How Did This Get Made? - The Specialist LIVE! (w/ Nicole Byer)
Episode Date: April 7, 2023HDTGM all-star Nicole Byer (Grand Crew, Nailed It!) joins Paul, June, and Jason to break down the 1994 Sly Stallone & Sharon Stone thriller The Specialist, a movie that argues bombs are more precise w...eapons than guns. LIVE from Largo in LA, they discuss James Woods savoring every second on screen, Rod Steigers' bonkers Cuban accent, and the hotel shower sex scene that reminded Nicole of the hot dog hands in Everything Everywhere All at Once. Bye bye! Go to www.hdtgm.com for tour dates, merch, and more.Follow Paul on Letterboxd https://letterboxd.com/paulscheer/HDTGM Discord: discord.gg/hdtgmPaul’s Discord: https://discord.gg/paulscheerCheck out Paul and Rob Huebel live on Twitch (https://www.twitch.tv/friendzone) every Thursday 8-10pm ESTSubscribe to The Deep Dive with Jessica St. Clair and June Diane Raphael here: listen.earwolf.com/deepdiveSubscribe to Unspooled with Paul and Amy Nicholson here: listen.earwolf.com/unspooledCheck out The Jane Club over at www.janeclub.comCheck out new HDTGM merch over at https://www.teepublic.com/stores/hdtgmWhere to Find Jason, June & Paul:@PaulScheer on Instagram & Twitter@Junediane on IG and @MsJuneDiane on TwitterJason is not on Twitter
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Turn the bomb around
We saw the specialist is
BASTARDO!
BASTARDO!
Hello people of Earth! Hello people of Los Angeles!
We are live at Largo talking about a modern day classic.
A movie about love, revenge, and a movie about very precise bombs.
If you've not seen the specialist, what do you need to know?
Stallone makes bombs.
Well, both kinds, really, if you think about it in the history of the show.
But in this movie, Stallone makes explosive bombs.
Sharon Stone wants revenge on the people who murdered her parents,
so she wants to do it with, you guessed it, a bomb.
Because as she says, it's more precise than a gun.
We'll get into all of that.
But there are many twists and turns along the way that are dealt out in the most nonchalant way.
No underscoring, no turn of music where you're like,
oh, oh, oh, I guess that's what's happening now, great.
It's like someone's telling you a story, but don't know how to add in any emotional elements to it.
I can't wait to break this all down, and I'm going to do it with my two co-hosts.
Please welcome to the stage Mr. Jason Manzuchus.
What's up, jerks?
How are we doing, Largo?
Jason, have you ever seen the specialist?
Paul?
Shockingly, no.
Same. I don't know, I missed it.
I want to say, for the record, shame on me.
Shame on me, yes.
Because this movie is awesome.
I would watch it right now with everyone here instead of doing the show.
Because no notes, except to say, boops, yes.
Explosions, yes.
You got, and James Woods.
Woodsy, I feel like is like, take your script and leave it.
Yeah.
Because I'm going to do whatever the fuck I want.
You just, you call action and I will just start screaming at anyone nearby, and that's the movie.
Adam, I'm here for it, but you know what?
He must have been furious that he was not in the trailer.
Oh, furious.
I have some dirt about why James Woods is not in the trailer.
I want to hear it, let's go.
Let's get into all of the James Woods stories, because it really is prime Stallone ego stuff.
Really?
You're saying that Stallone's ego is part of the problem with this movie?
A movie that somehow fetishizes his body more than Sharon Stone's?
Let's go.
Let's get into all of that, but first, let me introduce my other co-host.
Please welcome a person who fetishizes Sylvester Stallone's body more than anyone,
June Diane Raefiel.
I hear you, I hear you screaming.
I hear you screaming, save it, save it, save it.
Yeah, our special guest had something to say and we need to conserve and we need to economize and we can't talk about it.
No, I know, I know.
We can't talk about it.
I tried to move forward.
We won't.
How are you, June?
I'm well, how are you, Paul?
I'm very well.
You're looking very nice tonight, good to see you.
Oh, thanks.
June, your thoughts out of the gate on the specialist?
I also had not seen it, and yet I feel I have.
It was very strange watching it, because I thought for sure this was a movie I watched with both parents,
sitting in between them in 1994.
I was 14 years old and I know I watched this on TV with a parent.
There is something that is so similar to many movies that were made in this period.
They all had a similar vibe.
It was like a movie for adults.
This is the era of the erotic noir, neo-noir, noir story of sliver, jade, all these things.
Basic instinct, this is three years after, or two years after basic instinct?
I mean, this is better than basic instinct?
I don't know, we'll get into it.
I enjoyed it.
Oh, yeah, I enjoyed it.
And I've got real thoughts about how to really make it sing.
We're going to get into all of that, but we must welcome our special guest.
She's a how did this get made all star.
She is the star of the hit NBC sitcom Grand Crew, which you can watch on Peacock and on NBC.
You know her also as the host of Nailed It.
Her stand-up special on Netflix has to be watched.
Please welcome Nicole Bayer.
My feet, my feet don't touch the floor.
What are these chairs?
I'm in this one over here.
I'm in a little, I'm in this guy over here.
Look at the show.
You look like you're doing a Lily Tomlin character.
Baby Nicole over here.
Nicole, welcome back.
You are a favorite of ours, but you are a favorite of the audience of how did this get made,
because I will say that when we didn't have guests for a long time,
the number one person people wanted back was you.
Oh, that's nice.
Thank you.
People always like getting Nicole back on.
Where's the toll?
And now you're here and I feel like we brought you in with a good movie.
Boy, oh boy.
I had a great time.
Oh my God.
It was like trying so hard to be sexy, but then his hands were too big to be sexy.
Like the sex scene reminded me of the hot dog scene and everything everywhere all at once.
His hands were just like patting her head.
At one point, they close up on them kissing and he's kissing below her lips.
And I also feel like, can you be Sharon Stone for a second, Nicole?
Actually, no.
You be Sly.
Stand up for a second.
I feel like she was always behind him.
He was like, he would turn.
You could see his like thighs.
Yeah.
And then he would just be like his hands.
He would just be like, yes.
Was he?
Yeah.
I mean, was he somehow Sly was more naked than Sharon Stone at all times.
I was like trying to look around him.
It was really fetishizing him to get his body in a very sensual feminine way on camera and
front of camera.
Do you feel like she leaves him?
She's like, I got to get out of here.
And he's like in the tussle bed.
This is a movie where he is embracing his feminine.
And I think that that's beautiful.
But I also feel like there is something about him where he was like, I know Sharon Stone
is one of the most attractive women right now.
And people want to see her naked.
But I think they'll want to see me more.
It's like the main attraction at this point, I'm like, oh, the person for basic dancing.
Oh my God.
Oh, sexy.
He's like, no, no, no.
I think I can out sexy her.
But here's the crazy thing too is it's so clear that the actor wants to get his body out to
the American people.
And I'm like, well, you're playing, but he's playing a bomb maker.
I think.
Yes.
He's playing.
He's the specialist.
He's the specialist.
That doesn't actually require, I don't think, any physical.
I'm so sorry.
Strength or, or.
June, one might argue.
But have you read any of the novels that suggested this movie?
Did everybody see the credit at the beginning of the movie?
Because I was like, what?
Suggested by the specialist novels by John Shirley.
Suggested by.
Here, June.
What?
What does that mean?
What is the thing?
I mean, I will just say, pipped it at in the novels up.
Here, June.
What the fuck is this?
It alluded to.
June, look.
I took a picture.
What is that?
Suggested by.
I was like, why is it just suggested and not based on?
This credit is when I was like, oh, this is going to be so good.
Because you know, you know it's only suggested by because Stallone must have rewritten everything.
So you're saying that the novelist that John Shirley himself was like, I don't want.
This no longer represents my work.
This is a mere suggestion.
My guess is the character, because the character in the, in the movie, the specialist, the
Stallone character is supposed to have been trained by James Woods.
That would make him young.
And he's somehow a decade older than James Woods.
James Woods is his boss.
What are you talking about?
Here's what we know about Stallone.
And I love this fact and I'll repeat it nonstop.
When he made the movie Cobra, it was based on a book.
And Stallone met with the author and said, what I'd like to do is put my name on the
book as the author.
And the author is like, no.
He's like, no, you don't understand that when the movie comes out, more people will buy
your book if they see that I wrote it.
He's like, but you did it.
I'm the author of the book.
And he's like, dude, don't be a dick.
And so Stallone does have this habit because this character of the specialist, his name
is Earl Quick.
They don't keep even his name.
So it's like they bought the rights to the specialist and the characters Earl Quick.
And they're like, throw all that out.
We like bombs.
And that's what they focused on.
That's it.
Bombs are the only part of the story.
That's the suggestion.
That's the suggestion.
Interesting.
I want to get into the sex scene.
But I also want to walk it back and say that the opening scene takes place in this country
where they are trying to kill a drug lord with a bomb.
With a series of bombs.
A series of bombs.
And how are they going to do it?
They're going to blow up a bridge.
So the intel is, we know the drug dealer is coming.
He's going to be driving a Jeep.
Let's blow up a bridge.
No one's like, how about a sniper?
No.
Bombs.
And is the bomb going to blow up the bridge?
No.
It's just going to blow up the truck so the truck flies off the bridge.
The bridge will stay intact.
Again, maybe use a sniper.
What if people survive?
What if people survive?
That's what happens when it hits the water.
It's like, fold.
And there is a child once again.
We're doing a movie where it begins with infanticide.
They're like, you know how we can get you on board for this movie?
Our hero kills a child by accident.
He doesn't want to.
But he locks eyes with that kid when she gets blown up and you know a fetish is born.
The way he runs over, his lips are so loose.
Do you know what I mean?
They just jiggled in a way that I was like, how is that happening?
His lips, and I do want to go back to the sex scene very briefly.
When he locks onto her, it's like an octopus because it's not like a kiss.
It's like, I have now suctioned my mouth onto yours.
And it's like implanting an alien embryo from the movie Alien.
It's like, his lips, there's a lot going on there.
It was very upsetting.
It's so long, the sex scene.
Oh my God, that butt.
Also, they're in the shower.
That's the biggest shower in the history of showers.
You're fully missionary on the floor of a shower?
When they go to the floor in the shower, I'm like, eww.
It's a fucking hotel shower.
I wrote the same thing, that is a hotel shower floor.
They have, for real, like last of us fungus going on now.
It is game over for them.
The bed is a mere four feet away.
Just dry off, fuck on the bed.
They started on the bed, and then they said, we gotta get in that shower.
We see more of Stallone's body than Sharon Stone's.
You do.
And the way he straddled her on the bed, I was like, what is that?
It was like, and it was like, it was like the sea rates.
Hey, she's taking his clothes off.
Yes, it was wild.
It was a flip, a gender flip flop.
Because he was like, my body is the gift.
I'm good.
Yes, it's basically you're unwrapping me.
Welcome everybody.
Yes, I'm the present.
You want me to be unwrapped.
I'm what you've paid for.
Sir, no we haven't.
The only sexy thing that happened is when he lifted her up onto him.
When he was straddling, and then somehow her legs were on the other side.
I don't know how they did that, but I was like, well, that's pretty hot.
But then those hands.
That was one moment, Nicole.
That was it.
What I think I learned from this movie is that Stallone is not good at having sex.
And he was like, I'll show you some of my moves.
And everyone was too nervous to say, that's weird.
He was like, grab it from behind the head.
Bring it like this.
Suck it in the mouth.
I'll throw her on the floor.
I'll put her right on the sewer.
And then he's like, you know, you know, you know, people want, they saw Basic Instinct.
They want me to be sexy now.
What if I'm the Sharon Stone of this movie?
Oh, God.
Also, Eric Roberts is in this movie.
As a Cuban?
As a Colombian?
Wait, what's Colombian?
I mean, his dad was, yeah.
His name is like Tomas.
It's not Thomas.
So they say Tomas a lot.
But I want to just, again, as we're going to get back and forth in the movie, but I will say,
what I don't like about this movie is the way that they handle explosives, because it's
about an expert, a specialist, if you will, who literally when we first see him, he's
pounding explosives onto a wall, like the way I pack a suitcase that's over stuff, like
clank, clank, clank, clank.
Like you would think it would, you might be a little more gentle around like.
Well, later he gets gentle when he's covered in sweat and is wearing those tiny glasses
and is like, that's right.
Right, he's a very, like when he's putting it in a China Dolls teacup.
When he's busy living in what appears to be an industrial gear factory.
For the rest of the movie, Stallone detonates explosives in only public places.
Yeah.
Country club, strip club or bar or whatever that place was, like he's only blowing up.
There have to be so many casualties.
No, there are though, because he has a special type of technology.
He blows up a half of a building falls off the top of an entire building.
But that's planned.
That was that particular explosive.
That was the one section, one apartment explosive.
When it comes to people, it normally just shoots them out like they're in an ejector seat.
Like when it kills the guy in the parking lot, the seat.
That was perfect.
It was absolutely perfect.
That man strapped to his seat on fire going to the sky.
He flies up like he is ejected from an airplane from top gun.
And yet, is the bomb in the car?
No.
Is the bomb under the seat?
No.
It's in like the parking meter reader that you bit when you leave the garage.
So that oddly like...
Is that the bomb?
I thought that was the...
The keypad was.
The keypad was the bomb, but there was nothing in front of the car.
And then it says bye-bye.
How long did it take him to be like, oh, good.
It does say bye-bye.
Thank God I was able to make that work.
Bye-bye.
This guy is so long to escape.
10 seconds and two bye-bys.
Okay.
So just riddle me this.
He gets to Miami and decides to set up what type of business exactly?
Well, this is my big question because he is constantly telling us he's not in the bomb-making revenge business,
but yet he's on a private like internet message board called the weekend warrior,
which seems like black market shit.
I thought that was his website.
It feels like this is an A-team situation or an equalizer.
Like if you're in trouble, I'll help you out secretly kind of underground like hero guy.
But why was he rejecting her?
I don't know.
I think he was worried it was a setup.
But was he rejecting her?
He was like, I like your voice.
And that's...
And by the way, they're essentially having phone sex for the first hour of the movie.
Longer.
Longer.
He's...
He is...
He is sensually working out, listening to recordings of their phone conversations.
That was wild.
Like this shit is absolutely nuts.
He thinks this is what we want.
You see more of him shirtless than you see of Sharon Stone.
Like throughout this entire movie, but like he's doing Tai Chi, but he also has this big cumbersome earpiece in.
It's so big.
It's so big.
It looks like he has like a microphone, like the front of a microphone on the side of his ear.
And he's like just being casual, just listening.
He's also tailing Sharon Stone.
He's like, you know, spying on her, watching her while she is...
Sharon Stone, this in a noir sense, she's the femme fatale.
She's inserted herself into the Eric Roberts drug lord world with his father, Rod Steiger,
who appears to be doing a Desi Arnett's junior impression.
Bastard, oh.
The next level.
I heard that Rod Steiger was like, I don't need anybody.
I'm just going to watch Scarface over and over again.
I thought they were just like spicy whites.
I didn't realize that they were going for Cubans.
Spicy whites.
This is Rod Steiger's accent on full display.
Wait a minute, wait a minute. Give me a second here.
I have to make a decision.
Little time to think here, huh?
Okay.
You take over, okay?
Papa.
I said, Trent, we'll handle it, okay?
I don't hear you saying, okay?
What would you say?
Okay.
That's nice. Thank you.
Lucy, Lucy, we are in trouble here.
It's nuts what he's up to.
It's also like drops into just Rod Steiger at points.
Like that was a mix and match.
That was not a full, like he goes in and out of that accent,
but they are supposed to be these drug lords that killed Sharon Stone's parents.
In front of her, she was hiding in the closet.
Eric Roberts, who seems to be the same age as him.
He is.
Yeah, he's an age.
He is.
But yeah.
It's 20 years later.
She is a six-year-old in the closet and is now Sharon Stone.
Eric Roberts, Eric Roberts, 20 years ago.
Eric Roberts now.
This is, that should be examined.
I did like that the flashback was like a noir lifetime movie.
Yeah, it was truly wild.
And Eric Roberts was like, pretty rude.
He was like, hurry up.
And I'm like, if I'm being murdered, can you not rush it?
Take your time.
Be kind.
And why were they being murdered?
We don't know.
Because they didn't have, they were being asked for information they didn't have.
And I don't know that we ever found it was not important.
Ever clear.
Yeah.
He just, he loves murder and dancing.
What I loved about Stallone doing his research on Sharon Stone as a child,
he pulls up like an old newspaper and it has a picture of the child.
It's like, Mya Sinclair's parents killed kids still alive.
And it's like, no one would write an article like showing a picture of an alive child,
being like, she's alive, parents are dead.
Like you would think that they would go back.
Hey, if they were executed, they might go back and kill her too.
Right.
But it's also like, I feel like a weird thing to put her in the front page of the paper,
like, I'm orphan.
May moon row.
I'm sorry.
May moon row.
That was her name.
So just to go back to Stallone for a second and his work in Miami.
So he is just on call in case a bomb maker.
I think he comes there because she's asked him to because he says at one point I don't
work in Miami, but he's there.
Oh yeah.
Wait, so he's renting that fairy house?
I think, yeah.
I think he's temporarily set up shop at the gear factory.
Temporarily, Jason.
It's a three story facility on the water that he has set a computer program up.
It's so weird.
He walks in the house to hit a button to say no one's in the house.
Well, guess what?
If they were behind the door that you walked in on, you're dead.
He gets made immediately.
He's so bad at being subtle.
Eric Roberts clocks him immediately.
They're like, oh, that guy right there.
That interaction made me so happy.
You like the bitch?
You like me?
I don't like you.
He's like, gay, no.
He's like, no, no, no, don't get that.
Don't get the wrong idea.
But do look at this body.
Do look at me oiled up and come guttered out.
Would you be surprised to learn that Stallone decided to add that scene in during production?
Because he's like, oh, I really want to have a scene with Eric Roberts because I don't have a scene with him.
So he picked a scene where he says one sentence?
Or he holds a knife and basically says, you're looking at me because I'm attracted.
It's like a threatening scene.
It also makes him appear bad at his job.
But again, what is his job exactly?
Because if his job is to just make the bomb, then I think he's fine at that job.
I think he's a bomb expert for hire for people that need help dealing with some sort of situation.
But then why is he rejecting Sharon Stone?
Because it seems like her situation qualifies.
These three men killed my parents who were innocent and I watched them die.
And it doesn't check all the boxes for me.
Do you think though, Jason, that this is his normal vetting process?
Yes.
Wow.
Yeah.
I think his vetting process is go to a city.
I think if this movie had worked, my guess is that there are a number of other novels to suggest storylines for.
Maybe he goes to Cincinnati and he sets up shop in an abandoned water warehouse.
I don't know what.
Give me the biggest conspicuous thing in your city.
I'll move to Chicago and own the Sears Tower.
Right.
No one will ever find me there.
But I will say this.
There's a screenwriting book called Save the Cat.
It was very popular for a couple of years.
The idea was that in the first act, you would see your character do something that was nice that you get him on your side.
You would save the cat.
Here, he kills the cat, which is the child, and then also then saves the cat.
The movie wants it both ways.
He saves the cat and kills the cat.
That was so weird.
He doesn't know how to hold a cat either.
He's just like, oh, the cat is going to take you home and miss you.
I'll fuck you on the sewer, kiss your mouth.
He's like Lenny from Of Mice and Man.
You think he might crush the cat or crush Sharon Stone?
I don't know.
He seems capable of murder.
Also, that cat was pretty distracting.
In the scene where he's sweaty doing the bomb, that cat's climbing a chain link fence in his house.
I was like, yeah.
I'll tell you one thing I don't want near a bomb.
A fucking cat.
The way everybody treats, I mean, the bomb squad of the Miami PD is also treating bomb material very casually.
Like strewn across, and we see them.
And by the way, is James Wood a cop?
I don't know.
He had access to the CIA.
Wait, is he lying?
He's a cop.
No, he's not.
Rod Steiger inserts him into the police department.
That's the scene with the chief of police who's there.
Rod Steiger's like, hey, I need you to make this guy part of the police investigation.
But what then happens is James Wood just walks into the police station and is like, you fucking idiots.
I handle this.
You do that.
You fucking idiot.
I created a bomb out of a pen.
I'm crazy.
James Wood is eating every morsel of screen time.
He is allotted.
He is chomp, chomp, chomping away.
He clearly, like, and he's often not with anybody else.
So I feel like he's like, look, these people that are in my scene, shut the fuck up.
Let me, let me cook.
When he's, again, running a different part of the Miami PD where they're staging a sting to try to get, to try to get Stallone to call into the message boards, I don't know.
And they have all of this, so they have all of these women pretending to be Sharon Stone.
Because is he attracted to women in distress?
I think he's attracted to, he likes phone calls with women.
He's like, it's just like disembodied voices.
He's like, they make me so hard.
A thousand percent he likes it over the phone.
So, but what's so crazy about that scene is that he, those wonderful background artists who are all, most of them are women and I guess their cops there, they genuinely look terrified.
Like, truly.
Nobody in those scenes is safe.
Yeah.
I like the scene when James Woods is going to the elevator and is literally like, get a new shirt, you fucking idiot.
Get in my fucking way.
I got, get next one, next one.
There's a man who witnessed a murder, a young boy who's a car valet who's like sitting there and he's like, what the fuck are you laughing at?
Piece of shit.
This kid is given like three sticks of dynamite rally.
He's given like a cartoon level bomb.
He looks like a Tim Baltz character.
He's fucking freaking out.
And James Woods comes in and he's just, he's like, my whole thing is I yell at whoever I'm in a scene with.
I dress them down fully.
And it's incredible.
So wait, so you're saying, one second, Paul.
So you're saying that James Woods and Stallone just happened to both be in Miami?
No.
No.
James Woods is using Sharon Stone to draw Stallone out.
Is that scene where he hits her?
Got it.
Right of course.
Of course.
Like fucking hits her and then plays with the blood on her lip.
I was like, this is wild.
I did not like that.
I didn't like it either.
But did you like it when she slapped that woman in the bathroom?
I loved it.
I loved that.
Oh, I loved it.
Because that was the hottest thing I've seen in a while.
BAM!
She pushed her.
Henry, she'll call you back.
Come play him.
There was elements of this that felt like Stallone was embracing his feminine side,
but then there's another element of it where everyone just felt up Sharon Stone.
Really?
Nilly.
Like everybody was like, I got to touch everywhere.
Yeah.
At the funeral, he like gets on his knees and then shoves his hand up her skirt.
And I was like, dude, it's me.
But then she did have a gun.
And I was like, okay, well.
What's really sad is that's not the first time someone was felt up in that church.
He was just moved to a different parish.
I wrote that joke down.
Can you explain?
That joke is in my notes.
Wait, at the funeral, I really loved when James Woods comes in, he's like, open the
casket.
Everyone's like, what?
He's like, open it.
And then he goes, that bitch too.
That was my favorite part of this movie.
To a woman who we've heard in the eulogy as being a pillar of the community.
A saint.
This funeral has been twice interrupted by rude white men.
First of all, so I was like, wait a minute, what?
By the way, that was, I mean, like, can you imagine being at a, who's that guy?
He walks straight up and needs to look into the, oh, that's not her.
And then James Woods comes in, points a gun at the priest and calls her a bitch.
Those people will have questions for the rest of their lives.
What do you think grandma was up to?
That's what I love so much about this movie.
Like there's moments like that.
There's moments when Sharon Stone pushes a very nice lady and steals her phone and slaps
her.
It's surprising.
And I'm like, I love that this movie goes there.
Now I was trying to follow Sharon Stone's plan and how she, that whole mixeroo with
that grandma.
So what did she do exactly?
She put her own.
Well, this doesn't entirely understand the funeral part.
I did not.
I literally was like, I don't know why everyone is confused.
I don't know why this is even working.
I can tell you what it is and what's said, but there is a disconnect.
So James Woods is looking at the paper and he sees that a woman who has the name of Sharon
Stone's alias.
I didn't know she had an alias.
She has an alias.
Her funeral will be the funeral at that church, whatever that is.
So he notices that and obviously Stallone notices it.
So they both converge on that church.
If James Woods had been there and early enough, he would have run into Stallone.
It doesn't matter.
So wait, just, just out of curiosity.
So it just happened that her alias died at the same time that she was also killed.
This is where it falls apart.
What she says is that she took, that Sharon Stone went by a hospital and dropped her own
ID.
Somebody OD'd and she was able to make it seem as though that was her, but then that's
clearly not who's in the casket.
That's where the movie falls apart.
I see.
So whoever's in the casket is not Arlene the alias, certainly not May.
It's someone altogether different.
I believe so.
Wow.
Wow.
I believe so.
Wow.
Can it get Stallone to show up to the church?
Well, it does make sense because nobody else but those two people would know that alias.
So I guess the obituary, I guess it does.
I'll check out.
I don't think the woman who's being eulogized or who's being, I don't think her name matches
the alias.
I think the obituary announcement was a fake out.
Oh boy.
This is kind of complicated.
Yeah, it's confusing.
Yeah.
I also don't care that it doesn't make sense because it's a home run.
Yeah, it's fine.
I want to get back to the random acts of violence because there's one scene that I feel like
we weren't going to be able to talk about, which is Stallone on a bus.
Oh my God.
Oh my God.
I wrote it down.
It's my favorite quote of the movie after he beats that man up after, well, yeah, he
beats them all up.
He beats like five dudes up.
But he tries to give that lady the seat and then the guy like sits down and then he beats
them up and then he turns to that woman and goes, I believe there's a vacancy.
And in that moment, Nicole, in that moment, I was like, this guy is a straight up psychopath
because he didn't just like punch a guy and knock him out.
He kicks a man out of a bus window.
The man is jettisoned out of a bus window.
There's no way that bus is going to continue on its route.
And there, that's what I'm saying.
The bus is done.
You fucked up the whole day.
I would rather stand.
Everybody else on the bus, their whole day is ruined.
Why am I late for work and getting fired?
Because some asshole kicked a guy through a window of my bus.
I also, I also found it really funny that he always was on pay phones.
And obviously that's a different time than day before.
There's more pay phones, but I'll tell you where there's not a pay phone at the edge
of a dock.
Right.
There is one moment where she's like looking out.
There's like a, like a jetty.
Like it's about 20 feet off a larger dock.
It's like, where should we put the pay phone out there?
Maybe like it couldn't be, there's no way a lot, like no way phone lines are getting
out there.
And he's like, yeah, the very tip of the doggies.
I was like, that was my favorite shot him alone in a little pay phone.
Yep.
Who's using that?
I also liked before the fight.
He said, oh my God.
Cause he can't fight with sunglasses on.
I love this as a, as a like very inspired impression for you.
It is good.
Well, at one point I had to turn on the subtitles.
I was like, what the fuck are you saying?
I did that about 12 years ago.
Never turned them off.
Jason has got me into the subtitles.
What?
But Jason, you watch movies just for fun and enjoyment, not for this, but like subtitles.
Yeah, me too.
Gene, you always tell me about it.
It's a problem.
You always are saying, get it off.
It's a problem.
It's now conditioned me to look at the bottom of the screen in a way that I'm genuinely
missing visual filmmaking.
So strange.
Cause I'm like, oh, I got to read.
Jason, that's so weird.
Let's talk about the moment when, so Sharon Stone is telling Stallone about his plan.
Imagine the plan is this Sharon Stone finds a bomb expert, James Woods tells James Woods,
I need to kill these men.
James Woods like, I'll do that for you, but you need to get this person that I'm trying
to get.
So why don't you pretend like you don't have me, you get him the same way you got me.
And then I'll get my, my payment is me getting him and then we'll kill your people too.
Well, no, I don't know.
Cause James Woods is working for Rod Steiger.
But I think she did the same thing.
She reconned the first specialist cause he's also a specialist in how to work specialists.
Yeah, but how do you find the specialists on that bulletin board?
Well, on what, yeah, that seems to be their dark web thing.
I think it's go on the dark web and you can find somebody.
How do you even get that idea bombs?
It's absurd.
She literally says they're more precise than guns.
That's not true.
That's nobody's ever said that.
It's like that.
No one's ever said like, I want revenge.
I want to blow them up.
And so much so that she, her moment, her moment of like finally my job is done is to face Eric
Roberts while he explodes.
She's in the room with him while he is exploded to death.
And she says to Stallone afterwards, like, I knew your control.
Your explosions were so controlled that I would be just fine.
And I'm like, how?
What a rest.
She was too close.
By the way, again, not to, you know, let Stallone's got that cat in his apartment
or warehouse, gear house, but he also put that coffee cup in a tennis bag.
Cat's name is Timer.
Cat's name is Timer.
You know how I know that?
The closed caption he told me.
I also want to, I also want to go back to the first bomb in the brothel, the first
bomb in the brothel, the mini bomb, where the lowest tier guy that he has to kill.
He kills Brent Sexton from season four of Bosch, baby.
Yeah, Bosch.
Bosch is where it happens. I wrote that down too.
But I love it goes, you've been, you've been stealing from me.
You've been cooking the books.
And then the reveal is the whole month of September is gone.
Like, that's a shitty way to cook the books.
Like, you should be murdered.
You should be executed for that.
It's not like you're screaming a little at the top.
That's not trimming out the top.
That's just embracing one of the 12 months.
Can you imagine being like, oh, I didn't think you'd notice.
An entire month is gone.
And then the guy that kills him gets blown up by one of Stone's like mini bombs.
And his head goes through the aquarium.
Oh my God.
That made me laugh so hard.
It was a shoe in a head.
Incredible.
Give me more of that.
And who's shoe?
It's the loans at a bar talking to a sex worker.
And is it her shoe that also flies off?
No, it's the other woman's shoe.
She's fixing her shoe in a scene.
And I believe it is her shoe.
So she's at the bar.
Not so precise, by the way.
The vibration from the other room.
There's a lot of collateral damage in this room.
Yeah, there has to be.
They're bombs.
They're bombs.
And there doesn't seem to be any, like, aftermath.
Like, the bombs happen.
Everyone's like, back to work.
But this is what we see the entire time.
Like, James Woods is on a date with Sharon Stone.
Or not James Woods.
No, Eric Roberts is on a date with Sharon Stone.
He's like, hold on a second.
Let me beat the shit out of this guy in this cafe.
Like, there's multiple times he just walks away,
pulls out a knife, beats somebody up.
And it's like, no one reacts.
Like, no one in that bar is like, oh, yeah,
you just beat up my customer.
I was like, no, it's cool.
It's fine.
Like, there's just ultra violence going on in Miami.
Also, I was like, is this how I get into a relationship,
be like completely disinterested in the man
and like borderline mean to him.
And then I'll be like moved into a big fancy place.
Sharon Stone hated him.
Oh, yeah.
She sometimes gave him, like, I feel like the idea would be
like, look at him with like loving eyes.
And then when he turns back, fuck you.
But she gave the fuck you.
Yes, she wouldn't wait till he turns.
She'd be like, I love you.
I'll kill you.
Here's what I'm going to say.
Sharon Stone didn't need Sylvester Stallone.
He is terrible at his job.
She is so much better and has so many opportunities
to kill Eric Roberts.
She's like basically dating him seriously.
They are pre-engaged.
And she could have killed Eric Roberts at any point.
And she has access to him fully.
She doesn't even need Stallone.
She's better at Stallone's job than he is.
I think she just wants the bombs.
No, I think that she wants to get all three,
but she really didn't want to get all three
because it's all double cross.
I'm still a little confused about what she was up to
with James Woods and why that was necessary.
This is my plan.
So my plan is that she's like, oh God,
I need a bomb specialist.
And she goes on that weekend warrior thing.
James was like, hey, I'm your person.
Tells her the story.
He's like, I'll go down to Miami.
I'll set myself up there.
You pull out Stallone from the woodwork.
You do that.
So he's infiltrating that.
She's getting Stallone telling him the same story.
James Woods is like, I'm going to get you this.
It's a full plan.
I guess.
I'm just like, if I'm her, I'm like, can I just pay you?
And if not, like, I'll go back on the site
and try to find someone else.
James?
James, yes.
Basically, James Woods is using her to draw out Stallone.
And she's using James Woods to get access to the Rod Steiger,
Eric Roberts, the guys she wants to kill.
But I think I understand it.
James Woods is like, this is going to cost a lot of money.
But if you just pull out Stallone, I'll do it for free.
And Stallone's like, I'll do it for free if it checks all my boxes.
But it doesn't check all of his boxes.
I don't think Sharon Stone hired James Woods.
Well, no.
I think she did though.
Yes.
Because there is like the double crop.
Like, yeah.
Right.
Like he's like, my payment is you do this.
Yes.
But she's reneging on that because she's falling in love with Stallone.
Like, look, if all these guys die and I don't get Stallone, I'm killing you.
And that's like, that's the only thing he can really do.
I don't know that I ever believed she was in love with Stallone.
Maybe if James Woods read a line in the script,
we wouldn't understand the plot a little bit better.
Wait, you don't think they're in love as they ride away
and that 64 Mustang with what was the song that played?
That was unhinged.
It was like, back me up before I go go now.
Like, what was it?
That was turn the beat around.
Turn the beat around.
That was wild.
The craziest ending.
I feel like a bunch of saxophones and horn music.
This is the craziest ending of any movie ever made.
It reminded me of Grease when they fly away.
Yes.
Except this is at a boom.
Incredible.
What is happening?
And again, I love that she blows up Rod Stiger with a locket.
I doubt it.
And then she drives them away.
He's waiting in the car and she's like, let's go.
This is it.
This is the final scene.
Here we go.
I thought he was opening up candies, but it's...
He's like, oh, yeah, what is this?
Cheers, Rod Stiger!
How do you feel?
Better.
She's the hero.
Oh, this is wild.
This is irresponsible driving.
Go!
This is a movie about revenge, murder, and bombs,
and this is how it ends.
And by the way, I will say that Gloria Estefan's husband,
Emilio Estefan Jr. has a small part in this,
a piano player, and a few other members
of the Miami Sound Machine are in the film.
Did he also compose the music for the film?
Oh, yes, he did.
Yes.
Wow, way to go, June, knowing that little detail.
Let's quickly also just talk one second about this idea.
They set up, I Hate Knives.
Stallone hates knives.
That was weird.
But then when it goes into that very dark kitchen...
Oh, that was so funny.
He said before I fight, better turn off these lights.
Turns off all the lights in the kitchen
and what does he grab?
A knife and uses it effectively.
To set up, Indiana Jones goes,
I hate snakes, and then you put him in a situation
where he's surrounded by snakes.
He's like, oh, fuck, he's got to figure it out.
He's like, well, I mean, I hate knives, but I'll use it.
Not my preferred, you know.
Also, there was a sink of boiling water?
Yeah.
I was like, what are they cooking in this?
Potatoes?
It's so big.
And then when that man gets in it, he's like...
It made me laugh so hard.
There were so many moments that I had to pause it
and rewind it and be like, what the fuck happened?
I loved it.
I agree with you.
And I will say that this movie oddly moved fast
and very slow because at one point, at 45 minutes in,
I was like, shit, it's another hour in like 20 minutes.
I was like, because it's like, it is moving at a clip,
but it's almost like you're in quicksand.
It's like people are flailing, but it's not...
There were so many scenes that weren't needed.
We didn't need that bus scene.
No, the bus scene does nothing.
It doesn't move the plot, nothing.
And it's arguably, like, once again, bad for Stallone.
He shouldn't be making this much of a spectacle of himself
if he wants to remain quiet off the grid.
The reason he takes the bus is to be an invisible ghost,
but then he can't, like, clobber six guys on the bus.
Well, can I also say, and again,
I'm not trying to defend these gentlemen,
but I felt like...
It sounds like you are.
I know I'm against kids and punks,
but there's a moment where basically this guy
took another woman's seat, rude,
and then he goes, hey, can you get up?
He goes, fuck you.
It seems like the penalty was very high for that.
Like, it seems like to be kicked out of a bus window.
Again, I'm not saying it's good.
There was an open seat.
Where he came from was now an open seat.
I didn't see that.
She could have sat right here.
He slid right on over and left a seat for someone else to sit in.
This bit of violence was unnecessary.
It was unhinged.
I thought that guy was also harassing a young woman on the bus.
So there was that, but I did not realize there was an open seat.
Yes, a fully open seat.
Like, when he says that line, Nicole, that you said,
like, I believe there's a vacant seat.
Like, she should have been like, get away from me, you monster.
I just watched you kill three people on a bus
so that I could have a seat like that.
I don't want to be a part of your nightmare.
I want to see the after scene of that where it's like,
the bus is going to go.
And the bus is like, no, I have to file a report now.
But when that lady handed him back the glasses,
she seemed a little turned on.
The pregnant lady?
The lady, when she gave back the glasses, she was just like,
no.
Here are your glasses.
I think she liked it.
She didn't see any of his vascularity.
God.
Did anyone have any issues?
And we'll come to the audience for one second.
With Sharon Stone taking off all of her clothes
and sitting naked in like a chaise lounge.
Yeah, it was fucking weird.
What shocked me about that scene was, I was like,
oh, I think she's naked.
But then when she gets up and you see her breath,
I was like, oh, it was so unnecessary to see her naked in that scene.
Respectfully, I disagree.
Sharon Stone naked on the phone with Stallone,
trying to peep out the window to see if he's in the phone booth
across from her apartment was electric.
That's when he's in the dock phone booth.
That's when he's in the little baby dock.
I was saying to Paul, I was like, the idea of like coming home
to relax and just taking off your top and taking off your bra
and just sitting, you know, is so absurd to me.
I'm like, I get taking off your bra immediately.
What did you keep your shoes on?
No, it's just, it's so wildly uncomfortable
that I just kept looking at her and thinking like,
oh, put on a tank top, like just put on something that's,
we all know that's very uncomfortable.
I didn't realize her shoes were on.
That's so funny.
Oh, I got to free these titties,
but who got to keep the dogs locked up?
You're good.
You got to let people really breathe.
It also looks like she threw the dress in the trash can.
Like she's like that dress.
Her entire wardrobe is single use.
Like Tobin McGuire in his underpants.
I was obsessed with her wardrobe.
I was obsessed with everything she wore.
I loved the fact that she was in an evening gown and a scrunchie.
I, I wish, I loved it.
I wish everybody else was in this.
Well, James Woods might have been,
I was going to say was in the same movie that Sharon Stone is in.
Because she is firing on all cylinders.
And imagine if you will, this is what I was going to say earlier.
Imagine if you will, instead of an aged Sylvester Stallone
for this, you know, dynamic,
what if it was young Nicholas Cage as the specialist trained by,
or somebody, I don't know, somebody else, somebody younger, somebody.
Picture this scene with the two of them yelling then.
Well, talk to me.
You sell your service to the highest bidder.
Won't you, you stinkin' maggot.
These women are terrified.
Fuck you, wait, fuck you.
You killed me.
You did that, lady.
This one burns.
Your bombs.
I mean, 10, 15, 100 before you lost count.
Your bombs.
Who's he talking to?
By the way, look at this guy.
Oh, Jesus.
And by the way, this is like take 35.
James Wintz is just like, I'm going to go to my trailer for five minutes
and then I'm coming back and I'm going to be brilliant.
In Bogota, your bomb in the cabana.
But you're getting sloppy, right?
You broke your famous code, didn't you?
You killed an innocent person.
Can you pause right there for a second?
He's watching on the outside of his sleeve.
What's, what's happening?
Oh, my God.
God, that is so funny.
This is movie star shit.
Like they said to Stallone, we can't see your watch.
And he's like, fuck you, director.
I'll put it on the outside.
Like this is like a pissing contest.
He's mad.
God.
Oh, yo, I think the opposite.
I think Stallone is like, I want to be, I got to know it's a minute in.
I'm going to be traced.
So I need a watch.
And they're like, well, yeah, but it would be under all your clothes.
They'd be like, huh, put it outside.
I love it.
I really do hope it was like his choice.
You think you guys see it?
I think if, I think if it's 1994 and it's a semester.
I think everything is his choice.
Here, continue watching a little bit more James Lutz.
You killed an innocent bystander, Ray.
And it's just eating you up inside, isn't it?
Well, you were always too fucking sensitive.
But guess what? I'm coming, Ray. I'm coming to take all the pain away.
Can you pause for one second, Paul?
And I'm going to close you.
I believe they are in love.
More so than Sharon Stone and Sylvester Stone.
Because I believe my headcanon for this movie is that Sharon Stone is playing everybody.
Stallone, Woods, everybody.
Her parents.
She's the one that ratted them out to the Colombians.
She's like, this is exactly what I wanted.
Like, she seems to be the most capable person in this movie.
Because these two, Woods and Stallone are clearly involved in some sort of like nightmare decades-long romance.
Psychosexual something, yeah.
In my hand, I'm right behind you and I know you.
Yeah, right behind you.
He said, I'm going to hold your heart in my hand.
That's romance.
Time's up, 58 seconds.
Yeah, and I think Stallone might be the bottom in their relationship.
What is he doing? Why is he wrecking the recording?
I love that woman.
Terrified.
She's the only one reacting to the environment.
Just watch her, please.
Give her an Oscar.
Yeah, she's the only one.
I love her.
She's out acting James Woods on every level.
That's the shirt for the show, that woman's face.
Let's go to the audience to see what questions you all have.
Okay, in this movie, they hide bombs and lots of things.
Tea cups, cigarette cases, you know, bridges.
Where would you hide your bomb is my question to all of you.
And just ask me your question.
Raise your hand if you have a good question.
Anybody?
Oh yeah, right here.
What's your name?
Matt.
Matt, and where would you hide your bomb?
In an earpiece.
Ooh, that would be tricky.
In an earpiece? Damn.
All right, what's your question?
So at the end, the bomb truck explodes, did he have a bomb on there?
The entire movie just waiting for them to show up?
Oh, that is interesting.
Because at the end of the movie, everything.
Wait, what was it called?
So at the end, the bomb truck explodes.
Yeah.
So did he have a bomb, like, there, the entire movie in the bomb truck?
Like, because everything explodes at the end.
Underneath, or he seemed to have made the entire gear factory and its environs into a live bomb scenario.
I felt like he could explode anything in that area.
You know, the same way that he was somehow able to explode the top floor of that building.
He and James Woods seem to have the raw materials for the most subtle bombs on their person at all times.
But yet they're blowing up a fucking giant bridge when we meet them.
Like, it should have been like, he's leaving in that car with, like, they could have just, the way that this movie acts,
they could have blown up the drug dealer and the daughter would have been fine.
Because his bombs are so precise, it only gets the front seat.
You know, it's like, that's it.
But they decide to, like, rig two parts of the, like, that seems so wildly big.
The idea being that he used to do big bombs and now he does small bombs.
Because of what happened, if he could have only blown up the front seat, he's got to live with that.
And I will say, the damning look of that girl, that girl looks and like, you know, show me.
And you know, like, sometimes in movies you could tell, like, they couldn't make her that young,
because it would be, it would devastate us as an audience.
You know, but they couldn't make her, like, a preteen either.
Like, she was exactly the age where we were going to have to be okay with it.
See, I'm like, you know what? I don't love it.
But I'm cool if an 11-year-old dies.
They've lived 11 years. That's enough.
All right. Your name?
Melissa.
Melissa, welcome. Melissa, what, where would you put your bomb?
Definitely on that stinky-ass shower floor.
Yes. And your question?
Okay, sorry. Cut the sound if it's wrong.
But when James Woods was interrogating the Miami PD's bomb squad,
was that Greg Brady from the original Brady bunch?
Oh, somebody was thinking that too.
It looked a lot like him.
Let's say yes.
It looked a lot like him.
Great question. We'll never be cut out.
Don't ever correct it.
I don't want any correctional mission on the Discord about that.
It's Greg Brady. We all knew it. We all agreed to it.
Be cool.
This movie takes place in the Bradyverse.
That was Barry Williams.
And if anyone says differently, we will bomb you.
Okay, your name?
Nina.
Nina, and where would you put your bomb?
In the telephone booths.
Okay, great. Oh, nice. Cute.
You can put it in any... You don't have to put it in the movie.
You can put it anywhere.
All right. What's your question?
Okay, so there is a scene where Rod Steiger is trying to get up off the couch.
And the police, the police chief guy is helping him up.
Whose idea you think it was to keep that in the movie?
Well, Rod Steiger nails it with what is clearly an improvised line
where he goes, I hate these deep couches.
I hate these deep couches.
I love that this movie is taking a stand.
Give us shallow couches, or give us no couches at all.
All right. Well, we heard from the audience there,
and now it is time for second opinions.
Timer the cat, assassins you hire a nap.
I want you to hang up in 58 seconds.
This way he cannot be tracked.
XEIA hired by someone named May.
It turns out that Ned set up Ray, and bombs are their favorite way.
Oh, Stallone's a specialist.
You know I have no notes to give you.
Did you all get a boner too?
You know it gets a five-star review.
Amazon, this is true.
10, 9, 8, 7, 6, 5 stars.
Amazing.
Great work, you.
All right.
Let me tell you, these are second opinions pulled from Amazon,
and they are wild.
Wild, okay.
There are, this gets an average four out of five stars on Amazon,
where there's over 1,000 reviews.
76% are five-star reviews.
Wow.
But I'm going to kind of bullet through them,
because they are all one sentence.
So here we go.
There's a speed right through them.
Bob writes, reminds me of when I lived on the Miami River
on a 51-foot trawler, beautiful cinematography,
Sharon Stone isn't too bad either.
Five stars.
Amazon customer writes,
honestly, it's not a particularly great movie,
but it's got a Porsche 968 in it, so it's good enough for me.
Five stars.
DLG writes, critics did not rate this film well.
They must have been men, because this is a woman's fantasy.
Five stars.
And that sentiment continues when someone writes,
I enjoyed this movie.
Great bodies and beautiful people in a beautiful Miami setting.
Yes, it's a woman's movie in spite of the action.
What?
Five stars.
I get it.
I do get it.
It's because you're seeing Stallone's body all sexual and shit.
Yes.
I wouldn't call it a woman's movie, though.
Well, I think it's like the romance is for the ladies,
and that's like heavy in the movie,
and then the bombs are for the boys, so they stick around.
Jason, you missed people calling this a woman's movie
in the five-star reviews.
Well, I do feel like this exists in the fried green tomatoes verse.
Yeah.
It's like steel magnolias.
Steel magnolias, fried green tomatoes, the specialists.
It's a trilogy for the ages.
They've all got Roberts's in them.
A couple of fun facts about this movie.
Eric Roberts, only two years older than Sharon Stone.
But he was supposed to have killed her parents when she was a child.
Okay.
Stallone said the secret to their shower scene was
bringing a bottle of Black Death vodka up to the set
that was given to him by Michael Douglas,
and after a half a dozen shots, we were wet and wild.
I don't like that.
No.
Nope, nope, nope, nope, nope.
I don't like it from a safety standpoint.
Not at all.
That's why they were on the floor.
Yeah, they were like, we can't stand up anymore.
We can't stand up anymore.
We can't stand up anymore.
We can't stand up anymore.
So there's a real history in Hollywood about Stallone
being kind of tricked and conned by producers and other actors.
The most famously like Schwarzenegger read a really bad script
called Stop When My Mom Will Shoot,
and he's like, get the rumor out there that I want to do it,
so Stallone will try to steal it from me,
and then he'll do this real shitball movie.
And then he did.
And Stallone never wanted to do movies.
It's the fuck with him.
And it's been, like, they have a history.
So in this movie, like, Stallone was kind of playing hardball,
and the producer said, hey, look,
if you don't decide in 15 minutes, Warren Beatty wants to do this movie.
And he's like, all right, I'm in.
And Warren Beatty was never attached or anywhere near the movie.
How much did it make?
Well, I'll get to that in one second. How much it made?
Hey, guy, relax.
Wow.
He just really needs to know.
I've been watching this whole show. I want to know how much it made.
Fuck you, man.
It's not numbers.
Hey, log on to Box Office Log Show, guys.
He's got it here. It's a ball.
I didn't come here for jokes.
I came here from Box Office.
Bullshat.
Let's get the metrics going.
It's the data.
Give me a data dump.
Give me above the line and below the line costs.
Before tonight's first start.
You're an asshole, guy.
Wrap the show up.
I got a sitter.
Give me the Box Office and let me out of this place.
I'm done with this show.
I came from Box Office and I got buckets so far.
For some context, before the show started,
we played the trailer to the specialist.
And when Jason came out here, he said,
Paul, are you upset that James Woods did not get billing
in the sequence in the credits?
He's one of the lead characters in the movie.
There's a good reason for that.
Stallone demanded that James Woods' scenes
were to be cut out of the film.
And some of his scenes to be reshot,
so Stallone would have more screen time.
He was worried that Woods would steal the movie away from him
because he was a better actor than him.
And Stallone also did the same thing to Rucker Hauer on Nighthawk.
So that is the reason why...
Rucker Hauer was in two hawk-based movies?
Lady Hawk in the 90s.
And here's the thing that I found most interesting
before we get to how much it made.
Are you okay, my guy?
Are you okay to wait a couple more seconds?
Before there was a blacklist.
A blacklist is this amazing thing that Franklin Letter does
where he pulls people in Hollywood.
What are the best scripts that aren't made?
And there's a list, and it can help screenwriters
really get to the top of the heap.
It's just about who has a great script.
The Los Angeles Times did something similar to that.
And in 1993, the Los Angeles Times listed the specialist.
As the best unproduced thriller script in Hollywood
based on a poll of 40 agents, producers, and studio executives.
So this movie was a hot commodity.
And it had a budget of $45 million.
All your dreams are coming true!
Get ready!
We're talking those numbers!
We're talking those numbers!
We're talking those numbers!
We're talking those numbers, Paul!
What do we got? A budget of what?
$45 million.
Wow, wow, wow, wow! That's what I'm here for!
Yay! That was a space!
We're getting closer!
The opening weekend was 14.3.
Oh, God!
And the full domestic gross.
Oh, give the... dump it all on me!
Give me the whole fucking number, Paul!
$57.4 million.
Oh, God!
The worldwide gross...
$170 million.
Adjusted for inflation...
$347 million.
Wow.
That's like Avatar!
It came in number 21 in the top 200 films of 1991,
and that's the year where the Lion King,
Forrest Gump, and True Lies comes out.
This movie beat Time Cop, Disclosure, The Shadow,
Junior, Color of Night, Street Fighter,
Ghost in the Machine, and Double Dragon.
It beat all of those movies?
It came in number 21.
And the tagline is,
killing is his profession, revenge is her goal.
Together, they take on the battle against the Underworld Mafia.
Kind of got...
That's the longest tagline.
By the way, terrible tagline.
And here's the alt tagline.
The government taught him to kill.
Now he's using his skills to help a woman
seek revenge against the Lion King.
These are like poems. These are not taglines.
They're like,
Here's a better tagline.
She's hot, but inexplicably, he's naked.
She's hot, he's not. Boom.
Bye-bye.
Bye-bye would have been the best tagline.
Holy shit.
Bye-bye.
Well, well, well, we really got into the specialist.
Nicole, we have talked on our show about your show,
Grant Crew, which is amazing show,
on Peacock and Netflix.
Tell us a little bit more about it.
Oh, Grant Crew is about six friends
who hang out in a bar and we drink and we fuck
and we talk about life and relationships.
And it's like, it's silly.
It's a very silly throwback to the 90s.
It's a fun show.
It's a great ensemble.
And we talked to Phil and Carl on Last Looks.
Where are you on your wine drinking journey?
Oh, well, last night I drank half a bottle of wine
after I had like, I don't know, eight vodka sodas.
It was bad. It was bad.
I woke up this morning and I was like, I'm unwell.
And then went into my kitchen.
And then you had to watch this movie?
I'm so sorry.
I was so hungover just being like, well, this is good.
It was honestly really nice to watch it hungover.
That's the way that they shot the shower scene.
Yeah, more or less.
And Nicole, anything else you can, you want to plug?
Oh, yeah, I got podcasts.
Why won't you date me?
Best friends, 90 day bay.
I'm like working out material in DC and Denver.
And you could just go to my Instagram
and hit the link in the bio.
I don't know the dates.
I love it. That's great.
June, I know you and I are very excited about this show
that we're on Moon Girl and Devil Dinosaur and Disney Plus.
It's actually fantastic.
It's a great show.
Really, really fun.
I'm so excited.
And also, Paul, you'll be at it.
Bitch Sesh and the Deep Dive is hosting a show
slash pickleball tournament slash extravaganza
called I'd hit that on May 13th.
So if you're in Los Angeles or traveling to Los Angeles
and you want to buy tickets,
you can head to janeclub.com slash pickleball
and come to the show.
Paul will be our celebrity DJ and MC
and it's going to be so much fun.
Jason.
I will shout out, even though I'm not in it,
John Wick 4.
Get involved.
Wait, you went to a movie theater?
Nope.
Oh, wow.
Don't worry about it, but go see this movie.
Can you?
I can't afford the three.
I can't find those three hours.
I need to talk to your source.
God damn it.
Also, I play a recurring part in the Netflix show
Agent Elvis that is an animated show.
I was cut out of that show.
What's that?
I was cut out of that show.
Really?
I recorded, I was recording my voice and I was like,
they're going to cut me.
I wasn't doing whatever they wanted me to do
and I've had this experience twice in my life
and I was feeling it.
And then like a couple months later,
we're going to recast you in that.
Well, listen, it sounds like we're still in Moon Girl.
And they have a dinosaur.
Yes.
I will say congratulations on the pickup of lower,
Star Trek, lower decks, which is fantastic.
And I will, I will please urge people to watch
Star Trek Prodigy, the show that I am on,
which is absolutely fantastic and needs your eyeballs.
Get involved.
And I'll also say, if you like Star Trek Picard season three,
don't worry about one and two.
It's great.
But more importantly, Dungeons and Dragons,
the movie is good.
You saw it there.
Okay.
Right.
I hate medieval shit.
It makes me like really upset.
Yeah.
But I was not upset watching that movie.
It's a fucking comedy.
It's really funny.
It's really funny.
It's really good.
Dungeons and Dragons.
Why does medieval shit make you upset?
Oh, it makes me so mad.
Because I could just imagine how stinky they are.
Oh, yeah, I get that.
I don't like that like there's no like hems.
Everything's like jagged and nasty.
And they got stupid fucking belts
and there's like rocks everywhere.
I agree.
The belts are stupid.
I don't know.
I'm not here for it.
I agree with you that they made medieval stuff look nicer.
It was, it was better.
It was, yeah, it was.
But the jokes made me happy.
I was like, these people look like trash,
but like it's funny and I'm not angry.
A lot of funny, funny jokes.
Really great surprise.
They make a choice with this dragon that made me laugh so hard.
I don't want to ruin it.
They have a cameo in it that was shocking
and the scene plays out like this drama
in the middle of this comedy movie.
It's beautifully done.
Anyway.
Wait, can I say one last thing?
Yeah, please.
I thought it was really interesting.
When they were running at the end
and the bombs were going off like in front and behind them,
Sharon Stone yelped every time a bomb went off.
Yeah.
And I was like kind of concerned.
I was like, are these happening too close to her?
Did they rehearse?
I was like, did they tell her?
Well, I kind of liked it because it gave me
like a human reaction to bombs.
Like this movie is like bombs go off all the time.
Like it's like a doorbell.
Like she's like, oh fuck.
Like she, she, she should be jumping.
Another, just a tiny bit of evidence
that this is really a love story between Stallone and Woods
is the, you're the rigor, I'm the trigger.
That is the most romantic line in the movie.
That's what the movie's about.
You're the rigor, I'm the trigger.
James Woods is saying in the whole movie,
why don't you see I'm in love with you?
You're the rigor, I'm the trigger.
Should that be the shirt?
Yeah.
Yeah, that may be it.
You're the rigor, I'm the trigger
and the silhouette of both their faces.
I love this.
Nicole, so great to have you back.
Hey, would you recommend the movie?
Oh, oh, oh, oh.
But before we go.
Hey, lady.
But before we go, would we recommend the box office?
Sometimes I feel like this question is,
we've already gone through it.
Yeah, I mean, I think that's clear.
Yes.
Yes.
Would we recommend the movie?
Absolutely.
Great.
Give it up for our amazing crew up in the booth.
We have a producer, our sound engineer,
got new live engineers up there.
It's an amazing group.
They put the show together every week.
Thank you for coming.
Thank you, Nicole.
Thank you, June.
Thank you, Jason.
We'll be back in April for a three-night run
and then back in May and come see Dinosaur April 15th.
Thank you, everybody.
Good night.
The show may be over,
but it continues next week on Last Books.
That's right.
We invite you to join us on Last Books to tell us all the things
that we might have messed up, that we might have gotten wrong,
and you get a chance to prove that you are better than us.
You can do that very simply by going to our discord.discord.gg
slash HDTGM, or you can call me at 619-PAUL-ASK.
I also run a very impromptu advice line.
So if you have any problems, I am there to solve them.
Normally, I'm joined by Jason on Last Books,
so tune in to Last Books to hear interviews
with some of our great past guests,
some deleted scenes, and so much more,
including what we're watching next week.
You know what?
If you're a big how-to-skip-made fan,
that means you must have some merch.
And if you need our merch, go to teepublic.com
slash stores slash HDTGM.
That's TEE, public.com.
You can find us online everywhere
on any kind of social platform at HDTGM.
And if you really just want to go old school,
check out our website at HDTGM.com
that has links to everything you could possibly imagine.
But this show, what you're listening to right here,
couldn't be done without a couple of things.
First of all, you listening, but more importantly,
I'm talking about the amazing producerial work
of Scott Sonny, Molly Reynolds,
and our movie-picking producer, Averill Halley,
our engineer, Alex Gonzalez, and our publisher, July Diaz.
People, they make the trains run, and we love them.
So we will see you next week for Last Looks,
and until then, bye for now.