How Did This Get Made? - Matinee Monday: Cats

Episode Date: November 18, 2024

On the first ever live-streamed HDTGM episode, Paul, June, and Jason discuss the 2019 musical Cats. They talk about what exactly is a “Jellicle,” naked cats, magic, the existence of the butthole cut, and much more. Plus, some very special guests share their thoughts on the movie!(Originally Released 11/19/2020) Tix on sale for Philly live show on Nov 16th and holiday virtual live show on Dec 12th! Go to hdtgm.com for ticket info, merch, and for more on bad movies.Order Paul’s book about his childhood: Joyful Recollections of TraumaFor extra content on Matinee Monday movies, visit Paul's YouTube page: youtube.com/paulscheerTalk bad movies on the HDTGM Discord: discord.gg/hdtgmPaul’s Discord: discord.gg/paulscheerFollow Paul’s movie recs on Letterboxd: letterboxd.com/paulscheer/Check out new HDTGM movie merch over at teepublic.com/stores/hdtgmPaul and Rob Huebel stream live on Twitch every Thursday 8-10pm EST: www.twitch.tv/friendzoneLike good movies too? Subscribe to Unspooled with Paul and Amy Nicholson: listen.earwolf.com/unspooledSubscribe to The Deep Dive with Jessica St. Clair and June Diane Raphael: www.thedeepdiveacademy.com/podcastWhere to find Paul, June, & Jason:@PaulScheer on Instagram & Twitter@Junediane on IG and @MsJuneDiane on TwitterJason is not on social mediaGet access to all the podcasts you love, music channels and radio shows with the SiriusXM App! Get 3 months free using the link: siriusxm.com/hdtgm.

Ladies and gentlemen, a special announcement from Andrew Lloyd Webber. Greetings loyal subjects of the Majesty and Queen Elizabeth II and others. Welcome to this very special edition of Cor Blimey! What could have caused this to happen? I am Lord Andrew Lloyd Webber, the composer of the Broadway musical, Cats! Now what you're about to see is an hilarious skewering of the filmic version of that motion picture, Cats! I of course was involved and expected to make just a ton of money. I, of course, was involved and expected to make just a ton of money. Before you see this special live podcast, I'd like to set the record straight on one or two things.

There are certain things that the musical, the Broadway stage musical is responsible for and there are certain things that the film adaptation is responsible for, and there are certain things that the filmic adaptation is responsible for. Now then, the Broadway Musical is responsible for not explaining what a Jellicle Cat is, ever. You understand, entertainment was in its infancy. People were willing to pay top dollar to watch unknown actors put on unitards and paste whiskers on their faces,

walk out on stage and say, I'm a jellicle cat, won't tell you what that is. Here's my name, here's what I do, and then they fuck off out of it, and another one comes in and does exactly the same thing. Repeat until the Glamourpuss Grizzabella is raised to cat heaven on an old tire. Now then, here is what the film is responsible for. Old dialogue. We didn't

have dialogue on the stage show. Everyone was doing cocaine. It was a break from talking. Cockroaches. We didn't have them on the stage. We shouldn't have had them in the film. They just shouldn't be. Taylor Swift's accent. Jason Derulo. He's fine in the film, I think. I just wanted to do the meme. fine in the film I think I just wanted to do the meme. Mucus. There's an unfortunate amount of mucus in the film. We did not have the mucus on stage. Backstage of course. Oh buckets of the stuff. Judy Dench Jim Halperting into the camera multiple times at the end. I don't know what she's doing. She's a dame. You can't tell them anything. And finally, the uncanny valley of all of it, the weirdness, the terrible

feeling in your stomach as you watch it, hoping that these things are not real. Now then, enjoy a little nibble of whatever substance alters your personality completely. Sit back, relax, and enjoy this special live episode of What in the World? Did you see that this has come into existence? Is there any explanation? This is Andrew Lloyd Webber signing off! People, hold on to your buttholes and your cat buttholes. We saw cats, so you know what that means. Now it's time to vote us

on a discrimin- D-O-S-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O And take a bullet speed to hit the cruise control J-Man, Big Paul and the brutal June Gonna take you from the pool while the waves run Rain again to streak by, they hope to blow off steam Just a sucker punch the iron line for tipping Break shot middle to murder demig, how you standin' alive? They callin' him a badass and he's on the line Crankin' A to Z letters cause they cool as ice Cause they're bad Jim Brownie lookin' kind of nice Callin' June, gettin' literal, Jason is gettin' lame June is making sure all the monkey shots get paid Yes!

Hello people of Earth and hello virtual people of the world. This is our very first live virtual show. We are in the middle of some intense tech issues. Hopefully, everything will work out perfectly. But speaking of tech issues, what better show to have tech issues than to talk about the film Cats? Because Cats is one giant technical issue. I mean, really, people, I cannot wait to talk about the film Cats. Because Cats is one giant technical issue. I mean, really, people, I cannot wait to talk about this film with you. I mean, it is a Jellicle night for a

Jellicle podcast about some Jellicle damn cats. I don't know what Jellicle means, but tonight we're going to try to get to the bottom of that and so, so many other questions. Let's do it people. Let's break it all down the best way I know how by introducing my cohost, Mr. Jason Manzoukas. Welcome Jason. Fuck you people. Whoa, hey.

Not you, Paul. Wow. Not you, Paul. Okay, thank you. I'm here, I'm talking to the audience. I'm talking to you motherfuckers who made me seven months into isolation, watch cats. I don't have the emotional capacity to have just watched cats. This is an act of aggression.

This is the salve that we all need to get through the time that we are in. I swear to God, if someone, if goddamn anybody says the word Jellicle, I'm gonna have a complete nervous breakdown. I don't have it. I don't have it left. I don't have anything left to give. And you made me watch what is, like I think a war crime? It is definitely an assault on all the senses. And I'm saying that in taste and smell, which this movie does not necessarily have, but my senses felt assaulted.

I don't, I watched it, I just watched it. I feel unwell, I feel unclean. I feel like a way that if I felt this way in normal circumstances, I would take myself to the hospital to say, what is wrong with me? But I can't do that. I can't just walk into an ER right now and be diagnosed with fucking cat's fever

or whatever I just got. But this was a stone cold nightmare. Well, look, I normally at the top of the show will try to break down what the movie is in case you've not seen the movie. I can't really do that with this film. This is nothing. This I don't understand it. This is not there is no plot. There is just this movie is just a series of introductions of cats that then immediately leave the movie.

What the fuck is this? What is this nightmare? I will say this much. I didn't realize until about almost an hour and 40 minutes in that there is not a single spoken word in this film up until like one line, I believe. Yeah, barely. And it doesn't seem, they don't seem to distinguish between what should be spoken and what should be sung.

I was, it's arbitrary. The word ineffable is sung so many times. You can't put ineffable in a music. What are you doing? You can't put, you know, that's a straight brag from Andrew Lloyd Webber. That's a straight brag being like, I'm not gonna just put ineffable in here once.

I'm gonna put it in a lot. I'm gonna fucking drown you in dumb words, in dumb songs, with basic, fuck this movie. I wish I'd been able to see buttholes. But give me buttholes. Give me buttholes, give me p-p-p-buttholes so that I can watch, to distract me from the nightmare that is this movie.

We're gonna pick it apart, and we're slightly spelling right now, because June is still going through some technical issues. But I'll say this to you, Jason. I'm on fire. I have so much, there's so much to say. And I'm so happy that we're doing this in a visual medium for people that are here tonight.

Because we're gonna have to get- I don't wanna see, I don't wanna have to re-look at any of it. I don't wanna have to look at, I don't wanna see cats ever again. I don't wanna hear cats ever again. I don't wanna hear these songs ever again. I don't want to hear cats ever again. I don't want to hear these songs ever again. I don't ever want to hear the word jellicle or rum tum tugger.

I don't want to hear any, I don't want to hear these names. This movie is gross. Not since the garbage pail kid have I felt a disgust. And I tell you, I hate those fucking tails and I hate those ears. They're moving way too much. Like you know what? You would think there would be,

you would almost think, hey, maybe there's something sexy about these cats dancing and walking around and, you know, dancing and doing all their biz. No, there's nothing sexy about these cats. It is unnerving. Not even naked Idris Elba at the very end of the film. It's upset. Idris.

Like, I was like, oh no, they got Idris? Oh no! All right, well let's bring in a person who's gonna have a lot to say. My other co-host, Miss June Diane Rayfield. Welcome June, how are you? Oh my gosh. Oh, oh my word. Oh my lord. Oh, my Lord.

We've already been on a journey. We have. I'm happy to be here. I am. Wow. I've been over here like a curious kitten waiting to get on. No, June, no. I have, like a curious, curious cat. And I want to talk about the cat physicality. No, dude, stop it. Stop it.

That happened in this movie and where? Because it came and went. It came and it went. There was sort of like, there were no rules to when cats were cats and when they were just sort of talking, like people. Well, can I just say that the actors in this movie went to cat school. Did you know that? They studied cats.

No, they didn't. I would like to know. If they did, it would have been a better movie. I'm gonna show you. You're saying like a walking dead when they go to like zombie school? First of all, how do you know about the walking dead? I know things.

Huge reveal from you. I mean, this is what you just said was the most shocking thing out of your mouth. I almost feel like we should stop the show to just talk about this right now. Listen, I've never seen it, but I did, you know, I have a desire. So what's interesting about that is like, I have a desire. I what's interesting about that is like a desire. I have a desire to go to cat school. OK, I have a desire. I miss being in acting school.

I miss like being seaweed on the ground and like all of the weird shit. I will say acting conservatory. I applied to Cat University and I did not get in. Oh, me. I did not get in. So, meow. Did not get in. Meow. So I have a deep interest in like zombie school. Jella no, you're a Jella no cat. Go ahead. Take a look at a little bit of cat school. Oh God, do we have to?

Oh. Oh. If you told me I was gonna get to go to cat school every day for work, what? And I'm like, how does a human portray being a cat? Learning about cats and what their mainisms and body language and their way of communication, what it all meant was so helpful. This lovely lady, Sarah, who just makes us super aware of the way cats move.

Oh my god. Sarah, who worked with all the cast have movement specials. We called organic cat Why was grizzabella called the glimmer cat and how much of that is left in her now that she's broken down and how do you put That into a cat. It's very much about the time. All right. Oh good. I'm sick with there Wait a second. I'm sorry. I'm so sorry. So, okay. Because here's, I want to start at the very beginning. I want to stop. I want to stop the whole podcast. I want to walk away. Okay. I want to end this. I thought for sure this is, the narrative here the story what I'm gonna walk away with is gonna be so much more Than about like the story is gonna be much more than just about cats

Hmm how wrong you are out When you say story June when you say story, what do you mean by that? Okay, so here's the thing the story was going to be more about because I'm asking only because repeatedly through my notes, I wrote, what is the story of this movie? What is the plot that these songs are meant to illustrate? Well, I wrote down in my notes, I said this, I go, can we just stop for a second and just comprehend

that this is not a bad movie. This is a movie that is a full on adaptation of one of the longest running Broadway musicals. This is a, like, they didn't change much. It wasn't like, oh, they adapted it weirdly. This was on Broadway longer than most things ever. How did this go big? How did this go big? Yeah, real question.

I have a real question for both of you. What's that? things ever. Real question. I have a real question for both of you. Going into this movie, did you know that the cats were supposed to be scaled to the size of real cats? Well, that's not true. The cats in this movie are the scale of regular house cats. No, nothing is rightly scaled, because sometimes there's like a cemetery plot that's like 10 foot tall, and then they're next to...

The movie's trying to tell us that, again, the movie also... Like Hobbit style. The movie also lets cats arbitrarily walk on hind legs and walk on all fours, who cares? Like there are no rules, but when it occurred to me, when they framed up on pieces of the movie where the cats were in scale, when it's the Rebel Wilson scene

and she's in a giant kitchen, I was like, fuck this movie forever, fuck everything forever. Like I don't, I can't live like this. Here's what's so weird though, because I was watching the movie and I was like, oh, this will the, and by the way, I've never seen Cats on Broadway. Has anyone seen this show on Broadway?

Okay. No. But I've heard it's a faithful adaptation. Oh, that's interesting. Okay, so I knew enough. I mean, I was a huge Les Mis fan growing up. I saw the show 16 times. I saw Phantom a number of times, but I did know to steer clear of cats.

Like something in my body was reacting to the poster. So I knew enough. Well, we grew up in New York and I feel like I was inundated with ads when I would watch Regis and Kathie Lee ads for Broadway. All day long. All day, cause it was like local. I'm so sorry. I'm so sorry. What, Regis and Kathie Lee ads for Broadway. All day long. All day, cause it was like a little- I'm so sorry.

Yeah, what? I'm so sorry. What, Regis and Kathie Lee? Why as a child are you watching Regis and Kathie Lee so much? Oh, it was- I watched Regis and Kathie Lee from first grade on. What?

It was the show to watch. It was like, oh, I'm homesick. I get to watch Regis and Kathie Lee. It was like, it felt like late night TV. That show for me was Get Smart, which was on at noon. You're telling me you wanted to stay home sick so you could watch Regis and Kathy Lee? I would wake up on the summers.

I would wake up at 8 a.m., head to Channel 7, Eyewitness News, and I would watch Lucy from eight to nine, or eight to eight thirty, or eight thirty to nine, and then watch Regis. Okay, wow, that's mind blowing. So the only way that, the only thing that I know about cats is like these commercials that they would air for cats.

And it would be like people coming out of the theater being like, I love cats, cats is amazing. And they would play the memory song. And there was this like giant flying saucer. And like one of the cats is on a flying saucer and it's like flying up to heaven and all the other cats are like pawing at it like, ah, ah, and I was like-

Yeah, that image of like a cat. See, this was the image that we saw was like that. For years, for a decade I saw that. And I thought, I mean, I knew to be a bit distrustful of Andrew Lloyd Webber. Like I knew enough after seeing Phantom, I knew that he wasn't where it's at. But this... Because I kept on watching it and thinking,

oh, my God, like, the musical, this must be such a poor adaptation of what was an incredible stage production. But halfway through, I was like, no, there's actually no way. They... Every song is just an introduction of a cat and every song's lyrics are just that cat's name and a couple of other lines repeated over and over and over again.

It's like none of the songs illustrate character, illustrate theme, illustrate plot. But in a way, Jason, in a way, as a dog person, in a way, as a dog person, I was like, actually, and listen, I know there's a lot of people watching this show right now, and I wanna mind my P's and Q's, but as a dog person, I will say,

it did seem like, well, that's all we can say. That's all we can say about cats, is their name and like two things. But wait a second, that Jellicle song. Oh my god. That Jellicle song, they're all fucking, everyone's a Jellicle cat, right? What's a Jellicle? What is a Jellicle? I'm not kidding. What's a Jellicle? Real talk right now. Tell me, what's a Jellicle?

We actually do have a clip. Okay, so I think a Jellicle. Because cause I wanna say I didn't do any, I saw the movie, I didn't do any research on it. I really wanted to come here and just have like an authentic, honest experience of the motion picture. But I think you did too, Paul, cause I need to show up with your little reports. I have some reports, but I did not watch the clips

because I really wanted to experience- How little are your reports, Paul? Are they on tiny notebooks? I would love it if you pulled up like a little tiny book. Yes. I got a lot of notes. So I know you show up, but when I'm actually watching some of these movies with you,

I know you're as baffled as I am. Oh, I'm not, I did not, I did, here's what I'm gonna say. We do have an answer for what a Jellicle cat is. I don't know what that answer is. So I can enjoy this conversation with you. Okay, great. So I think a Jellicle cat is a cat that can be reincarnated. So I think a Jellicle cat is a cat that can live

many, many lives. And once it's done with its like time on this earth, A Jellicle cat is a cat that can live many, many lives. And once it's done with its like time on this earth, can head out in a hot air balloon and then be born again. I understand that, right? So, okay, so let's say that that's true. So only the Jellicle cats are able to qualify for the ball that gives you some sort of

transformative immortality, right? Which is like once a year, like it's a New Year's kind of tradition. Yeah. Rebel Wilson is identified as a gummy cat. Well, I wrote down, she's still part of the competition. She's not a Jellicle Cat, but I think that gummy cats, gummy cats and curious cats and glamor cats and Bravo cats are all Jellicle cats. Because here's my theory.

If this is true, I swear to God, I'm capable of murder. Okay, so this is what I think it is. Every cat on this earth has the, okay, I have not watched anything, I have not read anything, I purposely was like this. I believe this is a story about God. We are all made in the image of God. So we are all evangelical cats.

We all can be God-like. That's what I think. And so we all like, so every one of us can ultimately be in the image of God. You could be a job if you were in that world. We need to also figure out our humans in this world because I have some questions about that. Well, yes, because there are,

because that's who throws away the Victoria at the beginning of the movie. I'm a human. By the way, just so you know, Jason, Paul thought that that main cat was Taylor Swift for an hour and 15 minutes. Oh, I didn't think it for that long, but at the beginning, I thought it,

because I knew she was in the movie But I think it is but yeah For almost the entirety of the movie I think the minute the minute she spoke with a British accent. I was like there is no way this is Taylor Or when she was dancing around on point. Oh my god, by the way Why are you why are you disbelieving that if Taylor Swift put her mind to it, she could get point? Listen, I am a Swiftie. I love Taylor Swift, but what, actually the one thing I appreciate about her

is that she's kind of like a gangly, you know, her posture's pretty bad. Like what she isn't is a dancer. Well, but as far as I was concerned, this movie is essentially made with deep fake technology. It's basically just putting the faces, it's putting the faces of all these actors onto dancers' bodies, right?

These people are not doing these motions, dancers are, and just their faces are being swapped, right? No, no, no, they went to cat school. They went to cat school. They went to cat school. No, Jason. The cat school can't teach Ian McKellen and Judi Dench how to dance like these cats.

But the dancing is so basic though. There's one at the big, by the way. The dancing is so basic. At the big ball scene, they're literally going like, one, two, one, two, it is complete. There's no dancing. The moves are so, I don't think it's that great. I said in my notes, I was like, it's so repetitive.

It appears as though children wrote and choreographed all of this. Like, if you told me kids invented cats, I would believe you. Okay, well, here's what I will say. I want to get to the Jellicle because we're too far away from it. By the way, maybe there's something we're not understanding. So what is a Jellicle Cat poll? Let me get into that. I just wanna just pop one thing that Jason said,

which is this. This is a deep cut, but Francis Ford Coppola was given like $20 million to make a ride for Disney World. It was called Captain EO, and it was Michael Jackson, essentially as like Han Solo. And that is a cocaine fueled nightmare

where it's like, we're making a Michael Jackson Star Wars movie. And it has the same exact energy of cats. And I feel like they were made at the same time. And I feel like this is a time when we were giving creators lots of money and they were just high as fucking kites. And I know that's like a cheap way to say it, but I believe it.

Paul, this movie came out last year. I know, but I'm saying, but they're, it's an adaptation, but it's an adaptation. It's just that it's, they're, this movie came out last year. I know, but I'm saying that there, it's an adaptation. But it's an adaptation. It's just that they're just taking the thing. Yes, but I think, Paul, I think that the stage production, having never seen it,

I think it's much better. Because the problem is, here's what's so weird. Like I can imagine in terms of scale, like small, like regular, you know, scale, cats, cats. I don't feel safe of scale, like small, like regular, you know, scale cats. I don't feel safe. Cats, cats.

Oh no. Ah! Cats, cats that are made to scale look on stage when you see big, you know, a big like fire hydrant. Like that's interesting. That's okay. That's cool to look at. The weird thing about this movie. Well. The weird thing about this movie,

well, the weird thing about this movie is like with all, with the freedom of cinema, they don't tell a better story. Oh, I do not call this cinema. Do not. This is beyond cinema. Guys, but I'm serious. If we were to see, if we were to see these costumes,

okay, and first of all, there's not a single. Do not call these costumes. There's not a single, Jason, there is not a single body type that looks good in these costumes. These aren't costumes, this is all CG. It's all CG. There's no costumes.

Why are you saying that? There's no costumes. There are costumes, they're wearing something over their bodies. They're wearing, I think. They look like they're wearing fucking sweatsuits. Can I just show you this one article that I pulled up? Cause this is actually great. Averill Halley, one of our producers who helps find all these movies.

She found this article. I want to show up article two here. This is what Jason Derulo had to say about his costume. Jason Derulo says, much to his dismay, his penis and cats is smaller than he would have liked. He goes, they see the same thing. had to say about his costume. Jason Derulo. Say Jason Derulo says, much to his dismay, his penis and cat is smaller than he would have liked. He goes, they CGI'd the dick out. Oh my God.

Rum Tum Tiger thinks that he does not have, he was a- Rum Tum Tugger. Which is a great character name for someone who wants his dick to be more featured. Here's the thing though, what's so strange about the fact that you can't see any like

outlines of genitalia. I mean, I didn't know I would miss it as much as I did. Like if there was something so unsettling about seeing humans standing upright with human faces and cat ears with no breasts and no genitalia. There was, it was unsettling. All right, well let's get- Also this, I have a question. What are, what's the, what's the, what's the point of clothes?

Okay, well I want- Tell me, why are they wearing clothes sometimes? Check, if you are a cat owner right now, check your cat for a full body zipper or see if they can be unzipped to reveal more fur but clothing underneath because that happens in this movie. She actually has two outfits on but let's go let's actually answer the question of what Jellicle is. This is uh this is Judy Dench.

I don't want to know. I don't even want to... Awww. Here we go. I believe you truly are a Jellicle cat. A Jellicle cat. Why? How is this part of the movie? Wait, wait, wait.

What? Wait, she didn't really explain what it is. I guess I'm looking now here. She just said, I guess she said, I mean, it doesn't really. They don't explain it. You know what? I have an update. They don't explain it.

They just say the word Jellicle upwards of 250 times in one hour and 50 minutes. I'm gonna say something else. I'm gonna say something else, Paul. What I was looking forward to was the music. And there was only one moment in the movie. I have that ready, but hold on. No, there was only one moment in the movie. Oh, I have that ready. There was only one moment in the movie where I really enjoyed

the music and that's when Jennifer Hudson's voice was finally allowed to open up. Here's the thing. The rest of the movie is people talking like this and saying Jellicle, saying names, saying names of cats. This is a musical. The ball is tonight. Magic is the cat. Here we go.

Up and down. Here we go. Around the town. Cat, cat, cat, cat, cat, cat. Here we go. Here we go. This is cat. Ring the doorbell.

Steal the fish. Now I'm wearing a necklace. That's the fucking movie. I want to hear singers sing. When Jennifer Hudson sings, it's the only time there is emotion conveyed in the movie. When she sings both times, when she sings outside by the street post

and when she sings inside, it is electric to watch because she is so compelling, she is so emotive and what she's singing, I think is an emotion-filled song. More emotive than the Rebel Wilson song? What she's singing, I think, is an emotion-filled song. But- More emotive than the Rebel Wilson song? More emotive than every single other person who sings. Because everybody else is just singing,

here we go, we're going over here, now we're over here, look in the door, the door is this and here we go now, what's up? Let's just give, if you ever see the movie, this is the best part of the movie. This is Jennifer Hudson's part that we just talked about here. ["The Little Mermaid"]

Can't see! Can't see! This is beautiful. What the man! Fantastic! Unequivocal. Of my chase in the sun. It's crazy to see her now.

It's crazy to see a cat now having been away from the cats for so long. Yeah, you accept that this is normal. I've been away from the cats now for about almost 24 hours. So to go back in and to see them, this is my favorite moment of the movie, to see them now is so shocking.

Is that Anne Hathaway? I just watched it like an hour ago. So this to me- You're still with the cast. I'm still inside of it and it feels to me like, still like, ugh, like I'm gonna wake up from a nightmare every time. I will have nightmares tonight. Oh, it's still going?

Yeah, we can end it. No, it's fine. I mean, listen, I mean it when I say that, we're all in agreement. That's the best part. OK, and by the way, I said to you, Paul, last night. I'm sorry I'm screaming. No, I love that we're all pointing. We're all doing it.

It's the best. I said to Paul last night after that song, I said, can you rewind it? I'd like to hear it again. Now, I have had to sit through so many of the films that we've watched on this podcast. And I have had to sit through so many of the films that we've watched on this podcast. And so have I.

So many, so much terrible content. So have I. You know we all have. But Paul, I know, but the one time I say, you know what? I'd actually, I would actually like to hear that again. Roll the tapes, like, please rewind. And Paul said, no. Whoa. I could not believe.

And then June got up. Can I ask the question, is that why you guys are broadcasting from different rooms? Well, June got- Oh, we don't live together, Jason. No, we are not. We have an old 1950s relationship. We have two beds on separate sides of the house.

In separate houses. What makes you hear about couples though who live in separate houses and function together as married couples? That is, and I'm not saying I want that. I'm really not, but that is, I see how I don't want to like walk the same stand. I see how, how it works.

By the way, if we did that, you would, right now you would not be on this stream yard if that was the case. As I'm running, I'm running down the stairs to pass off extra computers. I will say this. I will say this. And then as June said to me, right before the show started, I have been having issues with this computer.

I have been. This reminds me. This reminds me. I have been having side issues with my computer. I've been having a lot of audio issues. Here's what I wanna say. I did rewind it, or June actually rewound it, and then I went to bed.

I was very tired. I had to get up early this morning. And what did I hear? Click, the TV went back on. June found that scene again, played it again, three times in a row. And then when that was off, started singing it in the kitchen at like midnight, belting it out.

I was in. Touch me, it's so easy to leave me. I mean, it was. Amazing. So here's the thing about the movie, the voices never open up and that was the one time and I had been waiting for it. And I did love Jennifer Hudson's choices there and when

she went soft and spoke it out and when she opened up there the only time there was like a note that was ever sustained in this musical question mark. I did love it. I think that song is stunning. I think that song is absolutely beautiful. My only critique is that she did, the only critique I have of this film is that she did the kind of Anne Hathaway in Les Mis, I Dreamed a Dream, like snot running down the nose. Yeah, it was very Viola Davis in Fences, I felt like.

Is it snot or was it tears that had run into her? Was it tears that had run into her nose or was snot? No, that was snot. It's snot. Okay, definitely snot. And I feel like, well, just a few years earlier. I just wanna make sure you're saying it's snot, not it's not, right?

No, I'm not saying it's not. I'm saying it's snot. It's snot. Is this how Gus, this is how our son like learns how to like blend. It's snot. No, June, you would not blend two different words. They blend the one word.

So they go like, mm. It's snot. No, it'd be a snot. Yeah, snot, there it is. It's, it's, it's not. No, it'd be a snot. Yeah, snot. There it is. It's not. It's not. It's not. I wanna just, I wanna put a cap on what Jellicle means.

In the chat, people are kind of coming at us about what Jellicle. Where's the chat? Hey, hey, audience, don't come at us. I don't need to hear from you. You're all the balcony as far as I'm concerned. Kristen Marie says this, she says, the name Jellicle comes from an unpublished poem by T.S. Eliot entitled,

Policia, Dogs, Angelical Cats, where police dogs is corruption or poor little dogs, angelical is dear little cats. So this is also, this is not only a musical, this is based on a T.S. Eliot poem. No thanks. No, it's not. No, it's not.

I have an update. It's not. It can't be. It can't be. It's not. I'm saying it's snot. It's snot. The poem is snot. Like it's literally flat.

It is an unpublished- And what I am saying is it's not based on that. Ha-ha-ha-ha! Can I just bring up one thing here too? Because there's so many things I want to talk about. Um, I just felt like, first of all, I feel like there's no fault here. Everyone committed to their roles,

and I do want to call that out. I think it's a flawed film, but I was... I mean, like, I'm going gonna start by blaming Andrew Lloyd Webber. Yes. I mean, like, there were- That's where, by the way, most of the blame should be placed. Yes! Yes! But I wanna blame everyone who read this script and thought,

yeah, I wanna do this. This is my next big project. Listen, I mean- You said to me, poor Jennifer Hudson. I looked at you and I said, what do you mean, poor Jennifer Hudson? She agreed to do it, gotten that suit. I know, but I like her.

Well, she wasn't forced, that's what I'm saying. Like she must've read some, like Idris Elba, one of the most in demand actors is like, I feel like I gotta do McCavity, like McCavity is me. Here's what I wanna know, and this is for real, and this is a real question for both of you. I hate musicals, hard stop, right? I'm not interested.

Not interested. What have you seen? Everything, right? I mean like- June talked to him about Les Mis. Not interested in Les Mis. Not interested. Have you seen it?

Yes, I have. Have you seen it? Yes, yes, I have. I saw it both on stage and I saw the movie. You shouldn't say that, Jason. I don't enjoy when people in the play I'm enjoying start singing. It seems jarring.

I did notice about you. And it's unnecessary. You know what? It is. It's not. For me, I'm not interested in musicals. So this isn't for me. And that's a limitation for you.

And you know what? This is this I'm living in. I'm living in this world. I'm out in these streets hating music. That's OK. But you've seen Hamilton? Yes, I've seen Hamilton. I thought, see what I enjoyed about Hamilton

was it is sung from start to finish. It is there is no dialogue. So is this. There's literally two lines of dialogue. But there should have no dialogue. So is this. There's literally two lines of dialogue in this. But there should have been dialogue. Hamilton does a good job telling a story inside of the songs and illustrating character and illustrating theme.

Right, there's no story here. Hamilton is an incredibly... I mean, how do you feel about Sondheim? Sondheim, very interesting, and I enjoy stuff I've seen, but it doesn't connect with me the way that music does or the way that plays do. Somehow the fusion, I think maybe because I wasn't raised with musicals or I don't know what, but it just seems to me like I'm like, oh, here we go singing.

I don't need this right now. I like musicals because I think I have my first make out during a musical. Okay. How do I get, how do I exit this? What, what, what musical were you and your mom seeing? We saw it is so inappropriate to make out during a musical. It's a live show. There are actors on stage. What are you talking about? Me and my girl, we went on a school trip and- My girl, a VHS copy of the movie My Girl? The direct to Broadway adaptation of My Girl 2, oddly.

I don't know why that got in there. So you made out during a live performance of a musical while actors- Were singing for me. Who can barely afford to live in New York City were doing their work on stage in front of me. How disrespectful. Do you think we can get, do we think this woman,

do we think this now grown woman will call in and discuss the make out during, if she's listening right now, I need to hear what's happening to me and my girl, the me and my girl make out. Jim Dale, by the way, it was star Jim Dale. One of your favorites. Now I'm curious.

Yeah, of course, there you go. I remember everything about it. That's fascinating. I remember it all. But here's the thing, besides me making out to musicals. I'm so upset. I'm so upset. I will admit that I did take someone to Starlight Express

in hopes of making out with them afterwards. But that was like much older. I was probably 18 years old or something. Oh wow, how was Starlight Express in hopes of making out with them afterwards. But that was like much older. I was probably 18 years old or something. Oh, wow. How was Starlight? It was awful, Paul. It was a nightmare because it was both a musical and they were on, I'm sorry, roller blades.

That's hard pass, hard pass. What I love about musicals is that, yes, it does require us as an audience to kind of suspend a different type of disbelief and transcend. And I'm personally ready for that journey, but I've also done a lot of work, Jason. I've done some work on myself. Listen, you're brave.

June, you're brave. Here's, there's things I'm not willing to go in. There's things I'm not willing to open myself to. And one of them is shockingly basic, sung story points, you know, like that does not it doesn't do anything for me. You know, I just watched Lin-Manuel Miranda explain on Rishikesh Heroways show, Song Exploder on Netflix, all about the creation of one of the songs in Hamilton and it's electric to watch.

If you let Rishikesh Hirway interview Andrew Lloyd Webber about any of these songs, you'd be like, I don't know, I just wrote a bunch of words and then we repeated them over and over and over. And F-able, I mean, yeah, I mean, Jellicle. Jellicle, Jellicle, Jellicle, Jellicle, Jellicle. Like that's it. Well, let's even go past the songs and past the music

and just say like, can we agree on what the world is? Right? Because if there are humans, we are in the middle of a London town where there are giant billboards from a cavity. I don't think London. I call it London town. I call it London town.

I call it London town. I don't think it's a subset of some town of London. I think it's just London. UK audience that's watching right now, it's London town, right? So all in London town. But there is a marquee of Macavity. And I was like, is he running for mayor?

But is he, or is he just running to be a Jellicle? Take a look at this marquee. And by the way, if it's, I mean, how do the cats afford this? Here's my next question. Why is he magic? Why is there magic? What are the rules? Well, that's David, that's my next question. Why is he magic? Why is there magic? What are the rules?

Why is he? Well, that's the Miss Cavage cat, or the David McCavage cat. Where is Shelly McCavage? Where is Shelly? Where is she? Oh wait, yeah, pull up that one. Any updates, by the way, any updates on her.

Where is Shelly McCavity? She's here watching the show. She's a big fan. And she was like, get me, get me in. I don't even wanna joke about it because she is in the hole. Okay. All right, well, look, so McCavity, there's a wanted scientist, wanted for everything.

So this is a world where McCavity, there's no humans in this world. Because if a human saw that, they'd be like, wait, we want a cat and why does the cat look like a, like, I don't understand the world. I don't understand why there's- There are definitely humans because the first character we see in the movie is a human being who steps out of a car wait, we want a cat and why does the cat look like a, like I don't understand the world. I don't understand why there's- There are definitely humans

because the first character we see in the movie is a human being who steps out of a car and throws the Victoria cat who's in a pillowcase into the trash, right? And so that person, human being, is throwing away the cat. So we can presume that there are humans, right? Right. You know, like that we know. So we don't really see them again. So that's fine.

But we understand that these cats all live inside of a human world because everything is put to scale. Now, my question though is, why is there magic? Why? It's okay. Okay. You want to tell me this is what happens when cats are alone. Like this is like Toy Story is the story of toys when the humans aren't around? Okay, this is the story of cats when humans aren't around. Great, why is there magic? Why can he disappear? Why can he disappear people to a boat?

Why? Well, I mean, I do think cats have been imbued with, whether they are magical or are not magical, that's not for me to decide. It's not, it's not for me. It's just, it's not, but. I mean, without a doubt, that's the t-shirt. It's not, no.

It's just, that is the t-shirt. It's already been decided. We will have this t-shirt up by the end of this show. I do feel like there's a long history. I remember distinctly a story my mom and dad told me about when my oldest sister was born, they lived in Manhattan in an apartment on the Upper West Side. And they had a window in their apartment, it's just a one bedroom to the courtyard. And my oldest sister, Deanna, was very young. She must've been about two or three months old.

And there was a cat that would come to the window. And my mom was terrified of the cat, like essentially stealing the baby's soul. Yeah. That's like a, that's a thing, right? But that's what I'm saying. There is a lot of lore and mystical attributes when it comes to cats.

Whether that's true or not. I don't mind that. I don't mind that. And in fact, there is some, some attention paid to that by the fact that like the theater is the Egyptian and there is the cat God perched above that theater. And I think they're trying to make a couple of those things, but it's not backed up by the movie. The movie does nothing to establish the rules of the magic that Idris Elba's character is participating in. And everybody

seems shocked that he's able to do it. You know? That plus the fact that apparently, Dame Judi Dench, like a literal national treasure, can essentially grant a cat to be reincarnated into a different life. Like that bit of magic too, I also couldn't quite wrap my head around. Like the goal of this appears to be to sing so good, you get to ride the chandelier into the sky? Here's my two points on this movie.

One, I think that Andrew Lloyd- That's this movie, man. I think that Andrew Lloyd Webber is, he's seeing into the future. This is a post-COVID world where cats have taken over. That's A. Or B, B, this movie should have been titled Birds. Because I feel like this is a much more of a bird movie

because I don't see cats flocking together like this. At one point the cats- Cats turn on each other. And they all like are on a statue at one point. There's a picture of like most of the cats, we have that like, the pictures are like, the cats are hanging off a statue. The cats don't like climb up architecture like that.

Well they do when they've been choreographed to. You have to remember that these cats have been choreographed right at Cat University to within an inch of their life in order to, upon seeing fountains, statues, garbage cans, trash barrels, dumpsters to choreograph themselves in a non-dynamic way to interact with these items. I could talk for, I'm gonna say, one hour with uninterrupted simply about the James Corden musical number.

Okay. I have an issue. I like James Corden a lot. I feel like they were like, this movie is not really working. Let's cut to him to kind of undercut the movie because he really just calls out like, this ain't working. And I know it. I, it is, he is working. And I also like James Corden. He is working so hard.

Him and Rebel Wilson are like, let's do it. They're working so hard. And it is, the movie is doing them no favors. The movie is actively mocking them as it goes. The James Corden stuff, I don't, he arrives dressed like Mr. Monopoly. No, that's not James Corden, that's Mr. Mastoff, please. I love him.

It's fine, but again, more magic. Why? Why is he able to conjure? Okay, I know, but that's one song that I did enjoy. His song? Yes. Okay, sure. I didn't, but I understand.

Cause at least I understood the goal of the song, which was to give him the confidence to bring back old Deuteronomy, right? Great, fine. By the way, why is her name Deuteronomy and everybody else is like, bingle bangles, jingle bangles. Like, and like, and that one is like,

that one is a Bible, that is a Bible name. Rumble teaser, Mongo Jerry, like what the fuck? What is, okay. So James Corden shows up dressed like he's in a different movie. All the cats are nude and he's wearing all the clothes, right? Well, some of the cats have no clothes on but just sneakers. Some of the cats have no clothes on but a fur coat?

Is that the pelt of a dead cat? Well, I mean, think about that. Think about how many characters are wearing fur in this. By the way, this brings me to my Gremlins 2 dilemma. Are these trophies? This is my Gremlins 2 dilemma. Who is making the cat clothes? Because it doesn't feel like it's oversized.

It fits the cats. So someone, there is a clothing maker for cats. There is a cat tailor. There's gotta be, we never go there, but there's gotta be some sort of cat equivalent of- Yeah, go ahead. Yeah, I'm sorry. This is what's weird.

And I know I'm circling the screen and no one can see this, but there are certain cats here that look like they do have like the outline of breasts or pets or whatever, for sure, for sure. You know, but then there are certain cats who don't. And there was also in this frame, cats who are 100% hind leg walkers and also cats that are 100% all fours. All fours, yeah. Which seems to me to be indiscriminate, basically.

If you wanna be on all fours, great. If you wanna be up on your hind legs, that's okay too. I mean, listen, I don't ever wanna see a cat just up on its hind legs. Just walking around. Walking around. I don't ever wanna see that. Here I am, if I had a cat and I was like,

here's my cat. And no. Boop, boop, boop, boop, boop. No, thank you. I'd be like, get this demon out of my house. Can we talk about the cat orgy? I won't even play the sound that loud. I just wanna look at it with you guys.

This is the cat orgy right here. This is play the sound that loud. I just want to look at it with you guys. This is the cat orgy right here. This is in the most sexual scene where all the cats are. They're all high on Taylor Swift's catnip, I think, at this point, right? Which, oh. No, I don't think this is that. Oh, OK, but when they're t- This is when they are summoning the, I think,

next angelical cat. This is when they've just entered the theater and they've all fallen into this syncopated thing. She's just learning it, Victoria. And so, but this is like the most sexual... What is this? This is the most sexual... Look how basic this is.

This is, this is, cheer was better than this. Ha ha ha. See, and they really seem like they're getting off on this moment. I feel like this is... I mean, are cats even sexual? I don't know. See, and they really seem like they're getting off on this moment. I feel like this is, I mean, are cats even sexual? I don't know. Well, I mean, what are you talking?

Wait, wait, wait, that's a wild question. Are cats even sexual? Yes. I don't know. The answer is just, the answer is a course they are. Well, look, I think dogs are giving... I think what you're saying though is like, yeah, you see dogs humping, like, whatever.

You see, you know, rabbits are known as sexual creatures. Cats are known as being dist... I've never seen cats have sex with each other, but... Cats can be, but can't cats be, like, in heat? Isn't that the thing about cats? I know dogs can. I don't know that about... I don't know that about cats. I'm pretty sure cats get horny.

No, no, no, because the stork brings the kittens, right? That's the whole idea. The stork brings the kittens. Oh, Paul. Uh-huh. OK. Right, yeah. The magical.

We're going to have to really unpack this. There's like a little magical flank. It's really weird because I actually, this is, listen, again, I know I want to mind my P's and Q's, but I was surprised. I think of cats as female, for whatever reason. And I don't know if anyone else like- And you think of dogs as male?

Yeah. I think, you know what, I think I genderized them as well. That really, yeah, okay, interesting. Yeah. When it comes to animals, I don't see gender. They're all just animals. Really? That's wonderful.

I don't know why I do that. I don't think I just know it. I keep watching the movie. It more is dismissive of animals than anything else. I don't see them as having souls. I just don't. I don't. I was surprised to see male cats. Like I actually, as I was watching this,

had the thought like, are there male cats? Of course there are. But I so think of cats as demure and editorial in their choices. And they seem so much more feminine to me. Yeah. Cats have given me some of the best notes on scripts, I will say, in an editorial sense. They're very good.

Well, I mean, one of the cats cut jaws. They say yes, they say no, they decipher. Really smart cats. I mean, one of the cats cut jaws. They say no, they decipher. Really smart cat. I mean, there's so much going on here. I think it's smart if we maybe go to the audience a little bit to kind of look at what they're saying, because I think it will cover some of the things that we have. People have typed in their questions.

The thing I wanted to say, just very briefly, when we showed the picture of James Corden is, when we see James Corden first, here's what happens. Can you pull up the James Corden image again, if possible? When we see James Corden first, here's what happens. Can you pull up the James Corden image again if possible? When we see James Corden first, he's wearing this top hat, a waistcoat, he's wearing all of this stuff, right? Then he leads them through a door and then they all help him take his clothes off, which forces me, the viewer, to now think I'm looking at a naked James Corden.

I felt that too. You've put that this movie put that into my mind and I don't know. Not only that, but like everybody else is naked too. Yes. Like now I'm uncomfortable with what I'm seeing here. Yeah. The boat, the, when the cat shows up in clothes, it just forces me to think everybody here is naked.

Here's a little moment. It's also weird when she unzips. One bit. I don't look. Okay. Now I want to pay close attention to the cake. This is also weird. When she unzips. I don't like this one bit. I don't like this one bit. Okay, now I want to pay close attention to the cake. That's scale. Like that's the tea cozy and the cake.

Scale is wrong though. Well, whoever did scale did not understand it. They didn't because if that's a slice of cake, Jason, that slice of cake would be this big. I believe it is. Which would mean a cat would be enormous next to it. But it's the size of her legs. Like, it's the height of her, almost to her waist.

I feel like they interviewed somebody. It's not. That's my problem. It's just to her calf. Yes, it's too big. And I believe what they did. But it's in the background. I believe what they did is I think they hired, I feel like they hired like someone who got fired

from Lord of the Rings. Like, oh wow, you know how to do. I need a scale key. Yeah, you know how to do scale, right? And like, yeah, yeah, yeah. And then got fired like the first week into Lord of the Rings. I need this movie in the bottom right hand corner to always have a key.

So I understand in this scene, the cat is this big compared to a piece of cake. In this scene, compared to a piece of cake, a cat is this big. We can break it down. I mean, we should be breaking it down. Somebody should break it down because it is a wild, it's wildly bizarre to watch these cats in some scenes

feel like they are the size of human beings. They hold the space of human beings and they seem to engage with each other the way human beings do. and then have them dance around in sets that make them appear to be teeny tiny house cats. Well, now I'm actually wondering like, what did you say? That's a tea cozy?

What is that? That's what I assumed. It's with a cake, it's a knit thing. I assumed it was a tea cozy, but I don't know, Frank. Does a tea cozy go around a teapot or do you go? OK, can you go back to that picture for a second? This picture is the Rosetta Stone for this movie. All right, here we go.

Please can we go back to the picture, please? OK, so wait a second. That's a teapot. I don't know that because I think the spout is right there in the front. If you can see right here. Oh. And it's a nip. Oh my God, this is so wrong.

Wow. Right? So that was teapot. I'm pointing it. You can't see what I'm pointing at. But I believe this is like, cause I think she's standing in front of a teacup and saucer. This is actually more upsetting

the more I'm staring at it. Because first of all, she just, I mean, by the way, I think the reason why we're not noticing is cause she just ripped off her cat skin to reveal her identical cat skin with like a more flashy outfit on. And I gotta say, I'm looking at the size of the light switch behind her too. And I feel like that, yeah, that's wrong too.

Okay, okay, so here's- Because if she was standing here, she was sitting here on this live stream, if she was sitting here, that teapot, a teapot in a cozy would come up to her calves. And we haven't even spoken to the true insanity, which is if you look at her feet, she has just, previously she was not wearing any of this.

She was just fur covered in fur, which she unzips to reveal this. But what we see on the ground is her initial fur is lined with the purple material that her outfit is made out of. So she's wearing this around the house. So she's wearing a fake fur outfit that has a material lining so that she can take it off

to reveal this outfit on top of her real fur, right? Wait, wait a second, hold on. What are those things? Are those hands that came out of what are those things? I know you can't see what I'm pointing to. I believe those to be her hands. Yeah. Those are the hands of the first suit that she took off. No, she has hand. First of all, I want this. I want this.

And by the way, June, I feel like if this was a sweatsuit made by Claire Vivier, you would wear this like cat sweatsuit. Like if there's a way that we can make these and sell them on T public, let's please do it. How did this get made? All needs to dress up as cats. By the way here, I want to do another perspective thing. Here's the cats on the statue

because this is another way of mind warping how big the statue is. Can we pull up that picture real quick of the cat? Okay. This is not helpful. All right, so this is another version. So this is a giant, in London town, this is a giant- It's just London.

In London town, good old London town. There is Prime Minister Alan Partridge. There is a... There... But, all right, so I don't understand, but the way they are in front of this statue, this statue is like, I don't even know how to describe it. Which is, by the way, a cat.

They're in front of a cat-based statue. Yeah. Molly, can you find out how big this cat is in real life? Molly, our super producer back there. Stay on this picture for a second though, because I am, and listen, all bodies are beautiful, but it must have been, in some ways, I think if I had been in this movie,

I wasn't asked, obviously. I wasn't even since- Oh, they begged me. They begged me. Oh, nobody asked me to submit a tape or sing a song. I was supposed to be the guy who threw the cat. But I said, I was like, I want to put the real human being in a bag and throw that.

And they're like, no, no, no. We're going to have a different perspective. I said, no, no. Put a human being in the bag, and then I'll toss it. And then there was a disagreement. But here's the thing. It must have been freeing, in a way, to work on this movie. Because it's like, if I were there,

I'd just be eating up a storm because even when you're looking your best, like even when you're keeping it right and tight, you still, your body will look like shit. Like nobody, these costumes are so unforgiving. It's, it is, it is awful to look at, which is why I think some people, which is why I think some of them were like, you gotta give me a coat. You gotta give me a coat. Oh, I would demand it. I am talking, now we got some real stats on this cat.

This cat, the statue in London is 20 feet long and 22 feet high. So now one of these characters is standing and is almost halfway to its beard. So that cat is at least 10 feet tall. No, you are wrong, because look at where the camera is. The camera is low and the person is close. The perspective is wrong, right?

Oh no, I'm looking at the person behind that person. But Jason, even if you look up top at the cats that are sitting on top of a lion's head. They're so small up there. They're not that small. But look, if you take your fingers to them and you measure, like this right here, that's one cat. That's the size of one cat, not even standing up.

So this is the size of one cat standing up. All right, so this is the land- 22 feet high, June, and we're on the ground. This is the land-seer lion. We're on the ground looking up 22 feet. This is the land-seer lion in Trafalgar Square. So this is a 22 feet high statue. We're trying to figure it out

because we have to often remember. So the camera is the ground. We're looking up 22 feet, which is basically two stories. So those little cats up there, compared to train tap dancing cat, why pants and no shirt? Everybody else agrees we're wearing tops. Why suspenders? We're wearing tops and no pants.

That's everybody's- Here's the thing. According to this scale that I'm looking at right now, and I am taking into consideration that the camera's on an angle and I'm looking up, but according to this scale, from what I'm seeing and what I can lay out and the legend I can make in my mind, these cats are minimum, minimum five feet tall.

No, no. are minimum, minimum, five feet tall. No, no. I told you that. June, I agree with you. I'm on June's side. These cats. What do people say in the chat? This movie would have you believe that these cats are the size of ordinary house cats, period.

That's what this movie is positing. I agree that it's positing that, but based on the actual scale of this, this figure, the movie is unsuccessful on every level, including scale. But that's what they're trying to do. But I agree. It is unsuccessful. Yes.

Oh, I'm not ever going to argue that this movie is successful on any level. Hard stop. Like this is an unmitigated failure from start to finish, and it is wild to watch. We are getting some responses in from the audience here, and we're going to start going to their questions as well. But I want to see what they think about the size. How tall do you think a cat in this movie is?

How tall do you think a cat is? I think at least five feet. Let me just say, I think one of the thrilling things about the, I think one of the thrilling things about the live show from what I remember of those, um, the Regis commercials. Yeah. And by the way, Oh, look at this. Put that a little bit closer, June.

This is a picture of June with Regis. Whoa. Wow. How is that available? So it's really weird that this is out. I just found it in this notebook that I was holding with my notes. Very weird. It is. It's a long story about why I tried to dig this up and it was in this notebook. But Regis had a book out. This is, I mean, if you lived on Long Island, Paul and I both grew up on Long Island.

You loved Regis. I worked out with Regis' trainer. I worked out up on Moniland. You loved Regis. I mean, we loved him. I worked out with Regis' trainer. I worked out with Regis'- He was the fucking best. This man was the best. The best. And when I was in eighth grade,

I went, he was at the mall and I went to see him and get an autograph. I don't know why I had both hands on his shoulders. Is he wearing a Hawaiian shirt? Can I ask you, June, was he trying to get away? He does not look happy. Was he trying to get away? He does not look happy. Was he trying to get away? You're gonna sit right here.

You're gonna stay right here. There is literally a security- He was at the National Shield Mall and I went to go see him and he was lovely. There is literally a security guard behind June right there. All right, so the chat is chiming in here. They're saying, the cats in the lion's head are as large as his head.

My name is Jamie is saying the cat on the head should be cats in the lion's head are as large as his head. My name is Jamie is saying the cat on the head should be smaller than the lion's head. Snug says I have climbed those lions and the perspective is totally bleep bleep bleep here. This is a five foot tall cat. That's a WTF says I agree with June. Geostorm, Geostorm. Thurman says as a veterinarian, these cats are not to scale. That's a vet. Of course they're not. Wow, okay. Now listen, here's what I was gonna say though,

from the commercials Paul and I saw growing up, part of the thrill of being in that audience of cats was that, from what I remember, Paul, in the commercials on Regis, the cats came into the audience. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, for sure. It was very much like- The cats came up to you and went down the aisle. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, for sure. It was very much like. The cats came up to you and like went down the aisle

and like came at you and that was really, and like snuggled up on you. Oh, I would love that. I would love to pet a cat. Like a human cat. Oh my god, me too. And I think that's what was exciting. If a cat touched me,

I think I'd throw myself off the balcony. I would be like, that's it. I wanna make, I wanna start a Kickstarter tostarted to bring you to a cat's live. Once the theater comes back, the first thing that you're going to do is see cats live. One on one. Cats has been closed for a few years now. No, but I'm sure it's traveling around the country.

The idea of the cats was for many years, one of the longest though, was in fact the longest running Broadway show in history is to me mind scrambling because my assumption is this is a faithful adaptation of the songs contained within the play. So if I were to cheat this... Yes, with one additional one. Okay. There is an additional song not in my Andrew Lloyd Webber?

Yes, he wrote a new song for the actual movie. I will tell you, it's a little bit in my research here. This is not my cheating, but this is a... Like it really was, when I realized that each song was just another cat's introduction, and then those cats would then basically leave, you know? That each thing was a lateral move, not forwarding the plot at all. And Victoria is Cynthia Erevo, right?

Yes. That for her, she is just like everywhere she looks, someone's pulling her in a different direction. I couldn't tell what did she want? Like what did anybody want? By the way. Other than to win the ball and become something else. Well, here's what I think.

I think that why I'm calling her Jennifer Lawrence, Jennifer Hudson, Jennifer Hudson, I think is a sex worker cat, right? And I feel like McCavity is kind of abusing her. And that's how I kind of viewed her. And so it's sort of like Judy Dench saw her, and it's like, you deserve to have a new fresh start because you have been forced into this sex work

against your will. And now I'm gonna give you a fresh life. You can live in a house like Rebel Wilson lives in and you can teach the mice to have a band. Like I felt like that's what I was getting. So where does she go at the end? She goes in that balloon to a new world or maybe to heaven.

Does she die? Cats too? Is this about nine lives? Is this about cats having nine lives? Oh, people say she dies. Oh, wow. I thought too that she dies. So it's like, that's the great relief.

The great relief is they have nine lives. Like, oh wow, they go to cat heaven. Yeah, but to come back eventually, I think. I'm sorry. So that they all compete in a contest once a year and the best one gets to die? Listen, 2020. I get it. If I was living in this cat world,

I'd be like, get me out of here. Get, get, get, get, get. I'm ready to go. What do I got to do? Put me in that chandelier and send me up. Let's get to the questions here from the crowd because we have a lot of great questions lined up here. We're gonna pop them on the screen.

Steve Sheppy asks, what kind of fur are the cats fur coats made out of? This is interesting because the cat fur that I already said it, I think that's gotta be dead cats. So here's my question. What, what part of their costumes do you think is CGI? Obviously they're taking out genitalia, but sometimes I thought they weren't because there are times where the male cats are just sort of in shadows down there.

Well I'm guessing my you know just like in my kind of if I'm thinking practically to in terms of making this movie my guess is everybody is wearing like a green screen jumpsuit. No I think they're wearing is CG. I think they're wearing actually a little bit of cat fur. By the way, look at this. I mean, because you think it's all fake? I think head-wise, I think their makeup is done, but I think everything below the neck is CG.

I was on the set of a very big Marvel film, and I met Robert Downey Jr. for the second time in my life. And his Iron Man- Can you produce a picture? No. You wanna tell the story about the first time? No, I don't, no, cause I feel like no. But when I saw what his Iron Man costume was,

I was shocked. The man is in essentially like a beautifully comfortable black outfit with like one little like giant necklace that looks like the Iron Man shield in front. Like there's no costume on him. So maybe you're right, Jason, maybe there is. I think because my thinking is, and this is why, I think that it would have been different.

I think they purposefully designed these cats to not have genitalia, you know, and the butthole cut is a whole thing and we can talk about that. But I think, I think in all likelihood and maybe I'll be proven wrong and maybe the boards are going bananas right now, but my, I suspect they did makeup on their faces

and otherwise everything else is green screen. Everything else is green screen. Everything else is. Okay, if that's the case, if that's the case, then this photo, then if I were this cat, the white cat, Victoria, I would find the CGI person. Right.

And shoot them. Because they did her so dirty, they made everybody's body look like human bodies... I agree. ...in unflattering... Sexless. Sexless. Just... Sexless human body. Just so you understand, apparently,

this article in The Daily Beast that came out in 2020, it took six months to produce the two-minute trailer, and then they were only given four months to make the entire film. So the special effects took six months for the trailer and only four to do the two minutes versus, like, almost two hours, yeah. They were spending 90...

And a lot happened before that too. ...90-hour work weeks, 90-hour work weeks, sleeping under their desks to get the film done. So much so, and I think we've heard this... Because they rushed it to Christmas? Didn't you remember Christmas? Yeah, they rushed it to Christmas and they left things in, like Judy Dench

has a wedding ring in at one scene. And then they had to switch it out. She doesn't have a paw, she has a regular hand. Ian McKellen is wearing Gandalf's hat in one scene. They basically, they were trying to get it out so quickly and then they sent other, they sent updated cuts to movie theaters basically like, they were trying to get it out so quickly and then they sent like other, like they sent updated cuts to movie theaters being like, replace it, replace it with this one.

It's crazy. Oh, I'm remembering this. You know, like all the, cause to me all the tails are digital. I don't think they're wearing much of anything, frankly. I mean, maybe, maybe in moments they are, but I really think, I suspect everything is fucking nonsense. I mean, listen, it's interesting to see

what happens to a face, like a human face, when you lose ears. You know, I didn't know they were as, I didn't know they were as important. I thought the tails were disgusting. The tails felt like dicks to me, and it made me gross every single time. Not just ears, but also eyebrows.

To take eyebrows away from eyes makes them very difficult to read meaning into expressions. And what I would say is throughout this movie, with the exception again of Jennifer Hudson, there is no emotionality in any of the cats because they've taken away all of our expressive elements, our foreheads, our eyebrows, all of the things surrounding our eyes to clue us into what people are thinking

or feeling. By the way, what we're left with is these smoothed out weird cat faces and lyrics that are emotionally zero. They're nothing. Well, let's take a look at what some pre CGI cats look like. Here we go. This is pre-CGI.

Oh, wow, you're right. So they were wearing no fur at all. They're just in green screen suits. Ian McKellen is wearing- What did I tell you? Yes. Wow. Ian McKellen is wearing his jacket, of course,

but yeah, they have nothing. Wow. I'm now kind of impressed. Yeah, they're in big fat suits and all that sort of stuff, but no, they're- Yeah, exactly. Exactly. Wow, wow, wow.

Andrew Lloyd Webber with his Starbucks. Come on, look at that. That's what they had to wear. That's, if someone said, hey, come be in my movie, this is what you have to wear. Immediate hard pass. Just kidding, please put me in a movie with one of those. But I mean.

Look at this. What? I mean, you know what? And I'm gonna say this is why they all did this really well because they didn't know what it was gonna look like and they felt like, oh, it's gonna look great. And I'm going to say this is why they all did this really well, because they didn't know what it was going to look like. And they felt like, oh, it's going to look great. And I think this is how you get people done dirty because you go like, oh, it will look

great afterwards. And it doesn't and they and it looks almost more silly. Oh, look, you know that if you were on this set, you would be like, oh, no. What what is going to happen? Maybe, maybe not. I mean, it's okay. I just can I pause for one second? Yeah. but what is gonna happen? I don't know, maybe, maybe not. I mean, it's- Okay, can I pause for one second?

Yeah. She's standing in front of bar stools. That's the scale. Oh, you're right, because her head is touching the top of the bar stool. But even at that point- That's still way too big for a cat. If a cat was head was touching the top of a bar stool,

that's like a- On its hind legs, on its hind legs. If a cat was on its hind legs standing up and- If a cat was to stand all the way up, I think a cat would be- You're probably right. Almost to the top of the- You were wrong, you were right.

I don't think it's right. I'm not saying it's exact, but that's what they're trying to tell us. You know, that that's a cat on its hind feet and that's a bar stool. I mean, what's what's happening when we leave? When we leave this tonight, when we click leave meeting tonight, I'm going to be alone in my house as I have been for seven months

with only the the nightmarish visuals that I have been forced to consume for you. For you, 10,000 assholes out there, fuck you. Let's get to, let's get some more questions in here. Let's see what else we got here. This is a good one coming up. MittensMoyer asks boobs, why? Both my cats are female and they don't have boobs. Great question.

You're right, we did talk about this a little bit, but they kept the boobs and they took out the genitalia. Why would they give them boobs? What's weird is wouldn't they have six boobs? Wouldn't they have like a cat has like a bunch of nipples, right? So why aren't, why, why don't the cats, why don't, why doesn't Judi Dench have like six nipples going on? Why doesn't anybody have nipples?

Where are the, where are the nipples? Where are the nipples? Where are the nipples? Nevermind the butthole cut. Where's the nipple cut? But the problem with the nipples is because the cats are upright so much of the time, we would be staring at six nipples at multiple nipples. You'd be staring at nipples constantly.

Constantly, and they couldn't do that. I blame them for a lot. I don't blame them for that. It was, I mean, I know we touched on this at the beginning, but it was surprisingly gross. Like seeing those tails move independently of the cats, you know, seeing that the cats move this way and then the tails move that way. It was like, I don't like it. All right, next question. Next question. I didn't like any of the feline movement. I didn't like it.

Listen, here's an example, right? I know I've said- Are you a cat person, Jason? I'm not. I'm more of a dog person than a cat person. I don't, I don't, if somebody has a cat, I don't mind it. You know what I mean? But I'm, I'm, I'm not a cat person. I'm not an animal person,'t, if somebody has a cat, I don't mind it. You know what I mean? But I'm not a cat person.

I'm not an animal person, if I'm being honest. Wait, I thought you liked dogs. I do, I love dogs. Yeah, I thought you were a dog person. Yeah, look at this. Okay, so you're a dog person. This is great. Look at this, this is gonna be a great dog.

Here's my dead dog. Here's my dead dog, Turkey the dog. Aw, Turkey. Yeah, so cute. What a beautiful baby. But I will say, I will say that like, I can wrap my head around and fully enjoy, I know I said I don't like musicals,

I can fully enjoy singing in the rain, right? What an incredible, beautiful movie. What a beautiful, incredible movie. What, like something where the song and dance really enhances the movie and enhances the story and helps tell, helps illustrate character, all this stuff. Great, love it.

Okay, this, these cats dancing around is not exceptional dancing. It's not interesting movement. The feline movements are jarring and uncomfortable to watch human beings writhe around on the ground. It looks, June, like what you're doing, which is it looks like an acting exercise. It is an acting exercise.

It looks like actors trying to be cats. This is clown class. Next question. Katie asks for Jason, in your expert opinion, which cat was the sexiest? This is a good question here. Oh, without a doubt, Dame Judi Dench, period. Okay, yeah, you know, I actually-

I actually thought Mr. Mistoff, what's his name again? Mistoffelies, yeah. Yeah,, I actually. I actually thought Mr. Mistoff, what's his name again? Mistoffelis, yeah. Yeah. Mr. Mistoffelis. Mr. Mistoffelis. I thought he was a pretty sexy cat. Really? I thought he was the one that's the least sexy, because he's wearing all that magician outfits.

All right, interesting. I thought, I thought, I know, I mean, I thought like, I didn't think, here's the reality, I didn't think any of them were really that sexy. I think the movie, the movie, I think many of the actors in this movie are sexy people. I think Jason Derulo that sexy. I think the movie, I think many of the actors in this movie are sexy people. I think Jason Derulo is sexy.

I think Cynthia Rivo is sexy. I think Taylor Swift is. I think these are sexy people. But this movie doesn't help them at all. I think Jennifer Hudson. I mean, I don't think these are unsexy people. You know what I mean? I'm just saying.

The movie is- Listen, I think the male cats are sexier than the female cats. I agree, their bodies work better for it, yes. Is that, yes, their bodies, their shapes work better as cats and they just translate better into cats. I don't disagree, I don't disagree. But so none of them, the answer is none of them really landed as sexy.

I want to end our audience question part with an observation that Dirty Flamingo made I don't disagree. But so none of them, the answer is none of them really landed as sexy. I want to end our audience question part with an observation that Dirty Flamingo made. Can we pull up this thing? Not a question, but an observation. The suits are green and the screens behind them are green. That would be impossible to key. The CGI team must have remade their whole bodies from,

I think from scratch is what they wrote. But yeah, if you look at that, that is, that point is so smart. They're in green screen on green screen. Oh boy, this movie was doomed to begin with. This movie is, this gotta be. I mean, it looks like they're having a hell of a time. I really want there to be a documentary

about what a nightmare it was to make this movie. Yes, oh. Because it must have been. But by the way, we've been, look, I think that we've been unfairly kind of like ragging on this movie. Yes. Because it must have been. Um, but by the way, we've been, look, I think we've been unfairly kind of like ragging on this movie and I don't know if we actually know like what the true intent will ever be, but it is now time for a second opinion and we have now gone to you, our amazing audience, to sing some second opinion songs. So without any further ado, enjoy you introducing this segment. I don't trust Tom Hooper, Taylor Swift, oh, can't you see? You're the actress starring in my bad dream.

Second opinion, some of them are out of hand. You're a genius or a roller coaster made of rubber bands. Oh, this movie isn't good Memory, want to erase all my memories Of this terrible movie It was truly so wrong But if you click on over to Amazon, you'll find a second opinion.

All right. Those are some amazing second opinion songs. And by the way, brief, we never get that when we do the show live. These are five star reviews, coldfromamazon.com. Oh, that from amazon.com. There are 6,984 reviews of this film. And this has about a 3.3 out of five stars. There are 40% of them are five-star reviews.

But while some of them are cheeky, they still express some very genuine love for the movie. So, and by the way, this is from Nate, Nate Kylie, one of our great researchers, friend of the show, worker of the show. We love Nate. He says, look, Paul, there are some furries reviewing this movie. So here we go. I can see that.

Yeah. So yeah, let's see here. All right. This is from Daniel B. Lyle. Despite its PG rating, there's a lot of T and E in this movie. Tails and ears. An additional major character

throughout the magical journey is the T and E. The tails move along like the amazing dancing and cat-like while marvelous ears twitch and shift and they're totally cat-like, while marvelous ears twitch and shift and they're totally lifelike. I liked it, I'm watching it, many times over five stars. So this review was titled, Delightfully Magical T&E. This one from Michael, this one is,

the journey is the reward. At its core, it's a wistful story of the naivete of youth, the melancholy of aging and the self-imposed damnation of regret, the blessing of friendship and the nobility of sacrifice, because in the end, All we're left with is our memories. Five stars. The movie is the show. Wow. That's pretty deep.

Yeah. Pretty deep. Uh, and then this is a very long review, that's pretty deep. Yeah, pretty deep. And then this is a very long review, which I'm gonna kinda compact down from Sinzbin Po. Sinzbin Po writes this. Tom Hooper and the entire cast and crew of Cats should be very, very proud of what they have achieved. I wish Growl Tiger's last stand,

including the ballot of Billy McCaw, would have been more thoroughly included, albeit in a reworked manner to remove its offensive elements. But as it is, I don't know what the offensive elements of Growl Tigers last stand or the ballot of Billy McCaw is. I am thrilled with my purchase. An ardent fan of this film. I'll be watching it over and over again. One element about Cats I feel is important for viewers to know, yet is not really stressed enough

in my honest opinion. Do you have young grandchildren that you don't get to visit quite enough? Do you have nieces and nephews that are growing up quicker than expected and you find yourself wondering, will they think kindly of you in the future since you don't have the time to spend with them?

Well, how could you handle this? Well, T.S. Eliot created the character situations and poems for his cats for this very reason. He was a grandfather who wasn't able to see his grandchildren often enough to suit himself and he created this elaborate world as a bonding mechanism, which they could all enjoy each other's company from afar. Imagine the joy they must've felt, the anticipation for each subsequent-

Are they cats in this scenario? Imagine the horror, imagine the horror they felt when their grandfather sent them these stories. Imagine what nightmares they must have produced. It goes, the anticipation for each subsequent letter as the story unfurled itself and each character was born,

I for one think it's a beautiful gesture. T.S. Eliot, despite his faults, The anticipation for each subsequent letter as the story unfurled itself and each character was born. I for one think it's a beautiful gesture. T.S. Eliot, despite his faults, must have been an amazing grand space father. That is a five star review right there, wow. If I had grandkids, without a doubt, I would rather read to them from Stephen King's It than show them this movie.

I am not... I am not... Yeah, this is haunting. This would fuck me up if I saw this at a young age. Oh God, yes. This would really fuck me up. I mean, I wanna read the letters now. I guess I'm gonna have to get that book

and read it to our children, June, so don't say I can't. Mrs. G writes this, and I think this is kind of a slam... Mrs. G from... From Facts of Life? From the Facts of Life. You take the good, you take the bad, you take them both... There you have it. You can sing. You can sing.

That's talk singing. That's not real singing. Mrs. G. The title of this is called Enjoyable Entertainment, which is kind of the most base thing you could say about entertainment. Says Idris Elba as McCavity could have stolen the show, but he didn't. He held back and fit in perfectly well with the rest of the cast. No one was overshadowed.

Anyone else in the storyline altered a little to make the movie easier to understand. Five stars. Easier to understand? And also, like you're saying like, I love the idea that- Strong disagree. And finally, I'll just end on this last one from Casey,

which is a, I just, I'm not gonna read the whole review. Casey Wilson, I wish. Our friend Casey Wilson? It just says this, one must approach this movie- She's writing five star reviews under her own name. She's written a lot of them. I mean, look, she says, she was one must approach approach this movie with an open mind.

Think of it as like Casey. Think of it as looking at a Jackson Pollock. It's messy. It's horrible. It's intense, but boldly confident. And then it's described. This does sound like Casey. And I actually agree with her. This movie takes a swing and maybe it's unfinished. Like maybe they needed more time, but it does take

a swing and that's the thing that I did appreciate about it. I agree. That it took a bold swing. I'm all in for bold swings. That's why I enjoyed this movie and Casey just said this one thing that I've never heard. I'm going to this as something I'm gonna say a lot. It was like being on a roller coaster made of rubber bands. And that to me really feels like five stars. That feels to me like the perfect description of this movie.

A roller coaster of rubber bands. Holy cow. Well, we really... I mean, we've dissected a lot of this film. And I think before we kind of wrap up with our final thoughts, there might be one person out there who has a couple of thoughts. And I would love to throw this over to this one person who has just wants to kind of engage us with this.

So, take a look. (*JASON LAUGHS*) Hi, Jason, Paul, and June. I miss you all very much. Sad! But this is as close as I'm, Jason, Paul and June. I miss you all very much. Sad. But this is as close as I'm getting you, it looks like. I'm going to talk about Cats for a moment with you. So I watched, I tweeted about as I was watching it and was quite frankly just shocked by.

It was a weird film. Sure. Yeah, there was a lot to process. I think the thing that was maybe the most consistently weird thing was the scale of the movie. The scale is weird. And I did research online and it told me that the sets were built to a 2.5 scale, which means that the cats would weigh around, that means the cat's like 60 pounds. And it's like two feet tall. Oh wow, I dropped out of high school and not good enough, but it's bigger than a fucking cat. And I don't know what a Jellicle is, that was insane.

Having not seen the Broadway musical, it was objectively crazy. And also like, I've always thought like Broadway musicals are not funny, but like when you go see them on Broadway, everyone's laughing. And I'm always thinking like, if this was a movie, no one would laugh at this. And this is a very good example of why that is a correct thought for me to have. The visual effects are weird. And the other thing I learned after tweeting it is that all these cats had buttholes. And it was very, very close to the release of the film that they got rid of the buttholes. So some way there is an entire cut of the

film with where all these cats have but cat butt holes. If you watch the movie through that lens it's again even fucking crazier. The pants logic is wildly inconsistent, the clothes logic is inconsistent, Judy Dent is wearing a fur coat at one point which is crazy. Because that'd be like wearing a human flesh coat in our world. Yes, agree Yeah, they all went to cat school. That's the other thing They went to cat school for like weeks fucking cats I would have quit this film if the director asked me to go to cat school

My god I've been enjoying the show. Thank you for getting me through these dark times. I love it. We had to get Seth in here. We had to get Seth in here to chat about it. Very best. And really, it's really bringing up a lot of the salient points that we have highlighted.

I mean, everyone... The fur coats, the scale, all of it. You know, like, none of it makes sense. The rules are. Wait, am I to understand from Seth's video? By the way, this is what the chat is saying right now. Seth's face, but I might understand. OK, team scale. So did he say when it's two and a half to scale.

So the cats are 60 pounds each. Yes. So I know like our dog meatball. I was going to say that like half your dog on screen, by the way. Yeah, we got our dog meatball. I was going to say that's like half your dog on screen, by the way. Yeah, we got our dog. Can you get him on screen? I mean, I don't want to mess it. But our dog meatball is, um, let me see if I can get a shot of him. Uh, well, it's going to be a little hard because I'm all like attached to wires, but our dog is 90 pounds. He's enormous. And to the point where people see him on the streets and stop, because they're stunned by what they're seeing.

I feel like a 60 pound cat would be like a panther. You know what I mean? I feel like that's a 60 pound cat. Yeah, that's a 90 pound dog that's on my lap in that photo. Like a cheetah or a panther, like a jungle cat, or you know what I mean? Like a wild cat is probably 60 pounds. Yeah, that's a, I mean a cat like that, I'm glad that Seth did the research

that we couldn't quite put together. That was really important. He seemed, I loved that there was like, he seemed haunted. He seemed haunted by the memory of having watched this movie. And I feel like he watched it a while ago and it seems so alive.

Oh yeah. A total recall. And it seems so alive for him. Yeah. Uh-oh. Because it probably- My zoom light just went out. I'm so sorry. I know I look like a monster now. You look beautiful.

Here we go. I know I just lost half the audience because my zoom, my ring light went out. Well, let me ask you this. Would we recommend this movie? Jason, would you recommend the film? No, do not watch this movie. Don't watch this movie.

Or if you really need to, like you, here's what I will say, you can fast forward. Yeah. You can fast forward because most of the songs are repetitive and the choreography is bad. The movie, you're not missing plot points because there aren't any. So if you want to see what's up because you're like,

I don't know, I want to see what this craziness is about, go ahead, but it is nearly two hours long. It should be no minutes long. It is unpleasant to watch. It is unsettling. It will haunt my dreams. I don't wanna be left alone in this house with my purchase of cats for fear

that it will turn itself on without me wanting it to be on. Like, I don't know what to do with this existence. We are in spooky season right now, Jason. I don't have the emotional capacity right now. I don't have the emotional capacity to have watched Cats. Really, this is a hard time.

Oh my gosh. All right, so June, would you recommend this movie? Oh. I actually would. And mainly because I'm so upset I look so much better without this fucking ring light on, Paul. I'm never letting you send that to me again. Well, I think that you understand how the ring lights work. I didn't know I was so much better without this fucking ring light on Paul. I never let you send that to me again. Well, I think that you understand how the ring lights work.

I didn't know. I was trying to help you out. It was way too bright. Do you want me to turn my lights off? No, everybody else looks great. I'm now seeing that I should have tested some lighting here before it sat down. I tried to do my best. And I'm going to do it. Thank you. So I would only for Jennifer Hudson's rendition of Memories,

because she really did something else and she did what she had to do. And I thought it was wonderful. Again, I listened to it three times and then sang it myself. So just for that number alone, I would watch it. I thought it was, I thought that was just great. Yeah, and I agree. I agree with you 100%. I think we all agree. Her performance is the only performance in the movie

that is even close to working, and it's wonderful. I will say this. We watch so many movies on this show, and very rarely do we find something that is so uniquely, like this goes into me the pantheon of the Miami connections, the rooms, and that because it's not as enjoyable as those, absolutely not, but it's as mind boggling.

I think you and I, June, looked at each other so many times like, what are we watching? Like, what are we watching? This is of, and unfortunately right now, we're in a time where we can't go see it publicly. I know the Alamo Drafthouse had these rowdy screenings that apparently are so much fun. That is how you should see this movie, with people.

You need to look and embrace it. I mean, there is something on screen that is worthy of stop getting your hold on yeah you got to get your eyeballs on I highly recommend it it's on HBO Max now by the time you're listening to this so why not enjoy a night a beverage of choice whatever you want to take a pill of choice or if you just want to watch it straight it's fine we watch it's real a pill take a pill. Give me give me that pill get that pill Give me that pill take that matrix pill. Well Jason and June. This has been so much fun doing our first virtual show

Thank you to our amazing audience I want to talk about a couple things before you kind of wrap it up But at first just want to thank our amazing team Behind the scenes everybody had on location live They really helped us so much get this thing together and convince us this is something that was great to do. But the team that is so close to my heart is the team that produces this show every single week.

And that is our amazing producer, Cody Fisher, just awesome, we love Cody. Our sound engineer, Devin, who's gonna have a hell of a time putting this together as always, but is a master. And Molly Reynolds, amazing, amazing job. A big shout out to Nate Kiley does all of our research, the ghost of Craig T. Nelson,

who does some of our amazing animations. And so Kyle Waldron does amazing animations as well. We have so many great people. I've already talked about Avril Haley and how great she is. But now I just wanna draw our attention to two quick things. Number one, there's a special episode of How Did This Get Made that is available right now.

You can only hear it by downloading it. All the money is going to when we all vote, you go to HDTGM.com. All the money is going there right now. It's a special episode where we do the Transformers films and we actually talk to the people who terrorized us by sending us over a hundred copies of that film in the last two years. Anything else that you all want to plug? I'm wearing a hat. This is vote.

And if you're in the States, here's I'll say that. Yeah, here's what I'm going to say. Having now just watched Cats, our friend from comedy, Brett Gelman, did a stage show for a long time called 1000 Kits. Oh, yes. Of course. That I believe exists online because he shot it for Funny or Die.

Oh my God. So I think there is somewhere like a 20 minute cut. Yes. A bit cut together. And it is Brett Gelman doing... And it's brilliant. It is brilliant. And he is basically what this...

Which I didn't realize it's a savage commentary on this because yes him I'm saying do you see it's a one-man show where he introduces? 1000 cat it's amazing baby cats me. I'll goo goo Gaga baby cats. I'm cat number one I'm okay. It's all musical theater tropes. It's all cat tropes. It's really very funny. I'm sure it exists somewhere. Yes, Brett Gellman's 1000 Cats. I just tapped it in online. You can see it.

It's on Funny or Die Presents on HBO, but you can watch it right here. You can see it online. It's one of the most amazing things. So, so good. One of the greatest things I've ever seen happen, both live and we've all done the Telluride Comedy Festival before,

and one year, Brett Gellman came and did 1000 Cats in Telluride and the audience revolted against him. The audience of like, listen, I love love love as I do. Of old wealthy Telluridians was like, no, we don't want this. They were not quite prepared. I mean, Brett Gellman is in a black unitard, that's like, it's like don't want this. I mean, that guy is in a unit, a black unitard.

That's like, it's like a woman's unitard, like a dance leotard where sort of like half of his shoulders a real scoop neck. I mean, I'll never forget the image of him in that black unitard. And this is 22nd street, UCB. So this is probably 1999 or 2000 that he did it. And I was like, it is an incredible show. So this is probably 1999. Yeah, I remember that he did it. And I was like, it is a an incredible show. So very much worth I'm glad you were you said it's somewhere. If you type in 1000 cats online, oh, great. And you can kind

of find it to see that. And it's interesting because 1000 cats like, I remember I love that show so much. And we are the robot. I mean, I remember lines. Oh, it's so good. And it has what this movie does not, which is also just a sense of joy. Joy. Yes. Joyful about this film. And that's one of the reasons why I actually do love musicals, because I find them to be joy filled. And this film, there's not an ounce of joy

in any of the numbers. It is really actually quite depressing to be with these cats. I mean, I never knew what was going on with the cats, but to be with them in the dark, grim London streets at night was very, quite depressing. While they're basically chasing the dream of death. You know what I mean?

Like that's the story of the story of the play appears to be compete for the right to die. Get us out of this horrible, horrible existence in which they seem to have the run of the land, but that's neither here nor there. And now I'm like, what do these cats know that we don't? I mean, I don't know. I'm getting, I want to, honestly,

I want to stop talking about this. I want to give a shout out to our, a friend of the show, Kate Ward, who recently just had a, Kate basically had COVID and really is recovering right now and is just a friend and a fan of the show and we see her tonight. So thank you, Kate.

I'm glad that you are feeling better and we are just sending you a lot of love. Please wear a mask, everybody. Please wear a mask. Please wear a mask. That brings us to the end of our live show. A big thank you to Paul F. Tompkins, his Andrew Ledweber and Seth Rogan

for calling in with his second opinion. People, if you like this live show, we had so much fun doing it. We're coming back in December to do two back-to-back live shows. That's right, two live shows, two different movies on December 11th and December 18th. Each show is only $15, but if you buy a ticket for both, it is only $25.

Two amazing Christmas movies we'll be talking about. One with Melissa Joan Hart as a baker, $15, but if you buy a ticket for both, it is only $25. Two amazing Christmas movies we'll be talking about. One with Melissa Joan Hart as a baker, so we're bringing her back into the Christmas mix. And another one with Vanessa Hudgens, who falls in love with a Christmas night. Yeah, it's gonna be a lot of fun. Go to HDTGM.com to find out more information about both of those shows.

And I just wanna let you all know that if you buy a ticket for the show and you can't somehow make the live performance, it is available for you to watch for 48 hours after the live show. So you have all weekend to catch up and watch the show if you can't make it live. Although we love having you live

because we take your questions, we do fun stuff with the audience. And like always, we cut out a little bit of the show. Now I know we talked a lot about musicals today, but if you like documentaries, well, you're in luck. I directed a brand new documentary for Disney+, all about the obscure characters in the Marvel universe. Now, you don't have to be a fan of Marvel.

You don't have to know anything about comic books. You just have to like interesting stories. And this documentary series, where there are eight new documentaries, all on Disney+, under the title Marvel 616. I directed the one called Lost and Found. It has Jon Hamm and Nicole Byer, Rachel Bloom, Jack McBrayer, and so many more.

Plus, some of your favorite comic book creators like Reggie Hudlin and Donny Cates and Jerry Duggan. It's really, really fun. I had such a great time going deep, basically, into the world of Marvel and having all those people help me launch a brand new Marvel franchise. Checking out only on Disney Plus. Marvel 616, my episode, Lost and Found. And just a reminder, you can always follow me on

Twitch. I'm just twitch.tv slash Paul Scheer. Rob Hubel and I host a show every single Thursday. It is so much fun. Jason has been a part of it. June has been a part of it. You will see us popping up and we're gonna be doing some other fun things after Thanksgiving and into the holidays. So keep your eye out on that. If you want to weigh in on this show, and I really do want you to weigh in on the show, please, please, please do tell us what you think about this episode by joining our mini

episode or you could just talk to me about your weird family at Thanksgiving. Give me a call at 619-P-A-U-L-A-S-K. That's 619 Paul Ask. You can talk about anything and everything about cats or your life or your job or being stuck at home in quarantine. I am there for you. Let's do this people. And a big giant thanks to everyone behind the scenes who puts this show together.

I'm talking about our super producer, Cody Fisher, who organized this entire thing. Molly Reynolds, who's working diligently behind the scenes to make sure all the clips and everything went off without a hitch on our first very live virtual show. Of course, Devin Bryant, our engineer supreme, who makes this all sound good, even when June was talking into an iPhone, like microphone. It was very bizarre. And a huge shout out to our producer Averill Halley who picks all of our movies. I mean this is a no-brainer

but she is absolutely amazing because not only does she pick our movies, she picks our amazing clips and Nate Keiley for his great research. I mean on this one there was so much. He did a bang-up job as always. A big tip of the hat to Zach McAleese and of course Kyle Waldron who do some of our amazing art which you can find on our Facebook and Instagram page and while I'm talking about that, please remember to rate and review the show. We need it, we love it. It helps other people find the show. Keep on telling people about the show. If you liked our live show, tell other people about it. We love doing them. We are so excited to spend

some more time with you live virtually in December. Anyway, people, sign up for our mailing list, stay on top of everything, and we will see you next week. How did this get me? Here I am. Here I am.