How Did This Get Made? - Matinee Monday: Gymkata LIVE! (w/ Michael Showalter)

Episode Date: February 26, 2024

Michael Showalter (The Dropout, Search Party) joins Paul, June, and Jason to discuss the next level bonkers movie that combines gymnastics and karate— 1985's Gymkata! They get into Kurt Thomas flipping while he talks to himself, the questionable effectiveness of arrows, flag ninjas, the Village of the Crazies, and the infamous pommel horse scene. Plus, the audience Q&A makes us wonder how the director of Enter The Dragon went from working with Bruce Lee to Kurt Thomas. (Originally Released 08/27/2013) UPCOMING TOUR DATES IN: Belfast, Dublin, Glasgow, & London! Go to hdtgm.com for tix and info.Pre-Order Paul’s book about his childhood, Joyful Recollections of Trauma, wherever books are soldFor extra Matinee Monday content, visit Paul's YouTube page: youtube.com/paulscheerHDTGM Discord: discord.gg/hdtgmPaul’s Discord: discord.gg/paulscheerFollow Paul on Letterboxd: letterboxd.com/paulscheer/Check out Paul and Rob Huebel live on Twitch (www.twitch.tv/friendzone) every Thursday 8-10pm ESTSubscribe to Unspooled with Paul and Amy Nicholson here: listen.earwolf.com/unspooledSubscribe to The Deep Dive with Jessica St. Clair and June Diane Raphael here: www.thedeepdiveacademy.com/podcastCheck out The Jane Club over at www.janeclub.comCheck out new HDTGM merch over at https://www.teepublic.com/stores/hdtgmWhere to find Jason, June & Paul:@PaulScheer on Instagram & Twitter@Junediane on IG and @MsJuneDiane on TwitterJason is not on Twitter

Ever thought, wow, I'm enjoying this James Bond movie, but I wish there was more gymnastics in it Well, you're in luck we saw Jim Cotta, so you know you won't know how to disperse Let's roll in the mediocrity of subpar arts Perhaps we'll find the answer to the question How did this get paid? Hello people of Earth! And hello people of Los Angeles We are live at Largo For a very special episode of the show

Let me get it started right away by introducing my two co-hosts. Please welcome June Diane Raefiel. And Jason Manzukas. We have a very special guest tonight. One of the funniest people I know. Please welcome Michael Showalter. Jim Cotta. It is like the Hunger Games meets the room. I just want to start this off by saying this. Was this in the... Was a producer thinking that he was going to create a new martial art?

Because I don't understand the difference between karate and gymnastics. Like, I don't, I mean, besides the gymnastics equipment. Well, this just, this movie appears to be just gymnastics with people's faces where your feet are. I'm pretty sure he's just doing gymnastics. Only there are people in the way. Yeah.

doing gymnastics only there are people in the way. Yeah. Or it's just like karate with a flourish. It is it is as odd that whenever he is in trouble there happens to be. Oh, gymnastic equipment. Oh yeah, nearby. Oh, we're sending you into a country called parallel bars. Nearby. Oh, we're sending you into a country called Parallel Bars. There is literally a vault in one of the cities. There's a pommel horse. Yeah, you're right. A city square just has a pommel horse in the middle of it. Why?

They live in like the fucking middle ages, like goddamn animals. And there is a pommel horse in the center square of their goddamn town. Oh. Oh. Oh. We might be getting ahead of ourselves.

Yeah. Sorry. Yeah, we need to go back, because I actually learned a lot more about this movie from that trailer than I... We just watched the trailer. ...watched the entire film. Truly. I mean, what...

I asked the question, what is the premise of the movie? Well, here, Michael, I don't know if you felt this way, but when I first started watching this movie, I felt like the first act was somehow missing. Yes, like I checked, I rewound. I rewound and I was like, I must have missed like three scenes. Nope. I missed nothing. Right from the start. Well, this is basically, I pulled this clip because just to get us all in here,

this is basically how the movie starts, besides the amazing gymnastics opening. Well, I like too the very beginning of the movie starts, all of the credits are rolling over just a static shot of a handlebar. It's the least visually interesting opening of a movie I've ever seen. It's just a handlebar. I think that's bold. I think that's a bold choice. I think that's a bold choice the movie makes to say, just watch this because when this

shit's done, your mind is gonna get blown. I will also say that when he is doing the gymnastics in the beginning, they do a lot of like crotch camera work, which is not an impressive way to watch gymnastics. Like gymnastics is better from afar. Well, there's also that scene that there's, at minute eight in this movie, there begins a training montage. And then at minute nine, it is over.

Yeah, which is inexplicable. Why we're training already. But at one point he's trying to climb upstairs on his hands. It's the. All right, relax. It's the gym. It's the gym. Kata equivalent of the running on the beach scene in Rocky. Which is, he can't do it, he can't do it.

He can almost do it. He can almost do it, and then he can do it. He can. Well, but meanwhile, the entirety of that section which they keep returning to is a camera right above his dick. It is a camera, He is upside down. Ladies, relax. They're excited about the awesome dick package of Kurt Thomas, Olympian.

The other thing, the other amazing thing about the training sequence, and we are cutting ahead, is the guy with the gigantic eagle? No! What is it? What is it, an eagle or a hawk? No, he's chopping wood. He's chopping wood.

He's chopping wood. And his teacher, his teacher tells him you have to be able to chop it so it doesn't make a sound, right? You hear that? And then it pans over, that's the teacher. And the eagle never flies. The lesson doesn't need a falcon.

I want to just address one thing first. Well, first let me talk about this teacher. I wrote down his quote. Now he's teaching him how to chop wood. Do not hear the wood split. Hear only the sound of the axe cutting the air. Read the air itself. It has much to say to you.

Okay, I guess... Guess what? The air is saying, what's up with this fucking Falcon? When are we gonna get to that? I feel like the Falcon was just added as, like, extra, like, shit, we need some animals. I will say though this, we talked about this, walking up the stairs on his palms.

Would you, you would think was that, without coming to play in the third act? And some, that technique will show itself. You would also think there are multiple scenes in which men prove that they are masters of specific martial art weapons. And you would be like, oh, so I guess Samir eventually is going to attack him with his sigh, right? Those are sigh, right? Nope. Nope. Nope. He'll use the bow and arrow. This guy is gonna use his ninja axes or

whatever those things are. Those things he flips flips around, nope. Never seen it. Never seen it again. Basically, just if you have not seen the movie, I'll just quickly say that they, this is what we're missing. Somehow an Olympian is a secret agent. We don't know how it happened. He says, I did write this down,

because he asks the CIA guy, like, why, why don't you just, cause, well, you'll explain that they're gonna go steal something and that's gonna save the world. Yeah, we can talk, you can talk about it. They're gonna save the world, but he says, why don't you just send military in to do this insane thing that they're asking to do? And he's, the CIA says because direct military action is out of style.

That's a quote from the movie. Well, and that's their logic. That is a theme that runs through the movie, like the old versus the new, things that are out of style. Joan Rivers fashion police in Congress. That's in style. that's out of style. Nuclear weapons out. Sending guys in for karate gymnastics in.

But wait, so I want to talk about- Seriously Joan, pay your writers. I do want to talk about that thing which is, what is he trying to do? It's the star, yeah, because I'm in guard. Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's in the title card at the end. He has to go... He has to go to this country where apparently Mel Brooks is the leader.

Well, by the way... Yeah! By the way... Right! Right! Mel Brooks. By the way, the name of the country is Parmesan. Yeah, yeah. Like a Parmesan sandwich.

Like a chicken Parmesan. It's Parm- Parm-a-stan. Let me get a chicken Parm-a-... Okay, relax. We'll also, the father, his daughter, the princess, is also a part of the story. And I just wanted to talk about the resemblance of the two. OK.

Yep. Well, it should be pointed out. She barely speaks English. She, both of them speak. Neither have the same accent. Wait a second. Neither has a discernible accent at times. Wait a second.

This is a direct quote from the movie. has a discernible accent. Wait a second. This is a direct quote from the movie. While whatever his name is, we even know his name, the hero, the hero, the hero, Kurt Thomas, Kurt Thomas. What's his character's name? What? John Cabot. While Cabot is training, the CIA guy can be overheard saying, the princess is interesting, her mother is from Indonesia. Yes, I wrote that down too! I wrote that down! Ergo, she is interesting.

Well, let's just play a part of basically, so he has to go and train, because if he if he this is the premise of the movie if he goes in to this Parmesan and competes in something called the game and wins no one is one in 900 years but if he wins he is granted a request anything he wants and what he request. Anything he wants. And what he wants is for the US to put their Star Wars defense system in their country. So they can-

They want a military base basically. Exactly. I will also just point out to you just to put some thought behind it. This is the year the Americans boycotted the Olympics in Russia, in 1985. That's when they shot this, so he had some free time, the Kurt Thomas. Nice.

Here is... It's a very politically charged film. Oh, yeah. It's kind of like Gorky Park with Jim Cotta. Here is the explanation of Jim Cotta. We'll just take a listen here. Here we go. Oh, and by the way, this dude's totally into the princess because she's smoking hot.

So he's thinking about her and they're like, think about the game, dude. Here you go. Looking good. I'm never going to make it. He does crazy things. The game's never the same. Other countries are training their best men now to defeat you. She's driving me nuts.

You know she doesn't talk? The princess will come around. Interesting background. Her mother was Indonesian. You know, one of the problems that you've got to face is being able to silt the essence of what you've learned. It's a subtle blend of the martial arts of the East, the fighting skills of the West.

You know, Karate, you're a special gymnast. Everyone basically says nothing for the first 15 minutes of like that. Who is this guy? Is this guy part of the CIA? Cause he also feels like he knows him and his dad. Oh yeah, his dad is an ex-secret agent or something, right? Yeah.

Because his dad achieves this as well. The cold open is that. The cold open is a man playing the game. Yes. Being chased by ninjas. Yeah, being chased by ninjas. He like is like a Bobo Kurt Russell. That's...

Yeah. And he get... We don't know it's his dad spoilers for this terrible terrible garbage movie But that guy is trying to climb across a chasm across a rope And someone shoots him with a goddamn arrow That is why young Jonathan Cabot is forced to compete But I mean like the thing that blew my mind about this movie is at every turn insane. Oh things are happening to him like crazy next level bonkers stuff is happening

to him constantly in the movie and he is always like this. The one thing I'll say is I buy that he is a dumb gymnast. Yeah, because he plays it really well. He is every step of the way. Like, huh, will you look at this? Oh my God, where's Gomez? Where's... I do want to... You guys see Gomez? Oh, shit.

Gomez has a pitchfork in his face. Oh, Gomez. I do feel like we're gonna get to something that I really want to talk about in a second, but I feel like we've got to talk about the love story because here in the beginning, moments is when it really heats up between him and the person. Well, by the way, I love that he sets up,

but she doesn't speak, she hasn't spoken a word. And so you're thinking there's gonna be some, like, crazy reveal where she starts talking. No. Yep. She just in one scene starts talking. Yeah. Do you want to do you want to see I'll just for the for the people in the theater.

I'm going to play you guys their first their first meeting. Yeah. It's pretty everybody. Don't jerk it. I mean, this is, you know, this is like one of the coolest, like sexiest Sam and Diane kind of love relationships. The sexual tension is non-existent. Here we go.

The princess is an expert at the game, and she'll be handling your training from now on. You'll be leaving together. Part of the training, huh? What a game. Hey! Hit the ball! Hey, wait! What a game. Hey, hit the ball. Hey, wait.

I'm slandering a wall. Ah! Karate chop. What she's saying is, don't trust anybody. Hope to tell ya. What does he say there? Hope to tell ya? Hope to tell ya. Hope to tell ya? Hope? What does that say there? Hope to tell ya? Hope to tell ya?

Hope to tell ya? What does that even mean? Hope to tell ya. It's what they say in Jim Cotta Circles. Did anyone else have that? When you wish that you heard something before it happened. No, did anyone notice the Foley sound work in the movie? Oh yeah.

Okay. It starts here. but the market scenes are insane. And it must be pointed out, he's wearing sneakers, and it's like clip, clop, clip, clop, clip, clop. He sounds like a horse going down a cobblestone street. But my question is this, the princess in the beginning is shown as being, she's well versed in the game, she's deadly, as we saw with that one karate chop to the upper shoulder blade.

And, but yet she seems always- And also that there's an element of like in a James Bond movie where we don't know if she's good or bad. Yes, right. We don't know if we can trust her. Cause he keeps getting closer and then she'll pull a knife on him at the last minute. That happens more than once. It does.

But she never shows off her skills. She's just a captive from the majority of the film. At a certain point, I also thought, oh, she's now in place to be his ally during the game. No. She just runs around. She's like a ninja basically, who runs around being like,

where is everybody? What's happening? Help! How come nobody's back yet from the game? And also the other women in this movie who are over 18 years old are monsters. Yes. They're just complete monsters.

Yeah. That's like garbage bags full of mayonnaise. Toothless garbage bags full of mayonnaise. Toothless sexy garbage bags full of gorgeous rancid mayonnaise. So he falls in love with this beautiful girl. Within the first 12 minutes of the movie, he has won the Olympics, completely trained for a secret mission in another country,

and fucked the princess. We are at minute 13 now. And, and, and they're the most... I hated this love relationship. She's giving him the most lackluster massage cause she's like giving him a rub down at the end of the night. Then they get into like a lazy kiss. They're kissing is lazy.

It just seems like I don't want to kiss, but I will. I do feel like every time he's gonna pull away and secretly wants to be like gross. Like, gross. Like... Gross. Her lips make me tired. Ugh. All right, so he goes...

Did we get it? Did we get... Ah! We gotta do it again, Barf. I know we're playing a lot of clips, but it's so good. Is it worth playing the scene where he talks to himself and the flips? Oh, God. Oh, God. This, you can tell that this was his big acting moment.

Do you think this is the scene he auditioned? Well, I was gonna say, I was gonna say this might be his audition scene, but I don't think there's any other gymnasts that were out for this. I was just gonna, but I don't think there's any other gymnasts that were out for this. I don't think there were auditions for this movie. I think he was given the part. He was. But yeah, this is the scene where-

Okay, stop, Bail, can you do a backflip? I actually, I think there's, no, I don't know this at all, but I think there may be a version of this, this like the story behind the movie, which is that, it was just a script about a guy, you know, who was going on this mission. They decided to cast him a gymnast and so made up Jim Cotta to work.

Well, I will say this. The first credit at the credit, at the credit, the first thing to come up, it says that it's based on a book. Yes. Which I did some research on. Okay. book, which I did some research on. The book is called The Terrible Game by Dan Tyler Moore and zero gymnastics in the story. Oh, interesting. Here is this is a review that was on Amazon of the book.

I picked up this book because of the cover art. It's pretty good. I'm already in. Gladiators with swords and hooked ends. That's the cover art. This story is a modern spy thriller with a unique twist. Spoiler, in Russia, there's a small plateau populated by a warrior race. A very narrow path leads up to their country, easily defended. Any visitor must play the terrible game, and if they survive, they can interact with the

locals. The game involves multiple contests of... That's a prize? Yes. By the way, we've seen the locals. The game includes multiple contests of horsemanship, archery, wrestling, and swordsmanship with the hook swords. In 500 years, none have survived. Our hero is on a mission to establish diplomatic relations, but first, he must win the terrible game. So yeah, there's not much there. There's not that that is, by the way, I want to read that book.

So that is, that is- Let's start an offshoot podcast called, How Did This Get Written? Where we just, we just talk about terrible books. What about page 86? I couldn't believe they used, oh boy. Here we go, this is, here's the best acting scene from Kurt Thomas. Here we go.

Check out the shorts. Good morning, Princess. Good morning, Jonathan. You're looking handsome as always. If you're listening, he's doing flips. Did you sleep well? Like a log! She likes that. She likes that half twist. What?

She has not spoken yet. Kurt Thomas knows what he wants. That's a lazy kissing right there. There's a knife. Don't trust anybody, right? Sometimes you just got to take a chance. Gross. She's holding a knife by his head.

Gross. Bad kissing. Oh, knife into the wall. One of the first times we see a knife thrown into a wall. Not the last. Again, I have no idea why he's attracted to her. She's hot. She shows no interest in him, but she's into him.

I mean, there's not even, like, I guess in this world, like, a smile is consent to be kissed. Because she has a smokey... Sometimes he's got a hope test. They've not shared anything. I will say this about the movie. There is something exciting about knowing someone's doing their own stunts and knowing like,

okay guys just listen for a second, for a second. Like Jackie Chan. Yeah there is something to it. Yeah exactly, there's something to it where it's like okay, this man is doing all of his own gymnastics. I do appreciate it on a level. On a level. No, no, we all love it. I would say yes, but not for this movie. This movie, not super exciting. We were talking about... It's weird because I was just listening to it now. It does sound like it's almost a whip sound.

Yeah. And every punch is... Pshh! Pshh! Everyone is punching. We were talking about this backstage and you can say like, oh, well this is a bad movie. It's not supposed to be good.

The budget was... Oh, guess. What is the budget? Of a 1985 movie. So budget was, guess, what is the budget of a 1985 movie? So 85 inflation, what do you guys think? Thirty million? Okay, that's a little high. 85. 500 million. I don't know. What are we doing? That is high. I have no idea. $1. $8.5 million. Right? So this doesn't look like that. That's a lot of money. That's a lot of money. The vast majority of this movie looks like it was shot in a cabin in the Catskills and and inexplicably a cornfield. Yeah. Yeah. What is the most terrifying element of the game, but surviving the cornfield? Well, well, that's not the most terrifying elephant element of the game but surviving the cornfield. Well, that's not the most terrifying element of the game.

But I don't want to give away where, because I felt like watching this movie, it was unbearable until the end. Oh, until the end. And the village of the crazies. Well, the village of the crazies. We've got to get to the village of the crazies. But I don't want to, but I don't want to. The village of the crazies. Well, the village of the crazies. We gotta get to the village of the crazies. But I don't wanna, but I don't wanna. You're right. The village of the crazies. I don't wanna skip to that. Well, let's, I will.

So you didn't enjoy any of the gymnastics? What's that? I think I genuinely do like gymnastics. I enjoy watching it. I did too, but I was actually felt like, and I actually remember when this movie came out. I saw this movie in movie theaters. I didn't see it.

I didn't see it, wow. So many times in different theaters. No, just once. I remember when movie came out. I saw this movie in movie theaters. I didn't see it. I didn't see it. So many times in different theaters. I remember when it came out and there was like this and then the Lombada movie and da-da-da. The Forbidden Dance? The Forbidden Dance. Well, there was Lombada and the Forbidden Dance at two different movies.

Yeah, those were both good. There was a whole spate of movies. But I was disappointed that I thought Jim Cota was going to be like this whole crazy thing But it's like most of the time he's just doing karate and then every once in a while He does some gymnastics Basically, that's Jim Cotta. Yeah, it's like he's doing karate, but like he'll do a cartwheel to do the karate. Yeah I want to put this

to do the karate. Yeah. I want to put this... I just want to put this a little bit more in perspective for you, because I'm just going back to this. 1985, number one movie at the box office, Back to the Future. Budget, $18 million. This movie, 1985, budget, $8 million. That's a high-budgeted movie.

It's a very high budget. All right, yeah, 1985. Like, this is a great year for movies, except for this one. Did even make the top 100? There's a shot, there's a million times we see people climbing over the river and on that rope. And there's never a wide shot of it. Like, to see people getting on the rope

and getting off the rope. No, and I noticed too that they did reuse the close-up shot of the really scary townspeople. Yes, yes. Twice, they're like incredibly inbred looking townspeople. Yes, the transpecs were romantic. I think they spent all their money on extras because they were all very real.

All right, and horses. They go to horses. I want somebody to find out how many minutes of this movie is just horse feet running about. To me, that's most of the movie. How many minutes? I also want to know at the feast thing, celebration thing, there is a game being played between men on horses with nets.

I love this. It was like, what's this horse and net game? It's like netting a ninja. It's ninja nets. It's just two ninjas on horses with giant butterfly nets with circular net. Trying to capture each other. What is happening?

Like, bring in the ninjas on horses and give them nets. And then Mel Brooks is like, I don't know. What are these guys going to do? And there's the two guys that are training him in the beginning of the movie. which by the way I watch the beginning twice. He trains for two months. Yeah. They say that. The training takes two months. One of the guys training him seems to be riding on a Clydesdale horse. Yes. Another animal that they could get with that in the

hog. It's like what can we get with this amount of money? Well my buddy's got a Clydesdale. Okay give it to us. My buddy's got a sick Clydesdale, we'll use it. The, again I was going to talk about that horse the net thing. It would be interesting if they were running at each other. They're just simply closer than we are to each other in a semi circle. Just right on horseback. You could touch.

You could touch them as easily like there's not a horseman and I could win at this game instantly. This is a weird thing about the movie because you think to yourself, oh, I guess this is going to come back at some point during the games like this is a type of to learn. None of this is coming back. Oh, this is enjoy it while it's some point during the games. Like this is a type of fighting. None of this is coming back. Enjoy it while it's happening. This is gone forever.

But the listen to the sound of the ax hitting the wood, that came back. That did. Guys, I want to remember. It came back when he realized if I go like something to do with an arrow. Yes. He's in the woods.

He heard Thor. Is that good? Yes. He's in the woods with Thor? Is that good, is that good thing? Yes. Thor. Thor? OK. What? Thor, good.

All right, shut the fuck up. These guys have seen the movie. They're excited. And he remembers. He remembers listening to the wind. And so he can hear the arrow so he can duck just in time. And then the arrow goes into Thor. And then Thor lives for a long time.

Yeah. Thor breaks the arrow goes into Thor. And then Thor lives for a long time. Yeah. Thor breaks the arrow off in his heart, but then lives for a long time. That's what's so weird about arrows in this movie. There's a lot of arrows in this movie, and their effectiveness is questionable. Yeah. Yeah, like an arrow.

Sometimes a direct hit, that person is alive and fine. Does his father that we don't know is his father get hit with an arrow in the first yes because then he and he's on the rope bridge so he falls doesn't he fall yeah and you hear a broken oh yeah that's another effect that's added in of everyone who falls ago it's not quite a vilhelm scream no it's that. They couldn't afford that one. It's almost that.

I want to talk about this. He goes to Carabelle and the Caspian Sea. I mean, they really want to get out there. They put it up on the screen. But now he is a secret agent on a secret mission. It's trying to be like James Bond. This guy cannot dress more loudly. Oh, yeah.

He is wearing a red sweater and white pants. Like you and everyone else is in turbines and they go, I'm in a country. Like he is basically a red, white, blue. He's basically a walking American flag. And he is clear. Like this is not what a special agent should be dressed as. Well what happens is they get there, him, the princess,

these other fucking dildos, and they're like, okay, you're going in tomorrow. Today, you've got some time, maybe go see the market. What? I was expecting him to go like, hey, so we have some extra time, do I get per diem? And I do it. Or like, you've got extra time, sit right the fuck here. Don't go anywhere. Don't compromise the goddamn mission.

Yeah, don't leave this goddamn read a map. Wait, I have a question. Why were they there? Why did they have that intermediary? Why was it just go to parmig? Oh, and why? Why did they show them? What was accomplished in that? No, I think that the gymn gymnast is like, look guys, I'll do this, but I need a break. I'm not going to be on a boat. Literally, I can't go straight to Parmesan. I need a full mission. I need to stop over in wherever that isn't this like the, yeah, it's a stopover. And they have like, don't aren't they like Parmistani, like counter agents

who are helping them out the guy with the weird mustache goatee scenario? Well, but then he is a double. By the way, and then the C.I.A. goes shows up and is mowing people down with his machine gun. It's literally turns out to be a mass murderer. Oh, it's shooting that gun like he has not a care in the world. I just destroying that room. Brrra, brrra, brrra.

I will say, I will say though, here, I mean, I'll rewrite this one section and just go, how about this, you gotta stop in this town and do some gymnastics for the people. That's their cover, your gymnast. This is how we can get you into this country. It'll be as simple as that. What I like to have a free night off in town,

enjoy the nightlife with a princess. And the nightlife is just doing shopping. If only you had been in the writer's room, you could have saved it. I could have. Can I ask a question? I need to, because it took kind of what you're saying to take that another step further is,

he's going to play the game, right? Yeah. Yes. Okay, so what's the secret? None. That's what I don't understand. I don't understand. The secret is, they know who he is. But they don't know what his request is. That's the secret. Who fucking cares what his request is? He's clearly an American dude who's coming to play the game. And why don't they, why don't they send? But nobody's won the game in 900 years. Right. But other countries, it's all different countries. So like, oh, it's a secret who he is?

No, that's what I'm wondering. I didn't know that. It's not. Is it a secret? No, it's not. But are the other people in the market? Why are they trying to kill him in the other country? But here's the thing.

Are the other people also from other countries trying to get a nuclear base there too? Or are they just competing in the game? They in the game. They just want to win cash and prizes if they want to get they want to get their one request. Who knows what Gomez was also we talked about. Gomez is like get me the fuck out of wherever I'm from. What's Gomez? Who is Gomez Gomez inexplicably in the middle of the thing he becomes like

really attached to one of the other competitors and he's like where's Gomez and then he sees Gomez like impaled by pitch yeah yeah Gomez here and then his mind reboots and like a fucking dumb robot he runs off to like jump around like an asshole in like a country that appears to be two thousand years in the past run by Mel Brooks. This is a fucking terrible movie. Well wait a second. It's it's it's it's not even it's like Mel Brooks as his character from history like you know or from Spaceballs. It actually reminded me of the Spaceballs character. I felt like he was going to be like may the Schwartz be with you but you mentioned the 2000 years ago thing did anyone pick up the part about the

20s yes okay she says to him because this was like you notice like it literally looks like it's the medieval like it's the whole thing looks like a bad Renaissance fair. It was the worst back lot of Universal. Yeah. So, but she's just to clarify. So what year is the movie set in? In the present. In the present. In the present. And she explains to him something about the 20s. Have you heard about the 20s? Because there's some social unrest in Parmistan. OK. Sure.

Please stop saying Parmistan. He says, he says, what are the 20s? He goes, what do you mean the 20s? Did you miss this? No, I did. Yeah. OK. The 20s were, the 20s are the young people.

OK. And the 20s live in Parmistan. And they're the young people who are in their twenties and who want Parmistan to enter into the 20th century. Yes. Yes. And they and Samir is the guy who's gonna. Well, her, her father, the day after the game is going to announce that from now on, Parmistan is going to be, is well, Well, it's gonna be the best of the old and the best of the new, but Samir is gonna let that happen.

Because Samir won. Now, I will also just go back and say this, we're talking about the Mel Brooks character. He is the most affable gentleman. He is so friendly, so lovely, yet he runs this fucking crazy-ass game where people are getting brutally killed all the time. Like, yeah.

Not only that, but he's taking... And not put a stop to that. Like, and how to get elected. He's taking prisoners. Yes. And who are, I guess, gonna die in jail anyway and just releasing them to the game. Wait, he's like a Saddam Hussein type.

Go ahead. And the game, he goes, oh, the locals love the game. How do they watch it? The game. No way to know. It's like the Hunger Games. I get they're watching it on screen, Running Man, that Schwarzenegger movie.

They watch it. Here's what's weird, though. It's happening in a cornfield. It's like golf, though. You sort of drift from one hole to the next. OK, big game. Let's go over to the ropes course, you know. You see them running at the beginning of the games.

To what? Where were they running to though? Who the fuck knows? To the cornfield. They're running to the cornfield. They often cut back. I thought they cut back to the courtyard during the middle of the game.

And everyone was like applauding. Like, there was a game of telephone going, someone just got lit on fire, like, yeah! I will say this, the game, like, conceptually, I love this idea. Conceptually, I love this game, you know, like, the most dangerous game. I like people hunting people. I like that. Just as an idea, I'm a fan of it.

But, at the, so I was like, oh, we're finally gonna get to this game and this is gonna be a cool part of this movie. The game is run through a cornfield, climb up a rope, climb across a rope, Village of the Crazies. We are gonna, Village of the Crazies deserves as much time as we can give to it.

I will just say, I wrote this down, I just was looking at notes and I said, I wrote down this note, there are moments in this movie where I am confused about how I am supposed to feel. I just don't know, like, is this a romantic moment? Is this a sad moment? Is this a happy moment? You don't know, but let's not hold off.

I know, I'm just realizing now to segue into Village of the Crazies, the the Tongueless Lady in the beginning when he's... Oh my God, I need to talk to her. She actually... I do need to talk about her too, but she should have been in the Village of the Crazies. Well, she was clearly probably rescued from the Village of the Crazies and made some sort of house service. I have a feeling that she was like, yeah,

like the Village of the Crazies is where she would live, but she works in the... I feel like, yeah, like the village is the craziest where she would live, but she works in the, in Palm Island. I feel like, yeah, she works in the castle. At night, she goes to VOC to sleep. She comes back and then she's good. She jumps on the local rope bridge. And here's what I couldn't understand. This is a woman who, it is established,

her tongue has been cut out of her mouth. She cannot talk, okay? At a certain point, dumb dumb idiot over here, this guy, grabs her and he goes, at knife point, he may take me to the princess's room or whatever, and then he's like, is this the room? And she goes, and then he goes, tell the princess to meet me in the garden.

And also, hey, you're a secret agent. Wait, Jason, Jason, but she also, he also, he also gives her the knife. Yeah. And she just, like, why did he give her, why did he trust her to do that? I think he was saying like, I'm not going to hurt you. Here's the knife. Yeah. Tell the princess I'm going to princess I'm in the garden. However, an insane village of the craziest person communicates.

She has no talk. Yeah, but then in the next scene, they're in the garden. It all worked out. It all worked out just fine. But here's what I want to understand. The first scene with her, he wakes up, she's there. It's terrifying. It's absolutely terrifying.

Here's a picture of her if you have not seen her heading him and it seems terrible what's happening but then he sort of resigns himself to it yeah there it seems like consent yeah well she's his only ally in the palace I think one is it the bed of pillows when she wakes up is that the bed of pillows when she wakes up? Is that the bed of pillows? Same woman seems like some of the stuff from the old school is pretty good. If they keep that and they bring cell phones and they're doing good, the bed of pillows. I feel like you know, look, Kurt Thomas is going to be a very trusting guy. He's not going to judge her because she has her tongue cut out and she looks the same. She's also not in any sort of servant garb.

She's in her crazy garb, isn't she? Yes. Yeah, she's always in her crazy garb. Let's talk about Village of the Crazies. Oh, and flag ninjas. I wanna talk about flag ninjas too. Oh, flag ninjas. To get to Village of the Crazies,

you gotta run by flag ninjas. And flag ninjas are basically ninjas. They're just refs. They're just linemen. The worst use of a ninja ever. They look like they're just holding up storm front flags. And they don't say anything. Can I have a question?

I have a question just before we get to Village of the Crazies, which is going to be amazing. Before he goes into the city, they give him a tutorial on all the gear he's going to bring in, which includes like a thing that shoots a razor blade and a bunch of other, like, acts and all this shit. Oh, you're going to ask, why does that come not? He never has any of that garbage.

Because maybe that guy, that was evil, that double-crossed him him never gave it to him. No, but CAA guy shot that guy. Yeah, but maybe he like hit it. I was like, I was like, I felt like they wanted to have a scene where they were like, well, we'll have a scene where he has like cool weapons. Well, but you can't use weapons in the game. Oh, it'll never come back.

That's a thing. It's like a bad James Bond movie. Everything is a it's like it Bad James Bond movie. Everything is a, it's like elements are there. It's like gadgets, girl, mission, bad guy. But there's no line that pulls them all together. Well, here's the one thing I will say. There's a scene in this, in, okay, we're gonna get to Village of the Crazies now. There's a scene in Village of the Crazies. So Village of the Crazies now. There's a scene in Village of the Crazies.

So Village of the Crazies is the final test and it is a village. Guys, I'm sure you see this coming. It is full of crazies. This woman being the kind of example. Anyway, at a certain point, there's like a nine to 45 minute slow motion chase sequence where he is chased with pitchforks like, and I wrote in here, I was like,

oh, this is basically like Frankenstein, where he's being chased with pitchforks by village people in the middle ages. And two dogs. And two dogs. Two very, very scary dogs. I feel as though this movie is a movie written by Frankenstein

telling his life story in a slightly more cool way. He's like, people will understand me now if I write this. Rrrrr. Did it, did it, like, part of me made, I made, I was thinking that it reminded me of that Bruce Lee movie, is an enter the dragon where he goes in and he has to like fight all these different. Yeah, these levels.

But here, the levels were only just different, like, crazies. Like, the first crazy, I think the first time he knows in the village of the crazies is when that guy, like, touches, like, a pole. And then he's like, ah! And then he takes out a knife and just cuts off his own hand. Yeah, yeah.

That's the first time that he's in Village. They're crazy. Now, are we to presume that was the only way that man knew to get himself off of that pole? And he only, he only gripped it. I rewound it and I was like, is it a freezing pole? Is the pole really like in the Christmas story where the tongue is stuck to it?

No, it looks to me just like a sewer pipe. Yep. He touched it and he's like, ah! Yep. Then he walks away and falls down. Yeah, I felt like the movie got good during Village of the Craziest. Yeah, also because all of the insane people

were well-versed in martial arts. Yeah. Maybe these are all the people who lost the game, and then they're forced to live there and think about their defeat. Like, oh, I could have gotten my one request in. But how? No, I mean, to lose the game is to die.

Die, no, yeah. I don't know there are like. How amazing was it when he goes into the pig thing, and he's walking on the pigs and he's walking on the pigs. He's walking on the pigs, and then- In this movie, he walks on pigs. And then that's when Thor, that's when- He walks on the backs of pigs for a while.

And then Thor comes back inexplicably, Thor's back, and then the pigs eat Thor. Yeah. Okay, there's a sound effect there that I really want to get to the bottom of, because it seems when Thor is all right, Thor dies that he squeals. Like a pig.

Like a pig. Wait, isn't it the pig squealing? I swear it's not a pig squealing. There are other pigs there. There are pigs squealing in that scene. But when he gets, I don't know, someone throws something at him and he gets. I think they hit him, it's a pitchfork.

It's a pitchfork. It's a multiple pitchforks or something. It's a human pig squeal. We're talking Ned Beatty Deliverance squeal? I'm gonna say that I'm not, this movie does not shy away from having their heroes whimper and squeal John and Cabot whimpers that one You're the hero of this movie be like like Bruce wills and die are going

I also like the costumes in this movie Thorg I, I do, was he padded with something? I mean, just the dimensions of him didn't make sense to me. Like, they were just crazy. He had a body type. I found deeply confusing. Yeah. He didn't line up. I didn't know what was going on up top, up top, or down below. Okay.

I couldn't make heads or tails of that guy's body situation. And his face was a goddamn mess. His face, face to head with the headband scenario was very weird. I have a theory that this guy was a top secret muppet that Jim Henson had created. I believe it. And this was to be the launch of it. Well, I was like, I want to...

Well, but also Kirk's game... Kirk, Kirk, what's his name? Kirk. Kirk Thomas or Cabot. So, Kirk's, you know, been preparing for the games for such a long time. You'd think he would have put together some sort of like an outfit that would have made sense. He's essentially from what my eyes can see. Gens and a T-shirt.

No, no Michael. He's wearing khakis. Yeah. He's wearing khakis. Yeah. He's wearing khakis like maybe with police. With an elastic waistband. His pants have an elastic waistband. But you see my theory on that is there's only certain things you could do gymnastics in.

Yeah. So they're like, oh he got like that's all he's gotta wear. But why not? He can't do gymnastics in sweats. You think he needs to weigh you down. If it gets wet, controversial statement. Sure. None of the training was relevant to the game. Like way. The way I say, what about the time when he took that one class of just watching a guy be blindfolded and do swords. You might even ask, did he do the swords blindfolded? Nope.

Well, he just watched someone. I wrote down, at a certain point in this, I wrote down, does everyone get a martial arts weapon jerk off scene? Because that guy has it. And then when Samir is challenged, he's like, oh, I see you looking at my girl. Guess what? He's like, he's like baby Kevin Sorbo.

I have a, yeah. I'm going to take off my fucking shirt and I'm going to jam on these sigh for a while. Yeah. Fucking. Uh, uh, uh, uh. Uh, uh, uh. And then he throws them like, like he's jizzing,

like throws the sigh right at, right at KT, right? So he's like jizzing all over. You guys get where I'm going with this, right? This movie is deep. You're saying it was symbolism. I was saying, yeah, I'm saying there is like deep subtext to this movie. I was gonna play that scene,

please, why not, we're here. Let's play every scene. There we go. You must understand, she's mine. It's not over yet. So put your hardware back in your pants. Yeah! What is KT wearing?

Is he wearing- He's wearing the Obi-Wan Kenobi collection. He's wearing- I swear to God, he's wearing Luke Skywalker clothes. What the fuck is going on? And he has a, you see, Virgai has a lot of change of outfits. He did not bring one for the game. He's like, ah, I feel like in this scene, my character would wear a velour bathrobe.

VT, you're unstoppable, whatever you want. He's like, I feel like John Cabot, for the most part, wears elastic band pants and a velour bathrobe. I'll be in my trailer face fucking thorg if you need me. I want to go back to VOC for a second and ask, who was your crazy? I'm going to tell you my favorite crazy You've heard about yo see Yo see yo see

Yo see village is crazy. So you know, you know that like thing. It's like when you have like a mullet It's like business in the front party in the back There's a VO seer who also Keeps the same look. Oh, he's normal, normal, normal, normal. Turn around, no back. No back. Just ass, ass out. What's weird is that the front,

the front looks like a priest's vestiment. It's like a, it's not, it's not just clothes. It looks like a, like a holy man. Turn around. Very normal, boom. Print. Totally naked. Prints. Holy man, turned around. Very normal, boom. Print. Totally naked.

Prints. That is my, that is my village of the crazy fave. Well, that's a theme in Village of the Crazies is that don't, don't get too comfortable with what's on the front. Because someone could turn around. I liked that guy too. And reveal another face. Yeah.

Now was that, here's my question, was the first face we saw, was that a person he had killed and taken his face and sewn it off to the back of his head? Or was that? Well, the face was sort of so poorly constructed and it looked terrible. But for someone who lives in the village of the crazies, that's probably one of the best faces they've committed. He's probably like, the pioneer.

So do you think it's a real face or a mask? Or a face that's been turned into a mask? June is really taking that question to heart. What's going on in that? I mean, do you think that guy killed? OK, here's what I'll say. When I saw it, I thought it's a fake mask. I mean, it's a mask.

It's not that. Like Papier Machet? Yes. But what I wished it was, was a real face that that person had taken off... Silence of the Lam Style? Silence of the Lam Style. It rubs the lotion on its skin style? So that... wow, June goes dark for her imagining of what you would like.

I like that. I was watching the same thing, I had the same question, and I settled on, it's a real face. I settled on, that's a real face. This guy stole someone's face, and he wears it as a hair. He wears it. Michael C. That guy was my favorite of The Village of the Crazed.

Do you have a favorite VOC-er? No, no. No, I was so engaged at that moment. But I... There is... They slowed down the movie at this point because I guess they realized at a certain point that the first cut in came in at like 64 minutes. And they were like, okay guys, how do we extend it? And they slowed down things that don't need slowing down.

Well, there's the slow-mo. I wrote that. I had so many things to talk about in the slo-mo because it is slo-mo forever and the only thing you hear is his heartbeat and his aggressively increasingly more and more sexual panting. As this slo-mo scene continues it just starts to be like That whimper is really a, I'm becoming of a secret agent. And then, you know, but you're right, they needed to stretch it out because then they did the pommel horse fight scene, which goes on for hours.

It is why you've come to see this movie. We should play a clip of it. Playing in its entirety! Here we go. So, wait, I think you need to set it up a little bit, right? Yes, please, please set it up. Well, he's in the village of the crazies. He finds himself surrounded by tons of crazies,

and then, luckily, there's a pommel horse there. So lucky. For him to get on to and then as you said just kick so many people in the face. Let me ask you a question. Show. Is it, it's not a real pommel horse, it's just something in the middle of the square. No, it looks like a pommel horse. It is a pommel horse. It is a pommel. No.

Is it, is it set decorated to look older different than a palm horse? No, really? No, no, no, no. Why would they need handles on that thing? I looked at it very closely. No, it's a palm horse, but they clearly like painted it gray. Yeah, yeah, yeah, that's just... Here's the question. What in the world of the movie is it? I got to add, I have a theory. It was a place to hook up your horses. Yes, yes. I have a theory. I don't know. It was a place to hook up your horses.

Yes. In my mind they were like, yeah, you hook horses up to it. Okay, fine. Well, should we have a horse hooked up to it just to make... No. No, let's just let him jump around and hit people with his dumb feet. Um, well... But then the fight scene goes on so far past anything you could possibly imagine it going on past.

And it gets, I mean, it's repetitive for sure. Oh, there's nothing happening. He is, there is, okay, again, village of the crazies. That would presume it is full of abject lunatics. All of them have either swords, spears, or pitchforks. They are all attacking him from all sides. He is weaponless, but for his feet. And the pama horse is the delivery system for his thrashing.

I wish we could have the... Is anyone here a gymnast? Damn. All right, well, here we go. Here we go. Really? No gymnast? Damn. All right, well here we go. Here we go. Really? No gymnast? Here's what I'll say though about gymnast

and especially male gymnast. I mean, male gymnasts are the most physically fit people in the world. Excuse me? Wait a second. If we're gonna walk away with anything to say, I wanted to be, it's true. What they are able to do in terms of athleticism

is unbelievable. They have an incredible amount of, Oh, don't girl power this. They're very strong. Very, very strong. Very strong. All right, they're very strong. All right.

What about professional wrestlers? Professional wrestlers don't have to do the same amount Michael show Walter you You're you are wrestling Michael I'm a wrestling helmet. Well, but I am a gymnast, but I was much more tumbling than All right, let's see the scene that made this movie famous. All right, here we go. Pummel horse. The... The...

The... The... The... The... The... The... The... The...

The... The... The... The... The... The... The... The...

The... The... The... The... The... The... The... The... The... Wait, but that's not it. It goes on a little bit longer, right? It goes on way longer than that. I just noticed, by the way, the extras in the back, while he's like, you know, kicking

someone over here, behind him, the extras aren't trying to get him with their various weapons. They're just raising them up and down. There is a number of scenes I noticed where the Village of the Craziest people are looking like straight into lens. They're looking like, well, they're crazy. They don't take direct, they don't take direction. It's pretty special.

It's like, it's like, oh, we're in Romania, or wherever we shot this piece of garbage. Um, why don't we just, uh, is there like a home for absolutely destroyed, mentally people? Um, can we dress them up like monsters? Maybe they shot it in the, in the psychiatric ward there. I would believe it. Wherever they shot it, it's cold,

because you could see their breath in every scene. And Samir is shirtless riding a horse, and his horse, it's like iron, true grit. Like the horse has. Shooting out steam like a train. I felt bad for Samir. I want to say the thing about that pommel horse scene is he spends a lot of time not even doing kicking, just kind of getting revved up for, like, almost like a motor going, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go Right. In the alley. In the alley. But here's a weird thing about how it's going.

I thought too, it's like they didn't have a bunch of poles so that it looked like that was part of what was going on. Yeah, I just won. It's just one pole. And again, they didn't even try it like, they didn't put like a shirt on it. They could have like ripped this shirt off. Oh cool, this is like, I know. You know, like again, put a horse to it. Untie the horse, slap it away, get it. Like no, they don't even try. I have a question, a legit question.

When he says to the con, Mel Brooks, hey, my father came and played the game, what happened to him? Is that the first we're understanding that his father played the game or did that happen earlier? No, the first scene, the very first scene. It comes up earlier. Oh it did, okay, I guess that for some reason. Well by the way, the pictures he's looking at in that first scene, especially the one

of Sameer, is a production still. It is absolutely staged like movie production still. He learns there that his father played the game and his whereabouts are unknown. And so that was recently? Because the, played the game and he his whereabouts are unknown and so that was recently I Because the because well there is the father and see my look the same like when he was winning the Olympics His dad was playing the game and getting killed got it. I think that's what you're led to believe But but he's not going in to save his father No, I'm going in to get a military base put into this country But his dad was sent first to probably do that as well.

I'm sure, but like... It seems for him, in my mind, that like if he finds out what happened to his dad, great. You know? But no, there's no mystery. But it's not... There's no mystery. His dad didn't disappear.

Is this... He was killed playing the game. No, but he doesn't know that. But then when his dad rescues him, I don't mean to be... I don't mean to spoil. No, there's no spoilers. But at him, I don't mean to spoil. No, there's no spoil if we don't.

But at the end of Village of the Crazies, he's about to get... He's in a very bad situation where he's gonna get killed, and then a ninja comes along and helps him out of the situation, and the ninja is his father. Yes. And then he's like, Dad, what's up? And then he goes, I knew you'd come, John. Really?

And then immediately, and then immediately the father is killed. Well, well, yeah. He's shot with an arrow. But as we know, arrows don't do a lot of damage. I mean, it's great. Like, again. And he doesn't seem to have bothered by it. No.

When his father gets shot by the arrow Cabot is like doesn't even because he already grieve the already went through the Okay, this dude is a fucking robot He is like he is 100% I've said this before on the spectrum He has no concept of human emotions, but No, I would say, he cares more about Gomez than about his father. Look, look. We see him more in Gomez and Dad gets shot, he's like,

no, we do not know what his relationship was like. But again, as a screenwriter, why bring back that Dad didn't give any information. Nope. He didn't give him any pieces of advice, didn't give him a weapon, nor did he explain what he's been doing in Parmesan. Like yeah, I'm alive and I just figured I'd hang. I'd hang here and wait. Like to what end was he working on something? Did he get the village of the crazy people to become an army? He's like I've been working with the 20s, we're

gonna overthrow the... Nope. He's like I found've been working with the 20s. We're going to overthrow the, nope. He's like, I found a ninja outfit. I thought I'd save you. I'm just waiting. Uh-oh, my back hurts. What is it, arrow? Uh-oh. The most disturbing thing is that when he does

complete the games, he rides back into town on his horse with his girlfriend and his into town on his horse with his girlfriend and his dad's on another horse. Dead. No, he's not dead. Yes, he is dead. I think that the idea is that he's brought his father back and that his father's going to live.

And he didn't bring back Gomez. And Gomez is like mega dead. I thought he was dead. His dad is slept over. I thought Samir was gonna be on the other horse and it would be like, this is who, I killed Samir. But it wasn't Samir, it was the father and I'm thinking the father's gonna go to the hospital.

I thought, see, I thought too, did anybody else feel like Samir's death was really uneventful? Yes! Like I thought that showdown was gonna be like Samir's death was really uneventful? Yes! Like I thought that showdown was gonna be like, like roadhouse level throat rip. Yeah! Nope, it's like, ah, kick, kick, I've got you now, crack.

Back, done. Most pile of autumn leaves. Actually no, I thought it was event, well, it's the moment where he really has to call on, he really has to call on Jim Cotta to get through that fight. Right, you're right. He did have to do this. Because if he just fights Samir, just brawn and whatever,

he's gonna lose, but then he kind of becomes Jim Cotta. And then he's like, Well, how would you describe, what is Jim Cotta to you? We talked about it. So when does he become Jim Cotta? I need to know. During the fight with Samir. Do you feel like there's a moment that you's like, how would you describe, what is Jim Cada to you? We talked about it. When does he become Jim Cada? I need to know. During the fight with Samir. Do you feel like there's a moment that you're like,

oh, he just, Yes, you feel like it's when he gets in with his, when he crosses his legs over and grabs his neck. I don't know, I mean, well, no, before that, he's losing the fight. You guys know what I'm talking about? He's losing the fight and then he's like, because he was losing the fight to Samir and he's like,

how am I gonna beat Samir? I can't beat him this way. I need Jim Cota to win this fight. And Jim Cota is... Is Cartwheels into Karate. Got it. Yeah, I get it. I will say, I will ask one other question of you guys.

Did you think that the movie was going to continue after they rode that horse back in the town? I thought there might be a moment or two. Maybe, maybe it didn't. This was the most abrupt ending that has ever happened. It was shocking. Like, I really, again, like. That's why I really don't think that that father's alive.

Because I think if he was, they would have cut to him and he would have like moved around and like something. Right, right. By the way, why would he? Why would he bring his father back dead? Well, he wants to bury the body. He wants to bury the body. Look how happy he is.

His father is within feet of him, a corpse. But basically they ride into town and then the movie just frees his frame and goes, in 1985, the first early warning Earth station was placed in Parmesan for the US Star Wars defense program that is That is it the movie is over Why is there that exciting as a viewer like oh, yeah way to go USA? Why is there a double space between Star Wars and defense program?

Is that a subtle kind space between Star Wars and Defense Program? Is that a subtle kind of like Star Wars? Hey, you ready to walk out Star Wars? But I took it as like it was almost saying that it was real like at the end of like Aaron Brokovich or something where they're like Aaron Brokovich toppled these corporations, da-da-da. It's like, this was the most bullshit, weird story point. And they're acting like we even remembered that that was even. That was the goal. It's like the end of Argo, where the real people show up or whatever.

It's like, the real guys are going to show up and be like, this was based on me. Yeah. Like, we never needed this to begin with. No. Not one bit. Early warning, Earth Station. I'm just reading it again. This is what he fought for the entire movie.

Was an early warning. And that is a good thing, right? I mean, it's really relatable. It's really fun. Let's go out to the audience here, see what kind of questions they have. What kind of questions they have. What kind of questions they have. Oh a lot of hands, a lot of hands, a lot of hands. Alright I'm gonna go to this guy here first. Alright sir, first you have to say your name, do a sound effect of a punch, a

kick or whatever and then ask your question. Nico, whack! Great. At the scene when they release the convicts to go into the game, Kurt Thomas and others are going to observe on horseback. When they leave, they totally destroy a random civilian with a horse. Do you think it's deliberate do you think it's deliberate or that person actually fucking died? But they say, a real person gets trampled by a horse. Well, but Kurt Thomas says we can't just leave him there and they say, if you go get him, they'll kill you.

No, that's a different person. That's a different person. Okay, so they released the prisoners. What this guy's talking about is they released the prisoners and all of the villagers are like, yay, let's go watch the thing. And our guys are on horseback and one of the horses tramples a real person.

Oh, that really happened in real life? It must have happened in real life, yes. And it has to be an extra. Or it's the best stunt in the movie. Because I watched that and I think I rewound it. And honestly, it does look Kurt's face. I mean, he couldn't have acted it, I guess is what I'm saying. I think it really happened.

All right, here we go. Got a question back here. Your name, your best sound effect, and your question. My name's Ashley. Those are the leaves that they walk on that are so frickin freaking loud in this movie. And actually, I just wanted to, you mentioned Enter the Dragon. Can we just talk about how this is the same director as Enter the Dragon?

What? I did know that, yes. He is the same director. This guy went from Bruce Lee to Kurt Thomas. And here's the thing that I was gonna talk about before. They slow down kicks. So like Bruce Lee is so quick, you gotta slow down kicks, because he's so fast.

Here, you can see them, and slowing them down makes them progressively less impressive. In the slow-mo whole thing, the slow-motion scene is mostly just running. There's very the slow-mo whole thing, the slow-motion scene is mostly just running. There's very little slow-mo fighting. Well, the slow-mo kick was when he gets on top of that bridge

and he tosses those two dudes off, who also in slow-mo go, whoa, whoa, whoa. All right, your question over here, your name, your best sound effect, and your question. My name is Javi. Wow. Good. Thank you. And so my question is at the banquet they introduce the Village of the Crazies, generations of people criminally insane. So they say that they're cannibals. Why don't we ever

see them eating anybody? Hold on. I think we got an answer about that face. That face is definitely a human face. Just as I wanted. And you think the rest of the person was eaten? Yeah, absolutely. I like that. I like that. Wait, but you're right though. Why... Well, look, why? Why they set up everything and it never pays off?

Why didn't they have the crazies eat thorg instead of having the pigs eat thorg? Because the pigs learned it from watching the crazies. Here's the reality. The reality is nothing makes sense in this movie until you get to the village of the crazies because then everything's allowed to not make sense. That's when this movie starts making sense.

Okay, your name, your sound effect, and your question. Okay, Winona. Good. What is it? That's what the knives make when they land in the wood. So you know that part where Thor, like, so in the game, I guess the ninjas are chasing you, and if you caught by the ninjas, you die.

So why does Thor waste so much time trying to kill the Asian guy during the race? Okay, Thorg hates Asians. That's the only reason why he's there. Who knows? I also had a thought about this too, which was when the when the game starts, they all take off running, but it's not based on time. Nope.

It's a good time. No, but I would assume that I know nobody's won the game in 900 years, but I would assume that only one person could out of this crap, but my way is my guess is if no one won in 900 years, let's take it slow, Sirpreka. Paul, I thought that they got a head start on Samir and his men. And that's why they're running is because Samir and his men, because there was a moment way early in the movie where they kill someone. One of the ninjas kills a guy trying to climb up a mountain, and then they kill someone. One of the ninjas kills a guy trying to climb up a mountain and then they

kill him and then Samir says kill him and he kills another ninja not the guy. Oh yeah. And they're like why'd you do that? Because he broke the rules. And then when Kurt Thomas sees the rules being broken he's like hey he broke the rules. But what it tells them is that they take the rules of the game very seriously. But when Samir is breaking them, not so seriously. Well that's the thing is Samir decides to, it's a coup, where he tries to overthrow Mel Brooks and take rest control of the country from him.

And the thing is, he's now going to go and hunt the guys. He's breaking the rules of the game right But then the flag ninjas who are they? Allegiant like where's their allegiance? Oh just to me They are all just because they try and attack the Mel Brooks later on and when Mel Brooks is asked by his daughter Why did you let you know your aid have this much. Mel Brooks' answer is for security reasons. Yeah.

Did anybody else feel like Thorg was like a returning champion? Yes. Everybody seemed to know Thorg. Everybody's money seemed to be on Thorg. And it seemed like we were setting up some sort of a competition between each other. What if people want to go see Catching Fire,

and this is what played. This is like, that was it. That was it. Jennifer Lawrence introduces it. I would love it if they, she was just CGI inserted into this movie. Just like, Katniss Everdeen. That's why there's so many arrows. She's like, oh no, where's PETA? And it's just Thorg being like, rawr.

Okay. Your name, your sound effect, what your sound effect is and your question, go. My name's Steve and my sound effect is, what the? And that's just every other noise the crazy made. And am I the only one that noticed that the flag dynches looked like a divo in the Whippet music video?

Good point, good point. I like that. Have a seat. At a certain point I was like, oh, these aren't ninjas at all. They don't act, they don't do much ninja stuff. No, I think that they got like discount ninja costumes, but they, like, it was like, we ordered the ref costumes, but we got all these ninja costumes. I put them on, put them on. I feel like it's the producer being like, put them in fucking ninja outfits. Well, they're not ninjas.

We have even talked about one of the best moments in the movie, which is when one of the flag ninjas watches. I think it's so crazy. Thord killed the Asian guy and then he put the Asian guy and then the flag slowly drops. I couldn't figure that out. Was that guy was his flag representative of the Asian dude? No, he was just... Whoever was inside that ninja costume was horrified. He was like, whoa, I've seen some fucked up shit. He's like, honestly, I know I'm supposed to keep this flag up and all, but what the fuck just happened? But Thorg is out here fucking wasting dudes.

The sad moment for the flag guy. Uh, okay, your name, your sound effect question. Here we go. The sad moment for the flat guy. Okay, your name, your sound effect question. Here we go. My name is Chris and that's when the SI hits the table. Good. Okay. This is really important.

The title of the movie, Jim Cotta, that is not the proper fusion of gymnastics and karate. What is? the proper fusion of gymnastics and karate? What is? Gym... Kate? Gym Kate. I like that. Sounds like a really delicious coffee drink. Oh, I'm sorry.

Sorry. Oh, you have the right answer. Oh, God. All right. Here we go. Okay. I looked it up. It says that.

She looked it up. It's a noun and it's plural for a system of basic body positioning and movement exercises as in karate or judo. Kata. Alright, so that's something. That was something. We got it. Alright, who has a good research question? Who has someone who's like, I can't leave tonight, then until I bring this fact to light. Alright, ooh, good, all right, I like this.

Your hands been up your hands up. I'm going to both of you, because you both kept your hands up. Here you go. Your name, your sound effect, your question, go. All right, my name is David, my sound effect is. And that's every kick in the movie. Got it. And my question is, all right,

it's established that the princess's mother is from Indonesia. No one has been in the country for 900 years. How did she meet the king? How did the Indonesian mother get there? How did the queen meet the king? Well, wait, you're saying that people can't go to the country?

Everyone who goes to the country has to compete in the game. I think the king. Oh, yeah. He's the king, though. But has he left? And as I've heard, it's good to be the king? You fucking nerds. This is you out of your hand.

I have a feeling the king was away on a business trip to Indonesia, met this beautiful woman, I mean, 100% she was sold to him. We know that that's what happened. Sexual slavery is how she came to be there. Your name, your sound effect, your question. Here we go. My name is Mike, and my sound effects is,

it was like every time he did that back flip, he just, I don't know why that made that sound. He did hit himself. And so, my question is, when they were going inside the Bazaar and the guy who looked like Manzook is up there, throws a- How dare you. And he throws some liquid on him.

Like water at him. And you don't know if it's come or if it's- Hey man. Hey guy. Wow. Hey fella. So far, too. If I was a flag, then the two red flags have gone up over here. Yeah. So your first thought is that guy filled a cup full of come and just threw it on them. You're a fucking weirdo guy. Here we go. Here we go. Where's it coming? I'm feeling more unsafe over here. Finish it.

Okay. And here's the vote. And then the guy next to him said, hey, don't want to start anything. You know, there's a lot of anti-American things. And then boom, shot with an arrow. And then Kurt Thomas runs the other way and leaves the princess and everything. Yeah.

Why? Again, the- Is this a riddle? Is your question a riddle, sir? Oh, you're the worst! Last question, worst question. His question was an interesting one in that why would Kurt Thomas chase after the killer instead of protecting the rest of the people

that are clearly in danger. I also want to talk about that one thing when he gets that come throwing on him. He says, I guess that's it for the nightlife. Again, not again, maybe a spectrum response. And I guess not. These are not. These are lines that were written for the movie. He's not. It's not like he's improvising.

He's not improvising. Like he's like, oh, I guess this is the line I have to say now. And then he says nonsense like that. Yeah. Here we go. Your name, sound effect question. My name's Connor. My sound effect is, that's every spear throw.

Nice. It's like every five minutes. That was a good one. Thank you. Really good. I had a question about the props in this movie, specifically. Like, it seems every time there's a fight, like there's just a guy on the bottom of the screen

handing up props to people, like the fire extinguisher or, you know, an axe. Just they come out of nowhere. It's kind of like those old, like, LucasArts games that you played as a kid where you would have like a million things in your backpack, but never any signs of having that. It's like, I'm in Maniac Mansion and I have a skeleton. Where are you carrying this? It's just being pulled out. I want to talk about set design

and one thing too. The guy who's holding the princess hostage at one point has three axes on the wall in a crest and then right next to that crest is just a loan axe on the wall in a crest. And then right next to that crest is just a loan axe on the wall as well. Just a lot of axes. It's like, what's some axes here? Is there, all right, let's see, one more question, one more question, let's see. Who's gonna have a good question?

I can't tell by people's faces because sometimes the more excited, the more, man, we'll say here, what's your question? You don't look excited about it, so let's see, maybe it's gonna be good. Your name, your special effect, your sound effect, and your question. Do you want me to stand up? You want to, sure.

All right. Alison, my sound effect is nothing, which is the sound of the hawk. And... I knew it. We got a winner here. And my question is, I don't know if I should be posing... I knew it. We got a winner here. My question is, I don't know if I should be posing. Let's, everyone. We can all hear it.

Okay. Yeah, so my microphone's wrecked. So, basically, when the princess comes to train, what's his name and the cat skills, was she like, rented for the weekend? Yeah, you're right. Like that was my question too. Why was the princess there? Could she not get back home? Well, the second part of my question is like, did she also help Gomez? No. She's only, she's helping them train, she's helping the Americans train their entry. Why? Why did she give a shit about Star Wars? And why isn't she helping them train the Americans? Why? Why did she give a shit about Star Wars? And why isn't she She's helping the Americans train. Why?

But what why did she give a shit about Star Wars and why isn't she? Why does she my question because because of the 20s I'm serious. So she's a part of it. I'm serious because she's Because she's yeah because she's in with the 20s, and the 20s are looking towards America to help bring Parma Stan into the 20th century. That's what I... I mean, that's what I think. Yeah, pretty good.

Because I mean, I guess the question is if she helps Gomez win, what the fuck is Gomez gonna ask for? Does it help the 20s at all? I would like to see what... I would love to have just seen, like, at the beginning, you know, when the... Before the game started, they'd step up like, I'm Kurt Thomas, and my request is this.

You know, the next, like, my name is Gomez, and I would like a subway sandwich. And then, like, you know, I would love to have seen everyone's war war all their requests. Because why would you compete in this game? Like, Kurt Thomas has a very strong reason. But I can't imagine. Not really. Well, to put a military.

I would argue it's not a very strong reason at all. To put a military base there. To risk your life in an unwinnable game. I agree with that. But at least he has a request. How about diplomatic relations? You have the princess there. Oh, that's so out of style, man.

But the princess says to him, you're going to die. And he says, no, I'm going to win. He tells her that. I think it would be amazing if someone made a sequel to this movie called The 20s that was about the 20s that was really good and totally dramatic and had an amazing cast and was really well directed and then you just let people find out that this is the movie it was based on.

It would be great if you in that 20s movie if they like you had a younger actor like a James Franco or whatever playing Kurt Thomas and he has a very small part almost like a cameo and like oh and that was a great day when he came back on the horse you know and then you you know you just have this like one moment of them a fleeting glimpse of ah and then it goes forward because I would like to I would be amazing I was just like this weird sort of detail that this really good movie happened to have been based on Jim Cotta and that's just Or what if what if you did like something a little like if you did a movie that was about like a college-age kid

Who does like semester abroad in Parmesan? And so it's like a modern-day Parmesan story and you there's no mention of Jim Cotta Right except for like at the very like there's a couple of very slight things. Like the ruler has been overthrown. Maybe you get this actress to play in the present ruler. But like otherwise it's just a story about a young kid on a semester abroad. Right.

I have a version of this movie. The 20s have been successful. They've mixed the old and the new. So much so that new towns are being built up in the old towns, a group of kids, their house is being taken over, they gotta move out. It's a modern day goonies. These kids from Parma-Stah and they're like, we're gonna have one last weekend and they find the old game, they find the old game of death.

And they accidentally are falling through the old game of death. They go to the town of the crazies, which somehow still exists. They find treasure and they save their small town. I think that modern day Goonies in Parmesan would be great to find the old courses and everything. I guess what we're talking about here

is everybody just go online and start pitching your versions of how you would make a sequel and or a parallel movie to this movie. Post it on our Facebook page. I just want to see a prequel that was like his journey to winning the gold medal. Right. Final thoughts, would you recommend it? In its insanity and for the gymnastics,

it's really fun to watch. I do. All right. I do. I had one scene that I, we didn't talk about that I loved or that I, well, I liked it, I was let down a little bit, which is when they're climbing over the ropes course

in the very final game sequence, and the first guy who goes over it Might have been Gomez he like Uses his legs and his hands and then you think each person when when it when it gets to Cabot You think he's gonna do Jim Cota on the ropes. Yeah, but he doesn't He just does his arms like everybody else He just does his arms like everybody else. He, the Jim Cotay is very, I don't even really, I guess I don't even really understand it, because sometimes he's using, he does use his fists sometimes too, right? Yeah, he boxes too.

Very rarely. Okay. Very rarely. It's really just, it's a lot of footwork. Jason, do you recommend it? A hundred percent. Well, that is Jim Codd. We normally do a section of the show called Second Opinions. Unfortunately, this movie. Okay, this is an interesting fact about this movie.

This movie was was re released because Amazon, like there was a voting base. I don't know how to describe it, I don't have it here, but there was a contest, like what movie would you like to see our studio re-release and Jim Cota won that? That is the reason, this is recent in 2007. So that is the only reason why it is even out in an available way. For many, many years, this was not able to be gotten.

So it won this contest. So on Amazon, all the five star reviews are like, fucking, the movie's dumb, five stars. There's no earnest. There's no earnest five star reviews. And they're not even that funny. So I opted not to read it. Jason, I wanted to do this.

Last time we were on the show, you improvised a song, and you said, well, I hope people make that into our second opinions theme. Here are two of the finalists, or not finalists. Oh, there's multiples? There's two. Well, we'll listen to them really quickly. There were only eight seconds.

Here we go. So, we'll listen to them really quickly. They're only eight seconds. Here we go. Pretty good. Pretty good. Pretty good. Pretty good. Pretty good. Pretty... I'll tell you what, Internet, you can do better. Well, thank you guys for coming out.