh.
What, is this an earthquake?
Whoa.
Did you guys feel a giant earthquake?
Did you feel it?
Whoa.
Oh shit.
Major.
Whoa.
Wow.
It's still going.
Wow.
I am not feeling it where I am.
I'm still feeling it.
Yeah, mine just finished out.
Whoa.
Keep it in.
Keep it in the episode. Keep it. Yeah, mine just finished out, whoa. Keep it in, keep it in the episode.
That keep it, whoa, holy shit.
That was the worst one I felt.
That's the strongest I've felt in a long time.
And didn't we have one, we had one last week
or the week prior, was that it?
Yeah, a little, yeah.
Yeah, wow.
Well, my property values just went down 15%.
My wife just said she almost fell off the treadmill.
She was on the treadmill.
Holy cow.
Wow.
Oh my Lord.
Well, the recovering from,
so Jason, you have still not felt it.
I haven't felt it.
Where do you live?
I live in the hills.
So my guess is I'm some,
I get my guess is it just doesn't,
I don't know.
Like I don't, I didn't feel it.
No, the big earthquake back in,
what was it, 88 or something?
Yeah.
That one, they said people in Hollywood and the West side,
like it was, everything was disrupted, it was chaotic.
People who lived in the hills woke up the next morning
and started getting ready to go to work.
Oh yeah.
They didn't feel anything, because it's all granite.
Yeah, yeah.
Like I'm on like bedrock, I think.
And maybe that makes it not.
I feel like that would conduct it more,
but I don't, every time someone's like,
oh, did you feel the earthquake?
I'm always like, I did not.
So that-
Meanwhile, Venice is a liquefaction zone,
which means it's basically built on sand
and you may just sink in.
Wow, just a total sinkhole.
Wouldn't that be wild?
Jesus Christ.
Let's talk about your special.
Now who directed your special?
Do you pick a director?
Or do you do it yourself?
What's your process now?
Because you've done these a bunch.
And specials themselves have changed so much
from back in the day to now.
Like you're, you know, I'm assuming you're doing this.
You're putting this out on your own on YouTube,
right Greg?
Yeah, I had it produced by 800 pound gorilla,
which they do most of the big podcasts.
And so they flew everybody into all,
I did it at the mothership in Austin.
Cool.
And so they flew everybody in, it was expensive
and I laid out the money because I wanted to maybe put it
on Netflix and so they have certain specs
that it has to be.
I've directed other people's specials,
so I just directed it myself.
I mean, the DP has a lot to do with it.
You know, it's basically, you know, directing a special
is just setting up the camera angles basically.
And you also know your stuff. I mean, it's like, that a special is just setting up the camera angles basically. And so-
And you also know your stuff.
I mean, it's like, that's the other thing too.
It's like, I feel like, before you go,
are you taping like two or three specials
or are you taping one or two?
Just two and one night.
Two and one night, got it.
And so they came in, we had like seven cameras
and a whole lighting kit.
And then the first show I come out
and they told everybody to please get seated for the show
because they had the opener and the feature go on.
And then we took a break so that everybody could get a drink,
take a piss, they wouldn't have to get up.
And so they go, all right.
And I'm so goddamn nervous.
I was gonna say like, at this point,
like how much are you like, okay, it's these two shows.
I gotta just do these two shows, right?
Yeah, because I'm at the point in my career,
I've been doing it for 35 years.
And you get to a certain point
where they start introducing you on the local shows as,
this guy's a legend, don't call me a legend.
That is the most insulting, like, what am I,
an antique or something? Don't call me a legend. That is the most insulting, like, what am I,
an antique or something?
And so like, I wanna do a special,
and I think I did a special that shows that I'm doing it
at the level I've been doing it this whole time.
And so I'm so nervous that I'm pacing, I can't breathe,
I'm drinking bottles of water.
And then they introduced me and I walk out on stage
and I do my first joke.
And then a tall guy walks into the room
in front of all the cameras and sits down.
And I just went, well, let's start it again.
And I left the stage, played the theme music.
Welcome to the stage, Greg Fitzsimmons.
And I walk up and I do the same joke
and it gets half the laughter.
And then I do two more jokes
and then two more people walk into the front row.
So I said, all right, we got to start it again.
And so I walk on, I go, listen, this time you guys,
do me a favor, pretend you haven't heard these jokes before.
That's brutal.
Yeah, so I ended up, I showed the special to David Tell
and he goes, dude, you gotta cut the first three minutes.
Yeah.
Cause they were so flat.
And I did, I started the special like four or five minutes in.
Well, oh, so you just cut into later jokes.
Yeah, I cut it so it looks like it was the first joke, but, uh...
I loved, and I'll say that I loved Attelle's recent special.
And one of the things that I loved about it, frankly,
was that it was like, I don't know, 45 minutes long?
It was 40 minutes long or something?
40 minutes long.
It was like a sprint. It was like a Dave Attelle sprint,
which was so fun and so fucking funny that I was like, oh, I'm not like here missing.
Oh, why isn't it 60?
Why isn't it an hour?
Why is it?
I'm like, this was phenomenal.
I love it.
And you know, it wasn't 40.
It was supposed to.
I know, it was, he said, yeah.
Netflix said, if it's not 40 minutes, you don't get paid.
And his was 37 minutes.
And so he went out, he taped it in San Francisco.
So he goes down to the wharf where all the sea lions are. And he just starts playing
his plastic flute with shots of the sea lions for three minutes.
It's so funny at the end of the special, there is just him padding for time. Literally padding
the special for time. It's so funny.
It's such a great special.
But anyway, sorry.
What a great person to run it by
and also somebody who would, I'm certain,
give you a no bullshit answer.
Cut that first few bits.
Get it out, get it out.
That's a hard thing to tell someone.
There are hard things that happen.
I remember I was hosting this thing for the crews,
right, during the strikes,
and we were raising money for crews,
and we did this big benefit downtown
at the Orpheum Theater, and I was coming out,
and I was MCing the night, and I came out on stage,
and I had my jokes on a teleprompter,
and I get introduced, and literally,
a group of people block the teleprompter.
Like mid-joke, right? get introduced and literally a group of people block the teleprompter, like, like
mid joke, right.
And it's like, and, and it is like, it's the most unnerving thing because you're
like, we didn't account for this.
And then, and I was already like, it's like, you're already mid something.
So you can't even like wait for them to ebb and flow.
It is like it, it like dealing with an audience in any of these
things is such a, uh, it's such a tricky, it's like, it is a tricky proposition because you want to
capture, wants to feel real and alive, but you also know that you really only have one shot to get
the genuine reaction. It's, it's a very, it's so bizarre. It's such a bizarre thing. Well, that's why one of my favorite specials of all time
is Dice, The Night the Laughter Died,
where he literally walked into danger fields at midnight
on like a Wednesday.
And there was about 15 people left.
They'd just seen three hours of comedy.
And he just walked up unannounced and did an hour
and they hated him and they were talking
and they were heckling.
And he was just, but it was an exercise in watching a guy
who with what we all wanna be,
which is just impervious to how they're feeling about you.
And just having a voice that's so strong
that he just went right through it.
It was amazing. I remember having that tape and not getting it, but being so strong that he just went right through it. It was amazing.
I remember having that tape and not getting it,
but being like impressed that he was,
I was like, whoa, this isn't bizarre.
Like, yeah, it was really, that's like a very interesting,
I really listened to it a couple of years ago.
I was like, this is,
no one else has really done anything like that,
it feels like.
It's also like so interesting to listen to specials
that are not as polished.
Like the comedy special now has become
such a slick kind of polished thing.
And I feel like it's really fun to watch specials,
you know, cause specials weren't like that in,
when I grew up getting someone's comedy special on tape,
it was just a recorded set at a club and it was,
you know, maybe a little bit polished, but it wasn't,
you know, it was for an album or something like that.
It wasn't as built up.
And now you're like Kyle Canane's last special
was a club special.
Like I feel like what you're describing
sounds a little bit more like a night at the club,
which I feel like that's really interesting to me.
Like that's like, I wanna hear you engaging.
I wanna hear, I enjoy that, those moments
of like genuine discovery in the moment, you know?
Yeah, I talked to a guy in the front row
about maybe two minutes into the set, there was a guy
and it wasn't, I wasn't looking to do it,
but it just kind of happened.
And I was like, I did it a few times and I kept it in
because you get so sick of telling the same jokes
over and over again, if you can break it up.
What were the specials, Jason,
when you were growing up that struck you
and influenced you and you remember?
The big ones for me were the first,
cause I grew up in like suburban Boston.
So- What town?
Nahant, Massachusetts.
Oh, sure.
So just north of Boston.
So like the Boston comedy scene,
so like Steven Wright's first album was huge to me.
Like that was a bomb in my life, you know,
like was that record.
And then everything else, it was the Eddie Murphy,
but those were big clubs, those were big theater shows.
The Eddie Murphy specials, you know,
Delirious and everything that came out.
Raw. Raw, incredible. It and everything that came out. Raw.
Raw, incredible.
It was the Bill Cosby tapes also I had, you know,
growing, like, would be the, those are probably the,
I bet the Bill Cosby tapes were the first ones I got
from my parents that were like clean comedy albums to get,
which is hilarious.
My dad let me borrow his Smothers Brothers albums.
So that, or like, or that's when I was visiting his parents' house, they his Smothers Brothers albums. So that or like, or that's when I was visiting
his parents' house, they had Smothers Brothers albums.
So I listened to that and Bill Cosby.
And then the first dirty one I ever heard
was Robin Williams' Reality What A Concept.
It was just like, I remember it's like,
I remember jokes on that, but it felt dirty.
And I remember I loved Robin Williams' Mork, right?
Like I just say, and it was like,
but it felt like a different Robin Williams.
Like, and it was just, and like Eddie Murphy's first special,
the one I had on tape, you could hear glasses clinking.
It wasn't like a stadium show,
like where Delirious is like a stadium.
It was still like, Eddie Murphy's talking
about the Busboys.
He's like, give it up for the,
oh no, actually the opener, I think that they're a band.
But you could hear glasses just moving around.
It was like, those albums were big.
And also Emo Phillips was very big for me.
Oh, Emo and Judy Tanuda.
I had a Judy Tanuda tape as well,
which I felt like featured her getting heckled
and going at someone.
And there was like, there was a back and forth
because it was, it was like a, it was a club show.
You know, Emo just calls me sometimes.
I met him once, like 15 years ago. back and forth, because it was, it was like a, it was a club show. You know, Emo just calls me sometimes.
I met him once, like 15 years ago.
And then once a year, he'll just call me
and he'll be like, what are you doing?
Like no agenda.
Doesn't even have, usually when you call somebody,
you have a bit or you have an idea,
maybe you're going to start the conversation with zero.
Just call and we'll talk for like an hour.
He is the sweetest man you've ever met in your life.
I just saw him open for Weird Al on his,
like Weird Al did an acoustic tour and he was great.
What a great duo.
It was so fun.
Yeah, he was really, really funny.
And it was, I don't know, I just, like, I remember seeing him.
I was so excited to see him at Caroline's
when I was in New York City.
I was like, oh my gosh, you know, like those like classic
things, I just remember these albums.
But I remember like as a kid, also those HBO specials
were huge, like it was like, it was like Jackie Mason
presents, you know, or something like that.
It was like, or maybe it was Rodney, yeah, yeah.
So it was like, you just get like four different comics.
Yeah.
Yeah, they, those were powerful sets, you know?
And, but the album that struck me most,
and I think whenever people say,
"'Who Affects You the Most?'
it was Bob Newhart, the button down mind of Bob Newhart.
Oh, wow.
Which is the craziest story because that album,
he used to be funny at cocktail parties.
He worked in advertising.
And the crazy thing about like the night,
was that probably the early 60s that album came out?
So he would just crack people up.
And there was a guy who used to go to the parties,
who was an executive at Atlantic Records,
one of the big record companies,
they just started a comedy division.
And the guy said, you know, Bob, you're really funny.
He goes, would you wanna do a comedy album?
And Bob was like, I never thought about it,
but yeah, that'd be fun.
And so he goes, okay, now when's your next standup date?
And Bob goes, well, I've never done one.
So the guy says, I don't care, let's set you up.
So they booked him in Vegas,
three shows or four shows over the weekend.
The first couple of shows,
he learned how to do standup in a club.
And then the second two he recorded,
which went on to be a gold record and won the Grammy that year.
Holy shit, I never realized that.
Wow. Yeah.
Isn't that amazing that it's just that effortless for him?
Yeah.
I mean, truly one of the most effortless performers to watch, just like really just,
well, I mean, I saw him do like a fundraiser bid,
I'm gonna say five years, six years ago,
as a man in his eighties and he crushed, he crushed.
It felt so easy.
But the other thing about that material is
it's not traditional standup.
It's the phone calls.
So they're all phone calls, right? So if he's doing that, it's not traditional standup. It's right, it's the phone calls. They're all phone calls, right?
So if he's doing that, it's also like,
he kind of invented, like he was writing full,
like it's such a weird thing to launch your career with,
not to even be in comedy.
It's like, wow, and that the audience went with it.
I gotta go back and listen.
Well, I mean, I think the thing that drew me to that
was his ability to bring the crowd to him.
So much of the comedy like Eddie Murphy
was just coming at you, Kinnison and Bill Hicks.
And then Bob Newhart had this way
of just creating his little world that you went to.
Yeah, he really, I mean, it was like,
it was, I guess, like watching a movie or show.
Like you're just in your, it had the I mean, it was like, it was, I guess, like watching a movie or show, like you're just in your,
it had the pace of it that was a different pace.
That's a little bit how I felt when I discovered
Nichols in May, which, which was like in high school for me,
like that idea of those albums being,
not just like these sketch records,
but like what I then later found out were like,
began as improv
scenes, you know, like, and what, how, as I was getting into improv and, and doing that
in college and stuff, finding out that that their process was improvising and then writing
and, and honing those things, but that there was improv in there. Like they were so massive
to me in a way that felt similar to Bob Newhart in that it was quieter and not
as bombastic as especially what was you're talking about like Kenison and Dice and a
generation in my neck of the woods, Lenny Clark, people who were loud, loud, brash,
you know, outspoken, outrageous, you know, standups were the what was happening. So to
discover like these kind of more mild mannered, you know, and thenups were the, what was happening. So to discover like these kind of more mild mannered,
you know, and then quieter, very hilarious,
whether it's Bob Newhart or Nichols and May,
or, you know, all that stuff to discover it in like,
on old tapes or old records in parents'
or somebody's record collection was incredible.
Well, that's why, I don't know if you ever saw a movie
called When Stand-Up Stood Out.
It's about the Boston comedy scene.
Oh yeah, the ding ho. Talk about the Boston comedy scene. Yeah, Frank Solomito.
The Ding Ho.
Talk about the Ding Ho.
The Ding Ho.
And so the story was that all these guys
like Glennie Clark and Steve Sweeney and Kenny Rogerson.
Jimmy Tingle.
Jimmy Tingle.
And they would all come out, Rich Zeisler.
And they would all come out.
Kevin Meany.
Kevin Meany.
Oh, wow. The best. Kevin Meany. Kevin Meany. Oh, wow.
The best.
Kevin Meany.
The best.
I've never seen anybody kill an audience
the way Kevin Meany would kill an audience.
It was so powerful and so unique and squeaky clean.
It was amazing.
I will say this, this documentary
that Greg's talking about right now
is available currently to stream.
It's called When Stand Up Stood Out.
It's up still.
But one of the stories is about how all these
very aggressive in your face comics,
because Boston crowds were rough.
Still, they still are.
They're still, and it's union guys that are like,
you're not funnier than me, prove it.
And so you have to prove it.
And then, so they all had a showcase.
The guy at the time that booked the Tonight Show,
I can't remember the guy's name,
but he had heard about this Boston comedy scene.
And so he books a trip to Boston,
he goes down to the Ding Ho,
and they all come out and they're all doing blow
in the green room and they're doing shots
and they go on stage and they're doing jokes
about chicks hair and revere and what it's like
to get in a fist fight at the laughing lobster.
Yeah, Kelly's roast beef.
And the guy from the tonight show is going,
what is going on here?
And then Steven Wright comes out,
they put him out at the end and he comes out
and he does well, doesn't kill like the other guys do.
And the next week he's on the Tonight Show
and they're all standing there going like,
Steve, like Don Gavin once tried to talk Steven
out of doing comedy because he felt bad for him.
Yeah.
Wow.
Incredible, incredible.
Like, and at the time, you know,
like Lenny Clark is the king of Boston stand And at the time, you know, like, Lenny Clark is the king of Boston stand-up at that time.
You know, like, and he is big and loud, and it is.
You're right. It's like tons of local specific stuff.
And so to have quiet, mild-mannered Steven Wright
just annihilating all the way through to The Tonight Show,
and then gets on The Tonight Show again,
like a month later or two weeks later or something,
and just blows up.
Incredible.
I just watched, I just rewatched,
because somebody sent it to me, it's on YouTube,
The Appointments of Dennis Jennings,
Steven Wright's short film with Rowan Atkinson,
and it is so fucking funny.
By the way, I know we're talking about different stamps.
I just saw Paula Poundstone, two weeks ago, It is so fucking funny. By the way, I know we're talking about different stamps.
I just saw Paula Poundstone two weeks ago.
We were at this library event,
like the Comic Con for Libraries,
and watching her crush, like at that,
she didn't even know when she was going up.
She came out, and I think it's always that thing
where it's like, oh, how much of this is written,
but I was like, I've just only seen her on tape.
I never went to one of her live shows.
And she was one of those people that was like,
oh, she just held this room, last person up of the night.
People, I don't even know if they wanted to go,
but she could have kept on going for an hour and a half.
You know, it's like people were so on board.
It was really, it was fun to see.
And she's another one of those people
that falls in the category of absolute Teflon.
Like, no, she's funny.
She's not hanging on your approval of her in any way.
Not insecure about like whether or not this is going well
or anything like that.
Just crush it.
She told a story that, again,
I don't know if this is part of her routine
or if this is her talking, but she was like
she got obsessed with like matlock and she'd only write to
Matlock and she would go to sleep to matlock and then when she woke up she'd watch matlock and it was like matlock was always on
Every part of her life like matlock and she had DVDs and she'd bring around a DVD player
Would you go to hotel she get it and then she finally?
And she'd bring around a DVD player, would you go to a hotel, she'd get it.
And then she finally, like the technology
surpassed the ability to watch Matlock.
And then she finally got into Breaking Bad.
And now all she does is, like, she's like every,
like I'm on the treadmill, I'm watching Breaking Bad,
I'm writing watching Breaking Bad,
I'm going to sleep watching.
She's like, I've watched it literally like 55 times
from start to finish.
Just watching it over and over again.
It was such an interesting insight on just a brain.
Like it's just like, I need one thing
that I'm familiar with on nonstop.
And I was like, I really just want to go in.
I want to be like, what is that like?
What is that?
Dig into that, that's fascinating.
I was blown away by the fact that she only just wants it.
She's like literally every waking part of my day,
it is playing in the background.
Yeah, yeah.
I get like that with audio books.
If I find an audio book that I really like,
I go to sleep with it and I set my timer for 45 minutes.
And I want a book with a narrator who is calm and dry and I want material
that is completely uninteresting to me.
Yeah, right.
So like I listened to the biography of Hubert Humphrey,
maybe seven or eight times in a row
and it's like a 28 hour biography.
How much have you retained at all, if anything?
Ask me one question.
Exactly, exactly.
I have nothing, nothing.
Well, cause I also take a sleeping pill every night.
So not only am I falling asleep, I'm drunk.
Oh, that's so funny.
Yeah.
Well, Greg, you're special,
available on your YouTube channel right now.
You can watch it.
You can listen to you on podcasts.
You can basically, you're very easy to find.
You're easy to listen to.
I'm sure as people say that they fall asleep to us,
I'm sure people fall asleep to you in a good way.
People, you know, and so,
FitzDog Radio, Childish with Alison Rosen
and Sunday Papers with Mike Gibbons.
Those are the podcasts.
The special is, You Know Me, it's gonna be on,
it is on YouTube.
And The Earthquake was a 4.7.
Wow!
No!
Wow!
That is a 4.7.
Damn!
That's like- Holy cow!
Yeah.
That's big.
So there we go.
That's no joke.
Yeah.
No joke indeed.
Thanks so much for being here, Greg.
All right, thanks for having me on.
You guys are the best.
Great to see you, Greg.
All right, good to see you.
All right, people, I hope you enjoyed our chat
with Greg Fitzsimmons, but it is finally time
to announce our next movie.
And for the first time in over a year,
we will be releasing, yes, an in-studio episode.
That's right, next week we will be saying goodbye
to wedding rings and hello to magic rings,
because in advance of our live virtual show on Troll 2,
we decided to go to the original 1986 fantasy horror film Troll, which has nothing to do with
Troll 2, but features a standout performance by Sonny Bono and Julia Louis-Dreyfus. Here is a
breakdown of the plot. A wicked troll king invades a San Francisco
apartment complex in search for a mystical ring
that will transform him into a human.
Is it a child's film?
Is it an adult horror?
We don't know.
Anyway, Rotten Tomatoes gives this film a 30% score
on the tomato meter and Mike Massey
from Gone With The Twins writes,
everyone seems to get a dance scene all for the sake of embarrassing themselves beyond simply
participating in this movie. And you know what, Mike, I did not recognize that when we watched
the movie the first time, but now that you said it, how could I have missed it? Anyway,
listen to the trailer for Troll. Once upon a time when the world was filled with wonder,
little creatures shared the earth with humans and magic was a
way of life. Once upon a time is now Empire Pictures presents
Troll, the weirdest, the rowdiest, the most mischievous,
and the scariest little creature of them all.
Now, okay, get ready.
This movie is worth watching,
but there are a few movies out there named Troll.
So if you wanna watch the right one,
make sure you're watching Troll, made in 1986 with Sonny Bono, Julia Weas-Dreyfus,
and is available to stream on Amazon Prime Video,
Free V2V, Pluto TV, and the Roku Channel.
But separately, I encourage you to check out Hoopla,
Canopy, and Libby, which are digital media services
offered by your local public library
that allow you to consume movies, TV, music,
audio books, eBooks, and comics for free.
I love this service and I'll tell you,
so many people have been listening to my book
on these services and it's great.
So support your public library.
They are more than just a library.
All right, people, that is it for last looks.
And if you listen on
Apple Podcasts or Spotify, listen to me! Please make sure you're following us
and you have automatic downloads turned on. That is important, it helps the show.
You can also rate and review us, that also helps. You can visit us on social
media and I want to shout out the Action Jackson 5 for making our opening theme
song and a big thank you to our producers Scott Sonny and Molly Reynolds
and our movie picking producer Averill Halley, our associate producer Jess Cisneros
and our engineer Casey Holford. We'll see you next week for Troll 1986.