How Did This Get Made? - Ski School LIVE! (w/ Rob Huebel)

Episode Date: March 10, 2023

HDTGM all-star Rob Huebel (Bob's Burgers, The Goldbergs) joins Paul, Jason, and June to break down the 1991 R-rated comedy Ski School LIVE from the Telluride Comedy Festival. They discuss the movie'...s lambada obsession, grappling hook sabotage, solo games of Twister, and ask, "Why aren't women allowed in ski school?" Plus, June and Paul regale us with a story about their 82-year-old ski instructor Spike.Go to www.hdtgm.com for tour dates, merch, and more.Follow Paul on Letterboxd https://letterboxd.com/paulscheer/HDTGM Discord: discord.gg/hdtgmPaul’s Discord: https://discord.gg/paulscheerCheck out Paul and Rob Huebel live on Twitch (https://www.twitch.tv/friendzone) every Thursday 8-10pm ESTSubscribe to The Deep Dive with Jessica St. Clair and June Diane Raphael here: listen.earwolf.com/deepdiveSubscribe to Unspooled with Paul and Amy Nicholson here: listen.earwolf.com/unspooledCheck out The Jane Club over at www.janeclub.comCheck out new HDTGM merch over at https://www.teepublic.com/stores/hdtgmWhere to Find Jason, June & Paul:@PaulScheer on Instagram & Twitter@Junediane on IG and @MsJuneDiane on TwitterJason is not on Twitter

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Starting point is 00:00:00 Put on your backwards neon hats, grab a LeBlats, and get ready to Lumbada. We saw SkiSchool, so you know what that means. Just a sucker, plus the on-life, a tippin' great shot. Julis, brother, Demik, how you stayin' alive? They call me when you're bad ass, and he's on the line. Crankin' eight, eight minutes, cause they cool as ice. Cause the bad Jim Barney lookin' kind of nice. Paul and Julis, gettin' literal, Jason is gettin' lame.
Starting point is 00:00:52 Julis, make a shout, all the monkey shots in the pain. They're just a bunch of movies, more than makin' the grade. Here's a real question for you, how did this kid pay? Hello, people of Earth, and hello, people of Colorado! We are live at the Sheridan Opera House to talk about the best ski movie ever made. SkiSchool, a movie that seems to be made in the 80s, but was made in 1991. Now, if you've not seen SkiSchool, don't worry about it. It's about a bunch of hard partying skiers versus a bunch of preppy douchebags.
Starting point is 00:01:38 And you all know how that goes. For those of you who are listening, I'm still out of breath. Did not account for the altitude. Am I working out there for a second? I'll get it back, and I'm back. Look, there's a lot of ridiculous things in this movie, but the most ridiculous thing is that they think Whistler is the best mountain. And I want you to join me right now.
Starting point is 00:02:02 Fuck Whistler! I say fuck, you say Whistler! Fuck! Fuck! That's the kind of energy we need. We are gonna party. Everyone will be naked by the end of this show. Let's break down the film ski school, and I need to do that with my co-hosts.
Starting point is 00:02:20 Ladies and gentlemen, please welcome Mr. Jason Manzukas! What's up jerks? How we doing, Telluron? I'll be honest, Paul, you said maybe the best ski movie ever? Maybe the best movie ever? Correct me if I'm wrong. Is this movie eligible to be best picture this year? I feel like every year it should be in there.
Starting point is 00:02:51 It does. It needs to be in the conversation. This was incredible. Full stop. I loved it. Full stop. This is a movie that played on HBO every day, like for my childhood. I feel like this is non-stop on... Is that right? Oh, I feel like I saw moments of this movie for my entire life.
Starting point is 00:03:14 There's two of these movies. This movie was so successful, which is odd, because I think it only made $18,000 in the theater. But I think it only cost like $400 worth of LeBats. So much LeBats. They were like, we've got LeBats, and people were like, we'll shoot a movie. Fuck yeah.
Starting point is 00:03:36 LeBats is in? Let's do it! Alright, so let's keep on bringing out... If it was Telluron, don't you feel like it would be like all LeBats just cocaine? Well, that's the new Telluron movie, Cocaine Bear. That was made right here, right? That's... Well, there's one person on this show who loves LeBats more than anyone else.
Starting point is 00:03:58 It's my other co-host. Please welcome June Diane Raphael! Hello. Paul. Hello. Telluron. Telluron, I've been here for two days, and I have not been in one indoor snowball fight.
Starting point is 00:04:22 No one's shown me their boobs. And I feel disappointed. Same! Hard same. Actually, soft same. I couldn't get a read on you. I was watching you watch the movie, and I couldn't tell where you were at, but where do you fall?
Starting point is 00:04:43 Is it the best movie ever made? I loved it. Right? I really loved it. I did too. Thank you. Yeah. And I was so excited that there is a ski school too. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:04:57 And when do we get to watch it? And I'm also going to talk... I want to talk a lot about the spiritual other sequel or prequel to this movie, which is Summer School. Summer School. Yes. Which also has the lead of this movie. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:05:11 Dean Cameron. He plays Chainsaw in that movie. Right. He plays the exact same character in this movie, and it's incredible. I want to talk about... So there's a whole canon. There's a whole, yeah, like...
Starting point is 00:05:23 Canon of schools. What would argue that there's no schooling in this movie called ski school? No one takes a lesson. I didn't know that Dean... I didn't know Dean Cameron was supposed to be a teacher, or like a senior level person. It wasn't until, honestly, the last five minutes where I was like, are those other people in station eight students?
Starting point is 00:05:42 Yes. True. They are. Wait, they're students? Yes. They are teachers. They are students. They are enrolled in ski school.
Starting point is 00:05:51 They are enrolled in ski school. They are there to learn how to ski. Everybody except for Dean Cameron and Reid are children. Enrolled in ski school. All right, we need to bring it out. You didn't watch it enough. I'm going to tell you something. I watched interviews about it and they asked Dean Cameron and Fritz.
Starting point is 00:06:11 They go, are you guys teachers? They're like, yeah, we're all teachers. No. I think Ed and... No, because what's this face to main guy from Montana? Wait a second. Wait, does anybody here understand it? Because it's the same rules as tell your ride?
Starting point is 00:06:26 How does ski school work? I think it's like a division. Wait, do we need to bring somebody out? Yeah, let's bring out our... Before we go into the economics of this school, there is a principle, I think. Oh, yeah. I mean, we'll break it all down.
Starting point is 00:06:41 What we can see, because, I mean, look, I think they had the title, they had the script, they had the cast, and none of them were on the same page. But that was great. Please welcome our very special guest tonight. He's somebody who always says to me, it's not how far you go, it's how you go far. Please welcome Rob Hubel.
Starting point is 00:06:59 Yes. Guys, it's important for me to explain to you where I watched this movie an hour ago. I made the grave error of watching this movie in the lobby of the Madeline Hotel. Oh, no. Because I'm here with my wife and my daughter who is in kindergarten, and I thought,
Starting point is 00:07:36 well, I don't want them to see all the boobs, so I'll go down to the lobby. The Madeline Hotel is filled with children. So I'm a guy, by himself, sitting in the corner, watching nonstop boobs. This is the only movie I've ever seen where the opening title credits have boobs in it. Minute one.
Starting point is 00:08:04 Hubel, can I ask you this? Were you like, I fucking did it. I'm living the dream. I skied all day, a man spreading, watching boobs on my phone. Come on. Now, I need to know, Rob, were you tucked away in a corner? There was air a while directly behind you,
Starting point is 00:08:23 or you were in the lobby just... June. And the whole time, I was trying to look and see if there was a mirror behind me. Like, I kept pulling my laptop, but then I looked like I was trying to... Jack off, yes. So then I tried to be like,
Starting point is 00:08:39 oh, I don't care, like I'm a cool dad also. And then all these little boys are like, what's that guy watching? And I was like... Oh, God. Get out of here. Meanwhile, you've got a gondola blanket on your lap. That's right.
Starting point is 00:08:53 Tell you right. I know about your town. That's a joke line that only works here. Oh, my God. You are definitely on multiple lists right now. I will not be invited back to the Mad Line Hoot. Can I talk about how I watch this... I watch this movie.
Starting point is 00:09:12 We're staying in a condo here, and I turned on the TV, went to the Amazon Prime app, and someone had already logged in at some point. So I watched Ski School on their account, and I love the idea of somebody going to watch Bosh or something, and be like, honey, did you watch Ski School?
Starting point is 00:09:36 After they watch Bosh, it's like you might like Ski School too, or Boob School 3. I want to talk about this. I want to talk about this. Porno you watched last night? Honey, I swear, I didn't watch Ski School. Why would I watch Ski School?
Starting point is 00:09:50 I was with you. Well, I texted Paul about four hours ago when we were finished skiing, and I said, I have to start watching Ski School. Where do I find it? What platform can I find it on? And did you watch it on YouTube? And Paul texted back furiously,
Starting point is 00:10:07 it's everywhere, it's available everywhere. I was like, okay, man. One of the few movies that's on every platform. They were like, hey, if you just let us hang out at your offices, we'll give you the rights to air this movie on your screen. I believe if I watched Ski School on Netflix, it would be a totally different movie,
Starting point is 00:10:27 just also called Ski School. Give it to me. I'll give you a little sample. This is like our first scene. This kind of sets up the entire plot. Oh. Hi, Dave. Hi, Reed.
Starting point is 00:10:42 Shut up. I say, this is your last year, and there's nothing you can do about it. You're too late, Reed. I've already put an emotion in a elaborate plan. A series of events diabolically designed to with this mountain of you and your satanic presence forever. Before you think about getting me off this mountain,
Starting point is 00:11:00 you're gonna have to win first. Okay. That's the plot. Like, that is the entire plot. Here in Telluride, raise your hand if you've been in one of these competitions before. It must be a regular thing here. By the way, ski instructors often compete
Starting point is 00:11:20 for the ownership of the mountain. Okay, wait, but Rob, who did you think was an instructor and who did you think was a student? That's the first thing in my, by the way, I'm in the lobby writing furiously, watching boobs, like taking notes on the boobs. But that's like the first thing I wrote.
Starting point is 00:11:41 I looked over your shoulder before and your phone just said 34 double D, 32 C. Fake, fake, fake, real, fake, side boob, doesn't count. Yours is just, your notes were just uploaded to Mr. Skin. Mr. Skin likes the vacation in Telluride, but bust it. Literally the first thing I wrote down and the last thing I wrote down, because at some point I was like,
Starting point is 00:12:07 these guys are students on vacation? It's basically animal house in the mountains. So much so that they have the meeting with Dean Wurmer who is like, you're kicked out and they're like, JK, we're coming back. So it was like they were, section eight seemed to be like dismissible in some way. Well, it seemed to me like they were all instructors.
Starting point is 00:12:28 That's why they could be kicked off the mountain. They lived together in like a club house. He says, but it's a closet. I'm only going to call Dean Cameron chainsaw because that's all I wrote in my notes. And when I'm looking at my phone, it's just notes. I'm not like looking at my phone. But when chainsaw says to him,
Starting point is 00:12:45 these kids paid money and they're going to have to go back to their towns and having not graduated ski school or whatever. I think those other people add the AV guy fits. They're all students. And I think chainsaw and read are the instruct, they're the teachers. Let's ask the audience, people who've seen it,
Starting point is 00:13:06 who if by round of applause, are they all instructors? Wow. Well, there we go. Then round of applause. Are they all are some of them instructors and most of them students? Wow. Wow.
Starting point is 00:13:18 Which is what's interesting though, though. Okay. So I can understand that a movie about like, Oh, these, these instructors are like the bad boys of ski school and they just like to party and they think that partying is just as important as actually learning how to ski. It's partying.
Starting point is 00:13:34 I've always said that. I've always said that. But station one and all the other stations also don't seem to be teaching the sport of skiing. They are doing, they're doing more, they show them like in the gym working out. They're more committed to the sport. They're definitely working out.
Starting point is 00:13:50 But again, nobody's skiing. They're an exercise machine for skiing where you have poles. Yes. And at one point the guy's bench pressing and I'm like, those aren't the muscles you use when you're skiing. I just still couldn't get over that like the cool or the preppy people were in tuxedos.
Starting point is 00:14:08 Like they're going to local bars in tuxes. Wow. Let's take a poll. How many people tell you I own a fucking suit? Zero. Zero. You're only wearing it. But that's only because there's no whistler assholes here.
Starting point is 00:14:24 Tuxes are for whistler assholes. By the way, Fuck you, Canada. Total sidebar. I got engaged to my wife in whistler. My wife. And I was so ashamed watching this movie. I was like, oh, my whole marriage is a sham.
Starting point is 00:14:39 It is, Rob. And you got engaged at whistler because you both love this movie. Reed was doing my wife. And I had to like, you know. How is this going to be? How is this going to be? Oh, my biggest issue with this movie was this. It's a snow movie.
Starting point is 00:14:54 It's a ski movie, right? But there is no fucking snow. I pulled a lot of images of it. It's like, look at this. It is summer. It is summer. It is summer. There is so much no snow.
Starting point is 00:15:10 It's so green. It's lush. And the ski. Flowers. There's nothing. Those are winter flowers. They bloom in February. This is what it's like in the middle of winter in whistler.
Starting point is 00:15:26 Not even a touch of snow on the ground. I mean, this is supposed to be at the tide of ski season. By the way, I also don't know how this works, but it seems like the announcer for the opening of the movie is just also setting up the entire movie. He's the announcer for the ski competition, but also all the exposition for the movie. And it seems to be played on speakers throughout the entire mountain.
Starting point is 00:15:55 Everywhere you are, you can hear him. And when they focus on him wearing the headphones and the microphone, his mouth is not moving. Oh, because they use the same shot every single time. It's just ADR. It's just the lines recorded afterwards that are just dumped on there. Like, people won't know what's happening in ski school. We have to have the announcer explain the big rate.
Starting point is 00:16:15 I guess I also, I can't help but wonder like, can women go to ski school? In this movie, June now. The women in this movie are treated like garbage. They have no agency at all. And also, let me just point out, there are not this many women in any fucking ski town. There are not women walking around in bikinis.
Starting point is 00:16:39 Here are the two ways I know this is not a documentary. Too many women for a ski town, and the men are having protected sex. Dudes are using, are preemptively putting condoms on. Left and right. Right. Come on. By the way, I don't know, I mean, I guess the, I was gonna say, I don't know what the opposite of a lubricated condom is,
Starting point is 00:17:04 but what they use in that movie felt, it was like, it was so, it was so aggressively dry. It was like, it was like. You do fully work for pornos, right? I do a little bit. Yeah, you're like. Really good. Yeah, feel that.
Starting point is 00:17:25 All right, so you were talking about the ADR. The ADR in this movie, obviously every time we hear the announcer, we see this, this same shot here, which is just this shot. They just cut to that over and over again. No snow, look in the corner, no snow. It's like the people at Whistle were like, well, you can shoot the movie here, but like in July, you know. So they shoot this movie, but this whole movie is full of ADR,
Starting point is 00:17:50 which is just basically, they record this sound later. So much so, but the main character, Dean Cameron, his name was Dave Marshall. And at a certain point in the movie, they go, we got to change it to Dave Marshack. So they start to redub his name. So throughout the movie, when the leaderboard is going on, Dave Marshall is moving up and down,
Starting point is 00:18:10 but Dave Marshall isn't a character in the movie anymore. Dave Marshack is. And so they go in and ADR Marshack a million times. So you start listening. He is more of a Marshack though. I agree. That's a win for the movie. I think that's a good thing.
Starting point is 00:18:27 Yeah. Well done movie. Okay. Here's a question about station one and read. So is read also a filmmaker? No, I think he just was cutting like a promo for himself. Yeah, there's a great. Full editing Bay.
Starting point is 00:18:46 Yeah. Full editing Bay. Oh yeah. Yeah, yeah. Hidden in his hair. Multiple screens. Well, that's like all ski instructors have the ability to edit ski movies, right?
Starting point is 00:18:57 That's how Warren Miller started if I'm not mistaken. He is renting out a bar to show off his great new movie, a documentary about himself. Oh, so that bar just happens to have an editing bay. Oh yeah. I guess there's a lot going on. There's a full AV room in that bar. That's what I'm saying.
Starting point is 00:19:14 That bar is like most people would tell you right. It's got to serve a lot of different purposes. The bar, it's a video recording studio. It's a restaurant. It's everything. The other thing this movie does over and over and over that blew my mind was the throwing of beers. I loved it.
Starting point is 00:19:30 And the catching of beers. Every time. Which is so hard. It's like. That means section eight is constantly walking around with multiple cases of beer because throughout any given night or whatever, they're just like throw, catch. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:19:46 And they also are. Cool. Look, they are surrounded by, they are surrounded by beers. It seemed like one day Bacardi got involved because all of a sudden there's this one scene where Bacardi rum is just prominently displayed, but they are throwing beers all across the way. But these guys, they love to party.
Starting point is 00:20:03 And I'll show you a little clip of them talking about how they love to party. Here's, here they are right here. Anybody have anything else to add, Johnny? Let's win the race tomorrow. Of course. Absolutely win the race. We're going to look at this on how we are going to win this
Starting point is 00:20:17 race. He keeps looking in the camera. Party. Party. T. R. T. R.
Starting point is 00:20:25 T. And that's the only way that we see that they train for the race. That's it. That is the way that they win the race is by doing a flight dance. You seem mad at them. Are you saying your team read?
Starting point is 00:20:39 No, I'm just saying, it sounds like you and Hubel are team read. I'm kind of team read as well. Because as somebody, you know, Paul and I watched this as we are, you know, we are in ski school. We are with instructors. We are in telluride learning how to ski. And so to see the sport treated so carelessly and recklessly
Starting point is 00:20:59 was scary. Now let me ask you a question. You guys were in ski school all day today. Yes. If your ski instructor said, hey, do you want to come back to my clubhouse and party for the whole week? I think you know, Rob, our ski instructor is 82 years old. Please tell the story, June.
Starting point is 00:21:20 He's an 82 year old. A lovely spike. Are you here? The best. The best spike. Spike is the best. Spike is the best. And this is, this is.
Starting point is 00:21:35 Wait, baby spike. Are you? I love spike. You're, are you the standup comedian? Oh, you are. He talked about you. We heard a lot about you. Yes, we did.
Starting point is 00:21:47 He said, are all of Spike's kids here? Just one. Well, I can't, this is not Spike's story. I really don't think. It might have been Spike's story. It might have been. In 91. Well, okay.
Starting point is 00:22:04 So Rob's wants me to, to tell you what something that happened with spike yesterday. So, so Spike said it was as we were all leaving the lesson, multiple, you know, students were about to walk away and Spike said, you know, I'm 82. And I said, well, he's, well, he goes, he goes like, I want you to enjoy skiing. It's a thing that you love life long passion. Yeah. And take it from me. I know because I've been doing it for 82 years.
Starting point is 00:22:33 Now my mind automatically went to, wait, so you're older than 82 because I didn't assume he was skiing when he was born. And I was like, he must be like 90. But that's right. I said to both Spike and the group as a, as a little like, we're all friends now we've spent two hours together. I said, well, Spike, you don't look a day over 81 and Spike just blinked. No one else laughed either.
Starting point is 00:23:04 No one laughed. And every one lesson and then everybody just sort of everyone just went off in a different direction. It was silently. So if you could just relay the message that wasn't not an insult, it was my attempt at just a nice kind of moment for us as a group. So and it really fell flat. You should have tried throwing a beer at him does again, not to make this about Spike,
Starting point is 00:23:30 but does Spike have any of this in his history? Like did he see these many boops do you think according to your mom's here, your mom's here. I'm sorry. Spike's kids are here. Spike Fox. We know that. His name is Spike. His name is Spike.
Starting point is 00:23:49 His name is Spike. He was the, he was the inspiration for the character of Ed. The only character that we don't see sleep with somebody is hypnotized to stop sleeping with someone. It's like, Hey, that guy fucks too much. We must stop him. And the whole movie is like, I just don't have it in me. Like his journey is just like, I don't know why because he's been subliminally.
Starting point is 00:24:24 All their use of hypnosis is just accepted as a, this is in the movie, if you don't remember, the guy Dave goes around and whispers to people while they're sleeping, which is not a thing that you do in hypnosis and he whispers to them, you know, what they need to do to win the contest. So he tells Dave, you are not going to have sex anymore. You're going to tell something like you're going to get out of your mind and you're never going to have the other guy to lose his mind. And at one point he hypnotizes a girl under the door, talking under the door.
Starting point is 00:24:59 He's like, you're going to not have sex with my friend anymore. And it just works. It works. I do have, I do have a relation. I do want to get into the relationship of these women. There was one moment that I really, I watch again and I'm not trying to be a perv, even though one of the main characters in this movie is clearly a perv. He's on roofs.
Starting point is 00:25:16 He's looking through windows. Oh, he's a creeper peeper. Fits. Fits. And I, I really struggle. I want to hear what you're going to say, Paul. And maybe you could pull up a picture of Fits because this occurred to me. Go right there.
Starting point is 00:25:27 That's Fits. That in the beginning of the movie, I was like, Elaine Maxwell? And then it was all I could see. It was all I could see during the entire movie. It was such a crazy way to watch this. I want to just show this moment here. I should have cut it as a clip, but it was too weird to me. There's a moment where this girl's in a hot tub.
Starting point is 00:25:52 You're passed by so many insane moments. So many. That's weird. So many insane moments. The lighting is crazy. The sex scenes are upsetting. The Lombada is nuts. Why is there so much Lombada?
Starting point is 00:26:09 That was like such a reference at the time. And let me, and for real, if a woman is alone in a hot tub, real question, if a woman is alone in a hot tub, do you just automatically take off your top? Okay, this is my question about this. Watch this scene and we'll talk. Here we go. Like, he's like, I want you to meet Prince Andrew. This moment of what she's doing though in the hot tub, like, who enjoys a hot tub this
Starting point is 00:26:46 much, I thought, like, okay, well, now she's taken off her top, but this moment here, because she doesn't know he's up there yet, does she? Oh, she does. I think she does. She's busted out. I think she does. The first scene he peeps on her, she doesn't know. But now, but this moment right here, he's creeping on the roof and she's writhing in
Starting point is 00:27:07 the tub. Watch her just writhing to nothing. I thought somebody was going to come up from underneath the water. That's what I thought too. I thought I thought that's where this scene was headed. I was like, listen, when you're a woman and you've not been skiing all day, at the end of the day, you just need to get in a hot tub and you need to just soak those muscles from not skiing.
Starting point is 00:27:32 I mean, well, she, you know, she is in a dilemma because she hasn't decided whether or not she's going all the way with Reed, the main guy, which also seemed like a conversation that you might have, like, in high school. I think they're supposed to be young. I think they're supposed to be in high school. No, no, no, no, no. Reed is 52. 50 years old.
Starting point is 00:27:52 Yeah. If he's a dad. At this moment in time, he could be a local news anchor for all I know, but I believe these are supposed to be young people. I mean, look at this. I certainly think Fitz is supposed to be in high school. No. No.
Starting point is 00:28:06 He's on vacation with his family. Oh, no. Okay, forget him. His family put him in ski school. You guys have created this fake world. I don't think this is ski school like ski school up at the mountain. I think this is like, I think they're at a training, like a boarding school, like a, like summer camp, but for skiing.
Starting point is 00:28:21 That doesn't exist. Am I wrong? What is it? What is that? Like a college for skiing? I thought it was. Can somebody explain briefly what this is who might know or is it not a real thing? It doesn't exist.
Starting point is 00:28:35 Section one is our main guy. We were living in like a ski school for like a long time. They were living in a janitor's closet. They, I mean, look, and then, then, then Reed lives in this outfit here. This is Reed. By the way, we're giving this way more thought than the writers ever did. This was written by an AI chatbot. A couple of things.
Starting point is 00:28:54 By the way, well done chatbot. Well done. This movie feels like someone was carrying the finished product to like, all right, we're going to release it. And then they dropped it all over the floor. I think the scene goes here. I think that's what goes here. And there are like right before somebody had dropped a bunch of scraps of film with boobs
Starting point is 00:29:14 in it. And they were like, I guess these all go together. Like there's literally a moment where two characters have taught like, uh, uh, uh, Gislaine has already met the girl in the hot tub. But then they meet at like the cafeteria and it's like the first time they've met. And I'm like, wait, we've already seen them together. He's already spying on her. Like it just seems like.
Starting point is 00:29:34 Is there any, okay, I'm just thinking that maybe, cause I don't know where, what kind of schooling you have to go to to become a ski instructor. So maybe this is a school. Maybe this is a school for other instructors. Yes. Yes. People like that. Is that something?
Starting point is 00:29:56 And did you all agree that there were also like, uh, six other sections we didn't see because section one. Yeah. Section one to section eight. Right. So they keep moving them up the lead, up in the leaderboard. Yeah. So there are like, we don't even know those stories.
Starting point is 00:30:09 I mean, ski school three, four, five, six, seven. Oh, give it to me. Please. But like, but check it out. This is, uh, what's going on here with, uh, I just want to show you the work ethic of, of our character who I think is more like spike than our party guys. Here we go. Push, push, push, push, push.
Starting point is 00:30:23 How can you let one of those idiots contend with us? I was pretty good. How come he's not skiing with us? I didn't expect to impress anybody's way you looked on the hill today, huh? I'm 46 years old. Cam, you want to get over there and do sets with Derek? Oh, those gloves. Why is she an alien tart?
Starting point is 00:30:47 Those women will never speak. Level eight. What is this? Lawn bowling, huh? Who did 12? Come on. What is this? Lawn bowling?
Starting point is 00:30:57 Come on. I mean. Why doesn't he accept Johnny in the beginning of the movie? If that's his name, I think you're right. It is. Why doesn't he accept him in station one? Who have you, he wants like, who have you skied with? Who did you train with?
Starting point is 00:31:11 What is every skier? No, every other skier. I thought he thought Johnny was like a nobody. So sent him to the. I see. Like a, from a po-dunk town. So he accidentally gave the rejects a star. But Johnny shows up with a letter of recommendation.
Starting point is 00:31:26 Which he mocks. Who would write a letter of recommendation? You could go to a school to learn to either be an instructor or take classes. Like I didn't go to ski school to be like, I have a letter from my friend that says I'm eligible to take classes. I do enjoy it. Well, that's why I feel like it's college. I feel like it's the rules are college.
Starting point is 00:31:47 Like you go, you live there. All you have to do, you don't need to do an interview. And again, I don't know that much about skiing, but like just watch them go down the slopes. No, you have to go and meet him in his office. I agree. There's no audition. There's no like, oh, ski. You want to ski?
Starting point is 00:32:04 Why don't you take a run and we'll evaluate you. Nope. Yeah. I mean, I want to show one more, one other thing here too, which is they are being kicked out. So it would make me believe that there is a dean of admissions here. And this guy clearly. This guy's entire performance is ADR.
Starting point is 00:32:20 Completely. All of his dialogue is done by someone else at another time. You watch it and it will never sync up. Here we go. Shut up. This time, Marshak, you've gone way too far. And I'm giving the board of directors a full report of your conduct. It's literally like watching like a dubbed kung fu film.
Starting point is 00:32:39 Is there a board of directors for the Telluride Ski School? Skiing naked. The snowballs. First of all, we didn't see skiing naked. So he's referencing something that the movie does not have. Cut scene, release, release the full cut. You're unspeakable behavior also. You're all a bunch of animals.
Starting point is 00:32:57 And you're as good as out of here because it's just a simple matter of filing the proper paperwork. By the way, the worst line of villain can have all I got to do is file paperwork. Once I find the form I need to fill out, you are dunzo. The best part about this guy is every time they cut to him on the mountain, everyone else is bundled up and he's wearing like a trench coat. Freezing his ass off. Except not because it's summer.
Starting point is 00:33:26 It's summertime. I assumed that at the end when we're sort of building toward the competition, although I guess the competition is really going on the entire time, but I thought, oh, for sure we're going to see some really cool ski moves. We're going to see station one or station eight kind of outdo each other or foil the other stations work with ski moves. No. They were just like lassoing each other.
Starting point is 00:33:55 Reed had a grappling hook. Can you do that? The reason why Section 8 loses is because they lose because they were horribly beaten. And I put a little montage together. I don't know any of this stuff is legal, but take a look. Why? Why is this possible? This is murder.
Starting point is 00:34:20 This is murder. Look at this. Reed sucked his ass off. Whoa. Whoa. Oh, my. Reed let me suck it up. This, by the way, this is how Whistler competes.
Starting point is 00:34:34 They're dirty. He's also just like, people are seeing this. People are seeing this. That's all just like, this is like late summer snow. I will say like, what's over. You were the snow consultant on this movie, right? If you're talking about cocaine, yes. I will say what's crazy about this movie is that you go from, all right, the guy running
Starting point is 00:34:56 the race kicks off his ski. All right, that makes sense. The next person, his hat has turned backwards and that's the thing. Dude, I can't even walk down the street like this. They're like, they ran. They're running out of ideas as they're making the movie. No one had a better idea. Oh, I would believe if you told me this movie was largely improvised, that they just put
Starting point is 00:35:21 everybody together and said, say some shit. Apparently one night, Dean Cameron was called up to the director's room. He's like, hey, can you pitch us a bunch of bits that we could just put in the movie? And he's like, yeah. And that's how the bits of Guess Who's Underwear It Is came into the film, which is just a scene where they guessed somebody's underwear. We don't even know who that person is. This is a movie that reminds you that in the 80s, because this is an 80s movie to me,
Starting point is 00:35:45 all women's underwear was white. And all of it. And huge. Huge. Very large. Huge and white. That was it. That's what we're doing.
Starting point is 00:35:56 The woman who's in a black dress, when she takes the black dress off, she's wearing white underneath. And I was like, what? I do miss though that there's something very nostalgic to me and I'm like, you know, bring back a high cut, you know, bring it back, make it sexy again. Paul, edit this out of the podcast. Women, these women looked great. Oh, bring back everything. And at times I was like, is she wearing a diaper?
Starting point is 00:36:20 I don't know. But they looked great. They also bring back diapers. Bring back casual diaper. What if she, instead of taking off her underwear, she just unzipped either side like a diaper, just like, bump, bump, just fell to the floor. Did diapers have zippers now? No, it's like, it's like, it's like, um, like a little aqua guard YKK.
Starting point is 00:36:43 And it drops hard because she did be in it. She did? Yeah. She's hydrated. Yeah. There's such a funny moment where she's like flirting. She's like, I like to make money. Like that's like, it's the characters in this movie are so great.
Starting point is 00:37:00 She's going to maybe potentially take over the mountain. I don't know if that's not necessarily a story. I did not know who that character was. I never knew who she was. Victoria? I knew. Who is Victoria? I was like, is she a villain?
Starting point is 00:37:13 She arrived so late, she seemed like a femme fatale. Who was she? Well, in real life, she was a Playboy Playmate that they just put into the movie. Okay. And she was the owner. She's the new owner. So she's just a rich woman who's decided to buy mountains. Like people do.
Starting point is 00:37:28 They go around from town to town and buy mountains. Bruce Willis did at one point. But Johnny meets up with her at her house, I guess, or maybe an Airbnb, I don't know. She gives him her address or some number. And his first instinct when he gets there is, my friends are having a party. Do you want to leave and go to my friend's party? Yeah. And then they have sex on a kitchen table.
Starting point is 00:37:51 Yes. Again, that makes me feel like he's young. He's like, I don't know what to do. I got to get out of here. But then when it is revealed that she is the new owner, she gets this great line here. This is the end of the movie here. May I present your new owner? The mountain is ours.
Starting point is 00:38:11 Okay. All right. Okay. All right. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay.
Starting point is 00:38:19 Anybody got a problem with that? No. Let's get naked. But nobody gets naked. No one gets naked. Nobody. Shout out to Gordini Turtle Max. Now, that's how the movie ends.
Starting point is 00:38:36 It was essentially everyone getting on the dance floor. They call it Party Mountain. They've changed the name. By the way, yes. And by the way, I had also argued. I just realized the big flaw in the fact that they're all children. They're all drunk at all times and they're in bars. You have kids.
Starting point is 00:38:53 Do they drink? I mean, when they're... It's Canada, right? So the drinking age is like, I don't know, 14? I don't know. There are maniacs up there. No, it really is. I mean, Party Mountain was a real twist.
Starting point is 00:39:08 But what is the actual business transaction that takes place? How liquid is she to be able to buy... I mean, casually, how much is that mountain? Hundreds of millions of dollars. Wasn't she on the... When she first arrives in the limousine, I thought she was... No, that's the guy, I think. She arrives in the convertible.
Starting point is 00:39:29 Whoa. The guy with the dub voice is the guy like staring out of the... Yeah. And the guy in the suit is in the limo. She's always in the convertible, wearing like... It looks like a parachute at one point. The manager of the ski school is driving a limousine. No, not driving.
Starting point is 00:39:45 Passenger in the limousine. Am I mistaken also that the ski... The neon colors in this movie that at one point I used to laugh so hard at, is that not huge again? Do people not dress like this now? It's coming back. Okay. And by the way, I felt like everybody looked great.
Starting point is 00:40:02 Everybody in section eight looked... Every time they cut to read in his crew, I was like, boo. Section eight, dynamite. I was like, give me poppy, crazy, CB jackets. Give me all of the nonsense. I mean, I did love the looks and I will tell you, people... And this is why this movie has stayed for such a long time.
Starting point is 00:40:20 Now, I guess I do want to just talk a little bit about the Lombada. Should we bring back the Lombada? This is another improvised moment in the movie. This blew my mind, rather, that they engaged so long in the Lombada. A discussion of the Lombada. The Lombada is a forbidden dance. The forbidden dance, which then they kind of...
Starting point is 00:40:40 I guess it's a little bit racist. They say that like... We'll let you hear it. Here we go. Oh, wait. You're saying it's a little bit racist? Who just... Now, hang on, Paul.
Starting point is 00:40:50 What proof do you have for that if you just rewind four frames? You know, just a little... You're saying... You're positive that there's casual racism in this movie? Well, in a ton... Little racism, little homophobia. A ton of homophobia. Quite a bit of homophobia.
Starting point is 00:41:10 Eighties-level homophobia. That is like outrageous. Crazy homophobia, yeah. But yeah, this is a little racist. South Americans, who discovered fire? Fire? That's hot, hot, hot, hot, touch. Ow.
Starting point is 00:41:29 Ooh! Love. Bah. Dah. Love. Bah. Dah. Love.
Starting point is 00:41:38 Bah. Dah. Love. And that's how the Lombada came to be. What? I think I blacked out during that moment. Because I don't remember that. Well, the director only does that one time.
Starting point is 00:41:52 There's like a one-time flashback to explain the origins of the racist origins of the Lombada. Which is not even the... The dance. I don't even understand. They don't even do the Lombada! I don't know the movie! It makes no sense.
Starting point is 00:42:06 It's like they thought that the reference alone was worth it. That people would watch the movie and be like, Holy shit! What are they doing? They did it! But by the way, I think you're right, because there are a lot of people out there
Starting point is 00:42:20 that love this movie. I have actually pulled together some second opinions. You were on tape! You were on tape! You were on tape! You were on tape! You were on tape!
Starting point is 00:42:29 You were on tape! The movie was a piece of shit Yet this person recommends it Tell me what is the message Maybe that art is subjective I need a second opinion These are five-star reviews from Amazon about this movie.
Starting point is 00:42:53 And I'll tell you how they go. A guy named Matt writes, This shit rips five stars. Jeff writes, Only 20 minutes in and I give this movie five stars because of all the neon clothing. Then, edit.
Starting point is 00:43:12 This movie is terrible, but my review stands. Five stars! They also, James Heitzer writes, Ski school may be the best dean Cameron movie ever made. It's good versus evil. Playboy, playmates versus the snow.
Starting point is 00:43:33 What else do you need for top-notch entertainment? Did Citizen Kane have any of the above? I think not. Five stars! It is a point. Also, this one here, this one from,
Starting point is 00:43:48 this was written in 2015. I love this movie. They need to make it in 3D. Agree! And then this one is an odd one for a five-star review written by Michael C. Bartholomew. He writes,
Starting point is 00:44:08 Don't remember buying this movie. I guess I own it. I don't remember buying it. I'm not sure. Five stars. Wow. Someone in his family, Shirley. No, I'm upset.
Starting point is 00:44:26 Shirley purchased it. I didn't purchase the movie using that person's account. I mean, this movie, I'll just read you a couple more details about it here. We know it grossed $18,000. Is that true?
Starting point is 00:44:41 $18,000. That's the U.S. and Canada lifetime gross. But it spawned a sequel. The tagline was the hottest action to ever hit the slopes. But here is something interesting, too. If you are a fan of our show,
Starting point is 00:44:53 we did a movie called The Braxist, The Guardian of the Universe, with Jesse Ventura, The Body Ventura. The director directed that movie. But the writer went on to write Ski School 2. The director did not.
Starting point is 00:45:09 So sad. So sad. A little sadness there. But don't worry about it. We'll get it back. But tonight, we're all going back to my condo to watch Ski School 2. You're invited.
Starting point is 00:45:22 And I will say that this is the best reason why Dean Cameron made this movie. He said, this movie is so stupid. And I figured we'd have a great time making it. And we did. It looks like it.
Starting point is 00:45:37 And he's amazing in this movie. He's dynamite. He's fantastic. He's great in summer school, too. He gives me more an edgier Ferris Bueller vibe. He's always mixing it up and making people look bad
Starting point is 00:45:51 and taking on the officious kind of assholes. But it's not as clean cut as Ferris Bueller, which I like. He's a little bit dirtier than Ferris Bueller. He feels like he might be on ketamine.
Starting point is 00:46:04 Just like half of this audience. Yeah. But the last scene with him in the very end of the movie, he ends up in the hot tub with Victoria, where he looks straight into the camera. And knowing that
Starting point is 00:46:18 Victoria just had sex like the day before with Johnny on the kitchen table in an Italian ride, baby. No problem. I do want to show you the worst shot of this entire movie. I was obsessed with this.
Starting point is 00:46:32 This is the worst shot as we wrap up here. Check this out. They're trying to create a crowd. A lot of times we have a small budget movie. You don't have much crowd. So here is this movie's version
Starting point is 00:46:45 of a crowd. So many people. So many people. Look how close they are. This woman, this extra is in every single scene. I mean, the camera pans through. That was six people.
Starting point is 00:46:58 The camera pans through. So it's like the scene from Goodfellas. The scene from Joe, Joe and Joe and Joe and he's like I'm going to take a class at this and say hello. This is Reid's Party.
Starting point is 00:47:12 This is Reid's Party where the section eight takes it over and plays loud music and the one guy goes to the other guy, oh, another couple of up tempo songs like this and this party could get out of control. We haven't even talked about the
Starting point is 00:47:28 music in this movie. Next level. All day. Yes. It's all about, like, do you like to party? And I just wanted Glenn Plake in this somehow. And this is the best one. Giant mohawk.
Starting point is 00:47:44 I just think that any movie that ends like this, where you go on your main character, and you're meant to make people fall. And he goes, but that's Ferris Bueller. But Ferris Bueller looks at the camera the entire fucking movie. This waits until an hour 30. And he's like, I know you've been watching this movie.
Starting point is 00:48:04 And he holds it for too long. Here we go. We got to watch. Then he toasts us. Like, we did it. We were complicit. How great. I was a part of this.
Starting point is 00:48:15 Yeah. You should be ashamed of yourself. He also drops these, like, epic tag lines that he thinks are epic that the audience has never heard before. At one point, he goes, know it, live it, love it. Another one is, we came. We partied.
Starting point is 00:48:35 Well, shit. I wrote it down. Shit. God damn it. Black it out. I said, I don't want to black it out. The other one, not how far you go. It's how you go far.
Starting point is 00:48:45 What does that mean? A funny thing that you might have said when you were super stoned, but not something you would put in a movie multiple times. That's a tag line. But do you have it, Jason? Oh, sorry. I stopped looking for it.
Starting point is 00:49:00 I felt like, oh, we've moved on. I'm embarrassed. No, now, actually, everybody stop. We're going to sit until I find this quote. Uh-oh, he's going. He has 42 thumbs. Boobs are a character in this movie. I wrote that.
Starting point is 00:49:20 Now I'm just going to shout out other things I wrote. I mean, so I guess I guess it gets a question. I'm so sorry. I have no idea. I guess the question is, would we recommend this movie? I'm saying yes unequivocally. I recommend this movie. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:49:33 1,000%. This is a special motion picture. I would say this. Don't watch it in the crowded lobby of your hotel with a lot of children around. Rob, I didn't even say to you. When I watched it, I watched it on an airplane. And I was sitting next to my son.
Starting point is 00:49:50 I did not realize that there were going to be boobs in it. I watched the entire movie with my notebook over the screen, just so I could see heads. And I was just moving it around like that. You missed so much. I literally saw no boobs. And I know there are a lot, because I held this up for, I would say, 50 minutes of the movie, my notebook.
Starting point is 00:50:11 Oh, yeah. So you were just holding it up in the fear that there might be boobs? Any time that anyone was like, let's go in this closet. Come back to my room. Let's play Twister. I was like, whatever that, what is the Twister thing? So low Twister thing.
Starting point is 00:50:27 So low Twister. OK, this is so crazy, because she's just been hypnotized through the straw or something under the door. Is that one? She's been hypnotized. And what he said to her, Rob, was that he was saying, show him that you really love him. And so for whatever reason, that really
Starting point is 00:50:53 got integrated in the next thing we saw. She's playing Twister with him. Playing Twister by herself. This is crazy. But this is so sexy, just this part. By herself. But is she doing it clearly mentally ill? This is their version.
Starting point is 00:51:14 This is their homage to the graduate. But also, if she's doing that to seduce him, she has no idea that he might show up to her apartment that night. She's just been playing Twister for hours. She's been upside down for hours. Listen, when you're a woman and you're not allowed to ski and you're registered at a ski school.
Starting point is 00:51:35 This is what people did before yoga took off. Oh my gosh, all right. We came, we partied, we conquered. That is it. That's what it was. Thank you, everybody. Not worth it. Not worth it.
Starting point is 00:51:49 Thank you, everybody, for coming out tonight for the first part of the Tell Your Right Comedy Festival. It's been amazing to have a show with you here. We're going to do an improv set in just a little bit. So go out there, tip your bartenders, and take a little bit of a break. Everyone will line up to the bathroom with a smell-gross face.
Starting point is 00:52:04 See you, bye-bye. Thank you, guys. Rob Heuvel, Junday Ravio, Jason Mann, Zooker. Thank you. Paul Scheer. OK, that brings us to the end of our ski school episode. That was so much fun to do that show in Tell Your Right Colorado as a complete surprise to that audience
Starting point is 00:52:22 and with our first guest back in the mix, Rob Heuvel, the great Rob Heuvel. You can watch Rob and I every Thursday on Twitch. We also simultaneously stream to YouTube and Facebook. We do a show called Thursdays with Rob and Paul, where we just sit around, have fun, talk to celebrities, and the premise of the show is it's the only who's the boss recap podcast.
Starting point is 00:52:46 But unfortunately, we never get to that who's the boss episode. One day, we will. Jason, June, and I will be back at Largo in April and March. You know, every day that we have a show will release a few extra tickets the day of, based on the amount of comps that we have left over. So if you didn't get tickets for those shows, which are now all sold out,
Starting point is 00:53:12 please just keep looking at the Largo website, sign up for their mailing list and head on over to HDTGM.com to find out the movies that we will be doing for that run in April. I am so excited about that. Also, if you are a Hulu subscriber, get on The History of the World. It basically has everyone that you love in comedy
Starting point is 00:53:35 and not in comedy in the show. It is created by Ike Barron-Holtz, Nick Kroll, and Wanda Sykes, a true sequel to Mel Brooks' classic film, The History of the World. This is a lot of fun. I have a very small part in it. If you find me in it, give yourself a penny because you're definitely lucky.
Starting point is 00:53:56 But Jason is fantastic in it and you could check that out on Hulu. There's a four night streaming event happening and you will not want to miss it. Something else you don't want to miss is some of our top secrets merchandise. One of our producers, Molly Reynolds, has created some amazing stuff.
Starting point is 00:54:16 Check out our social media to see our top secrets journals. Also, we have a great bunch of new shirts in our T-Public store. So there's plenty of places for you to find a bunch of good. How did this get made? Very niche merch. A big thank you to our amazing tech crew in Telluride and everyone at the Sheridan Opera House
Starting point is 00:54:36 for making that possible. The Comedy Festival there is a blast and Jeb Barrier makes it possible every single year. So thank you for figuring out how to record this show and make it usable. So we appreciate that so much. And then a big thanks to our team here who made it actually usable for your ears.
Starting point is 00:54:55 I'm talking about the amazing producerial work of Scott Sonny, Molly Reynolds, and our movie picking producer, Avel Halley, our engineer, Alex Gonzalez, and our publisher, July Diaz. People, they make the trains run and we love them. So we will see you next week for Last Looks. And until then, bye for now.

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