How Did This Get Made? - Troll 2 (w/ Adam Scott)

Episode Date: September 20, 2024

After almost 14 years of covering bad movies, we finally tackle one of the best worst movies of all time... 1990's Troll 2! HDTGM all-star Adam Scott (Severance) returns to help discuss all the gooey green goblin madness including the pee dinner scene, the daughter weightlifting, the dad's everchanging pajama buttons, the bologna sandwich, Lady & the Tramping a corn cob, and so much more in the town of Nilbog. Plus, a few very special guests stop by to help with second opinions. GEOOOOCORNNNN! We're coming to NYC on Nov 15th & Philly on Nov 16th! Go to hdtgm.com for ticket info, merch, and for more on bad movies.Order Paul’s book about his childhood: Joyful Recollections of TraumaFor extra content on Matinee Monday movies, visit Paul's YouTube page: youtube.com/paulscheerTalk bad movies on the HDTGM Discord: discord.gg/hdtgmPaul’s Discord: discord.gg/paulscheerFollow Paul’s movie recs on Letterboxd: letterboxd.com/paulscheer/Check out new HDTGM movie merch over at teepublic.com/stores/hdtgmPaul and Rob Huebel stream live on Twitch every Thursday 8-10pm EST: www.twitch.tv/friendzoneLike good movies too? Subscribe to Unspooled with Paul and Amy Nicholson: listen.earwolf.com/unspooledSubscribe to The Deep Dive with Jessica St. Clair and June Diane Raphael: www.thedeepdiveacademy.com/podcastCheck out The Jane Club over at www.janeclub.comWhere to find Paul, June, & Jason:@PaulScheer on Instagram & Twitter@Junediane on IG and @MsJuneDiane on TwitterJason is not on social mediaGet access to all the podcasts you love, music channels and radio shows with the SiriusXM App! Get 3 months free using the link siriusxm.com/hdtgm and code HDTGM.

Put down your devil drink, tighten your belts, and summon your dead grandpa. Because we're going to Goblin Town. We saw a troll too, so you know what that means. Let's follow in the mediocrity of subpar art. Perhaps we'll find the answer to the question, how did this get made? Hello, people of Earth, and hello, people of the internet. Welcome to How Did This Get Made's virtual livestream in conjunction with MoveOn.org.

We have a great show for you tonight. This movie, in 1990, this film was released into the world and there is a lot of debate about this film. Is it the best worst movie of all time? It's a sequel to a film called Troll, but there's no relation to that film by director, characters or anything. This movie was called Goblin.

Now, if you want to know what the premise of Trolltunus is, I kind of pulled this off the internet here. I thought this would be good. Wikipedia says, when young Joshua learns that he'll be going on vacation with his family to a small town called Nilbog, he protests adamantly. He is warned by the spirit of his deceased grandfather that goblins populate the town. His parents, Michael and Diana, dismiss his apprehensions but soon learn to appreciate their son's warnings. Guided by his grandfather's ghost, will Joshua and his family stand a chance in fighting off these evil beings? That is the premise of the film.

I mean, perfectly said, really. I think this movie is really an expose. It really highlights the villainy veganism, shows you that. That's really what this movie is getting at. The vegetarians need to be defeated. And you know what? To break down this film,

to get into all the nitty gritty goodness, and I don't even know if that's quite possible, I have to introduce my two co-hosts. Ladies and gentlemen, please welcome Jason Manzoukas. Yes! Yes! Yes! Let's go! Here we go! Wow!

What's up, jerks? Yes! Who we? Jason. Paul. Troll 2. Where do you fall? I'm not gonna lie to you.

I'm not gonna lie to you. Never seen this movie. We have just watched Troll. I watched this entire movie and was flummoxed that this was not a sequel to the movie we watched. This, I believe, is a movie called Troll 2. I'm not gonna lie to you. I've never seen this movie.

I've never seen this movie. I've never seen this movie. I've never seen this movie. I've never seen this movie. I've never seen this movie. I've never seen this movie. I've never seen this movie. I've never seen this movie. I watched this entire movie and was flummoxed that this was not a sequel to the movie we watched. This, I believe, is a movie called Goblins. That is all it is. There's not a troll in this goddamn movie. What the fuck is going on?

No, it's aggressively troll-less. Oh, man, that gave me a panic attack. I kept being like, where's Harry Potter? Where's all this stuff that I know is troll? No, yeah, there is nothing from that first film, I kept being like, where's Harry Potter? Where's all this stuff that I know is Troll? No, yeah, there is nothing from that first film, but that first film was such a moderate success. They were like, we have to call this Troll 2.

Like we got to- Yeah, this just reeks of, they had a script for something called Goblins, and we're like, fuck it, it's called Troll 2 now. Put it out, go. For the irony of it is, I believe that Troll 2 now, put it out, go. For the irony of it is, I believe that Troll 1 was a film shot in Italy based in America, and Troll 2 is a film made by Italians in America.

So that's about it. Is it really? You're telling me everybody in this movie was Italian? No, all of the odds. And that's why those performances were like this. The writer and director. They learned everything phonetically. There's so much to get into.

But first, let's talk about a woman who on previous episodes have said, we gotta talk about the color green, and I'm sure it will also come up here tonight. Miss June Diane Ray, if you'll welcome June. Hi. Hi. Hi, Paul. Hi, Jason. Hi, everyone. Hi, viewers and guests alike. The first thing

I want to say, and then we will get into it and we'll start the show, but I know MoveOn has so much work to do across these United States, but after watching this movie, I realized we have a lot of work left to do. You know what? It's starting to feel like we're all living in Nilbog. Yeah, like we have, there's more, there's a lot more meat on the bone. You know, if this- Yeah, we think we're through it. And then this, and then we see something like this,

and I'm like, God, I'm never gonna get out of doing this goddamn show. I mean, God, I'm never gonna get out of doing this goddamn show. I mean, look, I just took a little peek at that new Dennis Quaid movie, Reagan, that came out. I'm like, wow, they're still making them. They're still making movies. He did a bio pic about the Australian breakdancer? Rick Gunn, yes, yeah.

Well, let us ask, I have to say something and I want to be... Thank you Adam. You brought an Adam before his dance, we got to introduce Adam. Bring him on, bring him on. Bring him out. All right, all right, I'll bring him out. A biopic about the Australian breakdancer starring Dennis Quaid. Oh my God.

Ladies and gentlemen, Adam Scott and How Did get made all-star back on the show Adam? You were so missed in our fast 10 discussion You're away shooting and we have missed you on the show many times So we're so excited to have you here for such a big big night a big show So thank you for being here with us. Well, thank you for having me you guys. You know, I, I knew I thought I'd seen Troll 2. And then I sat down the other day to actually watch it and went through and I own it. It is on all of my devices. As it turns out, it's just been sitting there for like 15 years. So I realized this movie, I realized I actually watched the documentary Best Worst Movie,

which is fantastic and made by the boy in the movie. Like, uh, Joshua. Yeah, Michael is the actor's name. Let's just call him The Boy. OK, well, The Boy. The Boy from the movie. And he made an amazing documentary, which I think everyone needs to see after you're done with this episode, because it's really beautiful.

And that's what I realized I'd watched. I'd never actually watched the film. So, wow. It really, and by the way, they work in either order. I love the idea that people are watching that documentary and then there's gonna be people who probably listen to this podcast, but don't actually get to the source material.

We will play plenty of clips tonight, because I think this is a film worthy of clips. I'll be honest, just watching the trailer right now, as you played it, Paul, that's essentially most of the movie. We want that trailer had to be seven minutes long. It's like that trailer plus just like an hour and a half of shoe leather. And that's the movie.

Oh, every, they show us every bit of travel. If they're going from here to there, you're seeing every step of the way, every jog, every, they show us every bit of travel. If they're going from here to there, you're seeing every step of the way, every jog, every... They watch, we watch that kid stretch before he jogs into town. What? That's right. We really did watch that teen boy stretch. This movie, what's so interesting about it too, is like, you know, it's a low budget film

and it's the first time I've ever seen driving scenes where they're not like on a process trailer, like they really are driving. So the actors can't really take their eyes off the road. Like they're what he's trying to do with lines over his shoulder, but he, he, those eyes are like, we'll crash the car. But I'm so excited.

I'm so excited tonight. Hold on one second. I'm gonna take a quick clip. Wait, no, Paul, no. Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. Wait, I was about to say. Don't drink it. Don't drink it. Don't drink it.

Oh, I just had it. Was this here? Okay, well, I'll get back to it in a second. It does feel like everything in the movie is taking place during like when Shamrock shakes are being sold. Like it was the green was so green as to make me feel as though it was part of Irish mythology or something.

Well, you know what I have to say? This is what's really weird about the movie. Like, we're going to get into so much. This is it. This is what's weird about it right now? Well, this is the only thing. This is the only thing that's weird and struck me. They are so hungry. And I'd love to talk about the timeframe of the movie

and how long the movie takes place over, but they have not eaten. And the food that is presented to them, that the goblins present to them, is so disgusting looking. So gross. So gross. It is so, it's babes and then green.

It's like the worst supermarket cakes that you would ever see. It's like, oh. Cakes and pud all like, cakes and puddings and just goo. And they're like, it's delicious. And everything has writing on it. Everything has writing on it. Enjoy, or this or that. Everything.

A lot of piping. It feels like, yeah, a lot of piping, a lot of amateur piping, and everything feels like it's also on an episode of like, is this cake? Yes. You know? Well, let me tell you this.

We got so much to unpack. Let's get into it. This movie starts with, I mean, really, it reminded me of a Princess Bride. I mean, this is like a Peter Falk. Exactly. A Peter Falk in Little Kid Story. I feel like Grandpa Seth is even doing Peter Falk's cadence.

You know? Yes. The weirdest thing is like when it, you know, it starts off and you see this like little Pied Piper running in the forest. But the weird thing is, is like the boy interrupts the story and the grandfather's like, listen. And then a closeup on the grandfather's lips,

which I've never seen done when it's not like supposed to be sexy. Like I've only seen it on lips. When it's not a grandpa's lips. Oh, yeah. Oh, and he's not, grandpa's lips. Oh yeah. Oh, and he's not, it's like, as if these are the most important words.

It's also, it's a closeup on his lips sideways. It's not like a closeup like this. It's like. And bearded as well. It's very weird. Let me ask a question about grandpa Seth real quick. And I, I actually, I'm gonna say it, I'm gonna be very honest and open and vulnerable right now.

And just say, yeah, I'm gonna be very, very open and speak my truth, which is that I don't quite understand the difference between a goblin and a troll. Oh, June, I'm so happy you said this because- I don't quite know what the difference is between the two. Molly, our amazing producer Molly, thought that this might come up and she pulled something that I have access to

called the Folklore Creatures Cheat Sheet. So if you'd like to know, I could tell you by definition what a goblin in a troll is, or you can guess. I don't know that I wanna know. The FCCS? Yeah, I've got one of those. I guess, well, let me ask you this. Let me ask a follow-up question.

Well, what I was gonna ask about Grandpa Seth was I couldn't understand throughout the movie why Grandpa Seth had taken us through this entire journey and why they were intent on doing this area had taken us through this entire journey. And just why they were intent on doing this Airbnb exchange and living the life of farmers and their ancestors on the land and why grandpa Seth was foregrounding the,

was he a troll or a goblin at some point? And why did the goblin, why did the troll goblin say that he'd been in, he was in hell? Like I didn't understand, I didn't understand what the trolls and the, I guess trolls, because let's be honest, we're gonna say troll, but there is no mention of trolls in the entire movie. It's just goblins.

So I didn't understand how the goblins were related to like the idea of heaven or hell. They seem to be folkloric beings from fairy tales, but are somehow snapping people to and from hell? But grandpa Seth literally says this, he's like almost dying right before he tosses that Molotov cocktail lightning bolt at the vegan preacher.

He says, I wasn't really in hell. Like he's like, don't believe that. By the way, the rules for seeing grandpa, for grandpa appearing aren't clear and or consistent. Like sometimes it's the mirror, but the first time we see him in a mirror isn't until like 40 minutes into the movie, It happens twice. And then he looks into another mirror to try and summon him and he doesn't appear again in a mirror for the rest of the movie. We introduce you to him. He's in a chair, a rocking chair. And then sometimes he's like hiding behind the outside of a window. Why isn't he in the house? Like, sometimes he is taking the place of another actual corporeal human being, i.e. the hitchhiker. Like when Joshua says, I'm going to throw up, I'm going to throw up.

I'm sorry, when the boy, when the boy says, I'm going to throw up, I'm going to throw up, he gets out of the car and he runs directly to the, to the hitchhiker. And it's just grandpa Seth's face. Um, he's having like this. I was deeply worried for the boy. Yes, at this point. Well, I was worried for the boy too because of the way that our parents were handling the boy's grief.

Oh, Jen. Oh, man. I really, you know, and especially the mom who I could talk about for roughly the next two and a half hours. Yes, indeed. Both of those parents. Both of those parents. Horrifying.

I also need to go ahead, please. Well, just quickly, I need to talk about the reveal of dad. I need to talk about his pajamas. I need to talk about dad's pajamas and how they are constantly being more and more unbuttoned. And collar up MPJs. For every $50,000 we raise, I will unbutton one more button until I'm full dad pajama. But not only that, but he also has his leg up too. It is such a sexy pose.

It's going to take like $350,000 to get that low. It is just taking sexy poses. It's gonna take like $350,000 to get that low. He is taken, he is in such a state, like he looks like he is ready, like ready for love. I mean, and his wife looks like she has been already possessed by the goblins. Like from moment one to the end, she's definitely feels like it also definitely feels to me as though the dad, the actor is constantly being like, I think we've been fooling around, you know? And then they're like, no, no, no, no,

that's not what this is. And then he's like, between takes, because there's the first scene where he's wearing, there's two scenes where he's wearing pajamas. The first scene, there's two different angles and in one he's buttoned up and in the other he's buttoned completely open. Like he's playing the scene his way, which is you know

It's like when Jeff Bridges said to the common brothers on the big Lebowski before every take Do you think the dude burned one before in the car on the way over this guy's like I think we were just But he has all these ideas, but then the camera turns on and he freezes up and does what he did in the movie. Here's the thing. The opening line of The Dad really does feel like you're watching the worst improv scene of all times. Like, yeah, okay, great. So we'll do business and we'll make sure that that thing is business is done.

All right, great. Well, we'll see you. Okay. Well, make sure that that thing is business is done. All right, great. Well, we'll see you. Okay, I was actually obsessed with that because I kind of was concerned about that business because it is so vague and they're going on this vacation. Now they are also, this family fascinates me because they are in grief. We have learned- Well, how long did the grandpa die?

Six months. Six months, okay. It's been six months, but for some of us, that's no time. I agree. I think that... He seems like a big part of their lives. Grandpa Seth seems like he was a big part of their lives, and they're dealing with it differently.

And his daughter literally don't give a shit except for the little boy. His daughter says... Well, the daughter is getting jacked. The daughter's getting jacked, I'm assuming, in order to fight death. Right. Wait, I wanna talk about the daughter. I just wanna-

She has so much weight. She has so much exercise equipment in her room. And she's lifting weights. They cut away for like 20 minutes to come back. She's still pumping iron. Same exercise. Only upper body work. Same exercise. Only upper body.

And again, camera lingers where? The sexiest part, the neck, that part of the neck. Just right there, the nape of the neck. Well, that's the sweat collector. When you're lying back on the bench, that's where you get a shot glass full of sweat, Paul. I mean, I've talked about cum gutters before. I don't know if that's sweat gutters up top.

That's the guy, cum gutters on the bottom. Yeah, those sweat gutters up top. I'll tell you this, I laughed the hardest when it was poster of Johnny Depp, poster of Tom Cruise, image of a Smurf. Yep. You know what? I actually, I would thought about that later on when she's having our conversation with Elliot, the boyfriend, Elliot, and she's, first of all, she switches gears so quickly with him. I couldn't, I couldn't follow where she was. Poor guy.

But, poor guy, but at some, at a certain point in that bedroom scene with him, she does seem to wanna have sex with him. Oh, big time. I think, okay. Can we watch clip two? Can we watch clip two and just see it, She does seem to want to have sex with him. Oh, big time. I think, okay. Can we watch clip two? Can we watch clip two and just see it?

Just like, let's enjoy it for a second. Here, go. This is the scene. I like you. But my family doesn't like you. They say you're good for nothing and they spend way too much time with your friends. Oh, oh, but I swear I never see them.

Elliot, how long is this gonna take? We're sick of waiting for you. Don't you want to come to Tenino's with us, Holly? Don't you want some pizza? Man, these are cute. These are cute. Hey! Hey! Do you see?

What's wrong with having friends? Nothing. If you want to remain a virgin for life, you take them to bed with you too. and I don't believe in group sex. Is it true that your family is going on vacation tomorrow? Yes. I'll come with you? Okay, I'll tell my father that you're coming with us tomorrow.

Where are we going? Neelbog, a wonderful half-empty town. Half empty? It's an exchange. A family from the country is coming to live here, and we're going to live in their house. Oh, Elliot, it will be wonderful. You and me in the woods, this time we'll be able to be together for sure.

Yeah. You said it. It is, Adam, half empty. I mean, half empty is, like, why do they know this? Let me ask this question, though, Paul. Like, so this is a big storyline throughout the movie. And the fact that he wants to be with friends,

that he has too many friends. This is a big issue for them. And I couldn't help but wonder, number one, why do they, truly, why do they care that he has friends? Yeah, why does that? Why? Doesn't that, that do they care that he has friends? Why? Yeah, why does that, doesn't that, that would seem to me to be like, oh, he's got a group of friends, like they're social,

unless they're being shown to be demonstrably bad kids, but they're not. Which they are not, they're goofy kids, but then also, why does he have those friends around him all the time? This is, I think there's a little bit of gay panic in here. Cause she's like, you are a homo because you're hanging out with your friends.

Like basically like- But also her dad, his biggest criticism is that he's always hanging out with those friends. That's like, that's the reason the parents don't like him either is that he's not making her the priority. I'm not sure what it is. It doesn't make any sense because honestly,

Elliot and his friends seem like perfectly lovely doofuses. You know? They're knuckleheads, they're real knuckleheads. Poor Arnold. Poor Arnold who gets turned into a tree and cut down with a chainsaw. Arnold deserved it. These fucking dorks. Arnold deserved it.

Arnold deserved it. These fucking dorks. My favorite scene. We'll talk about it when we get there. I wish the movie was about them. I wish the movie was about the four idiots in the RV. Where'd they get the RV? There's so many questions about that RV.

I wish I had 15 minutes of them just finding and getting the RV. But Jason, I actually, but I thought at a certain point in the movie, I was like, oh, they already had this RV. They've... Yeah. Because they've personally settled there. But yet they said that they kept them waiting 90 minutes,

but then they're ahead of them. So the boyfriend clearly left earlier than them. No one's communicating anything. Like, the boyfriend then, he does want to be with her. He just forgot to tell her that he left early because they're on the side of the road seeing them. It makes like, I can't figure out if this guy's a dick or if he's not. Like normally these movies,

they let you know one way or the other. Like Adventures of Babysitting, when it's like Bradley Whitford, you know, we know he's kind of a bad dude. You know, here, like we don't know. But the dad, I think he's kind of a bad dude. You know, here, like we don't know. But the dad, I think he does have that RV because the dad sees the RV from like three quarters

of a mile away and is like, it's your boyfriend with his no good friends. Like it is super far. So he knew, knows exactly who it is. And I was wondering as far as the gay panic goes, are they trying to infer that these guys, because they wake up in the bed, the two guys are in a small bed without clothes on waking up in the morning together?

Are they actually trying to infer that they are actually gay together? No, right? They're just trying to- No, because they're also trying to deflower people because when they hear that scream, they're like This town full of like the town of 25. Yes 25 well sheriff but but there is I was just gonna say there's one moment that Did make me think that the guys were fucking each other in the RV because because it's when she shows up around the corner of the RV Holly the

daughter and she's walking and she's big mad and she's gonna say her piece and he comes out of that RV looking there's no other way to say it, but freshly fucked. Yes. He's looking disheveled and hiding something behind there. I did not know how to read that scene. You saw it too, Adam? 100% I thought these guys were all fucking each other in the RV.

Interesting. This is an open time. This is the 80s. People are trying stuff. 100% I thought these guys were all fucking each other in the RV Interesting. This is an open time. This is the 80s. I love it trying stuff. They're having fun It's not even we don't have to label it. It's Polly. It's just fun. It's a polycule in there. That's wonderful You can't find a girl. You sleep with your friend We're doing vacation swaps. Right? We love it. We love it. Listen, if our V's are rockin', don't come a-knockin'. By the way, just to go back to them going on this fucking trip in the first place, they want to go, the dad really wants to go to their ancestors, their farmers and peasants,

just like our ancestors. But the people who they're doing the house swap with are complete strangers, right? They aren't family, am I right about that? This is where our family- They seem to be like stymied again, when they realized that the people have not left the town and are still there.

I guess my question is this, why is it so complicated for these goblins? Like, it's like, they're setting up so much systems, like just throw the spear, the wooden spear at them. Like, why do they have to, why all this? Yeah. I have even a bigger question. I want to pull out even further because I,

and again, I could have misread this. We know that that's possible, But I believe this movie is about, you said it in the beginning, these goblins having to eat plants and having to eat vegetation. And so what they do to feed on, to feed themselves, so what they do is they end up turning these human beings made of meat into vegetation that they can eat.

And then they remember that why not just eat plants? I felt like, cause it worked in different ways, right? Arnold gets turned into a tree that needs to be cut down. The girl that Arnold is chasing turns into a puddle of goo. Yeah. But I felt like, oh, are the humans, are they using the people as like manure? Arnold is chasing turns into a puddle of goo. Yeah. But they eat that puddle of goo. I felt like, oh, are the humans, are they using the people as like manure, basically,

as something that the plants can grow out of? But no, because sometimes the people just turn into a puddle of green goo that they start eating. They eat the goo. So I don't know. And that goo is not vegan, it's made of melted people. That's right. No, I think that, I think that like,

what they're talking about, well's made of melted people. That's not vegetables. No, I think that, like, what they're talking about, well, first of all, sap in this movie, everything that's sap is green, which I don't think that's the color of sap. Again, I'm no botanist, but sap is green in this movie, and I think when they give them a bite of the plant life, their bodies, it runs through their system system and then their body turns to plant. So that's why they're sweating green, green is pouring down, they become plant roots.

Well, the grandfather, grandpa Seth, when he's talking to the boy says chlorophyll at the beginning of the movie as the only, I feel like, word that gives us a sense of like, oh well of course, chlorophyll. Right, chlorophyll green. It's bizarre because it's like everything is so green. I'm sorry. Oh, eat that. That's a different one.

Paul, that's a different drink. It's green. It's not. Oh my God. Oh wait, I'm sorry, I'm sorry. No, no, no, no, no. I'm so sorry. Oh no. It's too late, it's too late you guys. Yeah, I got confused. I'm so sorry. Oh, no.

It's too late, you guys. Yeah, you didn't adjust it. Oh, God. But it is, but I guess my question is this. They want to kill humans. Easy peasy. But why do they have to trick them with these elaborate meals? When they check into that house, there's like a whole buffet set up in the house,

or not even buffet, a full dinner. Oh, wow. This scene. Well, they would have eaten it except that Grandpa Seth arrives on the scene with time freezing powers, FYI. Yes, yes. And incentivizes the boy to dot dot dot piss on the food.

Piss. So when those people wake up, let's keep in mind, we cut away from the boy on the table opening his pants. When these people wake up, they wake up mid-bite and their son slash brother is standing on the table pissing all over them. I mean this movie, this is awesome. He doesn't tell him to piss. That's the thing I rewatch,

because he doesn't say like, he's like, you have to stop them. Then the boy, I'll be honest, that was my first impulse. One hundred percent. I immediately, I got to it quicker than the boy. The boy, he has 30 seconds. I've never seen anyone take a 30 second more relaxed. He's like, huh, walks around, looks at it. Like, 30 seconds is clicking down.

And we're with him the whole time. I would like to eat the food and throw it out. We are with him the entire time. Take it out, pick it all up. Run it outside. Right. Throw it out in the garbage. Nope.

And he's like, pissed. Now, what I imagine happens, because I've seen cuts, he must have pissed on them like a firehose. Yeah. Like, it couldn't have just been, I'm pissing on the table. It had to get on the corn that the daughter's eating.

And you know that kid's not hydrated enough. He's too young to, he's not hydrated. There's no way. Right. That's not a huge bladder. Yeah, no. No. Let me tell you this.

They've been in the car for a long time. That's true. The rest of the movie, every member of the family should be like, remember what you did yesterday? That should be the most important thing that's happened to them up until that point and in the future. You're absolutely right.

Literally, you stood on the table and pissed all over dinner. What is wrong with you? If I had a child who, on a vacation, stood up on top of the table and pissed all over our food, we are, the vacation's over. 100%. That's yesterday's news, that's done.

We pack up immediately and we check him into some sort of a facility. Yes. Now, here's what I will say about that. Things have gone bad. And I think this whole family is slow to react. I mean, you know, like we said, they don't deal with trauma well. The mom says in the beginning, you must banish the memory of your grandfather.

Banish! Well, she also makes him say a sentence that no child would ever know, which is, Grandpa Seth is just an invention of my subconscious. Which he isn't, technically, he is a child, that child should be taken away from her. So that is crazy. He pisses. Well, it's even crazy though, sorry, Paul, but it's just, it's also crazy that they are going on this sort of working vacation to process their grief

and their loss of Grandpa Seth. I don't think that that's part of it. Then she says that. She says that that's why we're going. She says that's why we're going so that we can, you know, try to move forward. And it's like, wow, you didn't want to go to like a sans or you know. Right, you go't want to go to like a sans or, you know.

Right, you go to where your farmer ancestors live. But also you want to become a farmer for a month? That seems like a terrible idea. Go someplace with a pool. She brings it up with the dad and the dad's like, he thinks grandpa is still here. And the dad's like, yeah, I had an imaginary friend when I was a kid. Like, they don't give a shit.

What year is this, Paul? What year is this? 1990. 1990, when you look on the poster on the wall, there is a poster of Michael Keaton and Batman. Also, this kid's the worst sports fan in the world. He's got so many opposing... He's got teams that are enemies on the wall. Like, there's too much... they've got no rights to any

of the major league baseball, but stuff too much stuff. I will say this though. Um, here's my thought. I'm the daughter. I'm meeting my corn. My brother starts pissing on the table. I'm just going to pull back. I'm just going to eat that corn. Yeah. Well, like that point he might... But Paul, in that 30... So here's what I imagine, that in the 30 seconds, he managed to spray. He managed to get everywhere.

I think he has to get everything. Which means, let's be clear, because they're all holding food. He has pissed on all of them. From a standing position at a circular table. In order to get the food that they're holding, he would have to piss on their faces and chests. And let's, where are those scenes?

Did they shoot them? Well, I know that also. I have to say, I was glad they weren't in there. I was glad they weren't in there. She said that the food stunk as she was throwing it out. That was, that to me gave me everything that I needed to see. Her scraping piss soaked dishes.

And then the father, I mean, there's so much to this movie, we could get by it by beat by beat. I mean, the fact that the other family left the delineation of who's in what room like they put cardboard, they put like a little construction paper up on each door, like, this is for Mr. and Mrs. So and so this is for the boy, this is for the girl. Like, why would they just, why would, yeah, so when he's running down the hall, every door has another label on it.

Like, so the, like they're like, well, we've determined where your family sleeps. And the grandpa still got the wrong room. He went and haunted the sister. It's a new layout for him. I love that, that he's like, I don't know the layout of this new place. That was pretty funny.

I loved it. I loved in the scene before when they're driving to town and they're all getting into a screaming fight. And the mom is like, Joshua, sing a song. Sing that song I like. Yeah. And they sing,

Row, Row, Row Your Boat. That's the song she liked in 1990. That's our favorite song, Joshua. As if she can't remember what it is. Not CNC Music Factory, Row, Row, Row Your Boat. Now I will say this, I laughed at that and I was like, that's ridiculous. But then Junot did remind me of something

that we have done on trips. What's that? We have sung the Burger King theme song in the Row Row Row Your Boat cadence with our family. What's the Burger King theme song? What is it? I can't remember. It's like, uh, have your way.

BK, have it your way. You rule. Oh my God. It's very catchy. And I know it doesn't make sense. I don't know why this is happening. B-K, have it your way, you rule. It is very catchy and I know it doesn't make sense. This has become a card trick game for us, but it has and we dread it. And doesn't Burger King have a new burger with Tillamook cheese on it? Hey, Tillamook, you can't beat Tillamook cheese. it? Hey, Tillamook, you can't be... Man, that sounds good. By the way, those poor actors, all the sweating of the green and the goo and the sandwiches

with the green, it just looked disgusting. The guy who gets turned into disgusting, the guy that gets turned into a tree, all that shit on him, it looked like he had an alien facehugger on his face. And you know it just took so long. And earlier in the movie, it looked like the boy had a chest burst or there's a lot of like references. Why can't they eat?

Like when the father goes, you can't piss on hospitality, which I think is a beautiful sentiment, obviously, you know, that's something that lesson learned. You can't piss on hospitality. And he goes for his belt. And I think, oh no, he's gonna use, he's going to use his belt on the boy. And then he's like, no, I'm tightening my belt to take away the hunger pains. Yeah.

Because so Paul, yes. So here's what. So all the food's been pissed on. Sure. We can't go back and eat that. can't go back and eat that. The one general store in town has those farmers hanging out in there who are not very welcoming and there's no food in town and it seems that they cannot get to any groceries, sundries. They're not- So they brought nothing. They brought nothing with them.

Why wouldn't they bring food? They're so angry that this this family his family's like they didn't leave anything for us It's like of course they didn't leave anything like I'm disgusting car. They have a car they can go What's confusing to me is the movies logic would make more sense if they were stranded, right? But they're not having the ability to move around as much as they want. They have also just arrived. They arrive, they walk in and the food is there. The boy pisses on the food. Then they are, then they appear to be so hungry as to be having eaten in weeks instead of mere hours.

Mustn't they have just had food on the road? What is going on? There is a time problem because they say it's nighttime and it's brightest day. It sure is. Oh, God. They can't say it. They say it's this time of night and it is daytime.

It's just simply daytime. Here is something that I did here. You know, the script writer was Italian. She wrote it in very, in a rough English. And the actors begged her, like, can we just put this in our own words? And they said no. So they were not able, they were never able to ad lib,

they were never able to like acknowledge what was going on. Like they had to just like, it was like, it was like Aaron Sorkin. That's why a teenage boy at one point said, don't fret. Yeah. Oh, oh, and so many, like the mother just calling him deer. Oh deer, go to bed deer, it's deer, oh. And I was like, so weird how, the mother just calling him deer. Oh, deer. Go to bed, deer. It's deer. Oh, and I was like, so weird how much she's only calling him deer.

And I don't want to, like, talk, like, look, yes, is the acting bad in this? Of course. We don't need to go over it that much. But I do believe the mom, and I want to just go back to it, the mom does look like she is heavily medicated. It's not like she's a bad actress. It looks like she is, or she has made a choice to seem like she is heavily medicated. It's not like she's a bad actress. It looks like she is, or she has made a choice

to seem like she's on Thorazine or something like that. There is, there's something going on. I think those goblin masks, they blink more often than the mom does in this movie. She just, just saucers that do not move no matter what's happening. She has nothing going on behind the eyes. She's gone, she's not there.

I wanted it to be revealed that the mom was in on the whole thing. The mom orchestrated it. Like that she was, yes, she killed her father. She brought them. Yes, she's from this town and has some connection because it's her father that's Grandpa Seth. No, doesn't seem like any of that.

Nothing. Here's my favorite part, it's her father that's Grandpa Seth. No, doesn't seem like any of that is true. Nothing. Here's my favorite part. It's scene eight, how they find out that Nilbog is goblin. And I have questions, but here, let's watch this. Grandpa. Grandpa Seth, are you there? Uh-oh. Nilbog, his goblin's spelled backwards! This is their kingdom!

What I love about this is, the plan was he will see the name of the town, he'll see Milbog in a mirror, and it will be reversed, so then he'll be able to read goblin. But when he looks at it in the mirror, it still spells, it's not reversed. There's no difference. Indecipherable is what it is. Yeah. It's like you, but yet he commits to, oh, for the first time I'm seeing it,

but there's no difference. But here's the thing. It doesn't matter that Joshua finds out it's Goblin. He knows there's Goblins. Exactly. He's the only one that knows the truth. Meanwhile, the father, the him and his dad have gone to the store. The father has fallen asleep within seconds of sitting down outdoors on a bench reading

a book that I believe just identifies different types of vegetables. It's called Cooking Vegetables, which is also in a flip book format. Yeah, it's like a children's book about cooking vegetables. He's like, oh, this looks interesting. It's like that thing where there's just absolutely nothing to read and you have time to kill

and you're like waiting in a waiting room or something. You're like, okay, I'll pick up this magazine that I otherwise wouldn't read. He has picked up this. He's picked up a picture, a child's picture. But where was it? Is it sitting on the street? Cause he's just-

I think it was sitting on that chair and did that book put him to sleep or is the father narcoleptic? Because from picking up that book to being completely zonked out is maybe 30 seconds. Yeah, at most. Yeah. Well, Paul, you said you have some sort of a cheat sheet on goblins and trolls. What do you see there about their relationship to vegetables?

Yeah, get back to that. Let's go to the Goblin faction. All right. This is, of course, by our producer, Molly Reynolds. She found this out. A goblin is a small, grotesque, monstrous creature appearing in folklore from European cultures. They have all kinds of temperance, temperaments, I'm sorry, and their appearances change based on the story or the country of origin. Goblet is how you refer to a female goblin. And Hobgoblins... I don't think there were any female goblins.

I didn't notice. I assumed they were all men, and maybe that's my bias that I have to know. And is the woman in the house that looks like a church, is she like queen of the goblins? What's the problem? I wanna get into her. Thank you for bringing her up. Or is she the goblin queen? I wanna just-

It's Stonehenge, but it's not. I wanna bring two things together and then, okay, I wanna get into this. I will also say this, the original English translations of the Smurfs, they were called the goblins. Oh, huh. So, and I think that Gargamel-

So Papa Goblin. Papa Goblin. Handy Goblin. Brainy Goblin. Goblinette. Goblinette. I'm realizing, and I wanna hear more from you, Paul, on this, but I'm realizing that I'm just thinking about gender and goblins now.

And I'm like, well, I saw men, I think I saw many adults and children, women, women and girls turn into goblins before my very eyes. But once they were goblins, I didn't see any gender identifiers. I assumed that they were all men, male creatures. They carried themselves like men, right? This seemed like a town, and it seemed like the women in the town, well, everybody that's a human is a goblin.

I don't know that we, I don't know that we, maybe. Right, because everybody is also- I mean, everybody in town is a goblin, yes. Everyone in town is certainly a goblin. But I do believe that the Gargamel character, if we're keeping the Smurfs analogy, is- Oh, the goblin queen? The goblin queen.

I think that she is like, these are my children, and she's pushing out, because she seems to be overseeing everything. Yeah, and she had- All of the infrastructure. Special powers, definitely. Doesn't she do something at the end that's super? Oh yeah.

Oh, she turns young and lightning. People that have powers in the movie, they use them like once and then. And yeah, so you can't really tell if it's like a thing that they go to a lot. Like even Grandpa Seth being able to shoot lightning, I was like, wait, why didn't we use this more free time? Yeah.

And also turns out that the humans have power too, which is to just, I think, think good thoughts. And Grandpa Seth says that- Well, that I have a lot of questions about. Yeah, we'll get to that, I guess. But Grandpa Seth says at the very end of the movie, at Stonehenge, he's like, and obviously as I've said before, just be good.

I'm like, sir, I have never heard this. I have not. And by the way, what does that even mean? Let's just see the witch's introduction, this costume, and look, again, they're low-hanging fruit here. Bad acting, bad sets, bad writing, whatever. I thought this woman was amazing. Me too.

Me too. And this is the best, yes, bad sets, bad writing, whatever. I thought this woman was amazing. Me too, me too. Fantastic. And this is the best, yes, best intro of any character. And I will say all of this while dressed like something you would get at a Halloween adventure. And to pull off that level of acting and that bat of a costume, really, truly.

And then when she turns into the young version with the lighting and the issues is Stevie Nicks like 1988 I love it like please I would that's I'm like somebody could take her scenes and cut of rad 80s 90s music video Like in crazy, yes, please Avril, please great. Go ahead. Here we go. All all right this is the introduction scene three allow me to introduce myself i am credence leonard of ancient druid origins my ancestors came from Stone Man. Am I mistaken or is there something wrong with the two of you? We...

We need a doctor, ma'am. Please call the nearest hospital. There is no hospital in Nilbog. We are used to curing ourselves. Loved it. Yeah. No notes. No. By the way, saying you're from Stonehenge is like saying I'm from the Empire State Building.

Like it's not, it's not a place that like Stonehenge isn't like an area. It is a, it's a, Stonehenge is literally a monument. It's not a town. Yeah. You didn't live in Stonehenge. It's not like you can say I'm from Atlantis. I did miss where, where, what did she say? Where did she say her, her family? Ancient Druid origins. Ancient Druid origins. That's the most vague way. Oh yes. Where are you from?

What country are you from? Oh, I have ancient Druid origins. You know, my dad is from Greece. My mom is of ancient Druid origins. Oh, oh, oh. ADO? My mom is ADO.. He's doing it. A-D-O? My mom is A-D-O, my dad's from Britain. Listen, by the way, special How Does This Give Me an All Star, Jessica St. Clair has

recently found out that she has more than your average amount of Neanderthal in her blood. Whoa. Yeah, yeah, yeah. So some of us do have to, you know, have to identify. Oh yeah, no, my 23 and me came back super high on ancient Druid origins. Super high.

Did Jessica St. Clair, did that really happen? Neanderthal? Yes, Adam. That's wild. She has a pretty high percentage of that. That's fantastic. Paul. Yeah. Paul and fantastic. Paul. Yeah.

Paul and Jason and Adam, there's a moment where they start, Grandpa Seth starts talking about how it's not just that this woman, this witch or whatever she is, Queen of the Goblins, has these powers, that the powers are coming from that little egg stone that she has that they must destroy. Oh. Yeah. And the light is coming from the crack in the rock, but then there's also the circular

stone that's... There's a lot of magic that is never given, at least as I could discern, exposition to help us understand the whys and the hows of it. It's just there. The rules are all over the place. Yes. And all of that feels very Rocky Horror. This whole, everything inside of this house felt very Rocky Horror picture in a wonderful

way. Like every part of this was straight. And if you're going to have like a MacGuffin, like a power center, like a thing where the power is emanating from, you should just have one of them because otherwise it just gets very confusing very fast. But yet it's all defeated by, and not to spoil it, a baloney sandwich.

Like a baloney sandwich really throws a wrench into everything. Cause they don't like meat. You know, the goblins are really climate warriors. There's also so much bologna. Yeah. I don't, and where did it come from? Grandpa Seth? The bologna sandwich? Yeah. Was he hoarding it? I mean, cause the daughter also says I was fasting for two days. She

doesn't say like, we didn't have food for two days. She fasts. By the way, that's good for her workout. She's getting jacked. She's cutting weight because she's a bodybuilder. I feel like the writer, now I know the Italian woman who wrote this screenplay, was just hung up on food and consuming food. You know what, that's a great reader.

Like I just think they're, and the filmmaker too, just can't, it's all about food and how grotesque it is. But Adam, there's a monologue when a bunch of the town's people are meeting in that little room, that little underground basement, I think for a service of some sort. I don't know what that was. A vegan service. They're just talking about the- A vegan service. It's like there will be blood.

Yeah. And they're talking about how disgusting meat is. I'm a vegetarian. And I'll tell you this much. But I will tell you, I found that monologue to be very effective. And I am, I don't eat meat, but I watched that and I was like, yeah, it's disgusting. It is disgusting. When she says, think about the fats in your blood, think about the cholesterol. I was, I was. But I do think on some level this writer wrote this because she's like, oh, I'm annoyed by

my friends. Vegetarians are pissing me off. And I'm writing them as these monsters. They're vegetarians are monsters to me. They get together, they commune, they talk about how great they are. Oh, they don't want to eat a steak sandwich. You fucking idiots. Give me more pizza with the sausage on it. Give me some of those steak sandwiches. You know, I used to eat meat. I used to eat meat up until I saw this movie this afternoon. And then you saw it. Wow.

Yeah. I'll be honest. I watched this whole movie. Not a thing was appetizing to me until that bologna sandwich. And I was like, absolutely chomp, chomp, let's go nom, nom, nom. I want that bologna sandwich. Now everything else looked absolutely disgusting. Well, of course. I mean, I'm a vegetarian, but I wasn't looking at those meals. And I mean, those of course were not appetizing.

The milk looked pretty good, I gotta say. Here's the part. Here's the only thing that looked good to me, the popcorn. The corn on the cob and the popcorn that resulted in it is simultaneously the best food scene in it and the sexiest scene I've ever seen in my life. I'll hit that clip. That scene worked. Oh, yeah, because if you can get a girl hot enough,

she's gonna pop. That scene worked. Oh yeah, because if you can get a girl hot enough, she's gonna pop. Yeah. Again, that scene, I was like, I am absolutely on board with this scene. I'm on board with the corn between them. I, not that I thought it was successful. Oh, when they are sharing it,

when they are lady in the tramping the corn on the cob, I was fucking- I was like, fucking, I was ready to rock. Uh. Yeah. Well, I mean, by the way, why was that boy so turned on? Again, when we go back and not to make it all about like gay panic, but she is like, so she's munching on that corn and he's like, oh, I wish that corn was my dick.

And that's, and, but then they eat corn together. So he, then he goes, so like the image is, oh, if that was my dick, that would be great. But then he, it seems like he just wants the corn because they're eating corn together. Like when she puts it in his mouth. Well, and then, but the corn becomes then the symbol of their explosive love

because it, one single ear of corn produces, I'm gonna say a metric ton of popcorn. Yeah. Like he is, he drowns in it. They're up to their ears in popcorn. He is in a grave, he is dead, he's DOA inside of popcorn. But they also, it also feels like they didn't have enough to really pull it off.

I think you're right, Paul, that it's like almost there and they didn't have quite enough popcorn to pull off the whole like drowning like in witness. So it appears that he could just stand up and he'd be fine. It's like somebody throwing popcorn at it. It just feels like aggressive because the popcorn, where is it even coming from? It should be coming from the kernel, but it's coming from the side right like that happens a couple of times isn't like George like looking down a hallway like left and right then walks two steps and that troll just like pops out of the side yeah it's like

you would have seen him he's he's standing in the hallway no one has peripheral vision I would like to say that I the chat has come up with a good joke and it is geocorn. Oh, that's great. The chat is saying geocorn, which is a home run. I don't know who said it. I just am seeing it splash by very quickly. Geocorn has shut down the chat. I will say this. There are some things that are disturbing

about this whole family too, because it's like the dads, you know, we talked about the mom saying, banish your grandfather's memory from your mind. We've talked about like, you know, the son pissing on the table. And then also at one point, the dad says to the daughter, are you still smoking dope? Like, still, like, not like, are you smoking dope? Are you still smoking? Well, because they all know she's cool as hell. Yeah, she's the coolest.

They all suck so hard. The movie should be about her. I scratched that. It's not about the boys in the RV. I'm only interested in Holly and what she's up to. She's working out for I don't know what. I wanted her to be so physically ready to do war, to do battle after having been working out so hard, not the case, but

she's fascinating. She's smoking dope. She's hanging out with the guys. She's giving them ultimatums. You're right. I want to talk about her. I'm so sorry to go back to her workout routine again, but it's connected because I do think it's fascinating that they didn't have her, they didn't have her like doing crunches. You know, like a classic young teenage girl, like I gotta do like a hundred crunches

and keep my stomach really, really flat. Like she's straight up chest pressing. Barbells pumping iron. Boom, yeah. 100%. Well, it's very much like we didn't know about crunches in the eighties. It was just barbells. We just did, and what's littered around her, more weight.

There were no split squats in the 80s. But there's no yoga, there's no yoga mat. There's nothing. And I will just say like her body is great. But it's not the, okay, be cool, bro, be cool. Take it easy, take it easy. Whoa, ho, ho, ho, ho. No, but it's not the body of a bodybuilder.

Like the amount of weights that she has in her room, I would expect a different kind of body. I was just thinking it looked exhausting. Let me ask you this. Is this her way of dealing with grief? Is this her way of embracing health and life in the face of death? Holly is saying, you know what?

I will build my body. I will strengthen my body. I will choose to remember Grandpa Seth because keep in mind, she also sees Grandpa Seth in a mirror. Sure does. And that's super weird. Scares the shit out of her.

And never, and doesn't, that doesn't back up the boy at all. The boy still remains everybody thinks he's crazy. Yeah. I will say that with all that working out, I wish, I agree, I wish she would have just fucking shredded some of those trolls at the end. Just take them out with her power.

Give her a sword. No she does. She does deck her a sword. Totally something. She does deck Elliot pretty hard. I mean, she destroys him with one punch. Weird sound effect for the punch, but yes, she does. Sure. This movie does have some interesting cinematography in the sense that there's a cake POV,

like we're coming in on the, there's some shots that are surprising in it. Like there are some things that, that feels like there's some artistry here. But when that cake comes into frame and they're going into their face at the party, that's like, they have a surprise party for no one at their house. And they're, and they're not fully put off by it.

And this is moments after the dad comes into a barn where he's watching his son being held down forcibly and being force-fed ice cream. Like, and the dad's like, all right, we gotta go back. But the ice cream wasn't green, which was interesting. Ice cream was white. It looked like whipped cream or something like that. So again, I don't want to be just pointing out inconsistencies because I don't wanna be just pointing out inconsistencies cause I don't think they add up to anything, but that helped, it wasn't helping me figure out the rules.

It was clearly not ice cream. Like if he eats anything that they give him, does he turn into a pile of green goo? Well, this is a thing, even the girl is- What is it? Beautiful freckles in the beginning of the movie. I mean, and I haven't seen natural freckles like that. I mean, what a blessed freckles. Definitely, really, yes. Well, Paul, just so you guys know,

there is a very big beauty trend where women are putting freckles on that look like that. Wow, wait, what? Right now, yeah, maybe not that distinct. Like Raggedy Ann and Andy painted on? Yeah, there's a lot of young women who are, and different beauty brands are selling these freckle pens and also freckle patches where you put this patch on

and then you pull it off and you have like this like. Ooh, I wish I'd known I would have put freckles on for this show. Broccoli freckles, is that what they're called? Broccoli freckles? I don't know. They might be, I don't know, butles on for this show. Broccoli freckles, is that what they're called? Broccoli freckles? I don't know. They might be, I don't know, but I've seen on TikTok. Paul is vegetable crazy.

That corn, that corn is going straight to Paul's head. He's only thinking about vegetables. Broccoli freckles? I have asparagus pimples. Guys, guys. Guys. Guys. Guys.

Guys. Guys. Guys. Guys. Guys. Guys. Guys. Guys. Guys. Oh my gosh, there is so much. Are they cruciferous? Are they cruciferous freckles? I mean, just think about little freckles on Brussels sprouts. How cute that would be, right?

Anyway, who's with me? I'll say this much. There is, I mean, there's so much to get into. I want to also like, I want to open up to questions. I want to, I want wanna get into it all. I do think it's worthy of just highlighting the boy who goes to the store, only gets milk, and then is chugging and running with milk, the most disgusting, like, oh, like it felt hot.

It felt like he was actually drinking milk too, and I was like, oh. It also seemed to me to be that the milk was thicker and grosser. So why not just get rid of it? Yeah, just toss it. Well, you know, I still horrified to think about how many times I would run in

from like playing outside as a kid. And I don't mean, I didn't have a glass of water till I was 18 years old. And so I would run in. Water was never an option when you were a child. Nobody ever offered it to me. No one offered water. Well, it was bad for you It was bad for you. I literally would fill up a giant like pint glass of milk. Yeah

That thick viscous vitamin D to quench that there I've talked about this and I've forgive me for bringing it up again, but my nighttime ritual was something I saw in Laverne and Shirley, which was mixing Coke and milk and I would drink it before bed. Ew, really? Wow. I remember that from Laverne and Shirley. Wow, you must have, your sh-

Did it keep you up? Your shits must have been crazy. Insane. I mean, I'm lactose intolerant too, so there must have been some moment. I mean, that was... Are you still doing that? A little bit. Almond milk now.

Every other night. Almond milk and Pepsi. I would love it if June came down, like, just, like, suddenly to get something after you thought she was in bed and she caught you pouring your, like, whole milk and coke. Jason, she catches me doing some weird shit all the time with food and it upsets her so much like you yelled at me. You yelled at me the other day. She's like, take your cereal out of here.

I was eating serious too late than than day mixing my cereal mixing. I'm Nick. I'm making mixes downstairs. That's fun, though. Mixing like crisp ex and Cheerios. First of all, I don't even like seeing people eat snacks. I'm someone who wants to see my loved ones eat a meal at a mealtime.

Eat your snacks. Yeah, you got mad at me. You were like, stop snacking. Stop snacking, yeah. I don't wanna see anybody eat. Eat on your own time. Eat privately. You know what, eat privately.

I don't need to see that process. It's obnoxious. I'll tell you this much. Let's go and pick some questions from the audience because I want to get to some of the special things that we have. It's a special guest that we have. So this one is Bad Jim Varney writes, did the dad think they were actually going to do some farming?

Like was there actual farm work? And this is a great question. It seemed like, yes. He mentioned it a couple of times. It seemed like they were responsible for keeping up that family's farm. They didn't seem like they were on the farm. They seemed like they had no knowledge of that. No, and in fact, Paul, in fact,

when the dad put the boy to bed, the night he pissed all over the dinner food, when he put the boy to bed, he said something about like, we're getting up bright and early, like crack of dawn, we're out here tending to the farm. And then the next morning, he did not seem to get up early and do any farm work or chores.

No, no. They never seem to even acknowledge the farm, but look, they're also dealing with a kid who's pissed all over the table. They're so hungry. Do they have to grow their own food? I mean, they, yeah, this is a bad vacation. Like you said, a bad vacation,

but I didn't see any farm tractors or anything. I didn't see anything. It didn't seem like a farm to me at all. No. Yeah, it didn't even seem like a farming town. It seemed like a sad town, but it seems like a town where, like, do they just bring in one family a

Month and then they live off that family, right? Yeah, and everybody feasts on that one family I mean you would think I mean you what an embarrassment of riches then to have this family of four plus the RV of four That's like that's eight. That's eight servings for 25 people total That's that's pretty awesome. What did those weirdos do with their house? They went and stayed in their house, right? Okay. But they didn't go. They just stayed in town.

Because they stayed in town. They had no desire to go. Oh, they didn't leave. They were just gonna wait. Their plan was they're gonna go inside, eat the food, they'll turn to trees and we'll eat them. But this is my issue. If I'm a goblin, if I'm a troll,

that family gets out of the car, I stab them, and I don't have to go through all this pomp and circumstance of making a meal and doing all this other stuff. I think you've got, I don't think, I think that, remember the guy says, blood will ruin the meat or something like that. You can't ruin, don't ruin the meat, or it's not, that's not quite what he says. But there is a sentiment that there is a process

that needs to be adhered to. Otherwise it renders the people inedible to the goblins. Again, what are we talking about? I hate this. Now look, now I know that you're saying that I'm obsessed with, with, with, you know, obviously vegetation, fruits and vegetables, things like that. Now I will say that there is this middle ground in the movie about vegetables and plant life, which are different things,

right? Vegetable, like, like trees, like growing into a tree is different than becoming like a vegetable, a vegetable, like trees and vegetables are not the same thing. No. I mean, right? Or, I mean, I just felt that- It's a good question. I don't under, this gets back to, I'm not sure why somebody turns into a pile of goo

that everybody just starts immediately eating versus Arnold who gets turned into a sprouting tree that gets put, he gets planted into a planter. With his coffee mug, he must have, that poor guy, must have been in this position for so long on that shoot with all that shit all over him. What a miserable day's work that must have been. Wait, oh, someone is saying that they nailed his shoes

to the floor so he couldn't move. What? That's how they kept him in that spot. They nailed his shoes to the floor so he couldn't move. What? That's how they kept him in that spot. They nailed his shoes to the floor, the actor's shoes to the floor. That's I guess in the documentary. What?

What are you saying? Amazing. Now going, not the wardrobe, the shoes. So here's the thing that I was getting back to. So Nil Blogger wrote, why did they all have that clover skin mark? This is again going to like, so clover leaf, we're going to Halloween 3, there's a lot of like, the clover doesn't necessarily translate into the tree either, but everybody who is-

Jared Ranere But somehow that suggests, again, connotes some sort of folkloric Irish, Scottish, the greens of like, I don't know, are we, are we, what's the book, okay, what's the book at the beginning, the chat, well, I'm sure chime in, what is the book, does the book that the grandpa Seth is reading to the boy in the beginning help give us a sense of what, what mythology we're even inside of, if any, or is it just this Italian woman's mélange of different folkloric ideas? I mean, now I'll tell you this. The Grandfathers is from Grandpa Seth. It reads from a book entitled Davy and the Goblins while telling Joshua the story of Peter and the Goblins.

So the book is called Davy and the Goblins. What? Story. I now think Grandpa Seth is a villain. And I'm also like, if you're gonna call one grandpa Grandpa Seth, then where's the other grandpa? And like, I always find it interesting, he has like Grandpa Ron out there somewhere, has he passed on or is he... Right.

You know, and... Why not just call him fucking Grandpa? And not a single mention of any grandmas. There's no grandmas. It was immaculate conception. Grandpa Seth just bore these children by himself. Yeah. Ooh, that's interesting.

But as some sort of a goblin adjacent person, I believe that they might have just grown out of him like fruit from a tree. Another question I will get here is Doc buttons wrote this, did anyone else think the dad was going to pee on the kid after he was on the food? 100% Yes. Yes.

I was hoping for it. Either that or just present his penis. I thought it felt very wrong. The way he took it. the way he took it, it was like, he did look like, at first it was like he's gonna hurt him with it, and then it's like he's gonna do something. Something bad's a coming.

Bad. That's all I had. Either way, not good. None of the dad's business with his belt worked on any level. It just suggested a myriad of terrible things are about to happen. That's right. That's right.

Now, let's talk about this. Look, we have opinions about this film. There are a lot of opinions. Some people say it's the worst film ever, but there are other people out there with a different opinion. Ladies and gentlemen, for the first time ever heard, it's now time for Second Opinions. Ben Lee, take it away! to make incisions. Check out Amazon user reviews, get a second opinion. Second opinions. Second opinions. Great.

The Roy Benley. He is amazing. Just one of the most creative, fun, down to do whatever person. He's so incredibly talented. And like I said, his sub stack is great. There's podcasts, there's things. Him and I only do a bunch of great stuff on there. I really, really love it.

These are five star reviews pulled from Amazon. It was hard to find these reviews, but I will say this. There are 1,240 reviews, 79% are five-star, 7% are one-star. So, you know, people love this movie. And the first one is from Jesse Purdy. Wow. This is certainly a movie.

Five stars. So a little bit, like we have these fun ones in here, but you know what? Again, I figured let's call in the big guns. We put a word out to this next performer. Ladies and gentlemen, please welcome Billy Porter reading a second opinion. All right, I'm Billy Porter and this review

is by someone called TK Raw. The subject line is a masterpiece. TK Raw writes I don't like to throw around superlatives recklessly but I wouldn't be surprised if God himself wrote and produced this film. It's stunning and perfect. Five stars, five, five, five, five across the board. The category is five stars, darlings.

Oh, amazing. Billy Porter, thank you so much for doing that. Amazing. I want to read one more here. This is from Jacob DeBri. Jacob DeBri writes, this movie was amazing. You could truly feel the pain of the actors as they were being devoured by the goblins. I wish I had a grandpa like Joshua. Five stars. That hard? There we go. I love that he wants that grandpa. That grandpa did not make me feel easy.

That grandpa made me feel uncomfortable. And his name was Seth. It felt like there was gonna be a reveal for the grandpa that would have felt meaningful and there really wasn't. He just appears, gives the boy a backpack, and disappears again. And he certainly wasn't a warm, loving presence to connect to.

He was scary. He was actively scary. Scared straight is sometimes what you have to do. Let me tell you this. If you haven't donated because you've very got it, I still wanna be surprised. We had Ben Lee, we had Billy Porter, we've had a lot of people here,

but I think when you think about this movie, you go the centerpiece. The rock of this movie is the dad, George Hardy. And you know what? Let's hear a second opinion from George Hardy. Hey, it's George Hardy. And I played the dad in the movie Troll 2. It was made in 1989.

And here I am today to read a second opinion for how did this get made. What an honor to be asked. So I do want to let you know Mr. Sean Kelly did write in, and I've got this memorized by now, Sean wrote in, hey how did that trash movie, Troll 1, compare to Troll 2? Well Troll 2 makes sense, and everybody was trying to make a good movie.

They really were. So I give it a five star. But he asked one more question. Why is it called Troll 2 when there's no trolls in Troll 2? There's goblins, anyway. I don't know. They were just going off some coattails, I think, of troll.

Anyway, hey you guys, you gotta remember one last thing. You can't piss on hospitality, I won't allow it. Yes! Have a great day, work on Troll 2. Troll 2 forever. Yes! He said it, he said the line! George Hardy is the best! That was amazing!

What a hero! And Jack, right? I mean, he looks in shape! He looks great! He looks great then, he looks great now. He kept the weights from the daughter's room. That was the thing he took from set. Alright, so let's go around. Anything that we haven't talked about that we want to talk about? And we got some more surprises.

So here we go. You know, the only thing I want to say is I don't know if we touched on the line, I'm Sheriff Gene Freak. Gene... I didn't hear that. Isn't it Gene Frank? No, I thought it was Gene Freak. Is it Gene Freak?

I wrote down Gene Freak. I don't know. Definitely. Gene Freak, I'm looking at the IMDB. It is Sheriff Gene Freak. Oh, that's amazing. Because I wrote it down. That's amazing.

A man in the township announced that he was, he introduced himself as Sheriff Gene Freak. June, not just the townsperson, the sheriff of a 25 person town, which he is one of, so 24 person town, which four of the members are away on vacation. So really a 20 person town. We've seen everyone in this town.

Yeah, we have. And they all go, we haven't talked about when they are all around, when they, we talked a little bit about they're all at the house, the family's house when they come back and they're throwing them an impromptu party. And then grandpa Seth appears corporeally with a Molotov cocktail. The priest comes out, they fight, and Grandpa Seth zaps the priest, the priest lights on fire. So only the boy and the fire, the engulfed in flames priest are in the yard. Everybody comes out, they put the priest out, and it's a goblin. Of course, the corpse is a goblin. But everybody's, the boy has done,

like, it feels so much like the boy has just done all of it. You know what I mean? That the boy is out there just- Right, so when the dad runs out there, he sees a man on fire, and the boy standing there, he's like, this is my son, he just pissed on the table, he's seeing visions of his grandfather, now he's lit a priest on fire. And the father just calmly puts him out. He knows exactly what that fire extinguisher is. He knows, oh, we keep it randomly just on the side of the porch.

Doesn't he say, I'm going to distract him with this, with the fire extinguisher? Yeah, with the molotov cocktail. Yeah. Oh, oh. What I also, Paul, you pulled the Oh My God clip, which I just think is very funny. Yeah, let's play this. Cause we haven't played this. Let's play clip four.

Oh yeah, this is great. Oh my God, what's happening to her? And why can't I move? There must be a logical reason for all of this. Shut up! Ah! Ah! Ah!

Ah! Ah! Ah! Ah! Ah! Ah! Ah! Ah!

Ah! Ah! She's changing! They can't see her. She's there. Ah! Ah! Ah!

Ah! Ah! Ah! Ah! Ah! Ah! They're eating her! And then they're going to eat me!

Oh my God. This man and this actor is amazing. Incredible. And I don't even think this is his best scene because his best scene is when the girl is attacked in the woods and he goes out to the goblins and says like, Yeah, guys, get out of here. Get it. Leave her alone.

Yeah. Like he doesn't react to the fact that these are full on creatures. Like these are goblin monsters. He's saying they're monsters. Yeah. He's like, it's not a good time. He's like, I'm out here trying to get laid guys. You got to, you got to spray him.

Isn't this also where he, he tackles the girl in the forest? Is that the same guy girl? That's right before this. And she hits the ground so hard, face first, into the, and you know they had no stunt people on this movie. This poor woman just gets taken down. And he stays on her. He also stays on her like they're in a romantic,

like they're rolling around. It's like, if I was like, thank you for, I don't know what he was doing, but like, get off me now. Yeah, I'll also go immediately. He's like, I'll show you a human body. Oh my God. Oh my God. All right. So I will tell you this. We've gathered here tonight for a very good reason, you know, to raise money for Move On. And I wanted to end the show with something special. We've talked about it throughout

the episode. Michael Stevenson, the young boy, the boy, he made a great documentary. It's called Best Worst Movie. You got to watch it. But we reached out to him and he wanted to do something very special for the show. So I have a full video of him. I cut it down to three or like a quick version here. We'll put the full video of him. I cut it down to three like a quick version here Well put the full video up on my youtube channel right now You can go check it out after the show But this is a brief word from Michael Stevenson about this movie. I love this. So here you go The boy speaks the boy speaks. I wanted to share something with you today

That I have not shared before an original prop from Troll 2. Wow. This is the chest piece. This, look at this. Whoa! I can smell this and I it's the smell of the latex. It instantly brings me back to European cigarettes. That's the smell of European cigarettes and old stale pizza in boxes. That's what we ate every single day was cheap pizza. Not like fancy Italian pizza,

but like cheap Domino's pizza. And they never ordered new pizza. It was the same pizza. They just ordered a big one, I think at the beginning of the production. And then we just kept eating from the same pizza. Thought it was a production. First time that I watched it,

I remember watching it with my family. 11 seconds into this film, or film, this VHS tape, my dad says, Michael Michael this is a terrible terrible movie no all these years later I can't tell you any longer that I feel troll too is a bad movie I think it is a magical movie I think that you know you think about the number of films that get made, more resources, more budget, fancy stars, fancy set, whatever it is, they're forgotten about. Almost many of them are forgotten about almost immediately after they're released. Uh, and troll two for reasons not intended and were planned has become

something, a film, a piece of work that will never be forgotten about. Yes. Yes. I love it. Yes. The boys speaks the truth. Yes. The boy speaks.

You can watch the whole video that he made for us on my YouTube page. And please make sure you check out his documentary. It's great. It's a great documentary. It is. It's a best worst movie. Adam, it was amazing to have you back.

Thank you guys. What a night here. Thank you everybody for tuning in. Thank you for spending Friday night with us. Thanks guys. Thank you Adam Scott. Bye bye. See you next time. Bye. That's for spending Friday night with us. Thanks guys. Thank you Adam Scott. Bye bye. See you next time.

That's a wrap on Troll 2. Thank you to the entire team at moveon.org for helping us put that together. We raised $181,000 and guess what? You can still continue to donate. How? Well, we have these amazing shirts, the Nilbog Milk T-shirt.

You can get it as a sticker, a coffee mug, whatever you want. You can get it at teapublic.com. And every bit of the money that we make from that is also going to move on, which is ensuring that people get out to vote. Thank you, MoveOn. Thank you, Billy Porter.

Thank you, Cast of Troll 2. And thank you, Ben Lee. Holy cow. I love that new second opinion song. Billy Porter, thank you cast of Troll 2, and thank you Ben Lee. Holy cow, I love that new second opinion song. People, how did this get made? And Dinosaur are coming to the East Coast. First of all, what's Dinosaur? Jason Manzoukas, myself, Nicole Beier,

Carl Tartt, Lisa Gilroy, Seth Morris, Rob Hubel, and more improvising for your pleasure. That's right, we are gonna be in Brooklyn, Boston, and DC. We've already sold out our first show in Brooklyn. We added a second show and that is just a mere few seats away from being sold out. So grab a friend, tell everybody, you know, Dinosaur is coming to DC and Boston and Brooklyn,

and you can get your tickets right now. Just go to HDTGM.com. And How Did This Get Made is going back to Philly. That's right, and we're gonna bring them a good movie this time. We have to. Philly, we're coming to you November 16th. November 16th, we will be in Philly.

Our LA dates are pretty much sold out except for November 8th. Get your tickets for that right now. Man, oh man, so many shows, but keep your eyes peeled because we might be opening up some more tickets to New York. It's sold out very quickly, but for you, we might have a few more in the coming weeks. Anyway, thank you so much, everybody.

Remember, if you have a correction or omission from Troll2, you can leave me a voicemail at 619 paul ask at 619 Paul ask or write a comment on our discord at discord.gg slash HD TGM then make sure to tune in next week to our last looks follow-up episode to hear me respond to your messages and announce our next movie please you don't know by now Jason joins me on every last looks to chat about movies, TV, books, and we even get to talk to some of our favorite friends. So if you're not listening, what are you doing?

I mean, we got good interviews on that show, really fun interviews. Anyway, I will always remind you because I'm out there plugging it all the time. My book, Joyful Recollections of Trauma, is still available as an audio book, as an ebook, and as a regular book book. And if you want me to personalize your book, Iful Recollections of Trauma, is still available as an audio book, as an ebook, and as a regular book book. And if you want me to personalize your book,

I'll do anything. I'll put a lot of stuff in there, Team Fred, not that. But everything else is fair game. You can go to my website and you can order a book at Chevalier's. They don't charge you anything more for it. I just have a deal with Chevalier's. You can also see where I've signed books

and left them around the country. But definitely, if you like the book, write a Google review or an Amazon review, I should say. And remember to keep the reviews coming on Goodreads. I am blown away. Thank you so much. And remember, one more thing, another remembrance here. If you listen to us on Apple podcasts or Spotify,

make sure that you subscribe to our feed and you have automatic downloads turned on. It helps us, wink, wink, helps us. Anyway, last but not least, I gotta thank our entire team for whom this show could not be done without. I'm talking about our producers, Scott Sonny and Molly Reynolds, our movie picking producer, Averill Halley,

our engineer, Casey Holford, and our associate producer, Jess Cisneros. That's all I got people. We'll see you next week on Last Looks. Bye for now!