How Did This Get Made? - New York Ninja LIVE!
Episode Date: November 3, 2023Paul, June, and Jason break down the insanity that is New York Ninja—an action movie shot in 1984 that wasn't released until 2021 when the unedited footage was found without audio and completely rec...onstructed. LIVE from the Count Basie in New Jersey, the crew discuss the villain eating his own rat tail, the $100 special effects budget, the news reporter who constantly gets abducted, ninjas on roller skates, and so much more. Plus, they debate with the audience about the most amazing wig of all time... or was it? HDTGM will be in Chicago & Minneapolis from Nov 8-11th! Go to hdtgm.com for tix and info.Follow Paul on Letterboxd: letterboxd.com/paulscheer/HDTGM Discord: discord.gg/hdtgmPaul’s Discord: discord.gg/paulscheerCheck out Paul and Rob Huebel live on Twitch (www.twitch.tv/friendzone) every Thursday 8-10pm ESTSubscribe to Unspooled with Paul and Amy Nicholson here: listen.earwolf.com/unspooledSubscribe to The Deep Dive with Jessica St. Clair and June Diane Raphael here: www.thedeepdiveacademy.com/podcastCheck out The Jane Club over at www.janeclub.comCheck out new HDTGM merch over at https://www.teepublic.com/stores/hdtgmWhere to find Jason, June & Paul:@PaulScheer on Instagram & Twitter@Junediane on IG and @MsJuneDiane on TwitterJason is not on Twitter
Transcript
Discussion (0)
How did this get made is going to be in Chicago and Minneapolis, Minnesota this week.
That's right.
Come check us out.
Go to hdtgm.com to find out the four movies two nights in each spot.
It is going to be great.
We're almost sold out in both places, but there are still seats available and you're not
going to want to miss it.
I don't even know what the outlying cities are, but get there, bend, that bend.
I don't know, South Bend.
Anyway, get there, anyway,
where you can't go to httgm.com
and you'll find out the movies
and how to get tickets.
We'll see out on the road.
It's 1984 and New York is overrun by plutonium killers,
henchmen who chew on their ponytails,
shirtless marsh fishing in I'm just a fruit, then we can't be staying alive
They call me the bad ass and he's on the line
Fricking eight feet, man, it's cosy cool as ice
Cos' a bad jiff, wonny looking kind of night
I'm just gonna get you in the middle, we'll chase him, let's get you late
Don't let's make the show out of monkey shots in the pain
There's just a bunch of movies, why be making it great
Here's a real question on the out of this kid page
For a long time
Hello people of Earth, and hello people of Central Jersey!
We're alive! That's a Count Basie theater in Red Bank
for a movie that was made for New Jersey.
New York Ninja.
Let me tell you a little bit about New York Ninja.
New York Ninja is a movie that was shot in 1984, but came out in 2021.
It is about a man whose wife is killed on the day she finds out she's pregnant.
And then he goes on to find the killers, I think, maybe.
And stop an international prostitution ring that may or may not be just models in
the city. Again, I'm not quite sure of the plot. I know New York is prominent, I
know ninjas are prominent, and I know there's a New York ninja, but the rest is
all up in the air.
Here to break it down for you even more are my two co-hosts.
Please welcome to stage Mr. Jason Manzooka. What's up, jerks? How we doing?
Central Jersey?
Oh shit!
Oh shit!
That's right!
New York Ninja, a movie that makes total sense that I just found out was released in 2021.
What are you talking about?
That blew my entire mind back there.
This movie, like the Great Miami Connection, was found.
Give it up for the Miami Connection.
Come on.
It was found many years later without the soundtrack.
So a director came in and decided to put it together
without knowing what the script was.
Wait a minute, for this movie?
Yes.
Wait a minute.
Wait a minute.
OK, we got it.
Before you even get into this, get you and out here.
Let's do this.
I got it.
Here she is.
Now.
You, dad, right here.
I had to come out.
What?
What are you saying, Paul, with your words?
You're saying that someone found this movie
without sound?
Is that what I heard?
Wait, first of all.
Are we doing all standing?
Cause I'll stand.
I'll do this show on my feet.
The first ever standing show.
First of all, June, how are you?
I'm okay. How are you are you? I'm okay.
How are you Paul?
I'm fine. Thank you for asking.
Yes, this movie was found.
A found?
Found.
So this is really when they say,
when they say it's found footage, this movie is found footage.
I'm not ready to sit yet.
I'm not either. I feel unsettled.
Yeah, I need to.
I'm just picturing someone.
It needs to be on my toes.
Coming across this at a yard sale and being like,
I don't know, I'll throw dialogue on this.
That's what I'm saying.
OK, so I'll tell you a little bit more.
If we're going to continue standing for those of you who
are listening.
You're out of the light now, though.
You're in the dark.
All right.
So a band-in footage from 1984 was a bandit?
A bandit.
Like, now what?
You were bad for the movie.
So someone adopted this movie?
Uh-huh.
Just like that little orphan.
Just like the little orphan in the film,
someone rescued and went fishing with it
to make a hole again.
I thought for sure, this was just,
because obviously the whole thing is ADR looped
to the entire thing.
Yes. I thought for sure it was just recorded
without sound for expense reasons.
Well, do you know what I thought, actually?
So, I mean, no, we have to sit down with some point.
Never. I'm just not ready to.
We're on our feet for you, Josie.
For you, balcony.
So I actually thought at one point, so our main character, whoever that person is, the
New York Ninja.
Yes, the New York Ninja himself, it appeared to me at one point that he is the sound person.
Yes.
The sound technician for the New York,
I witness news news.
So then I thought, wow, was that actor playing a sound person
and also the movie sound person?
Wow.
And so now there's no sound.
I would be like that.
But it sounds like I need to be more bizarre.
Go ahead.
Well, I can give you a couple details.
That actor, John Lue, who is playing John Lue, an employee of the New York City television
station, wrote and directed this film.
But what does not do the voice of John Lue, that is done by Don, the dragon Wilson.
The reason why the end credits only have as the voice of is because they can't find the actual actors.
Wait, the actors who were in the movie?
Yes, all the credits are.
Because they've all been disappeared.
What happened?
This, I think, 1984 to now, people may have passed on.
Everyone from 84?
Yeah.
There's no children in this movie.
You think all of the I Heart New York Ninja kids are RIP?
And by the way, if they are, if the entire cast of New York Ninja is dead by 2021 or whatever you said is what, then like, let's start an investigation.
That's a documentary.
Let's absolutely appoint a special guest
until something happens.
The very first, how did this get me a docu-series?
Where we investigate?
Yes.
We're investigating this.
Fish and deaths of everyone in this movie.
Now I will also say that at all of their gravesites,
there were traces of plutonium.
Oh, from the plutonium killer?
Yes.
No, so here's the thing.
The original footage was in film reels.
It ran about six to eight hours in length.
Thank God.
And we're going to watch it right now.
Lights!
And they included no actor credits. so they don't know who a lot
of these actors are.
So that's why they're like, what are you saying?
What?
What?
And I'll give you a couple details.
The abandoned footage was eventually acquired by-
I love that you keep using the word abandoned, as if it was found on the side of the road.
I know.
Here's what I want to know.
Because what I think kind of happened
is somebody just never cut it together.
That doesn't mean it was abandoned.
No.
It was left in a cardboard box at a fire station.
If you remember, Miami connection was found on eBay.
I can tell some of us are sitting down.
Some of us are going to stand up.
No, that's fine.
The rest of the night, we're going to be up and down.
I can tell.
All right, so when the abandoned, left alone footage,
whatever you want to call it was found,
there was no audio, storyboards, or scripts for the film.
It was reconstructed by a new director called Curtis M. Speeler.
The Dub Dialogue was recorded by new actors. And what he likes to say is,
he suspects, the director suspects, that Lou may have been unable to complete the film
before production shut down because it doesn't feel like it was finished. The A.H.H.H.H.H.H.H.H.H.H.H.H.H.H.H.H.H.H.H.H.H.H.H.H.H.H.H.H.H.H.H.H.H.H.H.H.H.H.H.H.H.H.H.H.H.H.H.H.H.H.H.H.H.H.H.H.H.H.H.H.H.H.H.H.H.H.H.H.H.H.H.H.H.H.H.H.H.H.H.H.H.H.H.H.H.H.H.H.H.H.H.H.H.H.H.H.H.H.H.H.H.H.H.H.H.H.H.H.H.H.H.H.H.H.H.H.H.H.H.H.H.H.H.H.H.H.H.H.H.H.H.H.H.H.H.H.H.H.H.H.H.H.H.H.H.H.H.H.H.H.H.H.H.H.H.H.H.H.H.H.H.H.H.H.H.H.H.H.H.H.H.H.H.H.H.H.H.H. finished. The E-hour cut.
No.
They wanted to maybe shoot some new scenes,
but he said, no, he insisted on only using
the original footage claiming,
if my job had been to be an editor in 1984,
what would I have done?
And I was very aware of trying to maintain
what I thought the intended spirit or tone of the production was.
I knew there was a fair amount of intentional or unintentional humor to the movie, but I tried
to take the project seriously and respectfully to the original source material and he would
watch the actor's lips and would try to dub to it unonly when he couldn't read the original
dialogue then he would
rewrite lines.
Wow!
That is!
Now, Mike, is this the best movie that we've ever watched?
I'm joking to say!
That makes me love this movie even more, and spoiler alert, I love this movie!
I made two!
It's a great movie, I'll give you a couple more details
Keep in mind just for one brief moment if you will Paul keep in mind yesterday We watched Jonathan Livingston Seagull
Yeah
At which point I tried to drown myself in the Hudson
So this was a I took so few notes for that show last night, and I took so many notes.
I have five pages.
I basically transcribed the whole movie,
just because I was like, I can't believe this is happening.
I can't wait for plutonium killer, gigantic boobs.
What is this movie?
Here are the details that we know
from some of the surviving crew members.
The crew members are dead too?
And also, I don't love that you're using surviving as if everybody who worked on this movie,
as if this movie to work on it was as if it's the ring.
Oh, or whoa, whoa, whoa. What's that, Jerse?
He said, because of the plutonium,
maybe they actually had real plutonium on set.
So, I would love that.
Wait, do we know?
Okay, sorry, go ahead.
Well, I'll tell you a couple things.
So, the film Special Effects artist, Carl Moreno,
said, if we had zero resources,
he estimates the Special Effects budget was $100.
Most of which he spent most of which he spent on the plutonium killer's melting face,
not all, not 85 bucks.
Then this movie is the best movie we've all ever seen.
They did a great job.
I'm sorry, so are you saying that the director who found the abandoned footage, the orphan
footage, that that director never contacted the star and writer of the movie?
I believe that John Liu and somebody can correct me if I'm wrong, an actor in 20 karate films
from Taiwan and Spain is passed.
No.
Okay.
There we go.
I suspect it.
Because what?
He lives on a river.
Why do you know that he lives on a river?
He lives on a river in Vietnam.
I was there last month. I had a great time with him.
Just in case you didn't hear it about any monster revealed that John Lewis not dead he lives
on a river. On a river. Let's be honest, not down by a river. Yeah.
On a river. Like for Farley's famous character. Let's be clear, that is deeply suspect information.
Simply because it came from a Jersey balcony.
So, I don't know why.
Most everybody up there is shirtless with a 40 tape to their hand.
So, I mean, that's what we're working with.
So he was alive when the footage was a dot-shot.
And so he just didn't have anything, I guess he was on the river and they couldn't contact him.
I don't know Vietnam River specifics.
I'm sure that people in the last looks episode will kind of tell us all the details that
we want to know about John Lute.
But, we've, oh, I know you already said this, but we repeated just because I've forgotten.
What year was the abandoned movie discovered?
That was the movie shot.
That's when it was shot. Was it also discovered then?
That would feel like it.
To see, get it together. 84, I know. Filming, filming began.
Forty-stape to both ends. Filming began in late 1984, and the film was released by vinegar syndrome in 2021.
So I imagine at one point, this pulled out of the archives somewhere because there were
ads for this film in a trade magazine in 1984.
It was shelved after 21st century distribution corporation went bankrupt and sold its assets.
So somewhere for a long time, there were eight hours of footage sitting on a shelf.
Someone found it.
I wish we had access to all that footage.
Well, I will tell you that the one thing they were able to find was the rap song,
originally recorded for the film, and that actually plays over the end credits.
The rest of the music was from the Detroit band Voyager 3 who lists their
inspiration as vintage horror action in sci-fi films like John Carpenter which
makes them a perfect fit for this. So that's you know so this is a very is a
labor of love and I will say as much as I loved it,
knowing that it had no end,
and knowing that new dialogue was recorded,
it doesn't attempt to make any sense.
So much so that I found myself rewinding and going,
like, did I hear that?
Because the opening scene, we meet John Lew, who bumps into his wife on the street.
The whole movie, the whole movie, is stolen exterior shots.
They don't have any locations, they don't have any interiors.
When you watch the people watch the camera.
And every shot when there's another person.
The scene where all the,
the, the, one of the scenes where one of the street gangs
attacks two women and it's just absolutely a melee
of chaotic energy in the middle of the day,
in the background of the scene,
a woman is putting her laundry into her car.
When, oh, when John lose wife is,
needa, yes, when she is getting her throat slashed,
a woman walks up from the subway like, to do,
but I actually found that to make New York way more scary.
Yeah.
It seemed like it was like 7 a.m. on a Wednesday morning. And this woman was like,
Listen, every all of the violent crimes
happen in broad daylight.
Like it's noon.
And women are being lined up and ushered out of aware.
It is.
In the bright light of day in slips.
If there's so many slips in this movie,
there's so many slips there.
When he goes to talk to the police officer,
he doesn't go to a police station.
He doesn't go to a police cruiser.
He just walks along the Williamsburg,
most of this movie is shot in an abandoned lot
in Williamsburg.
Like truly, it's just like I'll pick his defense.
He's like, well, I'm a police officer,
so I don't know what's going on with you.
Well, as you're talking about that, I will say
the reason why we picked this movie for New Jersey is,
if you look closely at the police officers,
they have Hoboken Police Department on their badges. Hoboken Police Department
front and center, and yet it's New York Ninja.
But we have so much to talk about, but I just, because we're on the police officers and
their outfits, their costumes, their uniforms, I was so obsessed with the main cop's hat.
Yeah, great hat.
And I stared at it for so long.
I paused it, I looked at it.
If he turned around and I had like a rear shot of it,
I paused that to look at it again.
Because it seemed that he had taken a trucker's hat
that's meant to sort of sit atop the head.
And he had folded it in the middle
to sort of make a more like military style cap.
And I thought, well, did they not have did they not have a hat that fit his head?
And so he had to?
Who even was?
Was that a choice?
Yeah.
And again, that's what this movie left me with,
just like I don't understand a thing
and I wanna know so much more.
For example, for example, if you will,
indulge me while I read aloud the title card
that shows up the
first thing that starts in this movie.
1984.
Crime is at an all-time high.
Gangs of drug-doubt punks roaming the streets, praying on the innocent.
A rash of kidnappings involving young women has gripped the city with fear.
The citizens of New York are fed up.
The city needs hope. The citizens of New York are fed up. The city needs hope.
The city needs a hero.
There is not a single punk in this movie.
The street tuffs are all wearing bandanas around there
thighs like Chachi.
And one of them is dressed like a Halloween cowboy
at one point.
These are the people that you would put
in the deep background in the movie Warriors.
It was like, deep, like, yeah, yeah, you're on camera.
You know, it's like, we just need bodies.
And they all look, and I have a feeling
the reason why they're all wearing masks
is because they're the same actor over time, time but I'm even going to go one step further and say this, it doesn't
seem like the city's fed up.
No, as a matter of fact, it seems like business as usual.
Yeah, you're so right, Paul.
People are still so comfortable in this city walking around, warehouses and factories with no one around.
Oh, and they're just like, bam, bam, bam, bam, bam, bam, bam, bam, bam, bam, bam, bam, bam, bam, bam, bam, bam, bam, bam, bam, bam, bam, bam, bam, bam, bam, bam, bam, bam, bam, bam, bam, bam, bam, bam, bam, bam, bam, bam, bam, bam, bam, bam, bam, bam, bam, bam, bam, bam, bam, bam, bam, bam, bam, bam, bam, bam, bam, bam, bam, bam, bam, bam, bam, bam, bam, bam, bam, bam, bam, bam, bam, bam, bam, bam, bam, bam, bam, bam, bam, bam, bam, bam, bam, bam, bam, bam, bam, bam, bam, bam, bam, bam, bam, bam, bam, bam, bam, bam, bam, bam, bam, bam, bam, bam, bam, bam, bam, bam, bam, bam, bam, bam, bam, bam, bam, bam, bam, bam, bam, bam, bam, bam, bam, bam, bam, bam, bam, bam, bam, bam, bam, bam, bam, bam, bam, bam, bam, bam, bam, bam, bam, bam, bam, bam, bam, bam, bam, bam, bam, bam, bam, bam, bam, bam, bam, bam, bam, bam, bam, bam, bam, bam, bam, bam, bam, bam, bam, bam, bam, bam, bam, bam, bam, bam, bam, bam, bam, bam, bam, bam, bam, bam, bam, bam, bam, bam, bam, bam, bam, bam, bam, bam, bam, bam, bam, bam, bam, bam, bam, bam, bam, bam, bam, bam, bam, bam to slip away from his reporting crew so he can transform into the New York Ninja so they
can then be like, where are you?
You missed it.
Which is revealed very late.
Like the fact that John even works for the news is shocking.
Takaan.
Because it's like, it would be like the movie Superman, but we don't meet Clark Kent or know
that he has a job until like the last section
of the movie.
Oh, he's a reporter?
Oh, okay.
Like, when he was carrying the sound equipment, I, because at first I thought he was just
along with the news crew hunting down his wife's killer when, when his wife gets killed.
Before she gets a knife to the belly,
she's pregnant, by the way.
Not cool.
The way they slasher through it and she falls down the stairs,
like,
she falls down the stairs.
She falls down the stairs,
like someone who has arthritis trying to do stunts.
Like, I got it. She might have got it.
But she then does a full like,
jazz head roll, like a full dance move, which I love.
Love. She might as well have gotten,
it says, I will say this, it says if everybody in the movie
knew they would be dubbed by someone else,
20 plus years in the future.
Like, it's so shocking to me that that's not the case by someone else, 20 plus years in the future.
It's so shocking to me that that's not the case
because it makes so much more sense.
Their performances are so enormous
that they were like, well, we're gonna have to make it big
because we're not even recording sound.
We'll have to dub this all later.
I just want to play the opening scene
because just to the whole thing.
Tip one here.
Take a look at clip one.
Sorry, I'm late.
Happy birthday.
What is that?
Right pause.
What is that?
What is that?
What is he giving her?
Is it an ankle?
Is it a bell? A bell? What is that? Oh my gosh. What is that?
What is that?
What is that?
What is he giving her?
Is it an ankle?
A belt?
Is it a bracelet?
A necklace?
A belt?
A kumate belt?
I also want to know about the signs on the post behind them.
Let's dance, one says.
That feels like that was not art department.
No, no, there's no our department on this movie. So he comes, gives her a gift and then she's like,
okay, I got to go. So was the idea like, let's meet up on the street corner for
30 seconds. I can't be there long. Like, I didn't even understand because this
is, you can read their lips.
This is what they are saying.
Yes.
Happy birthday.
Here's your gift.
Gotta go.
Oh, I'm pregnant.
Yeah.
And then there's like, oh, one last thing.
I'm pregnant.
Goodbye.
After they plan on having a romantic dinner that night,
and the dinner,
romantic.
She's the dick Paul.
Well, romantic. romantic dinner that night and the dinner romantic well
Romantic honest to God if she saw that what that layout he had
She would happily be killed
Well, she escaped a worse fate
The romantic dinner
seems to be A birthday celebration for him. Unless he wanted to give her to Ninja Swords.
That's what I couldn't figure out.
Wait a second.
I thought it was his birthday.
No.
Because no, he reads a card she wrote to him.
On your birthday, you don't write a card to someone else.
Read it.
Wait, hold on.
Hold on.
Look.
Incredible.
Oh, it's not fair.
It's not fair.
Why?
Why? Why?
Why?
Why?
Oh!
The balloons and the balloon table, you know what I'm saying.
Oh, you know what?
Maybe I cut out that part where he does read a he reads a card
He reads a card and there's a fine
But I thought it was his I thought it was his birthday
And why destroy the frame photo the memory of this woman who was just murdered all of
All of these things are worth examining sure but talk, is he planning on giving her two swords
for her birthday?
That's all I want to know,
because I could get that out of my head
for the rest of the movie.
So here's the thing, I was also
fraught with this detail,
because that, that, that,
that tablespoon, that birthday dinner is
already set up so if it's I don't know because like if it's his birthday then
she just went to the rooftop of their apartment and left everything out there
in the morning and he walked into it. I think it's her birthday and he's set that up
for her because he says,
I'll see you later blah blah blah.
But why did she write him a card?
Who on earth knows?
Okay, so let's go one step further.
Opening scene, they meet up.
World Trade Center.
Opening shot of this movie, I was like, whoa.
Okay.
They opening scene, they was like, whoa. Okay.
They opening scene, they meet.
Happy birthday, I'm pregnant, see you tonight. She's murdered, minutes later.
We catch him on the roof, the news is found out,
which means he's been sitting
ketotonically all night long?
No, I don't think so.
I think this is, so I think he sees his wife
either during her lunch break or prior to work.
Sure.
Gives her the, whatever he gives her,
happy birthday.
I'm pregnant, see you later.
Great.
She then walks away and is stone-cold murdered.
Right.
Then what happens is we cut to the news director
and the woman in the wig who comes into the scene right here.
And they say, did you hear about John's wife, RIP?
We got to take care of him.
Let's take a helicopter, yes.
Uptown?
Let's take a helicopter to his house.
I couldn't figure that out.
I feel like what happened is John had access to a helicopter somehow, some way.
John had access to a helicopter.
There were going to be a small chair set.
There were going to be a small chair set.
There were going to be a small chair set.
There were going to be a small chair set.
There were going to be a small chair set.
There were going to be a small chair set.
There were going to be a small chair set.
There were going to be a small chair set.
There were going to be a small chair set.
There were going to be a small chair set.
There were going to be a small chair set.
There were going to be a small chair set.
There were going to be a small chair set. There were going to be a small chair set. There were going to be a small chair set. There were going to be a small chair set. There were going to be a small chair set. This movie, a man is hanging off a helicopter. That's right, to the air.
It was amazing.
That stunt on a budget of, I'm going to say $15 because I'm
waiting 85 for the mask is scarier than anything
Tom Cruise has ever done in addition to Bob.
Fully agreed.
That was a person.
I mean, that is...
Wigled.
And also, how do they get a permit for that?
Because I don't think they got one.
They didn't permit anything.
And you know how I know?
Because you revealed that it was shut in Hoboken, which in 1984 was a
lawless place. I have to say something important. Jason, I don't think what's her name, that character's
name, Randy. I don't think that was a way. Zoinks. Which is even crazier.
I think that that's hair.
I think it's all hair.
I think you're right.
I think it is.
Wow.
There's no makeup on this movie.
And I think she's like, I'm in a movie.
I'm going to get my hair to be the third postar of this film.
And it was.
Her hair ran away with this film.
I just had a thought.
Do you think the samurai swords were a present for the baby?
Ah!
If the framed picture was for her,
but the swords were for the baby eventually.
One baby gift.
That would be amazing because it would be like New
York Ninja and baby like a cop and a half kind of thing. Well that's kind of
where we end up a little bit. It does get like a mentee at a certain point.
They go fishing together in a speedo. Yep. I'm so hard to know though what
what else was in those eight hours because I would love to have known
What his history was as a ninja like where he learned about this and you know why this skill hasn't shown up till now
There's so many unanswered questions where does he'd go to get his ninja stars monogram?
Yes
Great question
Because they are monogrammed as New York Ninja.
So he definitely was at one point, had a plan.
It wasn't like New York Ninja returns.
No, his branding of himself was like on point
from the beginning.
He saw that and he actualized.
He saw that there was a hole in the market.
He saw the white space.
By the way, the city needs a vigilante.
I need to identify myself.
Can someone etch New York Ninja into these throwing stars?
Yeah, I feel like he bought them wholesale.
He got a great deal.
It would be like Batman putting like Batman on his battery.
There is a moment though where the boss of the news channel says, we're making these.
Like, they're making the news.
He's like, you can keep that one.
Why are you giving away merch?
Are you part of the system at this point?
I don't even know if it's merch.
I think it's evidence.
So, this is what's so crazy.
So one of the cops goes undercover at one point.
Incredible word.
It's immediately abducted.
She's like, what are you wearing?
She's like, I'm undercover.
They're like, bag overhead, goodbye.
By the way, the news reporter is abducted like 15 times. She can't walk
two steps with getting abducted. I mean, she is, you think you'd be a little bit more
aware of that? That's third or fourth time? Now that we're, you're a kid,
Do you need to stand up again? Oh God, it's just happening.
No, just be angry.
Just how many times that woman got abducted?
She's like, oh no, again.
It's like, you're her, you're just staying home. You're under like a self-imposed state,
or more in her, just like, yeah, but she doesn't.
She goes out.
She literally, she's lying down in the back of a car.
She's like, I gotta go home.
I gotta go home, I gotta get in a ducted.
She's like doing Broadway level of duchess.
She's like, I got a noon show, I got a seven o'clock show,
I gotta just take a nap before the next one.
You would be as if Rosanna Scotto got kidnapped
every single day.
When she's out with Jack, her cameraman, right?
Wait, that's her name, right?
Rosanna Scotto.
Okay, thank God.
I was like, I'm pulling this, but I don't know if I'm right.
When she is out, Randy.
Randy? Yeah.
When Randy's out with Jack, the cameraman,
and they're capturing all this footage,
and then the bad guys, the punks, start chasing them.
Jack is like, peace later.
He is like, lady, you're on your own.
She doesn't get 10 feet,
and he's on the roof of a building.
It's crazy.
He is so out of there.
And she's like, come on, guy.
She is a victim of, I believe, and this is what I was going to say a moment ago.
She is a victim of both sets of independent bad guys.
One are roaming gangs of street tubs
who just appear to want to beat, steal, kill, rape, pillage,
whatever they're up to.
Bernholz through newspapers.
And Bernholz through newspapers.
And then there is the plot that is the...
Okay.
Can we even try to break down this plot?
I will try.
So we have two top-tier villains, which are the...
The man who is revealed to be an interpol agent who's like,
talks like, they got a great guy to play him.
Yes.
It doesn't have an accent.
Although it's in the closing credits he's built as pale man. Pale man, great. And then they, he speaks to the plutonium killer
who wears sunglasses all the time has toxic touch. I'm not sure. But they want,
they want specific women abducted as per order by giving their headshots.
Headshots, which would make me think they were models, but what are those
abductions for? Interpol.
No.
Yes, so what?
Interpol.
Interpol is investigating an international prostitution ring.
But I think it's undercover like that cop lady.
Yeah, he's undercover.
He's the one who slips the marching knee like this.
Mm-hmm.
Oh yeah, he's drinking a martini in his car.
Oh, I see what you're saying.
So he's giving those headshots undercover.
OK, great.
And saying, get me these women and more.
And then the bad guy gives him head shots.
They're like, yeah.
What's so crazy about it?
I don't know why.
That power, that power dynamic.
I've been by the way, I've been in the center.
I've been in the center.
I've been in the center.
I've been in the center.
I've been in the center.
I've been in the center.
I've been in the center.
I've been in the center.
I've been in the center.
I've been in the center.
I've been in the center.
I've been in the center.
I've been in the center.
I've been in the center. I've been in the center. I've been in the center. I've been in the center. I've been in the center. One of the bad guys, one of the street thugs, was had two like dolls with him.
And he's squickably.
I go welcome back, Coddard doll.
They're like, there was two bad guys
spend a tremendous amount of time in that lot
in Williamsburg with the city in the background,
or maybe it's, oh, Bokeh, I'm not sure.
And the plutonium killer has, I have bad guys in cars.
One guy talks in slow-mo.
One guy talks in crazy chipper accent.
Driver eats ponytail.
The driver is my favorite character.
Yeah.
Incredible.
Me, too.
Incredible character.
I was going to say, at one point I was like, I won't put it was like is that Elijah would?
That, and I wish I wish for him that that was Elijah would. He looked so much like him and he was so
incredible and then his final fight sequence where he played the drunken... what was it called? It was the name of... Oh, Drunken Sword Style.
Like a...
Yes, when he did that.
It was just so compelling.
What I love about that, if anyone has ever worked in production, one of the hard things
about shooting exterior, locations is that you lose the light, which means that you start
a scene and the light goes down and it doesn't match and you're racing to finish it before you lose the light.
And in that final fight scene, they're like, we lost the light.
Like there are, it's day, it's night, it's dust.
That matter.
Things are happening.
And I will say the karate and the swordplay doesn't seem like it needed that much time.
You've probably got all that out in one take.
Totally.
Here's my question though about the Interpol Palman.
So he's undercover.
So in his undercover operation, he is
comfortable with putting, like, I
want to say it, it doesn't.
Women in chains for, I don't know how to talk.
Oh, no, no.
That's not him.
That's not him. That's not him.
That's the plutonium guy.
That's the other set of bad guys.
The other guy.
I don't think we ever see the plutonium killer
fulfill an order to the pale man.
See, basically the plutonium killer's like,
he wants 20 girls.
Well, we can't give him to a piecemeal.
We got to give it over all at once.
It's like, he's like doing a collection of them.
He's like, what can we kill him to?
What time can I kill him?
I'm still, right?
He keeps killing them himself.
Is that the deal?
No.
So this is what's so confusing.
OK, so I didn't realize that.
I thought that those girls were going to the pale man
and that that was part of his sting.
No, those girls are going to the pale man and that that was part of his sting. No, those girls are gonna go, no.
So the interpol guy is talking to the sunglasses guy to get him women because the sunglasses
guy can kidnap headshots.
Now I'm realizing headshots are probably from all the actors who audition for this movie.
So that's what he's using.
Rob probably. So he's like, I'll get you. You think the actors who audition for this movie. So that's what he's using. Rob, probably.
So he's like, I'll get you.
You think there were auditions for this movie?
They said that every morning a different, they would lose the crew every day.
So every morning they'd meet at the Howard Johnson's on 42nd Street.
And they're like, all right, so today I'm the sound guy.
I'm the, I'm, I'm stunts and sound guy, I'm the, I'm stunts, and I make up,
and they would just go off and shoot.
So, that is actually true.
It's in my notes, but so the plutonium guy,
he's XCIA, he's been exposed to plutonium,
his side hustle is capturing tons of girls and
selling them to the British man for prostitution purposes.
Okay, so that's his side hustle. His regular day-to-day job is just killing women, like having
sex with them. Well, I think the plutoniums and affidies yet Wait what?
Because so you think you think this is he's in a trafficking business
Yes, and maybe Jim Kapizel's gonna come in and save the day or something I
feel like
The so we see him with plutonium twice right Like, first he opens it up and he pretty much,
I called it like an orgasm box,
because he opened it up and he's like, ah, ah.
Is that what you look like when you orgasm?
I'm doing him, I'm doing him.
And then, and then his face sometimes melts,
sometimes does it.
Same with his hands, yeah.
Yeah, and his hands also melts so it seems like
But then it goes back to normal. I that's odd. He has like a stigmata
He has like a big hole in one of his palms and then when he's having sex in the car
he
With a woman who has the largest breasts we've ever seen in any movie full stop.
I think I read that they had to get a bigger car to shoot it.
I heard that was a specialty ad for Cadillac.
I love that woman because when we first saw her, I didn't imagine her breasts were going
to be that big.
So it was really like it kept on, they kept on unfolding.
Oh yeah.
And then the geography of that sex scene in the car
was so confusing.
Couldn't make it.
Couldn't make it.
It was fucking shit.
She's basing him.
Then I realized she's basing away from him.
I didn't realize they were having sex for a while.
He didn't even.
He didn't even.
I thought, I thought she must be killing her.
I thought that she was drunk or something.
I didn't understand.
I was like, why is she looking at she's having sex?
And I'm like, oh.
And I felt dirty for watching it.
And it was crazy.
The chauffeur was underneath her boots, trapped, pinned.
But then, and I don't know how this works,
but I know that some people like to use poppers, right?
Like sometimes it's sexy to use a popper, right?
Is that a thing?
Popper.
Is it a thing?
Are you asking, are you asking,
are you asking, are you asking,
poppers?
So he seems to use plutonium as his popper,
and he's like, and then he puts his plutonium as his popper and he's like,
and then he puts his plutonium hands on her.
And she does.
Well, that's the...
But that melts her, but that doesn't kill her.
No, he chokes her with the pendant that he used to hypnotize her.
Very easily, a scene that was clearly shot during Halloween in Washington square park
all stolen and
He is in that scene. This is what the movie does it makes you crazy because he's wearing a mask
He turns away and when it comes back the mask is gone
Well, this is the same with the roller skates.
Yes.
The roller skates.
He's roller skating around doing ninja on roller skates action,
which I was like, I don't get this at all,
because he's not a very good roller skater.
Yeah, he does not look comfortable.
And then when he has to jump, he jumps over a car or he does a flip or something, he lands not look comfortable. And then when he has to jump, he jumps over a car,
he does a flip or something, he lands on flat feet,
runs a couple of steps, and then he's on roller skates again.
And then they add in sound effects of feet.
Yes.
Can we just watch some roller skates clip four?
Yeah, look what I got. What the fuck are you? Can we just watch some rollers getting clip 4?
Look at this person the background
That was amazing! Broadway and Bond.
There you go!
It's not agile.
Ah!
Get him! What's got him?
What do they make me, oh, whoa.
Nothing.
Nothing.
None.
And, oh, shit.
Right after this, skates again.
Directly after this, it's a shot of his-
Yes!
That is amazing.
In the shot, can you rewind that back for a second?
Because watch that transition.
Wait, what is that sign that comedy sign?
By the way, before we started, I want to say New York has never looked better than in
this movie.
Every building, all the graffiti, the subway, everything has such great visual complexity that I was like riveted by
everything happening in the background including every person walking by
being like what the fuck is in one of my favorite moments is that robbery that
when he's on the roller skates we reveal that it seems like the mugging
happens and then they run about five feet away and they go,
woo, we did it. High five. They don't go down an alley. They just kind of
got about half a block. And he is able to be there in full ninja gear
instantly, which means I mean, look, it looks like a lot of crime is happening
in the theater district. I was looking at all the great shows, La Caja Faux,
there's a cat. Oh, I'm sorry, La Caja Faux, there's a- That's cats.
Oh, I'm sorry, but did everybody see that they walked past a movie theater playing Ninja 3,
the domination?
Yes.
A movie we've done on this podcast.
One of my favorite moments in the movie is when he is meeting the cop for the first time a young cop out on the street
is like we'll get to your dead wife we got a lot of stuff going on and then he stands in between two
signposts like a pinball and he just got bing bong bing bong bing bong he just that I don't know
it's so crazy because at first I was like, wow,
this is such a crazy interpretation of grief.
And then I was like, actually, this feels very truthful
in many ways.
And I appreciate what the director did here.
I was surprised that in his grief, early in the movie,
his wife has just died, he's got all of these things of hers
that he's trying to process his grief and he's emotional.
And at one point, he's present while a gang of thugs
shake down a child.
They are going to murder this child.
And he lets it happen.
John does nothing.
He wistfully watches a child get beat up like,
oh, that's for the days.
And then you guys shake his head and then walks off,
just like that woman who watched his wife get murdered
and the subway's theirs.
People are immune to violence and that kid is a little kid
and what could he have possibly have done
to the man wearing the Van Halen patch?
He's wearing a Van Halen. Like I feel like I didn't think I was into Van Halen. Not
not as egregious as the costume choice to put the mayor in ripped jeans.
as a gregis, as a costume choice to put the mayor in ripped jeans. At one point, I thought the mayor was wearing slippers.
I would believe it if it was because I believe they're just grabbing people and being like
to stand right there.
Don't worry.
Yeah, I think a part of the reason why most of the thugs, the gang of thugs, yes, they're
in masks because we're doubling up on whatever five actors we have.
But also, I think, so they could stand out
amidst the crowd, like they had to look insane.
They all truly looked like they had escaped
a mental institution.
They looked like the Joker's villains.
It was like, the Joker and his crew are out there.
It's like, they all are like clowns.
They are dressed like clowns.
Step that one of them again, I hate to say it, is dress like Woody from Toy Story.
And I'm not even kidding and I wish I'd marked it so we could show it, but there's one group of
tuffs that have all the normal looks except one of them is wearing tiny western gear like he's Woody from Toy Story and it's fucked up.
It's very strange. So, God, I wish we knew more about the costume designer because...
I'll tell you the costume designer. So tomorrow 8 a.m. at Howard Johnson's,
bring something weird. Because even the women though, and just to go back to slips for a second, because I grew up in
the age of slips.
Like I wore a slip in the 80s.
Slips seemed to me like the sexiest thing you could possibly have.
Really?
Yeah.
Because I never knew why I was wearing slips.
And I didn't know why they were being forced upon me.
And I think the idea, the actual function of a slip
is so that you won't see through a dress, right?
So that you won't see through another layer.
Yeah, and isn't it also so a dress will hang straight
and not get bunched up?
I don't know about that.
Well, but slip, are there slip experts?
Any slip experts? Any slip experts?
What?
They won't slip to the stockings?
They won't slip to the stockings.
Oh, they won't slip to the stockings.
Yeah, they do that.
I would slip so your dress doesn't stick to your stockings.
You wear a slip so your dress doesn't stick to your stockings.
You wear a slip so your dress doesn't stick a tears stocking. You wear a tears stockings. You dressed up as a tears stockings.
So, we just created a theater warm-up.
That's our show.
Every night before the show,
we're going to be backstage you wear a slipper.
So, you dressed up as a tears stockings.
It's like a fashion version of my fair lady.
But yeah, so the era of slips was also when we were all wearing stockings too.
Again, no one knew why.
It was just what you were doing.
But all of those women were in slips, various shapes and sizes.
But there was one woman who was
wh- I'll never forget it as long as I live.
She was wearing stockings and her underwear over the stockings.
In what scene?
In the scene where they're all leaving the warehouse.
Oh, okay.
She's wearing black stockings and like a light blue set
of cotton underwear.
Well, I'm nowhere.
There's over it.
Also a number of the bad guys are wearing cut pieces
as if they're the droogs from a clockwork orange.
Yes.
Like their job straps slash cop pieces.
I do want choices.
There are choices made in this movie
that are astounding.
And I think you're right, Paul,
in that it is all, I think there was nobody doing wardrobe.
I think these are all the individual actors' interpretations
of what they were told to do.
So you think that woman was like, I'm gonna wear black stockings,
but I wanna wear my underwear over it.
That's who I am.
Let's look at these guys.
Look at this.
I mean, each and every one of them is absolutely berserk.
This is...
We've got Cowboy hat juggalo over there.
Because they all feel like it's juggalo.
Yeah.
What I feel like in this movie.
This guy's wearing like a World War I pilot helmet.
This guy's wearing the protective gear
for some sort of swordplay.
This feels to me like a lot of villains
that you played in the old arcade game Double Dragon.
It's like, and it looks like even though that was like 8-bit resolution, this looks like 8-bit resolution.
Like the costumes don't pop, but it's like, yeah, yeah, yeah, they wear a face mask.
That's Woody. This guy has a cane with a tiny hand.
By the way, I want to be clear, that is not the guy dressed as Woody, even though he's wearing
a cowboy hat.
That's not who I'm talking about.
I appreciate you calling that out.
I want to go back to the woman with the dress, with the slip and the underwear.
In my mind, she was brought in, and they said, well, you just wear these stockings, and
she's like, no, I'm going to wear some underwear here.
I don't want you to get any weird up skirt shots of me here.
I think you're right.
I think it was protective.
It's also, it's great to know that you're so into slips.
I just thought that that was, I thought I was like,
hey, good slip action in this movie.
We don't get a lot of great slip action.
That's your, that's your kink.
Slips, huh?
I felt like slips, I haven't really gotten a chance to,
you know, it's very slips.
This tour has a lot of like fashion insight.
We talked about body suits the other night.
We're getting into a slime tonight.
One of my favorite moments is after the mayor
does his interview,
they just keep like the camera rolling
for some small talk.
He's like, the gratitude ring today.
I know.
It's great.
The kids are out in the swings.
Yeah, look at the go.
Oh my god.
We're under attack.
But I just love that like a little bit of the small talk about, oh, yeah, the kids are
out in the playground today.
It's so, it was so fun.
All like, why?
Why do we need to be in this moment and what I guess the question
that I have is they had to kill John's wife why did they have her head shot well oh no
because they're trying to abduct the other woman and his wife tries to intercede but what
would she have said oh yeah I saw Freddielinks, which is the character's name.
When John bites the Cufflink, I was like, is he trying to get close to his dead wife?
Is he trying to tell if it's real gold?
I don't know because to be honest, we saw several tight shots of those Cufflinks.
They never looked the same.
I was like, well, that one doesn't look like the one we saw. And are had him as soon as the guy is just wearing one of them in the light in the later scene
I don't know it did see Mike. He was trying to taste them so that he could recognize them by taste
I felt like he was like wait a minute. Is this chocolate covered cufflinks?
Nope, not him now. I think it would have been much more fulfilling if
Nope, not him. Now I think it would have been much more fulfilling
if one of the main villains killed his wife
because he does have multiple fight scenes
but not with Johnny Copplyn's, right?
No, Johnny Copplyn's unless I have a feeling
he's in a mask and he's one of these guys.
So Johnny Copplyn's doesn't all do that.
You would think Johnny Copplyn's in his crew
were the big
Freddy Cufflin's.
Freddy Cufflin's.
Oh, Freddy, sorry.
So sorry.
I'll be honest, if you know the names of the characters in this movie, fuck you.
I'll give you all the names.
The names are as follows.
The cameraman, Freddy Cufflings, the kid,
the pale man, Rico, switchblade, Rattail.
His name is Rattail?
Incredible.
plutonium killer.
And then the two detectives actually have names.
Detective Janet Flores, Detective Jimmy Williams.
I will say, talk about Rat Tail one moment.
They're Rat Tail when he does tiny hands.
It's one of my favorite things.
I think it's a keychain or potentially like a king top
that has tiny hands.
So when he is rubbing his own face with the gold hand,
it's like that sketch that Kristen Wigg did on Saturday and live with a little tiny hands.
And that clearly was a joke. Or, I mean, it's crazy, it's a crazy moment.
In a movie full of crazy moments.
When, when, uh...
They leave a woman in the trash.
Mm-hmm.
They find her body...
And then they...
In a trash can.
And then they're like, well, see you later.
See you later.
Sit, no. I'm sorry. I'm so sorry, Paul.
They don't do that.
They take the trash can off of the two wooden palettes it's on.
Set it next to the wooden palettes, then all walk away.
And it's so hard.
And it's so hard.
And it's so hard.
And it's so hard.
And it's so hard.
And it's so hard.
And it's so hard.
And it's so hard.
And it's so hard.
And it's so hard.
And it's so hard.
And it's so hard.
And it's so hard.
And it's so hard.
And it's so hard.
And it's so hard.
And it's so hard. And it's so hard. And it's so hard. And it's so hard. And it's so hard. She did that scene. You know, she did that scene in that car.
Give her an Academy Award.
Honestly, she deserves one.
If only we knew she was.
She was.
And to not everybody else who made it move for the best.
The crazy thing about the trash can scene
is that it's the first time the cops show up.
Like the uniform police officers do not show up. Like the uniform police officers do not show up in this city, this
primordial city, until minute 50. And I will say, but that was that was New York
city in the 80s. I guess so. You know, so interesting because it was like the
cops are nowhere to be found. But then when they do show up, they come as like a tin sum.
They're all together.
And holding their badge, and like,
if it gave me anxiety, because they have to hold their gun,
and get their badge out, like, here's my badge, and my gun.
And I'm in police uniform, like, they're,
like, who, they need to show their badge to the New York Ninja?
The crazy thing about the woman who the woman who's a cop
who went undercover is that she dresses up
and I love the New York Ninja T shirt as her undercover.
Aliens.
But then she also keeps her badge on.
Can I?
Yes.
She also keeps her badge on.
She's also the character that when
they find the woman in the trash can, she says, I'll have to do the autopsy
to figure that out.
So in my mind, she's the coroner.
Weep, that's her.
She's the right answer.
She's the coroner, or it seems as though she is.
But then later, the coroner goes undercover.
But when, after being being kidnapped and then released, like she says, well, I'll
see you guys tomorrow. And then the other guy's like, I'll take care of the paperwork.
What? Like they just rescued 30 women from an underground dungeon. He's like, I'll do
that. As long as you're here by 9 a.m.
and you get the coffee, okay?
Like, she's like, I gotta sweep this off.
I mean, these women are resilient.
They come back again.
Oh, Randy.
Randy, the movie should be about Randy,
because she goes through a tremendous amount.
She really does.
And Randy's here just to go back to it for a moment a second.
Randy's here.
It was like, she had 10 hairstyles in one hairstyle.
I've never quite seen anything like it.
It was like, it was every hairstyle on one head.
I wish she was here right now.
I know.
If only she didn't pass away mysteriously.
I feel like everybody in this movie got on the same airplane lost style and has been like disappeared.
I'm going to go out into the crowd right now. I'm going to go check out what's going on.
I'm also going to put on my special hat. I'll hold the mic so don't worry about grabbing it.
All right, here we go. What's your name? Jenny. Jenny, what is your question about New York Ninja?
This is more of a statement.
Did anyone else notice that every newspaper headline
had the same two stories underneath it?
No, that's great.
That's great.
They did get quick headlines out there.
I mean, they had catchy headlines.
And was the newspaper responsible?
Well, basically, the head of the news organization
does say, you're a great reporter.
You got to figure this out.
Like, she's not like that.
Here's what I did in other cities.
That way, they wanted to capture the reporter so many times
because she didn't seem close to breaking that story.
I will say, well, I don't,
I will say the bad guy is like,
bring me that reporter at one point.
Okay.
So there is a desire,
they say something to the effect of,
she's getting too close to this or,
but something, right?
Something like that?
Was that the bad guy in the cardigan?
Because there is a bad guy in a full on cardigan as well.
Really? Don't you talk about the helicopter pilot?
No. Are you talking? Who? The guys who meet the plutonium killer by the car,
they go, hey, assholes, like that guy. Remember when the, when the, when the, when, when he's
in the car with the corpse that he just fucked? No. Oh. When he, it's the, when the, the, the, the, when he's in the car with the corpse that
he just fucked?
No.
Oh.
When he, it's the scene after that, he's in the car as the chauffeur and then you're
then to jumps, backwards or forwards with a net.
Uh, by the way, he feels, he has a great jumping ability to lay in the movie.
Yes.
Great jumping and carries a full net,
but you know what he never carries?
His ninja swords.
They're all going to be placed in the beginning
of the movie, never uses them in combat.
Yes, you had a question,
or which one?
Oh my gosh, right, let's go to you.
Two things, one absolute favorite part is knife,
catch, and then use it to stab the other thug.
Second is, I don't know martial arts,
are powder eggs a thing?
Is that like a, I call them flower grenades.
His most used weapon is some sort of chalk egg
that he's show, throws in people's faces.
Hold on, what is it?
Okay, if these two are telling you it's glass dust
with such assurance that Paul, you need to talk to him.
Where are they? Right there.
The glass dust twins.
Sorry.
How did you know it was glass dust?
The glass dust brothers.
Throw out eggs filled with glass dust
thrown in someone's eyes.
You know this.
Yeah, it's like an ninja thing.
Oh!
It's a ninja thing.
I will say, it's a ninja thing.
You wouldn't get it, Paul.
It's a ninja thing.
I will say that person, if you are listening
to the podcast, is in full ninja gear.
All right, so, all right, what have we got over here?
We have two ninjas in the audience.
What do you got?
Name your question.
Name is Chris.
My question is, have you ever seen a movie with this many guns that are not fired?
Break question.
Lots of guns pointed, very rarely fired.
I'm assuming because once again, they were shooting scenes in public with unsuspecting people.
So you notice that there's a lot of like,
when the guns do, they just do this,
and they're out of frame for a second, you know.
All right, your name and your question.
My name is James, and an observation first,
the company that remade this movie,
they're actually their primary source of business is remaking old pornoes. and observation first, the company that remade this movie,
they're actually their primary source of business
is remaking old pornoes.
Is remaking old pornoes?
They remake old pornoes from the 70s and 80s.
They remake them?
They make them.
What do you mean, like a reboot?
Hold on, guys.
I'm seeing something that's freaking me out.
Is there an ninja?
It looks like an ninja, sir.
Are you hanging from the ceiling?
There is.
This I just saw feet.
Where?
From the center of the...
Where?
Right here. Right the the balcony starts there are two hanging feet
Kick those feet show us those feet. Can we turn the projector off? Oh
Yeah, yeah stand up a guy's feet now stand up and show yeah, what are you up to?
Stand up a guy's seat. He's gonna need a stand up and show, yeah, just,
what are you up to?
Oh, he's running the projector.
Well, you're amazing, but that's good.
Give it up for this guy.
Okay.
That creep me out.
That can't be code.
That can't be safe.
Only in Jersey.
Just to be talking to that gentleman
about 70s porno's and then seeing feet hang them
All right, are ready. We're gonna need you to hang off of the tubes and run the projector for the dumb podcast show
These fucking animals are coming in. They're gonna tear the place apart
So tell me I see a lot of notes out. What do you got?
So tell me, I see a lot of notes out. What do you got?
Question slash comment.
The helicopter pilot, they kidnap, right?
They kidnap them, but then when the New York Ninja
jumps on the helicopter, the pilot actually attacks him.
Well, I guess he was brainwashed, right?
Very quickly.
The Stockholm syndrome sets in quick, especially
when you go to higher altitudes. I was obsessed with that helicopter pilot because to make the choice because I do
think that that was that actor's choice. I think unless he didn't know he was being filmed that's also
a possibility. That was John Lugoing. You want to be in a movie and he's like let me fight. Okay well
it doesn't work for the plot but sure and that's what happened I think. Yeah he's like, let me fight. Okay, well, it doesn't work for the plot, but sure.
And that's what happened, I think.
Yeah, he's like, okay, but I want to kick the ninjas ass.
And he's like, well, that wouldn't be what's happening.
Not do it anyway.
And then the bomb that you have to,
it's like a radio, it's movies for the mind.
Enough context clues are there.
Like, I guess it blew up.
I heard it tick, tick, tick, tick, tick,
where was the bomb we never saw?
And somebody says, like, is that a bomb?
And we don't care.
We'll get that to $100.
So you have to think about the face melting and the bomb.
We've been even done for under a hundred. We didn't even talk about the face melting.
We play that clip for a second.
Where are the bad guys?
Am I the only one who found you?
Thank God, Jack.
Can you pause for a second?
You're telling me that's not a wig.
I am, actually, and I know it's confounding,
but I do not think it is.
Is it a wig by applause?
I have no idea.
Is it Central Jersey hair?
Yes, yes.
Now that the lights are up, I am seeing a lot of this hairstyle out there. Central Jersey hair. Yes. Yes.
Now that the lights are up, I am seeing a lot
of this hairstyle out there.
There are some people who have, I know,
who have confusing hair, where it absolutely looks like a wig,
but it's not a wig, and I just think that.
It looks like it's off the top.
The long of the back, it's a mullet.
But Jason, if you were a wig maker,
you'd never make this.
That's also why I think it's not a wig.
I believe she made it herself.
It is a wig wearing a wig.
Oh, so you're saying you think she might have a wig
underneath that wig.
You think it's a wig on a wig?
I think she's double wig.
I think there's a baby wig.
I think there's a two-pay on a wig that's on top of extensions.
And I think that that actress is John Lou.
By the way, the plutonium killer, can you...
Can we start this again?
Because he starts not wearing his sunglasses and then just is.
Right? Oh no, he is where I can take that.
No, this, this part, I didn't understand at all.
Of course not.
Where are the bad guys?
Am I the only one who found you?
Thank God, Jack.
Are you okay?
Come with me. Oh, Oh look it's an ninja
Yeah, so what I don't have time for that let's go Randy. You're not Jack我我我我我我我
我
我
我
我
我
我
我
我
我
我
我
我
我
我
我
我
我
我
我我我我我 Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, Now here's the thing. What the fuck is this move?
And you would think that this would be like a,
ah, okay, it's all coming together.
But like, he's using the mirror,
oh, he's photo sensitive, right?
We have a fuck point.
No, no, no, he's light sensitive.
So here's the thing.
It's, I know it's photoensitive, but what I'm saying is...
He's not sensitive to photographs.
I guess what I'm saying is, in the idea,
in the idea of the movie, like a vampire's art...
Photo-sensitive, or sensitive to sunlight, whatever it is.
You don't need to put more light in his face like the sunlight would do the trick.
Right? But this, I don't know because this scenario he's in is tricky because he's wearing a Jack
mask. Anybody here wearing a Jack mask? Three people.
A mask.
I mean, he went to great lengths to perfectly revel in how you would do that.
Including body type.
But I believe that that-
I believe that that-
Who's car got trashed?
Jack, the lanes, the lanes they are going to to capture Randy.
Yeah.
By the way, Jack, that's your car.
At one point, Jack and Randy, who are sent to investigate this wave of crime, go,
oh my gosh, these people are crazy.
It's like, yeah, that's the assignment that you're covering them.
You should be surprised at it, but Jack I believe
There's voodoo going on because the plutonium killer looks at the headshot of Jack. Don't know why Jack has his own head shot and
When that melts away, is that how he's making the face?
What do you mean you think it's an actual skin? Hang on.
Paul, what if the ninja has an answer?
They're so far away from me.
You can wait.
I'm not going to say that.
We're repeating.
We're repeating.
Hang on.
This is so cool.
And it's just the actual face like these.
It's like, you can't.
It's not.
I'm sitting on the couch.
Oh, you think it's Jack's face?
That he's wearing as a flesh mask.
Got it.
Oh, so he killed Jack and cut off his face and put it on himself and wore it like a mask.
And it worked so well that Randy thinks it's Jack.
Guys, we know face-off. thinks it's Jack. You're the best of all.
Guys, we know face-off.
I'm with a group of people in I Love New York Ninja shirts.
Oh, really?
Yes.
Who has the best question out of the three?
OK, you do.
All right.
Your name?
I am Will.
And just like an observation I made, or actually my mom made,
is that the helicopter that he plants the
bomb in and the helicopter that the bomb explodes in are two different helicopters.
Wow, where's your mom?
Good, a good helicopter, I'm mom.
How do you get on that helicopter tip?
Just paying attention all the time, non-stop. She got it.
Get away from that mom art. Well, obviously we haven't opinion about this movie there people out there with a different opinion
It is now time for second opinions
Start joining news crews and bite your ponytail brave.
I wanna give five stars to it, New York Ninja.
His murdered wife, Fluse, better make you afraid.
My second opinion, it's a hit, New York Ninja.
If he can, melt your face, he'll melt it.
Anyplace, good luck, Mr. Lou.
New York Ninja.
I'm gonna give you a big, big, big, big, big, big, big.
Look at me.
Gross.
Amazing.
Great work.
Great job, New Jersey.
You did it, New Jersey.
And now, New Jersey's own Bruce Springsteen.
He's not here.
What if he was though?
He has a podcast.
He's a big fan.
I like how you talk about those crazy ninjas.
My dad wasn't Ninja.
He didn't make much money.
But I remember.
Remember me and the big man we used to watch these ninja movies
Shana those ninja stars throwing them into throats
It was different long ago before they emblazed them with New York ninja
I wrote that about my dad. Um.
All right, here's the deal, people.
Sadly, and I hate to do this to you because it is a live show, not many five star reviews.
There are only 78 total reviews on Amazon, and they aren't as good as we would expect,
but here's the thing.
It's a new movie and I think some people get it, some people don't get it, but the people
who do say things like that.
I can't believe this is a new movie.
I can't.
This whole thing never makes sense.
Spells insane.
Betty Smoars.
Title, Secure and Sturdy.
Review, Awesome Movie, if you're looking for a cult classic, five stars. Secure and Sturdy?
That sounds like an Amazon review for a footstool. And then accidentally it was
logged under this. I know and then this is the one that I like the most from James. James
writes this, men will literally become the New York Ninja instead of going to therapy. Five stars.
the New York Ninja instead of going to therapy. Five stars.
That is true.
That is true.
So many men, when faced with life's biggest problems,
rather than admit weakness and go to therapy,
they will instead just try and become a ninja.
I want you to deal with the loss that you're feeling from the death of your parent.
No, I must become a ninja.
I will say a couple of things that we didn't touch upon.
The way they were keeping these women in the warehouse seemed to be, I don't understand layouts and space,
but it seemed to be, they could have gotten more women in,
but they seem like they ran out of things.
Like you'll be on top of this cord barrel.
You'll be on a giant frame.
You're gonna be like,
You feel like they were under like COVID restrictions.
Like they were all like six feet apart in there.
Well it did come out into any 21.
So, I honestly like,
I honestly like, did this director
like compile this movie for us?
Yeah.
I feel like the way that he goes in there
and slices through steel, like it was a cobweb,
tink, tink, tink, tink, tink, tink, tink, tink, tink, tink, tink, tink, tink, tink,
you know, everyone gets out immediately.
I was also obsessed with the dubbing where every woman once she was the sword broke through
her chains had to make some sort of a sound.
It was like, ah, ooh, ah, like everyone had
to do the dubbing for this movie. I didn't know how to say it. It's so strange. It's an odd,
it's an odd, odd movie. It ends on probably one of the best ending scenes ever. The reporter goes back to the roof
where it seems like from the plot of the movie,
she's left him from the beginning.
Like, John, did you hear they got...
Freddie Cuff links or whatever is there?
They got Anita's killers.
And he's like, oh, I wonder how that happened.
And he looks right at the camera, I'm like,
tink! And then we get this amazing still, I wonder how that happened and he looked right at the camera like
And then we get this amazing stills
The LA ninja still which from LA ninja
Yeah, I didn't see that. I didn't see that
The ninja will return in LA ninja and that comes out in 2024
Here's what I'll say. That is still New York. Well, he's heading there. He's gonna ill get there eventually.
So I guess I'm just now realizing that our New York Ninja are died in that plane in that helicopter crash, huh?
Yeah. Wow.
And that's pilots when they decide to fly very quickly.
Well, he didn't decide he was coerced.
Well, I mean, look, hold on, this guy seems to know something.
I'm really regret this but
What did the plutonium killers say?
All right, so the man says I'll make you a rich man the plutonium killer says I'll make you a rich man
If you help me kill ninja, which is right because the Ninja is now hanging off the helicopter.
Yeah, he says, okay.
I guess he deserved to die.
Yeah.
Jason, June, before we wrap up, would you recommend this?
Absolutely.
Yes.
As would I.
I would happily, I would happily right now go and sit there and watch the movie in full.
Here's for the part where I said I would go and sit there.
I would not go and sit there because these maniacs are there.
I thought it was great and I,
and let's rescue more abandoned films.
You know, people don't talk about it.
Bob Barker, you say, spay a new to your cat.
So let's go find these abandoned films. Let's get them back. about it. Bob Barker, you say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say Thank you central New Jersey
Thank you, this is amazing we love coming to New Jersey our first time we will be back. Thank you red bang
Jason Good for bad
for June, good or bad. Give it up for the bell, can he give it up for yourself?
Marching in innovation.
We're getting a standing ovation.
New York didn't do that.
Thank you.
Woo!
Oh my gosh.
This is amazing.
Thank you, everybody, so much.
Have a great night.
Bye-bye.
Each ship new jersey.
Thank you so much to the staff of the Count Basie Theater we love being in Red Bank. Our amazing tour manager, Beth Thomas, for always being there, pulling the best clips in
the biz and everyone in that audience who came in costume.
Yes, I'm giving up to those who came in costume for such a great show.
If you want to feel like you are there too, well, you can because we have a specialty shirt
designed by the live audience that night.
That's right.
The shirt says I heart New Jersey Ninja in the style of I heart, New York.
It is a great shirt.
It has a little wig hairstyle over the heart.
You can snag that shirt as a shirt,hirt sticker, coffee mug, whatever you want,
and more. Describe that at tpubbuck.com slash stores slash HDTGM. And if you are looking to
represent HDTGM this holiday season, a brand new How To Disget Made Ugly Sweater is in your
future. They are on sale now at pod swag dot com slash bonkers. We have four different sweater designs, geostorm, team sanity, team
Fred, and a jackfrost, a snow dad's better than no dad. I love these. They're great.
They're not gonna fade. They're good material. They're comfy. Get them all at
podswag.com slash bonkers. As always, we are on the road the next couple of weeks
in Chicago and Minneapolis.
Head on over to hdtgm.com to snag your tickets and we got some bonkers movies for you.
Next week on last looks, you know we're going to be going over corrections and emissions
from New York Ninja.
So if you have something you want to add to get off your chest, leave me a voicemail
at 619.
Pay you L ASK or write a comment on our discord at discord.gg slash HDTGM and
of course as always Jason will stop by for chat and we will announce our next movie we
may even share a bonus deleted scene from this very episode that you just listened to.
That's right.
Last looks bigger, better, every single week and if you haven't heard we are on the hunt
for a brand new theme song for this very show.
That's right how did this get made and if you're a musician and you think
you have what it takes to record an earworm send us a theme song submission at how did
this get made at your wolf calm or post them to our discord in the theme song channel.
Remember you can find us everywhere online at HDTGM if you love the show tell your friends
tell them listen a word of mouth helps so much.
Oddly, it's the thing the people tell me the most, that's how they find out about the
show.
And by the way, it's so much better when you have to watch these bad movies alone.
And last but not least, I gotta say thank you to all the listeners who support this show
every week our entire behind the scenes team who keeps this show running.
I'm talking about our producers, Scott Sani, Molly Reynolds, our movie-picking producer,
Averl Halley, our engineers, Casey Holford, and Rich Garcia, and our associate producer,
Jesses Narros, who makes those amazing social media videos.
That's all I got, people.
We'll see you next week on, last looks.
Until then, bye for now. Here are...