HR BESTIES - Who’s the HR for HR?

Episode Date: March 6, 2024

Description:  Today’s Meeting Agenda:  Listener submitted story and tone deaf CEOs. Cringe corporate speak: Best Regards. Hot Topic: HR for HR. Who takes care of HR when HR has a problem? Ethics Hotlines, EAP’s and the importance of work besties. Looking outside of your organization. Burnout is very common among HR professionals. Putting yourself first and setting boundaries. Questions/Comments. Takeaways:  The Hole in One Plaque Store Ashley mentioned: https://www.etsy.com/market/april_wilkerson_store Your To-Do List: Grab merch, submit Questions & Comments, share your crazy work stories with us, and make sure that you’re the first to know about our In-Person Meetings (events!) at https://www.hrbesties.com. Follow your Besties across the socials and check out our resumes here: https://www.hrbesties.com/about.  We look forward to seeing you in our next meeting - don’t worry, we’ll keep to that hard stop! Yours in Business + Bullsh*t,  Leigh, Jamie & Ashley Follow Bestie Leigh! https://www.tiktok.com/@hrmanifesto https://www.instagram.com/hrmanifesto https://www.hrmanifesto.com Follow Bestie Ashley! https://www.tiktok.com/@managermethod  https://www.instagram.com/managermethod https://www.linkedin.com/in/ashleyherd/ https://managermethod.com Follow Bestie Jamie! https://www.millennialmisery.com/ Humorous Resources: Instagram • YouTube • Threads • Facebook • X Millennial Misery:  Instagram • Threads • Facebook • X Horrendous HR:  Instagram • Threads • Facebook Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

So, I'm going to tell you all a story that a Bestie sent us about a tone deaf CEO. Ooh, I love a good Bestie story. Yeah, and of course, Shocker, a tone deaf CEO? What are those? That's weird. So, the CEO was the owner of the quarterly newsletter. And on the front page, the very first article that you see is the company's record sales and profits because they had a big year he wanted to celebrate of course but of course the very next week that same CEO directed

the HR team to communicate to all employees that there was no budget for raises that year. You communicate this. So why was there no budget, you say? Oh, because the company decided to purchase a new piece of manufacturing equipment for one of the nine plants. I was told that all of our employees should be happy that one plant was getting a new machines because it would make their job better for a very small group of employees in a department of just one of nine plants.

I flat out refused to even try to gain employee buy-in for this stupid decision. This company is too big and the company had a hundred percent turnover. The manufacturing industry, which is absolutely horrendous and no one cared. That is a tale as old as time. When you said manufactured equipment, I will give a slight bit there that it was manufactured equipment and not that we bought a company plane for all the rest of the executives, because that's where I thought you were going. Yes, yeah.

But boy, that's a different line item. Yeah, it's not the same. That's a different budget expense that does not even touch. Yeah, it's like, oh my God, y'all worked so hard this year. Pump. Yeah. Y'all worked so hard this year. Pump. Yeah, y'all worked so hard this year. I'm gonna buy one piece of equipment.

That will make it easier for you to work even harder. Yeah. To make me more money. To make me more money. But you know, what really took me back was really that first sentence. What CEO is owning a newsletter? I know, thank you.

Can you please? Because somehow HR always gets. Oh, God. Well, that's the thing. I am so curious. the people that are listening, that have had those situations of senior leaders that literally they want to wordsmith everything. And you've hired a variety of internal

and external teams to do stuff, but then they're like, let me go ahead and. I was at a place not long ago where the CEO did own it and he loved to have like a corner section about him. He loved that. Oh, like learn more about me or something. I mean, he could love that if you tell some saucy details. Let me tell you about this crazy weekend.

I mean, I'd probably pay attention to that. Yeah, like he had a corner story. On the clock? Like, and it was the very first story always. It wasn't like, we're building a new location or something along those lines. It was't like, we're building a new location or something along those lines. It was always like, I watched my son graduate this weekend. And I'm like,

But you didn't because you're working so hard. Yeah. And I'm like, that's great. Don't get me wrong. That's a great accomplishment at kudos to your son. Then why can't you use that space to have it for rotating group of employees to tell their story? Exactly. It always gave me the ick though. Every time, like I couldn't even read his stories.

Employee spotlight or something as opposed to just the continual CEO spotlight. Just the single spotlight. There's not even a non-off switch for that because it's just on. Yeah, it's just always on. It's just on. Part of the challenges, and I appreciate her recognizing, one, this isn't going to do right by people, but then also having that courage

to say and do something about it. Because too often people are the messenger and it's HR communicating this, and it's a terrible message. You're not getting paid because... Good for her. Yeah, yeah. But it is funny, right?

Because then we always get blamed for that, just because we're the messenger of that. You're like, you're both braces. Let me tell you, I don't hold the purse strings to that. I don't want to write this shit, but I don't want to tell you this either, but here we are. But HR didn't give us bonuses this year. Oh my goodness, we're employees too.

We wanted that bonus as well, right? Bless her heart. I love that. Keep those stories. Yeah. We've gotten enough. So if we haven't read, you know, stay tuned over time, we will pick them.

And anything that doesn't get read on the pod, I will read it on a horrendous HR as well. Which is Jamie's excellent channel. You know, Jamie often on her channels, Humors, Resources and Millennial Misery, those listening are saying, what are you talking about? You know, Jamie has a multitude of channels. I know, some we can't even tell you about.

Yeah, that is literally true. Literally true. But humorous resources is kind of her, is in Millennial Misery are both meme pages. And so, but so Jamie amplifies a lot of other people, but horrendous HR, if you really want to support Jamie, follow horrendous HR because that's where like you get to see, I mean, again, the point of why I I in the Great Wolf Lodge gift shop had this

illumination of Jamie would be perfect on a black gas as well. She's really funny. She's really funny. Unfortunately, all me. Yes, she's no. It's fortunate. Jamie is beautiful and lovely and hilarious. So please follow horrendous HR as well.

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Let's go ahead and dive in. Let me run through the agenda for this meeting. First things first, we're going to do cringe corporate speak and Ashley is going to take the helm on that one. And then we are going to pivot into our hot topics. And today's topic is all about HR for HR. Surprise, sometimes HR has HR. Some of you all don't know that, but if you are a party of one out there or if your HR for HR sucks, we're here for you today. And so we'll dive into all of those things. And then because we do have a hard stop,

this isn't an all day off site or anything, we apologize for that. We are going to then transition into questions and comments at the end. And so Ashley, if you'd like to transition us into our first topic. I sincerely appreciate you saying that because I will introduce best regards

and generally the topic of email signatures, which I find frequently to be a topic of cringe. Okay, please just tell me some of these email signatures. Like I don't, best regards is, you know, I imagine this like, you know, twirl twirl, you can't see me, but you can hear me of like a twirl twirl bow. But this thing of like, how do you sign your emails?

And so what are some of the email signatures that you've seen that bring the cringe? Well, first off, I always use best. And I don't even, yeah. No, best what? Just best. I I always use best. And I don't even, yeah. Best what? Just best. I'm the fucking best?

It's just neutral. Best. Do your fucking best. Besties, you're gonna write besties. Besties. XOXO. I just put best. And people say that's passive aggressive.

I just mean it and, you know, I wish you the best basically. So that's what I, I'm texting and that's what we mean when we say that. So that's what I do. Maybe it's a regional thing, but it's not passive aggressive at all. And then if I actually like you

or you did something for me, I put thanks with an exclamation point. So if it's just informational, it gets best and I wish you the best or I will not put it. Jamie, have you ever got an email from Lee that has a thanks exclamation point? I feel like I'm gonna look back. I'm gonna see best.

I think I've only seen best. It's only if you've actually delivered something to me. And then I'm actually thankful. You've set the standard now. What about you, Jamie? But sometimes it's just informational, right? I'm more of a thank you, girly. Like that's, I don't have it.

It's not a standard in my signature. It has been before, but it, same thing. If like you're delivering something to me, it's an all caps, thank you, and then you're a fucking rock star. But you're a rock star. No, but seriously, if someone delivered a report to me, I'm like, you're an Excel wizard.

I actually always kind of go that extra mile to give them that. But if it's just a standard email, it's usually just a thank you. Sometimes people will follow in the footsteps of something like a predecessor or their boss or they'll try to like copy these things. I actually have baked into my emails.

It automatically says with thanks Ashley and then I have to change it. But I, when I was in college, I played field hockey and my field hockey coach used to sign her cards blue skies. And I thought that was great. It's cute. Well, thank you. Really cute.

Well, thank you. I appreciate that because once when I first first dating my husband and we stayed at his parents' house for a visit, I wrote them a thank you card and he like whatever, Dan Dan's like, uh, why'd you write blue skies to my parents? I'm like, well, they must have told what he was like, I mean, to this day, he's like blue skies. What the fuck are you talking about? Like that is so corny. And I'm like, I don't know.

I think it's the blue sky. I wish you blue. He's like, what are you talking about? Like it's partly cloudy. Partly cloudy. Like you're just giving the weather in your side out. It's sunny and clear, bitches. I like blue skies.

Thank you. I think that's fresh. Maybe it's more an HR for HR thing. I think it's an HR. So I'm curious how people sign off their emails, but it is funny when like, I used to see this in law firms that like associates, especially as they would like, follow the path of their leader.

And so it would be like my greatest pleasure or something. It would be something unique thing and then you would see somebody else do it and you'd be like, oh, come on, like don't do that. What gives me the ick is when people have like really cheesy corny quotes. Quotes, yes. I was thinking that. So to your question on what's the corny ick in the email. Any kind of quote, especially it's like don't be me wrong.

In a fuchsia color, it's always in a few. IT does, I don't think IT likes that. Like a script too, in like script lettering. Like girl. It's true. Yeah, it's absolutely. Those are the ones I hate personally. I don't like, no, don't get me wrong,

I've seen some like nice quotes, but. Yeah, go. I've seen some like ones where I'm like, that's what you chose. Often you see it in like an investigation and it's someone's like, this person's like me and you see this, you read the body of the email and they're like, God, that's aggressive. It's offensive. And then the quote is like, always be positive.

Sprinkle love everywhere. And you're like, okay. Like, you know, yeah. Oh God. Peaches and rainbows. Exactly. Blue skies. I like blue skies.

Actually, I do too. I think that's precious. Well, we can sign our emails to each other with that now. I'm gonna end up, my goal for 2024 is to get a thanks exclamation point. To exclamation point, I believe that's gonna happen. You gotta do something for me. And I've never done a two exclamation pointer

on that thanks. Just a one. It's like they put one of like all tens on dancing at the stars. So you can really have to. Yeah, like me on the other hand, I'm like mashing down the one that actually- I like a good, I like a Google image search.

And so I like a good like meme of like a funny Google image. You have to find the right person, but- Well, yeah. And again, IT, I don't think likes that because you're really sucking up some bandwidth. That's really not necessary. But that's, you know, unnecessary. It's the name of the game sometimes.

Well, what are some of the cringy ones you see? Do you see cringy ones out there? Yeah, I mean, I do like, I once thought bless your heart. No, that's not used correct. That's like writing FU. That is an FU from where I come from. Right, because in the South, that's exactly what it means. I'm from Texas, but yeah, no, I know.

And I remember, well, once I worked with somebody that did have a picture of herself smiling in her email signature. Oh my God. And it was at her desk. And again, like this, I keep bringing up, I'm not an IT brain, but I do have to imagine, like IT's like, please stop, please stop.

But it always made me, brought me joy when I would communicate, because I'd be like, oh, there's this person, especially if you work remotely. So I kind of like that,, there's this person, especially if you work remotely. So I kind of like that, but it's probably a worst practice from an IT standpoint. But I see- And from HR, that would be so funny.

But I saw an out of office, which probably is another topic, but the other, I send a weekly newsletter, and the other day I got one, I put it on my Instagram, the out of office literally was, thank you, I will respond to your email as time allows, or like I'm very busy or something. Yeah, it was awesome. It was great. It, thank you, I will respond to your email as time allows. Or like, I'm very busy or something. It was great.

It was just like, I will respond when I feel like it. That's it, no thanks. None of that signature, just it is what it is. And I respect that. I respect that too. I love all those Gen Z sign-offs, right? We all seen the memes and all of all the things that they're doing, you know what I mean?

I love those. If you haven't seen those, Google them because they're freaking hilarious. things that they're doing. You know what I mean? I love those. If you haven't seen those, Google them because they're freaking hilarious. Yeah, they're pretty good. Yeah. And some orgs, they kind of have like team competitions, you know, like the funniest sign off, you know. On my deathbed.

Yeah. Comma. Yeah. Like they're funny. It's like crying in corner. Yeah. Yeah. Oh, I love those.

All right. So we're going to try and use best regards then, pass it aggressively through the rest of this meeting. Feel free to try that on too in your email, especially if you are putting blue skies, perhaps best regards can be swapped in. I like blue skies. I think that's really cute.

I do too. I couldn't imagine like, you know, my CEO or something sending that, but I think that that would change the culture for real. Like a CEO like sending that, you know, male or female. But I do, I will probably, if I look, I think I'll probably cloudy. Thunderstorm.

Thunderstorm is like making some balls. Yeah, exactly. You know what, I think I'll just start using that, actually, and I'll just put however I'm feeling as the weather. Oh, yeah. You know, an icy, comma. Icey, queen. I know, exactly.

Oh, come on. There's a reason this is an email, not a phone call. Lee. Exactly, exactly. That's a good one. That's a good one. We'll adopt that one, too. All right. Well, that was today's cringe corporates. Love a good email sign off.

Moving now to our hot topic of the day, and that is everything HR for HR. Thoughts generally on HR for HR. Who wants to kick this off? Who takes care of HR when HR has a problem, right? Mm-hmm. That's what HR for HR is, right? Yeah.

Who takes care of HR? Serious question, but let's say I'm HR, I report to the CHRO and I have an issue with the CHRO. Who do I go to? You go to God, girl. Good fucking luck. And you go to? You go to God, girl. Good to fucking love. And you go to the streets, okay? You gotta get to get, I'm sorry, I'm sorry,

but that is my pro advice, nearly 20 years in corporate, you are fucked with the capital F. And so you go to God, girl. Good luck on that. But that is still a great existential question when you do have a problem, especially with someone in HR. What do you do and where do you go? Well, and I think the question too has come up a lot on my TikToks is like,

where am I supposed to go if I don't trust my HR? You know, and I'm like, well, there's always ethics hotlines. There's hotlines. Not always. Yeah, well, there's hopefully... Well, often not, but the way those ethics hotlines tend to work. They go to HR. Right, the ethics hotline isn't a wizard.

And so that's why it's super important for people to understand what happens, because frequently what happens is sometimes you may have external, you know, reviewers, investigators. Yeah, yeah, there might be a third party, there might not. Carmen San Diego, but like maybe that's... Where in the world is Carmen Sandiego? But is often it's going to be funneled back internally. So it's important for people to know that, but it really is true. We can give you advice and we will,

till there are thoughts, till we're blue skies in the face. But sometimes it really is a sign, but if you're C-H-R-O, your C-P-O is that one and that can exist, especially if that person has moved into role, it has not been an HR previously. That person has, oh, I'm finance background. Now I'm taking on HR as well. I'm a lean team, well, that's a real skill set, so that can be hard. But from a general HR standpoint,

it is important to know that people in HR, like things that I have found helpful, I in the past have used an EAP. Yeah. And I tell people that that's my personal choice. It is nobody's obligation to ever tell anybody you use it. But I've used it in part because I thought it would be helpful. And two, I also wanted to understand what that experience was like.

And I had feedback to that, no surprise. But I actually found it really, really helpful. And what that can be in EIP is an employee assistance program. More organizations, if you don't have it, please have it. Generally, the organization pays for it. It's not a high cost offer. And it provides free counseling, resources to employees and their dependents, generally whether they are in your benefits or not.

People globally, meaning outside of the US, will think, what the fuck is this? Because we have this big dent in the US, you often don't have this. And so you don't have these as a matter of rights. So the EAP though can have this. So it's important for HR to remember things like this, that you're sending emails about,

those do exist for you. And having sometimes those work besties and the people that you have from prior organizations who know what it's like and can remind you, you're a capable individual, but having that level of support is needed. Yeah, I'd love the feedback there on EAP, but you know, fun fact,

and we could get the latest year statistics, but I know just a couple of years ago, unfortunately the utilization in the US is like horrifically low as 4%. 96% of medium to large size organizations have them. But yeah, I mean, it's very, very low because there still is such a stigma and EAP equates to therapy for most people, even though they have tons of other different services, right? Legal support, caregiver assistance, I mean, all sorts of stuff, right?

As part of the EAPs typically. But I think that that's really great advice. And what I hear you saying, Ashley, is really looking outside of your organization too. Because HR, let me tell you, as a function has been one of the most toxic departments or groups that I have, except now it's all I've ever known, right?

But we have so much drama in HR a lot of times, especially in larger teams, larger multi-multi-billion dollar, 100,000 plus people organizations. I mean, it gets cutthroat, it gets very political. And partly it's because of a lack of HR for HR. That's what I see, right? Is a lot of folks just kind of doing what they can

to stomp down and kiss up and all of this. And I've just really, really seen that. And I've seen HR professionals almost take the position. Again, it happens in every function. I'm not saying HR, people are bad, we're not. But I do see HR professionals take the position, again, it happens in every function on my Tane HR, people are bad, we're not, but I do see HR professionals take that position where there's nothing I can do. And sometimes they're right.

There's literally nothing that you can do because you don't have access to certain support. You would be that person to you, right? You don't have that access. And so looking external is a wonderful reminder from EAPs to I think you said mentorship as well or mentoring outside, but organizations, memberships, groups outside your own HR can be very, very helpful. And I think, you know, I know I've said this before, I think the community that all three of us have

created with our social media, but now HR Besties is another outlet, right? And, you know, I'm a part of a group on Facebook that is, I don't wanna say it per se, but it's a great group on Facebook. And you can post anonymously if you just have a general question and kind of feel silly asking it, or you are having an issue with your boss and you just kind of want to be walked through. I mean, there are other outlets other than, you

know, being able to go to the CHRO or whomever to complain. So that's why I think each of us created our accounts. And, you know, I've, and I've said it millions of times, but I've been in HR department a lot. So it's very lonely and having a system, a support system, this could be past work besties and people that know you, but also these groups and what we've created, I think is very special and also helpful. And it's funny, as you said that,

I never thought about this, Leigh, but as you were talking, as you talk about HR, so I'm a little unique, I've been in legal and I've been in HR, including Eden House at companies. And I actually do probably find in legal departments, there is more collegiality and in part because in the law it's more defined. You have this qualification, it's win-loss, there's more structure. Black and white. It is, there's more defined. You have this qualification. It's win-loss. There's more structure. Black and white. It is. There's more structure. And sometimes you're dealing with the people issues, but

often it's more within the limits. What's legal? You have more of a road to go along. And my legal departments have all of them been incredibly collegial. And I think about that. And in the HR, though, I do think because you have the people of varying backgrounds, and you have people responsible for people challenges and people things that don't have training and from imposter syndrome to survival mechanism to self-preservation.

For a lot of those reasons, I do think you find this with people getting territorial and things like that, which is really, I literally never thought about that before. But so one thing that I think would be helpful, whether your team of one or you're a bigger team is in HR and in people who are going to be working with people issues. And so the question is, what can you do? So looking externally for support and then internally, what can you do? Because at a lot of organizations, you're going to run into the same frustrations,

which is, you know, we get all the same questions, we get these things. And some of it is when you're dealing with things like a benefits or timeout, people just don't know, and these are things that are really important. In UNHR, you live this day in and day out, and so while it can seem, oh, God, I get this question frequently. Well, you know, people don't realize that they have no idea what your inbox looks like. Everyone wants your time. And so what can you do to create resources to answer, okay, what questions am I getting a ton?

I've recommended this a lot. I've done this internally and I've recommended this a lot. What can I do for current employees to list out that information for new hires? And then for terminating employees to have things in one place to give people their own tools. And then what can you do also proactively? So when I was in legal and HR, I had a lot of the same questions about perform, oh, we need to make a change. Oh, we need to have this.

And so I started creating like news, like proactively creating newsletters and tips. And this is how you can run a meeting. This is how you can have these conversations. And giving those tools was something I was able to do autonomously and it made my life easier because I was getting less of the same questions and I was able to be more strategic. And so some of this was figuring out what you can actually do within your purview.

Yeah, you know, I love how Jamie kind of kicked us off with, you know, who takes care of HR? Who takes care of the caregivers, right? What happens when HR is burned out? Because really HR professionals are providing a lot of selfless service. There's a lot of selflessness in HR. And to your point, Ashley, it's, you know,

people don't know your inbox and most HR professionals inboxes are on fire. They are literally lit with gasoline. From people that want you to put out their fire immediately. Absolutely, they have to have it. You should know the knowledge top of hand and they need the answer right away for their own mental state. Yeah, and everyone has all the things going on.

So we're supposed to be subject matter experts and everything. And so who takes care of HR? You do, you take care of yourself. You prioritize yourself first. That is the greatest act of self-love. It truly is. You create those healthy boundaries. You can choose to do that.

I mean, so I have a lot of HR professionals that reached out to me and I do a lot of HR for HR coaching. And they talk about that a lot. Like, boy, I hate my life, right? I mean, people have been very blunt with that, right? And because I hate my work schedule and my work life and my job is overtaking my personal life

and I have no boundaries, I have no this. And it's kind of like, hey, and you know what the coolest thing is though about that, that you are totally in control of changing that. That is something that you own and that you can do. And so you really have to internalize that. Who takes care of you? You do, you prioritize that

because there really is that mentality in HR that it's everybody else first and you last. And that's what I have seen my entire career. We are the cobbler's kids without shoes. We're the last to get paid. We're the last to have training. We're the last to do fricking everything all the time. We have sometimes the lowest titles.

We'll be in a C suite room as directors. Are you fricking kidding me? And everybody else is a C title. That's disgusting. They have us reporting to finance sometimes. I mean, just the most ridiculous shit. And it's the same thing other professions, like nurses or teachers or whatever,

that they're experiencing as well, especially community helpers, like people that are, they're serving people day in and day out. That selfless service really, and we are those therapists, those corporate and business world therapists. And we just have to recognize and realize

that no one else is looking out for us in the workplace, the same way we look out for them. So it's really important to put yourself first. It's that whole oxygen mask, adage and all of that. But that is so important so that you can show up healthy each and every day. Sometimes people say, well, I'm giving myself love,

but then it's not, my love's not coming back to me because I'm still a team of one. I'm expected. But I do think for self advocacy is thinking about how then can I articulate these things I'm feeling. And I am in the same group as Jamie where people say I am burnt out. And that is, and so sometimes this advocacy is this managing up and talking to your leaders, whoever that is, CFO, CEO, other, your HR

leaders, insane, you know, articulating in that way. Because often those, those CEOs really often have no idea what your inbox looks like. And so sometimes it's like, this is a sense and don't let them get too close because let me see this employees complaint and you're like, no, that's not the point of this conversation. But so having the CEO sit that with there and have them look at the inbox to see the volume again, don't let them tell that, let me see that email from them. No, no, that's not the point of this conversation. But to say this is what I'm getting And it's really important for me to get answers to these questions so that people can have the information

they need to do their jobs. But I'm having trouble doing this alone and either two options. I'm gonna burn out candidly and I don't want to. I want to be here and be able to support people. And so whether that looks like adding additional resources, what can we do? Can we add headcount?

Can we add people? In freeing that in that language to say, other people are, you know, they're spending their day instead of on the sales call, calling me because they're trying to get answers to this. I want to get them that information. I can't do it on my own. And sometimes those types can be the self-advocacy by showing,

I want to help you meet business goals. I need more resources, whether that's people or otherwise, or I can't be expected to be on calls 24-7 because I'm gonna fizzle out and that's not good. I don't want that, you don't want that. And so meeting people where they are that way can be the way that you can lend that self-advocacy

to get some of those resources that are desperately needed in HR such people teams. Yeah. But do not forget one of the most powerful words that you can use for yourself is no. That is a word that I swear HR professionals don't know about. What's that word? It means on.

Let me write that down. Yeah, you mean on. On 24 seven, you know what I mean? So just be careful because that organization will exploit you too. So just be careful, create those healthy boundaries and support one another. And that's a big focus of ours when it comes to you,

our community, we're all about supporting. And if you don't have HR for HR, we are your HR for HR. And we hope you feel supported through HR Besties and our meeting. Thank you so much for that hot topic team. I think that was a very healthy thing to discuss here and hopefully something our audience appreciates. Again, I know we do have a hard stop coming

and so any questions or comments before we close this meeting? I have a comment, I have a question. Yes, oh you have a question. I have a question. Okay. Is as you think about relaxing, I have a question. I have a comment, but question. Okay. Is as you think about relaxing, when you're like not working,

what are like your hobbies or things that you do to like relax or chill when you're not at work? Y'all know what I do. What? Social media. Yeah, but see, I know. I was biting my tongue. I was gonna bite my tongue.

I gave you my best regards. I was gonna have positive intent. What else though? But to me, I see that as a job. Yeah, that's- It's a hobby you've monetized. Well, not enough. Yeah, I know, never.

It's never enough. You never do enough for you. Yeah, I don't know. I mean, that's, like I said, I feel like I have three full-time jobs, my real HR job, social media, and don't know. I mean, I, that's, like I said, I feel like I have three full-time jobs, my real HR job, social media, and then this podcast. So I don't feel like I probably take care of myself enough. One thing I will say that I was doing actually prior

to the pandemic was I was trying to take off one day a month for myself. My kids were in school and it might have just been me sleeping throughout the day. I was trying to take off one day a month for myself. My kids were in school and it might have been just been me sleeping throughout the day. It might have been me getting my hair done. It might again, me getting a facial, which I very rarely do this kind, but I was trying to do it every month. And most of the time it didn't happen once a month.

It was like once every two to three months. But I was really good about it and that really helped. But to be honest, when that pandemic hit, you know, all hell broke loose. And truthfully, I haven't gone back to that schedule simply because when you work from home, I almost feel like it's a little selfish of me to take a day because my kids are at school

and I can do laundry and not so much the sleep in part. But, you know, I haven't done that. And that's something I should, that's a 2024 goal really for me. Oh, that's nice. You know, I'll tell you, there is that pre COVID Lee, right? Where I was cute when she was cute, you know, yeah, she was like doing Peloton and she was doing marathon training, even though she's, you know, slower than a turtle in molasses. But she loves being out there,

getting that medal and that bling bling. But, you know, so there was me, I was training for a number of things and I was the one like on the My Fitness app or whatever the app. Oh, you guys travel. I have Strava. Yeah, I do Strava.

And I was drawing like penises and stuff in my runs. Like I do that. Yeah, if you follow me, you can see my, and I think I wrote out, I love tacos and stuff. Like I was doing all that crap. Don't judge my times. I was drawn. That shit's art.

I was concentrating more on the penis and the veins. Exactly, that shit's art there. Best regards. Yeah, but you know, and I was reading Pulitzer's and stuff and I was doing all sorts of sorts of things, but you know, it actually, the things that I like to do is that I am into like Netflix and Hulu and I, what I'm, but I'm mostly watching our documentaries

because I'm a huge human behavior nerd. And so I love that, just hearing crazy stories and learning, but I'm also very sensual, meaning not in a sex way. No, no, no, no, no. Not just in a sex way, man. No, no, no, no, no. But I'm a highly sensitive person.

And so sight, sounds, touches, smells. So I'm that freak that's like hanging out at the grocery store, touching, smelling and tasting everything. And I could have a date with myself at the grocery store for two hours. And I'm not kidding. So I'm just walking distance from a really badass grocery store in San Antonio. And I will just get a coffee, hot chocolate, wine, whatever. And I'm just going through the grocery store, no shit.

That sounds kind of amazing. No, it is fucking amazing. Okay, I love it. It's very similar to, so if you think you've seen HR manifesto in the grocery store, stroking. Oh, they have, they take pictures of it. Stroking, yeah. For the client.

The question is with Leslie Gut, have you ever heard of and or are you? Oh yeah, last night. Can I ask you a question? I was like, yes. Have you ever heard of or are you H.R. Manifesto? Yes and yes. I love it, we love it by the way. We do, we do love it.

But hey, a good place to paparazzi me, which has happened is at the grocery store. I'm just there caressing the milk and shit. Don't mind me, having a free tortilla and whatnot. Stroking the spaghetti squash. Oh my God, girl, you dirty. Oh my goodness. I will now though, I will try that out.

I'm gonna send you a picture next time I'm there. I don't wanna take a video for you. That's terrible, you have to pay extra for that. Best regards. Premium content. That's my OS shit. That's my OS shit, okay. Lee at the grocery store.

Oh my God. Revenue generator, I think. Damn. Okay. Well, now I'm thinking, you know, like my wheels are turning about the OF content with vegetables. Oh, that's terrible. Oh, no. No.

No. Okay. Transition. Transition. That took a turn. What do you do? What do you do? I can't think of anything. What do you do with do? I can't think of anything. No, what do you do with vegetables? Anything with a dead plant.

I can't think of anything that I do right now. Banana? Cucumber. Girl. I'm, no, I like to golf actually. I'm a left handed golfer. And so I love to golf. I've been golfing for years and years and years

and I don't golf enough with ladies. So when we do our HR Besties retreat, I will. I will say my first shot my daughter ever saw me hit was a hole in one. That's kick ass. And you know what, as crazy as somebody had DM me on Instagram, they're like, you post about golf and I don't post that much about golf,

but she's like, for some reason I saw it of you and it was a plaque for a hole in one. And I was like, wait, this was like a few months ago. And I was like, oh my God, I actually had a hole in one 10 years ago and I, and I never got a plaque for a hole in one. And I was like, wait, this was like a few months ago. And I was like, oh my God, I actually had a hole in one 10 years ago. And I never got a plaque. And so I ordered it from this craft person. I'll find it and I'll put it in the show notes

because it was so great. And it was total crazy coincidence. Yeah. And so I like to, I like to golf. I play tennis. I run, but I really like, not really, to be honest with you. Like I do play on like- You're just very active. Yeah. Oh yeah. I try to, I just like to get out and have a good time.

Like I'm a putt girly. I like to meet people. I've met people in tennis that will recognize me from social media. And it's like literally absolutely wild. It just, it doesn't happen that much. But I love to write. And so I did like a poem called

The Ballad of the Quarantine Mom at the beginning of COVID. And I always growing up, I always wanted to be a playwright. It was my goal. And so now I do that in the form of TikTok videos, 59 second videos and like. And so I love that. And I do that quite a bit outside of work work.

Oh, I love it. Any other questions or comments? No? Okay. that was, Jamie's like, no, she didn't want to use her voice. She's just shaking her head over there. Jamie Whiteburn over there. But I do have a question.

So not a comment, but a quick question for me. Since we're talking about HR and wellness within HR, I'm just curious, what's the craziest thing that you've been yelled at for as an HR professional? And I can go first while you think. But I, well God, put it on the list. Actually, I just thought of like 20 things now, but one of the craziest things,

I've been yelled at a lot unfortunately, was I had an employee come in and his check was off by a dime, 10 cents. And I got cussed out over a dime. And I said, here, take a fucking quarter and get the fuck out of here, basically. But in an HR way, oh, I'm so sorry about that, sir. Yeah.

You know? Well, you know, it's, I can't think of anything, but one thing that always works to my favor is pretending like I'm dumb, but then with the smart ass on the back end. Like, oh, let me take a look at that. You know, like, oh, I'll take a look at that for you. It looks like, oh, here's a quarter.

Like, I'm that girl. I wish you knew the day you deserved. Yeah. Ha ha ha ha. Oh, you ever been yelled at for something at work? Where you're like, that was rude as hell. Yeah, for sure. I've been more, I've probably been more yelled at with opposing counsel

when I was a lawyer. Lawyer, I'm sure. Although I actually am LinkedIn friends with a lot of people I worked with, even when I was a lawyer for companies, because I, you know, tried to get to resolutions. And I would say to people, and so I'd say, listen, I understand your perspective

and I would try to listen to it. And I would, you know, give the legal, you know, where I saw legal things were. But when it comes to people related things, I never saw having animosity. It really didn't help. Every once in a while those people bring it first and then I become fucked up, Ashley, and I will give it right back to them, but I do try to stay calm, but I do get irritated

on that when people are unnecessarily aggressive, which some lawyers are and it's ridiculous. But I tend to try to bring it back and have pretty good conversations. But I think the one thing is if you won't do people's benefits elections for them, like log in to their account and you show people how to do it. I don't have time for this shit. I'm trying to do this thing. Well, it makes two of us. Yeah, it makes two of us. Yeah, makes two of us.

And so that I have gotten. And yes, the American healthcare system in this system. We've actually made it pretty easy. Watch this, you know, this. If you watch this video, try to make this. Yeah, yep, yep. I actually had our CIO, who is a complete douchebag. He was, he was a terrible hire.

I said he was a terrible hire, you know. Once again, people don't listen. I don't listen. But probably a month or two in, he put me on a team's chat in a group with me, my boss, and him and said, well, Jamie told him this. The Buster under? Yeah. And like, then we all get on a team's call because that's what he did. and said, well, Jamie told him this. The Buster under Earth. Yeah. And like, then we all get on a team's call

cause that's what he decided everyone needed to be on a team's call. Luckily I didn't actually have any other meetings. So we quickly got, and he starts raising his voice to me. And I was like, I could feel myself boiling. Like I, and because usually I am cool, calm, collected Jamie because I'm HR Jamie and I'm wearing that hat and I could feel myself getting upset. So instead what I did was I literally did the, used the snippet tool from where what I had told the employee in our chat

the day prior and I just sent it in the teams while he's still yelling. And he, it's so funny, because my boss, you could tell she was like, even flustered herself because she knew me better than that. And she was like, I don't think Jamie would say that. And I was like, okay, okay. And then you can see him like look over and see it. And he was like, oh, okay. And he just hung up.

Oh my gosh. Yeah. What a chicken shit. Yeah. Oh. Yeah, he was always rude ass, but that really upset me. And don't get me wrong, look, everyone makes mistakes, everyone fucks up, but automatically having to be on the defense

is just so uncalled for. People assuming that that's not, we'll talk about that in a second. It's like, I'm sorry that your employee lied. Well, in a future staff meeting, it's assuming the worst in people. Yes, yes. That's another topic for another day.

Oh, damn. But we have Jamie's hard stop, so. I know, we do have Jamie's hard stop. She's very busy. And so we do wish you all best regards and blue skies. Until we meet again, besties, we can't wait to our next staff meeting. So long.